#darthvaderattheendofrogueone

[apairofcrepeswiththerarestape]

#footballz happy birthday to Kam Chancellor! You are a v good person smasher on my favorite team! You do things that were I to be playing against you would scare the crap out of me! You crumple other humans and wear a scary visor and your celebratory dance is pretty much just pounding your fist into your palm! You are kind of like if the Darth Vader part of the end of Rogue One played football! Why do I enjoy watching you inflict such pains on other humans so much? Why do you seem to enjoy it so much? There are probably some pretty gross answers to these questions but haha I'm totally going to ignore them because I don't want one my favorite things to be ruined (also before you get all hoity toity you should know that anything you enjoy that's made by humans probably is built on the pain and exploitation of other humans, even just the device that you're reading this on! HAPPY MONDAY DAWWWWWGGSSSS!)! I hope someone gives you a puppy or something to downplay how scary you are today, Kam Chancellor, because it's your birthday! #footballzeroftheday #footballzbirthdays #kamchancellor #seattleseahawks #rings #badass #humansmasher #darthvaderattheendofrogueone #weareallexploiters #upbeatmondays