#cursed embarrasses hirself

[aislesalmon]

Balkantalia in internet fights

“Nice argument. Unfortunately,”

[types up actual counter argument]: ����🇷

[types up incoherent rant full of emojis and profanity]: 🇦🇱

“I disagree.” : 🇸🇮

“you’re wrong+ratio” : 🇧🇦

“I fucked your mom last night” : 🇷🇸

“kys” : 🇧🇬

“I am inside your walls” : 🇷🇴

“your mom” : 🇬🇷

[doxxes you]: 🇲🇰

[blocked]: 🇲🇪

[unblocks you, makes another point and blocks you again]: 🇽🇰

[all of the above, in that order]: 🇹🇷

[aislesalmon]

Taking shot-in-the-dark guesses of the ADC crew’s real life situations, and leaving them here so I can compare them to what’s eventually revealed in the show.

Pomni - wage slave to a miserable office job run by people who treat her like shit

Jax - dickhead with no friends OR secretly sweet but acts like a dickhead to push others away so he doesn’t get attached and then lose them (again)

Ragatha - housewife trapped in a loveless (possibly abusive) marriage

Zooble - angsty teenager? starving artist? really not sure tbh

Kinger - marriage problems, possibly from the loss of a child, entered the Circus with his wife who became corrupted

Gangle - absolutely no idea but it’s probably gonna be super traumatic to make us feel bad for laughing at her instability

Caine - abandonment issues stemming from the program’s creator losing interest and leaving him, so he drags humans into the realm both to keep him company and to fulfill the purpose he was made for in the vain hopes it’ll bring his creator back (it won’t)

[aislesalmon]

i WILL watch the new movie in theaters and give myself a horrific migraine. i will do it.

[aislesalmon]

pros of circling back to the aph fandom: so much new balkantalia content

cons of circling back to the aph fandom: I am subjected to esc content for the first time in years

[aislesalmon]

literally all of the anime’s problems could be remedied by removing the Holy Quintet and spending that time focusing on the Magia Record original characters

[aislesalmon]

I love Promised Blood. I hyperfixate on them like nothing else. I have so many AUs, hypothetical seasonal events+units, and OCs for Promised Blood/the Blood Tragedy/Futatsugi City’s Magical Girls. I just counted and I have 58 OCs (most of which die in the Blood Tragedy), and I’ve put more thought and effort into them than I have any other group of OCs I’ve ever made. I have a jotlist for a fan-musical based on the Count of Monte Cristo that takes place in a timeline where the Blood Tragedy never happened. I legitimately think I may have put more thought into Futatsugi’s Magical Girls than anyone else in the world. Help me.

[aislesalmon]

VERY UNPOPULAR OPINION AHEAD but anime Alina is actually way more nuanced than game Alina. game Alina only cares about art. that’s it. that’s her motivation for becoming a Magical Girl, her motivation for becoming a Magius, and her motivation for becoming Holy Alina and trying to end the world. she doesnt care about liberation, she doesn’t care about Karin*, she doesn’t care about people’s expectations**, she just cares about making art. anything else is just attributed to her by fans. anime Alina expresses anger at Incubators taking advantage of Magical Girls and humans for (unknowingly) allowing Magical a girls to suffer for them. that’s way more depth than game Alina ever shows, lmao.

not that there’s anything wrong with game Alina’s characterization (aside from her abuse of Karin and her harassment of Mifuyu being treated as humorous and never called out) - i think it’s pretty realistic. some artists are just Like That.

*the only time she’s not insulting and avoiding Karin is that time in Karin’s MSS where she’s like ��here’s a reward for being less annoying than usual” and then IMMEDIATELY goes back to insulting her. that’s the closest they come to a positive interaction, ever. people assume Alina is a tsun who secretly cares for Karin, but she’s never actually shown to in canon.

**I don’t get why people assume this? she never shows any indication of caring what people think of her. never. she expresses frustration when her fame gets in the way of making art. that’s it. she doesn’t try to commit suicide after reading the critic’s message because she’s sad someone doesn’t like her work or fears the prospect of not being famous forever - she tries to commit suicide because she thinks it’ll be her masterpiece. the critic brought up some points (about her work lacking a theme, her work being addicting to people, and her possibly losing her edge with age like many other artists) she initially thought were valid, which made her want to make her masterpiece (and die) early rather than lose her artistic vision as life went on. the decision, like every decision Alina makes, is shown to be framed in terms of what Alina wants. the opinions of others are not factors in her thought process.

[aislesalmon]

Finding Nemu

[aislesalmon]

can we please, PLEASE get some healthy Alin@/Kar!n interactions in this new event, I want to like this pair SO BAD

(and for the record I’m not saying one can’t like unhealthy ships but greenpurple is sold like it’s a functioning relationship and the toxic bullshit Alina puts Karin through is never acknowledged and a lot of the fans genuinely don’t seem to realize how borderline abusive it is and it’s. frustrating.)

[aislesalmon]

funny that the “anime version” of Holy Mami is more accurate to her portrayal in the game’s main story than the original version, lol. as much as the game’s main story is watered down and sugarcoated (dancing around the fact that the Magius’ use of Witches and Uwasa cost countless human lives in Kamihama despite this being an obvious fact, claiming that no one died in the fights against Walpurgisnacht and Shitori Egumo despite the MASSIVE damage they inflicted to the city, etc), the units themselves are much more so. can‘t have people deciding a character isn’t “uwu waifu” material, right? they might - god forbid - not spend ludicrous amounts of money trying to get her!

[aislesalmon]

how is Karin’s halloween costume better (witchier, more magical girl-esque, more detailed, more coherent, and just more pleasing to the eye) than her actual magical girl outfit

[aislesalmon]

rewatching Crimson Resolve and wow a significant plot point really revolves around Ranka sliding into Ao’s dms

[aislesalmon]

Calling it now: Sarah Mirabilis (potentially ft. Mitama) is gonna go back in time and become the original Witch that starts gathering other Witches to become Walpurgisnacht

[aislesalmon]

Miyuri needs to be a healer with the ability to boost her teammates so we can reenact the Ubercharge scene from Meet the Medic with her and San, but with the Medic on rollerskates and the Heavy wearing the minigun as a hat

[aislesalmon]

the virgin game Mitama backstory vs the chad anime Mitama backstory

on the downside, it seems like they’re sticking with the game’s Tsuruno character development. you know, the whole “never mind the fact that Tsuruno never once attempted to communicate that she needed help AND ignored her friends’ repeated attempts to communicate that she was not helping them, it’s somehow literally everyone else’s fault that she’s stressed and she’s entitled to commit mass murder to relax uwu” shtick

[aislesalmon]

DAMMIT I wanted to do a Magia Record Event-type story about ascended!Madoka+Homura taking a vacation from godhood and going to the beach. It would’ve been based on a canon-divergent hypothetical Rebellion sequel so it wouldn’t exactly be Godoka and Homucifer, but still. Of all the ideas for canon to beat me to the punch on, I was not expecting “Goddess beach day”.