#did i mention i love smug fear? lol

[tokibuns]

someone's feeling frisky

[paranoiddreams]

Hello! It's currently Halloween where I am, so what about reader taking any of the JJK men to Halloween Horror night where they get chased by clowns and all kinds of creepy cosplay. 100 points if any of them scream like a girl or puff up like a cat.

You can choose which JJK men. 😊

Happy Halloween 🎃

SCREAM! (HC)

🎃 [Inc.] Satoru, Sukuna, Yuji, Megumi

🎃 Warnings!! - fem!reader, some swearing, descriptions of (fake) blood/gore, movies/shows like The Exorcist, Chucky, Stranger Things, The Last of Us, Beetlejuice, and The Haunting of Hill House, cocky Satoru (what’s new), Megumi’s is terribly sweet, lol, Yuji’s is actually a lil sad I didn’t intent that lmao

🎃 A/n!! - Hello!!! Thank you so much for the ask, I’m currently working on another ask, but thought that I should get this one out before Halloween ends! If I don’t manage to, I’m sincerely sorry, but I hope you enjoy this anyways! I also haven’t been to any of the haunted houses I mention, so if the experience is inaccurate I apologize hehe. Have a happy Halloween to everyone who celebrates it, and a wonderful night to everyone who doesn’t!🫶🏻🤍

🍡Satoru🍡

Satoru is ALL FOR the idea

In fact, he was the one who brought it up. 

Going to a theme park to get a good scare, AND have his girlfriend cling to his arm the whole night?

That’s a plan if he’s ever heard one. 

“You can hold onto me if you get scared, love~”

Y/n looks up at Satoru, a smile playing on her lips. “Me? Are you sure you won’t get scared, Toru?”

Satoru laughs, waving off the idea with his hand. “You kidding, love?! I’m the strongest, how could I get scared?”

He’s eating his words by the third haunted house. 

The first was alright, just an alien invasion walk through, which he found himself practically flying through. 

You, in the other hand, took his offer to your advantage, and held onto his arm every time a slimy animatronic creature popped out of the wall. 

“Don’t look so smug, Toru,” y/n scoffs as they walk out of the first haunted house, her heart still racing a bit. 

“I don’t even need my 6 eyes to tell that you’re scared, baby! It’s okay to admit I was right—I usually am,” Satoru smiles, leaning down to kiss her cheek, only to be met with a scowl. 

“Whatever…”

Boy are you happy when you both enter an exorcist themed haunted house, and Satoru’s body stiffens significantly beside you. 

It’s dark, and thick fog fills the house as you both walk through. 

There’s screaming and growling in the distance, which seems to move around the house. 

You’re holding onto Satoru’s arm even tighter, but his smug smile is nowhere to be seen.

The last room of the house comes into view, a wave of relief washing over the couple as they walk eagerly to the door. 

When Satoru twists the handle, the old wood creaking loudly, an actor dressed as a priest jumps out. 

“Help! Help!” The man screams, his white collar stained with blood. He’s then seemingly dragged to the side of the room, a growl emitting from the corner. 

Satoru walks hesitantly inside, y/n clinging to his side. Another actor, a little girl resembling the same one in the movie this house took inspiration from, is standing over the priest, blood and black liquid dripping from her mouth. 

Y/n screams, running towards the exit on the other side of the room. She drags Satoru along, his face pale and frozen in fear. 

Yk the face Satoru pulled when he first met Megumi? 

Yeah, that’s what he looks like when you both leave the haunted house. 

He can feel his heart beating rapidly, but puts on a brave face for you, of course. 

That is, until the third, and last house of the night. 

You insisted, since the haunt was based off of the show “The Last of Us”, and you both had watched it earlier that year

But little did you know, Satoru was nervously biting the inside of his cheek each episode.

But how could he say no to you when you looked so sweet, looking up at him with those adorable eyes of yours???

“Last one. It’s…getting late.”

Y/n looks up at Satoru as they both walk towards the, apparently, last house of the night. 

“Don’t tell me you’re scared, Satoru Gojo,” she smiles, reaching a finger up to poke his cheek. 

He grabs her hand, stopping her from touching his face. “Don’t tease me, love, you can’t talk,” he says, putting her finger between his teeth. 

“Shut up!” Y/n pouts, pulling her finger back. 

“Trust me, you’re going to want to leave after this one,” Satoru says, looking up at the large haunted attraction they’re about to enter. 

Satoru thinks he’s got everything together when you first walk in, more interested in the set they’ve built and how accurate it is to the show

Until the first clicker pops out and he’s brought back to the scenes of the show that made him nearly jump off of the couch. 

He quite literally screams like a little girl, his mask falling off, which only blinds the actor decorated in the costume that scared Satoru in the first place. 

Now they’re both screaming, and you’re off to the side with a shell-shocked expression, wondering to yourself how this even happened. 

“Baby…don’t be mad, please?”

“Satoru…” you grumble, looking out the window of his car, “we’re banned for life…”

“Honestly…” he sighs, “wasn’t even thinking of going back after that.”

Y/n glares at him from the passenger seat, her arms crossed over her chest. But when she remembers the screams of her boyfriend, the actor, and a little boy behind them who happened to witness the incident, a snort escapes her lips. 

“You’re such a dork,” she laughs, leaning over the center console to grab his hand, kissing his knuckles. “I didn’t want to go back after the first house anyways.”

🫀Sukuna🫀

He is not amused one bit.

Why the hell would humans create a whole event just to dress up and scare themselves? It’s stupid!

But when you ask him so sweetly to attend with you, he can’t find it in himself to say no.

“This night will be a waste of time,” Sukuna grumbles down at y/n as they walk around the crowded amusement park, actors dressed as demons, vampires, clowns, and zombies jumping out to scare people.

When one of them, a man in an elaborate clown getup, comes up screaming, honking a horn in y/n’s face, Sukuna can feel his anger boil. It takes every ounce of his cursed-being, and a harsh squeeze of his hand from his girlfriend, for him to compose himself and walk away.

“Sukuna, do not—“

“What were they thinking?! Getting in your face, invading your space like that!” He grumbles, his hand still in y/n’s. “Assholes…”

You decide to take him into a haunted house, hoping it’ll be a little less invasive.

There are various options every year, but you’re happy that this year includes a movie you both watched, and Sukuna didn’t seem too annoyed by:

Beetlejuice.

He even chuckled a few times!

“Oh? That movie? Yes, I remember,” Sukuna says, recounting the movie as soon as y/n points to the cryptic house in the distance.

Surprisingly, it doesn’t take much effort for her to take him inside of the attraction; he was practically the one dragging her in, actually.

With a wicked smile, Sukuna looks at the surroundings of the house as music blares through hidden speakers, the familiar purple and green theme of the movie throughout. He holds y/n’s hand while walking through the halls, seemingly unfazed by the actor leading them through, and the animatronics jumping out at every corner to scare them.

He starts to feel his distaste for ‘frivolous human events’ quickly turns to amusement when y/n practically clings to him even more throughout the house. Every jumpscare, loud noise, or enthusiastic actor that pops out and sends waves of fear through her body no longer gets a death stare from Sukuna; rather, he finds himself laughing at the little effort it takes his girlfriend, relishing in the feeling of priority he gets every time she squeezes his fingers or bicep.

When they come towards the end of the house, and the infamous character of Beetlejuice comes out himself, y/n is initially really giddy and pulling Sukuna towards him to take a picture.

But when they go, one of the huge, iconic sandworms from the movie pops out in front of them. That, including the cackling laughs of the actor portraying Beetlejuice, elicit a horrified scream from y/n, while Sukuna is openly chuckling as she pulls him out.

He’s shaking his head as you both leave, but can’t help the small smile on his face when he looks down to see you still holding onto his muscular arm.

You’re even laughing now, telling him how much of a thrill that was.

He thinks he’s starting to understand why humans come to places like this by the time the moon has risen high in the sky, and a glint of exhaustion sparkles in your eyes.

As the car drives down the nearly empty highway, soft music playing from the radio, y/n leans her head on the window. Her eyes flutter closed every few moments, the memories of that night flashing in her mind.

“Hey, brat,” sukuna calls softly from the driver’s seat, his hand gripping the steering wheel, “you’re that tired, huh?”

Y/n lifts her head, looking over at her boyfriend in the sliver of moonlight pouring through his window.

“Yeah,” she hums, resting her hand atop his on the center console, “I had a lot of find today, Kuna.”

Sukuna thinks about suppressing his smile as he usually does, but when he looks over at y/n and sees her sleepy eyes, he can’t. She won’t even remember this tomorrow, he thinks.

“I did too, surprisingly.”

Y/n lifts her head slightly, a smile slowly forming on her lips. “You did?” She asks. “You really did?”

“I really did,” Sukuna sighs, looking at the road ahead. “Human’s aren’t entirely stupid, I suppose; but the whole Halloween tradition is still meaningless to me.”

Y/n giggles, rubbing her thumb over his knuckles. “So you’ll go with me again next year?”

Sukuna turns his head to look at her, a flash of amusement in his eyes. She wants to go again?

“Silly girl,” he smiles, lifting her hand up to his lips, “you want to indulge in something that made you shake in terror again?”

Y/n shrugs her shoulders, blushing a bit at the feeling of his lips against her skin.

“You scare me, but I come back to you every night, don’t I?”

“Hmm…you’re very right, little lamb.”

⭐️Yuji⭐️

Another boy who’s all for it

He’s actually been to many Halloween themed parks ever since he was a kid, his grandpa usually taking him. 

“He was a sucker for a good scare!” He’d tell you, an enthusiastic smile on his face. 

Sobbing and crying. 

So ofc, you’re putting on your bravest face the whole time in order not to ruin his night. 

“Babe! Babe! Look, there’s a house for stranger things! And the Exorcist, annnnd Chucky! We have to go to the Chucky one, please baby?!”

Y/n, looking around with a subtle sweat building at her hairline, sends him the best smile she can. “Y-yeah! Let’s go, Yuj…”

Yuji takes his girlfriend’s hand, dragging her along like a kid in a candy store. He points out each detail of the park, screaming and cackling every time an actor jumps out to scare both of them. 

Y/n on the other hand…is a mess on the inside. She uses every ounce of her being to put on a smile, and force out those breathy-fake laughs she hates doing so much. 

But it’s all worth it each time she sees Yuji’s perfect smile, or hears his infectious laugh. 

Yuji drags you to the Chucky attraction first, a giddy pep to his step. 

You’re trying not to shake too much as screaming and music boom from inside the house, grabbing onto your boyfriend’s hand tightly. 

But of course, your sweet, sweet baby Yuji only takes this as your equal excitement, dragging you faster towards the house. 

The walls are painted bright shades of yellow, red, blue, and decorated with various pictures of the doll the house is based on, music and childish laughter flowing through the speakers hidden throughout. 

“Woah! Look at how elaborate this place is!” Yuji couldn’t be more excited, looking around with his big, curious, brown eyes, and a smile. 

But y/n, she can only focus on the anxiety creeping up her spine as they walk through the maze-like halls, a constant feeling of fear nagging at her. She tries to shove it down, but each and every time the red-headed demonic doll pops out of the walls or paintings, she can’t help but scream like a little girl. 

Yuji doesn’t really notice, too busy screaming and laughing himself; only, he’s thrilled to have the constant rush of fear flowing through him. 

Y/n, standing next to him and squeezing his hand, is starting to chip away at her pride and confidence. 

It isn’t until the stranger things haunted house that Yuji realizes something is wrong with the way you’re acting. 

Throughout the first half of the tour, you seem fine, gazing at the LED lights and elaborate set pieces that are so similar to the show

But when the first loud bang, and cloud of thick fog, rolls in, he can practically feel you shaking next to him. 

“Baby…are you okay?”

Y/n looks up, Yuji’s face illuminated by the red LED lights surrounding them. “Yeah, what are you talking about, Yuji?” She smiles back at him, swinging their arms together in between them as they walk. 

Yuji decides not to push her any further, instead continuing down the twisting halls of the haunted house. 

But when they both turn a corner, and a large demogorgon rips through a slimy, grotesque ‘portal’ in the wall, y/n looses all confidence, her terrified state finally coming to fruition. 

This time, Yuji isn’t laughing at the high-tech animatronic jump scares. It takes one glance over at his pretty girlfriend’s face twisted in a genuinely horrified scream for him to pick her up bridal style, and run towards the exit. 

It takes at least five minutes of you reassuring him your fine before he puts you back down lmao

He’s so worried, pressing his fingers to your pulse every few minutes to check if your heart is slowing down. 

He genuinely feels so so bad for not noticing your fear sooner, feeling like the worst boyfriend ever. 

But you assure him it was you who didn’t want to show your fear, putting on a face for him. 

“But…why didn’t you just tell me, y/n? We could’ve left way earlier!”

Y/n looks down at the wooden picnic table they snagged, picking at the decrepit wood. “I know…but you were so excited, and I didn’t want to be a big baby about it.”

Yuji’s heart breaks, and he leans over to wrap his arms around you tightly. “Baby, please, you could never be a big baby about anything,” he says into her hair, “if you’re scared of something, hell, I’m terrified of it. We never have to come back again.”

Y/n pulls away, looking into his eyes. “No, no, Yuji, we can’t! You love this place, we can—“

“No,” yuji pouts dramatically, now acting as if he was the one who was scared out of his mind a minute ago, “I’m scared. I wanna leave.”

“Yuj—“

“Please?”

Yuji looks at y/n with those damn puppy eyes, and she can’t help but laugh. “You’re a dork, you know that?”

Yuji just smiles. “For you, and only you, my looooveeee,” he says, dragging out his words for emphasis. 

As they both walk back to the parking lot, looking for Yuji’s car, y/n looks back at the amusement park in the distance. 

“You sure it’s okay we leave, Yuji? I know you and your grandpa came here every year…”

Yuji stops, his pink hair blowing in the night wind as he looks down at his perfect girlfriend. He smiles, and ruffles the top of her hair. 

“Yeah, well my grandpa would much rather me spend my time with the love of my life than at a stupid theme park that’ll come back next year,” he says wholeheartedly. “He would have loved you more than a stupid tradition.”

🫐Megumi🫐

Okay, be warned, if you take this man to any kind of theme park, he’s GOING to be that nonchalant-doesn’t gaf kinda guy

So when you decide to take him to Halloween Horror Nights, you’re expecting the same kind of behavior from him. 

BUT NO!

This man is on guard from the moment you both get through the gates

He was complaining about how expensive the tickets were, before he stopped and looked around, eyes wide and completely silent. 

“Megs? Are you okay?”

Megumi is too concerned with the man in an elaborate zombie costume a few feet away, his eyes slanted. Y/n recognizes the look in his eyes as the look he has when he senses cursed energy in an area they’re in. 

But when he takes her hand ever so subtly, she knows that isn’t the case. 

“Are you…scared, honey?” She asks in a hushed tone, holding back a laugh. 

Megumi’s azure eyes dart down to hers, his lips forming a thin line. “Y/n…” he says in a warning tone. 

“What?” She exclaims. “I’m a little nervous too, don’t worry baby—“

“I’m not scared.”

That man does not want to admit he’s scared JSHEBSIWVVW

But by the time it gets darker, and you both start walking around more parts of the park, stakes start rising. 

Actors in makeup and costumes jump out and chase you both, eliciting screams and laughs from you, but DEATH STARES from your poor boyfriend🥲

“Megumi! Stop looking at them like that when they scare us!” 

Megumi looks at y/n, an annoyed huff escaping his lips. He opens his mouth to say something, but a man in clown makeup and a colorful-bloody costume slides past them, honking a loud horn in both of their faces. 

Y/n jumps, squeezing Megumi’s hand, while he practically yanks her into his arms, almost resembling a cat when it’s fur puffs up in fear.

“Megs—“

“Let’s go to the ice cream stand.”

He’ll say he wants to get a food item from every food stand you both pass, but in reality he just knows the actors can’t get too close to them there HAHAHAH.

He’ll end up spending all of his money (that Gojo gave him for his ‘little date’) on drinks and food for you both. 

You’re not complaining, thinking it’s cute that your strong-brave-sorcerer boyfriend is scared of humans in costumes. 

That is until he’s down to only a few bucks, and you both know you can’t avoid the park anymore. 

“Megumi, do you want to go back home? We don’t have to stay if you don’t want to,” y/n whispers in her boyfriend’s ear, pulling him into a secluded alley. 

He looks down at her, bringing a soft hand up to her cheek. “Baby, I don’t want to ruin your fun,” he says, genuine guilt in his tone. But she can also sense the anxiety and fear in his touch.

Y/n smiles, putting her hand on the back of his caressing her cheek. “Honey, my night won’t be ruined as long as you’re here with me,” she whispers. “It’s no fun when one of us is having a good time and the other is scared.”

For the first time that night, Megumi smiles, leaning down to kiss y/n’s forehead gratefully. 

“Okay, baby…let’s go home and watch that one movie you wanted to—what was it called?”

Y/n’s eyes light up, an enthusiastic sparkle in them.

“Terrifier!”

Megumi’s faces falls a bit, but being scared by a movie on the couch with his girlfriend is way better than being jumpscared by strangers in costumes.

“Yes, that one.”

Special thanks to @gamer-kat for the amazing request!! Hope you enjoyed ml🩷

[lexi-the-demon-69]

Give me your relationship headcanons for Dark Choco and Dark Cacao immediately

Oh, man, I have too many awful headcanons for their relationship. I personally don't really like how so many people portray their relationship as wholesome when... it's really not. To me, their relationship was doomed from the start because Dark Cacao is just too busy and mentally unstable to even be a parent. I'm obviously not gonna mention my "Dark Cacao forgot his son's 5th birthday" headcanon again, so I'll just start with my other headcanons lol.

-----

1.) When Dark Choco was a child, he was left alone for days, with no one to look after him except for the watchers and a handful of servants here and there. The only time he would even get to see Dark Cacao was for training or studying to become a great king, just like him. The constant absence of Dark Cacao has left Dark Choco with very bad abandonment problems and an inferiority complex.

2.) After "The Birthday Incident" (*cough cough* Dark Cacao forgetting his son's 5th birthday *cough cough*), Dark Cacao decides to assign three maids to Dark Choco to entertain him and keep him company. Whenever Dark Cacao was too busy to be with his son, the maids would attend to the little prince to make him feel loved. If anything, Dark Choco still considers those maids as more parental figures than his own father to this very day.

3.) Whenever Dark Choco didn't do well on a training exercise or test, Dark Cacao would always ask his son why didn't he do better? Why didn't he go the extra mile to succeed like he did when he was his son's age? This behavior still persisted, even when Dark Choco did really well. Why didn't he get a perfect score? Why didn't he try harder? Dark Choco could never fully please Dark Cacao, never fulfilling his desire for a perfect heir who was just like him. To this day, Dark Choco has a constant fear of not being good enough.

4.) In the present, Dark Cacao and Dark Choco's relationship still hasn't fully healed. Many would even mistake them as brothers who constantly argue and fight, not father and son. Dark Cacao hasn't fully come to terms that he hasn't been a good father to Dark Choco, and Dark Choco is gaslighting himself into believing he forgives his father when he really doesn't. Dark Cacao hasn't shown him that he has changed his ways yet.

5.) As I've mentioned before, Dark Cacao and Dark Choco constantly bicker and fight with one another, even over the smallest things. Whether it be a traumatic memory or which path they need to take, an argument will start. Guess who's the one who defaults to calling the other one names... yeah, it's Dark Choco. It's somewhat hinted in Kingdom that Dark Choco has a smug, snarky side to him and it will show whenever he argues with Dark Cacao.

"I have ripped your eye out once, I can rip that tongue out as well!" "I can only hope your back doesn't rip out of place while you make an attempt..."

------

I have so many more headcanons of these two, but I don't really feel like typing anymore lol.

[herefortheships]

Lydia looks so smug when Betelgeuse is about to have Rory killed, like she's thinking "this is what my man is willing to do for me, bitch" 😆 And yet she's afraid of him? Nah, that's her excuse to push Beej away. Anyone familiar with romance arc structure? Looking at it specifically through the Romancing the Beat structure, I feel like, if applied to BJBJ, the story left Lydia in the "Retreating from love" beat. I'll have to review the beat sheet and rewatch the movie with romance arc structure in mind to make sure, but I think she made her fear-based choice to reject love in BJBJ by banishing Betelgeuse.

Not saying that BJ3 will start with her Dark Night of the Soul (though she did look sad or one could say regretful after banishing him. She's looking at the floor with a furrowed brow, like she's conflicted). BJ3 might retrace earlier beats more solidly, or go into the beats BJBJ might have skipped, because this is a romance arc in a horror-comedy, so it wouldn't follow a traditional romance structure, I guess (they might also write in a romance arc intentionally in BJ3, if they didn't already write in the romance arc intentionally in this one. Personally I think they so did. lol I get the vibe Burton and co wanted to plant the idea in this movie and end the series with the two of them together. They're testing the waters, basically).

//EDIT: ACTUALLY they might still be in either the Set up or the Falling in Love's "No way" beat, in which Lydia has pretty much stated why she's not falling in love (she didn't say it literally, of course, just her actions lol), and specifically NOT with Betelgeuse (this one she did verbalize, as I'll write bellow. Things she said about him: he's a stalker, a trickster demon, "bad things will happen" if he's here, etc). They might have been entering the Falling in Love part of the arc, and yet I think the story took her right to the Retreating from Love beat at the end, because she did banish him. But he's still around, so they might still be here at the Set up or Falling in love parts of the arc? 👀 Anyway, I'll break it down eventually and write a romance arc beat sheet for them.//

This is how Lydia's rationalizing her fear-based rejection of love: "He's literally evil and will use me and leave me". And "there's an age gap, it wouldn't have worked out between us anyway". She's protecting her heart from being hurt again. The fear of him leaving might come from her past relationships failing; one could even bring up how Richard left her to go on his Amazon adventure, when their relationship failed. Then Richard ended up dying in that trip and left her forever (because she can't even see his ghost). Then her mention of the age gap, that might have just been her looking for the easiest way out, to reject him without even trying to give him a chance after seeing that he might not be that bad after all.

Anyway, I'll rewatch the movie and create a romance arc beat sheet for these two. Just because I'm a nerd and it'll be fun. 😂 I'll see how many romance story beats were actually used and how many we have yet to go into with these two until endgame.

If there is a romance arc between them in BJBJ, then it's incomplete. Which means BJ3 will complete it, but I gotta push my hopes down. Let's not get our hopes up, but STILL I can't unsee what is there to see. lol

[golden-chiivalry]

luka tickle headcanons (chiivalry bday post)

🪸 ;; warnings -> luka is a warning himself LMAO, small angst, mentions of human experiments/testing, slight ooc

🪸 ;; authors note -> it’s my birthday today yippee!! (im like a minute late but shhhh, its still the 4th of september)

guess who got into ALNST recently lmao. i swear if i fall in love with one more blondie i will lose it (so far the list is aventurine, kaveh and luka).

as usual the format is general, lee and ler headcanons! feel requests are still open btw :3

🪸 ;; masterpost

🪸 ;; ao3

🪸 ;; general headcanons

just like his voice, his laughter is heavenly;

his laughter and reactions are quite restrained; he’s learned to control his heart rate because of heperu’s “tests”, and as a result, he learned how to control his reactions too;

but keep tickling him for a while and he’ll give you the cutest giggles and shy titters ever;

he doesn’t squirm around that much, surprisingly. no one knows why;

do be careful, after tickling him he gets pretty vengeful. and a vengeful luka is something wise men fear;

his tummy has just a tiny amount of pudge, squeeze that part and you’ll be rewarded trust;

he starts squeaking and squealing like a dog toy when you squeeze his tummy its adorable;

just don’t tell him that he sounds like a dog toy… its for the best;

🪸 ;; lee headcanons

oh no he’s hot :( ;

has the cutest laugh ever;

pretty ticklish if you target the right spots;

if luka trusts you a lot (which is pretty hard to achieve), he’ll struggle less when you tickle him. as in, he’ll actually let you do it;

remember how i mentioned his laugh being shy and all? i feel like he’d get rlly shy when tickled too;

like, he’s this famous persona, the previous ALNST winner, and a few poked get him giggling?? embarrassing… (for him anyways);

i think his worst spots would be tummy and ears/neck. maybe hips too idk;

he’s used to roughness because of heperu (fuck you heperu) so gentle tickling works best on him lol;

does get overwhelmed pretty quick so keep that in mind;

you know luka really trusts you if he willingly lets you tickle him (he hates being vulnerable);

🪸 ;; ler headcanons

his hands are cold as fuck and the smUG BASTARD USES THAT TO HIS ADVANTAGE >:( ;

he’s so mean. why are you so rude blondie;

luka knows every weak spot of his “victim”. he’s able to find it in seconds;

always teasing and taunting his lee. what a jerk;

tickling from him is different depending on what you did; if he feels like tickling you for the sake of it, he’ll be somewhat gentle. but if you tickled him first? rip buddy, r.i.p;

asshole alert asshole alert asshole alert;

y’all remember that moment when he kissed the microphone? yeah he’ll definitely bully his s/o with ticklish kisses (bastard pt2);

he’s a manipulative little shit chances are he’ll manipulate you into letting him tickle you lmao;

oh and did i mention he can hold you down with EASE. he’s a piece of shit when it comes to tickling people;

barely tickles anyone tho. thankfully ;

[summercreolefanfictioner]

the scent wafts in, her name making him beg on his knees BONUS CHAP 1

pairing: dabi / todoroki touya x fem!oc / reader (MODERN AU)

summary: she was on a date, yet another man captivated her heart with his beautiful blue gaze (fem!oc-centric)

(in which Sonohara airs her side of story.)

themes: mentions of cheating, sex, alcohol, cigarettes etc YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

notes: forgive me for errors; I just had to post due to my excitement lol sonohara's pov gives so much insights on how the two of them started and I like romance bcos I am just a girl 💅

------

She didn't know what she did to be stared upon by the most beautiful pair of blue eyes—cold, intense, piercing her like blades halted in time and she was too slow to get away from them. She was sitting alone in the middle of the bar, her boyfriend doing the same shitty lame of an excuse about his stomachache and going to the toilet when she knew he was doing someone out there, probably screwing with a random woman until her senses go wild and hazy and she knows this woman wouldn't be able to walk back to the bar and he'd be feeling refreshed with that smug face like an accomplishment; like another earned medal in his collection of awards.

It was one thing to accuse one's boyfriend of cheating; it was another thing to know it was true.

High school was her supposed spring of bloom, a newfound romance with her boyfriend bore fruit and it had been bliss. Had... had it been for him to change his mind afterwards. It was like the songs. Young love doesn't last forever, everyone's always out to chase the thrill—just like him. They exchanged a lot of promises before, about being each other's "only" and "forever," but he quickly forgot about those the moment they went separate ways during college. They met new people in their perspective universities, and while she still had her heart in his hands, it only took him a while before he started becoming so secretive, so easily annoyed when she voices out her opinions, and so distracted and uninterested when she tells him about her day. She tried confronting him, but he would immediately shot down her accusations, that it was all in her head; that she was making up things to fight about.

She wanted to lie, to stay because he comes around and makes her hope that he had changed and he finally realized she was the one he truly needed. Life was not a story of boy changes himself because of a girl. Life was boy decides to break the girl's heart because he knew he can. This was her painful reality.

"I want to break up with him... He... I saw him cheating on me... many times already."

"What are you talking about? Think about your future for once! He's from a well-off family, and he earns so much as an architect. Be grateful he's still coming back to you. Those women are just flings. Sex and love are two different things!"

Those were the things her mom said, all because she doesn't see anything redeeming about her (not that she cared, honestly; she never had the thought of earning anyone's approval anyway). Realizing this twisted routine became her new normal, she feared breaking up. She feared bringing the topic to light because she got used to him being around despite not caring anymore if he went out on a few dates with someone else while he's at work elsewhere or having sex with a random stranger he met. She lost it in her to care, to savor the true love she wanted.

It wasn't love. The love has already faded. It was just her scared of a life without this normal chaos.

Until this one man with the pair of beautiful blue eyes, unruly dark hair, mysterious boyish charm, and dangerous vibes sat in front of her; on the same seat her boyfriend should've been if he wasn't so busy doing something (rather someone) else. He was quite rugged, punk rock style encasing his charm, and with the heavy scent of whiskey and mint lingering around him. She wanted to squint her nose so bad at the smell, but that would be a bit rude, though. Nonetheless, he was boyishly handsome in her book, an enigma of a man whose features did not coincide with the traditional "handsome Japanese guy."

I bet he looks more handsome with a lighter hair color.

"You don't fit in here," he said coldly, his nonchalant tone evident as how he stared at her like he was staring straight through her soul; like he was judging her entirety with every fiber of his being.

Honestly, she couldn't argue wtih him, especially when it was true. She didn't fit in here; she didn't want to be here in the first place, if not for her boyfriend who insisted she should try going to a bar to celebrate her promotion at work. And much to her surprise, this man in front of her was a lot nicer than he looks—even gave her his leather jacket, making all the burnt scars across his body visible. Some girls around her even gawk at the sight of his perfectly toned muscles because my oh my, he was ripped. RIPPED TO THE CORE. She was sure she had only seen men like these in the movies, but for this man to talk to someone like her, it was like a dream.

This is just a silly crush, okay? No big deal. Stop acting like a schoolgirl.

Afterwards, he told her to come with him and his friends outside where they could watch a romance movie and have a smoke. Well, a weaker part of her wanted to, like she was so willing for this man to just take her somewhere far away from here and never return to her morbid reality; the rational part of her warned her not to be rude, that she still has her date out there. So, she declines, a lump in her chest with the way she lied about her boyfriend's whereabouts. That he was having a stomachache or something. How foolish a girl can be.

"Are you sure you want to go by that answer?"

Of course, she was not. So when he grabbed his keys and held her hand, she already that this guy, whatever his name was, already had her heart in his hands. This was cruel; this was thrilling; this was making her happy and guilty for it. Attraction and temptation were two devils conniving to begin her downfall as she took in the way his warm and rough hand was so gentle as he guided her to his car. Even the stares he gave her when she and Himiko were watching the movie was too much for her heart, scolding herself mentally for not being able to control her emotions. At the same time, she would reason out, It's all his and his beautiful, mysterious eyes' fault that I am this way. He should stop being beautiful, at least.

When he left them to take a hit of his cigarette, they watched the movie quietly. It was a comfortable silence until Himiko affirmed the emotions burning in her.

"You like Dabi," the blonde stated with a sneaky smile, the same Cheshire cat thingy that she quite loathed at the moment.

"Da—who?"

Himiko rolled her eyes. "Dabi! The guy with the dark hair. You like him. You keep on ogling him, Sahara-chan!"

It was out in the open, and all she could do was blush in embarrassment. Well, there's no harm telling about Himiko everything, right? She's never had a friend aside from her older sister, so might as well have someone who'll listen to her pour out her real feelings.

"About earlier, I also like romance, Toga-chan," she started, seeing how Himiko was invested in whatever she wanted to say. "I just think romance does not suit me. I have a crush on..." she momentarily forgot the man's name, "him... but, you see, my boyfriend... even if I don't love him anymore, I don't know how to leave him."

"Shouldn't it be easy, though? You just tell him you're done with him and his bullshit," Himiko argued, shocking her with her vulgar words. "I don't know about the real details, but I heard him and Jin talk earlier and they said that jackass was having sex with one of the cocktail servers."

Right. Of course, he would. He had always done that before; have sex with someone while on a date with her.

"I am scared of the future. I am scared of the next step. He had been a constant even if I don't want him around. My life has stability as long as he is around."

Because once I break off things, my mom would never hear the end of it. People will talk. His parents will beg me to take him back no matter what. My father will do nothing about it like he always does. And that guy... he would take control of things to make himself look good. He does that everytime. I never win. I will always be in the wrong, after all.

"But... don't you want to be happy?" Himiko suggested. "I bet Dabi will make you happy."

"Huh?"

And before they could talk about it more, the guys have returned inside the car, and they all proceeded to watch the movie again. The more she watched the movie, the more she could relate to both the female characters. The feeling of wanting freedom was so liberating, and the feeling of wanting to be right was not in her favor. She sighed, and when she accidentally looked at the rear mirror, the man was staring at her.

She quickly looked away. Why is he staring? Has he been watching me?

And when he insisted to drive her home, she knew she had to mention that damn guy forcibly even though he was already out of the picture. She just had to, because this was all wrong. She should be catching feelings once she's single, and yet she still has no idea when that will happen. But nonetheless, being alone with this man who calls himself Dabi was so, so, so, soooo wrong. WRONG. WRONG. WRONG!

They had an argument at first, with him suddenly pulling her out of his car and sneering at her as he trapped her against a nearby wall. She was supposed to be scared, to be frightened at the proximity of him leaning close to her ear as the smell of cigarettes kept suffocating her. But she held herself, maintained her composure, and did not cry or blush.

"I can walk from here. Thank you again, Dabi-kun. Please send my regards to Twice-san and Toga-chan."

But "Dabi" did not let her go, still drove her home and even walked her to her door. That guy has never done that to her, but this man did. It was new. It was a fresh breath of air. It was a miracle to know yhat there were still men like him out there. And as she went inside, she held his jacket close to her body, imagining herself being trapped against that wall. She should've returned the jacket and go back to her sad reality without this Dabi or whoever he said he was (because she couldn't believe he was born with a name that means cremation.) But no; she wanted a piece of her own delusion.

She will take a dip, hoping she won't get burned later on.

next chapter

masterlist

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

If humans are good and the Na'vi have no reason to fear them, do you think the Na'vi might suffer from. Like. Cuteness agression?

Like how we are with kittens. Ever seen a video of like a sleepy kitten? Just an eepy kitty? Such a cute little ball of fur that is so cute i want to start putting kicking and punching things. That but w humans

Human: *is tired and takes a nap in the most comfy place they can find*

Unfortunate Na'vi: oh my Eywa theyre so small they're using a leaf as a blanket oh my Eywa

How else can humans be cute?? Hmm

Imagine them w human babies( projecting Spider rn.)

Just holding this tiny, helpless little creature in palm of your hand?? It trying to put your fingers into its mouth? It giggling at something you did? Idk abt yall but i thoroughly enjoy being a babys fav person and the Na'vi would also. No better feeling than a baby preferring you over anyone else.

THIS IS SO FUNNY. I love like, healthy cultural differences but we do need to focus more on humans being literal aliens. The Na'vi are like oH MY GOD SPACE PEOPLE- oh but they're... so small.

Even in a relationship between the two species, there would just be stuff. Like a Na'vi obsessing over how small and cute a humans fingers are, just like making them compare hand sizes all the time and playing with their little fingers lol.

Idk about you guys, but if I know even the slightest thing about a subject I cannot stop myself from interjecting as though I am the worlds foremost expert if someone mentions it. So like a Na'vi has a human mate or something, and introduces them to a Na'vi of another clan that has never met a person. They're like "Wow your hair is brown! I've never seen that!" and the Na'vi mate butts in like "It can actually be any color." Like slightly wrong but so eager to share information lol. What telephone game style rumors would be spread to far reaching clans via the Na'vi lol?

As for the babies, well that's what for the nights and days of life is for. Spider being literally the entire clans fav and Neytiri who is still actively uncomfy with him is still smug about being his favorite.

[pavardscherie]

― what i deserve ;; pablo gavi & pedri gonzalez ;; first snippet

⤷ pairing: pablo gavi x f!reader ;; pedri gonzalez x f!reader ⤷ summary: your relationship with gavi ended after he cheated on you. a year has passed, pedri always checked up on you with small messages until he invited you to one of the home games. somewhere between losing your heart to pedri; gavi still attempts to get you back. ⤷ warnings: curse words ;; injuries ;; mentions of blood ;; hand around throat ;; explicit sex scenes ;; asshole!gavi ;; cheating ;; violence in fights ;; spanking ;; dom & sub ;; dirty talk ;; teasing ;; very deep feelings & conversations ;; slight triangle thing but not most of the time ;; second chances kinda ;; friends to lovers ;; not proofread & probably horrible written kiss scenes lol ⤷ izzy's non-sense talk: a little, first snippet of what's coming, soon soon. my obsession with pedri is becoming unhealthy. loved the responses on the pov, so we're starting this & i really hope, the responses are good lol

Gavi was forced to watch, how Pedri's strong arms engulfed you in a comfortable, and tight hug. Lips pursed, blowing gentle kisses on the crown of your hair. Lips stretched out, a sweet smile appearing on your crimson-red colored mouth.

He never felt anxious around people, being in the middle of a crowd always was a large part of his current occupancy. But he was, as soon as you appeared close, and yet, so out of reach, to him.

Before you stepped into his life again, Gavi didn’t miss an inch of you. And even if it sounded brutal to state speak the truth, as the fame rose around the midfielder, he quietly enjoyed the attention of multiple women more than being bound to one. He was too young, too dumb to even realize what he threw away.

You could be in the middle of the stands, like the past games, wearing a jersey with his name on the back, with his number, and screaming his name so loud and cheerful. Instead, Pedri’s name decorated the Barcelona jersey, and he dedicated each goal to you after the Pedri Potter gesture. A heart in your direction, giving Gavi a reason for the aching pain in his chest afterwards.

It was brutal to see Pedri with you, he wished him the entire happiness of the world — just not with you by his side. You belonged to him first, his property, he marked all the places Pedri touched at night. The thin material of his jersey in one hand, Gavi pulled it up to wipe away the beads of sweat across his face.

And yet, he did not think about the fact that he flashed his trained stomach to the cameras, and the quick glance of your eyes in his direction. Merely seconds to take in the muscular package, before your attention focused completely on Pedri’s gentle touch again. Unfortunately for you, your gaze drifted way too slowly over Gavi’s frame, and he caught the small glance. Lips curled, a smug smirk plastered across his face when he realized, you still felt something, anything, for him.

A little spark must still burn in the pit of stomach, in the far corner of your chest, when he stepped into the room. The cold mask you applied over your sweet face for him didn’t match the genuine personality your carried like featherlight weight on your shoulders.

But Gavi walked out on you way too many times, taking a piece of your love with him each night. You wasted all your tears on him, until they dried quicker than they could fall down your cheeks. Somehow, over the months, it became easier for you to say goodbye to people than greet them in your life. You never wanted to feel this kind of pain again, attempted to lock yourself away from any feeling related to loving someone, because the fear of being pushed into the dirt over again, would be too much for your innocent soul.

Unfortunately, your plans failed ultimately when you accepted the first invitation to the game at Camp Nou. Pedri declined the choice you made, breaking down walls that were created over months, and opening his arms to let you fall again. What a fool you were, to believe, you could avoid Gavi, ignore his presence, or completely forget the feeling that still lingered, locked away, inside of you.

But he broke your heart too often, too careless; and the chance of winning you back slipped away when he walked out the door of your apartment that one night.

Rough fingertips placed underneath your chin, tilting your head upward to connect your unfocused gaze with Pedri's attentive stare. "Am I allowed to kiss you, or do you fear getting called my girlfriend by the newspapers?" The question was a gentle whisper, not just asking for your permission but also, the desire of wanting to know your deeper thoughts about what happened between the two of you.

Declining the gesture, the addictive taste of his pillow-like lips; would cause an unwanted amount of friction; and new questions in Pedri's head about what your honest intentions with him were. Accepting the kiss without sharing a doubt would put a title over your person, giving the confused fans and reporters exactly what they wanted for another headline about the popular midfielder.

It would cause Gavi at least a slight amount of pain, a piercing pain in his chest while witnessing the loving interaction between his best friend, and the woman he refused to keep by his side.

And somehow, the last thought of fucking up Gavi's confidence, his unchanging opinion about getting you back without doing anything, gave you enough confidence to stand on your tip-toes, lipstick-covered lips pressed against Pedri's. His arm draped over your shoulders, pulling you into his chest within the first second and gently kissing you back.

The fans that stayed behind for the celebration, hoping to capture the attention of one of the younger players, shared their opinions with loud screams and cheers. Words flew through the warm evening air but never reached your ears. The camera's around the pitch clicked, taking multiple pictures with flashlights to capture the perfect moment of the surprising action.

All over the newspapers, where you never wanted to read your name or see your face. Yet, you felt a warm, comforting feeling bubble in your stomach as Pedri pulled you as close as possible.

[zukkacore]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

ANYTHING ANYTHING AT ALL ABOUT THE LOVERS UNIVERSE OR ANYTHING AT ALL

Hiiiii truly sorry friend this literally took so long!!!!!!!!!!!! b/c i sat here wracking my brain abt what tf i wanted to talk abt and i got all distracted by wanting to finish Biggest Lie and. i decided to just do what i did last time and. Just go over everything that was a reference or not to something else within Almost b/c I do think that is the easiest way to comb over this gd fic from head to toe. If i don't finish in one go I'll just reblog w/ additions and tag you in

"You're in love, aren't you?" / "You've been sighing all day" I've talked about this before, it's actually a pull from Howl's moving castle. Easily one of the most shameless things i've pilfered and it doesnt even really have a meaning, I just think the exchange is funny.

When J2 approaches, Porter Cliffbreaker lights up with the most insufferable, self-satisfied grin J2’s ever seen in his short life. “You’re early,” he practically purrs. - (In ch 3 for context. This is Porter seeing J2 for the first time.) Obviously we're continuing the Hadestown motif of "you're early" "I missed you". This is again part of the Porter n Jace whole Thing of like. Jace breaking up with him (not in the Big Break but you know). Obviously part of the reason Porter is being so smug is that he thinks Jace is coming crawling back to him. Lol. He thought, didn't he?

"I’m in the correct place, right?” / J2 turns to a tiefling girl in a plaid skirt and a ripped band shirt who is strapping bass guitar to her chest. “Hey, kid. Am I in the right class?” This is a weird pull but this is actually Twelfth Night to me, the scene where Viola first meets Olivia. I just think it's so funny when Viola comes in and doesn't know whether Maria or Olivia is the lady of the house. "The honorable lady of the house, which is she?" / "Most radiant, exquisite, and unmatchable beauty—I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house, for I never saw her. I would be loath to cast away my speech—" etc etc. There's a lot of Twelfth Night influence just b/c there's a lot of like mistaken identity stuff and being in love with someone while they're in love with someone else etc etc all that good stuff. I also think the scene where Viola has to woo olivia is just like. Hot. To be fair tho, J2 is kinda doing the opposite here, he's letting Porter down easy abt the breakup. It's a loose pull but i like the idea of J2 being so out of his element he doesn't even know he's in the right place.

“ What are you?” “I… can’t say. An olive branch? A… A best kept secret, maybe. Between you and the guy up top.” “A secret?” “A parting gift.” But also “What am I?” “That. But also why are you here? A beat. “I’m…” Finally, J2 settles on, “A messenger?” and “It’s—he wants to insist he’s not at war, here.” “Well, that’s a damn shame" is so this Twelfth Night exchange to me:

^^^ to elaborate (sorry i didn't wanna type it out): Idk the viola n olivia vibes in this whole scene not just this part are so flirtaeous and i liked the mentions of war and divinity. Like Porter is the god of war and yet the clones existing as this kind of olive branch. And there's this question of What J2 Is. And there isn't really an answer to that. I liked this idea of him being a secret. A gift. The line "to your ears divinity, to any others profanation" was just. ough.

I'll do this like. It's a big block of text so:

The fluorescence flickers. Mindless, as if purely out of routine, he makes his way over to the sink, to the cabinets full of mugs and glasses. J2 spots Jace’s immediately—it’s purple, with a slogan from his favorite podcast. He snatches it by the handle and throws it against the floor, where it shatters into a million pieces. He thinks about Jaceprime, and about being Dispelled. Despite the fear he can feel rising in his chest, making it hard to breathe, he thinks for another long moment. What a satisfying crash. He wonders if his fear of oblivion is unique to simulacra, or if it's something Jaceprime also has to grapple with every day. He wonders about the weird glowing gem in his chest, and how Jaceprime always refers to a time Before, with him and The Big Guy, but refuses to say outright what happened. He thinks about Porter—and of rage. He stares at the shattered pieces of the cup on the ground. And after a moment of serious contemplation, he grabs another mug off the shelf, and he does it again.

Anyway^^^: That's a reference to The Haunting of Hill House! Both the show and the movie. Theodora says it in both versions. Here's the anecdote I love so much:

“When I was a child,” Theodora said lazily, “—'many years ago,‟ Doctor, as you put it so tactfully—I was whipped for throwing a brick through a greenhouse roof. I remember I thought about it for a long time, remembering the whipping but remembering also the lovely crash, and after thinking about it very seriously I went out and did it again

The variation from the show also includes something along the lines about "I learned a lot about my own mother that day. Taught her, too." which I completely forgot is such a movie special but. I think was also so vital to why I loved that line and wanted to include a nod to it. Like. I've already talked about this but i wanna reiterate that I do not feel bad making motherhood comparisons w/ Jace and the clones b/c he is their creator! He is their frankenstein! Anyway, the imagery of like, getting satisfaction out of doing something destructive, and then doubling down out. Even if you get repercussions from your parent. Or maybe because of that. Maybe spite is the motivator. It was so striking. I think we tend to get this perception of J2 as this soft baby boy but this is one of my fav moments of his because it's so impotent and petulant. It's so him trashing a bathroom to have some semblance of power. J2 has so little power, but he can destroy Jace's favorite mug! (also, yes it was a complicated woman podcast mug. Also in IYWD Jace mentions the fact that he started bringing crappy mugs to work bc his kept disappearing and this was kinda a nod to that.)

"I—Fuck, Porter! Why don’t you just tell me what to do!" Ok, this is also pretty broad. Pulling from a few things here. I mean. This is very Pearl-coded to me. I still think about that scene to garnet where she says "I'm useless on my own. I need someone to tell me what to do". Also Please don't laugh, I have an old Hugh grant comedy that's my favorite and there's a scene where the son is having an argument w/ his mom and when he says "Because we never have any discussions, we have an argument, and you always win! Why don't you just tell me what to do" and she goes "Because I want you to think for yourself!" and then he's like fine then mom its not up to you if hugh grant is my friend even if he did pretend to have a two year old son so he could sleep with the single moms at the single parent support group. I love this movie btw. which i've already said like the paternal connotations to godhood mean i don't feel TOO bad when Porter's vibe gets weird and paternal. There's also a definite "I want someone to tell me what to wear in the morning. I want someone to tell me what to wear every morning fleabag vibe. I mean. Who said that.

“I—I’m not a consolation prize, Porter,” I think this is technically broad enough to not be a when harry met sally reference, but Sally does say this to Harry when he's trying to apologize to her and he's basically like "lol if neither of us have a date to the new york party we can go together" which. If that's not the vibe for whats going on. Filling in a spot because the other person is lonely.

“I want you. I’m only here for so long, and all I know is. I like you, ok?” and “I think you’re right.” J2 is working to keep his voice steady. “We both know that I was made for you. Literally. But more importantly… I like you. I know that much.” This is such a weird pull but this is such a Parks and Rec "I love you and I like you" (evil version) for me. I think there's such an interesting distinction between like and love. There's something so sad about J2 trying to insist, to me anyway, that he would also choose this even if he wasn't destined to love Porter due to being Of Jace. Love is destiny, but "like"? Like has the connotation of. Friendship. New feelings, innocence, juvenile. Just enjoying each other's company. J2 has so little, and he enjoys being around Porter. He loves Porter, but he likes him. It's... almost... adolescent. But it's also very. Forget the sweeping romance. I would do laundry and taxes with you.

“I like you, too, Bluejay.” I mean. Barely a reference but we all know Bluejay is so Hey, little Songbird coded from hadestown. I've joked about this but legit i was so so so so so terrified to give J2 a nickname to individualize him b/c i was so scared of completely blowing it. And I was just like. This is BARELY an individualization. He likes blue. Is that the dumbest thing ever. Obviously the concept of ownership is so prevalent in almost, and J2 is so comforts of a gilded cage coded. He's the precious gift, the one who learns to love the cage that Jace rejects. He's ESPECIALLY hey little songbird coded to me, b/c it's about Jace running away (Persephone) and Porter finding someone else to replace him (Eurydice).

“Hey. What’s with the silent treatment?” says Porter. “Cat gotch’er tongue?” Um. Hey. Little songbird. Cat got your tongue? Always a pity for one so pretty and young... No excuse.

I'll pair it with Porter rises from his desk, and J2 is in the embrace of his arms. and It feels so good being in Porter’s arms. and “I can make it go away,” says Porter, so softly—tenderly—even as he tightens his grasp on J2, secure. etc etc. Because that's not like. As on the nose but that's ALL Hadestown comforts of a gilded cage imagery. Someone who could love these walls that hold her close, and keep her safe, and think of them as my embrace. etc etc. Just. This idea of J2 running away from somthing and straight into the trap that was so heartbreaking to me. "Strange is the call of this strange man. I wanna fly down and feed at this hand. I want a nice soft place to land. I wanna lie down forever." etc. Even as he's getting this like. Horrible revelation about the truth of what Porter did to jace, and he's feeling this new fear that this could be him, he was built to find comfort here. He was raised to find comfort here. Porter wants everything. And J2 owns nothing, not even himself. "Seeing as you've got nothing to lose, and I could use a canary"

To go to something... maybe funnier? Maybe not. Again. Silly pull. J2 sniffs. Finally, he braves a look up, blinking back tears as he says, “Can… you just hold me a little longer?” Porter’s smile makes him forget all else. “Of course.” Like. This doesn't take place in chapter 7, but to me, this is the smoking gun that J2 and Porter were always going to sleep together (i mean, they already have, but in a Mega Turbo Detect Thoughts Sex Trick Orgasm Way). This is actually something from When Harry Met Sally! Sally says this to harry when she's crying about her ex getting married. And he holds her and gives her a kiss and this is the first time they sleep together. Like this is so Hurt/Comfort (evil version) of that scene to me, and the nature of like, comfort that turns into sexual tension is fascinating to me. And like. There's something so comedic and pathetic and cloying about the way she asks it too. Like. The desperation but also the slight comedy of it.

I'll also say, if you wanna read this into it too. I do this this is All I've Ever Known (evil version). "all i've ever known is how to hold my own, but now I wanna hold you, hold you close, I don't wanna ever have to let you go. Now I wanna hold you hold you tight, I don't wanna go back to the lonely life" etc etc

 “He still loves you, you know.” / Jace is... “ —A good guy,” he insists hard, / “I—I know we are… of the same. But—I don’t understand it. If—” / “Porter, gods, Porter, if I loved you the way my master loves you…” / "How does he love me?”  OK. So this entire scene is a little bit Handmaiden coded in that it's like. Ohhhh what if we were fucking and I was pretending to do this in service of teaching you what the person you're supposed to be with and what they would do this is just instructional i prommyyyyy.

But Also this whole Thing to me I was taking on a kind of. Like. Reverse Twelfth Night thing? Like, the concept is very much closer to Orsino and Viola's deal, in that Viola loves Orsino while Orsino loves olivia (Say that some lady, as perhaps there is, hath for your love as great a pant of heart as you have for Olivia! You cannot love her, you tell her so. Must she not then be answered?". "I am all the daughters of my father's house. And all the brothers too") But I do really like the idea of Viola having to convey the depth of Orsino's longing for Olivia by using her own pining for Orsino. That's littered throughout this scene. There are a ton of nods to the exchange. "How does he love me" is a direct quote. There's also this:

If I did love you in my master’s flame, With such a suff’ring, such a deadly life, In your denial I would find no sense. I would not understand it.

But yeah it's this idea of like. J2 is channelling jace and getting extremely horny about it. He's imainging the depth of Jace's longing and he finds it genuinely moving. He things Porter deserves that. but also. J2 is using his own longing here, and essentially giving Porter a gift because he knows the depth of that longing would mean more to Porter if it was from Jace. Which of these is the truth? Maybe both

"With adorations. With fertile tears. With groans that thunder love. With sighs of fire" This is the only thing that is like. A direct quotation of something Viola says in Twelfth Night, and I just think its so horny and honestly? Effective. Why ruin a good thing?

OK! Last one!

J2 is getting what he wants. He gets to be by Porter's side, despite the risk. (And in his memories, Jace looks so happy. Doesn't Porter deserve that, too?) So why does this feel like… death? Like he’s dissolving into snow—dissipating in the warmth of the sun? That’s how it works, right? He doesn’t know that much, but it feels true, doesn’t it? When your heart breaks, you should die.

Like.... Am i gonna get stoned for this? Do I have the right in invoke Tony Kushner? Do i deserve this? I'm being so real here, this is one of those "janelle is using paradise lost to talk abt jaceporter" things that just feels deeply WRONG.

Anyway. This is 100% and Angels in America reference. And I... It feels a little wrong to put Jaceporter fanfiction and such a beautiful piece of art in the same breath but here we are. The line is:  "I don’t understand why I’m not dead. When your heart breaks, you should die. But there’s still the rest of you." Like... I just think that line is so sad and beautiful. Am... Am I allowed to do this??? Like. It doesn't feel right. It felt right to put it there. It was so clear in my mind. It just felt so emotionally true... J2 is so green... And it's this like. Invocation that he's a person but he's a simulacra. he's animated snow. How does being a person even work. How does it work when you've been robbed of your purpose?

It's just. That's how it should work, right? When your heart breaks, you should die.

Anyway. Thank you for my long winded nonsense. Genuinely sorry this took so long.

[iamlittlelostsoul]

Love can hurt sometimes...

yey! am finally finishing all your req!!! although this sorta ended up sorta like a collab between the two of us. Thank youuuu @whatevermywpis >< for giving me this idea and helping me write this Xddd

I hope you along with everyone else enjoy it!!!<33 I'm so sorry for not updating for so long school had me on a noose xdd but i'm free now for a whilee :DD

not me recycling my malleyuu drafts that's been rotting for ages lol xdd

Pairing: Silver x gn!cursed!reader

Theme: Romance and Angst

Overview: "shush, now love....I know I know but I can't help it. I love you and I can't give it up even if it costs my life. Aw, please don't cry smile for me just one last time...please?"

______________________________________________________________

Silver has heard tons about you from their dorm leader Malleus

It all started with Malleus finding out and meeting with a person that actually lives in the cold abandoned Ramshackle dorm.

Then he goes missing and comes back with the brightest grin on his face as he talks about the things he did with his newfound friend.

It was an adorable sight how Malleus was over the moon talking about his human friend to Lilia, Sebek, and himself. And to Malleus love and excitement he decided to introduce them to his new human friend he's been talking about.

And you were exactly how he imagined from the fae prince's stories.

"Hello, I'm [Mc]! It's really nice to meet you all" they cheerily greet them with a polite bow.

Surprisingly he managed to stay awake the whole time and somewhat and someway you two became closer and you were patient enough to not get mad at him whenever he randomly falls asleep, you'd even go so far and let him sleep on your lap.

Which deepens and strengthens the bonds you two share.

You two have been meeting up often, helping in school tasks, events, or simply just dining together of course you two still include Malleus and the other two. And Malleus is pretty happy that his friend's been getting along with his two retainers and Lilia.

Lilia's been giving him weird looks not the bad kind whenever he was to be with you alone or with the others. He believes Lilia and sometimes Malleus's been scheming something as they hang out with you they'd often excuse themselves yet leave him behind with you....not that he minded it though.

You were nice and sweet and a very fun person to hang out with, you were patient and knowledgeable even when you happen to not belong from their world you seemed to fit in naturally.

Time and time again he always felt so different when he's with you. No it's definitely not the bad kind! It's more nice and comfortable probably something more than just friends.

"You like them." Lilia says with a smug grin interrupting his thoughts.

"I do" Silver says unhesitantly.

"No no romantically~" Lilia says in a rather teasing tone.

"I do?" Silver says cocking his head to the side he's not sure if this is a question to himself or to Lilia...but a part of him sorta knew he does like them. No- he loves them. He always did and now that he realizes it he can't stop the red hues spreading across his cheeks which earned a small chuckle from Lilia.

His heart beats aloud. Ever since Lilia mentioned it, ever since he realized his true feelings. His heart kept pounding so hard that he kinda fears you can hear it every time you and he hangs out.

Lilia and Malleus has been pushing him to go confess. And they've been doing everything necessary to console him that they definitely like him back too. They've even helped set up a date so he could confess his feelings to the [girl/boy] he likes.

The only issue is he couldn't somehow muster his courage to confess much to Lilia and Malleus annoyance (they're not mad just a lil stressed they're playing the long game).

Several times passed by and he finally somehow gained courage in doing so after a long sermon from Sebek on how he's stressing out Malleus-sama yada yada yada.

It was past Midnight and they met up by the garden behind Ramshackle dorm. Their usual hangout place.

"Silver hey!! How's your day been?" They gingerly asks him.

Silver smiled at the sight. He could barely see them and he can't help but be a lil mesmerized at the sight of his beloved laying flat on the grass their face leaning to the side covering half of their face as they remain staring at the fireflies dancing on a row of Dasies, the light from the fireflies and moonlight illuminating their figure and he felt as if he fell for them once again. "Oh...same as usual" he chuckles as he sat beside them.

They stayed like that for several minutes, silent although not awkward but rather comforting.

"Soo...I would like to tell you something" they both spoke in unison startling them and made them chuckle.

"You go first" They said.

"No No you first!" Silver says back.

"Ehh?? No you first!"

They sat there in silence for a moment before Silver takes a deep breath and broke the silence

"So..."

"So?"

"I...have something to confess"

"go on" they urged him.

"I like...no love you" he confesses.

"..."

"..."

"It's ok if you don't like me back...I just wanted to get this off my chest" he says as he watches their features get a lil startled.

"No no! Silver....I...love you too." they said covering their face as it gets a tint of red but something in their eyes shows a hint of sadness.

"You don't have to force yourself to like me." he mutters.

"No no!! It's complicated...I do love you...it's just that..." *they take a sharp breath. "I'm cursed..."

Silver took a moment to process their words. "You're...cursed?" he repeats as his eyes widens and his mouth went hanging open.

They nod as they sat up and face him.

"...How heavy is it? Maybe we could find a cure, I'm sure Malleus-sama and fath-err Lilia-sama is willing to help." He says his eyebrows creasing as he looked at them filled with worry. He felt a tightness in his chest as he awaits for them to answer his question...on the back of his mind he could already tell where this is going.

"I don't really recall when or where I got it...but it's definitely not here in NRC or the day I arrived here. But umm...It can't be cured.."

"It...can't?"

They nods. " It can't..."

"B-...but...don't say that! I'm sure we'll find something! There's a plenty of books and spells here i'm sure one of them will be the cure."

"It can't....that to make it simpler I'm sorta allergic to magic..." they said as they looked away placed a handkerchief on their cheek and wipes away some concealer revealing some dark heavy cracks like tattoed on their skin. He could already tell it's covering them from head to toe with how heavy it looks.

Silver stares...he couldn't muster a word...Allergic to magic?...what how?...but-....

"yeah...i'm sorry. It's none of your fault, I promise. I love hanging out with you and everybody else Malleus, Lilia, Sebek, Ace and Deuce and all of them!" They said.

Silver could tell they were trying to keep a brave face for him...and it hurts...he should have said it sooner...he should have done more with them...he should have notice something was wrong and found a cure immediately...but it's all too late. He couldn't utter a word...his face remain stiff and his heart felt as if it's being squeezed the life out of it.

'It hurts' he thought. 'They must be hurting really badly and I couldn't do a thing' he thought once more as he unclenches and clenches his fist his head hanging low and thank seven he is sitting down if not he might have stumbled and fell.

"Don't be down Silver...I really don't blame any of you..Not you, Malleus, our friends who overblotted, or anyone else. It's my choice to remain close with you guys...I love hanging out with you all and most especially I love you." They said as they cup his cheeks, their eyes gets watery and it wavers as it stares at his.

"I don't want you gone..."

"I don't wanna leave either"

"How long....how longer do you think you'll last" he managed to say his chest felt so stuffy and it's so hard to breath but he tries...he tries so hard to keep a straight face to not worry them and hurt them further.

"...not so longer than several more minutes" they hesitantly said as they leaned their head on his chest.

They stayed silent for a while with Silver hugging them in his arms, his head hanging low on their shoulder nuzzled on their neck.

"Will you kiss me?" They said their hand digging on his silvery locks.

"Yes" He answers back with no hesitation as he leans away for a bit and stares at their eyes longingly.

He presses his lips on theirs, he felt them gasp their body stiffen for a moment before relaxing. They kiss and it felt like time stopped and everything around them disappears. Silver watches them as their eyes flutter shut as their body shivers with delight as he deepens the kiss.

It felt as if it was just the two of them their fingers laced together while his other hand wrapped around their waist and theirs on the back of his head pulling him closer desperately as if their life depends on him. If only it was then maybe they would have lived longer.

The kiss lasted for about a minute...before he felt their body go cold and the hand holding onto him goes limp.

He kisses them back awaiting for their response. None.

He kisses them again and squeezes their hand pulling them closer, yet they didn't answer back.

Ah, it looks like he can't keep his poker face on anymore. Tears gently falling as he held their corpses that slowly turns into dust, no more was the person he fell in love with. No more was their laughter, their playful bantering, their voice... it so quiet now.

"It feels so simple... loving you, always..."

"It feels so painful... I hate it so much."

Love is such a lovely thing...so mysterious, so sudden...but sadly not all love ends with a happy ending...it can really really hurt sometimes....

[alucardsinep]

This is not an ask game because i don't know any BUT!

I am very kindly asking you to post your 5 favourite sk8 (or just matchablossom) official arts :3 and explain why you like them, for science.

YIPPEEEE i love science and such a kind ask must be answered of course :3 had to sit on it for a while to Think but here!

thisis not an ordered top5 list but this is the best one. i love married gay people. smug bastard. the entire fandom went insane when this dropped and with good reason. it was a good day also theyre both dressed like homosexuals and/or middle aged dads which either way i love for them

2. THE BEST renga art in my opinion. gets extra bonus points for langa being a mint choccy enjoyer and the color scheme in general being Very Good

3. miya my beloved <3 one of the best official arts of all time imo. nothing but the best for my favourite catboy :3 meow

4. SO SORRY i couldnt find better versions of the last 2. but this one is just so good and silly. mr women want me fish fear me and his trophy husband with his cunty sunglasses. i love them

5. AGAIN with the sample text but. 1) rekimiya sibling dynamic canon to me and 2) old man shadow ragequitting mintendo bitch game. this is canon to me. miya is a pro gamer and reki is proud of him :3 draw your ocs like this ⬇️

BET YOU THOUGHT THIS WAS THE END lol no here are two Honorary Mentions of fun outfits that did not make my top 5

first ones this renga. they rly said trans/nb rig(ht)s

AND THEN FINALLY WE HAVE these absolutely iconic fits. teenage mb you will always be famous. theyre getting an ova and i love that for me personally <333

[whiskeysmulti]

Anon? Don’t know her.

Let’s see… my favorite detail about some of your portrayals… I’ll try not to repeat myself too much, but I’m sure I inevitably will have to at some point.

-

Ahhhh what haven’t I said about Gokudera before at this point? I think I’ve already stated a number of times the things I like about him, but I’ll reiterate that my favorite detail about him are the things that I don’t often see in other portrayals, particularly the fact that he should be at risk of losing his hearing or at least have an issue with tinnitus if he uses his bombs a lot. Sure sure, it’s just anime/manga but a bit of realism doesn’t hurt anyone (cept for him) and it’s quite interesting to build off of, so it’s fun. So I suppose, my favorite details can be summarized into: what details did Amano not go into much less even touch that you incorporated into him. Like his inability to sleep very well or the fact that he doesn’t really eat that much in general. Lil details like that are always so fascinating for me to see and therefore I love it.

-

Hmmm for Dino, I suppose it’s the fact that you have a pretty good balance between him being silly, him being cool, and having that cocky ass smug attitude which pisses Hibari off sometimes. There is no fear to be seen or awkwardness. Just a guy calmly and expertly manipulating Hibari into listening or preventing him from doing things.

-

Favorite detail about Tsuna is that he makes it so easy for me to hate him. FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES THAT IS A JOKE!!!!! Honestly speaking, Tsuna tends to be pretty careful about the things that he says, and he doesn’t really have a knack for angering people that often. He may have blown up on some people (ie Haru or Lambo) but he always does apologize for it soon after.

The reason I bring this up (and I honestly can’t recall if I’ve mentioned it before) but it’s unrealistic? Homeboy has not had a single friend in how long up until Reborn came into his life? He hasn’t talked to any girls until Kyoko talked to him for like 5 minutes one time and that was enough for Dr.Shamal to pity him enough to treat him??? The fact that he hasn’t fucked up more often with stupid shit he said astounds me, honestly. He’s a young kid and he should be very socially inept and maybe struggle more with how to interact with others. He should be struggling more with actually making friends and maintaining them or what- but it just happened so naturally and smoothly.

I honestly like the fact that he says dumb shit sometimes that pisses Haru off. It just feels more realistic to me and I love that… even if it stresses me out sometimes LOL.

-

Well, there honestly isn’t much canon information on G so really, at this point he’s an OC of your own creation LOLOLOL Any of the primo generation are basically OCs of our own creations at this point. IF YOU WON’T GIVE US INFORMATION, WE’LL HAVE TO MAKE IT UP OURSELVES, YOU COWARD!!!!! (jk I love you Amano~) Though, with the way that I like to think of the Primo vs Decimo generations being like healing from generational trauma kind of vibes, I like the fact that you had it set that G and Daemon were actually quite close up until the betrayal happened. It’s a very nice parallel from how Gokudera just barely trusts anyone, and definitely does not trust Mukuro. Lil parallels like that are just so fun to me and therefore it’s my favorite.

-

For Enma, I could just cheat by saying that my favorite detail is that he’s just a cutie patootie and I LOVE HIM!!!!!! Jokes aside, I actually forgot that he’s quite fond of cats, so your portrayal reminded me of that, so my favorite detail is the fact that you do put some focus on his liking of cats. It is my favorite because ‘oh wow I forgot about that fact. Ohhhhhhhh’. Yes. I’m a weird but simple bean.

Anonymously send me your favorite detail about how I play my character.- no longer accepting!

.Whiskey. Omg Neo thank you so much! The fact that you picked up on those details when I was so afraid some of the headcanons wouldn't work, or that I was stressing something the manga mentioned once and it wasn't that important to the character, or whatever. So hearing this means so much.

As we've discussed before, the way I write, I try to bring the character to life. I don't want to just be one of those strictly canon compliant blogs that feels like they just memorize the character's lines and that's it. I aim to try to make the character feel more realistic which is where a lot of these headcanons come into play or picking up on those details that were only mentioned once and brushed off by Amano (Dera's poor health habits and recklessness being borderline suicidal, Enma being quiet and soft spoken but a gentle animal lover under it all, Tsuna making so many mistakes because this is the first time in his life he's had actual friends and doesn't know what to do without Reborn telling him so he should actually be completely socially inept at this point if it weren't for Nana teaching him basic manners, etc.) I put so much work into those headcanons and questioned myself and almost didn't use some of them because I feared the fandom would come for my ass for being too OOC which I've seen happen to some Headcanon Heavy and Divergent writers I followed before. So I always question myself if what I'm adding fits the character or not. I know a lot of stuff can be written off as "my blog, I'll do what I want" but you've seen the way I write, I'm more "I'll do what I want with this character within reason because I want to keep their personality in character and build from it, not break it down or change it."

So thank you so much, you don't know what it means to me that you caught those details and you actually like them.

[sordidmusings]

Dragon shifters are a weakness. Sir Croc is a weakness. This fic is a weakness.

I love sacrificial trope and you did such a great job with it!! Made it make sense why reader was the choice without delving into cartoonish cruelty from the community. Honestly, just passively not belonging is much more relatable in general anyway and I find that in most circumstances where someone is rejected it tends to run that route instead of the full bully. Neglect/ignore vs hate/abuse and it’s also something even nice people participate in so yet again much more grounded and will resonate with most readers!

I’m gonna hop in this man’s cave and try and squat there cuz it sounds so wonderful 😩 he may kill me about it but that’s a risk I’m willing to take lol

Speaking of the man!! I love the descriptions of hiiiiim! I can’t remember coming across a dragon form that stays crocodilian especially in the face and it was so fun to picture. And same with his humanoid form!! Both make me itch to draw - kudos on writing something that gets others’ creative juices flowing!

Having worked a few labor intensive gigs, reader’s attitude with it is honestly relatable 💀 it helps time pass, works your body down enough to sleep at least a little better than pure stress allows, gives a sense of accomplishment like they mentioned, and most importantly it keeps you grounded to your body instead of purely stuck in your head. Gotta run from those pesky emotions lol also organizing/decorating the spaces does sound fun it would be heaven for my neurospice brain. What do you mean we have to fear big monster man?? There’s lots of stuff I get to clean, catalogue, stage, and stare at 👌🏻

“Every time you turned around you expected to see him there, judging you” sent me it’s very him and very true and I can see that beloved face of condescension he always sends Buggy’s way lol on a serious note with it tho, I do like the atmosphere set up throughout to have it be that “predator lying in wait for the prey to be vulnerable” set up 👌🏻 very fitting for a croc and sir croc

I adore the interaction when Reader goes to start the surplus. You get Croc so well with how he’s just toying with them and his vast torrent of unquestionable superiority with the undercurrent of smugness and amusement.

And “pet”??

I would be struggling with it too reader haha it’s a fuckin favorite

Omg the book interaction with the mAN - yet again you characterize him so well. It’s easy to imagine him during these scenes and the choices you make for him fit him so naturally and I Love Him

HE GIVES US A GIFT I-

I NEED HIM. Ahhhhh the implications of a dragon giving a gift are just 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

So happy there’s more for me to read later 😩 need all the time with Dragon Croc

Thank you for writing and sharing 🤍

The Sand Dragon and I Pt. 1 (Dragon! Sir Crocodile x Reader)

Part 1 / Part 2

Warnings: this chapter is SFW but the next one won’t be so still MDNI 18+, gn afab! Reader, Dragon Shifter! Sir Crocodile, the power dynamics are whack in this one not gonna lie, canon typical violence, Crocodile calls you pet

WC: 4.6k

Summary: You’re set to be sacrificed to the fearsome Dragon of the Sands as a tribute for your town. When you get down to the caves and get face to face with him however- you make a different choice.

Notes: this fic is for me ngl this is just me fully shoving my monsterfucking dragon loving desires onto sir crocodile and I hope other people like it

You knew long before your name was called that you were going to be the tribute to the sand dragon. No living family, you worked a non-essential job, healthy enough to make the journey to his cave- you checked all the sacrificial boxes. No one else seemed surprised either, very few people made the effort to even look sad for you. It was something that you were used to since you never made the effort to connect with anyone in your town.

You were independent- a symptom of your parents dying young and you having no family to take you in. No one else made the effort to help you, so you made no effort to help them whenever situations came up. You didn’t hate anyone, and no one hated you, but there was a large gap that you accepted a long time ago.

So when it was time to select a human tribute for the terrifying sand dragon that made his home in the caverns miles from your town- a ritual that happened once every 5 years to appease him on top of the annual gold tribute- everyone knew it was you. You had your bags packed at home already- not that you needed to pack much. The journey would take a day on horseback and as you strapped your bags to the horse’s saddle you couldn’t help but feel bad for her.

A sacrifice to be eaten, just like you.

A few people saw you off, mostly to be polite. A small token of appreciation to the person who was going to die so they could live worry free for another few years. It meant nothing to you.

The journey was painfully uneventful. Miles of sand dusting over craggy rocks with no other life in sight. You had hoped for something- anything- to keep your thoughts away from your impending doom but you never got that reprieve. So you stirred, and thought, and stewed until resentment and anger came bubbling up.

Why did you have to die? Just because your life sucked already? Because there was no one to stick up for you? Years of being alone suddenly tore through you- sadness hardening over into anger.

And then something else.

You don’t know what it is yet but it drives you to continue your journey until you reach the giant cavern opening jutting out of the dunes and rocks. You leave the horse at the entrance just underneath the lip of the cavern for some shade. Giving her your remaining water you leave her untied, hoping she’ll have a better chance than you.

It’s a long and dark journey down into the caverns below the desert, a single torch lighting your way. At first it was just rocks and sand lining the path down but soon it turned to bones and dented armor. You don’t look down for too long, knowing you’ll lose your nerve if you have to look at the discarded bodies knowing your skeleton might soon reside with them.

It takes you an hour, maybe, time is hard to gauge down here, to get to the first opening. Your torch lights only a fraction of the vast cavern but you quickly find you don’t need it- golden braziers line the stone walls and flicker with fire illuminating the space.

Initially you wonder if you were somehow transported somewhere else- because a place this nice existing in a deep underground cavern was vexing. The stone floor was covered in the most luxurious rugs you’ve ever seen. Deep reds, golds, and blacks overlap and you fight the urge to run your hands over the fabric. Mismatched furniture liters the space- all expensive in their own rights but seemingly misplaced as none of them are quite set up in a logical formation. A pleasant humidity hangs in the air and you look and see a small natural fountain in one of the far corners of the cave. On the opposite side of that there’s another tunnel that seems to continue down further into the earth.

What use does a dragon have for a living room?

“Seems like a little morsel has arrived at my doorstep.” A low voice echoes off the dark stone walls and practically shakes the ground you’re standing on. It’s hard to deny the deep instinct to run away- all of the cells in your body signal to you that this is a predator and you are prey.

From the far tunnel you hear the distinct sound of claws against stone and you know he’s coming. You hold your breath as a giant crocodile-esque head slides into view. If it wasn’t for the sheer size of this creature you think you could mistake him for a crocodile- the long flat snout and smooth scales resembling a mosaic across dark green skin. But the way the scales shine like emeralds flecked with gold set him apart. As his legs come into view your eyes are drawn to his front left leg. In contrast to the dark green of the rest of his body his front left leg from the elbow down was a bright shimmering gold. It almost seemed liquid the way it connected with his body but the way it landed with a hard thud with each step solidified its hardness. A deep gash ran across his snout, dull and long healed over. Bat like wings folded against his long body as he finally made the last few strides into the cavern with you.

It’s hard not to be in awe of a creature so terrifying yet stunning- fear overloading and loosing all meaning and giving way to appreciation. Colorless eyes lock in on you and his pupils contract into slivers. You truly and deeply feel like prey under his gaze.

“Your heart is beating so fast little tribute. Will you run? Will you fight? Or are you just going to stand there and let me eat you? I do love seeing how your little human brains scramble…” His maw opens and you see large, shining teeth- each probably as big as you. You’re not sure if a dragon can smile but you get the impression from his voice that he is, there must be something deeply amusing to him to see you falter under his gaze.

You don’t know what comes over you. That emotion that had puzzled you for the last day now rips up and into your throat, saying works your brain hasn’t even processed.

“What if I can make myself useful to you.”

Defiance.

That catches him off guard, his large head tilting slightly. He’s only confused for a second before he chuckles, a deep sound that shakes your ribcage. “Well this is new. And what do you think you could possibly do for me?”

And now your brain has caught up, desperately searching for good answers. “I can cook, I can clean, I can organize- I’m sure a dragon as important as yourself has much better things to do than worry about the day to day.”

There’s a painful silence as the dragon mauls over your answer, terrifying eyes dragging over your form. You have to bite the inside of your cheek to keep yourself grounded.

“I have to admit, it is an interesting proposition.” He steps closer and lowers his head to the ground, jaws only a few feet from you. “It wouldn’t be a good life, serving under me.”

“It would be a life.”

“I guess it would.” You feel the heat of his breath wash over you. “If you ever underperform I will not hesitate to kill you.”

“I understand.”

“And you will do whatever I ask?”

“I will.”

“Then we have a deal.”

You feel like you’ve just sold your soul to the devil. In a way, you probably have. But you don’t feel bad about it at all.

His head swings up and away from you, standing up and nearly scraping the ceiling. “You’ll stay in here until I clear out a space for you. I’ll lay out where you can and cannot go and what your daily routine should be.”

You nod, knowing he probably doesn’t need to hear much more from you.

“Get some rest. I’ll start working you to the bone tomorrow.”

And with that he leaves you, thundering steps disappearing into the depths of the further tunnels. When you can no longer hear and feel the steps you collapse to the ground, exhausted from bargaining for your life. Every muscle in your body had been tensed and you work your way through your body, individually willing your body to relax.

This was your life now. You needed to get used to this fucked up situation very fast.

Gathering yourself you find the largest couch and drag it over by the fountain and begin putting together your makeshift bed. It was surprisingly comfortable and the sound of running water did a lot to block out your worst thoughts.

You shut your eyes and before you know it a sleep of sheer exhaustion catches you, dragging you down into unconsciousness.

You’re not sure how much sleep you got, there was no way to tell the time this deep underground. But you feel as rested as you probably could get under the circumstances and quickly move the couch back to where you found it before the dragon could come and see you’ve disturbed his room. Piling your stuff neatly behind a rock on along the wall of the cavern you wait for your instructions.

You pace the heavily rugged floor trying to keep an ear out for the distinctive sound of a dragon approaching. You don’t have to wait too long for some noise- but it’s not what you expect. You hear regular human foot steps echo through the far tunnel- are you not the only human here? Did someone sneak past you in the middle of the night? All your questions are stopped in their tracks when a man walks out of the tunnel.

Well, not quite a man.

He’s mostly human, standing on two legs with tanned skin and slicked back black hair. Dressed in an immaculate suit with a fur lined cloak covering his broad shoulders. But of course- there were the other features. You first notice his hands- one covered in green scales and ending in sharp claws, the other a molten gold molded into similar claws. His ears are longer and more pointed than a humans and across his face is a long dark scar. And of course you can’t miss the thick crocodile tail dragging behind him, the same deep emerald green scales of the dragon you faced yesterday.

As he walks closer you notice that he’s still so much bigger than you- towering over your form by three feet or more. His eyes had the same reptilian slit to them as he looked you up and down.

Somewhere in the back of your mind you’d think you’d be remiss not to call him handsome. But the fear for your life drowns out most of those traitorous thoughts.

“Surprised to see you didn’t try and scamper off during the night.” His voice, while certainly not as loud, still resonates deep in your chest as it echoes off the tall stone walls of the cavern.

“I made a deal, I intend to see it through.” You make the choice not to look him in the eyes out of fear of disrespecting him.

“Good to see you have some sense. Here.” He reaches into his coat and pulls out a rolled up piece of paper. You take it and unfold it and see a map. “This is your map of my lair. I’ve labeled the caverns you can go in and which ones you can’t. You step a single foot into somewhere you’re not supposed to be- I’ll kill you.”

���Understood.” You reply, looking over the map. You knew this place had to be massive but looking over the paper in your hand it was so much vaster than you imagined. Dozens of caves and tunnels interlinking, going over and under each other. It made your head swim.

“I’ll guide you to the important rooms so you don’t get lost. But after that I expect you to be able to navigate on your own.” He starts walking and you follow close behind as you try and track where you’re going on the map.

You travel down deep, following him as he quickly navigates the tunnels. Thankfully everything is lit by the same type of flaming braziers that are in the large entrance cavern.

“You don’t need to worry about preparing food for me- I only eat every few months and I eat more than you could possibly physically handle. You’re here to keep my lair neat and organized. Initial cleaning of the caverns I indicate and then if you do a good job- and only if- you can begin cataloguing my hoard.” He doesn’t make any effort to speak directly to you or to make sure you’re matching his pace.

“Yes my… lord?” It comes off more of a question as you quickly realize you have no idea what to refer to him as.

He stops in his tracks so abruptly you almost collide with his tail, but thankfully you’re able to stop just short. “This is the dry food storage, silly human foods that they leave as tribute. Should be enough for you to live on.”

You peek in, expecting a sparse and dingy space but are pleasantly surprised when you see all manner of foods. Beans, grains, dried fruits, spices, and probably more in the dark wooden cabinets and shelves. You only have that brief moment before he is walking off again and you hastily follow.

“Sir Crocodile. That’s the best name you humans have given me, so you can refer to me as such. My true name is unpronounceable for human forms.”

You nod, not like he can see you but better safe than sorry. Only a few tunnels later he stops again and points to the smallest cavern yet. It’s not actually small by most definitions of the word but as you gaze in you might actually call it cozy.

There’s a mismatch of elegant furniture piled in there- a dresser, a cabinet, a large bed, and rugs covering the stone floor. The bed is unmade but linens sit on top of it and even from this distance you know they are higher quality than you have ever even seen.

“This is where you’ll be sleeping and existing when not performing your duties. I don’t want you out wandering when I haven’t assigned you something.” And then he’s back to walking. You were expecting to just be thrown in a bare room but seemingly he put forth some effort… you’re not sure what to think about that.

The next stretch of your journey is long and you purposefully make sure your eyes don’t wander into any caverns you’re not stopping at. You focus on tracing your path, finger dragging along the rough paper of the map as you go.

“This is the last cave you’ll be allowed in until you prove yourself trustworthy.” He stops and finally fully turns around to face you. “This is my surplus- the stuff left to me that I deemed not worthy of my hoard. It’s been sitting and collecting dust for too long. I need to know what exactly is here and if I should keep it in storage or dispose of it. After you’re done cleaning the previous spaces and the tunnels between you can get to work on organizing and cataloging everything in here.”

To call this place a mess would be kind. Layers of junk and books haphazardly thrown into a cave that you honestly can’t tell the size of. There’s only room to get maybe five feet through the entrance before the wall of stuff is piled nearly as high as the ceiling. And on top of everything is a thick layer of dust and dirt. This might take your lifetime to sort through.

You turn your glance back to Sir Crocodile and realize he’s been carefully watching you this whole time, sharp gaze dragging over your body. Suddenly it’s ten degrees hotter in the tunnel and you force your eyes back to the ground. Did he purposefully make his human form attractive or was that just the default? And why did you even find the creature that could kill you without a second thought attractive. Stupid stupid base instincts.

“I suggest you clean the tunnels first so you learn your way. Then the entrance, food storage, and lastly here. You clean your room on your own time. I expect you to work at least eight hours a day- keep track with this.” That golden clawed hand extends out and you see a pocket watch settled in his palm. You reach out and take it, fingertips gliding over the cold metal of his hand.

“Thank you sir.” Pressing the small button on the top you find out what time it is- just before noon.

“Do your best not to make too much noise. If there is something so completely wrong you cannot deal with yourself just yell. I will hear. Just like I will hear if you try to leave, understood?”

“Yes.” Silence hangs awkwardly in the air and you look upward for a second to see him glaring down at you.

“Yes sir.” You correct, and his face returns to neutral.

“Alright, don’t make yourself too comfortable. I’ll check back soon.” And with that he turns and walks away, down a tunnel that you don’t have permission to tread into.

You let out a long breath, taking in all of the information he’s just given you. Using your map you (slowly) make your way back up through the tunnels to where you started. As you passed by the few spaces you were allowed in you couldn’t help but think about how much better this whole situation was than you expected.

Sure, scrubbing rock for weeks wouldn’t be fun but you expected much worse like cleaning his scales or butchering meals. You even had a space of your own that rivaled your room back home. Of course there’s no sunlight and you have the hanging threat of being eaten alive but you can’t help but feel a weird sense of relief. It’s not like you have anyone that you miss or responsibilities that you’ve left behind. This was just the newest (and incredibly bizarre) chapter in your life.

Well.

Time to get cleaning.

It takes you two weeks to clean the entrance, food storage, and the tunnels connecting them all. You worked more than your mandatory hours- what else were you going to do anyways, stare at stone walls? The work wasn’t fun by any means, dragging water to and from the fountain in the entrance cave was a serious workout, but there was something fulfilling once you were completely done with a space.

The entrance was the easiest given the water source was right there. You had taken one of the worse looking rugs and ripped it up to use as you cloths figuring you shouldn’t pester Sir Crocodile for cleaning supplies when you could figure out something on your own. Once everything had been as cleared of sand and dust as it could get you got to organize out the room- something actually a little fun.

You matched together furniture and set it up perfectly for gatherings. Not like there was actually ever going to be a gathering but at least your arrangement will never be messed up. You made sure to leave ample room for a dragon sized being to make it from the far tunnel to the exit- he probably leaves at some point.

The food storage wasn’t that bad either. You worked your way through it in between cleaning the entry cave and the tunnels, mostly when it was time to eat. There was a huge variety of food, most expensive and long lasting. It made sense, given that it was meant for Sir Crocodile and that no one would offer him anything less than their best for fear of being eaten. You were eating better than you had been in a while.

Throwing yourself into the work you could nearly forget why you were here in the first place. You hadn’t seen Sir Crocodile since he gave you that initial tour- you hadn’t even heard or felt movement deeper in the tunnels. Despite having no signs of him you could still feel his presence somehow. Every time you turned around you expected to see him standing there, judging you. But he never was. Maybe it was a sign you were doing a good enough job but you had no confidence in that.

No matter if your job was up to the correct standards or not you were onto your final task- cleaning and organizing the overstock. Far away the most daunting task. You have your bucket and cloths but honestly you have no idea where to start.

“From the top.” That deep voice comes from right behind you and the yelp that leaves you as you jump is mortifying.

You whip around and see Sir Crocodile in his humanoid form, clearly pleased with the reaction he got from you. He’s got a nasty grin, showing that his teeth are just as sharp as they are in his draconic form.

“I’m sorry sir?” You do your best to return your heart rate to its normal rhythm as you straighten yourself out.

“You were trying to figure out how to start here. From the top. Taking anything from the base even if it seems loose might cause the whole pile to collapse and crush you to death.” There’s a few terrifying seconds where you think he can read your mind but you shove that away- it was probably incredibly obvious how lost you were.

“Thank you sir.” It was probably simple advice but getting a clear starting point was relieving.

“Of course, I couldn’t have my new pet getting killed after they’ve done some decent work.”

Your brain struggles to process that statement, a weird mix of emotions swirling in your stomach at his words. You shove it all down for now- you can parse through that later.

“I’m glad my work is up to your standards sir. Was there something you needed?” Your hands grip your water bucket tight as his gaze bores into you.

“I’m just making sure that you are still aware of my presence. For a human though, you do seem pretty competent. You haven’t even tried to run away once.” He steps closer to you, invading your space. “Why is that?”

“I-“ You suck in a breath as you try and fight the urge to cower. “I have nothing to go back to.”

His pupils are narrow slits as they rake over your face for a few painfully silent moments. He then straightens up, barely exiting your personal space. “Interesting.”

He turns and slowly walks away, a clawed hand waving in the air. “I’ll leave you to it then.”

You finally exhale when he leaves the space, able to relax just a bit. Shoving down all your thoughts for now you focus on cleaning in a way that doesn’t destabilize the pile and crush you. It works for a while as a distraction but you slowly lose your focus and need to stop for the day.

It wasn’t until you were tucked in bed that you allowed your emotions to surface.

“I couldn’t have my new pet getting killed after they’ve done some decent work.”

It should disgust you to be called a pet. It should be dehumanizing and humiliating to have someone else look at you and see you as something so small, something they own. You search and hope that’s what’s churning deep in your stomach.

It’s not.

A shameful realization washes over you as the words repeat in your head, that low, terrifying voice somehow praising you while putting you down. You weren’t disgusted.

Heat pools in the pit of your body, a sick reaction you couldn’t will away.

You loved when he called you his pet.

You were fucked.

For the next few weeks your work slowed considerably. Not because you were less motivated- but because the overstock room had so many wonderful things. Sure there was a fair share of junk- broken porcelain dishes, rotting wooden statues, things that are so beaten you can’t even hope to identify. But the things that aren’t junk are fascinating.

You find trinkets and toys that spin and dance in ways you can’t figure out. Jewelry that despite being dusty, rusted, or dented was still gorgeous. Hand woven blankets and rugs that you could see the time and energy put in despite the holes and fraying edges. And then there were the books.

Most were non-fiction and on topics you could have only ever hoped to have learned about. From science to history to mathematics and everything in between every single page was fascinating. Every day you collected all the new books you would find and saved them for yourself later.

You’ve made yourself a reading corner in that cavern- cast off rugs and blankets folded and placed over the stone so you can sit somewhat comfortably. You fall back to only working your exact hours so you can spend the rest of your time reading. Pages old and new fill your head and you can only wonder that if these were the books dismissed by the sand dragon- what books lay in his true hoard?

“And what are you doing?” How someone so large continues to sneak up on you you’ll never understand.

You jump up, fear gripping your chest as he catches you decidedly not working. His face is decidedly unamused and you think that maybe you’ve really fucked up.

“I-“ For a second you debate lying, debate saying that you were thumbing through the pages to properly organize the book. But you aren’t the best liar- certainly not in the face of someone so terrifying. “I’m spending my off time reading through some of your books sir. I figured asking if I could read through some of your spare books was a question I shouldn’t have bothered you with.”

“Smart move pet.” Your body relaxes slightly, having made the right move. “What are you reading?”

That question catches you off guard, not expecting him to care. “Oh, this is a book on astronomy.”

“And is that interesting to you?” You can’t tell if it’s just his natural tone that makes it sound almost like an accusation or if he’s judging you.

“It’s something I never had the chance to learn about before so I decided to take the opportunity to educate myself.”

Crocodile nods, seemingly pleased with your answer. “A good use of your spare time. Just don’t get carried away.”

“Yes, of course sir.”

And like that he’s gone again. The conversation lingers in your mind until the next day when you come back to the cavern to see a plush chair situated where your rugs had been set up.

You can’t stop yourself from flushing as you look over your gift. You try not to let your thoughts and emotions get away from you, there was probably a banal reason he put a chair in here for you. I mean, sitting on the floor was probably bad for your back and if it was bad for your back then your work could be impacted.

It’s that and not that he might care about you.

No matter what, reading is a lot nicer when you’re not sitting on a stone floor.

[riddle-me-ri]

Ok, here's another one. Zero Year, Arkham, BTAS Riddler

He is having a conversation with Reader, who he isn't on friendly terms with, and third Rogue. Rogue wanting to point something out says.

"It doesn't work! It's like asking Y/N if she would sleep with you"

"Eh." Y/N said.

"Excuse me?"

"Just because I hate his guts doesn't mean he doesn't have a pretty face."

A/N: hahaha this is brilliant! I hope you don't mind I took some liberties in the wording of the conversations but I hopw the idea still reads rip. This was such a fun exercise to write other Rogues! Thanks for requesting! Also N/N is nickname since Harley loves to give people nicknames ❤🖤 Also this is untitled cause I wasn't sure what to title these scenarios lol

Trigger Warnings: Suggestive themes and strong language

Zero Year/Capullo Riddler:

“You really don’t perceive me as a threat? The man that brought Gotham City to its knees?” Ed argued.

“Well, Gotham doesn’t really have the best legs to stand on…” Joker quips back. 

You roll your eyes, it’s never-ending feud between these two.

You just had to be stuck in an Arkham padded cell. Between the both of them. You weren’t even insane, they were just overpopulated at Blackgate, but if they didn’t get you out you were going to become insane eventually.

“Y/N, tell that absolute clown-”

“Hey don’t forget handsome!” 

Edward growls in frustration. “Tell him how I’m Batman’s superior foe. How I threw Batman into hiding! How I ran this city for months!”

Joker laughs. “You’ve gotta better chance convincing her to fuck you Eddie boy.” 

“Eh..well..”

“Huh?” Both men rushed towards the wall that separated them from you.

“Please tell me you’re joking…” You hear Joker mutter. 

“I mean…Don’t get me wrong he’s a smug pompous asshole…

Unknowingly, Edward and Joker both shrug and nod. The one thing they could agree on. Well that and Batman. 

“...but he is a cute pompous asshole. Not to mention his face is totally sit-able.”

For one rare moment the Joker was actually speechless for a minute. He laments, “please tell me your joking…”

“I’m afraid she’s dead serious, my friend. As she should be. Once I no doubt escape before the clown…I’d like to take you up on that offer…”

Arkhamverse Riddler: 

“Edward, it’s not going to work.”

“Oh please, what do you know, Crane? Only someone of my parallel intellectual prowess can see the immaculate results it will produce."

Crane blinks and rubs his temples. "Edward, how is building a race course full of obstacles going to prove you're more intelligent than Batman?"

"It calls for quick thinking! He can't possibly predict every twist and turn. The moment he thinks he's solved a puzzle, another one comes right up before a moment's notice! Only a cunning genius of my caliber can pull this off." 

"I'm afraid it'll be like you trying to court Y/N to bed. It's just not going to work.."

"Ah..well…" you interject.

The two men look away from Ed's blueprints on the table to steal a glance at you. You were steadily scrolling through your phone, not lifting your head once.

"W-What was that?" Johnathan inquiries not sure if he heard right. 

You look up to the master of fear and shrug your shoulders. "I mean yeah he's a greasy egomaniac, but he is handsome in a dirty rugged kinda way." 

Johnathan blinks as if still trying to compute this new development. He looks over to Edward who has gone uncharacteristically quiet. 

Edward's face was a deep shade of red and his eyes were as wide as saucers. Riddler.exe has stopped working, good luck trying to reboot. 

BTAS Riddler: 

"Harley, hitting the toy with a mallet won't help you solve it…"

"Sure it can! It fixed all my other problems!" Harley wounds back with her signature mallet. Before she can strike the puzzle toy, Edward snatches it out of the mallet's path.

"Harley..that's cheating…"

"C'mon, Eddie! I've already tried everything! It's like Y/N sleeping with you! It's impossible!"

"Well not…impossible…" You mutter.

"Did I hear that right, N/N? You'd sleep with Ed?!"

"I mean yeah he's an obnoxious know-it-all, but he's so adorable!"  

Harley fake hurls at your admission. 

Meanwhile Ed is walking away, lowering his hat to try and hide his reddening face from the both of you.

[emiewritesthings]

spiderman ☆ jay halstead

summary: in which y/n has a fear of spiders and jay is always her first call 

warnings: language, violence against spiders (rip lol)

“Pick up, pick up, pick up.” Y/n chanted to herself as the phone against her ear rang in search of a connection to the other line. Admittedly, her hands were shaking and each breath felt like a million tiny daggers poking in her lungs, as her eyes stared at the closed bathroom door.

“Y/n?” Jay’s voice finally shot through the ringing in her ears, and a relief filled sigh left her lips. Her want to jump for joy was ignored as she remembered that she was not on the floor right now, and in grave danger of injuring herself if she lost her balance. “What happened to ‘I’m never talking to you again, Jay Halstead’?” The man’s smirk was audible to the woman that couldn’t see his smug face, and as much as she wanted to check him for it, she also wanted his help and therefore needed to appease him with some kindness.

The words he’d reference had been spoken a couple days prior when the younger woman had a few too many and upon walking her home, Jay had refused her the opportunity to get a kebab. Although Y/n’s memory was a little pathy due to being the tester of Molly’s new cocktail menu, she did remember violently crying and declaring her hatred for the man that was keeping her drunk self away from her one true love.

“Ah, well, that was before satan decided to crawl into my fucking house.” She screeched as she thought about the beast she had encountered just moments before she’d ran into the bathroom following the release of a hearty scream. She had half expected her neighbours to come check if she was okay, or even ring the police considering the noise that echoed around her small apartment. But any such action was yet to be taken, as far as Y/n was aware.

“Satan, huh?” Jay looked over at Hailey who was driving silently, only being able to hear Jay’s side of the conversation, much to her dismay. The blonde didn’t fully understand the male detective’s knowing look, not having half the relationship Jay shared with the firefighter, but knew that the ‘satan’ in question wasn’t the red horned pitchfork sporting kind.

“Don’t fuck with me right now, Halstead. I am still recovering from witnessing it scuttle under my sofa.” She breathed out a rugged breath, wiping the back of her hand against her forehead where beads of fear spawned on her skin. Jay had to hold back his laughter, knowing that the woman on the other end of the line would undoubtedly get annoyed and hang up.

“So this Satan in question,” Jay swallowed his smile as he turned on the speaker, allowing Hailey a front row seat to the ever humorous Y/n y/l/n show. “Is it spider?” Snapping her head off the road for a second, Hailey mouthed ‘seriously?’ silently, cracking up so bad that Jay had to mute the call for a moment to stop her struggles to contain said amusement from floating down into Y/n’s ears.

“A spider the size of godzilla!” Y/n bit back, already not liking that Jay wasn’t taking her very real problem unseriously. Just at the mention of the culprit had her underarms sweating and a shiver slicing its way down her spine. The flashback made her try to take a step back, which in her current circumstance had her letting a string of curse words flow off her tongue as she grabbed onto the wall, preventing her fall. Hearing the commotion, Jay unmuted the call.

“Where are you right now?” Jay asked, knowing that from the way her voice sounded she certainly wasn’t lulling on her couch or even lounging on her bed. No, she sounded… echoey?

“Hiding in the bathroom, where else would I be?” She shrugged off the question in a whisper, as if the sound of the voice may lure the creature towards her safe haven and attack her. Which to a rational person was ridiculous, but to Y/n a growing fear. “I’m standing on the edge of the bath, just in case it gets under the door, you know?” Jay didn’t know, but imagining the beautiful young woman balancing up high scouring any slight movement lightened his mood considerably.

“How are you trusted to fight fires if you are scared of a mesley spider?” Jay snorted, knowing the horror stories of the disasters Y/n had quite literally ran into as part of her profession, and yet the thought of being face to face with a harmless eight legged insect kicked in her flight instinct?

“I do not need your sass right now, Jay. I need you to bring your gun.” She insisted with a stern tone, which soon softened upon requesting his services. “You think you could come get it for me?” She pleaded and Jay instantly could imagine her eyes large and doe like, a look that resembled the call of a siren, only at least the latter led a sailor to death, the former on the other hand just tortured him every living moment. Letting out a sigh in thought - though both of them knew ther

“If I show up and it’s just a bit of fluff again-.” Jay started, reminding them both of the time that the woman had called for help in the early hours of the morning, for the man to drive thirty minutes to find it was indeed just a black piece of fluff from her sock. Y/n cringed at the memory and the embarrassment she had felt towards the man that - at the time - she hadn’t known that long.

“You won’t, I promise.” The man knew she was crossing her heart - even if he couldn’t see it. Looking towards Hailey who just nodded, confirming she was fine making a diversion, Jay agreed reluctantly.

“I won’t be there for another twenty minutes.” Y/n let out a squeal of joy at her knight in shining armour, her arms wanting to wrap around his body and squeeze him had he been there and not somewhere else in the city. The sounds were infectious, both detectives sat in the moving black truck unable to stop their lips tipping at the sweet sounds,

“You are the best, thank you, thank you, thank you!” Saying their goodbyes and once again ensuring that he wouldn’t be long, Jay hung up the phone and relaxed into his seat. However, he was forced to take a break when he felt Hailey glancing between him and the road. Frowning, he met her gaze and instantly groaned at the look that rested there.

“Don’t you dare.” Hailey shook her head with a wide grin, as Jay turned to look out the window - internally grateful for the spider in Y/n’s apartment that had given him the perfect excuse to see her.

–

“Y/n?” Jay called from the doorway once the key - which Y/n had gifted to him once when he was plant sitting and never asked for back - had unlocked her front door. Jay’s eyes widened at the mess her living room was in, the coffee table flipped and the sofa on its side, signally Y/n’s messy escape.

Shaking his head in amusement, he stepped over a stray pillow, and headed straight towards the closed bathroom door. Approaching, he could hear her humming to herself, clearly having become seriously bored and in desperate need of some form of entertainment.

Bringing his fist up to the white chipping paint that coated the wood, he let his knuckles rasp against it a couple times, observing as the noise stopped and an ominous silence followed.

“Who is it?”

“It’s the spider coming to kill you, thought I’d knock to be polite,” Y/n rolled her eyes immediately, instantly moving to unlock the door and pull it open just a crack for her left eye to peer through.

“Real funny.” She scoffed, though internally she was glowing at her rescuer finally arriving to get her out of the miniature bathroom that definitely was running out of oxygen. Moving closer and leaning down so he was closer to the eye staring at him, Jay just grinned.

“Almost as funny as you locking the door to keep a spider out.” Staring at one another - well sort of - for a moment, Y/n wanted to argue her reasoning and maybe if she had one she would have, but alas she let it go. Grumbling to herself, she dropped the matter and moved on to the more pressing one.

“Did you get it yet? Did you kill it?” She begged, voice wavering to a point that Jay began feeling sorry for her. Sure, the whole Y/n and her eight legged kryptonite had been a running joke for many years - and a very funny one at that - he had become increasingly aware that for her there was no humour in the matter. It was a fear, a phobia, something that made her blood run cold and skin sweat. The feeling of being in danger was one like no other, and Jay would never ever wish that upon anyone especially not a woman like Y/n Y/l/n.

“Not yet,” Her sigh was deep, going to say something but Jay continued. “Thought it would be good for you to help me get rid of it. Exposure therapy or whatever.” The suggestion - to Y/n - was absurd. Instantly she had disappeared from the small space between the doorframe and the door itself as she backed up into the bathroom repeating ‘no, no, no, no’ over and over. Jay recognised the panic in her voice and began to think suggesting the idea was a mistake.

“I can’t, I just-” Y/n shivered. “I can’t.”

“You can,” Jay assured shortly, wanting to compel through his words that he had all the faith in the world in her. Sure, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t like that she always turned to him when one of the bastards was causing havoc around her place. He liked that she saw him as the saviour, as the one person that she could turn to and trust even on a matter such as spider catching. It made his insides glow, a sensation he’d become addicted to, but equally seeing her not almost fall deep into a pit of anxiety at the mere mention of a spider served him much better. “And you will.”

There was silence that followed. Jay didn’t think he could take any more of the guessing, as he pushed the door open further so - for the first time since his arrival - he got a good look at the woman. She was conflicted, that was the first thing he noted. Y/n Y/l/n was all around a confident woman, someone that carried themselves with an aura that made others see them as untouchable. But like anyone else she was still very much human, a being with feelings that for Jay were open to read any time of the day.

Not saying a word, the two exited the bathroom and suddenly the hunt had begun. Y/n grabbed a pillow that Jay had earlier hopped over, and held it protectively in the air, as she glued herself to Jay’s side. Her eyes darted back and forth, back and forth in search of the critter that had to be somewhere in this hell hole.

“Here, spidey spidey.” Jay called with a wide grin, a result of the contact of Y/n’s hand wrapped around his bicep and the humour of the tense environment that had formed. Sending him a quick glare, Y/n’s grip didn’t budge as the two finally approached the last place she had seen their target. Walking around the tipped couch, Jay kicked around a couple pillows and the splayed out throw, but still there was nothing. “Maybe it’s gone.” Jay’s optimism was a rare sight, but it was soon forgotten as Y/n let out a deathly scream.

“Holy fuck!” Releasing Jay, the pillow in her hand smacked down on the floor again and again and again, all whilst a scream of fear vibrated through her mouth. “Not today satan.” Lifting the pillow she clearly wasn’t satisfied by the dead still black dot that was smudged against the pink case of the pillow that she abandoned on the floor the moment she spotted. For soon her foot cast down against it one, two, three times.

With her hair having fallen out of the loose band that had tied it back and into her line of view from the violent act she just commited, the sigh of relief that she released blew the strands around. It took a few more seconds to realise what she had done, before she was suddenly turning towards the frozen in shock man.

Without warning, Y/n jumped into Jay’s arms, a squeal of excitement emitting from her chest as her arms squeezed around him tightly. The man was so confused as to what he had just witnessed that his hands barely moved to support her.

“I did it. Holy fuck, I did it!” Y/n wasn’t sure what made her do it. Maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was the possible carbon dioxide poisoning from being trapped in the bathroom or maybe just the surfacing of years of repressed emotion, but her head was soon leaning forward and pressing a kiss firmly against the lips of Jay Halstead.

If he had been distracted before, he certainly wasn’t now. Jay’s attention was vacuumed up by the feeling of the soft lips that currently caressed his own. Her hand was behind his hair, gently strumming the hairs on the back of his neck with her fingers softly, gently, enticingly. Just as he felt he finally became conscious in his body again, Y/n had dislodged herself from the kiss and was staring at Jay in awe of her own actions.

“Oh- shit.” Awe soon turned to panic, as her mind caught up with her body and she thought over what she had just done. Her eyes blew up with uncertainty, desperately searching Jay’s that seemed to be untelling for once in their friendship. “Shit, Jay I’m so-.” But she didn’t get a time to apologise, before Jay was bringing her back and reuniting their lips and their feelings once more. The second time around the kiss was harder, more passionate as if both of them needed to prove to the other that the first was no mistake.

Pulling back, their foreheads were softly pressed upon the other’s, identical smiles on both their faces.

“Thank god.” Both of their smiles flipped, as the new voice was thrown into the touching moment breaking the thick adoring tension that surrounded them in their own little bubble. Not letting go of the woman that was pressed against his body, Jay turned both of them to look to the now open front door where the male detective’s blond partner now stood. “Could you two not have done this 30 spiders ago?” Shaking her head in amusement, Hailey let herself in and looked around with horror. “The spider really was godzilla, huh?”

[liquidlucc]

You Learned to Swim in France

AKA A fluff piece based on talking to strangers about the love of your life lol 

Read on AO3 Here! 

Moving in with Harry had been so natural Draco had hardly even realised he’d done it. Had hardly noticed when all of his clothes ended up at Harry’s; day by day, the good robes hung up next to Harry’s Auror robes in his wardrobe.  His shampoo and conditioner had to come to Harry’s.  He always showered there anyway and he wasn’t using the man’s 3-in-1, absolutely not, he’d rather actually die. And so what if he spent more nights at Grimmauld than he did at his tiny London flat? Well. By the time his lease renewal had been up, he’d… Well, he couldn’t exactly say he didn’t realise that he spent almost no time there, and after a quick conversation with Harry, which had mostly consisted of Draco babbling and the stupid, smug look never leaving Harry’s face as he’d insisted, ‘Of course you’re moving in, you daft git. Who else is gonna drag me out of bed to make him breakfast?’ 

Living with Harry full time was different than coming over, obviously. But… Draco hadn’t realised how different it would truly be until he was there. Some mornings were much of the same, good morning blowjobs and tea, laying in bed till noon. But then there were the days that they would go to the shops that Harry frequented, and that was where Draco was most out of his element. It was great, going to all these places, meeting the people who knew Harry as a regular, making comments about how this is the man they’d heard so much about, and it was confusing. 

What was even more confusing was that the muggle chip shop owner on the corner knew he’d spent his summers in France, and had even greeted him in french one morning. 

Or how the woman who owned the bookshop knew that Draco had an affinity for old romance novels, something he’d only ever told Harry. 

Or, even worse, how the workers at the clothing boutique near Harry’s work had heard of him! And known he had an affinity for green, had helped him pick out a lovely scarf and- 

“Why does everyone around you seem to know about me?” Draco had been dying to ask, and even the question didn’t seem like quite enough. He wanted to know how they knew so much, why they knew such small details, like his favourite colour, the type of tea he liked, where he learned to swim. Still, as he always did, Harry seemed to understand. And, even more, he looked a bit… sheepish about it. 

“Well. Uh.” He started, clearing his throat as he set a glass of wine aside, their dinner mostly gone. This was the time of night that they usually spent watching those weird muggle shows on telly, or listening to the radio.  Just enjoying each other and  the closeness and ease that living together allowed.  But Draco couldn’t help himself. It had been eating at him for weeks. 

“I talk about you, sometimes. Maybe a bit more often than I realised.” Harry finally explained, and Draco felt himself flush, grabbing his fork and stabbing at a piece of veg on his plate simply for something to do with his hands. “It’s not meant to be oversharing or anything. I just get a bit excited is all. People will be talking about the news, about what tea they need at the shops, something like that, and I just… I think of you. And I have to mention how my boyfriend learned how to swim in Paris. Or how you only like Earl Grey if it’s been prepared perfectly, and the second it goes cool you won’t touch it. Or how you take your showers so hot I’m surprised your skin hasn’t burned from it.” He looked genuine, if embarrassed, and Draco couldn’t help the way his heart melted, just a little. 

Because Harry remembered all those little things, things said casually, offhand, on dates or during pillow talk, moments when Draco had let Harry in, if only a little, to who he’d been before, to life between the moments of fearing for their lives as teens. And Harry had grasped at that, taken it in and catalogued it in his mind, and the next time someone brought up that they liked their eggs a certain way, well, it was only instinct that led Harry to tell everyone who would listen that Draco absolutely hated eggs, unless Harry made them. 

“I try not to do it when we’re in wizarding spaces, I know how they can be, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything, it’s just… instinct.” He repeated, shrugging, as Draco stood, making his way around the table. 

“You’re a sap, and a git. And an utter fool, for thinking of nothing else to talk about but me.” Draco laughed as he made his way over, running a hand through Harry’s curls and looking at him as though he were the only thing in the world. The traffic outside their window disappeared, the sound of the neighbour dog howling like mad, the clinking of cups being cleaned by a charmed sponge, it all seemed to fade away as he looked into those green eyes. For a moment, he thought he must understand, to some extent, why Harry went on about him so much. 

He’d gone on just as much about Harry. The broom shop he went to knew that Harry could handle whatever he had on hand, even if it was just a charmed kitchen broom. The grocer knew that Harry was lactose intolerant, but still ate enough cheese toasties to feed an army. And so really, was it any surprise that Draco was so, so obsessed with this man, he’d scream it from the rooftops, tell everyone and anyone who would listen just how lucky he’d gotten, to have him, to know about his life and who he was. 

He kissed Harry then, slow and sweet, and for once, Draco, who normally felt so cool and collected, felt so full of love he might just burst. 

And he had a feeling that no matter how long it had been, they’d still go on talking about each other to strangers, to friends, to anyone who would listen.