#deprived for so long just to have this happen omg i am SO JOYOUS

[zwoftt]

“oooohhh shiiiit yessss”…. weekly dorym moments + other stuff i found funny in the recent episode !!!

obviously moments are listed no particular order,,,

never gonna get over the fact that caleb is a cpopper. actually what the hell is this bit

dorian’s envy of caleb… the jealousy in his tone but manages to hide it so smoothly. bro just wants to be happy like caleb and essek are :(

caleb commenting on dorian’s pants during the first initial conversation LOLLLL “we get the idea” and robbie’s little head tilt thingy he does for dorian’s reaction AGH.

”we’re more of an improv crew” says dorian as liam fucking loses it (i hc that orym starts laughing))

orym saying he can’t fall from great heights and survive, dorian suggesting that he can make orym fly.

when beau says dorian looks like the type of guy to make a toast, and dorian gets all nervous about it- orym says “yeah she’s right. he is,” and gives a little nod to dorian.

the small glance dorian and orym make towards each other during the talk about weddings. “something to look forward to.”

liam accidentally calling dorian “dorym”

robbie’s little excited squeal when liam initiates a scene between orym and dorian ….

orym *wordlessly* pulling dorian by his hand to the side AAAAAAGGH

THE KISS!!! IT WAS SO PERFECT FOR THEM !!! orym asking consent beforehand, dorian’s awkward but very into it response… then after when orym asks if this is something dorian wants, and dorian replies with “oh, i want.” and KISSES HIM BACK. everything has been moving so slow for them and they finally get the chance to clash lips for 10 seconds… absolutely golden.

liam’s dance at the end when dorian moves in again and kisses orym back,,, the excited faces all over the table. and then braius. LOL.

[perverse-idyll]

Snarry rec: Rapture by mia_ugly

This morning I read a post going around in which an anonymous asker snidely insulted a Drarry reccer for being (in Anonymous’s lofty opinion) too cliquish in their choice of recs. This is both uncharitable and childish and stinks of jealousy. But it reminded me of how much I used to love reccing and commenting. Both reflect a joyous impulse to give back to the community, and both have fallen by the wayside for me. My present life is a grindstone, and with the best will in the world I’m mostly a passive consumer. But I’ve got plenty of old recs and comments tucked away in journal forums, and it will give me a pleasant nostalgic pang to exhume and post them from time to time.

The first one doesn’t really need reccing - it’s a classic of Snarry fandom by now. Mia has gone on to exhilarate and destroy readers in other fandoms and share their extraordinary gifts. But I was there when Rapture was first posted, and it took me by the scruff and shook me.

Prepare for Scary Fangirl flailing; it broke several comment boxes, and I’m not known for brevity in any case. Beware long paragraphs. Also, Spoilers Ahoy. (And Mia, if you see this, I hope it’s not embarrassing to have this dragged into the light again.)

Rapture

Jesus fucking God. I've been sitting here for ten minutes trying to pull myself together and not explode with flailing emotion all over this comment box. There is no way to get around saying, I LOVE THIS MORE THAN WORDS CAN TELL AND MY HEART JUST GREW FIVE TIMES ITS NORMAL SIZE, just so we're clear, but that doesn't even begin to express how I feel about this fic. And I have to admit, I made it almost all the way to the end without crying, my eyes just stinging now and then and my breath backing up in my chest, but no crying, because I am a stubborn bitch and because, damn it, it would have interfered with my ability to keep reading. And then I got to the end, and you pulled the rug out from under me by breaking the fourth wall and throwing this whole intense, private, unshakable demonstration of life-long, sacrificial love out of the fic's bounds and into the world, and I fucking lost it. *pauses to keep from bursting into tears again* Because yes, you earned that, this story earned the right to challenge canon's law and turn the whole interpretation back on itself, rewrite history, and save the unsalvageable, not just Snape's life but his whole bloody existence as a human being. You fucking broke my heart with a Severus who was damaged and careworn and bitterly defensive and deprived and still too young to completely understand why the world hurt so much and so touchingly vulnerable to the slightest hint that someone might - hell, not even love or want him, but not be repelled by him. Might think he was worth making breakfast for, OMG. I don't know how you did it, how you created a young Severus who seems a natural precursor to canon!Snape, whose traits are so recognizable but whose motives are so much deeper and more compelling and complex and heart-wrenching. (Well, yes, I do know, because I know who's the better writer. But.) I'm sorry, I tend to fall into run-on sentences when I'm trembling with excitement. This is the sort of mow-you-down fic that sometimes happens in Snarry, that absolutely takes possession of the reader, and right now it's like every cell in my body's lit up and electrified by the sheer beauty of this fic. I mean, it's breathtaking. And one of the things that makes it unaccountably painful to read, painful because it's like the answer to a longing I've been carrying around forever and this fic is - not the antidote, but the embodiment of that longing - the thing that raises this fic into the realm of "I didn't know this was possible, how did she do that" is the way you portray the doomed, tentative, self-denying, inadmissible depth of love on both sides - both sides. Yes, it's worth repeating that. And you achieve it through the ravishes of language, of images that contain so much emotion and sorrow and humanity it's a wonder they don't burst. It make so much sense that these two young, lost souls would form a bond if allowed to meet each other on common ground. And both of them are exactly the kind of people who would give themselves, and once having given, not be able to take back, not be able to give up, not - at least in Severus' case, as the self-hating one - be able to give in. And each needs the other to save him from himself, for himself, whether he realizes it or not. My God, the whole fic sings like a cello, with its almost unbearable range of warmth and yearning. It's astonishing how you keep adding layer after layer to the heart-hammering tension between them, the tentative emotional duets - and oh, while I'm thinking about it, the sex scenes are astonishing for the way erotic discovery becomes a vehicle for such powerful interior transformation, such breaking and remolding, a physical act capable of touching their deepest beings - and without resorting to romance clichés. It rings absolutely true because of who they are and everything in their lives that has brought them to this point, which you lay bare for us with grace and economy, grit and judgment.

I love  the scene with Aganetha - awful and funny (I've known people exactly like  that) and a glimpse into Snape's Muggle side. Into his stubborn loyalty. I love how the watch keeps sabotaging Harry, forcing him to betray Severus over  and over, to abandon him, dangle hope in front of him and snatch it away.  It's emotional torture, and yet it's a joyful thing to see him persist, to  see Severus thaw into banter, to watch the shy infatuation break through the  rude surface. His inexperience seems both inevitable and hopelessly  endearing, because he had no idea. So of course sex, of course love, would be devastating. And Harry's blossoming obsession with returning to him,  the ache of knowing that the story ends with Snape dead, since the watch is  purely a retrospective sort of magic and history can't be changed; the fact  that love grows up between them in tiny bursts despite a separation of  months, years, is both a balm, a thing of beauty, and an ice pick to the chest. Because that love is another reason why Severus will enslave and  sacrifice himself for Harry's sake, will live years of torment watching Harry  grow up (as that opening scene proves, where Severus vomits uncontrollably). It seems destined only to make each man suffer the knowledge of what true  love is while denying him any chance of ever having it.   And through it all runs the beauty of your prose, the unique observations,  the gorgeous, delicate, blessed words that deal emotion and delight, play  them against each other, and then reshuffle the deck. You have a marvelous  visual gift, conjuring scenes and characters with wasting words. But even  more spellbinding, because more rare, is the intensity and subtlety of your  emotional descriptions. You've got a light touch, and it's no doubt due to  the hints and silences and small breaths in between that the evolution of  Severus and Harry's emotions seems so natural and yet miraculous and so  deeply layered into their bones, their very beings, so that their absence in  each other's lives has the impact of tragedy. You write them in such a way  that they make each other whole. I could go on at great length about your  writing style, my immersion in your prose and the way my own heart sometimes  stopped at certain images and I felt I couldn't go forward until I'd absorbed  my delirious pleasure or fist-clenching pain. Ordinarily I'd select lines to  quote at you, but it would be a never-ending comment, and besides, I've  already tried that and got so engrossed in re-reading that this comment  languished for half an hour.   And there's so much more. I'm delighted by the subplot around Ginny and Harry's "rational" marriage and poor Ginny's unreciprocated  feelings for Hermione. I found that oblique detail unexpectedly moving. Also,  thank you for the moment in which Dumbledore is actually saddened to hear  that Severus will die, because damn it, that grief is completely lacking in  canon. I still shudder a little over the way Harry's first confession of love  affected me - my God, the way you wrote that scene made me feel I couldn't  take much more - I don't know what to call it, triumph, exaltation, the sense  that Severus' world is about to shatter. He will never not know  love again. I was also impressed by the shift from the focus on Severus' slow  waking up, his being possessed by this love that will never leave him, that  will inform who he is until the bitter end, the most magical, meaningful  thing in his life - to the revelation (because that's what it was to me) that  Harry shares the same kind of desperate, too-late, ineradicable experience of  losing his heart. It shook me to see Harry as smitten and bereft and  dedicated as Severus, as resigned to never loving anyone as much as he'd  loved Snape. The unreformed romantic in me pretty much died and went to  heaven.

And then Snape's reaction to his father's funeral, oh good heavens, and Harry's kindness. The poetic epigraphs and Snape coming back to save Harry and "Please do not make me continue," he murmurs, "I'm hideous at this" and the fact that they can't stay away from each other. How every conversation is composed of humor and ripped-bare truth and verbal fencing and - I'm just blown away by the artistry of this fic. It turns me into a babbling idiot who wastes words and yet can't quite articulate how much this exhilarates me. Or how I fell head over heels in love with both Severus and Harry, to the point that their pain gave me pain and their happiness gave me happiness. In most fics, calling Snape beautiful is a sign to hit the backbutton, but Harry's right this time, he's right and it's the truth and I'm so impressed that you found a way to say this that shines out of the fic and haloes them both - because beauty and prettiness are two different things, and many people don't realize that Snape can be beautiful while remaining exactly who he is. But you get that. And so does Harry. And then the ending. You trump brilliance with brilliance. I'm not sure a fic's ever kicked me over the edge like that into wonder and triumph and, you know, coming to pieces. And I thank you for it. I've spent all day with this fic - reading it, thinking about it, trying to give back to you some inkling of what you gave me and what this story means to me. All I can do is conclude with a word that sums up both my response and my belief in what this fic was created from and what it achieves. Love. *bows at your feet*