#disclaimer: is it a Romantic relationship? FUCK IF WE KNOW

[cazshmere]

Astrology Observations Pt. 8 🦂

materialist🔖

DISCLAIMER: These are just my personal observations and are meant for entertainment purposes only; it may not resonate with everyone due to the nuances of astrology. Please respect my work and avoid copying or stealing it. Enjoy reading!! 🦂

🦂 I think people who have their chiron in the 3rd/7th or 11th house may experience significant insecurity about posting on social media and being in front of a camera, or even commenting under various posts online. They often overthink the things they put out online/the things they were going to post online 😭 and also if they post pictures/videos they might rewatch the picture/video 984726261 times and often find a SOME tiny fault and convince themselves to delete whatever it is that they have posted. This placement can create a deep-seated fear of judgment and a tendency to second-guess every public interaction

🦂I have noticed that scorpio moons and capricorn moons have very involved and critical mothers/parents, exhibiting behaviors typical of helicopter parenting. For instance they could micromanage every single thing you do or have some sort of comment to make about every little thing you do (also applicable to aries and virgo moons). I also feel that cappy and scorpio moons may find it the hardest to detach from their generational trauma because their parents may have instilled strict principles/beliefs into them and they end up carrying forward all these beliefs which in return makes them more susceptible to repeating toxic patterns which then ends up causing A LOT of trauma to these individuals ❤️‍🩹

🦂 honestly taurus placements aren’t always mindful and demure, despite being ruled by venus. Most taurus placements (esp sun,moon and mars) are NOT afraid to call people out on their bs and are extremely straightforward and direct. The type to insult you straight to your face if you annoy them or smtg 😭 and you’d be like ouch, what was the reason for that??💀. They can come across as arrogant and rude sometimes BUT this all makes a lot of sense as a lot of them tend to be sidereal aries placements after all🙏😂

🦂 speaking of sidereal placements I wanna talk about how virgos can be super playful and child-like (esp with the people they are comfortable with) because they’re leo placements in sidereal + virgo placements also really crave attention, sometimes way more than Leo’s tbh✨

🦂 aries and scorp moon/venus women often attract guys who initially start off as wanting to be/being their “friends” BUT the only reason they wanted to be their friend in the first place is because they see potential for a romantic/sexual relationship with them. It’s sad because literally every guy friend you have/had TOTALLY had other intentions that weren’t platonic 🥲

🦂 having placements in the 2nd house (esp if there are no harsh aspects) just mellows down the intensity of the placement. For instance moon in the 2nd house people can regulate their emotions much more stable and easy manner. Having placements in the 2nd house is such a BLESSING.

🦂 if you think you know someone with a scorpio moon, moon in the 8th house or moon-pluto native, trust me you DON’T😭. no one will ever KNOW every single part of them. They remind me of onions yk? SO MANY LAYERS to them and no one will ever truly know everything about them

🦂 also idk if I’ve mentioned this before but CAN WE JUST TAKE A MINUTE TO APPRECIATE HOW FUCKING FUNNY/HUMOROUS CANCER PLACEMENTS ARE???? literally SO SO witty and make you laugh till your stomach hurts😭🫶🏻

🦂 with age, saturn in cancer natives can look a lot like their mothers 💗

🦂 shadow traits are often expressed through the moon and mars, as these planets govern our raw emotions and drives. For example, an aries moon’s may react with impulsive outbursts and frustration, while a scorpio mars might exhibit controlling, obsessive, or manipulative behaviors to maintain power. These primal reactions tend to surface under stress or vulnerability. To work on your shadow self, it's helpful to focus on your Moon and Mars placements, as these often reveal where you're repeating or expressing toxic behaviors. By understanding how these signs influence your emotional reactions and drive, you can better recognize and address patterns that need healing.

banner/pic credits to the rightful owners

© cazshmere 2024 [All Rights Reserved]

[borathae]

Boyfriends? | JJK x MYG

“Yoongi doesn’t do labels, while Jungkook loves labels. So one night, he asks Yoongi ‘what are we?’, hoping that the last four years together weren’t just casual for him.”

Pairing: Vampire!Yoongi x Vampire!Jungkook

Genre: established relationship!AU, Fluff, Slice of Life, slight suggestive themes

Warnings: just some anxious thoughts, this is a post sex cuddles scene, Koo being a little brat, Yoongi being a fond brat tamer, he tickles him hehe, snuggles & kisses, also! mention of blood drinking as part of his training to become a good vampire <3

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction based on an alternative fictional universe and does not correlate with any real life people. I do not support the shipping of the actual members.

Wordcount: 1.7k

a/n: i love sanguis!yoonkook so much :( omfg this hurt me because i just love them so much and my heart exploded :( istfg this break was so good for me, i have so many new ideas already heheh i can't wait to bring a very lore-y multi chaptered fic very soon hoohoh <3 but for now enjoy this lil yoonkoo fluff <3 also! whenever i write something for them just know that i am channeling hyyh!yoonkook 💔

Yoongi doesn’t define his sexuality. Neither his romantic attraction. He thinks that it is a rather stupid thing to do. He never truly understood the appeal of it nor felt it necessary to do.

“Why should I put a label on myself just so other people are satisfied?”

Because that is what it is for him. Satisfaction of other people. He should put himself into a box just so they can sleep better at night. Well, fuck them. Yoongi is way too old to live for strangers. He knows what he likes and other people can get fucked. They’ll find out who he likes when he allows it.

Jungkook defines his sexuality. And his romantic attraction. For most of his life, he felt like he didn’t belong. Into society, into groups, into life. So learning control and finally being able to be part of something again, Jungkook also feels it important to define who he is.

“I can finally be part of a group. I’m so happy.”

Because that’s what he is these days. Happy. A very happy bisexual man who doesn’t care about the gender of his lovers and who falls for personality.

And so it happens that “I hate labels”-Yoongi and “I love my label”-Jungkook are dating. At least Jungkook thinks that they are. They never really defined it – put a label on it so to speak.

But it must be that they are dating. After all, they are sharing a blanket as they are relaxing in front of the fireplace. They each only wear boxers and a tanktop which in itself is such an intimate look to share. The rug under their bodies is soft and heaps of pillows surround them.

Yoongi is using a few of them to keep himself propped up as he writes anecdotes in the book he is reading. Jungkook is lying on his tummy, watching the flames dance. Music is playing. Lofi hip-hop. Sometimes, he feels Yoongi’s fingertips dance down his back. It makes him shiver every time it happens. Jungkook feels exhausted, but he can’t fall asleep.

He flips his head to the other side, looking up at Yoongi.

The latter notices and gives him a glance. He runs his fingers through Jungkook’s hair, making him shudder in a good way.

“How is your head doing?” he asks.

“Heavy.”

“But no pain?”

He shakes it, “no, just so heavy. Hyung, it’s so heavy a-and I’m so tired.”

“Relax, bub. That’s normal.”

Yoongi is Jungkook’s mentor. Before Yoongi, Jungkook was unable to exist within the human world because he would have ripped through anything that breathed. With Yoongi’s help, he learned how to be normal again and because the road to perfection wasn’t finished yet, they used tonight to train.

“You are ready for the next step in mastering your urges”, Yoongi told him and then monitored Jungkook as he drank from a blood bag filled with human blood.

Up until this point, they merely trained with animal blood. At first Jungkook was very confused, “but I thought that I shouldn’t drink human blood? At all. Never.”

To which Yoongi assured him, “completely staying away from it, will only do the opposite. You need to learn how to handle it, so that if you accidentally drink it, you don’t become violent.”

With Yoongi’s reassurance, Jungkook choked down the blood deliciously and if it wasn’t for the older vampire, he would have lost control.

But he didn’t. Yoongi took his mind off of it in the typical, amazing way Yoongi often takes Jungkook’s mind off the bloodlust. And Jungkook wanted it. It felt so good. Quite frankly, he didn’t want it to stop.

Yoongi pulls his hand back and continues to scribble in his book. Jungkook is thinking. Yoongi calls him bub and bun and Kookie, but does it mean anything? Yoongi allows him to cuddle into him, but does he want the same? Yoongi fucks him, but does the sex even mean anything to him?

It has been two years since the world became peaceful and four years since they met and not once has this relationship been defined. Yoongi doesn’t call Jungkook his boyfriend. He calls him “my boy” or “my Kookie.” But never my boyfriend. What if he is just a good friend to him? What if Yoongi doesn’t want to put a label on them?

“Yoongi?”

“Yes, bub?”

“Are we dating?”

Yoongi lowers the book, “what do you mean?”

“Am I your boyfriend?”

Yoongi widens his eyes, blinking them in confusion.

“Why are you asking that all of a sudden?”

“Just feeling anxious.”

“Jungkookie, hey”, Yoongi softens his voice, “just relax. You’re okay, everything will be okay.”

“Please don’t avoid my question”, Jungkook insists anxiously. Is this it? Four years of intimacy, of building trust and bonding and it never meant the same to Yoongi?

“Of course you’re my boyfriend.”

Jungkook’s chest instantly stops tightening. His body tingles.

“You silly boy, do you seriously think I’m like this with someone I’m not dating?”

“You’re a really kind person.”

Yoongi chuckles, eyes soft in adoration. He pinches Jungkook’s cheek.

“You little bun, that’s not the same.”

“We never made it official.”

“I didn’t think it necessary. I thought it was pretty clear that we are dating once this”, he gestures between them, “became regular.”

“I guess, but I was thinking. About labels and how you hate them and yeah. I got scared that we aren’t official for you.”

“We are.” Yoongi pushes the pillows aside and lies down to face Jungkook. He tugs a strand of hair behind his ear. “If I’m not showing it enough for you, you have to tell me. I’m not good with reading signs or getting hidden messages. You gotta tell me directly what you want.”

“I know.”

“So? Do you want me to show it more?”

“No, you’re showing me that you love me. I think I just needed to hear it tonight.”

“I understand. You can tell me if you need that. You know me, I’m not gonna recite love poems to you on my own.”

Jungkook chuckles, “I know you, hyung. I think it’s cute.”

Yoongi grimaces. “If you say so.”

“I do. You are so cute.”

Yoongi chuckles, “you’re aware that I rearranged your insides just moments prior?”

“I know.” Jungkook closes his eyes and settles into the pillow. “Only cute people can do that.”

Yoongi laughs, “okay, okay you’re being an idiot. I get it”, he says, leaning in to kiss the shell of Jungkook’s ear.

Jungkook relaxes his muscles, enjoying the soft tingles rising all over his skin as Yoongi kisses every inch of his upper back. His face next. Jungkook rolls to his back so Yoongi can reach it better. Their eyes meet. Yoongi cups his cheek and kisses him. Jungkook seriously thinks that it feels so much better now that he knows it’s official. Every second, every moment, every touch exists to strengthen their relationship as boyfriends. Seriously, if Jungkook’s heart was still beating, it would race like crazy.

He giggles. Yoongi smiles.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing. I’m happy.”

Yoongi kisses him with a smile before he begins littering his face with kisses.

“I’m happy too, bub.”

“Oh, Yoongi”, Jungkook lets out and unable to control the surge of happiness, he shoots up to take Yoongi into the tightest hug human- and vampirekind has ever seen.

“Okay. This is happening”, Yoongi chuckles, letting it happen without hugging him back. It’s not because he doesn’t want to, but simply because Jungkook is squeezing his arms against his sides.

“I love you so much”, Jungkook giggles, shaking Yoongi from left and right.

“I love you too, but please stop that”, Yoongi laughs, head thrown back and bouncing around.

“No. You’re my stim toy”, Jungkook says and squeezes him tighter, making a cute sound for it.

“Whatever that is”, Yoongi laughs, taking the squeezing until it starts hurting. Then he begins to fight back. Softly of course, finally using his strength to shove Jungkook’s arms open.

“How are you doing that?” Jungkook gasps, trying with all his might to bear hug Yoongi again, but it is useless.

“I’m the strongest, remember?”

Jungkook’s back hits the rug, his wrists get pinned by one hand. Yoongi looks at him as if he wanted to take him to euphoria and back. Just for a second because then pure mischief burns in his eyes. Jungkook feels said mischief very soon as Yoongi begins tickling his sensitive side.

“No! Stop! Hyung please stop”, Jungkook squeals, laughing so loudly it bounces off the walls. He tries to fight his wrists free, kicking his feet helplessly. But it is useless. Yoongi is stronger and he is hellbent on getting Jungkook back for always being a little brat.

“Hyung I’m sorry”, Jungkook laughs, crying tears.

“Not enough”, Yoongi coos, changing sides.

“Ah! Please I’m gonna pee myself, stop! Please”, Jungkook squeals, laughing oh so much that his mouth truly cannot open any further.

“Mhm, alright”, Yoongi rasps and stops. He lets go of his wrists, sliding his hands to the smallest part of his waist to hold him. Somehow in their tickle match, Yoongi slid between Jungkook’s legs. They are thrown over his lap, resting their weight on him.

Jungkook recovers with little gasps and gulps. The first thing he does is wipe the tears from his blushy cheeks then he pouts at Yoongi.

“This was totally not necessary and very mean.”

Yoongi chuckles, “for all the bratting you did this week? It’s a mild punishment.”

Jungkook pouts harder, “I can’t help it. Besides, you’re too sensitive. I’m not even bratting.”

“Careful”, Yoongi squeezes Jungkook’s waist. The latter squeals and writhes.

“Sorry.”

“Better.” Yoongi smiles, bending down. His hands run along Jungkook’s torso until he has to rest them on each side of his head. “You’re so fucking pliable.”

“Hyung…” Jungkook sighs, melting into a puddle.

Like this. Underneath Yoongi and with his head foggy in feel good emotions, Jungkook gets kissed. He wraps his limbs around Yoongi and deepens the kiss. This might be one of the best nights of his life. He is his boyfriend. And now he is making out with him. This is the best night ever.

[catboy-beckett]

Someone on the Tokyo Debunker subreddit brought up ships for MC (as in, not just the characters players like/are attracted to, but ones we actually think would go well with the protagonist) and I haven't stopped thinking about it. I find it an interesting question, because my preferences for myself are pretty noticeably different from who I think she would like! So here are my compatibility assessments!

Disclaimer: I have only played through most episodes once, so my memory of TDB lore may be lacking in certain areas. I also have not completed all affinity stories and have not spoiled myself on them. Also note I will be using "you"/"me"/"us"/"I"/etc. to refer to MC interchangeably with "MC"/"her" because that's just how I'm used to talking about video game protagonists. Spoilers avoided for newest episode but only newest episode.

JABBERWOCK

HARU: I honestly think he is MC's favourite! He's the one she's most often happy to see, and in return he is always grateful for her help. MC seems to volunteer at Jabberwock reasonably often and with little prompting; this isn't necessarily because she's infatuated with Haru, but rather I think it shows they have similar priorities.

REN: He's giving a whole lot of nothing. A lot of the opportunities given to him in-story to bond with her, he outright rejects. He doesn't seem interested in getting into a relationship, or even forming a friendship that could lead to a relationship. I'm all for "enemies to lovers" but you've gotta show the attraction from the beginning! Otherwise it just feels like a shoehorned-in plot twist.

TOWA: Very romantic. Very mysterious. Compelling, and they clearly like each other. My biggest complaint here is that Towa is someone who needs more screentime for an arc. He's not a simple character. I also think MC would be a little afraid of him if it ever really clicks for her what he's capable of. (Both power-level-wise and morals-wise.) I know fans love Towa's yandere tendencies but MC shows no enthusiasm for that type of man.

SINOSTRA

TAIGA: My favourite man! Terrible for MC. She is pretty much trembling in her boots whenever he's around. I can't see a romantic future for them. Taiga's ideal wife is Romeo, and MC just doesn't have the backbone to be Romeo. That said, I think MC having an inconvenient physical attraction to Taiga would be narratively interesting (and fuckin' hot), as who doesn't love the tension between a dangerous violent freak and a shivering field mouse? There are a couple of other points in Taiga's favour too: the fact that he's the ghoul who seems to react to MC's personality the most (he's always noticing how timid she is and seems to find that cute/attractive) and the fact that he eats anomalies (😳) set him apart from most other love interests. Taiga is down to fuck but he's not really a viable option to date.

ROMEO: This might be controversial but I think Romeo is one of those ghouls who has his own love interest, and it isn't you. I'm not even sure he likes women. I've never once felt like Romeo had an interest in my character and the only time he flirted with us was to make Kaito jealous. Honestly that felt more like ship teasing between him and Kaito if anything. As for how MC feels about him, I think she's about as intimidated by him as she is by Taiga, though it's slightly easier to get Romeo to Not Murder You than it is Taiga. Romeo can at least be reasoned with.

RITSU: Never shows an ounce of attraction or even warmth. Even when he smiles at someone, it feels more like professional courtesy than a reflection of his feelings. How would someone like Ritsu fall in love? It's a fascinating question, but the game is not yet interested in giving us an answer. He tends to bully MC into doing what he wants just like Romeo does. He uses social pressure rather than violence, which I think she finds preferable to Romeo's method, but not pleasant. There's also the fact that Ritsu is dedicated to becoming Taiga's lawyer, and I honestly think he would continue trying to defend him if MC ever wanted to press charges for, say, the time he shot her, or the time he tried to throw her out of a train. Taiga's romance potential is already shot because of these things; what can we say of someone who would take Taiga's side?

FROSTHEIM

JIN: Oh boy. Okay, this is the "canon" ship. Jin gets all the tropes, all the sparkly panels of heroically rescuing MC, all the jealous NPCs treating MC like she's already his girlfriend, the works. They could not be pushing this any more clearly. And... it's serviceable. It feels a little out of place in a game like this, and maybe that's why I'm not fully on board, but it works when it works. I just think Jin doesn't have enough screentime to really make the "canon bae" thing stick. Does he KNOW how close we've been getting with 20 other ghouls while he's been absent for several chapters in a row? Does he know he's on a 1-year timer for his slow burn bullshit? I like Jin, and he's one of the most shippable-with-MC characters for sure, but I just think it could be better. It should also be noted that MC is scared of Jin in a similar way that she's scared of Taiga or Romeo. I think honestly she would pick one of the men who hasn't threatened her life yet.

TOHMA: Like Romeo, I judge him one of the "does he even like women?"/"I think he's just using me to get to his husband" type ghouls. He has a flirty manner, but he uses it with everyone, so it means nothing to me when he talks to MC with that same expression. That said, he's more of a simp than Romeo, so while I think Romeo wouldn't care if you fucked his husband, I think Tohma wants you to. I think Tohma is into MC in the way that a stalker might be into a pair of dirty socks once worn by their crush. (And, on a less perverted note, he wants MC to pull Jin out of his depression since he realizes he can't do it by himself--especially now that they're fighting.) I don't think Tohma/MC works as a ship unless it's a complicated situationship with Jin.

KAITO: I don't think MC likes Kaito. She might just be very oblivious (very very VERY oblivious), but she's had many opportunities to respond to his advances and she just kind of no-sells them every time. To me, that kills off any possibility of romance. If MC were more of a self-insert avatar for the player, this wouldn't be an issue, as it would be up to the players to decide whether they liked Kaito or not; but TDB MC has her own thoughts and feelings, and we see them frequently during the episode where she meets Kaito, and the lack of reciprocation is deafening. Another, more possibly controversial point: I don't think Kaito likes MC. I think Kaito wants a girlfriend, and he has gotten it in his head that MC Is Girl, Therefore Perfect For Be Girlfriend. He treats her in a way that he's heard you are "supposed to" treat girls. He doesn't even NOTICE her suspicious behaviour when they meet because he's too busy metagaming the situation; he even gets it into his head that she's "nice" while she's lying to him. He never updates this perception of her. There is nothing about the character, or the way that players play the character, that Kaito actually LIKES. He just wants a girl. Any girl. Bad ship.

LUCAS: Another character who never really expresses attraction to the player character or anyone else. MC has a better relationship with him than she does with Kaito; Lucas doesn't freak out or get jealous or play 4D chess trying to get MC to fall in love with him, so MC can speak to him more honestly. That said, I believe Lucas isn't the sort of person to hide his feelings from MC (or even be able to), so I can't help but read his complete lack of flirtation as a lack of interest. I could believe MC has a one-sided crush on Lucas (which would also make for a really funny group dynamic), but that's about a best-case scenario.

HOTARUBI

HAKU: He really is just "the nice, chill guy" of the roster. Normally those don't compel me at all but Haku is really enjoyable. He's also, at unpredictable points, one of the more horny/flirty characters. Definitely has an attraction to MC, which is a big plus. MC never really gets the chance to respond to his advances, which in this type of game is the closest we get to a canonical attraction from her. (Because of course, they don't want to force players into a romance they might not want.) Good ship! Hard to write about or anything considering Haku is such a mysterious character, but I believe the attraction is real and not part of a dastardly plan, at the very least. Haku definitely puts MC at ease and I think she needs that in a partner.

SUBARU: Another "not sure if he even likes women" situation. Subaru doesn't even come close to the way he acts around Sho, when he's around MC. Subaru is a very cute-and-flustered-around-crushes type, and I think if he were into MC at all, we would see it. I think MC likes Subaru okay as a person but that's it.

ZENJI: This is going to be my most subjective one yet, I think. Zenji is very in his own head. What do I mean by that? I think he would compose seven love ballads for MC and none of them would really be for her. I think he's more attached to the artistic value of love than the feelings themselves. This harms his compatibility with anyone, MC included. As for MC, she actually seems to like Zenji more than the average person does! Or at least more than Haku does. Haku seems to mostly tolerate Zenji, while MC shows enthusiasm for his art in campus stories. Note: this ship becomes untenable in the event that Jiro demonstrates feelings for MC, as I don't think Zenji would compete with him.

MORTKRANKEN JIRO: Does not demonstrate feelings for MC. There are crumbs there, but you have to squint and squeeze to make a ship out of them. I could see MC being attracted to tall, gentle, reliable men, especially ones who made her feel secure during a difficult time in her life... but all we know for sure is that she didn't want to watch him undress for the bath.

YURI: I can see this guy as being the #1 strangest relationship she has with any of the ghouls. At times, he bullies and belittles her, like Ritsu or Romeo or Jin do. Other times, he is working tirelessly to cure her condition and taking the curse more seriously than she's seen anyone else do. He is a very confusingly-supportive love interest. I do not think MC would realistically find romance with him; tsundere that he is, she would need to be more active to really get through to him, and she's a pretty passive person. For Yuri's part, he is embarrassingly infatuated with MC. The man goes beet red when she grabs his hand, for fuck's sake. This is very funny as a one-sided ship and would be equally funny if Yuri decided to actually try confessing, but he is not the best match for MC.

VAGASTROM

ALAN: What do you get when you cross two shy people? Nothing whatsoever, that's what! Alan likes MC but has trouble expressing it and worries about hurting her. MC has a tendency to make herself small and placate people. I'm not sure their relationship can get off the ground in the first place, but if it does, I expect them to have communication issues right away. Mutual conflict-avoidance is not a great foundation for a relationship.

LEO: A great ship for MC if you hate her. Leo is toxic for anyone, but he openly hates MC and wants to get rid of her. If they get into a relationship, it will be one of those dastardly plans I warned of in the ancient scrolls (Haku's paragraph). Has the potential to be really hot though. I don't think MC hates Leo, but I think she avoids him because he seems to hate her. She could be easily manipulated if Leo is so inclined.

SHO: Viable! Sho has never been anything but nice to MC, and it shows in the way she greets him without hesitation. Sho in turn seems to actually like MC, in contrast to Leo. I can't say whether there's any attraction, but there's mutual trust.

OBSCUARY

RUI: Easily one of the most viable ships! There's the romanticism of their mutual curses (as is immediately pointed out by Rui), Rui's open flirtation with MC, the convenient excuse for why they can never hook up (because as stated before, when the excuse is botched it just makes it look like one or both characters isn't interested), and in addition to all that, Rui is one of the nicest and friendliest characters, which is something MC responds well to.

EDWARD: Definitely also a viable ship. MC isn't as intimidated by Ed as she is by characters like Taiga or Jin or even Yuri. The fact that he can overwrite her curse by making her a vampire adds to the intrigue. Ed is both openly horny for MC and expresses interest in being with her forever. The only potential speedbump here is that MC doesn't seem to consider Ed's offer a significant option; her default fear is still "I'm going to die/become a kyklos" rather than "I will have to become a vampire".

LYCA: Has a little potential, but once again the attraction is lacking. I could see Lyca growing to have feelings for MC over time, but it doesn't seem to be the case yet. MC seems to trust Lyca even if he is capable of violence.

In summary BEST SHIPS FOR MC: Haru, Rui, Ed MOST INTERESTING SHIPS: Yuri, Leo WORST SHIPS FOR MC: Taiga, Romeo

[remuswriting]

TO KNOW EVERY SIDE OF YOU

After a failed Tinder hookup, Atsumu learns that Sakusa has a hot older brother who is now completely uninterested in him. However, that doesn’t stop Atsumu from trying to become part of Y/N’s life.

Or, the one where Atsumu falls in love with Sakusa’s older brother.

PAIRING: Miya Atsumu/Male! Reader

GENRE: Social Media AU; Post-Time Skip; Romance

TAGS: Best Friend's Brother; Age Difference (23 & 27); Angst; Slow Burn; Implied Sexual Content; Self-Destructive Behavior; Messy Characters; Toxic Relationship (for first half)

NOTES: Y/N does date an OC at one point, but there is not a love triangle (he doesn't have romantic feelings for Atsumu when dating the OC). On several occasions, characters will make the comment that Y/N's behavior toward Atsumu is “unfair” but it is not. It's more the concept of the “friendzone.” Everyone is very far from perfect in this story, and there are times where it gets very messy. Just be prepared for that.

DISCLAIMERS: There is not a definitive face claim for Y/N, but I do use some faceless photos. Picture him however you want, the photos are reference essentially. Atsumu has a face claim that I try not to show the face of usually. All photos are from Pinterest.

STATUS: COMPLETED

TAGLIST: Closed

[profiles]

one: code purple

two: daily cat photo

three: hurry, i'm losing air

four: "the usual place"

five: lost part of my sanity

six: does it count?

seven: i say so

eight: three more days

nine: star stickers

ten: you can call me atsumu

eleven: is it okay if i keep them?

twelve: terrible taste in men

thirteen: i know where you live

fourteen: trick questions

fifteen: bring a bowl

sixteen: thank you

seventeen: hate me all you want

eighteen: you're not a bad person

nineteen: my stomach hurts

twenty: just be normal

twenty-one: friends again

twenty-two: hard launch

twenty-three: trying to be supportive

twenty-four: wtf does maim mean?

twenty-five: meet kyo

twenty-six: we're friends

twenty-seven: he misses you

twenty-eight: can you keep a secret?

twenty-nine: rebound

thirty: i can wait

thirty-one: you deserve more than this

thirty-two: what would've happened?

thirty-three: i don't fucking owe you

thirty-four: switching sides

thirty-five: he cares for you

thirty-six: this is unfair

thirty-seven: we don't have time

thirty-eight: me and who?

thirty-nine: why do you care about me?

forty: i believe in you

forty-one: cursing his whole bloodline

forty-two: kfc

forty-three: save me from this madness

forty-four: lying is a criminal offense

forty-five: to spend time with you

forty-six: hesitating

forty-seven: if you protect me

forty-eight: that's his mother

forty-nine: truly a blessing

fifty: gatekeeping

epilogue

special: you're my best friend

[reinanova]

i have a few scenarios for you to consider

~~~

character: “i’m not straight”

fandom*: mmmm but what if you were

~~~

character: is bisexual in the comics

fandom: well, character isn’t explicitly stated to be bi in the movies, therefore character is straight

~~~

writer: yeah character is pan and has a dating history with all genders (and this wasn’t shown bcuz of xyz)

fandom: well, it doesn’t matter what the writer says, character is straight bcuz they’ve only dated the opposite gender on screen

~~~

character: is gay (either implied or explicitly stated to be homosexual and homoromantic)

fandom: well, maybe they’re homosexual but heteroromantic**, therefore i’m only going to ship this character with the opposite gender

~~~

character: is a lesbian

fandom: well, lesbians can still have sex with men therefore i’m going to write f/m smut with this lesbian and a man. not as a “figuring out/exploring my sexuality” fic but just bcuz i can

~~~

queer community: hey this character is canonically queer, could you please be respectful of that?

fandom: how about you go fuck yourselves. this is so embarrassing to be asking for respectful representation, literally shut the fuck up

~~~

character: is canonically gay

fandom: well you can’t prove he’s not attracted to women so he’s straight actually

~~~

disclaimers:

* i’m talking about a fandom as a whole in this post, not a couple individuals who may do this. this is talking about if a large chunk (think half or more) of a fandom is ignoring a canon queer identity

** no hate to someone who may identify this way. if someone is this identity, kudos to them, but people shouldn’t just use this as an excuse to ignore someone’s queer identity

this is how you sound when ignoring aspec*** identities. do you hear how ridiculous this is?

*** aspec (the way i use it at least) includes the asexual spectrum (ace-spec) and aromantic spectrum (aro-spec). also your friendly reminder that people can be aro and not ace and vise versa but you can’t ignore one or the other to suit your fancy

there will probably always be people doing this (re: ignoring canon queer identities) in fandoms, however, not in mainstream and popular ships and not to the extent that aspec identities are erased. bcuz if you have a problem with the above scenarios but not when the character is aspec, an already basically invisible identity, you need to re-examine your thinking and deal with your hypocrisy

do you know how hard it is to prove a LACK of something? even if someone straight up says, “i experience zero sexual or romantic attraction to anyone,” someone else will be like, “well how do you know you just haven’t found the right person yet?”

is the idea that someone doesn’t want a romantic or sexual relationship that difficult to understand?

if you want to see your identity represented in a character headcanon, great! but do so in a way that doesn’t negate another marginalized and underrepresented canon identity

there are SO! MANY! straight characters at your disposal. use one of them for your queer headcanons until we reach the point where your identity is canon. then you’ll probably be fighting for representation the same way i am right now

it also sucks to see fighting within the aspec community. bcuz yes aro and ace identities are a spectrum. however, when there’s a singular character with an aspec identity, you physically cannot showcase that spectrum. so if an ace character is sex-favorable, allos will believe all ace people are sex-favorable and ignore aces who are not. same thing for sex-repulsed aces and so on. the only solution is to fight for more aspec representation so everyone can see themselves in media without sacrificing parts of an aspec identity to fit how you identify

i’m tired. i’m so fucking tired of fighting for an ounce of representation. this should not be an uphill battle for people to accept aspec characters. i shouldn’t have to fight the queer community and straight people for this

[threeacttragedy]

Entry 8: The One About the Adjacent of Convenience

Are you guys ready to return to our regularly scheduled programme?

Actually, I must applaud the majority of the people who read my blog for how well they handled Sunday. It seemed many of you got a good laugh out of it and were then gifted Monday morning with an updated post from that dear restauranteur tossing out Lady Whistledown’s name for – honestly, I don’t know why he threw it out there. Do you?

Moving on…

Yesterday, I discussed Antonia. Today, I am going to venture over to the other side of the fandom and discuss – you guessed it – Jake Dunn.

And, no, I’m not summoning the Balrog today. In fact, I don’t equate Jake to a creature from the depths of Moria because, generally speaking, he doesn’t bother me.

Do I find him a tad annoying? Of course I do. But, only because the perception of his relationship with Nicola has been warped into something ass backwards (no pun intended) to anyone with two bits of common sense, and because he’s always inconveniently there.

At the right time.

For those pap pictures.

However, the rational side of my brain reminds me that if I don’t see anything romantic in Nicola’s relationships with, say, JVN, Mark, Golda, Jack, or either of the Dylans, I shouldn’t be bothered by her relationship with Jake. Would we be paying any attention to Jake if he wasn’t being shoved down our throats by anti-Lukolas? No, probably not.

But, here we are.

I will preface this entry with my belief that Jake did not ask to be linked romantically to Nicola. That was Deux Moi's doing. Keep that in mind as you read through this. Deux Moi created that bullshit plotline and then rabid dogs ran with it.

By the way, those are the people you should be worried about. The ones pushing their “Jakola” narratives with blind aggression. I’m talking about those “in your face” assholes whose real motive behind shipping Nicola with anyone-but-Luke is solely based on their rapid-fire hatred towards Luke. These people are not Jakolas; these people are the Jakholes.

*Oh, now is the time to slip this in… My disclaimer (or, my “ask”) for today is, let’s not pick on the Sincerely Ignorant Jakola shippers. They are just as volatile as the Sincerely Ignorant Lukola shippers. They spiral fast and hard, too. Seriously, don’t fuck with these people, please. I believe most of them to be nice people.

Thank you, next.

I know that some of you will argue that Jake is a manipulative little shit and intentionally tried to make connections between Nicola and himself by way of pictures in her personal spaces and a fucking bucket hat, and that may be true. In fact, I’ve heard this argument from Lukolas that I highly respect. It’s very possible Jake has taken advantage of his friendship with Nicola. I understand the argument behind this theory and, I’ll be honest, it has made me question Jake’s character.

But, that’s not the point I’m trying to make today.

Today, I want to focus on how Jake became an “adjacent of convenience.”

What is that exactly? Well, actually, I just now made that shit up. But, it means he’s an adjacent, not because he’s romantically involved with Nicola, but rather he was in the wrong place at the right time.

It’s funny to me, when you spend some time mapping out all the little nuances that make up the Lukola timeline, that you start seeing a bigger picture.

I do not know who was behind Papsmear. Word on the street is that it was Deux Moi. I don’t know if anyone has ever actually confirmed that so, for now, I can only speculate – and speculate I will!

If you look at events in chronological order, it is interesting that, in July, the day before a video of Luke and Antonia at the GQ dinner hit social media, Deux Moi posted old pictures of Luke and Antonia from, I believe, January. Why? It’s also interesting that the day before People Magazine published the Italy Pap pictures of Luke and Antonia, Deux Moi rehashed Papsmear. Again, why?

Do you see the patterns patterning?

I thought you would.

Then what happened?

Well, “Hot Boy Summer” suddenly came to an abrupt halt with Luke returning to London.

Alone.

Is it odd to you that Luke has not been papped with Antonia since the end of July? Because it’s pretty damn odd to me. Is it possible that Luke and Antonia ceased to be “together” at the end of July? If you have read my previous entry, you already know my opinion on this.

But, dammit, that’s a shame! No more scraps for the paps. How unfortunate for Deux Moi.

Okay, then what?

Well, “Chaos Week” began. We had Nicola posting a shit storm of content starting August 4 with French toast and ending August 16 with “Juna.” We had Wordle. We had Scrabble. We had the “Drink Your Milk” shirt. We had “Bless the Telephone.” We had “very demure, very mindful” (which, in my opinion, was confirming the intent behind “Chaos Week”). Oddly, all these things seemed to weigh heavily in Lukolas’ favor. We could even take it a bit further by including the August 22 “BTS Polin” picture and the August 23 “modern day carriage” story (you know, the picture of Nicola looking oh-so-come-hither-sexy in the back of a car), which was followed up two days later by JVN’s “finger” demo. I mean, the Lukola train was rolling, right?! Fuck, yeah, it was!

But, then it came to a very abrupt stop on August 25 when Deux Moi posted pictures of Nicola hanging out with Jake at a music festival. The narrative being given? Oh, so cozy vibes.

And, that’s the moment Jake became an adjacent of convenience.

Just from being at a concert.

Taking a picture with Nicola.

Before this point, did I know who Jake Dunn was? Yeah, I did. I’d seen – in fact DEUX MOI – post pictures of Nicola and Jake hanging out in a pub together in July. I’ll be honest, I looked Jake up at the time and everything I read about him seemed to point in the exact same direction it points to today – that he’s not romantically involved with Nicola.

In fact, I polled at least two dozen of my fellow Lukolas (with the majority of them being fellow Fact Finders, with a select few being “long haulers”) about whether they’d heard of “Jakolas” before August 25. Their answer was a collective and figuratively loud NO.

What does that say to you? It makes me believe that the Jakolas were born from those festival pictures.

How convenient.

Just a few short weeks after the Antonia/Luke ship (do they even have a name?) hit an iceberg (pun intended), we suddenly have the christening of a new ship. The USS Jakola.

How convenient.

Now, think about every good thing that has come about in the Lukola fandom since the Jakholes were released into the wild.

Every positive has been collectively counteracted with a negative.

Think about the timing of all those pap pictures with Jake.

Think about who is releasing those pap pictures.

Are the patterns starting to pattern in your head?

Think about how much effort Nicola has put into erasing the Jakola narrative.

Think about how little effort Nicola has put into erasing the Lukola narrative.

Think about how much that must piss the fuck out of the Jakholes. And Deux Moi.

Anyone want to go with me to rescue Jake from the USS Jakola? I heard the Jakholes put him in the hull closet.

If you have some hesitation, I suppose I could agree to keep him hostage until we know where his allegiance lies. But I'm thinking he's dying to get off that ship.

[eunxhan]

Ꮺ Anon Requested ⨾ Polyamory/harem relationship with head over heels bottom subs,, one is a cute shy guy who loves m reader so fucking much he doesn't mind getting cucked and stuff as long as it pleases reader,,another one is a hot sexy model who's very proud of his body, always taking care of himself so you'll praise him when you fuck him, taking care of his hair well so you can easily pull them,,, kinky sub who's into wild plays, totally devoted to reader and would do literally anything like damn.. Another cold aloof kind of man,, people are intimidated by him and he's all strong and one man army stuff.. Yet when it comes to reader he's just a mess like damn,, all these pretty, smart, strong subbies also has reader's personal brand on his skin,,, they're so head over heels they do anything for reader's acknowledgement,,,

Ꮺ Eun Replies ⨾ Oh my, It is lovely to see my sweets still active. I have been thinking about this entry the moment I came back in this platform. How I've missed all of you.. I did wrote them separately but I decided to write and post another where they all meet in the future. But anyways, what should we name these three?

•◦✦────•◦ᘡᘞ •◦────✦◦•◦•

Ꮺ Disclaimer — NSFW.

Reader ⨾ MALE. YOU/YOUR.

Words used ⨾ 1578

Links ⨾ My Navigation

•◦✦────•◦ᘡᘞ •◦────✦◦•◦•

Let's say, you're an average guy with a typical 9 to 5 job. You couldn't care less about what anyone has to say or do to you, yet three men managed to catch your interest. One of them being Shy!sub. It's not like you guys have been together since childhood; you only met during middle school.

Shy!sub is incredibly shy and easily embarrassed. He tends to blush a lot, especially around you. Even the slightest touch or intimate gesture from you can make him flush red.

Shy!sub is used to your rantings while playing with him, and sometimes, you being a little shit happens to take your anger out on him during your calls. He never says or complains about it; he just listens or sometimes even apologizes to you.

Shy!sub enjoys playing video games with you, even if he's not very good at them and you call him out for jt. He just finds it relaxing and a great way to bond with you. He often cheers you on during your gaming sessions.

Not only does he enjoys gaming, Shy!sub has a secret love for romantic movies. He often watches them when you're not around, dreaming of the day you and him will have your own romantic story.

Shy!sub looks at you as if he's admiring a piece of art, even if you're just there yelling and getting mad about something ridiculous. You can tell that he wants something else. But if you call him out on something, Shy!sub hates confrontations and avoids them at all costs. He would rather keep the peace than engage in an argument, even if it means holding back his true feelings.

Shy!sub is the type of person who's too soft for people like you to handle. He does your chores because he knows you're exhausted from your job or school, and even cooks for you.

Shy!sub enjoys cooking for you, as he sees it as a way to show his love and care for you. He often tries out new recipes, hoping to impress you with his culinary skills. If you point something out or compliment his cooking, be ready to see him almost everyday in your kitchen.

He acts more like a boyfriend than a best friend. One call of his name, and he's dashing towards you like a loyal dog ready to do what you ask. With him basically living with you, Shy!sub can sleep easily. He is afraid of the dark and often sleeps with a nightlight on. He sometimes asks you to sleep with him when he's feeling particularly scared.

Shy!sub never admits this but he secretly loves it when you get angry, as it shows your passionate side. He often provokes you, hoping to see your fiery temper.

When both of you started to have some intimate moments, Shy!sub got even more embarrassed but he never stops trying to tease you with his every move. He basically lives with you now from how much time he spends with you. Everything escalated quickly when you got home and saw him wearing something he normally doesn't wear.

Shy!sub looks so damn adorable in his light bubblegum pink lingerie, but you decided to keep it in your pants and let him explain what he was doing. You could tell he was about to burst out crying when you walked in on him.

—

Shy!sub's eyes widened as he realized you had caught him in his new attire. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and his heart raced, fearing the worst. The lingerie, a gift from a secret admirer, was supposed to be a surprise for You. But now, with you standing in the doorway, the moment had been ruined.

You, on the other hand, couldn't help but admire the way the lingerie hugged Shy!sub's curves, accentuating his hourglass figure. The sight of Shy!sub in such a delicate and feminine ensemble stirred something deep within you—a desire he had never felt before. But he knew the time was not right to act on it.

"It's... it's for you," Shy!sub managed to stutter, his voice trembling. "I wanted to surprise you. I thought you'd like it."

"Wow, I've never thought I would see this coming from you. Someone who is known to be easily embarrassed over everything." You could see the vulnerability in Shy!sub's eyes as you reply to him. It was a rare sight, and it tugged at your heartstrings. You knew Shy!sub's affections ran deep, and you couldn't bear to see him so distressed. So, with a smile, you stepped forward and gently placed a hand on Shy!sub's cheek.

"You look amazing," You said, his voice soft and reassuring. "And I appreciate the thought. But remember, you don't need to do anything to impress me. I love you just the way you are."

Shy!sub let out a shaky breath, relief washing over him. He leaned into your touch, grateful for your understanding. The moment, though awkward, had brought them closer. From that day on, You began to see Shy!sub in a whole new light. Your words and gentle touch calmed Shy!sub's nerves. The tension in the room shifted, and a new energy filled the space. Shy!sub's heart fluttered as your hand lingered on his cheek, your thumb gently caressing Shy!sub's soft skin.

Emboldened by your acceptance, Shy!sub leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a feather-light kiss. It was a tentative move, a test to gauge your reaction. But you responded with a hunger that surprised them both. Your lips met in a passionate kiss, your tongues dancing and exploring each other's mouths. Shy!sub's hands roamed your body, feeling the contours of your muscles through your shirt. Your hands slid down Shy!sub's back, cupping his rear and pulling him closer.

The lingerie, once a source of embarrassment, now became a symbol of their growing desire. The soft fabric rubbed against your body, igniting a fire within you. Shy!sub could feel your arousal pressing against him, and it sent shivers down his spine. His mind were somewhere else as he softly groans in your ears, his mind tells him to beg you to do something more to him.

You both broke the kiss, panting and flushed. Your eyes were dark with desire, and Shy!sub's lips were swollen from your passionate embrace. The room was filled with a palpable tension, a promise of what was to come.

"Darling," Shy!sub whispered, his voice heavy with need. "I want you. I've always wanted you." he whined at the end. You didn't need to be told twice. You scooped Shy!sub into your arms and carried him to the bedroom, which made him more excited.

•◦���────•◦ᘡᘞ •◦────✦◦•◦•

Confident!sub, a charming and flirtatious individual, utilizes his natural charisma and wit to captivate those around him. Easily drawing in his audience, he leaves them craving more of his company. His tactics to garner attention, however, are solely to attract the cameras. When it comes to you, his dearest, he's wholly devoted.

His sarcastic nature and high tolerance levels add an alluring challenge to his persona, making him even more magnetic. For you, though, his sarcasm serves as a playful means of aggravation.

Confident!sub is confident in his physicality, maintaining his desirable physique through rigorous workouts. Brands and designers clamor for him to be the face of their new products, well aware of his pickiness when it comes to endorsements.

In his pursuit of physical perfection, Confident!sub adheres to a strict regimen of body care. His routine, from head to toe, takes a full three hours, with shower time not even included. If you need the bathroom while he's in there, you'll have to resort to forceful measures.

During his photoshoots, Confident!sub teases you with his movements and poses. He'll gaze hungrily at you, performing his job with you as his little assistant, always present in the room. If you're absent, his temper flares. So, sad to say that you're always with him in and out.

A possessive streak emerges in Confident!sub when he spots you admiring other models. With him in the room, half-naked and expecting your adoration, he takes offense at your gaze wandering to less attractive individuals. If you curse at him for his tantrums, his anger intensifies, believing you should have been fixated on him.

Confident!sub is unfiltered in his communication, voicing his thoughts at any given moment. Be it day, night, place, or time, he'll share his uncensored musings. With a bored expression, he'll casually mention desires like you satisfying him behind a door post-shoot or gripping his hair. One time while you were having breakfast, he mumbled something about how he dreamed about you pounding him for a photoshoot.

Despite his outward confidence, Confident!sub harbors insecurities deep down. He worries that one day, his looks might fade, and he'll lose the adoration he currently enjoys. So with you having around him, he dares not to let you go. He hates it when you look at other models that he finds intimidating. Whenever you reassure him about his insecurities, expect not getting out of the bedroom for atleast two days.

Confident!sub hates being touched by strangers. He becomes uncomfortable and edgy when people he doesn't know try to touch him. He's only comfortable with you touching him. You should be lucky that someone like him allows you to touch him, his words not mine.

——

After a long and tiring photoshoot, Confident!sub was ready to unwind. With his manager having rented a hotel room for him, he of course invited you to join him, knowing full well what he had in mind. You, aware of Confident!sub's intentions, eagerly accepted the invitation.

In the privacy of the hotel room, Confident!sub wasted no time in expressing his desires. You pinned him against the wall, his hands roaming your body with a hunger that could not be satiated. With you, equally aroused, gripped Confident!sub's hair, pulling him in for a passionate kiss.

Confident!sub's hands slid down to your body, undoing your pants with a swift motion. He wasted no time in freeing his own arousal, rubbing it against yours before he could let you rub against his entrance. With a swift thrust, you entered him, filling him with your length.

The room was filled with the sounds of him screaming your name and the wet sounds. Confident!sub's moans echoed off the walls, a testament to his pleasure. You, gripping onto Confident!sub's hair, praised him for his skill and good looks, encouraging him to continue his plea.

Confident!sub, driven by your words, moving his hips at the same pace as you with a fervor that was almost animalistic. Your hands gripped on his hips, pulling him closer with each thrust. Him, lost in a sea of pleasure, could only hold on for dear life, his moans mingling in the air.

As you both reached your climax, Confident!sub's moans grew louder, your thrusts becoming more erratic. Him, gripping onto you tightly, felt his own release building. With a final thrust, you both reached, your bodies trembling with the force releasing.

•◦✦────•◦ᘡᘞ •◦────✦◦•◦•

Intimidating!sub, a formidable figure with a history in the military, bears scars on both his face and body. His imposing physique and commanding posture are enough to convey his cold and strict demeanor, deterring others from approaching him. Even children and pets are frightened by his aura.

Despite his chilling exterior, Intimidating!sub has a soft spot for his beloved. At the mere sound of his name, spoken by you, his defenses crumble. He prefers to reserve his genuine smiles for private moments, sharing them only with you.

In terms of protection, Intimidating!sub is unparalleled. His presence alone is enough to deter potential aggressors, as if he were a guard dog watching over you. His menacing appearance suggests he'd defend you with ferocity, ready to "bite" anyone who dares to bother you.

In private, Intimidating!sub reveals a sensitive side. He cries during movies or deep conversations, seeking your comfort. With his head resting on your chest, he finds solace as he weeps, trying to express his feelings or explain the emotions triggered by a film. He's known to shed tears privately if his actions upset a child or pet.

Intimidating!sub is an intellectual powerhouse, capable of answering nearly any query and solving complex mathematical problems in a matter of seconds. He's like a human calculator, with an uncanny ability to memorize information. This makes outings with him effortless, as you need not consult your phone for calculations or searches.

Eager for your affection, Intimidating!sub leans on your shoulder, a subtle request for attention. He demands your love, regardless of your current engagements. If he's bold enough, he'll wake you to share a tender gaze.

Embarrassed by his nocturnal desires, Intimidating!sub awakens from wet dreams, seeking solace in the bathroom. If he gathers the courage, he'll attempt to rouse you, his eyes pleading softly.

——

After Intimidating!sub woke you from your slumber, you noticed the flush on his face, a testament to his embarrassment. A soft whimper escaped his lips, "Please help me with this..." Your eyes followed his gaze downward, where you found his hardened length, throbbing and grinding against the material of his pants.

The sight was too enticing to ignore, and as he offered you a small, tender peck on the cheek, you decided to give in to his desires. You guided his hand to release his length from its prison, letting it spring free. The tip glistened with pre-cum, a clear indication of his arousal.

Intimidating!sub's eyes locked onto yours, pleading for your touch. You obliged, wrapping your hand around his shaft and beginning to stroke him gently. His breathing hitched, his face contorting in pleasure. You teased him, speeding up and slowing down your strokes, drawing out his pleasure.

As you continued, Intimidating!sub's body grew more tense, his hips bucking involuntarily. You could sense his impending release, and you leaned in, taking his length into your mouth. The sensation of your warm, wet mouth enveloping him sent him over the edge.

Intimidating!sub cried out your name, his body trembling as he came. You swallowed his release, showing no signs of discomfort. When you pulled away, he collapsed onto the bed, his body slick with sweat.

You climbed on top of him, straddling his hips, and lowered yourself onto his still-hard shaft. He gasped, his hands gripping your hips as you began to ride him. The intimacy of this moment, with the dominant figure now reduced to the bottom, was intoxicating.

•◦✦────•◦ᘡᘞ •◦────✦◦•◦•

@𝑬𝑼𝑵𝑿𝑯𝑨𝑵. Do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or adapt my work/theme without prior permission and/or confirmation.

[cherrygirlfriend]

the obx fandom just full of airheads bruh 😭😭😭😭😭😭 it hurts that most of us are women too. Don't get me wrong i love the show and a lot of the writers here are really talented but the way a lot of y'all refuse to just *think* 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 omfg god im crying we should be better than this bruh... literature has always been political in some way that's unavoidable bc our existence itself as humans in this society is inherently political. fanfiction might not be intentionally about politics but the concepts and ideas we use—our very own perception of love and the way human relationships work in itself are always somehow influenced by politics and social structures. the show itself, obx is literally about class struggle (kook vs pogue) and when writers write about kook!reader or pogue!reader, their dynamic with rafe is almost always heavily dependent on their class/social status.

hell, literature and art itself has always been used as political propaganda. fanfiction isn't immune to this bc fanfiction is literally a part of mainstream culture 😭 most of yall who romanticize misogyny have been exposed through so much propaganda through the sudden influx of tradwife and redpill content on social media, books, and movies the past years and it's slipping through the fanfiction you write and consume to the point that you're also subconsciously churning out even more propaganda. the govt machinery infiltrates through our media, art, film, and literature to sell a romanticized/glorified/fetishized idea of sexism, homophobia, racism, etc —> influencers and creators spread and dumb these ideas down to more subtle, relatable, and almost innocent content to thousands of audiences—> these ideas become popularized and are successfully assimilated by the public to the point that the government doesn't even have to put effort on propaganda bc it's become so ingrained to the people's beliefs that they're now regurgitating the same propaganda subconsciously —> these ideas become so normalized to an extent that it has become a part of our culture again —> mindless consumption is in, critical thinking is out (e.g. "it's just fanfiction, it's not that deep!") to prevent people from questioning culture and challenging ideas and beliefs —> the cycle repeats.

i know this long-ass rant is making me sound like a crazy conspiracy theorist rn but i fear, this is literally just a product of critical thinking and attending highschool history lessons. nazi germany didn't become what it was bc the entire country suddenly decided "ah, yes, killing jews is perfectly right and necessary" no, it took years of propaganda dehumanizing jews through science, education, media, art, film, and literature that people has accepted as their culture because THEY WERE RESTRICTED FROM THINKING CRITICALLY. ik it's crazy to compare nazism with some sexist fanfiction but do y'all not see the same pattern happening again??? "omg being used as a breeding machine is so lana del rey coquette 1950s babydoll old hollywood divine feminine aesthetic <333 sexism so kawaii bows and ribbons, hearts and glitter !!!" DO YALL HEAR HOW FUCKING INSANE SOME OF YALL SOUND?????? 😭😭😭😭😭 you're regurgitating the same shit bigots like charlie kirk, ben shapiro, and andrew tate are saying but make it pink.

now, i'm not saying we should make fanfiction "political" or make it about politics all the time but god just fucking think, people !!! 😭😭😭😭😭 you cannot incorporate something as political as "sexist!rafe" into your work and just turn your brain off and go "not everything is political!" bc news flash sexism IS political.

disclaimer: i have nothing against the housewife trope as long as the character was treated with respect and love or if not, her struggles are at least not written to be something "romantic" or "hot." i'm not at all against depictions of sexism or bigotry in art, media, or fanfiction. i think it could be a great concept to explore how gender norms, like i said, influence power dynamics within our relationships and our general perception of love, when done WITH SENSITIVITY AND NUANCE. but when it's straight up romanticization and fetishization, then i'm sorry but it's just conservative propaganda slop.

i feel like this pretty much encapsulates my thoughts 😭

[moldybonessmell]

"Deadpool and Wolverine": queercoding analysis of Poolverine in the movie

// SPOILERS

//Disclaimer: This is NOT a hate post to Vanessa/Wade shipp, but if you ship them, this post is probably not for you.

I've seen a few queerbaiting allegations and, frankly, don't agree with them. Now I'll explain why.

Starting with the fact that movie begins as a typical reasoning for a character to get a new love interest: we find out Wade and Vanessa broke up after roughly 7-8 years together.

Either we don't know (or I just don't remember lol) for how long they've been separate, but it was enough time for Vanessa to get in a new relationship.

And we know that the reason for this breakup is the core differences between the two. In the previous movie they wanted to get a child and Wade's entire motivation was based around Vanessa. In this movie tho, it seems like even if Wade is still not completely over breakup, he seems to be compliant with the fact they are not together anymore. You would expect Wade to go and do something silly to Nessa's new guy, but he doesn't. He respects her decidion.

Wade has more of an existentioal crisis than just hurting from the breakup. So I would assume he's not over because he feels like he messed up and keeps giving sad puppy eyes holding on this romantic relationship with Vanessa. Tho they are still soulmates and friends no matter what.

I don't know about you, but for me this exposition doesn't look like a foreshadowing of Vanessa and Wade getting back together. Vanessa is happy and self-actualised on her own, even if Wade is not.

I don't see Wade trying to change as an act of trying to get back with Vanessa. He reacts like this because his family member pointed out his flaws.

Secondly, the only other "hints" for a relationship between Wade and Vanessa is him remembering how they kissed and in the end Vanessa holding Wade's hand. Which, let me point out, is not a typical trope to show characters are back together. You know what's typical? A KISS! Which never happened btw.

Not to be this person, but we all know Disney/Marvel haven't got the balls to show a canon queer relationship. So the only "hints" for Vanessa/Wade seem to either read as platonic, or purely as an attempt of Disney to be like !look! female love interest!.

Now, other important part. If you really think about it, referencing the first part of the post, the movie follows an enemies-to lovers romantic movie formula:

(optional) breakup with previous partner;

annoyance first (previous deadpool movies);

admiration upon actual meeting (even if Wade acts cocky, when you listen to him telling the story about how his universe's Logan saved Laura, you can clearly see he adores the hero, who, as we know, is relatively similar throughout multiverse. Wade knows this Logan has the same morals as other ones, hearing how he regrets not being able to help his x-men);

"having to" go on an adventure/quest together even tho they are annoyed at each other;

enemies bickering and fighting because they have differences (which are actually similarities between the two which drive them insane when they see this mirroring);

the breaking point and confrontation (the Logan monologue in the car scene);

*the close proximity tention* hate fucking as a spicy way to get over the argument (in the car scene they are shown to fight just for the sake of letting out steam);

the cold period when characters ignore each other because they are still pissed (when Laura got the two to her base);

getting over it and working together, trusting that the other got their back;

saving the world with the power of love brotherhood with romantic soundtrack on;

both staying alive and having a heart-to-heart conversation;

one wants to leave, but the other stops them (usually it would be followed up with a kiss but oh well);

officially meeting a parental figure of one of the characters and moving in together as in an established relationship.

I don't think I'm delusional if I say I haven't seen brotherhood media (ones without queerbaiting or actual siblings) that would follow this formula. But I did see romantic storylines.

All in all, Wade and Logan go through a development and establishment of a relationship. And I'm not even talking about the obvious "one being there when other lost everything and giving them a new family and home".

In the movie there are so many romantic tropes of these CANONICALLY QUEER CHARACTERS, which make it safe to assume that queercoding is in fact happening. I would argue about it if both of them were straight in the source material, but this is the best and most important part, they are not :)

And this is why "Deadpool & Wolverine" is actually a romcom. Thank you for reading!

[bumblebeesfromvenus]

Simon Riley NSFW hcs ♡

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Two lovely people asked for my NSFW Simon headcannons and I'm happy to provide!!

Just a disclaimer, these are my headcannons. If you have ones that are totally different, that's okay!

He's fictional and can be whatever you want him to be <3 (except a rapist. We don't do that here.)

If you have any COD thoughts or requests, my inbox is open!!

~ Fi 🐝

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I'm a soft!Simon truther until death.

There's not a single reality in which I can see him ever being too rough with you, let alone hurting you.

First of all, he has no fucking clue what he's doing. He's maybe had sex 2-3 times in his life and I don't think any of them were memorable or good.

I'd wager that all of them were hookups, encouraged by other soldiers to "let off steam". But Simon just can't do it, it feels so wrong. To give himself so fully to someone he doesn't even know.

There needs to be an emotional connection in order for him to feel comfortable and good. He needs to trust and love this person before he can do anything with them.

It's gonna take a while for him to open up, but once he does everything is smooth sailing.

(I also don't think he masturbated excessively. He probably jerked off, everyone gets horny, but especially if we say he's on antidepressants, his sex drive is pretty low. He's either too tired or just doesn't care)

Your first time together was fueled by a, not so uncommon, make-out session on his couch. It'd usually end with you grinding on his thigh or rubbing yourself over his clothed cock until you both reached a satisfactory end.

Simon thinks he could live an entire relationship with only sticking to dry humping, but in reality he's just terrified of the intimacy of real sex.

It's not too romantic, none of that rose petals lit candle stuff. It's not that Simon hates all of that, but I just think it'd be too much for the first time.

He's already so nervous (so are you probably if we're honest) and all that extra stuff would overwhelm the fuck out of him.

(He will spoil you with rose petals and candles another night, even if it just ends you with you falling asleep in eachother's arms <3)

Eventhough it's soft and sweet, you're both still very horny and basically rip the clothes off of the other.

Foreplay is important!!! (For all my girlies who don't drip down their thighs)

Not only for you but for him too. Even if he's rock hard already, he wants to enjoy himself, maybe be a tease. He will always make sure that you're okay and ready (and so will you bc he deserves it).

Would literally eat you out to calm himself down. He probably has fallen asleep while licking your pussy, it's his personal meditation.

Your taste, the way you feel on his tongue and the fact that he was two perfectly good pillows wrapped around his head made it easy for him to nod off.

Also, he prefers it hairy. (Fight me.) (pls don't)

I know it's cliche but he's like 2 seconds away from just coming inside of you the second he pushes in. Not only does he feel good but when he looks down he sees you and he could cry from how happy he is. He just loves you so much.

Can we please put the "You only take half of him" bullshit to rest??? Thank you. We all know Simon as BDE but let's keep it on the real side okay. He couldn't give less of a shit if you can take him to the hilt or not.

(Some gals physically can't bc if your vaginal canal is too short, then it's impossible. You don't want a bruised cervix, so don't be stupid) I do think when he's more comfortable about it and a little more desperate and rough, he'll play into the size kink.

He probably has a huge size kink anyway but he would never make you feel bad if you couldn't take all of him. (Especially if you're giving him head bc let's be real that thing is not going down no one's throat okay)

He has the prettiest moans. I JUST KNOW IT. they're more throaty and deep but they sound good. I honestly don't think this man is capable of whimpering (like physically. Not with that smoker lung) sorry babes.

Simon isn't too loud, but just enough to make you that much hotter. He will try to pull more moans out of you, like a little challenge for himself.

NONE OF THAT "10 rounds Riley" SHIT. (Have any of y'all ever had an orgasm before like?? Who the fuck is going ten rounds??? Not me that's for sure lmao) it really all depends on your guys' mood and neediness on that day.

I do think he can and wants to go a couple of rounds but it's probably more on the rare side and never more than 4.

He knocks out immediately. He's always tired anyways.

I think his favorite positions are missionary, prone bone, and cow girl. He likes the closeness, wants to feel every part of you and kiss it like his life depends on it.

The further you are into your relationship, the more new stuff you can try out. He's always gonna be hesitant at first but if it's not too out there he'll try it.

Simon will tell you if something is a hard no for him and he expects you to respect, just as he would for you.

Would 100% make you ride his face. Wants to he smothered in it okay. (Simon said sit, so sit.)

Simon would be down to tying you up (one condition; you're never tied to anything. In case of emergencies)

You won't get him to be tied up though, that's a real hard no.

I think the closest you'd get to a submissive Simon is if you order him around.

He's sitting on his knees before you and you tell him exactly what you want him to do (one thing Simon Riley can do is follow orders) and he'll pretend to let you be in control and maybe you are for a while, but deep down he's always in control (not necessarily sexual or possessively, he just needs the security)

He loves to get head (not as much as giving it tho) but he will never ever force his cock down your throat, even if you begged him.

He can't do it, won't do it. Has he had the urge and fantasies?? Sure, but it goes against everything he promised when you got into a relationship.

Sweetly suck on his tip and stroke the rest of his length and he's happy as a clam <3

His absolutely favorite thing is when you ride him in the morning. Just lazy and sloppy circles of your hips while you sit on top of him. He loves the sight.

Simon'll gently hold onto your hips and guide you if need be. It's even better if you're laying flush against his chest and the both of you are snuggled under the blanket.

Bonus; he loves to make-out with you. It's an unhealthy obsession that has led to too much lipgloss/lipstick ingested just bc the fucker couldn't wait 2 minutes for you to take it off.

Kissing you is his number 1 way to show you how much he loves you since words aren't his strong suit.

Needless to say, he's head over heels for you, and the sex is great. <3

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I hope you lovelies enjoyed it!

More of my works --> 💫

[aurae-rori]

DR RATIO ANALYSIS PT 3 BUT IT'S JUST GAY

Now, you might be saying - "Aurae, you've done part one, and part two, so why do we need a part three?" The answer is because of two things - one. I made a deal with the Tumblr Peoples that if one of my posts hit more than 50 likes I would do this analysis. Two. Mihoyo is making this shit canon. I CAN'T MAKE THIS UP. So, let's delve into my usual disclaimer, as we might have some new people joining us for the first time with my insanity.

I have been researching psychology personally for about six years, so although I am not a professional (crawling my way there through the education system. I will be one, one day.) I do have some experience with analyzing homosexuals. Psychology hours, my children. They don't call me "chronically cooking" for nothing. Maybe I should change my url to that...

NOW THAT MY LONG AHH DISCLAIMER IS OVER, LET'S GET INTO THIS! It's time to deconstruct these homosexuals like a modern airplane, because they might as well be taking off with how canon they are.

"It can't be canon," they say, but then Mihoyo DOES PAID SPONSORSHIPS WITH THESE FUCKERS BEING GAY. We've all seen the paid partnership edit. We've all seen the video where Aventurine has the audio of "nice rack" as he talks to Dr. Ratio. PAID SPONSORSHIPS. Now, if that piece of evidence isn't enough for you - let's dive into their actual relationship, which is just a HOMOSEXUAL MESS. I will be focusing more on how Dr. Ratio sees this guy as this is a Dr. Ratio analysis™, but hey, the crumbs.. we eat 'em all. Amen.

Let's start off (I say as I write this part three days later) about how people are like, 'Aven is Ratio's favourite idiot' WRONG. Ratio does NOT consider Aventurine to be an idiot and knows that he is smart and capable in his own right. While Ratio is book smart, Aven is extremely street smart and holds his own very well. Ratio does not consider Aventurine to be an idiot as he takes off his plaster head around him and actually indulges in his whims around him. This is a blatant showcase of fondness because although he is emotionally constipated and can't be affectionate through words without sounding semi-backhanded because he's never had true affection in his life, he showcases his love through actions rather than words. He's just bad at showing love, okay? But he does love Aven. Or like him, to some extent, if you don't want to see them as romantic, which is fine. However, no matter what you label their bond as, it's obvious that they care for one another.

Also, the fucking ZEST FEST that was 'keeping up with Star Rail'. He says, "wait a minute - MUTUAL?" which indicates that he has respect for Aventurine in the first place. He LITERALLY TOLD US that he respects Aventurine and he was commenting on Aventurine's playstyle & everything.. also, at the end, he was here because 'I appreciate this show's dedication to knowledge' - his TONE. Kudos to the VA because that was not convincing at all. Bro was NOT here for the knowledge, bro was here to be GAY!!! Also his little own bathtub couch. We all know Aven bought it for him. Trust, I am John Hoyoverse.

"The Charming Audacity" HUH? BRO? Okay this is hilarious to me because this is the first time that we ever really see them interact with one another, and we get absolutely bitchslapped in the fact that Dr. Ratio calls this guy's audacity 'charming'. That's GAY. That's HOMOSEXUAL.

Also, comparing him to a peacock.. a very beautiful bird.... Must I say more?

Now, the part that I really want to focus on is the part where he gives the Doctor's Note to Aventurine. This shit is important. And I agree with the people who are like - Acheron helped him. Because she did. She was a big part of it and she helped Aventurine get back on his feet in the void. Dr. Ratio is not his only reason to live, but the note, showing that someone will stay by his side? Showing that someone truly cares for him? Someone who's waiting for him when he get back? This bond that he has with Dr. Ratio isn't fake. He already has a starting point to get back to - an anchor to return to. Dr. Ratio is his anchor. Whenever he goes off to do crazy shit, Veritas Ratio will be there when he returns. Because Ratio is loyal. Ratio cares. He cared enough to almost jeopardize their plan to make sure that Aventurine was going to be okay. He cares so damn much about Aventurine that he decided that this man's emotional state after the fake betrayal was more important than all of fucking Penacony.

If you want an example of "I would let the world burn for you," it's Ratio. He's a romantic not in the traditional sense, but he cares and loves Aventurine so damn much it makes my heart hurt. "Do stay alive," he says, knowing that Aventurine struggles with living. Those three words mean the whole fucking world to someone who struggles with suicidal ideation and suicidal thoughts. Someone wants you to live. Someone wants you to stay. Someone wants you by their side.

Dr. Ratio cares. Let me say that again - he cares. He banters with Aventurine, tries to create an environment where Aventurine can feel a little bit more comfortable with the two of them, even in a place as dangerous as Penacony. He will put his own life on the line for Aventurine.

He cares. He cares so damn much. I hate gay people. They make me VIOLENTLY homophobic.

Dr. Ratio after expressing his care indirectly and complimenting Aventurine indirectly: Did I do it?

Aventurine, who has caught none of the hints:

Anyway, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[billyshakesp]

Understanding Monsters: Augustine and Mercymorm, John and Alecto

I find these characters and pairings in TLT particularly deep and visceral. So here are some of my thoughts on them. I'll be focusing more on John and Augustine in this post as they are outliers in TLT universe as powerful and significant male characters. Disclaimer's out of the way, here is my autopsy on these people.

The four mentioned in the title are truly some of the most conceptually disturbing characters I have ever read, period. This isn't exactly a new point, but the Lyctors in general are absolutely terrifying. They reside in the depths of uncanny valley. They are two people in a meat suit. Their lives have been painted over by grief for ten thousand years. They have singlehandedly orchestrated the deaths of solar systens. They are fundamentally beyond human experience, and yet. They are human. Or, at least, they have scraps of the humans they were buried within them. Again, the so nearly human but not human-ness which forms uncanny valley. Alecto is not a Lyctor, but she is five billion dead souls in a barbie doll, and the same concept apllies to her.

I personally love Augustine and Mercymorn's relationship. Not necessarily in a sexual, or romantic, or quite frankly platonic way. I just think they're such an exquisite case study on "the horrors of love." We know that Cristabel's death absolutely fucked Mercymorn up-and that would be the understatement of the myriad. I suspect Augustine has his own inner turmoil over the death of Alfred, though he doesn't show it. He does describe Alfred as "his other half." Alfred is his brother. He comments once that "I have built an entire myriad on the idea that I could have made him come around, given five minutes." Augustine's aloof attitude doesn't strike me as very genuine, but a facade. In any case, the two have suffered trauma beyond human comprehension. Yes, they're awful people, but in the end they have the humility to reach out and behold each other and understand each other. The interaction between Augustine and Mercymorn right after the capital-d Deicide might not be love, per se, but it is the first step in that direction. They have the respect, the humility, the humanity!-to take that step.

John and Alecto are...not that. Honestly, John's head is shoved so far up his ass and Alecto is so monstrous (not through any fault of her own, to be clear) that I don't know what absolution for those two looks like. Sure, John does love Alecto; he probably loves her more than Augustine and Mercymorn ever admitted to loving each other. The difference, of course, is that John's love is birthed from trauma and self-hatred. The difference, of course is that Alecto embodies all of John's vindictive, destructive tendencies, and John keeps clinging onto her. Augustine and Mercymorn may embody the worst of what Lyctorhood creates, yes, but together they try to rectify all of that. Alecto represents the worst in John, and John loves her and clings to her obsessively. There's a lot more to say about these characters and there is a lot more that I plan to say, but there's my mini-rant concluded. I really need to see Augustine and Mercymorn go a secind round against John in Alecto the Ninth (in a sex way? In a fatal combat way? Are they all literally inside of Alecto the Ninth, the person, while this is taking place? Find out in Alecto the Ninth, the novel, coming to shelves the myriadic year 20000 of our lord!). Thanks for making it this far, dear reader. Together we sleep the night, and we wait for the morning.

[kwamiwayzz]

Why Jeckole (Jecka/Nicole) is the Most Popular Ship of Class of '09 - Part I

Or: Part I should be renamed to why is Aricole or Emicole not as popular as Jeckole?

After being in this community for sometime, and even waffling in-between thinking whether I still like this ship versus thinking they're just a repackaged, white American-version of another ship I love - that's another discussion for later, dear lord, I wanted to put all my thoughts down somewhere to why I think Jecka and Nicole have dominated as the most popular pairing within the Class of '09 fandom.

Disclaimer: I don't want this to be a whole post saying, "Jeckole is the best4eva, Emicole and Aricole sUX XD" but more of an explanation breaking down why this ship in particular is one that most of the fandom has gravitated towards when getting into Class of'09. After all, there has to be some reason to why it's still persisted among fans (old and new). There was even a Jeckole Week 2025 despite the fandom slowly fizzling out after Flip Side's release.

Now that the disclaimer is out of the way, time to dig into the popularity of SBN's most hated pairing. I haven't been in an English/Writing class since college, and it's been so long since I've ever written an essay, so let's hope (all my jumbled thoughts) everything I try to explain sounds coherent enough.

To the fans surprise (at least if you didn't know anything about SBN), he never wrote the interactions among all the girls with any queer subtext in mind. He mostly did it for 1) money, and 2) a way to get his fixation on teenage girls/lesbians out somewhere...The guy is a freak (and not in a good way). It's only a miracle that his game got this much traction and popularity.

He ended up playing himself because what else should he expect when his most hated pairing is one that the fandom loves. People can come up with all sorts of arguments as to how this game blowing up on TikTok led to teenage lesbians missing the point of the games or running off everything out of context and yadda, yadda, yadda...And maybe there is some validity in those arguments as well.

But at the end of the day, it doesn't change the fact that Jecka and Nicole became the most popular ship even after SBN was "baiting" fans.

Shipping isn’t an unpredictable beast that grows completely independently of its source material. The ways writers craft interactions between their characters–and the places where they invest the most and infuse the most life–are powerful tools that impact how fans view and come to love seeing characters both separately and in romantic relationships. (Why Do Non-Canon Ships Become So Popular - And Why Should Writers Rethink When They Do? by sarehptar on AO3)

Fanart numbers is a completely different story, so I'm going to put that aside for now.

Starting with AO3 stats, Jeckole overshadows the other ships as one of the "Big 3" (Big 3 being Jeckole, Aricole, Emicole). On the left, it's the general numbers of pairs you could filter from. While on the right, it's after filtering the tags with "otp: true"

But wait...why are Ari and Nicole fics so criminally low compared to the monster of a ship that is Jeckole, when Aricole is considered canon? This same question can be applied to Emily and Nicole. Why does Jecka and Nicole still overshadow the other two pairs even though both Ari and Emily have canonically expressed romantic interest in Nicole in their respective routes?

[Full Text of Emily's Message Below]

you wont see this cuz they make us turn our phones off but i just want to write this for me. I'm glad we are dying together it just feels right and I can't think of anyone i would rather do it with. I may as well write this too... i am super fucking gay for you sorry i lied in the hallway and didn't tell u before we shared a bed and changed in front of each other. idk if that's rape or whatever but if it is sorry lol. i can die fulfilled cuz dying together with another girl is a bigger commitment than some soft ass bitch getting married to jack the construction worker or some other boring white guy who cant pronounce Beanie Sigel. but ya if you pass out first I'm gonna try to fall over on you so it looks like were cuddling <3

I think one explanation for this is that Ari and Emily's canonical romantic interest in Nicole, along with most of their interactions with her, are primarily isolated into one route. For Ari, this is through the Hate Crime/Abusive Exes Ending. While for Emily, this is through the Suicide Pact Ending. That's not to say that shippers can't fuel themselves off crumbs and scraps until the end of time--look at one of Aricole's most well-known artists, Misan. But when taking a peek into the Class of '09 fandom from an outside perspective, the first ship you'll most likely come across is Jeckole. Even some people who like Aricole, Emicole, or some rarepairs, tend to be multishippers who universally think Jeckole is a good pairing.

As I've mentioned in previous discussions with a few people on Tumblr, Jecka and Nicole's interactions span throughout all three games in multiple routes. Nicole's interactions with Jecka aren't confined to just one or two routes. It's understandable why others would see their interactions as that of your typical best friends trope. And that's completely fine too--I actually initially saw them as just that until I decided to try the game out on a whim one day.

However, after reading an essay from sarehptar (Echodrops on Tumblr), they mention something about "emotional energy" within a story:

When I talk about “emotional energy,” I don’t necessarily mean romantic emotions (and in fact, in the case of most non-canon ships, I don’t mean romantic emotions at all!). Rather, what I mean is the weight, power, and dynamism of the myriad emotions characters express for one another, including friendship/camaraderie, trust, reliance, frustration, anger, hatred, sadness, etc. For the purposes of this discussion, emotional energy is any of the meaningful emotional interactions that two characters share–especially those which drive the main plot of a story.

I figured in the context of Nicole and Jecka in the VNs, it made sense as to why many fans gravitated towards them compared to the side pairings. This isn't to say that Nicole doesn't have emotional energy with Emily or Ari. There's a reason why Aricole and Emicole are one of the main pairings of the fandom. However, among the three main leads that Nicole interacts with, there's only one person who she centers herself around (and vice versa to an extent).

And that's Jecka.

(Screenshot from the Anime Pilot because look how much of a wet cat Nicole is trying to win Jecka's favor back)

In every single route from the original game, Jecka is always introduced to Nicole no matter what choice she makes. Whether this is after talking to Crispin or Jeffery at the beginning of the game, she always ends up running into Jecka either way.

(Screenshots Below - On the left is on Nicole's first day of school. On the right is on Nicole's second day of school if she didn't meet Jecka on the first day.)

In both instances of her first meeting with Jecka, Nicole was readily available to give out her name to this girl she just met despite having the mindset that any bonds she makes will be completely pointless. She even goes on to talk about herself and her issues with her brother to Jecka within the first two days she's met her.

"But Nicole is probably just doing that because Jecka is a more tolerable option!"

That could be true, but the player doesn't get the same kind of introduction between Nicole and Emily, Nicole and Ari, or Nicole and any other student. With Jeffery, she was only messing with him. By the time Nicole interacts with Emily in Re-Up, they're already friends. I think they're already somewhat-acquainted before the Remedial English (Suicide Pact/Get Ms. Ames Fired) Route.

By the time Nicole interacts with Ari in Re-Up, they already know each other (though, Nicole finds her a bit of an annoyance). Ari also falls for Nicole quickly after their session with the counselor while Nicole is primarily in power once they start to date.

I don't want to make it sound like I'm dismissing the other two pairings when I bring up other scenes and interactions between Jecka and Nicole. You can view them as just best friends (or even friends-of-convenience), while seeing Nicole's relationship with Ari or Emily as a more valid romantic option, and that's okay. But the examples I'm going to talk about are to give insight on why this non-canon ship is so popular within the fandom despite never canonically expressing any romantic feelings towards one another.

(Side Note: I've probably re-read sarehptar/Echodrops's essay more times than I can count in the past few days)

To get this out of the way, I'm going to get into why Aricole and Emicole are often overshadowed by Jeckole.

You can argue that Nicole does center herself around Ari or Emily, depending on which route you choose in Re-Up. In the Date Ari Route, Nicole is constantly with her girlfriend (mostly abusing her), but that sense of push-and-pull isn't exactly as apparent. It's more of Nicole pulling, and Ari being pulled.

While I've seen arguments that Ari's more manipulative side can be seen from the Rejection Route, it still has the same vibe as the Date Ari Route except Ari is the one pulling, while Nicole is being pulled. I've seen fans love this aspect of this ship, and it all boils down to preferences. But that lack of push-pull within canon is probably why it's not on the same level of popularity as Jeckole. (That doesn't make Aricole a bad ship. Do not come for me!) Ari and Nicole aren't shown in canon to be equally on par in keeping up with one another.

The tension between them either leans more towards one character or the other, depending on which route the player goes for (Hate Crime or Abusive Exes). This is why some fans do the work themselves and combine aspects of both of these routes to get a more "equal playing-field" Aricole.

Okay, so if Aricole feels like a pull-and-be-pulled dynamic, then wouldn't Emily and Nicole be on more equal ground? They both have similar backgrounds with mental health issues and are both pretty unhinged people. Like others have said, they're the epitome of, "They make each other worse."

During Suicide Pact in Re-Up, Emily mentions how she planned to flush all her Seroquel down the toilet after feeling the adrenaline rush of everything she did when spending time with Nicole. This entire route has them fucking around, skipping remedial, making Jeffery's life worse--and they both get a rush from that. But when Nicole starts to see how unmedicated/unfiltered Emily actually is, she starts to get a little scared of her.

This duo starts out as if they're on equal ground, but the moment Emily turns into her unmedicated BPD-self, Nicole just gets pulled into whatever Emily does so that she doesn't piss her off. And I figure that Nicole's fear (and respect) of Emily is why she didn't try to save her, and only saved herself when they both planned to overdose in Ms. Ames class.

What is it that both Emily and Ari have in common despite having canonical romantic feelings for Nicole? Both of their dynamic with Nicole feel almost one-sided. I don’t just mean with their romantic feelings, I also mean with their dynamic in general.

“The games aren’t meant to be a dating sim!”

Yeah I know. But when Nicole doesn’t interact with Ari all that much, they’re neither focal points to each other’ narratives at all. The same can be said for Emily.

With Jecka, Nicole is almost always with her. They skip class together, they do drugs together, they got into a situation where they pissed off a mall cop, etc, etc. I also want to point out that Jecka is often the first person that Nicole goes to when she’s bored, wants someone to talk to, or wants to hang around, and is willing to (kinda of) change for. However, while the part about Nicole “changing” is a stretch, canonically-speaking, I was going to try and go more in-depth with that in Part II.

When Nicole isn’t around Jecka, Jecka ends up going back to her shallow high school friendships (like with Kelly), but admits to Nicole that she only sat with Kelly so she isn't alone. So…they’re both in the same boat and drive each other’s narratives of trying to survive the bullshit of high school through each other.

Anyway, this wasn’t meant to be a formal analysis at all, but I think I went a bit too far to the point where my brain feels absolutely fried now. I’m just hoping this doesn’t come across as ship-bashing when comparing Nicole’s dynamic with both Ari and Emily.

Who knows how long Part II will take me lol.

[micah-of-the-psychos]

I'm begging and screaming for the people that say "attachment doesn't mean love" to rewatch the Prequels. You don't even have to rewatch the fucking Clone Wars. It is literally the most obvious thing that attachment, yes, does in fact mean love. No, Anakin saying "Jedi are encouraged to love" in AotC does not prove you right, it's him saying "well technically I'm allowed to love" in a very tongue-in-cheek manner, blatantly implying that he's actually breaking the rules (on another note, some people on here really like flip-flopping on whether or not Anakin is a reliable narrator, and it seems to solely depend upon whether or not they agree with what he's saying). It's about as subtle as a semi truck. Plus, the entire time that he's married to her he has to keep his relationship secret because his relationship is, y'know, forbidden. He has to hide that she is pregnant because his relationship to her is, in fact, forbidden.

Since y'all love bringing up what George Lucas said about what attachment actually means, riddle me this: why would he write an entire forbidden romance subplot contingent on the Jedi forbidding things like romantic relationships if the Jedi didn't, in fact, forbid romantic relationships? There's two options here: either George Lucas is an even worse writer than we thought, or he's doing the interview version of retconning shit on Twitter. Since people ignored JKR even before she became prolific bigot, I think it's safe to assume most people think Word of God means jack shit if they're actively retconning core aspects of their work. So Lucas's word is utterly worthless in this argument regardless of his intentions.

Another blatantly obvious bit of proof that attachment=love is the fact that Jedi can't have relationships with their birth family. Full stop. There is no ambiguity to whether or not this is true, there is no George Lucas interviews for you to hide behind; this is irrevocably canon. And there is quite literally no legitimate excuse for the Jedi to do this. All excuses for this, canonical and fandom, circle directly back to "attachment is forbidden", and it is so painfully funny to watch the few people willing to defend this. Most don't even try though, and just ignore this issue entirely, because it is a glaringly obvious contradiction to their glorified headcanon on attachments that they so desperately want to uphold.

You know, I remember back when people on TikTok were freaking out about people not having media literacy. And I remember thinking during that entire time "You guys thought people ever had media literacy?" This portion of the Star Wars fandom in particular is walking proof that media literacy never died, it was already dead the second humanity invented storytelling.

Some disclaimers because some people in this fandom are particularly fond of using straw men and ad hominem, as well as just trolling:

-I don't think the Sith are good guys. You should watch me play KOTOR 1 and count the amount of times I call the Sith assholes, dumbasses, or scum. I very much hate them.

-I don't think that Order 66 was justified. This really shouldn't have to be said, but some people on this platform have rendered this necessary.

-People can headcanon that attachment and love are different things. My problem is when people start treating it as canon and try to force other people too as well.

-Criticizing the Jedi does not mean I am criticizing Buddhism. Even if it did, I will criticize any religion I damn well please because the "It's My Religion" card immediately loses validity the second you physically or psychologically harm other people, especially children. However, the Jedi philosophy on attachment and the Buddhist philosophy on attachment are different, so this argument doesn't hold any water to begin with.

-You are free to like the Jedi. I encourage you to do so. I am not, and never will tell you that you can't.

-I really shouldn't have to make these disclaimers to begin with, but since this is the internet and people don't read the words on the page anymore, I unfortunately have to spell shit out with crayon.

Also, I can and will use the block button. If you engage in bullying or harassment, engage in bad faith arguments, or otherwise say fundamentally false or incredibly stupid shit, I will block you. If you can't handle that, then don't engage with this post. I am not making this post in hopes that you will actually listen to me, because the people that this is directed at don't listen, and don't want to. If you truly disagree with what I've said in this post on such a fundamental level that you need to make a long-winded reply about how everything I've ever said is wrong, please just scroll — dealing with that shit is actually exhausting.

[linkons-most-wanted]

No Return Night - Thoughts

Spoilers below the cut! As usual I apologize if mobile Tumblr trolls anyone. I'd started this a while ago but got distracted, figured better late than never to share my thoughts! 🤣

SPOILERS BELOW HERE

First off, I want to add a disclaimer that 1) I have a strong Sylus bias and 2) I will accept no hate for Caleb or Caleb girlies!!! These are just my subjective thoughts.

Something that stood out to me watching No Return Night is just how many friends Caleb has that he basically tells to fuck off because he only wants to spend time with MC. And I totally get the dark romance aspect and that this is part of the appeal, but 1) that specific dynamic not just my thing personally and 2) I ended up thinking about the contrast to Sylus's birthday where Luke and Kieran are celebrating every day of the month 'cause they don't know the specific day and they're just tickled to be able to wish him happy birthday.

Part of what is (subjectively) off-putting (to me specifically) about a lot of Caleb's content and especially No Return Night is just how callous he is towards his friends. Like when Gideon first sees him again he has ZERO compassion for like "hey so I know you thought I was DEAD and probably MOURNED me."

When MC mentions that the rest of his friends are having a party in his honor but without him there, it's like--has he told them he's alive? If so, kind of a dick move to not at least make SOME time to hang out with them, even on a different day. More likely, only Gideon knows, and MC and Caleb are just sitting there eating while his friends are mourning his death having a memorial dinner for him on his birthday.

Like... dude. I do not feel okay about that.

Not to mention MC just casually picks him up from running THE EVIL SPACE MILITARY THAT MURDERED A CHILD AND KIDNAPPED ANOTHER ONE.

But "dead to the world" is an explicit theme for them--we even see in Homecoming Wings that one of Caleb's first ideas for keeping MC safe is to tell everyone else that she died.

I think this is an artful and intentional decision that highlights the toxic nature of Caleb and MC's relationship. It's the kind of relationship that leads them to want to cut off other people--even people who care about them very much--in order to spend time only with each other.

In contrast, MC spends Sylus's birthday encouraging him to engage with others more. She wants to be at his side going out into the world, and she welcomes and cherishes the presence of Luke, Keiran, and Mephisto. The unhealthiness in Caleb x MC's relationship helps make more clear how intentional and healthy so many aspects of Sylus x MC is.

Something this has made me realize is that I've had several relationships (not romantic, but familial and professional) with people who have tried to cut me off from other people, to keep me to themselves, etc. And so I find that I have a pretty visceral avoidant/fear reaction to some of Caleb's behavior.

Which makes this good writing! Caleb's team is successfully painting a picture and what doesn't work for me is exactly what someone else is looking for, and vice versa. That sort of self-destructive obsession can be really gratifying to read.

But personally, I find that some of Caleb's content leaves me vaguely unsettled and I always learn something about myself while unpacking it, and for that I am legit grateful.

I hope we still get more Caleb yearning content now that we have cards of them "together" because that is always my favorite Caleb mode--desperately wanting something you don't feel good enough to have is deeply relatable. And I think there's a lot of threads to pull about how his self-hatred is what causes him to cut off his friends, even when they could be there for him. So I really do think there's a ton of interesting stuff to look at there, and he's well-written, it's just not always my cup of tea.

I fleetingly saw someone post about how No Return Night felt anti-climactic to them, and ofc they got a lot of disagreement in the comments, but I felt the same way. I think you can project whatever arc you want onto the card, and that's great! But I find myself preferring yearning Caleb and we don't really see any of that in No Return Night--just "all is well" Caleb and then "I'm sick of waiting" Caleb. I found myself either wanting things to be more raw (like their altercation in Homecoming Wings) or more tender (a yearning confession met with acceptance).

What I also think is really interesting and telling is that I do not have nearly as much in common with Caleb's MC as with Sylus's MC. I thought it was poignant and important that she talked about always having taken him for granted--but I just couldn't relate to that, because I had always been the eldest sibling trying to hold it together for everyone. In my own personal journey, I did the equivalent of saying "fuck you" to the Deepspace Fleet and charting my own path. I don't take kindly to ignoring the consequences of our actions and ignoring our access to leverage.

I need to face the truth, in all its ugliness, to keep moving forward and that's a large part of why I gravitate towards Sylus.

Alright, I think that's all my big thoughts. 😅

Again, these are just my personal reactions! I'm sorry for all the disclaimers, but some people will say "oh this is just me" and not really mean it and I really do mean it. 🤣 If you loved the card I love that for you!! I think we can mold and shape and fill in the blanks to these stories in our own personal way, and that is 100% valid and intended. Things that feel like gaps to me may feel complete to you and I actually think that's fascinating and really cool! I know the same thing happens with Sylus and he just clicks with my brain more so it all makes sense. (He's also intentionally written as a "healthier" character.)

[explaintome]

Dear Mouthwashing fandom, explain to me, why next to the incredible fan art, I find a fuck ton of shipping content, especially between characters where this is highly problematic? SPOILERS FOR MOUTHWASHING AHEAD CN for talk about sexual abuse, death, suicide & violence

DISCLAIMER: I do not shame the general practice of shipping at all. I am a shipper myself and I think it makes up for a lot of interesting dynamics and narratives outside the canon. Shipping is an important pillar of fandom communities and I am unable to forbid you to do it. HOWEVER, in the case of Mouthwashing I want to talk about what, in my opinion, feels tone-deaf to the themes and the canon of the game. But let me start with a short summary of the game before I get into it.

Mouthwashing is basically a visual novel that takes place on the Tulpar, the last manned cargo ship of the company Pony Express. The crew, consisting of Caption Curly, Co-Captain Jimmy, Nurse Anya, Mechanic Swansea and his intern Daisuke, is confronted with a crash against an asteroid and the consequences following it. The story is told out of order to reveal the truth bit by bit. What caused the crash, what happened and how the crew deals with the time afterward being stuck on the ship. Revealing sexual abuse, tragic backstories, the horrible side effects of late state capitalism and the neglect of people in command towards the people they are responsible for.

To boil it down we have two men who, out of societal misogyny, hurt the only woman on their crew by assaulting her or not acting as they should have in their position of responsibility. All of this would not have happened if Jimmy didn't rape Anya and impregnate her, and if Curly had disciplined Jimmy in a capacity possible on the ship and in Jimmy's position as co-pilot. To be honest, with the amount of automatization the ship has, I don't think they need Jimmy if it is not a case of emergency, but I digress. Jimmy is the perpetrator of the story, but Curly is an accomplice in putting his aim of finding a solution and compromise over punishing his subordinate as he should have.

And now to my actual point: I am a big fan of the game, the narration style and the utter tragedy of 5 people losing their lives in the isolation of space, with their company not giving a shit about them. Otherwise, they might have been rescued much earlier or at all. Or had enough cryo pots in the first place. Or a nurse with experience. Or any amount of better equipment and not the most cheap shit that somehow made it through a resemblance of regulations. There are probably no regulations.

Being a fan I, of course, looked into the hashtags on several social media sites, and between the incredible art and analysis of the game, I quickly found shipping content, and I have no idea why. I have literally no idea how that narrative speaks to you in a way of shipping characters romantically/sexually. Especially three shippings really rub me the wrong way.

ANYA/JIMMY

Are you fucking kidding me? Literally, what is wrong with you shipping a victim with their abuser? There was not one interaction between them, that suggest that there was consent or affection, that Jimmy has any sympathy for Anya. He knows what is going on, he knows that Anya is pregnant and takes no responsibility. Even worse, his idea of FIXING this was to kill everyone, at least himself, to avoid responsibility! Same goes for AUs where she kept the baby and is somehow okay and happy? I get the urge to fix it, but that is not a good fix. There is no good fix if you are pregnant due to rape.

ANYA/CURLY

A lot of argument I hear for that is that "at least Curly is her friend and was nice to her" and if that is your whole foundation of argument, I want to ask what your standards for a relationship are. Please know that you deserve more than the bare minimum. Another question in that context: Is Curly really Anya's friend? His friend was abused and instead of protecting her, he tried to reason and help her abuser! That is not the behavior of a friend! There is no "but Jimmy is his friend too!". If your friend is an abuser and that does not make you stop being their friend....why?

JIMMY/CURLY

It feels like it is a law on the internet, that two men who look at least averagely handsome will be shipped, especially if they have the tiniest of connection to each other. I am not even sure if I would call them friends in the first place. It appears that Jimmy, whatever his bad life before that job was (thanks to the developers for not giving us a backstory), he is still absolutely unsatisfied with that he has. He is jealous of Curly and his position, seeing how quickly he takes on the Captain title after the crash and only realizes far too late how hard the position actually is. Curly on the other hand feels a bit like a people pleaser to me. He probably had pity for Jimmy, took him under his wing to help him? Fix him? Whatever it is, it made him ignore Jimmy's bad side to a fatal degree. I respect the toxic yaoi but are you sure?

TLDR; I am worried about how the practice of shipping developed, from a way to extend the canon, explore queerness in cis/straight dominated media, into a compulsion of where some people can't look at any form of media or constellation of characters without immediately smashing them together like dolls. If you do this, maybe step back for a minute and ask yourself if it is appropriate. On that note, same goes in case you defend Jimmy. Why?