#dawww i just love sarge being soft

[infartoomanyfandoms]

This is so cute!! 😭

A Very Red Christmas in Blood Gulch

I have this scene stuck in my head, sorry if its not super great, its been a long time since I wrote anything decent

Hope you enjoy!

---

"Merry Christmas, Sarge!" Donut saluted quickly (and improperly) before shoving a gift bag towards Sarge.

"Appreciated, now where's everyone else?"

"Just coming, sir", simmons wandered into the room with Grif in tow. Simmons was in his undersuit but Grif was still in pyjamas, looking like he'd just rolled out of bed, which he probably had. Lopez came in last.

"Good. Now men, today is the greatest, and reddest, holiday of them all. Christmas! And so we will be celebrating appropriately. Here's your cards."

Sarge quickly handed each of them a card.

"Uhh, where we supposed to be getting gifts? Because I didnt so that", Grif yawned while opening his card.

"Grif, I would expect nothing more than for you to be a disappointment even on the reddest holiday of the year, which is why I entrusted Simmons with buying a gift for me in your name"

Simmons was currently staring at the front of his card with watery eyes. The card said 'Merry Christmas to my Son'.

"....dude, are you crying?" Grif hadnt been moved at all by his own card, which also said son on the front but had a torrent of insults written inside it.

"What, no! Of course not." Simmons quickly dried his eyes and then handed over two gifts to sarge, "Merry Christmas, sir. Thank you for the card."

"Kissas"

"Shut up"

Donut looked over to where lopez was staring at his card, he couldn't really tell how lopez felt about it, because lopez didn't have a face, but luckily Donut was pretty good-ish at reading body language.

"Don't like your card, Lopez? Whats wrong, do you not like Christmas?... ohh, are you Jewish? We shouldn't have assumed"

".......No. No soy judío. Soy un robot."

Donut turned to Lopez, "robots can still celebrate holidays! I heard that Sheila is celebrating," he said teasingly, "I also heard caboose got her a really nice present, you'll have to get her something really good if you're gonna win her heart!"

Lopez didn't say anything but he walked away after few moments.

"Ah young robot love." donut sighed.

"Time to go deliver cards to the blues, men" sarge picked up his gun and another 6 cards before heading out.

"Fine, but I'm not putting clothes on." Grif grumbled before leaving, still in his pyjamas.

Donut grabbed more gift bags and skipped out after them.

Simmons was last to leave, he had taken his card back to his bunk and was just sitting looking at it. It was stupid, he thought, to get so emotional about something as small as a card. But he just couldn't help it, the card and the words on it were the best gift he'd gotten in years. He gave it one last look and smiled before running out to join the others.

---

Lopez had joined them on the walk over.

"Did you find a gift for Sheila, Lopez?" Donut asked as they walked.

"Si." Lopez held up a spanner that he'd stuck a red bow on.

"Aww, I bet she'll love it!"

Grif leaned into Simmons. "Whats a tank gonna do with a spanner?" He whispered.

"...why are you asking me?"

They arrived at blue base.

"Hellooo! We're here for Christmas!" Donut yelled.

Church stumbled out of blue base still in his pyjamas.

"Hey, shut the fuck up reds, people are trying to sleep!"

"At 12pm? You're worse than Grif." Simmons responded.

"Not true, I'd get up at 3pm if you'd let me."

Sarge put his gun away and pulled out some cards.

"Alright blue, get the rest of your filthy buddies out here, we've got cards for ya"

"And presents!" Donut added.

"Presents?!" Caboose poked his head out of blue base's entry way, he was already fully dressed in armor.

"Here's yours, caboose!" Donut held out a dark blue gift bag for Caboose who quickly ran over like an excited puppy.

"Oh I love gifts! I got gifts for all of you too! Just wait here and I'll go get them."

"Now wait a minute there blue, I gotta give you your card", sarge handed caboose a card and then tossed another at church.

"I don't celebrate Christmas" church said flatly, bot bothering to open the card.

"Of course you don't, you're a blue and this is a red holiday! Consider this an act of war!" Sarge yelled back.

"Thats not— y'know what, nevermind"

Church wandered back into blue base.

"Tell the rest of your buddies to get out here!" Sarge shouted after him.

Caboose had torn open the his card and was slowly reading through it. His card said 'to my son' like the reds' cards but had 'blue' written in pen above the word son, inside it had a message about how caboose was pretty great for a blue and would always be welcome on red team (if he was willing to give up his blue ways).

"Aww, thank you seargent!" Caboose picked up sarge to big him a big hug, "I like being on blue team, but the card is very very nice."

Sarge tried to look unbothered by the bone crushing hug.

"Dont mention it blue." He crossed his arms, "seriously, never, ever mention it."

Eventually Tex and Tucker stumbled out the base, looking similarly dressed to church.

"Why did Church wake me up just to talk to you guys?" Tucker groaned.

"We brought gifts! For Christmas." Donut held up the gift bags to show them.

"Oh so this Christmas thing is actually a celebration and not just an excuse to get drunk?" Tex joked.

"Seriously, Tex, what planet were you born on that you haven't heard of Christmas before?"

"Earth"

"I dont buy it"

"Ahem!" Sarge interrupted their conversation. "Here."

The two took their cards as well as their gifts from Donut.

"How did you actually get cards that say 'to my enemy' on them?" Tex asked.

"To Minor Junior Private Tucker negative third class— thats not a real rank— have a terrible Christmas, lots of hate, from red seargent of the red army, the greatest army in all of blood gulch." Tucker read his card out. "Gee thanks."

"Your welcome."

"Thanks for the invitation to join red team Sarge but unless your gonna pay me I have to decline." Tex's card had included a very inspiring message about how great things would be if she joined the red team.

"Hey sarge, you want me to pay Tex 300 bucks to join red team?" Simmons asked.

"You clearly don't know my prices."

Caboose came back out the base carrying a pile of haphazardly wrapped gifts.

"I brought my gifts presents, here you go!" Caboose's tossed a gift at each of the reds. Each one was clearly some sort of gift wrapped weapon.

"Thanks.... caboose..." Grif said, looking at what was definitely a hand pistol.

"Oh I love grenades!" Donut said, "thank you caboose, these are perfect."

Caboose grinned.

"Your welcome!"

"Oh! You know what, I've actually been wanting to get a knife for ages," Simmons said, "thanks Caboose."

"Mm. No blue shotgun will ever replace my superior red shotgun, but I... appreciate it," Sarge said reluctantly.

"What did you get, Lopez?" Donut asked.

"Un rifle roto. voy a encontrar a Sheila."

"Huh, hey Caboose did you know that the gun you gave Lopez is broken?"

"Yes."

Tucker looked between caboose and lopez.

"This is getting weird again, I'm going back in."

Tex turned to the reds.

"Well thanks for coming by but we've got our own Christmas stuff to do I assume, see ya"

"Ah yes. I better go too, bye guys! Thanks for the presents, Merry Christmas!" Caboose yelled before running back inside.

"Well that was nice, should we go back?" Donut asked, " I made Christmas snacks and they're ready to eat!"

Why didn't you say so, let's go" Grif turned away and started heading back to red base, going faster than he had on the way there.

They all started heading after him, ready for a day of very-red Christmas celebrations.

Sarge watched his team with a strange warm feeling in his chest.

"Merry Christmas, boys."