#death eats pizza with a knife a fork?

[batcavescolony]

Supernatural s5 e21

Pestilence is still making people sick. Cass is human. Bobby might sell his soul to Crowley. Pestilence hates Sam and Dean for killing his brothers so he's making them sick. Cass showed up and saved the day, he took a bus and everything. Bobby sold his soul to Crowley, Sam “did you kiss him?" Bobby "No!" Crowley *pulls out phone* Bobby "WHY DID YOU TAKE A PHOTO?!“. The Croatoian virus is being spread through a vaccine. Death has been introduced and what an intro. Cass is moping Bobby gave him a suck it up pep talk. Crowley gave Dean Death's weapon and he gave Bobby the use of his legs back. Cass Bobby and Sam storm the demon distribution center while Dean and Crowley go to kill death. Death willingly gave up his ring if Dean let Sam jump into hell.

[articskele]

EEEEEEEEHEHEHEHEHE >:D

*points at August* NOW LEMME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS GUY

August Halcyon Cecropia is a rugged survivor of the elements. He built everything from the ground up, creating an isolated town in the mountains. He fought and defeated a dragon (which we'll get to later). And he's actually a really effective and well-loved ruler.

The town has a huge emphasis on fire and cooking and the hearth. They hold huge feasts and make bonfires. The place is super welcoming to travelers, and they make a darn good stew.

And August's design reflects this; warm colors, a big ol fluffy cloak resembling moth wings, a warm smile, he just looks huggable! He's a Facebook dad who makes corny jokes and drinks root beer! He would read books to worms as a kid! I picture him awkwardly holding a torch up to some homemade creme brulee trying to toast the top of it-

But behind all that, something's a little off. He's actually a manipulative bastard and a cult leader, and he's poisoned quite a few people- But he's subtle about it. Ya don't realize something's wrong until you're in too deep. And that's where Daffodil (aka cat mum) and Artic come in.

Daffodil was August's wife, Artic's mom, and secretly a werecat with plant powers. Realizing that this is not a healthy environment, and wanting Artic to have a better future, she runs away with her daughter.

Timeskip to Artic as an adult. She's all but forgotten her childhood in the mountains due to her brain suppressing her own bad memories- But then, she meets someone who seems familiar, but she can't quite put a finger on it. He says he's her father, that he's wanted nothing more than to see his daughter after all these years. He's so proud of how much she's grown, and he invites her and her best friend Kat to a little town in the mountains for dinner.

Artic eventually gets her memories back and realizes just how shitty August is (also he was trying to assassinate Kat this whole time), and shit really starts hitting the fan-

A majestic, bright, angelic looking dragon descents from the cloudy skies like a star; a force of calamity that August drove off a long time ago, as seen by the scar over one of its eyes. Except Artic figures out that the dragon is herbivorous; it isn't actually the threat everyone thinks it is.

August and Artic are largely opposites. Fire and ice, one conquers while the other understands. So Artic manages to calm the dragon instead of fighting it, and everyone's eyes turn to their leader with suspicion.

August relies on other people for power, and he was able to achieve his position by taking advantage of everyone's desperation in this unforgiving landscape. After all, people are easier to manipulate when they're physically tired out. Something something moths attracted to an open flame.

But if no one's there to believe or follow him? He's just a pathetic old man. So when his people turn against him and he's cast out into the wilderness, the first thing he does is try to tame the wolves. But to no avail.

This is a free post to talk about whatever you want about your OC! Infodump about them or share an interesting fact!

[dramaticdean]

in 5x21 the chat with death scene at the pizzeria is unrealistic because dean would never eat that deep dish chicago pizza with a fork and knife. you know he's digging into that shit sloppy style

[candiso-p640]

Jack Hause

Jack Hause is the Ultimate Circus Performer and is the Chapter one victim of the EddsworldXDanganropa AU.

Backstory: Jack Hause was born on October 3rd, 1999 (Age 23) in Berlin, Germany. For years, Jack was forced to work in their parents' traveling circus with their two sisters. Their mother Linda Callmann would gaslight Jack and their sisters (Alice and Ada Hause) while she withheld any feelings of love (she never loved her kids, she saw them as tools.). Without fail, she would nitpick Jack's performance even if they performed so well that it would be award-worthy.

One hot and dry day on July 15th, 2012 (Jack was 12 at the time), while Linda Hause was performing a fire-breathing trick, Linda was set on fire by the trick and as the tent began to burn down, Linda, a clown, a lion named Goldherz, and 10 other circus patrons burned to death within the inferno in the plains where the circus was taking place.

After the event, their father Emil Hause had to take care of them and their sisters in the best way he could.

Jack never had many friends growing up, and the way they tries to be friendly tends to annoy people. As a result, Jack has loneliness and depression from the lack of an outlet.

Facts about Jack Hause:

Jack Hause is 5''5 feet tall.

Jack Hause is non-binary (They-Them)

Jack is omnisexual.

Jack is a virgin. And that's okay.

Jack Hause's favorite food is a ham sandwich. Jack's favorite candy is Circus Peanuts (that weird marshmallow kind)

Jack would occasionally juggle things around including but not limited to Ruben's glasses, pens, paper balls, cola cans, and sticks.

Jack loves haunted houses and will squeal whenever they are in one.

Diwi and Jack are drinking buddies!

Jack is able to perform the Wheel of Death (space wheel), but faints if they has to be tied to any board for a impalement art.

Jack's sisters dream jobs are to be an teacher (Ada) and an astronaut (Alice) respectively. Jack's dream job is to be an actor.

Jack's favorite holiday is Three Kings Day.

Jack would chug 1 liter of drinkable cheese on a 15 British Pound dare before passing out.

Jack has an unbearable laugh.

If Jack Hause was to go camping with someone in tents. Jack would take the air bed the person is sleeping to the nearest lake, push the bed to float on the lake. Jack would wait for the victim to wake up to see them try and splash into the water to escape the lake.

Jack will be the type of person to eat pizza with a knife and fork. Just to make fun of people.

[katsidhe]

Please. Why, in 05.21, does death keep talking about how good the pizza is? When he is clearly? Eating a quiche?? Or something??? Knife and fork and everything. Is this an American thing?? Is everything that's flat but not a pancake à pizza ? Please god somebody explain this to me I can't take it he keeps talking about pizza. He is not eating pizza!

Hahaha, but he IS eating pizza: it’s Chicago-style deep dish pizza! It does resemble a pie or quiche more than a more typical pizza, because it’s baked in a pan with the sauce on top, but I assure you that it is still termed pizza.

[fealtyfaggot]

My dearest followers & all others to whom this may arrive. I am posting this to entreat with you. To plead with you. To beseech you to vote for Lord Vetinari. What follows is a list of information about him, which doubles as evidence on why he should, in fact, win the Weird Strange Guy Battle.

Lord Vetinari

Has banned mimes from the city-state he rules on pain of imprisonment and death

Reads sheet music instead of listening to it because that is its purest form.

Has Leonardo da Vinci trapped in his attic

Spent an entire book trapped in a jar (as a lizard)

Talks to rats

Went to boarding school (for assassins), studied dance there, was bullied for being autistic

His nemesis is the crossword lady from his city's newspaper

Has an official impersonator

Gets hordes of unofficial impersonators put in a psychiatric ward

Juggles instinctively with great skill, having never done it before

Eats a diet of pretty much exclusively bread and water, exceptions to this include one (1) cheese sandwich, an egg white (carefully separated with a knife and fork), and a very dubious pizza

Kills a guy by saying "Boo."

Almost has his career ruined with a custard pie (pineapple flavoured)

Does hopscotch, "calves twinkling"

Oldest friend is a milfy vampire. They play long-distance chess and spy on each other.

Is Fantasy Machiavelli

"Traumatised by caviar at an early age," in the words of @higgsbison

People get into political debates over whether he's gay

Allows himself to be poisoned as enrichment for his employee

Has a really smelly dog named Wuffles which is, at first sight, often assumed to be dead

Had a modern artist nailed to a post by the ear

That concludes Vetinari Propaganda Hour, please vote for my strange old man.

[commander-kirschtein]

modern!au random quirks headcanons for the aot veterans

i’m back bitches with more brain rotting headcanons (if you want to see the ones for the 104th they’re here and if you think i should do some for the warriors then let me know!) - mac

masterlist

erwin smith:

erwin has the loudest fucking sneezes, like you jump out of your skin when he does it.

definitely texts with proper grammar and punctuation. never used an emoji in his life.

eats pizza with a knife and fork.

don’t ask him to take a picture of you. it will be blurry and his finger will be in the frame (why do all my headcanons make him sound like a grandpa lmao.)

doesn’t have spotify/apple music because he still listens to cds!! he’s got a massive collection of them hoarded in his house and car (don’t you dare put a cd in the wrong case unless you want to feel his wrath.)

levi ackerman:

he has every group chat he’s ever been invited to on mute. would only ever open them just to get rid of the notification bubble.

talks to children and babies like fully grown adults.

wears headphones even if he isn’t listening to music so strangers don’t disturb him.

levi’s also the master of untangling headphones, or anything that needs untangling for that matter (he’s petra’s go-to necklace untangler.)

paints his nails black and wears a few rings on each hand “because it will hurt more if i ever need to punch someone.” (“okay but the nail varnish??” “oh that’s just because i think it looks hot.”)

hange zoe:

never shuts up about conspiracy theories - even if they don’t believe them they’ll spend hours watching videos about them on youtube (“moblit did you know that beyoncé is part of the illuminati-” “go to sleep hange it’s 3am.”)

is double jointed and isn’t afraid to show people at the strangest of times (“hange no one at the store wants to see how you can twist your body into a pretzel!”)

refuses to go to a doctor unless they’re on the brink of death. not to mention they’re the most accident prone person on this planet (moblit suggested that they wrap them self in bubble wrap - they actually did it much to his dismay.)

has three cats with really human names if that makes sense?? probably called phil, sandra and dave.

will only eat cereal at night. they will refuse it for breakfast but will eat 3 bowls between 9pm and 11pm.

mike zacharias:

i saw this drawing once of mike doing woodwork and i have come to the conclusion that yes, he is a DIY husband! he makes gifts out of wood for his friends but he will also put together your IKEA furniture, fix your boiler and put up that shelf you’ve been meaning to put up for 8 months. he’s just the best.

go-to person if you ever can’t open a can or a lid. mike is undefeated when it comes to opening things.

he and erwin definitely got drunk and dressed up in drag (petra did the makeup and nanaba has pictures.)

cracks his knuckles like 5 times a day. if you ask him he’ll crack your knuckles for you.

is the person who will ask what drinks people want and make them for everyone (he’s a sweetheart.)

moblit berner:

definitely has a karaoke sesh every time he’s in the shower. hange has secretly recorded for blackmail purposes.

is that person who locks their car doors twice for good measure.

bought a pregnancy pillow because he likes to be comfy.

took a first aid course because he was sick and tired of hange burning them self every time they cooked dinner.

mixed a bunch of spirits together once and called it his ‘cocktail of death.’ he had to get his stomach pumped the very same night.

nanaba:

get her to braid your hair, she’s amazing at it. she can do really cool french braids and fish braids and it looks so pretty !!

definitely the ‘mom’ friend. always the designated driver (okay but imagine nanaba having to put up with a drunk erwin and mike that’s so funny - “erwin did i ever tell you that i fucking love you so much?” “oh mike, buddy, i love you too.” “okay lovebirds it’s time for bed.” )

bakes a lot and makes the best fucking brownies and cakes ever. every weekend she will bake and bring whatever she makes into work on monday and everyone loves her for it.

can fall asleep anywhere. mike once found her asleep on the floor next to her bed because she was too tired to get into the bed itself.

has a knack for interior design. knows what looks good and what matches. her house looks like an IKEA showroom.

petra ral:

okay but why can i see petra going to zumba twice a week?

snorts when she laughs. she’s also got that kinda laugh that makes you laugh yourself so you just spend 10 minutes laughing for no reason.

wears cute dangly earrings all the time. always got the perfect manicure too (”just in case i need to scratch oluo’s eyes out for looking at my ass for the tenth time today.”)

you know when you walk past a stranger and get a whiff of their scent and it’s like, really nice? yeah, petra is that stranger.

organises the birthday cards and secret santa for her friends and workplace every year.

oluo bozado:

probably drives just over the speed limit because he thinks he’s cool (until he gets pulled over and given a ticket lmao.)

drenches every meal in mayonnaise. doesn’t season his meat either (disgusting.)

won’t open doors for people unless he thinks they’re attractive.

obnoxiously yawns loudly and probably chews with his mouth open (apologies to oluo fans, i just see him as being super fucking annoying ahahah.)

cuts the crusts off his sandwiches. also refuses to eat the crust on pizza.

gunther schultz:

made an instagram for his dogs. doesn’t even have a personal instagram, he just wants the world to see how cute his dogs are.

if you’re on a roadtrip, pass gunther the aux cord, he’s got the best taste in music.

always wins card games - from poker to UNO, he will always win.

has loads of old gaming consoles for nostalgia purposes. he is unbeatable on smash bros and mario kart, don’t even attempt to challenge him - you will lose.

such a good cheesy party dancer. pulls out the moonwalk and the robot every time.

eld jinn:

always wearing plaid?? does he own anything else? We will never know.

gives everyone head pats and fist bumps.

will do that really annoying thing where he goes ‘what’s that on your shirt’ so you look down and he flicks your face with his finger.

touches the top of the door frame every time he walks through one.

if anyone ever asks him to do something, he responds with ‘yes chef’ (and on that note, watches loads of gordon ramsey. quotes him at least 6 times a day - including calling oluo an ‘idiot sandwich.’)

[nad-zeta]

Mitsuhide- Mealtime Mayhem

Fandom: Ikesen

Pairings: Mitsuhide x Reader

Genre: Fluffffff

Words: 1700+

Comments: Eeeeep HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINEKO!!!! Whooop Whooop! //dances around ❤❤Hope you have the best day! ❤😳🥺! 🥺😳❤🌈 @mineko811

.*:・’ﾟ:｡.*:ﾟ･’ﾟﾟ:。’ .*:・’ﾟ:｡.*:ﾟ･’ﾟﾟ:。’･ﾟ｡.*:・’ﾟ: ｡.*:・’ﾟ:｡.*:ﾟ･’ﾟﾟ

You reached for the doorknob of your shared apartment, key turning slowly as you went to step inside. Feet aching after the long day at work, you passed through the doorway, excited to greet your lover but instead being met with a puff of white smoke. Your hand shot up to cover your mouth as a cough ripped through your chest. You dared to trudge deeper into the apartment, kicking your heels off and leaving the door ajar— in hopes that the smoke would disperse to hopefully at least restore some of your vision.

You felt around the room blindly, cautiously walking to avoid stubbing your unsuspecting toes against any chair legs or counter corners.

You spotted him there— amid the smoke— white hair blending in all so perfectly. That dense mist-like smoke creating an eerie feel of mystery and danger, perfect to disguise the mischievous fox within. You couldn’t help but think it suited him.

You sauntered up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist and standing up onto the very top of your tippy toes to peek over his shoulder to see the absolute disaster he was creating. “Whatcha making there love?” you asked curiously, giving him a loving peck on the cheek.

Mitsuhide turned around, a snakelike smile plastered across his features as if there was nothing out of the ordinary— as if he wasn’t there setting your house on fire with his culinary train smash.

He expertly evaded the question— master of avoidance and deception— or so he liked to claim—standing in front of the smoking mess, to shield it from your prying eyes. “Welcome home, my dearest mouse,” he beamed, holding your cheeks hostage between his hands to keep your eyes focused solely on him.

To humour him or not to humour him, that is the question?

Making your choice, you ducked down around him, shaking your head at the scene in front of you. “What in the world? Are you trying to imitate your latest investigation?” you teased, shooting him a playful little grin over your shoulder.

“It’s nothing to be concerned with, my dearest; now pray tell how your day has been,” he hummed out, trying once more to distract you with hands falling onto your hips, nuzzling his nose against you lovingly.

“My day,” you started, sparing the dodgy pan a final glance before turning to shrug off your coat as you took up residence atop a nearby kitchen counter. “ Was busy as usual, nothing to write home about,” you reported nonchalantly.

It was a long and tedious day, filled with the usual work, politics and chaos, certainly not the most ideal way you wanted to spend your birthday. On the contrary, you wanted nothing more than to spend your birthday at home, with Mitsu. Guilt tugged at your heart when you thought back to the morning— being greeted with soft cuddles and golden eyes filled with a dazzling glint of excitement at the prospect of a day off. He rarely got time off, and your heart sank even further, knowing the amount of effort and strings that needed to be pulled to allow it. Yet alas, the universe had different plans for you, as shortly after hearing out all the thrilling plans he had made, you had gotten a call summoning you into work.

“Whiskey?” you sighed out, breaking the comfortable silence that fell between the two of you. Without waiting for an answer, you reach across the counter to take hold of the whiskey bottle and two glasses. You poured the golden liquid into the glasses, adding a few ice cubes before holding one out towards Mitsuhide.

“My, are you certain you would not like to write home about your day? The stiff drink certainly is telling, mouse”, he teased with amusement and hints of concern, swishing the knife in the air casually before cutting up some onions and throwing it with the unidentified contents of the still smoking pan.

“Would you write back if I do,” you met his tease with a tired smile, handing him his drink and clicking your glass with his.

Mitsuhide simply shook his head, chuckling while taking a sip of the golden rye. “If your heart desires it, little one, now wash up. Dinner shall be ready momentarily,” he nodded, turning back the pan and adding some water from the kettle with brows furrowed in concentration, causing even more smoke to rise up.

You hummed contently, hopping off the counter, changing from your work clothes into your PJs— not wanting to linger too long; after all, you did want a kitchen to come back to. You crossed the threshold of the dining room only to see Mitsuhide set out two bowls onto the dining table with a proud smirk plastered across his face.

You swallowed, preparing yourself for the horror that was the meal you were to eat. Making your way closer, you inspected the bowl of goo with wide eyes. “So what do we have on the menu tonight chef,“ you asked, slipping into your seat—hoping to delay the inevitable as long as possible.

Mitsuhide shrugged and booped your nose in response, “just a simple meal made with love.”

You hummed, picking up a fork —ooh, you could not bring it over your heart to take a bite— so instead, you just moved the food around in the bowl like a fussy child at dinner time.

“Gracious, you’re not even touching your food, my love. Here, shall I help you.”

He scooped up a healthy helping of the sludge-like substance onto a spoon and held it out for you to taste. Your lips pursed, eyes narrowing at its contents. What in the 7 hells was this supposed to be? He brought the spoon closer to your lips, leaning forward to rest his chin on his other hand.

“Come now, little one, how are you to grow into a mighty mouse if you don’t eat the special birthday meal your husband lovingly prepared for you, hmm."

“I don’t think I will grow at all if I eat that; if anything, I think death will be imminent,” you quipped back.

“My my, how you wound me so, if you keep rejecting me, I may very well just burst into tears,” Mitsuhide sighed out dramatically, bringing his hand over his heart in mock hurt— yet the way his golden eyes shone told you he was anything but hurt.

“Fine! Fine!” you finally huffed out, turning your face back, wrapping your hand around his to bring the spoon to your mouth. Only a little taste, you thought with a gulp. You stopped short of your lips, praying to any and every god that you would be spared from the horrors of food poisoning.

Oh, how he tried, it warmed your heart, really it did, but the culinary genius inside you was screaming. Finally, you closed your lips around the spoon, letting the flavours coat your tongue; whatever it was, it was beyond fixing, so much so that you could almost hear Gordon Ramsay’s comments of the meal echoing in your head. Of course, the texture would be fine, Mitsuhide could execute that part well enough, but the taste, GOD, the flavour was a dead giveaway of a certain someone’s taste or rather lack thereof.

You swallowed the contents, trying to school your features into a carefree smile, only the delicate muscles of your face had not gotten the memo, instead pulling into a sour, scrunched up expression. “Mmm, this is great,” you managed to get out, sounding far less sincere than you had meant it to.

Mitsuhide, on the other hand, burst into a fit of cackling laughter. You realized then, you had been played. The cackling continued even after you narrowed your eyes, sending him an icy glare,” oh dearest, this is precisely why I love teasing you so.”

You crossed your arms and turned your face away with a ‘Hmpf.’

He tried to get your attention, but each time you turned away with a huff. “Has a cat caught my darling wife’s tongue,” came the amused words from the man you loved so dearly as he curled a stray lock of your hair around his fingers.

You dared to cautiously sneak a glance at him, only to see a broad grin littered with mischief. You quickly turned your face away once more, fearing he might see straight past your pouting facade. With mischief marrying his eyes, his hands moved toward your sides to tickle you mercilessly, “perhaps I shall use my skills as a detective to get you talking.”

You held out as long as you could, but the ticklish sensation caused laughter to bubble from your chest, “M-Mitsu s-stop, -stop,” uncontrollable laughter wasn’t the only sound to file into the room as your stomach let go of a large growl in hunger.

Of course, you had not eaten all day and, that, whatever it was, was less than satisfying to the taste buds.

Mitsuhide continued to chuckle as he shook his head, pulling out his phone to give it a sparring glance, “truly you amuse me to no end, my love.”

He leaned forward to kiss the tip of your nose while gracefully swooping up the unfinished bowl of goop. Taking elegant strides back to the kitchen, he shot you a smile from over his shoulder, “the pizza should be here soon,” the confession finally came.

Jumping from your seat, you ran after him. “You massive troll!” you accused, rolling your eyes and reclaiming your spot on the countertop to wait for the ACTUAL food to arrive while watching him clean his mess.

“How you flatter me so,” he purred out, slithering closer to you. That earned him another roll of the eyes, yet, you still found yourself inching closer to rest your forehead against his as you exchanged loving smiles. He met your soft lips in a fleeting kiss, then, hand coming up to cradle the back of your head.

“Happy birthday, my dearest,” was all he said, planting one more kiss onto your lips. You felt him slip something into your hair, and before you could question, his phone rang, causing him to turn on his heel and attend to it.

With a dazzling smile, you gazed upon the bellflower pin he had placed into your hair. His features softened as he matched your smile with one full of love for you. One thing was for sure, Mitsuhide may be an incorrigible tease, but you knew when it came down to it, he loved you with all his heart.

[jar-of-ectoplasm]

La Squadra Masterlist

~Risotto Nero~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Risotto's Confession (GN Reader)

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Curing their S/O's Migraine (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Prosciutto~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Prosciutto Comforting his Insecure! S/O (GN Reader)

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Pesci~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Illuso~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Curing their S/O's Migraine (GN Reader)

-Gas Station Date (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Formaggio~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Gas Station Date (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Ghiaccio~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Curing their S/O's Migraine (GN Reader)

-Gas Station Date (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Melone~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Melone w/ a Stressed! S/O (GN Reader)

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Curing their S/O's Migraine (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Taking Care of Sick Melone (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Sorbet and Gelato~

Platonic:

-Playing Twister (GN Reader)

-Protective/Brotherly La Squadra (GN Reader)

-Handling Your Death (GN Reader)

Romantic:

-Reader's Confession (GN Reader)

-Cuddling Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Beach Day (GN Reader)

-Nicknames (GN Reader)

-Your Song (GN Reader)

-Random Fluff Headcanons (GN Reader)

-Accidental Confession (GN Reader)

~Misc./Not x Reader~

-General Headcanons

-La Squadra's Fav Horror Movies

-La Squadra watching you eat pizza w/ a knife and fork

-La Squadra's Music Taste

-How La Squadra Plays Minecraft

-Cursed La Squadra Ass

-Sexuality+Gender Headcanons

[bellshells]

A Moment of Bliss

REQUEST: I would love a Sirius x Reader x Lupin smut, where they treat her like a whore but are really cute afterwards. 

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader x Remus Lupin Warnings: Mentions of war, Alcohol, Langauge, Smut (oh good dear lord the smut) Summary: Reader decides that everyone needs a break, and after a nice meal some naughty shit goes down.  Word Count: 6.7k+

  You sighed and rubbed your eyes. It was all too much, there was news daily now and none of it was good. Seeing the smiling faces of Marlene McKinnon and her parents on the cover of The Daily Prophet had caused you to fear the worst. You watched as Marlene’s father kissed her cheek as her mother waved, they were celebrating Marlene’s birthday when that picture was taken, she looked truly beautiful. You remember it well, how you had laughed and danced, a welcome break from the horrors of the war. You remembered with a smile how lucky Marlene’s parents had felt that they were able to bring Marlene’s friends together to celebrate their special girls’ birthday. You couldn’t believe their luck either now, how terrible it was. It had been months since they had been murdered, yet seeing her face plastered across the front page of The Daily Prophet caused your heart to ache with grief.

You felt a tentative touch on your shoulder and reached with trembling fingers to clasp the hand there, and leant your cheek against it.   “You shouldn’t read it if it makes you upset.” A soft voice said behind you, you chuckled darkly and turned to face him.   “Then I wouldn’t read anything at all, Remus.” You paused; your lip quivered as you gazed at the face of your lost friend. “I just can’t believe she’s gone.” You replied, you tried to smile at Remus but stopped short as his brow furrowed in concern.   “Have you seen the awful guff that Skeeter woman has written about her?” Sirius called from the doorway, he wore a grim expression and held his own copy of the Prophet in his hand. “We can’t let this go unpunished, Moony.” Remus nodded and gave your shoulder a subtle squeeze.   “I know, but we must act cautiously, Sirius. We can’t let her death be in vain. You’re no use to anybody if you get yourself killed.”   “Dreadful.” You added quietly, more to yourself than to anybody else. Sirius stalked into the room, his eyes never on one spot for more than a few seconds.   “How is it that we are expected to do nothing? After everything that’s happened, after everything we’ve…sacrificed. It isn’t enough!” Sirius stalked to the tapestried wall and punched it hard, he groaned as he pulled his hand away and shook it fiercely. The rooms of Grimmauld Place were quiet now, what once had been busy as the headquarters for The Order of the Phoenix, were now still as more and more allies lost their lives. Remus was upon his friend in an instant, he grasped Sirius by the shoulders and tried to calm him.   “We mustn’t fall apart, brother. Not now.” Remus breathed, he took Sirius’ face in his hands and forced the bearded man to look in his eyes. “We haven’t come this far for nothing. She was special, one in a million, and I promise she will be avenged.” Sirius was defiant for a moment, he tried to free himself from Remus’ grip; but after a second more, he relented and sighed.   “Yes.”

  You stood quietly and made your way over to the two men; you hadn’t been close friends at school. You hadn’t been particularly close during the beginning of the war; but as the numbers thinned out as more and more people were killed, you clung to those who you knew you could trust. You slipped in between the two men and grasped both of their hands.   “Let’s go and get some food. It’s been a long day, let’s have a drink for Marlene. She wouldn’t want us to mope about.” You looked between them, a sad smile settled onto Remus’ scarred mouth and Sirius squeezed your hand in agreement. You nodded at them both and lead them from the house, it was dark outside, and you kept to the shadows as you crept through the quiet streets toward Muggle London.

*******

  “Leicester Square? Really?” Sirius asked with a quirked eyebrow, you pushed him toward the door to an Italian restaurant.   “Yes, it’s busy and full of people. We’re not likely to come across anyone other than muggles having a Friday night out. Okay?” You chided as you waited for a muggle waiter to seat you at a table. Sirius squirmed uncomfortably at your side, Remus on the other smiled warmly down at you and placed a gentle hand on your back as you followed the waiter further into the restaurant. The restaurant was heaving with people, groups of friends laughed rowdily at circular tables whilst couples held hands and whispered to one another on smaller ones. You grinned at the normality of it all, you wondered what it must be like to have no knowledge of what was happening out there, of what you had lost.   “What would you like to drink, (Y/N)?” Remus asked as he passed a menu in your direction, you accepted it gladly and turned to the waiter who stood with a notepad and pen in his hand.   “Pinot Noir please lovely, bottle-one glass, thank you.” You said and with a fleeting look of judgement which you brushed off; the waiter wrote it down.   “Yourself, sir?” He asked as he leaned down to hear Sirius as he scoured the menu.   “Chablis.” Sirius answered curtly, you kicked him under the table and Sirius scowled. “Thank you.”   “Is that a bottle, sir?” The waiter asked, his look now nonplussed as he shifted his weight.   “Yes, thank you. Been a bitch of a day.” Sirius cleared his throat and offered you a pithy look. You shook your head and turned your attention back to the food on offer.   “Long Island Iced Tea for me please, sir.” Remus said cheerfully, the waiter looked surprised at Remus’ order and a flash of humour crossed his face. Remus blushed and averted his eyes as the waiter confirmed the order and with a wink in Remus’ direction left the table.   “You’ve made a friend, Moony.” Sirius wiggled his eyebrows as Remus blushed and sank into his chair.   “I didn’t know you were gay, Remus! That’s fantastic!” You said and Sirius erupted into laughter. You watched as the two men exchanged looks over the table. “Have I missed something?”   “No, (Y/N). Remus isn’t…gay. But you do like to dabble, don’t you Moony?” Sirius clasped his hands on the table and cocked his head to the side. Remus slammed his menu down and pointed his finger at Sirius.   “You’re one to talk. I’m sure I could tell (Y/N) some excellent stories about you and your exploits, Padfoot.” Remus snapped, Sirius threw his head back and let out one short laugh.   “I’ve done things that would make a whore blush, and unlike you, I have noting to hide.” Sirius said, his eyes sparkled in the dim light of the restaurant. You looked bewilderedly between the two men, this power play between the pair of them was delicious and strangely erotic. You could feel your own blush tickle your cheeks as Remus cast his eyes over you, his mouth a thin line on his usually soft face.   “I think you’re making (Y/N) uncomfortable, Sirius. This isn’t really appropriate dinner conversation, is it?” Remus retorted, Sirius cast a glance in your direction and seeing your red cheeks, smiled. He inched his hand closer to yours on the table, his fingertips barely touched yours and yet you felt like you had been struck by lightning. The corner of Sirius’ mouth twitched into a smirk; his moustache twirled perfectly at the sides accentuated it as his face was illuminated by the candlelight. Seconds later, Remus’ knee brushed against yours under the table and you felt the warmth of the contact inch up your thigh as the blush on your cheeks spread over your body.     “I can hold my own Remus, thank you.” You replied quietly, aware of how both men watched you as you fiddled with the menu. “I can hold my own.”   “I’m sure you can.” Sirius said under his breath. The tension continued to grow between the three of you, even when the waiter appeared with your drinks and took your food order, his keen attention fixed on Remus; Remus stared at you. His breathing was shallow, and you could see his knuckles were white as he balled his hand into a tight fist on the table. You couldn’t help but notice how dark his eyes looked as you passed his gaze over his face, the soft contours of his cheeks and the scars that had lived there for as long as you could remember. He had a sort of ethereal beauty about him that was impossible to deny, the gentle exterior and the darkness that was promised underneath by the swathes of battle marks across his flesh.

  You allowed Sirius to pour your wine and blushed again as he watched as you took a sip of the ruby liquid. You dabbed at the corner of your mouth with a finger and pressed it to you lips; the forgotten drop of claret soon mopped up with your tongue. You heard a sigh from Remus’ direction, your attention brought back to him. Sirius laughed again; his shoulder length hair tickled his face as he said:   “I think we shall have some sport tonight, brother.”

 ************

  You ate mostly in silence, only commenting on how delicious the food was- or, in Sirius’ case lamenting on the best way to eat a pizza as he attacked it with a knife and fork. When the plates were cleared, the wine flowed freely around the table. You had insisted Remus catch up and order a bottle for himself, and he in turn demanded that both you and Sirius have a cocktail to even up the score. Sirius ordered himself a Negroni whilst you opted for a Black Russian, you smiled at the two men began to relax into the evening. The sensual tension from earlier in the evening forgotten as through a fit of giggles you told Remus of the schoolgirl crush you harboured for him in your fifth year, he in his sixth.     “Honestly, it was pathetic. Poor Lily tried everything she could think of to get us alone together so I could tell you how I felt.” Your stomach hurt from laughing so much, the sides of your cheeks ached, and you were delighted by the delightful shade of pink Remus had turned.   “I’m telling you now, (Y/N). Moony only ever had eyes for one girl at school and she never looked twice at him!” Sirius laughed; he swirled the contents in his glass before he knocked back a big gulp.   “Oh, please tell me who it is, Remus. I need to know who I was losing out to.” You said through your laughter. Remus mumbled under his breath, so quiet it was impossible to hear him. “What? Sorry I missed that.” You grappled at Remus’ hands as he tried to cover his face. “Who was it, Remus? I promise I won’t laugh.” Remus looked from you to Sirius, if looks could kill, his friend would be dead in his Negroni before he knew it. He took a deep breath and covered his eyes.   “McGonagall” Remus whispered, Sirius slapped his knee in delight, and you couldn’t help the snort that escaped you as you thought of a poor, seventeen-year-old Remus hopelessly in love with the stern professor.   “Have a thing for authority, do you?” You asked playfully, Remus’ look darkened once more as he lowered his hands.   “Quite the opposite actually, (Y/N). I like the idea of those in power relinquishing it.” He said quietly, you felt as though everybody in the restaurant had disappeared as the only sound you could hear was the beating of your heart in your ears. You bit your lip and blinked, desperate to rid yourself of the warmth you suddenly felt between your legs.   “I just like fucking.” Sirius added after a moment, he considered what he said and then lolled his head to the side once again swept his gaze across your face. “A lot.”

  You didn’t know what to do with your hands as you regarded each of the men now staring intently at you.   “Shall we get the bill?” Sirius asked.   “Yep.” Remus answered instantly, his hand in the air as he tried to get the waiter’s attention. You grabbed for your purse and you each threw money onto the table; the muggle money was so fragile you thought. Especially the paper money, luckily Remus knew what-was-what and squared up with the waiter who looked disappointed to see Remus leaving. It was Sirius this time who placed his hand on the small of your back as you made your way out into the night, it was chilly now and you pulled your thin jacket around your chest.   “Where to now?” Remus asked, “Home? Or another drink?”   “I could have another drink…at home.” You said, you felt the warmth return between your legs and both men grinned at you. You slipped your hands into each of theirs, Sirius brought your hand up to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to your fingers. Remus brushed the back of your knuckles with his thumb, each action from the two men sent electric pulses through your veins.

*********

     “I’m telling you, (Y/N). If you had told Remus all the naughty things you wanted to do to him at school, he would have come immediately into his pants.” Sirius said as he poured port into three glasses and passed them around. You took a thoughtful sip, the richness of the port warmed you as you considered what to say next.   “Who says I wanted to do naughty things? The things I had in mind were wholly innocent, I’ll have you know.” You replied, you snuck a look at Remus from the corner of your eye; he seemed completely interested in his drink.   “Oh, I imagine they were, (Y/N). You were sweetness and light in school, weren’t you? Butter wouldn’t melt.” Sirius discarded his drink onto a nearby table and stood. He walked around his chair and placed his hands on the backrest, he leaned forward and squared his jaw. “I would have given anything to ruin you.” His gaze didn’t waver as a gentle moan left your lips; it was almost inaudible, but Remus’ head snapped up in your direction. You parted your lips and ran your tongue along them, they felt painfully dry.   “Sirius, you’ve had too much to drink mate.” He said, Sirius merely shrugged.   “In Vino Veritas, brother. You telling me that you wouldn’t have absolutely fucked her senseless if she told you she wanted you?” Sirius countered. Remus ran a hand through his hair as he took a swig of his port.   “I am still here.” You offered weakly. Sirius sneered at you as he picked his tumbler up and swirled it around again.   “I know, witch. I want you to hear.” Sirius said darkly Remus groaned in his chair, he shifted uncomfortably. “Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it, Moony. Me and you, her hot little body to keep us warm.” You moaned again; it was involuntary this time. Both men looked in your direction as you rubbed your thighs together, desperate to relieve the throb between your legs. Sirius chuckled ominously as he offered his hand to Remus. Begrudgingly, Remus took it. Your heart thundered in your chest; you bit the inside of your cheek; surely you were dreaming? You would wake up any second now, a damp patch in your knickers and a desperate aching in your quim. Sirius rolled the sleeves of his smart white shirt up to his elbows; he crossed the room in an instant. He knelt in front of you, his hands on your knees. You could do nothing but stare into the face of this man you had known in some capacity since you were eleven, as he moved up your body, his mouth close to your ear; his hair tickled your cheek.   “Would you like that, (Y/N)? Would you like to lie between Remus and me? To be utterly filled to the brim?” You could feel his hot breath on your ear, you rolled your head back and sighed. Your eyes fluttered closed and Sirius’ lips grazed your earlobe, you clutched the arms of the chair tightly. “Just say the word, (Y/N). Just tell us you want us-”   “You don’t have to, (Y/N). Don’t feel pressured-” Remus interjected, you stopped him short with an extended hand. You reached for him; his eyes darkened as he took your hand. You looked up earnestly into his face, the face that had littered your dreams for a solid nine months as a teenager. You smiled wryly at Remus whilst Sirius held his breath, still by your ear.   “I want you.” You whispered, “Both of you.”

  Sirius pulled you out of the chair and pushed you toward Remus, his arms extended to catch you. You placed your hands either side of Remus’ face and inched your lips closer to his, Remus closed the gap with a growl. He kissed you hungrily, it was furious, and you slid your hands into his hair and tugged. Remus groaned against your lips as your hands moved readily in his hair. You felt a tug behind you as Sirius turned you in Remus’ arms brought your mouth to his. You couldn’t decipher whose hands were where; as you felt your shirt being tugged over your head, and hands working at the belt of your jeans. You felt them being pushed down your thighs as you were turned once again to face Remus. There was a pair of hands on your breasts, roughly needing them through the thin lace of your bra whilst a hand graced over your stomach and one plunged into your knickers.   “So wet already. Can you smell her, Moony?” Sirius grunted against your neck, his teeth grazed along the sensitive skin and he sucked hard. Remus only moaned in response, he bit down on your lower lip and you shuddered under him. Sirius moved his fingers deftly over your clit, he rubbed it gently and your head rolled back onto Sirius’ shoulder. “Make yourself useful, (Y/N). Why don’t you play with Remus’ big cock?” You didn’t need to be told twice, Remus’ lips pulled back into a snarl as you made fast work of his belt and pushed his trousers down to his knees. He was hard as you pulled him out of his boxers, he hissed as the air touched his member. You worked your hand up and down Remus’ shaft to the same pace that Sirius rubbed your clit. Remus pulled your head forward by your neck and crushed his lips to yours. Another moan slipped from your lips as Sirius parted your slick folds and pushed two fingers inside you, your grip around Remus tightened as he bucked his hips against your hand. Sirius quickened his pace, and your legs began to tremble as you began to move your hips against Sirius’ hand, fucking yourself on his fingers. You pumped Remus faster as a slew of curses fell from his lips. Sirius grabbed a fistful of your hair and pulled your head back roughly. You yelped in surprise but found your scalp burned pleasantly with the pain.

  “I want you to come on my fingers, witch. Do you think you can do that?” You nodded helplessly as his thumb began to rub you as his fingers plunged in and out of your sex. Remus pulled away from you, your hand now empty of him, you brought it up to tangle in Sirius’ hair.   “Fuck (Y/N), you have no idea how delicious you look now.” Remus whispered; he attacked your neck with wet kisses as Sirius brought you to orgasm. It flooded through you in powerful waves, your moans silenced by Sirius’ hand around your mouth.   “Quiet. I want to hear your pretty noises, but not here.” Sirius instructed. As you came down from your high, you saw Remus nod to Sirius as they both grasped one of your hands. With a distinct pop you arrived in your Grimmauld Place bedroom, before you had the chance to adjust after the apparation, you were flung backwards onto your bed. You watched with half lidded eyes as Sirius and Remus both undressed fully, you could see clearly now just how well-endowed the pair of them were. Remus was bigger than Sirius, but Sirius was girthier. You licked your lips in delight, you couldn’t believe this was happening. Both of these attractive men lavishing attention on you, it was almost too much to bear. Remus climbed onto the bed; his arms open to you.   “Sit on my face.” He commanded, you did so without hesitating. You hoisted a leg over either side of his head and lowered yourself gently down, his lips were gentle against your throbbing pussy, still recovering from your previous orgasm. Sirius appeared next to you, his hand slid down your back and gave your arse a smack, causing you to jolt forward. Remus grasped hold of your hips and held you in place, his tongue probing at your slippery entrance. It felt divine, Remus knew exactly what he was doing and as he kissed and nibbled at you, he began to shake his head from side to side. The feeling of his tongue rounding delicious laps around your clit was earthshattering, you had never felt anything as intense as this before. You were coming again in seconds; and you threw your head back and ground yourself against Remus’ face. You could hear Sirius laugh as Remus lapped at your core, you shuddered against him and whimpered at the overstimulation. Sirius grasped your hand roughly and placed it on his cock which throbbed impatiently. You moved your hand to the top around his foreskin and pulled back, Sirius smile illuminated the room as he moved your hair to the side.   “No love, use your mouth.” He whispered, you slid awkwardly from Remus’ face and crawled before Sirius. You looked up into his dark face as he regarded you, he watched as you ran your tongue from the bottom of his shaft to the top. He sighed and placed a delicate hand to the top of your head, pushing it downwards. You didn’t mind, in fact, you thoroughly enjoyed it. The feeling of the decision being removed from your hands was delectable in a life such as yours, where at any second you could die from making the wrong choice.

  It took you a second to adjust to Sirius’ girth as he began to fuck your throat, slowly at first and after you gave him a swift nod; he picked up his pace. You gagged around his cock as Sirius pushed it further into your throat, you had to swallow; or you thought you might choke. Saliva dripped from your chin as with great effort, you swallowed around his cock. Sirius let out a groan and grabbed a fistful of your hair.   “Do that again.” He commanded, you instantly swallowed around him. He quivered and thrusted into your mouth with more force, you whined around him as with each time he hit the base of your throat, he pulled out almost as far. You mourned the loss of him in your mouth each time. He tasted salty with sweat, and you found that the most delicious thing you had tasted all evening.

  Your jaw began to ache and though you did your best to ignore it, Sirius seemed to sense your discomfort. He pulled out of your mouth with a satisfying pop.   “I want to come inside you, (Y/N). I want to make you come all over my cock.” Sirius breathed into your ear, he still held fast onto the fistful of your hair. You moaned against his lips as he brought you roughly in for a kiss. “Feeling neglected, Remus?” Sirius laughed as he surfaced for air. You looked over your shoulder to see Remus on his back, he stroked his cock lazily as he watched you.   “On the contrary, just enjoying the show.”  

You were breathless, positively alight with desire. Every inch of your flesh screamed with want and for a second you felt guilty, wanton almost. Every scrap of decorum you previously possessed ebbed from your body with each illicit moan, and every time you passed yourself between these two men you couldn’t help the grin that formed on your face. The lascivious acts you had both endured and performed were more than you could ever ask for from one partner let alone two. The bottom line though, you felt, was if it was wrong or if it you weren’t meant to enjoy it…why were you enjoying it so?   “Come here, darling.” Remus said softly, as if able to hear your thoughts. He held his arms out to you and you crawled into his embrace gladly. He pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head and his hands travelled down your back to your rump, he squeezed it and gave it a playful tap. You smiled widely at him and kissed him deeply, your hands found themselves again in his hair and his mouth trailed hot kisses from your mouth along your jaw. Sighs of contentedness fell readily from your lips as Sirius approached from behind you. He brushed his hand softly up your arm causing your flesh to tingle under his touch. You heard Sirius whisper a spell and with a start you were thrown onto your back, propped up on the pillows; your legs brought up spread wide and bent at the knee. You felt soft fabric wrap around your wrists and the backs of your thighs as your arms and legs were bound together, leaving you bare, open and vulnerable to both men. Another soft piece of fabric settled over your eyes, completely covering your vision, and leaving you without sight. A fleeting moment of zealous insecurity bounded through your mind; you had never tried anything as adventurous as this with any of your previous partners. There hadn’t been many, mind you- but still you felt a little out of your depth. What flashed through your mind next was Remus’ kind face, you knew he would never let anything happen to you. You knew you need only say the word if you were uncomfortable and there would be no hard feelings. He would probably make you a cup of tea and talk about something innocuous until you felt better. And there was Sirius, who earlier on had felt so incensed over what had happened to Marlene that he was willing to put himself in danger- yes, you knew you were in safe hands.

  “How does that feel, (Y/N)?” Sirius asked from a way away. You pulled against your bonds slightly, you couldn’t escape them, but they weren’t painful.   “Indescribable.” You breathed. You smiled, unaware if either of them could see your face. You felt a soft caress of your inner thigh, your breath hitched in response. Your cunt ached with need, regardless of the two orgasms you’d already had by Sirius’ quick fingers and Remus’ clever tongue.   “We’re going to play a game, aren’t we Remus?” Sirius said jovially, as if he were speaking of Quidditch in the sun.   “Oh, yes. I love this game.” Remus replied from elsewhere in the room. You would have liked to think that your hearing would have been heightened by having your sight stripped from you; but you wondered whether the disorientation you felt as the two men moved around you was part of the game.   “We’re going to fuck you now, (Y/N). One after the other. You are to guess who is fucking you.” Sirius said. You felt a hand tug on the restraints around your knees and a hum of satisfaction.   “You are not allowed to come unless you guess correctly.” Remus added somewhat cruelly. You frowned and felt another hand caress your breast, they took your nipple in between their fingers and gave it a tug. You yelped with surprise and tried to lurch upwards, but a hand against your chest pushed you down again. Where the fingers were on your nipple a second ago, you felt a tongue trace around the stiffened teat. They sucked hard and you bucked your hips upward, desperate for something, anything to ease the throbbing you felt in your quim. You were wracked with worry though, what would happen if you couldn’t tell them apart?   “Our girl’s needy, wouldn’t you say Sirius?” Remus said, oh, it was Remus who suckled on your breast. You felt his hot breath on you as he pressed wet kisses across the valley of your breasts and then lavished the other nipple with the same delicious torture.

  You needed to come. You needed release desperately. You bucked your hips upwards again and a whimper escaped you. Fruitless.   “Please.” You whispered blindly; you didn’t know if they were even listening to you. “Please fuck me.”   “Who?” A voice answered quietly, you weren’t sure who answered you, you bit your lip.   “Anyone, both of you. Please, I need, I need-”   “Look at us Moony, two dogs with a little bitch all tied up and begging.” Sirius said, you had no idea where he was. He seemed to be everywhere and nowhere at once. Like his voice filled all of your senses and yet left you achingly touch starved. “Isn’t that something?”   “Yes, the irony isn’t lost on me.” Remus replied, he too seemed to float in the ether around you. Like a voice from a dream, almost tangible. You began to struggle against your restraints, it was torture. You wanted nothing more than to be fucked by these two men and the longer they made you wait, the more restless you became.   “(Y/N), are you ready?” You nodded as definitely as you could, you braced yourself for what, you couldn’t say. Another agonizing minute passed before you heard any movement. You could feel the heat from a body between your legs, it was impossible to say who it was as they leaned forward to press their member between your slick folds. Whomever it was pushed into gently, you squealed as they filled you torturously slowly. You moved your hips against him, desperate for the friction. When they didn’t move you let out a grunt of frustration. You heard him chuckle, whoever he was, and he gave the smallest thrust into you.   “Please-” You mustered, your voice was small and full of want. You wished you could take this person in your arms and fuck him, but with your arms and legs bound together, all you could do was lift your hips. He was big, bigger than anything you’d had before. You felt the sting as he stretched you out with each miniscule thrust. You felt fit to burst, like you could explode at any second if you weren’t fucked and fucked well. You writhed beneath him, impatient and desperate.

  You weren’t prepared for what happened next. Your mouth was forcefully opened, and a cock slid inside. Whoever wasn’t buried in your cunt took your mouth. Incredible. You spluttered against it, as the cock inside your quim began to move. You moaned throatily as you were utterly filled. The cock inside you began to push furiously into you, bruising your cervix with every delectable thrust. It was almost manic now; you were being tossed around something chronic and with every thrust from inside you caused the cock in your mouth to be pushed further into your throat. You wanted to badly to feel them around you, you wished to lavish your lovers with touches of encouragement.   “Fuck.” That was definitely Sirius. But you couldn’t work out where. Dear Merlin, you needed to come. Please, you begged to anybody that might listen, please. You hollowed your cheeks against the member in your throat and tried to suck, but the force in which they fucked your mouth let you do nothing but try and keep your teeth out of the way.   “Fuck, fuck.” That was Remus. His voice seemed to be closer than Sirius. You moaned again, as the man between your legs lifted a hand and began to rub your clit. That was it, you were going to come. The man between your legs fucked you harder as if he could sense this, the room was a cacophony of moans, of delicious skin on skin and you could almost float away in the bliss. You felt your orgasm begin to reach its peak, but that wasn’t allowed was it? Nobody had asked you to guess? You decided not to bring it up, but to reach the climax you so desperately craved.

  The thrusting into your core was desperate now, incensed. You could hear the cries of a man about to spill his seed. The man in your mouth pulled out and you clamped your aching jaw closed immediately. You felt hands around your throat and pressure as your moans became heightened, matching the orgasm that now sizzled through you.   “Oh...Lord!” The man between your legs came, you could feel it. “Fuck, I’m coming.” That was Sirius, you were sure of it. A slew of curses whispered in the distance and you could feel his thrusts become weaker as he filled you full of him.   “Sirius.” You whispered with a smile.   “It’s a bit late for that you naughty slut.” Sirius snapped, in an instant the ties around your arms and legs vanished and they fell to the bed with a thud. They ached, you ached. You had never been fucked that hard and you groaned as you rolled onto your stomach. You were pulled up sharply by your hips and onto all fours. You craned your neck round to see Remus behind you, red faced and sweaty as he lined himself up with your entrance. You noticed his chest was littered with scars and you wanted to run your tongue along each one.   “Need to come.” Remus muttered as he pushed into you roughly. It was like night and day to the way Sirius had fucked you, Remus pulled a fistful of your hair and yanked your head back sharply. He wasted no time in building a rhythm, he rutted into you mercilessly. You cried out, the pain in your scalp along with the pleasure in your loins was almost too much for you to bear.   “God Moony, I’m hard again just watching you fuck her.” Sirius said, his voice was strained as your eyes met. He was perched against the pillows, his back to the headboard as he stroked his now hard cock. His eyes were dark, and he licked his lips as he watched his best friend pound into you from behind. Remus let go of your hair and brought his hands to your hips in a vice like grip. He pushed and pulled you onto his cock, you could feel the wetness you had created trickle down your thighs.

  Your voice was hoarse as you came for the fourth time, you had cried and moaned and whimpered for what felt like hours. You felt tears sting your eyes as the pleasure trundled through your veins, your walls tightened, and Remus gave a great cry before he thrust into twice more and you milked him of his orgasm. He fell forward onto you and you went with him, falling onto Sirius’ chest with a grunt. Sirius wrapped his arms steadily around you and bundled you close to his chest. Remus pressed a tender kiss to your shoulder as he slid from on top of you and pulled you in between them, Sirius on the right, Remus on the left. You breathed. From the bottom of your lungs you gasped in great breaths. Sirius’ fingers travelled from your neck to the base of your spine and back again, and Remus stroked lazy circles on your stomach. You hummed contentedly as your heartrate returned to normal, you nestled your head into Sirius’ chest and wiggled your hips against Remus earning a laugh from the latter.   “Comfortable (Y/N)?” Remus asked into your hair. You hummed in agreement and let your eyes close.   “Well our game didn’t go much to plan, did it Moony?” Sirius asked, you could hear the smile in his voice. Remus’ chuckle vibrated against your back.   “No, not quite. Someone obviously didn’t understand the rules.” Remus said, he tapped your stomach playfully and you groaned.   “I understood perfectly, thank you very much. I just couldn’t hold on much longer. I was desperate.” You sighed and Sirius placed a kiss to the top of your head.   “You’ll have to do better. We won’t be as lenient next time.” Sirius stated. Your eyes fluttered open and gazed up at Sirius face, he was joking, surely?   “We certainly will not.” Remus confirmed from behind you, you felt your stomach leap in excitement.   “Next time?” You murmured; this couldn’t be happening. No, not to you. Remus rolled you in his arms, so you faced him, Sirius shuffled down the bed slightly and wrapped his arm around your middle.   “You think I’m going to go the rest of my life without ever fucking you again?” Remus questioned; his brow furrowed but you could tell he was being sincere. You pressed your finger to the scar that ran across the bridge of his nose and traced it lightly, he closed his eyes against your touch and pressed a kiss to the palm of your hand.

  You were still. The three of you. You must have fallen asleep; you have no idea when or how long for; but Sirius stirred behind you and your eyes opened wearily.   “(Y/N),” he whispered, “Rem. Come on, we need to bathe.” You lifted your head from Remus’ arm and yawned, your bodies were stuck together with sweat and who knows what else. Remus groaned and pulled you closer to him. Sirius bent to kiss your cheek and shifted to the side of the bed. “Shall I run you a bath, (Y/N)? I imagine you’re very sore.”   ��Yes please, I’m broken.” You joked and shot a wink in his direction. You yawned again. “Do you fancy a coffee?”   “I’ll put the kettle on.” Sirius said as he pulled his discarded boxers on over his manhood, he flicked the light on as he exited the room. You turned your attention back to Remus who looked so peaceful, you felt guilty disturbing him. You placed a tender kiss to his lips, and he smiled.   “Come on, we need to get up. We absolutely stink.” You said softly, Remus only pouted and pulled you even closer.   “Don’t want to.” He replied stubbornly. You laughed and pushed his arms from around you. You rubbed your eyes and trailed your hands over your neck and chest, the skin there tender. “(Y/N), can I ask you something?” Remus said, he had propped himself up onto his elbow as he watched you.   “Of course.”   “Why didn’t you ask me out when we were in school?” He asked you quizzically, you groaned and flopped backwards onto the bed. He inched closer to you and placed a hand on the side of your face, turning it to him. His green eyes intently fixed on yours.   “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I was scared you would say no. My little fifteen-year-old heart couldn’t have taken it.” You replied with a chuckle.   “I wish you had.” He paused thoughtfully; he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “I would’ve said yes.”   “Really?” You pondered, he hummed and pressed a lingering kiss to your lips and suddenly, he was gone. You opened your eyes to find him at the other end of the room pulling his boxers on.   “I still might.” Remus winked, he left your bedroom with a yawn and closed the door.

  You sighed and rubbed your eyes. It was all too much, but the butterflies in your stomach reminded you that even in the midst of the horrors of this war there was still happiness to be had. Even if it came in the shape of two very unlikely men. You couldn’t believe your luck, how much it had changed.

[utterlyinevitable]

The Conference (Part 9)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 

Paring: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Rebecca Lao) Word Count: 3.7k Rating: T+ Warning: Some cursing Summary: It’s the evening after the keynote and they go out for a civil dinner date.

A/N: shout out to ruby @starrystarrytrouble for reminding me people actually like reading this mess 💕

________________________________________

After we finished up the panel I stuck around the conference hall to network whilst Ethan had ditched the crowd at the first opportunity he got, heading back to our hotel room and venturing away from the pecking vultures. To be honest, I didn’t really blame him. Everyone wanted a piece of the poor, well-endowed man. 

A couple hours later, I shuffled back into our apartment. My aching feet somehow prevailed without causing me to collapse on the odd geometric carpet floor, or ditching my heels along the way and walking barefoot like some uncultured frosh stumbling home at 3AM. Once through the heavy metal plated door, I headed straight to my room, not throwing a single pleasantry towards Ethan in the seating area. From what I could tell he was typing furiously on his laptop after nursing a scotch - the empty crystal tumbler on the table was a dead giveaway. 

The anxiety and delirium inducing stress of the day lifted the second my kinda-sweaty body collapsed onto the private armchair in my room, clutching its aqua-colored arms and sinking into the velvet cushion. Staring out at the familiar skyline my mind started to replay the happenings of the day; every little thing that happened - from the confidence I felt during our speech, to the way that asshole called me out, and how Ethan stood up for me every step of the way. How proud he was even if he relayed the sentiment in such small words. 

We survived today. We haven’t strangled each other nor suffered any little deaths. All that’s left for this trip is the tour we have tomorrow morning, and then we’ll be on our way back to Edenbrook. Back to the way things were… 

Somehow my tired and self destructive brain decided it wanted to revel in the memories of the last few days. Thinking about all the non-work things that happened this trip. Thinking of all the words shared, and the blast from the past. And the revelation that little adventure birthed. 

Fuck me...

Things are weird. Like, so weird. I don’t know what I’m doing or why I’m even thinking this… but I miss him. Today showed me how great we are together! Professionally and as friends. We’re the dynamic duo: Ramsey and his Rookie. His. I - 

I need to stop thinking that. 

I belong to myself. I do what I want when I want and with whom I want. 

And so does he. And that’s why I walked away. I’m- 

I’m still getting over him. 

While simultaneously trying to get under him… 

Thoughts wandered back to Ryan and how long it took me to get over the detrimental ‘what if’s of him. If I held on tighter and longer and didn’t get in the way of myself back then - if one thing was different - everything could be different. 

A small, revelatory gasp escaped me. 

I didn’t want things to be different. 

After eight fucking years I finally understood. 

If I didn’t love and lose Ryan I never would have found my way to Boston. To Ethan. And here - knowing what I do and having all the experiences of the last few months - I couldn’t continue a life without knowing Ethan Ramsey. 

I’m going to do whatever I can to repair our friendship. 

I changed my clothes into something not requiring heels - black skinny jeans, a blouse and my trusty Chelsea boots - and my hair pulled back into a bun. Simple, sleek, and completely me. No pomp and circumstance, or hiding behind anything. Just me, making an effort.  

With all the determination I could muster I sauntered into the living room where I assumed Ethan would still be. 

I was right; he hadn’t changed positions at all. Sitting there on the couch, his feet up on the gaudy footstool with his laptop perched on his lap, tortoise-patterned glasses framing his face, and furiously typing on the keyboard. 

“So...” I trailed awkwardly to break the tension surrounding him, leaning against the wall with my hands stuffed in my armpits. “What do you want to do for dinner?” 

“Oh,” He planted his feet on the floor and turned to face me fully, moving his laptop off of him and folding his arms in his lap. “Uh, well-”

Quickly I added, “If you’d rather eat alone it’s fine by me. I was thinking of grabbing pizza at John’s.” 

Ethan nodded in response, saying, “Sounds good.”

“Cool,” I nodded back. “You ready or…?”

“Let me grab my things,” he stood, collected his things and headed to his room.

Less than two minutes later we headed out of the apartment together, walking side by side. Though this time wasn’t like earlier. There wasn’t the blind determination and need to impress like this morning. Right now we were two people who used to know one another going out to dinner in a spectacular converted synagogue.  

***

For anyone who doesn’t know John’s, it’s a local family-style pizza joint. There’s three restaurants around the city and the Times Square location is by far the best. Every time I have a hot minute to spare I try to go - the stained glass and craftsmanship of the building is everything! But you don’t want to hear about that… and neither did Ethan when I tried to fill the silence during our walk with all the reasons to love this place. For some reason he preferred to barge and weave in silence. 

Whatever. 

Lucky enough he was more chatty once we were seated. 

Our table was in the mezzanine with not much of a view besides the stone staircase in the corner and the large dome towering above. The dim lighting complimented the deep wooden table and beige upholstered seating. 

We ordered. And without the menu to keep our attention, I tried my hand at conversation once more.  

“Be honest, how did we do?”

Looking me in the eyes, ones that mirrored mine, showed such confidence and pride as he said his next words;

“You handled it well, Becca.” There was a tug at the corners of his mouth that pulled at my own. I was about to get a rare Ramsey smile - one I’ve been devoid of for far too long. 

“Dare I even say, like a natural.” 

I got to revel in the small compliment for a few moments as the server brought over our food - garlic knots, small veggie pizza, and a chef’s side salad. 

“I didn’t stutter too much or come off too young?” I couldn’t help but ask when it was just us two again. His opinion matters more than anyone else’s when it comes to my career. 

“You did.” 

“But you -” 

He cut me off, a slight shake of his big head, “You are young and this was your first keynote.” he clarified. And once more he said pridefully, “You did well.” 

After what felt like ages we shared a private smile. How he was able to bring me back into myself with a few words and stop fussing over imposter syndrome is a wonder.  

“Now eat some pizza and be happy.” 

My smile grew to a goofy one by the way he was looking at me, bemused. I refrained from sticking my tongue out and dug into a little slice of heaven. “Don’t have to tell me twice.”

We dug in. Letting the flavors dance over my taste buds and make me only as happy as a New York slice could make me. No amount of fantastic sex could compare to pizza. Everything kind of disappeared - time stopped while the first bites settled in my tummy. Even Ethan looked to be enjoying it even though it’s not fancy smancy and artery clogging. 

Eventually I broke our companioned silence;

“How was lunch with Chief Fredericks?” I asked as I reached for a scrumptious ball of garlicy dough. 

The response left his lips so swiftly he didn’t even bother to look up from his plate; 

“Informative.”

I scoffed at the non-answer answer. 

My little grumble pulled him out of his bubble and he looked over at me - those damn baby blues challenging my thoughtfully indecent outburst. I just gave him a look right back. 

Ethan rolled his eyes and reached for another slice. Cutting it up with a fork and knife like an absolute weirdo.  

“He heard about the state budget cuts. Wanted to know what I think and if I’d be open to consult every so often.” 

“And?” I probed. 

“And what? You know how I feel about the future of Edenbrook.” 

“Yes. But if it goes under, what do you think you’ll do? I mean, everyone’s going to be throwing themselves at you.” 

I shoved some greenery in my gob to keep from adding the jarring truth. 

Everyone throws themselves at you. 

But who he gives his attention to is another story.  

Ethan shrugged ever so nonchalantly, “I haven’t thought about it.” 

The cavalier way he was speaking of his life after Edenbrook had thrown me off. Ethan was never this laid-back. It just wasn’t in his nature. There’s always something for this man to stress over. And Edenbrook’s closing should be his anxiety numero uno. 

But here he was, ever so calm. 

Hmm... 

“Are you in denial?” I said through a bite, fully anticipating another non-answer.  

“Maybe.” 

The way he said it took me aback. It was inherently honest and soft. All of his jagged features were rounded and there was a dulled little twinkle in his eye. 

Yeah, something’s going on here he’s not telling me.  

“Ethan -” 

And of course he deflects by turning the conversation on me; “What are you going to do?” 

Keeping from rolling my eyes at his obvious deflection from roaming into his feelings deeper, I replied, “Transfer my residency.” 

“Where?” 

“I…” - dammit - “don’t know.”

I haven’t really dwelled on what happens when the hospital closes. Obviously I need to finish residency if I want to be an actual practicing doctor. But the matching process can go screw itself. I don’t never ever want to do that again - all I cared about was matching with the best. And I did. So who’s the second best now? 

Is it wherever he goes?  

There’s just so much to think about, and I’d really rather not. Not until the last few nails are lined up against the coffin. 

“See,” he said with a hint of a lopsided grin, “Neither of us are ready to leave Edenbrook behind.” 

He was right. Of course he’s right. You didn’t need to be a diagnostician or even a doctor to see that we’re holding out hope of a buyout. 

I’ve just gotten to Edenbrook - only a few months into my dream career with my dream boss - and now, what? It’s all over before it even really began? No. I can’t accept that. 

There was a beat of silence as we both reached for the salad tongs, our hands brushing on accident. Both our eyes shot to bear witness to the contact, pulling us out of whatever ran wild through our thoughts and into this new, secluded moment. Everything around us dulled in the distance; the sounds swirling in the air muted and like a faint breeze. The warm lighting dimmed further, yet there was a spotlight on the salad bowl. The greens and reds and purples of the ruffage illuminated like it was the only thing that mattered. Like right now the earth was spinning just for this moment of closeness. 

Surprisingly, neither of us made a motion to move. His large hand overlapping my dainty fingers, the metal underneath the pads of my fingers warming up instantly. Electricity still coursed through me like the very first time. Except now it carried the memories of all the other times and places he set me aflame. 

I had to be the one to pull back. 

Almost, like it needed time to comprehend why the moment was intentionally ruined, the atmosphere around us began to revert back slightly. I could hear the idle chatter of those around us now. I could see the full picture of Ethan sitting across from me and all the individuals pattering around behind him. What couldn’t pretend to go back and hung off kilter was the beating in my chest - I could feel the electricity coursing through my veins and putting my heart through the ringer. 

Ethan made up for it by serving me. 

Does he know he still has such an effect on me?  

Quick! I needed to divert my thoughts off of the creeping flush and want from taking hold. So I went back to talking about work, our safe topic. 

“If you could work anywhere else in the world where would it be?” I asked.  

Ethan took a moment to think as he served himself some salad. He looked like he was actually thinking of an answer, maybe, for the first time he’s digested the hospital’s fate. 

“I think the next logical step would be the Mayo Clinic. They’re the best diagnostics in the world.” His eyes diverted back down to his plate and, after a beat, he added, “I also wouldn’t mind spending more time on missions with The WHO.”

My eyes searched his as they looked anywhere but where I was seated across from him, trying to find any sort of fault in his features. Something, anything, that I could hold onto. Nothing. Just stupid sincerity. The first fucking time in weeks he actually lets us talk about his time in the Amazon I can’t be mad at him.  

“You really enjoyed your time there, huh?” 

“It…” he hesitated, choosing his words carefully. 

We’ve wandered into emotional territory and we both needed to tread carefully. I need to remember that he was never mine, as much as I felt like his from our first kiss. Need to recall that back then everything was drawn out in plain sight. Our end was always just that - an end. I Need to forgive. And try to remember that at one point he did try to fight for me, in his round-a-bout noncommittal way, and I was the one to end things officially. 

We both need to forgive. Especially if these are the last few months we have working together. 

“Was important work and I got to make a difference in the lives of thousands of indigenous people.” Ethan took another small pause for breath. When he continued, his deep baritone voice was lower, “Even if my intentions for going were skewed, it was an opportunity of a lifetime.” 

The simplest thing to do would be to nod, or eat - distract myself - or even change the subject. To try not to dwell on the implications of the statement. But I couldn’t. My body tensed and the warmth from moments before fled completely. 

We were silent. The brutal truth of why he left stinging just as much as it did the day I found out. 

Minutes, many many minutes passed with me finding solace in sweet savory carbs and Ethan pushing things around on his plate. 

Eager to change the subject there was one other topic of the day I was endlessly curious to know more about; 

“So, what’s the deal with Dr. Schwab?” 

“Don’t.” He dismissed, his authoritative voice seeping through just a tad. Though I’d like to think he’s smart enough not to use it with me outside of Edenbrook.  

“If you don’t tell me I’ll be forced to fabricate my own. I’m feeling a one-night stand gone wrong.” 

He looked back down at his food. 

“Oh my god, I’m right.” The smile that erupted literally took over my entire face. I could not hide it even if I tried.  

“Rebecca,” he tried to scold. 

“Now you have to tell me.” 

Just like earlier he turned the conversation back on me; “What’s with the frat boy?” 

“Ryan was never in a fraternity,” I responded, not hiding the grin that formed by putting Ethan in his place. “He’s a jock though.” 

He expelled a dry laugh, “I don’t think that’s any better.” He took a bite of his salad. Something radiated off of Ethan I couldn’t quite place. 

“We were close in high school,” I added for reasons I’m not quite sure why. Like that explained who Ryan was and why he came back into my life now, of all times.  

Ethan made a condescending, “mhm”. 

I rolled my eyes; “We had a thing for a while, okay.” I conceded. “We grew apart senior year, and then I went off to college. Last night was the first time we’ve spoken in, like, eight years.” 

Ethan made absolutely no reactions to the statement. Not even a stupid wiggle of his dumb perfect eyebrow. 

Is he even paying attention? 

“Now tell me about Schwab - sorry, Hilary,” I coaxed.  

Ethan’s hand flew to the bridge of his nose and up to carefully rub his eyes. 

This has gotta be good. 

I waited patiently and eagerly for this story. She couldn’t have been Ethan’s type and yet… What happened!? 

Eyes still shut tight, he grumbled, “What’s there to tell?” 

“Obviously something happened,” I couldn’t help but mock, “You slept together!” 

“Yes, and it’s something I do not like to dwell on.” 

“Sorry, buddy, but it looks like she does.” 

He groaned. Then shifted in his chair. Ethan took a long drag of his drink. And just when I figured he was going to wait this out until one of us changed the subject, he spoke; 

“A moment of weakness a few years back. And she was…” 

Ah! It’s actually happening! Ethan’s telling a salacious story! 

Shifting in my seat and placing my head in my hands to give him my full attention; My brows and smile grew as I finished the sentence for him, “Eager?” 

He scowled. 

“Jesus Christ, Ethan, just tell me what happened!” 

“I will not go into details.” 

“Fine.” I made a motion with my hand for him to continue without the juicy details. 

“Harper and I had just ended things for good not long before…” 

We ended up going back and forth for a while - Ethan not wanting to give anything up and me pulling as much as I could out of him. Long story short, Ethan was in a weird mental state after breaking up with Harper for the hundredth and final time in their six year relationship. He took up a conference opportunity to get away for two nights. Knowing how much he loves people, Ethan spent most of his time drowning his senses at the hotel bar. And low and behold, enter Hillary. 

From the sounds of it she was agreeable and very very forward. And Ethan was so lost in liquor that her voice didn’t irritate him as much as it did the next morning, and every single time they were in close proximity thereafter. Hillary had been going through a separation with her husband and needed a distraction just as bad. Really, who could blame her? Toting Ethan around would be the best revenge. 

The first night of his stay was fine - apparently the sex was satisfactory and she didn’t do anything remarkably memorable. Or so he says. I still think she looks like a squawker. He didn’t linger around long after before retreating to his hotel room. Then the next afternoon he was bored and weak and agreed to lunch. And lunch turned into drinks which turned into round two. In his room. And she didn’t leave. She wasn’t leaving. So Ethan bought an earlier plane ticket, and shook her awake before checking out. 

And every conference since she seems to want to entertain a rematch. 

“Oh my god, you’re horrible!” I exclaimed ever delightfully. This was hilarious! 

“I shouldn’t really be surprised. You flew to another continent after we slept together.” Shaking my head, a stupid little smirk on my lips I asked, “Have you ever had a one night stand before?” 

“Wha - of course I have!” 

“One’s that didn’t end up with you getting on a plane?” 

He leaned back and folded his arms across his chest. “If you must know, I’ve had my fair share in undergrad.” 

Now it was my turn to send a condescending “mhm” his way. 

We spoke longer and polished off our plates - not a single crumb remained. This was nice. Really nice getting to be close to him again and just being friends. Telling stories and exchanging playful jabs here and there. It’s how I fell for the idiot in the first place. 

Baby steps.     

-

Two hours after we arrived the server came over with the bill. 

She was friendly and lovely the whole meal. The best part about her style of service is that she let us just exist and didn’t check up all that often. When she did I could tell she overheard someone of the crap Ethan and I were spewing. She had one of those knowing smiles, like she was in on our jokes the entire time. 

“Can I just say, you guys are adorable,” she relayed with the brightest of smiles after setting the padfolio on the table, her hands clapping together excitedly. She looked like a child who had just met Santa Claus for the first time. 

L O L she thinks we’re together.  

At that I actually laughed out loud before informing, “We’re colleagues. In town for a conference.” 

The horror on the girl's face said it all. 

“Oh! My mistake, sorry. I can split the bill for you.” She reached for the pad where it sat in front of Ethan. 

He grabbed the black leather at the same time I spoke;  

"Nope, dinner’s on him.” I cupped a hand over my mouth and pointed a not-at-all discreet thumb towards him, “He'll get reimbursed," I laughed more to myself than anything. 

She smiles, a little relieved by my warmth, then turns to look at Ethan - silently asking permission or if it’s okay that he pays. Generally looking for some sort of direction from the old man.    

He shoots the server a look. Then forks over his credit card. 

As she saunters off, I smile at him sweetly, “Thank you.” 

Of course he rolls his eyes. But that rise in the corners of his mouth says so much more. 

________________________________________

A/N: sorry it’s shit. thank you for sticking with this series 💕 we’ve just got one chapter left! 

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[zevranunderstander]

people who say "you eat / you don't eat x??? what is wrong with you??" are sooo annoying. like. one of my best friends likes pizza with pineapple on it. he also eats his pizza with fork & knife. WHENEVER we eat pizza with someone who hasn't eaten pizza with him before they INEVITABLY point both of these things out like they are scandalized to death. im not shitting when im saying i heard this dialogue +10 times by now.

whenever i say i dont like nutella people do the whole 'whaat? who doesn't like nutella' thing to a point where i just don't say it to people anymore if i don't have to? like, it's not even that im actually mad someone pointed it out but fucking just let someone eat their pineapple on pizza or their well-done steak or let them put 1kg of cheese on their food and shut up when someone doesn't like your personal favorite food or puts the milk before the cereal?

why are people soooooo obsessed with 'bullying' people for things that are literally 1000% harmless and bring them joy, just because the thing isn't the 'norm'?

[jaskierswolf]

The Grass is Greener Pt.3/3

CW: More shitty parents...

Previous

Dinner was an absolute nightmare. The food itself was delicious. They ordered from the lovely little Italian place in town that was one of Jaskier’s favourites for board game night with his housemates. Geralt and Jaskier both ordered pizza, which was the totally normal thing to do when ordering takeaway. His mother ordered sea bass with new potatoes, spinach and mediterranean vegetables.

Ciri was snoring quietly in her pram. Geralt had popped home to get it whilst they were waiting for the food as Ciri threw a bit of a tantrum when they’d tried to get her back into her carry cot.

They were eating on the patio table. Jaskier had insisted. They had spent over two hours trying to clear up the garden and his mother was going to fucking appreciate it, seeing as she’d found every reason to pull apart his house.

The carpet was the wrong colour, the oven was shit, his bedroom was a mess (it wasn’t), the bathroom stank even through the jammy door (it kind of did, thanks Regis), the windows were filthy, there were too many beds…

It went on and on and on.

Geralt, who was supposed to be helping to charm his darling mother, was just glaring at her across the table. Jaskier was trying to joke and make awkward conversation but the tension was just too much. He couldn’t do this. Everything he said was met was snide comments from his mother, who’s current favourite topic was Geralt being a single father, because how could Jaskier ever be good enough to help raise a child. Geralt didn’t once defend himself against his mother’s remarks which Jaskier found infuriating but he was immensely glad that Geralt was there to serve as a buffer. He was struggling to remember how he coped in past years without Geralt’s assistance. How on earth had he managed this battle on his own every year?

Geralt had held his hand throughout the entire dinner, which was both amazing and really awkward when it came to eating. Luckily pizza didn’t require a knife and fork. Occasionally, Geralt would lean in to kiss his cheek or brush Jaskier’s fringe from his eyes. Jaskier hadn’t known what to expect from fake dating Geralt. He’d assumed that he would be the better actor out of the two of them, but his mother was throwing him off and Geralt seemed to have slipped into the role as if he were born to love Jaskier, and didn’t that just make him feel all giddy?

Still he could do without the death glares being shot towards his mother whenever she said… well, anything really.

“Geralt. A word, please.” He said firmly, squeezing Geralt’s hand and standing up.

Geralt grunted and turned to flee into the house. Jaskier sighed. “Mother, can you watch Ciri?”

His mother nodded and stabbed at the poor dead fish on her plate. He nodded back and ran into the house.

“Geralt!” He called after his neighbour.

Geralt was now the one pacing in the living room. “What the fuck is her problem?”

Jaskier frowned. Why was he so angry? It wasn’t as if they were actually dating…

Jaskier shrugged and tapped out a rhythm on his leg with his fingers as he tried to recap an entire lifetime of terrible parenting as quickly as possible. “I’ve always been the problem child, according to my parents. I came out when I was sixteen after years of running around in my sister’s high heels and dresses. Mother and Father didn’t exactly welcome the news and proceeded to ignore it until I left for uni. When I said I was going to study music they all but kicked me out the house. Apparently being bi was tolerable but not having a ‘proper’ career was a step too far. After uni, I sofa-surfed for a few years until Pris suggested we all get a house together, that’s when Regis practically adopted us and… well… here we are. Present day.”

Geralt put a hand on his shoulder and then pulled him into a hug.

Jaskier yelped, surprised by the sudden show of affection. “Geralt?” He mumbled against Geralt’s chest, trying to ignoring the blooming love in his heart.

“You don’t deserve that.” He grumbled. “Any of that.”

Jaskier pulled back and furrowed his brow. “Yeah, and how would you know?”

Geralt… blushed?

“Geralt?” Jaskier asked, cupping Geralt’s cheek.

“When you moved in you made me cupcakes.” Geralt mumbled.

Jaskier stared in shock at the man in front of him. He’d forgotten about that. They’d been a complete mess and the icing had leaked all over the bottom of the box, but they’d still been edible and Geralt had insisted that Jaskier stay for a cup of tea to try them.

It had just been Geralt in the house at the time. He’d still been waiting for the paperwork to be finalised to be approved as a potential adoptive parent and the house had seemed so empty. It was the same size as Jaskier’s and Jaskier shared with four other people, well, three others and Valdo Marx. Apparently, Geralt had come into some money following a death of a family friend and he’d been able to afford a family sized home. Jaskier had just seen the hot guy next door and decided to spontaneously make cupcakes in a half-baked attempt, pun intended, to get laid. It hadn’t worked and Jaskier had settled for pining for his hot neighbour instead.

How had he forgotten about that?

“Geralt.” He breathed.

“And when I got the flu you came round with groceries and made soup.” Geralt added.

Jaskier swallowed nervously. “I was worried about you. You hadn’t left the house for days and I don’t think I’d even seen you miss a day of work before. You leave every morning like clockwork.”

“You’re a great person, Jaskier.” Geralt chuckled almost nervously, in a way that was making Jaskier’s heart run far too fast in his chest. “And seeing you with Ciri, Jask, you’re incredible.”

Jaskier scoffed trying to calm the torrent of feelings in his poor bisexual heart. “This fake dating is getting to your head, Geralt.”

Geralt hummed and pulled away from him. “Right.”

“Can you please just try and get along with my mother until I can send her off to the hotel room she inevitably booked so she doesn’t have to stay with us, me, with me.” Jaskier stumbled over his words. “Please?”

“Then we can get the pictures for Yen and I’ll be out of your hair.” Geralt grumbled.

Jaskier laughed nervously. Why did that suddenly sound like a death sentence?

God, he was already addicted to Geralt being in his life.

“Right.” He mumbled.

They both sulked back outside to the patio where his mother was cooing at baby Ciri in her pram.

Jaskier turned to face Geralt who had a matching confused expression on his face.

“Geralt, she is just the cutest.” His mother cooed.

“What the…” Jaskier muttered.

“Thank you, Mrs Pankratz.” Geralt said slowly, as if he didn’t trust his words.

His mother bopped the young girl on the nose then turned up to look between Geralt and Jaskier.  “Now then, what’s up with you two? Julian, don’t tell me you’ve managed to ruin your relationship with this young man already!” She snapped.

Jaskier gaped. What the fuck?

This wasn’t his life.

Dear god this wasn’t his life.

Geralt wrapped his arm around Jaskier’s waist pulling Jaskier towards him and placing a kiss on Jaskier’s temple. Jaskier’s heart fluttered in his chest he couldn’t help but lean into Geralt’s embrace.

“Not at all.” Geralt said in his lovely deep voice that made Jaskier’s insides turn to goo.

“Geralt was just worried about me.” Jaskier chimed, the fake smile back on his face. “All sorted now.”

“Worried?” His mother scoffed and then turned to give Ciri a smile that, if Jaskier didn’t know better, would have been described as motherly. “Whatever for?”

Geralt smiled too sweetly. It looked wrong on his face. Jaskier gulped and looked between them. “He’s tried so hard to make you proud, Mrs Pankratz and you have not been kind. As his guest you should be grateful that he’s invited you into his home. Yet everything he does is flawed in your eyes. Makes me wonder, is there something wrong with your eyes? Because your son is… he’s one of the best people that I’ve had the pleasure to meet.”

“Excuse me?!” Jaskier’s mother shrieked and Jaskier decided it would be rather lovely if a big hole would just open up under his feet right.

“And yet, you look at my daughter as if she is an angel.” Geralt growled.

“Oh well. She is rather amazing.” Jaskier mumbled.

“If only you had treated your son with the same respect, maybe we could have gotten along better.” Geralt carried on as if Jaskier hadn’t said a word.

“You have no right!” His mother pointed at Geralt. “No right!”

Geralt shrugged. “Perhaps, but Jaskier was too good to say what needed to be said.”

“Geralt, love.” Jaskier squeezed Geralt’s hand, probably too hard. “You promised.”

Geralt closed his eyes and growled. “Jaskier, I can’t just sit here and listen to her bullshit.”

“Why not?” Jaskier pouted. “I’ve done it for years. One day, Geralt, you had to do it for one fucking day. Why couldn’t you?”

“Because I love you!” Geralt snapped.

Jaskier froze and stared at Geralt.

It was an act.

It was all an act.

Except…. what if it wasn’t?

Jaskier lunged forwards and pulled Geralt into a bruising kiss. He needed to, he needed Geralt like he needed the oxygen in the air. He’d been pining after this man for a year and hearing those words, fake or otherwise, it was too much. He felt a prick of tears in his eyes and he sniffed.

“Oh bollocks.” He mumbled against Geralt’s lips. “Fuck, Geralt, you made me cry. You bastard.”

Geralt pulled back to stare intently into Jaskier’s eyes, searching for the answer to some unasked question. “Jask?”

He sniffed and wiped the tears from his eyes. “I love you too, Geralt.”

Geralt brushed his thumb across Jaskier’s cheek and laughed. “You promised you wouldn’t.”

Jaskier snorted. “You promised to be nice to my mother.” He countered.

They both ignored the squeak of protest from the woman in question.

Geralt scoffed. “Some promises are worth breaking.”

“Can someone please explain, what is going on here?” His mother snapped, causing the girl in her arms to start screaming again.

Jaskier gave Geralt another chaste kiss and winked before turning to face his mother with his hands on his hips.

“Mother, dearest. Please return Ciri to her father and kindly fuck off.” He sneered.

“You can’t talk to me that way!” She protested as Ciri was pulled from her arms.

Jaskier tilted his head. “Oh ho ho! I think I can. You!” He pointed at her. “Kicked me out, or do you not remember that lovely little detail?”

“You’re exaggerating.”

“I’m really not. Now as wonderful as all this has been. You should know that this house is not just mine, I live here with my friends.” He snorted. “As if I could afford the rent on a house like this on my own, Geralt here, is not my boyfriend—”

“Yet.” Geralt added with a smirk.

“—Yet.” Jaskier agreed and winked at Geralt. “He agreed to help after spending over two hours mowing the lawn because it was so overgrown it resembled a small forest. The only reason he helped was because I have no idea how to actually do basic gardening tasks because I am terrible at anything that isn’t music and writing.”

“Jaskier.” Geralt growled.

“Oh and falling in love with my incredible gorgeous neighbour before he even asked me out on a date. It’s an oddly specific talent but has served me remarkably well, I think.”

“Julian!” His mother gasped.

“Oh and I did babysit Ciri a few times, but get this… I didn’t even ask for money!” He laughed at the shock on her face. “I did it because Geralt asked me to and she’s actually rather cute.”

“I can’t listen to this.” His mother started to head back to the front door.

Jaskier was absolutely fucking delighted! Oh he should have done this years ago! He should never have let the woman back into his life. It had only hurt him, but then again would he have tried to fix the garden without her? Would he have ever worked up the courage to ask Geralt out?

Probably not…

He scoffed.

She would hate that he had only gotten a boyfriend because of her meddling.

“I’m leaving!” She called over her shoulder as she stormed out the front door.

“Thank fuck for that!” Jaskier waved after her and then turned to go back in the house.

He almost ran straight into Geralt who was stood right behind him with Ciri in one arm.

Thirteen years he’d put up with his mother’s torture. More than that if you counted the years before he’d come out. All that time trying to be someone he wasn’t just to please her when he could have just left her and his shitty family behind.

Why had he’d been so scared?

Geralt pulled him into a hug and kissed his hair with a hum.

Jaskier scowled as the thought hit him. “Geralt?”

“Hmm.”

“Did you really mean it?” He asked as he rested his head on Geralt’s chest, listening to his  heartbeat.

“Yeah. Did you?” Geralt pulled back so they could see each other’s faces.

Jaskier laughed and cupped Geralt’s face in his hands. “Oh, dear heart, I’ve never been more serious in my life.”

Geralt tilted his head and glanced down at Ciri. “And you don’t mind, about Ciri?”

Jaskier giggled.

“Geralt, darling.” He kissed his new boyfriend chastely and then crossed his arms, putting on his best scary Geralt face. “The child must not be an obstacle.”

Geralt shoved him and he fell over laughing, as Geralt stalked back into the living room.

“I regret nothing!” He called after Geralt before scrambling to his feet and chasing after his grumpy, and still insanely hot neighbour/boyfriend. 

________

More witcher fun!

[star-trekkin-across-theuniverse]

Worthy (pt4)

Author’s note: I am crappy at tagging people. Inbox me if you want to be added, and just keep poking me if I keep forgetting to add you. <3  @rampant-salamander @bolontiku​

I had to wonder if the powers from Thor’s hammer included allowing me to disappear into the floor so I would not have to face the source of my embarrassment again. I wanted to slam the bathroom door and lock it and hide until Thor left. But I somehow guessed his sense of chivalry would be too great to just leave me to die of embarrassment and he would do something stupid, like breaking down the door, to ensure I was okay, instead of just understanding I needed to lick my wounds in private. Particularly when he thought humans were prudish about nudity. Did they walk around in Thor-land buck naked all the time? I mean, if they all looked like Thor that might not be a bad thing. I was far too conscious of my lumps and cellulite and stretch marks to be okay with joining them in the nude party though. 

I dropped the towel and looked at myself in the floor to ceiling mirror, trying to guess what he must have thought when he hauled me off the floor. I was pale. I’d been far too busy finishing my thesis to be out in the sun in the spring, and it was obvious by the way my arms were the same fish belly white as my stomach. The time spent in the lab showed on my tummy and hips and thighs, all of which were broader than they’d ever been before. My roommate had said curvier was a nicer word, but I knew exactly how many slices of pizza had contributed to each new curve, and the fact that none of that skin had seen the sun in months made me feel bigger. I couldn’t lie and say I was completely unsatisfied with my body. I was just bigger than I’d been, and more uncomfortable in my skin. I’d promised myself I’d find some sort of activity to balance with my work life, for no other reason than for my health. I just didn’t buy into hating myself because I didn’t belong on the pages of a magazine. My body housed my brain, and my brain was pretty awesome. The rest was just packaging and resources for keeping my brain safe and at optimal function. But that was what I thought. I cast a critical eye on myself trying to figure out what Thor would have thought seeing me bare-assed on the floor. Given his impatience with my modesty, he probably hadn’t thought much at all.

I pulled my pyjamas on, and had to laugh at myself. The spaghetti strapped tank-top and boxer shorts didn’t cover much more than my towel had. But I couldn’t cross the living room again to find something else if I ever wanted to get rid of the man-god sitting in my living room.

I steeled my courage and opened the bathroom door. He’d figured out how to turn on my television, and had stopped on what appeared to be a documentary about the Avengers Initiative. He laughed at the television and shook his head, then clicked it off when he realized I’d come into the room. 

“Do you want something to drink?” I offered.

“I rather think you do not wish for me to stay that long, Ella Carmichael.” He pushed himself off the couch and walked into the kitchen where I was refilling my wine glass.

“You know, you can just call me Ella. It’s weird to use someone’s first and last name,” I commented. “Are you sure you don’t want a drink? I hate to drink alone.” I held the bottle up in offering. I could see him hesitate for a moment, probably contemplating the honour involved in drinking wine or something.

“If you insist,” he smirked. I poured him a glass and came around the kitchen island to hand it to him. When he took the glass from me, he narrowed his eyes and took my wrist into his hand. He turned it over, palm facing up and ran his thumb across it. I’m not ashamed to admit I got goosebumps; it was more intimate than I’d been touched in recent memory. 

“Have you always had that mark?” I realized he was running his thumb around my left hand in a pattern. I looked down, but couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary.

“I can’t see any mark.” I pulled my hand away and held it under the bright light over the island. Nothing. Thor took my hand again and looked closer, and traced the design out again on my palm. He was seeing something that I was not. He dropped my hand and picked up the hammer from where he’d placed it on the floor by my front door. He put it carefully down on the granite countertop of the island, and pointed at a big fancy three pointed knot on the face of the hammer.

“This is called a triquetra. It is also on your hand. I would know how long it has been there,” he explained. I shrugged.

“Well, I can’t see anything at all. But that’s the hand I picked up myewlnor with. Maybe it left a mark?” I knew I was completely butchering the name of the hammer, but god knows I couldn’t remember how to say it.

“Mjolnir.” Of course he would correct me.

“Mee-owl-neer?” I tried again.

“Mjolnir.”

“M-yol-neer.” I was reasonably sure I had it right that time. He nodded, and took my right hand in his, flipping the palm up. He traced his thumb around in the same pattern.

“It’s on this hand as well. This is a mystery. I do not know you well, Ella, but Tony seems to think you quite intelligent. Intelligence is not all there is to worth. But it is perhaps somewhere to start,” He pondered. I bit my lip.

“I don’t know how you judge worthiness where you’re from, but I’m not anything special. I don’t run around rescuing kittens from trees, or saving maidens from dragons, or curing cancer. I can’t even donate blood. I have some weird antibody.” I protested. Thor’s mouth cocked to one side in a grin.

“I have never done those things myself, and yet I am worthy. I will speak to my father,” he determined. He finished his glass of wine.

“You appear well. Your colour has come back, and you no longer show the signs of shock. I bid you good rest, Ella Carmichael. Thank you for sharing your libation with me, and for indulging my concern,” he bowed his head a little, hefted the hammer and turned. I followed him to the door. He turned as he crossed the threshold and placed a hand on my shoulder. “I will bring news once I have more understanding of what has happened.”

XXX 

“So Thor saw me naked last night.” It was quite possibly the best first-line I’ve ever had. And I got to drop it on Angela as we walked through the build-a-Belgian-waffle line. She dropped her fork on the floor with a loud clatter.

“What? Naked? How?”

“Well, it all started when I had no clothes on,” I began.

“Seriously, Ella. What happened?” She demanded.

“Seriously. I was taking a bath and he knocked on the door. I figured it was you with the passcard, even though I’d said it could wait. So I wrapped my uber-skimpy-Stark-Industries-micro-towel around me, figuring I’d be opening the door a crack and accepting a passcard from you. He was at the door. And he just invited himself in, plain as you like. Said he was concerned about me,” I started. Angela shook her head, and as we walked through the waffle decorating station, I finished filling in all the details. 

Once we were seated at a table, she took one of my hands and looked at it.

“I don’t see it either,” she sighed. “Do you suppose he has weird powers that let him see through things? Maybe that’s why he didn’t care that you were naked. Maybe he sees all of us as naked all the time.”

“You’re confusing him with Superman,” I laughed. “He has x-ray vision.”

“Superman is a comic book character! Thor is real! Who knows what all his powers are.” She cut her waffle up and started in on it. I pushed my waffle around the plate a little and drank my coffee. I didn’t like waffles. At all. I ate the mountain of fruit I’d piled on top of it, but couldn’t bring myself to get into the waffle itself.

“Well, not making a big deal about naked women is one of them. He made it clear he thought my prudishness was weird.”

“He’s weird. Most men would be hard pressed to not scope you out, regardless of how cool they tried to appear,” she stated, and then made a gesture that looked a little like jazz-hands. “Oh-em-gee! Boobies! Play it cool, dude. Play it cool, and she won’t cover up and then?  More Boobies!” Her fake-guy voice was hilarious.

I snorted on my coffee. “I’m hardly in peak physical condition. He probably was just horrified by the wiggly bits and stretch marks.”

“I don’t think they see past the boobies, to be completely honest,” she laughed. I shook my head and finished my fruit. I’d effectively smushed up the waffle until it looked like I’d eaten some of it. 

“What is on the agenda for me today, boss?” I changed the topic and drank my coffee. Angela pulled out a tablet and flicked through it.

“More orientation stuff. We’re going to go to distribution, and learn how to requisition things for your project. And how to req for your apartment too. And how different the two forms are and how important it is to make sure you use the right form,” she started. “Here’s a hint. The importance of using the correct form is inversely proportional to how similar the forms are to one another. You won’t believe that will take most of the morning, but it will. Then you’re seeing Markus after lunch.”

“Can I order bigger towels from distribution? Because the towels in my apartment are ridiculously small.”

“I don’t think so. But you can also requisition outside items from your in-suite purchasing app. Or I can just take you to Macy’s after work,” she suggested. “Are you not going to eat the waffle?”

“Confession?” I made a face. She nodded. “I hate waffles. They’re like a pancake with a skin disease. Disgusting.”

“I take back every nice thing I said about you. Waffles are amazing. Those are flavour pouches.” The look on her face was enough to make me bite my lip to prevent the laughter from slipping free. She was gripping her table knife like she might actually stab me. It would be a sticky ignominious death by maple syrup.

“Flavour pustules, maybe. So gross. I’m more of a bacon and eggs girl,” I admitted. Angela shook her head, her eyes cast downward in disappointment. She finally cracked the tiniest grin.

“Damn good thing you’re funny. Because that might be a deal-breaker otherwise. Come on. Bus your table. Let’s get you off to distribution so you can learn about the pedantry of requisitions.” She winked and grabbed her tray, leading the way over to the kitchen cart before directing us back to the elevator.

Distribution might not have been mired down in red tape, bureaucracy and shenanigans if they’d had a single window. But they were located in a sub-level of the building, below the parkade, completely walled in. There was a single door in, and it was right beside the loading bay. The staff kind of looked like they were a lost race of mole people. They were pale, suspicious of visitors and seemed a little paranoid that the rest of the company was out to make their lives miserable on purpose. The main stock clerk all but hissed at us when we came in. 

Angela made quick work of running through the requisition forms. There was a single line that delineated personal requisitions from project reqs, and it was required for payroll deduction where appropriate. It was fair enough, but wouldn’t it have been simpler just to colour code the forms? I asked Angela as much and she clamped her hand over my mouth.

“Do you want to be barred from ordering things? Don’t rock the boat!” She hissed. “If you can control yourself, I want to show you heaven. This is the one thing that distribution does right.” She led me over to a table that had a pile of different catalogues on it. “This is the only part of Stark Industries that is still analogue because catalogues are so much easier than websites. And here’s where your colour coding idea comes into play. Blue catalogues are filled with workplace supplies, divided by shade of blue. The light blue cover is office supplies; the dark blue cover is electrical doodads, etc. You’ll learn them as you need to. The yellow covers are personal items. Light yellow is Stark Industries branded stuff. I do most of my Christmas shopping in the light yellow. My dad has a thing for polo shirts and golf balls. Goldenrod is household items that are covered by your living allowance. Stuff like bedding, kitchen utensils, towels. I think there’s a surround sound upgrade in there.” She handed me a pencil and flipped the Goldenrod covered catalogue open to bathroom stuff. The towel page was dog-eared. Apparently I wasn’t the only one who hated the mini-towels that came standard in the room. I filled in a requisition for towels and a plush bathrobe. 

Angela brought me back to the stock clerk’s desk and walked me through the process for submitting the order. It was complicated. I almost expected to need to know a secret handshake to complete the transaction.

“So that should all be delivered before the day is over.” She led me back out of the department. True to her word, the distribution department and requisition in-service had taken us almost to lunch. We stepped off the elevator on the floor for my research division. “I figured I’d show you your desk before we eat lunch.”

We rounded a corner into the lab area. The space was wide open, from window to window. There were workstations at the periphery of the room. I assumed the conspicuously empty one was mine, but Angela walked right past it to a desk that was covered in stuff. There was a pile of paperwork on one corner that at first glance I thought was probably the information relating to my proposals. The desk itself was one of the Stark Industries touch responsive computers that I’d been desperate to try since the first time I saw one. The monitor was carefully suspended from the ceiling, keeping the desk as clear as possible. On the far side of the desk was a small cactus with a little plastic welcome stick pressed into the dirt, and a box of office supplies.

Angela made quick work of logging me into the computer. The log in sequence unlocked the desk drawers, so I was able to clear my desktop with one sweep of my arm into the top drawer. Angela sucked in her breath in response to the action.

“I will organize myself later. For now, that desk needs to be clear, if I’m ever going to work at it,” I explained. She grabbed the cactus protectively and held it away from my reach. 

“Promise you won’t hurt the plant,” she demanded. 

“Sure,” I agreed. She put the plant back down and disappeared across the lab, quickly returning with what looked like a shelf. While I watched, she mounted it to the window behind my desk. How she did it was a mystery, it looked like it was just hanging there. Some sort of mysterious Stark Tech, I suppose. She took the cactus and placed it on the corner of the shelf, her shoulders square in defiance of my otherwise blasé organizational skills. As though she already knew that I wasn’t going to organize my desk drawers later. I looked over at the desk beside me and saw that all the way down the bank of windows, there were shelves mounted against the windows, holding the various personal treasures of the employees assigned to each desk. My shelf looked kind of boring with just the cactus on it.

“Okay, let’s get lunch. You’ve got your meeting with Markus in 45 minutes.” Angela steered me back out of the lab and over to the elevator.

[hopelikethemoon]

Dinner With Friends (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}

Title: Dinner With Friends Rating: PG-13 Length: 3500 Warnings: Family Fluff and extremely mild angst.  Notes: You can find the Maybe Today, Maybe Forever Timeline here. And release order here. Set in January 1998. Shout to the one and only Tiernan for supplying the twist in this chapter.  Summary: Reader and Javier host the Murphys for dinner.

Taglist:  @grapemama​  @seawhisperer @huliabitch @pedropascalito @rogrsnbarnes @thewallpapergoesorido @twomoonstwosuns @gooddaykate @livasaurasrex @ham4arrow @hiscyarika @plexflexico @readsalot73 @hdlynn @lokiaddicted @randomness501 @fioccodineveautunnale  @roxypeanut @just-add-butter @snivellusim @amarvelousmandalorian @lukesrighthand @historynerd04 @mrsparknuts @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @exrebelshocktrooper @awesomefandomsunited​ @ah-callie​ @swhiskeys​ @lady-tano​ @beskar-droids​ @space-floozy @cable-kenobi​ @longitud-de-onda​ @cool-ultra-nerd​ @himbopoes​ @findhimfives​ @pedrosdoll​ @seeking-a-great--perhaps​ @frietiemeloen​ @arrowswithwifi​ @random066​ @uncomicalhumour​ @heather-lynn​ @domino-oh-damn​ @cyarikaaa​ @ahopelessromanticwritersworld​ @im-still-a-pieceofgarbage @ksgeekgirl​  @yabby-girl @xqueenofthecraziesx @punkass-potato @coredrive @pascalesque @theduchessofkirkcaldy @queenquazar (if I forget to tag you, I’m sorry)

“Stevie!” You called out when she started barking loudly — Josie had ensnared her into a game with Olivia and Emily and her patience seemed to be wearing as thin as your own. 

“Did you really have to name her Stevie?”

Steve questioned, shaking his head slowly as he leaned against the kitchen counter and watched you press the button on the top of the lettuce spinner. 

“I love Stevie Nicks.”

He pointed at you, “And that is bullshit.”

You rolled your eyes. “You’re just jealous that Sofía isn’t Stevie.” 

Steve glared, “Well if it starts with ‘S’.” 

“I’m sorry, do you have an issue with our daughter being named for Javier’s late mother?” You questioned, folding your arms across your chest briefly, before you emptied out the tossed lettuce into a larger bowl. 

“Not when you put it that way.” Steve huffed, shaking his head as he took a swig of beer. “How are… things going?”

You glanced over your shoulder at him, “The drought was quenched almost five months ago. Thank God.” 

Steve blanched, “I don’t need to know about that.”

“You asked.”

He narrowed his eyes, “About how things are going.” He rubbed at the back of his neck. 

You laughed, shrugging your shoulders. “I’m doing better. There’s still difficult days, but I work through them.” You chewed on your bottom lip. “And Javier is good at helping me.”

“He’s always been more than willing to give you a hand.” Steve said with a slow shake of his head. “The two of you were inseparable.”

You felt a faint blush rise to your cheeks. “I know. And we still are.” You grabbed a handful of freshly washed radishes and started cutting them down into smaller pieces for the salad. “He’s still just as stubborn about everything.”

“Shit. Isn’t he?” Steve snorted, rocking his head to the side.”I don’t know how you put up with that grumpy son-of—“

“Mommy!” Josie called out from the threshold of the kitchen. “Mommmmmy.”

You sat the knife aside and turned back to look at her, hands on your hips. “What’s up?”

“I’m hungry.”

“Dinner is almost ready.” You assured her. “Why don’t you go check on daddy outside?”

“Okay mommy.” Josie beamed at you. “Does daddy have sissy?”

“Aunt Connie does, rugrat.” Steve told her, “She’s out in the backyard with your father.”

“Thank you.” She said politely before leaving through the back door, followed by Emily and Olivia. 

“She gets away with everything doesn’t she?”

“With Javier? Oh, yeah. I’m the strict parent. Always.” You shook your head with a laugh. You didn’t actually mind filling the role of the strict parent, mostly because Javier was a marshmallow of a father.

“I wouldn’t have guessed that.” He remarked as he took a drink of  his beer, “You’ve always been the fun one. Javier? I didn’t know that fun was in his vocabulary.”

You rolled your eyes, “For the record, he was actually very fun in Colombia.”

“Really?” Steve gave you a skeptical look. “I think that might be the rose colored glasses talking.” He gestured to you with the bottle. “You were the positive influence he needed.” 

“Yeah,” You agreed. “He would’ve worked himself to death, if I hadn’t been there.” You scooped up the radishes you’d cut, tossing them into the bowl of lettuce. “Can you get the croutons out of the oven?”

“Look how fancy you are. Making homemade croutons.” Steve teased as he grabbed an oven mitt and pulled the pan out of the oven. 

“Josie will only eat a salad if there’s croutons in it.” You explained to him. “Javier hates the store bought croutons.” You grabbed the carton of cherry tomatoes, flipping the plastic lid up so you could rinse them off under the sink. 

You glanced back towards the backdoor as it slid open, a parade of tiny humans reemerging, followed by Connie and Javier. 

“Hot food, coming through.” Javier warned, clicking his tongue against his teeth to get the girls to move faster. “Come on kiddos.” He shooed them out from under foot as he veered towards the kitchen counter and sat the two plates of grilled burgers down. “Ever try to keep three girls away from a grill?”

You pursed your lips thoughtfully as you turned to face him, tilting your head to the side. “I tried it once, which is why I sent them out to you.” You grinned at him.

“It’s fucking hard.” He chuckled before he leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your lips. “Thanks for that.”

“You’re welcome.” You used the dish towel and swatted him in the ass with it. He caught you by the belt loop as you stepped past him, pulling you in for another kiss.

“Need any help?” Connie questioned as she cradled Sofía to her chest, looking between the two of you. 

You shook your head, “You brought the potato salad and you’ve kept her occupied so I could get everything else ready.” 

“Do you have ranch?” She questioned as she looked towards the bowl of salad, “It’s the only way we can get Olivia to even humor eating something green.” 

Javier nodded, “Josie likes it on broccoli.” He stepped around you and pulled open the fridge to grab the bottle of ranch, as well as the other salad dressing options. 

“How do you get her to eat raw broccoli?” Connie questioned. “It’s an uphill battle to get anything green into the girls.” 

“Josie likes food.”

You rolled your eyes, “Josie will eat anything Javier asks her to eat.” 

He shrugged, “It’s true.” 

“I wish Steve had that effect on the girls.” Connie laughed softly, “He can get them to eat plenty of candy.”

You snorted. “He loves his Werthers.” 

She widened her eyes dramatically, “I swear to God, every pocket is full of wrappers!” 

Javier clicked his tongue against his teeth, “Should’ve done the patch, rather than going cold turkey.” 

“That would make sense,” Connie made a face. “Oh well.” She bounced Sofía in her arms as she started to wake up, “Did you see California is set to ban smoking inside bars?”

“They’ll just ignore it,” You countered, grabbing a tray and putting the salad and the salad bowls on it. “But it’s progress.” 

The three of you headed into the dining room, where Steve had managed to corral the girls into their chairs. 

“I don’t want a burger, mommy.” Josie complained as Javier sat the plate of burgers down on the table. 

“You’re not eating a burger, babydoll. You’re having a soy one with me.” You promised her, pointing to the second plate that contained two burgers that were considerably thinner than the actual hamburgers. 

“I want chicken.” 

“Princesa, you’re eating what we made for you.” Javier warned her, sitting down beside her, across the table from you. 

“Do we have everything?” 

“French fries?” Olivia questioned.

“Your mother made potato salad,” Steve told her, pointing to the Tupperware tub. 

You sat down beside Connie, taking Sofía from her so you could get her settled into her highchair beside you. You used your fork to grab a potato out of the dish of potato salad, plopping it onto Sofía’s highchair tray. You smashed it up with the fork, “You wanna try a bit of potato?”

Sofía seemed skeptical. She reached down and squished the potato between her fingers. 

You tapped your finger against your lips, “You eat it, sunshine.” 

Sofía gurgled and threw herself back against her seat, smearing the potato all over her face.

“Close enough.” Javier chuckled, shaking his head as he slathered mayonnaise on a bun for Josie. 

“More!” She urged, hanging on his arm. 

“Josie.” You gave her a look across the table. 

Sofía kicked her feet against the highchair as she leaned over and tried to reach the tub of potato salad that was well outside of her reach. “You like that?” You questioned, grabbing another potato and putting it on her tray, smashing it up for her again. 

She dramatically hummed her delight. 

“Look at that, she’s not always a grumpy baby.” Steve remarked with a short laugh. “I worried she was a carbon copy of her father.” 

Javier glared at him, subtly flipping him off so Josie couldn’t catch him.

You worked on fixing your own burger, glancing around the table to make sure everyone had what they needed. You really hated playing host. An ideal situation was a box of pizza thrown in the center of the table for everyone to fend for themselves. But Steve and Connie were such gracious hosts, you felt like you had to do the same. 

Javier had lived on grilled cheese, whiskey, and cigarettes for the majority of his bachelor years. He wasn’t one to complain. He wasn’t actually half bad in the kitchen when he put a little effort into it. 

“How’s things at the hospital?” Javier questioned Connie in between bites of burger. 

Connie grabbed her napkin and wiped her mouth off before answering, “Good. I’m not working as many double shifts as I was there for a while. I’ve actually had days off that felt like days off. No catching up on sleep.” 

“With my transition out of the DEA, it’s been nice to have her around more.” Steve added. “Hun, did you tell her about that lady you’re working with?”

You arched a brow, looking at Connie expectantly. 

“Oh! I totally forgot,” She laughed, taking a sip of water before she continued. “We’ve got a new medical social worker working on the floor that looks so much like you. I did a double take the first time I saw her. Do you have a secret younger sister?”

“Nope.” You shook your head, reaching for your bottle of beer and taking a swig. “Is my doppelgänger nice at least?”

“An absolute sweetheart.” Connie said with a grin, taking another bite of her burger before adding, “She’s actually from Medellín.”

Javier dropped his fork, causing it to clamp against his plate. You shot him a curious look, a brow arching upwards. 

“Colombia?” He questioned, taking a drink of beer to keep from choking on the bite of burger he’d swallowed nearly whole. 

“Is there another one?”

Steve cleared his throat, “You hadn’t mentioned she was from Colombia.” He looked between you and Javier with a knowing look. 

“I believe she came here as a political refugee. I didn’t ask for specifics.” Connie shrugged, “Why?”

The look on Javier’s face made the lightbulb come on. Holy shit. 

You leaned an elbow against the table, turning towards Connie. “Her name wouldn’t happen to be Elena, would it?”

Connie’s brows shot upwards, “Yeah! Wait — do you know her?”

“Some of us better than others.” Steve muttered under his breath, much to Javier’s horror. 

“Yeah.” You nodded your head slowly, “She was great. I’m glad she’s gotten herself out of that situation.” You looked towards Javier then, smiling a little. “I guess that promise of safety had follow through.” 

Javier rubbed at the back of his neck awkwardly, “I had no idea she was in Miami.” 

“It’s fine, Javi.” You assured him, “It’s a small world.” You watched him as he nodded his head slowly, staring down at his plate of food. Of all the people that the two of you had known in Colombia ⁠— the sheer irony that Elena had made her way to Miami was… something else. 

“I feel like I’m missing something.” Connie remarked, looking between the three of you curiously. “What am I missing?”

“Not in front of the kids.” Steve stated with a shake of his head. 

“Daddy, you gotta eat your veggies.” Josie said sweetly, pushing the bowl of salad towards Javier. “Don’t you wanna be big and strong like me?”

“Of course I do, princesa.” He leaned over and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. 

“Javier, it’s fine.” You said firmly, shifting in your seat so you could brush your foot against his leg beneath the table. “Don’t get yourself bent out of shape over this.”

“I’m not getting ‘bent out of shape’.” He shot back, pressing his tongue to the inside of his cheek as he stared at you. “I just can’t believe… of all the cities.” 

“What am I missing?” Connie questioned, nudging you in the arm.

You sighed, chewing on the inside of your bottom lip. “Elena was one of Javi’s informants. When was that?” ‘89 to ‘92?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Steve agreed with you, pushing his potato salad around on his plate. 

Javier was so tense you could see the corded muscles of his throat as he stared straight ahead at you. 

“So she was an informant informant?” Connie questioned, brows furrowed as she looked towards you.

“Yeah.” You nodded, “And it’s not nearly as big of a deal as Javier is acting like it is.” 

Javier raked his fingers through his hair, sighing heavily as he sank back in his chair. He scratched at his lightly scruffy jaw, not quite meeting your gaze as he looked across the table at you. “It’s a big deal to me.” 

Connie looked between the two of you, “I really didn’t mean to start something.” 

“You didn’t.” You assured her, giving her shoulder a squeeze. “Hey Javi, did you leave the grill on?” 

He gritted his teeth together before he gave a stiff nod, scooting his chair back and getting up from the table. 

“Daddy, where are you going?” Josie asked with her mouth full of her burger.

“Daddy left the grill on.” Javier offered, meeting your gaze as you got up from the table. 

“Uh-oh!” Josie said with a sing-song voice, entirely oblivious to the situation. 

“We’ll hold the fort down,” Steve promised you as you followed Javier through the kitchen and out the backdoor into the yard. 

He walked a few paces ahead of you, before he stopped with his back to you. You considered staying rooted to the spot where you stood, but instead you moved towards him and curled your arms around his middle, resting your cheek against his back. “Javi,” You started, trying to keep your voice steady. “This is such a non-issue.” 

“For you.” He retorted, resting his hands over yours. “I feel like every time we take one step forward, something happens that sets us back. Every fucking time, baby.” 

“But it’s a non-issue,” You assured him, squeezing him a little tighter. “I liked Elena the handful of times we worked together. I’m thrilled that she’s thriving. Hell, I’m glad she’s here. Miami isn’t so bad.” 

Javier turned in your embrace, his hands settling at your hips. “I didn’t know she was here.” 

“I didn’t think you did.” You reached up and cupped his cheek, brushing your thumb over the rise of his cheekbone as you met his gaze. “Look, I know that’s a period of history you’re not particularly fond of, but… It doesn’t bother me. At all.” You tilted your head to the side, “I thought we were working past this.” You gestured between the two of you. “There’s no other shoe waiting to fall.”

His Adam’s bobbed as he looked down at you, “I just can’t fucking believe she’s in Miami.” He shook his head slowly. “Of all the goddamn places.”

“I think she had a cousin here.” You recalled, “Shit, that was a long time ago.”

Javier nodded his head in agreement, “Yeah.” He ran his hands over your hips slowly, “Last time I saw her was right after you told me…” 

“Did you tell her?” Your brows furrowed. 

“I did, yeah.” He recalled, “I mean she knew about you…”

“I know she did.” You reached you and played with the hair that sat against his forehead. “I thought you didn’t tell anyone.”

He shrugged a shoulder, “It slipped out. I figured it didn’t really matter that she knew. She was happy for us.”

You smiled fondly, “I think we should meet up with her.”

“What?”

“Catch up, see how she is…”

“Baby—“

“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” You raised your eyebrows. “Hell, she might not even want to see either of us.” You shrugged your shoulders. “I just think it’s too ironic that she’s working at the same hospital as Connie.” 

“I’m not going.”

“That’s fine, I’ll go then.” You rose up on your toes and pressed a kiss to his lips. “You need to stop worrying so much, Javi.” You brushed your nose against his as you raked your fingers through his hair at his temples. “I trust you.” 

Javier curled his arm around your waist, keeping you close to him. “What’d I do to deserve you, baby?” 

“Still trying to figure that one out.” You teased, kissing the tip of his nose. “Come on. Connie’s going to be stressing that she’s single-handedly destroyed our relationship if we don’t get back inside.”

“She was mortified.” He chuckled.

“Not nearly as much as you were.”

“I was praying for the earth to open up and swallow me whole.” 

You rolled your eyes. “You felt that way in the sex sho—”

Javier cut you off, covering your mouth with his hand. “Don’t.” He warned you. 

You poked him in the stomach and when he didn’t remove his hand, you swept your tongue over the palm of his hand. That worked. He quickly pulled his hand away, wiping his hand off on the front of his jeans.

“If you want to shut me up, you’re going to have to wait until we’re alone.” You told him, putting your hands on your hips, before walking backwards towards the back door. “But until then, we have guests to entertain.” 

“It’s just Steve and Connie.” Javier followed after you, his arms crossed across his chest. 

“Who are guests we’re entertaining.” You narrowed your eyes at him. “And you’re going to finish your food, otherwise Josie is going to believe she can skip dinner too.” 

“Fine.” He huffed quietly, shaking his head as he slid the sliding door shut behind him. “But we’re dropping this conversation. I don’t wanna talk about an informant in front of the girls.” 

You gave a mock salute, “Sure thing.” 

Javier caught you by the belt loop, pulling you towards him. “I mean it.”

“I’m not going to bring it up again.” You promised, curling your fingers around the back of his neck. “As much as I love torturing you I’m not cruel, Javier.” 

He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead, “Thank you.” 

You smiled up at him, “No ‘thank yous’ needed, babe.” You took his hand into yours, interlacing your fingers as he headed back for the dining room. Steve and Connie had managed to keep the kids entertained in your absence. 

“She’s had about a full little potato.” Connie told you as she gestured to Sofía, “I think most of it got into her mouth.” 

“She gets really into her food.” You chuckled, releasing Javier’s hand as you both returned to your own seats. 

“Where’d you go daddy?” Josie asked, tilting her head to the side as she licked the dressing off a piece of radish, only to dip it into her salad bowl again. 

“Like I told you,” He reached over and smoothed his hand over the top of her head. “I left the grill on.” 

Connie gave you a wary look as you picked up your burger and took a bite. “So…”

“Everything’s fine.” You assured her, looking towards Steve then, “So have you heard any rumors in the DEA about the article?”

“Oh, I have.” He pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek and shook his head. “I hope you don’t plan on looking for a job in the federal government.” 

You feigned offense, “If I ever did, you’d know I had been abducted by aliens.” It was still bizarre to consider that you had spent so much of your early adulthood working towards a role in the very institution you wanted to pull down. 

“Baby, you know I have a class of students that would love to see you teaching.” Javier pointed out, beaming with pride. “End of last semester, I had her come in and give a lecture for the department.” 

You rolled your eyes, “It was a fifteen-minute talk.”

“With a forty-minute question and answer section.” Javier insisted, his eyes meeting yours with an adoration that warmed your heart. 

“I would only disappoint them,” You licked a drop of mayonnaise off your thumb as you sat your soy burger back down. “They already think you’re a tyrant when it comes to papers and grading.” 

Steve laughed, “Isn’t that because you do most of the marking for him.”

“And I go easy on them.” You grinned. “My teachers didn’t take any corners with me and I worked my ass off to get here.” 

“I don’t know if I can picture you as a teacher,” Connie said, giving you a once over. “No, I can’t.”

“Thankfully,” Javier started with a teasing tone. “They’re college students and not children.”

“And what does that mean?” You questioned, looking in between the two of them. “I am a delight.” 

“You certainly lectured us a lot. Back in the day.” Steve joined in. 

“Was I wrong?” 

“Rarely.” He agreed. 

“Well, we can't all be Professor Peña, now can we?” You quipped, nudging Javier’s foot under the table. 

He scratched at his jaw, shaking his head. “No, we can’t.”

“But I’m always interested in dropping in to torment you and Monica.”

“Do the other students know that you’ve all but adopted her?” Steve questioned. 

You started to answer, but Olivia was quick to announce, “I’m adopted!” 

Josie turned towards Javier, “Am I adopted?” 

“No princesa, you weren’t adopted.” Javier assured her as she grabbed at his arm. 

“Was sissy adopted?”

“No. Remember your mommy grew her in her belly?” Javier reminded her, giving Connie a sympathetic smile, before his eyes flickered towards your face. “Out of the mouths of babes.” 

“Seriously.” You laughed as you shook your head, reaching for your beer. “To answer your question, no. They don’t know.”

“Trying to keep things unbiased.” Javier explained as he scooped Josie into his lap, much to her delight. “She actually earned herself a B- on a test this week she should’ve aced.”

“You didn’t tell me that.” You frowned. “Why?”

“Her attentions a little stretched right now.”

“Of course it is.” You rolled your eyes, “Oh to be young and in love.” 

“Old and in love isn’t too bad, is it?” He countered with a wink.

You grinned, “It’s pretty good too.” 

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

A Nightmare In A Dream (Part 3)

Summary: Six months after reuniting with the Winchesters and her brother, things are going good for the reader. She and Dean are happily together and occasionally stay with her brother, Matty, and Sam, who has been getting him used to normal life. Life appears to be heading in a good direction when the past has a way of creeping up again and dropping a bombshell on them all...

Pairing: Serial Killer!Dean x reader

Masterlist

Square: AU!Dean

Word Count: 5,000ish

Warnings: mature (language, angst, death/murder, drugging/kidnapping, family drama)

A/N #1: This is a spin off of A Dream In A Nightmare and takes place ~6 months later. It’s recommended that fic is read prior to this one...

_____

Two Hours Later

“I don’t like this,” said Dylan, walking you by the arm down a hall to the other side of the house.

“Leave Matthew alone, Dylan. If you want revenge, you best save it for your sister,” said Lewis, brushing Dylan off. “Away. You’re too volatile right now.”

Dylan huffed as he left, Lewis nodding back towards a shut door.

“Speak to him as discussed. Maim but do not scar,” he said, holding up a small blade before tucking it in your back pocket. “Use that on anyone but the intended and Matty is back on the table.”

“I got it,” you said. You walked forward and into the room, Dean in a furnished bedroom. There was an on suite attached and a frosted glass window that let a hair of light in. He was sat on the middle of the bed, playing with a stray thread on the bottom of his jeans. “Dean.”

“Go away,” he said without looking at you.

“Dean,” you said. He flew off the bed and shoved you back against the wall. You felt a shock in your arm and Dean broke off, falling back onto the floor. He rubbed his ankle and you saw a small box cuffed to it. “If you don’t do that again, you won’t get shocked again.”

“Fuck. You,” he said, cocking his head at you. You pulled out the knife and he swallowed. “Y/N…”

“Turn around. Lay down on your stomach on the bed,” you said.

“Or what?”

“Please do what I ask, Dean,” you said as gently as possible. He stood and did as told. You swallowed down the bile in the back of your throat and crawled up on top of the bed, lifting his shirt up. You put a hand on the back of his neck and pointed the blade over one of his old scars. “You really were a nice guy. I mean, you’re a fucked up serial killer but you were nice. It’s not...it’s not personal, Dean.”

“Not personal my ass,” he said, gripping the sheets when you dug in a bit with the knife. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because breaking your heart was an easy way to break you,” you said. You ran your hand over his head and he shuddered. “It was nothing you did wrong, Dean. This was always going to happen.”

“You’re doing this to save, Matty. Tell me you’re doing this to save him,” said Dean quietly.

“Dean, I’m sorry but I’m doing this because it had to be done. You’re supposed to be with Lewis. The sooner you accept that, the easier this will be for you. Trust me. When you let go, when you give in, I know it feels like defeat but it’s not. It’s the end of the old you is all. Then you can start to become an even better version. It’ll take time but you’ll understand.”

He didn’t say a word or move as you carved some more, a few stray sniffles the only sound for a few minutes.

“You gonna be good?” you asked. 

“Yes,” he breathed out.

“Good boy,” you said. You slid your hand down to his neck and back, rolling off the bed and giving his hand a quick squeeze as you scooted off the edge. You prayed it was enough of a signal that you were still on his side. He never moved a muscle though as you walked out, Lewis shutting the door after you. You handed the knife back and Lewis looked you up and down. “What?”

“You play crazy a little too well,” he said.

“Do you really think I’m a normal person, Lewis?” you asked.

“No. None of us are,” he said. He rested a hand against your lower back and walked with you back towards the hall before he veered the two of you left and you wound up in a kitchen. You stared at him as he left you by the entrance, waving for you to take a seat at the kitchen island. “Sit. I’m assuming you’re starving.”

“One, aren’t I going back to my room and two, aren’t you going to go clean up Dean?” you asked as you sat. 

“Kid, I’ve known you a long time. You’ve been under my thumb just as long as Dylan and Matty. I know you went along all those years to save your brother. You had your freedom but you knew when to answer to me. I don’t see why we couldn’t return to that kind of arrangement. If Dean wants to be cleaned up, he needs to ask,” said Lewis. He opened a fridge and pulled out a casserole dish, sticking it in the oven. “It’ll be about twenty minutes. Dean wasn’t too hungry tonight so you can have his leftovers. Chicken casserole.”

“Dylan wants to kill me. I don’t think he’d like the idea of an arrangement between us,” you said. Lewis set a glass of water down in front of you, your tongue jutting out to lick your lips.

“Dylan’s not in charge. I am,” he said. “Drink if you’re thirsty.”

He got out a plate as you chugged down the cool water, a heavy breath escaping when you finished.

“As I was saying, you don’t have to go back in that room ever again,” he said. He put the plate in front of you and set a fork down beside it. He went back to the fridge and you glanced at the fork. It was far too blunt to work on him and Dylan was somewhere in the house you were sure of. “There is a real bedroom, just like Dean’s you may use tonight.”

“This arrangement, Matty is left alone and I get my freedom for what exactly?”

“The occasional interaction with Dean. Something like you just did. It’ll prove you were never on his side. You never were, Y/N, just to be clear. You knew you were going to give him to me before you even met him,” he said. “I don’t blame you for falling for him. He is special. But he’s not worth throwing away all you’ve sacrificed for your little brother.”

“I’m judging by this house you have a shitload of money,” you said.

“Yes, I do. Are you really going to ask for money?” he chuckled.

“I think we can both agree Matty will never be able to have a normal life. When Dean goes missing because eventually he will be declared missing, all of the Winchester money I have access to is gone. I need to provide for my brother and myself,” you said.

“Name your price,” he said, leaning back against the counter.

“Ten million,” you said. He smiled and looked down at the floor. “Ten million and consider me on retainer for whenever you need me to play a part for Dean.”

“That’s a lot of money, kid. I can’t exactly take it out of the bank all at once,” he said. “A deposit that big would get even bigger red flags.”

“You’re telling me that you don’t have offshore accounts? I’m not expecting it today, Lewis. I obviously need to stick around for a while to help convince Dean I was always playing him. There’s time to get it in place,” you said.

“Ten million is all it takes to get you to turn on him,” said Lewis. “Must not be true love after all.”

“I love him,” you said, Lewis lifting his chin. “But I love my brother more. I want out of this mess. I had a taste of it the past few months. I just want out. If I have to leave Dean behind to fend for himself...that’s his problem. His family fucked up mine’s lives. They fucked up my brothers. He fucked up me. So yes, I love him, but I’m not living in Hell anymore because of him.”

“Good answer,” he said. He walked over to the stove and turned the oven off. You cocked your head and he pulled out the dish, tossing it in the trash. “Oh, it was poisoned. Not enough to kill you but to make you wish you were dead. We had pizza.”

He opened the fridge and pulled out a box, tossing it on the counter towards you.

“Give me a few days to gather the money together,” he said, taking the pizza and throwing it on a plate before he nuked it in the microwave. “I appreciate your honesty. If you said you hated him...well then it’d be obvious you were lying. I can see that this hurts you. But you understand when to walk away because of your intelligence. I always knew you were the perfect choice.”

“I need something else,” you said.

“Don’t push it,” he said, popping open the microwave and sliding the dish in front of you.

“Well if I’m gonna be staying here the next few days, I’m gonna need some fucking pads,” you said, glancing down at your lap. “Get the picture?”

“Dylan!” shouted Lewis. He walked in and ignored you, staring at Lewis. “Go to the store and buy some pads for Y/N. Now, please.”

“No fucking way. You do it,” said Dylan.

“Your sister is eating dinner. She is making progress with Dean whereas you give him reason to doubt everything. If you can’t even pretend to like your sister, you’re gonna do the fucking shopping, got it? Now, Y/N, do you need anything else?”

“Normal for the day, thick kind for night,” you said. “And get me some green apple shampoo and conditioner.”

“She doesn’t need-”

“Go. Now,” said Lewis. Dylan grumbled but left, the front door slamming elsewhere. “Pain in my ass that kid is. Always been so angry. He doesn’t think, doesn’t see the big picture.”

You let Lewis go off on a rant to himself as you ate, even eating a piece and a half cold straight out of the box. Lewis had stopped muttering when you finished, looking you up and down.

“Have enough?” 

“Yes,” you said with a nod. “May I go to my room?”

“Across the hall from Dean,” he said. “You can take yourself. I’ll bring you your items when Dylan returns.”

“Thanks,” you said, sliding off the stool, pausing on your way out. “Can I ask you a question about Matty?”

“What about him?”

“Why not do whatever it was you did with Dylan with him? Matty’s more normal than he has any right to be,” you said.

“Because it’s always good to have contingencies,” he said. “We made a deal. Matty and you did what you were supposed to so Matty got to have TV and oreos and medicine when he was sick. Honor the deal and nothing bad happens.”

“You told me Matty was dead back at that farm,” you said.

“To test you. It’s clear this time around, you learned the lesson,” he said.

“I still hate you,” you said.

“I know you do. Go rest. Make yourself presentable for Dean. I want to start bright and early with him,” he said. You nodded and left the room, walking to the other side of the house. You entered the spare bedroom, similar to Dean’s in a way. The window in there wasn’t frosted and the bathroom had more things like soap and a toothbrush by the sink. You walked over to the bed and plopped down with a groan. All you wanted was a shower and to sleep. 

You could shower later though and for the moment you had to come up with a plan to use your new independence to get Dean out before he got more than a few scratches.

Three Hours Later

You were sat up in bed when Lewis knocked on your door. He came inside and you watched him carefully.

“Get dressed. We’re gonna have a chat with Dean in a few minutes,” he said. “He attempted to shock himself with his sink. That’s a big no no. I warned him and he did it anyways.”

“What am I supposed to do?” you asked as you got up and stretched.

“Reiterate the sentiment that he was wrong to do that and then cut off his left pinky toe,” he said. 

“Is that safe?” you asked.

“Very. You can cauterize it to stop the bleeding. Worked very well with Matthew,” he said.

“Give me ten minutes,” you said, yawning as you padded into the bathroom.

“You have five,” he said before he left. You started to change and throw your hair up in a bun, mentally freaking the fuck out. It was a test. You knew it was. A few cuts that would heal and cause no damage, you could force yourself to live with that. Actually hurting Dean though?

You knew you couldn’t do it. You were fucked. Unless Dylan had a sudden change of heart, you were absolutely fucked.

“Are you ready or what?” barked Dylan as he barged into the bathroom. You rolled your eyes and finished with your hair, glaring at him. “You won’t do it. I know you’re telling Lewis everything he wants to hear.”

“What exactly do you want to hear, Dylan? I’m sorry? I’m sorry I thought you were dead all these years? I’m sorry I didn’t know you were there to try and protect? What the fuck was I supposed to do? I was twelve. I was the same twelve year old girl that asked you to catch the bug in her room, the same twelve year old girl that used to make you watch stupid teenager movies instead of horror ones with her cause they scared me and you never made me feel bad about that. I looked up to you and when you were gone, when I knew the only thing that could keep Matty alive too was to do as told, that’s what I did. I am sorry for whatever happened to you, I am. But shit happened to me too and you don’t see me wanting to kill you for it.”

“You knew I was alive,” he grit out. You stared at him, your head cocked, Dylan looking away all of a sudden. “You didn’t, did you. You always...you would look at me like that when you were a kid and didn’t understand something. You never knew. He said you did.”

“Lewis lies,” you said. “If I’d known, either Matty or I had known, we would have gotten you out. You know what I did to get him out. I would have done whatever I had to for you too.”

“Just...hurry up,” he said, leaving quickly. You sighed and followed him out, fully prepared that this was either going to be the last few minutes of your life or the start of a very long and painful way towards it. You entered Dean’s room, Dylan inside and leaning against the wall. He handed you a knife and you looked over to Dean who was sitting zip tied to a chair. “Wait for Lewis.”

You nodded, Dean glancing over to you. He looked scared and you looked down, Dylan tutting.

“You can’t do it,” he said. He tore the knife out of your hand and went behind Dean. 

“Yes I-” you said, Dylan slicing through the ties and the cuff on Dean’s ankle. Dean kicked him in the face and grabbed the knife, jumping to his feet and rushing over to you. “I was-”

“I know,” he said, shoving the knife into your palm. “I am half-drugged up right now and running off adrenaline so you gotta get us out of here.”

“Well that wasn’t very nice,” said Dylan as he got up, wiping off his bloody nose.

“Let us leave, Dylan,” you said, stepping in front of Dean. 

“You gonna stab me if I don’t?” he asked. You swallowed, Dylan taking a step forward. “That’s a no.”

“He’s psychotic,” said Dean, throwing his arm over your shoulders, feeling him lean on you pretty good. 

“He survived, like the rest of us,” you said. “Please, Dylan. Please help us. I know you’re smart. You know Lewis has lied to you before. Please.”

“Y/N,” said Dean, struggling to keep himself standing. “We gotta go.”

“Dylan,” you said. 

“Give him to me,” said Dylan as he walked right in front of you. He hoisted Dean up onto his back, Dean muttering as he let his head rest on his shoulder. “Let’s move.”

He brushed past you and you followed him to a garage, Dylan laying Dean down in the back of your car. He slid behind the wheel and you joined in the passenger side, Dylan tearing out of there quickly.

“I took off the tracker on your car when I moved it inside and ditched the radio,” he said. Dean groaned in the back and you spun around. “He’s fine. It’s just to make him tired.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m dandy,” said Dean, laying his arm over his face. “Thanks for tearing up my scratches by the way, asshole.”

“Are you always such a whiny little bitch?” said Dylan. “I can drop you off right now for Lewis to come get if you want.”

“Hey,” you said. “Dean’s my family. Threatening him is the same as doing it to me.”

“I literally just threw away everything I’ve known for over a decade for what you said in that bathroom. Cut me some slack,” said Dylan.

“He’s not playing us, right?” asked Dean. 

“I don’t think so,” you said, leaning over and pushing up Dylan’s right sleeve, revealing a few scars on his wrist. “Dylan, you can have a life. There’s a lot of us and one Lewis. He’s not invincible.”

“I almost let him bleed out,” he said with a laugh. “Back at the farm. You cut him good. But he was able to talk. He knows what to say. I should have...I should have let it happen and then gone and found you.”

“I don’t blame you,” you said. “You have to be on our side though, Dylan. I can convince them you’re on it but if you doubt me, I can’t do that.”

“How much do you two know about what happened to Dean as a kid?” he asked.

“He became obsessed with me and tried to kill my family. He killed my mom, in front of me, any other questions?” said Dean, forcing himself to sit up. You climbed in the back and he rested his head on your shoulder. “Y/N, before you talk, I know. It’s okay. We are one hundred percent okay. The second I got in that house, I realized how stupid I was. I knew you weren’t working for him. I always knew. I let myself get scared and that was a mistake. I still love you. I never stopped. I knew the second I saw you that you were working a plan.”

“You’re a really good actor,” you said, giving him a hug. “Did he-”

“He shocked him a few times,” said Dylan. “That’s it. You two can do this another time. Did you-”

“I’m doing this now,” you barked. “So shut the fuck up and get us far away from that house. Maybe stop in a drive through and get him some food while you’re at it.”

“Y/N. Maybe we shouldn’t snap at your brother,” said Dean, giving you a look.

“If I want to comfort the man I love, if I want some comfort after everything that went down the past two days, I’m gonna fucking take it,” you said. You huffed and felt Dean slowly slide his arm around your back, pulling you close.

“We’re okay,” he said. “S’okay. We’ll get some food for the road and then we’ll get far away from here. We’ll call Sam and it’ll all be okay.”

“We should have killed Lewis back there,” you said.

“Maybe but I’m in no position for a fight right now,” said Dean. “I needed you to get me out of there. I’m sorry I do such a shitty job at protecting you.”

“I am fine, Winchester. You protect me more than you know,” you said. You shut your eyes and felt Dean’s lips press a kiss to your temple. “I needed that.”

“Me too,” he said quietly.

“Feel okay?” you asked. He nodded.

“Tired. A little hard to move. I’m alright,” said Dean. “You?”

“Hungry but I’m good,” you said. You sat quietly for a few minutes running your fingers through Dean’s hair, feeling him relax around you. You lifted up the back of his shirt a bit, feeling a few small bandages over his back. You sighed but Dean nuzzled into your neck more with a hum.

“Love you,” he murmured, giving you the best hug he could manage.

“I know where he’ll go,” said Dylan. “If I’m allowed to speak that is. Not like you two are the only ones that went through something or anything.”

“I’m sorry for yelling, Dylan. If you have any information on what his next move might be, we’ll gladly take it,” you said.

“Why were you asking about when I knew Lewis as a kid again?” asked Dean as Dylan pulled into a burger joint drive through.

“It sounds like you’re missing part of the story,” said your brother. You caught his reflection in the rearview mirror and he looked back at the menu. “We’ll talk about this later. You two need food and then rest. It can wait until morning. Now what do you want to eat?”

“You look better,” said Dylan twenty minutes later. You were out of town, parked on the edge of some farmers field, Dean sat on the trunk while he ate.

“Not so foggy,” said Dean, taking a big bite of his third hamburger. You chewed on you chicken nugget, Dylan sipping his soda as quietly as he could. “Thanks for not being a psychopath anymore.”

“Probably still am one to be honest,” he said. “I hurt her and was going to hurt her and Matty even worse. That’s not normal.”

“No, it’s not,” said Dean. “Welcome to our lives.”

“Lewis said you have a hobby of killing bad people. He could never prove it but he suspected,” said Dylan.

“Yes, I do that,” said Dean, eating a handful of fries.

“You gonna kill me once Lewis is gone? I did kidnap you and hand you over to him,” he said.

“I could. I have a counter proposal,” he said. You glanced at Dean and he gave you a short smile. “One that doesn’t involve you getting killed.”

“Why would you take the chance of letting me live?” he asked.

“Because you have something very important to do. You need to be a big brother again. You need to have a real family again. I ain’t saying we’re normal. We talk about weird shit at dinner more often than not. But we all have had our lives changed by Lewis. We can help you start over. We find we work better together than apart,” said Dean.

“It doesn’t mean you can trust me,” he said. “What if I don’t want you people? What about then?”

“Dyl-” you started, Dean sliding off to the ground, steadying himself on the trunk.

“I ain’t gonna let you hurt your sister or brother or mine,” said Dean. “If you want to be pissed at someone, be pissed at me. I’m the reason Lewis ever came into your life in the first place.”

“That’s not exactly true,” said Dylan. 

“Yes, it is,” you and Dean said.

“Your dad, John, he have any sort of strange animosity towards Y/N? Like, beyond what you’d expect? He not come by too often?” asked Dylan. 

“Why?” asked Dean, carefully looking at you.

“There’s a reason Lewis picked you, Dean, and it’s not because he has a crush,” said Dylan. “You had the unfortunate luck of being oldest was all.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you asked. You crumbled up your trash and crossed your arms, Dylan tilting his head back. 

“It means John has never told you the whole truth. You two know how to research for a kill I bet, plan it, execute. You’ve never gone and looked at your own lives though. You said it yourself, Y/N. You guys were kids. Kids don’t know the full story. I mean think about it. Why would a CEO’s family for a billion dollar corporation go into hiding? Why would Dean not get to go into witness protection with John and Sam? Why would the FBI get involved but never go after Lewis? Why Dean in the first place? Why not go after a much easier kid to mess with? Why would you pick a family with public visibility? Think about it.”

“But if he’s not obsessed with Dean, why-” you said, Dylan holding up his hands.

“I didn’t say the guy didn’t snap eventually. He definitely wants Dean and for good. But because he loves Dean? You’re both smarter than that,” said Dylan.

“Y/N,” said Dean. “Get ahold of Sam. Tell him we’re going to him. He needs to hear this.”

“Is that a good idea?” you asked. 

“What do you say, Dylan?” asked Dean.

Dylan walked past you and opened the backdoor, rifling around in your bag for a moment before he stood back up with a shirt in his hands. He rolled it out and covered his eyes with it. 

“Well it’s either this or you kill me and leave me out here. Your choice,” he said.

“I’ll drive. Dean, keeping your eating food, honey,” you said. You sat Dylan down in the backseat, Dean taking the rest of his food to the passenger side and climbing inside.

Ten minutes later you were heading towards the cabin safehouse, Dean letting out a burp. He looked over his shoulder, Dylan with his head down and staring at his lap.

“You okay back there?” asked Dean.

“I’m fine,” he said quietly. “I wouldn’t trust me either so it’s cool.”

You pressed your elbow against the window and rested your head in your hand, letting out a sigh. 

“You watch sports? Football? Basketball?” asked Dean. You glanced over to him quickly, sitting upright again.

“Mostly football. NFL, college,” said Dylan. “This your attempt at bonding or something?”

“Well it’s a long drive and I think we’ll all go nuts if we don’t break the tension. Who’s your team?” asked Dean.

“Patriots,” he said.

“You are not earning yourself any brownie points with an answer like that,” laughed Dean. “Seriously? The Pats?” 

“They’re very good at winning. You a fan of the Dolphins or some shit?” asked Dylan.

“Kansas City. Come on man. We’re from the area. You gotta go with your home team,” said Dean. “Y/N and I got tickets for Kansas State in a few weeks. Maybe you’d want to come? Ever been to a game?”

“No. Is that such a good idea?” asked Dylan.

“Well, I think we’ll all either be dead or Lewis will be in three weeks,” you said. “We can get an extra ticket if you want. Sam and Matty are gonna go too. It was supposed to be his first trip out.”

“Trip out?” asked Dylan.

“Matty has a new identity. We knew there’d be too many questions. He’s doing really good all things considered. He even passed his tenth grade state history test last week,” said Dean.

“You teach him school and shit?” asked Dylan.

“I want him to have as normal a life as possible. Maybe he’ll never fall in love or have kids or whatever but I want him to be able to go out to eat or see a football game or go on vacation to the beach,” you said.

“Lewis said he was stupid, didn’t know anything.”

“He’s not. He’s far less socially awkward than you’d expect. He’s grown a lot,” said Dean. 

“I’m starting to realize Lewis lied about my siblings a lot.”

“Well, Y/N’s giving you a chance when we all know it’d be a lot easier to kill you and be done with it. I’m a serial killer and she calls me a good man. You might not know each other anymore but that should give you an idea of the kind of person she is,” said Dean.

“I know. If it’s gonna be awhile, I want to try and catch a few hours sleep if that’s alright,” he said.

“Sure. We’ll wake you when we get there,” said Dean. Dylan slumped back in his seat, still enough that you figured he was in a half sleep at least. Dean reached over and grabbed your hand, holding it across the console. 

Even if he too eventually fell asleep, he didn’t let go for the next six hours.

______

A/N: Read the Final Part here!