#dismantle the misogynoir

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

This is not to say I'm back or will be active, even though I have popped in more recently, but something is on my heart that I wanted to try to see if I could cast a net for kindred folk to connect or possibly create that much needed marginalized pocket of a fandom.

On this post, either reply, reblog with commentary, or put in the tags the fandoms and/or entertainment media that isolated you or made you feel like you could not connect with it due to misogynoir, antiblackness, and/or colorism against Black female characters, actresses, or fans.

Let this be your sounding board and possibly, your chance to find others in that/those fandom(s) who really wanted to socially enjoy, but never found their pocket.

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

One thing about me... when I approach a fandom or piece of media, I always approach with a shield. Fiction is supposed to be enjoyable, but the moment you see a Black woman or girl have something nice written, immediately, you know you'll either have this taken away, or face a racist fandom that disguises their motives with other layers of alleged progressiveness.

It is aggravating that with every ship that a Black woman could have, we are the main ones that have to feel these things, generally unanimously.

Shipping isn’t activism, still, from Abbie Mills to Bonnie Bennett to Iris West-Allen to Trina Robinson it’s always disturbing that people have such ugly reactions to Black women and girls being loved and cherished in fiction. 

[intransheart]

Deeper Than The Natural

Women Finding Common Ground For Sisterhood Diamond Styls Speak on “Natural Woman” In the midst of this fake Trans vs. Aretha Franklin debacle, I had some thoughts I would like to share. Cisgender and transgender women can find sisterhood in each other by focusing on their similarities instead of differences. Women, regardless of their gender identity, share common experiences and challenges…

[angelofsmalldeath-codeine]

It’s as if the Tories and Sunak are getting out of their way to lose the election. To which I say good.

After 14 years of their austerity politics, defunding the NHS and forcing European migrant workers back out of the UK because of xenophobia and misleading the British public, they have destroyed everything on their path and now are back on hating queer people.

Now Sunak is going after David Tennant on twitter. DT barely knows how to text on his iPhone and calls Instagram ‘MySpace’. The man has no social media and unless someone shows it to him, he won’t know what’s happening on the internet.

Sunak has also underestimated the backlash. Doctor Who fans will go to war to defend DT and Doctor Who fans aren’t the bigoted closed minded people Sunak is used to deal with. His/the tories’ dog whistles won’t work on them.

And finally, Sunak picking a bone with David Tennant is nothing but a diversion from the actual discussions that should be taking place:

- Obligatory National Service

- Cost of living

- Dismantling of the NHS

- Reduced access to education

- increased gender violence

- Unemployment

I could go on but we know how terrible of a shape the UK is right now. I moved away 4 years ago but it still hurts to see my friends having to live in this dumpster fire.

ETA: DT could have used better language when referring to KB? Yes, he most certainly should have because his message is being diluted and the discourse is being diverted to identity politics and how black women are always on the receiving end of criticism. I agree with this reading of the situation, but on the other hand Kemi Badenoch is being tokenised and weaponised by the tories in which anything you say against her is misogynoir. There’s no winning.

[auspicioustidings]

Right, if you consider yourself rad fem or gender critical I'm asking you to be open minded for the next few minutes and really try think about what I'm saying here.

I think that you think you are right, but nobody is immune to propaganda. Not me and not you. We are, all of us, being taught everyday to forgo our humanity in favour of upholding systems of oppression that hurt everybody. Systems of oppression that have had centuries to sophisticate their methods, the sneaky trap is letting you believe you are somehow too clever to ever buy the cruelty they are selling you.

I apologised sincerely to my best friend this year for a conversation we had in a car a year ago and I want to tell you about it because I think you could learn something from it.

We were talking about rape culture and I was going off about how women suffer under patriarchy. He mentioned that he has been sexually assaulted before as a man and it was by a woman. And do you know what I did? Probably what you if you are a rad fem would have done, I scolded him for trying to make a discussion about the suffering of women about him.

I turned to my best friend, a man I love, and fucking dismissed him out of hand when he was talking about something traumatic that happened to him. I put my anger at a system that hurts everybody above having a shred of humanity for the person sat next to me.

He graciously accepted my apology and said he understood why I had reacted that way. But we also talked about how his social media algorithms are constantly trying to shove him into alt right echo chambers and how careful he has to be because it can happen so fast that his feed starts to change.

And that is also what happens to EVERYONE. It is happening to you. Algorithmic radicalisation is a known phenomenon. Do you know who actually benefits from you hating any group of people for something about themselves they cannot change? The structures of oppression that you want to dismantle.

I mean this kindly because I understand how you might have wound up here and that it's hard to try and consider that you might be wrong, but you are being manipulated. Misandry leads to transphobia leads to racism leads to misogynoir. To you it might sound ridiculous, but I promise you that the minute you start losing humanity for the people you share the planet with, every structure of oppression that you are against will sink it's claws right into you. There is a reason that Joanne Rowling now attacks cis black women, she fell into the trap that you are going to fall into if you don't start trying to change.

Rad fem ideology is one of the funnels into the alt right. Neither me nor you wants you in two years time to have lost your humanity and be parroting talking points that you right now would find abhorrent because you get trapped in an echo chamber.

And yes, people are going to be mean to you over this even if you try to unlearn it because you're going to make mistakes. Your job is to recognise that you have caused hurt and you cannot expect everybody to just forgive that. Your job is to recognise you are not safe for some people and that is not going to change overnight.

The patriarchy thrives when you start cutting off your humanity to the people around you, do not let it win. It thrives when you start practicing gender essentialism, the same concept that the patriarchy runs on.

If none of this is sounding worrying to you as a rad fem then I as a stranger on the internet am not going to change your mind, so you are fully not welcome on my blog until you can start learning to change.

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

I will say I, personally, want dyke Shuri x Riri, and I hate that muffugga Namor for her, for nonracist purposes, but aside from that, let me tell y'all something that sometimes the old folks do not tell you about this "trend." This. Is. Not. New.

I am a 41 year old fangirl, and this has been happening since I was young, since before some of you were born. Now, sometimes, I think Black fans get defensive with some ships that they stroke everybody with the same brush. Like, no beloved, I DON'T want to see a Black woman with just any white boy who is popular.

Oftentimes, he's a POS, and I don't want to see him with *anybody,* and the girls have a problem with you if you see it that way. idc, I'm grown and a white man is not a prize to me. Especially if he ain't shit, and I more often than not don't even find them attractive, but I digress.

When you need to pay attention is when it's somebody that *does* think that man is attractive, and *does* appreciate that character. The ones who can see him with any fucking bitch in the yard, EXCEPT that Black woman.

Because truth be told, you niggas be coming at me sideways for not supporting some of these ships, but at large, the racist girlies got a different way. They try to dress it up and make it sound like that Black girl just isn't the person. Tussle with them or block them. Sometimes, tussle is good. Because it'll make them try to keep stupid shit to themselves. But, I always recommend, if you got the time and energy, bullying. Bully they ass, Girl. It be fun. 😌

Unpopular Opinion: Every time a black female character (especially if this black female character is dark skinned) enters into a relationship with the popular fan-favorite white male character usually one of three things happen a. the black female character is now headcanoned as a lesbian (never bisexual or queer or anything that would leave the character with the possibility of still entering into a relationship with a man) b. white male character is now shipped with other popular fan-favorite white male character/other white female character (the popular fan-favorite white male character is usually headcanoned to be bisexual and when he is, shipped with a woman that woman is always white) or c. black female character (and sometimes their actresses) is now being talked about as if they are the devil himself.

Wanting characters to explore their sexuality is fine but I always find it odd how this always happens when one member of the relationship is a black/blackish woman. *forgot to mention the suddenly polyamorous relationship the three (black female, white male and white male/woman) characters are now without a doubt in*

Anon you spoke nothing, but facts right here 🙌🏽

(The only thing I’d add is that they don’t just do this when the woman in question is with a white man, see Namor and Shuri and the backlash some shippers got for shipping them).

You aren’t the only one who has been noticing this trend.

I say trend loosely because really just a new stereotype to add to the bunch😒

It would be one thing if it was a want for actual representation, but every time now like clockwork. as soon as they see a Black woman who looks like she’s going to have a romantic arc with said popular fandom man, boom she must be gay😑

Hell, it’s getting so bad that these shows/movies are automatically just writing their Black women characters in that way.

If people can’t see how this can be harmful/dangerous, that’s cool, but anytime you want to paint all of a group a certain way and won’t show them in any other setting, that’s how you end up birthing new stereotypes.

This isn’t creating diversity. It’s limiting it(once again).

It’s so all or nothing with our media representation. Black women don’t want to be shown as one thing(which seems to go right over most people’s heads).

We just want the same opportunities as everybody else and not to be put into one or two narrow boxes of acceptable characterization that doesn’t threaten the status quo(aka you can't have Black women looking desirable especially not when there is an available white woman right there next to her).

[littleholmes]

I’m so upset but in my gut I knew this would happen, too many people said they would vote third party or not at all, some people were too stubborn about one or two things to look at the larger risk at hand, too many people have so much misogyny, misogynoir, and pure racism in their chests to vote for her, too many people don’t have media literacy, don’t have access to sources that tell facts about things like pro*ect 20** that will undoubtedly ruin us and dismantle democracy.

We can literally lose our rights to talk openly, to post on this platform and other social media. The media itself will be at risk because the party has literally said it. We will lose rights to choices and bodies and our selves. Other countries will be impacted so deeply by this. Y’all didn’t want to vote for her because of Palestine? What the actual fuck do you think he’s gonna do? What do you think you did by not voting and enabling essentially enabling her to win.

I just.

Yall hate black women that much?? Yall hate peace and stability and women and LGBTQIA people and free press and free expression that much??

If you didn’t vote even though you have the ability to in this country because you just couldn’t decide or you were just unhappy with the options and you sat on the fence at this crucial time, unfollow me and hopefully learn from the damage. If you voted for him, unfollow me.

I’m so upset right now. We were presented with a choice to preserve democracy and move forward and protect people’s rights and yall just flushed it down the drain. People don’t realize how deeply this is going to impact them. I’m just devastated but sadly not surprised because time and time again when it really matters people just don’t show up and I just…all we can do is keep voting while we can still vote because he said he would make it an autocracy so there’s that looming concern too

idk anymore yall i just don’t know

[sapropel]

On one side you have people (who generally. Are not women) who kind of think sexism is over who think they don't have any misogyny to examine and they will call random women they don't know bitches and rate their bodies or equate "women" with "she/hers and she/theys" and think they can navigate this space as immune to perpetuating misogyny because they are trans or gay (or sometimes even just women do this) and like. Their view of misogyny is so flat and one-dimensional they can't even begin to imagine that misogyny against white women is a completely different beast compared to misogynoir. These people can't tell you why a resurgence in bimbo aesthetic or coquette lolita cigarette lana del rey anorexia lifeway in the tiktok era is bad and they CANNOT fathom that "its bad that women are expected to wear makeup" should not be answered with "You only need a little foundation anyway."

On the other hand you have self-described radical feminists who reify gender roles and genuinely fear change. They want to dismantle the "idea" of patriarchy but all of their values are dependent upon its continued existence. Womanhood is a religion written in stone that can never be altered; never they mind it is the patriarchy that made this religion to sell to them. Instead of dismantling the patriarchy (which is something they literally don't even want because their narrow idea of womanhood is so precious to them. Radfems want womanhood without the woman attached to it.) they make trans women and sex workers their scapegoats. They lend power to patriarchs to squash the nonconformity that threatens their folk religion.

And you also have material feminists who bring intersectional critical analyses to the table. And the right hates them for being feminists and the left hates them for wanting leftists to work on their misogyny problem

[thusspoketrish]

top five books !!

Hi there!

Thank you so much for your ask x

This was so hard to narrow down. But here we go, haha. This also ended up a bit longer than I intended. Whoops!

My Top 5 Books: 

Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin. My God. Where do I begin with this painfully beautiful exploration of sexuality, identity, yearning, forbidden desire, repression, and grief all done in 159 pages?

Baldwin is a genius, my favorite writer of all time, and a true inspiration to me. He captured the dredges of the human psyche in this novel (in all of his novels, really) with such brutal honesty that smoothly oscillates between clean cut, surgical clarity and an achingly elegant beat of poetic prose. I first read the book at 17. I have reread it countless times since.

As a writer, I am so deeply touched by and indebted to Giovanni’s Room, the literary prowess of James Baldwin, and the impact his writing has had on me throughout my life.

Such a Fun Age by Kiley Reid. A relevant story on the perils of performative wokeness and classism as it feeds into casual racism/microaggressions, toxic relationships, and misogynoir. The protagonist is a young black nanny named Emira who is wrongfully accused of kidnapping the white child she’s babysitting by a security guard at a grocery store.

This book is the embodiment of the saying: “the most disrespected person in America is the black woman.” Emira is tried and tested at every turn, stuck in a cycle of devaluation and outright dismissal of her time, her energy, and her intelligence. Despite all the chaos, she’s not to be played with, and she circumvents the harmful stereotype of the “strong black woman.” Instead of having to strictly endure the pain and negativity thrown at her with complete stoicism, she allows herself the space to be vulnerable, to explore her self-doubts, and to process the impact the grocery incident had on her.

Black women can be soft, too, blue, too, and that's absolutely okay. This is so important to see represented in media, in literature, and in life.

Ways of Seeing by John Berger. There are a number of texts that dismantle elitism, the male gaze, and highlight the importance of historical, social, and cultural context to truly understand art, but Berger does it in a way that is accessible and timeless.

His work has always been a staple in my own research and institutional critiques on the inaccessibility of the art world, the austerity of museum spaces and practice, and the continued exclusion and mishandling of marginalized narratives within our canonical understanding of modern and contemporary art.

(Pssst…Outside of Berger, let me turn you on to performance artist Andrea Fraser, whose institutional critiques are hilarious, unapologetic, and without fail a gloriously biting commentary on the absurdity of the art world and our obsession with its lusty commodification and pretentiousness. Little Frank and His Carp (2011) is still a performance that lives rent free in my head.)

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald. This book holds sentimental value for me. It was one of my dad’s favorites, and he loved the 1974 film adaptation.

What’s not to love about this American classic that captures nostalgia in such a poignant way? We also have the glitz and glamour of the Roaring 20s, the socialites, fake identities/personalities, obsession, unrequited love, broken dreams and promises, and murder.

And it’s all depicted in such a lush and beautiful way that it takes you almost by surprise when you finally realize just how terrifyingly cold and empty this world that Fitzgerald crafted for us is. Love it!

The Trial by Franz Kafka. No one portrays absurdism, existentialism, loneliness, and depressed but horny unreliable narrators quite like Kafka! He is a master at building dread and confusion while disorienting his imperfect protagonists (and his readers) by dropping us in the middle of harrowing situations.

I’m a huge fan of his work, and it’s hard to narrow down my appreciation of it to just one book for this list, but The Trial has to be my absolute favorite. I am a sucker for witnessing the moral flailing of somewhat problematic protagonists. K’s arrogance and superiority, tempered by his utter helplessness and increasing instability against the metaphysical force of the Law, make him an instant favorite character of mine. He struggles against a tyrannical bureaucratic system hellbent on stripping away his autonomy by trapping in the ambiguity of an inexplicable hell. K never learns of the crime he's being accused of and neither do we as the reader.

The book satisfies my love for a critique of flawed judicial systems, while also exploring the impact of paranoia, isolation, and existential dread, all wrapped up in the tension of a psychological horror/thriller. I also love a story that comes full circle at the end, even if it is abrupt, tragic, and maybe even meaningless, despite K.'s desperation to find meaning within the absurd.

Ask me my "TOP 5/TOP 10" anything!

[colorisbyshe]

( also... homophobia even towards gay men is VERY tightly linked to misogyny as is biphobia gender based prejudice cannot be removed from your understanding of homophobia transphobia ro biphobia even towards men ESPECIALLY towards men) good tags! reminds me of an article I read once about how misogyny heavily intersected with homophobia and transphobia on many levels, and how places less tolerant of it were also less homophobic/transphobic, but I've never been able to find it 🥲

There's a fair amount of writing on this phenomenon. I can't link to any of it because it's all stuff I read in my like Baby College Feminist Days but it was actually foundational to my understanding of like... gender as a whole.

But, honestly, I think any deep dive into any form of systemic oppression will make you realize how ALL forms of oppression are very, very tightly linked (which is why we should all be allies with each other and really emphasize our points of overlap and give EXTRA support to people who exist at multiple points of oppression and recognize they are most equipped to vocalize how these systems work).

Like obviously all policing of gender effects women, gay/bisexual people, and trans people. And even cisgender, straight men through how they police each other (toxic masculinity, a term that was fucking obliterated by bad faith actors but STILL has value).

But HOW we understand gender and the methods in which we enforce gender are heavily influenced by... racism. White supremacy. Colonialism. And that spins off into concepts like fetishization, desexualization, forced sterilization, and... eugenics.

Eugenics is obviously tied to reproductive justice and reproductive CONTROL which ties back to feminism, misogyny. But is also heavily tied to ableism and classism. Easy targets of the intersection of ableism and classism are fat people, thus fatphobia. Any "undesirable" group is going to be framed as breeding too much and taking too much from society (see: the misogynoir depictions of the welfare queen) or as sexual predators who need to be castrated, sterilized (gay people, immigrants). Undesirable people won't be given assistance with trying to achieve reproduction, either (fat people are often denied things like IVF or have tougher times finding fertility coaches).

And obviously eugenics is tied to the forced institutionalization and criminalization of vulnerable groups--neurodivergent people, people of color, poor people, immigrants etc..

And I could go on and on tying all of these groups together.

Proving that like... you can't ally yoruself with one group while throwing another under the bus. Not just because people exist who belong to both groups and would be hurt by that but because the same causes hurt all the same groups. And the logic to apply those harms to "other" groups will apply to yours.

If you try to stand on someone else's shoulders while people are trying to bash their knee caps off, you're gonna fall when they fall.

So, aside from like "You should love your fellow human ebings because they are human beings," in a very selfish sense... you should love them and listen to them and HELP them because the same focres attacking you are attacking them and you can't dismantle that system without recognizing that.

You can't agree with the bigoted people holding YOU down and then just go "All of that is right, except for where it applies to me" and expect to make meaningful change against them.

[duxwontobey]

100% true not that you need verification from me

Black and brown trans people suffer even more sexual and physical violence which is horrifying as the rate for trans people in general is 50% and get viewed through the usual lenses of "violent black man and bitchy black woman" in a way that is transphobic AND racist.

The same is true for gay people, particularly black or brown drag artists.

Black and brown disabled people have more struggles with getting benefits, equipment and respect for their disabilities, and as mentioned later in the post autistic black and brown people are much less likely to be listened to, and are much more likely to be the victims of violence from cops as shown repeatedly with many dead autistic black and brown kids who were never given help and instead shot by police.

Black and brown women face not only conventional misogyny but also misogynoir as they are more likely to be dismissed, seen as "bitchy, argumentative etc." and in the horrific running theme here, more likely to be victims of sexual violence.

These are inarguable facts, but they don't invalidate the experiences of non-black individuals, as those struggles are also real. It's more about acknowledging the realities of racism, addressing our own biases and coming together with those who face these additional problems. Because once the racist structures in the world fall, a hell of a lot of other problems go away too, as the structures that inflict this on minoritized people in the world are often the same that inflict it on everyone.

The only way through this is solidarity, together we will dismantle the oppression we all face.

i dont think whites understand how being white makes literally everything easier.

it effects everything.

being trans is easier when youre white.

being gay is easier when youre white.

being disabled is easier when youre white.

being a woman is easier when youre white.

being autistic is easier when youre white.

oppression is eased when you are white, as you get extra privileges, and your whiteness is seen as a positive characteristic that in some ways counter-balances your other forms of being a minority. whiteness controls everything.

you are automatically way more innocent in your own oppression as a gay, trans, disabled person because of your whiteness.

never forget this.

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

This is Cruella in the Descendants movie.

Cruella De Vil is played by Wendy Raquel Robinson, a Black woman, and her son Carlos is played by a biracial actor with a Black parent.

But, if you search Tumblr for Descendants' Cruella, you would never know that. Because the majority of the Cruella posts that are tagged for Descendants have Emma Stone, a fully white woman and no sign of Carlos' Black half. I saw a total of one post with some lightskint FC as his father (I guess to make up for mentally recasting his mother as a white woman).

HCs and AUs abound erasing one of the sprinkle of Black women that crapshow series bothered to give a paycheck to. It don't surprise me, because the Black girls been complaining about the Descendants fandom for YEARS, but it is annoying. I thank God the kids in my life at that time never wasted their time in that antiblack media and racist fandom.

[rebeleden]

‘Bring it on’: Sen. Laphonza Butler dismantles racist, sexist attacks ag...

CC RABID MISOGYNOIR AND BLACK FEMICIDE

STOP NAZI VANILLA ISIS

CC KKKARMA IN ROEVEMBER

[saintjosie]

i posted this without nuance because i was annoyed but there are some tags that are misunderstanding transmisogny and also why i hate the idea of “tme”. so let me break it down for yall.

first of all, what is transmisogny? transmisogny is a term coined to label the specific form of marginalization that occurs at the intersection of both transphobia and misogny as it affects trans women. and yes, this only applies to trans women because that’s just the definition of the word as we use it at the moment and it’s not something i just made up. yes there are people who experience who experience both transphobia and misogyny but in this case, that is not what we are talking about.

well that sure sounds like some people are exempt from experiencing transmisogyny doesn’t it? so then what’s the issue with “tme”?

the issue is how the discussion around transmisogny has evolved. transmisogny is absolutely a necessary concept in the same way that misogynoir is a necessary concept. we needed a word to describe the unique intersection of transphobia and misogyny that trans women face in order to discuss it. and in many other online spaces and also in discussions that happen in irl queer circles, that’s exactly how it’s used. and that’s a good thing!

but also there has been a noticeable shift in online spaces where terms that we use within the trans community have been weaponized against other trans women to invalidate the way that some people transition.

for example, the terms “transsexual” has a complicated history of being used to invalidate the experiences of trans women unable to medically transition and weaponized against bipoc trans women specifically. that’s where the term originally comes from.

if you don’t believe me then listen to the experts:

mardi is a trans woman who is deeply respect because she is literally living history and a trailblazer carving the for trans women to exist as we do today.

and this is the post that educated me about this. (i’m not gonna find a link, you can do that yourself, but i absolutely did do the research and found the history of this and you can too.)

now does that mean that i think trans people should stop using the label transsexual? no, absolutely not. and that’s because this is a label that was slowly being reclaimed. but there is an enormous difference between knowing and understanding the complicated history of a label and its usage and choosing to use it anyways for the sake of reclamation and then actively working towards dismantling oppression.

and i specifically want to emphasize both the “was” and “active” portions here because the sad truth is that the overwhelming majority of people who identify as transsexual do not know or understand the history of the label and also do not ACTIVELY work towards dismantling oppression. and even worse, an overwhelming majority of these people are unknowingly and sometimes even intentionally using transsexual to once again differentiate between those able to “fully” medically transition. and yeah that means that these people are specifically invalidating any trans woman who doesn’t have bottom dysphoria and doesn’t want bottom surgery.

and THAT is the issue. online trans discourse is regressing back through decades of work that bipoc trans women and intersectional feminists have fought for with their blood sweat and tears, all so that the most privileged of white trans women can defend their twitter presence and throw their weight around online.

and now a major trigger warning is necessary for the next paragraph for mention of suicide.

//having once been welcomed into and also actively a part of these circles, i’ve seen trans women of color harrassed and bullied off the internet by white trans fems with hundreds of thousands of twitter followers. i’ve seen bipoc trans women literally take their own lives over this.// end tw.

and now we come back to transmisogny and “tme”. the white trans women committing actual violence towards other trans women are using their marginalized identity as a shield to prevent themselves from criticism. they are using the fact that they sit at the intersection of transphobia and misogyny to excuse their behavior and go without any consequence.

i’ve seen these trans women go on rants after this violence has occurred saying things like “that’s horrible that this person faced this but also i am still right and i can say these things because i am a trans woman and i face constant marginalization online.”

and to be perfectly honest, i talk about this mainly because this is something i have been guilty of myself in the past. because i, as a cis-passing east asian trans woman with pretty privilege, have proximity to whiteness in a way that bipoc trans women do not. and once it was pointed out to me by an incredibly kind and gracious bipoc trans woman, i had to take a real long and hard look at my internet presence and subsequently had work on myself for years to correct and atone for.

now we get to the core of the issue that i have with the idea of “tme”. this is the exact same behavior that we are now seeing from trans women who frequently talk about “tme”. and yep, once again the overwhelming majority of people who are using this are white.

by nature, the word exempt is excluding anyone who doesn’t identify as a trans woman from having any meaningful participation in the discussion around transmisogny because we are using this as a phrase to mean “shut up and listen to people more marginalized than you”. and more than the hurt that causes to “tme people” the real damage that this discussion has caused is to our own community.

because guess what, we as trans women DO face the most marginalization. and all we are doing by talking transmisogny in this way is alienating many of our own allies and degrading hope in true solidarity within our own community.

the reason i am so adamant about making this point is that there is an incredibly real problem of white queer people in general failing to recognize that white privilege will always supercede and form of marginalization. we talk about intersectionality by name only without ACTIVELY doing the work to dismantle oppression and in doing so, continue to alienate black and indigenous people within our community.

without acknowledging and dismantling whiteness, we end up doing things like making the majority of queer spaces irl inaccessible. how often do you see disabled people at queer bars? have you even bothered to check if your favorite queer bar has wheel chair access that isn’t being just being ushered by an employee through the back door?

how often do you see bipoc trans people in these spaces? have you ever stopped to ask them why? do you even know any bipoc trans people to ask?

ACTIVE dismantling requires more than just reblogging takes you see online.

ACTIVE dismantling requires listening.

ACTIVE dismantling requires constant self reflection and dismantling of your own privilege.

ACTIVE dismantling means praxis and not just discourse.

so if you have actually read this far, i would like to ask you - have you forgotten the active portion of your activism? are you “tma” and perpetuating transmisogny through alienation of the rest of our community?

just food for thought.

i think it’s very important to note that while discussions of transmisogny very much so exist in other online and real world spaces, discussions of “tme” do not…except in transmedicalist spaces

i wonder why that is?

[lemmeaskthedevil]

Any tips for helping moms dismantle internalized misogynoir and other patriarchal thoughts?

[neshatriumphs]

Our girls deserve defense.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10164960363910548&id=736700547