#daria is supposed to be a mermaid

[nox-in-a-box]

I kind of just made this one up as I went—it wasn't even supposed to have a background. But uh, here's the character that I named Daria for now.

[sketchedshark]

Carole & Tuesday is not what I hoped it would be

When I started my rewatch this year I was planning to give it a glowing review. The last time I watched this anime was in 2020 with my mom when I was 14 years old and I loved it! I thought it was the best anime I had watched that year. I treasured it with all my heart and would recommend it to anyone who breathed; it was so special to me. 4 years later here I am and I’m… saddened. It really wasn’t what I thought it was going to be.

Disclaimer of course before I continue:

This is not a hit piece or a hate piece on the anime, this is just my opinion, it’s all subjective. I’m not saying you shouldn’t like or your a bad person for liking it. I don’t even think I dislike the anime, it’s just disappointing. If you don’t want to hear my critiques you can scroll past it, I do say good things about this anime. I put a little divider to separate it

Trying to write this makes me too sad so I think I’m going to try and make this short. There were a lot of racist imagery in it that really hurt? It hurt to see those caricatures of black people and the very few gender queer people depicted in mostly negative lights.

Daria, who is either a trans woman or a intersex (they use hermaphrodite in the anime’s sub but I’m unsure if that term is dated), looks, for lack of better term, ugly? Not good? Plus she looks “man-ish” which I’m wondering if it is on purpose. On top of that she’s a controlling mother with anger issues

The Mermaid Sisters are also ambiguously gender queer and are also designed to be “ugly and man-ish” and have a vulgar song. Again I don’t know if they’re cis men who like to dress that way or some form of genderqueer but either way it’s an insulting design

Skip’s design is reminiscent of the “big scary black man” and I understand that he’s actually secretly nice but he just looks big and scary but I don’t understand why they had to make him unflattering as well. His giant pink lips and weird looking dreads annoy me.

There are other extras that have this “messy hair, fat light coloured lips” design that really irks me and makes me uncomfortable

I list these but it’s not like the team who made these decisions is incapable of designing good black people because they do. Carole is right there! Amer/Ezekiel, Dann, GGK, Benito, Crystal and Flora are all good designs so what’s the difference here? Why do we have these really offensive designs when these non-offensive ones exist in the same breath?

I don’t think I’m applying western expectations onto a eastern anime when they did do their research. They did do their homework. They just wanted to you to make sure the bad people and the comedic characters looked weird so you could laugh at them more. It really hurts.

side thing that I don’t know how to add properly: I feel like the main dark skinned characters are always lighter and any side or supporting characters that aren’t really supposed to get any attention tend to be darker. Also, the darker skinned characters have an ashy look to them

----------

I’m going to blast through the two flaws I found before I get to the good because I really don’t want to end this on a bad note.

The story in the first part was really charming but once it got to the second part the plot took a weird turn? They were trying to comment on immigration, racism (which has a funny sort of irony given their character deigns) and discrimination. The story they were going for I understand but I felt like there wasn’t enough build up. The first part didn’t have any inclination that this conflict was brewing so when it got to the second half it felt like it came out of nowhere. It felt a bit too underdeveloped and like they had a lot that they wanted to say but not enough time to say it

I’m unsure why they decided to retcon both mothers. They were set up as antagonists in part 1 only to be almost excused? for their actions in the second part. At least, that’s how it felt for me.

Getting to the good stuff I cannot lie that when I wasn’t assaulted by racist caricatures it was pretty charming and mellow. The animation was beautiful. Sure at times it was a bit scuffed, especially when they were using rotoscope, but I don’t think that took away from the overall experience visually.

Again, besides the other weird characters

The music, which is the main focus of the anime, is amazing. I don’t think I have a bad thing to say about the production of it. They used different singers from their VAs instead of having the VAs sing the songs which I don’t mind at all. I’ve seen people not like that because they sound too different and while I get that I don’t think that it’s a big issue. There were a couple songs that I did not like but that just came down to personal genre preference, I definitely recommend listening to all the songs. If I had to pick my favourites they would be “Give You the World”, “Loneliest Girl”, and “Unrequited Love”, I love those three the most.

My favourite moment was during the first episode when Carole and Tuesday were trying to make “Loneliest Girl”. When they were jamming and it was all wonky and messy it felt beautiful and real and I could feel their connection through music. I love how their friendship is written it felt soft and beautiful.

I don’t know if I would recommend this to anyone now, I feel very conflicted even writing this review now because it’s not a bad watch without the weird racism and transphobia (idk if i can call it that or not due to the ambiguity of the characters identities) but it’s hard to ignore since it feels like it’s in your face a lot. Maybe if it’s something you wanna turn your brain off to for comfort them maybe watch it? Just don’t ignore these aspects of the anime. I don’t know if it’s just because I’m both black and queer that this bothers me but for me it’s a big deal breaker that affects my ability to properly enjoy this

--

first review on my blog! i really hesitated to post thing because I really wanted to like this but after going through the whole thing it was just not what i wanted and it made me *sad*

again i really hope this doesnt come off as me hating this anime or dragging it's name because im not and i don't want that to be the take away from this. i just want to share my thoughts

[ladylilithprime]

20 Fanfic Questions

I was tagged by @jazzforthecaptain for this right when I'm supposed to be going to bed. -_-U

How many works do you have on AO3?

172 currently posted, more to be imported and uploaded shortly....

What’s your total AO3 words count?

716,745 as of right now....

What fandoms do you write for?

Whew..... uh, lessee, Supernatural, Marvel Comics/MCU, Harry Potter, Animorphs, Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles, The Little Mermaid, Gundam Wing, Smallville/DC Comics, Highlander, Star Trek, The Sentinel, Stargate SG1, Star Wars, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Sailor Moon, Tomorrow People (New/90s Series), Fullmetal Alchemist, Gravitation, Yami no Matsuei, Weiss Kreuz, Ranma ½, Pirates of the Caribbean, Good Omens, Firefly, Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings et al, Daria, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Phineas and Ferb, Danny Phantom, ElfQuest, Rise of the Guardians, How To Train Your Dragon, El Goonish Shive (don't tell Dan!), Transformers, YURI!!! On Ice, Speed Racer..... uh, yeah, I think I'm forgetting some... or not mentioning them for Reasons.......

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

More Worthy Than Believed (MCU, Gen, Tony-centric, vague IronHawk)

Only Different In The Details (MCU, IronHawk plus Avengers ensemble)

Hel Hath Nick Fury (MCU, Nick Fury/Hela aka Darcy Lewis)

The Shadow You Cast Over Me (MCU, Gen, Tony-centric, unrequited Steve/Tony)

Broken Hallelujah (Supernatural, Sastiel)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Short answer is that I try to? I want to respond to comments, but sometimes I'm out of spoons and it takes me a while to work up the spoons to answer, and sometimes the comment is a demand for an update on a fic I just posted a new chapter for and I lose the motivation to write anything at all for a couple days because gods, I'm thrilled y'all enjoy my stuff but damned if I've usually got the time and energy to write fanfic around Real Life!

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably a toss up between The Shadow You Cast Over Me and A Wish Your Heart Makes. (If you didn't guess one of those, uh, well... ~offers tissues~)

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh, hell, good luck trying to pin that one down! Seriously, I can't pick, go look for yourself.

Do you get hate on fics?

Not...exactly? I mean, I once got some dumbass complaining in the comments of my clearly tagged WinterIron soulmate AU that he wanted to read WinterWindow and "not this gay shit", which, dude, we're on AO3, not FanFiction.Net, the fic was very clearly tagged and you still clicked on it, so you reading "that gay shit" is all on you, buddy. Also, same fic, someone decided that because I talk about Natasha and Yasha being familiar with borscht that I was a Russian Imperialist? I dunno, people are weird.

Do you write smut. If so what kind?

.....Yes, hello, any kind of smut I write that's actually explicit rather than kept vague or Fade To Black has a separate psued. Click at your own risk, not that I have much posted there yet.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Hmmmm.... Do I have to stick with fics that I've posted and can provide links to? I've got a LOT of crossovers that either aren't posted yet or haven't been moved over to AO3 and tracking down the links on the wider web and defunct archives is difficult.... so, I'll just cop to Lethally Blonde, the MCU/stealth-Tropic Thunder crossover, for right now.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Sort of? Someone stole a segment of "More Worthy Than Believed" wholesale and tried to pass it off as theirs a few years back, but it got discovered pretty quickly by folks who'd read the original.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't know? I think someone offered to translate one of my older fics once, but I don't know if anything came of it.

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I'm listed as a collaborator for The Cadbury'verse, but aside from Bang collabs and the vague plans @rodiniaorzetalthepenquin and I have plotted about at three AM that result in one or the other of us writing fics in the same narrative universe, I don't have any posted cowritten fics.

What’s your all-time favourite ship?

~thousand-yard-stare at the above list of fandoms~ .....could you be more specific?

What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Dude, I just updated Only Different In The Details with a new chapter and the last update previously was in 2013! If the fic isn't marked as complete, it'll get finished eventually. (Or I'll die, but it's more likely the fic gets finished before then.)

What are your writing strengths?

World-building. I seriously LOVE world-building, and I really enjoy writing full AUs that really let me flex that!

What are your writing weaknesses?

.....forward planning. I can't seem to do it with any kind of reliability or regularity, and trying to write an outline is a scholastic exercise in futility, not to mention all the times I've gone looking for notes or scene snippets I could have sworn I wrote down or typed into chat somewhere and apparently sharing the vivid fever dream images in my head was yet another dream. On the other hand, I remember three different versions of those scenes in vivid technicolor, so I just have to pick one instead of starting three new WIPs.....

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

This is honestly why I'm slowly teaching myself seven different languages, and you can bet I prefer having a beta for those segments who is a native speaker. (Harder for Latin, Quenya, Vulcan, and Enochian, admittedly....)

First fandom you wrote for?

Trick question. The first fandom I ever wrote for and posted online was Animorphs, but I was writing fanfic as far back as second grade for Disney movies and the Sweet Valley Universe nominally by Francis Pascal. (Yes, I still have those notebooks. No, they will not be transcribed and archived online.)

Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Always the fic I haven't written yet. Always. What I think is my favorite now will not likely still be my favorite next year, maybe not even next month! Hell, I can't even pick a favorite out of the ones I have posted to AO3 right this second! But then, isn't that part of the fun part of writing?

Tagging.... @rodiniaorzetalthepenquin , @karategirl80 , @slytherkins , @youarentreadingthis , @sageclover61 , @hyrulehearts1123 , and @mrswhozeewhatsis . Have fun!

[kahran042]

Gargantuan batch of new incorrect Jonas Corbin quotes!

Jonas: Today is a day of running through hurdles. Brad: Aren’t you supposed to jump OVER hurdles? Jonas: Whatever. Fear is only something to be afraid of if you let it scare you. (Source: 6teen) (Jonas Corbin, Brad Thompson)

Jonas: You can't hold me accountable for the mistakes of my youth. Brad: That was this morning! Jonas: I am still young. (Source: Ace Attorney) (Jonas Corbin, Brad Thompson)

Alicia: Oh no! Jonas and Brad are fighting again! Chloe: sarcastically What a surprise. (Source: Amphibia) (Alicia Ramsey, Chloe Seaver)

Mrs. Kochan: What part of eight AM sharp confused you? Jonas: All of it. (Source: Archer) (Barbara Kochan, Jonas Corbin)

Nate: I'm going to spend my vacation AT THE LIBRARY! (Source: Avatar: The Last Airbender) (Nate Kellerman)

Jonas: I can't believe you, of all people, would say something so cool. Nate: "Of all people"?? (Source: Bloom Into You) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Kiera (about Connor): You know, it’s funny. When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags. (Source: Bojack Horseman) (Kiera Bernhardt)

Courtney: I just saw the hottest boy I have ever seen. We had the most incredible spark. Jadyn: … Courtney: You’re right, I have to find him. Jadyn: I didn’t say anything. (Source: Broad City) (Courtney Anderson, Jadyn Beaumont)

Donna: I’m glad to see you’re doing your homework. How is your math class going now? Jonas: Um…I’m doing great. Donna: HOW great? Jonas: Real great. Donna: Have you been passing all your quizzes? Jonas: I didn’t say phenomenal. (Source: Calvin and Hobbes) (Donna Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: I don’t know if this sales rack has anything worth taking. Chloe: holds up a t-shirt that says “fancy bitch” Oh, spoke too soon! Kiera: Put that back. I’m the fancy bitch here. (Source: Community) (Chloe Seaver, Kiera Bernhardt)

Jonas: You’re becoming dangerous, Kiera. It’s those doe eyes. Disappointing you is like choking the little mermaid with a bike chain. (Source: Community) (Jonas Corbin)

Lydia: I stopped by to say hi, I missed you. Morgan: But we just hung out like an hour ago. Lydia: Exactly. (Source: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend) (Lydia Renfrew, Morgan Urquhart)

Drake: Hey everyone, guess what? Jonas: You're transferring to a new school? (Source: Daria) (Drake Levine, Jonas Corbin)

Nick: Something terrible happened! Mark: It's okay. The sun isn't really gone. It's just hiding behind the clouds. (Source: Daria) (Nick Murphy, Mark Seaver)

Chloe: You're right. Mia: About? Chloe: About knowing who you are. I'm Chloe Seaver. I'm loyal, strong, and I don't look too bad naked. Mia: Exactly. And if I call you a mannish, awkward, ball-crushing do-gooder, you'd say…? Chloe: Shut up, whore. Mia: That's my girl. (Source: Dragon Age 2) (Chloe Seaver, Mia Thompson)

Chloe: You ate my enchilada! Justin: There was no note! Chloe: YOU ATE MY ENCHILADA! (Source: Drake and Josh) (Chloe Seaver, Justin Seaver)

Nate: Cake is not a “sweet.” Cake is the divine essence of the heavens! (Source: Fire Emblem: Three Houses) (Nate Kellerman)

Mark: I don’t know what to do with it. Jessica: With what? Mark: With all the love I had for Hannah. I don’t know where to put it now. Jessica: I’ll take it. I’m serious. It sounds lovely. I’ll have it. (Source: Fleabag) (Mark Seaver, Jessica Beaumont)

Jonas: The power of one person doesn’t amount to much, but however little strength I’m capable of, I’ll do everything humanly possible to protect the people I love, and in turn they’ll protect the ones they love. It seems like the least we tiny humans can do for each other. (Source: Fullmetal Alchemist) (Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: Did you just call me a shrimp, you asshole?! I’m still growing, dammit! (Source: Fullmetal Alchemist) (Chloe Seaver)

Brad (to Jonas): Stop acting like you’re in a manga. (Source: Fullmetal Alchemist) (Brad Thompson)

Chloe (to Jonas): I heard a girlish scream. Are you okay? (Source: Futurama) (Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: I can't believe we get away with this every week. (Source: Garfield and Friends) (Jonas Corbin)

Thom: Courtney, I know you’re going through your whole boy-crazy phase, but I think you’re overdoing the ‘crazy’ bit. (Source: Gravity Falls) (Thom Anderson)

Katrina: So, Lydia, are you a big spoon or a little spoon? Lydia: I'm a knife. Morgan, from across the room: Trust me, she's a little spoon. (Source: Grey's Anatomy) (Katrina Rockwell, Lydia Renfrew, Morgan Urquhart)

Jonas: Ugh, I am so hungry. Donna: Then go make something. Jonas: Ugh, I am so lazy. (Source: iCarly) (Jonas Corbin, Donna Corbin)

Brad: Spiders… why did it have to be spiders? (Source: Indiana Jones) (Brad Thompson)

Alicia: Are you just on the internet all day? Nate: No. Alicia: Really? Nate: I’m also on it at night. (Source: James Breakwell) (Alicia Ramsey, Nate Kellerman)

Brad: How many times do I have to tell you I have a girlfriend? Shana: Well, you look like the kind of guy that could use two. (Source: Johnny Bravo) (Brad Thompson, Shana Levine)

Lydia (to Morgan): If we don’t hold hands soon, I’m going to lose it. (Source: King of the Hill) (Lydia Renfrew)

Samantha: Jonas, is there anything you're actually capable of doing? Jonas: Putting up with you. (Source: Merlin) (Samantha Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: I’m the type of girl who likes to think things through. Brad: Since when? I once saw you eat a marshmallow that was still on fire. (Source: Mike and Molly) (Chloe Seaver, Brad Thompson)

Nate: What am I most afraid of? Global warming. And getting a B. (Source: Modern Family) (Nate Kellerman)

Jonas, about Chloe: Whoa. She's being a little… Nate: Obstreperous? Recalcitrant? Truculent? Jonas: I was gonna say "cray-cray." (Source: Modern Family) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Chloe: I don’t know the first thing about clothes. Pretty much all I can do is look at something and tell you if it’s clothes or not. This chair? Not clothes. (Source: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) (Chloe Seaver)

Chloe: Chillax! Nate: That's not a word. Chloe: Sometimes the ones who deny "chillax" are the ones who need to chillax the most. (Source: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) (Chloe Seaver, Nate Kellerman)

Jonas: I don’t want Kiera to think I’m pathetic. Chloe: You are pathetic. Jonas: Well, obviously! (Source: NewsRadio) (Jonas Corbin, Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: Nate, you're a big softie, but on the inside, you're a straight-up boss. Jonas: Brad, you're the exact opposite. (Source: Parks and Recreation) (Jonas Corbin)

Brad: Okay, that's enough! No more talking about Kiera! Jonas: But you told me to get it out of my system… Brad: I had no idea how much you had in your system! (Source: Parks and Recreation) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin)

Brad (about Jonas): He’s my best friend, he's like a brother to me…but he's a disaster. (Source: Parks and Recreation) (Brad Thompson)

Brad: Jonas said he’ll be here in twenty minutes. That means we’ve got at least an hour. (Source: Peep Show) (Brad Thompson)

Nate: How to put this…hmm…oftentimes when you attempt to help anyone they end up worse off than before you— Jonas: Don’t you think I know that? (Source: Pepper Ann) (Nate Kellerman, Jonas Corbin)

Courtney: Remember when Jonas made that romantic dinner for me? Jadyn: Courtney, he microwaved you a pizza. (Source: Phineas and Ferb) (Courtney Anderson, Jadyn Beaumont)

Donna: Jonas, what have you done today? Jonas: Well, let’s see. I watched some anime. Took a nap. Had a snack. Jonas: I’m a little tired. (Source: Psych) (Donna Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Nate: Jonas wouldn't do anything stupid, would he? Brad: Define stupid. (Source: Psych) (Nate Kellerman, Brad Thompson)

Nate: A-?! My life is flashing before my eyes! (Source: Recess) (Nate Kellerman)

Alicia: When you give up on people’s ability to do good, you give up on hope. (Source: Recess) (Alicia Ramsey)

Nate: For ages, dreams have been thought of as windows to another realm. “Let me not mar that perfect dream by an Auroral stain; but so adjust my daily night that it will come again.” Emily Dickinson wrote that. Jonas: Who? Nate: Here’s one YOU might know. “There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, in the middle of the night, to find that his dream had come true”. (Source: Spongebob Squarepants) (Nate Kellerman, Jonas Corbin)

Mia: Well, people either love you or hate you. Chloe: Really? Mia: I mean, I hated you when we first met. Chloe: I remember. Mia: And now… Chloe: And now? Mia: Well… now I don’t. Chloe: That means a lot to me, Mia, it really does. Mia: Yeah! Now that is from the heart. I really do… not hate you anymore. (Source: Star Trek: Deep Space 9) (Mia Thompson, Chloe Seaver)

Kiera: Are you two friends? Chloe: Yes. Mia, simultaneously: No. (Source: Star Trek Voyager) (Kiera Bernhardt, Chloe Seaver, Mia Thompson)

Nate: I know archaic Latin. Brad: You know archaic Latin? Nate: I got bored with classical Latin. (Source: Teen Wolf) (Nate Kellerman, Brad Thompson)

Jonas: Have you lost it? Monica's gonna kill us! Samantha: No, she's gonna kill you. You're the one in charge. (Source: The Adventures of Pete and Pete) (Jonas Corbin, Samantha Corbin)

an anonymous person sent Jonas a threatening message Jonas: What do I do, and who sent the message?! It could be anyone! Brad: It couldn't be just anyone, it'd have to be someone you've upset. Jonas: … Brad: Yeah, you're right. It could be anyone. (Source: The Amazing World of Gumball) (Jonas Corbin, Brad Thompson)

Brad: Jonas is very soft-hearted. Chloe: Soft-headed if you asked me. (Source: The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh) (Brad Thompson, Chloe Seaver)

Kiera: How can you think of food at a time like this? Chloe: I practice. (Source: The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh) (Kiera Bernhardt, Chloe Seaver)

Nate: Before I do anything, I ask myself, would Jonas do that? And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing. (Source: The Office) (Nate Kellerman)

Mia: Chloe can be so stupid, which I love… I mean, hate! (Source: The Owl House) (Mia Thompson)

Jonas: Hey, Nate, are you having a good time? Nate: Not really. Someone seems to have slipped one of those novelty ice cubes with a fake fly into my drink. Chloe: laughing It was us! You fell for it! Nate: Chloe, Jonas, these novelty ice cubes are often made from highly toxic chemicals. Ironically, a real fly would have been much more sanitary. Jonas: You should see the look on your face. It's priceless! (Source: The Simpsons) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman, Chloe Seaver)

Nick: If it isn't my arch-nemesis Jon-ass Corbin… and his friends Brad Thompson and Chloe Seaver, to whom I'm fairly indifferent! (Source: The Simpsons) (Nick Murphy)

Jonas: I'd sell my soul for a basket of cheese fries! Alicia, holding a pitchfork and sporting horns, a red high-collared cape, goat legs and a red pointed tail, appears in a burst of fire and brimstone Devil!Alicia: Well… that can be arranged. Jonas: Wha - Alicia?!? You're the Devil?!??! Devil!Alicia: chuckles It's always the ones you least suspect! (Source: The Simpsons) (Jonas Corbin, Alicia Ramsey)

Brad: I can’t believe Drake's dead. Jonas: Brad, move on! That was twenty minutes ago! (Source: The Simpsons) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin)

Brad: You’re running away from your feelings. Jonas: So? I hate my feelings! (Source: What We Do in the Shadows) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin)

Brad: Jonas, do you have any plans for the future? Jonas: I'll probably grab the biggest slice and hope you don't notice. Brad: The future BEYOND when our pizza arrives. Jonas: Ooooooh. Deep! (Source: Zits) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin)

Jonas: crying about not being able to get a chocolate bar Samantha: buys and eats chocolate bar in front of him (Source: Reddit) (Jonas Corbin, Samantha Corbin)

Chloe (to Alicia): You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for 'eating Henry'. (Source: Texts from Last Night) (Chloe Seaver)

Mia: Can you imagine getting paid for being cute? Chloe, quietly: You'd be a billionaire. Mia: What? Chloe: What? (Source: Tumblr) (Mia Thompson, Chloe Seaver)

Kiera: So I found a foolproof method of determining if someone is truly evil. Jonas: And that is? Kiera: If they dislike Alicia, they're evil. Jonas, nodding in agreement: Yeah, okay, that's pretty solid logic. (Source: Tumblr) (Kiera Bernhardt, Jonas Corbin)

Principal Mazlish: It's like a war zone in here! What happened?! Mr. Lazara: Well, Corbin- Principal Hickey: Ah, that makes sense. (Source: Tumblr) (Viktor Mazlish, Jim Lazara)

Brad is injured and bleeding Chloe: Is he going to be okay?! Jonas: Yes, just keep applying pressure! Chloe, leaning in closer to Brad: If you die, Jonas and I will have no supervision. Jonas: Not like that! Chloe: It's true! (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver, Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: on the phone with Kiera I can't talk right now, I'm doing hot girl shit. Kiera: You're pulling Oreos apart and taking off the frosting to make a mega Oreo, aren't you. Chloe: Maybe. (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver, Kiera Bernhardt)

Brad: Fun statistical fact: Cows are about 300 times more likely to kill you than coyotes. Jonas: horrified Nate, sighing: Minor sidenote to statistical fact: If it were common for people to keep several hundred coyotes on their property and routinely chase them into a corral and handle them, this statistic would be different. (Source: Tumblr) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Jasmine: Zane is like… Zane, playing a video game: Sniper in that building, 400 yards out, past the trees. Jasmine: Zane is also like… Zane, in real life, opening the fridge, with the ketchup right in front of him: Mom, where's the ketchup? (Source: Tumblr) (Jasmine Kessler, Zane Kessler)

Alicia: One day I'm gonna say the F-word. Then you'll be sorry. (Source: Tumblr) (Alicia Ramsey)

Mark: Do I have a crush on Connor? Of course not. Chloe: I, uh… I didn't ask you that. (Source: Tumblr) (Mark Seaver, Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: Principal Mazlish, I figured out why you're so uptight! You have updog. Principal Mazlish: What's updog? Jonas: BRAD, GET IN HERE I TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Viktor Mazlish)

Alicia: does mic drop Alicia: comes back to see if she damaged the mic or not (Source: Tumblr) (Alicia Ramsey)

Jonas: Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest, that just sounds nice and cozy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods, you're going to die. Nate: It's called connotation. Jonas: Also, "forgive me father, I have sinned", vs. "sorry daddy, I've been naughty". Nate: Great news! Language is now cancelled! (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Mark: I hope I’m not just a bully to you guys, but a friend too. (Source: Tumblr) (Mark Seaver)

Brad: Newton just created a 4th law. Jonas: What is it? Kiera: Put a little hot sauce on that bad boy. (Source: Tumblr) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin, Kiera Bernhardt)

Christi: When I was a kid, I won a contest to DJ at my hometown’s easy-listening radio station. I then proceeded to play an hour's worth of Evanescence deep cuts and ruin everybody’s morning commutes (Source: Tumblr) (Christi Wong)

Colin, texting Peter: Hello Peter. I’d like to play a game. Two rooms away your only brother is very thirsty. In order to remedy this, you must fill up his water bottle. If the water is not cold, he will die. Good luck. (Source: Tumblr) (Colin Gardner)

Logan: Christi, are you with us? Christi: Physically, yes. Mentally? I’m in a Renaissance painting, wearing a silk gown and looking wistfully into the distance. (Source: Tumblr) (Logan Taggart, Christi Wong)

Jonas: So, what’s your type? Chloe: Hazel eyes, kind, oblivious, creative, blond hair. Jonas: Sounds like me. Too bad we’re just friends. Chloe: Did I mention oblivious? Jonas: Yeah, why? Chloe: Just making sure. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: I would let a racoon do surgery on me. Have you seen their little hands? Those motherfuckers would give me a great heart transplant for the low, low cost of a cold pizza slice Nate: You do realize where racoons’ little hands have been, right? Kiera: Is that the…only reason you wouldn’t let a raccoon give you a heart transplant? Alicia: Come on! They're so well known for washing their hands that they’re called “washing bears” in German! You don’t have to worry about where their hands have been! Brad: Well, you heard it folks, getting a heart transplant from a raccoon is perfectly safe. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Kiera Bernhardt, Nate Kellerman, Alicia Ramsey, Brad Thompson)

Lydia: It doesn’t matter if you’re gay or straight, the one thing we can agree on is that I’m hot. (Source: Tumblr) (Lydia Renfrew)

Connor: I wasn’t loved as a child so now I’m evil and I don’t go to bed on time. (Source: Tumblr) (Connor Urquhart)

Chloe: One of my favorite things to do is saying some extremely ridiculous and corny things in front of Mia and watching her go through the five stages of grief as she realizes she’s still madly in love with me. (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver)

Chloe: I don’t deserve this. I’m a good person. Jonas: You once shoved me down the stairs because I made fun of your height. Chloe: I’m a mostly good person. (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver, Jonas Corbin)

Christi: Show up uninvited! Invite yourself to the party! Be the belle of the ball! Make a scene. Get kicked out. Set fire to the lawn. (Source: Tumblr) (Christi Wong)

Nate: Dracula is an epistolary novel because it’s made up of letters. Jonas: Of course it’s made of letters. It’s a book. (Source: Tumblr) (Nate Kellerman, Jonas Corbin)

Jonas: I’m a fool, not an idiot. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin)

Courtney: Just a quick reminder that I am, in fact, very cute. In case you forgot. (Source: Tumblr) (Courtney Anderson)

Kiera: Who is the clingiest one? Morgan, curled up in Lydia's lap with her arms wrapped around her: Lydia is, obviously. (Source: Tumblr) (Kiera Bernhardt, Morgan Urquhart)

Jonas, wrapped in a blanket: smiling Donna: Usagi, it's time to get going. Jonas: LEAVE ME AND MY NEST IN PEACE! (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Donna Corbin)

Jonas: Head not empty, head full of countless scenarios that will never happen. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin)

Nate: I was thinking in the shower: if 666 is evil, then 25.806975801127 is the root of all evil. Jonas: Do you have a calculator in your SHOWER? (Source: Tumblr) (Nate Kellerman, Jonas Corbin)

Lydia and Morgan: arrive at a hotel Receptionist: Two queens? Morgan: Yes. And we'll need a king size. (Source: Tumblr) (Lydia Renfrew, Morgan Urquhart)

Chloe: Hey, Nate, are you free on Friday? Like, around 8pm on Friday? Nate: Yeah? Chloe: What about you, Alicia? Alicia: Yeah, I am. Chloe: Great! Because I’m not. You two go out without me. Enjoy your date! Nate: … Alicia: … Alicia: Did she just- (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver, Nate Kellerman, Alicia Ramsey)

Brad: Did you know when you suddenly jerk awake when falling asleep, another version of you from a different timeline just died? Jonas: That fact fucked me up. Nate: It’s actually because your heart rate decreased so quickly that your brain jerks you awake to make sure you’re still alive. Jonas: I don't know which one is worse! (Source: Tumblr) (Brad Thompson, Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Connor: Hi, I'm Connor Urquhart. Mark: Hi, I'm bi. (Source: Tumblr) (Connor Urquhart, Mark Seaver)

Nick: does/says something extremely stupid Jared: I don't know him. Nick: HA! He's a liar! We’re actually brothers! (Source: Tumblr) (NIck Murphy, Jared Murphy)

Chloe: Who else is blossoming into a beautiful young woman with no chill? (Source: Tumblr) (Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: wrapped in three comforters I am the human taco. The beginning and the end of comfort. I am the couch potato, the king of sleepy, and the superhero of watching cartoons all day. Donna: You’ve been wrapped like that for eight hours. You sure you’re okay? Jonas: … Jonas: I’m stuck and I really need to pee… (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Donna Corbin)

Connor: Feel sorry for me but also fear me in the depths of your heart. (Source: Tumblr) (Connor Urquhart)

Jonas: in detention I've been in here so long I think I've lost my mind.Jonas: The days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months. Jonas: How long have I been in here now? Almost a year?Mrs. Kochan: No, it's been eight minutes. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Barbara Kochan)

Mia: Chloe has these insanely strong opinions on everything. Go on. Ask her a thing no one should have an opinion on. Brad: Chloe, what is the worst possible multiple of four? Chloe: Twelve, obviously. (Source: Tumblr) (Mia Thompson, Brad Thompson, Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: How loud would it be if all the cats on Earth meowed at once? Nate: The average cat meow is 65/75dB, above speaking volume but below shouting. There are an approximate 2 billion cats in the world. So, by that math, 130 to 150 dB, which is about 100 million jets all taking off at once. Chloe: Cat-astrophically loud. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman, Chloe Seaver)

Mark: Plankton built his computer wife so he's also the one who programmed her personality. Plankton made a wife who would belittle and mock him. Plankton has a humiliation fetish. Connor: Sometimes we have thoughts but we don't have to share them with everyone and put them out into the world. Just a suggestion. (Source: Tumblr) (Mark Seaver, Connor Urquhart)

Jonas: I am bisexual. Which means I love boys and Kiera Bernhardt. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin)

Jonas: If I wore a shirt inside out, the entire universe would be wearing the shirt except me. Nate: Congratulations, you just explained Gödel's theorem in a single sentence. Brad: from the distance NERD. (Source: Tumblr) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman, Brad Thompson)

Kiera: Jonas, please don’t put your feet on the table. Jonas: OK boomer. Kiera: … Kiera: WE’RE THE SAME AGE! (Source: Tumblr) (Kiera Bernhardt, Jonas Corbin)

Connor: When I get murdered, make sure it’s unsolved. Mark: What? Connor: I want to be on BuzzFeed Unsolved. Mark: Let’s go back to the “when I get murdered” part. (Source: Tumblr) (Connor Urquhart, Mark Seaver)

Lydia: If Morgan thinks she can just bat her cute eyes at me and get what she wants, she's right. (Source: Twitter) (Lydia Renfrew)

Jonas: That test was really hard. Brad: Yeah, the problems on the back were really hard. Jonas: The. WHAT. (Source: Twitter) (Jonas Corbin, Brad Thompson)

Nate: You know Orion's Belt? Waist of space. I know, I know, not a great joke. Nate: … Nate: Three stars. (Source: Twitter) (Nate Kellerman)

Donna: You forgot to turn the TV off last night. Jonas: flashback to him leaving it on so Leo could finish watching The Aristocats Jonas: No, I didn't. (Source: Twitter) (Donna Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: BTW it is totally possible to be a girlboss and a girlfailure at the same time because women are multifaceted and highly complex creatures. I am a living breathing example. (Source: Twitter) (Chloe Seaver)

Jonas: Hey, Chloe, nice shirt. Chloe: Thanks! Chloe: remembers that guys like bad girls I stole it- Chloe: remembers that guys like nice girls -from an old lady I was helping walk across the street. (Source: Twitter) (Jonas Corbin, Chloe Seaver)

Thom (to Connor): Oh, you smoke weed? How about you go weed a book. (Source: Twitter) (Thom Anderson)

Jonas: I need less stress and I need more fries. (Source: Twitter) (Jonas Corbin)

Jonas: What's the word for when hands are bisexual? Nate: You mean ambidextrous? Jonas: Yeah, that. (Source: Twitter) (Jonas Corbin, Nate Kellerman)

Jonas: Academics will say ‘put simply’ and say the most incomprehensible sentence you’ve ever read. (Source: Twitter) (Jonas Corbin)

Sarah: Why are you holding my hand? Morgan: I told you, I don't want to lose you in the crowd. Sarah: Morgan, we've been the only ones in the room for 15 minutes now. (Source: Twitter) (Sarah Reinholt, Morgan Urquhart)

Monica: I’m cooking dinner tonight. Jonas, shaking: Is that a threat? (Source: Twitter) (Monica Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Hannah: What’s the first thing you notice when a man approaches you? Lauren: The audacity. (Source: Twitter) (Hannah Brooks, Lauren Reinholt)

Mia: I got you a Valentine's card! hands Jonas a card Jonas: Oh, here's yours. gives Mia a piece of paper Mia: … this is a restraining order. (Source: Vine) (Mia Thompson, Jonas Corbin)

Valerie: Where's the box of cookies I just bought? Chloe: That's almost an accusatory tone, there's no- yeah, I ate the whole box 'cuz I have no self-control. (Source: Vine) (Valerie Seaver, Chloe Seaver)

Donna: Clean your room, Jonas! We've got guests coming over! Jonas: Oh I'm sorry! I DIDN'T REALIZE WE WERE ALL GATHERING IN MY FUCKING ROOM! (Source: Vine) (Donna Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Jonas: I’m supposed to be having a great summer…but I can’t get out of bed. This is comfortable. (Source: Vine) (Jonas Corbin)

Chloe: God, sometimes Mia makes me so angry! Kiera: You’re hugging her. Chloe: ANGRILY. (Source: Vine) (Chloe Seaver, Kiera Bernhardt)

Mark: screams Nick: screams louder to assert dominance Jonas: Should we do something? Chloe, observing: No, I want to see who wins this. (Source: Incorrect Quotes Generator) (Mark Seaver, Nick Murphy, Jonas Corbin, Chloe Seaver)

Donna: Hey Jonas, could you go to the store and get a carton of milk? If they have avocados, get six. Jonas, coming back from the store with six cartons of milk: They had avocados. (Source: Unknown) (Donna Corbin, Jonas Corbin)

Connor: I hate being this high. Why do I keep hearing footsteps? Mark: Are you walking? Connor: Oh, fuck. (Source: Unknown) (Connor Urquhart, Mark Seaver)

Sometime before he left for UNH, Adrian drops Kiera and Chloe off somewhere Adrian: Have fun! I'll just be here listening to my tunes. Adrian: turns on the radio and heavy metal screaming can be heard Adrian: :) (Source: Monsters University) (Adrian Bernhardt)

Adrian, at his desk: I have to study. Karin, on his lap with her arms wrapped around him, unmoving: Sucks to be you, I guess. (Source: Tumblr) (Adrian Bernhardt, Karin Michaux)

Justin (writing a letter): Dear Newspaper Editor, Every Sunday morning my father enjoys sharing with us the jokes in his favorite comic strips. He's getting up there in years, and his eyesight isn't what it used to be. I suspect that if your comics were printed much smaller, he wouldn't be able to read them. John: …So then the golfer says to his wife… Justin: Please print your comics much smaller. (Source: FoxTrot) (Justin Seaver, John Seaver)

Shea: If you're twins, does that mean you think alike? Evan and Tyler (in unison): No, don't be ridiculous. (Source: South Park) (Shea Renfrew, Evan Rockwell, Tyler Rockwell)

Samantha: Can I have some candy? Monica: You know the rules. Samantha: No candy before dinner? Monica: No, those are daddy's rules. My rules are that you bring me one, too. (Source: Tumblr) (Samantha Corbin, Monica Corbin)

Donna: Go out and make someone's day. Every day you make mine by being my son. (Source: Chrono Trigger: The Musical) (Donna Corbin)

Dorothy: Mia, go easy on the orange juice. That stuff doesn't grow on trees- Dorothy: - wait, it does. So why is it so darn expensive? (Source: Malcolm in the Middle) (Dorothy Thompson)

Donna: My son's bisexual, and as much as he loves me, he'd disown me without a second thought if I was any kind of queerphobic. I take that as a sign I raised him well. (Source: Tumblr) (Donna Corbin)

Monica: Hey, I have to ask you a question. Will you be my valentine? Richard: We're married. Monica: But will you? Richard: Of course I will, Monica. (Source: Tumblr) (Monica Corbin, Richard Corbin)

Richard: The most important thing I’ve learned from being married to Monica is: Whenever I stop at the gas station, I have to get her a snack. If I think to myself “Maybe she doesn’t want a snack,” I’m wrong. Just get the woman a snack. (Source: Twitter) (Richard Corbin)

BTW, from now on all new incorrect JCGTL quotes will go in the Grand United File on Google Docs, so check it out from time to time!

[disneydarlin]

The Disney Princesses as Modernized People

For a little over a decade, some classic Disney Princesses have been put on graphic t-shirts as modernized people. However, these designed the royals in gothic and punk styled people. These designs don’t fit the princesses characters or their aesthetics. Due to this, an artist named Daria Artemieva reimagined all the princesses in modern day looks.

1. Snow White: Looking at the live background with the cartoon drawing of Disney’s first princess, Snow White lives in a studio apartment. Specifically, she lives a minimalist life-style judging by the simple furniture and few décor items featured in the picture. With an apple phone in her hand, Snow White might run her own blog. Of course, this would be a hobby on the side compared to her job. Perhaps Snow White manages her own bakery titled “The Apple Pie”. After all, she’s an excitant cook, cleaner and baker!

2. Cinderella: This is the only artwork not from Daria Artemieva. Instead, this image is from a fashion blog of some kind by an unknown artist. The look captures Cinderella’s feminine style with white jeans in case she still has to rush off somewhere. In the picture, Cinderella is holding what appears to be a fashion shoe magazine or catalogue. Perhaps Cinderella could manage her own shoe store called, “The Glass Slipper”, as a career.

3. Aurora: Many fans of the Sleeping Beauty fairy tale know sleeping is a big part of Aurora’s story, but it doesn’t define her as a person. It would have been nice to see this princess dressed in a casual day look instead of pajamas. Despite this, Aurora still appears to love singing. Perhaps this princess’ chosen job in the modern world is a music artist. Aurora could be waking up late in the afternoon after a long night of singing on stage and is having breakfast in bed to celebrate a successful performance.

4. Belle: Unlike the majority of the princesses, Belle could have a couple of different jobs to fit her passions in life. Since Belle loves to read more than anything, its an obvious decision for this lady to own a little book shop next to an outdoor café in Paris. If not, Belle could own a little flower shop. Her hobby could be writing. Considering Belle is standing against a California background, she could currently be on vacation looking for “adventure” by touring other book shops after stopping by a café for a drink.

5. Ariel: Here is the second artwork to feature a princess against a California background. However, it fits Ariel perfectly. The previous mermaid is living in California by the sea in a beach house. Ariel must have been recently transformed into a human by her father because her pants look exactly like her birth fin. Considering Ariel doesn’t seem to be living a luxurious life, perhaps she often travels for work and fun to follow her dream of “exploring the world above”. This way, Ariel can still collect things as a hobby while continuing her joyous love of learning.

6. Jasmine: Although Jasmine is supposed to be from Arab, it seems the background picture matches a white building in Morocco instead. Regardless, Jasmine could be managing her own yoga and fitness studio as a career. This seems like a good fit for her as Jasmine showed to be a bit skilled at gymnastics in the film. Plus, the Magic Carpet has volunteered to be the princess’ personal yoga mat as a supportive friend.

7. Pocahontas: As a Native American, Pocahontas can easily adapt into the modern Hippie culture from the country. The Indian is a “free spirit” as she follows the wind. In this artwork, the winds lead Pocahontas to Coachella. The event is a trendy music festival which comes around during Spring in Indigo, California. Perhaps, when she’s not traveling, Pocahontas could enjoy selling jewelry she creates in honor of her mother and their culture.

8: Tiana: The determined and hard-working woman still followed her original ambition of pursues her dream as an entrepreneur. As such, Tiana remains managing the “Tiana’s Place” restaurant. However, there’s more to this tuff girl’s life as she seems to enjoy keeping fit in her spare time. Perhaps Tiana enjoys going on early morning jogs in the foggy dawn of New Orleans.

9. Merida: It doesn’t make much sense for Merida to be in California. However, she could simply be visiting the location on her own personal adventure. Regardless, seeing the tomboy dressed in track clothes and a pair of tennis shoes is perfect for her. This is especially fitting if Merida has to exercise and train every day to earn her place in the Olympics as an archer. Of course, this could be a personal goal outside of running her own horse ranch back in Scotland.

10. Moana: In the modern world, Moana can still enjoy voyaging across the sea. She does this by sailing on her houseboat. Every now and then, Moana will make port on a beach to stop for a bite to eat. The adventurous woman can easily afford this extravagant life-style being an international champion surfer in Hawaii.

What do you think? Do you like Daria Artemieva’s artwork? If not, who do you think drew the princesses the best? please share with me!