#dae is in a crisis

[strawberryspence]

me: yes eddie is alive. he's not dead until i see that body.

also me: dead. i don't even know who that man is. let me write another mcd to add unto my very tall pile of dead eddie fics.

don’t appreciate that everyone is saying eddie is dead???? I thought we were all in a mass agreement that he’s alive and therefore making our own reality???? I can’t hold these fictional walls up myself guys come on

[ifthestarsarewilling]

crisis time let's fucking gooo

[mswyrr]

They spent the entire season showing the collapse of everything Alicent had invested meaning in and earning her final choice.

Things that came apart over the season:

-her father's role in all this; his approval (and fear of his disapproval) has driven her for her entire life! (bad move on multiple fronts, Aegon)

-her belief that she could do what this patriarchy promises and "influence" her sons toward a good direction (Aegon dismisses her but Aemond really drove the nail in with flagrantly slaughtering smallfolk and making his intent to force his sister to do it too clear)

-her belief that she had any allies and her skills in leadership and her track record of hard work actually meant anything to *anyone* (this was a cooperative effort by Aemond, Larys, and Criston - good work, fellas!)

-her belief that she could, if nothing else, at least protect her daughter (huge emotional pillar for her)

And if we look at her prior actions putting Aegon on the throne and protecting him with her life - both fit within those structures she had mentally and emotionally which this season ripped down.

I think the final one was the thing that took it over the edge, though -- the prospect of Helaena being used and hurt and destroyed as a person -- kind of like how degrading Aemond and his connection to his long-term sex worker was his final straw that made him want to kill and supplant his brother Aegon.

People keep pushing each other too far this season. Taking out the last thing that stands between them and a radical change. Pushing people until they're willing to lose things just to break the current dynamic.

Dae/mon pushes Rhaenyra too far, then the entire war does and she "breaks bad" in 2x07 (see my meta linked below for more on my pov on that); Aegon pushes Aemond too far; and the entire group of "green men" systematically pushes Alicent too far.

All the while, she had that offer from earlier in the season, when Rhaenyra risked everything to come speak to Alicent in her mind. She was mulling over it and thinking of what she could have said, should have said. At the same time, however, Rhaenyra was moving away from being that person [my meta argument on that here]. So the person she finally comes to make peace with isn't the same as she was in the Sept. And once again they tragically can't get on the same page. It does all fit together, even with issues in the writing.

And writing on Alicent's arc simply isn't as uneven as people are saying - the theme of people pushing each other too far and how they showed the pillars of Alicent's support crumbling were both clearly done.

And, yes - Alicent still has feelings for Rhaenyra and as all of this has been happening she's been having a midlife crisis and wishing she had just run away with her first love when they were girls. But that isn't her sole motivation!! It's just what comes spilling out of her because of the state she's in. It creates an appealing alternative to the hell she's living in at the Red Keep. But it wasn't THE single motivating factor.

On a show where fathers have behaved truly monstrously--up to and including their selfishness setting this civil war in motion to begin with--it's fascinating that people refuse to believe a mother can be pushed too far. That kinslaying and slaughtering whole cities and rejecting and humiliating her and threatening to mentally torture her daughter until she breaks wouldn't change her mind about her priorities.

The "green" side becomes owned by Aemond, a wilful (as far as she knows; I'm speaking of her pov here) kinslayer moral reprobate who is violent to his sister and wants to force her to do things that will break her mind. Alicent cannot expect that Aegon will be able to stop him. That's what the side is now, as far as she knows. And she thinks he's a monster who must be stopped, at any cost. That's why she told Rhaenyra "we both know what he is" about Aemond in the Sept. WHAT not who. Things like kinslaying and slaughtering smallfolk mean something to her. And her daughter is everything to her.

Team Green overall took her for granted and thought she'd always be their doormat, and Helaena too. And Alicent finally had enough. Again, given how monstrously the fathers on this show behave, I think they "showed their work" on her radical change of heart well. It's just some people believe nothing can ever justify a mother betraying her sons and I think that makes total sense, given everything.

Honestly, once Helaena was on the chopping block, it would have been out of character for Alicent *not* to do everything--destroy anything--to protect her daughter. She feels like protecting Helaena is the only good thing she's ever done in her life.

People can dislike the ending. It's always valid to dislike something in a story, it's fine. But disliking it doesn't mean it wasn't built up solidly, narratively speaking. The writers put a lot of work and narrative space into it, actually--this was one of the most developed parts of s2!--and weaving it into the season's larger theme of characters pushing each other to the breaking point.

[mariamakeslemons]

Kinktober 2024: Day 4 Watersports

Warning: more fluff than actual sex, mentions of past bad relationship, and of course mention of watersports (I know people are squicked by it, please pass if you don't like it)

The food on your fork drops back to the plate, but you don’t really notice. You did, however, look around the table and take note of the others’ reactions. Simon had paused before sipping his drink, Kyle is staring at his plate blankly, and Price curses as some of his own drink drips onto his shirt.

“Could you repeat that?” you ask after a pause.

“Ah wanna try watersports,” Johnny repeats, a look of determination being undermined by the red creeping up his cheeks. You open your mouth to say… something, before snapping it closed and dropping your head with a sigh.

“Bad timing, Johnny,” Simon gently scolds, although he sounds a little amused. Johnny sticks his tongue out at Simon while Price wipes off his chest and Kyle seems to snap out of his existential crisis.

“Why?” Kyle whines and you wince. You remember on a solo date with Kyle, how he told you about trying watersports with a previous partner and ended up stinking because they refused to go a day drinking just water, despite him asking. Of course, he dumped that partner immediately after, but it also put him off watersports.

“Ah wanna be owned,” Johnny explains carefully, obviously having thought this through, “Ah’m nae gonna hev ye dae it, ‘f ye daen’ wanna. Bu’, ah’ve bin thinkin’ boot ‘is fer a while.” Kyle immediately relaxes, nodding and smiling a little.

“Well, don’t look at me, bruv,” he says, “That’s one that I won’t do ‘gain.”

“Fair,” Johnny accepts, before shyly turning to you and the other two men, “Anyone else?”

“‘M in,” Simon growls, “Wouln’t mind showin’ you yer place, Pup.” Johnny shivers, his pupils blowing out wide as they turn to you and John.

“Not one for pissin’ on people,” John decides after a minute, “But I wouldn’t mind watchin’.”

“I’m not a pee-er,” you declare, “Tried it with a past partner, and it was just okay. Not good enough for me to seek it out, but…”

“Unenthusiastic consent,” Kyle pipes in, obviously remembering your own story with watersports. While better than his, it led you to decide that watersports isn’t a squick, it’s just not something you like preforming on people and you’re okay with someone doing it on you.

“Basically,” you admit. Johnny nods, pouting a little at no one else wanted to do it too him. However, Simon takes a long drink of water before grinning,

“Finish yer food, Pup,” he rumbles, “We’re showerin’ after.”  Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise at how quickly Simon is on board, after having to talk him through a basic bondage session that wasn’t even using ropes. But, with how eager Johnny shovels food into his mouth and how John is adjusting himself…

“Hey, Kyle,” you say, “Wanna see how many episodes we can watch before they’re done?”

“Hell, yeah,” Kyle agrees with a grin, taking his time to finish his own meal. You hum, accepting the rain of kisses you and Kyle get from the other three men before they disappear into the bathroom.

“You got a show in mind?” you ask, picking up your empty plate and taking Kyle’s as well.

“Not yet, Love,” he admits, “But I’ll have something when you return.” You kiss him on the cheek and clean off the table, dropping the dishes into the dishwasher after scraping off the few food bits that clung stubbornly to the plates. Returning to the room, you laugh at the image of Alton Brown holding up a suitcase full of money.

“Oh boy,” you giggle, dropping onto the couch to cuddle against Kyle. He chuckles and presses play, the two of you relaxing as you wait for the others to return.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Four episodes finish before Johnny stumbles out of the bathroom, wearing a fluffy robe and his mohawk fluffing from the towel running over it.

“Hug?” he asks, so far in Sub space that he can only say one-word sentences. Immediately, you and Kyle shift on the couch and welcome the freshly showered Scot.

“John’s asserting his dominance on Simon?” you ask, petting at his soft hair. Johnny nods into Kyle’s chest, reaching back blindly to try tugging you onto him. With a huff, you follow, laying on Johnny, who’s laying on Kyle. The “sub” sandwich, as Simon likes to joke, as if he isn’t part of a “sub” when John’s around.

“They’ll be a bit,” Kyle hums, looking down at Johnny, “Good scene, Soap?” Again, Johnny nods, with a happy hum as he presses a kiss to Kyle’s chest. You both laugh softly before settling back in for more mindless telly, waiting for John and Simon to finish their personal shower.

[navree]

ooh, pls expand on your dae/jae/aeg3 ideas! 😃😃😃

This is what happens when I wake up at 3am due to stubbornly persisting jetlag (pro tip, if you're gonna go to a country that's, like, sixteen hours ahead of your's, just block off a solid week of not doing anything when you get back because your sleep is gonna be FUCKED, my European jetlag has never been this longlasting or this bad), I create Ideas in my head and then use them to help me fall asleep. And it's honestly highly likely I'm actually gonna write something with this, it's quickly moved really high in my ASOIAF fics priorities list, just behind my Dance AU (I really should also write my version of Aegon's Conquest but it would just be so fucking looooooooooong and fall quarter is about to start for me at school anyway).

So, unlike most Greens, I actually quite like Daenaera, sue me, sometimes character are just Your Baby, and she's mine (I've enumerated why here for the curious). But I do understand the narrative issues some people have with killing off Jaehaera to make room for her, so I'm merging the best of both worlds here. A lot of the same things I talk about when it comes to why I like Daenaera's relationship with Aegon can also be applied to Jaehaera, she's also someone who likely would have felt lonely and isolated and deeply depressed after all she went through, and there likely wouldn't be many people she could try and connect with. There's Gaemon, her bastard half-brother, and there's Aegon. But can Jaehaera really bring herself to connect with him, or he with her? Aegon's father sent men to murder Jaehaera's twin and threaten to rape her; Jaehaera's father not only kept Aegon a prisoner but also made him watch his mother's execution via being eaten by a dragon. That's a huge emotional gulf for two children to overcome on their own, and that's where Daenaera comes in. Kids need socialization with other kids, we know this, and given that Daenaera becomes a ward of Aegon's half-sister Baela, her visits to King's Landing to see her brother often include bringing her young charge (I'm also reducing the age difference between Aegon/Jaehaera and Daenaera, because it is rightly weird as Hell that so much emphasis was put on six year old Daenaera being the hottest preschooler in Westeros). She socializes with both Aegon and Jaehaera, since she's on a similar social level, given not just the closeness between the Velaryons and the Targaryens, but her being kind of a member of Baela's family, and thus technically the royal family by extension. And Jaehaera is queen, so it's not unreasonable for someone to go "OK she needs some noble female companions" to allow her and Daenaera to hang out more.

In my head, the first closeness happens between Jaehaera and Daenaera, and not only as a meta-rebuttal to fandom weirdos who wanna pit two little girls against each other like it's One Tree Hill because you've all got big feelings over a fictional succession crisis. But I think Jaehaera would be more openly receptive to friends than Aegon. I mentioned it in my above linked post about Daenaera, but Aegon's one friend in his minority was Gaemon, and he had to be very careful about that friendship because of how Gaemon could be treated, so he was probably recalcitrant from getting close to anyone, along with his other issues. Jaehaera doesn't have that hangup, she's just a lonely girl without any friends, so having someone who's canonically sweet and charismatic enough that her sunny disposition uplifted the people around her would definitely help her out, and make her appreciate Daenaera as a person and want her around. It'd be almost something similar to what HOTD has between Rhaenyra and Alicent, close female companions bordering on homoeroticism and sapphic first loves.

On the Aegon front, a lot of what I talked about when talking about their canonical relationship can also apply here even before a marriage. Aegon's two main relationships to people his age are Gaemon, with the issues mentioned above, and Jaehaera, which does come with its own issues from the Dance. Daenaera would still be the first major guilt-free relationship in his life, someone he can interact with and be close to without feeling the burden of his own sins or the ones of those close to him on his shoulders. And again, along with that same temperament that endeared him to her in canon, and would endear her to Jaehaera in this AU, that's how they draw close and forge their own independent friendship. On all three sides though, it would likely be restrained to something like courtly love, where you can have concretely romantic feelings and even certain minor expressions of those feelings, but you can't ever really do anything, you just pine and have unspoken thoughts about everything. Aegon and Jaehaera are married, to each other, and they're also still growing, considering they get married when they're ten, so even if they grow closer and start communicating about shared desires more, it's still gonna take some time to parse out what it is they feel and what they want. Similarly, Daenaera would also need the time to grow and realize what she wants as well, and what her feelings even are, given that she's also young. And while I've talked about how Aegon and Jaehaera would grow closer to her, even beyond Daenaera being a naturally friendly person, there is something for her in those relationships as well. Companionship with people her age, for one, and a more calming presence from two people who do seem pretty even keeled, if melancholic, after the chaos of her own early life, and a measure of stability after going from two parents to just a father to orphaned to living with Baela.

One thing that would, in my view, firmly solidify the idea that Aegon and Jaehaera like having Daenaera in their lives and want to keep Daenaera in their lives is the secret siege. In canon, Daenaera nearly dies because of the poisoned fruit tarts, it's only because maesters give her something to make her throw up before the poison gets too much ingested into her system that it doesn't, unlike what happened to poor Gaemon. In my head, there's a period of time, probably a couple hours but still, where it's verrrrrrry touch and go for Daenaera and both Aegon and Jaehaera are really worried about her. Because they know death, they've seen death, not only have a lot of their family members died but they have personally witnessed someone not just die but be killed, be murdered. They know what it looks like and they both realize that they don't want that to happen to Daenaera, that she's important to them. After all, when I said "aegon and jaehaera and daenaera as the conquerors reborn", I wasn't just being facetious. I've mentioned in a lot of my Conquerors meta that Rhaenys appears to have been the glue that held her and her siblings together, and I can see Daenaera occupying a similar role. Like Aegon I and Visenya before them, Aegon III and Jaehaera are likely people who would be reticent in expressing emotion, though for different reasons (trauma vs just inherent personality), whereas Daenaera is not. And having kids socialize with someone like that, and learn to socialize with other people, including each other, like that, it's important, and it makes Daenaera important to them, along with the personal feelings that might become involved, especially with them all maturing emotionally and sexually at the same time. Post-secret siege is when I think things would take a concrete turn to the romantic, and given that the most successful Targaryens of all time were very famously in a polygamous marriage, that's when a plan can start forming about bringing Daenaera into the marriage, not unlike Rhaenys getting brought into Aegon and Visenya's marriage.

(though, unlike my headcanon where Aegon and Visenya never wanted each other romantically or sexually due in part to incompatibilities as Visenya was a lesbian, and they both wanted Rhaenys, all three participants in this poly couple would want each other. I think that Aegon and Jaehaera might like Daenaera individually more than they might like each other, cuz again there's a lot of baggage involved, but there's romantic attachment and sexual interest, though to varying degrees, from all parties to all parties)

A marriage including Daenaera also helps deal with the unseen faction of the Dance: the Velaryons. The Velaryons kinda got shafted by both sides in this war. The Blacks in general treated a lot of members of House Velaryon badly in the lead up (Daenaera's grandfather, again, is Vaemond Velaryon. That Vaemond Velaryon), along with Rhaenyra imprisoning and threatening the House head, Corlys, over her own neuroses. The Greens, meanwhile, not only kept a member of House Velaryon as a prisoner (Baela, who is also the current king's sister), but are responsible for the death of a member of House Velaryon through marriage, since Aegon and Aemond killed Rhaenys (fuck you HBO for ruining that team up, sorry I'm done now). The toll of the war on House Velaryon was pretty severe, with wrongs done by both sides, and there does need to be some element of House Targaryen going "my bad" and offering some kind of recompense, especially considering the ways House Velaryon helped both sides with the allegiance switch (also, if we're moving up Daenaera's age, you can have her father be a casualty of the Dance, rather than the Daughter's War). Having a Velaryon at the table, given a prominent seat at the table, can definitely be that, especially someone who is historically pureblood Velaryon, without major Targaryen ancestry who can clearly advocate for House Velaryon. So if the two Targaryen monarchs go "we want this Velaryon as our queen", that can work from a political perspective and allow the match to go forward.

And if we keep the dragons around, which I want to, because I like dragons, that's something that can also connect Daenaera and Jaehaera. Say Morghul never dies in the storming of the Dragonpit, now Jaehaera has a dragon, and we know Daenaera loves dragons, whereas Aegon can't stand them (reasonable, given what happened to Rhaenyra). So Jaehaera can't bond with Aegon about dragons, but she can bond with Daenaera, who'd be very interested in hearing everything about it. If Daenaera wanted to claim a dragon herself, and we know she expressed the desire to have one after seeing Rhaena and Morning in canon, Jaehaera could be the one to help and facilitate that. Not to mention, I put in a response to someone asking who might Sunfyre have allowed to be his rider if he survived Dragonstone (can't find it for the life of me tho, sorry!) that Daenaera was a likely candidate, given that they're both pretty sweethearts. So if I get to be self indulgent and have Sunfyre survive for a bit, Daenaera can connect with him and Jaehaera can have some link to her deceased father, Sunfyre's original rider.

So yeah, these are just a couple disjointed thoughts I had based on that idea, but in my head that's how it should be. I'm sure I'll think of more about them as actual proper adults and reigning monarchs, cuz right now a lot of this was childhood and teen years focused along with a spotlight more on how they got together than how the relationship unfolded into adulthood, but hope you enjoyed the expansion anon!

[lily-s-world]

Kitty went to Korea to feel closer with her mom and to finally be with Dae; and in return she came back from it with a sexuality crisis thanks to Yuri, expelled, bringing secrets of decades to the light, saddened from her break up with Dae and with MinHo in love with her.

I mean, mission failed successfully, but in an iconic way.

[youredreamingofroo]

📩 Simblr question of the day: Do you have a process for making your simblr posts?

answer in whatever way is most comfortable for you and feel free to share this SQOTD around, make sure to use the hashtag SQOTD and tag me in separate posts ~ 💛

This question was contributed by an anon !

oh brother everyone pull out the popcorn cuz im aboutta yap for a decade and a half

Here's Roos guide to making a youredreamingofroo post

Step 1, Be up at ungodly hours and have a sudden shock of inspiration for a render

Step 2, Write inspiration down for later

Step 3, Completely disregard "for later" and go boot up my laptop at aforementioned hours

Step 4, open up blender and throw in sim DAEs and start posing them

Step 4.5, use pinterest for pose inspo and/or spend 50 years trying to figure out how to do one thing that I wanna do but dont know how to do said thing (every explanation is explained like I should understand every inner machination of blender, which I obv dont understand) (optional)

Step 5, spend the entire time posing thinking of how I'm going to position the cameras and which chunk of dialogue will go where

Step 5.5, realize halfway through that the song I'm listening to actually fits the scene really well and so I end up listening to that song on repeat for however much longer I end up posing (Optional step)

Step 6, Set up the cameras, lighting and background, usually I don't have a scene in mind, so I just do my usual black background and colorful lighting

Step 7, have a crisis because it's 5 AM and I could've sworn it was 1 AM two seconds ago

Step 8, Render the finished products, which usually goes by fast cause I render in eevee but sometimes I do cycles (which takes fucking eons)

Step 8.5, get sick of the song I'm listening to on repeat (if step 5.5 occurred in the process)

Step 9, Throw them suckers into GIMP and edit them, by this point I'm usually tired and I'm not a huge edit-every-detail kinda guy, so editing is pretty easy, that being said, Clone tool+Heal tool are my best friends for renders cuz of hair clipping, general clipping and/or weird shadows, and I tend to edit everything to the very PIXEL (if you could see me edit, I actually do go pixel by pixel often), and then to top it off, sharpen that bad boy <:P

Step 10, Export them and go to tumblr and throw those pictures onto a post (For some reason, making the post save as a draft makes posting images a lot easier...) and wait for them to process (which takes eons cuz of my wifi), then go to patorjk for title coloring, add the title, and add whatever needs to be added under the cut (transcript, inspo, credits, etc)

Step 11, Schedule it for a few minutes later cuz why not (usually an even number like X:10 AM or X:30 AM etc etc lmao)

Step 12, Wait for it to post and schedule 3-4 TZRs (depending on when I post the renders is how I determine when to post a TZR, if I post something at 7, then I schedule TZRs for 12 PM, 6-7 PM and then 12 AM)

Step 13, profit 🤷‍♂️ (and by profit I mean profit in serotonin and pride)

[zeciex]

You a good way for Dae to let it slip about Alicole to Aemond its if he is telling her about Cole being judgmental about Aemond spending too much time with Dae instead of planning for war or Alicent expressing about his wife being brazen like her mother or trying to lecture him.

For only to Daenera to respond to him:

“They are the last people who should be instructing anyone in these matters….”

Aemond:

Aemond- “ what do you mean?”

Dae- “😳”

It would be so fucking funny if Daenera has been careful with her words around it--alluding to it but not enough to let him know, and then one day she just accidentally slips up and makes it obvious and she doesn't even realize while Aemond has an existential crisis

He'd 100% react that way lol

[whump-lover-and-reader]

Whump Fic:

‹Jung Eui Sung gets drugged at the bar›

Leverage Team starts what they think is just nother job, but… the person they're after turns out to be far more dangerous than they expected initially, and Jung Eui Sung learns that far too late.

Tags: one shot, whump, hurt/comfort, non-consesual touching, non-consensual drug use, date rape drug/roofies, attempted kidnapping, implied/referenced rape/non-con, unconsciousness, protective caretaker

Word count: 7,180

A/N: my first attempt of writing an original fanfic that is in canon universe. I hope it makes sense👍 it took me quite a lot of courage to post pls be nice

[Ao3 link]

 “This time,” said the team leader, Lee Tae Joon, looking at each member of his team at the briefing table, “we’re going to be a little more spread out than usual.”

Their new target’s name was Kim Dae Kyung. How the team had found him was a little bit different story than most of their cons.

A few days ago Tae Joon ran into his old classmate, a woman named Hye Soo. He remembered her as a wonderful, kind girl, and as an adult she hadn't changed. But one look at her and he could tell that she was not doing great.

“Let's find somewhere to sit down, and you can tell me everything,” he said. Tae Joon decided then and there he was going to do everything he could to help this woman.

They settled in a random little cafe, and Hye Soo shared her story.

Just a week ago she had everything. She was to marry a nice guy from whom she was having a baby, and just the mention of a baby touched Tae Joon’s heart, since he used to be a parent himself. But it turned out, that guy was only after her money. He stole everything from her, even her home.

“He gave me a week to find a new place to live,” she said, “and it's already up. Now I don't have anywhere to go!”

Tae Joon put a hand on her shoulder, but before he could say anything, she continued:

“But it's only a half of the story. As I was searching for a new house, I found this guy,” and at this point Tae Joon already could piece together the rest of the story, but he still let Hye Soo continue. “He had a small company with a few employees. He said they helped families in crisis. He promised new housing cheap and quick. I should've known it was too good to be true... But I was desperate. And he even showed me the apartment, and the documents, and everything, so I thought it might be safe.”

“He conned you.”

Hye Soo nodded, defeated. “When I went to the new apartment the next day, there were people living there. And they said they hadn't heard anything about it being sold to anyone, and even promised to call the police if I didn't leave.”

She then went quiet, and Tae Joon spoke with confidence.

“It’s settled then. We’re going to help you.”

“We?”

Tae Joon smirked. “I know a few people…”

***

Tae Joon graciously offered her to stay at his place while he himself crashed at the headquarters. Not the most ideal solution, but it was only temporarily, until they dealt with the dirtbags accordingly.

After that he introduced Hye Soo to the team, and together they planned out their course of action.

First of all, Soo Kyung and Tae Joon posed as a married couple that were expecting a child in the future and were in desperate need of a new home to get the scammers' attention. They threw the bait and waited until they could meet the agents of this "company".

After that they had to figure out how to get the leader of the company, a man named Kim Dae Kyung. They decided to get more evidence of his crimes and hand him over to the police, which was the least risky and the most effective way of doing away with him. That meant going through his personal belongings and probably blackmail.

But getting the much needed information was so much harder considering their target was a literal hermit. The only times you could catch him outside his house were when he would meet his new clients or unwind in a bar.

Which had brought them to this moment.

“What do you mean spread out?” Eui Sung asked.

“Since it's so hard to catch the right moment, we have to act as quickly as possible. And that means... everyone will have to play their part at the same time, but we'll all be in different locations.”

He then explained that he and Soo Kyung would have a meeting with the agents of the company, allowing the other three to go after the head, Kim Dae Kyung.

“Na Byeol, you will search his house. Find anything and everything that could incriminate him,” he said, and Na Byeol nodded. “Our target only goes out to the bar for a short break, so you’ll have limited time. And that’s where you,” he pointed at Eui Sung, “will play your part. You will have to go in and distract him as long as you can.”

“Me? Wait, what do you want me to do?”

“You’re going to be just another customer who decided to strike up a conversation. Talk to him, stall him, prevent him from going home as long as you can to give Na Byeol time.”

For some reason Eui Sung’s palms started to sweat.

The thought of having to spend one-on-one time with their target, especially after the last time he was forced to be on his own with their targets involuntarily came to mind, of course, didn’t bring him any comfort. His strengths were technology and surveillance, backing his team up from afar, opening all doors for them, only occasionally providing help as minor characters. Not directly interacting with the target, especially when he didn’t have his teammates right behind him.

“W-wait, why me? Why not Roy?” he pointed at the other man. “Surely he fits better. He has more, uhh… natural charisma?”

Roy quirked an eyebrow at that, and Soo Kyung giggled quietly.

“Because you are generally more, you know, amiable looking. Let’s just say I think it would be better if Dae Kyung was approached by someone… less intimidating,” Tae Joon said.

Eui Sung made a confused face, and Na Byeol laughed out loud. He then realized that the insinuation here was that he was just naturally giving off an impression of someone who couldn’t stand up for himself, and he was slightly offended.

“Hey, I can be intimidating!” he pouted.

“The only thing you can intimidate is maybe your breakfast,” Na Byeol smirked and high fived Roy, which has only brought Eui Sung more annoyance at his situation.

“Besides,” Tae Joon continued, not paying their bickering any mind, “Roy will have a different mission. He’ll be the one driving you both to your respected locations and back. Since Dae Kyung’s house is in a very closed off neighborhood, others might get very suspicious of a van waiting around. So instead Roy will wait under the bar and only pick up Na Byeol when she’s ready.”

“So, he’s going to be nearby?” Eui Sung asked, perhaps with a little more enthusiasm than he wished to reveal.

“What are you so worried about, Hacker?” Roy suddenly asked.

“Well, you know… Who knows what could happen…” he thought back to last time, when after he was done with his part and still got got.

“You get to just relax at a bar, what could there possibly be to be scared about?”

Eui Sung didn’t know what to answer. What was he scared about? There was nothing concrete, he just had a bad feeling, but he already had bad feelings most of the time, so he said nothing. He hated to admit it, but he was acting unreasonably in that situation. He really had nothing to complain about.

Roy, on the other hand, was surprised at the lack of a response from Eui Sung. His question was meant as a teasing, but he realized that the other must be genuinely worried, so he decided to lay off for now. Later he would regret his words said in that particular moment. He should’ve listened to his worries, probably should’ve offered to switch places, since he understood very well that the jokes about Eui Sung’s helplessness weren’t particularly unfounded. But at the time it didn’t seem too important, and they were much more concerned with preparing Tae Joon and Soo Kyung for their performance than anything else. So this conversation was long forgotten.

-линия перерыва-

All too quickly came the evening to put their plan into action.

Tae Joon and Soo Kyung had already left, and Roy had already dropped Na Byeol off at the target’s house and was on his way to the bar to leave Eui Sung to do his thing.

He stopped the van in front of the entrance to the bar, and Eui Sung stood up to reluctantly exit.

“You’re going to be outside, right?” he asked Roy.

“Yes, I’m going to be here, at least until Na Byeol finds the safe,” he heard Roy’s firm voice in his left ear. “But the trip there and back only takes fifteen minutes, you will be fine.”

Indeed, they had calculated that the road from the bar to Dae Kyung’s house and back only took about fifteen minutes. But that did not mean absolute security.

Eui Sung really wanted to object that actually so many things could go wrong in fifteen minutes, but then he decided that he should stay silent to save last bits of his dignity in front of Roy. After all, excluding Roy, he got the easiest job of them all, only having to sit and talk for a while, not even playing any particular role.

“Now hurry,” Roy said, “before our target decides to go home.”

Eui Sung nodded resolutely. “Yes, sir.”

He was determined to do his absolute best and not let anyone down. But when he entered the building his confidence instantly faded. He spotted Dae Kyung right away, and at that moment it hit him that he was completely alone. And he would definitely be whining about it if others didn’t absolutely depend on him.

Instead he simply looked around. It was a small establishment with a few tables and a nice atmosphere. It wasn’t too crowded, and Eui Sung could definitely find himself a vacant table if he wanted to. But his destined seat was, of course, next to their target.

Dae Kyung was sitting at the bar counter sipping on a drink. Eui Sung took a deep breath and headed straight to him.

He plopped down on the stool two seats to the left of their target and ordered himself a glass of something light. He had absolutely no desire to get drunk that night. After about two minutes of sitting in silence and figuring out his next move he felt more than noticed the other’s eyes on him.

So Eui Sung got his attention without any effort straight away, great.

“Well, hello there, pretty guy.”

The voice and the words caught him completely off-guard, and made him nearly choke on his drink. He turned to Dae Kyung to make sure the man was talking to him.

“M-me?”

He heard Na Byeol snort in his ear. “Who's pretty? Is he talking to you?”

Dae Kyung laughed softly. “I'm sorry, it's probably not an inappropriate getting. I just couldn't help myself.”

“Ah… It's okay,” Eui Sung laughed it off awkwardly even though in reality he was immediately on edge without even realizing it. “Good evening to you too. My name's Park Man Young,” he introduced himself with a prepared name to move on from the awkwardness.

“Kim Dae Kyung.”

So now Eui Sung just had to bust out all the charm of his personality and get this guy into a conversation.

“So… Do you come here often?”

“Do I come here often? You could say that...” Dae Kyung said, and it was about the most cryptic answer Eui Sung ever heard. He didn’t even know what to say after that, but luckily, Dae Kyung continued: “Although tell me something. I've never seen you around.”

“Ah, right... I'm sort of new to this part of the city. I've moved in a few days ago. I just decided I should go out and meet some people.”

“I knew it.”

“Huh?”

“I knew I would remember someone as handsome as you,” Dae Kyung laughed again, and Eui Sung's cheeks flushed bright red. “You could sweep anyone off their feet, you know.”

“What the hell? Is he flirting with you or something? I can't listen to this,” he heard Na Byeol's voice.

“Hah! Who would've thought,” Roy chuckled. “You're in luck tonight, Hacker.”

Eui Sung started violently coughing to shut them up. “Stop saying nonsense!” he mumbled quietly so that only his teammates would hear him.

“Eh? Did you say something?”

“Nothing! Nothing. It's very nice to meet you, sir.”

He then thought he noticed something weird flicker in the target's eyes. But it only lasted a second, so Eui Sung wasn't sure he didn't imagine it.

“Hey,” Dae Kyung motioned to the bartender, “let my friend have some more, and put it on my tab.”

“Really? Thank you,” Eui Sung said, and Dae Kyung winked at him, which only made Eui Sung more uncomfortable. But nothing was too intolerable just yet.

In fact, Eui Sung felt pretty good about it so far: he managed to draw the attention of their target pretty effortlessly, and it looked like the man was pretty interested in this conversation, so if he kept this up he was sure he could buy Na Byeol all the time in the world to search his house upside-down. Not that he wanted to, since this guy was giving him the biggest creeps ever.

“Do you like this part of the city?” he asked to continue the conversation.

Dae Kyung hummed, thinking. “No, not particularly,” he said in the end.

“Why staying here, then?”

“I like the people here,” he replied. “They mind their own business, you know? I could be doing anything behind the doors of my home, and they wouldn't even care. They don't ask questions.”

Eui Sung suppressed the urge to ask what questions. He determined that he didn't really want to know the specifics. Surely he just meant his fake real estate company, what else could there be, right?

“What, you're not going to ask me what I mean?” Dae Kyung suddenly asked.

“What? U-um...” Eui Sung laughed nervously. “I figured since I'm gonna live here I'm not going to ask questions and mind my own business as well?” he offered. “Unless you want to tell me yourself, of course.”

Dae Kyung bared his teeth in a weird looking smile which could only be described as a wolfish grin of a predator right before it sunk its teeth into its prey.

“No,” Dae Kyung said, and after a somewhat ominous pause he added: “I have a feeling you'll find out soon enough anyway.”

Eui Sung would lie if he said he didn't feel slight chills run down his spine.

He felt his glass nearly slipping out of his hand because of sweat. He set it down on the table. It was empty already anyway.

Back in the van Roy scrunched his nose in irritation. Now this guy was just trying to intimidate Eui Sung to try and manipulate him in some way. And he could practically see Eui Sung's fluttering eyelashes and slightly open mouth as he loses his train of thought completely. If it was Roy out there, he wouldn't have even bat an eyelid at such a crude attempt to instill fear in someone. But it was Eui Sung they were talking about, and the prolonged silence on the other end of the earpiece was good enough indication.

“Hacker, remember who you're talking to. He's just a scammer, he's not going to do anything. Just ignore whatever he says and stay calm,” he spoke in hopes to calm his teammate down a little bit.

But Roy himself didn't believe his own words. He wasn't particularly worried, but if he had only been listening halfheartedly before, now he was definitely more alert. If he was being honest, this guy didn't sound like just a usual scammer, rather more sinister. And now he wished he did switch places with Eui Sung. But it was too late now, and he didn't want to throw their hacker into panic in fear of compromising their mission.

Hearing Roy's words in his ear both comforted and ticked Eui Sung off even more. He was glad to know Roy was still there and listening, so, in theory, he was safe. But he was annoyed because Roy could only hear, he didn't see Dae Kyung's creepy smile, his predatory eyes, couldn't smell his foul breath or feel the revolting warmth he was radiating that Eui Sung could sense even being one seat apart from him. So how could he tell him to stay calm?

“I see your glass is empty over there, little buddy,” he heard Dae Kyung’s voice. “Please,” the man turned to the barkeep, “a refill for my friend.”

The newly refilled glass landed in front of him, and snapped his attention back to the problem at hand. He briefly glanced at Dae Kyung and saw that the other was watching him, as if waiting for him to take a sip.

Eui Sung brought the glass to his lips, and saw Dae Kyung's smile widen ever so slightly.

“Why don't you tell me about yourself?” Dae Kyung then asked. “For example, what do you do for living?”

Eui Sung barely stopped himself from sighing in relief. Finally, a normal question.

Their further dialogue went pretty smoothly. Eui Sung fed him some wild stories about his made up life, and listened to Dae Kyung lie about his line of business as well.

“I work as a real estate agent,” he said, completely omitting the fact that he sold already occupied apartments and stole his clients' money.

“That's so cool!” Eui Sung replied. “Can you tell me more about it?”

“Of course, sweetheart,” Dae Kyung flashed him a smile, and once again Eui Sung's stomach twisted just the tiniest bit.

Back in the van Roy also found himself frowning. First time it was kind of funny, second time it was already getting old, but at that point this was starting to look more like a pattern, and Roy wasn’t liking it.

The talk went on for about ten more minutes, until something strange happened.

A loud bang and a sound of glass shattering made Eui Sung jump in his seat and turn his head sharply. At the far corner table an angry woman was storming off leaving behind a lost guy who looked just pathetic. She shouted at him so loudly that everyone in the bar could hear. Something about him cheating, and he could only miserably attempt to defend himself. Eui Sung hissed sympathetically. That guy was definitely having a terrible evening... But that wasn’t his problem. He turned back to their mark to find the other man smiling warmly.

“Has anybody ever told you you have pretty eyes?”

Eui Sung almost choked on his drink once more.

“W-what?”

“Absolutely gorgeous, I could definitely drown in them...”

“Uhhh...”

Eui Sung's skin crawled. Something about Dae Kyung's voice was different, but he couldn't figure out what, and that last comment made him want to run to the exit and ask Roy to drive away as fast as possible.

Dae Kyung moved just an inch closer to Eui Sung, who simultaneously backed away.

“Seriously, with those pretty eyes I bet you have a gorgeous smile as well. Don't you want to smile for me?”

Eui Sung swallowed thickly.

It seemed even Na Byeol understood there were no place for jokes anymore.

“Is this guy out of his mind? I feel gross even listening to him,” Na Byeol commented. “Is it safe for Eui Sung to be next to him?”

Eui Sung wanted to yell that yes, he was, in fact, feeling very unsafe right now, and let everyone know just what he thinks of this guy next to him. But on the outside he could only flash an awkward smile and do his best to hide his discomfort so as not to blow his cover. After all, everyone depended on him being able to stall as long as possible.

After a few more seconds Dae Kyung suddenly burst out laughing. “You should've seen your face! My little guy, I'm just messing with you, relax.”

“Oh,” Eui Sung breathed out. Suddenly he felt a dull headache forming behind his eyes. Was it the drinks, or the fact that he had been stressing out all evening?

“Eui Sung, just give me a sign, and we can abort this,” Roy said. “Clear your throat if you need help.”

But Eui Sung kept quiet. He wasn't about to ruin the con just because of a few weird comments or some messed up jokes. Even if he was freaking out real bad right now. He turned away from Dae Kyung for a second, and whispered: “I'm fine.”

“Okay. Na Byeol, how much longer?” Roy asked, and you could hear it in his voice he wasn't enjoying any of this either.

“I only have the living room to go through. I bet the safe is in here. I think you can start driving now.”

“Okay.”

Eui Sung both sighed with relief internally and freaked out even more. He was alone for real now, but it was just fifteen minutes. He had to endure this creep for just fifteen more minutes, and then he was done.

He asked for the third drink, just to calm his nerves, and prayed to whoever his anxiety didn't show on his face.

But just a few minutes later something else threatened to show on his face, and that was extreme discomfort he was starting to feel in the area of… pretty much his entire body. Not only his migraine had considerably worsened, but now his muscles also began somewhat aching and feeling numb. He blamed it on the exhaustion from tonight’s mission and also maybe his whimsical attempts to exercise earlier that week.

Then he tried to continue a conversation, and… to a certain amount of fear, he felt some difficulty forming his next line.

“How- how about you- you tell me...”

“Do you have any family?” Dae Kyung suddenly interrupted him.

“What?..”

“Like, is there anyone you live with? A girlfriend?”

“Well, no...”

“Really? How interesting...”

“You really should've said you have someone at home,” Roy said.

Eui Sung couldn't understand why.

“...huh?” he accidentally said out loud.

“What?” Dae Kyung asked.

“No, nothing.”

That headache of his was getting noticeably horrible. In addition, it was suddenly getting much harder to verbalize his thoughts correctly. He wanted to tell Dae Kyung that his family was none of his business, but his mouth just wouldn't cooperate.

“It's...The living... none...”

What was happening to him? Why was Dae Kyung suddenly smiling so predatory?

“What are you trying to say there, little guy?”

“How much did you drink?” Roy’s voice could be heard somewhere in the distance. It held almost a worried tone to it. “I’ve told you not to drink too much, damnit.”

Eui Sung really wanted to protest that no, he shouldn’t be drunk at all, he’s only had like three glasses… wait, then what was the case?

Suddenly Dae Kyung hopped from his own seat to the one right next to Eui Sung.

He put his own hand on Eui Sung's, and his heart made a leap. His first instinct was to immediately pull it away, but to his own horror he realized it wouldn't fully obey. He could only make a weak attempt to free his hand, but Dae Kyung grabbed it really tight.

Eui Sung's heart was pounding so hard it felt like it would break his ribs. That was enough, he was done. He had to tell Roy, he needed to... but his mouth just wouldn't listen...

He started to speak, but Dae Kyung quickly placed his hand over his mouth.

“Shh, you don't want to say anything wrong now,” he whispered.

***

Meanwhile Na Byeol was nearly jumping from joy, as she finally was able to lay her hands on their target's safe. Number combination and a padlock? Pshh, not a problem for her. She was done in under a minute.

But having opened it, she was disappointed to see there were no gold bars. And no money whatsoever in general.

“What a cheapskate,” she huffed. “Didn't even leave any money for me!”

“This is not what we're after. Look for documents,” Roy reminded her.

“Yeah, yeah...”

There was only a folder and a closed shoebox in the safe. She figured the folder must be where their target kept the documents and everything important, so the shoebox was what had really caught her attention.

“There's some weird box, I wonder what's in it,” she said and went to open it.

What she saw inside almost made her drop it.

There were pictures, a lot of pictures. As she flipped through them she wanted to puke more and more, and her eyes widened in horror.

“Roy, turn the car around,” she said, the tone of her voice having completely changed.

“What about you?” he asked.

“Forget me, you need to drive back and get Eui Sung out, now,” without a second thought he complied, turning the van around to drive back where he came from.

“Why? What did you find?” his voice was steady, but his stomach grew an uneasy feeling. Without noticing he pressed on the gas pedal to drive even faster.

“There are pictures of... of... people...”

“I got it.”

Na Byeol didn't need to continue for him to understand that those weren't pictures of cute puppies and butterflies that were kept in their target's safe. Suddenly it made sense why he spent so much time at the bar. It made him sick.

Next thing he realized he hadn't even heard any kind of complaint or protest from Eui Sung about the fact that they decided to pull the plug on his mission. It could be, of course, due to him not being able to speak next to someone, but still Roy couldn't help but feel even more anxious.

“Hacker, can you hear me?” no answer. “Clear your throat if you can hear me,” only silence in response once again. Roy cursed and punched the steering wheel.

“Is his earbud not working?” Na Byeol asked in a weak voice.

“It couldn't have broken on its own. It must've been found by Dae Kyung.”

Not to mention that Eui Sung turning it off voluntarily was out of the question. All of them know not to turn it off under any circumstances.

“Ah, what are we even going to do?” Na Byeol lamented. Panic was evident in her voice, but Roy couldn't have that.

“Na Byeol, focus on your own escape right now. Don't worry about Eui Sung, I'm going to go and get him.”

“Please hurry. He's there all alone now, no doubt scared out of his mind,” she said.

Roy bit his lip. He really couldn't bring himself to tell her that, considering who their target was, Eui Sung getting only scared would be the perfect outcome.

***

Dae Kyung cupped Eui Sung’s cheek with one hand and reached towards his ear with the other. Eui Sung wanted to scream at him not to touch him there, but his mouth might as well have been full of wool. He blinked, and the next moment he saw his earbud drown in the contents of the glass. Even through the thick fog in his brain he could understand that it was very, very bad. His one chance to call for help was gone.

He could only stare at it blankly, and Dae Kyung snickered, pinching Eui Sung's cheek.

“That's right, I knew about your little toy. I noticed it back when you turned around and exposed your left ear to me. Turns out, some other people have been listening in on our little date all this time. But no matter... Now we are finally truly alone.”

And if Eui Sung's muscles didn't feel completely numb at that moment, he would definitely shudder with his whole body. Suddenly Dae Kyung dropped what little had remained of his nice act, and his face distorted to that of a true maniac.

Next moment Eui Sung felt the last crumbs of strength leave him, a heavy hand landed on his shoulders, and his head dropped on the counter with a dull thud.

“Oh gosh, look at you. That last glass was definitely one too many, eh?” Dae Kyung purred. He then turned to the bartender with a toothy smile. “I apologize, my friend here had a bit too much. I always tell him, he should be more careful, and still...” The oblivious bartender smiled sympathetically, and Dae Kyung continued. “I parked my car at the back, let me take him away.”

Dae Kyung took Eui Sung and half led, half dragged him to the back entrance. Eui Sung wanted to resist, screamed at his body to move even a muscle, but it was all in vain. Nothing was working, and the world around was spinning so quickly that he couldn't even focus on one point. He was completely helpless. Oh Roy, where are you?

He felt the night air hit his skin. The car was close now. With each step they took Eui Sung felt more and more dread. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't even raise a finger to try and fight off. He knew he couldn't fight anyway, but this was on a whole another level. He was completely at the mercy of a sick and twisted pervert.

“There we are, little friend,” Dae Kyung said with a grin in his voice. “Almost there.”

Eui Sung wanted to cry. Please don't open that door, he begged inwardly, anything but this... Somebody help me...

Dae Kyung’s hand fell on the door handle, and Eui Sung's heart sunk… when suddenly he felt incredible lightness. Dae Kyung’s other hand that was supporting him was gone, and next second he found himself sitting on the ground with his back against the car.

Through rapidly blurring vision he only saw two dark silhouettes, and heard vague noises of someone fighting. For a minute he was only hearing rhythmic punches, and wondered what was going on.

After the hitting stopped, the silhouette moved towards him, and Eui Sung's heart picked up the pace again, when a face appeared in front of his eyes, and he could recognize...

Roy!

The relief hit Eui Sung immediately. Boy was he glad to see him! He could barely see straight, but even like that he was able to see Roy's eyes filled with worry. He felt wetness on his face, and right after that Roy's rough hand through his jacket's sleeve on his cheek. The other man had said something to him, but he couldn't hear. His consciousness was quickly slipping, and very soon the world around him submerged into darkness.

***

Two minutes earlier…

Roy practically tore the door off when he ran into the bar. He scanned the crowd, but couldn't find neither Dae Kyung nor Eui Sung. He sprinted to the counter and spoke to the man behind it.

“There were two people here. One in his thirties, and the younger one had blond hair and glasses,” he hastily explained. The bartender nodded in understanding.

“You missed them by just a minute. The blond guy got messed up, so his friend had to take him home.”

Roy's hair stood on ends.

“Where.”

“They exited through the back door. Maybe you'll catch them, if...”

But he didn't get to finish the sentence, as Roy was already gone.

Oh please, let me be on time.

In a flash he found himself outside and staring at the horrible scene: their target was dragging Eui Sung who couldn’t even stand upright towards his car ready to take off and do god knows what to him.

Roy saw red.

He ran up to Dae Kyung, and practically tore him off from Eui Sung. The latter then immediately lost his balance, slid down the car’s surface and just sat on the ground.

“Who the hell…” Dae Kyung began, but Roy didn’t let him finish. He punched him and knocked him down on the ground, and then proceeded to punch him again, and again, and again. He stopped only when he realized he was hearing some strange noise. Then he realized that it was Na Byeol’s voice calling his name.

“Roy! Roy! Can you hear me? What’s happening?!”

Dae Kyung was completely unconscious now, and even though Roy’s rage would only completely disappear if he killed the motherfucker, he reminded himself what was more important at that moment.

He rushed to Eui Sung, kneeling in front of him to check him over. Thankfully he didn’t find any injuries. Eui Sung’s glassy eyes stared somewhere through him, but he still saw some semblance of relief on his face. A tear ran down Eui Sung’s cheek, and it broke Roy’s heart. He went to wipe it with the sleeve of his jacket, so as not to get blood on Eui Sung’s face.

“I’m sorry for being so late. You’re safe now. Let’s get you home.”

After that Eui Sung’s eyes rolled back, and he lost consciousness, his head dropping to the side. Roy sighed and went to pick him up from the ground.

“Roy? How is Eui Sung?”

Roy looked at his load.

“I’m assuming he got roofied. He’s unconscious now. I’m taking him back to the van.”

Na Byeol was silent for a minute, likely processing that information.

“Okay… I’ve already texted Tae Joon and Soo Kyung, they’re coming back too.”

“Alright, meet you at the headquarters.”

***

Eui Sung woke up and immediately wished he hadn’t. He tried to sit up, but then groaned and clutched his head. Somehow that dull headache from yesterday still persisted even today, and was twice, if not three times as bad. Wait, yesterday? What even happened yesterday? A surge of panic went through him, and he attempted to get up again to assess the situation.

“I would advise you to lie back down,” he heard a voice. It was Roy. So Roy was here, huh. It instantly made things better, and he relaxed, feeling much safer.

He looked around the room as much as he could without turning his head too much and realized he was back at the headquarters. His body was covered with a warm blanket. He had no recollection of how he’d gotten here, or what had even happened after he’d gotten into the conversation with their target.

“How are you feeling?” Roy asked him.

A wave of nausea hit him, and he squeezed his eyes shut, a slight moan escaping his lips.

“Like shit,” he managed.

Roy hummed and squatted down next to him. Eui Sung flinched slightly from the sudden movement, but then he saw Roy was only handing him a glass of water.

“Better to stay hydrated,” he said plainly.

“Thanks,” he said, taking the glass. Roy helped him get up a little bit so that he could drink. Even that little movement made his stomach twist with nausea once more, and he nearly gagged. Roy laid him back down, and after waiting a few seconds until his stomach calmed down, he finally asked the question that had been bugging him since he’d woken up.

“What happened?”

“You got drugged and nearly kidnapped, then you passed out and I took you back to the base.”

“…oh.”

Memories came flooding back in. Images of events of the previous evening flashed before his eyes: Dae Kyung’s ugly smile, his hands on his face, the bar’s back door, the car…

All of it came back at once, threatening to completely overwhelm him. His heart picked up the pace, and suddenly it was harder and harder to breathe…

“Hacker?” Roy was right at his side instantly. “Hey, Jung Eui Sung. Just breathe, okay? It’s all over, you’re safe now.”

For a few seconds Eui Sung was simply breathing, in and out, until he was back in the present.  

“Sorry…” he swallowed hard and squeezed his eyes shut. “You must think I’m a total loser right now.”

“Not at all,” Roy replied. “You just went through something traumatic, it’s only natural to freak out.”

Eui Sung couldn’t find what to reply. He fully expected Roy to, well, maybe not mock him openly, but he still messed up where Roy would definitely never.

“I made a mistake…” he said. “I ruined the mission. I…”

Roy demonstratively sighed so loud that Eui Sung had to quiet down.

“You did not ruin anything, okay? And also, do you have any idea how that happened? At what point did he spike your drink, I mean.”

Eui Sung had to pause to think about it. He made sure to watch his glass at all times, even though he did not expect something like this, but there was one moment. If he had to guess then it would be…

“When some loud noise distracted me,” he started recalling. “A couple was having an argument, and the woman caused a scene. I turned away from Dae Kyung and from my drink for a moment because I got startled when she broke a glass.”

Roy closed his eyes and frowned. Eui Sung was already anticipating an earful, but instead all Roy said was:

“I see,” then, after a pause he continued. “So it was premeditated after all. He either was originally targeting someone else and switched to you, jumping at the opportunity, or planned for a random attack, and you were simply there at the wrong time. People like him would stop at nothing to get their way, so it would’ve happened no matter what, and it’s not your fault.”

“…Wow, okay. I don’t know if I’m supposed to feel better, or be in even more misery.”

Roy breathed out the faintest laugh.

“It’s your choice, Hacker.”

They heard the metal gate slide to the side and several footsteps go down the stairs to their headquarters.

“Jung Eui Sung!”

“Eui Sung-ah!”

It was Na Byeol together with Tae Joon and Soo Kyung. They saw that he was awake now, and rushed to his side. They wouldn’t have been able to do anything, but they simply had a strong need to make sure their teammate and friend was relatively okay. Obviously, he still felt the aftereffects of the drug, and was shaken to a great extent, but Roy was just in time to prevent something much more horrible from happening.

Their loud voices felt like someone was hitting Eui Sung’s head with a hammer. Against own desire, he flinched and quietly hissed.

Noticing that Roy has brought his finger to his lips, wordlessly telling everyone to mind their volume.

“Oh, sorry, sorry,” Soo Kyung whispered.

“How are you feeling?” Tae Joon asked, voice as soft and gentle as ever.

“Like shit,” he repeated his own words. “Okay, maybe just slightly better than when I’d woken up. My head’s killing me.”

“It’s gonna be like that for some time. I’m afraid you’ll have to get through it,” Roy said.

“How long?” Na Byeol turned to Roy with worried eyes.

“A day. Maybe two.”

Meanwhile Soo Kyung squatted next to Eui Sung and put her hand on his forehead. He leaned into her touch with gratefulness, as her cold hand felt medicinal to his devastating headache.

“What did we tell you, ah?” she murmured. “Be safe. Why didn’t you listen?”

“Sorry…” Eui Sung replied.

“Yeah, what did you do?” Na Byeol started.

“I got distracted, and he used the moment to spike my drink,” Eui Sung admitted to everyone.

“What?! How could you be so careless?”

“Na Byeol…” Tae Joon stopped her.

“It could be any of us,” Roy said. Everyone turned to him in question. “The couple were most likely his accomplices. It’s a classic scheme: some paid actors create a distraction and make the victim look away while the guy uses the moment to mix in the drug,” Eui Sung looked taken aback. He didn’t even consider the possibility that that wasn’t a coincidence. “Even if that didn’t work, no doubt they had a plan B, or even C. I’ve told you it’s not your fault.”

Soo Kyung gasped softly. “What rascals… Unbelievable.”

Eui Sung swallowed hard and then turned his eyes to Tae Joon. “What happened to Dae Kyung?”

“He’s at the police’s hands now. Drugging and kidnapping attempt is a completely different matter,” he said. “I’ve called detective Park right away, they’ve already searched their house. Turns out real estate fraud isn’t the worst of his crimes. They’ve found evidence of serial abduction and sexual assault, all documented with intent to blackmail the victims if they threaten to go to the police later.”

Eui Sung felt his throat close up just the smallest bit. That means if Roy hadn’t been there…

Soo Kyung ran her hand through his hair. “We’re just glad nothing too horrible happened,” she reassured, “and you’re safe now.”

You didn’t have to tell Eui Sung twice. The thought that something similar could happen to him made him physically shudder.

“What, do you need another blanket?” Na Byeol asked. And for the first time Eui Sung didn’t hear any sarcasm in her voice. It felt really weird.

“No…” he replied. “I’m just… a little freaked out I guess.”

“I know you don’t want to think about it right now, but you will need to give a statement to the police later when you’re better,” Tae Joon told Eui Sung Sung. “Would you be okay?”

Eui Sung pondered on it for a second. Right now all he wanted was to go back to sleep to forget about the whole thing and get rid of his horrible migraine. But they also needed to get that scumbag behind bars for as long as possible. So he gathered up his strength and nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Okay, that’s good,” Tae Joon patted him on the shoulder. “Now… I and Soo Kyung have to go for now, but we’ll leave Roy and Na Byeol with you.”

“Rest up, Eui Sung-ah,” Soo Kyung told him and slightly ruffled his hair.

After that they both left.

Eui Sung was already exhausted by this whole interaction. And it was probably very noticeable since both Na Byeol and Roy turned around to leave him alone.

“Don’t go,” he unconsciously called out to them.

“We aren’t going anywhere, we’ll be around the headquarters,” Roy told him. “I just could use a snack.”

“Yeah, Leader would have our heads if we left you.”

“Oh, okay,” at this point Eui Sung’s eyelids were lowering on their own. “Don’t do anything weird to my face while I sleep,” he murmured.

“It would be very funny,” Na Byeol said, “but now we’re just not in the mood.”

But Eui Sung couldn’t hear those words anymore, he had already dozed off. He slept mostly peacefully, knowing that his teammates and best friends would watch over him and would not let anything or anyone get to him.

[dxefillz]

I know this is crazy. But, I am alive. I have survived another flank of family crisis, dookie mental health, and the stress of the holidays. The battle was long, and hard. But, HERE I STAND YALL LMAO.

Now, I just know our threads are months in the past cause my ass decided to DISAPPEAR and fall off the face of the earth. But, I think cleaning house- and starting fresh would be ideal- and really helpful for me to get into dae's juices again.

If you are willing, my discord and dm's are open for plotting once I get caught up on the infinite lore.

[astralartefact]

Griff RoD Story Thoughts dae think war is bad maybe?

This write-up contains a whole lot of pseudo-deep complaining about the theme of Death as Salvation.

Content Warning for related Themes!

Okay, now that everything Griff-related is out I can finally say it:

I don't like Griff and a lot of his costumes look the same to me.

And I tried. Different from Rion and Dimos I actually tried and read all of his stories - which is why I'm writing this out today.

Not to say I can't find anything good in them - the End of his RoD story reminds me of one of the characters in the only book I ever read (Crime & Punishment) who commits suicide because without the eponymous Punishment for his eponymous Crime he couldn't find "Salvation" and therefore his only remaining option was Death to escape his guilt.

But there's only so much "Look at this 'normal' guy and what war did to him!" I can take before going numb and not listening anymore. You need to give me at least something else to latch onto. Like Lars has an existential crisis amount of shit going on that gives his story another layer about how exactly war is bad. Meanwhile Griff is just a guy who had a really fucked up thing happen that one time and he really can't get over it.

And sure. Maybe his stories are just about hammering down how PTSD works. Maybe it intentionally repeats Griff's one drop of guilt in the ocean that is war at nauseam. And maybe I'm just not keyed in to this type of historic fiction enough to understand the nuances. Maybe this is actually a very nuanced portrayal of the PTSD of sole survivors and I'm just not interested enough in this subject matter that I would know something like that.

But seeing as it ends in "the only thing that will save us from our guilt is death" I find that hard to believe. Not that there isn't value in showing the reality of veterans commiting suicide because of PTSD - but I don't think that's what's happening here.

I hate Death as Salvation as a trope. There is nothing valuable about it* and it should be wholly abandoned. (*if it isn't in some way followed up by a rebirth. then it's fine bc obv its not supposed to be real death but i digress) Any affirmation that Dying would in any way absolve you of anything you ever did is absolute garbage. It is a thoughtless and above all else lazy way to think about forgiveness - that anybody would just be better off if the person that harmed them just 'got what's coming for them'.

And Crime and Punishment would probably argue at this point that it's because you can't grow from your mistakes then. That Punishment is not (only) for the victim but for the offender to make amends with the past so they can move forward [without killing themselves]. And Griff's story can be read that way - not only is he never punished for his "Crimes", he is actively celebrated despite them.

But outside of that this Eye for an Eye mentality that a victim would and should get anything out of the misery and/or death of their offender is just another cycle of violence that our society is currently just basking in. It's an annoying itch that we just keep scratching because why not, it feels good right now and I promise I will stop before it gets worse! We all have urges that are 'natural' and yet we still all agree we shouldn't indulge in them - and Revenge should absolutely be one of them.

Forgiveness is a complicated process, both to forgive others and to be forgiven. There is no one way to go through it and there can't be only one since that's just the nature of our myriad unique human connections. But that's also what makes it such a fascinating thing to interrogate. Who is forgiveness for? How do you forgive? How are you forgiven? Do you even need forgiveness?

And I hate that thoughtless writers continue to use Death as a quick way out of it all, that we can just redeem a character by sacrifice because oh, isn't that noble, now what they've done isn't so bad anymore because i guess death is a currency now and this time it bought us a good ending.

But in Real Life Dying only becomes an option when something has gone terribly terribly wrong. An event in which somebody chooses Death is always a tragedy - and yet in fiction writing it is - different from reality - always a consciously constructed tragedy. The writer made this happen so the offender could die for their sins - because I guess there is just no other way that somebody could overcome doing a bad thing. Great news for all of us who ever did something bad!

So the way they went from "Griff talks about it to somebody for the first time and feels a little bit better about it" as if they went for a "Griff gets Group Therapy! You're not alone!"-Message only to still end up with both of them killing themselves is just deeply upsetting to me. If this is in any way supposed to be a story about regret, I feel like this could have been a "You will never get over it but at least you can talk to others so it gets easy enough to still live" story - because even if that's not a particularly groundbreaking narrative anymore either at least it's something actively helpful. But this? What is a veteran reading this story supposed to get out of this? Just die, it never gets better?

then again FF16 did this so much worse than Griff. at least reinkane has CrimePun parallels - and of course the overall framing as a whole is still 'this is what war does to a mf and should never happen' so i guess maybe that's the point? that even a winning war leads to people killing themselves?

Now. This is the point where the plot twists and I say: Okay. But maybe this is - deliberately or not - great writing actually. I didn't see this coming, I just gave what I wrote another read and then this occured to me:

There's just something here. Griff is one of the characters with a seemingly good amount of agency in this game - sure, he isn't a king or a ruler, he doesn't get to decide about this war, but he certainly has more agency than a good chunk of the characters in this game - he literally gets to tell Lars what to do - and yet. He just can't even think about trying anything else. His station just doesn't make it possible for some unpronounced reason. It doesn't even occur to the narrative that maybe he could - I don't know - Run away. Lead a Resistance. Even just interrogate his own actions. He did a bad thing and there's just absolutely nothing he can do about it but kill himself. (And there's something else here about why exactly death is an easier choice for him than anything else but this is already long enough)

Lars' story uncovers a truly wild revelation about this war they're fighting and it just. Doesn't affect Griff's story in the slightest. It doesn't come up once. He just doesn't know. Doesn't even notice. How can he not notice? When suddenly the people he cares so much about are gone and show up standing on the other side of the battlefield?

But you have to understand. This is really hard for Griff. He has to continue fighting because one time his actions killed so many. It's not the war's fault. Not the other army's. Not the bullets of the other soldiers. It's his fault. He did this. So he only has to fix himself. He can't possibly be asked to care about anything else, especially not whatever this fcking war is about.

And I don't know, doesn't that sound like... Ugh. I don't know the word, but it always comes up when people talk about white men. It starts with P I think. It's that word that people use! That you should check every once in a while... Ahh, who cares. I can just end this post about PTSD and war and not think about it any further because I do not have PTSD and the closest war will ever get to me is that maybe they're going to re-institute a draft in my country - but probably not and even if they do I won't have to go! And surely nobody on the world alive right now has a different experience from me. See ya!

also they could have made this story so much better if griff and the eyepatch guy fuc---

also also with how 063y and now griff went i'm so excited for argo. whoever is writing these has a lot of thoughts about men.

[wildissylupus]

So you know how D.Va and Sojourn are always working overtime, regardless of whether or not they want to? That they do it because their country needs them? Well, I've noticed that A., D.Va's parents are like completely out of the picture, and I saw an easter egg for Sojourn's disabled dog. (Completely irreverent, I know) But I think that D.Va might've been orphaned at a young age, probably because of the Omnic crisis, like Sombra...Just want to see what your opinion is. :D

Here's the thing, Hana couldn't have lost her parents to the Omnic Crisis because she was born after the Crisis officially ended. However that doesn't mean she wasn't orphaned by the Gwishin, I think it's most likely the case with her mother since we see no mention of her, there is mention of her father so it is possible that he's alive but he's only mentioned in passing in her backstory. Dae-hyun has more details in Hana's backstory then her father does.

Not only that but he's the only person she's been shown to be in contact with in her data logs. So either her dad died some time before she joined MEKA or they're in an Ana-Pharah situation where she and her father were closer when she was younger but drifted apart as Hana grew up. Either way we know her father isn't in the picture and again, her mother is never mentioned.

[liselicanis]

Good Things Fall Apart

[AO3 Link]

Chapter 2: Ratatouille

Three days later

It had taken her this long to finally find out what kind of omnic she had saved. A thorough search through all the holovids since before the first Omnic Crisis had finally revealed some answers.

Rubbing her eyes, Hana looked up from her computer screen to the omnic laying on her workshop table. An R-7000 model. She had heard a little bit about them in one of her history classes when she was in school. Seeing one was actually a rarity these days.

Even so, she also found out that no one sold any parts for R-7000's. She had checked thrice already, looking through every possible omnic repair site she could.

"Can't believe that not even Amazon has them," she muttered as she clicked away from the website. "'We sell everything from books to boats', what lies-"

On the table, Ramattra laid there, processing what the girl had said. Of course she wouldn't be able to find anything. When he had suffered a damaged forearm from a mishap in Nepal, it had taken nearly a year to find the necessary parts to repair it.

He cursed the humans who got the better of him, but most of all he cursed himself for allowing them to do so. He replayed that scene over and over, trying to figure out how he could have avoided ending up in such a pitiful state.

But perhaps he should be at the very least grateful that he's still alive. Even if he is unable to move or speak for the time being. He can even look past the fact that he's being helped by the humans he has come to hate.

Not the girl though. He can't quite find it in himself to completely hate her. For now he tolerates the fact that she's been touching him, inspecting his gears and wires, a frown on her face as she tried to picture what he must have looked like before she found him.

He knows he doesn't like the feeling of being so vulnerable whenever her good hand brushes against his faceplate. He can't feel the warmth, but even so, touching that area feels like a violation to him.

Sometimes he'll give her a warning, the remnants of his voicebox making terrible garbled sounds and hisses, sometimes he pretends to not be conscious, curious about what she's up to.

It is during those moments that he learns she talks a lot. To herself, sometimes to him, and a few times that other human is there, telling her to rest, or striking a conversation about mundane things. And something called a 'Tokki'.

(Did they have an omnic serving them under that name? If they ever managed to fully repair him, Ramattra would be sure to ask this 'Tokki' to join him.)

It comes to no surprise that she's talking again, but the girl is not too close so he can barely make out the words she's saying. Something about a rat?

"-from a long time ago. Can't compare to today's holovids but it has this charm to it. It's a slow movie, very different from the stuff that's produced today. Shame that company kinda fell off-" she keeps prattling on as she studies one of the fiber cables that once connected his shoulder to his right arm. "Hmm, you seem pretty big. Bet I could have ridden on your shoulders no problem."

As if he'd allow that.

There's a knock on the door and she's quick to cover him with a sheet before going to check who it is. Part of him detests her for doing this, even though he understands why she's doing it. To keep him a 'secret'. Perhaps her other companions held the same distrust towards omnics as he did towards humans but it's not like he'll know beneath a world of dimmed white light.

-

It's Dae-Hyun at the the door, holding a box of metal parts. Hana drags him inside the room before peeking her head out into the corridor to make sure no one else is around. All clear, good. Her mechanic goes over to the desk and gently places the box down, lifting an eyebrow at her when he spots the white sheet and the hulking mass he knows lies beneath.

"I'm surprised no one has seen that yet," he comments while Hana starts going through the box, picking up random pieces and inspecting them.

She picks up another piece to scrutinize before answering him. "Why would they? No one has gotten this far inside aside from you, and you're a special case." The piece gets set down in one of two piles. "These are from where I told you I found him?"

He nods and sits in her chair, elbows on his knees and fingers steepled together. "Yeah, there was just a lot of junk to go through. Whoever did this to your friend, they really went to town. I don't think it's every part but I did my best."

A nod is all he gets while she continues to sift through the piles, arranging and rearranging everything. "...no, this is too damaged, maybe we can try to see if we can replicate it and do an upgrade?"

"...aaaaand she's gone." Yet he smiled because that's just the kind of person he knew Hana was. When she was not defending their country she'd always be right beside him, both of them elbow deep in Tokki's inner mechanisms, repairing and upgrading everything they could. Covered in oil grease and muck. He watches her for a minute longer before turning to look at the covered omnic.

Getting up, he moved closer and removed the sheet to study the 'patient'. There was something about this omnic that didn't sit right with him, but he trusted Hana so for now he'd let it be.

"Any luck on finding parts on the net?" he asked curiously, his eyes trained on their guest's external chassis. It almost reminded him of a ribcage, and he shuddered. Spooky scary skeleton.

Hana glanced back for a moment and shook her head. "Nope! Nothing. Zip. Nada. The closest thing I could find was something from like, 30 years ago? Or something like that. R-7000. We weren't even a thought in our parents' heads yet, el oh el."

"R-7000? Huh. That sounds familiar," he removed the sheet and carefully folded it to set aside. He could have sworn he had heard about that type of omnic somewhere, but if this guy was from the times of the Crisis, then...

"...maybe we should leave him as is."

SMACK

A small Pachimari stress toy hits him square in the chest and landed on the floor with a defeated squeak. Hana is glaring daggers at him, her hand still extended from that throw.

"No. We've already brought him in, it would be cruel to stop now."

"But-"

Hana walked towards him, stopping short a few centimeters and jabbed a finger at him. "If you're not gonna help, then get out. I have work to do. Maybe Jae-eun will let you polish Princess or something."

He made a face. Sure he got along with Casino just fine but the guy was so very particular about his mech. "Hana-" but he's quickly pushed out of the room and the door is slammed in his face.

He hesitated on knocking again, but decided against it. If she wanted to be alone, that's fine. Maybe he shouldn't have voiced his thoughts out loud. The thing was, he was concerned about her health. Since she was told not to touch Tokki was she looking at that omnic as a replacement until she could?

Well, he can always apologize later when she's less upset.

-

Hmph. That boy was smarter than he looked. That human had every reason to be suspicious of him. Ramattra would make sure to remember that. The sounds of the girl moving metal was annoying, but what could he do about it?

Nothing but lay there and contemplate his situation. So far the humans had removed a bit more of his hardware joints, which he wasn't pleased about. At one point he did manage to get a glimpse of what they were doing, studying the pieces, the girl trying to fit things together as if he were some complex puzzle.

It both irritated and amused him, if he wanted to be honest. Humans were the ones who 'created' them but they still knew so little about omnics. She was young, so he knew that she hadn't been around during the times were his people were far more numerous than today.

During the past three days, he did also learn that she was part of a team that was responsible from holding the Gwishin at bay. Admirable, but in the end, how long would just 5 children hold out against an omnic army? How would they fare against his Null Sector?

Now there was a thought. Perhaps somewhere down the line he would bring his troops here and-

A soft sniffle interrupts his train of thought. She's standing over him again, looking quite pitiful as she presses a few buttons to move the table into a more upright position. There are unshed tears in her eyes as she does her best to ignore whatever is wrong with her.

"Don't worry, I'll fix you. You deserve that at least."

What was he, a project? She seemed to know her way around tools but the fact that she seemed so fixated on him was rather odd. If she know who he really was, would she still be doing this? Wasn't she a protector of humanity?

She's still touching him, petting the cables he had attached to his head. It was a choice he definitely had made to give himself a little more individuality at the monastery. He was secretly proud of them, but that was something no one would ever pry out of his hard drives. Yet here she is, acting like he was some household pet while she muses to herself. She knows he can hear her, right?

"You know, in the movie I was talking about, the little guy controls the human by tugging on his hair." He does the omnic equivalent of an eyeroll by flashing his lights, causing her to laugh and step back. "Wow okay, I know. Stupid idea, but hey, maybe you should let me try it once?"

No. He's allowing her to touch him without consequence at this moment, she should be proud of the fact that she's still breathing.

"..."

Sighing dramatically she moved back towards her desk to look through the parts Dae-Hyun had gotten her. There was really so much. Some of it did look like it belonged to him at one point, but they were mangled and twisted in a way that even with welding tools it would be nearly impossible to have it be the way it once was.

"I should thank him but sometimes...hey can I tell you something?"

Wasn't like he could stop her, so she kept going.

Plopping down on her chair, she moved it closer to him, her feet making mismatched sounds from tapping on the floor. "I know he's looking out for me, but to be honest, I'm not even mad at him. I know there are places where some radical omnics are rising up again, but even so, why does that mean I have to be hostile to every one I come across. What happened to you was terrible, and even though it's not my place, I'm sorry for what they did."

Stupid, stupid child. He doesn't need or want an apology from her. This happened because he made a mistake and underestimated the humans who he had come across. But he doesn't want an apology from them either. What he wants is their complete surrender. If he had to kill them to have it, he would do so. No mercy until justice was served. One way or another he would have it.

Her though? Now that was a question Ramattra couldn't answer at the moment. And it was one he hoped he wouldn't have to anytime soon.

[mswyrr]

In s2 Rhaenyra confesses to Mysaria that the driving force of her feelings for Dae/mon was a desire to get to *be* him, to get to do what he does and live as he does. "He was everything I wanted to be. Carefree. And dangerous. A man" (2x06). This can be read several ways, both in terms of sexuality and gender, but I want to focus on how it can deliciously reframe her behavior with Alicent in s1.

Specifically, she wanted to run off with Alicent and make Alicent her bride, but didn't feel she had the right, as a girl, to do this. She outright told Alicent "I want to fly with you on dragon back, see the great wonders across the Narrow Sea, and eat only cake" (1x01). Phrasing it with just enough room for plausible deniability - which Alicent picks up, dismissing it as a joke. Rhaenyra seems put out (but continues to allow room for plausible deniability) when she says "I never jest about cake."

When you take this scene combined with the script direction that said Rhaenyra is "(flirting)" with Alicent in a deleted scene [link to script], it's obvious (and has been since s1, despite the bullying and gaslighting!) that Alicent is a girl she *wants* romantically:

It was a sincere proposal from Rhaenyra to her first love, but cloaked due to the homophobia of this society. Rhaenyra comes as close as she possibly can to outright asking Alicent to go away with her. But she cannot cross that divide, both because of her internal feeling that who she wants to be is something only a man is allowed, and her concerns over Alicent's internalized homophobia.

This idea of running off with a girl comes up again, however - when Rhaenyra tells Dae/mon to run off with her and "Take me to Dragonstone and make me your wife" (1x05). In light of Rhaenyra's confession in 2x06, this has been reframed for me as Rhaenyra--now that Alicent has been stolen as a bride by her own father--transforming her fantasy of running away with the girl she loves into something she projects on to Dae/mon - a man who can socially do what she has always wanted to do and be who she wants to be. She thinks that getting to be with him, near who she wants to be herself, able to live it out through him, will be enough for her. That it will satisfy the hole the loss of her first love--and the seeming impossibility of being who she wants to be in this society!--has left in her.

But it cannot. Again, using her own words from S2, "He wished to possess me, but not to be possessed" (2x06). She tried to force herself to express who she is through him--playing the role of the "girl" she herself wanted and suggesting/pushing him to do the things she is not allowed to do, in order to achieve some subliminal expression of her true self, thwarted though it might be--but he never gave back in the way she needed. He never returned the favor and let her get to express who she truly is in her wholeness.

As with Cersei and Jaime, incest pairings in asoiaf can be about the deep wound of patriarchy on a woman who feels a drive to achieve and live in ways ladies are not allowed in Westeros. So the passion has different layers in both pairings, but a major part of it is the mirroring of the incest (the male lover is both Other and a male Self who is allowed to move and act freely in the world) and how it allows a woman to feel she can express the parts of her soul she is disallowed through a man who is her "mirror"/part of her already through their shared blood. But it cannot be forever satisfying to hide yourself away like that and suppress your own soul.

Hence Rhaenyra, in her own midlife crisis, finding Mysaria, a woman who can be the lady wife to her (Rhaenyra's "type" in women, as I argue in this meta) that Alicent was too afraid to be in their youth. It's part of the poignancy of their tragic love that Alicent was going through her own midlife crisis -- and also came to a place of bravely grasping for the queer life she has denied herself in the finale -- but by the time she finds that courage Rhaenyra had already committed herself to a different path.

[silversiren1101]

Inspired by a post from @commander-lariel

What *would* Mino’s dream be in Areelu’s lab? 

I think there’s a case to be made that what is shown to each person there is pretty surface level in terms of what they truly desire. For instance, why show Daeran the Galfrey scene instead of a world where he is free of the Other and his mother is alive? Why show Woljif on a throne instead of surrounded by people that truly love him for who he is? It’s not a perfect portrayal and it seems more superficial than true heart’s desire.

Mino’s core wants are relief, rest, safety, and of course a genuine loving relationship with her favorite Paralictor, but what would a ‘superficial’ view of this look like? You’d get Field-Maralictor Arangeir, low ranking but not a complete no one, taking orders from Paralictor/Lictor/Knight Commander (higher rank title than her) Derenge who is now in charge of operations. It’d be a scene of her approaching the war table to turn in a report of her latest mission. They’d accidentally brush hands, and a flicker of a glance would pass between them conveying more. He’d thank her for the hard work, with a single sprinkle of praise, and then order her to get some rest before the next mission.

That’s it.

Her core wants are addressed in the worst possible ways: she’s not in charge, she’s getting crumbs of attention from him, and she’s being ordered to rest rather than being granted actual relief. It’s not what she truly, actually wants in her heart but rather a bastardization of it.

As for what the others would think?

Regill: A shake of the head. He knows her opinions on command and she avoided it when they were both in the civil war. She’d shrug and blush in embarrassment and simply say he was always meant for leadership and she was not, they both know this. She just wishes the more capable of them was in charge. He wouldn’t see anything more in it but feel a certain offness.

Seelah: “Even your dreams involve work and the Hellknights? Remind me to ask Irabeth if we can schedule you some days off.” 

Camellia: Contempt. “You are powerful and respected, can get away with whatever you want, and you wish to go back to being a nobody.”

Lann: I think it would throw HIM for a loop. Lann’s whole character shtick is that of an unprepared boy being shoved into leadership and so he’s looking at every ‘leader figure’ around him for inspiration and guidance. Seeing the Knight Commander want in her dreams to be NOT a leader anymore? Crisis of faith incoming.

Wenduag: Mixture of fear and contempt like Camellia. If her current master is craving submission and relinquishing her power, then that’s a threat to her safety. “You WISH to grovel?! All that power is wasted on you!”

Ember: Probably the only one that would see the actual intent in the vision. Mino wants rest and relief. She doesn’t want to be in charge, she wants a pat on the head and a warm bed where she can sleep without waking up screaming and sobbing into her pillow each night. “You’re tired, Minnow. It’s okay. The sun will set for you some day soon and you will be able to sleep. It will for all of us. Then it will rise and you can start a new day.”

Woljif: I think he’d understand in a way, he doesn’t like the spotlight being on him and gets uncomfortable when people actually do rely on him. “Chief, be honest here, have you ever considered just running away? We can still do that hustle in Razmir!”

Daeran: Dae is the first one that figures out she has real feelings for Regill, and has by this point. He doesn’t say much, aside from something like: “Have some respect for yourself Mino... going back to taking commands instead of giving them? Absurd. You look much better at the head of the table than at the side.” He pivots to a different subject at the last second, as he does genuinely feel sympathy for her unrequited love. 

Sosiel: Discomfort for himself and also comforting to her, and I think he’d miss the meaning and assume it’s a self-confidence issue first rather than a stress/desperate for escape one: “You sell yourself short commander. I am glad you are leading us, and not putting us into the hands of a devil. You haven’t led us astray yet.”

Arueshalae: This is where she would realize Mino’s feelings, because a succubus (ascending or not) would lock into that desire there above all else. She’d looked alarmed, eyes flitting between both of them, heart aching with a quiet “Oh... Minovae.” 

Greybor: Dreaded Greybor, what would you think? This is still so early with him joining up, he doesn’t know too much about her yet nor the others. “There’s no shame in just wanting to do what others tell you. I’ve made a whole career of it. Mine just pays better.” I legitimately don’t know for him at this point, his relationship with Mino is way more concrete later on.

Nenio: Doesn’t even pay attention. Goes on a stream of consciousness rant about the magical mechanism behind the dream trap.

[bitchwholikesshitposting]

Heyo!!! pinned post time yippeeeee

(definitely do NOT check my #bitchart tag and reblog literally every single one of my drawings haha that would be terrrrible wowwww)

(Also DEFINITELY do not go follow @askthewheatleyverse and send me a million asks nooooo)

❗DISCLAIMER ❗

This intro might be changed and/or outdated at any point. I am a teenager and still figuring myself out. This is literally the identity crisis stage of life. Dont be alarmed if Im completely different tomorrow pls :)

My name is Bitch, and you can't stop me. :) (Alternate names include Gunnar, Demonic and Static)

I am a minor. I can interact with adults but like. don't. be a creep, the block and report button is there for a reason bud

NSFW accounts are unwelcome. get out pls :D

Bisexual and has a VERY fucked up gender. What's my gender? WHO KNOWS BITCH IT SURE IS IN EXISTANCE

I can draw. Sometimes. And also write. S. Sometimes not really

I like to like. Write up media analyses however you say it and reviews so watch out for those. I'm not like a professional critic or anything though. I just have a lot of thoughts about silly funne robors

I'll probably post a lot of stuff about my OCs, they'll be tagged and shit but watch out for THOSE absolute jumpscares. And also maybe interact and reblog anf gib your thoughts too because that'd be very encouraging and wowowo,,,

Wheatley not stupid truther. Have a. Lot of thoughts about that but I'm gonna keep them to myself so I don't get mauled

We're a system, I'm gonna be the main one posting on here but if there's ever anybody else we'll tag them!! :)

WE DO NOT ACCEPT CRINGE CULTURE HERE. FUCK YOU DRAWS FURRY ART DRAWS FURRY ART DRAWS FURRY ART

Pronoun list: He/It/They/Terror/Flame/Wheat/Burn/Bit/Gear/Vil/Claw/Cloud/Corrupt/Devil/Creature/Dae/Death/Fright, probably more. Use whatever you want i don't have prefs mostly

Interests list: Portal 2 (biggest interest, very important to me!!!), FNAF, The Sun And Moon Show, Bendy, Inscryption/The Hex/Pony Island, Spiderverse, Phoenix Wright (have only gotten through the first game so far, working on the second), TAWOG, Among us (i am aware of how funny that is), HLVRAI/RTVS, Team Fortress 2, Garten Of Banban (fuck the euphoric brothers), Adventure Time, Tattletail, and Billie Bust Up!

Weird brain things I have: Autism, ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, DID, RSD, Misophonia, the point is my brain said fuck you and gave me every disorder known to man. I might also have BPD, but I am not sure yet and need to look into it more.

Anyways come hang out with me if you feel like you're ready for the torment

(You can also check out my A03 here. They’re just for funsies and writing practice :) )