#disclaimer: this is super much a joke and please don't take it seriously

[likeastarstar]

rank the boys from best to worst boyfriend!!

LOL THIS IS FUNNY

disclaimer this is a joke and in no way reflective of the boys actual personalities and boyfriend abilities or a diss in anyway this is just me and my head ok

BEST

Taehyung would probably the best boyfriend just bc he's so romantic and lovesick lol I feel like he'd never forget a birthday or an anniversary and he'd want to meet your parents and take care of you and he'd be so good at planning dates. He'd wake you up with coffee in bed and try to make you breakfast but burn it and all of that cheesy, adorable shit.

Hoseok would probably be next because he's just so incredibly sweet and nice and attentive. He'd never leave messes around the house for you to clean up and would buy you cute little matching outfits to stroll around town in. I think he'd listen to you when you need to rant and actually give you rly valid advice. I also think he'd be that boyfriend who takes care of your friends the way he takes care of you like girls night is always at your house and he's down for the gossip sesh

Jimin is next. he'd be higher but honestly he would prioritize work sometimes I think like if he needed to stay at the studio late to perfect something he would and while he'd shoot you a text to let you know, I think it would be important to him that his partner knows his career is a priority and to be flexible about it. But I do think he'd be so attentive and so loving and just so incredibly sweet as a boyfriend! I think he'd never make you ask for attention or more love bc he just is love in a human form.

Yoongi would be a pretty good boyfriend but I also think he's not like a big anniversary, huge display of affection, type of guy. I think he'd be so attentive and loving but in a rly quiet, humble way. I also think while he's around you all the time, he wouldn't be the biggest date planner. Like he's not gonna organize a string quartet and rent a helicopter for a random saturday night BUT he will get takeout from your favorite place and watch pride and prejudice with you and then give you a back massage

Jin is next! He would be a great boyfriend! He would be baby tho. You'd have to remind him about events he already said yes to going to and set out exactly what he should wear or else he's going in matching sweats lol I think he'd be willing to meet your parents and your friends but he would whine and be dramatic about it bc he gets nervous and why can't you guys just stay home? please? please? PLEAAASE? No? Fine. But you're letting me stay up all night playing video games to make up for it.

Jungkook is next....I really sat here debating whether or not he'd be last or second to last lol. ITS NOT THAT HED BE A BAD BOYFRIEND! ITS JUST--- boy zones out, ok? he zones out a lot. He also is extremely independent. He'd forget to call you if he gets sucked into something he's doing. He prioritizes his job and takes things very seriously and I don't see him wanting to take chances when it comes to his career, understandably so. I feel like he'd be so fun to go on dates tho and you guys text all the time and send funny tiktoks back and forth and are best friends

Namjoon. I'm sorry. He's a good boyfriend but he's endearingly not a good boyfriend at the same time. He tries really hard and to be honest who cares about the details when you're dating Joon bc you love him so much but yeah he probably forgets anniversaries and has no idea what birthday gift to get you so he asks the sales attendants for help but when he describes you he says you "always smells really nice, like really warm and comforting but also clean and fresh like a flower. They like to dress up sometimes but sometimes they're just in a t-shirt and shorts and that looks super good too-"

NOT SO BEST

[selene-tarot]

Hi~ can you do reading about how TWICE members feel about each other as bandmates & sisters? Thank you in advance and have a nice day.

TWICE Dynamic Reading

DISCLAIMER: This is all ALLEGED, please take this reading with a grain of salt, the reading may not be a 100% correct and just know this is tarot, don't take it super seriously. This is for entertainment purposes only.

Nowww I know I don't do girl group readings often which is something I should prioritize more honestly💀

Card's I drew: 10 of wands, 9 of wands, death rx, the fool, the hermit, and the magician, the siren, frigid, blast from the past, warrior rx, child: divine, priest, and a couple of clarification card

For the most part I feel the most of the members find being around each other a bit stressful. Being realistic here, how do we expect for all 9-10(?) members to all live in harmony with each other for 7 consecutive years? I couldn't😭. One thing I will say though is that they were way more closer as a group a few years ago than they are now heading towards disbandment. The 9 of wands being here with clarifiers I feel like some members are a bit more watchful and tense towards each other, so they tend to be a bit defensive and awkward when interacting on camera at times. You might be able to notice when they do skin-ships or joke around it might not feel as genuine or someone may tense up when being touched and etc.... I also do also see that there tend to be a lot more disagreements and arguments that are not shown or told.

In particular I see a one twice member or 2 that is just not happy being in the group at all. The death rx alludes to no change/ no endings and not being able to transition to the next phase of life. This person is over it and is waiting for their contract to end so they can distance themselves from the group, and while they may not have any ill-wishes towards group members per say, their energy is very much giving "ugh, I can't wait till I leave all of this behind". They might be someone who's more impulsive/rebellious and on the untraditional side, or this could point to ideas and visions they want their solo careers to be. They may want to show something new and out of the ordinary from what they couldn't express within the group.

Most of the members have opposite personalities(EX: extroverted/introverted; carefree/careful) no in-between. One thing I also seen was the word 'odd-pairings' I feel we may see a blossoming friendship 2 members that wouldn't normally be thought of or they may come out and annouce they're actually really close with each other and it's a pairing no-one would expect. I also see some members being friends for a very long time after disbandment. These friendships that will last have moreso of a spiritual aspect to them such as them being soulmates so they always got along well or even sharing a past life together that carried over.

Despite all that's being said, they were meant to be together as a group as per the divine set it for their destiny and paths. Hope you guys enjoy!

《WARNING: read at your own discretion》

Now, I saved this for the end of the reading. I do see one member that may be dabbling in some illegal, or rather, unconventional and unethical practices. I dunno which one. This could range from ANYTHING that goes on in backend the industry.

[itsclydebitches]

I kinda wonder, what could bakugou do (hori write bakugou to do) to make him less popular with the "anti" crowd. Like He was a horrid child no doubt and people who try to put blame on Deku or lessen the terrible shit bakugou did aren't great. But as we don't rly see it, we have to assume bakugous behaviour wasn't stopped, we only ever saw his mum "punishing" him when he was being rude after getting kiddnapped. Nothing will excuse what bakugou did, but he has stopped? He's overall a harsh person but he's not harrassing and bullying people anymore, specifically not deku, he's trying to attone for what he did to deku and has now apologised for it. His behaviour was never viewed as justified or good in the series, he's a scary figure in middle school, we're not meant to like his behaviour, so the series itself hasn't justified his actions.

As someone who relate to both bakugou and deku more than I'd like to admit (never told someone to jump tho, that's fucked lol) so I can 100% understand not liking or even hating bakugou but as someone who's not 15 anymore, looking back I also made a lot of really shitty decisions and like bakugou have tried to make up for it, and like deku I was 'friends' with people who hurt me.

Is there anything he can do for the "antis" to just dislike him rather that be "anti"?

(I'm very sorry if you've talked about this somewhere, you can just tell me to look for it if you have, I'll continue to look for your posts on the subject)

Hey there, anon! I think I’ve spoken about this only tangentially and/or in my main Bakugo meta, which is too big for anyone sane to read. So yeah, let’s chat here!

For me personally—and that’s all I can ever do: speak personally. I think it’s important to keep in mind that there is no single solution to please the “anti” crowd. Each fan will be looking for something slightly different in Bakugo’s character, much of which might contradict what a “stan” is currently enjoying. Given how charged a character he is, I'm not sure it's possible to get the entire fandom to like him—what I’m looking for hinges on having a different reading of the story than you seem to. Meaning, I think the series does justify his behavior. Not in any overt, super obvious way like having all the characters go, “Wow, Bakugo! I sure do love how you threaten people all the time. That’s super cool and heroic!” Things are rarely that straightforward. Rather, it’s in a more subtle, but consistent manner that paints a rather conclusive picture across hundreds of chapters.

Simply put, Bakugo is continually rewarded for his actions. Or, if not outright rewarded, his actions are ignored in a way that implies silent acceptance. Characters may not always like what he does... but they're willing to let it slide because Bakugo's heroism was always treated as a given, not something he had to earn and prove.

With the ever necessary disclaimer that I’m not fully caught up yet, here’s a list of some of the things that stood out to me in the first half of the series:

Bakugo’s bullying made him the most popular kid in school.

Bakugo’s bullying was ignored by/outright supported by the teachers.

Bakugo’s bullying did not hinder him from getting into U.A., one of the most prestigious hero schools around.

Despite acting horribly throughout his time at U.A. too, this behavior was continually ignored by the teachers and other authority figures around him.

Bakugo’s struggle to realize that other people aren’t “trash” doesn’t hurt his achievements in any way. He still gets top scores, still wins the tournament, etc.

Bakugo’s behavior gets him special attention from All Might, the greatest hero and Bakugo’s personal idol.

His behavior doesn’t make others dislike him in any manner that’s taken seriously. Everybody is still willing to not just put up with Bakugo, but—in time—start treating his behavior as a quirk (no pun intended lol) that they’re secretly fond of, rather than something he should legitimately be striving to change. Kirishima is the most overt example of this.

This is compounded by his behavior constantly being framed as humorous. Much like with Mineta’s perverted actions, characters might superficially go, “No, that’s bad!” but the story never demands any significant development because then we’d lose the “joke” of Bakugo screaming in rage at the slightest inconvenience, threatening to murder someone over nothing, constantly belittling everyone around him in a “funny” manner, etc. When fans talk about development of a manga character as archetypal and extreme as Bakugo, most don’t really want to see significant change to his base personality. Because then that would result in someone who doesn’t look like the “real” Bakugo: someone nicer, more even-tempered, more mature, etc. But for those of us who were never drawn to that personality in the first place, the continued acceptance of his rude, egotistical, and violent behavior is discomforting. The easiest comparison I can draw is between this and Bakugo’s mother slapping him. That slap is meant to be another “joke”—we see it constantly in shonen anime, something "humorous" you shouldn’t take too seriously because haha, it's just an overprotective mother—but many fans do take it seriously, using it as the basis for a whole “Bakugo was abused and this explains his behavior” reading. Well, I take the “joke” of Bakugo’s threats and insults seriously, especially in a story that starts with something like telling Izuku to jump off the roof. In the same way that many fans want others to treat Bakugo’s mother as a serious topic that has had a negative influence on his development, I want the series to take Bakugo’s everyday actions seriously as a negative influence on… well, everyone around him. But it doesn’t. His base personality is grudgingly adored.

The above two points are seen most overtly in Izuku, who never wavers in his respect for Bakugo despite how Bakugo treats him. Not just prior to U.A., but during their training too. Izuku, as the protagonist, is the emotional heart of this tale, so when he talks about how inspiring Bakugo is, it encourages the reader to see his behavior as inspiring too. Rather than, as said, something that needs to change. Izuku's continued friendship with Bakugo, his adoration of him, and his acceptance of the way he's treated has severely warped how the entire story sees Bakugo's actions. After all, if #pure Izuku can see the good in Bakugo, why can't everyone else? He must not be that bad after all.

I could get into detailed analyses of all the above—like how Bakugo was the one comforted after attacking Izuku outside the dorms at night and how the messed up relationship he has with Izuku is upheld as something to nurture; how the remedial courses he had to take were made to be rather silly, thereby undermining their supposed importance to his development; how Bakugo’s kidnapping had nothing to do with his flaws, but much of the fandom uses it as a way to dismiss any appropriate consequences because, “Hasn’t he suffered enough?” etc.—but in the interest of keeping this within a readable length, I’ll leave it at that. The point is that Bakugo has always been privileged when it comes to his behavior, resulting in others either outright praising it, ignoring it, or demanding that he change a miniscule bit, which always keeps him far below the standards of both his peers and the expectations of a hero. Everyone in 1-A must learn to be even better than the good people they already are... Bakugo needs to learn that other people aren't dirt at the bottom of his shoes. It's never been a particularly impressive development when pit against the rest of the class. All of which can make something like an apology feel pretty hollow. Yes, he’s apologized and I say with all seriousness that that’s great! But how does that apology stack up against 300+ chapters of content? As Bakugo’s words highlight, he's been a really awful person up "until now": he was consumed by Izuku being “miles ahead of [him],” he “looked down on [him]” because he didn’t have a quirk, he “didn’t want to recognize that,” he “hated that,” “grew distant,” “tried to beat you down,” “opposed you and tried to show my superiority over you,” and ends it all with, “it probably doesn’t mean anything telling you all this” before finally getting to the “I’m sorry.” This is basically a laundry list of how horrible a person Bakugo has been for the entire series, with an acknowledgement that this apology is coming really, really late. This is the moment where I could START to like Bakugo, depending on how he acts form here on out, but that pivotal moment arrived after six years of content and in the final arc of the story. It’s too late. Bakugo needed this kind of self-reflection and positive action 250+ chapters ago so he could (hopefully) grow into a better person across the story, not at the story's end. What we got instead is 322 chapters of him being a really horrible person, but the story going out of its way to excuse or even praise that behavior the majority of the time.

As a quick comparison to end on, I think what Bakugo needed was what Soo Jin got in True Beauty. You don’t need to have seen the drama to follow along. The tl;dr is that she has a lot of the core qualities of Bakugo: an all-consuming drive to win that was created due to abusive parents with high expectations, resulting in her bullying a peer to a pretty horrific extent. The difference between them is how the story frames their actions. When Soo Jin becomes the bully she loses everything. Rather than succeeding academically, her grades plummet, making it clear that this anxiety and self-doubt (things the fandom keeps insisting Bakugo is struggling with, but that rarely ever show up in the text) is actually impacting her day-to-day life. Her best friend drops her because she’s not going to support her choices. The boy she likes rejects her. She’s eventually forced to start over somewhere new - which importantly separates her from the girl she was bullying - and get some distance from her parents, resulting in the growth needed to become a healthier, happier, good person again. So when Soo Jin apologizes to the girl she hurt, it feels earned. The story continually recognized how horrific her actions were and put her into a place where she either had to change, or continue losing at everything else that was important to her. Bakugo? Bakugo doesn’t lose. Oh, he claims he does because he’s comparing himself to Izuku constantly, but that’s just him thinking in extremes. He still wins academically. Still wins many battles. Still wins at having friends. Still wins by maintaining the prestige of being a U.A. student. Still wins by getting All Might’s attention. Still wins by receiving Izuku’s respect and an agreement to maintain this rivalry that Bakugo is so obsessed with. Bakugo comes out well 99% of the time, he just thinks he's "lost" because he can't stand not being the absolute best.

For me, the story needed to have Bakugo face consequences for his behavior, not receive rewards and/or have others ignore it, and that revelation/apology needed to come way, way sooner. For me the issue is not a specific action that Horikoshi can have Bakugo do in the next chapter and them bam, I like him now. The problem is Bakugo’s entire concept, how he’s received by the entire cast, and his run across this entire series. "Entire" is the key word there. Which is why the “But he’s apologized. What more do you antis want?” reactions don’t sit well. What we wanted is a better written redemption arc across those 300+ chapters, not a single scene that’s meant to have us forget all the other problems inherent in the story. At this point it’s a far more complicated situation than, “Bakugo just needs to do X, Y, and Z and then we’re golden.” At the end of the day, Horikoshi failed to make me like him as a person and I’m pretty sure he isn’t going to change Bakugo enough to make him likable to me. Bakugo was never the sort of character I’d be inclined towards without a serious, nuanced redemption arc, but sadly, a core, crucial part of that redemption arc took six years to arrive. At this point there’s no way to change the problems in Bakugo’s writing for that huge chunk of the series and not enough time left in the series, it seems, to do the work we should have seen across the entire run. Honestly, idk if the Bakugo we'll get going forward is someone I can just dislike as opposed to being really uncomfortable with, but my money is on there being too little story left and too much investment in upholding Bakugo's base personality for that to happen. I could absolutely be proven wrong! But I think the problems are structural and needed to be better dealt with from page one, not hastily patched over in the final hour.

[marmolita]

okay @thekookster wanted this sidnate texting failfic, so here it is, in all its dumbass glory 😅

disclaimer: this is really stupid, which is why I am not posting it on ao3 where other people will see it lmao

*

[Sid] come on, Nate, now you're taking this joke too far

[Nate] who said it was a joke

[Sid] ha ha very funny

[Sid] you joked the same way with Drouin in juniors, I've seen that tweet about Valentine's day

[Nate] yeah, Jo and I went out for sushi on Valentine's day

[Sid] right, like I said

[Nate] wait what do you think happened after we went out to dinner?

[Sid] you went home?

[Nate] we made out in my car for an hour until it was too close to Jo's curfew

[Nate] it was a date

[Nate] he was my boyfriend

[Sid] uh huh, sure

[Nate] do you seriously not believe me

[Nate] I thought everyone knew about me and Jo

[Nate] here ask him yourself [attachment: contact card for Jonathan Drouin]

[Nate] I can't believe you need to ask my ex boyfriend for verification that he's my ex boyfriend

[Nate] what the fuck Sid

*

[Unknown Number] hey Drouin it's Sidney Crosby, Nate gave me your number

[Crosby] sorry if this is a super weird question but that thing about you and Nate in juniors, that was a joke right?

[Jo] hi

[Jo] what thing?

[Crosby] the thing about being each other's Valentines and stuff

[Crosby] was that real?

[Jo] yes?

[Crosby] I mean

[Crosby] were you and Nate actually dating?

[Jo] yes??

[Jo] why are you asking me about this instead of him

[Jo] are you jealous or something? I haven't been with him in years, he's all yours, I won't steal him back

[Crosby] are you fucking with me right now

[Jo] Nate's the one who wants to fuck you, not me

[Jo] you do have a nice ass though

[Jo] you can tell him I said that you have a better ass than him

*

[Jo] Crosby has a better ass than you

[Jo] I told him to tell you but he probably won't

[Nate] fuck you

[Nate] my ass is great

[Nate] but you're right Sid's is better

[Nate] you told him we dated right

[Jo] yeah, had you not told him before?

[Nate] I thought he knew!

[Nate] he's being a dumbass

[Jo] you probably broke his brain telling the whole world how big your heart eyes are

[Jo] as if we didn't already know

[Nate] that's the thing though

[Nate] he thinks I'm joking

[Jo] ???

[Jo] 😂

[Jo] when are you seeing him again?

[Nate] we don't have any more games against each other this season

[Jo] damn i was gonna say you should just kiss him, then he'll get it

[Jo] but at least call him or something

[Jo] don't just text him a thousand heart emojis

[Nate] I don't text him a thousand heart emojis

[Jo] maybe you should

[Nate] maybe you should mind your own business

[Jo] you made it my business when you gave Crosby my number

[Jo] and you made it the world's business when you let the NHL film you writing "I❤️ Sid"

[read 8:37pm]

*

[Nate] I know you talked to Jo

[Nate] he texted me to make fun of my ass

[Nate] so thanks for that

[Sid] you and him actually dated eh?

[Nate] yeah we did

[Sid] I didn't know

[Sid] that you and him, you know

[Sid] that you were into guys

[Nate] …….

[Nate] Sid.

[Sid] how was I supposed to know? it's not like you ever said anything

[Incoming call from Nathan MacKinnon]

*

"You fucking dumbass!" Nate's voice is loud enough that Sid pulls the phone away from his ear. "That's the most, like-- heteronormative thing! I never made a secret out of being bi, I talk about how hot my team captain is all the time, my relationship with Jo was as public as it gets, and I have been flirting with you for years!"

Sid blinks at the phone. "Hetero-what now?"

"Heteronormative? Is that a word? I thought it was a word. Like, you assumed I was straight so much that you thought everything I said was a joke! I'm not straight! Holy shit, are you? Is that why you never said anything? Because I was pretty sure you weren't straight and you just weren't interested but oh god if I was wrong please just kill me now, don't let me embarrass myself anymore."

Sid has had a lot of practice staying cool under pressure over the years, but somehow now his heart is racing. The thought that Nate has been-- that Nate's had feelings--

"Sid? Are you there?"

"Yeah, Nate, I'm just-- I didn't-- I didn't know, okay? Jesus Christ, give me a minute." He takes a couple of deep breaths and listens to Nate doing the same on the other end of the line. "I'm not straight," he says eventually, even though it's kind of terrifying every time he's said that out loud in his life.

"Oh thank god," Nate says with a sigh. "Okay, just not interested, I got it, I'll back off."

"No!" Sid exclaims, then smacks himself in the face with his palm. "I mean. I'm not straight but I thought you were. If I knew you weren't, I would've-- I mean, when you-- Do you really--?"

"Yeah, Sid, I really. Do you maybe-- Do you want to go out with me, sometime?"

"Like a date?" Sid asks, proud of himself for keeping his voice steady.

"Like a date," Nate confirms.

"Yeah," Sid says, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smile. "Yeah, I'd like that."

Nate lets out a whoop on the other end of the line, which just makes Sid laugh. "Just wait," Nate says, "I'm gonna boyfriend the hell out of you."

"Give me your best shot," Sid replies with a grin. When he hangs up, he watches the gif again: Nate's grin, his careful writing, the bright, glowing I ❤️ Sid.

[yolkyeomie]

Iced Americano | lee jeno

summary — you don’t even like coffee anymore, so why do you have an iced americano in your hands now?

word count — 2k words

pairing — jeno x gender neutral!reader

genre — coffee shop + college au, my sad attempt at humor but really it’s just me kinda losing my mind in the middle of writing this

disclaimer — this was originally made for a close friend of mine so reader is heavily based off of her! also ignore any and all typos thank you

You'd like to say you’re rather good at talking to people

Sure you may have a rather small friend group, but still

The size of your friend group doesn’t equate to how good at socializing you are

Besides !!!

Everyone finds it really easy to approach you and you're really kind back to them !!

That is if they come to you with the right attitude

So it’s not hard to say you’re known very well throughout the campus of ur university

I mean you’re not like POPULAR POPULAR but you’re nice attitude makes people just gravitate towards you a lot

And you liked that!! The attention made you feel validated and loved

was today one of those days where everyone is just super nice to you?

Yeah !!

haha no it wasn’t really

you tolerate a lot of stuff okay

You juggle a lot of responsibilities on your back while still trying to keep in touch with your friends so they don’t feel like you’ve abandoned them or something

but it was REALLY hard tryna keep up with everything

especially when your close friend group was full of boys who didn’t know the exact meaning of organization

trying to keep them situated before they went and burned themselves out was HARD

and then trying to manage yourself at the same time??

sometimes you were ready to throw yourself off the top of fifty story building

and unfortunately for you

today was just one of those days

thankfully it wasn’t because your friends are a genuine mess but

Uni is HARD

as a college student you must put up with a lot of… stuff

I mean some professors can be,,,,, UNKIND to say the least

But usually they were rather lenient and understanding !!

Except for this one. professor.

They always seemed like they were on the verge of losing their mind

And toda must have been the perfect day for them to do that

because your professors summoned the LITERAL devil from within to torture everyon in your clas

But especially you

so let’s just say you’ve been scolded a lot and given wayyyy too much work for no absolute reason

you’re about this close to bashing your head against the wall but you gotta hang on

YOU'RE NOT IN COLLEGE FOR NOTHING AFTER ALL!!!

so you find yourself absently complaining about how much work you have to do today and your friends are like

“That’s tough,,, I’m so sorry [y/n]”

what else can they say really??? they aren’t in your major and they can’t really understand your struggles even tho they wish they could

Well scratch that

they don’t want to understand because that’s ANOTHER work load of information that would constantly be rattling in their heads

Haechan had decided to become a computer engineer when he decided to pick up a major, so his brain was just always fried

Jisung was still trying decide what he wanted to go into and chenle was very serious about becoming a business just so he could accumulate as much money as he possibly could

You always forget what Jaemin had decided to major in, but it wasn’t very interesting to you in the first place

And renjun had decided to major in some form of art, the easier out the four majors mentioned before

Or at least you thought they were easy

Either way TRUST AND BELIEVE if jaemin knew just a little about your major and was able to witness the unfairness in front of him

he’d probably get expelled

anyways renjun had noticed you just getting ready to cry in the corner about how overworked you were

and for once in his life decided to try and help out, not with work tho

why would he ever help with work

“do you want something to eat??? Maybe drink??? I know this place near us that we can go to”

“Thank you so much I’d love to eat and drink and pass out and do nothing about this work when I get home”

yes that’s exactly what you wanted to and nothing was about to stop you

anyways you two were hanging out with each other either way, so it worked very well in ur opinion

You walking down this street towards some restaurants and stores while you were chatting

trying to decide where you wanted to settle down and rest like renjun has suggested

but you uh

notice something strange

you’re passing all the places you usually like to eat at because

renjun kept saying no?

he didn’t want to go to ANY of your usual hangout spots?????

WHY IS RENJUN PASSING ALL YOUR HANGOUT SPOTS??

They were hangout spots for REASON.

good atmosphere, good food, nice people??? they’reperfect !!

so why was he declining every single one of them???

“Hey renjun,,,, where are we going”

“?? To get something to eat and drink??????”

“No like WHERE ARE WE GOING?????”

“TO GET SOMETHING TO EAT AND DRINK WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN???????????”

you two started getting into a small argument, you being annoyed that he was declining every suggestion you through and him being annoyed that you kept question his choices

that was, until he finally stopped

“Oh perfect!! we’re here!!”

You turned to look at him and find that he’s standing in front,,,

,,,, a coffee shop

COFFEE shop????

you’re more of a SODA WATER TEA JUICE ANYTHING BUT COFFEE PERSON

well your parents drink coffee and all no doubt

and when you were a kid you used to drink coffee ALL OF THE TIME

you always had to get your own cup because you’d drink all of your parents’ under ten mins

but uh as you got older

it started to taste

worst?

you started to lose the taste for coffee as you got older and it was just downhill from there

*one sip* “THATSHS HORRIAVKE”

it really surprised your parents

and jaemin

but no one ever wants to drink jaemin’s coffee

please you watched renjun and haechan almost DIE from drinking it, coffee and choking and everything

when jaemin asked jisung to try it as a joke he bursted into tears

when chenle was presented the opportunity he cash apped him money and ran for it

please you almost PUNCHED jaemin for even thinking of making you try it

maybe it’s partly jaemin’s fault you can’t drink coffee anymore

“renjun uh,,,,, I don’t want coffee,,,?? You know I don’t drink that stuff. do they have like anything but that”

“yeah they have coffee coffee and coffee”

“literally,,, you’re the worst”

“No thanks :D”

yeah so you got dragged into the coffee shop

it wasn’t vsco girl Starbucks level inside

it was really small

only a couple of tables scattered about with white cloth covering them and little lights strung up along the walls to make the ambience of the room nice and cozy

There was a small chalkboard menu on the counter as well, with the day’s special and little drawings of flowers and animals around the words.

it was really cute you can’t lie

There was an even larger menu behind the really cute cashier at the cash register that detailed all of the drinks they sold as well

there was also— wait what

back track back track THERE'S A REALLY CUTE CASHIER AT THE CASH REGISTER

PAUSE BECAUSE YOU'RE ENTIRE BODY F R O Z E ON THE SPOT

“[y/n] you there”

“[y/n]?”

“[y/n] move you're blocking the door”

listen you’re not HORRIBLE at communication, it was definitely one of your strong suits in life

But this???

You were practically malfunctioning at this point

seriously you felt like you were in a romance show

you made eye contact with him and nearly tripped over your own two feet

how did you fall so head over heels for this guy so quickly???? He hadn’t even said a WORD

“Can I take your order?”

“Can you what?”

oh god oh god OH GOD HES TALKING TO YOU

wait he’s supposed to do that it’s his job

your eyes looked down towards the name tag pinned onto the apron he wore

lee jeno

wow… you could say his name for hours and never get tired of it

renjun is just kinda,,,, staring at you to get a move on

oh no did he already order

DID HE ALREADY ORDER WHILE YOU WERE ZONING OUT

NO YOU ARE NOT READY WAIT

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?? YOU DONT EVEN LIKE COFFEE

“excuse me? are you ready to order?”

he gave you an amused smile and god it felt like the sun was shining down on you

Jeno was getting more ethereal with every word that came out of his mouth

but you couldn’t keep him waiting you were embarrassing yourself

you stared at the board above him and just blurted out whatever you saw first

“I-I I’ll have a uh iced americano…”

What's even in americanos?????

you hoped it wasn’t gross,,,

if it was it would REALLY awkward having to ask for a bunch of sugar packets to sweeten it

but then jeno smiled at you

“okay! can I have your name please?”

“,,, uh [y/n]”

“[y/n].... what a pretty name for a pretty person”

please god you are about to explode

HE CALLED YOUR NAME PRETTY AND YOU P R E T T Y AT THE SAME TIME??

anyways you’re losing your mind if you can’t tell

and renjun thinks your brain might be on emergency mode right now

and that’s not what youneed is it now?

so he decided to save you the embarrassment and pay for the drinks himself and push you towards one of the tables

you’re seated away from jeno so that you don’t melt into a little puddle if he catches you staring

which you did a lot more then you’d like to admit

“okay so he’s definitely flirting with you”

“AND THAT'S SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER???”

“uh yeah? you’re supposed to feel better after knowing someone is genuinely flirting with you”

“RENJUN.”

you love renjun but rn you wanna punch him because HNG YOU DON'T KNOW BOW TO HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW

“please let’s not think about this right—“

“He’s staring at you”

“He’s WHAT”

please renjun is laughing so hard this is incredibly funny to you

no he wasn’t looking at you he was making someone’s coffee

perhaps your coffee???

or whatever the HELL renjun has ordered

but you saw jeno stop for a moment and glance at you

and the minute he realized you were looking at him too he started BEAMING

LIKE HE WAS OUTSHINING THE SUN

“RENJUN RENJUN RENJUN RENJUN—“

“I’m right here calm down”

“Miss [y/n]?”

PAUSE PAUSE PAUSE

your name sounds really nice coming from him

how did you not notice that before !!!!

“[y/n] your Americano“

“RIGHT”

you move like a robot over to jeno

are you so nervous???? AND YOU'LL PROBABLY NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN

UGH LIFE IS CRUEL

He’s all smiley and giving you the SWEETEST SMILE and jeno’s like “your americano !! I hope you enjoy it, I made it with a lot of love !!

someone send help right now

he made yours with a lot of LOVE

“ ahh !! Thank you!!!”

“I advise you to not drink americanos tho,,, they don’t suit you”

???? what does that mean

“You should try our caffe mocha, it’s sweeter than what you’re drinking now. Just like you !! I’m jeno btw”

YOU SLY BASTARD

I c what u did there

“AHHHHHH THANKS ??? I UH IM [Y/N] NICE TO MEET YOU”

you’re so stupid he already knows your name

well you already know his name you were staring at his name tag

but you’re having a sensory overload so it’s okay

renjun snickers from the back, tho highkey realizing he hasn’t received HIS DRINK YET AND MIGHT THROW A FIT

though eventually he got his drink so he was happy then, tho still a little annoyed with how love struck you were with jeno

you did have to drag him out of the coffee shop because he was going to make a complaint flirting cuz he was getting tired of it

oh and you?

After a few (many) visits you can say you definitely like caffe mochas now

but you did keep getting iced americanos every time you visited

the sweet boy who makes them the drinks always makes yours with lots of love

[nightshade-minho]

don't you think its funny that Tumblr smut writers (smut writers in general) are like 'this works going to have a breeding tag because omg its so hotttttt' but also a typical 'wrap it before you tap it' disclaimer, lol. I'm starting to think some of these people want the ross of getting pregnant ;) (I'm joking oh my god please don't not take me seriously, this is meant to be a simple joke. everyone just reads too much into what I say sometimes and I hate it)

Lmaoo most of my works have unprotected sex warnings, mostly because I have a huge creampie kink. 😳 But yeah, smut isn't equivalent to sex education so I hope people remember that it's super important to practice safe sex in real life! That's low-key why I'm iffy about minors reading my works, I really hope they understand that this is essentially porn and is heavily based off of fantasy. Sex irl is so much more awkward and won't be perfect or fairytale-like. Lmao.