#dick: bruce we live in the 2000s you dont have to sign your name every time

[batarangsoundsdumb]

john texting bruce: we still on for dinner later? ;) bruce: Delete my number. john: so i'll see you at 7? bruce: Delete my number or I will arrest you for whatever drugs you have in your pocket right now. john: okay i'll meet you at ur house then

[oojamaflip-whatchamacallit]

#bruce fully dressed waiting by the front door at 7: 😔🤡#they're frenemies as my buddy randomexistentialemo pointed out#y'all should know i am at my peak of comedy in the private message section of tumblr#if one (1) dc writer messaged me right now they would have all of their material in 2 seconds#still pushing my john constantine/bruce wayne agenda fuck all of you#i know john better than anyone does#i am connected with him on a cellular level#tho i would never be english that's like disgusting full offense#(disclaimer: this is only meant to be rude to every single english person except for the ones i like not including john constantine)#honestly wouldn't it be so fucking funny if bruce signed off his messages like holt does on b99#bruce: Dinner. Acquired. Sincerely Bruce Wayne#dick: bruce we live in the 2000s you dont have to sign your name every time#bruce: You're not the boss of me. Sincerely Bruce Wayne#dick: i swear to god i will steal your phone and dump it in the mississippi river#bruce: Fuck you. That's cap. Sincerely Bruce Wayne#bruce wayne#john constantine#bruce wayne john constantine ship name is magicman#or alternatively: 'i fucking hate you' 'i love you too'#batman#dc#dcu#dc comics#dc incorrect quotes

john texting bruce: we still on for dinner later? ;) bruce: Delete my number. john: so i'll see you at 7? bruce: Delete my number or I will arrest you for whatever drugs you have in your pocket right now. john: okay i'll meet you at ur house then