#despite the fact they actually Fucked at one point but that's uh a different story let's not

[ninthprime]

snowpiercer 4x07 - 4x10 thoughts

despite being mixed on this last season, i think i could make a really good 3 hour youtube video essay about this show. or a real good a more civilized age style podcast about this show. tl;dr: i dislike this season less than a lot of people, but man, it was kind of weird, wasn’t it!

the other night while trying to gather my thoughts i reread much of the wikipedia page for this show, just to remind myself of stuff from previous seasons i may have forgotten. while doing so it occurred to me that, if summarized quickly, this season sounds far from bad. in fact, it sounds much more coherent than season 3, which has to rely a lot on layton’s weird visions. this season in concept sounds pretty appropriate as a final season- it answers questions about CW-7 and the warming of the world, gives us a big final villain with lore importance, and ends with everyone together building a new society. i’m pretty sure i guessed the final scene of this show would be an audrey and oz duet before the season even aired. which means all the flaws are in execution, which is an interesting issue to have.

as someone who’s mostly into this show because i’m attached to the characters, a lot of this is in character arcs, which feel very weird for a final season. this is where the big “they weren’t 100% sure this would be the last one” sign is blaring very brightly and loudly. that’s most clear with wilford’s death, which seems like it was made so that he could come back if they needed him to, probably as a fucked up cold zombie- but since the show’s over, it feels like it gets weirdly little emphasis. i actually think the concept of wilford offing himself before any of the people he abused can get to him could work in an “ain’t that a kick in the teeth” sort of way, but it doesn’t feel like it’s his last scene (even if the scene is pretty cool). but now it has to be! and i’m not even a wilford fan (i know, throw your rocks at me).

this extends to a lot of the other characters too. i am not a layton hater, but it is really striking to me that i can’t figure out what layton’s arc is supposed to be this season. and i don’t mean in the standard “he needs to rescue his kid” way- i mean that i don’t feel like he changes much, despite being one of the main characters and going through a huge loss when the season starts. i really enjoyed wilford pointing out how selfish he’s being in 4x06, but it doesn’t lead to anything in a way that’s bizarre. i can name a few characters where i think i know what their arc is this season- i think part of the reason i enjoyed the javi-sykes-oz stuff is that i can see the bones of all of their arcs, with oz’s being the most obvious and fulfilled. same goes for alex and josie. but none of them really feel 100% resolved, or it feels like you have to infer a lot. with josie, for example, you can tell her arc is about her trauma being revived and finally finding a way to truly come to peace with it, but it fell flat for me to have her final confrontation with headwood resolve offscreen. alex is the same way- having her lose both ben and wilford at the same time she meets nima makes her think about her identity, and the resolution is “she’s herself, and she’s going to prioritize the future and her community in the end.” but the show puts weirdly little emphasis on her saving the world, and i felt it kind of odd that it came down to just one screw. i had been guessing that she’d been planting little traps nima’s plans for the previous couple of episodes, which felt like a very alex thing to do, but i guess she wasn’t?

uh, to make a long story short- good season in concept, lacking in practice. it kind of strikes me as a first draft. in the universe where this was made under better circumstances (ie. 100% knowing this is the last one), maybe with some different voices, and we got the second draft? i think this would’ve been pretty solid. i did still like a lot of it, but this is where it’s lacking to me.

with all of that out of the way, here’s some more positive stuff and more stray thoughts:

i think 4x08 is my favorite of this last stretch of episodes, because it’s a lot of the small character moments that i really enjoy from this show. some of my favorite parts of this season and season 3, otherwise both pretty flawed seasons, involved taking advantage of the increasingly long histories the characters have. i loved roche’s ridiculous little speech to perk everyone up! look, i know he’s making stuff up, but i’m having fun! everyone’s getting a kick out of it! he gets to make a joke about yetis!

other smaller moments i liked here: josie’s conversations on revenge with boki and ruth, till walking around town with audrey, every part of the brakemen reunion but i especially got a huge laugh out of oz and till doing rock paper scissors in the middle of a firefight, ruth in the hospitality room one last time, javi getting revenge for ben via the spring doll, and the delightful bit in the finale where ruth finds sykes and z-wreck in the middle of having broken out of lockup offscreen.

despite how rushed everything is, nima really is a lot of fun. i truly feel absolutely nothing for milius (lol), but nima is often a delight to watch. the build-up during his argument with melanie, cross-cutting with wilford explaining who nima really is, is one of the best-executed scenes this season. i think in an “ideal” version of this show, in like the novel retelling or whatever (hire me amc), we would have had him built up before he actually appears- in a flashback in season 2, or being mentioned by melanie and ben a couple times. that might make it more obvious that alex is his kid, but it was barely a reveal by the time it happened anyway. (the scene where he sees her sketches and says “wow, did you draw this?” had me grinning, truly an absent father.) by the way: i think he and melanie should have legit dated. i think their dynamic is more interesting with that idea in mind.

i imagine there was some sort of real life restriction here, but i think my big change i would make this season, rather than a small tweak for character arc/plot arc purposes, is that i would have audrey be slightly less ill and put her into the javi-sykes-oz storyline. i mentioned in my last post that i think new eden letting layton’s crew take the train can be fixed by having someone argue that it’s as much about saving everyone on snowpiercer as it is saving liana, and that person should probably be audrey, who was there and who has always felt strongly about her community. i think she’d bounce off of oz and sykes in particular in interesting ways, and it allows time to set up that she’s nervous about her scars and potential lung damage, which kind of comes out of nowhere. also it is WILD that we never see her find out wilford died. like, bonkers.

it sucks to me that people were so down on the season by the time we got to the end, because for what it’s worth, the finale was clearly written with such love for the show and it makes me sad we got it in the circumstances we did. storming the train one last time, season one style! melanie on the intercom! martin colvin showing up and z-wreck complimenting his fighting skills! josie talking about pike and the other dead tailies in her part of the intro! astrid and miss gillies at the party! none of this really happens without people who really care about the show writing it, which is what i mean when i say that i think this was a first draft, not a completely bad one.

favorite relationships this season…i’ve already posted what i think about javi/sykes (it’s very good and i’m rotating them a lot). layton telling alex about wilford dying reminded me that i really enjoy their dynamic- in a world where alex has endless dad problems, layton’s a different kind of adult figure in her life. till and ben’s friendship was great. and i really did like melanie and alex together again, and layton and melanie being the center of the story at the end.

and that’s snowpiercer! it actually doesn’t feel like it’s over. in fact, i keep getting haunted by a sort of “do the characters know their problems are over? does that feel wrong to them?” style story…which could either be a fic about grief or a full pathologic style piece of wall-breaking metafiction about being in a story that’s ended. uh…i do plan on rewatching the first three seasons after work travel season ends in a couple weeks. watch this space i guess.

[phoenix-is-the-hottest-thing]

What are your opinions on mobius?

*stares at current icon, which is Mobius in a santa outfit, drawn by my friend @cloud-ya*

She’s my favorite character

To be a bit less meme-y and more detailed, her chapter in ER is my favorite part of Honkai— she’s hyped up JUUUST right, painted as this deranged mad scientist and villain, and then you peel back the story through upgrading the vessels and talking to other characters more and you realize there’s more to her.

I love that.

Mobius is undoubtedly fucked up. She’s lacking a bunch of morals, and the ones she does have, like specifically ensuring consent to her experiments (the Sim didn’t but the real one reportedly did) can be very… contractual. Like how she gets Hua to agree to experiments by pushing her— sure, she said yes, but she said yes because they’re desperate and Mobius is insisting, and agreeing to retrieve the box didn’t mean agreeing to get possessed for science. Obviously this isn’t true consent, but on a technicality it respects Mobius’s moral code. It’s like a kid getting asked whether they ate yet who pops a single candy in their mouth then says yes. Honestly I relate to that dhdhdhf

I like this contrast, though!

Another fun thing is that she’s probably the eldest of the Flame-Chasers, and the one who’s worked with MOTH the longest, and she absolutely does not have the patience to be. She’s also super autistic? I relate to her a lot. Did you know that when she gets mad she just plops herself on her couch and pops bubble wrap for hours. Iconic work ethic. I love her.

Her stubborn fascination with life and death leads her to subvert some mad scientist tropes, for example her insistence to humanize the MANTIS. There’s also the way she treats her assistants and creations, very unusual for the archetype which tends to be all SCIENCE and no time to raise anybody.

If you paid attention, for all that she can troll them or punish them a little, she’s never cruel and nurtures them properly.

When she hears Fuxi and Nuwa messed up and tried to hide it she makes them copy the lab safety rules, this was very much a pedagogical decision with their safety in mind, not her taking her anger out on them. In fact I don’t think she really does that at any moment?

Even the Sim (more morally dubious already) attacking Mei is doing it with a set purpose, nothing personal. For such an overtly malicious character she… doesn’t actually act on malice very much lol. At most she’s very selfish, and her curiosity drives her to perform cruel actions, rather than an intent to harm. The rest of the time she’s quite serious, wants what’s best for everyone, on paper that’d be quite pleasant uh?

When there’s interpersonal friction it usually comes down to what you can easily read as neurodivergence; Elysia and Hua observe that Mobius makes no difference between herself and others. In other words, she assumes that what SHE can tolerate, anyone can or should be able to, which isn’t true. Struggling with that stuff is very autistic coded. I relate. It makes her struggles and everyone demonizing her more tragic, too. I’d wager that everyone calling her names and alienating her greatly contributed to her cynical ways, making the issue worse.

Despite all that though, she treats her creations well, and instead of trying to control them she makes a point of giving them the freedom to be themselves and supports their choices, even if she doesn’t agree with them (like trying to push ELF Klein away by showing her what working together would be like, because she thought Klein wouldn’t be able to handle it, but since Klein could she gave up and accepted both that she had projected her anxieties and Klein’s own choice).

Big subversion to mad scientist tropes there! This leads to pretty much all of her creations adoring her (aside from the Sim but like, self-hatred go brrrr).

It makes lots of sense when you keep in mind that she’s also a child abuse survivor. She claims she throws her creations to the wolves because even humans are only left to themselves, but she’s lying.

The sim sacrifices herself for Klein’s sake (both of them lovingly protect and raise Klein), the real one leaves a loving message for her sim, to the Gray Serpents of the early days she was so important that they dedicated themselves to understand what it would mean to follow her wish to be free by CREATING MULTIPLE CULTS, and they still lowkey worship her as their creator after 50 000 years…

Yeah she cares a lot. She cares a lot about Griseo too, as well as other Flame-Chasers, like Eden, Vill-V or Elysia (despite being annoyed).

Her relationship with Vill-V is also interesting, because when Mobius realizes she’s similar to herself, her first impulse is to kill her immediately. Ultimately she doesn’t, but it was really a “recognition of the self through the other (derogatory)” moment. She also warns Vill-V multiple times about the weight of failure, and I think she pretty much sees herself fifteen years younger in her— a brilliant neurodivergent scientist with a few moral screws loose about to get smacked with the reality of the Apocalypse. Really can’t see this as romantic but ymmv.

TLDR

My opinion is that she’s just full of interesting character depth and I just eat that up, especially since I have a particular fondness for morally dubious mom types that care very much deep down.

[bibiana112]

Kinda weird question- do you have any links to people talking about Mira from ZTD and ableist stereotypes? I mentioned that I was uncomfortable with her portrayal but kinda fumbled it and made some other ND people in chat uncomfortable. I searched for various keyword combinations but most of what I'm finding is like "and not to mention the ableism with Mira" and doesn't elaborate lol.

Not weird at all! And uh, you see, there's a recent post I made where what I complain about is the very fact I've never seen anyone post too in-depth about her at all, I'd love to see posts that do elaborate on that but I do not have any that I know of right now, sorry :/ hopefully someone else who sees this can point to one? Okay!! After some tag searches I have found exactly one post who kind of gets into it I like this take still would love to see. more than just one but hooray

And like though I complain I couldn't elaborate much on it myself I don't think, I believe most of the posts people make about Saito from aitsf would apply since it's a different uchikoshi take on the very same trope of "emotionless characters who cannot function without killing others" I guess he's a worse portrayal though since she's at least not stated to get reward brain chemicals when killing people and I guess her case also has the added layer of "femme fatale" to it? Which either makes it less bad or worse depending on where you approach it from As I said I am not doing a good job of being coherent on this oh and also there's her being "redeemed" and "cured" in the epilogue which in on itself is kinda not great to imply it just goes away like that and honestly I personally don't even buy it I think she'd just be like oh okay Akane over here has like a thousand reasons to hate me after all that oh and what's that she's the leader of a super wealthy underground organization who's organized one of these death traps before yeah no I'm better off going to prison I'll be fine there lmao bye

But I'll say as an autistic person with relatively low empathy I usually see a character who just doesn't understand other people's feelings and wants to feel them too and is just trying to survive despite getting no help and I just kinda go hm. yeah. shout-out to roxas kingdom hearts shout out to mary from ib shout out that's why I started hyperfixating on media art helps me with understanding others a great lot and Mira is just in a story too badly executed for me to care or even begin to wrap my head around tbh like god she's so fucking terribly used as a plot device in every conceivable way that it makes it difficult to see past it and into what she could possibly be if it weren't for the stereotype of equalling low empathy with no compassion what's with her killing off screen in ways that wildly deviate from her stated m.o? why or how was she even in cahoots with Zero why was that a thing? Honestly her dynamic with Sean could have been better fleshed out could have done something interesting about robot child and his aspd big sis but we just kind of don't get any attention brought to the subject of emotions and the authenticity there of except for the "reveal"...

YOU KNOW WHAT that's probably one huge reason it feels so fucked up actually! Like the whole fucking game is written so you could experience it in whatever order you want and therefore Mira being a serial killer at all is something that though not very well hidden it also cannot be a topic of discussion or explored Ever ever because the player may not have seen the fragment where that is revealed yet- problem being the menu design of that game sucks so bad and practically everyone gravitates towards the same few more interesting looking thumbnails first and then the rest is kinda just there, I mean that is part of the reason A Lot of characters feel half-baked I think but also I think it definitely does impact perception of her character specifically probably The Most and then there's just the general not being given nuance not being able to see the minutiae of how that disorder manifests in her character aside from the killings about how she acts aside from being overly flirty trying to lure in Eric but that affects pretty much all of the new cast we don't have last names and in her case we barely have any backstory at all like Saito is a harmful stereotype sure but we get So Much Context for him that people still love talking about him and delving into different aspects of his life since we have that very well telegraphed in the narrative meanwhile for Mira all we can do is fill in the blanks guesswork that only highlights the worst aspects of the surface level portrayal we got and ultimately that people just don't care enough to dissect because there isn't much there character wise once you remove it

[chthonicgodling]

@duck-n-clover - [from the replies of this post] more about Rane being born in avengers tower you say???????

GIGGLES WEEEEELLLL IF YOU INSISTTTTTT .,,, it’s time to MAKE LOKI REALLY MAD BY TELLING THIS STORY-

cw for uh. lol. childbirth????

So Lemme just say. despite my modern day constant humiliating insistence of pretending the mcu is not a thing that exists, even despite still clutching EeL desperately in my claws for over a decade - it is I guess time to admit that the mcu is… in fact, and of course, partially canon to the Elysium’verse.., BUT only up to the events of 2012 (you know). In that peak post avengers haze of “everyone is friends and family and living together in the tower” bliss world. THATS where Elysium exists lmao. ALSO IMPORTANT THOR IS BACK ON ASGARD AND DOES NOT LIVE WITH THEM

NOWADAYS this is not relevant in ANY way other than Loki’s continued presence here and - lmao honestly I forget all the time that technically he’s. well.

but it’s OBVIOUSLY ughhhhhh not a secret that I was deeply into ~things~ back then and for quite some time after, so yes the avengers exist in here obviously and yes they had aaaaall interacted tangentially with aaaaall your fave Elysium characters, although - at least as far as fenixe and I together were concerned - primarily just as cameo characters. A point of contact and team of allies in the mortal world, interacting usually through Tory and Epi (Prince of the Underworld, and his Advisor).

That’s all a Liiiiittle bit more context for what I’m about to explain so NOW allow me to go on a huge tangent to loop around to finally explaining wtf I’m talking about 😌 under the cut for mercy

When deities have babies, pregnancy side effects beyond the usual list varies a little bit more than in mortals, and more specifically to gods. As a godling develops in utero, along with developing physically they have an entire realm of magical powers and abilities developing steadily as well!! this sudden growth of baby powers can very often interfere with the existing magic abilities of the deity carrying the baby, at varying degrees of intensity depending on a number of factors, or even just exactly how powerful that baby will be. Best and most often case scenario— a malfunctioning of basic god abilities like teleporting. Worst case scenario - losing powers completely, those basic ones or even ALL powers like for example when Maci had been pregnant with Neo and she’d completely lost everything even her pyrokinesis, let alone the Neo specific side effects(that’s a story for another post)— or when Epi was pregnant with Ty and Bel and he completely lost the ability to shapeshift. Etc, etc.

Now, Loki’s magic isn’t inherent to being a god like in the Greek pantheon - as a different breed of god, Loki’s powers stem from HIS own specific innate ability (called seidr in Asgard, found in many but mostly actually accessed and practiced by goddesses which. is a whole other fucked up thing loki had to deal with, fucking sorcery gender roles, whatever 🙄 well good thing Loki’s a woman too when he feels like it!!! Representation win! this Norse chaos god IS nonbinary!!)

ANYWAY his powers come from his own ability that he had THEN honed and trained and practiced for hundreds of years to perfect. Rane was Loki’s eighth pregnancy, and though the previous seven times had found Loki’s abilities indeed slightly dampened — making him indeed slightly more vulnerable — Loki had always had an iron grip control of his own seidr enough to prevent any of his burgeoning children from affecting him TOO dramatically through the durations of those pregnancies. Howeverrrrrrrr by the time Loki was pregnant with Rane, Loki’s inherent magic was actually… different. Enhanced. Extremely enhanced.

If you’ll recall, a few years prior, he had absorbed all of the magic of the Underworld, and though that had significantly boosted his own abilities, it also proved a new and exciting challenge to learn and wrangle! A type of magic inherently MORE unruly! ……..so………

those two things in mind — the effects of a growing godling + a much more naturally chaotic magic source in Loki — resulted in a pregnancy in which ALL of Loki’s magic abilities went COMPLETELY haywire.

beyond being a source of all sorts of comedic accidental hijinks - things that naturally occur when you have an overpowered very pregnant chaos god with suddenly no ability to fully control the magic at his fingertips - Loki’s abilities to do very basic things such as shapeshifting or teleporting became much more unreliable, the powers coming and going in surges. This is important background info!

Are we following me still okay good. nowwww The second important variable has to do with the relationships Loki was involved with at the time as well. So Through the course of his pregnancy with Rane, remember the latter stages of it found Tory pregnant with Eisa and Einmyria along with that chaos (when Tory briefly left the palace he’d actually camped out in the avengers tower cause he figured Loki would not - and currently, COULD not - get over there!). But the early stages of it also found Loki’s relationship-friendship with Flower Nymph (Rane’s other parent, currently being retconned and redone) turned upside down again.

They’d just broken up and agreed cautiously and tersely to just be friends when Loki realized he was pregnant with her child and, though Flower Nymph was not the type of person to start a vicious fight, she WAS deeply upset enough by Loki pulling away from her even with baby for them to start gently bickering again - Loki didn’t want anyone near him while he was pregnant not even her, she did NOT like that, He fully disappeared on her after specifically promising not to do that, yknow, like an asshole- I know he’s traumatized but it IS so hard to defend him sometimes fgkfkfk - before sheepishly returning, him then trying to pull away again ANYWAY. It all revolves around Loki being , yes traumatized but BEYOND THAT, being generally emotionally stunted and completely unwilling or unable to let her inside the many walls he’d built up, this was why they broke up in the first place!! but now even worse with the baby. (Everyone told him he was being a dick to her, it’s worth mentioning…… he WAS??????? honestly SHE broke up with him all of the times but it was ALL his fault every time fgkfk gOD—)

Eventually - once the drama with Eisa and Einmyria died down and everything was stable enough again - that Flower Nymph decided that she’d had enough of Loki. it was just!! enough!! she deserved better!!! Loki clearly didn’t want anything to do with her no matter how hard she’d tried for their sake and his sake and the sake of unborn baby Rane but finally his behavior was too much and so she ran away. Where else to go to avoid seeing Loki again than of course to……. that one place he wouldn’t and COULDNT go……

When she sought sanctuary in the avengers tower, they let her stay and gave Tory a courtesy call to notify him that she was someplace safe, in case anyone had been looking. Of course once she was gone was the second Loki whined about getting her back 🙄 and HE’D been looking for her. Tory spoke to her and she - ughghhh despite herself still with such affection for him jesus christ - asked him to just let Loki know where she was and that she was safe. Tory let Loki know, and then told him in no uncertain terms to leave her and the avengers the fuck alone - Loki was INSULTED AND FURIOUS that she would gO STAY AT THE HOME OF HIS MORTAL ENEMIES OF ALL PEOPLE!??? And sulked about it for QUITE some time, though he stayed away for her sake. Vali and Nari visited her a few times though (they’d always been close with her🥹)

Aaaaand then days later Loki’s water broke.

Naturally Loki.,, Disobeying everyone’s direct orders,,,., just immediately gathered up his strength to teleport straight into the middle of the avengers tower to collect Her and tell her that their baby was coming 🤪 cool thanks! The avengers dIDNT ENJOY THIS LOL!?? But SHE was overjoyed that he had returned!

Only one problem though!

Loki’s haywire magic and all of that noxious Underworld essence flowing through his veins and the baby he was now about to give birth to proved to be an AWFUL combo and all at once Loki- became extremely physically ill (vomiting mystery underworld goo gross); COMPLETELY lost the ability to teleport back or— ANYWHERE; and hELLO WAS ALSO!!? going into labor????? Flower nymphs dont teleport either!!!

Tory was called to come collect his pet chaos entity except, new problem - Tory was ALSO pregnant and HIS malfunctioning pregnancy magic could not teleport him AND Loki both back.

…so they called Epi (“…Damn it how do these situations ALWAYS involve him”) except Epi!! just generally like most gods!!! was not strong enough magically to teleport him AND Loki AND Rane AND Tory AND the twins AND Giselle all back to the palace at once and okay you know what we no longer have time to fight about this bc tHERES??? A BABY COMING??????

oh my god, the argument that ensued from an EXTREMELY IRATE INDIGNANT LOKI???? even while Loki was in active labor. and throwing up. to summarize ; along the lines of “ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT” until finally the avengers (at this point primarily just Steve and Tony actually fgkfkf) went into uhh. Crisis business mode and explained tersely Okay well clearly you don’t have much of a choice, you’re either going to have the baby in the middle of our living room or you can move to the bed over there. Finally in increasing desperation Loki agreed - agreed aka being physically dragged to the other room fighting and whining the entire time fgkfkff - so long as all of THEM would go the fuck away somewhere else. okay fine deal whatever! EXCEPT

….next problem was of course due to HAYWIRE MAGIC Loki’s usual ability to give birth in any and every shape was also.,, NOW SUDDENLY malfunctioning. the palace had delivered a good handful of babies by then but no one had ever given anyone an entire c-section 🙃

to Loki’s utter abject misery and FURIOUS MORTIFICATION, Epi and Tory dragged the team back in to just jackass together — well Bruce is a fucking doctor at least kindave — oh my gods you cANNOT BE SERIOUS—

and so, in one of the single most humiliating moments of Loki’s life, Rane was delivered via emergency c-section in the avengers tower by Dr. Banner himself.

this is a fun and cool way to interact with your archnemesises.

Loki has stayed away from all of them forever and ever and ever after, lmfao.

I’ll end this thread of utter ridiculous insanity with the following canon convo snippet quote lmao,

Loki: “So am I to be penalized for going and fetching Giselle of my own accord?”

Tory:  “No, you already got your punishment. […] The guy who smashed you into concrete gave you a c-section.”

Loki: ….the heaviest of sighs

thank you for giving me the slightest opportunity to spit out another whole essay! THERES SO MUCH CHAOS IN HERE BUT THE END

bats my eyelashes. part of me to this day wants to completely divorce ALL remnants of the mcu from Elysium but then part of me…. Remembers this happening and it’s still one of the funniest things that’s ever happened ever and so we can never change it fgkfkflflskdmgkf gOD -

[featherymainffins]

I guess it's so funny to me because I think it is quite literally the opposite of the role he wants to inhabit? Like uh this isn't a think piece at all, I'm just spitting words randomly but

Haunting the narrative is a passive act. Yes, technically speaking, you set it into motion and it is your doing, but you are not present for it and much of it relies on others acting upon your lack of presence.

And yes, we could argue that the role of the mastermind, which is the role that he does fulfill in the narrative, is also defined by absence (the mastermind is not seen, only their actions are), and we could argue about the passivity vs activity of the role, but the main difference is that the mastermind is in direct control. The mastermind is the spider weaving the web and the chess master moving the pieces.

Haunting the narrative takes control away from you in a way. You do have control initially, but everything else is out of your hands. Haunting the narrative is effectively being like God: you create something in your hands, set it free and then leave, and everything that happens afterwards is nothing you can interfere in.

So haunting the narrative is passive, marked by your absence, and something you cannot control. The very nature of haunting the narrative means that you do not control anything. You threw the dice and now they are rolling: Rose Quartz / Pink Diamond died of her own will, now the dice are rolling; the author of the Journals is is gone but he left them behind, now the dice are rolling (yes, this one applies only until a certain point in the story); Alrick died, now the dice are rolling; Madoka erased herself from existence, now the dice are rolling (specifically about Rebellion); Lisa burned on the pyre, now the dice are rolling; the scientist created Adamant and died, now the dice are rolling (actually funnily enough I feel like Lapis Lazuli might be a BIGGER ghost in the narrative despite the fact that the scientist basically literally caused the whole existence of HnK); whatever the fuck WD Gaster has going on i guess;...and many more examples

(An example that I might get stoned for is Durge. Durge died in all but the body and as such they are not at all present in the story yet their lingering ghost has an undeniable impact on your character no matter what kind of person you choose to play as. This is my subjective interpretation and I recognise that a lot of people don't see it that way, but I consider pre-story events Durge dead. If you took my mind and erased all my memories and me as a whole and let me out into the world I wouldn't consider that person me at all. I'd be dead. That person would have just inherited my body.)

The role of the mastermind is one that I personally consider passive, but in sharp contrast to haunting the narrative, it's all about having control. The plot is entirely yours to command. A literal example of this is Makima from Chainsaw Man, who is the Control devil. A more traditional example is Jonah Magnus / Elias Bouchard from The Magnus Archives. Or Mother Miranda from Resident Evil, whose dead daughter is haunting the narrative as a nice bonus (on technicality. The game itself does not seem very concerned with the implications, for some reason). Many such cases etc etc we could be here forever.

It's sorta like a sword/shield thing - the sword and the shield both belong to the knight and both are used in battle, but they are not the same thing.

I forgot where I was going with this actually.

[floofanflurr]

Hi! I just read your fanfic, 'Heart on a Table' and gosh--It was so amazing!! I was hooked all the way from the start! Most importantly I liked the fact that atleast someone realised the fact that--Despite everything, Frisk is not ok. Like, they are stuck in a place where everyone wants them dead, and completely, utterly alone. And it's like people forget the fact that if it weren't for their determination and resets--Frisk would probably be dead. I Just--thank you for recognising what Frisk went through.

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

(This response is getting long so uh… let me put it under a cut:)

When I first started writing Heart on the Table around… 2 and a half years ago now? I think? (It won’t match the posting date! I wrote a first draft before I started posting online.) Yeah, when I first started writing it, there was… well, there was a pretty big lack of content about things actually addressing what happens to Frisk from a more realistic point of view.

People always treated them like this holy savior, or scorned them when they made a few mistakes, and I always struggled to find fanfiction where the monsters are forced to acknowledge “hey, no, wait, this is a KID. And this… is really fucked up, honestly.” And also for what happened to have a real impact on Frisk. Because, well, I’m pretty sure being murdered by the people you grow to love is incredibly traumatic????? Or even just being beaten within an inch of your life. There’s a lot of real impactful things that that could do to a child’s psyche—PTSD and self worth issues being only part of it.

There were, of course, a couple fanfictions with that I could find! But it was very few and far between.

(And of course, I’m a sucker for a LOT of different ut fanfiction- I’m not saying that stories have to do this! Just that it was a type of story I was looking for and couldn’t find.)

So!!! I wrote Heart on the Table! I tried to do a decent amount of research into child psychology, and the impacts of trauma on a child, and just… I tried to tackle it from a more sensitive, but also a more realistic perspective about what being hurt by your loved ones (while saying that it’s all for the greater good! That you HAVE to die for them to be happy! That you are being hurt because YOU are the problem!!!) would do to a child. …And, how that could lead to the personality traits we see in game.

To my utter delight, it’s easier to find this kind of content nowadays—(I wonder if Undertale Yellow had a hand in that?)—so I’m not one of the only ones outputting that kind of content (art and fics, etc.)

…to my less delight, I haven’t had time to read it! ALAS!

Sorry for the utter ramble here! Just!!! Thank you so much!!! It always delights me when people comment on the core reason Heart on the Table was written. (There were multiple factors and wants of course, but THIS is probably the whole driving force behind the story in the first place.)

[wyldblunt]

1, 4, 5 and 6 for the multiple commanders ask! (@where-is-caithe)

IM SO LATE OOPS i did actually answer all these previously so i'll copy-paste them here!

1. At what point during the story do they meet up?

they first meet in person early on in the personal story -- before the formation of the pact, but when trahearne is already thinking about it. we have a kind of slight canon divergence thing where when trahearne starts tentatively prodding the orders about his pact ideas, alan and glyn are the vigil and whispers representatives that he pulls in for early meetings.

but!!! at this point, it turns out, alan and glyn were already penpals! they had started some work-related correspondance about weaponry -- glyn was referred to alan by a mutual colleague -- and then they just kept exchanging letters even after alan had gotten the answers he needed. when they met, glyndwr was really surprised to find that the person with whom he'd been exchanging enthusiastic letters about the most efficient ways to explode the risen was in fact.... this extremely straight-laced, radiant, do-gooder vigil poster boy. he tried to wiggle out of the friendship at first bc alan's whole Aura Of Goodness made him extremely uncomfortable but alan did not allow it.

4. Did they have different responsibilities in the Pact?

yes! alan slots more into the "commander as the face of the pact," "hero of tyria" role -- something he's already perfectly geared towards due to being previously used as a recruitment poster boy for the vigil (something he eventually comes to resent). glyndwr, on the other hand, stays pretty firmly entrenched as a whispers lightbringer the whole time, does his best to stay out of the spotlight (something that falls apart pretty quickly after they take down zhaitan and only gets worse), and also is eventually heavily involved with the pale reavers, which alan isn't. basically, despite also being a commander and being heavily involved with the pact, glyn stays more in the overall role of a whispers consultant vs. alan is still very connected with the vigil but his actual activities end up leaning way more general/pact-focused.

5. Did all of them, only a few, or just one of them go through the dungeon storylines?

COUGHS. this is when i reveal i have done like. almost none of the dungeons and neither has my wife. so uh. i don't know, and we will get back to you on that.

i DO know that twilight arbor ends up cropping up in their stories at some point but we haven't hammered out the details at all. actually the only thing i know about twilight arbor and our canon has nothing much to do with alan and glyn at all -- callas manipulated the nightmare nobility involved in the explorable version to all show up there and get killed on purpose, specifically so she could steal their retinues.

6. Did they chase after Caithe together or was one/were some on the airship with Trahearne during the start of HoT?

neither of them chase after caithe! at least, not the way that it's written, because (in our shared opinion) the way it's written is absolutely fucking whack especially for a sylvari commander. (if the commander is so wildly hostile to caithe that it even strikes me as out of character and out of pocket for GLYNDWR, who literally does not like her and has never gotten along with her, it's even more bonkers for a more level-headed, generally grove-aligned sylvari commander like alan).

glyndwr actually has a full breakdown early on where, enraged by the way he and his troops are being treated by non-sylvari (with rytlock as the last straw), he basically just. says "fuck literally all of you" and bails, leaving his signature daggers buried in a tree by the central verdant brink camp so nobody will waste search parties looking for him. (they send search parties anyway bc he had not considered the fact that like, People Care About You?) at the end of this furious bender he coincidentally ends up in tarir anyway, which is where he regroups with the main cast. during all of this, alan IS trying to find caithe, but he absolutely believes it's a misunderstanding and that things will be cleared up when they have a chance to talk. [STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA] WHICH IT FUCKING IS

glyndwr's disappearance, however brief it was, does MASSIVE damage to pretty much all of his relationships and is the beginning of the end of his romance with alan. he probably would've been really susceptible to the call if alan hadn't handled it with as much grace as he did, though -- alan is fucking PISSED, but he doesn't take it out on glyn in the moment, bc for him the most important thing is keeping everyone together and maintaining solidarity and morale. it's what he's best at.

[haloguyfttp]

Was watching some playthrough of Penacony and one line from Himeko always jumps out to me. It got long so putting the read more if you actually wanna bother.

When confronting Sunday before the final battle (fake), there's a brief back and forth during which Himeko says something like "If people are to be free there must be nothing and noone above them."

But this sentence has a problem, and it's one I really wish HSR would actually seriously sit down to deal with, but much like Genshin's Fatui we're probably gonna wait forever since they almost definitely have it planned for further down the line, and the writers are strangely neutral about these extremely questionable groups and their actions.

The IPC control fucking everything. Sunday would've controlled at most the system Penacony was in. Maybe more if he managed to fully ascend, but there's more Aeons so he'd get their attention if he succeeded which is its own can of worms, but anyways. No matter where you go elsewhere, even the fucking Xianzhou Alliance has to deal with the IPC's bullshit, albeit they can at least stand on equal footing.

If the IPC truly wanted, they can nuke planets like in Chadwick's quest. They can colonize planets like they tried with Belobog (and succeeded with countless others). They can do whatever they want. That to me is far more pressing than Sunday, who at worst would be yet another Aeon who ultimately doesn't do anything outside their determined path.

Yet Himeko, and in fact nobody in this damn game, seems to care. Unless the IPC comes for wherever we happen to be, we don't even seem to care either. If we went to Penacony just a bit faster, they would already own Belobog.

More than anything else about HSR, this is my #1 gripe with the story as it is. The IPC only gets flak if they take it too far, like the planet nuking in Chadwick's quest, or Belobog nearly being sold for a false promise. Not to mention if the story goes where some think it will and the Aeons are destroyed or de-powered or anything like that.... the IPC would be even more solidified at the top.

My biggest concern is they won't acknowledge this. Sure they're different games and teams but I get the worst flashbacks to the Fatui given barely any consequences to their actions despite the uh.... everything that they've done.

Also as a final aside, the Chadwick quest doesn't even truly touch the IPC. Much of the focus is on Chadwick, and how his desire to make the nuke overshadowed his knowledge the IPC would likely use it for their own gain. But the quest has no interest in exploring why the fuck can 1 corporation choose to destroy multiple planets unregulated. Like, Screwllum's already here, why isn't this a launching point for some actual action to restrict the IPC's power?

Whatever I've rambled long enough. Maybe they'll finally deal with this in several years, or maybe I'm just drowning in wishful thinking. But the lack of interest in actually tackling the IPC scares me for HSR's overall future story. Especially since they continue making them more important with the Stonhearts and shit, and not in the way one builds up actual antagonists but more in a "hey get excited for these new characters" which is fucking working somehow. The outcome I'm most afraid of is that the entire story will happen yet the IPC will continue being this ultimate power and no one will question it for some reason.

[rnelodyy]

c!Dream and the rules

(/dsmp /rp, all names refer to characters, not content creators)

I think one of the most striking parts of Exile is something that I rarely see talked about, and it’s Dream’s rules. Or rather, how his rules were made to be used as justification to hurt Tommy.

The thing about exile is that, outside of the initial rule of “Don’t go back to L’Manburg”, Dream never told Tommy the rules, yet constantly operated under the assumption that Tommy already knew them, and had accepted them. The rules also changed constantly, without Tommy ever being notified until he was already in trouble.

The second time Dream told Tommy to put his armor in the hole, he didn’t tell Tommy to do that right away. Instead, the conversation went like this (slightly edited to remove stammering and unrelated dialogue).

Dream: Do you have, uh… something you wanna put on the floor here? Tommy: Yes. (drops two pieces of red concrete as Dream digs a hole) Dre-eam! You’re evil. You’re evil. Dream: Anything else, Tommy? Tommy: Nope! Dream: Oh c’mon, I know there’s something else you wanna drop down here. Tommy: (panicking slightly) No, there… (messages BBH “take this and run”, throws him the disc BBH had gifted him earlier) Um… I don’t reckon there is! (pause) Dream: Okay, are you suuuure? Tommy: YES. Dream: Alright… How ‘bout your armor, Tommy? Tommy: Well, no, this is- I actually earned this myself. Dream: I know you did! Tommy: Leave me alone. Dream: Just drop it in the hole, Tommy. Tommy: Wh- no, NO, you can’t just come and demand things from me! I’ve been exiled, I’ve done your shit, what do you mean?! Dream: (sing-song) Tommy… Tommy: What? (Dream hits Tommy with his axe, taking over half his health) Tommy: (screams, drops his armor) OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAY!

The only rule Tommy was aware of at this time was that he wasn’t allowed to go back to L’Manburg. Dream had taken his armor the night before, but there was no indication that he expected Tommy to do this constantly. Taking his armor upon initially arriving at Logstedshire made some kind of sense, allowing Tommy to keep it would run the risk of him trying to fight his way back into L’Manburg. Taking his new, very shitty armor (seriously it was an iron chestplate and a pair of golden leggings he got from a ruined portal chest) made no sense at all, so the fact that Tommy was confused and refused to cooperate at first isn’t unexpected in the slightest.

And the thing is… Dream was aware of this fact. Throughout the conversation, he never really sounded annoyed, and was actively teasing Tommy at times. This isn’t a good thing btw, it’s a sign that he was fully aware that Tommy didn’t know what he wanted from him, and that that would create a situation where Dream could “put him in his place” as it were.

If you’re a parent, and your kid does something that’s not allowed, without knowing it’s not allowed, you don’t start off with a beating. You sit them down, calmly explain the rules to them and explain why those rules are there, then send them on their way with the knowledge that they shouldn't do it again.

This interaction wasn’t an instance of Tommy acting out and Dream correcting him. This interaction was a trap. Dream set Tommy up to fail by not telling him the rules beforehand, and when Tommy offered even the slightest bit of resistance and asked why he needed to drop his armor, Dream jumped straight to beating him. It’s a powerplay, plain and simple.

This is demonstrated again with the destruction of Logstedshire. Dream got pissed that Tommy disobeyed him by having hidden chests with gear under his house, and retaliated by destroying everything Tommy had built, destroying every item he’d collected, killing his pet and only foodsource, barring him from the Nether, banning everyone except himself from visiting, and telling him to start over from scratch after a whole lecture about how Tommy betrayed him.

Again, I wanna point out some specific lines from this lecture that illustrate my point very well.

Dream: You were lying to me! You were lying to me. Tommy: No- Why was I lying?! Dream: What do you mean, why were you lying?! Tommy: I wasn’t hi- I wasn’t- Dream: You hid things in a chest knowing they were things I wouldn’t want you to have! And you hid it in a way that way I would never find it!

Except Tommy didn’t know that. The contents of the stash were all items that Tommy had obtained previously without any issue (diamonds, emeralds, iron, ender pearls, some pickaxes, and some purely sentimental items like flowers, a jukebox, and pictures of Tubbo and L’Manburg). In fact, the vast majority of them came from Tommy’s aboveground storage, which Dream had full access to, and had looked through before!

Dream also never said Tommy wasn’t allowed to hide stuff, and there was nothing to suggest he didn’t want Tommy to keep secrets from him.

There’s been a theory floating around for a while that Dream knew about Tommy’s item stash beforehand, since it was a very strange place to dig a hole (like, right in front of the house in the center of Logstedshire itself, instead of out in the plains where the TNT wouldn’t damage any structures), and Tommy had previously forgotten to cover up the entrance ladder. While Dream hadn’t looked inside the house, he would’ve definitely heard Tommy place the block back.

If this theory is correct, then this was yet another trap. Dream knew Tommy had a hidden room, and instead of just saying “hey, I don’t want you to have a hidden stash, go put this back and fill in the room” (which would’ve still been bullshit btw), he went COMPLETELY ballistic, destroyed EVERYTHING Tommy had, and while doing it, kept admonishing Tommy for betraying him, said shit like “I thought we were friends”, and even accused him of preparing to attack Dream. Again, a powerplay.

Hell, even the exile conflict itself is this! Tommy was exiled for griefing the king’s property while being a high-ranking official in L’Manburg. Except Fundy, the then-president’s son, CONSTANTLY griefed Eret’s shit after the L’Manburg war, ranging from ripping down one of their towers to “shrink” it, filling another tower with water, and multiple elaborate plots to steal the throne from under their nose. But apparently, between all of that shit and the exile-conflict, the rules were silently changed, meaning Dream could exile Tommy for breaking a couple blocks and placing some rude signs in George’s house. Even the punishment itself was changed without warning, as Tommy went from being exiled from L’Manburg to exiled from “everywhere that’s ever been touched.”

...I was originally gonna make a different point here. I may put it in the reblogs, because I still think it’s very interesting. But, in the middle of writing this essay I had to stop because it was late, then I spent the entire next day packing up because I’m in the middle of a move. It's now the next evening, I'm sat in my new room, on my camping bed, I opened this doc because I pretty much forgot what I typed, I reread it, and then I realized… This isn’t an isolated series of events. This is a pattern for Dream.

Before Tommy first joined the server, there were only three set rules: no stealing, no griefing, and no killing people. Except by that point, those rules weren’t enforced at all. In fact, Dream broke all three at once at one point, by killing George and burning his diamond armor because he didn’t feel it was fair that George got to run around in full diamond when everyone else still had iron.

Tommy joined the server, and broke the rules like everyone else. He stole shit, broke shit, killed George for funsies… and he got exiled for it. Seriously, they dumped him in an empty snowfield for breaking rules that nobody had enforced for weeks. So technically, the Exile-arc isn’t even the first time something like this has happened to him!

During the events that would eventually spark the Disc War, Sapnap stole a bunch of Tommy’s items (including the only Netherite chestplate on the server at the time), and told him he’d only give the stuff back if Tommy helped him with a conflict he had with Ponk. Long story short, Dream tried to intervene and was killed by Tommy and Sapnap, and Dream stole Tommy’s discs to force him to apologize. He then kept the discs, and the Disc War followed. Sapnap, despite being the aggressor and arguably forcing Tommy to participate in the conflict, was never punished.

This proves not only that the rules can change whenever Dream feels like it, but that they’re arbitrarily enforced. Dream refuses to punish his friends for the same crimes he endlessly fucks over Tommy for.

L’Manburg was created in part because of the fact that the rules were unevenly enforced. Tommy, Wilbur, and later Tubbo were repeatedly killed, stolen from, imprisoned, and even held hostage for very minor crimes, while the people killing, imprisoning, kidnapping and stealing from them were able to do so without impunity.

This was also the point where Dream just started making up new rules; there was no rule against having governments on the server, or making a separate area where Dream’s rules wouldn’t apply, so Dream banned governments, and used this new rule as an excuse to kill them, take their items, and tear their land to shreds.

And that’s another thing: the punishments for breaking Dream’s rules are INCREDIBLY harsh.

Kill him non-canonically one time? Your most prized possessions will now be dangled over your head and used to hurt you for the next few months.

Make a country with different laws that doesn’t infringe on anyone’s territory, has no desire to expand, is explicitly pacifistic and open to trade negotiations? You’ll be forced to fight a war you’re in no way equipped to fight, you’ll be betrayed and murdered and have your land destroyed in front of your very eyes until you literally have no choice but to surrender.

Mildly vandalize the king’s house, which nobody else has ever been punished for? You’ll be dragged into court, exiled from your home, and subjected to weeks of abuse until you believe that all of your friends hate you and you actively want to kill yourself.

Hide some stuff in a secret chest? Your only shelter will be exploded, your pet/only food source will be killed, all your items will be destroyed, you’ll be banned from the Nether, and none of your friends will be allowed to come see you.

This is all such disproportionate retribution it’s ridiculous. It’s like punishing someone for speeding by blowing up their car with a ballistic missile.

So to sum up: Dream’s rules are arbitrarily enforced, and he can just straight up make them up on the spot if he feels like it. Sometimes, he won’t tell you a rule exists until you’ve already broken it, and you’re treated as if you broke it out of malice instead of genuine ignorance. And if you do break a rule, and he decides you have to be punished, it will always be a punishment so harsh it doesn’t even ATTEMPT to fit the crime.

I don’t know about you, but that sounds pretty fucking corrupt and tyrannical to me.

When people say Tommy deserved exile, or made Dream spiral into villainy, or abused Dream somehow (seriously I’ve seen this take multiple times and every time it makes my brain melt) by breaking the rules, I would invite them to take a step back and ask themselves, why did that rule exist? Did Tommy know it existed? Was it enforced for everyone other than him as well? Does the punishment fit the crime?

Dream has a bad habit of making up rules, or enforcing old ones that were never enforced before, to punish those who threaten his power. None of the Dream Team were ever punished for anything, despite committing the same crimes as the L’Manburgians. That is, until they founded Mexican L’Manburg (i.e. went against Dream’s rule), at which point they were attacked by Dream and George was dethroned for “not being neutral enough.”

Tommy should’ve faced consequences for what he did. But those consequences should’ve come naturally, and been carried out by the people he hurt. Like, if Dream hadn’t intervened, griefing George’s house would’ve resulted in George griefing Tommy back in revenge. In fact, he DID do that, by turning Tommy’s entire house into granite and putting the Jump In The Cadillac picture on his front lawn.

These are natural, proportionate consequences. Exile was none of that. The Disc War was none of that. Everything that happened to L’Manburg was none of that.

Dream’s rules and how he enforces them are inherently corrupt and tyrannical. To pretend it’s anything but is disingenuous at best.

[onecanonlife]

okay i have processed enough to write my initial thoughts i think. still haven’t watched everything that happened today (i.e. sapnap’s stream, jack’s stream, techno after tommy went live) but. i want to talk a little bit

(also i always get nervous sharing my takes as my anxiety is. bad. so i’ll preface this by saying that i am absolutely not trying to start anything with or go after anyone whose opinions are different lmao. this is all very much /lh)

okay. so. in no particular order

i’ve determined how i feel about c!ranboo’s death. the answer is that i feel very little. i am open to changing this opinion based on others’ reactions (c!tubbo pls return king i’m begging) but currently i am not. mourning. like i did for c!tommy. that ficlet that i wrote was definitely me trying to make myself feel something and it didn’t quite work. that being said, i’m very happy that cc!ranboo’s finally gonna get to tell a story the way he’s wanted to!

c!niki. girl. please.

kind of on that note, i will not lie i normally find techno’s lore streams to be fun, at least. and this stream had its moments that i enjoyed? but overall, was not digging the syndicate pov today. really, really good to have confirmation that c!techno doesn’t actually like c!dream, tho

gonna round out my discussion of the syndicate. c!phil. he fucking fascinates me. i want to shake him and i want to punch him and i want to hug him. i want to be in his brain. i want to give him a reality check. but his interactions with c!tommy today, i honestly thought was one of the highlights of the lore for me. like, he still doesn’t get it. i would really like for him to get it, at some point. i want him to understand why l’manberg is important. and the fact that he went along with c!techno’s plans despite the fact that he knows how fucking awful c!dream is has me seething. but like. at least he’s made it really clear that he’s in c!tommy’s corner. i do enjoy that

okay so. c!tommy. i don’t. i don’t even consider myself an inniter. but the return of c!tommy had me feeling some kind of way let me tell you

it’s been said by so many other people, but cc!tommy’s acting? holy fucking shit. he and dream absolutely killed that moment. that was just. chilling. i don’t even really have the words. (and that blooper was also so fucking funny i love them)

and i’d like to talk for a second about c!tommy’s forgiveness? like, that moment where he forgave c!phil really drove it home for me. he obviously doesn’t agree with him, but i think he saw where c!phil was coming from, decided that c!phil actually believes he was being helpful (which. like. no. but that’s another thing), and so was able to forgive him for it. c!tommy really forgives people very easily. even people who have hurt him very personally. i am not going to make this about c!wilbur i am not going to make this about c!wilbur but c!wilbur as someone holding a gun shooting at someone else and he’s on his side but he still doesn’t feel safe because the gun is still there i am not over this i will never be over this

the walls. god. the walls make him feel safe. i can’t. i fucking can’t

i said i wouldn’t make this about c!wilbur but if c!wilbur doesn’t see the walls and have a fucking emotional breakdown then what even is the point okay sorry i’m done i swear

cannot let c!quackity go unmentioned. like, he is one of the best people to be helping c!tommy rn, because he’s had the whole c!dream-escaped-panic. he’s been there and done that. he’s ready to be effective. he’s ready to do what needs to be done. and he’s decided that what needs to be done is protecting c!tommy. it really doesn’t get any better than that

uh what else. c!sam. my beloved. my beloathed. he’s probably one of the best written characters on the smp. i love him. i hate him. goddddd

this goes without saying, but c!connor absolutely stole the show /hj

[nat-20s]

8 for jmart?

#8- constantly cheacking their messages for words from the other

what else was I gonna do? here's some classic ol' season 3 pining babey

Hello Martin. This is Jon. I have gotten a new phone after losing my last one, please put in the new number.

It's a simple message. Straightforward, factual, and utilitarian. There is no reason that pressing send should make his heart race. There's especially no reason that the second he sends it off, he's tempted to lie on the deeply uncomfortable, likely bedbug infested motel mattress staring at his screen until he gets a response. Sure, he's sick of being overseas, and he's sick of being so isolated, and he's sick of running, but he's not...desperate for what little companionship can even be provided by words on a screen.

He does miss Martin, though. He misses Tim as well, but in a manner that's significantly more complex and knotted than the simple desire to be around him.

God, when did he start wanting to just be around Martin? He started being aware of that want when he was at Georgie's, but he has no idea when the want itself actually started. That was probably something he should examine. Technically speaking, that is something that he has time to examine, but he doesn't want to examine right now. Right now, he wants the comfort of perhaps one of the only people out there that doesn't want to kill him, or use him, or both.

Martin, whether through somehow sensing Jon's discontent from nearly 4000 miles away or, more likely, through a general dutifulness inherent to his character, only takes a few minutes to reply. Oh good! it'd been a little bit since hearing from you, we were somewhat worried. putting you in my contacts as we speak :)!

Saying that "we" were worried is almost certainly generous on Martin's part, but Jon feels no need to point that out. Instead he turns on his side and stares at the phone. He particularly focuses on the smiley face, ridiculously charmed by the fact that, despite everything, Martin hasn't lost his predilection for emojis. Two years ago, he would've rolled his eyes, maybe thought something snide about professionalism. It wouldn't have been fair, as Tim used to do the same thing and he thought nothing of it, but he wasn't fair back then. Now, he simply wonders if he can get away with sending one back.

Before he can respond, Martin sends another message. Are you actually alright? I realized I was kind of assuming that losing your phone was the only reason you were MIA, but is anything else going on?

Damn. He tends to forget how perceptive Martin can be. What, exactly, Martin had perceived in that first message, Jon couldn't be sure, but apparently there was something that tipped him off to the..eventful last week he'd had. He really, really doesn't feel like getting into all of that right now, especially not over text, so instead he replies a mostly truthful I'm fine.

Then, squinting at the screen and realizing that might come across as a dismissal, he adds, Well, other than trying not to contemplate the general sanitation practices of a motel that clearly hasn't updated it's decor since the 70s. I'm suspecting the sheets are much the same.

He doesn't know how Martin will react to the message. He can't see the face he'll make, won't know the tone of his voice. However, he likes to imagine that Martin will at least smile. Maybe he'll even give that breath of a laugh, the one that sometimes happens when Jon's being lightly acerbic and it's not directed at him. He doesn't know, but he does hope for it. Martin texts back Oof. Maybe sleep on top of the covers tonight, yeah?, and Jon thinks that he might have guessed Martin's reaction correctly.

Christ, who knew all it took was a combination of jetlag and threats to turn him into a sap. He needs to sleep. He really needs a deep, proper, uninterrupted sleep, one lasting a minimum of eight hours and ideally closer to fifteen. Checking the time, it would be a fairly reasonable time to sleep, especially with the early start he has tomorrow. He considers sending off a quick good night message, but then has the realization that as reasonable as it is for him to be asleep right now, it's just as unreasonable for Martin to be awake. Are you alright? Good lord, Martin, it's almost 4am over there. Did I wake you?

Barely 30 seconds pass before he gets back no, you're good!

A beat, then a follow up message. I've had a irregular sleep schedule since I was like 16. A lot of evening and night shifts had a lasting impact u know? Working at the institute made it a bit more consistent but it's still p rare that i sleep the same eight hours night to night.

Jon's starts to text back something sympathetic; he's had his own struggles with both in- and hyper- somnia, but his phone buzzes in his hand before he can finish it.

Sorry! That was uh probably more information than you wanted.

Well, that just won't do. Even if there wasn't a part of his brain that had recently started collecting facts about Martin like they were precious jewels instead of mostly mundane stories, he doesn't want Martin to think he can't talk to him about things outside of the standard bounds of coworkers. Not at all. We're friends, Martin, I enjoy learning about you.

His brain wants to catastrophize the second he presses send. For the first minute that Martin doesn't reply, he doesn't let it. After the second minute, he allows the minor worry to become more severe. Had it been too much? Were they friends? Jon certainly thought so, but what if Martin wasn't in the same boat? Their interactions had been entirely friendly for months now, but what if that was just Martin being polite? God, what if Martin still thought of Jon as his boss, nothing more?

Ten minutes. It takes ten minutes for Martin to finally respond, and Jon has almost called him four times to explain himself. Ten minutes, and the first response is only Oh!

Then: Cool

Well, that's not a "piss off and die", but it's not exactly comforting. Jon doesn't know how to reply, staring at the words on his screen and not entirely sure if he's fucked up or not. Fortunately, Martin's not done responding, and the next message is much, much better.

Hey uh. Feel free to say no I know it's getting late over there but. Im not getting back to sleep for the rest of the day and itd be nice to actually hear you. Would you be okay with a call?

Without a moment's hesitation, he texts back Yes!, exclamation and all, because he's become someone he barely recognizes. The phone rings just as immediately, and he feels his entire body relax at Martin's first "Hello?"

Things are difficult right now. Things have been difficult ever since the promotion that was a curse in disguise. The world is filled with monsters he barely understands. He wishes he was home despite the fact that he barely recognizes it, as filled with tension and strife as it is. There's so much to discuss, so many things they should be hammering out. But right now, the threats are not pressing. Right now, he can hear about the bad true crime documentary Martin half-watched before he got Jon's texts, and Jon can bitch about the three different "pip pip cheerio" comments he's gotten since coming over seas. Right now, and for the hour before Jon drifts off, breathing slow and deep, he can pretend that this is an ordinary phone call, in an ordinary world, between two people who simply miss each other an extraordinary amount.

[bubbleteaimagines]

Allo Can I be blessed with some Porco headcanons with a female reader whose from Paradise ;;c;; Both fluff angst n smut >~< Thank uu

Porco dating someone from Paradis Island

Porco Galliard Headcanon

Warnings: NSFW Content

ALSO SPOILERS!! IF YOU HAVENT READ THE MANGA!! I REPEAT SPOILERS!!

when you and porco first met, neither of you knew of the others identity

porco had just gotten back from war and you were there to infiltrate marley for information

in fact, you both seemed to be running from who were supposed to be, just wanting a break from your destinies

this caused you both to somehow end up by the ocean one day, just when the sun was setting

you had been sitting close to the shore, the water lapping at your feet when all of a sudden a voice caught your attention

“hey—! wha—! you’re not supposed to be here!”

not expecting for anyone to actually be down there that time of night, you quickly whipped around with alarm in your eyes

“w-whose there?” you ask nervously, terrified that you were gonna get caught and your cover was gonna be blown

after all, levi had specifically forbid you from wandering off

“the tickle monster— who the hell do you think? no citizens are supposed to—”

when porco finally came into the light and he saw you sitting there, eyes wide as your sundress blew in the wind, he was immediately taken aback

not only were you trespassing, but you were also...different

whether it was your skin, your eyes, or just simply the fact that he had never seen you before, porco was astonished

“i-i’m sorry! please don’t tell! i didn’t mean to, i—”

“hey, hey,” immediately his entire demeanor changed. “don’t worry, i’m not gonna tell. how could i rat out a beautiful lady like yourself?”

from that day forwards, you both were gone

you began to see each other again and again and again, at first just by pure coincidence, but then it soon became intentionally

porco would purposely seek out the pretty girl wearing pretty dresses, and you’d sometimes linger in the marketplace to see if he’d be there

it wasn’t long before you two began hanging out

porco asked to accompany to the beach again and since he was a high ranking eldian he was allowed there

of course, he didn’t tell you that

both of you kept your identies a firm secret, but neither of you knew

you just thought that maybe he was a high ranking soldier and he assumed that you were marleyan bc you didn’t wear an armband

you and porco became extremely close and it wasn’t long before a relationship blossomed

porco was horrible at being romantic, but he tried, he really did try for you

he’d bring you flowers, buy you little things of chocolate bc he knew it was your favorite

he’d try to leave you little love letter in the morning and it’d absolutely melt your heart

he’d spoil you and use his status to take you to the finest restaurants in liberio

sometimes when you were out people would recognize porco, but he’d always keep the interactions brief

when it came to porco, you probably didn’t know much about him

he was kinda closed off, and he wanted to seem strong to you so he never shared much

but that was okay— what he did share was enough for you

when it came to you though, he’d want to know all about you

he could stay up for hours listening to you explain your childhood, leaving out the parts where you were really from

he’d love knowing about you and would hold you close, often falling asleep to your stories

really, porco was a gentle yet protective lover

he could be extremely jealous and it translated into the bedroom

sex with him was rough, with porco being the dominant most of the time

he loved to mark you and degrade you, wanting you to scream out who exactly you belonged to

he’d pound you into the mattress and tell you what a good little slut you were and then he’d make you cum all over him

afterwards, he’s not much for aftercare lol but at least he’d hold you?

if he fell for you quickly then he’d probably introduce you to pieck

and she would LOVE you, thinking how it was cute that porco was so mean to everybody else but so soft around his girl

he likes touching you, that’s for sure

always has an arm slung around you

in all honesty, he’d be an amazing boyfriend and uwu but you know it’s not gonna last...

technically, you and porco were doomed from the start

he was lying to you about who he was, liking the fact that you loved him, not the jaw titan, ‘marley hero.’

you were lying to him, not even from marley and an island devil that they seemed to hate

your love came to a boiling point, eventually

when you both found out who the other truly was, both you and porco were shocked— like hella shocked

you were on the battlefield, defending eren when all of a sudden you spotted porco and pieck from up above

you wanted to scream and abandon everything right then and there, to tell them both to get the hell out of there

but then,,, porco looked up and saw you using ODM gear, wearing the same suit as the people attacking marley

his eyes widened, not even believing it as betrayal and anger seeped through his veins

“y/n!”

you’d be so terrified to face him

you’d probably break down crying and explain that you hadn’t meant for it to be this way— you didn’t mean to lie and yes, you truly did love porco

but then,,, you’d be exposed to his own little secret

as marley soliders began shooting at you, yelling at you to get away from the warriors, porco would suddenly scoop you up and transform to shield you from their bullets

everybody, including your comrades, was absolutely dumbfounded to see him throw you on his back and run away with you

and you’d be literally frozen, not even believing this was happening

“what...the...fuck...”

porco kept you safe during the entire battle, up until he decided to take eren on

you couldn’t lie, even though your relationship was probably gonna be in shambles after that it hurt so bad to see him just laying there, not even knowing if he was alive

you tried to find out, you tried to go towards him and yank him out of his titan but jean swooped in and tackled you at the last second

you were a crying mess but he held you, kicking and screaming and all, not letting go until you were safely on the plane

“jean, please! you guys don’t understand — i have to go back! i have to see—!”

“i’m sorry, y/n, but this is for the best. you have to let go, you may never see him again.”

for the next few months, or years that you were separated from porco, you’d be a hollow mess

It’d take some time for you to forgive him, and him you

for the longest he stayed on marley, bitter and cursing your name

cursing himself for falling in love with an island devil

he hated you, he wanted to kill you...only...he didn’t

deep down porco knew that he still loved you

and he carried that love everywhere with him, even if it tore him apart inside

he was stuck between wanting to be in your arms again and wanting to be loyal to marley

after finding out where you were from, he’d have so much rage and so many questions

you were a devil, yes, but...were you?

you were so sweet and compassionate and kind...how could you be?

you were the exact opposite of what porco had been taught

you weren’t a devil...marley had lied

they had lied and filled him with all this hatred for people he didn’t even know

it infuriated him, and it saddened him that he couldn’t be with you all because he was brainwashed

for the time that you were apart, porco was a mess

he hardly looked alive anymore, only thinking about you day and day out

he longed for the day he’d see you again

and when he did—

all hell was breaking loose, AGAIN

marley was declaring war on paradis

there were people everywhere, titans ranging about, eren being...eren

you of course were on the front lies, just trying to survive when you suddenly spotted him

could it be? no...

you didn’t wanna believe it at first

you couldn’t

you only stared at porco’s scrunched up face in shock, not moving despite that being incredibly dangerous

likewise, porco was shocked to see you there, alive and once again fighting for paradis

it felt just like the first time, but this time you both had months to prepare your words

and the first thing you said to each other?

“i’m sorry.”

the words shocked both you and porco even further, but it felt...right

“y/n...i’m so sorry i—”

“please, pock i should be the one to apologize. i lied, i know i did. but i—”

“i lied too. we both did. guess that’s why we were made for each other,” porco chuckled humorously, you nodding in agreement

for a moment, you both just stood there looking at each other

but then, months of tension boiled over and finally you just kissed, in the middle of the battlefield

“uh, guys? that’s romantic and all but FUCKING FOCUS WILL YOU?”

porco promises he’ll find you after the battle

and what do you know, he keeps his promise and after that you guys live happily ever after the manga doesn’t exist

[hansols-yoda-boxers]

Camp North Star - June 25th

AFAB!Reader x Jeon Wonwoo x Xu Minghao x Kwon Soonyoung x Choi Seungcheol

Word Count: 8979

Contents: drinking and being inebriated, swearing, your boss walks in, fivesome oral (giving and receiving), handjobs, face fucking, rimming, dom!Seungcheol, somewhat dom!Wonwoo and dom!Minghao, sub!reader, Soonyoung is a needy sub and also a bottom, fingering, nipple play, teasing, slight begging, protected sex, slight choking, drooling

Note: Mayhaps you voted for this hehe this was so much work oh my god it took so long oh my god i hope you appreiacte this filth if you dont so help me please enjoy this fivesomes are difficult skdhakshdas

“Never have I ever…” Minghao trailed off, swirling his beer in his hand as if it were a glass of wine. “Sucked anyone off.”

“Ahh that’s too general,” you laughed, taking a swig of your beer. Soonyoung quickly took a sip of his but not so quickly that you didn’t notice.

“I am learning so many things about you tonight, Kwon Soonyoung,” You said.

“There are so many things to learn,” He giggled.

“I already know too many,” Minghao deadpanned. The three of you laughed. The sound of footsteps came over the din of the crowd around the nearby campfire. You looked up to see Wonwoo wandering near and you beckoned him over to join you.

“Hey, what are you doing?” He asked quietly, taking a seat close to you.

“Never Have I Ever!” Soonyoung proclaimed boldly, making Wonwoo jump a little. You snickered, patting his arm.

“Soonyoung, it’s your turn.” You said.

“Hmmmmm,” He hummed into his beer bottle. “Never have I ever… had sex in a canoe.” He looked at you pointedly.

“Why do you think I have?!” You cried.

“Why wouldn’t you, it's fun if you don’t fall in.”

“Did-” Wonwoo started. “Did you- Which canoe did you have sex in?”

Soonyoung didn’t answer, merely sipping on his drink with an overly innocent look on his face.

“Soonyoung!” You cried. 

“I hoped you cleaned it,” Wonwoo mumbled.

“Wonwoo, you should go next,” Minghao said.

“Alright,” He settled back, resting on his hand, still eyeing Soonyoung suspiciously. “Never have I ever given a handjob in the woods.”

“Oh that’s just mean,” You muttered as you took a sip.

“When was that?” Minghao questioned.

“Who was it with?” Soonyoung asked.

“Some stories I keep to myself,” You said, shooting Wonwoo a glare. “Moving right along. Never have I ever had sex in the pool.”

Minghao quietly took a sip and before any of you could speak he raised a hand.

“I’m not telling you. Though I will say I’m not looking to repeat the experience any time soon. Some things are better left in the imagination.”

“I need more goss,” Soonyoung whined. “This game is for goss. Someone needs to add something risky.”

“You’re so impatient,” Minghao chuckled. “Alright, never have I ever had sex in someone’s office.”

“Does it count,” You asked, already knowing the answer was yes, “if it was with the owner of the office, not like sneaking into someone else’s office?”

“Yes, drink,” said Wonwoo.

“Now I’m curious,” Minghao eyed you.

“Really cuz that just gave me an idea,” Soonyoung said giddily.

“What? Office sex?” You laughed.

“Sneaking into someone’s office to have sex,” he grinned.

“That sounds like a dumb idea,” Minghao said.

“Now hold on,” You said. “Which office would you propose?”

“You’re not actually considering this, are you?” Wonwoo asked.

“I mean if you don’t wanna be invited you don’t have to come,” You grinned.

“I’m thinking a nice big office when I know for a fact that it’s owner is relaxing for once and not working.”

“You’re not about to break into the programming office,” Minghao said.

“Nice big desk, comfy chairs,” Soonyoung said.

“That would make for some nice goss, what a wonderful commodity.” You chimed.

“I mean, it might actually be the best place for it,” Wonwoo said.

You all looked at him.

“What does that mean?” you questioned, watching his face flush more and more red. 

“It- uh- if you go, I’ll show you what I mean.” He finally settled on.

“Can we?” Soonyoung chirped excitedly.

“Why the fuck not?” You said.

Soonyoung grabbed Minghao’s hand, even more giddy in his slightly tipsy state. “You have to come too.”

“Wh-Why do you want me?”

“I don’t know if Wonwoo’s going to stay and they don’t have a dick.” He said, jerking his head towards you. His bluntness made you laugh. You truly were learning a lot about Soonyoung tonight.

“I didn’t know you were a bottom but I don’t think I needed to know that,” Wonwoo mumbled.

“Minghao, please,” Soonyoung begged.

“I- I’ll join you for the walk over, but no promises,” He said. Soonyoung happily clung to him as you all got to your feet, heading for the programming office. Soonyoung skipped ahead with Minghao and you fell back beside Wonwoo.

“Why would Seungcheol’s office be such a good place for sex?” You asked.

“You’ll see, there’s something there you’ll find useful.”

“Are you going to stay?” There was a quiet moment between you as he seemed to think it over. It was much quieter here, away from the bonfire and the rest of the staff.

“I might. I’ve never done anything like this so…”

“Well if you do, I’m looking forward to it,” you smiled. Wonwoo gave a nervous chuckle, cheeks flushing pink.

“Thanks,” he mumbled almost shyly as you approached the office cabin.

“Is it going to be locked?” Minghao asked.

“We’ll just break in,” Soonyoung shrugged.

“Okay we won’t do that,” Wonwoo said. “He usually doesn’t need to lock it during the day so maybe? He might not have locked up yet. Let’s just try the door first and see what happens.”

Minghao and Soonyoung reached the door first. Minghao reached out his hand and turned the handle slowly. The door creaked in a bit and he carefully pushed it fully open. You all knew Seungcheol was down on the bonfire but there was still something a little scary and very thrilling about being here.

You had been in his office once or twice before but never for long. It was it’s own building near the other office buildings, a small cabin but more than enough space. The back wall was lined with bookshelves stuffed with books, safety manuals, and documents. A standing lamp was on along the back wall, bathing the room in a warm light. An old, comfy couch sat along the side of the room under the window and in the center was a large desk, much bigger than Hongseok’s. Seungcheol’s spinning chair sat on the far side and two chairs sat on the closer side for small meetings. Despite how busy he was his desk was relatively clean, only his laptop and a small stack of papers sat on it, everything else neatly tucked away.

You slipped your shoes off on the mat along with the others, wandering into the room.

“Is he coming back?” Minghao questioned, eyeing the light.

“He was drinking down on the beach,” Wonwoo mused. “He can’t be planning to work more after that, can he?”

“He wouldn’t,” you said. “Maybe he forgot to turn it off.”

“I’m unconvinced,” Minghao said.

“Come on,” Soonyoung whined. “We’re here. Let’s have fun anyway. He’s not here now and he can’t be planning to work soon, right? Besides, the thrill of it is that we might get caught.”

“Getting caught by the boss,” You said, running your fingers lightly up Wonwoo’s arm. “That’s kinda a hot idea, isn’t it?”

“I-I- I mean-” His cheeks flushed pink. “Kind of, yeah.”

“This has got to be against so many rules,” Minghao said.

“You knew that before coming over here,” you pointed out, wandering towards the desk with Wonwoo in tow. Soonyoung linked his fingers with Minghao’s slowly pulling him closer to the desk, grinning giddily when Minghao followed him.

“I’m sure there’s some rule about sleeping with your supervisor,” His tone was a little lighter, more joking.

“Does it change anything if you’re the one in charge?” Soonyoung purred, backing up against the edge of the desk and pushing the chair aside.

“I’m thinking about it,” Minghao hummed.

“Wonwoo,” You looked at him quickly. “Didn’t you say this was a great place for sex? Why?”

“O-Oh yeah,” he hurried around the desk, face still flushed. You watched as he pulled open drawers, looking for something. You couldn't quite tell if he was planning to stay yet. Was he excited? Or nervous? Or overwhelmed by the idea? Maybe all three? You weren’t sure if you were bad at reading him or if you were just a little too tipsy to easily figure it out.

“Here,” he said. “In here.”

You all wandered curiously around the desk and let out a collective gasp when you peered in the drawer.

Apparently, the condom stash was hidden in Seungcheol’s office all along. The drawer had quite a few boxes of different kinds of condoms. Not only that but a number of different types of lube sat in the drawer as well, even a few packs of dental dams and some gloves laid in the drawer.

“So this is where the condoms came from,” you mumbled.

“Why does he have all this stuff?” Minghao wondered.

“Who cares?!” Soonyoung said gleefully, grabbing lube and condoms. “This has everything we need!”

You met Wonwoo’s gaze. “You really weren’t kidding, huh?”

“It does have everything we need,” he said.

A grin tugged at your lips. “So you’re staying?”

He looked between the three of you. “Might as well have some fun, right?” He giggled, still sounding a little nervous.

Soonyoung grabbed onto Minghao’s hand, giving him starry eyes. “Will you stay too, please?”

Minghao’s lips twitched into a grin. “I have to admit, I kind of want to hear more of your begging.”

Soonyoung bounced on his toes as he pulled Minghao back around the desk, moving the stack of papers aside. You watched Wonwoo grab the laptop and move it aside while you pushed the chair out of the way. 

Soonyoung was quick to grab the front of Minghao’s shirt and pull him close to make out. Minghao seemed only caught off guard for a moment before he relaxed into the kisses, letting his eyes slide closed and pressing Soonyoung’s hips back against the edge of the desk.

You leaned back on the desk yourself before locking eyes with Wonwoo. He blushed and looked down, stepping a bit closer. His eyes flickered to your lips and then to your eyes and you felt heat rise into your cheeks. Quickly you swooped in, pressing kisses to his neck and feeling his hands on your hips as he let out a quiet sigh.

“No hickeys,” he mumbled.

“What if they’re where no one will see them?” You teased.

“Th-That would be okay,” he replied.

You heard ruffling beside you and peeked over to see Minghao pulling off Soonyoung’s shirt between Soonyoung’s kisses which already looked to be getting desperate. You let your own fingertips trail down over Wonwoo’s chest before playing with the hem of his shirt.

“Can I take this off?” You asked. Wonwoo gave you a quick nod and you helped him pull off his shirt before trailing your lips down his neck and along his collarbone. He let out a sigh as you sucked at his skin but it got lost in the low moan that Minghao let out next to you.

Soonyoung’s lips were on his neck and his hand had slipped between their bodies, already palming Minghao through his shorts.

You followed suit, listening to the shaky breath and feeling Wonwoo grab and squeeze your hips in response as you started touching him. He pressed his hips subtly into your hand, relaxing a little between the sucking of your lips on his skin and your hand slowly working him up.

Both Minghao and Wonwoo let out quiet, low moans as you and Soonyoung worked them up. You couldn’t speak for Soonyoung but every little sound they let out, and every squeeze of Wonwoo’s hands on your hips, sent a rush of arousal down your spine. Each second you were growing more and more turned on and excited.

“You’re eager to use that mouth, aren’t you?” You heard Minghao murmur. You looked over in time to see his hand on Soonyoung’s head, slowly pushing him down to his knees with a smirk. You locked eyes with Wonwoo and felt heat rush up into your face, the blush on Wonwoo’s cheeks told you he felt just as hot at the prospect of doing the same.

You left his chest with one more kiss before sinking to your knees, not making eye contact and instead focusing on undoing his belt slowly. Soonyoung seemed to be moving fast, already having freed Minghao’s cock from his shorts and trailing his lips along it. You took your time, only stopped when Wonwoo tugged at your shirt to pull it off.

You pulled his cock free, wrapping your hand around it and biting down on your lip. Had it seemed the same size when you were giving him a handjob, did it only seem bigger because it was right in front of your face? Or because you could take it further tonight? Or simply because you were horny?

“What the hell are you doing?!”

All four of you froze at the sound of Seungcheol’s voice.

Your eyes darted to look at Soonyoung. His face had flushed red and you could see the wheels turning in his head as he tried to come up with something. You yourself may have been buzzed but you certainly weren’t drunk enough for this. Still, was letting a horny, tipsy Soonyoung handle it the best idea?

“H-Hi Seungcheol,” why you were aiming for a lighthearted tone as you peeked around Wonwoo, his cock still in your hand, you didn’t know. Seungcheol looked less than impressed.

“Why, are you and Soonyoung, giving blowjobs, in my office?” He asked. His voice was far too even for your liking.

“It- uh…” You had nothing.

“It was a group effort,” Minghao sighed.

“That much is clear,” Seungcheol replied.

“We didn’t think you’d be back tonight,” Soonyoung said with a nervous giggle.

“You didn’t notice the light on?”

“It somehow slipped past us?” You offered.

Seungcheol looked between the four of you before he sighed. “There is nothing in the handbook for disciplinary action when 4 of your employees have sex in your office.”

“You’ll have to come up with something,” there was a grin in Soonyoung’s voice and when you looked at him there was mischief in his eyes.

“Yes,” you chimed in. “Be creative. An out of the box solution.”

He narrowed his eyes. “What are you two up to?”

“I just think you should find a… fun solution,” Soonyoung said.

“Yes, this must be stressful, find something to help you relax from that stress.” You added. Wonwoo nudged you hard with his knee, as if to tell you to shut up but it seemed Minghao was on your side. He looked back over his shoulder at Seungcheol.

“The campers show up in two days. And it’s nearly midnight. You’ve finally had a relaxing evening. Do you really want to ruin that?”

“So you think…” Seungcheol was processing your words.

“You should relax,” Minghao shrugged.

“Find something enjoyable,” Wonwoo added quietly, joining in your game.

“Do something fun and out of the box,” You chimed.

“Look,” said Soonyoung. “We’re already on our knees.”

You kept your inhale quiet. The four of you had been dancing around the suggestion but once it was put so blatantly there was no taking it back. You watched Seungcheol’s face as he thought, hand running through his hair as you tried to figure out if you were about to have a fivesome or about to get fired.

“Fuck it,” Seungcheol said, hands falling to his belt as he kicked off his shoes. “I could use this.”

A grin broke out on Soonyoung’s face and it was infectious, spreading to your own. You spared a glance upwards, catching Minghao’s relieved grin and the pink tinge of Wonwoo’s cheeks as you and Soonyoung slide closer to each other.

Seungcheol came closer until he was standing between Wonwoo and Minghao, pants slipping down his hips just enough to let his cock free. Your hand was still wrapped around Wonwoo’s cock and you started to pump him slowly, noticing him relax just a little. Soonyoung’s hand was moving much faster already on Minghao’s cock as his lips started to trail along Seungcheol’s cock.

You leaned in as well, pressing kisses along the other side of Seungcheol’s cock and hearing his quiet groan. Soonyoung’s hand was wrapped around the base, holding his cock between the two of you. Seungcheol’s cock started to grow harder between your lips as the two of you teased him. Your hand kept moving on Wonwoo’s cock, squeezing a little tighter. Your lips drew into a slight smile at the small moan he let out.

Soonyoung slipped underneath, sucking Seungcheol’s balls with his lips as you drew your tongue around the tip, drinking in the groan that fell from his lips. The small sounds all three of them were letting out curled down your spine, arousal settling between your legs and deep in the pit of your stomach.

You felt Seungcheol’s hand on the back of your head, urging you to take more of him into your mouth and you obliged. You started moving your mouth along his cock, taking a little more of him into your mouth each time, trying to keep a steady pace with your hand lest Wonwoo start to feel neglected.

“Just like that,” Seungcheol’s voice was low and a little breathy as he spoke, laced with the heat of arousal. His hips pressed forwards towards you and Soonyoung as you moved your mouths on him, Soonyoung’s movements growing greedier with each passing moment. You found a steady pace in sucking him off, your hand replacing Soonyoung’s at the base of his cock.

“Soonyoung,” Minghao purred, seeming more emboldened now that Seungcheol had spoken. “I want more of your attention.”

Soonyoung obediently shifted. He brought a hand up to play with Seungcheol’s balls as he took Minghao’s cock into his mouth. You looked to the side enough to see the sweet, wide-eyed expression he gave Minghao as he took his cock deep into his throat.

“That feels so good,” Minghao moaned, letting his head fall back. Soonyoung moaned around him and you couldn’t help yourself, moaning around Seungcheol’s cock before moving your mouth more quickly.

“Fuck,” He breathed. His fingers tightened in your hair, guiding you at the speed he wanted. You took him as deep as you could without choking, letting out more moans around his cock and feeling the arousal build even more in your core. Your gaze started to grow heavier but you still looked over to check on Wonwoo as you jerked him off.

He was more relaxed than he had been but still much quieter than you knew him to be. Was he nervous about it? You wanted him to relax fully and enjoy himself and you searched your brain for the things you had done last weekend, trying to remember just what he liked.

You moved your hand a little faster, adding more of a twist to your movement and earned a small moan from his lips, catching sight of his eyes falling closed. He leaned one hand on the back of the chair that you’d pushed to the side to brace himself.

The sound of gagging beside you drew your attention to Soonyoung as he deepthroated Minghao’s cock. You were equal parts jealous and impressed. How did he get so good at that? Maybe you needed to ask him for pointers.

The moans that fell from Minghao’s lips pulled you out of your thoughts very quickly. The sound sent arousal rushing through you and welling in your core. You pressed your thighs together, subtly shifting your hips and moving your hands and mouth a little faster. You let your gaze shift up to look at Seungcheol and it only made your arousal worse.

He was gazing down at you with a heavily lidded, heated expression. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth and as you locked eyes with him he held your head still before thrusting into your mouth. You held it open for him, keeping your eyes on him and moving your hand a little faster on Wonwoo’s cock, thumb teasing his tip here and there, as Seungcheol fucked into your mouth.

Moans were falling from all three of them now, though Wonwoo was still quieter than you knew he could be. Beside you Minghao pulled Soonyoung back off his cock, a string of spit connecting his lips to Minghao’s cock. Minghao’s thighs were trembling slightly as he caught his breath, clearly not wanting to cum too soon.

Soonyoung shifted towards you and you pulled back. Seungcheol’s hand fell away from your head as Soonyoung brought his lips to Seungcheol’s cock. You turned all of your attention to Wonwoo, gazing up at him and meeting his eyes as you took him into your mouth slowly.

Wonwoo let out a shaky breath that was quickly covered by Minghao’s shaky moan as Soonyoung wrapped a hand around his sensitive cock. The sounds rushed through you, making you wetter by the second. Still, you kept your eyes on Wonwoo’s face as you took his cock into your mouth and found a quick pace.

As you brought your other hand to his cock, wrapping them both around, you took in the look of pleasure that overcame his features. His brow furrowed and mouth hung open, moans getting louder as they poured from his lips. A rosy hue was spread across his cheeks, his hair falling in front of his eyes that were scrunched shut.

Seungcheol’s groans had grown louder, as had Soonyoung’s gagging as he took all of Seungcheol’s cock into his mouth. Seungcheol kept a hand in his hair but let him set the movements, his own head falling back as groans and curses came from him.

On his other side Minghao braced himself against a chair, panting and moaning as Soonyoung kept his hand moving on his cock. His fingers curled into the back of the chair and his hips pressed forwards into Soonyoung’s hand, thighs still trembling.

You let out moans around Wonwoo’s cock as you moved faster, getting more desperate. The need in your core was getting unbearable and had you shifting and rocking your hips in search of the sensations you desperately craved. Judging from the few moans Soonyoung got out and how tight his shorts were he wasn’t fairing much better.

You felt Wonwoo’s hand on your head, suddenly pushing you back as he panted. You looked up at him in surprise which melted into smugness when you took in the dazed look on his face, stopping you before he could cum in your mouth.

Next to you Seungcheol dug his hand into Soonyoung’s hair before pulling him back.

“Aren’t you two getting needy?” He asked, his voice rough.

“Yes,” you breathed.

“Did we do a good job?” Soonyoung asked. “I need someone to touch me.”

Seungcheol reached his other hand out, grabbing your chin and holding you so you were both looking at him. You felt your face burning and yet more arousal curling in your coil from the heat of his expression.

“You’ve done well so far,” he said. “Stand up.”

You did as he told you immediately, scrambling to your feet. Very quickly hands were all over you as they pulled off yours and Soonyoung’s clothes. The three of them shifted around. Minghao urged you to sit up on the desk while Seungcheol turned Soonyoung around and bent him over the desk. Wonwoo made his way around to where Soonyoung’s head was and Soonyoung was eager to wrap his lips around Wonwoo’s cock.

Minghao leaned in, giving you a kiss as his hands trailed over your body. You felt the goosebumps in their wake as he trailed fingers over your sensitive skin. He leaned closer, reaching his hands around behind you to undo your bra and you let him pull it off. His hands moved over your chest, drawing a sigh from your lips before they found their way to the hem of your panties.

“Lay back for me,” he murmured against your lips.

You did as he said, letting your head fall to the side to look at Soonyoung. He had a sweet, hazy look in his eyes as Wonwoo slowly thrust into his mouth, letting out quiet moans as he did so. All of Soonyoung’s sounds were muffled but you could still hear his moaning as Seungcheol drew his tongue over his entrance, teasing him. Drool pooled at the edge of Soonyoung’s mouth, his hands splayed out over the desk, already wrapped up in bliss.

A gasp left your lips as Minghao drew his tongue over your sensitive clit. You reached out, grabbing at the edge of the desk and your other hand finding Soonyoung’s wrist. You squeezed at him, not paying much attention to the curious look he gave you as you started to moan, back arching off the desk as Minghao fell into a quick rhythm with his tongue.

“Fuck, that feels good,” you moaned quietly, the sound getting a little lost between the sounds rising up all around you. Wonwoo’s moans, though still quiet, were rushing through your body. Soonyoung’s whiny moans and gags as Wonwoo pushed his cock down Soonyoung’s throat were dizzying.

You felt the curl of the coil, the pleasure that was building inside you, spurred on by the lewd sounds of Minghao eating you out and Seungcheol eating Soonyoung’s ass. Seungcheol let out low groans, hands gripping at Soonyoung’s ass and thighs as his tongue moved quickly. Minghao let smooth moans vibrate through your core, hands holding your thighs open and keeping your hips from bucking into his mouth or grinding too much against his face.

You shifted your gaze up and felt your cunt clenching around nothing as you took in Wonwoo’s face. His brow was furrowed, hips thrusting forwards into Soonyoung’s mouth. Red coloured his cheeks and burned the tips of his ears and his mouth hung open in quiet moans. His eyes were screwed shut and the sight made your head spin.

“F-Fuck,” the curse fell from your lips as Minghao dipped his tongue into your core, curling it into a sensitive spot and sending a tremor through your body. You heard him chuckle at your reaction but you couldn’t quite bring yourself to care, instead pressing your hips closer to him as his tongue ran back up over your clit again.

You squeezed at Soonyoung’s arm, watching his nails slowly scratch at the desk as he pressed his hips back towards Seungcheol. His gaze was heavily lidded, though his eyes opened a little wider as Wonwoo grabbed his hair and jerked his head up roughly, an action that sent even more heat rushing through you. 

He didn’t need to say anything, Soonyoung simply looked up at him, keeping the eye contact as he let Wonwoo fuck his mouth, drooling and moaning. Wonwoo seemed to be relaxing and growing into his confidence tonight.

And you couldn’t deny it looked so good on him.

“Wonwoo,” Seungcheol’s voice called your and Wonwoo’s attention, though Minghao kept his tongue moving through your core. “Why don’t you come back here and help him out? Since he’s been so good to you.”

“Of course,” there was much more surety and calmness to Wonwoo’s voice than there had been when you began.

A moment later you whined as you felt the loss of Minghao’s presence. You propped yourself up on your elbows with a pout as he moved away from your core, but much happier when Seungcheol took his place, smirking at you from where he kneeled on the floor.

You had enough time to catch sight of Wonwoo pouring lube onto his fingers before the feeling of two fingers pushing into your cunt pulled a gasp from your lips. Your eyes locked with Seungcheol’s as you panted and he started to move his fingers.

“You’re already so wet,” he purred.

“You’re welcome,” Minghao chuckled quietly, moving around the side of the desk and kneeling again. You felt his lips start to press kisses along your side.

“I think you could take our cocks right now,” Seungcheol murmured.

They’re teasing was interrupted by the loud, desperate moan that left Soonyoung’s lips, now unhindered, as Wonwoo slipped a long finger inside him.

“Fuck, please,” Soonyoung groaned, dropping his face against the desk as he pressed his hips back, trying to fuck himself on Wonwoo’s fingers. Wonwoo and Seungcheol both chuckled at his neediness and you were distracted by the sensation of Minghao’s plush lips wrapping around one of your nipples.

“You really are needy, aren’t you Soonyoung?” Wonwoo teased.

“Please,” he drooled. “Please fuck me.”

“Don’t rush it,” Seungcheol grinned, as teasing as he was serious. “You need to be properly ready for it.”

Soonyoung’s only response was a groan, resting his cheek against the wood of the desk, facing you. Your own head fell back as Seungcheol started moving his fingers more roughly. He held a hand on your hip to keep it down and you let your eyes fall shut as you took in the sensations.

Soonyoung’s moans rivaled yours, both of you growing louder and louder with little care if anyone would hear you. Soonyoung gripped onto your wrist, trying to find purchase of his own. If his moans were any indication he was getting closer by the second.

You lost yourself more and more in the feeling and sounds. In the sucking of Minghao’s lips and the slow circling of his tongue around your nipple, fingers trailing gently over the skin of your hip and up your side. Seungcheol’s fingers deep in your core, thrusting and curling quickly. The lewd sounds of fingers moving in wetness and your moans filling the hot air.

Pleasure was building inside you quickly, Panting and moaning you felt yourself getting closer to your edge, clenching around Seungcheol’s fingers. Your hips ground as much as he would allow, chasing every little bit of sensation while the focus of cumming took over your mind.

Soonyoung let out a broken moan next to you and you peeked down to see Wonwoo pushing a second finger into his entrance slowly. A tremor ran through his body and his hand squeezed your wrist as he rocked his hips back as much as Wonwoo would allow. 

The sight of him only added to your own arousal, making you clench around Seungcheol’s fingers even more. Soonyoung’s eyes were squeezed shut and his mouth hung open, drool and moans pouring from his lips. His skin shone with a sheen of sweat and his hair fell across his face prettily, moving with each roll of his hips.

“Oh, fuck,” your own eyes squeezed shut as Seungcheol eased a third finger into your core. You took it easily, knowing how wet you were, and feeling the craving for more.

“You’re getting needier too, aren’t you?” Seungcheol chuckled.

You felt Minghao’s lips pull away from your chest, moving up to murmur in your ear. “Is that greedy little cunt of yours ready for some cock?”

Your back arched off the desk and you moaned out loudly as Seungcheol started to draw his tongue over your clit quickly. The only answers you could manage were incoherent whines and moans as the coil in your core curled impossibly tight.

“We’re so far from done with you, yet,” Minghao purred. “You better be ready for more.”

“F-Fuck,” the word came out breathy and high on your voice as Seungcheol’s fingers started pounding into you. Minghao brought his fingers to your chest, playing with your nipples and you only barely registered the way Soonyoung groaned loudly again, no doubt also taking another finger.

Quiet, breathy pleas started to pour from your lips. Seungcheol held your hips down, sucking on your clit roughly and fingering you fast. Minghao’s lips nipped at your ear, hot breath fanning out across your skin.

“I’m so looking forward to sinking my cock into you and fucking you dumb,” Minghao murmured.

You cried out as you came hard, clenching around Seungcheol’s fingers. Your back arched off the desk and your whole body shook. Pleasure washed through every inch of you, stealing your breath. Your hips only stuttered when the sensitivity started to set in. Your hands started to weakly push Seungcheol away from your core as you shook.

Minghao helped you up to sitting, letting you rest your head against his chest as he let his fingers run over your shoulders. Somewhere in your needy haze you’d missed the part where they all rid themselves of their clothes but you weren’t complaining at the sight.

Soonyoung choked out a high moan, body shaking as he came, riding out his high on Wonwoo’s fingers until his hips dropped, knees going weak from the force of his release.

Seungcheol had moved around the desk and was now running his fingers through Soonyoung’s hair. “I hope you’re not done after just a few fingers, Soonyoung,” He teased. Minghao and Wonwoo chuckled and Soonyoung tried and failed to open his eyes, incoherent sounds mumbling out through his lips. 

You slowly caught your breath, thankful for the moment to do so, while Minghao ran his fingers gently over your body. Wonwoo gently smoothed his hands over Soonyoung’s ass and Seungcheol played with his hair, all three of them pumping their own cocks slowly until Soonyoung pushed himself up to stand shakily.

Seungcheol smiled. “Are you two ready for more?” There wasn’t any teasing in his tone this time, only sincerity. You and Soonyoung both nodded, a little tired but eager.

Minghao helped you off the desk and you let him lead you to the chair. He urged you gently to kneel on the chair. You brought your hands to rest on the back of the chair, and then your cheek. Your heart was beating quickly with anticipation as you heard the sounds of condom wrappers ripping open and lube being poured out. You squeezed the back of the chair and wiggled your hips absentmindedly before hearing a chuckle.

You gazed up from your spot to find Seungcheol gazing down at you where you kneeled. His fingers came to your chin gently and tilted your head to look at him properly.

“Are you impatient?” He asked gently.

“Maybe,” you hummed. “Maybe I want a little more.”

“How much more?”

“Maybe I-I-” you stumbled over your words as you felt Minghao’s hands grip your hips and his cock ground against you, moving through your folds and teasing your sensitive clit.

“You lose your words so quickly,” Seungcheol hummed. “He hasn’t even started and you can’t compose yourself.”

You felt heat rush to your face as you tried to find the words you wanted. But they seemed too jumbled on your tongue. The sound of Soonyoung’s moan as Wonwoo eased his cock into his ass drew your attention for a moment before Minghao slowly pushed into you.

A gasp fell from your lips. Your eyes nearly closed as you sunk your hips back towards him but Seungcheol grabbed your jaw firmly and your eyes snapped open instead. You focused your gaze on him as moans started to escape your lips again. Minghao slowly thrust into you, letting out a breathy moan of his own.

“Does it feel good to finally be full?” Seungcheol murmured.

“Mhm,” your whine was high in your voice and you gave your head a little nod. Seungcheol regarded you with a heated smirk, leaning in closer. Your own gaze slipped to his lips as your mouth hung slightly.

“Are you so greedy you want kisses too?” He teased.

“Please,” Did you have a sense of shame left? Decidedly not as you leaned even more forwards, braced on the back of the chair.

Seungcheol chuckled at you but still, he closed the distance between you. His hand stayed on your jaw as he kissed you, pushing his tongue into your mouth which you let inside easily. Your moans came out muffled by his lips, though they were only getting louder.

Minghao kept one hand on your hip, the other slipped up to your chest. You keened forwards into his touch as he started to roll and tug on your nipple roughly. He thrust his hips in a steady pace, each one even and deep and sending a rush of pleasure to your dripping core.

You only got wetter as you took in the sounds of the room. The sounds of your own kisses and muffled, messy moans mixed with the low, breathy groans of Minghao behind you as he fucked you slowly. His sounds hitting your ears and making you clench around him.

Soonyoung and Wonwoo were both growing louder as well. Soonyoung held onto the edge of the desk, chest flush against the hard wood, now hot under his own burning skin. His moans were messy and broken, coming out as gasps and cries with each one of Wonwoo’s thrusts. His hips pressed back for more all the while.

Wonwoo’s sweet moans were finally sounding how you knew they could. The sound made you dizzy, loud and full and punctuated with curses. Complemented the lewd, wet sounds of cocks filling your holes, moving through your wetness, pounding into Soonyoung’s ass. The air in the room only felt hotter and hotter as the moments ticked by.

“F-Fuck,” another curse fell from your lips between kisses as Minghao started fucking into you a little faster. Each movement sent a wave of pleasure through your body and deep in your core the coil was starting to curl in on itself again. Mixed with the sparks of sensation as he played with your nipple roughly.

Seungcheol pulled back, letting you breathe and gasp for air. His own voice came out rough and breathy as he jerked himself off to the sight of you getting fucked.

“You look good like this,” he purred.

“S-So good,” you managed. You heard Minghao’s breathy chuckle from behind you.

“Tell him properly, then,” Seungcheol said.

“It f-feels good,” you moaned, bringing your hips back to Minghao’s and trying to urge him to go faster.

A gasp left your lips as Seungcheol wrapped a hand around your throat, pressing you back against Minghao’s chest and squeezing just a little. A smug smirk hung on his face as he took in your reaction.

“You can do better than that,” he purred.

“Tell me how you feel,” Minghao murmured.

“It f-feels so good,” You stumbled out. “It’s s-so f-f-fucking good. F-Fuck you’re s-so deep. Please. Fuck. P-Please don’t s-stop. I- hnnnn f-f- I n-need this s-s-so bad.”

Minghao’s hips snapped into you harder, making you cry out pitifully. You felt the tremble in your legs, the coil tight in your core and the burning need for touch on your clit, to bring you to your release again. Minghao seemed to be chasing his own high, both hands now on your hips and holding you firmly as he fucked into you and you let your eyes roll back in pleasure.

A bang and a cry of pain called the attention of the three of you, your own eyes snapping open, even if your vision was a little hazy. 

Soonyoung was shaking, gripping onto the table as Wonwoo tried to help him up. His legs had given out and his knees had slammed against the side of the desk.

Seungcheol rushed over quickly to help him up and to sit on the desk. And you only let out a slight whine as Minghao pulled out of you before heading over to check on Soonyoung as well. Soonyoung was no worse for wear, as Seungcheol and Minghao crowded around him he gave them a pout.

“I feel too empty now,” he whined.

“That can be fixed,” You heard Seungcheol say to him as he pushed him gently back to the desk.

You shifted off the chair as Wonwoo came closer, pulled off his condom before rolling on a new one. He came close in front of you, hands landing on your hips.

“Do you need a little something more too?” He asked.

“I could use some more,” you grinned, pulling him to the couch. “I was so close.”

“So was I,” he murmured, sitting sideways on the couch. You climbed over him, straddling his hips and giving him a smile as you lined yourself up with his cock before slowly sinking down onto it.

“Oh fuck,” you breathed. He had to be bigger than you initially thought. His cock had you feeling so wonderfully full. You braced yourself on his shoulders, resting your forehead against his. “You feel so fucking good,” you breathed quietly.

“So do you,” he replied.

Even as Soonyoung started to moan from the desk as Seungcheol thrust into him slow and deep, you stayed still for the moment, enjoying the feeling of your cunt wrapped around Wonwoo’s cock. You let your breath even out, Wonwoo’s hands held your hips and he didn’t urge you to move. You both soaked in the moment, feeling a little as if you were in your own world.

Slowly, with your forehead still resting against Wonwoo’s, you started to grind your hips down. A quiet gasp fell off your lips and Wonwoo chased it with his own, low moan and a squeeze of your hips. The delicious feeling as you slowly moved your hips curled through your core, working you up again.

Wonwoo pressed the tip of his nose against yours as you let your hips move the way they wanted, trying to find the movements that felt the best. You listened to all of Wonwoo’s quiet sounds, now so close to you, some part of your mind wanting to find what he liked best as well.

“Now I’m kind of wondering why we didn’t do this sooner,” he murmured breathily.

“You were the one who wanted nothing to do with my seduction,” you chuckled.

“I’ve seen the light,” he giggled. “I’ve changed my mind. This is good.”

Your words were interrupted by a particularly loud moan from Soonyoung, one that both drew your attention and made you clench around Wonwoo, drawing out a moan of his own. You bit down on your lip as you looked over at Soonyoung. Seungcheol had him on his back on the desk, holding his legs, thighs hugged to his chest. Seungcheol was fucking into him, starting to let ouy moans of his own and Minghao was next to them, kissing Soonyoung’s neck with a hand wrapped around his cock, pumping it quickly.

Just watching the sight had yet another rush of arousal rushing through you and you started riding Wonwoo a little faster, grinding down on his cock more quickly and letting small moans fall from your lips as you met his gaze again.

Wonwoo had pulled his head back a little, he shook his hair back slightly and his gaze was heavily lidded as he regarded you. He was drinking you in as you rode him. You felt heat rushing through your body and to the surface of your skin at the expression he held, the look on his face as his eyes trailed down your chest to where you were taking his cock. Something in his gaze could have made you feel shy if you weren’t already so far gone.

Your eyes trailed to his lips, idly thinking about his last kiss while you started to move your hips a little differently, swirling your hips as you searched for just the right movement and feeling. Your own high was coming back into your brain as the coil inside you curled a little more tightly.

As you swirled your hips you felt Wonwoo’s nails dig into your sides as his head fell back.

“Do that again,” he breathed.

A small smirk tugged at your lips as you obliged, repeating the movement a little faster and trying to fall into a rhythm with it.

Wonwoo's mouth fell open in a series of moans that were growing louder and louder. You felt yourself clench hard around him as you took in the sight. His mouth hung open in a pretty round “o.” His hair fell just a little into his face, some of it stuck in the sheen of sweat over his skin. His eyes were screwed shut, brows furrowed and face twisting with pleasure. His chest heaved with heavy breaths and shuddered as he started to get closer to his own release.

You let your eyes trail down, taking in his toned chest that you were just now paying attention to. You kept one hand on his shoulder, the other trailed down, scratching lightly over the skin of his chest.

Wonwoo keened into your touch with a moan, trembling just a bit from how close he was. Your own edge was getting closer and closer, the coil curled tight again and you started to move faster, chasing after your own high as well.

Your own eyes fell shut and you took in the sensations of Wonwoo’s cock moving in you. Each of the sounds filling the room, Wonwoo’s lovely, loud moans, Soonyoung’s broken desperate cries, and Seungcheol’s low, rough groans, mixed in with yours and nearly made you dizzy, all of it making you more desperate.

You adjusted your legs before lifting yourself up and starting to fuck yourself on Wonwoo’s cock.

“Shit, don’t stop,” he moaned. “Please don’t stop.” His nails dug into your hips, urging you to keep up the quick pace.

“D-Don’t worry about that,” you managed to chuckle through panting and moans. You were too close again to want to stop. You felt yourself clenching around Wonwoo. Lewd sounds filled the space between you as you sunk down on his cock with your dripping cunt over and over. Wonwoo was breathing fast between his moans, his hips messily rocking and bucking up to meet you, making both of you moan and cry out.

Soonyoung let out a particularly needy, beautiful moan that had you clenching, nearly releasing around Wonwoo. 

You heard him cursed quietly under his breath as he wrapped his arms around your waist. He pulled you against his chest and leaned back before bracing his legs and fucking up into you hard.

You let your head fall into his neck as you cried out at the feeling. Your own eyes screwed shut and you dug your nails into his back as you held onto him. His own moans came out unabashed and more desperate as he hips worked, chasing after his high roughly and fucking you dizzy.

Wonwoo let out a choked moan, squeezing you as he came into the condom. He stayed buried deep in you while his hips crashed back to the couch, his body shaking.

You pulled back enough to rest your forehead against his again as he leaned into you. Wonwoo started to catch his breath until you leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.

Wonwoo sat up quickly, looking flustered and you felt heat rust to your face as embarrassment flooded your system, starting to stutter something out before you heard Soonyoung’s cry as he came, cum landing on his lower stomach and legs shaking as he gazed up at Seungcheol and Minghao, the former of which slowly pulled out of him.

You were quick to climb off of Wonwoo’s cock, wobbling your way over to the desk.

“Did you cum yet?” You asked Seungcheol, taking your mind off the awkward moment.

Seungcheol smirked at you. “Not yet. Why don’t you lay back on the desk?”

You did as he said, sparing a glance at Wonwoo who was now resting and catching his breath on the couch. Minghao was sitting into a chair and Soonyoung, who had gotten up, was moving towards him before straddling his lap.

Your attention came back to Seungcheol as he finished putting on a fresh condom and threw your legs up over his shoulders. You bit your lip, grinning up at him and wiggled your hips, eager to cum again and still so close and sensitive. He brought one hand to your hip and the other guided his cock into your heat.

The moan from your lips matched the groan that left his. A slow burn of pleasure ran through you as you stretched out around his cock. He brought his other hand to your hip before leaning down over you a little more, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips and heat in his gaze as he pulled his hips back before rolling into you, nice and deep.

You let out gasps at the feeling, eyelids already heavy and body so sensitive and needy from both Minghao and Wonwoo. You let your thoughts and feelings slip away from you, instead focusing every bit of your energy on the sensation of Seungcheol’s cock thrusting into you, giving you more pleasure with each roll of his hips.

“Don’t close those pretty eyes,” he murmured, bearing down over you. You felt one hand travel up from your hip until he fingers rested against your neck. You forced your eyes open, meeting his gaze properly and giving him moans in response.

“Good job,” he purred.

You gave him a lopsided smile, eyes drinking in his intense gaze and it only added to the fire inside of you. His low groans, Soonyoung and Minghao’s pretty moans from the chair. And Wonwoo’s breath, still slowing after his release. 

Seungcheol wrapped a hand around your throat gently and you whined pitifully for him. But it turned into a loud, broken moan as he pulled his hips back and slammed into you roughly, sending a shock of pleasure through you.

“Do you like that?” He teased, though clearly breathy and getting close himself.

“Fuck y-yes,” you stuttered. “P-Please~”

“You don’t even have to ask,” he grinned before pulling back and doing it again.

His thrusts came harder and soon faster as well. From the slow roll of his hips he was now properly fucking you. You reached out for anything, your hands finding the arm leading to the hand around your throat and you grabbed onto it, trying to keep your eyes locked on his.

Every one of your senses was alight. The sounds and smells around you were utterly dizzying and nearly overwhelming. You felt your thighs trembling as you gazed up at Seungcheol, unable to form anything other than a string of moans as the oh so close coil in your core curled tightly, so close to coming undone.

You tried to reach one of your own hands down between your legs but Seungcheol was faster. He pulled his hand from your neck and pressed his palm against your lower stomach before his thumb started to rub over your clit quickly and roughly.

“F-F-F” you couldn’t even manage one word at the sensation. Your legs started to squeeze together but it only made the feeling more intense. Your nails scratched against the desk and your back arched off the wood, now hot from the skin of your back. Seungcheol chased his high with quick, rough thrusts, rubbing your clit as fast as he could.

Finally your hips bucked up, only kept close enough for him to keep fucking you from his strength as you came hard on his cock. Your eyes rolled back and fingers tried to dug uselessly into the hard wood as spots dotted your vision and a tidal wave of pleasure washed over you. The cry that came from your lips was louder than anything else in the small cabin, nearly a scream as he fucked you through your orgasm.

Even as you came down he didn’t stop. His hand came back to your hip, spurred on by the feeling of your release and you let out broken moans, only barely noticing Minghao doing the same as he came. Whimpers left your lips at the feeling, almost overwhelming you but also feeling so good in your post orgasm haze.

You let out a series of messy moans, feeling drool slipping from the corner of your mouth and eyes unable to open as his hips slammed into you roughly. You were slightly more aware of Soonyoung’s muffled cry into Minghao’s neck as he came for a third time. But your attention came quickly back to Seungcheol as he let out a low growl that even in your state had you clenching around him.

Seungcheol’s hips stuttered to a stop inside you as he spilled his release into the condom. His chest heaved as he panted and there was a slight tremor in his legs as a series of groans fell off his lips until he quieted.

Seungcheol pulled out of you carefully before dropping back into the other chair, catching his breath. Wonwoo stepped next to the desk and gently helped you up to sitting. His hand landed on your back, rubbing it in what you were sure was an absentminded gesture. You leaned against him for support, noticing he had found his boxers and thrown them back on. You gazed around to Soonyoung who was resting against Minghao’s chest, still shaking slightly.

“So,” his voice was clearly tired and yet still mischievous. “When is round 2?”

“Never,” said Seungcheol, even though still breathless he gave Soonyoung a pointed look. “And if any of you tell anyone I’ll fire you.”

“Why are you looking at me?” He whined.

“You’re the gossip,” Minghao chuckled.

“You’re the only one who would blab.” you added.

“You too,” Seungcheol said to you.

“Hey, I’ve kept some secrets. You guys don’t know everything.”

Seungcheol fully relaxed back into his chair. “Good. Soonyoung, since I’m sure this was your idea you get to clean my office tomorrow.”

“I- yeah okay,” he mumbled.

“And if any of you break into my office again and start having sex I will be firing you. Understood?”

A chorus of “yeps” and “yes sirs” rang out around the room.

[lady-literature]

Accidental Crime Boss Marinette

Okay so,, I have this AU in my head, right? (not surprised) and I’m lacking any real direction for it (still not surprised) but it basically goes like this:

Marinette moves to Gotham.

She’s drawn there for whatever reason and the kwami are saying something about balance and being a Guardian and her sacred duty and something but Marinette isn’t really listening. She’s too busy trying to find a shop front where she can open a bakery without having to worry about getting mugged every time she steps outside.

Chloé comes with her, obviously, because they’re friends and Chloé has a business degree she puts to good use actually running Mari’s bakery and online boutique while Mari gets to bake and fuck around basically. Adrien, Luka and Kagami are not there, but that’s mostly because they travel too much to settle down and keeping an empty apartment in Gotham is just asking for trouble.

Kagami is a world-renowned fencer and Luka travels the world for his music company. Not touring, but soaking up cultures and ways of life so he can make soundtracks to movies and tv shows. Providing the background and life to a film is more his style than touring the world ala his father, Jagged Stone.

Adrien is having the time of his life being Kagami’s trophy husband. He has no pressing responsibilities he doesn’t take on for himself and he gets to fuck with the world’s elite with little to no consequences. He spends most of his days donating far too much money to charities and orphanages and then causing minor scandals that land him on the cover of magazines.

He has much the same kind of ‘dumbass with a heart of gold’ persona to the media as Bruce Wayne does, only without the playboy bits.

(There is a wall in the back of the bakery, where Chloé and Mari carefully cut out and frame every headline and ridiculous picture Adrien has. He is very much delighted when he learns about his ‘wall of fame’.)

Anyway, Marinette finds herself with a bakery not overly far from crime alley, much to Chloé’s chagrin.

(“What do you mean it ‘just felt right’?! I swear to kwami, DC, you’re going to get us robbed and sold into slavery.”)

They do not get sold into salvery.

In fact, despite their less than stellar choice of locale, they do pretty well for themselves. The only problems they have (according to Chloé) is the army of children Marinette accidentally attracted.

When asked, Marinette tells everyone that it was an accident. Meanwhile, Chloé, standing behind her, will shake her head and insist there was literally never any other option for them the moment that first kid came in looking to nab some cash and a few pastries.

Mari lives by the phrases, ‘kindness breeds more kindness’ and ‘do unto others’ and all that other nice person shit. Chloé just lets Mari pseudo-adopt her strays and makes sure that they don’t steal anything too important in the time it takes her to gain their loyalty.

The kwami stay staunchly out of any arguments involving the kids (and eventually the homeless all along their street and every working girl in a five-block radius). They do so with a special brand of amusement that never means good things for either of them. (After all, the last time the kwami looked that amused, they moved to Gotham.)

The first kid is named Serrure, as Marinette comes to learn over the next month after he returns again and again, getting closer and closer like a feral cat. Other kids come during that time, all of them too small and too thin and too guarded for Mari's tastes. She wants to wrap them all up and tuck them into bed but she can’t. She has to be patient, has to be gentle. These kids are just as likely to bite her hand as they are to accept help.

Serrure becomes an almost permanent fixture at the bakery after that first month. Mari’s not quite sure what she did to get through to him, but she did, she supposes. He can’t be much older than eleven and looks nine, but after getting settled, she and Chloé discover this little slip of a boy is just as mischievous as Trixx and has all the dramatics of their favorite black cat.

The kwami, when talking about him, only refer to Serrure as Loki, even after Marinette scolds them for it. She eventually gives up trying to correct them, it’s not like Serrure talks to them anyway(yet)((that she knows of)).

There’s an apartment above the bakery, which is where Chloé and Mari and all her strays that grow to trust her enough live. It’s three bedrooms, and at first, Mari just buys as many bunk beds as she can fit into the spare room and calls it a day. The kids feel safe in her home, which isn’t too surprising. Everyone thinks the bakery feels safe, feels like home or comfort or whatever else eases their minds.

And Marinette should hopes so. She certainly put enough time and effort and magic and energy into the wards around this place for that to happen. To protect her and the children and all her strays that no one else will help.

But, she eventually amasses too many kids to fit into the one room. Chloé throws a fit about having to share with Mari again—“I had enough of that in university thank you very much”—but she relinquishes easily enough.

Mari buys more bunk beds, and Serrure has taken to sneaking into her room to curl up in her bed anyway, and sometimes the smaller kids who have nightmares will come in and pile on as well.

(There are only a few that Chloé will allow to do the same with her. It is considered a high honor and breeds a playful kind of jealousy that Chloé finds amusing. Mari scolds her for pitting the kids against each other.)

That only lasts them another two months.

“This is getting ridiculous,” Chloé tells her one day before the kids wake up. Mari is at the stove, cooking and baking for a small army while Chloé balances the books. “There’s not enough room for us all, DC, and the only reason someone hasn’t come barrelling down on us about the abundance of children is by the grace of your absurd amount of luck.”

“Well I can’t just kick them out, Queenie! What do you want from me?”

“Either we need to buy more real estate in this city—which I’d rather not do—or you open up the grimoire and start building pocket dimensions. I know you can. I’ve read the chapter.”

Marinette looks at her. “That is such a bad idea.”

They do the idea.

And then Mari adds about a thousand more wards to the bakery, carved into the wood and counter and anything that’s a permanent fixture. Doorways become particularly ward heavy, what with them being the entrances and exits to the hidden realms and children’s’ rooms.

The apartment above the bakery isn’t quite infinite but it gets pretty damn close some days.

This also means, of course, that all the kids definitely know about magic now. Some of them—Serrure—have known about it for a while she knows, but it’s different now. The kwami followed her around most of the time and she doesn’t keep them trapped in the Miracle Box like Fu did, but now that the kids know, they don’t bother staying hidden.

The children, at least, love them and the kwami adore them with all the ferocity a god can give. After Chloé gets over her ‘ew children’ phase, she throws herself into their education (on top of actually running the businesses Mari keeps, mind you). She has the help of the kwami, who act as personal tutors to the children, and it’s not long before the kids start to joke about her being the Principal.

(Some tried to call her Warden, but that joke didn’t last long.)

Marinette has also been telling the kids bedtime stories ever since this started. Old stories of the Guardian and Chosens who fought back the darkness, she shares all she knows of the Orders history with these kids and it’s not until Wayzz points it out to her does she realize what she’s doing.

“Ladybugs are known for renewal. It is no surprise that you are rebuilding what was lost.”

Rebuilding the Order using children was certainly not her intention but, well. She supposes there’s no place safer for her kids than what is shaping up to be the new Miracle Temple. It’s the only haven where they can learn to harness their Gifts and powers, it’s the only place where they can be surrounded by others like them without being thrust into superhero-dom.

Context: about a month into this whole circus, Marinette had realized there was a significant—almost all of them really—amount of metas and Gifted in her little hoard of strays. Which is… odd. Especially with how few metas there are in Gotham.

She had asked the kwami about it, and they have that amused look again. “You are their guardian.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re their guardian. True, you are the Guardian of us, of the ancient ways, but you are a guardian at your soul too. You protect what is yours, and they are yours whether you realise it or not. The children can sense that, so they flock to you.”

And, huh. She supposes that makes sense but that’s also really kind of strange and weird and she doesn't want to think about that anymore actually.

So things are… fine, Marinette supposes. The bakery is doing well, and she has about two dozen-plus helpers running around underfoot to help tend to the customers or run to the store or help in the back with the baking. And every kid of hers has new clothes, their street things thrown out for being too ragged and replaced with something fresh made by Marinette’s own hands.

She embroiders little fairy wings into the clothes normally, because that’s what her cloaked wards look like most times and the kids like it and its technically the logo for the bakery and there’s a million reasons she does it.

It is, perhaps, her first mistake.

(“It was certainly not your first,” Chloé will snark one dayin the future.)

Because now Marinette has an army of magical children learning to wield their powers and not fear them and they’re all wearing what can be considered her insignia and uh oh, it looks a lot like Mari is some sort of up and coming mob boss who uses kids and prostitutes and the homeless as runners. People on the street start calling her the Pixie, start referring to Chloé—her second in all things just as Chat had been her equal—as Wasp, as Yellowjacket, as the Unseelie.

(They cannot seem to pick a name for her, but Pixie is all but engraved in stone. Mari is not sure who coined it, and she doesn't think she wants to know.)

The first time the whole situation is brought to her attention, she punches the idiot who dared even imply such a thing so hard she knocks him out.

Because look. The kids are hers right? And she watches out for the people near her, makes sure the working girls are treated as well as they can be and offers the homeless extra food and a dry place to wait out the storm. She offers her hand and gives them all a place to rest, to eat, to exist without expectations or consequences.

She does that because she’s kind, because it hurts her to see people in need, to see them suffer, not because she’s hoping to gain something from it.

The fact that most of them repay her in gossip or information or bend her ear about the newest goings on in the corrupt elite or filthy underworld is strange, yes, but it’s nice to know what’s going on in the city, she supposes. And one time, Kathy, who works on the corner of Brookes and Gilmore, warned her of a drug raid that saved her an unnecessary trip to the police station so it’s not like it doesn't have it’s uses.

But mostly, Mari doesn't really think about all the information that’s unintentionally or otherwise passed onto her. She remembers it all, because it’s rude not to listen when people talk to her, but nothing comes of normally.

Not until Serrure—now twelve and well versed in the magic of illusions and glamors and knows almost as much about this city as her or the Bats—bursts into the bakery one day and grabs Mari away from the front counter right in the middle of a customer ordering. She should, perhaps, be a little angry at that but Tony, one of the older boys and just shy of sixteen, steps into her place almost immediately, so.

And then Serrure speaks and everything is pushed aside in favour of the next words to fall from his lips.

“Someone took Sophie,” he says and she nearly sees red.

After Serrure, Sophie has been here the longest. She is the youngest of them all, only seven, but oh so clever and kind and while she looks nothing like her, everyone calls her Mini-Mari. If Serrure is her beloved first son, Sophie is her treasured daughter.

She’s out the door in the next moment, storming her way to their base. She has Sophie and a handful of extra kids back by sunset, a little frightened, but no worse for wear. She doesn’t make a big deal out of it, besides making sure that the idiots who dared cross her never do so again, but word gets out.

Soon, her kids and teens and adults begin giving her more than just information, they begin giving her problems. Ones she’s meant to fix because she’s Pixie. She’s safety, she’s protection, she’s the one the people start to turn to for help.

And enter stage left, one Jason Todd who’s all snark and charm and smiles wrapped up in a nice leather bow and tall enough that Mari likely could climb him like a tree. If that was something she wanted, she guesses.

(She wants. She just won’t admit.)

He becomes a regular at the bakery and befriends most of her kids.

Mari’s wary when he first takes an interest in them. They’ve been hurt and a lot of them are still adjusting to being safe and it doesn't matter that this man is hot enough to burn, if he steps even a toe out of line with her kids she’ll make him wish he was never even born.

But, she stops worrying eventually. The kwami like him well enough, but seem to think something’s odd about him—but its Gotham, who isn’t strange?—and both Serrure and Sophie take to him like ducks to water and they’re both good judges of character.

There’s a certain intuition they both have that reminds Marinette just a bit too much about herself and pure magic. Not for the first time does she wonder if they got such strong magic from their parents or if it cropped up in them randomly, fostered by fortune and chance and the magic that’s so deeply seeped into the bones of her bakery it’ll be here long after she’s gone.

And, okay, so she was a little right to be wary because Jason was mostly there to investigate her. Far too many people respect her and are loyal to her and she has a veritable orphanage in her pocket and also Harley and Ivy like her and it just- it doesn’t look good right?

But Jason’s a good detective and it doesn't take him long at all to see that Mari is just as sweet and kind and loving as she appears to be. Not long after that, Red Hood declares Pixie and all of hers, under his protection. She, of course, is more than capable of taking care of her and hers, and the underworld knows this, has seen it, but he does it anyway.

The news, of course, gets back to Mari and she is… confused. Why would the Red Hood do something like that? She’s heard talk of him being sweet on kids, but to claim her? They’ve never even met.

Bonus points for Jason being there when she’s told about it. He kind of raises his eyebrow at her because, huh, that was fast, and then spends the next few minutes talking up the Red Hood to her much to her utter bafflement.

He actually keeps doing that too, talking up the Red Hood. Mari thinks he has a crush on the man for the longest time because of it. Until he reveals he is Red Hood, then she just wants to punch his stupidly handsome face for being such an idiot.

Shit happens from there and things go down and the two spend a couple of months dancing around each other and intentionally and unintentionally ruling the criminal underworld and at one point Marinette definitely punches Bruce and Batman in the face—separately, much to Jason’s unending joy—and she also definitely adopts Duke/Signal as well because that poor boy needs to know he’s not alone.

And it’s just them being domestic and badass and lowkey raising an army of children and falling in love while the kwami and the kids and Chloé are all in the background just yelling at them to get together already!

Which, they do. Eventually. After all the secrets come out and Jason knows about the magic and Order and meets Mari’s other friends, ie Kagami, Luka and Adrien who are all intimidating for wildly different reasons. And Mari finds out that Jason died and came back (which earns him the nickname firebird btw) and that he was a Robin once upon a time but is now Red Hood and oh my kwami it all makes sense now.

Jason confesses like three times via classic Victorian romance novel quotes because he’s a fucking literature nerd but it’s not until he basically spells it out for Mari does she really understand. it’s all very sweet and heartwarming and then the pair duck into one of the empty pocket dimensions they have lying around and aren’t seen for three days.

(No one really goes to look for them tbh)

Chloé definitely teases them about early honeymoons and things but besides the two being even more ridiculously lovey-dovey than usual, life goes back to normal. Or as normal as it gets for them. 

And they all live happily ever after the end.

[fwkei]

Time.

Kazutora x fem!reader (angst/fluff)

CW/TW: Mentions of suicide, (slight) mention of starvation.

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR VALHALLA ARC

Note! Explanation of story at end just incase you’re confused also i apologize for mistakes, i did not read this over. 🙆🏻‍♀️

WC: 3.4k

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You sat at the edge of your seat. Watching the clock above your teacher's head ever so closely. 

“When you want to find the common di-” 

Suddenly the bell rang, interrupting your teacher from his final words. 

“Oh my bad, guess I lost track of time, anyways please remember to study for your quiz on Monday! I know it's a weekend, but save some time for academics!” said your teacher as your classmates packed up their stuff to leave. 

Today was Friday, meaning it was the day you get to visit Kazutora at juvie for the first time after Keisuke's death, and your attempt. It was 3:30, and visiting hours started at 4 to 5 every Friday for inmates. Running to the metro takes about 5-7 minutes, and walking from the station to the actual juvie takes about 20 minutes, while the ride lasts up to 10, meaning you should arrive there at around 4:10. And there's no time to waste. 

You ran out of class, ignoring your fellow classmates goodbyes. You held your book bag tight as you ran fast to the Tokyo station. Seeing you arrived just on time you jumped in just before the 3:30 o'clock train leaves to a different side of the district where Kazutora is being held. You held onto the rail beside you to keep yourself steady as the train started to move . 

You felt scared but happy to see Kazutora. He most probably didn't know you would be coming, he probably thought you would at most write letters to him, like before, but again...Kazutora believes that you hate him now. You didn't know what you were going to say to him. Draken told you that he already visited him while you were in psychiatric hold for a bit, and he told you that Kazutora was planning on killing himself. Draken did not specify if he told Kazutora about your own attempt but you didn't worry too much because you were healing, and you now had hope.  

Your heart was racing, as the train came to a stop. As the doors opened you ran, and fast. Dodging people to not hurt them and almost stepping on things you shouldn’t be stepping on. You checked the time to see it was 4:01, and you still had about 10 minutes worth of walking/running to cover. 

You were breathing heavily when the Juvenile building came into view. You checked the time again to see it was 4:11. You jogged to the doors of the building despite the fact that your thighs were burning from the amount of cardio you had just done. 

It's all worth it. 

You thought to yourself opening the doors. 

Kazutora sat on the bed of his bland and colorless cell. He signed as he looked up at the ceiling light before turning his position to look at the side of the wall. He held his pillow tight. He knew it was visiting day, and his heart was anxious despite the fact that others had already been called to see their visitors, and there was still no call for him. He didn't even expect any visitors.

Kazutora didn't know if he wanted to see you or not. He’s spent so much time alone in his cell thinking. He wondered if you had figured out the other reason for him stabbing his best friend, you could read people, but he knew you had a hard time reading him. He felt his heart ache. He was scared of the karma that would hit him because of it. Maybe not even Karma, but just some sort of punishment, for causing pain to the soul that cared for him so much, and for not being there for that soul when she needed it the most. Which... ultimately lead to your attempt, which Draken told him about during his visit. He shut his eyes as he remembered Draken's words. 

“I don’t wanna hear you say there is no point anymore. Because there is, and it’s kinda frustrating and irritating how you can’t see it even though it’s right there. She’s in psychiatric hold right now because she was close to ending her own life. After Baji died, and you were taken away, Y/n couldn't take it anymore, and no one could see it because she just...she just kept it in, like you do. She was going to die on Baji’s birthday if I wasn’t there to make her throw up the pills she took. Her and I may not be blood related siblings, but I know she’s been through a lot and has always gotten over it just fine, you know that...but this time...I got really fucking scared.”

Kazutora felt his heart drop to fucking hell at Draken’s words. He felt his breathing stop as his mouth parted.

“I know you love her, I'm not sure in what way but I could care less about that. I know, Kazutora. All those times you came crying to the brothel, crying into her arms, begging for some type of help and she helped you, lended you her body for you to cry on, I’d hear all of it. I know you’re hurting, but if you go, I don't think she will be able to live with herself. She’ll blame herself for not being there for you like she’s always been. Do you understand?”

He felt his body throb from literal physical pain. Kazutora was feeling and getting the punishment he deserved right then and there. 

“You owe it to her, whether you like it or not, to stay alive because she's doing the same for you. And once you’re out of here, you should finally grow up. Let her cry into your arms for once. She’s your best friend, right? Because she deserves for those efforts to be reciprocated. And you deserve to see what she’s gone through because of everything that happened. Take care, Kazutora.” 

Kazutora was lost in his own mind, to the point where he couldn't even register that one of the guards was calling his name from the cell door.

“Hm? I’m sorry I wasn't...uh, paying attention. What did you say?” he asked sitting up nervously 

“You got a visitor, kid. C’mon get up.” said the man unlocking his cell 

“A- visitor?” he said quietly getting up from his bed with shocked eyes 

It was already 4:15. Kazutora grew anxious at who his visitor could be. He was sure it wasn't you, your school is too far for you to make it here in time. There would only be a couple minutes to spare if you did try. Could it be Draken wanting to give him a word of advice? Or maybe Chifuyu.. Maybe Mikey? God, who could it be. It made him feel even more congested and trapped than before.  

As Kazutora walked, he looked down at his feet avoiding people's gazes. He saw the backs of his fellow juvenile delinquents from the side of his eye. His heartbeat became stronger, and he felt it thumbing in his ears. God, he didn't know what to expect. He was just so...frustrated. 

“Here, you have until 5.” said the guard, taking off his hand cuffs. His back was facing you. You grew anxious bringing your hands to rest on your things and skirt, waiting for him to turn around and look at you. You watched as he rubbed his wrists and sat down at the stool still not looking at you. You rubbed your hands together under the table separating you both, as the guard walked away to patrol. Your eyes followed the guard, not even noticing that Kazutora had turned to look at your face. 

Kazutora felt his face get hot at the sight of you. You had a school shirt on, with a dark blue tie and a sweater vest, Your hair tied into a low and messy bun with some of you natural and dyed hairs falling out framing your face. He felt his whole body go warm as you turned your head and gave him a nervous smile as a small blush formed. He didn't know why he was scared to see you, because every time Kazutora had the chance to see you, he instantly felt better, no matter what.

You two, and the other inmates and visitors, were all separated by a piece of plastic with a vent to capture sound better. On the side there was a subsection with an opening to the other side where you could pass things through. Such as notes, toys, hygiene stuff, and extra. You brought your hands to the table holding them.

“Hey...sorry I’m late.” you said as you saw Kazutora snap out of his gaze 

“Oh no I-, please don’t be..” he said waving his hands frantically, clearly nervous

“I had to run about 2 miles to get here..” you laughed trying to not tense up

Kazutora felt… stupid, why would you do that? Just to see him? It just made him even more confused...confused about how he felt towards you. 

“Just to see me? But..why?” he asked without thinking and just speaking, giving a regretful and embarrassed face after asking his question.

“Hm? Oh well it's simple really…” you said bringing your hands to rest in between your thighs on your seat 

“I know that I've told you that I don't like saying these words to people because it sounds like some sort of goodbye but it’s time I grow up from my past, and stop keeping things in..so…it’s because I love you... I thought that was fairly obvious but I don't wanna mess up like I did last time. I want you to know that I do love you and care for you.” you said giving him a closed eyed smile, this made Kazutora realize that you deeply regretted not telling Keisuke that you loved him more often when you two still had time. He felt his heart ache. He felt so guilty and gross.

“So, I’m gonna try and start saying that more often..” you said laughing to break the silence 

Kazutora was still speechless at what you had just said. He couldn’t seem to process it, and he wanted to say it back but for some reason he just couldn’t. He was afraid that something else might slip out. He truly didn't think he was worthy of your love and care. It became quiet. Again.

“I made you a bento box with your favorite things, I made sure to put some extra meat. Cause you always used to ask for that when I would make bentos for study days with you and Keisuke. And don’t worry! It’s allowed and you can have the kitchen hold it for you till you’re ready to eat it for today's dinner, the guards said so. And the container is microwave safe! So you can warm up the entree section. There’s rice and BBQ meat, little octopus shaped sausages and sauce with it! Oh and a salad with sesame dressing on the side, and desert which is just mochi. Every Friday I'll come by, and give you the new bento and you'll just give me back the old one, so that I can wash it and so we don't have to waste stuff.” you said smiling 

Your hand dung into your bag, and you pulled out a wooden bento box sliding it halfway through the subsection, but Kazutora hung his head low. You smiled, trying your best to make things right, as silence grew loud again. 

“I can also bring some mangas for you, I know you like shounen and also horror.. So I can buy some and give them to you so that you aren't bored! This week's shonen jump is good… It’s about a boy who is trying to save his mom, and ends up traveling across lands, with close friends, to get this special potion that will heal her, but I’ll make sure to look for some good horror manga too...I know you like stuff about folk tales, that sound okay?”  

Silence.

After a few minutes you spoke again.

“I decided to let my hair grow out cause I kinda miss having longer hair…There's this really pretty girl in my class who has long blonde hair.. Like Emma’s but longer and more wavy.. What about you? Anything you wanna do to your hair when you get out? I’ll take you to get it done-” 

Silence. 

The time now at 4:40. Kazutora bit his lip out of frustration, refusing to look up at you. 

“Oh! What about I bring over a sudoku book, so you can work on your academics as well! I can teach you how to play, it’s fun once you get the hang of it. Or I can bring just a simple literature book, it’s really up to you, I think both are great.” 

Silence. 

“Maybe markers so you can draw on yourself when you’re bored? I remember you doing that while I would tutor you and Keisuke. I can get big and small ones, and ones with different colors too. Also a sketch book, since you’re really good at drawing.” 

You were met with silence again. You felt your heart ache. Your eyes looked up at the clock and saw it was 4:47. You both were running out of time. About half an hour went by of your speaking, you giving a couple minutes in between waiting for him to speak back, but nothing. You clenched your hands into fists, biting your bottom lip as you looked down at your hands, resting on your thighs. 

You felt a strong feeling in your throat, the feeling you get when you’re about to sob. You were so frustrated, and you were trying to keep a level head. It was hard and you just wanted to fucking cry. 

“I- '' you said before closing your mouth realizing you were about to let out a whine. You didn't wanna cry, you wanted to say something but you were afraid that if you did, it would just come out as a sob.  

“I know it’s hard on you-” you said holding back your sobs while still looking down at your hands, letting your hairs cover your face 

“If you don’t want me here, I promise- that I’m fine with that...but~” you said in between pauses keeping your sobs in, but your last word came out shaky making Kazutora shoot his head to see you about to cry. 

He felt his heart ache once again. 

 “But please….jus-just say something. Anything. At least acknowledge that I'm here.” you cried quietly while tensing up your shoulders 

Kazutora frowned. This was his punishment. Seeing you cry, and not being able to hold and comfort you like he desperately wanted to. He opened his mouth, but closed it soon after when nothing came out. Not even a squeak, or whine, or breath. 

“I-”

You heard him say. You looked up with tears in your eyes seeing his face of desperation. 

Kazutora wanted to speak so badly, there were so many thoughts in his head he just could not push one out of his mouth, and he was afraid he might say something he would regret. He wanted to respond to everything you asked him, add commentary, tell you that you looked pretty today, say thank you for the food you made him. Tell you to not waste your tears on someone like him. Say sorry for making you feel uncomfortable because of his silence. God he just- 

“I love you-” he choked up and said in a louder tone causing your eyes to widen and mouth to part from shock at his sudden outburst.

He was avoiding your eyes as he spoke. 

“I- thank you, thank you so much for the food! Really! And I would really love whatever and everything you bring me.” he said, quieting down towards the end.  

“I...can’t put my thoughts into words… and I don’t wanna say something I’d regret. All this time I’ve just been lost in my own mind. I just want you to know that..that I really am in- that I really appreciate you. I want you..to be here, and I’m so...sorry for making you cry.” he said in between pauses of frustration and embarrassment 

You felt your body get warm, your heart beat was strong and you could feel it in your finger tips and temples. You opened your mouth to say something before Kazutora spoke again. 

“I..wanted to.. Wanted to help you...in just some way...after seeing you cry for the first time...with Baji in your arms….I shouldn't have stabbed Baji...I took the person you loved more than anything...away from you.. Because I was j- because I was so stupid, and still am. Even when you’ve done...so fucking much for me...I- and I took him from you...I just don’t get it… how can you have any empathy towards me anymore.. It doesn't make sense. I took so much from you… I killed Shinchiro, and I killed Baji. You loved them both...Mikey loved them both, why do..why do you even have any feeling towards me?” he said looking into your eyes with tears   

Your eyes softened at him. You took a small breath before saying-

“I thought I already told you why, Kazutora. I love you.” 

Kazutora felt a tear run down his cheek. He knew how much thought came behind those simple words. 

“I don’t need a reason to love you. Just like I don't need a reason to be hungry. It’s just there, and will continue to be there, you know what I mean? Same thing with everyone I love.” you said 

His breath hitched. The time now at 4:52.

“The only difference is I was in love with Keisuke. I still am in love with him. Even though he’s not here anymore. I know you might think I love him and Shinchiro and Mikey because they saved my life and helped me. But I was only so little. I had no concept of it. So was Keisuke. So was Mikey. Keisuke had no reason to come up to little me while I was starving on the ground practically dying. He just did it. He was too young to understand love. You think he understood his feelings for me the second he saw me? Or even with Mikey or Shinchiro. Of course not. They were just focussed on saving my life at the time. We discovered the love that was involved later. Even if it was too late to say anything about it. It took Kei and I about...hmmm..5-7 years maybe...to understand what we felt toward each other specifically. It is different with everyone. The love is just there, it’ll just be understood when the time is right. Like when your hunger just hits you. So when you ask me why I love you, or care for you, or forgive you. I just can’t give you a simple answer, even if I wanted to….because there's so much. Too much.” 

Kazutora understood your words. He really did. It made so much sense to him and he just wanted to scream.

Why? Well.. 

“The time will come where you believe that you're worthy of someone else's love and even your own, and even worth loving someone else yourself. So don’t worry. I’ll wait. I’ll wait as long as it takes. Even if it takes all the time in the world, okay?” you said smiling at him leaving him with shocked eyes

“Alright times up! 5 o'clock!” yelled a guard 

“Well, I'll see you next Friday, okay? I’ll bring over some manga, oh! And don't forget the bento!” you said getting up from your seat as Kazutora did the same keeping his hands on the table as the guard came to cuff them 

“Y/n I-I’m…”

No. He can’t say it. He can never ever say it. Why? And say what? 

Because he will never be him. He can never be like him for you, and he was perfect for you. He was the one there for you. He had the time to love you. He was the one. He could never even compete. Not after what he did. Not after the jealousy and envy grew and brewed inside him towards him. He is filthy. Not worthy of your love. Right? 

But someday, he desperately and genuinely wants to allow himself to be loved, and to love. Kazutora will forever be longing for that moment. And when he can love, and allow himself to be loved, he wants it to be with you. 

But till that time comes..

“I’ll...really be looking forward to it.” he said biting back his words and smiling softly 

“Likewise.” you said smiling as you both parted your ways, at least for the time being. 

------------------------------------------

Explanation/note: when i wrote this, i made y/n be a ‘foster’ siblings with Draken and childhood friends with Mikey and Keisuke. << Reason being is because i gave her a backstory where she was neglected and ran away, hence her having a more naturing personality. Y/n and Keisuke were a couple till he died but Kazutora always loved Y/n so it’s a love triangle in a way? I don’t know, but Kazutora grew envious of Keisuke in this ff which ended up being a motive to stabbing him during the fight, to which he later regrets and gets punishment for. Y/n in the story doesn’t know that so that’s why Kazutora can’t accept her love for real because he doesn't know if Y/n will really forgive him after that, and Kazutora won’t be able to learn/accept love till he admits what he did. Holding in that secret, and being in love with Y/n makes him feel frustrated and act out. And obviously time is the theme of this whole story. Kazutora at the end decided to avoid his feelings because the way things are going right now fro the time being for him are fine because he doesn't believe he deserves anything more.  But that can only last for so long, so he’s gambling with his relationship with you. He thinks of it as his punishment for now, not being able to tell you how he really feels, and not being able to comfort you.

ANYWAYS hope you liked it, sorry if it’s confusing. 

[joshstambourine]

A Seconds Glance

"Hi I have a request for either Josh or Jake 💛 can I get a story where they see a girl, either at school or they can already be famous in this, and is instantly enamored. I don't know if you've seen The Virgin Suicides, but if you have then something similar to when Trip sees Lux for the first time. I'm interested in how those two would go about getting a girl's attention when they have a crush.💕💕💕" - Anonymous

//Hi Doll! I can’t say I have seen that--- but I will try my best to write something that I feel matches the idea you had. 

I’m gonna be repeating this forever--- but again, I’m so sorry it took me so long to get this request out for you! I decided to go with Josh being in school for this one.//

Warnings: Cursing, awkward beans

Word Count: 1969

Synopsis: Josh had never really believed in love at first sight... but yet....

Josh Kiszka x Fem!Reader

The first day of sophomore year. For most this was just the start of another school year; a sudden reminder that a new binder or fun pencil case is exciting for all of 10 minutes when it comes to actual classes and work. But for Josh… this year felt like it was filled with possibilities. It sounds like some sort of stupid thing you'd see on a motivational calendar, but it really truly did.

Josh hadn't imagined for a second that he actually would have a chance in making music his career; and yet, he had spent all summer with his band mates playing for different occasions and pubs. All the while they were working, working hard on writing songs that they could be proud to play for others.

All of that said, Josh was returning to high-school this year with a new found amount of confidence and excitement; it showed in every step Josh took. His one hand held loosely on to the arm of his backpack, walking in time with Jake.

"But what do you think? Would it look good on me?" Jake inquired, fingers lightly playing with the mid-length pieces of hair on his head.

"I mean… I don't know…" Josh lightly starts, glancing at his twin and begins to take a good long look at him.

Jake's eyes widened just a touch, his expression becoming one that said, 'Well…?'

"Uh… honestly I don't really know Jake. I've never seen you with anything else than this." Josh admits, then snickers a little, "Except for that one time when we decided it'd be fun to take those scissors and---"

"No, that's fine, I didn't need to think about that." Jake immediately stopped him, his hand going to take a full dive into his mess of dark brown hair. 

"Cmon, it was really funny though. Ma really lost her shit when she saw your head like that." Josh continued to muse, hands folding into his pockets with the utmost of ease. 

Jake shook his head in a mournful way, "I can say I will never go back to a buzz-cut again… not without a fight."

Josh's smile never faltered, it was his laughter that changed, softening into a bit of a sigh as they reached the double doors at the front of the school. With a swing of the doors they both were making their way down the hallway to their lockers.

"Meet by Mr.Shapiro's class before lunch?" Jake questioned, to which Josh nodded. No matter which school the twins went to the teachers seemed to know that the best course of action was to keep them separated. That said Josh and Jake always had separate homerooms at least, through most of their time in school.

"See ya in a bit." Josh waved, taking a few steps back before turning on his heels and heading to his own locker.

Josh's excitement to be back in class showed on his face more than he probably would have wanted. A few pencils in his hand along with a binder filled with blank paper and tucked away dividers.  

As soon as Josh stepped into the class room his eyes were met with many familiar faces. Some of these people he had been in school with since kindergarten; like Meg, a rather tall blunt faced girl with long kinky black hair. She simply threw a peace sign Josh's way as he stepped through the doors; he eagerly returned it, bringing a small smile to Meg's lips. 

With some brisk steps Josh moved to place himself at the back of the classroom, just behind Meg. He threw his things on his desk without much thought. Despite there being a good number of kids he knew... there seemed to be equally just as many new kids. 

Leaning on his desk Josh moved closer to Meg, "Where the hell did these guys come from?" 

Meg's brow lifted as she leaned back a little, "Know the high-school on the east side?" 

"The one where you can get crack for super cheap?" Josh inquired, 

Meg's head bobbed, "They closed it down, so now we get half the kids that went there." She explains with her head resting on her hand in a bored way. 

"Oh shit really? That's a lot of kids---" Josh was quick to respond, glancing around the room. 

"Oh yeah... way too many in my personal opinion --- not that anyone cares." Meg mutters, beginning to click her mechanical pencil. 

Josh's eyes were still taking in all the new faces as he started to respond, "Wow aren't we positive today." 

Meg sighed, "Eh.... I'm just not excited, Justin and I broke up over the summer and I'll have to see him in history." She began to explain, "Things are just really tense, yknow?" 

She waited a moment for him to give some comforting... but still idiotic response, however none came. It finally got Meg to turn and look at him, as she did she immediately noticed that Josh's eyes had widened just a touch, cheeks dusted a light pink. 

Meg followed the line of his eyes to a beautiful young woman. The expression he wore was more than enough to tell Meg that she should move. 

Josh was so busy just... taking the new girl in that he didn't even notice Meg slip to the free desk to the side of the one she was previously sat in. Josh just couldn't put his finger on it, there was something... something so breathtaking about her. Was it her eyes? Or maybe how her hair fell around her face? He couldn't be sure. What he was absolutely sure of was that he had never had a moment in his life where he could hear music just by looking at someone. 

"Hey... do you know if this desk is free?" A new voice shook Josh. It was her. She was standing at a desk to his left with a bit of an awkward air. 

He was just so shaken. What did she say again? Something about a desk? Josh's lips parted, "Uh--- I uh, what did you--?" 

"No that one isn't open, but the one just in front of my dude Josh is, right Josh?" Meg interrupted, pointing to the desk ahead of him. 

"Oh y-yeah, that one's open! Definitely 100% open! It couldn't be more open even if it tried!" Josh started spouting, he really wasn't even aware that his mouth had moved, and that was clear in the fact that it just kept moving when she had come to sit down. "Do you need any pencils at all?? I have like 20!" He continued, though his hand held one full sized pencil and one shorter than the average person's pinkie... both chewed on. "I mean not on me but--- who needs a pencil right?" 

The girl laughed a little awkwardly, her gaze moving from Josh to Meg and then to the desk. "No, no I'm okay thank you though." She slipped into the chair, keeping her gaze frontwards. 

Meg looks to Josh with a shocked look, 'What was that??' She mouthed, 

Josh responded with an absolutely mortified expression. He would never say he was the smoothest guy on the planet, but he had never been that awkward in his life. 

Meg shook her head before reaching out to tap the girl's shoulder, "I'm Meg!" She introduces, "And that goober is Josh." 

The girl lightly moved to glance over her shoulder at Josh in a shy way. "It's nice to meet you both. I'm (Y/N)." She hummed with a sweet smile. 

"That's a pretty name, isn't it Josh??" Meg quickly said, trying to get him to continue the conversation in a less awkward way.

Josh nodded very enthusiastically, "The prettiest name I've heard in a long time!" He said with a smile, 

(Y/N)'s cheeks began to hold a flush of their own. "Oh! Uh... th-thank you!" She sputtered out. 

'OH FUCK. She's so cute.' Josh thought to himself, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat with a shaky swallow. 

Little did Josh know that (Y/N) was thinking something very similar. She might not make it as obvious as he was, but being so much closer now... being able to see the warmth in his brown eyes, seeing how his wavy brown hair came to cup his cheeks --- she couldn't help but continue to stare back at him. 

The only thing that could pull them both out of the little trance they had fallen into was the bell. Both of them quickly looked toward it, followed by a man's voice at the front of the class. 

"Alright everyone, take your seats!" 

(Y/N) was reluctant but she turned herself to look toward the front of the class. A little bit nervous, but mustering an ounce of courage she tore a piece of paper from her notebook quietly and began to scribble something down. 

Josh hardly got anything out of that language arts class, he was way too busy trying to figure out what excuse he could make to talk with (Y/N) again. He was just rattling through every little conversation starter he had ever heard in his life... but none of them felt like they would work. 

Before long the bell had rung overhead once more and everyone was shuffling to grab their things and head to all of their next classes. 

Biting his lip, Josh was determined to catch (Y/N) before she could head off to her own next class. Luckily for him she had a similar idea. Both turning to each other as they stepped out of the classroom, it was painfully quiet at first. It seemed as if they were trying to get their thoughts together really. 

Finally they spoke, 

"Hey would you---" "I was wondering if you'd---" 

At once. 

A small awkward laugh left their lips, "Please, go ahead I was going to say something dumb---" Josh quickly said moving to rub the back of his neck. 

(Y/N)'s lips parted as she let out and unsure chuckle, eyes moving downwards for a moment. "I was just going to ask if you would mind if I joined you for lunch? I just am new and don't really have any---" 

"Yes!" Josh quickly said, "Yes absolutely. You didn't even have to ask, you could have just showed up if you wanted to!" He quickly says to her. 

The speed he seemed to talk at entertained (Y/N) a heck of a lot. A smile creeping across her face, "Okay! Thank you!" She responded. 

"Do you know where the cafeteria is? I can show ya if you want??" Josh quickly continued, "I mean I'm sure you could find it on you're own, you seem very smart and capable. Most women are to be honest; I remember reading an article about how men need to---" 

"That would be really great actually." (Y/N) smiled in a gentle way. 'He's even more nervous than I am.' She thought to herself. 

"Oh-oh! Okay cool! Uh, do you know where Mr.Shapiro's class is?" He asks, 

(Y/N) seemed to think for a minute, "113... right? I have him for chemistry this afternoon I think." She mutters. 

Josh swiftly nods his head, "That's the one!! Meet me there okay?" He says. 

(Y/N) nodded back, understanding the little plan they now had. "I'll see you in a little bit then?" She lightly asks. 

"Yeah absolutely." Josh began to grin, suddenly beyond excited. Even as she began to walk off to her class all he could think about was how sure he was now that this year was going to be fantastic. 

That was until a warning bell played overhead, "Oh shit--" Josh jumped in shock, immediately beginning to run to his next class.

//That's all for now lovely! I do actually have an idea on how to continue this one if anyone would like! Pretty please let me know in the comments if that's something you guys would like 💜//