#deja blue smut

[whxre-bxby]

Could you do a recoms x recom!reader where all the guys suddenly go into heat (?) at the same time and reader is like 'oh shit' and tries to run but they catch and Fuck her?

Kinda like cursed by blue but then with reversed roles lol

Yes my lady, here it is

F. Recom Y/N x Recom Lyle, Mansk, Prager, Lopez, Ja

"Get It Together"

Masterlist

Summary: read the ask :)

Warnings: smut, tiny bit of angst and fluff, cursing, non-con, breeding kink, mating, heat cycle, unprotected sex, oral sex, penetration

Word Count: 4085

A/N: sorry that the uploads are slower, I'm busy and losing motivation just a little. I've also revived my Harry Potter obsession

Today felt weird. Weirder than usual. Waking up in an Avatar is already odd enough, but something seemed even more different today. The team seemed different. 

Quaritch is desperate for you all to help him successfully find and kill Sully, so you’re back in the forest again. The Deja Blu squad seems to be spending more time outside than anywhere else. But you’re not complaining. To you, the world of Pandora is beautiful. You’re not as afraid of it as before. Probably because you’re no longer human. But that’s your secret. You’re scared to find out what would happen to you if anyone found out you like this planet and its nature. 

The Colonel split the squad into two groups again. He led his team while Lyle led yours. Lyle was ranking second highest out of all of you, so he was put in charge. He’s leading the way through the large leaves and past the hundreds and thousands of trees. Behind him, Mansk is following. You’re after him. Trailing slightly behind you is Lopez along with Prager and Ja is watching the back. 

You were pleased with this group because you all got along well. But today is different. No one is talking. You’ve tried to initiate a conversation multiple times but they either don’t listen or just nod and hum in response. Even Lyle has his mouth shut today. Not a soul seems to be in a good mood, so you decide not to push it. There’s no need to start an unnecessary fight. 

“You always wear that?” someone says behind you, suddenly breaking the long-lasting silence. 

You recognise Lopez’s voice and when you turn around you see that he is looking at your lower half. 

“The shorts?” you ask while continuing to walk. He glances up for a split second before fixating his gaze on your shorts once more. His head nods. 

“No. It’s just warmer today.” you answer him, not thinking anything of his question. Maybe he didn’t even know the RDA provided shorts. 

‘Fuckin’ right it’s warmer.’ Lopez thinks, wiping his hand across his forehead. It was warm but the temperatures here never reached the high of making their Avatar’s sweat. He doesn’t know what’s going on with him and why his body temperature seems to be through the roof, but he notices he isn’t the only one. Lopez had vaguely scanned the others and everyone seemed to be struggling. Everyone except for you. And he doubted it was because you’re wearing shorts. 

As you keep walking, you can feel Lopez’s stare on your body. It never leaves and when you look over your shoulder, he doesn’t seem to notice or bother to hide it. 

“Can you not?” you ask, making him suddenly lock eyes with you again. He looks confused. “I can feel you looking.” 

Lopez internally curses himself for being so obvious. He didn’t mean to, but his judgment is not trustworthy today. His ears occasionally ring and his mind seems to go blank. Especially when he looks at you. 

Prager lightly punches his shoulder, seeming to tell him off through actions.

“What’s he doin’?” Lyle asks, calling out his words from the front. You open your mouth to reply but Lopez quickly intervenes. 

“Nothin’.” he says, making Lyle turn around and cock an eyebrow. 

His words make your ears tip back. He never acted like this. 

“Walk in front of me then.” you say, stopping so that he can overtake you. 

Lopez shakes his head, taking your arm and pulling you along. 

“So that Prager can get a look? No way.” he scoffs and Prager glares at him. 

“The fuck does that mean?” you ask, pulling your arm from his. 

Mansk had turned around and saw how Lopez held you. It pissed him off too. 

“Keep walkin’.” Lopez says, avoiding eye contact. 

“What is up with you, today?” you ask with a small chuckle. 

But not even Lopez knows how to answer that. His behaviour is confusing him too.

You shrug it off, continuing to follow Lyle and Mansk. Many minutes go by in silence and you think that things have returned to normal again. 

They haven‘t. 

In the next few seconds, you feel your tail brush against something. Assuming it‘s a plant, you don‘t bother checking. But then it happens again. And again.

Finally, you turn your head and see Lopez much closer than expected. It gives you a little fright. 

“Shit-“ you gasp, inhaling deeply to calm down. “Lopez, what are you-“ 

“Look at her tail.” He exclaims, interrupting you and taking your tail into his hand. Ja walks up next to him, looking down at it. 

One of his hands is holding its middle while his free one caresses the tip of your tail, examining the soft hair coming out. You’ve also noticed that yours was longer. And your stripes continued all the way down. Everyone else had their tail partly shaved. 

“Check out the stripes.” Ja chuckles, watching the odd pattern of so-called stripes spiral up your tail until their eyes reach its base. The rest is covered in clothes.

“Yours are different from ours.” Lopez murmurs and you stop walking, trying to snatch your tail away but they won't let you. Both of them are still looking at where your tail ends and you don’t understand why they’re so fascinated by it. 

“What’s it look like?” He asks, looking up at you with a shit-eating grin. Your eyes go wide at his bold question and you frown. 

“Doesn’t concern you.” You snarl. What’s under your clothes is none of his business. 

“Hey!” Lyle calls from the front. He and Mansk both turned around, watching the interaction before Lyle felt like he needed to step in. “Let ‘er be.”

Lopez meets his eye, staring him down for a few extra seconds before scoffing and letting go of you. Once free, you’re being touched again. Lyle is guiding you by your shoulders to the front, not wanting Lopez around you anymore. 

You just go with it, assuming he has some kind of plan. At the end of the day, you trust Lyle with your life, so you don’t question his decisions. 

While walking away, you feel Lopez’s and Ja’s fierce eyes on you. Behind them you can hear Prager panting and nothing seems to make sense anymore. 

You keep walking and you hear Lyle faintly call them both insulting names under his breath before he stretches his arm around you. He starts by throwing it over your shoulder and your walking pace stutters. Mansk is keeping a close eye on what's happening, as is everyone behind you. He doesn’t want Lyle crossing the line either. 

But your presence and the close physical contact have Lyle under a sort of spell. It makes him crave more from you and within minutes, his arm is around your waist and he’s holding you to his side. You’re body tenses and you stop walking. Everything is so confusing you can’t even think straight.

Lyle looks back at you and your concerned eyes before Mansk grabs his arm and removes it from your body. 

“What are you doin’?” Lyle asks him, wanting to snake it around your waist again but you push it away. 

“No, what are you doing? All of you!” You shout, looking around. You’re about to exclude Mansk from the lecture you plan on giving them but you notice his pupils dilate and target lock on you. It makes you forget what you were about to say. Luckily you recover quickly.

“I don’t know what the fuck is going on with you, but you need to sort it out right now so that we can focus on this mission!” You shout, folding your arms in front of your chest and glaring at all of them. 

There’s a few seconds of silence. As if they need extra time to let your words sink in. 

“All right.” Lyle growls. His voice is lower than ever. You want to nod and thank him for his agreement but the look in his eye tells you that you’re not both thinking of the same thing. 

You thought that maybe they all got in a fight and didn‘t want to mention it around you. But the dark hunger in his expression suddenly makes you feel like you need to escape. 

You don’t know why you feel the need to run when a part of you longs to be around them. 

Lyle is walking back up to you and his arm stretches out to grab a hold of you once more but Mansk once again intervenes. It seems as though his last functioning cell of common sense told him to help you. But right after he pushes Lyle’s arm away, he’s just as lust-blinded as the rest of them are. You see it in him now too. 

Which is why this time, you don’t hesitate to run. Your feet take off in the opposite direction and you’re sprinting through the forest. 

You hear Lyle growl at Mansk before your ears pick up the sound of hammering footsteps behind you. They seem to be moving faster than yours which surprises you because a human’s survival instinct is the strongest.

However, you’re not human anymore and neither are they. It seems as though your new bodies have a stronger instinct than just survival. 

Mating.

You’re fast, but unfortunately not fast enough. All weapons and tools have been dropped to chase you. They have to catch you by hand and force. The way nature tells them to. For once, they must give in to what their body craves and forget their human morals. 

But their rut doesn’t just affect them. Being around them, hearing them, smelling them, seeing them, and feeling them kickstarts hormones in your own body. Ones you were suppressing until you started running. Running and chasing are apparently common during heat-cycles so the instinct that told you to run is also the one that betrayed your mind and gave all power to your body and its needs. 

Lyle caught your arm, making you stumble and slow down. With his next step, he managed to wrap an arm around your middle and lift you off the ground but the sheer force of the turn had you both falling into the grass. 

You shriek as he spins you both around once before you hit the ground first with him falling on top of you. Immediately, you struggle beneath his weight, trying to crawl out from underneath him but you can’t move him. 

Suddenly, you felt like it wasn’t Lyle who was holding you down. You know it is, but he’s never growled and acted like this. It feels so foreign to you but then again, you feel your body doing things you would never do. 

Almost instantly his large hands start tugging your clothes off of you but for whatever reason, you lean against his touch. 

You’re still trying to hold on to your common sense, desperately attempting to not give in to his touch whereas Lyle is a lost cause. 

Your last spark of hope forces you to kick Lyle’s middle but he is unfazed. 

“Sorry- can’t help it.” he breathes out, pulling your shorts down your legs. Well, there you have it. You’re done for. Might as well enjoy it then.

The others have already caught up with both Lyle and you. Ja wanted to get closer but Lyle snarled at him, making him back off. You guess that since he has the highest rank in this team, he wants to go first. 

Lyle’s body feels strange to him and foreign. It’s overheating as well and the only answer to help him feel normal again is in front of him. His large hand comes up to knead the flesh of your ass before he’s hastily opening his belt and clawing at his pants. 

You know what to expect at this point. It’s inevitable really. There’s five of them and one of you. You can’t escape even if you manage to push Lyle off. And quite frankly, the longer you inhale his musky scent and feel him on you, the less you want to leave. It irritates you how easily your body is swayed by them but you can’t help it either. 

Lyle grabs the side of your underwear, hooking his fingers underneath it and literally tearing the fabric off your body. If you were in your right mind right now, you would have felt exposed. But no, you don’t even feel the need to hide from their eyes. In fact, their presence seems to make you more aroused. 

Suddenly ripping you from your thoughts is the feeling of Lyle pressing something right up against your entrance. Feeling its form, you straight away know what it is and without any hesitation, Lyle starts to push it inside you. He hisses as your walls clamp down on him, not seeming to be used to this intrusion. But it doesn’t stop him. The man is desperate for you and desperate for release. 

Within seconds he has bottomed out, holding himself inside you for an extra few moments to contain himself. But it’s no use. The second he starts to move, completely loses himself and his motions become primal.

Lyle doesn’t start off slowly either. He’s already harshly fucking himself into you while his fingertips dig into the flesh of your hips. You spread your arms slightly past shoulder distance to steady yourself while your hips push back against him. 

Everything suddenly feels sensitive and all his touches spark more excitement in you. Which is why Lyle knows he won’t last long. You feel too good and it’s been too long. 

“Fuck- so good,” he groans, wrapping his hand around the base of your tail to pull you back against him. Small whines and whimpers leave your lips whenever it feels like he is pushing the air from your lungs. 

“M’ gonna fill you up,” he grunts, speeding up his thrusts. You weren’t expecting any of this to last long, but you know that just because he’ll be done soon doesn’t mean you will. The other four men around you look even more interested in you than before. There is no way you’re leaving without having to go through each of them first. 

“Gonna make this pussy mine.” he growls, not stopping his rough thrusts until his hips stutter and you feel him spurt his cum inside you. You still your small rocking movements, taking all of him into you. His large hands are holding onto your waist while Lyle gathers himself. His problem seems to be cured for now. But the others are still very bothered by it, so the second Lyle pulls out, Mansk takes his place. He pushes Lopez to the side because he can’t wait any longer. 

Mansk falls to his knees behind you, immediately pushing your tail to the side to see your throbbing cunt. God, what a luring sight it is. Especially with Lyle’s cum slowly dribbling out. It just makes Mansk want to wash it out and replace it with his own. 

To your surprise, Lopez settles himself in front of you. You can hear Ja complaining but Lopez doesn’t care. Sure, he would much rather be where Mansk is but right now he’ll take whatever he can get. His skin is glistening in sweat and he just needs to feel you on him in any way possible. 

Mansk’s pants are gone faster than Lyle’s and he doesn’t even need to line himself up with your entrance to guide himself in. He’s so hard he just bucks his hips forward blindly while pressing his chest against your back. He feels his dick sink into you on his third attempt and it has him melting against you. Mansk is and has been desperate for this kind of relief for so long. The fact that it’s you he’s getting makes this so much better for him. 

Lopez has managed to free his aching erection from its restraints as well and is now panting while watching you stare at him. He can feel your hot breath fan against his bare skin and it causes his eyes to flutter closed. He never thought he could get this close to you. 

Mansk moves behind you, making your body jolt forward. Your cheek brushes against Lopez’s dick and you give up on staring. The sight has your mouth salivating. Not only are they all so big, but fuck he looks so needy. 

You turn your head, opening your mouth and licking up his shaft. He groans and you notice the goosebumps erupt on his skin. Lopez is so hard it hurts so he attaches his hand to the back of your head, hoping to encourage you to finally help him out. You obey his silent pleas and open your mouth wider to welcome his tip. His breath gets caught in his throat and he doesn’t exhale until you’ve swallowed down almost all of him. 

“Fuck, such a good girl,” he purrs his praise, gently rubbing your cheek before holding the base of your queue to help guide you along his dick. 

Mansk’s thrusts are already getting sloppy so you arch your back to give yourself to him, making it easier for him to reenter you. 

Then you focus on the heavily breathing man in front of you and decide to finally focus on him. You gulp around him, feeling his tip in the middle of your throat. Having something stuffed so far down your mouth is not a pleasant feeling, but seeing how it drives Lopez wild just gives you the equal pleasure he is receiving. 

You don’t need to move your head, he’s already pulling his hips back and slowly pushing them forward again for you. All you have to do is not choke and not let him feel your teeth. This gets twice as difficult when you have fangs but so far you’re succeeding. 

You flatten your tongue out and occasionally swirl it around him when he draws back. 

Both of them have sped up their thrusts and you feel Lopez’s dick twitch inside your mouth which lets you know that he won’t last much longer. 

Mansk is now hugging your waist and one of his hands digs into your thigh. 

You start to feel your own orgasm slowly build up but with the way they’re feeling, you know you’ll still need more time until you start feeling euphoric.

“Shit, take it.” Mansk growls, biting your shoulder while he humps you from behind, shooting his load into you just like Lyle. But you honestly don’t care about that at the moment. You even doubt whether your Avatar is fertile. 

Mansk is regaining his breath above you when Lopez hisses and throws his head back. His hips reflexively buck forwards and he covers your tongue in his cum, making it flow down your throat. You lick him clean after swallowing everything he gave you before gently pulling away. 

He smiles down at you, lightly tapping your cheek in praise before getting up. 

Mansk carefully pulls out, running his hand over your smooth back and humming appreciate before Prager is urging him to move. He listens. You display yourself for Prager byopening your legs and lifting your tail but he seems to have other ideas. The sight makes his stomach twist in excitement but he still turns you onto your back. You’re looking up at him and he flashes you a smirk before Ja interrupts your moment. 

“Seriously, what about me?” he asks, not seeming happy with the sudden position change. 

Prager’s ears flatten back against the sides of his head and he frowns at Ja. 

“Work it out.” he growls. Then his hands find your knees and he opens your legs for him. He wants to properly see you, not just use you. 

Ja huffs in annoyance before lifting your upper body and resting your back on his lap. Prager runs his fingers over your entrance, parting your lips before pushing some cum back inside you. His motions make you shiver and you roll your hips forward while Ja open his pants just enough to relieve himself.

Your body starts reacting to Prager's touch and you realise he’s helping you reach your high too. But since he’s having a hard time containing himself, he removes his fingers from inside of you and replaces them with his length. Suddenly, it feels so good. You’ve gotten used to the intrusion now and it’s becoming pleasurable. 

You turn your head to the side, noticing Ja trying to win your attention over. His dick is next to your face and at this point, you’re too tired and too unbothered to question anything. You just do. They’ve already seen all of you, you have nothing to hide anymore. 

You open your mouth for him just like you did for Lopez but right before you want to wrap your lips around him, a gasp leaves you. Prager has started moving inside you and the new angle and change of position have you enjoying all of it. 

Quickly, you fill your mouth with Ja’s length to prevent moans from slipping out. Those are still something that makes you often feel embarrassed. You know it’s stupid because usually, you want to be able to hear how you’re pleasing someone. But then again, you happen to be in a forest full of creatures that may not welcome you. So you don’t want to be screaming and crying on his cock (you do, but you won’t). 

Your head gets all fuzzy with how good Prager is treating your body. You feel so stimulated that whimpers and moans do leave your body. However, they’re muffled through Ja but the vibrations of it drive him wild. 

He’s been touching himself while watching you with Mansk and Lopez, so he feels like he will spill any second now. 

Prager is just diving into you at this point. His hand comes up to apply gentle pressure to your clit while his other lifts one of your legs onto his shoulders. Everything is good right now. You have no worries. 

“You gonna cum?” he asks, knowing you can’t reply with words. You frantically shake your head, slowly arching your back off the ground in preparation for your orgasm. 

He grins and his pace never falters. 

Behind you, Ja is a groaning mess. He’s just watching you struggle to angle your head for him but he can’t help you with that. He’s so close, you just need to continue for a few more seconds. You do and in moments following you hollowing your cheeks for him, his tail trembles as he cums. Some of it spills out onto your lips but you don’t mind. You just need cum yourself. 

Prager doesn’t stop, in fact he just slightly increases his touch on your clit and you cry out once before your legs tremble and your orgasm floods your senses. Feeling you clench down around him has Prager in pure bliss and he follows almost straight after you. 

What an odd scene this is. You hadn’t expected your day to go like this. 

Lyle comes to your aid while the two soldiers redress themselves. 

“You alright?” he asks but he can’t hold back the cheeky grin on his face. 

“Yeah-” you breathe out. “I’m just so done.”

He chuckles, handing you your shorts and helping you put them on.

“You fuckers, it’ll stain the cloth.” you mumble, knowing all the cum will just leak out of you for the rest of the day. 

“Don’t worry, you can get a refill later.” Lopez smirks as Lyle helps you to your feet and you punch Lopez’s shoulder. 

A loud sigh leaves your lips. 

“I can’t even walk back now.” you whine in frustration. 

“I’ll carry you then.” Lyle offers with a grin and Mansk smirks. 

“No, I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.” you say, realising you’re contradicting yourself. 

Mansk raises an eyebrow at you and you wipe your hand over your face. 

“I just like to complain.” you mumble, starting to slowly walk ahead. Your first few steps are wobbly, but you manage because Mansk and Prager walk next to you, letting you use them for support. Lyle leads the way again. 

He’s calling off the mission for the day. We just have to come up with some excuse as to what happened. 

Tag List: @ken-dala @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed @numarusworld @number1gal @ikranwings @jatwow

[lovebugism]

you’re writing for carmy now omg i’m frothing at the mouth 😭 i love the trope where reader is quiet in bed and needs to be coaxed a bit but… i feel like it would be kind of hot if reader was the one coaxing carmy? 👀 no worries if you’re not feeling this one!

ty for requesting! — you teach the bear how to use his voice in the bedroom (new relationship, inexperienced!carmy, experienced!reader-ish, smut 18+)

bug's summer fic fest (⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

Carmy never notices when he’s quiet. His head is always so loud in comparison — it’s easy to forget he isn’t saying anything out loud when his mind’s constantly racing. He doesn’t mean anything by it, though. He’s just chronically observant. And painfully silent with it.

He lays on his back, pressed between unmade sheets and your warm body. The covers bunch at your bare hips as you roll in languid thrusts over his lap. A satiny summer breeze smooths over your burning skin from a cracked-open window. Every time the curtains billow, more of the moonlight peeks in. It drips in silver shades over your naked skin and your pretty face, now twisted in a look of undeniable pleasure — brows scrunched, eyes closed, mouth wide open.

Carmy’s tattooed hands rest impatiently on your hips. His fingers dig into the plush of them as he rocks you back and forth over his cock. You make pretty noises for him every time your clit brushes his coarse thatch of pubic hair, so he angles his hips just right to make sure you keep hitting that spot. 

“Carmy,” you moan in a whimsical sigh that makes his chest swell. “Just like that. ’S so good like that. Please don’t stop—”

His face, made of dark shadows and sharpened edges, is pinched in a look of acute concentration. A distant feeling of deja veux swims in his stomach. It makes him wonder if he’s seen this in a painting before. One of those Renaissance types. The kinds that are harrowingly realistic and always heart-wrenchingly beautiful in a way. 

It makes him want to draw you. Just as you are now. Head tossed back, mouth gently agape, lashes fluttering over glowing cheeks. He wouldn’t be able to do any of it justice, but he tries to memorize the soft lines of your face, anyway. 

Your hips slow to a stop. Reality hits him hard.

“Woah, woah— Hey,” Carmy mumbles in protest, brows pinched in confusion when he comes down from the clouds. Through labored breaths that make his sweaty chest rise and fall, he wonders, “What happened? Why’d you stop?”

His icy blue eyes dart over your face, searching for any sign of harm. In true Carmen Berzatto fashion, he immediately thinks he’s done something wrong — that he got too far in his own head and hurt you in some way without realizing. The anxiety is fleeting, but he feels the pinch of it anyway — right where your palm rests flat on his chest, just over his pounding heart.

“Are you okay?” you ask him, similarly panicked. Your bare chest sparkles with a thin layer of sweat and catches the moonlight with every uneven inhale.

Carmy nods rapidly, chestnut curls brushing the pillow. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m— I’m great. Why?”

You exhale a small sigh of relief, growing sheepish under his unwavering gaze. You feel a bit silly for stopping now. “You just aren’t… You aren’t really, you know… saying anything,” you answer shyly.

“Am I supposed to be saying something?”

You giggle quietly to yourself until you realize he’s being genuine. Your smile ebbs as you stammer, “Well, no, it’s just— Some people usually moan, I guess— When they feel good.”

Carmy nods firmly in reassurance. “I feel good.”

“Okay…” you nod back, slower and more unsure. 

“I promise,” he tells you, tattooed hands squeezing your sides. He shifts nervously on the mattress, similarly victimized by your adoring stare. “I just… I just like watchin’ you, I guess…”

A shy smile quirks the edges of your mouth as you peer down at the boy beneath you. “You’re sweet, bear,” you coo in a honeyed murmur.

“You’re sweeter,” Carmy insists. You think you see the faintest hint of a grin on his lips, but it’s hard to tell in the low light. “Wanna taste?” he teases a second later.

Wordlessly, you bend down for another kiss, far too chaste for his liking. He almost says something about it until you roll your hips again. The words of protest disappear when he inhales sharply through his teeth.

“Does that feel good?” you ask him.

He nods silently, squeezing your sides in a feeble attempt to move you faster on top of him.

“Tell me.”

“Feels good,” Carmy obeys through gritted teeth.

The subtle assurance makes you moan — a pretty, breathy thing that spills accidentally from your opened mouth. All he can think about is getting you to make that sound again. 

“Do you like it when I talk to you?” he wonders aloud, very innocuously curious.

You nod, brows furrowed as you grind over his lap. The bed frame squeaks quietly when you roll your hips forward. When you roll them back again, he can hear the faint sounds of your wet pussy — the quiet schlick-ing of his cock fucking into you. The two noises play one after the other in rhythmic tandem. The sinful sounds of sex.

Carmy racks his head for something to say in the not-so-silent meanwhile. You watch him get lost in his mind and cup his cheeks between gentle palms. “Don’t think so hard about it, bear,” you say with a wavering smile. “You don’t have to say anything. It’s okay.”

You duck down to kiss him again. The angle shifts. Carmy bends his knees and fucks up into you, mercilessly and without warning. Your mouth hangs open in another weak moan that fans across his chin. 

“That good?” he pants.

“Yes,” you whine. “Carmy— fuck— You’re so deep…”

Babbles spill from your mouth in thinkless slurs. They tumble from your swollen lips with an admirable effortlessness, which Carmy has never thought himself to possess. He tries, anyway, to talk to you with such sinful ease. 

“You’re huggin’ me so tight,” he mutters through a clenched jaw. The very first thought to come to mind as the velvet confines of your cunt pulsate around him, squelching quietly in time with his thrusts. “Can feel you throbbin’ around me, babe— Shit— It’s like a fuckin’ heartbeat.”

Your whine fills the quiet bedroom, adding to the symphony of bed squeaking and skin slapping. 

Carmy shifts his hips upward. The new angle allows his cock to reach a spongy depth inside you and pins your swollen clit against his happy trail, which now glimmers with a layer of your honey.

“Right there?” he pants.

You nod wordlessly until the words catch up to you. The tip of your nose brushes the bridge of his. “Yes,” you whimper. 

His brutal thrusts pick up pace a second later, never wavering in their wicked pursuit. “Let me hit that spot,” Carmy mumbles to himself like a man crazed. “Let me hit that spot, let me hit that spot.”

Pleasure swells within you, overwhelmingly so. It’s a warm and sparkling feeling in the pit of your stomach — a tightening coil, a fraying rope, a dam about to burst. The intensity of your inevitable orgasm frightens you.

“Carmy…” you whimper.

“I know,” he nods sympathetically, right before he plants his feet on the mattress. He strengthens his thrusts, which have slowly started to lose their rhythm. “It’s okay. C’mon. Cum for me— I can feel you fuckin’ drippin’ on me, baby— C’mon.”

Your jaw clenches to fight back the scream clawing at your throat. It comes out in a pitiful whimper instead when you tense over his lap. Your orgasm washes over you in waves that leave you shaking, thighs trembling on either side of his hips.

Carmy goes accidentally silent once more as he watches you, swelling with pride as you reach the height of your pleasure. His light eyes flit over your features in a feeble attempt to memorize them — the furrow between your brows, the wrinkles beside your shut eyes, the spit-slicked sheen to your kissed lips.

You’re painting brought to life. A heavenly thing he can’t believe he gets to touch with unworthy hands.

“That’s it…” Carmy murmurs lowly. The words bubble in his throat and fall from his mouth mindlessly. He doesn’t even have to think about them now. It just feels right to praise you like this. “That’s it. There you go. So pretty… Always so pretty for me.”

As your body racks with aftershocks, you seek refuge in his arms. Your weight rests entirely upon him as your tense limbs slowly relax, but Carmy doesn’t mind. He just wraps his tattooed arms around you and holds your trembling body closer.

“I got you,” he promises through labored breaths, chapped lips brushing your temple with every word. “I got you. ’S okay. You did so good for me, baby. Thank you.”

You don’t have the words to tell him that you should be the one thanking him.

[ramp-it-up]

Fade to Love II

Fade to Love

Summary: You and Bucky go way back. Way back to when you acted together 20 years ago. You had a crush on him then, but you were too young. Tragedy and artistic passion made you best friends. Will your history make you lovers?

Word count: 4.3 K

Pairing: Actor!Director!Producer! Bucky Barnes x Reader

A/N: I've been dreaming about this ever since I got my #BuckyBarnesBirthdayBingo by @avengers-assemble-bingo. This fulfills the square: Best Friends to Lovers. As always, I crave feedback, so please let me know how you feel in asks, comments, reblogs and likes. TIA! ❤️

Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI. Read at your own risk. Smut! Best friends to lovers. All of the reckless behaviors that come with growing up in Hollywood, teenage crush, small age gap, young love, tragic loss, idiots in love, cigarette smoking, mutual pining. Then comes the smut. :)

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———

This was deja vu all over again.

The paparazzi swarmed the studio as you and Bucky arrived for your meeting at the studio. After all, you'd spent your teen years under the camera’s glare, a co-star in an ensemble drama series, Idol’s Ridge, that captured the hearts of millions 20 years before. 

During those five years portraying Sophie Randall, you’d met the people who’d become your best and enduring friends. Sam Wilson, who played your older brother, Peter Randall, Carol Danvers, who played your best friend, Morgan Blair, and James “Bucky” Barnes who played Sam’s Best friend and Morgan’s older brother, Jack Blair. 

There were several other actors from the show with whom you’d remained cordial and friendly, but this was your core group. 

But today? Today was different. Today, you were meeting in a creative capacity, not just as an actress. You were going to control the narrative. 

The past twenty years had been a whirlwind. A marriage, scandal, and a career that had taken unexpected turns. You'd left the acting world long ago, but here you were again, standing next to Bucky Barnes, one of your best friends. Someone who’d been through it all with you.

Bucky, with his model handsome looks, dark hair and true blue eyes, was more than just a pretty face. His career had been varied, lucrative, and meaningful.

He was now reaching phenomenal heights. And he was the one the tabloids still associated you with, before, during, and after your marriage, even after all these years. 

The shipping of the characters was inappropriate at the beginning, but toward the end of the run when you were an adult, Idol’s Ridge fans were calling for Jack to notice Sophie, and wanted you and Bucky together, even though you never dated.

It was others pushing that narrative, always trying to create drama where there was none, not you two. 

You and Bucky were just friends.

But if you were being honest, that “what if” had been curling around your mind since you were a kid with a crush on a co-star who was too old for you. 20 to your 15 when you first started the show, Bucky didn’t spare you a second glance in a romantic capacity, but he took you under his wing and protected you, calling you his “Little Star.” 

He decided that nothing was going to ruin your innocence, lecturing you all the time about the pitfalls of fame at a young age, even as he was reveling in those pits. If he knew you wanted him to ruin you, he didn’t let on.

Bucky’s decency did nothing to sway your heart away from him. In fact, it only made him more appealing. You always had a soft spot for Bucky Barnes.

If Bucky noticed you growing up and becoming a woman, he didn’t let you know. You were always his little sidekick, not quite a sister, but definitely not a romantic interest.

Perhaps it was because his best friend, another rising star in tv and film, did. 

Steve met you briefly when he was filming in LA and hanging with Bucky. They were roommates in New York and best friends, having known each other as child actors from Brooklyn.

After he met you when he was 24 and you were 19, Steve talked about you all the time to his best friend and begged Bucky to give you his number. 

Bucky refused, citing the fact that you were not ready for the likes of Steve Rogers, the golden boy heartthrob actor who partied harder than he did. Yes, that was the reason.

On the night of your 21st birthday after Idol’s Ridge was over, you had a get together in Manhattan, because you were filming a movie in New York City. You invited Bucky who was now based out of Brooklyn, and Steve was not going to miss this opportunity to get next to you.

That night, 25 year old Steve Rogers bought you a drink, and the next morning, Bucky heard you two in the room next door, cursing his, and Steve’s, timing. The rest was tabloid history: the whirlwind romance, the young, impetuous marriage, the substances, the breakout films, the nominations, the miscarriage, the rumors, the tragedy. 

You were a widow at the age of 26, the caretaker of the legacy of one of the most talented young actors of your generation. Gone too soon.

Bucky was there for you, and you for him, feeling the loss as no one else could. When you were ready to get on with life, you and Bucky created Valkyrie Production Company as a tribute to Steve.

While you slowed your acting career way down before 30 years old, only taking on about one indie film project a year, Bucky’s career had taken off. 

He’d transitioned from actor to actor/director, and of course, actor/director/producer. You watched him get engaged to Natasha Romanov, one of the older Idol’s Ridge alums, break up, and then date a string of actresses and models, but nothing ever stuck.

You didn’t understand. He could be a bit intense, but Bucky was such a good guy. He deserved happiness. Now, he was a 40 year old single successful actor slash slash with no family to speak of but you.

“Ready to roll?” 

Bucky’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

You blinked, taking a step back into the moment. You smoothed your pencil skirt down your hips, which were wider now than they were 20 years earlier. You wondered what production would think of you at 35, no surgical augmentation, just naturally you in a sea of plastic.

Bucky was the same way, his dark hair and beard peppered with gray and crows feet framing his striking eyes. But on him they were ‘sexy.’

Women were held to a different standard.

You missed Bucky appreciating your curves and your looks as you bit your lip and looked up at him with those big eyes.

Bucky’s heart clenched when you smiled at him. So fucking beautiful.

“Yeah. Let’s make magic, ” you murmured.

Bucky was a goner. 

He loved your voice since you developed the lower register of your tone. It was one thing that the critics and fans raved over in anything you did.

He chuckled at how you’d trashed his trailer when he’d tried to hide your cigarettes from you that one time. It was all for naught, since you quit 18 months after you started. 

He didn’t know that you’d just done it to hang out with him outside the soundstage door, stealing time. But it had permanently changed your voice into something that cemented your icon status in the present day, despite your limited career.

Bucky grinned that boyish grin, the same one he’d flashed a thousand times when you were on set together all those years ago. It made your heart do that little flip it always did, despite everything.

You had a meeting with the studio execs to discuss the next project, a reboot of the very series you'd starred in all those years ago, Idol’s Ridge.

It was too perfect, too full of nostalgia. But it also felt strange.

You glanced over at Bucky as he started talking to the execs. He was charismatic, confident, everything he had always been. But there was something in the way he kept glancing at you. His eyes were more intense, more aware of your every movement. 

It was unsettling, especially the premise he pitched. 

You finished up with the execs and stepped outside the back entrance for a quick break and Bucky lit up a cigarette, something you hadn’t seen him do in years. 

“You’re quiet today,” he said, leaning against the wall. You inwardly railed at him smoking again, but he was grown. You watched the smoke curl around him through narrowed eyes. Then you grabbed the cigarette from his fingers and took a drag.

“Don’t do that, Star…”

You raised an eyebrow at him and then inhaled, Bucky watching you closely. Too closely, you might have thought if you noticed the way he watched your mouth after you removed the cigarette.

Bucky put the cancer stick in his own mouth and closed his eyes as he took his own drag, tongue chasing the filter as he removed it to exhale. He peered at you through the smoke, licked his lips and then dropped the half smoked bone on the ground, extinguishing it with the sole of his brown Ferragamo.

“We quit.”

You laughed and leaned on the stucco wall with your hand, staring up at him while he smiled down at you. This was your thing, this unspoken language that was understood but not explicit.

You worked together, but it was always more than that. 

You were waiting for him to speak, but Bucky could always wait you out.

“James.”

You punched him on the arm. Hard. 

“Ow!”

He laughed and rubbed his arm as he looked down at his shoes, smiling.

“You can do it, Star. I believe in you.”

You rolled your eyes at the old nickname. He always told you that you were the brightest little star on the set. 

“But Bucky…”

You thought you lost it when Steve disappeared. But you couldn’t lose that feeling, so you took small roles, just to have permission to be someone else for a time.

Your films were critically acclaimed, but your confidence was shot.

“You can do it.”

You appraised Bucky. Something had shifted. Maybe it was the project, or maybe it was something more. Bucky looked right back at you, his expression softening. 

“Are you in or are you out, Star?”

“I’m in,” you said, your voice steady and sure.

He tilted his head, studying you. 

“Good. Because I need you.”

“You’ve always needed me,” you said, half-joking, half serious.

Bucky chuckled. 

“Yeah, well, this time it’s different.”

You could feel your heart pounding. He was looking at you like he’d never looked at you before. Like he was really seeing you. But you were reading too much into things again.

You took a deep breath.

“You know, I’ve always trusted you, right? With everything. You’re the only person I’ve never felt like I had to pretend with.”

You took his hand and Bucky looked down at you tangling your fingers with his. 

He should tell you. 

“I know, Buck. You’re my best friend.”

There it was. The friend zone. Bucky sighed, but held on to your hand.

“Although we didn’t talk about that one plot point.”

You released his hand and crossed your arms, pushing your breasts up in your sweater. Not that Bucky noticed that sort of thing.

Bucky looked at you, one eye closed, squinting from the LA sunlight. Or was it because you were so gorgeous? 

To you, his glance felt loaded, like there was something you couldn’t ignore anymore. But of course you tried.

“Which one?”

You smiled at his evasion.

“You know. The one where our characters are married now?”

Bucky smirked.

“We discussed this being centered around the children of the cast from 20 years ago.”

You huffed, frustrated.

“Yes, Bucky, but our characters were never a thing.”

He stood up and walked two steps toward you, into your space.

“Not true. Sophie always had a crush on Jack, but he blew you off. It’s 20 years later, he’s grown up and finally appreciates the beautiful woman who was always right there in front of him.”

You looked up into his clear blue gaze and had a scorching comeback for him.

“Oh.”

He reached for your face, palm resting on your cheek, thumb brushing at the side of your nose.

“Hold up…” 

Bucky moved even closer and brought his face close to yours, warm menthol breath hovering over your own. He pulled his hand back and looked at it, showing it to you briefly. You didn’t see anything.

“Eyelash.”

He opened the door and held it for you as you tried to get your soul back into your body.

“Break time is over.”

—--

The next hours were a blur.

The production meeting went long as you brainstormed for the reboot, and you and Bucky worked seamlessly together, bouncing ideas off each other and firing on all cylinders. The dynamic was amazing and reignited your old crush.

You went to Bucky’s LA home after the meeting, excited at the preliminary greenlight for the project. You both decided to work on an outline that weekend to deliver to the studio Monday morning.

You’d gone home to pack a bag and get your essentials, as Bucky said you could bunk in one of his guest rooms. 

It would be like a sleepover with one of your girlfriends, sweet, innocent and fun.

But after eating takeout tacos from Leo’s, you got to work in Bucky’s home office, and the vibe was thriving, but different. Every time your hands brushed as you passed papers or exchanged a glance, it was electric.

The air arced between you, but you couldn't tell if it was just you, or if Bucky felt it too. 

As you sat looking at the whiteboard with the preliminary outline of the pilot episode, Bucky leaned back in his chair and regarded it, a smirk playing at the edge of his lips.

“This shit is fucking brilliant. It’s going to be better than the original.” 

You looked at him, excitement coursing through you. You smiled at him and got up to walk behind his chair to lean on it and admire your ideas, as if you could see better what he meant from his perspective.

“I can’t believe it’s really happening.” 

You leaned down and whispered in his ear, afraid to voice it too loud. Bucky swiveled around in his chair to look at you. You were still in your outfit from this morning, too excited when you pack to change into something more comfortable. You looked gorgeous. 

He stood up and grabbed your hands in his.

“Better believe it, Star, we’re going to do this thing big.”

You squeezed his hands back and looked up into his beautiful blue eyes. Bucky’s hands were on your arms now and he was drawing you closer.

“Couldn’t do this without you, Star. I love… working with you.”

Your stomach flipped as he murmured at you. You inhaled the spice of his cologne and savored his touch while listening to his voice.

But your stomach dropped when you heard the ‘L’ word and you didn’t know what happened; just like Sophie and Jack all those years ago, you didn’t know what came over you when you pressed your lips to Bucky’s.

You had every intention of ending the contact before it began, but Bucky’s hands were now in your hair and tugged you close. He turned and lifted you onto his desk, stepping between your thighs, pressing them wide enough so that your skirt fought the movement.

It only made everything hotter. 

Bucky used his hold on your hair to tilt your head so he could kiss down your neck. You arched your back, needing his mouth all over you, needing him to rip you out of the clothes that had the nerve to create a barrier between you. 

For some unknown reason to your cunt, words emerged from your lips,

“We shouldn’t.” 

“Why not?” 

He pushed your cardigan off your shoulders and nudged your tank top lower so that he could mouth at your cleavage. Your panties flooded with wetness. 

“We’re both grown, Star.” 

The acknowledgement in Bucky’s rumbling voice sent a bolt of pleasure straight to your core. He skated his hands up your thighs, pushing your skirt higher until you had to lift your hips to allow it to bunch around your waist. He fingered along the edges of your panties. 

He looked down.

“Black lace. Fuck.” 

He cursed low enough that you had to strain to hear him. He licked his lips, his saliva making them look so delicious. 

“Can I touch you, Starlight?”

You shivered at the nickname and nodded, breath caught in your throat.

“Need your words, Baby. Need that beautiful voice.”

“Yes, Bucky. Please touch me…”

Bucky’s fingertips traced your clit through the fabric. 

“Fuck, I’ve wanted you.” 

“Me too,” you whispered, and he met your gaze, which threatened to stop his heart. 

His blue eyes were fire, bright enough to make your whole world glow. If you let him, he’d sweep you away and ensure you enjoyed every second. You wanted it. To be swept away by him. 

Bucky started the torturous slide of his thumb over your clit. You threw your head back and whined, caught up in a nirvana you’d only dreamt about.

“Bucky! Dont…”

He stopped what he was doing, stilling his hand over your cunt.

“Don’t?” 

His voice was broken, and pleading. You used your free hand to cover his where he cupped your pussy. 

“...Don’t stop Bucky….” 

Still he didn’t move, searching your face for answers you didn’t have. You drew in a shuddering breath. Bucky’s slow smile sent your stomach into a dizzying flip. 

“Naughty girl. You want to use me for your pleasure. Your own personal sex toy.” 

You dragged your gaze over him, from his dark hair, to those wicked blue eyes, to his sinful mouth, down to the pants clearly sporting a huge hard-on. You grew bold in the knowledge that he’d started this. 

Bucky Barnes wanted you, too.

“I have a sex toy. In fact, I have several. None of them look a thing like you.” 

His laughter rolled through you. 

“I guess I have work to do. Need to retire some sex toys. Check.” 

“You’ll have to work real hard. I’m kind of attached to them, especially Arthur. Haven’t had real cock in 2 years.”

Bucky arched his eyebrow and hooked his fingers through your panties and dragged them down your legs, stepping back so you could kick them off. 

“I’m disturbed that you named your vibrator.”

“Dildo,” you corrected.

He chuckled and shook his head.

“But I’m up for the challenge of making you scream my name…”

Bucky went to his knees between your spread thighs, looking at your pussy so intensely you could feel it like his touch. 

“And I won’t tell you that I’ve jacked myself to the thought of you countless times over the years.” 

“Bucky…”

He pressed a painfully gentle kiss to each thigh and then his breath ghosted over your clit. 

“I sure as hell won’t tell you that when I fucked my hand, and imagined being inside you, that I came so fucking hard, Star, just from thinking about being buried in you to the hilt.”

You tried to focus past the pleasure of his mouth, his big hands holding your thighs wide as he devoured you. But his words had you floating.

“I… You fantasized about me?” 

Bucky licked up your slit and then kissed it, looking up in your eyes before he answered you.

“Hmmm. Yes. I did.” 

He sucked on your clit hard enough to make your back bow. 

“Eating you out...” 

Another long lick and a smile that he was accomplishing that very thing. 

“You on your knees for me...” 

The image in your mind of looking up at Bucky made you clench down and Bucky smiled at your pitiful pussy.

“...Bending you over something, like this desk, and fucking you hard…”

You whimpered, your pleasure building as much from the fantasy as from Bucky’s mouth. 

“... Maybe taking that ass…”

He rolled his tongue over your clit, working you in just the way you needed. 

“....cuming inside you, or all over your back. I’ll let you choose.”

“Oh! Bucky!”

You were practically screaming as you tried to slow your pleasure, to make it last, but Bucky drove you to the brink and you couldn’t resist him. You came with a cry that filled the room around you.

Bucky didn’t give you a chance to recover, though. He stood and stepped back between your thighs to take your mouth. You tasted yourself on his tongue and it made your toes curl. 

You wrapped your legs around his waist and he lifted you off the desk easily and walked you down the hallway, still kissing you, never missing a step. 

“You’ve done this before,” you murmured. 

“Not like this. Never this.” 

He kept you pinned to him with one arm around the small of your back and used his other hand to pull your tank top off. You ran your hands down his muscled chest. He really was too beautiful. It almost hurt to look at him and touching him only magnified the sensation. 

He spun and pinned you between his body and the wall next to the door, thrusting against you. The seam of his pants pressed against your clit and you cried out. 

“More.” 

Bucky dragged his mouth up your neck and set his teeth against your earlobe and that set you on fire.

“You’re so needy, Star. I get it, I really do. Been wanting to show you how I feel for 14 years…” 

You gasped and Bucky’s teeth scraped against your lip, making your nipples tighten in response. He let you down and stepped back, running his hand through his hair.

“Strip.”

There wasn’t much left to take off, but you obeyed and his grin made your heart stutter. 

“On the bed.” 

You crawled on the mattress and reclined among the pillows. You were rewarded by Bucky stripping out of shirt, and his pants and underwear in one go, shoving the material down his strong thighs and kicking free of them, leaving him naked. 

The sight of his large cock straining against his stomach had you biting your bottom lip.

You knew what came next.

You craved it. And you forgot all about Arthur. You reached for him. 

“Don’t make me wait any more, Bucky.” 

He pulled a string of condoms from the nightstand and tossed them on the bed next to you. You counted six and raised your eyebrows. Bucky gave you an unrepentant grin.

“One condition.” 

“Damn it, Bucky.” 

Of course there were conditions. 

“Stay in my bed tonight. Another fantasy of mine.” 

You melted. Why not? It was finally time to have what you wanted. And you wanted Bucky.

You met those intoxicating blue eyes and nodded. 

“Yes.” 

“Thank fuck.” 

He was on you in seconds, shoving your legs wide and he ground the base of his cock against your clit. He tangled his fingers in your hair and took your mouth like you were the sweetest fruit and he’d never get enough. 

You reached blindly over and grabbed a condom. You tore the wrapper with your teeth and you rolled it over his cock. He allowed it, shifting back to give you the room to work.

Your body cried for him; you needed him inside you and you needed it at that moment. You lay back and  guided him into you and he thrust in slowly, inch by inch, until he had sheathed himself completely. 

Oh god. The stretch. Bucky broke free of your mouth and pressed his forehead against yours, your breath mingling between you. 

Each of your exhales came out as, “Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.” 

He gentled his touch, stroking your hair as if you were a wild animal he was taming. 

“Stay with me, Starlight. I’ve got you.” 

As if this was something that was forced upon you, rather than what you grabbed with greedy hands because you wanted it so badly. 

You smiled, blissful. Fucked out, enjoying the feeling of Bucky’s cock pouding inside you. You needed more.

“Please move, friend. Fuck me, Bucky.” 

You hitched your leg around his hip so you could take him deeper and leaned up until your lips brushed his ear.

“I need it hard.” 

Bucky squeezed his eyes together and bit his lip as the pounding of his cock increased. You both thought he would cum right then.

“‘M not your fucking friend…”

He pulled out and flipped you onto your stomach, pulling your hips up even as he impaled you again. 

“You want me to fuck you hard?” 

“Yes!” you moaned. 

“Knees wider, Starlight. Let’s go.”

Bucky slapped your ass and then grabbed a handful of your thick hair, tugging at just the right amount of pain to go with the pleasure.

The first stroke was slow.

“Fuck, you’re gripping me like a fucking vice. Almost had me cumming a few minutes ago.”

You could tell that Bucky’s teeth were gritted when he spoke. He had to brace against the urge to rut into you like a wild animal, but his pace and intensity increased. 

For long, mind-blowing minutes, he thrust into you, paying attention to your sounds and movements to know that he was hitting that spot inside you. You meet him thrust for thrust as Bucky began to fuck you like his life depended on it.

He made the mistake of looking down at how your ass took the shock waves of his back shots and the evidence of your arousal left on his cock as he pistoned inside you and he cursed.

“Fucckkkkk! You should see the beautiful cream you’re leaving on my cock, Star. So fucking hot.”

The way you moaned set him on the road to orgasm and again and he reached for your clit, rubbing his thumb over it. Almost as soon as he did, you screamed his name and shattered beneath him. Bucky followed you headlong over that cliff and collapsed beside you, dizzy.

He looked over to see you already falling asleep, exhausted. He kissed your temple and went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom, coming back with a washcloth for you.

When he was done cleaning you up, he gathered your boneless body in his arms, pressing kisses to your forehead as you curled into him, your head on his chest and leg thrown over his. 

It was like you didn’t want to let him go.

“I know the feeling, Star,” Bucky whispered as he closed his eyes.

A feeling settling in his chest that he’d almost, but not quite, ever felt before.

—-

Read Fade to Love II

[hihomeghere]

Carousel Club | Five Hargreeves / Reader

Word Count : 3k Summary : After being dropped into 1963, you find work at the Carousel Club as a dancer. While following a tip where Luther could be, Five sees your routine. Overwhelmed by jealousy he sneaks into your dressing room. (I do not own the umbrella academy or any of it's characters.) Warnings/Tags : Smut, cursing, piv, men being sexist (its the 1960s what do you expect?) dom!Five, Aged up!Five. A little bit of angst. Not requested.

You always trusted your husband. He was your constant in a very fucked up world. You knew he would never purposely harm you, or put you in harm's way. Sometimes that meant following him through time and space, other times it meant trusting him to not burn your dinner. So when he said he had a way out of the mess you and your in-laws had caused, of course you trusted him wholeheartedly. 

You grasped Five’s hand tightly in your own, feeling a sense of deja-vu from the last time you two tried to spacial jump. Diego gingerly held your other hand, you looked up at him giving him a curt nod. He returned the nod before looking around at the rest of his siblings. You raised your eyes to the gaping hole in the ceiling, the intricate details of the theater framing the crumbling moon. Five squeezed your hand, drawing your attention back to him. You gave him a reassuring smile, well as reassuring as you could.

Electricity crackled around the seven of you, wind whipping your hair in front of your face. Five’s grip on your hand was almost crushing, like you were his lifeline. A giant blue orb of energy appeared above your family, growing and glowing. Five strained under the pressure, his face contorting into a pained expression. The blue light enveloped you all, flickering and pulsing. 

“Hold on! It’s gonna get messy!” Five yelled as the ground shook beneath you, shutting your eyes tightly you felt yourself being pulled away from Five and Diego. You only had a moment of panic before you were thrown to the ground.

You groaned sitting up, the blue light of energy blinding you. You raised your hand shielding your eyes.

“Five!” You yelled as you got to your feet. As fleeting as the orb had appeared it disappeared, as though someone had turned an old tv off. Was that a flash, or just your imagination? You shook your head, taking in your surroundings. No Five, no siblings, no briefcase. Where the hell were you? 

You wandered down the alleyway to the main street. Your hip twinged in pain after taking the brunt of your fall. You looked around the street, the lampposts and storefront neon signs were your only light source. You sank down on a bench, letting out a deep sigh. Your eyes wandered to a newsrack, you quickly got to your feet. You ran to it, holding the sides of the glass case. 

August 1st, 1963. Dallas, Texas.

Your heart leapt into your throat. Damn it, Five. Shit, Alison. God, where were the rest of Five’s siblings?

“Honey, are you alright?” A soft voice asked, you turned your head sharply. You were met by a sweet woman’s face, big blond hair and bangs. She had a cardigan wrapped tightly around herself as she reached out to touch your shoulder. You shook your head, still coming to terms with the last five minutes. “Come on, I’m just about to go get something to eat, why don’t you join me?” She said, smiling sweetly.

“I-” You cleared your throat, “I don’t have any money.” You said, shaking your head. “Well then my treat.” She said helping you to your feet. You followed the woman down the streets of Dallas to a quaint diner. You sat down across from her, taking a look over the menu. People chattered mindlessly around you as you came to terms with your situation.

“I’ve seen that look before.” She said, setting her menu down on the table. 

“What look?” You said furrowing your eyebrows.

“That look. Every girl I work with has had that same look.” She huffed thanking the waiter as he set down a coffee cup in front of her. “Small girl in the big city, not knowing where you’re gonna stay or what you’re gonna eat. Believe me, I’ve seen that look before because I’ve felt that before.” She said reaching across the table, taking your hand in hers. “So what’s your story, sweetheart?” You took a breath, choosing your next words carefully.

“My husband and I got separated.” You whispered, “My parents didn’t agree with our marriage and so we ran away. He was supposed to meet me here in Dallas but he didn’t show.” You said, not technically a lie, Five was supposed to be here with you.

“Oh dear,” She tsked, “well you do not have to worry about that anymore. I’m so glad I found you! You can stay with me until you get back on your feet.” You smiled, hopefully Five wouldn’t make you wait much longer. 

“Thank you…” You trailed off, realizing you hadn’t caught her name.

“Autumn.” She answered, holding out her hand for you to shake.

“I’m Y/n.” You smiled, taking her hand.

“You know Y/n, I could put in a good word for you with my boss. He may seem a bit rough around the edges, but we’re always short staffed.” She shrugged. Whatever the job was you would only have it for hopefully a week tops before Five caught up with you, along with his siblings.

“I appreciate it Autumn.” You smiled, patting her hand.

-

When you arrived at Autumn's place of work you wondered if you were a little over your head. You followed Autumn into the back entrance of the nightclub. You passed by many half dressed women, putting on their makeup and outfits. 

“This way sweetheart!” Autumn called, you picked up your pace following her through the dressing room. Once on the main floor of the club you were greeted by the intense smell of cigars. Autumn had all but disappeared, you wandered through the tables. Trying to work your way to the front of the club, while also trying to avoid the men’s wandering hands at the tables. 

“Y/n!” She called from a table, you turned your head. The club was familiar, but you couldn’t put your finger on it. You were face to face with Jack Ruby, the man who would put the hit out on Lee Harvey Oswald. You gulped, straightening your shoulders you walked over to them.

“Mr. Ruby, this is Y/n she’s looking for a job.” Autumn said, clasping her hands together. Jack looked you over, a cigar dangling from his lips. 

“Y/n who?” He said leaning back in his chair. You stuttered but only for a second.

“Y/n L/n,” You said with a smile, Hargreeves might get Five or your in-laws in trouble if anyone here caught wind of that name. He puffed his cigar, leaning over to whisper something to the man next to him. He chuckled before nodding, you bit your cheek. Feeling like a piece of meat in front of these men.

“Can you start tonight?” He said, lacing his fingers together. 

“Of course.” You replied, Autumn cheered quietly beside Mr. Ruby.

“Autumn, be a dear and show her the dressing rooms. Tell ‘em I want Miss Y/n to be on stage by tomorrow night.” He said motioning with his cigar in hand. On stage? You turned sharply looking toward the stage of the nightclub, scantily clad women fanning themselves with large feather fans. 

“Yes sir Mr. Ruby!” Autumn giggled, taking your arm and walking you towards the back.

-

You sat in front of your vanity, lined by bright golden bulbs. Brushing glitter onto your eyes before adding your long eyelashes. It had been three months since you had taken on your new job, along the way you had made many friends. You felt for all the girls alongside you, it was a rough profession but it paid well. You pulled your robe close around your body, walking over to the clothing rack. You rifled through the sheer jeweled fabric before your eyes landed on the black and white body suit. You threw your outfit over your arm heading back to your vanity. You were greeted by a beautiful bouquet of red roses, Autumn standing next to them with a coy smile.

“Autumn! Who are these from?”

“A secret admirer,” she cooed her bright red lips pulling back into a smile, “Just teasing! It’s from all of us girls here,” She said as she rushed forward, wrapping her arms around your shoulders. Her cheap perfume floods your senses along with her sweet sweat.

“Y’all didn’t have to do that!” You smiled as she pulled away, she only waved you off.

“You’re one of the best here! Don’t know where you learned all your little tricks.” She said bumping your elbow with her own. She looked down at your costume in your arms. “Need help?” Autumn asked, holding out her hand. 

“Yes please.” You said handing her your suit as you lowered your robe. You held onto her shoulders stepping into the suit, you adjusted your straps as Autumn tightened your corset. You admired yourself in the mirror, since taking on your new job you had become more toned. More than when you had worked at the commission, and these clothes were definitely more flattering than your blue suits you used to wear. You took in a sharp breath as Autumn pulled through the last loops, tying the ribbon with a neat bow.

“Alright sister, you’re ready.” She said squeezing your shoulders.

“Thanks Autumn, now go take your break!” You said waving her off. 

“Y/n! You’re on next!” Shannon called from the stage door. You nodded, quickly stopping to smell the sweet scent of your roses before grabbing your tulle skirt. You tied it around your waist as you walked backstage. You picked up your red feather fans, taking a deep breath. You walked up to the closed red curtains listening to the deafening cheers and whistles. You heard the clink of the ropes being pulled back before you were blinded by the spotlights. You closed your eyes, bowing your head, your body covered by the bright red fans. 

You started your routine, swaying your hips seductively as you pulled the fans back away from your body teasing the audience. You lost yourself in the music, thankfully it was difficult to decipher anyone’s face over the shadows cast by the spotlights. You unclipped the tulle skirt, throwing it off stage. You could make out a certain group of sailors, and a rather large man standing by the bar. 

You teased the audience, covering your body with the fans before flashing them a glimpse of your shimmering body suit. You pulled the fans over your head, rotating your hips in a circular motion as you lowered into a squat. You bounced on your heels before jumping back up to your feet. You smirked as the men whistled and cheered. 

The music slowed, and faded out as you walked behind the red curtain. You dropped off your fans before heading back to your dressing room. You opened the door, shutting it behind you. 

“Who sent the roses?” Five’s voice sent a shiver down your spine. You turned your head sharply, meeting Five’s predatory gaze.

“Five!” You gasped, your heart soaring in your chest. “When did you get here?” 

“I could ask you the same thing.” He said, crossing his arms. Your smile fell off your face, what was his problem? It’s not your fault that he dropped you off in the middle of 1963 with no resources. 

“Three months ago.” You said furrowing your brows, “I’ve been looking for you this whole time!” He scoffed, clicking his tongue.

“Oh really? It looks like you’ve been getting enough attention without me.” He huffed, glaring at the bouquet of roses.

“Excuse me for finding a way to survive here.” You spit pushing past him, knocking his shoulder against yours. You took a seat in front of your vanity, pulling out your makeup kit. He stalked up behind you, towering over you. He gripped your chin, forcing you to look at him through the mirror, effectively smearing your bright red lipstick.

“You’re mine.” He sneered, his lips pulling back over his teeth. You flushed, heat pooling in your core. You stared up at him through the mirror, his fingers squeezing your lips together. “Got it?” He asked. You glared at him, a devilish thought entering your mind. 

You kept quiet, smirking as you watched a shadow pass over his features. He clenched his jaw, shaking his head as he tilted your head to look him in the eye.

“You must need a lesson.” He smirked, pulling you to your feet, you stumbled slightly in your heels. He kicked the chair away, you jumped as it thudded against the carpeted floor. His arm moved behind you, sweeping everything off of your vanity along with the roses. They crashed to the floor, the vase shattering. He pushed you against the vanity, caging you in with his arms as he slammed his hands against the mirror. He stared down at you with a wolfish grin, you felt yourself flush. Your heart started to beat faster as you squirmed under him.

“Yes sir.” You said tilting your chin up, staring at him through your lashes. He growled spinning you around, your hands splayed out in front of you on the top of the vanity. His hand connected to your ass cheek, letting out a low chuckle as you gasped. He moved your hair off of your back, his cold fingers attacking the strings of your corset. 

“Stupid- fucking- ribbon-“ he said through gritted teeth, you caught the slightly crazed look in his eye through the reflection. Your body felt on fire, three months without him made every touch that more exhilarating. As soon as the corset was loose enough he was ripping it off of your body, along with your panties. You were entirely bare in front of your fully dressed husband. He stepped back, loosening his tie as he watched you squirm in the mirror. 

“Not so confident now, dearest.” He smirked, unbuttoning the top button of his dress shirt. You breathed hard, adrenaline rushing through your veins. Your nipples hardened against the cold air in the dressing room. You heard the familiar metal on metal as he took off his belt before unzipping his pants. He walked up behind you, nosing his dick against your folds. You clenched around nothing, pushing back against him. His hand came up to the back of your skull, wrapping his fist through your hair. He stared at you through his darkened gaze, you were breathless, your lips parting slightly.

“Please,” you whined, batting your eyelashes. He forcibly thrusted all the way in, knocking the breath out of your lungs. You let out a pornagraphic moan before you covered your mouth with your hand. He grabbed your hand, pulling it away from your mouth and holding it behind your back.

“Why don’t you let everyone here know who you belong to?” He huffed in your ear, thrusting erratically into you. You gripped the desk, the only thing holding you up as Five plowed into you. “Let them know that I’m the only one who gets to fuck you like this.” You clenched around him as his words seemed to straight directly to your core. He let out a groan, loosening his grip on your hair. “Fuck you like this don’t you?” You nodded enthusiastically, your eyes rolling back into your head as his cock prodded against your g-spot.

“Yes, yes Five!” You babbled tears pricking your eyes, as he bent you over the desk. His hands flew to your hips, pulling them against his own thrusts. You could only lay there as your orgasm came crashing down. You were thankful you were on top of the vanity because there was no way your trembling legs would have been able to hold you up. 

Five’s eyebrows knit together as he arched his neck back, his hips stuttering as his orgasm quickly followed yours. Cumming with a loud shout he collapsed on top of you, your sweat causing his thin shirt to stick to your skin. He pulsed inside of you as he gingerly tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. He pulled away, peeling himself off of you. He kissed your shoulder as his softened cock slipped out of you. Your breathing was slowly coming back to normal as he tried to return your room to the state it was before he had destroyed it and you. He picked up your robe draping it over your shoulders. You sat up, feeling his cum start to drip down your thighs.

“What took you so long?” You asked, tying your robe close around your naked body.

“I just got here.” He sighed, tucking himself back into his pants. “I’m sorry I made you wait.” He turned to you, brushing his thumb over your cheek.

“I’ll always wait for you.” You sighed, wrapping your arms around his waist. He held you against his chest, resting his cheek against yours.

“At least someone will, Luther and Diego weren’t too happy about me dumping them in the past.” Five sighed. Diego and Luther were here, too?

“Where are they?” You asked, turning to Five with wide eyes. Five looked at you inquisitively, a small smile pulling on the corner of his mouth.

“Luther works for Jack Ruby, y/n. I found him in this club before I knew you worked here.” Your stomach dropped. Luther worked for Jack Ruby? That means he must have seen your numbers.

“Oh god.” You said mortified, hanging your head against Five’s chest. He chuckled, shaking his head as he lightly rubbed your back.

“Believe me, he was just as mortified as you are.” He said, “Although I must say I thoroughly enjoyed your routine.” He lowered his voice, his hands trailing down your body to rest on your butt.

“I think I could give you a private showing.” You smirked, wrapping your hand around his tie. You pulled him forward by his tie, smashing your lips against his. His hands gripped your hips, the velvety fabric smooth against his palms. 

“God I’d love that,” He let out a sigh, “but maybe we should wait until after we save the world.” 

Again? It was happening again?

“Vanya?” You asked, pulling away.

“Your guess is as good as mine.” He shrugged, “All I know is on November 25th the world ends, again.” 

“Guess it’s time for a family reunion.”

[prodbymaui]

Oops, Baby (I Love You) — 정재현.

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover

PAIRING: jeong jaehyun x reader

GENRE: modern royalty ; arranged marriage

WORD COUNT: 12.5k+ words

WARNINGS: heavy alcohol consumption, mentions of sleeping pills, food play, oral sex, dirty talks. (the whole fic is romcom slash very fluffy, the only nasty thing here is the smut scene)

SYNOPSIS: you had been living your life as a rebellious and controversial crown princess, now you must face the consequence of purifying your tainted image; marrying the gentle and infamous crown prince of South Korea.

PLAYLIST: Do you hear my heart?

A/N: after weeks of depression episodes what do you call them), I finally got the strength to finish this bad bitch lmao. I know you guys have been waiting so I hope you'll leave your thoughts after? anyways, happy reading!

Everything is spinning and everyone is either two or three. You don't know how much alcohol you've drank but certainly it was enough for you to stumble your way out of the bar, looking for somewhere to puke your guts out.

The intense nausea is already too much for your fucked up body system to accommodate, but the gods and deities thought it's not enough and it'll be perfect if you trip continuously on your Celine Truffle Pointed Heels, possibly damaging it more than you've done to your other shoes. The mask to hide your face is not helping as well.

Someone bumps your side and due to your drunken state, you lose your balance and break one of the heels, sending you to dive to your side. Your eyes shut close as you brace yourself for a painful slam but it never comes. Instead you meet a firm chest hidden underneath a black dress shirt and 2 layers of silver necklaces.

Looking up, through your hazy vision, you see pursed lips and palms up, as if avoiding touching you anywhere. As you step to regain your balance, you trip once again and like a deja vu, the man only lets you use his shoulders and chest to support yourself but never lets his hands touch you.

''You might want to get off of me, Ms…?''

Hearing that voice, a strange sense of familiarity and longing surge to your heart, engulfing it and squeezing it. As if to say, remember it.

''...heart.'' Why is my heart aching?

The man pulls away and observes you, sighing. He clears his throat. ''Sorry, Heart.''

His figure walking away is the last thing you see before your vision blacks out with no guarantee of you being able to recall the events that took place tonight.

Utmost disappointment. Series of distasteful comments. Disapproving reactions. Surely, these aren't the usual feelings of the people towards the soon-to-be-queen of their country but it has been the weekly routine for the people of yours to criticize their sole princess.

''Strip her off the royal titles–! Are these people out of their mind?!'' Your squeal that comes close to a banshee rings across the whole entirety of the bedroom.

''Excuse them, they take after their princess.'' Hiding her giggles behind a fist, Winter scrambles off the bed as you aim to strangle her fragile neck.

Barely dodging your deathly grips by an inch, Winter's yelps bounces off the walls continuously, followed by your irritated shrieks and threatening hands ready to crush your best friend. The chase eventually dies down with the two of you panting, catching your breaths. You pull her short brown locks one last time before jumping on the bed, face down. Winter does the same and lands next to you, arms draping over each other.

A knock disrupts the peaceful atmosphere that engulfs the room, pulling you out of your slumber trance. You knew the pattern of the knock too well. It is practiced by all royal staff to ensure politeness and great manners whenever they are surrounded by royalties and VIPs. Included in training  as per the Queen's request.

The door opens and it reveals a female servant. This one's not yours, judging by the blue brooch. ''Good evening, Your Highness. Ms. Kang wishes to see you in her office right now and orders me to fetch you.''

''And why is that?''

''She said nothing, Ma'am.''

That earns a boisterous laugh from your best friend, alongside a series of claps. ''Goodluck on hearing an hour of scolding, girl.''

Winter sends you a 'fighting' gesture. You give her your middle finger.

The trip to the advisor's office takes a few minutes as the private chambers of the royal members are at the east wing while gatherings, some royal duties, and part where it is open for the public are dealt with at the west side of the palace. You're still not mentally prepared when the wooden entrance makes its way for you. As your eyes meet the pair of the royal advisor, you know you should've prepared yourself much better.

''Good evening, Your Highness. Please do take a seat.''

Albeit it's probably showing on the courtesy of your eyebrows, you still cover your scoff with a cough under your breath. ''Drop the politeness, Eunhye. I don't need it.''

Eunhye removes the newspaper that serves as a hindrance for you to see her expression, and there you spot the disapproving look on her face. You shrug inwardly. What's new? You suppose people in their late 30s are quite uptight. Or it's just your former babysitter.

Kang Eunhye used to play with you a lot during your childhood whenever you and your friends didn't have a playdate. You should've known she was going to take up her late mother's position when Eunhye often disappeared after the death of the former royal advisor. That was when she started changing and became more strict with you.

''You don't need it, you say? Good. Because I don't perceive it as necessary when I tell you Her Majesty had gone haywire by yet another scandal of her sole heir that she asked me to not let you out of the palace if it's not for your studies or royal duties.''

''–what?! That's absurd!''

''Oh I think it's a light punishment for a scandal involving participating in a brawl, breaking the nose of a commoner and almost ending up in jail. Mind you, this happened in front of a controversial bar! And to top it all off, it hasn't been a week since you were caught sleeping in the streets because your drunk ass couldn't help yourself up!''

You scratch your head. ''...well, if the bodyguards came–''

''They would've if you didn't switch clothes with a random woman and make them follow her thinking it was you! Do you know they got suspended and will not receive a portion of their salary because of what YOU did? It's only because of the King that they were spared from getting fired.''

''Not my fault that the guards you hired were fools and easily deceived. They should've recognized my figure even with different clothes.''

''They are bodyguards. Not your devoted fans–,'' Eunhye sighs. ''Your Highness.''

A moment of silence travels along the soundwaves of the room decorated with blue.

''Okay…? What do you want me to do, then? Public appearances? Press conference?''

Eunhye, knowing her ways, will probably advise you to address the issue, apologize for the things that you don't even regret to pacify the netizen. And because they most likely (definitely) won't buy your fake ass apology statement and continue to terrorize you on social media, your schedule will be packed with attending public events to show your 'genuineness'.

You've done this routine more times than the royal court approves so you know what to expect. In fact, you already have a few suggestions ready on which events will possibly dust bits of dirt on your name. You know this like the back of your hand.

The Queen enters. ''No.''

Apparently, you don't..? 

The moment your mother opens her mouth, you feel as if a myriad of buckets of icy water washes over you.

''You will marry a gentleman with a clean image. By then, you will be seen with great influence and garner people's love.''

Once. Twice. You slap yourself three more times but you don't wake up from this nightmare. Winter only looks at you pitifully while chewing her steak.

''Darling, would you please stop hurting yourself?'' A lovable tone is evident from the King's voice, accompanied by a concerned stare.

You sigh but the stabs of your fork through your own steak doesn't stop. ''Marry a gentleman.. I can't fucking believe this.''

''Language.'' The Queen says firmly. ''I apologize for getting ahead of you. I suppose you don't fancy a gentleman?''

''You apologize for assuming my preference but not for taking away my freedom..?''

''Do you wish to marry a lady, then?''

Silence fills the table. You sigh. ''Honestly? Anything would be fine.''

Your mother mums. ''Very well, then. You will be meeting your fianceé in 3 days–''

''–as long as I get to choose who I am marrying.''

''That won't be possible. The person needs to have the most influence and power among your age. The gender will be the only thing we can let you choose.''

''You don't have problems with having a queer princess?''

The Queen frowns. ''Of course, why would we? It is neither a crime nor a sin.''

Your father then nods. ''The royal court fully supports it since two decades ago.''

''But not the 'choosing your own lover'?'' You can only shake your head. You turn to the maid nearby. ''Please bring this to my room, I'll eat there instead.''

Everyone watches you in silence. No one at the table dares to scold you for your behavior.

''She has the rights to be upset this time.'' The King comments.

''Yes, she does.'' The Queen agrees.

Winter warily looks around, pursing her lips as she raises her hand. ''Uhm.. Your Majesty?''

''Yes, Lady Minjeong?''

Winter winces at the mention of her government name. ''As your daughter's best friend, will it be possible for me to know who she'll be marrying?''

Smiling, the King snaps his finger. ''Ah.. let's see if the future lover would pass the best friend's vibe check.''

His husband sends him a curt glance. ''Don't ever try to use generational phrases, it doesn't suit you. Back to Lady Minjeong, yes, it is possible. Would you like to know now?''

''A-already? I thought you're still looking through the profiles?''

''We have tons of staff, Lady Minjeong.''

''Right, I forgot about that.'' Winter sheepishly smiles.

''I'll excuse myself then. I have an appointment with a VIP in an hour, I have to go.'' Just as the husband and wife head towards the exit of the dining hall, the Queen turns. ''It is Prince Jaehyun of South Korea. A good man and the best one for the princess.''

''None on twitter. Nadda on instagram. Nothing on their official website. Heck, there's not even a single picture on google! Does this Prince Jaehyun even exist?'' Winter exclaims as she continues to scroll on her phone.

Frowning, you throw a pillow in her direction. ''Let the others hear your whining and they'll think you have a crush on my soon-to-be-fianceé. Why are you so interested in him?''

''Well, duh! You're literally marrying him, that's enough reason for me to get curious! The question here is why are YOU not interested?''

''I'm more interested in that man at the bar.''

''You should give some! This is the person you'll be spending your life with we're talking about!''

Scoffing, you tug the ends of her hair. ''Will you stop saying I'll marry him? The engagement will be called off sooner than mom and dad can even realize it's coming.''

Winter gasps dramatically and shots up to sit. ''What if it's some old man with a stinky smell and white hair? Oh my god what if Her Majesty agreed to marry you off to some ugly ass 50 year old man for the sake of the country's betterment?!''

Threatening to punch her if she doesn't stop with the overthinking, Winter zips her mouth as she decides to scroll on her phone once again.

You sigh. ''Pretty sure, Mom wouldn't do that, right? I mean she said something about being the best out of the people among our age so..''

''Huh, look at this.''

Winter crawls to you from the part of the she is lying, hands careful not to swipe her screen and risk refreshing the page. You squint your eyes to see.

PANN:

Crown Prince Jaehyun Once Again Stuns The People Of South Korea With His Amazing Visuals.

[ +217, -5 ] It's a shame that we're not allowed to post a photo of him on the internet. How am I supposed to stare at his face for a long time then? How am I supposed to appreciate and share his beauty?

[ +190, -3 ] Daebak! The royal family just visited our village and the rumors weren't lying when they said Prince Jaehyun is handsome ahwksjskww. He's like a walking statue!

[ +165, -20 ] I would die for a man like Prince Jaehyun. Very gentleman and polite. One time, I was with my niece when I met him and the youngest prince in a mall. My niece really wanted the toy car but Prince Jaehyun and Prince Jaemin got the last one before use but they still gave it to my niece.

[ +132, -56 ] Heol ㅋㅋㅋ Of course he would say that, he has an image to keep up! Royalties would try to polish their personalities in public often because they can't afford to lose the trust of the people. It's so fucking dumb how you think the prince acts that way because that just how he is and not because he has an image to take care of.

[ +122, -13 ] The comment above lolol. You're just jealous that the prince has everything you don't; looks, manners, and brains ㅋㅋㅋ

[ +84, -7 ] I don't think Prince Jaehyun does it because people are watching him. I've seen him lecture Prince Jaemin about how he shouldn't expect to get what he wants every time and mind you no one was inside our store that time as our store isn't quite popular so he couldn't be doing it for his image. I feel like Prince Jaehyun is genuine!

[ +65, -5 ] Didn't a lot of people see him wearing clothes with no brands? And that he has a good relationship with the youngest prince? Idk about you but I'd say that speaks a lot about him.

[ +52, -3 ] I've met Prince Jaehyun a lot of times, the only thing I could say is; 'Ultimately Prince-Like'! Handsome and tall, like he's written by Taylor Swift ㅋㅋㅋ. Prince Jaehyun is a dream *three heart emojis*

As you read over the first comment again, the curve on your forehead only deepens. They are not allowed to post a photo of their prince? Then, that would explain the lack of appearance of the royalty everywhere on social media. This pricks your interest. 

''That's a bit.. odd. They forbid any pictures of that prince from getting uploaded.''

''I know right! It's strange. Why would they hide the prince's face if he's truly handsome like the people said?''

You suck the top of your teeth. ''Maybe he's actually ugly and those that say otherwise were paid people. Or probably royal staffs ordered to spread some good words about their prince.''

''Why are you so hell-bent in making him ugly? Can't accept that your parents actually chose someone handsome, rich, and has good personality?''

Shaking your head, you wave your hand dismissively. Oh how you wish you could swipe off that annoying smirk on Winter's face. Is there a rule saying a princess can escape any law including those that involves unaliving a certain daughter of a duke? Hopefully, there is!

If, miraculously, your parents bring that man from the bar to you and arrange him to a marriage with you, maybe then you'll agree to tie up the knot at such a young age. In fact, you might even drop down to your knees and serve him–

The alcohol, or lack thereof, is definitely not good for you.

With the news of your engagement being released plus the anger from the people that is far from dwindling anytime soon, Winter didn't think twice to join you when the idea of getting drunk comes up. There's nothing better than drowning yourself in alcohol after constantly having to deal with the disappointed people of your country.

However, the night is just near getting young when your personal bodyguards dragged you and your best friend out of the bar. It is said that the royal advisor ordered them to do so but your mother was the root. It angered you to the core. They took your freedom of marrying someone you truly love and now, they're depriving you of coping with it as well? How controlling.

Winter was sent home right after both of you got howled back to the royal car. A couple of warnings from the Duke to his daughter and you know something is off. 

Winter's father isn't one to indulge himself in his daughter's vices. Sure, he keeps tabs on her every now and then but the Duke of Boryeong never attempts to control Minjeong as if some kind of robot, lest he suffers from the wrath of Duchess of Boryeong.

You could only wish your own parents did the same. Maybe they will. If you beg for a couple of days in front of the palace while dawning your white hanbok like those korean historical films that Winter likes to watch.

Shutting the car door close, you pass a whisper of 'thank you' to the driver before striding inside the palace. There aren't many people aside from those guarding the entrance which is why you don't find the need to be extra careful on your way. Being free from the shackles of aches caused by your heels is the only thing on your mind.

Just as you turn a corner, straight down the hall that leads to the dining area– you collide with someone. It'll send you a few steps backwards if it's not for the grip on your blazer. Your vision clearing takes a couple of seconds, courtesy of being tipsy from your previous activity.

''Is everything alright?'' A rather soothing yet deep voice asks you, hands already back on his sides.

Your attention diverts to the man that steadies you. Sharp cheekbones in contrast to the soft jawline, almond eyes, and a slightly chapped lips. You wonder if they're naturally pink or the color comes from cosmetic products.

''Your Highness–'' Eunhye appears out of thin air and your bodies separate right as the royal advisor sets her eyes on you. 

Your Highness? Who could this be?

''Ah, I see, you've met each other already. Shall we take this to the dining..? Her Majesty awaits alongside the King and Queen of South Korea.''

No words are exchange between you. Silence fills the air. Clicking of heels appearing every now and then until they reach where your parents and the leaders of South Korea chatters. Everyone stands before their seats at the sight of two crown heirs.

You might be rebellious but no way you're gonna forget the basic manners each person should possess. Doing a brief curtsy, you earn a loving smile from the Queen of South Korea. It radiates warmth and comfort. 

The man beside you does a bow as well that makes his body fold to a 90 degrees. It was too formal for your liking. Too ancient royalty. Too prince-like. So this is what the mysterious prince of South Korea looks like. Somehow, it irks you to the bones.

Gritting your teeth, you sit at the right side of your father after exchanging pleasantries. Each person that occupies the seats of the table starts to dig in as they begin to discuss the matter which you assume is about your issue.

You thought you could go through this dinner in peace until the conversation, courtesy of your mother, diverts to you.

''I've seen the news but it doesn't bother me at all. The princess is merely having fun, just like those around her age do. I, myself, have gone through that phase. '' Queen Miyoung laughs softly. ''The Crown Princess is only at the wrong place, at the wrong time. We used to get in trouble for sneaking out often before as well, isn't that right?''

With the amount of times you've gotten snapped by the paps and you were caught doing shits that is considered inappropriate behavior for a royalty like you— surely, it's not a coincidence anymore. Ever since your first scandal came up, the media that follows your every step doubles. They are always hungry for a headline. And you cannot deny the fact that you're giving them a reason to use you as one.

Your mother reciprocates her friend's chuckles, shaking her head as they recall their memories during when they were your age. Surprisingly, there's a relief inside you. Well, at least the Queen of South Korea doesn't think you're a defect in the royal family.

''I think the wild-like personality of our dear perfectly contrasts the gentle and tame personality of Prince Jaehyun, which is a charming point that the people will eventually love once they got to know about this marriage.'' Your mother adds. 

Balling up your fist, you had to bite the insides of your cheeks to prevent your eyes from rolling.

''Oh absolutely!'' Queen Miyoung places a hand on her son's shoulder, a smile once again appearing on her captivating features. ''My son here is known in our country as someone who is compassionate, emphatic, and humble. Talented on top of that as well!''

Adoration paints your mother's face. ''So I've heard. I feel assured that someone like Prince Jaehyun will be taking care of my daughter.''

''Please, Your Majesty, you can just call me Jaehyun.''

The velvety voice swoons the hearts of the Queen. ''Alright, alright. My heart is beaming at the thought of having you as my son-in-law soon, Jaehyun.''

What the hell? What did this Jaehyun do for him to gain the favor of those around him? Even your father is nodding and smiling in approval as he shares a conversation with this insufferable prince! 

''Humor me, Jaehyun.'' Your father speaks. ''What do you do as a hobby?''

Probably plan how he can convince everyone with that fake ass personality lol.

Jaehyun pats the napkin on his lips before replying. ''Not much, Sir. I indulge myself in music instruments and sometimes, I also sing for fun.''

Did he do his research? That's your father's favorite pastime!

''Ah, singing! If you didn't know, that's one of the things I like the most especially if I'm consumed with boredom.''

Your mother nods. ''Catch him singing while signing papers at his office. Or while feeding our dogs.''

Chuckles blooms on the table.

''Maybe if we have enough time, you could sing for us?'' Your mother suggests as the others agree. 

Jaehyun shakes his head with a fist hiding his smile. ''I'm not great at singing but I'll make sure to prepare once that time comes.''

Acting humble now, eh? He doesn't have to prepare because you'll make sure that time won't come. The skin on your forehead creases even before you could stop it. This is stressing you out more than you anticipated.

Deciding to release your stress on something else, you proceed to harshly cut your Sole Meuniére with the knife prepared by the kitchen staff all the while pursing your lips. Poor innocent Mr. Fish, suffering from the wrath of a princess.

Operation: Stopping the wedding! Step 1, do things that will turn him off. Forking the sea creature's meat, you make sure to chew extra loudly, looking straight at Jaehyun's eyes as you open your mouth every now and then while munching. Surely, anyone would grimace at the sight of chewed fish meat inside one's mouth and at the sound it makes.

Anyone, Prince Jaehyun not included. You slow down the movement of your jaw when the man only sports a brief squint of his eyes before turning away, as if he didn't see the disgusting view you just showed him. Is he not disgusted? Hah! Maybe this is how he actually chews when there's no people around so he's not bothered by it. That's right!

You nod subtly at the voices in your head, gulping the food down when it starts to feel a little weird on your tongue. Reaching for the glass of water, you sip the liquid to tend your throat.

''So about the wedding next week–''

The people gasp, your father standing up from his seat. Series of coughing sounds emit from you as you pat your chest continuously.

''I'm sorry– the water went down the wrong pipe.'' You face towards the other way while massaging your throat, your back getting tapped by your father.

What were they thinking, mentioning that fucking wedding while eating? What if you die from choking? Far-fetched, but you don't cross out the possibilities anyway.

Clearing your throat, you give them a smile after fixing yourself. ''Did I hear it right? The wedding is next week? Isn't that quite fast? We're not chasing a due date here. Plus, we haven't even announced an engagement yet. I'm sure the people will be shocked if I'm suddenly married or engaged in just a matter of days. I suggest prolonging the engagement for– let's say.. a month? I think that would be realistic enough.''

King Jaekyung sends you a grin. ''Dear, your engagement is trending on social media platforms as we speak.''

''W-what?''

You quickly fish out your phone. You don't even have to search either your name or Jaehyun's because an article about your engagement pops up the moment the app loads.

JUST IN: The Crown Princess Revealed To Be Engaged To The Crown Prince of South Korea

After getting involved in numerous issues, the Crown Princess had dropped off the limelight for a few days only to surprise us with an amazing news. According to the exclusive interview held two days ago, Her Highness shyly reveals that the reason for her disappearance on the radar is because a certain man snatches her focus with a shiny ring!

The princess happily shares that she and Prince Jaehyun, Crown Prince of South Korea, have been in a healthy relationship for 4 years now and still going strong. During the early months of dating, the two royalties express their worries about causing an unnecessary ruckus and heartbreaks if they ever go through a break up. According to Her Highness, a stable relationship wasn't exactly guaranteed as they live in different countries and have heavy responsibilities as the future leaders which is why they avoided letting the people know about their romance until they are sure that they can handle the consequences all at once.

''The country had been experiencing some serious issues back then so when Jaehyun and I started to get in touch, we decided not to make it public immediately. Not only were we just starting but we also didn't want to stir another headline if we ever broke up. We were teenagers 4 years ago, we were kids. We know that we are bound to make mistakes but as the future leaders of our countries, adding our childish break up to the countries' problems isn't something that we desire. Thankfully though, our relationship stayed strong and sturdy. There were a few fights here and there, of course, but Jaehyun and I remained understanding with each other. Those years were the reason why I didn't hesitate to say yes when he proposed to me. It was just the two of us, no cameras, no media, no other people. Saying this might be off to some but I was glad that only the both of us got to witness it. As someone who lives in front of the camera and prying eyes, we enjoyed the privacy and intimacy we had during the proposal. We initially didn't plan to have our wedding soon but we figured that there's no point in prolonging what's been a long time coming. Our love kept us intact throughout the years and until now, I could say that I'm still very much and deeply falling in love with him.'' said the Crown Princess.

Furthermore, Prince Jaehyun also shared that one of the reasons that he hid his face was to protect his relationship with his future lover, now Crown Princess. Show more…

''I don't– I don't remember getting interviewed for this...''

The Queen massages your shoulder. ''That's the power of influence, love.''

A shrieking scream jostles Winter in her bed despite being on the other line. Rubbing her ears, Winter felt as if her eardrums got busted just now. She munches on her cookies while she waits for you to be finished with all your screaming and throwing angry punches at the poor teddy bear beside your pillows.

The screeching stops. You look at Winter through the screen of your phone. ''Humor me.''

Eyes boring to you, she didn't stop licking the crumbs that were left on her fingers. ''What is it?''

''Making up stories about my supposed relationship with that man was one thing, but seriously? Telling the whole country I'm still fucking falling in love? Deeply even!''

You hear your bestfriend giggle. ''You think them making everyone think you're smitten with a man is worse than creating fake ass stories about your love life?''

''Well, Isn't it?''

''You're unbelievable.''

''Tell me something I don't know.'' Getting off your bed, you head out of the room. ''Anyways, text you later.'' Blowing her a kiss, the call ended just as you jog down the stairs.

It's been three days since you last saw that prince and those days might be the happiest of your entire life, sans the nags from your mom to get closer with that twat. For a few suns, you've surprisingly experienced peace.

However, it didn't last a long time. It seems like when God precipitated a rain of misfortunes, you were in the middle– swimming in it. Instead of peacefully staying at the palace just like you had always done, you received the news saying you'll move to a place– an apartment. And you received it through waking up one day and seeing them packing your things without even asking your permission. You were asking yourself whether it's real, or it's just a figment of your imagination as sleep still buzzed in your veins.

Now, what's so unfortunate about having your own place? Jeong Jaehyun, is what's unfortunate. You won't forget that infuriating smirk that he sports as he watches you glare at the boxes in the living room, boring holes in them. Complaints start to spill out of your mouth in a whisper despite being in the same space with him in just a matter of an hour.

Dividing the closet and choosing bedrooms is a nightmare. Everyone knows you've got things enough for 3 people, including your heels collection. Storing your possessions requires a big space, but Jeong Jaehyun thought it was a great idea to upped you and place his stupid rubber shoes (or sneakers) collections first without leaving any space for your heels.

Jaehyun stands by the door, leaning on the frame with his arms crossed as he witnesses you turn into some kind of witch, casting different spells, desperate to cast his annoying ass away. It's so comical that it had Jaehyun's shoulder shake as he stifles his laugh. A witch with a collection of heels? Truly, one of a kind.

''Let's split them, Jeong. You take the right side, I'll take the left.''

''No can do.''

''The fuck? Are you expecting me to leave my babies on the floor?''

Jaehyun quirks a brow. ''What's so bad about that? I'm sure your 'babies' will not mind where they are placed, nonetheless.''

''Well, I do!''

The prince turns his heels, but before walking away, he looks at you over his shoulder. ''Learn to take a no, witch.''

''W–what? A fucking what? Hey! Jeong, you jerk– get back here and repeat what you said! Oh you piece of– you did not just say what I heard you said.''

Needless to say, the night ended with you cackling like the devil you are in your room while Jaehyun stays at the kitchen, pressing a cold compress to his skin, hissing. This should go away by tomorrow, or he wouldn't be able to explain how he got a faint mark of slippers on his forehead. Prepare a protective gear if he wants to taunt a witch, Jaehyun notes.

Operation: Stopping the wedding! Step 2, piss the fuck out of him like he does to you.

Being the menace that he is, Jeong made it his daily errand to annoy the hell out of you. His day wouldn't go by without doing things that ticks you off so much you just wish something important would come up in Korea so Jaehyun would be obligated to leave your country and magically stay there for good. 

Example no.1, the cookies you baked for yourself.

''Jeong, where's the cookies?''

''What cookies?''

''The ones in the tray. On the countertop.''

''I don't know no cookies.''

The crumbs on the corner of his lips says otherwise. You waited for half an hour to eat that!

''You– Jeong!!''

Example no.2 followed not long after. You were running late for a hang out with Winter as you couldn't find your today's pick of pair of heels. No, you wouldn't leave this apartment until you find that very pair. Your outfit won't look put together if you wear a different one.

A quarter before 9 PM, you still haven't found the shoes. Did you perhaps leave it at the palace? That couldn't be! You swear you saw it yesterday. Going back and forth to the walk-in closet, living room, and your bedroom– you're this close to tearing your hair apart and turning the whole apartment upside down.

Your phone pings and displays Winter's message. ''Fuuuck, where did I put that?''

Washing your hands over your face, you tilt your head upwards as you let out an exasperated sigh, stomping your feet in annoyance. When you open your eyes, you see the shoes you had been looking for the past 30 minutes. At the ceiling. Where the broken ceiling fan used to be.

How the hell did that even get— You recall seeing Jaehyun standing on a ladder this morning, saying something about fixing the fan.

''JEONG JAEHYUN, YOU FUCKER!!''

Boisterous laughter echoes from the bastard's room.

You still haven't recovered from the heels incident when example no.3 shows itself.

Hammered from drinking all night long after getting your hands on your shoes, you are swaying and tripping as you reach the apartment, slurring your nonsensical words. You don't know how, but you got home safely anyway. A hangover was expected yet it is harsher than you thought it would be.

''Ah fuck..'' You hold your pounding head.

Heading towards the kitchen, you fend your drying throat some water. Washing yourself is not on the list as you change out of your black bodycon dress and fit yourself into an oversized hoodie and sweatpants. You jog out of the building after fighting the urge to throw up the elevator and arrive at the convenience store in no time, your breath that reeks of alcohol be damned.

Picking up a few items for your hangover didn't take long, the cashier is already punching them a few minutes upon your arrival.

''You..''

You bore your eyes to the cashier. ''Yes?''

''...Nothing, Ma'am.'' He then proceeds to tell you the total of what you bought.

There's no further exchange between the two of you after that, so when you get your plastic bag, you walk back to your apartment. As you prepare yourself some cup noodles, you tilt your head, tsking.

Is it just you or the cashier has been giving you some looks? You might be suffering from a headache but pretty sure, you're sober enough to notice the subtle glances the cashier has been giving you. Did you do something stupid again last night? But Eunhye would be calling you first in the morning if you did. Maybe he recognizes your face? The country's princess' face is plastered everywhere. 

''Whatever. Why am I even thinking about it?'' Ever since the engagement, you noticed that you became more cautious in your actions. The streets say the lioness got tamed by a prince. You say you just learned your lesson not to underestimate your mother's punishments.

Staring at your food, your bladder got triggered at the sight of the soup. Peeing what's probably the alcohol in your system, you stand before the sink to wash your hands. And when you look up, you feel an overwhelming surge of emotion.

You are shocked. You are angry. You want to hide yourself from embarrassment. You want to punch the wall. And on top of that, you desire to unalive a royalty, preferably a crown prince that comes from South Korea.

A smile that appears to stretch the ends of your lips. A massive black dot on your nose and cheeks. Two big horns at the top of your eyebrows.

''JEONG JAEHYUN YOU ARE FUCKING DEAD!!''

There were a lot of pranks that Jaehyun had played, with big ones not failing to show up each week. Hiding your charger. Stealing your snacks. Mismatching your socks. And many more that ruin your day so often that the second thing you'd do after waking up is checking for the prank that the prince had done for the day. You are frustrated. And it's not like you to let these kinds of things pass without getting back. This time, you're making sure he'll order to stop the wedding and regret messing with you.

Shuffling in her bed, Winter huffs. ''What do you want?''

''Help me curate a list of the most infuriating pranks.''

Your best friend frowns. ''What for? Are you turning to a kid now? Or perhaps, you're..'' Then she gasps. ''You're carrying a kid?!''

''..The fuck?'' How did she even come up with that conclusion?

''Isn't that what happens when two people who hate each other's guts live under the same roof? Like enemies to lovers!''

You scoff. ''I told you to stop watching kdramas.''

''I'm Korean, duh!'' Winter rolls her eyes. ''Don't forget I'm still upset you took a long time before telling me you literally moved in with your fianceé.''

''Well now you know, and I'm asking for help so I could escape this hellhole.''

''Wait– so you're telling me to suggest pranks in order for you to move out? How does pranking even equals to that?''

Giving her a bored stare, you click your tongue. ''I'll piss the hell of out him, he won't be able to sleep properly at night.''

Winter squeaks. ''You're pranking the prince–?!''

''Yeah, no shit. Who else would it be?''

''Never thought I'd to live the day I'll see you getting on prank wars with your fianceé.''

''Yadda yadda. Just help me with it, please.'' Winter fake gags as she watches you bat your eyes at her.

''Promise me when you get in trouble, my name won't get drag.''

''You're my ride or die, though..''

''...''

''...''

''...Fine.''

''Yay!!''

Jaehyun passes the clock a glance. He's up early so he doesn't have to worry about getting late to his appointment for the day. His footsteps ring from his bedroom, eventually transfering to the kitchen. Just as Jaehyun reaches out for a mug, a container catches his attention.

''Made too much, you can eat it if you want.'' The sticker on it says.

His eyes must be playing with him. What has gone to the witch? Should he be scared? Although overthinking aside, you mentioned that you only made more than enough for one person, hence giving it to him. Welp, free breakfast for him then.

Sitting down, Jaehyun takes off his coat lest he stains it minutes before he attends an appointment. The lid clicks open and his nostrils hit with an appetizing scent of eggs and bacons. There's some rice and tomatoes on the side as well.

Biting the bacon along with rice, Jaehyun chews slowly, checking out the taste. He then hums, figuring out there's nothing to be afraid of. They taste like what they should've been. Strangely, Jaehyun thinks it tastes more delicious.

Today, you are not at the unit as it is the start of your 'redeeming reputation' era. Jaehyun ponders what you're doing right now. Are you sleepy? He heard you talking to your friend at 2am. Have you eaten breakfast properly? You eat a little in the morning. Are you having fun? Or you're just pretending to be? You don't fancy gatherings unless it's with people you are close to.

Jaehyun doesn't know when he started thinking of you, he just catches himself wondering what you're up to often. Is he catching feelings? Is he getting infatuated? Jaehyun doesn't think much of it. If he's developing feelings, then so be it. Would it be bad for him to harbor romantic feelings for his–

Saliva lands everywhere on the counter as Jaehyun launches forward, spitting what he ate at the empty spot of his plate. ''What the fuck..?''

Using a fork, he pokes the egg, turning it sideways, up and down. The food breaks down with all the movement, revealing the receipt that left an overly salty taste on Jaehyun's buds.

Fishing out his phone, he snaps a picture of the devil food in front of him before sending it to you, uncaring if it looks disgusting and all chewed up.

JH: What the hell is this?

Not even a minute, you reply. As if you've been waiting for him to message you.

You: Uh.. egg? Duh.

Jaehyun clicks his tongue.

JH: I know it's a goddamn egg. Why the fuck does it have clumps of rock salts in it? We put iodized, not the huge ones.

You: Heh. *Tongue out and eyes shut closed tightly emoji*

Jaehyun gulps down his water alongside his irritation, eyebrows meeting each other. He tries to settle for the bacon and rice but the demonic egg fucked up his taste buds and now, he can't enjoy his breakfast. Jaehyun should've known his fate was written the moment he decided to prank you.

Little did the royalty know, it was just the start of his road to slow death. Starting from the salty as fuck eggs, Jaehyun soon finds out you took the remote of the TV and so he couldn't watch the movie he had been waiting for since the announcement of its release date, unfortunately Jaehyun is not one to remember his passwords– he couldn't log in on his mobile phone.

What comes next is the kitchen sprinklers. You must've noticed Jaehyun cooks his own food from thereon (the egg incident) and figures out it'll be a good idea to use it against him. Jaehyun didn't see the lack of labels on the sprinklers, and with his hands already memorizing the placement of herbs and spices, Jaehyun grabs what he knows is the right one. Long story short, the prince opts for food delivery as his kimchi jjigae was for the ants. It was like the demon egg all over again, except this time, it was fucking sweet.

3 days later, when Jaehyun's favorite sneakers went missing, he knew he hadn't misplaced them. Is he unlucky that you're out of the city to do your princess duties? Maybe. Is he gonna let this piss him off? No, that means satisfying your goals. This is nothing, Jaehyun can search for it, surely it's somewhere in the house.

Wrong. Well, it is in the area of the house but it's not in the house. Guess where Jaehyun found his fucking sneakers? On the fucking rooftop. How did you even put that there, he doesn't have a clue. In the end, Jaehyun had to climb a ladder and fell once at the third step (he's quite clumsy, yes) before retrieving his shoes.

As Jaehyun sits through a meeting in a stained white (or should he say pink) dress shirt, he is surely determined to get that win back

Acting civil with your fianceé is something you didn't expect after a constant back and forth of ruining each other's day, but you suppose it's only appropriate in a dinner with the family of both sides. Royals like meals as family bonding it seems, not that you know. Or do your parents consider discussing country matters on dinners as one?

Sipping your champagne, you hum quietly at the taste, too busy in your own world to listen to whatever conversation they are having at the other side of the table. That is until your father softly calls your name. You turn to him and pay attention.

''How's your appearances doing so far?''

''Good, I guess..? If it's not, Eunhye won't let me rest for a day or two.''

It's not like the King and Queen only orders you to help in charities and orphanages solely for building a good reputation for you, they also genuinely care about the unfortunate.

''That's great to hear then.'' Queen Miyoung smiles. And even though you're once struck by her beauty, it doesn't sit well with you.

''Hmm?''

What your mother says next emits a confused look from you. ''Prince Jaehyun will be accompanying you in every schedule, especially those that involves the media.''

You frown. ''But I thought it was for my image? Why would I need him to come with me?''

''Because once people see you getting along with your husband, moreover someone known for his kind and compassionate personality, it'll be easier to convince them that you've changed. Prince Jaehyun will be a great help to you.''

Seeing the grin that the man in front of you is not-so trying to hide, you clench your fist around the cutleries. How irritating.

''It was all thanks to the Prince for he voluntarily comes forward to join you on your appearances including those that does not involve medias.''

So the suffering you'll experience for the following weeks was his idea?

Squinting your eyes at the prince, you reach your foot forward, your face remains unchanging. You observe Jaehyun who's happily eating his food for a few seconds before smirking and stomping down on his foot hard enough to make it hard for him to hide his pathetic whimper.

Concern and worries are thrown at him but he dismisses them with his usual flower smile. Jaehyun then looks at you, his eyes diverting your subtly hidden fist, gesturing to punch him as a representative for your irritation at him. Jaehyun tongues his cheek and chuckles. He dares to fucking chuckle?!

Why is he smiling as if he won the olympics? Why is he so smug about this? And more importantly, why is your heart racing as you stare at the dimples shyly peeking out?

You yelp as you accidentally bite your tongue. Before you could even reach for yours, Jaehyun shoves his glass of water to your hands. Everyone is looking at the exchange, you have no choice but to accept his offer. You wanted them to believe this marriage fell apart naturally, and not because you sabotaged it. Though, you plan on doing the latter.

King Jaekyung's snicker rings on your ears. ''Ah, it seems like the two have been getting along. Perhaps the shared apartment was indeed a great idea.''

Your mother follows right after, clapping lightly. ''Right, right. Look at them, treating each other like real lovers. I'm not gonna be surprised if they themselves request for the wedding to be done soon.''

''How lovely. Are you alright though, darling? What has caused you to bite your tongue?'' Queen Miyoung worries.

''It's noth–''

''She was too busy staring at my face, Mom.'' Now, what the flying fuck is this motherfuck trying to play?

Queen Miyoung squeaks. ''Is that so?''

''Yes– my fianceé here even once said I'm too handsome, I could be up as an exhibit in Louvre.''

You give Jaehyun a smile so sarcastic he will know to run for his life the moment you two get out of here. The other people in the room thought it was a smile fondness instead. While Jaehyun sends you a finger heart, you itch to send him the middle finger.

Your mother shares a giggle with Mrs. Jung. ''Ah.. young love.''

Jaehyun earns another stomp.

Days after the dinner with the Kings and Queens sees you and Jaehyun in a kindergarten wearing pink white polka dots aprons. The little humans cheer as their teacher announces that they'll be designing their own cakes today with the help of the visitors. Visitors being you and Jaehyun.

Raising a piece of fruit, you snatch the kids' attention. ''Who wants some strawberries?'' 

''I want to! I want–!'' Little Seol-a makes grabby hands to you, making you chuckle.

''Okay, okay. Say ah..'' Popping the strawberry in Seol-a's mouth, you receive a cute giggle and 'thank you' from the little girl.

As the teacher announces the start of the making, everyone quickly gets to work, eager to create their most beautiful versions of cakes. Since you also have a cake to decorate, you only look at the kids every now and then, checking up on them. So far, everyone's doing good.

A high-pitched voice calls you. ''Can you please help me with the icing..?''

Smiling, you leave your seat and transfer beside Mina. ''What should we do?''

''I want it pink like Seol-a's, it's so pretty!''

Mina's words pull Seol-a out of her focus, turning to the two of you. Seol-a purses her lips. ''But I'm making it for my mommy. Does your mommy likes pink too?''

Mina looks down and her eyebrows crease in thinking. ''No. My mama likes blue, I think..''

Watching the exchange, you could tell that Seol-a doesn't want to tell Mina off but at the same time, she doesn't want her friend to do exactly the same as she's decorating hers specifically at the thought of her mom.

You decide to step up. ''Then, Mina, would you like yours to be blue?''

Mina ponders for a second before nodding, smiling a bit. ''Okay..''

Seol-a perks up. ''Mina! I'll be pink and yours will be blue, and then let's decorate it the same so our mommies would get matching cakes!''

Mina lights up at what she heard. She will have a matching cake with Seol-a, yet also have her own version. The two girls squeals at the cute teddy bears and gushes over the pastel colors their cakes will be. You smile in adoration.

Minutes pass, little humans ask for your assistance until almost everyone at your table is finished. You feel a tap on your back.

''Hi, Rowoon!''

The chubby boy smiles cutely at you, hugging you. ''Teacher, can you come help me please? Teacher Jaehyun is a bit busy with the others.''

Glancing at Jaehyun, a bunch of kids flock around him, calling his name and asking for his help. It has no sign of dwindling down so you nod, heading towards the boy's place after telling your own group that you'll be at the other table. As you help Rowoon with his cakes, you fail to ignore the conversations he's having with the kids due to the proximity.

''I love chocolates, I eat them everyday! Teacher, do you like chocolates?''

''Yes, of course. Chocolates is one of my favorites.''

''I like chocolate too but my mom won't let me eat more than three. Does your mom let you eat a lot of chocolate, Teacher?''

Jaehyun laughs, shaking his head at the core memory of Queen Miyoung scolding him for eating too much sweets. ''No, she doesn't. Your teeth will turn bad if you eat a lot of it and mommies are just taking care of you.''

''Turn bad? Like fall out–?!'' 

''Most likely.'' The little boy covers his mouth dramatically, earning another laugh from Jaehyun.

''Teacher! Your cake is so pretty!''

''Why, thank you, Yuna.'' Jaehyun boops her nose with a clean finger.

''You should get an award for having a pretty cake.''

One kid appears. ''My mommy gives me kisses as an award!''

''Me too!''

''Does your mommy gives you kisses too, Teacher?''

What's with these kids and questions about mommies?

''No, she doesn't.''

''Oh no.. is she mad at you?''

Jaehyun giggles. ''She's not. She used to give me kisses but not anymore because I'm a big boy now.''

''Ah, you don't want kisses anymore?''

Thinking he will earn kisses from the little kids if he says no, Jaehyun tells them he loves kisses. Humming, one of them then points a finger.

''Teacher will give you kisses as a reward if your cake is the prettiest!''

Jaehyun follows the path where the kid is pointing at. ''Really?'' His eyes landed on you, still and unmoving. Jaehyun bites his lower lip to stop the laugh rumbling on his chest.

Jaehyun grins. ''Then I should work on making this the prettiest cake ever made.''

You almost choke on your own spit.

Articles after articles, headlines after headlines. Old people gush about how pure your interactions are. Adults nudge each other at how you sweetly stare. Teenagers envies how Jaehyun performs all love language at you. It seems like everything now revolves around the Crown Princess and her lover.

The crowd certainly loves the contrasts between you and Jaehyun whereas you're more carefree and casual while Jaehyun sticks to his formal attitude. One thing that became popular amongst your supporters, or 'shippers', is the picture of you– like the diva that you are– wearing a pink miniskirt, corset top, socks with ribbons on top, mary jane pumps, and a cream loose cardigan sits beside Jaehyun who is dawned in his usual dress shirt, slacks, and blazer. You cannot forget that fanfic you found wherein Jaehyun is a CEO and you're a supermodel. Shippers are imaginative and delusional at the same time.

It's been 2 months since you've started attending events with the prince and it wasn't as hellish as you thought. Maybe because Jaehyun can't cause a problem in public, or maybe he just doesn't find the need to. Nonetheless, that didn't cease the fire that is the prank war. It goes on and on that even Winter finds it hilarious at this point. Who knew the lovely couple searched for a list of pranks to do in their free time so they could piss each other off?

Lately though, you've noticed (actually it was Winter) that your pranks have been getting less harmful to your daily lives and had just become something to enlighten the mood. Like the clown that pops up when you open the fridge and the snake balloon hidden in the tin can. Very uncharacteristically, you even find yourselves posting each other's reactions on your stories. And if Jaehyun created an instagram account just to upload videos and pictures of you, you're not so sure. A thing you're certain though is that the dislike for Jaehyun had faded away and was replaced by something else. Something you're yet to find out.

''A penny for your thoughts?'' A finger snaps you out of your thoughts. Jaehyun grins.

You shake your head and continue looking for the best quality of vegetables as Jaehyun follows you around, pushing your cart. Another thing that you've grown to get used to is doing groceries with Jaehyun. Very domestic, isn't it?

''Can we buy this one?'' Jaehyun points at the packs of big marshmallows.

Frowning, you shake your head. ''What're you gonna need it for? It'll just expired at the cabinet.''

''No, it won't.''

''How so?''

''I'll eat it before you can even say chubby bunny.''

''No, Jeong.''

''But we have a mini chocolate fountain machine at home!''

''Yes, a fountain machine you, may I say–'' You face him. ''–unnecessarily bought. Literally no reason to buy one.''

''Well now I can finally use it and it won't be useless anymore..?''

Tsking, you walk away to look at the meat. In the end, Jaehyun huffs, staring longingly at his marshmallows before tailing you, steps heavy.

After shopping for at most 2 weeks worth of food, you type on your phone while Jaehyun carries all those bags. So much for being a macho man. Winter sends an atrocious idea and forces a laugh out of you.

''What's funny?'' Jaehyun asks like a curious cat, peeking at your phone.

''Winter says we should announce that all of this is fake at the upcoming press conference and film Eunhye's reaction. God, that would be hilarious honestly.''

''Oh..'' And curiosity finally kills the cat. Jaehyun mums. Are you faking it all this time? Are you not enjoying your time with him? Are you faking having fun whenever you're with him, even now?

You are about to ask Jaehyun for the car keys but as someone who spends their entire life under the spotlight, you know a camera when you see one. Pocketing your phone, you stride towards the man at the car beside Jaehyun's. Said man tries to run away but you are quicker with your feet and grab him by his collar, you hear Jaehyun's call of your name.

''What's wro–''

''Give me the phone.''

''Why– what's happeni–''

''Give me the fucking phone!'' Shoving the man to a car, he winces at the pain in his back. When he surrenders his phone, you delete his video and throw it on the ground before stomping on it, crashing it.

Jaehyun calls your name again. ''Why did you do that? Stop, you're choking him.''' Though obviously wanting to calm you down, Jaehyun doesn't touch you anywhere, opting to wash his palm over his face.

You ignore him and focus on the man shivering in your hold. ''Tell me, what the fuck do want?''

''Nothing–''

You dig your forearm deeper to his neck. ''I'm only gonna ask this twice, you fucking twig. What do you want?''

The man struggles to breathe but attempts to answer anyway. ''I–I was.. paid to–'' He wheezes. ''To prove t-that.. Prince Jaehyun isn't what– what he pretends to be.'' The man coughs.

Raising a brow at what you hear, you wrap your hand around his throat and lean closer to his ear. ''Listen here, fucking microphallus. I know this fucker here looks like he's a worldwide known actor but in reality, he can't act for his fucking life. This man doesn't have a fucking future in acting. He can't fake anything, he's too goody shoes. This prince can't do a thing except entertaining the fucking crowd.''

He is genuine and is not pretending in front of the cameras. Is what Jaehyun can hear between your lines.

''So if you're thinking of exposing him and shit– too bad for you, Jeong lives his life by the books.''

Sighing, Jaehyun tugs at your shirt. ''Let's.. let's let him go. He said he was just paid to do it, didn't he?''

Glancing at the prince, you could see the stress on his irritatingly handsome face and annoyingly, you find yourself to hate the foreign emotion on it. Clicking your tongue, you let go of the man but grips his collar again before he can get away. ''Spread misinformations about my fianceé again, you'll be caressing metal bars the next day.''

Jaehyun holds your hand to take it away from the man and fixes his mask. ''Sir, you can send your resumé at the palace and you should be offered a job with monthly payment. Please don't ever damage someone for the sake of quick money. Money wears off in time, but the damage doesn't.''

With that, Jaehyun tugs you away from the scene. During the ride, silence fills the car and as you arrive at the apartment, that's when you realize Jaehyun's hand is still intertwined with you from the moment he holds it until you reach the flat. Why does Jaehyun look like it's the most normal thing? Why is your heart doing the fucking rabbity pumps?

Jaehyun heaves a sigh. ''Damn.. that's actually crazy– I can't even believe it happened. It went by so fast, my brain couldn't process the fact that someone believes I fake my personality and manners in front of the camera. Like–''

You plop to the couch.

''–what did I even do? Did I upset them? Did they say hi to me one time and I didn't say it back? Did they–''

''I punched the guy because I wanted to protect my friend.''

Jaehyun stops arranging the items you bought. ''What–?''

Hugging your knees, you keep your eyes on Jaehyun's. ''It was my friend's birthday and she wanted to celebrate it in this bar, it was called gangbang. Controversial, I know. We were having fun just like we planned to. But a group of guys at the other table starts joining in. We weren't paying attention to them– or at least, I wasn't. But one of my friends starts complaining about how one of the guys 'accidentally' brushes his hand on her ass too many times. Accidental, my ass. No one wants to come forward so I did, being the hero that I am. I talked to the guy calmly and asked what's wrong. Said guy told me my friend was lying but fuck– my friend was this close to crying about it. And then I got pissed at how his friends defends him when the CCTV clearly shows the incident so I fucking punched him and broke his nose.''

''Next thing I know, news outlets reports me getting involved in a brawl and ruining a fucking commoner's nose without including the reason why I did it.'' You scoff. ''Said friend I protected refused a statement and left the country without defending me.''

Jaehyun sits at the carpeted floor, facing you, looking with worry in his eyes. Something in your eyes flashes but disappears before Jaehyun could even determine what it is.

''And the pictures of me sleeping on the streets?''

Jaehyun hums, caressing your hands.

''They told everyone I was so fucking drunk I couldn't even bring myself home and showed videos of me chugging vodkas, whiskeys, beers straight from their bottle. But why didn't they show the part where all those fucking people around me gangs up on me and calls me a fucking pussy, a no fun, and a fucking killjoy. They didn't stop until I agreed on drinking all those fucking liqours.'' You sniffs, you didn't even know when you started tearing up.

''And that video where my bodyguard had to carry me because I wouldn't wake up? The palace was on emergency alert at that time– why? Because alcohol and sleeping pills were mixed inside me. When I tried to explain what happened, no one fucking believed someone slipped me a fucking bunch of sleeping pills– my heartbeat was fucking slowing down and I was over-sedated, Jaehyun. There's no point of telling them the truth when they already decided I was fucking lying. For fuck's sake, I was near to dying that fucking night– god!'' You bury your head in your knees, shoulders shaking as you sob, fist continuously knocking your head hard.

Jaehyun hugs your quivering figure, whispering words that he knows best that'll comfort and calm you. ''I understand you. I believe you. It's okay, love. You're gonna be okay. I'm here, alright? I'm here, love. Everything's gonna be okay.''

Your cries haven't even died down when you look at him. Jaehyun thinks vulnerability was the flickering emotions behind your eyes these past minutes that he failed to catch on.

''Aside from the people who did those shits, Winter is the only one who knows about the truth. Because she's important to me.'' You hiccup, tears streaming down your face. ''Do you get why I'm telling you this, Jeong?''

There's a clue, but Jaehyun doesn't want to get ahead of you. ''..why?''

You chuckle while crying, more tears roll down your cheeks. ''God, you're so fucking stupid, aren't you? Winter is important to me so she knows the truth. I told you the truth because–'' You bow your head down and hold Jaehyun's hands. ''–you're more than just important to me.''

Jaehyun's breath hitches, and the world stops. ''Oh baby..'' He kisses the back of your hands and the top of your head before hugging you tightly.

He attempts to say the words that have been at the tip of his tongue since you decorated cakes with the kids but you cut him off.

''I will hurt you, Jeong, accidentally. I don't communicate. I don't open up. I find it hard to trust people easily despite sharing a close bond with them. I curse more than I say affectionate and loving words. I push away more than I pull. I'm violent. I am broken, I'm a mess.''

Jaehyun smiles, so handsomely it makes your heart ache. ''You don't communicate and open up? That's fine, I can read between your lines. You find it hard to trust people? That's alright, trusts are earned, not bought. You curse more than being lovey dovey? Well, I'm lovey dovey more than cursing. You push more than you pull? Isn't it great that I'm the exact opposite. You're violent? I could do the talking, you could do the punching. You're broken? I will patch you up again and again. You're a mess? So what, you're a beautiful kind of mess. And if you hurt me and wound my heart.. well then– Sorry, Heart.''

Right there and then, the faceless man that you saw at the bar and had a crush on morphs with Jaehyun's. You chuckle. ''Fate is playing with us, isn't it?''

Jaehyun cradles your face. ''And I'm glad it did. Because I met you.''

''You're such a sap.''

''Oh shush, you love it.''

''Maybe, maybe not.''

''Pfft, wait– does this mean we stop the pranks now?''

''Do what the hell you want, but you'll continuing to be pissed off first thing in the morning.''

Operation: Stop the wedding! Step 3, fall in love with your soon-to-be-groom.

A shudder electrifies the fibers of your body as Jaehyun spreads the cold juices of peaches along the lines of your collarbone, his tongue dips in next, easing to freezing temperature with his warmth. He sucks where the sticky liquid lays previously, his cravings of sweetness beaming in glee as the flavor slowly seeps in him.

Your breath heavy, hands moving to caress your boyfriend's blond strands as his kisses travel to your breasts. The flesh of the fruit circles your nipples before Jaehyun dives in, sucking the hard nubs all the while fondling and playing with the other. Quiet moans of pleasure finally escape your lips after minutes of holding back, your head lolls back and your eyes close shut, sighing from the pleasure slowly building up. Slurping sounds bounces off the four walls of your shared bedroom, it's so obscene that anyone who could hear it could certainly feel how hungry Jaehyun is for the mixture of the peach's sweetness and the bits of saltiness coming from your sweat. It's disgusting to think but Jaehyun's cock gets only harder with each taste.

The surface of his hand palms your clothed core, thumbing where he's sure your clit settles and gives the area a slight pressure, he makes circles around the button that elicits a series of whimpers from you.

Fuck. How he wishes to see this image of you everytime. Your glossy eyes, puckered swollen slips, and whole face scrunched up as your body shivers in his hold, back arching as pleas of having him inside you draws out. 

Break me, wreck me, ruin me. Those are everything your body screams. 

Oh, he will ruin you, alright.

Jaehyun rips the remaining pieces of clothing off of you, gripping your legs apart, wide and open just for him. The way your pussy glistens under the dim lights of the room, the prince's lust fuels up until he could no longer bear the desire of devouring you. 

His mouth, his tongue, his body, his mind -- screams for your taste, it craves the feeling of you thrashing against his embrace as you fall apart. And Jaehyun.. he's just a man. One who could only do much to control himself from drowning his face in the sea of tempting your slick.

''Ooh, Jaehyun, please..'''

From the alley your legs created, you are able to see Jaehyun's face and how his brow quirks in question to your plea. He's so fucking cruel, unlike the gentleman and polite prince everyone in your country had loved since the beginning. If they only know.

The pad of his tongue follows the traces of your juice, squeezing the last bits of the peach and lets it trickle down on your pussy. Dipping the tip of his tongue, he wiggles it until he's deep inside your warm tight walls, clenching on his muscle as he fucks you with it.

''Jaehyun–! Fuck!''

Your hips jerks upwards, practically offering your core to Jaehyun's face. That, Jaehyun accepts. Gripping each thigh, he pins you to the bed as he sucks, licks, and devours more than you offer.

Jaehyun's fingers join his tongue, squelches emitting from your soaked pussy as Jaehyun's digits continuously penetrate it. By the time Jaehyun is about to add the fourth finger, he sees your eyes rolling and notices the constant clenches of your walls– a telltale sign of your climax. And Jaehyun isn't Jaehyun if not a bastard in bed.

He pulls away before walking away to fetch something, all the while unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants. Jaehyun reaches the foot of your bed, he tugs his pants and boxers down, revealing a girthy and lengthy dick with an angry tip.

Jaehyun pumps his cock, staring at your sore pussy and fucked out face. Your breathlessness is music to his ears.

''Jaehyun, please..''

''Please?''

You open your legs wider, hands dipping between your legs to spread the cheeks of your pussy. ''It's all yours. Please, fuck me.''

''Fucking hell..'' Jaehyun nudges your legs open as you both moan in unison as his cock pushes past your entrance, veins rubbing against the tight velvet walls. Jaehyun plans to wait for you to adjust, but you shake your head. He smirks, and starts fucking.

''My girl is getting brave, huh? Let's how much you can fucking take.''

God, this is why you love Jaehyun in bed. This is the only time you hear him curse, be rough, and manhandle you in positions you didn't even know you're capable of doing.

You ask for it hard, and Jaehyun gives it every time. Wrapping his hand under your knee, he folds your body until it touches your chest as Jaehyun slides deeper, reaching deep inside you that a bump appears every now and then on your stomach.

''Fuck– do you see that, baby? Look at your stomach, shit, it's bulging. Am I too big for your tight pussy, baby?''

Jaehyun pins you against the headboard with his weight as drools escape the corners of your lips, dribbling down your neck. You grip the top of the headboard for support.

''Ah ah ah! S-so good.. so good!''

Jaehyun chuckles lowly. ''Does it, baby? Tell me what makes you feel good.''

''Y–your big–big cock! Fuck, i-it's so, haahh, so big!''

''That's right. My big fat cock is making my girl feel so good; she can't even construct a proper sentence. Do you know how that makes me fucking feel, baby? I feel like a fucking king, you know. Crown Princess, fucking feisty and always hissing at everyone, crumbling down at the feeling of my cock at her guts.''

Jaehyun plows into you deliciously, white spots showing themselves at different parts of your vision as pleasure takes over your body. ''You're so fucking tight, baby. You're choking me.''

Yelping, you hold onto Jaehyun as he withdraws from your pussy, carrying you as he transfers you to the glass window near the bed, pushing you against it before he starts pounding vigorously once again, teeth sinking to break your skin, lapping the droplets of blood. Lewd moans knock out of your throat. Seeing your reflection from the window, you're reminded of those pornos you've watched as a curious teen.

''Jaehyun– uh, uh, Jaehyun! You're gonna make me come!''

''Then come. Come for me, darling.''

You white out, shuddering in Jaehyun's hold as you clamp down on his cock, white ring appearing around his length. Jaehyun buries his head in the crook of your neck as he chases his own high, groaning as he finally reaches it, pulling out to finish himself on your back.

As a minute passes, you both regain the air your lungs have been desperately needing. Jaehyun makes you face him and kisses your lips full of gentleness, so in contrast to the rough pounding earlier.

And of course, Jaehyun isn't Jaehyun if not a sap after sex.

''I love you so much, baby.''

You snort. ''I do too, idiot. Now clean me up.''

Operation: Stop the wedding! Step 4, abort mission.

Come morning, the sunlight seeps through the curtains and shines on your bed beautifully. Jaehyun wakes up, his day already made at the sight of you sleeping peacefully in his arms. You look adorable, like you couldn't harm a fly. You wouldn't if said fly doesn't harm any of your loved ones.

God, Jaehyun is so fucking in love with you. You smile, his day is made. You breathe, suddenly the weather is perfect. You exist, Jaehyun finds every reason to live. You are the water that keeps Jaehyun tethered.

''What the fuck do you want, Jeong?''

The prince chuckles. 8am in the morning and you're already so grumpy. It confuses a few staff members how Jaehyun fell in love with you. If he won't get in trouble, he'll tell them you're a witch and make him drink some irreversible love potion or what.

''Nothing. You're pretty.''

''... Shut up. Just because you look fucking good in the morning.''

''Thank you, baby. I love you.''

''Ugh, you're too in love with me.''

Jaehyun giggles. ''I am. Will you marry me?''

You stop yawning and look at him as though he grew a second head (or third..?). ''The fuck did you say?''

''Will you marry me, baby?''

You scoff. ''Ask that again if you have a ring to out around me.'' The words are mumbled but Jaehyun manages to hear it.

''What?''

''I said your breath stinks, Jeong.''

Shaking his head in disbelief, Jaehyun laughs deeply, caused by his morning voice. You find that hot but you won't te him because he'll use it against you everytime.

Jaehyun reaches for something behind him, inside the drawer, and faces you again. There you see a small red box on his palm, Jaehyun opens it and reveals the ring you've once mentioned to be your dream ring. Wordlessly, he slips the ring on your finger after taking off the fake one.

''But we're already engaged though.''

''Eh.. that was fake, baby. This one's real.''

You raise a brow. ''I haven't even said yes.''

''You'll say no to me?''

''Pfft, you're getting too cocky. I don't like that.''

''Hmm, sure, love.'' Jaehyun smiles warmly and takes you in his arms again. You bury your head in his chest.

''Jeong,''

Jaehyun hums.

''I hate you for making me feel this way.''

Jaehyun settles his hands on the sides of your face and caresses your cheeks with his thumbs. ''I love you too, witch.''

''Psst,''

''What now, baby?''

''I love you, Jaehyun.''

Operation: Stop the wedding! Step 5 and the last step, be in love and marry each other for real.

[hornychristianprincess]

wasted (leehan x fem reader) FINAL

paring: leehan x fem reader, ft. taesan genre: smut, fluff, angst, fuckboy!leehan word count: 15k summary: finally confessing your feelings to leehan leads to a reaction you could have never prepared for. warnings: unwanted sexual advances (NOT from leehan), explicit [consensual] sex scenes, oral (female receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it b4 you tap it ppl) read on ao3 if you please by clicking HERE.

“Jaehyun, you have a lot of friends, right?” asks Leehan when he and his roommate are relaxing in their shared living room, doing homework. “Do you know anyone who works in the tutoring office? Blonde streak of hair?”

It’s the only attributes he can remember about the guy he saw you entering your room with only a few days ago, noticing the blue tutoring office logo on the chest of his polo shirt and the distinctive stripe of color in the middle his head. 

“Oh yeah, I think you’re talking about Taesan,” says Jaehyun, who luckily isn’t paying attention enough to his roommate to notice how he perks up at just the name. “Why?”

Even Leehan himself isn’t exactly sure why he cares so much. 

It’s hypocritical at best and gross at worst to think that you have any less of a right to screw around than he does. 

But whether it's his innate territoriality coming into play or the fact that he’s upset it wasn’t him at your side instead, he can’t help but see you differently after what he saw.

“I saw him with some girl I was fucking. Sexual partners are like cars – You don’t want one everyone gets to use, you know?”

Jaehyun, who had up until this point been lying on the floor and playing idly with his Nintendo switch, sits up to look at Leehan. “You’re not talking about Y/N, are you?”

The first thought that comes to a surprised Leehan’s mind is what he said to have tipped Jaehyun off. Failing to think of any divertive lie, he decides there’s no harm in Jaehyun knowing, only wondering, “How’d you find out?”

“I saw her going into your room the night of my Halloween party,”  he explains reasonably, before his voice and facial expression turn suddenly serious. “You shouldn’t talk about her like that. She’s going through a lot right now. She just failed all of her midterms and she might get kicked out of school.”

“Wait, really?” asks Leehan, who is hit with a sudden pang of deja vu as if he’s heard this before but doesn’t remember from where. 

And then, it’s with a sudden and strong surge of embarrassment that he remembers the moment when he was feeling horny and decided to send you a dick pic, pressing the little blue arrow after only briefly glancing at the above messages.

“Oh shit. I think she told me that.”

Jaehyun laughs jeeringly, the resentful sound of which brings Leehan out of his own spiraling thoughts. “You’re an asshole, man,” he asserts, saying it in a way that’s so casual it’s as if it’s just a known fact. 

Not an insult or a compliment, but simply a thing that’s true. 

And somehow, the neutrality of it hurts worse. 

“No offense, but I totally hope she forgets she ever met you.”

Hit by the irony of such cruel words being preceded by no offense, Leehan becomes sarcastic to avoid having to express the true hurt of being told that. “None taken. That seriously wasn’t offensive at all, Jaehyun.”

Maybe Jaehyun is right. After working so hard to emphasize the line between being fuckbuddies and being in a relationship, yet still finding himself acting the exact way he feared you would, isn’t asshole the only way to truly express how shitty he’s being about this? 

It’s at that moment that Leehan considers that perhaps this relationship between the two of you has spiraled out of control. 

Because something that should be inherently easy and casual has now caused him far too much regret and remorse for his liking.

Sitting in an empty classroom with Taesan, you share a cup of bubble tea, the drinking of which causes you to bump hands several times as you reach out to grab it at the same time. 

Interacting with Taesan always brings up sweet and innocent feelings that are like that of childhood crushes, or chasing fireflies on your lawn after dark. 

Fall break has long been over and yet you continue to meet with him even outside of your mandatory weekly check-ins, forgetting the anxiety that once plagued you over this arrangement. 

The time you spend with Taesan is so fulfilling that you’ve managed to completely forget that Leehan hasn’t contacted you in almost a week. 

Well, maybe not completely. 

You still wonder from time to time what he’s thinking, if maybe he read the text message you sent prior to his dick pic and internalized the part where you emphasized how you wouldn’t have time for him anymore.

There is of course a tiny part of you that feels empty and abandoned at the idea of him ghosting you and never talking to you again.

But it’s in a stroke of optimism, feigned or otherwise, that you decide to pour your attention into someone who feels like a much better match for you, that someone being Taesan.

“I’m just about to finish with this assignment. After I’m done, do you wanna go to the caf?” you mumble out in inquiry to Taesan as you check over your quiz answers for the last time before submitting. 

You hear him make a noncommittal noise in response, which you first interpret as disinterest, but only seconds later recognize to be absent-mindedness as you feel his eyes warming the side of your face. 

You let out a chuckle, just about to say something teasing to him for being caught staring at you when a few warm fingers glide across your ear. Taken aback, you meet Taesan’s gaze as he tucks away a piece of your stray hair. 

“Are you okay?” he asks softly, holding your face in his hand. “You have this…faraway look in your eyes.”

Your eyes dart between his face and his hand that’s slow to come off of your ear, surprised by the sudden bit of physical contact.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you answer calmly if maybe a bit shakily, trying to appear normal though your head screams with a million passing thoughts at once. Taesan nods in acceptance of this answer before turning back to his laptop as if nothing happened. 

If you were at all a gambling person, you’d bet good money that the telltale, suave move of tucking your hair behind your ear was a way for him to see how you’d react to something less platanotic from him. 

And if you were to allow this moment to pass by without saying anything, you know that he would follow your lead and pretend like this never happened. He’d use your silence as evidence that his advances are unwelcome. 

Perhaps you’re feeling a little bold, but you don’t want him to go any longer thinking that his interest isn’t reciprocated.

“Wait,” you remark, reaching out to grab Taesan’s wrist. “Taesan, can I kiss you?”

The usually mysterious, confident boy loses his ability to speak when you ask him that, eyes going wide and only nodding to communicate his consent. Finding his sudden shyness charming, you smile as you lean in to press your lips against his. 

Taesan’s mouth is just as inviting as you thought it would be all the times you spent staring at it when you were sure he wasn’t looking. He may have acted shy just now, but the way that Taesan kisses you is like fire. He presses his mouth hard against yours, and when his body does the same you soon find yourself pressed into the rolling chair you’re sitting in.

Your hand moves up to tangle in his hair, pulling him in to deepen the kiss. You were sure that Taesan, ever the responsible one, would be the person between the two of you to pull away before things got too heated. 

But now, all he does is lean in to your provocations, sticking his tongue into your mouth while you whimper against his. 

And as you try to allow your brain to white out so that you can truly relax into the gratification he is sure to give you, all you can think about is how his lips are not Leehan’s lips.

His hands are not Leehan’s hands. 

His kiss doesn’t evoke even a fraction of the electricity that Leehan does just by looking at you. 

You accept then that self-preservation must be a confounding myth to your psyche, because against all odds, you are still very much into Leehan. 

And while you could easily fuck Taesan anyway and let the enjoyment of his sex prove as a temporary salve to the gaping wound that is your feelings for Leehan, you feel too much like he doesn’t deserve to fuck someone with such selfish intentions. 

So, it’s with both regret and sobering understanding that you pull Taesan away from you, lines of spit breaking into drool as you separate.

The two of you become temporarily frozen in a moment of both confusion and shock. Taesan, looking at you with widened eyes and reddened lips, asks in a small yet urgent voice, “What? Is something wrong?”

You already feel like a piece of shit as you loosen your grip on Taesan’s hair, letting your hands fall to your lap and noticing that his still rest on your waist. “Taesan…” you begin, and already at just the sound of his name, you can see his expression wilting, like he knows by the unsure tone of your voice exactly what you’re going to say. And how couldn’t he, when you suck so badly at giving bad news?

“I think you’re an amazing person. And believe me when I say I really, really wanted this between us,” you emphasize, wishing you could get swallowed up by a hole as he continues to stare at you in dumbfounded awe. 

You know that these aren't words anyone wants to hear but you feel compelled to say them, feeling like Taesan deserves honesty from you.

“To be completely candid with you, the reason why I’m on academic probation is because of a guy. A recent guy who treated me like shit, but because I’m an idiot, I still want him.”

You wait on edge for the moment when Taesan’s disposition will return to that of the understanding, kind person you’ve come to know, the moment when you’ll both laugh at the awkwardness of this situation and allow yourselves to forget it ever happened.

Instead, though, all you see in Taesan’s eyes is a fiery passion that makes your head hurt as you realize he won’t let this rejection go down easily. 

“You know that doesn’t matter to me right? We don’t have to…be all romantic, and shit. I’m fine with something casual. Happier with that, even.”

It’s with a pang of insecurity that you fight back a self-pitying laugh at those words, wondering what it is about you that makes men only want casual, no-strings-attached relationships with you. 

“I’m sorry for making things awkward. And if you don’t want to tutor me anymore after this, I’d completely understand,” you concede in the nicest possible tone you can muster, still incredibly conscious of Taesan’s hands that have still not left your waist. “But I can’t do this, Taesan. You’re amazing but I just…I can’t, okay?”

When Taesan continues to stare at you as if he isn’t comprehending a word that’s coming out of your mouth, you reach down to move his hands off of your waist yourself, and when you do,  you’re shocked when you feel his fingers seizing around your wrists to hold them in place. 

“You’re being ridiculous, Y/N. So what if you’re not over your ex? That shouldn’t stop you from getting your rocks off,” he says, voice rising considerably as he squeezes your wrists so harshly it begins to hurt. 

It’s at this moment that you realize you’ll never be able to look at Taesan the same again. 

No longer the sweet, kind and helpful boy you first met, he looks pathetic and at worst, scary as he continues to refuse your rejection.

“Taesan, I’m really gonna need you to let go of me,” you request, saying it without any niceties as you manage to convince yourself that maybe he’s just taking this extra hard for whatever reason and just needs to hear you being serious so that he can come to his senses. “Listen, how about we end early for today and talk about this another time–”

“I’m not letting you leave until you can look me in my eyes and give me one good reason why we shouldn’t do this,” he asserts, still holding your wrists, laughing a little in a way that makes it hard for you to tell if he knows that he’s making you uncomfortable or thinks that this is all just some game of hard-to-get. “You can act coy all you want but I know you want me, I could tell as soon as I met you.”

“I’m gonna tell you to let go of me one more time, Taesan, and then I start screaming,” you threaten, no longer feeling amused or pitiful but instead angry, adrenaline running through your veins as you consider the possibility of having to physically attack him. 

You’re not sure how things escalated so quickly but now you’re quickly regretting ever befriending Han Taesan in the first place, ever thinking that he could be a permanent fixture in your life.

Catching you by surprise, Taesan stands up suddenly from his chair and drags you up with him. It’s in a flurry of movements that he somehow manages to pin you against a wall, smirking down at you from above. 

You let out a squeal but he covers your mouth, strong enough to use only one of his hands to keep your arms pinned above your head. He laughs as you struggle against him, perhaps not realizing – or worse, realizing it and getting off on how deeply he’s managed to scare you.

“What?” he asks through upturned lips, pressing his body into yours. “Don’t girls like it when guys don’t take no for an answer?”

It’s in the strangest and most serendipitous stroke of luck that you hear the sound of the classroom door swinging open.

And when you turn your head to meet the gaze of your savior, it’s Leehan who you see standing there, taking in the scene in front of him. 

It feels stupid and random that of course it’s Leehan who just happened to be the person to walk in here, but you don’t dwell too much on the details, focused on the relief that floods through you knowing there’s someone here to intervene on your behalf. 

Leehan hesitates momentarily as he wonders if he’s just had the misfortune to accidentally walk in on the kinky foreplay between you and this new guy you’ve been seeing. Attending a lecture in this same building, he happened to walk by the classroom and hear a distressed voice that sounded vaguely familiar. 

Through the fogged glass material of the door, he could just barely make out your silhouette, instinctually barging in to see what was going on. 

If Leehan didn’t know you so well, he might’ve immediately bolted at the sight of you engaging in intimacy with someone else. It would be too much and he knows it would force him to confront his conflicting feelings towards you.

But the moment he meets your gaze and sees the steely, ice cold fear that’s in your eyes, his next moves are made clear. Without questioning anything, he steps forward and punches an already staggering Taesan in the face.

The punch causes Taesan to fall backward, blood that you aren’t sure is coming from his lip or his nose splattering onto the floor. You and Leehan remain frozen, you in shock at both Taesan’s actions and Leehan’s sudden presence, and Leehan with the adrenaline of becoming unexpectedly violent. 

It’s in that moment of stillness on both of your parts that Taesan has time to recover, and before you can react, he’s leaping forward to tackle Leehan onto a nearby desk.

You let out a squeal of shock as the two men struggle, causing desks and their chairs to fly around the room haphazardly in the process.

And to your horror, Taesan quickly gets the upper hand over Leehan, sitting on top of the shorter boy in a straddling position before letting his hands fly in a series of devastating punches. 

You go to pull him off but he pushes you away, forcing you then to search frantically for your phone in the hopes of calling campus security before Leehan is pulverized any further.

“Hey, is something going o—” you hear an unfamiliar voice ask, and you look up to find that you’ve been discovered by a complete stranger, a boy who you assume is another student by his shaggy attire and backpack. He answers his own question by glancing into the room and catching sight of Taesan and Leehan who are both now bleeding as they remain wrestling on the floor.

You’re just about to enlist the stranger to help you in dragging Taesan off of Leehan when, suddenly, you don’t have to. 

Realizing that the stranger’s presence could mean that even more people could arrive to inspect what’s causing all of this noise any second, you watch as the fear of getting in trouble overtakes Taesan’s expression until he’s getting up. 

He gets up and sprints out of the classroom wildly, shoulder checking the stranger in the process as he flees out of the building.

“Should I run after him?” asks the student at the door who you’re sure is still processing what he’s just seen. But more than anything else, you’re worried about Leehan, who you just saw taking several punches to the face and is laying down on the ground making strangled, agonized noises.

“No. It’s better that you scared him away. I just need to get him to the infirmary,” you reply, trying to sound more calm and controlled than you feel but hearing how your adrenaline from the past few minute’s events causes your voice to come out shaky and broken. The stranger asks if you need any help but you wave him away, deciding it would be too much of a burden to have to explain what just happened to anyone else. 

So it’s by yourself that you go to hover over Leehan’s body and try to push back the horror of seeing his face bloodied and bruised so that you can help him onto his feet.

And because most of the damage seems to be centralized on his face — maybe his back and head, too, after being tackled onto the ground — he mostly manages to stand up on his own. Though, once on his feet, he has to lean on you to avoid staggering.

“Don’t…let him…go, Y/N,” he mumbles, making you feel even more concerned and on edge as his garbled tone makes it sound like he’s one step away from passing out. “He was…hurting you, wasn’t he?”

“It’s fine, Leehan. Let’s just get you to the infirmary,” you reply dismissively, needing him to be pliant more than anything in this moment so that you can get him to your thankfully close by campus infirmary without issue. 

Your transgression with Taesan with startling and for a brief moment, terrifying. But with him now gone, the majority of your distress lies with Leehan and making sure he’s okay.

And to your relief, as you take a few steps forward with Leehan’s arm leaned over your shoulder, he remains upright and mostly autonomous in his movements.

He continues to say nothing on your way out of the building outside from the occasional groan, and you’re sure that as the adrenaline wears off that the pain in his face must become more present. You luckily make it to the infirmary moments later, where the doctor on call takes one look at Leehan’s face and immediately rushes him into a care room. 

Everything that happens after that is a bit of a blur for you. A campus security officer comes to take a statement from you. You tell him everything, giving him Taesan’s full name and picture in the hopes that it can lead to some type of action, although a part of you feels discouraged and numb at that notion.

You wait anxiously in the lobby of the infirmary, waiting for an update from the doctor and feeling like you’re gonna throw up when the older woman comes out from the hallway with a neutral, unreadable expression on her face.

“Hi ma'am. Your friend is doing just fine. All of the cuts on his face are superficial, so they’ll heal on their own. He’ll have some bruises and swelling, which will also go away with time. He does have a bit of a concussion, so we’ll send you both home with some Tylenol. If you’d like to come and see him, you can follow me.”

Though you figured that most of his injuries were minor, you still feel relieved to hear that nothing is significantly wrong; it’s irrational, but you know you would have been eaten alive with guilt had anything serious happened. 

Getting up to follow the doctor, you walk into the care room to find Leehan sitting on the edge of an examination chair, a nurse still applying little white bandaids to a cut on his cheek. When he sees you come in he smiles, though only fleetingly as the gesture causes him to wince in pain.

You don’t know what to say to him, so you opt to sit down on a chair that’s directly next to his dangling legs. You watch as the nurse goes to prod at a separate wound on his lip with a q-tip dipped in brown liquid. You don’t realize how tense you are until you feel the warmth of a hand over yours, and when you look up, Leehan is staring at you in amusement. 

“You’re shaking,” he observes, and though he can’t smirk without it causing him pain, he still gazes at you in a way that is teasing and smug. And the fact that he’s concerned about you when he’s the one who’s getting medical attention makes you let out a cynical, humorless laugh.

“Don’t worry about me. Look what he did to you.”

“I’m still good-looking, though, aren’t I?” he replies playfully, and because you’re so upset, you feel yourself almost inclined to scold him for making such jokes in light of the circumstances. But Leehan, never one to read the room or adhere to the tones and moods of others, is laughing as he commands, “You have to tell me or I’ll have an internal crisis.”

You stare at him with your eyebrows furrowed, wanting to be annoyed by him but not being able to help your smile as he continues to await your confirmation of his enduring looks with a pout. 

Rolling your eyes, it’s with a bit of resistance in your voice that you reply, “Yes, you’re still handsome, Leehan.”

He pumps his fist up in the air triumphantly, and with that, the nurse leaves the room, telling you that she’ll return with the official paperwork needed so that he can be discharged.

Once she’s gone, it’s quiet between the two of you until Leehan breaks the silence with a question. “That guy…his name’s Taesan, right?”

You’re taken aback, both at the sudden change in his tone and disposition –  his voice now serious and inquiring – and the fact that he even knows who Taesan is. “How do you know?”

“I saw you with him outside of your dorm. Asked Jaehyun who he is,” he responds plainly. And as you take in this information, you’re not sure what to say in reply. Even just knowing that he was outside of your dorm that day when Taesan came to your room and didn’t say anything makes you think he must’ve had some kind of reaction to seeing the two of you together. 

And as you put the timing together, it makes sense why you hadn’t heard from him for a week until now.

But then again, it doesn’t make sense. Because the Leehan you know, the Leehan you’ve come to resent, surely wouldn’t — shouldn't — care to see you with another guy when he’s been so adamant about keeping things non-exclusive between the two of you.

“Are you together?” he asks when you remain silent, and in what feels like a complete switch in power dynamics, you find that Leehan is the one now clearly expressing some kind of worry or at the very least interest in what you get up to when you’re not with him. 

And because you feel both vindicated to be on the other side of this sort of questioning, and not at all entitled to tell him the truth, you answer by asking, “If I said yes, what would you say?”

Leehan looks at you, all amusement absent from his expression even as he says somewhat sarcastically, “That I thought being with me meant you had better taste in men.”

His response causes you to scoff, the idea of him thinking that he’s somehow at a higher caliber than all the other similarly emotionally-unavailable men on your campus something you find absurd. 

And yes, maybe it’s because you’re already feeling a little bitter towards him that you’re then replying scathingly, “If anything, wouldn’t my interest in you mean the opposite?”

“Funny,” he says sardonically in reply. The atmosphere between the two of you currently is tense. He resents you for being with someone else and you resent him for setting boundaries for your relationship that he never intended to follow.

And yet, despite the unresolved negative emotions that are clearly swimming between the two of you, it feels absurd and crazy to say that as you continue to make unbroken and silent eye contact, you feel like he’s about to kiss you. 

That’s the sort of crazy chemistry you seem to have with one another, where even as you both have the rationality to recognize the toxicity of this dynamic you both still find yourselves magnetically pulled to one another in a way that, in most people’s eyes, would be viewed as mindless. 

But it’s just as you swear he’s leaning in that the doctor comes into the room, handing Leehan a clipboard and telling him he can go once he’s finished filling out a few forms. You wait for him, not sure what will happen once you leave but feeling almost responsible to at least see him to his apartment.

And so, you exit the hospital together, and it’s as you’re walking out that you voice to him truthfully, “It feels weird just dropping you off like you didn’t just get your face rearranged trying to save me.”

He lets out a chuckle in response, swinging his body so that he’s standing in front of you before shrugging and saying, “Then don’t drop me off. We could go to your dorm, watch a movie.”

The request to do something as simple as watch a movie sounds so foreign coming out of his mouth that you can’t help but laugh out loud. “When do we ever watch a movie?” you ask, repeating the words in disbelief. 

You’re mostly joking when you ask that, but it’s with a tiny pang of sadness that you acknowledge the tragedy of him wanting your company for something other than sex being something that’s so unbelievable.

“Today. Rocky V is probably ill-timed, but I love a good nature documentary,” he replies with a grin, and as always, you are unable to get a read on his expression to know if he is being serious or not. 

But today has been a crazy day and you know that being in your room by yourself after everything that’s happened is only going to make you feel worse. So, deciding that there’s no harm in keeping him company for just a little while longer, you allow him to lead the way to the building that he’s been to so many times. 

You know from learning your roommate’s schedule that she’ll be in a lab for the next 3 hours, a fact that makes you feel relieved as you enter your dorm with Leehan trailing behind you. He comes in and immediately collapses onto the couch, spreading his arms out on either side of the cushions in a way that brings renewed attention to his broad shoulders.

“So. Do you actually want to watch a movie?” you ask casually as you stand a few feet away from him, trying your hardest to keep any bitterness out of your tone as you watch him shrug his shoulders nonchalantly.

“You know, now that I’m here…” he says, already smirking as he watches you fight the urge to roll your eyes. “It feels like a much better idea for you to come sit on my lap.”

Even though you find yourself enticed by the invitation, in a small, distant part of your brain, it feels like you’ve been manipulated into letting him come to your room. That watching a movie had always been a lie to get you to have sex with him.

But something has changed inside of you, and from what, you can’t pinpoint. All you know is that the accumulations of lies and divertive tactics that you’ve endured from Leehan thus far has left you almost numb to his provocations. 

Instead of feeling sad or shitty or upset, you just feel nothing. 

And somehow, that change feels more concerning to you than the emotions from before did.

Still, you find yourself stalking silently to Leehan on the couch, his eyes never leaving yours as you make your way towards him. His legs spread naturally as you get between them, and it’s with a jaguar-like slowness that you crawl over his body until you’re straddling him. 

Intensity rolls off of the both of your bodies like water, the silence and shared eye contact only contributing to the growing sexual desire that builds between the two of you.

In contrast to such lust, it’s in a gesture of affection that you lean in to lay a gentle, barely-there kiss against all of the wounds on his face. The cut on his cheek. His busted bottom lip. The knot forming on the top of his head. The bruise on the side of his jaw. You do it almost in apology but also because you want him to tease him, giving him only fleeting touches and kisses before you do anything substantial. He flinches at first at the contact but eventually relaxes into the softness of your lips against him. 

And though you couldn’t articulate the reason why, you get the feeling that he flinches less out of pain, but more in surprise at the unfamiliar gesture of tenderness and how it impacts him. 

You’ve only just reached his neck, sucking hickies into the pale skin there, when you can feel his cock hardening underneath you.

It’s after you’ve kissed every single piece of skin uncovered by his shirt that you decide to relieve a bit of his suffering by reaching a hand down into the waistband of his pants. All you do is close your fist around his shaft and stroke him languidly, but you suppose your teasing worked better than you thought as he whimpers at the simplest of movements. He bucks into your hand, not afraid of seeming desperate and shamelessly moaning at your touch. 

Watching him writhe and shudder beneath you, sensitive in a way you’ve never seen before, it wouldn’t be a stretch to say that this is one of the few times that you’ve felt even a semblance of control in your interactions during sex. It’s always been you on the receiving end of his endless repertoire of tactics, designed always to render you incomprehensible and under the thumb of his persuasion.

Spurred on by the observation, you take advantage of his submission to ask a question that’s been on your mind since you left the hospital. 

“Can I ask you something? Why did you ask Jaehyun who I was with?”

You can just barely make out the expression of surprise that appears faintly behind Leehan’s glassy eyes, and in a tactic that even you admit is slightly contemptible, you never stop the movements of your hand as you await his answer. 

Desperate for even a moment’s worth of vulnerability from him, you hope that by literally dangling his climax in your hands that he’ll be more inclined to be truthful with you.

But for Leehan, giving you the honest answer — that he’s simply a jealous person who can’t stand seeing you with someone else even though it’s hypocritical — would only serve in making you think that his jealousy is a sign of caring, his caring a sign of affection, his affection a sign that he wants to be your boyfriend. 

And though that assessment isn’t as easy to refute as it may have once been when he first met you, it seems idiotic to put any ideas in your head that could lead to him having to admit feelings he isn’t quite sure of yet. 

So, in lieu of the truth, he replies with something that, honestly, should be a bigger concern for him than it presently is: “Because you should tell me if you’re being intimate with someone else. What if you’re not using protection and I catch something?” 

Up until now, you had prepared yourself to react calmly to whatever Leehan’s answer would be, a task you knew would be difficult because the idea of him being jealous at all is in itself insane and backwards.

It was he who insisted that this dynamic be free of any constraints or limitations. 

But the fact that he’s implying you would have sex with someone else and be so reckless as to not make any precautions for your health has your composure breaking, a scoff leaving you as you blurt out, “Have you been honest with me about the people you’re seeing?”

It’s a question you already know the answer to as you still haven’t forgotten the night of the Halloween party, how Jaehyun let it slip that Leehan had been on a date. You’d never confronted him about it because, deep down, you felt that you had no right to. 

But now, he’s placing judgment on you in a way that makes you want to throw all caution to the wind and express your true emotions to him for what seems like the first time.

Hearing the knowing tone in your question has Leehan worried, tilting his head to stare at you as if he’s just now seeing you for the first time. “Are you trying to catch me in a lie, Y/N?” he asks, amusement in his tone though you can tell your questioning rattles him. “I’ve never told you anything that wasn’t true.”

But that’s just because you’ve never told me anything of substance, you think to yourself, reflecting back on all of the times he left your room in a hurry so that he could avoid having to show you anything real.

You continue jerking him off intently, and even though he’s obviously enjoying it, you can tell that you’ve thrown him off. During sex you’ve always maintained this sort of scathing, playful banter, but this time, he knows that your question is motivated by a genuine desire to hear the truth from him. It makes him beyond uncomfortable, especially with his dick still hard and aching in your moving hand. In a sudden change of dynamics, it’s him trying to read what you’re thinking.

Seeing this crack in Leehan’s usually guarded persona spurs you on into saying even more things that you’ve been suppressing. “I know that you’re seeing someone else,” you assert, honesty you never thought you’d be capable of expressing coming out boldly and without ambivalence. “Jaehyun told me, the night of the Halloween party.”

Your eyes are glued to Leehan’s face as you scan for the smallest fluctuation in his expression, searching desperately for any indication of what he’s thinking. And in yet another gesture that might as well be a verbal admission of guilt, Leehan stares up at the ceiling to avoid your gaze. 

Leehan – confident, cool, teasing Leehan – who has always made you feel like you were scared of intimacy for not wanting to make eye contact with him during sex, is now the one shying away the intensity of your gaze. 

The feeling of triumph that comes with finally feeling like you have him at your mercy after months of the opposite has you speeding up the movements of your hand, watching as he almost winces from the overstimulation you provide. 

But more than anything else, you want answers. 

You want to know why he thinks it’s okay to police who else you invite into your bedroom when he clearly does whatever he wants without any regard for you. 

You want him to decisively and plainly decide if he’s either a sadistic asshole who believes that he should be able to treat you like shit while he goes out and fucks whoever he wants—Or if, like you, the passion of this relationship has overwhelmed him so much that he now finds himself feeling things for you that are beyond sexual, things that have caused him to abhor the notion of you being with someone other than him.

It feels like you need the answer to that question more than you need air.

And so, it’s in desperation that your voice comes out shaky as you demand, “Say something.” 

“I can’t,” he manages through gritted teeth, the sound of his voice coming out raspy and submissive making your cunt pulse with arousal. “You’re about to make me come.”

Feeling like he’s being backed into a corner, Leehan wants to tell you to stop, but the euphoria he’s experiencing is too great. He’s never seen you be so assertive, so purposeful in doing things that you know will make him go crazy. 

Rubbing your thumb over his tip. Spitting downward so that the wetness of your spit can reach his cock. Stroking him wildly and meeting his thrusts into your fist. 

Pressure builds in his abdomen until he feels himself about to explode with what might be the most intense climax of his life. 

But in a move that shocks the both of you, it’s just as Leehan is about to finish all over your hand that you abruptly pull off of him. 

Stop the movements of your hand and watch brazenly as the realization of what you just did is processed on his face.

Maybe he thought that you were joking and that this was all just some aggressive manner of foreplay. 

But now, he can see in your shocked expression, how you look so surprised at even your own insistence, that to deny him of his pleasure in this way was something that took a lot out of you. 

It’s been a hallmark of your relationship so far for you to devote yourself to his satisfaction. You’ve always cared so much about being wanted by him, even after he’s shown his disregard for you time and time again.

And so to see you work up the courage to defy him in this way makes it clear to him that you’re not gonna drop this.

This isn’t something that he can smile or flirt his way out of in the hopes of having you wrapped around his finger for just one more day.

You’re gonna force this into being an issue. And fine; if you want to have this conversation, he’ll have it.

Even if it means that by the end of this you'll realize how shitty of a person he is and want nothing to do with him afterward.

If you were still the same pliant, conflict-avoiding Y/N, you’d be alarmed at the change in his expression and how his usual amused smirk melts into a straight-lined frown. You’d transform into the bright-eyed, bushy-tailed girl who’d laugh and pretend that this was all just a way to rile him up into fucking you, hoping that you could forget this moment ever happened.

But it feels like something has been lost in your dynamic that can never be brought back. You’re no longer okay with being lied to, manipulated. And Leehan, realizing how serious you are, seeks to take back control of this situation by flipping your bodies over so that you’re on your back and he’s on top of you. 

He pins your arms above your head, holding them down so you can’t move. 

“Don’t ask questions you don’t want to hear the answers to.”

He says the statement with a warning sort of tone but it only makes you laugh, no longer able to take his provocations and vague answers seriously. “Then don’t try to act hypocritical and treat me like I’m a fucking irresponsible idiot,” you retort, no hint of banter in your words as you hope he understands how serious you’re being, how done you are with his lies. “Having sex with guys without protection and not telling them about it. How do I know you haven’t been doing the exact thing you’re accusing me of?”

You ask a valid question that Leehan sees no way to get out of answering. Clearly, you already know (because of his disloyal, talkative fucking roommate) that he’s been seeing at least one girl that isn’t you. And because he can tell with certainty that your pliance is dependent on at least some kind of honesty from him, he tells you a technical truth when he says, “Since I met you, I’ve only been fucking you. No one else. I swear.”

It’s an answer that protects him from having to further delve into whether he’s seeing anyone else romantically, an important distinction that he isn’t interested in clarifying for the sake of your continued interest in him.

And as he watches you scan his face, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you seek to find any indication of either sincerity or hypocrisy in his expression, he seizes the opportunity provided by your momentary lapse in questioning to reach past the waistband of your leggings, sticking two fingers into your pulsing cunt. 

He watches with satisfaction as even in your bitterness, you still can’t help the way your back arches and your mouth parts naturally at the action. Mirroring your tactics from before, he gives you great satisfaction in exchange for your hopeful compliance. Thrusting his long fingers inside of you, he mumbles in sensual truth, “Your pretty, wet pussy is the only thing that’s been occupying my brain for the last three months.”

The part of your brain that would question the credibility of his words is turned off like a lightswitch as the thrill from his fingers takes over. As much as you try to fight off what you’re experiencing so that you can regain the upper hand, it feels like it’s almost in revenge that he fingers you with such vigor that you can’t speak. 

“Can you say the same? Huh, pretty?” he demands, digits angled just right so that the tips of his fingers repeatedly push against your most sensitive parts. “Tell me I’m the only person whose been fucking orgasms into your cunt.”

You could usually appreciate such possessive sentiments from Leehan when they were spoken in moments where there wasn’t any lingering resentment between the two of you. Now, they only annoy you, causing you to petulantly reply in mocking of his earlier words, “Don���t ask questions you don’t want the answers to.”

And in a move that is surely in imitation of your earlier actions, he pulls his fingers out of you completely and with them, your orgasm. His expression is a handsome mixture of annoyance and frustration. 

It feels like the two of you are in some sort of scornful, unspoken competition, you trying to get him to be honest and him trying to get you to drop this entirely. And all of this undercut by the fact that both really wanna fuck each other, only adding to the frustration of your pleasure being taken away. 

Though your body reels regretfully from the sudden drop in adrenaline, it’s with an unmoved expression on your face that you sit up, making yourself level with him. 

“What?” you retort derisively, amused to find him upset at tactics you only know because he modeled them for you so many times before. “Does it make you mad?”

“No,” he answers, a fierce expression on his face that lets you know despite the desire radiating between the two of you that he’s being serious when he says, “It makes me question the type of person you are.”

And as you poke his chest assertively, you reply, “A person abiding by the standards that you set,” reminding him once more how he lacks the right to feel entitled to your body. 

You again question why he continues to insist that a no-strings attached arrangement is what he wants when it’s clear he doesn’t want you with anyone else.

And so, it’s in your confusion that you ask, “I’m giving you exactly what you want. So why does it feel like you’re punishing me?”

“This isn’t what I want,” he says in reply. And the way that he says it almost quietly, like a stream-of-consciousness that was accidentally blurted out loud, has you inclined to believe that maybe, he’s finally coming around to seeing just how poorly suited this arrangement is for the both of you.

So, it’s with a curious tilt to your voice that you ask, “Then what do you want?”

Looking at you with a sort of urgent, unyielding expression on his face, it’s after a moment of intense and searing silence between the two of you that he leans in to kiss you roughly. What was once a moment of willful competition between the two of you now becomes intense and panicked as the passion of the last few moments takes over your bodies. 

Your hands move in a frenzy as you rush to take off one another’s clothes, and you get the feeling that had the fabric provided any real obstacle, you both would’ve been willing to rip each other’s pants and tops off. Actualizing your desire for one another becomes the most important and serious task to have ever been endeavored upon.

You’ve only just removed your final article of clothing when Leehan crawls between your legs, finding you soaked and pulsing in anticipation of his touch. Noticing this, he can feel himself going crazy with all of the unanswered questions he has about you and Taesan. He finds himself vocalizing these thoughts shamelessly as he mumbles, “Fuck, Y/N. I need you to be honest with me. Because if someone else has had this pussy, I’m gonna go crazy.”

“Make me come, and I’ll give you a straight answer,” you defiantly reply.

Tired of your games, it’s in expression of his growing impatience that Leehan slaps your pussy uncaringly. The act sends a jolt of shock through your body but especially your clit, making you moan in a mixture of both pain and pleasure. 

“I’m serious, Y/N,” he says, and rather than being amused by his insistence like you were before, it's for the first time that you find yourself intimidated, as well as turned on. “Tell me the truth.”

Leehan has always been the leader in your sexual dynamic, but you’d never describe him as rough or dominant until now. Rattled by the change, you aren’t able to manage a reply to his demand, but it’s then that Leehan raises himself up so that your faces are level. 

Making sure to keep his eyes on yours this time, he pushes three fingers inside of your aching cunt — more than you’ve ever taken from him and enough to have your eyes rolling back upon impact.

“Tell me that this pussy is mine,” he demands as he fucks you open with his fingers. You’ve never seen him this fired-up, this crazed, and it has you more turned on and pliant than you think you’ve ever been before. 

His fingers thrust in and out of you with strength you’ve never felt before, and in an amount of time that you find to be pathetic, you can feel your stomach tensing with an approaching climax, moans leaving your mouth with every breath and every curl of his fingers. 

But for the second time tonight, Leehan notices you’re about to come and rips it away from you by withdrawing his fingers entirely. And unlike before, you can’t pretend not to be dismayed as you whimper wistfully at the loss of contact. Leehan, unamused, only stares at you from above and says with finality in his tone, “Tell me the truth, and I’ll make you come.”

You can see now how serious he’s being, how important this is to him, and though you find it entirely irrational, the pulsing of arousal in your body is too strong to ignore. 

“I never fucked him. He never touched me until today.”

“And anyone else besides him?”

“There’s no one else, Leehan,” you assure him, body wracked with the weight of several heavy breaths as you practically beg for him to believe you, to touch you, to relieve the almost painful aching of your cunt. “Just you.”

You’re pleasantly surprised when he doesn't require any additional scrutiny before accepting your answer at face value, muttering an approving “Good girl,” before diving between your legs.

And you guess by the almost hungry, desperate way he then proceeds to eat you out that his easy acceptance of your word is just as much in service to his own desire to taste you as it is to you and your enjoyment. 

Because you find not just in this instance but always that Leehan gives head like his survival is dependent on your arousal. He licks and sucks and mouths at your clit, moaning languidly into your core like it's the best thing he’s ever tasted. 

And as if that’s not enough to have you reeling, he brings his hand out from underneath your thigh and puts two long, crooked fingers back into your dripping hole, thrusting and curling them inside of you like he’s intent on finding the spot that will make you scream. You throw your head back and close your eyes at the feeling that washes over your body, something like electricity pulsing through you and making your legs shake. 

Without intending it, your hips buck against his tongue in chase of your impending orgasm. And when he flattens the wet muscle, allowing you the agency to take your pleasure rather than him having to give it to you, it’s only seconds later when you feel your abdomen contracting with the intensity of your long awaited orgasm. 

You’ve barely recovered from the high of your climax when you hear Leehan saying tauntingly from above you, “See? No one else can do that as good as I can.” He then spreads your legs apart, admiring the mess he’s made of you, slick turning your inner thighs shiny and wet. ”Don’t you know now why you shouldn’t fuck anyone else?

Refusing him the satisfaction of an answer, your only response is to sit up and tell him, “Lay down. I wanna ride you.

Leehan’s only show of resistance to this request is a raise of his eyebrow, but he’s otherwise pliant as you maneuver on the couch so that he’s flat on his back. You hover just below his hard-as-a-rock erection, realizing you should go and get a condom, but it feels like an ultimate test of both your honesty that you assertively inform him, “I’m on birth control.”

Understanding what you mean to imply with this admission, you watch as Leehan’s eyes gloss over, another wave of lust taking over at the notion of having raw sex. In a distant part of your brain that isn’t completely corrupted by wanting, you wonder if this is a good idea given that you have no way of proving whether he’s been honest about his sexual history with other girls.

But as you unconsciously scoot closer and allow his cock to brush against your folds, his encouragement of “Then sit on it,” ringing pleasantly in your ears, the only thing that delays you is your desire to further tauny him. 

“Look at me,” you command passionately, holding on just barely to your own composure as you fight to get these words out amidst your own lust-corrupted brain. “If you stop, I stop. I want you to look in my eyes when I make you come.”

Leehan, either ignorant to how serious you’re being or uncaring, whimpers out your name in lieu of any indication that he understands and accepts what you’re saying. You sink down on him anyway and allow the feeling of being filled to the brim by his long, veiny cock to wipe out any and all thoughts out of your mind. 

“Oh my god, fuck,” he mumbles out in expression of how good it feels, after you’ve only just began bouncing your body up and down his cock. You bear witness to the moment when the embrace of your tight walls becomes too much for him and he throws his head back, disregarding your words from earlier. 

And although it hurts you to do so, makes your thighs burn and your lips part to let out a regretful whimper, you pull yourself upwards until his cock slips out of you completely.

“Open your eyes,” you demand assertively, not just for his sake but for your own, so that you can go back to riding the life out of him until you both can come. “Show me why you deserve this. Remind me why I keep letting you fuck me.”

The scathing remark and the brazen expression you wear as you say it causes Leehan to regain his focus, returning his gaze to yours and making sure to maintain it even as your reinsertion of his cock has him fighting not to shut his eyes closed. It’s with a feeling of regretful foreboding that Leehan realizes this is probably going to end way too soon, that the sickening combination of you riding him, your dominant and sultry words, the view of your body from above him, and the intense unbroken eye contact all work in service to his quickly approaching climax. 

And even as you too feel yourself inching closer and closer to the point of incomprehensible return, you keep talking, feelings that you’ve been suppressing for too long coming out in sultry, brokenly-spoken expressions. “I want you to savor this moment. Memorize how it feels to be inside of me,” you tell him, and then, leaning down to bite the tip of his ear, you whimper, “Fuck Leehan. You’re so big.”

Your purposeful usage of all the things you know for a fact rile him up the most is not lost on him, and it’s almost like you want him to come as quickly and embarrassingly as possible. He lingers on that thought for less than a few seconds, but even just the fleeting idea of spilling his seed inside of you has his brain entering a whole nother level of depraved and uncontrolled, until he’s muttering out the word “Fuck,” in repeated succession and thrusting up into you wildly. “Gonna come,” he announces only seconds later.

“I know you are, baby. And when you do, remember that I can only make you feel this good,” you reply, surprised at your own ability to sound assured and in control in the midst of your own fast-approaching orgasm. But in a way, it feels like you grow more confident the more you watch his verbal and motor skills deteriorate with every bounce and squeeze of your pussy against his cock. 

Making grunting sounds as his thrusts become sloppy and uncontrolled, he replies through gritted teeth, “I know. You’re my favorite girl, Y/N.”

You’ve always hated that term because of the implication it makes that there are other girls with whom he's comparing you to. But as you commit to fighting off all of the weak, vulnerable, sad emotions that have now only rendered you numb, it’s in another show of control that you reply, “Then say it. Tell me how good I’m making you feel.”

At first, you aren’t sure if Leehan can even manage a reply as you watch him grow focused and intent on his approaching orgasm. But it’s through a mixture of muffled grunts and whines, his hips never ceasing their thrusts into you, that he begins to speak.

“Your pussy was made for me. It’s all I ever think about. The sex we have – nghh – it’s the best I’ve ever had,” he tells you emphatically. 

And the brokenness of his words, the way they come out rushed and passionate as if a suppressed part of him needs you to hear them, has you feeling profoundly impacted by the weight of them. 

“You make me crazy, Y/N. I don’t want anyone else. Only you—” 

It’s with one final rough, definitive thrust that Leehan comes inside of you. You’re overcome by the feeling of his hot, warm cum filling your walls, pussy clenching around him as you too experience another orgasm. And as you both recover from your highs, you can feel the atmosphere becoming almost instantaneously stuffy and awkward, the realization of what just happened and all of the things you allowed to come out in the heat of the moment hitting you all at once.

Wanting nothing more than to be released from the clutches of this regretful moment, you pull yourself off of him and wince at the feeling of his cum dripping out of you and onto your inner thighs, some of it spilling onto the couch. 

And without ceremony, Leehan does what he does best – he gathers his clothes and things and begins to put them on as if nothing happened.

The silence that overcomes the two of you as you sit naked and uncovered on the opposite couch, watching him change, is unlike either of you. You’d usually at the very least manage  a few words about how good that was, or small talk about anything fun happening soon on campus. Had Leehan been any good with silence, he might’ve just walked out and not said anything to you at all. 

But it’s because of his own manipulative and egotistical desire to continue to remain in your good graces that he says, in desperation to ease the tension, “Hey. By the way, I’m sorry about the picture I sent you. I don’t usually read your messages, so I didn’t see what you had sent me beforehand.”

You stare at him, a mixture of disbelief and hostility coming over you all at once.

Having completely forgotten about the dick picture incident until now, you feel the emotions from then coming back up in a way that feels shocking given the relative inoffensiveness of his apology just now.

It’s hard for you to pinpoint what exactly about the statement sets you off. 

Maybe it’s that you just had the most intimate, soul-baring sex, and now he’s basically back to reminding you of just how little he values you and your personhood. 

How easy it is for him to completely ignore anything you say to him if it has nothing to do with him and his own pleasure.

And with these emotions more than likely reflected on your face, you watch as Leehan — like a startled deer in headlights — makes what are perhaps the quickest efforts he’s ever done to leave your dorm in a hurry.

“I should get back,” he’s replying coldly as he gets up, throwing his jacket over his body so fast that it folds awkwardly along his sides. “But thanks for this.”

This, he says casually. As if his seed isn’t currently wetting the inside of your legs right now.

“But Leehan, the rain—” you insist. Because you can hear thunder rattling your windows outside and you know that to walk home to his apartment is an entirely irrational notion.

“Don’t worry about me,” he tells you, already halfway to your door as he turns around to look at you, something like regret painted all over his passive expression. “We don’t do that for each other, remember?

And it’s with that last parting, ominous statement that you watch Leehan leave your dorm room without another look in your direction. He’s left your room like this ��� in a hasty blur without a word or an acknowledgement — more times than you can possibly count. 

So why you find yourself overcome with the feeling that this may be the last time you’ll ever see him again, you’re not entirely sure. 

But it’s because of that gnawing, persistent feeling, eating at you like it never has before, that you get up and find a robe to throw over your body so that you can go and find Leehan before it’s too late.

You’re not even sure of what you’re going to say when you find him standing on the outside porch of your building, head down and phone in his hand as he waits for an Uber. All you know is that it’s pouring buckets outside and even with the bit of roofing over your heads, the wind still blows rain onto your bodies, rendering his hair and face wet. 

“Leehan,” you call out, watching as he turns to you and automatically freezes up as he realizes you followed him out here. “Wait. Don’t go.”

It’s at least a little bit understandable why Leehan appears taken-aback by your words and your presence — any other time you’ve had sex, you’ve never once tried to get him to stay behind, even though he could always notice in your expression or quiet intensity that you wanted him to.

So the fact that you’re here telling him not to go, and because of the nature of the sex you just had, it’s like he already knows that you’re planning to pour your heart out to him, and it’s in fear of that that he finds himself saying wearily, “Y/N—”

“No. Let me talk,” you assert before he can finish, a part of you feeling like if you don’t get these words out now, you never will. And so, fueled by the unexplainable feeling that this may be the last chance for you to tell him how you feel, you channel all the confidence you can possible muster and allow all the suppressed emotions from the last three months to spill out without any filter.

“After we have sex, I don’t want you to leave. I want you to stay because you like being with me. I want you to fall asleep with me. I want you to see me and treat me like I’m a human being and not some physical object that you use for sex and nothing else,” you exclaim with a self-pitying scoff.

“And I tried being the chill girl who just goes along with things that are casual. But Leehan, you make me feel things that no one ever has, and it’s not just the sex. For the past few months…it’s felt like my life only truly felt worth living if you were noticing me.”

You can plainly tell by Leehan’s stiff body language and overall lack of reaction that this entire spiel is making him uncomfortable. And as discouraging as the reaction is, now that you’ve started, it feels like you can’t stop until he knows everything that he’s put you through to get to this point.

“And maybe I only feel that way because when we fuck, it’s not like some one-night-stand or throwaway shit. It truly feels like I’m baring my soul to you. And I know that it’s not one sided,” you remark with confidence. Because being in bed with Leehan is the only time when you feel like you can truly understand him. It’s when your hearts, minds, and bodies are in sync and you can both be at your most vulnerable with each other.

“But then you leave, just like you’re doing now. And it makes me feel like the most massive piece of shit you can possibly imagine,” you mumble out with a broken, wet laugh.

Coming to the end of your spiel, you let your arms come down to your sides defeatedly, and with one last imploring look to Leehan’s blank and starry eyes, you ask the question that has been haunting you for the better part of three months now. “So what I guess I want to know is…what is it that’s stopping you from going all in with me? Is it that I’m just…not enough for you to want anything more than sex?” you question, insecurities that have been welling up for so long coming out in a way that has your voice sounding broken. “Or are you just too scared of commitment to allow yourself to feel loved?

“Because that’s exactly what I feel for you. And god dammit, Leehan, but I’m almost 80% sure you feel that way for me too.”

When you’re sure that there’s nothing else left to say and that you got everything you wanted to explain out, it’s with a relieving sigh that your body expels the weight of three months’ worth of pain, sadness, and thoughts of worthlessness. 

And because you know it must be a lot to be on the receiving end of the heaviness of those words, it’s not surprising that the next few seconds after you finish speaking are filled by silence. Watching Leehan stare at you intensely, you allow him the time and the grace to process what he’s heard before you jump to assuming the worst of his silence. 

But then, his first words to you hit you like an icy blast of wind. 

“Y/N, you’re a good person. And the time we’ve spent together has been so much fun for me. But this has always been just that for me…fun. Sex,” he says unambivalently, framing the words delicately though it does nothing to prevent them from hitting you like a freight train. “And I’m sorry if I ever did or said anything that gave you an impression otherwise.

“But honestly, Y/N…” he continues, looking away from you and losing the ability to sugarcoat his thoughts as he expresses, “I told you from the forefront what this was. Why did you say yes if it wasn’t what you wanted?”

He asks a valid question that you unfortunately don’t have the answer to. Because honestly, what were you thinking? Looking back at that moment when he first proposed this arrangement, you have to wonder what possessed you to be delusional enough to think that this would possibly end well.

As embarrassing and humiliating it is to admit, it’s the sex. All those times he told you he desired you, how beautiful you were, how much he wanted you, made you feel like maybe he just didn’t know what he wanted. That eventually he’d come around.

“Because I didn’t think that it was that important to you,” you tell him, feeling your confidence shrinking in real time as your voice comes out quiet and whiny. “I thought…I thought you were changing your mind.”

“I don’t think we should keep doing this, Y/N,” he declares in reply, looking down at the ground in embarrassment. “I like you a lot, but I can’t continue on if I know you have the expectation that this is gonna blossom into something more. I’m sorry, but it’s just not.”

And with that last sobering pronouncement, Leehan runs a hand through his hair, an obviously fake chuckle let out of his lips as he seeks to break the awkwardness of this atmosphere. “This really wasn’t how I wanted this to go,” he mumbles out apologetically, and the way that he stands there stiffly lets you know he wants nothing else than to get away from you right now. 

And sure enough, the sound of a notification going off draws both of your attention to his phone. Like a final dagger to your heart and self-esteem, he’s not even able to hide the relief that floods his expression as he announces, “My Uber’s here, so I just…goodbye, Y/N.”

You watch Leehan step off the porch and into the rain, the lack of light and storm clouds rendering him into nothing more but a blurry, gray silhouette. 

It’s how you will more than likely remember Leehan as you watch him enter the white Mazda that pulls into the driveway. 

Watch the car drive off knowing that you will more than likely never see him again.

He will forever be immortalized in your brain as the stormy force of a presence that came into your life like a tornado, wrecking everything around it and exiting like nothing happened, leaving you a splintered mess of a world to clean up for yourself.

You will be just another Natty, someone Leehan offhandedly mentions to his friends in the car with whoever he chooses to be his next victim, someone he spent a good few weeks with only to never mention them again.

“You’re an enigma, Kim Leehan,” you declared with sincerity. “I don’t want to be your girlfriend either. No offense.”

“None taken,” he replied with breezy indifference, bringing his hand to lay over the one you have on his face. “But don’t say that so easily. You don’t know me well enough yet.”

You rolled your eyes at yet another show of cockiness from him. “And are you saying if I did, I would fall for you?”

Even as his expression remained passive, he replied forebodingly, “Isn’t that usually how these things end?”

He was right.

The next two months of not seeing, talking, or hearing from Leehan go by in a gray-ish, incomprehensible blur.

You complete your classes, managing a passing GPA and thankfully holding on to your scholarship.

You go out to lunch and on study dates with your mutual friends, neglecting to explain why you always need to know who else is coming before you agree to going out.

You attend a couple parties and events on campus, wondering each time whether you’ll run into Leehan and not sure if the rigid feeling over your chest is because of hopefulness or fear at the idea of possibly seeing him. 

And as you pack up your things to get ready to move out for the winter, it feels like you should be over this by now. You spent three months together. Tumultuous, but still only three – it doesn’t seem to make sense why you still feel so hurt.

But you’re now learning that situationships are the hardest to comprehend in their aftermath because it’s hard to know what exactly it is that you’re feeling wistful towards. Leehan isn’t your ex, but he’s also not a friend whom you simply grew apart from. 

He’s another third thing that you can’t quite capture, making it difficult for you to reminisce on your exciting yet tainted memories with one another.

It’s with these thoughts running through your mind that you finish packing your last few items of furniture, readying them to be stowed away in the back of a U-Haul you rented for the day. 

And with your dorm now basically empty, your roommate having moved out a few days before, you can’t help but to view it nostalgically from the vantage point of your doorway, memories of this semester’s escapades coming back to you all at once.

The dresser that you let Leehan stash his condoms in.

Your cheap bed whose loose, metal springs always robbed you of any chance at secrecy in your interactions. 

Moving towards your kitchenette, you stare silently at the flowers he gifted you that one day, still alive despite several weeks of neglect. The little cardboard fish he stuck between the petals makes it appear almost like they’re swimming among colorful, sagging coral reefs.

Your eyes flit over to your couch, where you didn’t know at the time would be the last place he fucked you before he’d never talk to you again.

Going over these memories in your mind, it makes sense then why when you hear a knock resounding on your door, the first thing you think of is Leehan.

But surely, you’re just caught up in the emotions caused by the sudden moment of reflection; it has to be an RA, or a neighbor about to ask if they can borrow a broom and dustpan.

When you go to open your door, you don’t consider for a second that on the other end could be the one person you’re not prepared to see right now.

So when it swings open and you’re greeted by a straight-faced, wide-eyed Leehan, whose body is relaxed against the side of your door, it feels like all of the air is knocked out of your body.

“Hi,” he says plainly, straightening his posture when he sees you staring at him staggeringly. To say that you feel conflicted as you take in his handsome, tall form would be beyond an understatement. It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long since you’ve seen each other, and it’s almost like he could tell you right now that he’s here because he wants to fuck you and it would feel normal, like nothing has changed between the two of you.

But even in just making that mental observation, you feel angry and resentful that such a dynamic was normalized among the two of you for so long that you convinced yourself it was okay to be treated that way.

And as you stew in those feelings of renewed bitterness and frustration, you find yourself suddenly and strongly opposed to him being here, asking bluntly, “What is this? Why are you here?”

“I’m here to apologize,” he answers with an imploring look, and habitually you study his expressions in the hopes of discerning whether he’s being sincere or not.

But it’s with a feeling of resignation that you realize how done you are with trying to constantly read his mind and understand what motivates his decisions.

Because the same way there’s a chance that he really did show up here with good intentions, there’s just as equal a chance that he wants you to trust him again so that he can get his dick wet.

And so, in a move that brings you an immature level of satisfaction, you close the door on his face without another word.

You hear him exclaiming loudly “Y/N, wait!” on the other side of the door but you’ve already made up your mind, deciding that whatever he has to say isn’t worthy of your time or attention.

You’re done with his manipulative behavior, with his aloofness and undeserved self-assuredness, but most of all you’re tired of being made to feel like shit. And that’s all he ever did in those few months that you were sleeping together.

As you retreat to your bedroom, you go to return to packing your things, but the adrenaline from the passing moment makes your hand shake and your body pulse energetically. You need a second to pause and breathe and process what’s just happened, to walk around and pace away all of this unresolved energy. 

But then you turn around to go back out into your living room, and that’s when you see Leehan standing right outside the arch of your bedroom doorway.

“Jesus fucking christ, Leehan!” you exclaim in a mixture of both surprise, frustration, and confusion as you wonder whether he broke in or if you—

“You left the door unlocked,” he replies calmly, and even though he knows he has a lot to make up for, he still can’t help the smirk that comes to his face as he jokes, “Kinda 101 not to do that if you don’t want someone coming in. That’s like me leaving the filter of my fish tank —”

“Get out, Leehan. Get out! I have nothing left I want to say to you!” you shout, impatient and uncaring to his jokes and his dimples and everything else about him that used to charm you. It’s all meaningless to you now, and you don’t care if you look crazy or unhinged when you go to physically push him out of your dorm.

But even with the nonchalant, noncommittal way he holds onto your wrist to restrain you, you still only manage to move him a few steps, much to your dismay and rage.

And so, in a heat-of-the-moment, emotionally driven decision, you move to close your bedroom door on his face. While successful in keeping him out of your bedroom, you don’t even realize until seconds later that he’s still free to roam in your hallway, kitchenette, and living room, while you’ve essentially just locked yourself in.

Predictably, you can hear Leehan chuckling outside of your door as he makes this same realization.

“You know, if it was your goal to get me to leave, then I’m not sure locking yourself in your room really…” he begins to say, not able to keep the amusement out of his voice at the foolish mistake on your part. But, remembering the reason why he came here in the first place, he tones it down to say soberly, “Nevermind. It doesn't matter.”

You walk over to the side of your bedroom that’s opposite from the doorway, sitting down on the floor, determined to tune out whatever it is that Leehan is about to say. Maybe if you stay silent and let him tire himself out, he’ll eventually leave knowing that there’s nothing he can say to make up for how he’s made you feel.

“I”m not super good at explaining myself, or talking at all, honestly. I go on tangents and my mind is just…a giant fucking minefield. So I wrote down what I wanted to tell you.”

Leehan’s voice is distorted but nonetheless able to be heard clearly through the thin wood that makes up your door, so much so that you can clearly hear the crumpling noises of a paper being unraveled as he starts to read. 

“If you’re listening to me read this, it’s because I somehow managed to convince you to hear me out. Either that, or I broke into your dorm, which feels like the more likely option,” he says with almost no emotion behind the words, and against your own discipline, you can feel your lips twitching into a smirk automatically in reaction to his strange, off putting way of speaking.

“I know my insistence can come off as crass given how shitty of a person I’ve been to you. But I knew that today was move-out day, and I needed you to hear me out before you left.”

You hear him take a deep breath before continuing with the next part of his speech. “As you know, I’m a pretty fearless person. But when it comes to admitting my feelings for you, I’ve had a much harder time. Truthfully, since I met you, it’s been because of my own immaturity that I’ve seen other girls romantically. Even though I always knew my feelings for you were different, I pushed them away in the hopes of avoiding having to commit to anyone. When you told me how you really felt for me, truthfully, it scared me. I didn’t want to know what my life would look like if I decided to be with just one person.

“I thought that by rejecting you, by being away from you for this long, that my feelings for you would go away,” he remarks with the same sort of unfeeling, neutral tone to his voice, as if he knows the explanation behind his actions is unimportant given how they’ve impacted you. “I wanted to view you as just another name on a long list.”

But it’s with his next words that passion and sincerity and longing bleed into his voice all at once to say, “But it’s taken me this time of being away from you to realize that…I’m still not over you.”

After minutes of hanging onto his every word despite every inclination that has been telling you to do otherwise, it’s those last five words that hit you like a freight train. 

And you know it’s foolish and dumb to be believing anything that comes out of his mouth anymore, but you suppose it’s no different from all of the other times you continued to let him in even when he showed you so many times why you shouldn’t. 

Your reasoning remains the same – you just feel an irrational pull to him that is all-consuming, your heart connected to his in a way you can’t control. 

And it doesn’t help that everything he says next is all of the affirmation you’ve been wanting and needing him to give you throughout your entire time of sleeping together. “You deserve someone that’s going to treat you with respect. Someone that makes you feel loved and beautiful and desired. Someone with the courage to be vulnerable and who will care for you in your most vulnerable moments. And I’m sorry if you felt like you didn’t have that with me,” he remarks, and you don’t even realize you’ve been holding your breath throughout his spiel until your chest literally contracts from the lack of air to your lungs.

“But if you can find some way to forgive me, then I want to make us work,” he asserts pleadingly. And with the finality that it feels like follows that statement, you get the feeling that what he says next is no longer being read off the paper. 

Especially when you can hear what you think is the top of his head, leaned against the door with a small thunk as he quietly laments, “I want you, Y/N. Not just sexually, but for everything that makes you who you are. It’s always been you. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it.” 

It’s quiet after that, so much so that you can hear his small and broken breaths being let out against the wall. You hear what you think is the sound of his hand being brought up to rest next to his head. And as the feeling of being pulled in so many directions takes over you, your heart in a heated battle with your brain, it’s after a few moments of silence that you stand up and walk over towards the door. 

Leehan, observing the shadows of your footsteps through the little gap at the bottom of the door, perks up when it’s just a thin barrier of wood that keeps you from being face-to-face with one another.

You prepare yourself to be annoyed when you open the door in expectation that he will be his usual unreadable, unserious self. 

But it’s in surprise but also a little relief that what you find when you face him is the expression of a man who’s truly understood the gravity of his mistakes and feels shameful over them.

“You look really pretty,” he blurts out, the suddenness of the remark almost betraying your slowly but surely growing feelings of understanding towards him. But you also can’t help that his random candor makes you laugh, reminded of some of your earlier interactions as he sheepishly says, “Sorry, bad timing.”

Still standing a fair distance away from him, the tip of your toes just barely meeting the tip of his as you look down at them to avoid eye contact, you attempt to ease the tension of the moment with a shy but truthful, “Thank you, Leehan. For the compliment and for the apology.”

You can feel the heat of his gaze as he tilts his head to stare at you, his attention feeling hopeful but not in a way that makes you feel pressured, but in a way that has you compelled to be completely vulnerable and honest with him.

“I’m just…really scared that you’ll hurt me,” you confess somberly, and it still feels strange to even say things like this to him because you’ve spent so much time suppressing your negative emotions when it comes to Leehan. Scared that you’d lose his approval and feeling like you needed such approval to feel good about yourself.

But over time as your relationship progressed and you found yourself little by little regaining the sense of self that your interactions with Leehan robbed you of, you were able to realize that you didn’t deserve to be treated like an afterthought, like an object only useful if it was giving satisfaction to someone else.

And it was in resentment that over these two months of not speaking you felt like Leehan believed that, too.

But now after hearing him explain himself and believing genuinely that he wants to be with you, you now battle with the parts of you that are scared to believe him in fear of getting hurt and the parts of you that so badly also want to be in a relationship with him.

“I’m not scared,” he tells you, the confidence you’ve come to know him for coming out more strongly than ever before. “I’ve got you, remember?”

He then goes to place his two middle fingers underneath your chin, pushing your jaw upward so that you’re forced into eye contact. Staring into his endless and piercing eyes, it’s for the first time that you feel like you understand him in a non-sexual context. “Is that supposed to mean something to me?” you mumble quietly in reply.

And it’s as you feel your lips twitching into a content smile that Leehan leans in to kiss you, and you accept the gesture without question.

five months later

“I wanna go half on a baby with you.”

These are the words that Leehan remarks to your sleeping form as you lay comfortably beside him in bed, sleeping but getting roused into attention by the faint sound of his voice.

“A fish baby, of course,” he clarifies, though you don’t even register what he’s saying as you remain half-asleep. “I think the ones in my tank are getting lonely.”

It’s hard to tell sometimes whether Leehan is musing out loud to himself or talking directly to you, but either way, the deep tone of his voice wakes you up just the same. 

You lay on your stomach, opening one eye to find him sitting up on his elbow and staring down at you with a curious expression on his face. His hand, resting on your back, draws unintelligible figures on the skin that’s left uncovered by your night shirt. 

All in all, it's a pretty domestic, intimate scene, had you not glanced over at your phone to find how early it was.

“Leehan, it’s seven a.m,” you complain to your boyfriend who still just stares dreamily at your sleepy figure. “What are you yapping about?”

Too familiar with your morning grumpiness to be phased by it, it’s with an unmoved expression that Leehan casually replies, “Just about how much I want a baby with you.”

When you hear those words come out of Leehan’s mouth, you’re sure you must still be asleep and that this is just an incredibly vivid dream. Either that, or you’re dating the strangest person in the world. 

Given that both realities are entirely plausible, it’s in your tiredness and confusion that you sit up from the bed completely, staring at a relaxed Leehan with raised eyebrows. “Don’t you think we’re a little young for that? I mean eventually, sure, but while we’re in school—”

“I was talking about fish,” he interrupts you to say, chuckling at your confused expression and giggling again when you pout at being laughed at. “But since you’re so eager, why don’t I put a baby in you right now?”

Your own laughter in reaction to his words is suppressed when he presses a large hand on your stomach, pushing you back down on the bed. He leans in to kiss you, but per usual, you refuse to make things easy for him.

Reaching behind your head, you grab a pillow and smack him in the face with it, creating a barrier between your bodies. “You’re such a weirdo,” you playfully quip, a designation he only takes in stride as he goes to throw the pillow somewhere on the floor.

“I’m your weirdo though,” he emphasizes, and it’s as you’re both smiling in satisfaction that he leans in to press his lips against yours.

And as his cold hands roam your warm body, you’re hit with a sudden wave of happiness as you acknowledge how far gone the days of having to wish for him to stay even fir minutes after you’ve had sex truly are. 

Because in the past five months since you’ve gotten together exclusively, not only is it routine for him to stay behind, but you also get to wake up together and experience these sleepy, romantic moments. 

The moments when he slowly kisses down your body, dragging his plush lips down your sternum until he’s positioned between your legs.

The moments when you pull softly at his hair as he languidly drags his tongue up and down your folds, begging you in his gruff, sleep-affected voice to come all over his face.

The moments when you could be sponning sideways, on top of him, or below him and he’ll still find a way to spread your legs apart, pressing his long, veiny cock inside of you until you’re overwhelmed by how full you are. 

The moments where his tiredness renders him impatient and he fucks into you so roughly that you can barely form words. 

The moments when he kisses you lazily through every thrust until the sex becomes so good that all you can manage is the occasional swipe of your tongue against his lips or a whimper into his mouth.

The moments when you reach your climax together and he rocks his come in and out of you like he never intends on pulling out.

The moment when you moan out his name, understanding why when you first met he insisted that to know it was a privilege. That to know him is a privilege.

And finally, your favorite, the moments when you either fall back asleep in each other’s hold or get up to shower the sleepiness and sweat off of each other. 

Today is one of those days that you relent to getting up and showering, convinced only by the fact that neither of you has a morning class, making it a perfect day to visit the pet shop conveniently located just a few miles from your college town.

“What about this one?” 

You turn to face Leehan in the fish tank lined aisle of the pet store, lips curling into a smile as you observe him pressing his face up to the glass in awe. As you come up to his side to view the brown-colored fish that have him so captivated, it’s in a surge of honesty that you reply, “Don’t you think they’re kind of…ugly?”

You fight the urge to roll your eyes as you watch your boyfriend gasps dramatically in reaction to your words, even brushing his hand against the fish tank in a gesture akin to patting someone's head. “They can hear you, you know. I’m so sorry, fishies.”

Ignoring his childishness, you look around at the surrounding fish and sigh as you’re overwhelmed by all the different options. “Honestly, Leehan, you should just pick one. They all look the same to me.”

“But it should be something we both like,” he answers with a pout, circling the aisles a few more times before finally stopping at a tank in the very corner. 

Inside of it are an array of multi-colored fish, but the one that stands out to you is an entirely white one with a patch of vibrant red at the top of its head. 

It would be indistinguishable from a goldfish had it not been for its striking color and the appendage that looks almost like an inside-out brain on its head. 

A label beside the tank reads Oranda. 

“What about this one?” asks Leehan in curiosity, and in an almost alarming way, he points out the exact same fish you were just eyeing. 

You come around to the other side of the tank to view it from another angle, giggling innocently when you make eye-contact with Leehan through the distorted lens of the water. “It’s pretty,” you remark simply, and because Leehan has come to know you so well, he knows that the simple attribution is a sign of high praise from you.

“Should we make it ours?” he asks you officially, and though you’re certain that this is the fish you’ve been looking for, there’s one question popping up in your brain that you still can’t find the answer to.

“What should we name it?”

You both take a beat to ponder on the question. Leehan chimes in first, blurting out, “I know. Loony.”

At this, you scoff, unsure as to where he would have gotten such an idea from. “Are you trying to say that our child is crazy?” you quip in feigned offense. 

“No. It’s short for lunar eclipse. That’s when I knew we were gonna be more than just a one night stand,” he tells you sincerely, and with that context you find yourself becoming quickly attached to both the name and the fish who you take home in a plastic bag only moments later.

You allow Leehan to take the lead in homing Loony, a process that involves lots of complicated jargon about adjusting the water temperature and changing the salinity that you mostly pretend to understand as he explains it to you. 

And when you are finally able to sit side by side in front of the tank and watch through the glass as Loony swims among the other fish, it’s with an adoring tone of voice that you hear Leehan say, “It’s pretty, awesome, right?”

At the sound of his voice, you turn to face him, and without being entirely conscious of it, you simply take in his features and how content he looks to be here, with you and with these fishes.

“Yeah,” you reply, laying down and resting your head on his shoulder. “It’s awesome.”

taglist: @lailols @papichulomacy @0310s @softiwoon @gardenforwon @cherrytaesan @mryuyux @saintriots @lonelylandofan @cyber-tiny @keyywrld @isabellah29 @amerecerasus @cadidupped @suhovhs @lionhanie @taesanmoon @revelettre @s9nwoo @brachioswrld @moneygal0re @karatttttt

thank you all sm for your support on this fic <3 your reactions, feedback, and compliments have meant the world

[lordprettyflackotara]

Kinktober Official’s Line up by LordprettyflackoTara :)

October 1st: Nectar of the gods w Colby Brock (full fic)

October 2nd: Did it First w yandere!Jeff the Killer

October 3rd: The Perfect Pair w Masky (blurb)

October 4th: Did it First w yandere!Jeff the Killer (Part Two)

October 5th: Easy Silence w Sam Golbach (fluffy smut)

October 6th: Make a Move w Eyeless Jack

October 7th: Noise/Freakypasta au with Homidical Liu ft a secret guest

October 8th: Freaky Friday w the proxies (blurb)

October 9th: Decode w Ticci Toby (Part Two)

October 10th: Comfortable w Draco Malfoy (blurb)

October 11th: Super Rich Kids w Sam and Colby

October 12th: Dance w the Devil w Ticci Toby and Kate the Chaser (Cat Hunter fic has been scraped)

October 13th: Danger w Masky and Eyeless Jack

October 14th: I miss the misery w Mattheo Riddle (blurb)

October 15th:Heard about us w Colby Brock (blurb)

October 16th: Kehlani w ?

October 17th: Blue w Masky

October 18th: 6 Inch Heels w the proxies

October 19th: Professional w Ben Drowned

October 20th: Sharp Fangs w Sam and Colby (Part Three)

October 21st: World class Sinner w Jeff the killer and Jane the killer

October 22nd: Mr.Take your bitch w Ben Drowned (blurb)

October 23rd: Get him back! w Sam Golbach

October 24th: Red sex w Jeff the Killer (blurb)

October 25th: Double Fantasy w Fred Weasley & Draco Malfoy

October 26th: Weasley whore with Fred & George Weasley

October 27th: american dream w eyeless jack (blurb)

October 28th: Hostage w Bloody Painter

October 29th: Sharp Fangs w Sam & Colby finale

October 30th: Deja Vu w Hoodie

October 31st: Follow you (prologue) with Eyeless Jack

[mrsriddles-blog]

Reads of the Week: Feb 11-Feb 17

*indicates smut

it’s you by @crimsntwlip

Sea Foam by @gemissleeping

Just A Glimpse Of Us by @musingsofahufflepuff

i waited by @kelstey

Is it New Years Yet by @writingsbychlo

next time* by @ggwendolyn

red roses by @littlebookbengal

azúcar. by @theostrophywife

Deja Vu* by @kelstey

Winter Blues by @bettymylove

Messy* by @angelfrombeneth

Just A Glimpse Of Us by @musingsofahufflepuff

Final Blow by @zriasstuff

The Painters Muse by @anawritez-posts

Bubblegum Pink* by @pinkinku

Pick up the phone by @tomriddleslove

Off-limits* by @theosbaby

Birthday Princess* by @theosbaby

Boundaries by @anawritez-posts

[whxre-bxby]

Could you please do a recom Brown smut? I have tried to find some about him but I never can seem to find some... Btw I have fallen in love with your work!!! You are an amazing author and I look forward to reading more from you!!! Love you😘😘

Love you too <3

"Maybe Blue Isn't So Bad"

Recom Brown x  Recom Y/N 

Summary: The recom's are struggling to adapt to their new bodies. It hits Y/N the worst. She gets injured during a mission and Brown takes care of her. They talk about it before realising how touched-starved they are. Knowing their problems are difficult to solve, they fuck their worries away.

WARNINGS: SMUT, fluff, angst, hurt and comfort, mentions of blood, pet name mama, breeding kink (no mating with tsaheylu), recom's identity crisis, tears

Masterlist

Word count: 5241

The helicopter landed at our base and I was the first to haul myself from the side and try to run inside. 

This was one of the most intense missions I’d ever experienced and I was not taking it well.

“Woah, hold on there sweetheart.” Quaritch shouted over the dying engine of the aircraft. I stumbled forward, falling to my knees on the hard concrete and wrapping an arm around my stomach. I felt like throwing up but nothing was happening. 

Immediately a pair of hands came to my aid, steadying me while I crouched down. Another pair moved the hair out of my face in case I did puke. 

Everyone had gotten off now, taking all the gear with them and they were standing in a group, waiting for orders and waiting for me to get up. 

No one felt relaxed after seeing what we just did, but since I got the worst of it, my mind was scattered. 

After about a minute of me breathing through my discomfort and the Colonel handing out tasks and orders,  I was able to open my eyes and sit back on my knees. 

“Help ‘er up.” Quaritch ordered and Lyle who stood next to me, making sure I was alright pulled me to my feet by holding me under my arms. 

I lean against him and then Brown comes around my other side, offering me more stability. I hold on to his shoulder and Lyle hands me off to him before helping Ja with the heavy gear. 

We’re all waiting for further instructions now.

“Alright, you lot join Wainfleet up on deck. We’re not done for today.” he says, talking to the others. 

Miles turns to me, letting out a small sigh and looking at me with a glimpse of pity in his eyes. 

“Y/N you’re dismissed.” he says, waving it off. I can’t answer him I only slightly nod, facing the ground as my head spins. 

“Stay with her and help ‘er out.” he says to Brown who is firmly holding me and he nods before directing his attention back to me. 

“Alright, get movin’. We don’t have all day!” Quaritch shouts, and the others start to walk inside. Most of them glance at me with worried expressions. It was clear to see that I was not okay. At least we were safe for now.

Quaritch nodded at Brown before motioning Lyle back to me. Both men stretched my arms over their shoulders and helped me walk inside while Miles walked beside us. As our superior, his top priority was obviously successfully completing the mission but also our safety and well-being. He could tell I had gotten a bad handful of things today and he was silently cursing himself for not having everyone covered at all ends. Now you had to suffer the consequences of his little mistake. 

We got inside and I was dropped off in a medical room. There were three beds and they placed me on the side of one. 

I sat, hunched over with my tail loosely hanging off the side while holding my face in my palm. 

Quaritch said a few things to Brown before he and Lyle left the room. When the door closed behind them there was almost complete silence and it calmed me down. Compared to the roaring engine and the… monster, we just encountered, this was heaven. 

Then I heard plastic wrappers and looked up to see Brown facing away from me, opening the medical kit on a table while I tried to keep balance on the thin hospital bed. 

I looked around the room noticing it was empty apart from the cabinets full of medicines and samples. The large glass windows were covered with blinds and the ceiling lights were illuminating the stripes on my now… blue skin. 

Right… I wasn’t human anymore…

Brown finished putting together whatever he was doing and turned around, walking towards me. 

My eyes were struggling to adapt to the bright lighting in the room and my body started slowly falling to the side. 

Before I could completely lose balance and tumble down, a large arm wrapped around my side, pulling me back into my previous sitting position. 

“Careful, don’t want you hurting yourself more.” he chuckled, slowly letting go. 

“Yeah, my bad.” I mumble, palming my forehead. He flashes me a smile before rearranging the items in his hands. One of them is a wet wipe drenched in alcohol and the other a wrapped-up bandage. 

Brown crouched down in front of me, gently lifting my injured leg so that my heel was resting on his knee.

“This’ll sting.” he warned before pressing the cloth against the large slash I had on my calf. I whimpered, biting down on my lip before I got used to it. But I knew he had to clean it properly. He pulled it away for a second before starting to wipe the blood away while gliding the stinging cloth through the open flesh. 

My whole body tensed and I lay back, biting my fist while digging my nails into my hand. God, this hurt as much as when the wound was made. 

“Sorry.” he breathily said, feeling a little guilty even though he knows he is helping me.

“It’s fine-” I squeaked out, clenching my eyes closed. “Just get it done.”

He nodded, looking back down at my leg again after noticing how my tail was repeatedly thudding against the metal railing on the side. This was pure agony.

He continued cleaning the wound, trying to hurry it up for me and when he was done I relaxed back, covering my face with my arms and breathing heavily. 

Brown chuckled, gently wiping down my entire leg to clean it off from blood. 

“There. Done. Wasn’t that bad now was it?” he sarcastically asked, grinning down at my half-dead self. 

I snort in response, feeling like I’ve won the battle of a lifetime. He smiles before putting the cloth to the side and starting to wrap the bandage around my leg. 

Slowly I lift my body and sit up, watching his hands encircle my massacred leg with the remaining bandage until it’s gone. 

I admired how gentle he was, especially because I knew usually he wasn’t.

Brown was the type of guy that would fist-bump his friends. That included chest bumps in the air too. When teasing a guy he would headlock them and rub his fist in their hair. He was also quite competitive, his main goal usually being beating Prager and Ja in physically challenging tasks. 

But now, he was wrapping my leg in such a manner as if it were made of extremely thin glass that could break if he pulled too tightly. He also made sure his fingers would not brush against my wound.

A soft smile formed on my face when he finished, tucking the last strand under another. 

“Thank you.” I say and it almost sounds like a whisper.

His eyes looked up, searching for my face and he found me already looking at him. The same smile was mirrored on his face now before he got up to put the bloody wet wipe away. 

“No need, can’t have you injured like this for too long. ‘Team needs you. Especially now that we know you can run like hell.” he spoke, ending his sentence with a chuckle.

I scoff, smiling. “My life depended on it.” 

He nods understandingly, looking down.

I sigh, letting my shoulders slump before scoffing at my thought. 

“It’s ironic really. There I was, running for my life from a Thanator when I spend my days and nights wishing I never woke up like this.” 

Brown’s head shoots up to meet mine at my words while a tired smile forms on my lips. I didn’t want to live like this. I hated how I looked and who I was now but at the same time I hated who I used to be and the memories I had from that person who is probably dead for good reason. 

“Don’t say that.” he replies, leaning against the table to face me. “We’re getting a second chance here. Let’s make the most of it.” 

“But we’re not making the most of it.” I say, almost cutting him off. People were constantly saying that but it made no sense because almost nothing has changed except our bodies. 

“We’re doing the exact same thing that got us killed.” 

My voice was breaking and he caught on to it. Everyone was struggling with this new change a little but they hid it. I however couldn’t anymore. 

“The same thing is going to happen and now I feel even worse doing all that because this god-forsaken body makes me feel connected to the world out there.” I start spiralling, running a hand through my hair, although it gets caught in the braids that I’m also not used to. 

He stays silent, letting me get rid of the weight on my shoulders but I can tell my words affect him. 

“And no one is questioning what we’re doing because this is what we were built for, right? I mean, the only reason they brought us back is to finish what they started but we have no real reason to do so.” I continue to rant while my eyes sting and nose sting, slowly welling up with tears. 

“What would they do if I said no? Would they shoot me? Wipe my memory and try it again?”

“No, they wouldn’t do that…” Brown says, trying to comfort me but he himself sounds unsure. 

“I just-” I say with a sniffle. “I feel so, unreal. We’re artificial. It’s like we’re not actually living.” 

The room is silent for a while as both of us blankly stare at the ground. He isn’t objecting to what I’m saying so I assume he understands and maybe thinks the same. But we both know there isn’t much we can do. And that’s what has me so frustrated and helpless.

Brown sighs before walking over to me. 

He wanted to comfort me as best he could. That included holding me to him or basically anything with physical touch. He felt so deprived of that and he knew you must too. Your purpose of being alive was completing the mission, so all recoms were constantly being given orders, tasks and instructions. There was always something to do and figure out that everything else was completely neglected. There were no breaks for us, only sleep. 

He stands in front of me while I peered down at my dangling legs. When I saw his ones stop in front of me I let my glossy eyes meet his. 

Brown held out his hand and it took me a good few seconds to catch on to what he was doing. I put my palm in his, thinking nothing of it and longing for any comfort I can get. He closed his hand, looking at me with a saddened expression. 

“Can I hug you?” he asked, seeming completely genuine. His words took me by surprise. If you would have asked me to rank all the recoms from most likely asking me that to least likely, he would have definitely been at the bottom of least likely. Not because he was the last person I wanted to hug but because he never showed any kind of physical affection at all except for his moves with his friends like the chest bumps and headlocks. But one would never see him patting anyone on the back or anything similar to that. Perhaps he just had no one to give physical affection to. 

His eyes raced between mine as he tried to fish out the answer from my reaction before I could say it. My hesitation had him worried he overstepped a boundary and he tensed, almost shrinking away from me. 

I however held his hand firmly, knowing I needed this hug more than anything. 

“Yes please.” I whisper and his eyes shoot up to mine in surprise. His ears perked forwards and his tail stilled. 

He smiled, taking a step forward and I opened my legs just so that he could step between them and hug me comfortably. The bed was up to his waist so I was almost as tall as him. 

He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into him. I did the same, flattening my hands on his back as I rested my head on his shoulder. He leaned his head against mine and I realised how badly I needed this physical attention. It just made it better that it happened to be him. 

My waterworks get going again and I feel my bottom lip wobble before I sniffle and bury my face in the crook of his neck. He relaxes into me, pulling us further together and one of his hands comes up to cradle my head. Tears flow from my eyes as I let out small muffled sobs, subconsciously wrapping my legs around him because I didn’t want this to end. 

He let his head fall and rest on my shoulder while his arms completely embraced me. 

While calming down in the safety of his arms, I didn’t notice that my own touch-starved body was responding in another way. Heat started to form between my legs but I didn’t realise it because of the pain in my heart and the overwhelming thoughts in my head. 

Maybe it was because we were so close. His hips were very close to mine and my body seemed to crave more than just a hug even though in my head, this was more than I could ever ask for. 

I had my face pressed against his clothed shoulder, inhaling his now stronger scent. Maybe that’s what caused the excitement in me but I refused to acknowledge it. 

Whether you ignored it or not didn’t matter because Brown had noticed it. He was fighting his own battle of being neglected by touch so having you wrap yourself around his body like this was heaven. When he rested his head on your shoulder he inhaled your sweet scent and had to fight the urge to bury his face into your neck and inhale more of it. He didn’t want to overstep any boundaries because you two were hugging and it was a beautiful moment he wouldn’t dare ruin for you. 

If you only hug him, he will make sure to keep it just as you want and won’t initiate anything more. However, he will pay more attention to your reactions, just to see whether you might be feeling what he is. Maybe you can even feel him. He knew he was getting worked up and was terrified of scaring you away if you felt what was growing in his pants. 

My mind started drifting off as I clung to him and my sniffles turned into heavy breathing. 

Brown’s ears were strained in my direction, listening to any noise I made as best he could.

He took note of how my body seemed to grow warmer and then suddenly, he heard what sounded like a pant. Then again and it kept repeating until he knew he wasn’t mistaken. 

To test how you reacted to him, he traced his fingertips along the exposed skin your tank top left, on your back. This could be seen as an innocent action, so he put it to the test. Seeing goosebumps rise on your skin had him smirking and he felt his dick throb. Fuck, he was down bad too. 

Brown gently pulled away, steadying you in front of him so he could look at you properly. Your glossy eyes, parted lips and flushed face made him forget how to breathe for a few seconds. You were so beautiful and like this, you looked even better. Your sweet scent suddenly filled his nostrils again but this time it was stronger and his instincts told him it was radiating from a special part of your body. 

“Y/N…” he said, his usually raspy voice turning soft. My eyes shot up to his, watching how he scanned every feature on my face. 

“How do you feel?” he asked. 

I wasn’t sure what he meant. I mean, I knew what the question meant and I was ready to give him the simple answer of good but the way he looked at me hinted that he meant it in a different context. 

“Better?” I say, unsure if that’s what he meant. It seemed to solve something for him but not everything.

He sighed, taking a deep breath to steady himself. As if he were really struggling to hold himself back from doing something. Seeing him like this, made me imagine the best-case scenario but I didn’t want to expose my thoughts. 

“I can smell you…” he breathily replied in a strained voice. His ears were tipped back, only perking forward every time I made a noise or a new movement. I also noticed how the muscles in his arms flexed.

I was about to ask whether he needed medical attention until his own musk filled the air around me. It was always there and I always knew what he smelled like but now it was stronger than ever and it made my core throb. 

I wanted to curse myself for reacting so desperately.

My eyes widened when I met his again and he seemed to know exactly what I was thinking about.

“Don’t ignore it. Look at how it ended this time.” he said and I understood even though I think it wasn’t going too badly. I mean I got my hug. 

“What if next time someone else will be here instead of me? I don’t want that happening.” he said and my mouth dropped open a little more. Was that a confession?

“If you don’t want me here, I can go.” he said, noticing my agonising silence. My heart raced in panic because that was the last thing I wanted. 

“No-” I quickly say and Brown feels relief flood his body. “I want you here with me.” 

His tipped-back ears perk forward once again as he reruns the words in his head. 

“No one else but you.” I added. Those words really got to him, especially because he was so competitive with the others. He needed to know you wanted him as much as he wanted you. 

“Can I touch you?” he asks. Yes, we did just hug and hold each other but I know he means it in a different way this time. In a way that has me rubbing my thighs together. 

Seeing me do that has his heart skip a beat. He could only dream of what you felt and looked like. 

“Yes.” I whisper and he shakily exhales before his hands attach themselves to my legs. He places them on my knees, pushing my legs apart and stepping in between them to prevent me from closing them again. 

I hold him there by encircling his legs with my own. He’s so close to me again but this time, his face is inches from mine. Brown’s slightly dilated pupils stare into mine and I let my palm find his cheek to guide him down to me. He complies, leaning in and closing the gap between us. Our lips press against each other and what started off as a soft kiss testing the waters, became a breathy and panted make-out session. 

His tongue had slipped past my lips and I parted them further, not dreaming of ever denying his access. 

My hands closed in tight fists around the neckline of his shirt while his hands glided down my waist, groping the skin of my hips and holding me close. 

With every second that passed we felt our needs grow and it seemed to only get worse and more desperate. 

I pulled away for air because my mind was becoming fuzzy and I couldn’t think straight. 

Brown smirked, still holding me while I panted. He did the same but I seemed more out of breath. 

“You have no idea how bad I want you right now.” he whispered, allowing himself to finally press his face into your neck before kissing it. I tilted my head to the side while my arms loosely wrapped around his neck before gasping when I felt him nip at my skin. 

My body feels like it’s on fire and all my clothes start to bother me so I find the base of my top and start pulling it up and over my head. Brown pulls back, watching me with a smile. 

I hook my fingertips under my sports bra before looking at him, noticing he is only watching. 

“Don’t just stand there, take it all off.” I hastily say, needing to feel his bare skin against mine. 

My bold words surprise him but it’s such a turn-on for him. 

“Damn mama, do that again and I won’t last as long.” he chuckles, peeling his own shirt off. 

I threw my bra and top to the side and wanted to take my shorts off but I was interrupted by Brown pressing himself into me again. His hands found my bare chest and he groped the skin of my breasts, groaning against my cheek. 

“Fuck you look so beautiful.” he mumbled against my skin and I smiled, exhaling an airy laugh. 

“I didn’t even get a chance to look at you.” I complain, trying to make out what he looks like by running my hands over his now bare torso. He chuckles against me before pulling away. 

My breath hitches when I see how sculpted he looks. I’ve seen him shirtless before but he was never this close. 

I reach my arm out again and trace it over his pecs before outlining his abs. 

“Fuck.” I curse under my breath and his smile turns into a grin. “I’m so turned on it’s becoming painful.” I whisper and Brown’s eyes widen at my once again bold words. 

He swears to himself, the excitement your words caused shooting straight to his crotch. 

“Take it all off.” he orders, hastily undoing his belt and unbuttoning his pants. I nod, opening my shorts and pushing them down my legs along with my underwear. 

We both discard all our remaining clothing on the ground. The only thing still on our bodies are our dog tags. 

Almost instantly I’m pulled flush against Brown’s and his hands are all over me. I sigh, loving the feeling of his hot chest pressing up against mine. 

After a minute of further worshipping and exploring, Brown pulls away. His hand flattens above my chest and he slowly guides me back. I hesitate a little, unsure of what he has planned. 

“Don’t worry baby, you’re safe with me. I’d never hurt you.” he comforts me and I let him push me back so that I’m laying on the hospital bed now. 

“Let me take care of you.” he softly said, his hands outlining my waist and hips. I nod, relaxing a little. 

Brown lets his hands glide past my abdomen and gently opens my legs. I let him, holding on to the hand that’s holding me down. He moves it and intertwined our fingers before focusing back on me. 

His eyes meet my now wet and glistening pussy and he groans, deeply inhaling my scent. 

“So fuckin’ pretty.” he mutters before letting his free hand trail down the inside of my thigh. I gasp when his fingers finally come in contact with my heat and he gently rubs me through my folds, watching my reactions. My legs relax and fall open a little more and I tighten my grip on his hand. 

He circles my clit, noticing how my muscles tense and he knows he’s doing good. After a while, his fingers start to prod at my entrance before he slowly pushes one of his entirely inside. He gently thrusts it in and out a few times, admiring the feeling of your silky walls. It makes him look forward to having that around his dick. 

Soon a second finger is added and he pushes them knuckle-deep inside me. I whimper, biting down on my lip while my ears are strained back. It felt so good. Better than anything I could ever do to myself. 

“Does it feel good, mama?” he coos, asking rhetorically with a grin. I whine, nodding my head a few times before letting it fall back. 

“So good.” I whisper and my words make his stomach twist with excitement. 

“Fuck- I can’t wait any longer.” he curses, removing his fingers from inside me and licking my wetness off. He groans at the taste and almost shivers in anticipation of how you will feel around him. 

Brown gets on the bed, climbs on top of me and cages me in with his arms on either side of my head. I stare up at him with wide eyes, not quite believing this is happening to me. 

He smirks before gently moving my injured leg to the side so that he doesn’t touch it and hurt you more.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good baby, you’ll forget about everything else.” he whispers in my ear and I shiver. 

My pupils are just as blown wide with lust as his are. He pushes my other leg up and to the side, setting it down on his lower back before he presses his bare hips against mine. My mouth drops open as I feel his throbbing cock press against my burning core. He closes his eyes for a few seconds, to ground himself in reality and not completely lose it.  

“Please fuck me already.” I whine, hating how I’m clenching around nothing. I needed him so bad I was close to just doing it myself.

Brown chuckles. My neediness had him going feral. 

He pulled back a little, lining himself up with me before pushing himself inside. He pushed just a little past halfway and bit his lip. I inhale sharply, loving how I was finally being filled. 

Without further waiting, Brown pulled out, keeping only the tip inside me before snapping his hips forward again. This time he bottomed out and I couldn’t help but moan. 

After hearing that, he made it his mission to draw all and any noises like that from me. 

I dug my nails into his hand that I was holding and let him set the pace. 

He started off slow but I could tell he was restraining himself for me. 

“Don’t hold back, please.” I say and it sounds like a beg but I couldn’t care less. 

He nods, steadying his heavy breathing before starting to properly fuck me. 

Both of us were so frustrated over the past few weeks we needed to release all the tension in us. And what better way to do that than to fuck our problems away. 

With every thrust, I felt genuine waves of pleasure shoot through my body and I was slowly losing myself in it. Everything became so much more sensitive that it felt amazing. 

“You feel so good.” he hissed, baring his fangs while his breath fanned on my shoulder. He bit down, not too harshly but it wasn’t gentle either. I cried out, digging my nails into his back. 

“Need to mark you-” he breathed out “as mine.” 

“Don’t stop.” I plead, feeling my orgasm finally near me. My eyes were fluttering closed and shot open again every time he attacked a new piece of skin.

Suddenly Brown stopped and I almost hissed at him, quickly pulling back and lifting my un-injured leg over his shoulder before leaning down and fucking into me again. 

The new angle had him hitting a spot I’d never known about and it made my thighs clamp around him. 

I moan, holding onto his shoulders for dear life. 

“I’m so close.” I squeak, my voice is barely audible. That’s the biggest motivational speech he could get and he doesn’t let his movements falter for even a second. 

“Come on baby, you can do it.” he coos, leaning further down while trapping my leg in between our bodies. 

Within the next few thrusts, I’m seeing stars. My fingers and toes curl while my entire body tenses. My pussy clenches around Brown and he’s about to spill his load into me. He wants to ask whether he should pull out but the way you're holding him against your body stops him from speaking up. 

I tremble, arching my back into him and moaning his name while my eyes roll to the back of my head. The sight of that and the feeling of me is too much for Brown and can’t stop himself from emptying his balls deep into me. With one last thrust, he pushes himself balls-deep inside me and releases his hot cum. 

My orgasm was slowly dying down but feeling him fill me up like that extended it even more. He had so much of it and I felt it start to drip out of me while he was still buried inside me. 

He moved his torso up, keeping his hips in place and let me remove my leg from his shoulder. When I did he leaned back down and quite literally collapsed onto me. I wrapped my free leg and arms around him while his head rested on my chest. 

We were both panting like mad and my pussy throbbed against him. Never in my life would I have thought this situation could take such a good turn. 

I smile when I see how his tail is happily swaying. Maybe being blue wasn’t that bad after all. 

After a few minutes of holding each other, Brown gets up, gently moving past me. He gets another damp cloth, pushing any cum that leaked out back inside before he cleaned me off between my legs and did the same to himself. 

“You better not get chased by a Thanator again because this is not the last time we’re doing this.” he says with a chuckle and I smile. 

“Maybe I should. Then you can help me out again.” I reply teasing him back. He scoffs before handing me my clothes. 

We get dressed and Brown starts packing up the med kit again. It’s nearing dinner time so he helps me to the canteen and we sit down. 

The others join us soon and Ja sits next to me while Brown is on my other side. 

Ja takes one inhale of the air, expecting to just smell me but instead it reeks of Brown. 

He inhales again before his eyebrows furrow. 

“Why do you smell like Brown?” he asks me. Luckily the others didn’t hear. But Brown did. I look up at him with innocent eyes. Brown leans back, looking over my back at his friend. 

“Might wanna move over.” he says, eyeing how close Ja is to you. Ja’s eyes widen as he can only imagine what happened between you but he listens, scooting away a little. 

Brown discreetly wraps his hand around your waist and pulls you closer to him. No one noticed except for Ja and Prager. 

It made Brown feel pride in his chest because he claimed you and they could do nothing about it. Perhaps they would even notice the developing hickey on your neck soon.

Tag List: @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed

[thirsty4villains]

Cool Heat

Summary: You're an assistant for the Avengers. Loki has been hiding up in his room for the past week. You go to check on him and he's reverted back to his Jotun form, but he's not quite himself. The two of you discover that Jotuns go into cycles of heat, and Loki hasn't been in his Jotun form for over a millennia...

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Mentions of dubcon

Tags: Loki lives in Stark Tower with the Avengers, PIV, smut, humor, romance, Jotun!Loki, dom!Loki, spanking, more tags to be added

Find me on AO3, Wattpad. Previous chapters/other Loki fics on Tumblr by me here.

Notes: THANK YOU GUYS FOR BEING SO PATIENT, I'm sorry this chapter took so long to roll out. Real life stuff, I hope y'all understand. Please enjoy!

Tagged users: @nyxxharmonia @mischief2sarawr @drunkbirdbug @lorelibrarianlizbit @strawberry--fawn @thenotoriouserg @hereforsmutbcicantgetenough @salvinaa @bellajg21 lorielulu7 

CHAPTER 4

You woke up feeling more rested than you did most mornings. If you knew Loki was this good at sex you may have hit him up earlier. Asshole or no, he knew what he was doing. Last night’s events replayed in your head repeatedly: your dream that wasn’t a dream, your conversation, and ultimately the conclusion. They spun around in your head as you tried to assess because it was hard to believe that you had sex with Loki. You also wondered, was it wrong that you weren’t angry at him for having sex while you were unconscious? It definitely wasn’t right of him, but you’d been feeling so lonely and horny – horny for him – that you didn’t care. You quite enjoyed it, actually.

After mulling these thoughts, you took a shower, got dressed, and threw the sheets in the washer. It was nearing 11:00 am on a Tuesday. Shit, you were supposed to submit some reports to Coulson by nine!

You ran to the elevator and went back up to the penthouse. Gathering your paperwork and opening your laptop, you opened up the S.H.I.E.L.D. database and began uploading the work you should have submitted two hours ago. Thankfully, there were no text messages, emails in your inbox, or missed calls on your phone, so Coulson must be preoccupied this morning. Hopefully he wouldn’t notice the time stamp that read 11:28am.

In this moment you were eternally grateful the majority of your work was remote because if you came into S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters three hours late because you slept in, Fury would have your head.

With that problem finished, you went to check on Loki. Back down in the bedroom areas, you stood in the hallway and knocked on his bedroom door. A sense of deja vu swept over you.

“Come in,” the god’s voice said behind the door.

The knob turned and you entered Loki’s room. He sat on his bed, staring at the wall opposite him. He seemed not all there.

“Loki?” you asked. “How are you feeling?”

“Not worse, but not better, either.”

“So you’re still..?”

“Still enormously frustrated sexually? Yes.”

A wave of insecurity washed over you. “It wasn’t… bad, was it?”

He shook his head. “Quite the contrary, it was exactly what I needed. I felt better, instantly. But it came back as soon as I awoke this morning. The fundamental issue I am facing, however, is this dreaded blue color – and these horns. I cannot will this form away with magic no matter how hard I try.”

You apologized for his state.

“Are you not disgusted by me?” the god asked. “After last night?”

“I already told you that it’s okay, you weren’t yourself,” you said.

“I also meant… after.”

“Like, the actual sex?”

He nodded.

“Are you not disgusted by this brutish, carnal form? How rough I was with you. These horns… these claws…” He sneered after looking at his own nails.

“No.” You blushed. “It was really hot, actually.”

For the first time in days, he laughed an actual, genuine laugh. “Sincerely? You human women are so strange. No Asgardian woman in their right mind would bed a Jotun.”

“Their loss,” you said.

He furrowed his eyebrow at you but also, perhaps there was a hint of a smile?

“No matter, my predicament is… URGH!”

Out of nowhere, Loki curled his right hand into a fist and punched the wall. Little pieces of drywall flew outward. Loki retracted his hand and a fist-sized hole was left behind in its wake. He dusted off a thin layer of powder from his knuckles.

You jumped back. “What was that?!”

Loki’s shoulders heaved. “I don’t know! That’s the problem! I don’t know. I have no clue why this is happening now, and why it’s so drastic. I get these changes in mood, like I’m nothing but an adolescent again who cannot even master his own emotions. I feel virile yet emasculated. We had intercourse, so why was it not enough?”

He punched the wall a second time. With gritted teeth and labored breaths he stared at it and you were unsure if the god was lost in thought or would lose his temper entirely. You watched his pecs and the dark blue ridges upon his body move up and down with his breaths. His lean arms, the biceps on them; those horns, those eyes…

Okay, snap back to reality. Loki’s having a crisis. Sex is the only thing that made him feel himself again, even if it was just for a few hours. Like he said, he was in heat; maybe just one go isn’t enough to get the job done.

“Well, we know what we have to do, then.” You outstretched your arms, offering yourself.

He turned from the wall. “What are you –”

“What position do you want me in, Loki?” You interrupted, asserting yourself. You fought the blush creeping up your cheeks. “On my back? On my side? Do you want me to blow you first? Pick one. You want to fix this, right?”

Loki stood there in shock; examining your face, your body language. Or was he checking you out? He dropped his fist that was prepping to punch the wall and his lips stretched into a devious grin.

“On the bed, all fours.”

“Now we’re getting somewhere,” you replied.

Stripping yourself of your clothes, you approached his bed, staying in the crawling position upon his mattress.

To your side he stripped as well, and he was already rock hard. That blueish purple cock sprang from his pants, rearing to go. He climbed onto the bed behind you, examining your backside. You jolted forward as his cold hands touched your thighs. You’d forgotten how cold he felt. His icy fingers traced the smooth skin of your legs.

Then out of nowhere, he spanked you. A cold, red handprint decorated your bottom.

You gave a small screech, jolting forward again – both from the low temperature and the sudden smack.

“You like that?” he asked.

“Mm-hmm,” you muttered, nodding.

Another smack, and this next screech was mixed with a moan.

“Your assertiveness was quite endearing, but remember your tone when speaking to your king.”

He spanked your ass again.

“My – my king?” you asked.

“Yes, your king. Did I not mention to you the other day that I was kept as a bargain by Odin? I wasn’t any Jotun child, I was Laufey’s son, the king of the Jotuns.”

Another spanking. You felt yourself grow wet amidst the pain.

“N – no, you didn’t mention that part.”

“Though I failed to conquer Earth, and Thor is the first heir to Asgard, since Laufey is dead I am still a king in my own right – of Jotunheim.”

“Oh. I’m sorry, my king.”

He gave you one last spanking, a lighter smack, a playful one. “I forgive you,” he said, lowering himself over your back, so his lips could graze your ear. He placed his hands on your butt, to soothe the irritated skin. The iciness felt good but you also squirmed due to your skin being so sensitive there.

With his new position, his cock rested against your cunt. You prevented yourself from lurching forward. He rubbed the cold member against your lips.

“Now your king shall claim what is his.”

Without further warning, Loki penetrated your opening, sinking completely within you. His chilly member made you clench around him. You gasped as you acclimated to him. Oh god, he was big. You didn’t know how you could forget since the last time you fucked him was literally hours ago, yet you were still in awe. His cool, dextrous fingers brushed your hips, finding the perfect place to grip in order to rail you. Then, he moved within you, and you already felt your juices coating him and your own thighs. Completely at his mercy, you allowed him to take all of you, as you kneeled on the bed, all fours, like an animal. He slipped in and out of your cunt at a deliciously fast pace, hitting the right spot every time. Your arms barely kept upright as you tried to keep up the weight of yourself and your balance as the god of mischief rocked your body.

While fucking you, Loki removed one hand from your hip to grasp your hair and tugged. Your head tilted backward so that you were forced to look straight forward instead of below. On one hand you could count how many times you were in Loki’s room, and you didn’t realize until now that he had a mirror mounted above the bed frame, so when he pulled your hair you were forced to look at the scene. You, your tits hanging, on hands and knees, and the blue god of mischief with one hand fisted in your hair and his cock taking you for all you’re worth. His mouth flashed a devious smile as your eyes connected through the mirror, and his red eyes gleamed of hunger and dominance. He tightened his fist in your hair and spoke.

“Enjoying the view?”

In your pleasure you found it difficult to form words.

He spanked your ass. The combination of that, your hair, the view ahead, and your cunt sent sparks through your body. A high-pitched moan escaped your lips.

“I asked you a question.”

Your legs quaked like jello, but you managed to say: “Yes!”

The light in the god’s eyes danced. Another smile graced his face, “Good.” 

He released your hair. Your head fell forward again, your arms collapsed underneath you, and now your face was buried in the mattress. With nothing but your ass in the air, Loki continued to drive into your pussy, chuckling at the state of you; tired, splayed out, and completely surrendered to him. He gave another playful spanking on your behind.

You gathered the blankets underneath, balling them in your fists as Loki delivered your pleasure unto you. All you could do was hold on, listen to the sounds of his hips slapping your skin and the wet noises of furious lovemaking, and praise his body into the bed. Your legs, before jello, were now an autumn leaf shaking in the wind and you knew you were so close. Loki dug his claws into your hips, claiming you once again and you were gone. Shouting into the blankets, your cunt tensed before finally releasing, and you climaxed on the god’s cold, pulsing cock; riding the waves and yet somehow keeping your ass in the air.

Your climax, however, was the catalyst for his own and Loki burst within you, sending a final few thrusts into your hole. He filled you again, uttering his own release to the heavens. Then you both collapsed onto the bed.

When he found the strength to roll off you, you excused yourself to his bathroom to clean up. After that, as well as re-brushing your hair and getting dressed, you entered his bedroom again to find him on the bed reading a book. Loki was still naked as the day he was born. One long, lean blue leg was crossed over the other as he lay back. Your eyes traced the ridges of his Jotun form up along his toned body, then up his face and ending at the curve of his horns. His eyelashes fluttered against his ruby-red eyes. How in the world did he see himself ugly in this form?

You spoke up: “It’s getting close to afternoon. I’m gonna make breakfast. Want anything?”

Loki looked up from his book and nodded. “Yes, I’ll be up in a minute. I’ll have whatever you are having.”

“Cool,” you said, returning upstairs to the penthouse.

In the kitchen you pulled out the cookware and ingredients to make scrambled eggs and hash browns. The items sizzled on the pans, filling the kitchen with the aroma of eggs, potatoes, and spices. Your stomach growled in approval and restlessness. Loki joined shortly behind you, now clothed in his usual garb of black and green. His horns stood high and mighty, even regal, atop his head, cutting through the air.

“This is the first time I have been out in this state at midday in nearly a fortnight,” Loki remarked. He looked around the room, almost as if he’d forgotten what it looked like bathed in noon’s light. 

“That’s rough. I’m sorry,” you said. “How do you feel now?”

“Better – much. I had thought I would need intercourse once and this would go away. Now, I am not so sure. I am hoping… soon.”

You nodded. “Yeah, especially since we don’t know when the others will come back from that mission, and if you’re still ‘sick’,” you airquoted. “...by the time they get back, I’m pretty sure they’re going to start getting nosy, maybe even suspicious.”

Loki growled, not enthused by that thought. A slight tingle tickled your southern area. Instantly, you wondered: were you an asshole for being attracted to his irritability? It’s not like you meant to, but the growling was, well…

“Do you need help with the cooking?” Loki said, interrupting your thoughts.

“Yes, thank you.” Good distraction from that moral dilemma. Thank you, Loki. “Actually, could you help clean up? Put some of the things away for me while I watch the stove?”

The god nodded and proceeded to help with his tasks. Cabinets were opened and closed as he put the spices away, he went and washed the silverware you weren’t using anymore, and threw the eggshells and other trash in the garbage. The food would be ready in just a few minutes.

The kitchen grew quiet again when he finished. So quiet, you thought he may have slinked off somewhere – to the bathroom or something. Until you felt a pair of hands on your hips.

“And you are well after our encounters?” he asked, his voice low and husky. His cool breath tickled your ear. 

One of his hands moved lower, cupping your ass slightly. A jolt of electricity flowed through you. He had you pinned between his front and the kitchen counter.

“The eggs,” you said in protest. 

“What about the eggs?” he quipped, squeezing you lightly.

“They’ll burn. Don’t distract me.”

“Then don’t get distracted.”

Loki proceeded to move his other hand to your other ass cheek, kneading both hands on your behind through your shorts. His mouth lowered closer to you, gliding his cold tongue against your neck. The hairs on your arms stood on their ends, goosebumps budding. The god licked slowly, deliberately. You shivered and Loki chuckled lightly against your skin. He bared his teeth -- his fangs -- and grazed the points over your carotid.

You tried to pay attention to the cooking food; flipping over the eggs, watching the potatoes, adjusting the heat as necessary. However, you were facing much difficulty ignoring the rising heat within your body.

Loki switched between teeth and tongue, lapping and nipping at your neck. You gasped when he bit your earlobe, smoothing over the pain with another lick. One of his hands moved to your front, sneaking underneath your shorts and underwear to play with you. His fingers toyed with your slit, wetting them in your slick and using his lubricated digits to circle your clit. You did your best to not lurch into the hot stove with his cold hands pleasuring you. Your hands gripped the handle on the oven as you moaned aloud.

“I told you not to get distracted,” the god teased. You opened your eyes – which you didn’t realize you’d even closed and quickly removed the eggs from the heat. The ends browned a bit, but they were nowhere close to burned; just a bit more cooked than you’d like them to be.

Your hands returned to the oven’s door handle, bracing yourself so your legs wouldn’t give in. Loki teased you mercilessly: one hand on your ass, the other playing with your clit, and his mouth, tongue, and lips attacking your neck and ear. You could already feel the hickey forming.

“Turn your head toward me,” the god urged.

You did, and met his gaze. He stole a kiss, deep and wanton, and cold; deliciously and illicitly cold. As you kissed, you realized this was your first one with him. A bit backwards, given you’d had sex twice before even kissing, but not unwanted. No, not unwanted at all. His kiss made you lightheaded and shivery, especially as he dove his tongue into your mouth. All this while he massaged your clit, soft and engorged and wet.

When the kiss broke, you took the hash browns off the heat too. “It’s hard to not get distracted when I can’t even see what’s in front of me.”

“Well, there’s no more distracting then, given the food’s done.”

“Mm-hmm.”

Without a moment’s hesitation, Loki yanked your shorts and underwear down your legs. They pooled at your ankles. He barely gave you any time to shake them off before parting your legs for him, exposing your opening for him, and he entered you swiftly. You gave a choked sound as you adjusted to him, his thick, chilly, irresistible cock planted within you. His hands moved; one on hip and the other under your shirt to pinch your nipples.

“I thought you were good,” you croaked.

“Oh, I’m more than good now,” Loki uttered as he began to move within you.

“I mean… We just fucked… not even twenty minutes ago, and already… Mmmf.” You bit your lip as he hit that sweet spot within you.

“What can I say? I finished cleaning up, then I began watching you. Your shorts barely covering your ass, accentuating your thighs, how your hair cascades down your shoulders. Something like a switch flipped inside me. I had to have you. You won’t deny me now, surely?”

“N – no.” Your thighs pressed together and your eyes shut closed. With anyone else this would be too much, but with him you didn’t find yourself growing tired, nor sore, nor overstimulated. Something about Loki, his touch, his voice made you want his sex just as much as he required it for his sanity.

So he fucked you there, on the kitchen counter, in front of the stove. The god of mischief thrusted into you, his chest pressed against your back. The chill of his skin radiated from his chest through your shirt, and of course his cold hands on your breasts and cock buried inside you aroused your senses and your attention. He drove his cock upward, and the best you could do was hold on for dear life as he fucked his divine jotun lechery into you. As they did when you were taken from behind, your thighs shook, your pussy clenched, and with a snap Loki spilled his frigid seed into you. His fingernails dug into your hips and teeth sunk into your neck as he completed his final thrusts, filling you with his load.

The two of you took a moment to catch your breaths. His chest rose and fell against your back, his wintry breath panting upon your skin. When he removed himself, a wet plop noise sounded as his cock exited you. His seed within you trickled down your legs, droplets of him dripping onto the tile floor. You moaned impatiently upon his removal, as you were still flushed with arousal. 

“Patience, woman,” the god spoke. “I am not yet done.”

Without warning, he grabbed you and moved you to an empty space on the counter. Placing you with your back against the granite, he lined his still erect cock with your entrance. His hands grabbed your ankles, resting them on the dip of his shoulders and again, he drove into you.

You screamed.

The frost giant god railed you with his cock, with complete and total access to your cunt, filling you to the brim. Within seconds, he hit the sweet spot within you at the perfect, fast, desperate pace, and you came on him. Your walls pulsed and contracted as you rode his cold member through your orgasm, screaming at the ceiling of Stark Tower. All the muscles in your body relaxed and you finally opened your eyes to see the face of a demon grinning lasciviously at you. His raven black hair rested upon his shoulders, a pretty contrast to his sapphire skin, and you watched him as he fucked you to a second completion.

A third time today – or was it fourth, since technically you fucked after midnight last night, and then this morning, and now… Your brain was too addled but yes, four was probably right. For a fourth time today, Loki came inside you, his member pulsating within you, ejaculating and filling you once again.

He bent down and bit your neck before separating. His scarlet eyes roamed over your body, entirely used and spent. He chuckled to himself. You must have been quite a sight at the moment, with your hair every which way and utterly drenched of him.

With a flick of his wrist, a golden hue emanated from his hands and then disappeared – the mess with it. All of his cum – on the counter, inside you, on the floor, vanished as if it had never existed. With a light head you carefully sat up and jumped down from the counter.

“You look like you’re about to faint,” Loki said.

“I’ll be fine, I just need food. It’s not customary for me to fuck multiple times before breakfast. I’m on an empty stomach right now and I just came three times in half an hour.”

You redressed yourself and plated the food. “Great, well, it’s almost cold now. You interested in cold eggs? ‘Cause that’s what we’re getting.”

“Are you saying you regret our tryst?” he teased.

“No. Yes… I don’t know. No, no I don’t regret it, but I don’t want cold breakfast either!”

You plopped your plate on the dining table harder than was necessary and sat in the chair, ready to eat your sad breakfast.

The god flicked his wrist again, and instantly steam emanated from your food. The smell of warm food filled your nostrils again and you devoured your breakfast.

“Would a ‘thank you’ hurt?”

“Fank you,” you said, mouth half-full.

Loki quirked an eyebrow at the utter impropriety. He redressed himself and joined you at the table.

“We are probably going to need to fuck once breakfast is finished. I’m already feeling the urge again.”

“Oh, sweet Jesus,” you muttered. This was the worst best problem you’ve ever encountered.

And he was true to his word. When the dishes were loaded into the dishwasher, Loki had you on the counter again.

[iveneverbeenhere]

“I wish you roses, and roses, and roses, and roses”

Summary: Flowers and attached notes of BTS boys

Genre: Fluff, angst(?), descriptions of hardships and arguments between Tae and Reader but ending is hopeful

CW: Nothing

A/N: Who would have known my fall back into flower language would align with me doing my first prompt challenge thing. I used a bunch of them, so they will be highlighted in the notes.

Giving credit to @writinginstardust for their huge brain🫡‼️‼️ 🫶🫶

Jungkook: sunflowers, yellow tulips, red tulips

“For my sweetest pookie.

I can’t write much on this card because the company gave me a word limit. Poor me. Can you feel my pout through this? I wanted to tell you that I dreamt about you last night. I saw it so clearly. It was late at night and we were stargazing outside. Bam was sprawled out on our laps like the lazy kid he is while you talked to me about your day, childhood, and everything. I don’t remember which story you were on but I remember you smiling at the end. God, I told you how much I love your smile right? I want to see it again soon. Seeing your blinding smile, I rush back into the house to fish for this bouquet. When I gave you the flowers, you rolled your pretty eyes. Still, you gave me the warmest smile I’d ever seen. It felt like deja vu.

- From Jungkook”

Yoongi: tarragon, daisies, morning glory, gardenia

“Hello dear.

I’ve missed you. Last night I woke up in an insomniac haze. For a second I thought that I was home. I saw you standing in the shadows gazing into me. I came to you and you held me while I clung to you. You smelt like vanilla and lavender. You smelt like home. Then reality hit me like a brick. Genuinely. Once my vision cleared I had a thumping migraine between my eyes and a stiff-as-shit neck. You always did tell me not to fall asleep in my studio chair. I spent the next hour lying in the dark on my studio couch like a wounded orphan. I wish I had told you. I should have told you. I would have been less alone. Less in pain. I don’t think I’m cut out for this job, I swear.

I can see you rolling your eyes, but I mean it this time. I’m coming home tomorrow. Finally, I can’t wait. - Yoongi”

V: Saliva (Red, blue, purple), Red carnation, baby’s breath

“Hi, clover.

You miss me?

I miss you. I’ve been thinking about you all day. I feel dreary. I’m working on a small ceramic mushroom…It’s not going well, It’s too lopsided. The sky is covered in a light gray fog. I hear the rain splash against the windows while Yeontan barks. We were supposed to see each other but I’m all alone now. Are you still upset? I was harsh. I felt the fearful pain of you leaving me, so I was determined to hurt you back. To make you feel what I felt so strongly. However, when I went back to lick my wounds, memories of our bliss came back stronger. Every touch. Every kiss. Every midnight walk we had when we both couldn’t sleep. The mornings waking up together. I was a fool. I always am, but more so in these moments.

When I see you again, can I hold your hand? I miss your warmth. And you - Your Alien”

Jin: red roses, pink roses, white roses

“Did you know my mother adores you?

Yeah, you’re all she ever talks about. “Oh, they’re so sweet.”

“Have you no manners? You see them looking so beautiful and you don’t say anything?”

“Yah, Seokjin how’s my favorite child doing?” Then when I tell her I’m fine, she goes “Quit joking, you know who I’m talking about.” How upsetting! I’m her actual son, but compared to you I’m chopped liver! Still, I can’t blame her. I’m the same way. I missed you during enlistment. I also missed the boys. Though not as much when compared to you. I see them 360 days out of the year. They’re staples in my life, but you…you’re my world.

My private heaven. My home. And I’ve been away from my home far too long. I intend to fix that. Get ready!

- From, Kim Seokjin ♥️”

Namjoon: Magnolia, cactus, succulents, aloe

“

“If the devil were to ever see you, he’d kiss your eyes and repent.” - Farouq Jwaydeh

Good morning, my Divine. I hope your day is going well. Mine could be better. It’s not bad, but not great. Just a day. I’m in a rut. I went to the studio and tried to write but my slack brain didn’t want to. Instead, it wants to focus on you. Where is my love? Have they finished the book I gave them? Have they thought about me today? As I think about them every day? How often do they think of me? I could close my eyes and still envision them perfectly. It’s wrapped itself in roses and lilies and recites love poems and scenarios. It’s excruciating shit. So, I’ll give it and myself an outlet. For starters, do you know how beautiful you are? It’s truly distracting. You’ve left me so lovesick that I’m borderline diseased. My waking hours are anguishing. My feet feel heavy and my head spins. My third rib begs for its return to my body so that my heart can be caged away once again. I know this is a lot to take in. I want to talk about it more with you when I’m less of a shell of a man. I won’t resent you if you don’t reciprocate. I’ll be pained, but I’ll come back to you. If do you reciprocate…Either way, say you want me, and I’m yours. - Kim Namjoon”

J-hope: honeysuckle, forget me nots, chrysanthemum (red)

“Hellooooooo. I hope your day has been as lovely as you are, honey. By the way, what kind of jewelry do you like best? I can’t pick. Gold makes you look stunningly regal but Silver shows the depth of your skin and eyes. This bouquet and the jewelry were both supposed to be same-day gifts, but the company never gave me any damn updates! How unfair is that! So now, these gifts have been forced apart. It’s so cruel. 🥲

I know I could call you about this instead, but it’s too different. I’ve been gone too long. I said I needed a refresh. A moment to connect back to what I want in life. Well, I have! The sky is so clear. The sun is shining. The forecast said there would be nice weather. They were absolutely right. My feet feel lighter. So does my heart. The cloud that hung over me has gone and I’ve stepped out of the box that’s kept me trapped. I’m ready to take my first step, but I want you there with me.

Tell me what you want.

Of the jewelry, I mean. I can’t afford to spend the whole day shopping! I love you. - Jung Hoseok”

Jimin: white jasmine, hibiscus, daffodils, white camellia

“Hello Darling ♥️.

I just realized how much I love you.

Well, not just realized, but I still needed to remind you. It sounds corny, but I’m very sincere. Besides, there’s no occasion for when you should declare your love right? Sure, there are preferred moments, but what’s wrong with keeping love fresh and exciting? Shouldn’t you want your lover to voice their love for you every day?

No, but honestly, It’s crazy, really. No one’s ever made me feel like this.

I’ve dreamt about this for as long as can remember, but only now have I found it. The person who I thought of every second of every day. The person who colored my dreams at night. The one I envisioned whenever I sang love songs. The one who I searched high and low for without fail or doubt.

I’ve waited so long for this.

So long…

I just needed to remind you. I’ll spend the rest of our lives reminding you. So don’t worry, I’m here. - Love Mochi”

[mtsyik]

The babysitter and the babysittee♡

Chapter 4: younger kid?

Chapter three!

Tags: 18+ satoru gojo x reader, babysitter!reader, babysittee!gojo, friends to lovers, one-sided pining, age-gap relationship, a whole lot of flirting, smut, mentions of drugs, angst, mentions of death, lovesick!gojo, engineering student!gojo, architecture student!reader

a/n: aaa!! Isn't it awful how I didn't write for like a week because I got my nails done? All the laptop writers will feel me on this I fear. 😵‍💫😵‍💫 I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and an even better new year!! See ya ♡

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Deja vu hits you swiftly as you maneuver through the crowd. Only this time, you are also drunk and horny; matching the majority of the public here. You are not too shocked by the number of people the frat had managed to gather. Your expectations were raised to barely walkable hallways and crammed living room, alcohol smelling couch, and weed stinking walls.

You sip on your red cup filled with rum and Coca-Cola, eyeing some dudes in the back. You recognize them from the school's hockey team, and a small grin appears on your face as you walk past them. The mini dress you had put on served in your favor, your eye catching the heads that turned in your presence. You walk into the kitchen with a confident stride as you await for ... well, something.

You sigh as you lean on the kitchen counter, the cold marble grazing softly your exposed back. You slightly shiver at the touch and mourn your fresh packet of cigarettes that you forgot in your car. You gulp down the last bit of your drink and throw the cup away in the nearest bin, crossing your arms over your chest. The alcohol in your system is making you woozy, being the true lightweight you are. You close your eyes in the feeling, and you mentally picture the most handsome blue eyes you have ever seen-

You shake your head violently. You then glance in the kitchen's entryway for any welcome intruders and find none. Instead Maki comes stumbling in, her hands reaching to grab the doorway to steady herself.

She calls out your name as she leans in close to you, whisper shouting at you.

"I tttthhhink! She likes me!!" The grin on her face makes you chuckle, and with a reassuring rub on her shoulder from you and your specific words being ,go get her Maki, the woman straightens her back and nods her head, heading off and presumably into the embrace of a specific red haired girl you have yet to meet. Although your friend was surprised you had agreed to come, she seemed to be a lot socially calmer than usual with you being here. You wait for somebody to hit on you, too.

As desperate as you are to get the picture of Gojo Satoru out of your mind, you are not going to make the first move on any guy. Call it pride or stubbornness if you will, but you refuse to hit on a guy first. Yuna would roll her eyes at the statement.

As if reading your mind, one of the hockey players from before makes his way to the kitchen, eyeing you down. He is cute, you think. With ragged brown hair and a charming smile, he makes his way towards you and leans on the counter. He hits on you with possibly one of the corniest lines you've heard, but the alcohol in your belly and the wet patch in your panties make you giggle cutely at him. Not bad, you think. Maybe you will end up getting laid tonight after all.

You try not to let your thoughts get to you as you start actually kissing him. His lips are a little chapped, but his skillful tongue more than makes up for it as he lightly traces the inside of your bottom lip. Your own tongue locks with his, and you sigh blissfully at the feeling. You truly missed this.

Your hands find the back of his neck as you bring him impossibly closer to you. His body heat vibrating off of him as your chests touch - and wowww you never knew hockey could make someone so ripped. His hands are on your hips, and he moves to press his erection on your front -

When someone pulls him off of you.

"Whoa there fellas there is a crowd near you!"

You're panting, lipstick bleeding outside of the outline of your lips as you try desperately to wipe it away despite the buzz in your head. You smooth down your dress and attempt to make it seem like you weren't being fondled just seconds ago.

"W- what?" The guy that you were making out with just moments ago was being pulled away from you by a strong hand on his shoulder. He stammers a little bit, clearly taken aback at the sudden interruption. The slightest irritation is evident in your gaze as you take in Geto, leaning smuggly in the guy's personal space.

"Why don't you go take a walk, hm? Cigarettes on me." Geto pulls out a packet of cigarettes and hands it to the guy. He tries to protest but is shut down by Getos' intense gaze and firm squeeze on his shoulder.

You click your tongue in the roof of your mouth as you were left alone in the kitchen with Suguru.

"Em? What the hell?"

He grins. "Well, hello to you too, sweetie. "

Your hands raise past your shoulders, a sign of your evident aggravation. Why, why, for the love of God, can't you get a sliver of peace?

"Mind explaining what the actual fuck-"

"I didn't take you for the kind of girl to make out with randoms at parties." Suguru leans on the counter, his arms crossed as he turns his head to look at you. The fitted white shirt he has on hugs his toned arms and makes him look huge in comparison to you. You sigh heavily, almost dragging your hand over your face but stopping at the last second, remembering that you had put on makeup for the party. You instead grip your scalp to steady yourself and place your elbows on the table in front of you, unintentionally leaning forward in your short dress.

"Since when do you have an opinion on what I do? And with who?"

"With whom."

At that, you drop your hands on the table loudly and turn to look at him. Geto has a wolfy grin plastered on his face, his gaze dropping momentarily to the chair he pulls for you.

"You're drunk. Why don't you sit?"

You, instead, opt to stand up straight faster than you should and decline. The black spots you see in your vision make you stop in your tracks just for a moment before you make your way to the living room where the mass of people were.

"Fuck off. " With a flick of your middle finger, you emerge back in the party. You spot Maki, making out with that girl from engineering (Nobara, you think), and you're pretty sure that Yuna is flirting with the flustered business major she has been eyeing for quite some time. You grab a red cup and fill it with vodka this time, praying that it's not too late to keep your fainting buzz going as you make your way upstairs.

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The moment Satoru enters the party and sees you flirting with some hockey - team, nobody, his heart stops. Shoulders dropped and vision blurry from the pre - game Todo invited him to, he cannot tear off his gaze from your stupidly pretty lip glossed - lips forming a smile from a -probably- atrocious pick up line. The idiotic sunglasses in the shapes of hearts that hung on his hairline fall dramatically on the bridge of his nose; his hair disheveled.

His mind wavers over to today, the way you looked so pretty up close, the way he was going to lean in and kiss you.

The way you jumped up and scurried off before he had the chance to.

After today, Satoru was 100% sure you were attracted to him. May the sky fall, swear to God hope to die, kind of sure. He had practically raced back to the court, shaking Geto off of his own bones, yelling, "You were right!" . The rest of the evening he had spent rammaging through his entire apartment, looking for the 'perfect thing to wear' at tonight's party. Choso and Yuji teasing him throughout the entire process, saying he looked like he had slept with a hanger in his mouth with how wide his smile was. He had ignored them, instead praying to whatever deity he thought of that Yuna would succeed in her efforts to get you to come to tonight's frat.

And you did! His prayers were answered. And you are invredibly attracted to him, so why aren't you doing anything? Why are you flirting with a random guy at a stupid frat instead of being with him? Why aren't you flirting with him? Because of some stupid moral thing you promised yourself when you were 15?

He downs his cup full of - shit, even he didn't know what the fuck he just drank- and made his way over to you. Well, tried to make his way over to you.

"What are you doing, man?"

Satoru glared at his raven haired friend. Why is he stopping him?

"You're gonna what? Stop her from having a good time?"

"I'll-"

"Confess your everlasting love for her?"

"Well-"

"Admit that she's the only one you've ever loved?'

"Well, yes!-"

"NO! Because you don't say that kind of crap to a girl you met for the first time in what- a decade?"

Satoru puffed his cheeks and pouted. His cheeks were an adorable shade of red (thanks to the shots his coach provided him), and his eyes were slightly glossy.

"Well- what am I meant to do?"

"Nothing! Dont worry, man, I've got you. "

With that, Satoru finds himself frowning, even pouting at the teasing wink Suguru throws his way. His last words to the white-haired man consisted of him trying to convince Gojo not to make a move. At least not tonight. Something about finding out your true feelings towards him and whatnot. Satoru couldn't really listen over the music, plus Todo was already tugging on him because he found some girls. The led lights that were slung around the entire house lit up everyone in a mix of blue, red, purple, and green tones. Gojo couldn't help but sigh, not even having to request another drink from Todo, who made sure to keep his friend's cup filled.

As Satoru walked away with Todo, Geto turned his attention towards you. Shamelessly making out against the polished kitchen counter. Shaking his head to himself, he sighed. He couldn't really just let his friend's heart be broken this way now, could he? So, with a heavy heart and a reassuring smile to the girl that hit on him that he will be back, he marches to the kitchen. Grabbing the idiot that was making out with you by the shoulder. You seem clearly startled by this, and Geto feels bad for only a second. After ushering the guy to head out, he takes you in. Tight dark blue dress hugging your curves just right, with black heels. A cropped black cardigan protecting your arms from the freezing cold of the season. Geto sighs. He isn't an idiot. He has seen the gazes that you give Satoru, the way your cheeks heat up at the proximity when he is near, the way your eyes dart when he hits on you suggestively. The way you are so clearly attracted to Gojo, but brush it off with a snide comment on how you could never date a younger guy, much less the cute little boy you used to babysit.

He also isn't oblivious to the idiocy that curses his best friend, eating up every excuse in the book that you provide him. Because he isn't used to reading signs. Satoru Gojo never had to read signs. If a girl liked him, she would show it (with many ways indeed), not giving the poor white-haired freak any doubts about how desired he was.

Geto groans at your retreaval, no doubt looking for some kind of entertainment that didn't include him correcting your speech. He drinks some kind of alcohol that he found on the edge of the table, not caring about whom it belonged to.

Satoru Gojo had to find out about your feelings tonight.

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Finding solace in one of the upstairs rooms seems useless; every single one of them being used for hook up spots (you still haven't confronted Yuna about your closets...). Until you find a door at the end of the hallway, unlocked, and with no potential herpes inside.

You forget to lock the door behind you, the easiness of the quiet engulfing you whole. What were you thinking? You were never good at this hookup stuff to begin with. Christ, you lost your virginity five years ago, and yet you've slept with - what? Three guys over the course of five years? What possibly made you think you could just waltz in one of the most sex demanding frat parties of campus and get laid? Well, that doesn't sound right. If you can't have sex here, then where?

Your thoughts occupied so much of your mind, together with the definitely not light buzz in your head, that you didn't notice the door unlocking.

With your ass on the soft bed and your neck craned upwards to massage the back of it, you barely miss the crack of lights emitting from the open door. There, the one person you didn't want to see standing in all his glory, eyeing you down. Then, to your demise, he closes the door and marches your way.

"W-wh-what are you... doing?" Your words fumbling out of you in a stutter you didn't even know you were capable of, you attempt to get up. Forgetting you had heels on, you stumble, strong hands catching you in a haze.

"You really are drunk." He smirks, his tone full of amusement as he drinks you in. Only slightly tipsy, Satoru is having the time of his life. Upon hearing that you would probably be heading upstairs by Geto, he marched his pretty ass on these stairs to get to you. And if there was one thing he understood that Suguru meant, is that tonight he would be getting answers.

His big, beefy arms are around your waist now, your own arms pressing on his shoulders to keep yourself steady. His legs are positioned between your own, and your mind is spiraling at the feeling of his heat emitting from his body to yours. Your pussy clenches around nothing, your panties gaining a wet patch from Satoru's breath on your face.

"This dress for me, pretty?"

"Sa- Toru.... " Your eyes catch his. Satoru thinks he can just faint at the sight of your glossy eyes peering up at him, mascara elongated lashes fluttering cutesy, lips forming a pout. At least now, he is reassured that his dick can, in fact, work properly, considering he was having doubts about how emotionless he was with the blonde chick hitting on him downstairs. You sigh, carefully plucked eyebrows scrunching in a way that makes Satoru's dick throb. Your hands wrap around his neck, your forehead leaning on his. Gojo is sure you can feel his heartbeat (and penis) underneath his clothing.

"Toru....why- Why are you doing this?" You almost whisper, catching him off guard.

"You're - you're driving me..... crazy...." Your hand reaching down his chest to trace invisible circles on his velvety shirt. You really don't have the slightest idea what you're doing to him. Your fresh set of manicured nails scratching his overgrown undercut sends him spiraling. His breath is uneven, his lips parted, and his pupils dilated as he gulps.

"I drive you c-crazy pretty girl?"

You hum in response, your brain too foggy to come up with an actual response.

"Soo' young too...what- *hic* ar'they feeding you these' days..."

Satoru's breath hitches as your arm drops lower and curls around his bicep. You whistle lowly at the absolute density of it, your hand far too small to actually curl around it whole. Gojo had already established how tiny you looked compared to him; his daydreaming about you worsening as the days pass by. Thoughts about bending you over that ridiculous crammed desk you keep at the university's workshop filling his head anytime you would appear with a skirt in front of him; bending over just slightly so you can explain the changes in your designs. Inappropriate thoughts entering his mind when he sees you taking drags off of your cigarettes, your lipstick staining the base of the filter of it; making him wonder what else that pretty lipstick of yours can stain.

"It matters that much that I'm younger than you?"

"*hic* Well, s' not just that..."

"Well what is it then? That you used to watch over me?"

"You..."

"What?"

Satoru can't help himself as he leans down to peck your cheek. Your reaction is priceless as he holds you close; left arm strong around your waist and right caressing your face. He holds your chin with the crevice between his thumb and index finger, his long fingers curling around your cheek.

You huff out as your face warms up, your eyes fluttering. For the first time, Satoru notices.

"What is stopping you?"

He murmurs against your skin, causing goosebumps to rise along your entire body. You're about to answer; admit that you have no idea what is actually stopping you. Admit that you are both adults now, and while three years seemed like a major difference back when you were in high school, it basically means nothing now. Gojo has proved how he is more than mature, so what is stopping you from being with an incredibly attractive man who was also attracted to you? And you really are about to respond to him-

But no worries! The alcohol in your system decided for you, making you black out before you even got a word in. The last thing you hear is curse words, no doubt coming from Satoru.

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The next morning, you wake up with a pounding headache. Groaning into your hand at the natural light emitting from the windows, you pull the lavender smelling covers over your head. Your eyebrows scrunching at the pain, you smack your hand on your bedside table in an attempt to find your morning glasses. Instead of your glasses, though, you find a glass of water with some kind of pills right next to it; aspirin you assume. You make a mental note to thank Yuna for-

Wait.

Yuna has no idea where you keep the medicine. You recall all the times the poor helpless woman was in pain but couldn't find the ibuprofen tabs you kept right on the shelf. But Maki does.

You let your head fall back completely and almost laugh at your stupidity. Maki probably put those out for you. Maki, who the last time you saw her was.... making out. Huh? If she did end up getting laid, wouldn't she go back to her apartment?

You sit up suddenly, with a pop! From your joints as you slowly take off the lavender smelling (aka: not from your washing machine) blanket off of you. You gasp as you glance around the foreign room. Big window on your right that lets the sun in, colors all coming from the same blue pallet keeping the space around you minimal. Posters hand on the walls, most of them from parties that you don't recognize happening around here, and oh!

A bunch of engineering stuff on a marble desk on the corner. Calculators, wrenches, bolts, sketchbooks, and rulers decorate the pretty marble. You keep looking around, trying to find some clue as to who this room belongs to.

Whom.

Your head is ringing at the silent correction, your hand going to clutch at your temple as you try to remember anything from last night. Instead of remembering, though, you are suddenly incredibly aware of the soft cotton that embraces your torso. With a soft gasp, you lift and then drop the blanket off of you and then on you. Apparently, whatever you were doing last night led to your dress being discarded off your body and replaced with a soft (probably pure cotton, my God who can even afford pure cotton these days) white shirt and a cute pair of red pyjama pants. The socks that you were apparently being given were on the floor, and you nod your head at the fact that even piss drunk, you can't sleep with socks on. You groan and rub your hand over your face, getting up finally.

You try to ignore how your makeup from yesterday was wiped off, apparently. What kind of gentleman did you find at a frat party?

You crack open the wooden door, carefully peaking at the outside of the comfy room you were just in. Not having heard anything (or anyone) suspicious moving around, you step outside unto the living room. It's cutesy, you think; the inside of the room you wer3 just in and the outside of it completely contrast. It's painted a variety of nude colors, beige being a consistent base for the living room/ kitchen. The apartment is very comfortable in general; splashes of warm brown here and there and soft red tidying everything up. You walk closer to what appears to be a photograph on the wall, your eyes widening upon seeing a pair of dashing blue eyes smiling in the photo.

Oh no, you did not!!

Panic shoots through you as you look through more photographs. Maybe this guy you apparently spent the night with was a... uh...fan? Of uh... the uh... basketball team! That had to be it! The next photo contains the entire basketball team, obviously a bit younger than now but still as handsome as ever. Maybe you were in the apartment of a uh... guy from the school's newspaper! Maybe somebody from the photographer club, who just wanted a good picture that he obviously would hang up in his... living room? Your thoughts overtaking you cause you to be oblivious to the coffee table behind you, and you trip and fall with a thud!

With your ass on the ground and your hands on your head to somehow make your brain stop hurting, your own groan concealed the sound of the door opening. Still, the vibrations on the floor by the tall and muscular man before you cause your eyes to snap towards him. Satoru comes in with an amused grin on his face, and what you could only assume is breakfast in the plastic bags in his hands. He makes his way towards you, placing the food delicately on the coffee table and discarding his shoes by the entryway (did he throw your dress in the same manner when he was undressing you?) he bends down to you.

"You really are clumsy, huh?"

His fingers gently tug your hand away from your face and interlock his hand with yours. He lifts you off the ground, eyes bright and grin sitting prettily on his face as he takes in your disheveled appearance.

"I brought you some breakfast. I-I didn't know what you liked so-"

"This was a mistake."

You avert your eyes from his as you take in his hurt expression, pulling your hand from his. You can not believe that would be this reckless and actually sleep with Satoru Gojo. I mean my God, what were you thinking? What about morals? What about ethics? What would your fifth grade teacher say if he found out you abandoned your previously set-in-stone morals for a one night stand that couldn't even lead anywhere?

"Um. Wow. I definitely didn't expect that."

Satoru scratches the back of his neck, an awkward chuckle escaping his throat.

"Although, I am not sure what you're referring to-"

"Listen. Satoru. I-"

You huff and puff, trying to make sense of what's happening. Your hands are now on your hips, on your face, in your hair. Anywhere really where you could be given some stability as you pace around.

"Whatever happened last night - it - it can not happen again."

His head tilts to the side as he eye's you in curiosity.

"What? You vomiting on me?"

"WHAT?! OH my God!! You've got to be - No! I don't even!!"

At this point, Satoru is trying to get a hold of you, but you get out of his grasp at the last second. You now seem to be playing a game of tag, with you behind the couch and Satoru leaning in to stop you from panicking.

"Look, it was fine! I mean, we made it back in the house with you only vomiting once! Well, my house, but hey, aren't you glad you get to spend your morning with me?"

You leap towards the center of the living room, with Satoru rounding the couch.

"We- I- we, what we did! Oh- it- it- can't happen again! You hear me!"

"What? What did we even do?"

You pause, Satoru across from you on the other end of the coffee table.

"W-w-well, well we uh, well we, had s-s-sex? Didn't we?"

Satorus eyes go wide, his grin widening as your cheeks turned red.

"And if we did?"

You shriek at the almost 2 meter tall man walking across the table and unto you, but not for the very last second in which you managed to get away and into the kitchen. You grab the first pan you find and point at him with it. Your breath ragged and uneven while Satoru just leaned with his arms crossed on the cabinet. Smirking down at you.

"The idea of you and I potentially having sex makes you this flustered? I mean, I know how hot you think I am -"

"What?!"

"But this? *whistle* whole new level."

You don't back down from his gaze. Instead, you bring the pan up to your eye level, threatingly.

"I'm not flustered. I am - disgusted. My the mere thought."

Satoru grabs the pan from you, and you dart towards the couch once more. His eyes are wide.

"You- disgusted?"

"Uh-huh. And... icky."

"Icky?!"

"And-oh!"

You don't even manage to finish your sentence because the absolute mountain of a man in front of you managed to tackle you unto the couch. You squirm and try to get away, but he pins your wrists above your head. Inappropriate thoughts start swimming your mind, and you need to remind yourself to behave.

"Disgusting, huh?" He whispers in your ear, and the sudden proximity makes you gulp. Satoru could barely keep it together with the sight of you, in his clothes, all comfy and disheveled, coming out from his bed. Wide eyes and red cheeks adoring your features. It was enough to drive a man mad.

He looks angelic as always, you think. Wearing not nearly enough proper attire for the cold of the season, wearing a tight shirt, and some sweats. He had a bandana on his head that pushed his gorgeous locks out of his face. It made you nervous. He made you nervous. Maybe it's about time you acknowledge the small crush-

Nope! Not happening! Instead you decide kneeing him in the nuts was the best way to go.

Satoru groans, his grip on you lightening. You get up hurriedly and watch his movements as he doubles over.

"You! Listen to me, mister!"

Satoru glances at the accusatory finger that is being thrown his way. Your hands exaggerate every word coming out of your mouth in a panicked attempt to make yourself clear.

"I, babysat you! Alright! So, you could grow up to three meters tall for all I care, gain all the muscle in the world, and gain all the knowledge available!"

You huff. Your breath is uneven as you try to sound intimidating.

"Are- Are those, compliments?"

"And I'd still see you as a younger kid!"

Well, that seems to have done some damage. By the way Satoru's expression turns from confused to agitated, you assume.

"I'm not-"

"To me, you are!"

Ready to fight you in that logic, the door opening and revealing Geto stops him. Having picked up dry cleaning (that looks like your dress from last night) He barely is able to walk through the door with that stupid grin on his face.

"Whoa, there, lovebirds. The entire building can hear you - whoa!"

You decide running for the door, grabbing the dry cleaning from Geto's hands and yelling something about paying him back later, is the best call to save your ass.

Gojo groans loudly, standing up and sighing loudly at the mess the entire apartment is in from your little game of tag, and contemplates chasing after you; but decides against it. He raises a hand as to shush Geto, who is about to ask what happened.

"I need to figure out a plan".

You need to see proof that Satoru is grown? Fine. There are other ways.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

a/n: phewww this took a while. I wanted to upload a longer chapter considering midterms are starting in a month, and I haven't even begun studying 😭😭. I hope this didn't seem rushed and that this was an enjoyable read!! Thanks to everyone who seems to like the story!! Happy New Year to everyone ♡

Taglist:

@trishiepo0

[sturniolotrip-samandcolby-lover]

Chris sturniolo -focus

Pairing -domChris x British reader fem

Summary -When you decide to show your boyfriend you favourite British show , he gets bored and decides to test how good you can focus .

Warnings - smut , swearing , fingering, unprotected sex, p x v intercourse , slightly Dom Chris ,Dirty talking ,bulge kink , cream pie , praising,multiple orgasms.mentions of spanking , mentions of rough sex , mentions of masturbation. Thats all I think let me know guys if I've missed anything.

Author note -use of y/n , first person and not proofread .

Word count -2k

"Chrisss it's starting" I shout to my boyfriend of 1 year , dragging out his name while he leaves his bathroom and makes his way over to the bed."I don't get why you love this show so much ain't it just about people baking" he replies to me as he lifts the thick blue quilt up so he can get into bed , allowing the cold air to hit my side I'm instantly overwhelmed by warmth as Chris lays beside me ."oh no it's so much more then just people baking , it's a competition , it's entertaining and most importantly it's funny when things go wrong" I say with overenthusiastic excitement describing my favourite show ' the great British bake off' ."sounds like it's even more sterotypically British then you are , what are they going to do in the breaks eat fish and chips with the queen" he says with a awful fake British accent laughing "babe the queen is dead" I say shocked by his choice of words "oh shit yeah" he says linking an arm around my waist as i roll onto my side facing the laptop , I feel Chris make himself comfortable behind me spooning me from behind with my back against his chest .I press play on the screen.

The theme song starts to play and I do my basic girl thing ofo doing a happy little dance eating a deep chuckle from Chris ."you and this show I'm starting to think you love it more then you love me" he whispers in my ear giving me a quick kiss onto my neck."hmmm possibly" I say with a smirk on my face winding him up .*wack* "oh really" Chris says smug as he smacks my ass i can almost hear the smirk in his voice.Resulting in a squeal and laugh from me .We watch the first quarter of the show in a comfortable silence as the adverts start I hear a sigh from Chris as his deep breath hits the back of my neck causing me have instant goosebumps.

He shuffles behind me so that his head is higher up then mine , bits of his hair tickling my cheek "you know what" he says with his voice in a deep whisper I can't help but feel butterflies in my stomach ."you look so beautiful right now" he says kissing my forehead .I feel my face get hot as I blush at his compliment " good job it's dark in here or you'd see me looking more red then a embarrassed lobster but thank you , you look beautiful too" I move my head so that I can reach his lips and I meet them with a light kiss , that both Chris and I smile into .We hear the show begin again so we both draw our attention back to it .

*5 minutes later*

We're still silent as we continue to watch the show when I feel Chris hand move under the waistband of the grey joggers of his that Im wearing, I try to focus on his laptop but the feeling of Chris's rough hands against the peachy flesh of my ass is slightly distracting."hmmm you're so warm mama" Chris talks into my ear more to himself then me.He rubs my ass cheek with his hand and I get deja vu from last time his hand rubbed my ass was last week when he caught me touching myself, Chris decided to teach me a lesson by spanking me and rubbing my ass to sooth me ."I must be that hot " I joke to him pretending to flick my hair , earning a laugh from him .I feel his hand start to move over my hip and close to my exposed core , causing me to let a small whimper of anticipation earning yet another laugh from chris."what are you doing y/n?" He whispers into my ear so innocently as if he doesn't know what he's doing .I keep my mouth shut knowing that the next noise that falls out of my mouth would be a moan ."answer me baby girl" chris says in a demanding tone ."trying to focus" i say through a breath to him ."shall we see how good you can focus mama" he says seductively "what do you me-" im cut off when his hand lands on my pussy with a quick smack."keep focusing on the laptop baby girl and you can cum and if you dont well take a wild guess who isn't coming tonight" He says to me finishing his sentence with another wack to my pussy , I nod my head signaling to chris that i understand."good girl" i hear him say as his fingers move up and down my slit getting coated in my juices ."so wet for me already and ive barely touched you" chris says causing a moan to fall out of my mouth .

"Please Chris , please" I say between breathless moans ."awe what is it baby" he says to me in a mocking tone "please just so something" I respond "well since you asked so nicely" he says in the same mocking tone as his fingers find my clit rubbing in quick circles I throw my head back against his shoulder as the instant ecstacy builds with every move of Chris's fingers "remember focus baby else you're not cumming tonight" he reminds me as my legs start to quiver around his hand."fuck..." I moan out closing my eyes thankfully that Chris was still behind me else he would of reminded me again to focus ."you're so good Chris" I squeal out "look at you already on the brink of cumming and I've not even went inside of you yet" I hear Chris say , sounding distant as I feel my release coming fast "please Chris please I need to cum I'm gonna cum" I say throw pants and moans ."go on baby be a good girl and cum" he says into my ear as his fingers move faster then they was previous as I feel my release overwhelm my body as I'm left a shaking , moaning mess while Chris continues rubbing my clit as he helps me ride through my orgasm ."so good mama , you look so pretty when you cum" he says as he pauses his movements "you're so pretty you're going to do it again " he continues all the attempt of focus has gone out the window as one of Chris's arms reach over me slamming the laptop shop his fingers that are still rest on my clit dives straight into my pussy as he pushes one into earning a instant moan " so tight baby even after I've already made you cum once you're tight" he says to himself more then me as he pushes a second finger in , plowing me he starts of deep and slow as his pace speeds up .The sound of my pussy wetness filling the room , Chris's fingers move so fast and so deep I can hear him talk to me but no words make sense I can't even place words myself I just have moans and whispers falling from my mouth as my second orgasm of the night builds up faster then the first one did ."so wet baby I can feel you clenching around me , do you wanna cum girl" he asks me hypothetically "yes god yes please Chris can I cum" the words leave my mouth in a embarrassing whining sound.Chris uses his spare hand to spread my shaking thighs as they try to close around his fingers , "gotta stretch you out ready to take my cock" I hear him says as he places a third finger into my wet pussy .He fingers go deeper and faster curling to touch my gspot as i throw my head back again as swear words, moans and Chris's name repeatedly falls out of my mouth as i cum for the second time tonight .Again he doesn't stop his actions until my body goes limp against his .He pulls his fingers out of me as i hear him sucking my juices off , i move around in his arm so i could face him when im greeted with his lust filled blue eyes staring into my dazed ones as he sucks his fingers clean of my juices .

"You good baby girl" he asks me I nod my head in agreement to him ."good cus you're gonna do it one more time " he says as he rolls me over already taking my jogging bottoms off."Chris I don't know if I can" I say tiredly to him "you can baby just one more time , cum around my cock let me fill you up mama " he whisper to me grabbing my chin so he can move my head so that I look at him ."okay" I say to him "I wanna watch you cum again" he says as he holds me legs up and open and rest the head of his dick at my entrance before he thrusts in stretching me perfectly, we both let out moans , with our mouths open and staring into each others eyes. He starts thrusting into , fucking me mercilessly .I feel his cock go deeper inside of me I move my hand over to my stomach when I feel a bulge it's Chris dick he's so deep inside of me that he's actually made a bulge in me ."feel this" I say to him between moans as I grab Chris's hand and move it over to where he dick is making itself well known in me."fuck im so deep in you" he said still holding my face so our mouths are touching as we speak were that close .

Chris never slack in his movement as he continues to thrust into me at a inhumane speed , I'm left almost screaming against his mouth showing the Chris that I'm near my release."you're shaking baby" Chris states with a smirk as his hand that is still holding my leg up reaches further up and rubs my already over sensitive clit fast and nearly coming " keep your eyes on me baby , I wanna see your pretty face when you cum on my cock" he says and that's all that it takes for me to release myself over him "good girl such a good girl" he says to me as he helps me ride out my final orgasm ."please Chris" I say to him as my body is exhausted after my orgasms Chris shows no mercy and continues to fuck me relentlessly "what baby" he says in the same mocking tone from earlier "cum Chris please fill me up I want to feel your load" those last few dirty words are all that is needed as its chris time to moan into my mouth as i feel his long hot strings of cum coat my walls .He stills and pulls out of me leaving us both a panting mess as he kisses my now sweaty forehead "im so proud baby , you took me so well".are the last words i hear chris say before i fall asleep with my head against his chest .

[tojisun]

our shallow graves — 01

recom miles quaritch x recom fem reader

!! smut (between fuck buddies outside of main pair) - minors dni; heat (as a theme); mean quaritch; power imbalance; references to (made up past), including death and prev dead lovers; worldbuilding; fast slow-burn; the reader adopts a nickname (callsign) which gets used // 3k words

: this chapter lays the foundation of the fic and introduces the initial dynamic of quaritch and the reader; reader’s callsign is 10/10 from that one penguin in madagascar; this fic made me fascinated with deja blu fr; hope u guys would luv it <33

next // m.list

you don’t understand why you were one of the early ones they awakened. sure you signed up for the shitty program – because who wouldn’t want to be an eight-feet tall blue alien? apparently, other than the scientists, you were the only one in your squad who wanted the transfer – but you didn’t expect to be the first in the line up.

to be in colonel miles quaritch’s squad. 

other than walker and mansk, you knew absolutely no one from the deja blu team. but you’ve heard of them, alright. who wouldn’t? they have lines of kills and assists in terra and, now, in pandora; they are warmongers at most, rascals at least. 

you stare up at their imposing figures, trying to make sense of the fact that they’ve all been killed in action. 

despite not remembering much, you’ve come to terms with your own death during the initial war – a lone pilot, only meant to be an escort, gunned down by trudy’s bird before being further propelled into the lush forest floors of pandora by the banshees. it is a boring life story, one that is only worth telling because of your “sacrifice” in alien territory. 

(you still don’t understand why the shrink insisted on showing you the syphoned clips of your death. 

“it’s to help you move on,” she said as if she could ever understand the horror of seeing yourself fall to your death. as if you had not been a human trapped inside a fucking burning bird, being torn to pieces by, what could literally only be, flying dinosaurs. as if you were just another collateral. just another number added to the charts.

“i’m sorry,” she added, a small smile on her face as she turned to you, her hair tied in a neat bun and her white blouse tucked in her pencil skirt. “ultimately, thank you for your service, ma’am.”

fucking piece of shit. 

you wondered if she even has a licence or the RDA just handed your files to some science nerd and was told to play god for their little blue alien. to fix you right up so that they could send you to another suicide mission.)

but that wasn’t the case for the rest of the deja blu. you know they were directly fighting; leaders of smaller squadrons, following the beat of papa dragon. walker and mansk, themselves, have touched down with guns in their amp suits, directly under wainfleet’s command. you don’t know how they died – you couldn’t even fathom wainfleet dying. and yet there he stands with the others, bald as fuck but imposing nevertheless.

your eyes shift to the man beside him. not the tallest, zdinarsik got that title, but the one in command. 

colonel miles quaritch. big, blue, and seething. 

one more thing you noticed in this whole fuckery is that your recombinant body is short. you stood about two inches shorter than walker, and she’s a full head shorter than anyone else. as you line up beside her, with fike on your other side, you three could very well make a groupie of santa’s little helpers.

wainfleet smirks like he’s thinking the same. you would have rolled your eyes at him but the colonel began to move close, his combat boots echoing against metal floors, snuffing out any noise from the squad. 

“and who are you, kid?” he asks, standing directly in front of you.

you tell him your name, internally wincing when your tail unconsciously coils around your leg. you still don’t know how to control it – an easy tell of your anxiousness. the colonel’s lips lift up in a smirk, his eyes flashing at your tail in slight mirth, before recognition crosses his eyes.

“rico?” 

you startle at the use of your unofficial callsign, a feat only made possible after climbing up the ranks and being heralded as one of the best pilots.

(trudy had been the best pilot in hell’s gate; the one with the most medals, and rightfully so. she was the one who ripped through the skies with her samson, zigzagging like she had been riding a banshee instead of a plane. 

the one with the kindest heart.

there is a part of you that is grateful that it had been trudy who took you down.)

“yes sir,” you reply, blinking up at him after he’s dismissed your salute, feeling a little shy at being recognized, somewhat, by the colonel. 

quaritch hums, tilting his head to the side in thought, watching you with narrowed eyes. briefly, you wonder if he’s asking himself why it had not been socorro who was awakened. to be honest, you are asking yourself the same thing because it doesn’t matter if you were one of the best, not when socorro, sweet and gentle and pregnant socorro, had the colonel’s favouritism. 

(socorro’s child was a beautiful boy with sun-kissed hair and chocolate eyes. he was such a darling even though you’ve only seen the infant in passing, held lovingly in his mother’s arms.)

they could’ve made a blue alien baby this time around. maybe, then, they’d be happier too. 

the colonel certainly doesn’t deserve it but socorro does. 

“were you a private, rico?” quaritch asks, pulling you from your thoughts. he leans close again, dramatically bending his head down which highlights the difference in your heights.  

“no sir,” you reply. “i was a lance corporal, sir.”

he hums again, finally backing up and giving you more room to breathe. then, he sends you a smile. “well then, welcome to the team, kid.”

the tension seeps out of you as you nod, thanking him before he turns to the other recoms, chatting amiably. walker bumps you with her shoulder and you see her smile from your peripheral.

you give her a smaller one before willing your tail to finally uncoil from your damn leg and act normal.

of course it just swishes behind you.

-------

training is gruesome. you honestly thought that it would be easier with your stronger and newer body, but with the colonel around, that thought vanished. 

suicide drills were the squad’s least favourite, you especially. not only were the stakes increased to push the limits of your new bodies, but you all were always watched by the scientists, with their little sticks poking at your bodies and their little wires strapped down to whatever skin they wanted to bother this time around. 

wainfleet started screaming at them, calling them “fucking losers,” and barking at them to give the squad some space. quaritch quickly took over, grunting that whether they were losers or not, whatever they were doing was necessary. that said, he sent the scientists a heated glare, making it known that his words do not necessarily reflect his feelings – wainfleet had taken this as his victory. 

the tests weren’t fun, but you appreciated their purposes; through them, you learned that your na’vi DNA was extracted from a tipani warrior. the sentiment isn’t lost in you – they robbed the graves of the na’vi. you think you are used to what humans could do all for conquering pandora but for many days, you were unable to stomach any packet meal they fed your squad. walker had to talk you out of it because your unintentional hunger strike made you lag behind – an error that had you being summoned to the colonel’s office.

“we’re all tryin’ our best here, rico,” quaritch’s voice echoes in his office. 

you’ve never been inside the one he had back in hell’s gate and you had hoped that you would never see the day of being in his current one, but there you stood, tensed as the colonel studied you. 

he refused to sit on his customized chair, choosing instead to pace just behind his desk, his bulging arms hidden from your view as he clasped his hands behind his back. quaritch’s lips are pursed, almost pouty, and you beat yourself up at the thought of finding him – your nose scrunches at this – attractive when he’s busy scolding you. 

“our circumstances ain’t ideal, but we’re back as some lab-grown native and we oughta take advantage of what we’ve become,” he says, continuing his tirade amidst your silence, snapping you out of your humiliating thoughts. “your little stunt costs us a delay on proceeding with a recon of the area and the only reason i’m not benching you is because the general has faith in you – faith that, frankly, i’m still not understanding.”

your back straightens at his words, and you tamp down the need to wince at his scathing tone. he is right, after all. for some fucked up reason, the general – both ardmore who’s stationed in pandora and gonzales who’s still in terra – backed the need to have your soul transfer commence. you still don’t know what it had been for, given that past your flying skills, you are just another idiot who knows her way around a gun. not memorable to many, except, apparently, for those in command.

(‘maybe this was why the colonel doesn’t particularly like me,’ you would think later, safe in your room. ‘socorro may have the colonel’s attention but what is a colonel – one who already failed his priority mission – against two generals?’)

“i’m sorry, sir,” you utter, clear but not loud, and quaritch just watches you again with his unwavering stare.

finally, he grunts, turning his body away from you to fully face the glass window that oversees the lower-level operations. you take this as his dismissal and scurry out of his office.

-------

“and she’s finally back from tryna kill herself!” wainfleet’s voice echoes in the nearly empty mess hall and you roll your eyes at him, glowering when he just proceeds to chuckle.

you plop your tray in front of walker, sending her a small smile which she returns with a cute beam. her braids are out of her hair tie today, letting them frame her face in the way you saw the omatikaya prefer. shooting a quick glance at zdinarsik’s way and it’s clear that someone else prefers it this way too. 

“what’d the pukes say?” fike asks, sloshing around his packet meal, sneering in disgust when it jiggles like a slab of jello. more than the fact that you found out that your gene came from a corpse, this ‘food’ is about to do the trick of making you want to pursue starvation again.

“said i needa take so many pills.” you shrug, tearing open your packet of faux meat with pinched lips and your shoulders tensed like you’re expecting to be shot at. “apparently, i stunted my growth.”

prager laughs. “aww, you gonna remain short?”

“aww, you gonna remain hairy?” you shot back, snorting when prager just pouts as he raises his hand to rub at his fuzzy chin. gross.

wainfleet barks out another laugh at the exchange before reaching across the table to place an apple onto your tray. “‘ere ya go, rico. real food.”

you don’t know where he got the fruit, you don’t even know if it’s ‘real’ like he just said, but you do not have room to complain. fake fruit is a whole lot better than the slush in the compound. 

“thanks,” you say, smiling bashfully, not expecting wainfleet, of all people, to adopt the mother hen role. he winks at you in reply, wiggling his brows, before straightening back up and fooling around with prager. 

you dump the packet back to your tray before picking up the apple. you wipe it on your shirt before bringing it up for a bite, humming in delight at the crunching sound it made.

“delicious?” mansk asks from beside you, his lips quirking up in a smile when you turn to him.

“yummy,” you reply, humming, taking another bite. he snickers, bumping your leg with his, before placing his own apple onto your tray too. 

“you gotta eat more,” is all he says when you make a questioning sound before bending over to hover his lips on the shell of your ear. “news spread fast that you got your ass reprimanded by the colonel yesterday.”

“uh-huh,” you mutter, unable to focus on what he’s saying at the sudden surge of heat engulfing you. 

your lips feel dry all of a sudden, your throat parched from unknown thirst, and you turn to mansk, wanting to ask him what the hell is happening to you – was this the fault of the fucking apple? – only to see his own face flushed, blue skin turning into dark purple. 

his eyes meet yours and all of a sudden, you feel like you are doused with gasoline and set ablaze.

huh. well, if that isn’t interesting.

-------

“jesus- devin, not too ha- ah!” 

your back arches at a particularly hard thrust, your jaw falling open for a drawn out garble. the explosion of pleasure races across your synapses, filling you up with nothing but a deafening white noise. blearily, you recognize mansk’s bigger hands wrapping around your waist, lifting you up from his lap only to drop you down again. a hiccupped moan escapes your lips, your eyes rolling to the back of your skull, feeling your walls spasming around him.

“rico, fuck, so good. so good.” mansk’s voice is faint, falling from his kiss-swollen lips in murmurs. you would have missed it without your new heightened senses, but the sound of his voice tickles your ears, making your tail flick behind you as you preen at his praises.

a giggly “thank you” barely makes it past your teeth when mansk manhandles you again, humping his hips up to grind himself along your pelvis, driving him deeper. you choke on your words, unable to stop the moan that is punched from your lungs, the sound so loud that mansk had to cover your mouth with one of his hands.

“not so loud,” he mumbles, bumping his forehead against yours. the sound of his rugged voice makes you clench around his length, making you feel utterly stuffed. you drag your blunt nails across his back, your eyes fluttering rapidly, feeling yourself tipping into the peak of your orgasm.

mansk laughs. “y’r unbelievable.” 

you do not know what it is that you said, your wobbly voice still smothered by his hand, as you get lost in the way he bounces you on his lap. mansk goes quiet, only letting muffled grunts pierce the air between the two of you, and you feel the sudden surge of primal need unleashing deep in your belly.

the tight clench of your abdomen almost hurts, your orgasm ripping through the remnants of your sanity. your last thought was: ‘motherfucker, why did no one ever tell you that the na’vi have heats?’

it is later when the haze lifts up that the warmth licking up from the core of your muscles – almost like it is burrowed deep within your blood vessels – is finally snuffed out. 

mansk is asleep on his bed, dead to the world. you shuffle out of his loose embrace, blinking blearily before realizing that he had cleaned you two up. a small smile graces your lips as you fully slink out of his bed, looping your tail around your leg as you pick up the pieces of your off-duty apparel. 

pressing a kiss on his forehead, and rolling your eyes when he sleepily bats you away like you are a fly, you grab your respirator and quietly leave his room. 

standing in the empty hallways, turning your head from side to side, you study the stillness of the metal walkway with bated breath, afraid that someone will eventually see you making your walk of shame to your room. when the silence continues, you finally begin to move, lithe steps only broken by the continuous hissing from your respirator as you occasionally take slight sips of air. 

nearing your room, your heart finally settles, your tensed back loosening up at the feeling of safety. you cross past one of the intersecting hallways, quick in your steps, when a hand reaches from the dark and grabs your wrist.

a scream nearly bubbles from your lips when a palm is shoved to your face, shutting you up once again. panicked eyes turn, trying to see who’s got such a strong hold on you, only for your heart to careen even faster when you make eye contact with quaritch.

no-

his sneer is terrifying, his bright amber eyes glinting with so much malice, it pins you right on the spot. cold dread washes over you like a tide, chasing away the quiet elation that settled deep within your veins. the heat is returning, you know that, but it is muted and mingled with fear that you can’t even feel the need to scratch the itch. 

your ears are pinned onto your skull, your tail drooping as it wraps itself around your leg again. this time the colonel doesn’t look at it in amusement, instead he continues to glare at you.

“colonel-” 

“next time, fuck around quietly,” quaritch barks out, cutting you off. “and go take a goddamn shower. you reek.”

he snatches his arm from your wrist as though he’s been burned before marching away, his combat boots echoing in the hallway. tears prick the back of your eyes and you run to your room, heaving, trying to calm yourself.

anger, hurt, and shame bubble deep inside your stomach, expanding, until you are finally reduced to tears. you cry your frustration away, hoping that by doing so, you would stop thinking about how good the colonel smelled as he glowered at you with his sharp eyes. 

(if only you had glanced at quaritch as he walked away, you would have seen the way he burrowed his face on his palm, chasing the sweet scent that roused him from his sleep and pushed his own heat into its beginnings.)

next

[hottakendragon]

HIHI I AM IN LOVE WITH UR WRITINF OMG. especially the most recent request AHHH!! was enthralled when I saw reqs were open!

can u do something with a REALLY jealous miles where he just fucks reader silly or he’s frustrated and takes his anger out on her iykwim? also could u put in an aftercare scene if that’s not to much to ask for, i ADORE how you portray miles as a big softie for his lover and i want more fluff with him

hi, omg, this is SO overdue. i got carried away! hope you enjoy <3

jealous/frustrated miles quaritch

recom miles quaritch x recom fem!reader

word count: 3k

warnings: smut, rough piv sex, exhibitionism if you squint?, biting, tiniest mention of blood, spanking??

Deja Blue celebrates a successful mission in the recreation room. it’s relaxed, just a small gathering amongst the squad, though Miles Quaritch is rarely one to mingle. so he remains posted against the wall, drowning out the squad in front of him. he stares blankly, disinterested at the RDA screensaver on the television that phases through images of pandora’s landscapes and bridgehead city.

but his attention will stray when your twinkling laugh fills the room. miles will watch you in your playfully animated movements and that smile that rounds your cheeks. miles expression rarely leaves a scowl, but it softens in the slightest as he observes you from his post.

you’re just being friendly, it’s your first mission as a freshly recruited recombinant, and you want to celebrate. conversation comes so naturally for you- you’re smiling and laughing and so unaware of the perverted looks Fike, Brown and Wainfleet and are giving you. they’re sharing glances and snickering like children, each of their lame innuendos falling on deaf ears.

when the conversation shifts, miles’ ears perk as fike very loudly makes a crude pass at you. it doesn’t land- there’s an awkward silence for about three seconds before lyle and brown struggle to hold in chortles of laughter, and you can only frown in embarrassment.

now there’s an even angrier scowl cracking over miles features, and he glares at sean with wide eyes that are flooding with rage. if the colonel were a rational man, he would just cut the guy off with a sharp quip and dismiss the whole team for trials. but he’s not, he’s fucking pissed off.

so instead, Quaritch is pushing off the wall, quickly approaching in big strides until he spins fike in his chair. miles snatches the loose collar of his shirt and rears back in a punch that crashes into the left side of his face. there’s an audible crack of bone.

Fike yelps, turning everyone’s attention and the room erupts in shock. in an instant, it goes eerily silent as the team recognizes their colonel in an ill sodden mood.

Quaritch hauls fike closer, looking down on him with teeth bared. he’s absolutely livid, cropped ears pinned against his head, his tail high and thrashing behind him.

“i don’t wanna hear none of that shit comin’ out of your mouth ever fucking again, private.” quaritch hisses at the soldier before knocking him back. fike is dazed, cradling his broken nose as he flops into the rolling chair. miles turns, looking over the squad.

“every single one of you fucks needs t’find something better to do than running your god damn mouths. dismissed!” quaritch barks at the team, sure to make eye contact with the three offenders.

you move to file out out of the room with the others when the colonel catches your arm, completely halting your steps.

“not you, corporal.”

his grip on you is tight and unrelenting, pressing so firmly into your flesh that you think it might even bruise. your eyes flicker to meet his gaze, a furrow to your brow

miles is already looking down on you, harsh and fierce. he’s so visually striking up close, eyes glowing and features downturned a deep frown

you blink at him and lick your lips nervously. you recover quickly, nodding curtly with your eyes lowered. the colonel doesn’t let go even as the automatic doors quietly hiss shut.

the air is silent for all of three seconds before quaritch is roughly pushing your shoulders, forcing you to catch yourself against the large table. he’s on you in a heartbeat, pinning you flatly on its surface. his long limbs capture you easily, and you hiss in frustration. the nerve of him! you thrash under his steady hold, grabbing and kicking at him.

“excuse me! what the fuck?! you-“

you’re cut off as his palm pushes against your mouth.

“y’better watch that tone, missy.” quaritch warns you.

your protests are mumbled as you push at his shoulders and chest, you even lick his palm to get him off you. the colonel doesn’t budge

“y’really wanna do this right now?” his voice raises, eyes piercing into you.

his expression sends a clear message. you take a steadying breath through your nose, silent but glaring.

“that’s what i thought, now shut up an’ listen. flirting with the squad ain’t part of the deal, you understand?” forefinger pointing in your face

“flirting!” you try to mumble behind his hand, squirming in disbelief because you would never flirt with those guys. gross.

Quaritch shakes his head in doubt. “don’t act like you weren’t. y’know you did wrong, n’ now you’ll face the consequence.” the colonel says lowly, his hungry gaze floating from your heaving chest to the frustrated wrinkle between your brows. his eyes flick between yours, capturing the shift from agitation to mild curiosity. he finds the smallest, yet brightest fleck of desire in your amber eyes, too.

miles is replacing his palm with his slick tongue shoving into your mouth. he takes your wrists, single-handedly pinning them above your head and slotting his body against yours. he dominates the kiss, mouth sliding roughly over your own. he even nips at your bottom lip, puncturing the soft flesh. he groans at the metallic taste of your blood on his tongue.

you’re both spread out, bodies almost too big for the table you lay on. miles grinds into you purposefully, half hard and working his dick right over your center. it’s torturous with the layers of fabric between you, and you push your hips up to meet his own, kissing him harder.

miles growls, then he’s rucking your tank top over your chest. he groans in approval when exposing your breasts. quaritch will bite and suck on the soft mounds, marking you. his teeth will sink into your flesh, indenting your skin. the sting of it is followed by his rough tongue licking flatly over the punctures. it’s a stark contrast to his fingers tickling over your ribs. you huff out a breath of air, a small sound you cannot hold in any longer.

then quaritch pulls away abruptly, standing above you.

“don’t move. that’s a fuckin’ order, squeak.” he commands in his deep american drawl.

you can only look up at him with hooded eyes. “yes, sir” you hum. you let your body arch teasingly, pushing your chest out into the chill air and wiggling your hips cutely.

your belly swims with the perceived praise of his chuckles, the sound purring and warm. he’s even grinning, his hands falling to his hips as he takes in every bit of you splayed out for him. his eyes linger over your face, enjoying how flustered you look already with blushing cheeks and eyes swimming with lust. his gaze travels to your chest, your nipples peaked after his sensual assault. then he’s following the curve of your hips, and he’s awfully offended by the rough fabric of those tiny little shorts you wear all the damn time.

his fingers hook into the waistband, pushing to reveal thin lace covering your cunt, adorned with a cute little bow under your navel.

“well, look at you, corporal. who are you wearin’ these for, huh? private fike? prager?” he asks, somewhat teasing you, tracing under the hem before letting the elastic snap against your hip. he won’t admit it, but there is a part of miles that genuinely wants to know. he bites his lip.

you fluster and shake your head vigorously, pouting at him. “no sir… i-i just like how they look, do you like them?” you wonder, a mix of embarrassment and want making you blush to your chest.

quaritch bunches the delicate lace at your hip, and you gasp as he rips it from your body. it stings, chafing the soft skin between your thighs. he smirks as your tail wraps around your calf, a new habit of yours when anxious.

he stands to his full height, heavy footsteps echoing in the large recreation room. you’re suddenly reminded where you are, where the walls are mostly glass, and the chances of someone passing by are 100 fucking percent. you panic a little, eyes darting to the sliding doors then searching for quaritch.

“colonel? um, could we make sure the shutters are active?” you hope.

your eyes follow him even if he doesn’t spare you a glance, his own eyes trained past the glass. the colonel’s heavy footsteps halt when standing directly behind you, and you’re forced to tilt your head back and watch him upside down.

he’s looking down at you, cradling your jaw. “you’ll be alright, hon’. now open your mouth,” he taps your cheek twice.

you’re nervous now, a little hesitant as you move your jaw, sticking your tongue out flatly.

“atta girl” miles rumbles, lightly slapping your cheek. his nimble fingers fall to work on his belt. the metal clanks loudly and you breathe in anticipation, your gaze drawn towards the straining bulge just inches in front of you.

quaritch makes quick work of it, humming as the zipper passes over his hard length.

his cock nearly hits you in the face, the way it bobs and stands in front of you. it’s thicker than any dick you’ve ever witnessed, longer too. it’s swollen to a pretty shade of indigo, a healthy pink at his tip. he’s beading with precum, and you watch as it gathers and trails alongside the vein gracing the underside of his cock. your mouth goes dry, and you swallow thickly.

“keep that mouth open, girl.”

you obey, stretching your jaw even wider as quaritch guides his leaking tip to your mouth. he’s soft with it at first, guiding his tip into your mouth and you hum at the salty taste of him. you kiss the tip sweetly, then begin leaving your wet tongue over his shaft.

the colonel hums. “you’re good, darlin’, take some more.” and you nearly gag as his length touches the back of your throat. you recover and find your rhythm, taking more as you bob your head.

eventually miles will be fucking your throat, grasping at your breasts as if they give him leverage to thrust into you.

“fuckn slut, can’t get enough of my dick down your throat, huh?” he growls, sending a series of quick slaps over your tits.

but you’re liking this too much, so he gets mean. he’ll shove inside your mouth, unmoving and letting your throat lurch tightly around his cock.

then miles will begin to touch you. you whine around his length when he pinches your nipples, calloused fingers rolling over the sensitive buds. he smacks the plump flesh of your breasts, and his fingers lightly trail to your soft center, touching your folds lightly before landing a quick slap on your pussy. it makes you jolt, your hips twitch and that earns you another slap.

“i gave you an order, corporal. quit fucking moving.”

and miles just keeps fucking your face. the the feeling’s too much, you’re gagging harshly and pushing your palm against his thigh to slow his thrusts, to no avail. he’s thoroughly using you, and you’re unable to do anything but simply take it. you remind yourself to breathe, trying to bob your throat at the same pace.

“there ya’ go, good girl,” quaritch moans, his syllables drawn out in pleasure. he lets two fingers push through your wet slit, running back and forth from your clit to your hole. you moan around him, and quaritch groans with satisfaction

“you’re so wet, it’s filthy. you gettin’ off on bein’ used like this? dirty girl,” quaritch smirks in a lustful haze. he’ll rub you quick and fast over your clit, making you squeal around his dick.

he’s hunched over you when he comes, letting a groan erupt from his chest. he pulls back to watch his seed slipping past your lips. you’re ruined, coughing and heaving for breath, eyes filled with tears and mouth so pretty and swollen.

“turn and face me,” quaritch would command you lowly. you pick yourself up,

your naked form agile, beautiful, flexible as you sit on the edge of the table. miles stands tall in front of you, eyes running wildly over your body and you watch him expectantly.

suddenly his hands are on you, holding your hips and lifting you off the table and your feet plop onto the cold ceramic floor. then quaritch is twirling your shoulders- pushing your chest against the table. it’s only moments before his dick slides into you, and it’s almost too much. there’s no going easy, just the sudden plunge of his dick into your body. it stretches you wide; a deep, burning ache inside of you. you pinch your eyes shut, waiting for the sensation to melt into pleasure.

“cmon, you can take more than that,” miles taunts. his palm presses right between your shoulder blades, pinning you as he delivers a series of long, deep thrusts. again, you remind yourself to breathe

“that’s it darlin’, loosen up for me. so fckn tight around my cock-“ he grits behind clenched teeth, picking up to a steady and delicious rhythm

his cock keeps pressing into that sensitive spot that nearly blinds you with pleasure. your eyes roll into your skull and you whine pathetically

“those virgins wouldn’t know what to do with you-“

miles’ abdomen presses against your back, leaning over you and biting the elongated cartilage of your ear. his hand takes your hip, angling you to take him even deeper and it makes you cry out, squirming under him.

“-wouldn’t know how to fuck this little pussy,” he mutters, his cheek presses to yours. you’re whimpering with every deep thrust, his cockhead ramming into your quivering insides.

miles tongue curls to catch the salty tears spilling over cheeks, caught in the feel of your tight spongy walls and the sweet sounds that fall from your parted lips

“workin’ me up, baby. gonna make me come inside that tight cunt-you want that, huh? want me to fill you up?” he growls into your ear, gripping your hips tighter.

you try your best to nod, cheek pressed into the table and hiding your whines behind your bitten lips.

“none of that, now. lemme hear you.”

then miles fingers are stuffing below your hips, smacking your clit before rubbing tight fast circles over the sensitive bundle.

your drawn like a bow with its arrow ready to fly, muscles quivering and aching for sweet release. your pussy is so tight around quaritch, locking around him to a point where he can no longer pull out of you, can only grind deeper into your slick heat.

“damn, kitty, you’re fuckin tight! you gonna come?” miles asks you mockingly, slowing his circles on your clit to match his lurid thrusts.

“yes sir!” you whine, broken moans clawing out of your chest

miles’ cheek presses to yours again. “tell me how good it is. tell me how good i’m fuckin’ you n’ how bad you wanna come.”

“s-so good! sir-i’m coming!” your sentence choppy with your cries of pleasure.

the bow inside of you snaps, and you scream with pleasure as you’re flooded with the hot sensation unfurling in your belly.

“that’s it, sugar, there ya’ go.” quaritch moans. your orgasm lasts so long, drawn out as miles keeps pushing into your cunt at a wild, fiery pace. he continues to rub across your clit, pressing harder when you attempt to squirm away

“i’m the only one allowed to have you like this, got it, squeak? no one else.” the colonel grinds behind his teeth, beginning to lose his rhythm as he fucks into you.

you can only cry out, your voice raw from the pleasure miles draws out of you. you’re shaking with overstimulation, letting these poor little whimpers fall from you plump mouth.

“shit! go on, honey. let everyone know who you belong to. you’re mine, now,” quaritch grits out. his grip on you is bruising, thrusts growing erratic as he chases the ache in his lower abdomen.

miles begins to let out his own breathy moans, rocking into you until he’s buried to the hilt. he grunts with a last few thrusts, and you whimper weakly at the feel of his cum spurting inside of you.

—

his body covers yours entirely, heavy as he comes down and settles his forehead between your shoulders. you slump against the table, hiccuping to catch your breath. quaritch is no better, breathing heavily against your back. you feel the tired ache through your body, and you’re grateful when miles pulls out of you. miles lifts himself, still holding your hips.

quaritch takes a moment to admire your form slumped against the table. your eyelashes are wet with tears, cheeks flushed and swollen mouth taking in stuttering hiccups of air. your hair is disheveled, bangs sticking to your skin and his eyes follow the braid that twists down your back. he follows the taper of your waist to your plump bum, and he can’t help but reach and squeeze at your flesh. he spreads you, watching his cum leak from your hole.

he notices your wobbly knees, smirking to himself. he finds your shorts, sliding them up your thighs and to your waist. he pulls your top to cover you properly, scoops you up in big arms and carries you towards the lounge

his hand splays across your back as he walks. “did good, kid, took it like a champ.” he settles into the cushions, pulling you across his lap. you tuck yourself into his chest.

“m’sorry if i was a bit rough on ya,”

there’s a beat of silence, until he finishes with “y’seemed to like it though,” he quirks, brows raising and letting out a dry chuckle that reveals his pink tongue and sharp canines.

you snort and roll your eyes playfully, hiding your face in his shoulder. he’s glad to see your reaction, he laughs and plants a kiss on your hair before resting his head on top of yours, cheek presses against your soft raven hair

you’re both silent for moment, your eyes flutter tiredly as miles’ fingertips run back and forth over your thigh.

“goddamn dickheads, let ‘em try sayin somethin’ stupid like that again. i won’t be so nice. fuckin’ morons,” quaritch grumbles, pouting.

notes: OH MY GOD. i’m so sorry, this is long overdue! ive been in a huge personal transition- job promotion, moving, all the things! and i wanted to do you justice with this request. i tend to characterize miles as a little softer than he actually is, and i hope i captured him a bit better this time around! hope you enjoy sweet sparklingenvy. always happy to see you in my inbox!

[onyxino]

In The Next Life

A chance encounter with what you thought was a random man leaves you more confused than ever when a dull pain etches its way into the back of you skull.

WC: 2.1k

CW: Angst. Hurt/Comfort. Eventual smut MDNI. Death. Gore. Grief. Past Lives. Modern AU.

It was the first time you’ve seen him but that’s impossible, Deja-vu maybe? No, you know him from somewhere but you just couldn’t place it. The stark white hair and crystal blue iris’, you feel like you know his features like the back of your hand.

‘Yo, are you okay?” he furrowed his brow. “I’d like to check out now.” He follows with an awkward chuckle.

Your eyes widened in horror as you come to realize you’ve just been standing here staring at this stranger. “My apologies sir! You just looked like someone.” you say as you quickly begin to bag up his items, They’re all extremely sweet, you make a mental note but for what purpose you have no idea.

He nodded his head not contributing to the conversation any further, you could feel his gaze drilling holes into the top of your skull. You suddenly felt clammy, he looked like someone but who?

“Alright Sir, that’ll be thirteen even!” You chirp, your inner customer service coming to surface. He pulled out his wallet and handed over the cash, the transaction finished without another word.

~ 

You’d like to say you had forgotten about the whole ordeal but you haven’t, his face, his mannerism, the sweets. They all seemed familiar to you, it was uncanny this feeling. It crept into your mind at every corner. Secretly you wished he’d come back in but also wishing you’d never see him again at the same time.

He crossed your mind every time you walked into the bakery, just like right now. You walked in at 6am sharp as you normally do. You let out a big sigh muttering  “Maybe, I'll see him today.” as you flicked the lights on bringing light to your hardwork and dreams. You opened the barkery 5 years ago when you turned 23. It had been a dream since you were small, you’ve always loved baking but you were never a sweets kind of person. An “Odd One.” Your mom called you for taking up an interest and then career in something you didn’t like to partake in yourself.

You smiled at the irony of it. Walking into the back you slid your apron on and readied up for the day.

~

3pm rolls around and you served quite a few patrons, today had been very busy to say the least. You almost had your mind off the mystery man which was very rare these days until you heard the door chime. “I’ll be with you in a second” your sing-song voice rang out through the lobby.

A smile plastered on your face until you turned around, standing before you was him, the man with the white hair and blue eyes. “I’m starting to think ya find me disturbingly ugly or something…” he said, shifting his weight to one leg and crossing his arms.

“NO- I mean no.” You stammer looking toward the ground “You just look like someone.”

“You said that last time, sweetheart, exactly who is it that I look like?” The question had you frozen on the spot. Who did he look like? 

“I really don’t know if I'm honest with you.” You sigh, shrugging your shoulders, tossing your rag aside and stepping up to the counter.

“Funny, cuz’ I was gonna say the same thing.” You cock your head at this “You look an awful lot like someone I know too.”

“I can guarantee we have neve met before.” You say swallowing the lump in your throat.

“Take your hat off and let your hair down.” You do as you’re told and his breathing hitches as if he's just choked up about something.

“Y/n.” Your eyes feel as if they are about to fall out of your head. 

“How do you know my name?” You question taking a step back, you have a slight pain in the back of your head now, it's dull.

“I really don’t know, I just felt that was your name?” He said not even sure of himself, your name just slid off his tongue with such ease.

“Well then what’s yours then?” You shoot back a little too eagerily.

“Satoru.” He said, waiting for your reaction. You face contorted as if you were thinking and it stayed that way for a few seconds. An image flashed in front of your eyes of the same man, only his hair is up and his eyes are covered but you just know it’s him.

“Your last name is Gojo?” You said maintaining direct eye contact.

“Maybe you know that from my credit card!” He accuses, trying to debunk this mind fuck of an interaction.

“I don't accept credit here, Gojo.” You point out, gesturing to the sign that reads ‘Cash Only’ on the front counter.

He just stares at you, his mind clouded with thought, looking for explanations, reasonings. Stuff like this just doesn't happen, only in movies. It’s all smoke in mirrors. The dull ache in the back of your head builds slowly. It’s almost as if your brain is working too hard and is overheating “Let me touch you .” your mouth moves faster than you mind.

Gojo’s face contorts into something of disgust. “Uh lady,are you out of your mind?” it felt like more of a statement than a question, and honestly you might as well have been.

“Hey you told me to take my hair down and I did that! Just lemme’ touch your hand or something.” You defend as you round the counter and start toward him.

He doesn’t protest , extending his hand to meet you and when you touch it feels like electricity. Shock waves send up your arm and down your spine, the pain in the back of your head intensifies just for a second as your vision blackens.

~~~~~~

“Gojo, you are absolutely insufferable.” A voice rings out, was it yours? It was yours. Though the comment was an insult, your voice sounded so airy and happy. Your vision clears and you come to see you’re in a traditional japanese school yard, the building is old and wooden but the well maintained and beautiful, safe feeling, as if there is a shield around it.

“Oh c’mon Mochi, I'm not that bad! It was a funny joke, laugh a lil.” A second voice chimed in from behind you, you turned to come face to face with the same man who just seconds ago was in your bakery. He looks the same, just dressed differently, his hair is up, sporting a black blindfold and what looks to be a black uniform just like the image that flashed before you only seconds ago.

“Your jokes aren’t funny, they’re cringe and only seven year olds laugh at them.” You say rolling your eyes.

“I’ll get ya one day, Mochi,” He says with a cocky grin.

The dull pain at the base of your skull returns, once again your vision fades to black.

~~~~~~ 

Your vision returns you to your current setting, quickly you pull your hand away from him. Your eyes quickly meet his and he looks like he’s seen a ghost.

“Did you-” you start.

“Yes.” he cuts you off.

“The same exact thing?” You press.

“Yes.”

You feel shaky and you swallow the lump in your throat “Who exactly are you?” you ask, rubbing the back of your head the dull pain slowly dissipating.

“I should be asking you the same thing.” he shoots back.

“Did you recognize anything about where we were?” You ask maybe he’s been there, but it seems like you have been too, and yet you have no answers.

“I mean yeah, but in my twenty-eight years of living I have never once been there….but it all seems so familiar.”  he replies, shaking his head and bringing his hand to cradle his face.

“Well there is no doubt that we are dealing with something supernatural here.” You say, the look he dawns on his face is one of skepticism

“Hardly, we are probably just both sick or something.” He defends.

“How so? If we were sick, how would we feel and see the same hallucination? It doesn’t work like that, Gojo.” He cringes at the use of his name, as if it were painful.

“Dude, I have no idea but I think I need to get out of here.” He frimley states and turns to head toward the door.

“WAIT-” You call and he halts in his tracks “ At least give me your number so we can keep in touch. What if this furthers or-”

“Absolutely not, it's not gonna go any further cause we both are just sick or something, you should have this place checked for a gas leak.” He says roughly grabbing the door handle and throwing himself out the door.

~~~

Gojo shakes his head vigorously as he starts down the sidewalk of the bustling Tokyo streets. To him this was all a bunch of “fictitious bullshit.” 

But he couldn't deny this actually happened. It was probably some sort of gas leak in your bakery that caused both of you to go temporarily insane. He sighed as he made his way to his apartment, he was a little bummed he wanted to get something sweet for himself and your sweets were actually really good.

Sighing, he unlocked his apartment door and walked inside, the air felt stale and he felt this immediate sense of tired wash over him, he glanced at the clock. 4pm already, in just a few short hours he will have to head to bed, his highschool kids have a huge exam in the morning and he can’t afford to be tired.

Being a teacher wasn’t necessarily something he saw himself doing. In all honesty he hated the system and the only reason he put 110% of himself into this was because he wanted to reform the system to shape these kids into freethinkers. Into what the next generation really needs for leaders.

He let out an exhausted sigh and bent down to pick up a stack of graded papers from the coffee table. As he did this the subtle pain at the base of his skull returned to him. Gojo felt dizzy, like he needed to sit and now, plopping himself down on the couch he threw his head back and shut his eyes.

~~~~~

“GOJO SENSEI!” A voice called from behind him, turning he took in the appearance of a teenage boy who was running at him full speed he was almost concerned he wouldn't stop in time. The boy was just a foot in height difference, pink hair with a brown undercut, he couldn't help but smile at him. So full of energy.

“What’s up,Yuuji.” The words left his mouth like he’s said them before. Yuuji? That’s this boy’s name.

“YO! So, I need to show you something cool. I was sparring with Panda and we kinda got a lil rough and-” The boy then produces a detached stuffed animal arm from behind his back. 

He grimaced at the sight, “This boy isn't right.” he thought but the grimace faded into a smirk “Take him to Yaga.” again the words left him like they were routine like this was a normal occurrence for him and this boy.

“Sure thing! I just wanted to show you I’m getting stronger! I’m taking on the third year’s like they are nothing!”  The boy chanted fist pumping the air. Gojo couldn't help but widened his smile at this.

“Yuuji is definitely getting stronger.” He thought as if he knew this boy, as if he’s watched this kid grow up or something. 

Yuuji with his smile as big and as bright as ever turned and ran off the direction he came in.

~~~~~~

Gojo sat up with a gasp, his face covered in sweat. Wetness streamed down his face but not from his forehead but from his eyes….was he crying? Did seeing this boy make him cry? Surely not, he didn't even know this kid! At least he thought he didn't but everything about him seemed so familiar just like you had when he first saw you. The setting for this dream or hallucination or whatever you wanna call it was the same setting he saw the both of you two in previously.

He glanced at the clock again this time it read 8pm. He furrowed his eyebrows “There's no way I was out for four hours!?” he said aloud and quickly stood up. Muttering something about you paying for his medical bills as he stormed off towards his bedroom.

~~~~~

So that's just a lil snippet of what I'm currently working on…..I haven’t written for a very long time but I felt I need to come back to help me cope. If you know you know. I really wanna turn this into a series so just lemme know what you think (don't be mean to me I will cry)

I PROOFREAD BUT IM ALSO DYSLEXIC SO TAKE IT EASY