#cuz i was thinking abt it and i dont actually think he looks past what shes done? hes just more busy figuring stuff out about himself

[sunshades]

Also a thing that's relevant is in the canto even when they meet face to face Catherine is never actually able to speak back like she physically can't, she must reply through her diary and play out a memory in response, because she's already in a state that's more dead than alive. Then all those convos really take more of a vibe of well. They're farewells. Of course Heathcliff never chooses to spend those moments chastising her for her evil lab or something! Their time is running out. Bringing that up wouldn't go anywhere, she's already seeing the consequences, and he's already seeing what the thought process behind it was, because he can tell it would've been the same for him, and in fact he drops this right before the thunder actually shows him the flashback in the coffin.

Now that he's back, the manor is Catherine's shame. Her diary is the only way that's left to reach for him, tell the story of the choice she's made, and it... does resonate with him.

Which! The erlking has already taunted him about before, responding to his claim that causing more death in this already ruined place isn't the way to go.

But he does in fact still make his own choice! Which is the heart of it! Why does he want her back? Well! All the way to the end the erlking and Catherine both think the only way to reach redemption is death, as annihilation. And Heathcliff definitely can relate. But by the end he still knows the only way to fix what you've broken is to keep on living and work with what you've got.

And in this scene Catherine is unable to reply, but what she does is try to do a little fix of her own- they're in the memory where her words made him believe she never loved him, so she opens the door to a moment where she was as clear as she was able to, to amend for what she's said. Small steps, but they're taking them nonetheless. Which is also why it's important to recognize hashtag wh of a certain future is actually the two of them and not anybody else:

Through the ghosts, which the whole time have been a dangerous presence that's aware of the workings of the #narrative, we actually get proof of what Heathcliff's belief was that made him able to defy that fate, which is that it's never too late to make a change, become a better person for yourself and the people that love you. Of course he wants her alive again. He's survived the abuse at the manor and started his way to become a person he can be proud of, of course he'd want that for her as well.

[waloeders]

update on sao au!tomu

the minute i can find the proper ref pic of that knight!tomura they released recently for one of the games, this can be completed. he will have his full kit setup n everythin

WAIT I JUST REALISED HIS HEAD LOOKS MASSIVE 😭😭 WHAT HAPPENED. whatever. whatever.

[chlorinecake]

I just saw what that anon said and I can really really relate I feel like there's no way I can like them cuz I'm black I feel like. Weird for having a crush on Ni-ki cuz I'm black and even though I know there's no chance anyway cause he probably doesn't date fans obviously lol It makes me ashamed especially because people are always saying "what if / he probably doesn't like black girls/people" and it makes me feel like I'm less beautiful because I'm black and even if he did date fans I mean I'm like SOOOO ugly like atrocious but it makes me feel like even if I was a little bit more pretty he wouldn't like me or would dismiss me cause I'm black or like I wouldn't be good enough or he'd be disgusted or disappointed or weirded out because I'm black and a fan /has a crush on him and besides him it makes me feel like enhypen wouldn't talk to me or treat me the same cuz I'm not Asian or white like I couldn't be a fan or wouldn't be as important or pretty or cool or even just they wouldnt want me as a fan or like me or even look my way cause im black its gotten so bad that people dont evn have to say that anymore (they do but they dont have too) for me to think that way. Like I know we all saw that pretty engene video with that girl with the glasses and i couldn't help but make it about race like thinking would they look at me like that or would I be ugly abd weird cause I'm black ? Or if she was black would they still think she's pretty? Or would they even put the camera on her if she was black ? Anyway I'm rambling but being black is something I struggle with even without people saying the group I like or the guy I have a crush on (Niki obviously) wouldn't like me or would hate me for being black . Or they would be uncomfortable or disgusted with me because I'm black so it's just hard to even see myself meeting them or *even to imagine myself in reader fanfics even if the reader's supposed to be black because I've convinced myself that the only way I'd be pretty or attractive or they'd be friends withe or date me in Ni-kis case is if I was white or Asian* (*just talking about from a fanfic standpoint for this one* but yeah) but yeah it sucks and

Okay, I REFUSE to sit here and let you talk down on yourself like that. I don’t care how true you may think it is, YOU ARE NOT UGLY, Mirah ~ You’re beautiful, from head to toe, melanated skin, curly hair and all. Black women are beautiful, it’s disgusting to me how society has brought some of us to a point where we feel insecure, undesirable, or unworthy of affection from others. My words might not do much to encourage you, because finding confidence (esp as a black girl) takes time. But I really urge you to understand that you can’t expect other ppl to accept you when you don’t even accept yourself. Wish I could give you the BIGGEST hug rn, bc this actually hurts to read :(

Another point, I’ve seen plenty videos of Enhypen (along with other kpop groups) connecting with colored fans in the same way they do with their supporters of a fairer complexion, but I won’t share any of those videos here bc I don’t want you to seek “proof” as a way for you to feel better abt yourself.

On the flip side, let’s say that some ppl in the kpop industry DO have a prejudice (which I’m sure some do): your life and happiness isn’t dependent on their validation.

Let’s not even get started on how a lot of Ni-Ki’s favorite artists are black (Riki Jackson ? Bro would’ve never called himself that if he was racist)… but anyway, colored people like any other group of individuals can b really amazing once they get past their insecurities and embrace the way God made them. Jst know that u can always come to be if your struggling with something or just want to vent <3

[ikealoki]

the war is over my friends i am back on tumblr simply to pursue a dark pit of my life that is destined to swallow me whole as it did many years ago.

never expected to reenter my mcsm phase but it is back. and you know what?????? im about to draw such an egregious amount of old man yaoi (ivorren) it would put a victorian child into a coma. i apologize to all my followers for whats to come but i am so tired of the lack of doomed husband content.

this is a to-do list for the stuff im working on!!

mostly for me to keep track but also if u r yearning for content like i am and need something to look forward to

finish my fanfics of them and post it somewhere probably ao3 idk im so scared of posting them on here cuz i dont want my irls to see (they are of questionable nature…) but! if i do finish them i will post my handle and (perchance) link them -

build a base that would be like their home,,, not in beacon town or the end or the farlands but smth in between, maybe a nether base to cure ivors yearning for lava and sorens curiousity about creatures (i think he would LOVE striders but ivor loves them more because they understand his love for lava)

draw more content of them interacting with the new minecraft stuff, like i could do the whole old order in the trial chambers or finding the warden or something like that, just letting them actually go on adventures to make up for their past and stuff

and thats about it!! erm yea if anyone EVER wants to talk abt ivorren/the old order/broad mcsm i am the guy to go to bcs i love this game and i am tired of pretending i dont 🙏

[misfithive]

I wish for Wille to have a bit of a break from the writing giving him situations that can trigger his anxiety and panic attacks. I know it’s inevitable for some things to do that, but s2 was really bad for his mental health and I hope Lisa didn’t add anything else that could potentially lead him to close on himself and have bad thoughts again. Unless strictly related to his role as prince. But there is no time for more and imo, even if we won’t ever get to see it, he should first deal with everything that needs to be resolved/concluded and especially he needs to work on his mental health for more than a bunch of months before more stuff. There is no time at all either.

On the other hand, Simon needs to have a bit of more drama thrown at him, bc he really needs to have a breakdown in order to properly be able to start healing and work on himself.

I am very sorry to say anon that in an interview Omar said there would be lots of panic attacks 😭😭💗

Idk if it will be Simon or Wille having the panic attacks but i think Wille will probably have at least one. Only bc anxiety does not go away and he definitely has severe anxiety so i would imagine that whatever comes from him essentially coming out will increase his anxiety. So we might get more panic attacks 😬

But i do agree abt it being related to his role/resolving a lot of the issues that have been opened vs like a New Big Bad Thing. I had not considered this happening now idk 😭cuz i agree i want a lot of what has been opened already to be resolved. But i deff dont think his mom is gonna be suddenly supportive so i forsee issues in that respect

With Simon i think everything with Sara, the new pressures/public attention of being with Wilhelm, the drug situation, his mom finding out what he’s been up to, dealing with the monarchy, and possibly new stuff with Micke, he will have lots of drama and stress 😭

I do feel maybe people should be more like open to what his growth/healing looks like. Because even him opening up, going to therapy (idk if that will happen but maybe), talking about his past, asking for help (!!!) would be a great start to his healing journey. I love simon and i do want him to have support but i think a lot of people are attached to the breakdown and may be disappointed. Does he need a good cry? Probably. I honestly think most people who feel the pressure to be strong all need a good cry and let it all out but most of us do not have the safe space to do that. Hopefully Wille provides that safe space to him and I think he will actually let some tears fall instead of holding it in but i dont know if it will be a full breakdown. i worry what it would take to get him to that point since he has already had a lot of really horrible things happen to him and been betrayed by so many people he loves but maybe it will just a buildup of everything that he finally reaches his limit. Seeing Wille emotionally support Simon vs Simon always being the emotional caretaker for everyone and crying in his room alone is what I want to see.

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

do we get to kiss the narnia au blorbos 👀 how does our relationship with them develop throughout the course of the story? how does it start with both sun and moon and how does it end up? any significant trouble spots you can hint at without spoilers (unless you dont care abt spoiling!!)

and also i forgot if you already pointed this out somewhere but is there an aslan character? if so, who?

*inhales*

THANK YOU

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME TALK ABT THIS

okay. SO:

Yes, you probably will get to kiss the narnia blorbos...probably. Thing is, I'm not really good at developing romance plots (mostly cuz my brain never actually goes that far in planning and I always get caught up in leading events), but yes, I'm hoping I can actually get that far.

In terms of development...? Definitely Sun first, simply because he falls hard the second he meets you. Unfortunately, it's less because of you and more because of his past with humans and how scarce they are. You're the first human he's ever actually been able to talk to, you're there and you're real, and he doesn't want to let go of that. And it gets even better when he realizes that you like him too; after all, why else would you keep coming back to this dull and dreary world? He hasn't talked to anyone in a long time, and he doesn't want to give that up so soon, and of course, he has to protect what's his, doesn't he? Yes yes yes,especially in a world as dangerous as this one! He feels a strong need to protect you, especially after you meet Moon, who has a...slightly less pure love for you.

(Keep in mind, by the way, that Sun can be just as dangerous as Moon should he choose to be.)

Moon is definitely interested in you upon meeting you, but for...other reasons. He hasn't seen a human around in a long time either, or at least, not one who's lasted so long without his notice. Sun's lucky that Moon looks out for him, or the White Witch would surely punish them both for not handing them over. Thankfully, Moon is there to correct Sun's grave error by collecting the human himself! He hasn't had a new charge to tend to in a while, after all.

The Stone Garden is quiet up on the hill.

Moon does find you sweet and charming in your own little way, and he likes you, but like Sun, he wants to keep you for himself, and so he tries to convince you to take up his offer on visiting the Stone Garden and stopping by sometime, he's sure you'd like it, and he could protect you so well, just like all his other silent charges. You're so fragile, and fragile things need to be protected, yes yes, that's his job, the silent protector. And you're on board with it, too! Sure, he hasn't specified how long your visit would be, but you didn't seem to mind, none of his charges did in the end, or else they would surely say something about it. Every time he tries to take you, though, something pops up, and you leave him behind. Someday, he thinks, someday he'll have you all to himself.

Anything that could get you in trouble...? Well, a lot of things, actually, not that you really seem to mind. You find a good deal of interest in this world and its inhabitants, and they're all so friendly. Fortunately enough for everyone keeping a lookout for you, your obliviousness keeps you blissfully ignorant of all that goes on in the woods, and everyone is free to conspire as they wish. A few words of advice Moon's charges could have given you if they could voice them, however:

Trust no one.

Do not test the Dark Moon.

Beware the White Rabbit.

Avoid caves.

Don't eat anything offered.

Leave while you still can.

As for Aslan....

*laughs nervously*

weeeeelllll, someone suggested it being Michael, but the image of Freddy as a literal god was just to hilarious not to include, so I left it at that. Unfortunately I don't know much game lore regarding Michael (I really gotta do some research when I have the time), but I'd probably include him in Aslan's army as one of the people who escaped before Afton rose to power. After that, none of Aslan's followers were able to leave on account of being trapped in ice, and most of them were swiftly dealt with.

[mewozie]

🌸🪷🏵️FOR CHORO AND ASAHI MY GOATS

KYLEEEE ILYYY YAYAYAYA

🌸 Do you have any basic headcanons? (Age, Sexuality, Etc.)

I DOOOO Choro is 27, needs to wear glasses but in canon wears contacts so he looks "mature" in his own words, he puts up the "better, more responsible brother" persona as an act since in reality he's the most immature one out of them, but ofc there needs to be a mature one of the group LMAO, on top of that he DOES NOT wanna grow up, he doesnt wanna work and would very much rather stay at home and work on the house chores and raise a family. As for sexualities I usually stuck pansexual onto him :3

🪷 What's your self-insert or F/O like? Do you think they'd be seen as naturally compatible?

THEYRE VERY NATURALY COMPATIBLE imma copy and paste something from Asahi's toyhouse profile cuz I'm lazy to type it out LMAO "Asahi and Choromatsu's relationship is very lovey and sweet. They both very often go out and do things together. They both share the same type of interests so they both indulge and spoil each other with small gifts"

🏵️ How did your ship meet? What were their first impressions?

I dont have much lore written for them sadly its usually just concepts that end up sticking. BUT they went to the same highschool!!! Saw each other around from time to time and knew of one another but never really talked or hanged out. After graduating Asahi moves to America for college and work study and moves back to Japan a few years later. THATS when Asahi and Choro actually meet and see each other again. Taking the time to learn abt one another and enjoy each others company, especially since Choro has a hard time at making friends or being with anyone besides his brothers. Asahi's first impression is that Choro hasnt changed much in their eyes, and is the same as he always seemed. Choro is actually taken aback by Asahi since he transitioned since highschool, so he was more shy and quiet when they started to hang out :3

[lovezbrownies]

to be completely honest I almost forgot I made that req and I was likee ‘wow! That’s such a cool idea!!’ But I was thinking of two different one like a male and female one

male - the actual grumpy and the older sibling of the female med student who wants to help his younger sister. Because she keeps texting him in all hours of the night just to talk about her future spouse who doesn’t even talk to her, who just so happens to look at her direction for 0.1 millisecond anyways he really does love his sister but honestly he doesn’t understand. He doesn’t have time for love or any of this as he’s still trying to get his medical certificate to become a nurse! even if he dislikes hearing his sister become all stupid and googol eyes around the person she loves he does care about her. So he does root for her in the sidelines of his room studying for his next exam

female - the love sick puppy one (who I requested and especially want to see) who always annoys her older brother of a few years to talk on and on about the love of her life. Sure she acknowledges that her brother is studying to become a nurse and that she’s still on her way to become a full fledge doctor but who cares? THIS IS HER LOVER SHES TALKING ABOUT!! She’s already planning out the wedding theme and the invitations, future last name, future pets, house, and the kids names! darling only stared at her for just barely 3 seconds and that was all because darling darling mistook her for a pal of theirs

-🌪️

Ps. get ready I’m currently getting up like literal paragraphs of the female med student and I’m just trying to shorten them up to make them make sense yk?

oomf. YOU OUTDID YOURSELF WITH THE SUBMISSION BTW!! SO FUCKING FIRE YOU COOKED AND YOU BAKED MY GODDD!!! If you're uncomfy with your secret identity being out I will copy paste everything and write it under Anonymous Tornado or smth like that! Or if you're okay with it i will post it as is! with me dying from how good your ideas are in the end ofc

MOVING FORWARD! i wanna genuinely write smth like this soo bad like a yandere poly yk? WOULD BE SOO LOVELYY but i am drowning in requests as we speak so that's for another day!

This is so heat. highkey so heat. ALSO NEVER SHORTEN YOUR WORK BRUH?? DONT MAKE ME SAD LIKE THAT.

I find this idea so bomb like incredibly so. One falls first, constantly babbles about their darling until the other one decides "lets see what all the hype's abt cuz this is crazy" AND THEN ALSO FALLS DEEPLY IN LOVE?! so fire so heat they will squeal and talk about how cute you look concentrated in the privacy of their dorms, would take turns stalking you and shit MY BRAIN OOMF ITS OVERHEATING

But i feel like thats different from this ask so whats cuter than an older supportive brother watching his needy googly eyes sister try to bag you over and over again. He'd be like "No get them a new book bag and flowers, that book bag is on its last breath." and she'd go "YOURE SO SMART!!! i should write a personalized letter about everything i like about them too!!" Knowing his sister's letter would take 60 pages he'd tell her to just stick to the ideas he gives her

Though she'd hate it when you eventually marry her older brother would be with you the entire time while you shop for your wedding attire, and whatever else you need to get ready! Super supportive big brother and is so happy you two are getting married so he wouldn't hear his younger sister go on and on about you!

oomf when i get your brain rot asks my brain rots with you oomf. YOU MAKE MY CREATIVE SPARK IGNITE OOMFIE!!

[cringelordofchaos]

You asked Berry this so I am asking YOU out of spite for not asking ME

YOUR SONIC HEADCANONS??

IFHASHFKAJHVKAHDKC

uhmm ill be my own attorney in the court; in my defense, your honour, i saw berry reblog a post specifically about sonic sexuality headcanons and berry shared their hcs in the tags but also put in the tags abt how their 'headcanons may change'. and i wanted to see if their headcanons changed so i asked them

ANYWAY

uhh these r all pretty much identity + nd hcs so sorry if u were lookin for more

(edit:wait actually im gonna sort this into two parts:: queer + nd headcanons and then like. backstory and personality hcs)

SONIC: adhd, used to hc him as bi ace but fuck it hes romance repulsed oriented aroace, also me likes the idea of him being genderqueer in some way, moreso specifically either transmasc nonbiney or transmasc trigender. also adhd (side note i heard someone sayhe couldnt possibly have adhd cuz "he can focus on missions" and. wjhat.) also maybe ptsd from thecountless traumatic experiences hess had to endure

AMY: sappho. i have also adhd'ed her in the past but im not so sure npw. i also saw someone hc her as bipolar and thas valid

TAILS: i know he can definitely represent as an autistic stereotypce but look at him :(( (but i genuinely think his backstory is sort of a metaphor for the nd experience. and also i think theres a lot of things that may make him autistic codedthough albeit many of them r stereotypical). special interest in engineering

KNUCKLES: bisexual as ffffff, though he doesnt give a shi abt labels

and ofc STTICKS:: demirose lesbiian. . also female but she rlly doesnt care abt gender. also autistci mayhaps

now for the more interesting hcs:

SONIC: something traumatic happened to him that made him scared of water in the first place, thas for sure methinks. he also just doesnt really show his negative emotions and he moreso just tries to 'dealw it' instead. i have headcanoned this for years as many others have and it appears to be somewhat canon in frontiers which is pretty great. he plays the electric guitar and is a pretty skilled singer and yeah. chilli dawgs r his comfort food....... loves rock electric and heavy metal and sometimes listens to it on his runs. pretty comfortable w being independent . also this is not a headcanon but i dont think his idw iteration is that out of character. he sees pretty much everyone (rivals and frenemiesalike) as friendos

AMY: has some form of abandonment issues which is what makes her as clingy as she is. generally used to feel left out and misunderstood from sonic n others in games like adventure and adventure2 but their relationshipsget better. listen. listen i heard someone on tumblr hc amy having abandonment issues and it hasnt left my miind since. she used to feel embarrassed by herself and her personality but became much more expressive of herself as time went on bc she starrted feeling more accepted. DEFINITELY writes fanfiction and fancomics and draws fanart and likes theatre(this is canoon actually). has meetings w the girlsTM where she just reads their fortune n everything. she also said in one game that she aspires to BE LIKE sonic and i have hcs abt that as well. can b mischievious and sneaky. has a tarot card reading BUSINESS this girl earns money for this !! shes very magiical girl bc she can pull her hammer out there, tell the future, turn invisible, has a 'sonic snese' but this is not a headcanon this is canon. plays the violin. loves to create fun outfits. into knitting and crocheting. . yeah i have more

TAILS: he can get pretty insecure of himself at times, heholds high expactations of himself and feels like if he doesnt meet them he might as well be a failure. ooopslol. he also hates when ppl misinterperets who he is as a person and when they undermine how skilled he is. he sometimes doesnt really let others know how he feels and hides it w a positive attitude. his gizmo is his comfort item. sonic was his first friend. the reason why he acted cocky in lost world and constantly pointed out how they shouldnt trust eggman (although it was super ooc) is bc of how insecure he was and he felt like sonic didnt trust himenough. and he feels bad abt it. hm. he also likes to draw sometimes and is generally skilled and precise, partly bc he has to draw blueprints for his creeations. one of them orphans. wags his tails/unintentionally starts flying when hes excited (stimming woag). hes not really SCARED of thunderstorms but they ARE a sensory nightmare for hiim (loud, bright/0). sonic sort of 'taught him how to make friends'. he still has cosmo in the form of a plant inside his house. he has many bunkers/ Sometimes he has a hard time accepting help (inherited from his older brotherlol). his tails are an nd allegoryOK ILL SHUT UP NOW

KNUCLES: icoud rambllea lot about him whenever im in the mood especially when i seeppl misinterperet him but i dont really have much HEADcanons bc everything i say abt him is canon

STICKS: ok this is gonna sound wild and its definitely not original but. she has abandonment/truusst issues relatedto her former parents that have something to do w the government which is one of the reasons she became so hateful of th egovenrment. dont ask (actually do if you want to). generally feels free to be herself but there are times when she feels ashamed of her wild side ig you couldcall it. very creative.

the reason why theres not shadow even though hes one of the more popular ones is bc im just not obsessed w him at the moment sorry :(

I HAVE MORE but these are all FOR NOW

now YOU TELL ME YOUR SONIC HEADCANONS SO I DONT LOOK AS DELUSIONAL [[POINTS FINGER AT YOU]]

[mattslolita]

update bout the boy!

so last night he msgd me saying he wanted me to come over to his today bc we finish schl way earlier. so i was at his from 12:30 till 5. before i went i washed n dried my hair at my house. then when i was there i was telling him how i wanted to straighten my hair tmrw cuz itll last me a week (my hair does not get greasy) and he said we should do it today cuz he had fun last time we did it 😉😏 we took 2 HOURS!!! shocking but ANYWAYYY!

i was scrolling on vinted (like depop) for unused pandora charms for cheaper cuz bsfr im not paying 40 POUNDS FOR A PIECE OF METAL! (around 50 dollars i think) and he saw me looking and said "find one you like and send me it" UMMM 😂😍 i dint send him any but he saw one i favourited and bought it 🥹 i wanna cry bc WTF! LIKE MARRY ME ALREADY????? 🥰😘🤗😚💌💓

his mum and sister were out the house and mine and his friends knew this so they KEPT SPAMMING THE GC SAYING "dont do anything illegal" , "keep it pg (or dont)" , "dont get excited over there" , "keep calm and dont do anything freaky ❤️😘🤷‍♀️" , "yeah so *hisname* actually once saved my dying nan from a burning building, i never got to repay him, thankyou so much bro🙏" "what position r u guys in" WE WERE PISSING OURSELVES OMGGG! we called them and they were saying the same things so i jus told him to invite them aswel. when they came my friend was like "ORGYYYY!!!" WTF LMFAOOOOOOOOOO!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😏😏

not much happened at schl cuz we were there for like 2 hours an a half. but jus in general hes so respectful. like he never makes weird comments (like other boys) or makes me uncomfortable. bare minumum honestly but these days all boys care abt is where youll let them hit or not 🤣😉

AWWWWWWW hanging out together is sosososo cute that kinda reminds me of a he who must not be named from my past...

ANYWAYS !! how sweet omfg !! I woulda folded if he got the charm for me cause i LOVEE stuff like that

you guys r so cutie piee🥹

[ssskeleee]

《ok I've been needing to start writing a diary for a very long time now (even my therapist tried to encourage me to do so) so here i go ☆-diary entry day 1-☆》

13.3.2024

(9:24 am)

currently sittinh in the bathroom floor at school, it's been like ten minutes already oughhhjf i need to get back to class soon or my class assistant is gonna bomb me with the cvtting accusations yet again wahh

im feeling so anxious but relaxed and empty at the same time..

this whole over 1.5 hours I've been just thinking about trying out snorting my adhd meds (equasym) to see what would happen lol

and also thinking abt either cutting a styro/babycut on my throat or cutting a vein on my hand so i would maby get the medical attention I've been needing this past 5 years or so

cuz like apparently me telling my psychologist that the random episodes where im actually considering sewerslide like /srs isn't concerning enough then idk what is

LIKE ALL SHE PRETTY MUCH SAID WAS "everyone has bad days sometimes and if u feel like you want to cut mby consider usind the ice cube or rubber band method next time ☺️☺️" LIKE HUHHH.... DID U GET UR LICENSE FROM TEMU OR SOMETHING WHAT THE FUCKKK !!!?!?!!!!.!?!!!!!!

(9:51 am)

alr went back to class ghhgjd

my teacher just got me a cup of coffee ty pookie but i feel so weirddd feels like im hot ad cold at the same time amd my whole body is shakinf dies and fucking explodes

(10:13 am)

ok i pussied out from snorting them and instead tried to just put the meds under my tongue to see if it has any effect ..💀

currently not really feeling any effects minus shaking and light-headiness but maby that's just me being a whimp idk I'll update later if anything happens im scareddd ( T∀T)

10:45 am

OK BAD BAD MISTAKE GGELPL..

I SRARTED SHAKING LIKE REALLY BADLY AND IT FELT LIKE I WAS GOING TO GET AN PANICATTACK OR SOMETHING

then my pussy ass went to whine to the teacher rhat i felt pretty sick and wanted to go to the nurses office, so i did

i relaxed a little after talking to the nurse but still little shaky and light headed tbh

she questioned me then told me to go eat a little then come back when im finished like alrr pooksters 😚😚

11:58 am

at the cafeteria rn but we have tuna lasagna I HATE TUNALASNGA 🗣🗣🗣

like what even is that it looks like it has the mind of it's own stopit

(erm ignore the bunnies, had to put something over that hideous creature so it wouldn't be on display in my profile 😛)

11:18

FUCKING HELLL SHESBCALLING TO THE HEALYHCENTER FUCKKKKFLFKEKJW LIKE I KNOW I NEED HELP BUT I DONT WANT MY PARENTS KNOW WE JUST HAD MY GRANDMAS FUNERAL LIKE5 DAYS AGO AND MY MOM IS PRETTY STRESSED IN GENERAL RN FUCK IM SL HORRIBLE WTF I DONT WANNA MAKE THEM WORRIED STOPPP IM THE WORST SON EVER UGHHH

11:25

the nurse said that she's just making a quick call to the center GIRL IT'S BEEN OVER TEN MINUTES WHO ARE YOU CALLINGG MY WHOLE BLOODLINE??? PLS IM SO NERVOUS

11:43

alr ok im not going to the health center, but the nurse told me that if i get worse i should go see her immediately, or go to the center.

idk im little dizzy and shaky rn but i think we good 😀👍

11:50

hm im thinking about getting a therapy dog/ animal so i wouldn't get these weird toughts and ideas maby

having animal company just relaxes and helps me so idk i did talk abt it with the nurse and she was very positive abt it and said it was a good idea :3

i remember talking to my mother abt it too but she said something like "yeah but your anxeity isn't 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 bad 🤗"

like miss mam your kid cut himself in school multiple times, is paranoid that he might k1ll himself on a whim, tried to get high from his meds just for fun and sometimes even cries in class when left alone but okay if you say so 🤷‍♂️

12:41

alr idk actually maby i should go to the nurses office then the center after all..

maby i could finally get some help to my actual issues, rather than just for my learning problems but who knows

12:50

guys maby taking my meds drug abuser style wasn't such a good idea after all me thinks

13:06

alr school ended but im currently sitting at the nurces office ughh my head spins

feels like im in a dream

13:41

okk walking to rhe health center rn wish me luck gusy

13:46

NVM UHHHSH IM HAVING DOUPTS HHELPP....

IM SO NERVOUS MABY TH8S WAS A BAD ISEA ARFTER ALL UHH

13:51

ight fam im here what noe

14:15

alr they checked my pulse and stuff,

everything was much normal than earlier but my pulse was somewhat high

now im just waiting for another doctor to come and talk to me gulps shivers

14:37

attempt to finally get proper care failed miserably im so pathetic man

they just checked my pulse n stuff and let go

no guestioning why i tried to overdose on my meds but okay.

that shit was so embarrassing dawg💀

i should've just taken more fucking piss baby pussy whimp why didn't i make them check the huge gaping scars on my leg to see if they're infected ugh

alr then i have to think something else, my fucking family and psychologists only care about my academics like i just wanna know what's wrong with me and how could it be fixed

im only diagnosed wirh dyslexia and adhd and in my opinion neither one of them makes a guy act like this tbh..

i also feel like that me being self aware of my situation and everything makes me feel like im just faking this all/ being mentally ill and it just makes me feel so embarrassed and total shit

like it's not valid

like the ppl arounds me, especially my family and friends are just being stressed out over my nonsensical shenanigans

(took me over half an hour to yap allat wtf����)

15:13

GUYS IS EMOTIONAL SUPPROT FERRET A THING PLEAS3 JUST LOOK ST THEMMM 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️

the way i would never even look at a blade if i had one omgf

i know they are alot to handle and probably wouldn't be a good therapy animal but please jst let me be happy okay?? 😢😢💔

16:01

eepy

16:50

AAAHH HELP STHIT I FORHOT TO TELL MY PARENTS THAT MY DRUMMING LESSON ENDS AT 16:45 ...

both of my parents were just calling me non-stop (my phone was on silence mode 💀)

giggling when i walked out of the building where my class was i just saw my dad pulling away and i just stood there watching him leave like

17:13

meow got home likw 10 minutes ago

it's so weird trying to act all normal with my parents while they have no idea taht i nearly almost overdosed with my meds at school tday 😛

22:28

prolly gonna go sleep soon my heaf hurts so bad gn guys follw for more bangers🔥🔥

[felikatze]

it has been five million billion years since Feli's Ninjago Season Review, but i just finished crystalized. so.

tldr. i watched the first part Some Time Ago and dont recall how i felt outside of "yeah i liked it", the middle section of the season rlly dragged, but the last bit was really good

iirc my main complaint with the nya rescue arc was how it absolutely TRASHED skylor. she BARELY had any speaking lines and was basically just there as a Back Up Zane to keep nya from melting and i hated that. however the last third of the season rectified this by giving her an actual cool moment when she rescues kai and cole, as well as an actual character moment.

like you have the pixane and jaya reunions back to back so kai's talking with skylor again, he still likes her, he tries to ask her out, and she rejects him on grounds of "dude do you know how long it's been?" and both sides here are understandable. like yeah considering everything that happened the past seasons kai rlly didn't have time for a relationship but also skylor is RIGHT to be frustrated he just wants to go back to like. s7. after so long. and it gives the sense that things between them COULD work but they need some time to be friends again first. i like that.

generally all the canon couples were great ESPECIALLY in the last third. the ice emperor as an insane comedy bit was fantastic actually and also rlly funny how pixal just didnt even grieve this time. she did that in s12 already she's just gonna go fix him up np. HOWEVER when her backup squad gets ready to roll and zane isnt repaired yet and she has this monologue abt how zane's sacrifice for her made her more than just a machine and showed her love and she loves him SO much and she gives him a lil kiss and leaves and then he wakes up. i dont CARE if true love's kiss is nonsense for robots it was CUTE i love pixane

"If there is a life after this for beings such as you and I... I will find you there." AURGH paraphrasing the quote here but do you SEE why pixal is my favorite ninjago character ever. i love her so much. my pixal stan instincts got reactivated i did nearly cry at that scene.

third couple jaya also has cute moments. the season shows a lot how they make each other stronger and cover each other's doubts and jay's encouragement giving nya the confidence she needs to regain her abilities is just cute. you can see a lot of skybound-isms esp in how the mechanic ends up goading her saying she's not a "real" ninja (like e.g. how she doesnt get a dragon form) but she kicks his ass anyway cuz it doesnt matter whether she has powers it matters that she gives her all always <3 yayyy

ok next up talking abt MY GIRL HARUMI YEEHAW.

i like her arc this season there's a lot of conflicting elements to her. first of that she for real just DIED is extremely interesting. there's always a juxtaposition of what harumi believed and what was actually true (her thinking lloyd never looked for her when he actually spent so long sifting through rubble the others had to drag him off cuz they had to go find the oni) and i think the climax of that being her hearing from the horse's mouth that the ninja (and lloyd) were never responsible for all she blamed them for was great. like already she was torn on lloyd and i feel like her in the jungle with lloyd seeing that she CANT win his trust back ever again like this did actually like. affect her on some level. she cant trick him anymore she has to live with the consequences of her actions and see that she fucked up. good. her dynamic with the overlord obvs parallels her dynamic with garmadon in s8/9 in how she's his right hand most competent underling whatever but whereas she admired garmadon she doesnt like the overlord and helps him out of fear for her continued existence cuz he DID give her life again and he could take it away just as easily.

but in that sense garmadon initially gave her "life" back too when her parents died and she needed something to hold onto so her opposing the overlord finally means she's taking the reigns and acting without some grand figure in mind but just for herself and what she believes is right

okay next up lloyd. lloyd is SO fucking bitter and angry this season which is a contributing factor to the dark (tiring) tone of the middle third and it does grate but it's understandable. i know some people dont like his new dynamic with garmadon cuz it basically retcons sensei garm who we all love yadda yadda but the new garmadon does have to be seen as his own independant character and if you do he's pretty compelling. anyway lloyd's anger. lloyd fucking HATES garmadon in this which is Delicious. obviously consequence of the hunted trilogy and i like that. lloyd is OVER grieving what could've been and what he lost. he hates what remains and he doesn't want anything to do with garmadon.

except garmadon is showing signs of change. that even though the good part of him remains dead that what's left can still recover and learn compassion and i think why that frustrates lloyd so much is that he hates that this compassion doesn't extend to himself. that though garmadon cares about other things now garmadon still doesnt care about lloyd. lloyd wants that young innocent part of him that always adored his dad to be dead and gone because becoming what was left of his father was his greatest fear for a LONG time now (firmly established in season 11!). but that part is still there. he still loves his dad and hates him at the same time and that's confusing and upsetting him.

christofern is a lloyd analogy obviously. like back in ye old days of the early seasons, lloyd was the only thing garmadon cared about and the catalyst for garmadon's first redemption. even when lloyd withers he comes back. he tries again. ninja never quit just like that damn fern never dies yeah <3

garmadon and lloyd are BOTH kings of poor emotional awareness in crystalized since garm is struggling to even understand compassion and kindness and love at all that he cant see that the part of him that loves lloyd isnt dead either. but the main part of him is just yelling "the green ninja is an enemy." lloyd gets FED UP cuz like if my dad called the girl who tried to murder me like a daughter when ignoring me i'd hate him too. but garm being so mean to lloyd to help lloyd with oni form is garmadon trying to care about him by making him stronger. and since oni form thrives on negativity garm is giving lloyd fuel. obviously this sucks ass and is bad for their personal relationship.

the interesting switch here is in the finale when garm gets lloyd to oni form by pretending to be dead cuz it shows on both their parts an awareness that they love each other. lloyd by showing anger over his father's supposed death and garm by knowing that faking his death would actually work. it means he knows lloyd still cares abt him. then again lloyd is SO fuckin right again to insult garm over this bcuz. dude. that is still emotional manipulation committed with few regrets and lloyd has had enough of that for a lifetime. king of getting manipulated and trying so hard to stay kind despite getting fucked over so often. pythor harumi garmadon. etc etc.

right what else. i cant fucking believe the season made ronin good again GOD BLESS in undoing some of the island's many sins. thank you for showing ronin isn't as selfish as he appears to be and showing up to help the ninja again cuz it's just the right thing to do. thank youuuuu

all the character cameos were great. again skylor (with some caveats), ronin, racer seven!!!! she was so fun!!! blazey hi!!! you're insane!!!!. using vinny's convo with garm from s10 (the best scene in march of the oni, actually) to springboard all of garm's redemption arc bcuz it DID deeply affect garm even in s10 and by extension making vinny a major supporting character. hilarious. fantastic. incredible. oh my god they were roommates.

i also always love the paperboys when they appear. can you BELIEVE they started out as "the random kid who broke his arm in skybound." ah how far they've come. thank you nelson and antonia for being great.

the other camoes at the end were EPIC N COOL like i do like that cole n nya succeeded despite thinking they'd failed cuz it plays into the never give up message but i AM disappointed that none of the cameos got ANY speaking lines cuz (voice actors cost money)

like no little quips no nice to see you again. not even vania fighting her dad? no benthomaar. the whole crew from across basically all of wildbrain era + some extras (how many seasons has it been since cole's dad appeared onscreen?) gave an incredible upswing to the dreariness but it just rings hollow when they dont even get to make noise. dead silent. eerie.

uhhh what else. again i think most of from after harumi and lloyd leave the jungle to wu meeting up with the paperboys fucking DRAGGED cuz it was just one loss after another after another after another and at some point its like DUDE WE GET IT YOU'RE INVINCIBLE. CAN WE GET THE MCGUFFIN ALREADY. but once wu got that upswing and the ninja all had their own little adventures it was good again and a consistently good time for the rest of the season i was enjoying it.

i agree that it def feels like lloyd's arc this season isn't rlly resolved at all. he doesn't embrace his anger or his heritage and is still firmly stuck on denying parts of himself. bcuz lloyd kept denying WHY he's angry and just dancing around it it only got worse. the other ninja had nice cap off points. the other one with the biggest arc is nya but her development mirrors s11 kai (as so helpfully pointed out by jay himself lmao) which ends with nya knowing once again that she doesnt need to be special to be needed and harkens back to ye old conflict "if I'm not a ninja and i'm not samurai x anymore, then who am i?" you're NYA and you're cool as hell that's what. she doesn't need to be anything as long as she can just DO what she has to do.

whereas lloyd is again still just. right in the middle of it.

i do like the ending of garmadon putting the fern in the ground bcuz again lloyd metaphor it means he acknowledges that lloyd's friendships aren't a weakness ("You need roots") and also symbolically he's letting go of lloyd instead of chasing the shadow of the child lloyd used to be. good stuff.

so. season has it's good moments has it's bad moments. it needed some time to find its footing but i like the callbacks to other seasons (A SUPRISING AMOUNT OF SKYBOUND THEMATICS??? a lot of this is skybound but better) and once it did find its footing it was really good.

master of the mountain is still my favorite season though.

[null-doesnothing]

I hope you dont mind but since you've left spaces open for sulu, scotty, uhura, and chapel I figured I'd step in with my own like a nerd

Sulu: dont have any specific sexuality or gender headcanons for the guy but he's gotta be some flavor of queer I fear. used to love going to beaches as a kid and cant stand it anymore, listens to a weirdly varied amount of music genres (like you'd look in his playlist and find top 20 pop list type music and the most niche shit you have EVER heard of. also some shit Chekov snuck in there that he decided he didn't care enough abt to get rid of) also probably the type of guy to just have the One playlist and its just his liked songs and everyone who looks at it is like "dude wtf IS this". he has no explanation. Next to Spock, he's the most heat-resistant of the group, though unlike Spock he actually handles humidity fairly well (cant relate im from the desert I would drown) Oh also you cant tell him shit cuz he's a major gossip sorry

Scotty: probably unlabeled honestly if I had to guess, I don't think he would care too much abt it... or think too much abt it.... busy w/ da ship. honestly this is barely a headcanon but the mf just loves feeling impressive at any given moment. about anything. ever. Also has definitely fallen asleep while working on something and almost wrecked his whole face. oh also he probably had a cat at some point in time that would sit on him as he slept and one night he accidentally like. threw it off in his sleep. and he felt really bad about it. dont ask how I know it was written in the stars shsshhh

Uhura: either lesbian or bi, personally I lean towards lesbian for her. can draw!! really well actually!! does it in her free time and sort of keeps them to herself, I think if she met Data they'd bond over the little art adventures going on there. Also she can only hypothetically cook. like- she knows what needs to go into a dish, and how to make it taste good, and she could instruct someone on what to do? but as soon as she actually physically tries to make a dish just. 🔥 uhhh has a collection of ancient (lol) cassette tapes that she Can Not Play because she couldn't find a working cassette player. Scotty's ended up working on making one as a side project

Chapel: lesbian. that is a lesbian woman with comphet. absolutely. 100%. has some betazoid in her but not enough to show At All (though to be fair, not much to show up anyways. also this is my watsonian explanation for Lwaxana having her exact face, though tbf ig like it could be the other way around but SSSHHHH) and was also raised on Mars for some of her childhood. oh also has just the most insane Bullshit Detector ever, it's very very difficult to get a lie past her. as a child her hair was brunette and got more blonde over time, but her hair in tos is dyed to give it a different tone. also this one goes against canon but ACTUALLY WEARS GLOVES IN SICK BAY AND GETS ANNOYED WHEN BONES DOESNT

ahem- now, I'm going to be very self-indulgent for a moment and, instead of just leaving it there, I'm going to attack one more character with my headcanons because he's my FAVE and NOBODY EVER MAKES HEADCANONS FOR HIM so uhhh. that's my thing rn I'm hijacking your post a bit

Sarek (I love him sm I'm sorry): as a little boy he was probably one of the least well behaved, most rambunctious, and emotional children on the whole of Vulcan, and for the most part was just generally a pain in his parent's asses for a long long time. eventually he became the hyper-strict unemotional logical vulcan he is now, but he definitely wasn't always that way, had to be drilled into him. that's feeds into my headcanon for why he treats Spock the way he does, there's slight fear at him acting human but generally, his fear leans more towards Spock ending up like he was as a child. totally incorrect fear my guy but hey idk what do I know. oh also I think you can't ever show him star wars because he would see Anakin's storyline and have a heart attack spontaneously. OH OH ALSO- this one ISNT a headcanon but I-Chaya was HIS pet first! the headcanon here comes in that I firmly believe when he was like. 6. he picked up little tiny baby I-Chaya and was like "im keeping it. mine now." like a child adopting a stray cat off the street and their parents begrudgingly accepting it.

sorry that's way longer than the other guys' I think abt him a lot

favourite star trek headcanons?

Oh boy I have ALOT hehe (thank you so much for asking :3) (and these are just my silly headcanons and it's totally find if you disagree with them <3)

Id like to hear your favourite headcanons @etherealspacejelly :3

Kirk: Hes trans and pansexual (or bi I like both), that bitch loves to vouge its his favourite dance move hehe, kept the boob window shirt from amok time and wears it just to annoy Spock, is Jewish, (this one is more for AOS kirk but whatever) He LOVES 90s and early 2000s rap and hip hop such as the Beastie Boys.

Spock: Jewish on his mums side, is gay MLM or unlabelled (I like both hc), really likes ambient music and falls asleep to it and white noise.

Bones: Is bisexual (yeah no, no character in TOS is straight sorry) loveeees to sing country songs when no one is around or can hear him even while on duty (Kirk definitely caught him once singing and teased the living fuck out of him), he loves to wear low raise jeans (old man whore), he has anger problems, a chronic smoker (yes yes he's a doctor but come on...he needs to let off some steam man) loves old country music especially from 20th century Earth, a massive fan of Dolly Parton and sings her songs regularly (his singing voice isn't actually that bad either, quite soothing but slightly deep)

Chekov: bi-curious (NO SLAVIC PERSON IS TRULY STRAIGHT...coming from a slav hehe) weed smoker so he probably smells like kush 50% of the time, is eastern orthodox (religion wise) he absolutely adores late 20th century (80s-90s) Russian Post-Punk such as Кино and Nautilus Pompillus, he also listens to Bladee and the drain gang in general (idk man he just seems like the average drainer/Bladee fan) also uses She/Him pronouns...(or that's just me projecting myself onto him)

...yeah you can CLEARLY see which characters are my favorites hehe (also I didn't put on hc for sulu scotty uhura or chapel since I barely have any)

[belovedcherie]

I posted 498 times in 2022

That's 498 more posts than 2021!

94 posts created (19%)

404 posts reblogged (81%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@luymani

@pcktknife

@tizzymcwizzy

@belovedcherie (lol its me)

@buggachat

I tagged 497 of my posts in 2022

#art - 137 posts

#reblog - 128 posts

#fav!!! - 101 posts

#cherie's chats - 69 posts

#miraculous ladybug - 64 posts

#project sekai - 56 posts

#cherie watches stuff! - 30 posts

#cherie's aesthetic - 21 posts

#spy x family - 20 posts

#splatoon - 18 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#if i had a penny for everytime we were worried bakugou died i'd have 2 pennies which isnt a lot but its concerning that it happened twice..

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

THAT TEASER IS GOING TO PUT ME IN A DAMN COMA

9 notes - Posted July 1, 2022

#4

thoughts on multiplication

bc i need to scream about this SOMEWHERE. LIKE WOW. OKAY.

obviously spoilers are under the cut !!

tld;r: yelling abt adrien and WHAT ARE EVERYONES INTENTIONS??

ADRIEN FALLING FOR MARINETTE ADRIEN FALLING FOR MARINETTE ADRIEN FALLING FOR MARINETTE ADRIEN FALLING FOR MARINETTE

yes im gonna yell about this first because adrienette holds my HEART YOU DONT UNDERSTAND THEY R EVERYTHING TO ME </3

ive been waiting for adrien to pin for marinette in canon for so long and season 3 def delivered with the little stares he was giving her BUT NOW THAT ITS FRFR HAPPENING?? HIS BLUSH WHEN HE LOOKS AT HER IN THE MORNING? HIM IMMEDIATELY CALLING HER UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO TELL HER HOW SPECIAL SHE IS? SOBBING

okay but the fact that he probs tried to kiss her every. day. we only saw 3 sequences but if that montage happened over the span of several weeks..... i am swooning. i am in tears. shambles.

adrien had me KICKING MY FEET AND RUNNING LAPS OKAY I HAD TO PAUSE SO MANY TIMESSDHFK

that being said before i write an essay on light of my life adrien lets talk abt,,,

reverse love square??

i love the idea of reverse love square bc adrien being a lovesick fool for marinette is my aesthetic but iM JUST HJDGSFSGKF BC OF THE TIMINGG

i was kinda hoping for some sudden rapid development today but im not complaining at all dw 🙏🏾 simp-drien is enough

the ladynoir moments are real cute tho :( them playing cards im cryingsdjhs

im excited to see the ship dynamic in the future episodes heheheh

GABRIEL. AGRESTE.

this man becomes more of a loser every episode what else is there to say

him digitalizing adrien.... funny... not funny haha...funny weird....

i hate when this guy gets smarter cuz he always has some wack trick up his sleeve 😔 but i wanna know more abt those weird siri rings

ALSO HOW DOES TOMOE PLAY IN THIS?? i think she knows hes hawkmoth but why is she helping him?? ik they were leading up to their partnership before so i guess we'll finally see why they were so secretive in the past!!

lie-la

i was gonna talk abt her in the gabriel point but this girl is so annoying she deserves one for herself

SHE GETS ON MY LAST NERVEEE

the genuine irritation i feel whenever i see her character on screen is actually funny

"ladybugs just a kid we need to forgive her ;(" GIRL I HOPE PARIS CAN FORGIVE U FOR THE CRIMES YOU'VE COMMITTED??

im sorry theres nothing productive to say abt her other than the fact that it seems shes going to play a bigger role this season (sadly) (but also yay cuz she brings the spice)

okay last point is abt felix

HELP WHEN HE APPEARED AT THE END 💀💀 THIS GUY WAS HERE THE WHOLE TIME????

i hope and PRAY he treats dusuu well homegirls been going through it D:

WHAT. ARE. HIS. INTENTIONS.

See the full post

11 notes - Posted June 21, 2022

#3

i saw miraculous was trending and i was like OMG IS THERE FINALLY A NEW SEASON 5 EP?? but it was just beau 😭

12 notes - Posted August 30, 2022

#2

HI so um. back in 2020 kade made this meme thing and i dont think ive ever recovered from it bc I WAS SO TOUCHED LIKE 🙁 NOBODYS EVER MADE ME A MEME BEFORE

since we started talking again a month (+ a day bc i am late) ago i had the idea to make him one in return bc TALKING TO U MAKES ME SO HAPPY AND U DESERVE THE WORLD !!!

sooo here ya go @luymani ILYSM!! happy one month anniversary /p (that sounded way funnier in my head im so sorry LMAO)

13 notes - Posted August 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

thinking abt my son syaoran li ♡

See the full post

27 notes - Posted July 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[sunookkii]

hey i know request are closed but this idea just got stuck in my mind and i wanted you to write sum about it if you like it 😭 so basically its an enha reaction/scenario ? where they forget your birthday, (maybe not in a bad way but i dont mind if its angst) hope ur good btw !! <3

a/n : OMG WAIT SRY TO ALL THE OTHER REQUESTS BUT THIS ONE FOR SUM REASON REALLY STUCK OUT TO ME i hope you enjoyyy ;) also I wrote so much I’m so sorry- [not really read proof~]

Also i am well ty for asking >.<

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.enhypen imagine ˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

Enhypen forgetting your bday~

Genre : angsty ish

Warnings : mentions of food, crying, one swear word??

Requested : yes ty beautiful person ;)

Heeseung :

Okay okay so its your birthdayyy and you were really excited for what to happen because you wanted to see what kind of surprise your boyfriend did for your birthday

But to your luck he forgot :(

So you spent all day giving him hints like ‘what day is it’ and at one point you gave up and started pouting really hard

And your face was just overall sad everyone else had remembered your birthday including the members, but for your boyfriend to forget it lowkey hurt

Almost half the day passed and he still didn’t remember

So you ended up going into the room by yourself and started to cry

Your whimpers got louder and louder even though you were trying your best to stay quiet so he doesn’t hear

A few minutes past by and heeseung started looking for you because he sensed something was wrong.

He looked on the calendar really really carefully and FINALLY he came to his realization that it was your birthday but it was kinda too late cuz you hid yourself in your room to cry.

He came into your room to wish you a happy birthday but he sees you curled up into a ball crying to yourself

He felt so bad after this happened, “IM SO SORRY IM SO SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME I WONT EVER GORGET AGAIN!”

He hugs you so tight as if your life depended on it, won’t leave you out of his sight for the rest of the day. You’ll be hearing a lot of hbds and ilys for the rest of the day~

^ so yeah 🤕

Jay :

I feel like it’s rare that he forgets these type of dates buut for the sake of tumblr lets pretend he completely forgot 😧

You woke up in a great mood because it was your birthday of course

You were expecting to be receive a hbd wish from your boyfriend, but nope nothing all morning.

You received a bunch of hbd wishes on Instagram and other platforms mentioning you, but none of them were from jay :(

You quickly got frustrated and because it was your birthday and your bf the person you love most didn’t remember really hurt

So gradually your face became wet from heated silent tears. But unlike heeseung he would super quickly notice because he’s on his phone a lot and he dates things like ‘y/ns bday’ (idk but I imagine him dating things on his phone)

He’d then be like OH SHIT ITS YN’s BD

Runs to you soooooo quick just to see your face red and a bit wet.

Once your eyes connected your tears started to come out quicker

He literally runs up to you to hug you HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IM SO SORRY I FORGOT

After he said that he ran away from you leaving you alone, which made your heart drop thinking that he didn’t care.

But once you finally came out of your room you were greeted with a homemade delicious cake your boyfriend made for you that looked like this

You could tell he felt really bad bc usually he always had a smile on his face while cooking but this time it was a ‘I’m sorry’ face

“I’m really really sorry please forgive me”

All was forgiven bc the cake tasted so mf ing good

Jake :

It was your birthday today, a day that only came once a year so like any other human being it’s a special day for you

You were super excited to see what Jake did for you, because every birthday you had with him was always such a surprise

But today was sort of… different? :(

You saw jake in the living room on the tv and went straight up to him with a smiley face. “GOOODMORNINGGG” 😁

After cuddling for a while on the couch you lifted up your head and asked him If he knew what day it was, he just replyed with a simple Wednesday? With a confused face

I’m pretty sure that one word was enough to make you pretty upset 😅🥲

You started to pout and went back into his chest with a disappointed face.

“Ahh what what, what day is it tell me?” He said playfully, not realizing it was your birthday.

You stayed silent as he checked his phone, ‘y/n’s birthday don’t forget’

When i tell you he gasped he GASPED.

You were already in the verge of tears “IM SO SORRY HBD BABY”

You were still a bit upset at him so you replied with ‘did you really need your phone to tell me what day it was’ 😕

He hugs you tighter while mumbling ‘hbd hbd hbd’

Suddenly let you go of his arms and said he had an errand. Without any explanation he got his car keys to go somewhere leaving you and your thoughts by yourself.

‘Does he not love me anymore that he doesn’t even want to spend time with me on my birthday? ☹️😭”

A while later he comes back and you’re luckily still on the couch where he left you

^^this dude came back with three beautiful cakes from your local cake stores. “I’m bacccckkkk!! please forgive meeeee you know i love you with all my heart 🥺” (okay i hate to use this emoji but there isn’t any other way to describe it TT)

You obviously forgave him because you know it was never his intention to forget,,, “you owe me hugs and kisses for the rest of the day :(“ kindly accepts your request because that is something he’d never complain about #freecuddlesfromyn

Sunghoon :

Okay but like hear me out he’s the type of boyfriend that would ‘pretend’ he forgot your birthday but he actually didn’t

So when he ACTUALLY forgot you just thought he was joking until…

“Hooonieeee, stop joking around I’m seriouss”

“I’m serious too i seriously don’t know what day it is”

“What…”

You leave him for a bit alone with his thoughts, not even gna lie if he did end up forgetting your bday it would take him a while to remember it

But once he remembers he feels so bad 😭

Tackles you with so many hugs and bday kisses and showers you with I’m sorrys and hbd wishes

genuinely ask himself how he forgot the lohls birthday (love of his life’s) literally beats himself for it

And you have to tell him that it’s fine and that you forgive him~

Brings out the birthday cake and sings you a happy birthday song while clapping and laughing.

Puts cake on your nose

Sunoo :

Idk if he’s the type to forget but like jay I don’t think he’d forget

I feel like to him birthdays are the MOST special thing/ date for a person

Like obviously the rest of the members think that but especially sunoo really like sticks to this

So if he had forgotten your birthday you were sooo hurt you ignored him the whole day keeping your distance until he finally remembered

Once he remembered he went to go find you ASAP where you were hiding int he corner of the bedroom moping

He showers you with hugs cuddles kisses pecks, you name it he does it

He feels so bad that he could forget smtg like this, literally asks himself how he could forget such an important date

If the convenience store was still open he’d run to the nearest store and surprise you with a birthday cake. But not just any cake it’d be a cake that was decorated by the one and only Kim Sunoo

Would prepare it so nicely and even have a lit up candle so you can wish on it.

the type to surprise you with it even though he forgot. Brings it to your room while singing the hbd song.

Puts cake frosting on your nose #2, takes lots and lots of pictures to post on insta later

caption : “happy birthday sunshine~”

Jungwon :

he was on the couch as per usual just scrolling through his phone to keep himself occupied but also updated

Not knowing what day it was,,,,,,,

you come outside of your bedroom excitedly to expect a wishful happy birthday wish from the person you love most

But for some reason it oddly seemed like a normal day

“Wonnniiieee my loveeee, guess what day it is!” You said with a sheepish smile

“Hmm wednesday?” He said looking up at you with a calm face

Your happy smile soon became a little pout

“You really don’t know?”

“Isn’t it just a regular Wednesday? Why is there something special?”

oh my- he broke your heart right then and there

You run back into your room because you feel heated tears about to fall, even though it was something small the thought of him not remembering your birthday the day of your birth hurt. A little.

Jungwon was actually super clueless he genuinely didn’t know what day it is but something about you seemed off and the way you ran to your room was quite odd to him so he went and followed you

Before he opened the door he already heard small whimpers from the corner of the bed, and that immediately triggered him and he was about to beat up anyone that made you feel sad 😠 little did he know it was him who made you feel that way

“Baby what’s wrong? Why are you crying”

He holds your chin and turns it to get a better look

wiping your tears with his thumb, you were being a dramatic his giggles make you feel a bit better even though you were mad at him for forgetting

“You forgot my birthday.” You said to him while crying

You can literally see the gears in his brain start to turn when his face went from 😄 -> 😳

“IM SO SORRY IM SO SORRY” hugs you so tight that you literally can’t breathe

Doesn’t know what to do to make you feel better, “I’m really sorry for forgetting your birthday, I don’t really know what got into me, please forgive me.”< cue the cutest kitty puppy eyes

He kept on rambling on abt how he was sorry and deserves your forgiveness you literally had to shut him up, he was sorry please forgive him >~<

Cuddles you for the rest of the day

Niki :

He was playing video games normally on his phone, until you excitedly stormed into his room “hiiiii babbbbyyyy”

“Well someone is happy today :)”

“Well of course bc u know what day it isss ;)”

“Wednesday?”

😧😦 < that’s what you looked like when he didn’t know, “you really don’t remember?”

“hmm I’m not too sure” he said before going back to his game

you slowly became disappointed and just ‘celebrated’ your birthday by yourself in the kitchen. :,((

he didn’t notice that you were sad at first bc he was busy playing on his phone, around an hour later he went to the kitchen to get a snack when he sees you in the kitchen staring into space rested your chin on you arm.

‘Are you okay? You seemed fine earlier’

You decided to play the silent game and just avoided him... so he tried to get you to talk to him but after a while it didn’t work so he sort of gave up and went to ask his hyungs what’s wrong with you.

“Niki,,, it’s y/n’s birthday omg did you forget??????” Jake said texting niki

and that’s when the lightbulb in his brain turned on

He rushed to the kitchen and back hugged you so tight and gave you so many cheekie kissies to try and make up for ‘forgetting’

But to his luck you were still mad at him

Soooo he came up with the idea of going to the convenience store really quick to get you a bunch of flowers and a nice cake to surprise you~

You ended up forgiving him because he was tickling you threatening you to forgive him

N knowing Niki he’s not a person you can be mad at for long <3

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 112 & 113 (part 2)

I hate that this chapter is cut... mainly cuz it deals with the most “ horribly presented” theme in furuba anime.... grief.

-The shame of grieving: “ Rarely discussed theme in Literature”:

When a love one dies... ppl differ in how they deal with it. Some cry their hearts out, some become depressed & painfully lonely, others get angry or cynical, some might deny it, some move on quickly, others move on but years after the realization crushes them, others stay still... Above all, you feel ashamed of yourself if you didn’t move on or if you DID move on.. “ Sometimes ppl around you judge you for it... for your grief”

The later is the theme of these two chapters. Rarely discussed themes & it saddens me that it is cut. You see, Furuba anime doesn’t get grief  at all. To them, it’s a small part of the generic protagonist after she finishes her job of nurturing the real main protagonist. Mothers are strong, they help us cross the bridge between childhood & adulthood. Tohru, the show’s mom, did it so thoroughly & in slow visual & narrative details for yuki. Afterwards, the anime brushed whatever is left of her character, which the anime viewed as sheer suspenseful drama, & collected it thro 3rd person story-telling techniques in one ep “ se3, ep6″ & excessive monologue for 10 minutes in se3, ep9.

In this chapter, Kakeru, a side character, sheds light into this theme. Kakeru didn’t lose a parent by death, didn’t grieve, has no dependent familial bonds with either dead parents “ kyoko & komaki’s dad”. Yet, kakeru stood & judged tohru on how she “ should” grieve. Harshly tearing her down while she’s standing there lonely, trying to hide her shock at the loss of her only pillar in life, broken & traumatized, dealing with the pushed down traumatic feelings from her past where her mom abandoned her as a child..now her mom did it again, this time thro death.. & kakeru, rightfully not knowing all that, but wrongfully lecturing her on how to behave... kakeru isn’t a monster, but he only saw what he wanted: komaki & how the world should grieve with his lover, how he should be the hero protecting her. So self-centered, insensitive, horribly cruel & unbelievably conceited, but above all... what he did is so sadly common... it hurts.

-Judging Grieving People:

As I said many times.. grief is so personal, so unique to the person & as common as it is, so misunderstood. According to kakeru & many ppl I’ve sopken to lately, tohru should have acknowledged komaki. Komaki, the not-traumatized version of tohru, did the right “ tohru-like” thing. Not only felt sadness at the loss of her own dad, but found it in her heart to visit the other orphan, tohru, & give condolences & respect to the dead mother. Such kindness & purity. Very deserving of applaud: To not only see your pain but others’ as well. Tohru has always done the “ right, kind” thing to other ppl. When she can’t now, the author brought another “ tohru” to do the “ right, kind” thing.

Kakeru is so many ppl. During my brother’s funeral. I’ve heard so many gossip on how my mom should’ve stood tall & greeted the visitors.” Being silent , emotionless & non-responsive is not how you show visitors you value their kind words”, they said. How his widow should’ve collected herself & acted properly, respected his memory by taking proper care of herself & her kids. “Being a broken mess is not how you “ honor” loved one”, they said. Kakeru is indeed many ppl & that’s how you discuss a theme by creating characters who sin, screw up & be cruel, even if momentarily.

Kakeru is wrong. There is no “ you should have” in grief. There is no ounce of truth in his demeaning lecture to tohru & I respect komaki for her reaction to him so much. Kakeru did learn & grew from it, apologized to tohru even if he didn’t actually sought her to do so & even if she herself started the apology. But you see, these two chapters are 90% focused on kakeru as a character, his growth, thoughts, the mini focus on his relationship with komaki as an example of healthy relationship & all that is another lesson for yuki to observe & learn. He learned abt tohru’s past, kakeru’s personality & growth & got to observe another example of romantic relationship so yuki can grow as a man & approach machi healthily. But then again... nothing at all stops yuki/machi from being healthy, no past issues, no contradicting personalities “ they’re quite similar” & yuki is the only furuba character that doesn’t screw up big. He learns & teaches. He’s the personification of the author.

-Tohru.. stays a “ tohru”:

Tohru’s part is 10% of the this chapter which is fine as I think/hope it will lead into more tohru depth in the following chapters. But It is for this reason I’m glad this chapter was cut in the 13 eps season of furuba anime, cuz tohru doesnt have much depth in the anime due to the quick wrap up & the la~~~~st  thing I want is another 3rd person story-telling flashback abt tohru in the anime. Honestly, one of the most frustrating aspect to me of the anime & I’ll hold judgement abt manga- tohru till I reach its end. So far~~~ Tohru’s depth & character exploration gets better one chapter, then regress the next one, then moves on, the... it’s a fluctuating process. It has nothing to do with tohtu’s feelings.

you’ see ... kyo himself as a character with issues fluctuates a lot, he does sth good, then does sth bad, chooses right words, then makes a horrible mistake & chooses wrong! which is one of the most well-done aspects of character exploration that is rarely attempted by authors! I highly respect Takaya-san for what she’s doing with kyo in the manga so far. Other authors show us a character doing one big mistake & then he/she learns from it in a dramatic way. But Takaya-san, nope! she decided to approach it in a very human way, making us be frustrated with kyo’s repeated mistakes yet understands where he’s coming from! kudos to her!!

But I’m not yet satisfied with how tohru is portrayed in the manga & this has nothing to do with tohru’s character. Takaya-san is discussing rare themes thro tohru’s character. But what I mean is how tohru is approached thro the viewers/readers eyes. I wont judge until the last chapter. but this is the part that is frustrating to me.

Side Notes:

The flow of the 2 chapters is little off. We go back & forth between the past & the present, between yuki-machi & komaki-kakeru. Again, I’m so glad the anime cut it cuz, nope! they can’t handle such narrative. they’ll reorder it in a such heavily monologing way & insert the comedy abruptly to lighten the mood. Just look at how the comedy is inserted in momiji’s se03 ep!

Komaki is such a tohru with a sprinkle of kagura’s very softened outbursts. lol. she’s fun!

I’m liking yuki-machi interactions a lot. no drama, which is why the anime cut it -_-’, but it progresses healthily. Machi is yuki’s third-stage growth after (1) leaving tohru’s nest (baby yuki), (b) making friends with kakeru/someone who gets him (young boy yuki), (3) finding romantic love (being a man). The anime was so interested in the 2 stages above cuz that’s where the drama is & cut the third. Honestly, the anime didn’t have to include everything as there is never a space in 13 eps, but they certainly could’ve squeezed few panels or even made brand new very short yuki-machi scenes. but the anime weirdly decided after yuki “ saved” machi from her trauma by talking with her in her apartment, he should just marry her.... lol.. that’s why next scene is ep 5 momiji’s ep intro montage where yuki was abt to confess!!! making yuki-machi the least developed couple in the anime!

I love all furuba’s characters, but yuki, tohru, kyo & akito carry the big themes, therefore, I not only analyze their characters, but how the themes are presented thro them & how their presentation affects such themes. This might make it sound as I hate them or am harsh on them. not at all. It is the anime director/ manga author that I’m positively or negatively criticizing most times. Most importantly, my criticism is not the law. It’s just my perspective & my consumption of the material. Feel free to differ with me. I dont mind it. It brings interesting discussions!

When it comes to tohru’s issues... his chapter introduced nothing new. We have seen/read in canon repeatedly that tohru hides her pain behind a smile (heck! even kisa knows that & told us), that she cant stand up for herself much, that she smiles for other ppl not for herself. All this was presented thro so many characters already, which is why I understand the anime’s decision to cut it. What’s new? that yuki didn know tohru’s smile is mostly a mask & that kakleru has depth.

I love this chapter for the grieving themes it discussed that are rarely touched upon in literature, but since such themes are rarely presented, the anime’s decision to cut it, ironically proves my point! lol . They don’t get grief & so, they reduced it to se03 content & two eps worth. sad.. but expected. The anime is indeed another form of “past” kakeru: seeing one side of grieving person. The happy side.