#current plan is to go in and ask 'can i be really pushy for a minute? ok? then lets go;

[altruistic-meme]

10 pages later, but i think im done with my list of issues for the doctor. gods im still soooo anxious about how that's going to go though ;;; i am hoping to be able to be pushy right from the start though because i really just don't wanna waste my time with a doctor who isn't going to listen to a damn thing i say.

[shouyuus]

popular host club host!keigo who's constantly the top 1 or 2 in his host club, so he's got a long roster of regulars, but one of them happens to be a good friend of yours who brings you in one day bc you're a bit naive and she thought it was about time you got out there in the world

host!keigo who is no stranger to shy little birdies, but still has a job to do, so he does his usual thing with your friend, asks about her part time job, compliments her new hairstyle, asks if she's gotten that one toner he recommended, before turning to you and offering you a smile and a wink, and is more charmed than a man in his profession should be at the way you turn red and refuse to meet his eyes

host!keigo who keeps it casual, wears relaxed, but chic street-style clothing and keeps his roots bleached well, but almost nothing else, except for the two slits of black he inks into his inner corners; says that they keep his eyes sharp so he can see all his favorite little birds at the club, of course. and suddenly, you can kinda see why your friend likes coming here so much -- the conversation is nice and he's never too pushy, but it's effortless, the way he talks about himself and gets everyone to talk about themselves as well.

host!keigo who's earnest when he asks you about your interest and feels himself smiling when you light up and talk about the things you love -- reading, painting, photography -- your friend cuts in that it's a shame you're too shy to ask him to be a model for one of your projects bc he does photograph really well, to which you blush even harder and keigo wonders briefly if there's something in the air or in the drinks today bc wow is he feeling just a tad lightheaded and from the looks of it so are you.

host!keigo who, when your friends goes to the bathroom, leans across the booth to hand you his card, just a black card with two bright red wings embossed onto the hard cardstock, runs a finger along the line of your cheek, tilts your chin up and says, "if you ever wanna come see me too... i'll make time for you, dove. all you gotta do is ask." but when u tell him, a little too honestly, that you can't afford him, he just looks at you with a little smirk and says "like i said, dove, i'll make time for you." and leaves it at that

host!keigo who texts you good morning and goodnight, who asks you if you've eaten, who, you're pretty sure, on his days off, pings you and asks you what you're doing. so you tell him that you don't have plans and he immediately calls to ask if you want to hang out -- he picks you up at the train station, wearing just a fitted black tee and some loose-fitted jeans, but even then, people are turning around, doing double takes, but he doesn't seem to notice, only grinning and jogging up to meet you, asking if there's anywhere you'd like to go

host!keigo who takes u to the aquarium and then to the park, where you do a few doodles in your notepad. he leans over to watch and even though your first instinct is to hide your work, you let him see it anyway -- something about him makes you want to trust him, and for once, you want to lean into that. he tells you that your art is beautiful, and you ask, before you can stop yourself, if you can draw him, "it'd be my honor, little bird."

host!keigo who makes you laugh by doing the most dramatic poses before leaning up against a tree and closing his eyes and you sketch him out, feeling your heart in your throat, but when you show him, he goes still and quiet, before asking if he can keep it. you nod and hand the sketch over, blushing bc he holds it like it's lost treasure, something he's spent his whole life looking for --

host!keigo who takes you to dollar karaoke, claps and laughs as you try to sing the current idol song, who is, unsurprisingly, fantastic at singing and tells you to pick your favorite song for him to serenade to you, who pays for all the drinks and never asks you to shell out a time; when you try to get the last round, he gently pushes your hand away and says "not today, little bird, i wanna do this so... let me."

host!keigo who, when you ask him if he does this with all his clients, bends down and flicks a bit of hair from your face before his eyes flicker down to your lips, says, "no... only the ones i really, really like."

host!keigo who offers to walk you back to the station but when you get there, he seems hesitant to say something -- when you gently ask about it, he lets out a tiny little laugh, shakes his head and says, "y'know it's weird -- all these years of being a host... i've never felt like this before but... you just -- god, how embarrassing, right? my whole job is to be good at talking to people and here i am, at a loss for words --" he pauses, runs a hand through his hair before turning back towards you with an earnest smile, "guess what im trying to say is... i spend all day tryna make people feel like they're special, like they're the only person in the entire world but... with you... it's the first time someone's made me feel like that and... i kinda wanna be selfish, be greedy and take you somewhere and keep you all to myself but..."

host!keigo who thinks he might be losing his mind when you smile up at him with that brilliant blush of yours and tell him that "if that's what you wanted... i wouldn't mind... if it were you."

[m1ckeyb3rry]

OK FINISHED YUKIS!! This is 5-9 also I’m realizing the overall title of the yuki section is “O Lord” and the first chapter’s title is actually “Honest” but forgot to fix that earlier in the summary oops. But enjoy!!! Gonna start working on Barou’s now

-Karasu anon

5 - The Peak of Happiness

When Kenyu entered high school, his life had been even more fulfilling than it ever was before. With his characteristic dribbling abilities and power to charge on, he became a regular even as a first year. He gained the name “The 1-on-1 Emperor” and became a the center of attention within the prefecture, a new member whom people expected much out of. Through hard work he produced results, and those results give him confidence in himself. His self confidence made him sparkle more and more. Somehow, that very aura had caught the eye of a photographer for a fashion magazine. Kenyu and his friends had traveled to Tokyo, in the process stopping by Harajuku.

“Hey you! Wanna be a model?”

“Huh?”

“What do you say you come join our agency? You’ve got this great aura.”

He has a nice appearance and has a glowing aura. Thanks to his beautician mother, his refined looks had caused him to stand out in the area. Kenyu politely refused

“Sorry, I’m just out here shopping with my friends. I don’t really have any interest in doing something like that.”

“Well, what if I just take one picture of you! Is that alright?”

Kenyu wasn’t sure what that “well” implied, but the photographer seemed really pushy.

“Sorry I can’t. Next month is the Japanese Nationals Championship. I’m afraid something like that would impede a bit.”

“Seriously!? You’re that incredible!? I’ve found a golden egg!” The photographer had let his ramblings slip, clearly getting even more hyped up. Kenyu’s friends came around to ask what was going on, wondering if their friend had just been scouted. He was originally planning on turning the photographer down, but since both his friends were so enthusiastic about it, he got caught up in the excitement. The photographer asked for his name, to which Kenyu gave him. Just like that, Kenyu was swept away into doing a photoshoot right then and there. Photographer asked what his future plans were to which he replied that he was trying to go pro and wanted to become the number one striker in the world. To Kenyu’s unwavering conviction, the photographer matched his enthusiasm. “That’s amazing! If anyone can do it, it’s you!” It wasn’t just lip service. Despite his initial impression, the photographer was also quite pure of heart. He certainly had the aura that made Kenyu think so.

A handsome soccer player egg. The pics of Kenyu were featured in a magazine geared towards the current decade’s male fashion scene. It seems it was widely well received. Next month, the editor and photographer purposely came all the way out to Miyazaki for a photoshoot. Kenyu had come to regularly appear in the magazine. The talent agency had reached out to him, leading him to ask his parents for advice. In the end, he signed with the agency. This time, he was shooting as a full body model and would be published on a full page of the magazine issue. Receiving praise for his looks and his athleticism, his previous popularity that was limited to his prefecture had expanded to the entire nation. After one look at him, girls would flock to his games from other prefectures bearing fan service handheld fans, forming their own military force to cheer him on. Receiving their support, Kenyu was honestly happy. They call him strong and amazing while he plays soccer and cool and handsome during his model activities.

Everyday was fun. And from those days, he established a core value: I’m, undoubtedly, one of the chosen ones. He’s made it this far in life, having been constantly watched over and chosen. If he lives honestly, following his heart, people will gather and connect. Thus, he will be blessed by the people. There isn’t anything he’s afraid of. He’ll live as he is, purely as himself. For now, all he needs to do is keep trying his best in soccer. Then, someday, he’ll be on the National team, win the World Cup, and become the world’s number 1 striker. Not once had he thought that this dream was overambitious. All he needs to do is believe. As long as he keeps living honestly, this dream, too, will surely come true. To be chosen, and to be watched over. God is watching over me. That’s what Kenyu believed from the bottom of his heart, without a hint of doubt. It was only after two years time that he had realized that was the happiest era of his life, in the season where the cherry blossoms scatter once again.

6- A Lifetime’s Worth of Tears

It was the spring of his third year in high school. Yukimiya Kenyu was the ace of Soranin High School, the year that would be their ticket to Nationals, Kenyu’s last year of high school. In his first and second year, he was a regular on the team. Both times they made it to Nationals, but lost after one match. But this year will be different. As ace and captain, he’ll definitely lead the team to victory. If they have the power of the 1-on-1 Emperor on their side, they can achieve it. He’s been waiting to be scouted to go pro too. If they win, they’ll definitely catch the recruiters’ eyes! To Kenyu, it was a future he didn’t have to worry about. After practice, he walked home with his teammates. Just in case it was to rain, practice was held inside the gym, though it didn’t make it any less grueling. His teammates noticed that Kenyu had paused, asking him what was wrong.

“Sorry…my eyes..it’s just…they’re kinda blurry.”

In front of him were his two friends, holding onto their umbrellas. The rain narrowed his field of view and the sky was already gloomy. But there was a darkness, different from that of the sky, that was blotting his vision. No, his field of vision was being eaten away by a black haze. His friends asked if he was okay, to which he tried to focus on their faces, but to no avail. They still remained hazy, and he couldn’t see them clearly. He thought a good night’s sleep would have it fixed by morning, but by the next day, his vision was still out of sorts. Kenyu’s vision had never been good, but it seems like lately, it’s been deteriorating a lot more. Just in case, he decided to visit an eye doctor at a large hospital. Surgery to fix vision does exist, so Kenyu wonders if that’s something he needs to consider if he wants to go pro. That’s about as far as he thought, but his diagnosis was something he never would’ve imagined.

“When you’re tired, your field of vision narrows and blind spots appear. You have optic neuropathy.”

He’s an old doctor, well known and reputable in the region, but with a kind tone of voice, he had straightforwardly informed Kenyu of his diagnosis.

“The progression of the disease cannot be stopped, accompanied by headaches and nausea, and in the worst cases…complete blindness.”

In the worst cases, complete blindness.

“But with proper treatment, we can slow its progression. For the most part, you don’t need to worry about going completely blind. You can continue living your everyday life and your model activities without any issues.”

The examination room was quiet. Even with the doctor’s kind tone and the slow speed he spoke, Kenyu was unable to process the information immediately. Blindness. Model. Everyday life. Kenyu had felt feelings he had never felt before. As if his legs had been crushed, it was a chilling feeling that sent shivers down his spine. For the first time in his life, he felt fear.

Pushing away his fears, he asked the doctor, “Um…what about soccer…..?”

The doctor remained silent for a moment, then proceeded to answer carefully, not letting is kind tone waver.

“You’ll be able to play it as a hobby…but if you continue playing as you have now while the disease progresses….honestly I think it may be a bit difficult…”

Kenyu’s legs shook and his hands turned cold.

“Unfortunately, I can’t say that the path to becoming pro would be extremely hard..”

The doctor’s kind voice. The cruel verdict.

Why…why me…

The shaking in his body had spread as his body ran cold.

“Doctor…I haven’t…done anything bad before..”, Kenyu had squeezed out in a wavering voice. He’d never done anything to make God hate him. All he did was try his best in soccer. He hadn’t done anything unfair or unjust. He just immersed himself in soccer, honestly and purely.

Why is it being taken…away from me…

Like a whining child, his voice was shaken with tears.

“I wanted to become number 1 in soccer…it’s not right…this situation….I don’t accept it…”

Holding his shaking body, he lets his tears fall. Once after the other, they poured like down his face as he collapsed onto the bed.

“Give me…back my dream…” I don’t care about anything else. He couldn’t bring himself to say those last words. The real Kenyu is shy and stoic. He’s a small boy who doesn’t talk to friends and sits quietly at his seat. He took up everything he had to lead that Kenyu to where he is now. He couldn’t believe that God would do something so cruel. The joy when he bought his first soccer ball. The day he played soccer with Cannavaro. The times he’d laugh with his teammates at soccer school. And up until just yesterday, when he had been trying with all his might to win the National Championship. To get on the Japanese National team, win the World Cup, and become the world’s number one striker, the version of himself he believed in just up until this very moment. It felt like everything was a distant lie. In despair, he doesn’t want to lose anything. His tears continue to fall with no end.

“Why…why..no…I still…”

Crying a lifetime’s worth of tears, he couldn’t stop sobbing.

“I know..Yukimiya.”

The doctor gets on his knees and places his hands on Kenyu’s shoulders.

“We’ll do everything we can. I’ll support your journey in becoming pro all I can. But your condition will progress. The time in which you’ll be able to showcase your skills is limited. Even with all that, do you still want to follow your dream..?”

Finally, Kenyu raised his head. He shouldn’t give up on his dream. It’s still possible.

“….Yes.” His tears had dried as he grabbed onto the small glimmer of hope.

God had once again….looked after me…

7-In my heart

From then on, Kenyu devoted himself to soccer more than he ever had before, because someday, he wouldn’t be able to play anymore. So in the limited time he had before his eyes fully deteriorated, he wanted to go all in. He couldn’t waste his time scrolling away on his phone or hanging out with friends. When he had free time, he spent it all running around or studying soccer tactics. I’ve gotta be more efficient, gotta perfect it, gotta do more….

It was very in character for one-track minded Kenyu. His stoicism, honesty, and determination all came together to realize the ultimate short-period training boot camp regimen. I don’t have time. To me…time….

“Hey, hasn’t Yukki been kinda scary lately?”, a teammate had commented while Kenyu wasn’t in the room. He had quickly gone home right after practice had ended. “I know what you mean. If you make even a small mistake, he gets pissed. It is our fault for causing slip ups though..”, a teammate, who got yelled at by Kenyu today to stay focused, shrugged in response.

“No that’s not what I meant….er how should I put this…he gets so angry it’s like he’s about to cry.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

A bystander who had heard their conversation interjected, expressing his agreement in Kenyu’s recent behavior.

“It seems like Yukki’s really in a rush, almost like he’s being chased by something”, the newcomer had said. He had been always honest and stoic, but now it seems he’s not as much so. In the past, he would walk home with his friends, chatting about pointless things. He’d even wave at his fangirls waiting at the school gates. Now, he didn’t talk to anyone unless needed, and he blatantly ignored his fans. He had no leeway in his life, and it was like he couldn’t see anything but soccer.

“What could he be running from? He’s been blessed with everything.”

Kenyu hadn’t talked to anyone but his parents about his eye condition, so no one knew about it. Talent, appearance, popularity, physicality. He had it all, so his teammates were couldn’t understand what was going on.

If I don’t hurry and show results….I’ve gotta find the fastest route to joining the National team..!…damn it…!….damn it….!!

When Kenyu got home, he reflected on today’s practice in the shower. His ideal play that would lead the team to championship victory, he couldn’t afford to have his teammates’ mistakes. Filled with frustration and haste, his body grew hot, but he knew this anger shouldn’t be poured all out onto his teammates.

Calm down…this..isn’t like me.

He reflected on the missed moves and took a deep breath.

I don’t know how many years I have left, but if I just live honestly, God will certainly watch over me. That’s why definitely…..” Definitely? Suddenly, Kenyu was scared. His dream of the World Cup felt too far. If someday his disease takes a turn for the worst, he might not be able to play soccer anymore. Hadn’t it seemed like God had casted his dream, his dream of achieving everything he could ever wish for, right into the pits of hell. But Kenyu had been discovered, chosen, and watched after. So surely, that couldn’t be the case. After he fulfills his dream, he would even be okay with quitting soccer. He lives now for the sake of that one moment of joy. But try as hard as he might, he wondered why he felt like he was falling deeper into a hopeless abyss. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to go pro with his own strength. And even if he manages to go pro, if he doesn’t play in the World Cup, then it’ll all be over. Maybe his hard work is all in vain. Maybe he should just quit while he’s ahead. If he gives up on soccer now, he could become a full time model. The staff at the agency had already tried to persuade him several times. He isn’t bound by just one path to the future. No….but….that’s not what he really wants to do. He wants to play soccer. He wants to be the world’s number one soccer player. Kenyu shook his head. Don’t hesitate. After all, he hasn’t done anything wrong. He’s put his all into doing my best. It’d be strange if there were no payout. He’ll fulfill his dream, surely, if he doesn’t give up now….but that was just a convenient delusion, some dreams do get destroyed. There aren’t any guarantees. He calmly told himself that, let the thoughts run around his head, and once again became rather scared. As if he’d been sprinting with all his might, alone, along the edge of a cliff, he was terrified. He was shaken, and tears welled up in his eyes. He couldn’t sleep. He was haunted by a horror-filled night. As if he were just clinging on, he watched heart-warming movies and listened to happy music to try and soothe himself. Even if the future stole soccer from him, “Soccer isn’t all there is to life”, is what he thought to himself. He reaffirmed is weak, insecure self with that reasoning, by hearing that that was okay, and then proceeded to look for uplifting music. The movies and music worked like a tranquilizer, calming him down, helping Kenyu somehow make it through day by day.

8- Story:

The preliminaries that would determine the prefecture’s representatives thus began.

“As expected of the 1-on-1 emperor!” “Yukki! Yukki! Yukki!” The fans, who knew nothing about his eye condition, yelled out their supporting chants as their team won their first match without a hitch. Before, Kenyu would smile back at the supporters, but now he didn’t have the time to spare to do so. If they lose, it’s all over. As that sentiment lingered in his mind, he was unable to sleep. The road from qualifiers to the national championship was a long one. His heart raced at the thought. But lack of sleep would accelerate his disease, so he wanted to get a full 8 hours of sleep. As his anxiety continued, he was still unable to fall asleep. The days where he was unable to fall asleep, awake until the sun rose, continued. One day, he thought to look for some white noise. He blearily picked up his phone and began to search and found the perfect playlist. Whispering vocals played along with a heartwarming melody. He had never heard this song before. Closing his eyes and listening to the music, he finally fell into slumber. He woke up the next morning feeling refreshed. From the song his listened to last night, one phrase remained in his mind. “God doesn’t give us trials we can’t overcome.” He didn’t know whose song this was. He doesn’t know if he really heard it or if he was dreaming, but that phrased became his crutch. Trials that we can overcome…he repeated those words over and over in his mind. To himself, that was crying, terrified at the thought of his eye disease. To himself, who hadn’t given up on soccer. The versions of himself that had seemed so scattered had come together and become one. “As I thought, God has been watching over me. God will never give me trials that I can’t overcome..” Both his weak self and his hardworking self had been acknowledged. It’ll be okay, he’ll overcome his trials. Kenyu had gained his confidence, stronger than ever before.

“How is it, Doctor…?” It was the day of his scheduled visit to the eye doctor. He was getting new glasses made and needed to get his prescription checked.

“They look good on you.

These are a pair of new glasses to commemorate how smoothly your treatment is going. It’s a good thing, maintaining it your condition. It’s by no means cured, but it hasn’t gotten worse…I think it’s safe to say you can continue carrying on comfortably and easily”, the doctor replied with a thumbs up. Kenyu was relieved. Everytime, he had been on the verge of tears, so scared to find out the results of his medical exam. This time, it was different though.

“Doctor…I’ve finally come to terms with my condition.”

“Is that so? That’s good.”

His heart had calmed. The doctor spoke in his kind tone, just as he always had.

“‘God never gives us trials we can’t overcome.’ That’s what I said, right? I was given this trial, and that’s why it must be destiny that I’ll overcome it.” As long as he doesn’t give up, he’ll surely fulfill his dreams. That’s what he believes. That’s his story.

From then one, he team steadily advanced. With his deadly plays, Kenyu lead the team through consecutive overwhelming victories. He completely overwhelmed other schools’ teams, ultimately qualifying for nationals.

Yes! First step complete. Perhaps because he had overcome his doubts, he was able to properly express his gratitude to the enthusiastic fans with a bow. He was able to share his joy with his cheering teammates.

But the real battle begins now. Winning Nationals, getting scouted, getting on the National team, winning the World Cup. If he takes them on step by step, he’ll definitely get closer to his dream. Though his time is limited, he can still see it. He can still fight! He can still…!

The next day, a letter from the JFU had arrived at Kenyu’s house. “You’ve been specially selected by the Japanese Football Union” it read. Yes, he got it….! His thoughts had become his conviction, and a refreshing smile appeared on Kenyu’s face. As long as he keeps pushing forward honestly, God with surely watch over him. Surely.

….God….no, Ego Jinpachi had been watching over him. To Kenyu, he couldn’t tell if this man was a god or a devil. The answer lies in Blue Lock. We’re still in the middle of Kenyu’s story. Just go, honestly, straightforwardly, with all your might. Believe in your dream of becoming the world’s best striker. Yukimiya Kenyu, with his unbreakable hope in his heart, smiling without a doubt, continued onwards towards the prison. What he didn’t know, was that within the confines of Blue Lock awaited an egoist (Isagi Yoichi) that he had never met before.

kenyu yukimiya ily 🥹 GET MY MAN OFF THE BENCH 🗣️ because i already loved him sm but reading these is making me just want to give him a hug 😭😭😭 my baby

[otaku553]

How goes the fma x albedo fic? I hope that doesn't sound pushy, I'm genuinely curious. And in that vein, do you have any little drabbles you may have written or want to write? Especially with your recent kny ocs/yourself and your siblings. That'd be super fun to read about! Your art AND your writing is so freaking good, the moment I see you've posted something new on your blog I'm clicking it so fast. Same with your ao3 account ❤️

Thank you for the kind words!!! Currently not working on any fics, since I just came out of 10 weeks of summer research where my days began at 8 am and ended at 9 pm for probably less than minimum wage hahaha (doing research is a Bit Sad but I get a whole month to relax before classes start again so thank goodness for that)

I do however!!! Have a lot of plans!!! If you’re interested you can read more below!

Plans include but are not limited to:

Finally working on Homuncular Nature again!! I definitely do have a lot of plans and cool scenes playing out in my head for the next chapter, it’ll just come down to when I actually put pen to paper (or stylus to iPad) to actually organize and write them all. The road block I think is that I have seen neither Albedo nor fmab very recently and all my concrete ideas are for around the 30 episode mark for fmab, the turning point with the first actual confrontation against father and the subsequent Briggs arc.

Rewriting Ten Thousand Maple Leaves! A lot of people have been very kind but I think I missed the mark with my first chapter to be honest. My writing has gotten a lot wordier and less succinct, which feels like I’m filling a chapter more with fluff and unnecessary description than actual content. I think I also dislike how I characterized Sanemi and how quickly Kazuha was willing to agree with things. Writing both of them is kind of a difficult challenge tbh! I think in rewriting it I want to give back to Kazuha more of his vagrant role in the games, where he is avoiding the law for reasons somewhat out of his control.

Ebisu siblings content! I think it might be fun to try having them interact with more of the canon characters in kny but I also think there’s some value in a complete sort of outsider point of view when inserting characters into a piece of media. I feel like whenever I see self inserts I see a lot of ocs making themselves indispensable and making meaningful relationships with existing characters that way and that’s totally valid! That’s a lot of what I do for crossovers as well. I think when it comes to my own ocs though, I want them to feel grounded in some form and the reality of it is that none of the characters I make based on myself or real people are that impressive or remarkable. But I also think there’s a lot of value in showing smaller scale things outside of the main interactions and plot to show that even though we aren’t remarkable, we still have our own meaningful connections and ideologies and stories :) in the end the Ebisu siblings are a lot more visual though so I may just continue making doodles and art without writing anything haha

Kirby & Meta Knight ageswap AU: I was mostly doing this on my ask-gikabi sideblog in short form comics, but I lost sight of what I wanted to do after making the discord and starting to interact with some of the people who followed it. I think a lot of people are inspired and have their own very cool ideas that I wanted to take into account but then eventually it was no longer my story or the story I wanted to tell, which is why I’m thinking of restarting it as a fic. This one is still in very rough idea stage though, I have honestly no clue how I’m even going to begin organizing it

Yanfei ace attorney crossover: this one’s just pure crack lmao I would definitely write it as crack taken seriously but I think this is fun to explore just for small ideas that pop up every now and then, i.e. yanfei is semi-immortal because she’s half adeptus so it would be Really Funny to me if she showed up in dgs era, got her attorney’s license, went into hiding after it became obvious that she wasn’t aging, and then re-emerged after rebranding herself as her own daughter or granddaughter. That, and I have a lot of fun imagining someone as pragmatic as yanfei trying to get through the sheer chaos of aa despite being otherworldly

Continuing winter weather advisory: I got to a really good point in that fic and was rereading it today like,,, damn I wrote that? And it would be fun to see where I planned on going with it so I do want to also try working on that a bit if I can

Kazuha & Kunikuzushi role swap au: this is something I posted about a Long While ago but it’s an idea I continue to be fascinated with :) I especially enjoy how these two characters could have had completely different roles and personalities depending on how their pasts happened (with wanderer being so nice and turning so bitter and kazuha growing up so spoiled (for lack of a better word) and turning out so weary and yet kind

Link click and mha crossover: this one is honestly just a very recent idea but I think it would be fun to make a drabble on how lightime photo studio would be able to continue operating even in another world and the trouble they might get into for illegal quirk usage and what using cheng xiaoshi’s powers in a world where being able to tell the future is canonically possible would entail

I have!! So many ideas!! And not enough time or motivation to actually write any of them most of the time :’)

But I’m very glad to hear that you enjoy them and look forward to my posts!! :D I really hope I can work on some of these over the last month of summer vacation that I have :)

[werebutch]

as respectfully as i can say this, i think it's unkind to say that trans people with different mindsets abt genitals don't have 'actual' dysphoria.

unless phallo/meta surgery outcomes advance a LOT in my lifetime i'll never be able to get a dick, so i've done a lot of work on my mindset in order to survive. just because i can talk about it/find a way to feel attractive despite my situation doesn't mean the dysphoria is fake.

i think you're a really nice and considerate person, i really don't mean to be a jerk or pushy or anything by this ask!

It was an admittedly rude joke + i understand that some trans people cant get or dont want some surgeries.. because i am one. im on the same page with you, i wouldn’t get phallo unless it advances and maybe not even at all. Truly have no idea bc im young. right now in my life i dont even plan to get my boobs fully removed because im dissatisfied with how plus size peoples’ scars currently look. So i understand. Genuinely appreciate this and not trying to sound sarcastic. Its really not my problem (and irl i dont make it my problem.. not to pat myself on the back but im an extremely pleasant person. And genuine about it. So i understand people assuming that im an evil fake bitch, but that is just not it LMFAO) but it greatly pisses me off to hear transmasculine people just straight up say that hormones and surgery are gross, or they dont want it despite being trans, i guess because of how badly i want it myself lol. I guess its good that people dont feel like they have to rush into transitioning but its just really really bizarre to me that a lot of transmasculine people my age are just straight up not wanting to medically transition at all. I think that they might want to unpack the reason for that. Its kind of like the immature feeling you get in school when you hear a classmate complain about a complete non-issue in their life, acting like its horrible, while youre going through your own actual hell in your own life that you have to keep quiet about… YOU KNOW LOL?

[britt-kageryuu]

Mikeys performing a ballet this stream. He's performing a heavily altered retelling of Princess Tutu, Shelldon and River helping, by playing necessary characters, and controlling the sets.

Mikey is currently at the point where it shifts from season 1 into season 2. They take an intermission, and Mikey still dressed as Princess Tutu starts talking to chat.

"I really need to actually figure out how to do the ending of this." He states while toweling off a bit, and since it was only his model dressed, not himself, it looked a little like he was randomly rubbing his sides.

Chat is singing praises of the production so far, especially since they had to condense alot of parts to keep in a time frame. Though some are exclaiming about the fact that Mikey doesn't have the ending fully planned Half way through the performance.

River comes over with parts of the Black Swan/Raven costume. "Well it can be done with some effects, but I don't think we can achieve the crow army that attacks you." She explains while putting the costume on. "I still find it weird that I'm playing Rue, and Shelldons Fakir," River pauses to try fixing the head piece that keeps leaning to the side, "But the alternative is him playing Muto, and we end up love interests. Which is a big NOPE from both of us!"

"If worse comes to worse, we just make cut this part way, and do a part 2 later." Mikey shrugs while taking a drink, "Alright everybody, let's run a poll on cutting this short, and doing a part 2 later, or just improvising the end. Starting Now!"

The poll pops up, and while that happens Mikey flops on a large pillow to rest a bit.

Shelldon flies in with a black wig and a little uniform on. He also flops onto the pillow.

"Dudes, I'm so tired, how much longer is this gonna keep going?" He complains while flapping his front limbs. His tail is loudly smacking the pillow in annoyance.

"Well the poll is almost done, so we may end this in a few minutes, or this might continue for maybe an hour?" River replied to her brother, while contemplating taking off the costume or not.

DING DING DING

"Oh the poll is over!" Mikey leans over to check the results. "Well, it seems a majority of you want us to stop, and polish up the ending instead of just winging it!"

Shelldon flies into the air shouting in joy while flinging off the costume.

River sighs, and calmly removes the costume parts she put on, "I guess this is preferable to it might not working out. Uncle M, what are we going to do for the rest of the scheduled stream?"

Mikey thought it over for a minute, "How about we make a quick mock up, and how chat give their opinions?"

"Okay, let's grab the right equipment for this!" River agrees, before turning the stream to a BRB video of the cartoony turtles popping in and saying random turtle facts. Like 'Red Eared Sliders actually tend to be very pushy, bossy turtles, which might explain some things!'

Chat is enjoying the video reel. And asking if this was part of Mikeys past commission.

----------------------

Masterpost

I looked up a few different Ballets, because Swan Lake is popping up alot already, but couldn't find any that would work, so Princess Tutu a somewhat abridged ballet.

[ymnfilter]

Hey I'm new and I'm a huge doctor who fan, You do not know much of a shock it was to go on to the Rose/Doctor tag and just see a basically a 100K story I got so excited! Until I realized it wasn't complete, So I'm jumping on here before I get by hopes up too much—because unfortunately I read the one shot where the doctor is a simp in all regenerations And I adored it, Like normally in these stories when they meet out of order Rose is the one falling in love and he's the one with all the info Which adds a difference to them power dynamic that I never liked. But I love the twist on it. And I always adore the doctor as a simp for Rose in any context! is this just you reposting an old story that you don't intend to finish or reigniting an old passion for an old work? And please don't take this the wrong way, I am in no means trying to be nosy or pushy. And I'm truly sorry if this comes off that way! (You can't really get tone from text, So I'm always a little bit nervous when asking these questions) Thanks for answering if you can! 😁

Hii!!! It has been a while since I've been able to go on either ao3 or tumblr. (Life got in the way big time 😬😬) When I logged in yesterday, I saw that there were a bunch of messages asking about my dw fics, daffodils in particular,

I honestly thought, at the time, that deleting those fics was the right thing to do. I had given up on becoming a writer, and i did not want any reminders that would make me feel bad for giving up.

It was such a stupid decision, especially since I did end up writing again, and now am alhmd writing professionally.

There were wayyy too many asks in my inbox for me to answer them all, and some were so old that I would just feel awkward replying to them all. So, instead I mass uploaded all of daffodils that I had saved on my drive.

I do miss writing for the dw fandom, but I am also currently working on an original fiction that takes up most of my brain space. I remember daffodils in particular took a lot of time to plan and write. I cannot definitively say if I will update it or not. I'm sorry I can't give you a straightforward answer.

Though, I will say I did leave the fic on a good enough note that you won't be frustrated by a cliff hanger or anything like that even if it takes me a while to update.

Again, thank you for reading my fics!

(To all the people who did write to me about the fics, I am so sorry if it felt like I was ignoring you. I saw most of the submissions just yesterday and the first thing I did was reupload daffodils. I will also reupload all the rest of the fics in due time. Thank you for reading. You guys have literally made me the writer that I am. I love you, and though I could not answer you all individually, just know I read every single one of your asks, and I will try my best to be a lot more active on here from now 😘😘)

[trkstrnd]

Ya know, i find interesting that once Carlos realized TK was "the one," he really just fully assimilated into the 126 crew and TK's circle and just kind of checked out whatever and whoever was left of his past personal life. It's almost like he was searching his entire life for the life line that he had and then that was it for him.

It's just real interesting to me, because it kind of actually really unhealthy to do that (or it is in real life)- BUT, I do think with TK, it's the only time he has EVER been truly happy.

i agree with you nonnie

and this may not be something that you might be looking for, but i feel like this is a perfect example of why i am pretty positive that carlos reyes is autistic.

i guess tw fan headcanoning mental illness but i have done such a dive into this as an autistic person myself.

i don’t know how it happened, but i’m pretty positive that carlos is my special interest, so when i look at him, i like to break down and analyze every facet of him and his character.

this means who he is how he dresses how he acts what he does, and this current canon plot (even though i hate it), really hammers it home for me.

carlos always grew up different, too “soft” for gabe. he was constantly outcasted by his family, and now by canon standards we are pretty sure he only had one friend in school (that we know of). so when we look at all of the things that went into this (shitty ass) plot point, we see the following.

-outcasted

-low support system

-loner

-people pleaser

-one really good friend

-acting out in ways that will make him fit in.

when you look at these together: they form a mask.

carlos has been masking his entire life, trying to be big and strong for his dad, trying to be the perfect son for his mom. he had one single friend who knew everything about him and he never really branched out because he was afraid of inconveniencing or burdening other people. his entire past life was one big neurotypical comphet mask that he lived until he found tk.

he’s absolutely terrified that any small minute shift in that mask will ruin things with everyone he cares about. it’s why he told his parents tj was his friend, and why he deflected when to got upset and asked why. he didn’t know what his reaction would be, so he took the only way where he knew the outcome. he knew tk was going to leave either way, but if he refused to tell him the truth, then the truth couldn’t disappoint him.

furthermore, he’s hyperexpressive (another learned trait in his masking) and he sometimes lets it slip for just a second, and something comes out (2.08: “but you seemed so happy.”). he tries his best to react normally in high stress situations, but it’s a lot more difficult in their personal life because he feels safer with tk and feels like he can be himself around him (2.13, the specific expression he has when tk tells him that copper is at the door), but when he’s in work mode, the only thing you’ll get from him most of the time is a jaw clench.

and he’s not fully unmasked around tk all the time. he’s getting there, but the rage punching was a perfect example of him not necessarily knowing how to regulate or process his emotions, so they manifest into rage and he takes it out on the punching bag.

and HOO BOY he stims. he rubs his hands together, rubs his knees, tends to clasp his hands in public or cross his arms.

he also hyperfixates on things to a point where it can get unhealthy at times (3.05, watching that nanny can until the /sun was up/, not sleeping?). it’s why he’s a good cop and possible detective. he’s pushy and not easily distracted and he doesn’t let anything get in the way of what he wants, because he’s chasing the dopamine.

he hates when his plans are derailed or ruined. he knows when something is wrong because he’s good at picking up patterns in people since he is so hyperaware. it’s a defense mechanism.

he also has a hard time understanding nuanced situations like cooper and the whole friend from work debacle. he tends to over or under react because he’s not sure how to navigate the situation and his feelings.

and finally, relating back to the ask, i agree that carlos never was truly happy until he found tk, because tk kind of helps him navigate the world that is good for both of them. the perfect example of this is in 3.18, while he’s trying to give the speech, and paul and marjan and nancy interrupt because they know where it’s going. carlos looks like he’s about to murder someone for a split secind and he whispers something to tk, but tk is giddy and squeezes his hand because the message was received regardless of the heartfelt speech.

tk is his lifeline. he helps him navigate and understand the world around him, and carlos is able to be his fullest and truest self with him.

i think you’re right, nonnie. he wanted to get rid of his life before because he finally found something worth living for.

tl;dr: carlos reyes is autistic and never fit in until he found tk and realized he doesn’t need to fit in to be loved.

[ohmotherwhereartthou-if]

Just curious and I really don't mean to be pushy, so if it comes across that way I'm really sorry

with the next update, will the albino options not be grayed out anymore?

Hello,

Your not pushy, no worries. Always feel free to ask me anything.

The next update mainly has a new scene and revamped stat screen.

For the physical trait options, I need to get further in the story then go back and write the unique options, interactions, dialogue, and flavor text. So sadly no but they will be filled in when I finish the prologue. The good news is from what the current plan looks like, once the Inn scene is done; it's the Santuario arrival, then the development years, and the prologue is done.

So hopefully it won't be too long before I can get around to those.

Sorry it's not a completely positive answer, I hope you stick around for when that update does come!

[keiyaku-tako]

*In a kelp envelope that was delivered from the coral sea*

Darling Azul, it's been awhile since you sent me a letter and I'm starting to miss my little boy. When are you playing to come back for break? I was thinking of making your favorite food 😊. Oh dear How shellfish of me I haven't even asked how you're doing. How is school treating you? Have you made any new friends? And how are those two mischievous eel friends of yours? Sorry if I'm being a little pushy I just miss my little octopus sooo much! And to tell you the truth I've been worried recently because it seems like all the photos of you as an adorable little kid all were mysteriously stolen or vandalized in such a way that you aren't in them. I'm running low on paper so this is where I have to end things off but remember that mom loves you and always will

-mom

Ps. I remember you mentioning plans to start a business called mostro lounge based off of that old mertail I used to tell you all the time. How's that going?

Dear mother,

Thank you for sending this letter; I've been meaning to write, but I've been busy with school and my extracurriculars. I'm planning on coming back during spring break if I can; winter break isn't the best time for me to go home, after all. And you really don't have to make my favorite foods - I don't want to give you any more pressure.

School has been interesting, to say the least. This year's first years are very intriguing, and I'm looking forward to getting to know them more. As for Jade and Floyd, they are the same as always; they create huge messes that I have to clean up. Though Jade is the more sensible of the two, so he only does this for his own amusement, I suppose...

And there is no need to worry, I understand why you feel like this - you've always been like this since I was a child.

And, as for the thing about the pictures... Who knows. I certainly do not know what could have happened to them.

Do not worry about sending me letters often; I know they cost a lot, and you shouldn't waste it on me. You should focus more on the letters you send for business as we will be able to talk in length when I go home.

Mostro Lounge has been going pretty well. I think I started it up a couple months after the last letter I sent you... Most of the people in my dorm - including Jade and Floyd - work there. It's a really big business in school - even rivaling the school shop sometimes. I am currently hoping to be able to open a second location somewhere in the school to gather more business. The things you taught me when I was younger helped tremendously with this.

I hope you are well and happy, and I truly am happy that you sent me this letter.

With love, Azul Ashengrotto

[attollogame]

Hello! I’m a long time fan of attollo and I had a bit of a difficult question to ask you. I know the real world is very time consuming so I completely understand that you may be unable to finish things, especially with what you’ve mentioned going on in your life before. Though, I am also an active patreon member, and I was wondering if you have plans to continue some of the things you’ve made announcements for but never completed. I really hope this doesn’t come off pushy or negative I don’t have those intentions sending this at all. For example: the birthday specials, valentine’s day specials, and the recent ovo camp stories have never been completed nor have you given us any updates on them. I wouldn’t be so bothered, but I have been supporting you on patreon and was hoping to at least understand what’s going on with the content I was really looking forward too! I am only hoping for you to address this! I really adore you, your content, and attollo so very much.

Hi! First off, thanks for being a supporter for so long; every bit matters in the long run, and I really do rely on the patreon to assist in financing the monthly bills. Although I would have preferred you contacted me via the patreon channel on discord or dm's on patreon, as this does discuss content that is patreon-centric (and I do ask that you do so from here on out for any patreon-related concerns), I'll still address everything here for now.

The specials and the valentines specials are all public versus patreon-specific, so although I am trying to find the time to sit down and complete these, I am finding it hard on top of actually getting updates done for the game itself and dealing with grad school concerns. The only thing I can say regarding those is that I will likely cease making interactive-related content for the time being and focus more on short stories for events, especially for this year where there are a lot of things going on for me. The current content will be archived and when things die down again I will gladly return to them for their completion, but for the duration of 2023, expect short drabbles instead (like the OC kiss week, for example, which will have SFW public and NSFW on patreon). I also do struggle at times to actually find inspiration or motivation for work, so I do have to combat that (constantly) on top of everything else, which I apologize for.

In terms of the Ovo stories, I asked on patreon whether people were interested and didn't receive much feedback on the matter, so I was unsure of whether people wanted me to continue it or not, especially considering the level of interaction the content received to begin with. I also do believe I did address this matter on a patreon post. Please be sure to double check update posts, as I often address anything relating to patreon stories on those atop game updates themselves.

I will say, it's hard for me to judge at times whether people care for the content produced or not if I don't hear back from the readers. Fortunately, some people did express interest when I initially inquired, so I'm hoping to complete that [Ovo content] when things die down for me as well, but I can't give you a concrete date of completion (much like I can't give concrete dates for updates).

So tl;dr if you made it this far: consider the valentines and birthday interactive stories on hiatus for 2023, as they will be substituted for short stories instead as I settle into grad school. If people want me to continue the Ovo stories please, seriously, let me know so I actually know you're interested in them as writing up to 20k of extra content is really draining if it's not being read.

Patreon will be getting short stories again as I ease back into things. $15 supporters will also receive a short drabble of their choosing. Right now, short stories are easiest for me on top of writing for the game itself as I can get the content done faster as I navigate grad school. I'm incredibly sorry if this isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's the best I can offer right now.

[primal-con]

Really freaking sorry if this comes off as annoying or pushy, but I was wondering how often you’ll update ‘A Different Kind of Rescue’? I really hope this isn’t a pressuring ask and I know writing can be time consuming and that you have your own life to tend to- but I also love your story and wanna keep tabs on its activity ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

Don't worry, you're not being pushy at all! Honestly it really warms my heart to see people actively following my story even between updates <3

All in all, I think new chapters can be expected monthly (give or take). I'm in the middle of an unusually hectic time, as in sounds completely made up or like the plot of some half-baked drama hectic, which is the main reason I don't have as much time to write currently. Work, social life, and unforeseen circumstances have been putting the hurt on my chronic fatigue. But once things calm down I'll be able to write a bit more consistently!

Regardless, I really enjoy working on A Different Kind of Rescue. It's been a fantastic writing challenge and fanfic is something I've really missed so I have no intentions of stopping it any time soon. I have Tons of stuff planned, things will just be slow going these first few chapters so readers should expect gaps. In the meantime though, I absolutely encourage sending asks about the fic! Even when I've got little time for writing, I'm more than thrilled to keep the conversation going! Thank you for asking :D <33

[shdwtouch]

blog updates. (long post ahead orz)

oki ! I'm back from my hiatus, had some time to think about things and reassess my current feelings / standing. currently my anxiety levels are pretty low, but I'm going to be talking to my therapist tomorrow about it + asking my doctor if I could go back on an as-needed anxiety medication since its been so bad lately.

right now the biggest anxiety spike I have is over writing this post heheh but I'm feeling okay, doing my best to keep thinking positive thoughts.

I'm definitely not leaving, but I am gonna try to enact some changes going forward. and, well, fight the urge to remake cuz I know its just my flight instinct. I tend to hide from things that stress me out and make me feel bad, and I know that is a shitty coping mechanism. I know I need to do better for myself if I'm going to survive and grow and become a better person who can manage things and be dependable.

anyway, sorry for the word vomit. time for the planned updates.

first, I will be going partially queue based. I've been managing to keep my queue stocked, I hope I'll be able to continue to do so. answered drafts will potentially be put into my queue, depending; I may still post them as I do them. asks will be posted as normal. I will still be posting as normal & occasionally reblogging content as well. in general, I just want to vary what I'm putting into my queue.

next, with the above in mind, if me posting ooc as primary activity is going to be a problem, please unfollow / block me. this has been an issue for some in the past, and while I don't begrudge people their preferences I have always run my blogs in this way. I post a lot of ooc, whether its personal stuff, me discussing meta, or whatever else. if that is a problem then you are encouraged to leave.

I refuse to guilt myself for not being active ic, and I would hope as my roleplay partners & friends folks would respect how I run my blog and value me as a friend & person over what I can provide in terms of ic engagement and content. I feel like a broken record at this point, but I am slow and post a lot of ooc. this isn't new ! I have this stated in multiple places, it should not be a surprise to anyone !

next, another recurring mention is that I am forgetful as fuck. going forward I will be blocking blogs that I have followed and did not follow me back. why ? because every day I see blogs on my dash, look at them, and wonder... have I followed this blog before, or have I just seen them on my dash a lot ? its nothing personal, but I just. don't want to deal with the anxiety of "have I followed this person before, didn't get followed back, unfollowed them cuz they are mutual exclusive, and if I follow them again now are they gonna think I'm being pushy ?"

in this age of mutual exclusivity it just. isn't worth the stress to me. part of why I hate being mutual exclusive, tbh. frankly, I would think it A+ if folks just. blocked me if they didn't want to interact with me / if they are mutual exclusive and don't intend to follow back. I'm learning to cope with it, truly. like. I know I shouldn't assume people block me for a bad reason or cuz I made a bad impression; I frequently state that people should block to curate their space, not just cuz folks are toxic or whatever. I even assure that I block for primarily benign reasons, like this, so why should I jump to conclusions about why people block me ? why should I care ?

next up, speaking of blocking. I recently had a series of experiences that just. left me feeling really shitty. in general, I do my best to be a good, empathetic person. I value transparency and open communication, and if there is a problem I want to resolve it with the best interest of everyone involved. I do my best, truly. but. these experiences have made me realize that I... waste a lot of energy being the best person I can, worrying and working towards conflict resolution while the other party just. does not care, or doesn't respect / value me enough to try for a solution.

for the sake of my mental health and self-esteem... going forward, if I feel like I am being disrespected, or the vibes or off, or I just. don't see anything coming of my attempts... I am not going to keep expending my time or energy. as much as it literally fucking pains me (I mean seriously, I don't want to do this, because I want to give the benefit of the doubt and be a good person, I want to fix problems, not let them lie. I don't want to turn my back on being open for communication and resolution.), I've made the decision to begin (attempting, at least) to block folks who I feel have crossed my boundaries, disrespected me, treated me or others poorly, or have failed to behave in a civil, adult, and mature fashion.

okay, now just a couple brief points:

I'm working on making muse specific ask memes / interaction prompts. I proposed this idea a longass time ago but never did anything with it, but I hope it will help facilitate interactions, provide some inspiration for folks at the very least a starting point. they'll be generic but specific to my muses, and always available.

I will be posting an interest track / permission post, which will be required to interact going forward. kinda like a mains call, but it'll basically just be a like if you're okay with [insert info on how I run my blog] + are okay with my contacting you ooc, sending asks, etc + commenting with whether you're interested in shade or kaey or both. I'll link it in my rules and it'll, hopefully, provide me with the solid verification my silly little anxious brain needs to not feel like a bother.

I will be conducting another inbox + draft clear out; anything deleted from my drafts will be listed in a post with a ping so my partners are aware !

I will be dropping all current inbox, plotting, and shipping calls because, well, I lose track of them so easily... and then I get nervous that its been too long, so yeah. I have a to-do list now tho ! and I hope that will help me keep track of things, DMs specifically, cuz I... know I suck at keeping up with those, especially in regards to plotting and discussions. my sincerest apologies to everyone, I assure you it is not personal and literally just me being forgetful and nervous heheh

all calls will be limited to 2-4 going forward, so I don''t overwhelm myself. some will be first come first serve, others will be at my discretion.

I will be updating / expanding both kaeys lore and shades modern universes, with the intention of eventually moving shade towards becoming fandomless. I love her content for bg3 but as a whole I just. don't feel very good in the bg3 rpc ?? I feel like an outsider and the vibe just. isn't vibing for me like it once did. again, this is something I am working towards, not something that will be changing right away. and when/if it does happen, she will keep her bg3 universes. as far as kaey goes, I'm gong to try to integrate his different universes a big more. uwu; again. maybe this time I will get the puzzle pieces to fit, but we'll see.

working on a new blog for lore development / rp projects. you can preview the proof of concept at puffiary, if you're interested. I'll also be working more on my multi ! myk will potentially be moving to my mutli, or the new project blog, but I'm not certain yet. dunerook will be keeping her own blog, for now.

anyway. those are my thoughts and feelings regarding stuff. sorry for the long ass post, I didn't intend for it to be like this but ya'll also know me. I can't keep things short and simple to save my life lmao

I will be updating my rules with some of this, but in general the vibe ya'll should get from this post is that I am taking steps forward, but I'm going slow. I have plans and intentions to improve stuff. good things are coming, I'm manifesting it now. but. I also just. want to feel safe and comfy again. that is my first priority.

anyway. thanks for reading this whole thing. sending love !!

[vamosaespana]

Feeling Hot Hot Hot 🥵

Today we awake in Seville. The plan is to take a walking tour of the historical area of Seville in the morning with a planned tour of Alcazar later in the afternoon. We scheduled the tour for 10:00 thinking that would give everyone a chance to sleep in a bit before we headed out. GB had planned on getting the rental car this morning so that we were ready for our drive tomorrow to Tarifa. He took off and I worked on getting the house put together and usher the Branson ducklings making sure they were up and ready. Can never remind them enough about brushing their teeth 🙄 I remember GB had told me to have my phone nearby in case he called but somehow that went in one ear and out the other as I got the house ready. I am super anal about beds being made in the morning. It’s just how I was raised. The kids and GB give me the hardest time but for me I am not right the rest of the day if I my bed isn’t made. There have been times where I’ve been gone all day and GB was the last to get up…he never makes the bed ever. I will literally make the bed when I get home just to get back in a made bed a couple hours later…it’s that bad 🫣 Well needless to say GB did call, MULTIPLE TIMES, and I didn’t realize it till I went down to the first floor. Apparently he needed a pic of his passport at the rental car place and was waiting for me to call him back…oops my bad 😣 I quickly took a photo and sent it in WhatsApp hoping that wouldn’t damper the mood. From then on, the phone was right next to me.

We had discussed that the kids and I would meet him at the meeting point that the tour guide stated “La plaza Triunfo.” Our plan was to leave the house at 9:00 giving us plenty of time to catch a cab and be at our meeting spot well before the 10:00 tour. GB was going to get the car signed in but leave it at the train station to avoid parking. He then was going to grab a cab and meet us at the plaza. We had no problem locating a taxi and he dropped us off right outside the plaza. Thank goodness we had some time as the kids were getting hungry. I don’t know about your kids but my kids are not breakfast eaters. They really don’t get hungry till around 10/11. We try time and time again to make them eat something in the morning but 9/10 times they leave the house early without eating anything. This definitely was no exception. But again, we had time, so I guess ice cream for breakfast it is 🤷🏻‍♀️ it was already getting pretty hot and humid so the ice cream really hit the spot in cooling the kiddos down. By now it was 9:45 with no sign of GB…that’s odd because he should have arrived sooner as he was closer. I can see groups starting to meet up at the plaza and people with tags around their neck signifying they were tour guides. No GB. I finally get a phone call and he says he is by the horse carriages. Perfect! I see the line of them. I walk over but no GB 🤷🏻‍♀️ I return back to the plaza and something told me to ask this woman if she was waiting to meet a family for a tour. She states no…she is waiting for someone by the name of GB. Oh boy….I explain to her that we are her tour which is great but that I currently have no idea where my husband is. She laughs and says let’s take a selfie and I will send him the pic to let him know we found each other.

Our tour guide was excellent yet again! She was a mom of 2 who was in school for history and uses this as a way to make money while using what she is learning. She knew so much about architecture and the history of all the different barrios within the historical center. A lot of people within the city also knew her which was pretty nice. There were times that people tried to hand us stuff or barter with us on trying to come inside to buy things but once they saw her they changed their pushiness. Pamphlets were put back in their pockets and people didn’t harass us. They were all excited to see her and talk with her, says a lot about her lovely personality. She also knew secret places to enter using offices and homes to sneak in so we could see beautiful rooftop views of the city.

She showed us inner rooms of offices that still had remaining parts of the wall of the city with its detail historic of the moors.

She took us to a beautiful park area that was donated to the city from one of the royal family members. Her one mandate is that she wanted to have areas for learning, little libraries if you will, so that people could come and read/learn amongst nature. She had fountains and seats built around bookshelves where people could leave books for others.

We saw the Plaza Mayor which was built explaining the history of Spain and had pictures of each region/city in Spain in alphabetical order. I found the region of Leon so I had to take a pic with the kids for my family. I knew my parents would get a kick out of it being that my maiden name is Leon.

In the center of the plaza is a huge outdoor auditorium where artists will put on concerts. Our tour guide was super excited that she got tickets to see Ricky Martin in a couple weeks….that I’m sure will be an awesome show and I’m not gonna lie I was super jealous. I also saw y hat Gypsy Kings were coming on Saturday but was bummed as that was the day we were leaving for Valencia. Seeing a concert in Spain would have been pretty awesome…guess I’ll just have to come back😁

We wrapped up our tour and thanked her for an amazing time. We asked her about giving us another tour on Friday and she said she would have to look at her calendar but would really try to make it work 🤞🏼 The traditional cheek kisses were given and we said our good byes. It was funny seeing the kids react to the cheek kisses 🤭

When she left, everyone looked pretty sweaty and red in the face with the big question being “where are we going to eat?” As we walked around to our right there was a cafe to sit down and recharge. They had small sandwiches, smoothies and shakes which everyone seemed to be happy with. We are finding out on this trip that 2 isn’t a big fan of the ham ibérico which is truly unfortunate as most places this is their go-to sandwich. It honestly is yummy and hits the spot especially on hot days with it being a lighter meat. GB, on the other hand, reaps the benefits eating all the ham that is on her sandwich. 3, on the other hand, is all things chocolate 🍫 With her, we need to force her to eat some sort of meal-like food before getting her chocolate. The girls got fruit/ protein smoothies while 1, GB and I ate ham and cheese sandwiches. And yes, 3 got her chocolate Oreo milkshake. She did split it with 1 but unfortunately 1 was under the impression that he had to go through the top of the shake to get to the bottom so she was none too happy to see that he had drank pretty much 3/4 of the shake 🙄 Ugg older brothers 🤨 To be fair we were due for a spat as it had been couple hours so I wasn’t too surprised but still very mom annoyed of why can’t we just behave😒

Now that we were adequately fed and hydrated and somewhat satiated with chocolate we had to figure out how to get back the plaza where we started as that was where our Castle tour was. Now GB is the only one with internet access on this trip. He had a heck of a time setting it up in Barcelona but it just made sense to pay the price for one as it wasn’t cheap. The rest of us could join WiFis as able which definitely cut down on the phone use of snapping and texting, that I was grateful for! But in situations like this, GB is the only one with internet to use Google maps to get us directions walking back to our location. Again GB is amazing but his reading of google/Apple Maps is not the best and he gets turned around easily. Give him a map with streets I have no doubt he will get us there but all the things on google/Apple and where they have you turn just turns him around and throws him off. Not to mention, street names aren’t as easily visible as they are in the USA. At this point it’s about 104 degrees outside and we need to walk about 20 minutes back to the castle. The neck fan for GB was left at home but again in this heat I don’t think anything would have made a difference. We make it back to the castle after lots of “active discussions” (we’ll just go ahead and use that phrase) as the map was trying to have us cut through areas that were not allowed for the public to go through. Our tour guide, knew all the ins and outs of where to walk for short cuts. This walk back to the plaza felt like 5 hours. We did arrive with time to spare allowing us time to buy some water and try to cool off. Now our time for our tour says 2:30 but they will only let you in 15 minutes prior. GB arranged for a private audio tour of the inner rooms of the castle to see where royalty sleeps. He showed the tickets multiple times to security and they kept turning us away…legit they were hard stopping on no more than 15 minutes early. It was to one point where GB went and was told nope you have to wait 1 minute 😧 Well we waited our minute and then he allowed us through to the ticket check. The woman takes our ticket and looks at it and says you better hurry your tour starts soon and you might miss it….are you kidding me lady???? You and the security guy obviously need to have a chat as we were here 30-40 minutes early and we kept getting turned away. So here we are again mad dashing to the area of the royal chambers hoping we make our tour. We show up at the chambers and the guide sees us running and red in the face. We explain our situation and she quickly calms us down. She tells us we are fine, no rush, you are here and all is good. She literally has us all take a deep breath and smile. I almost want to cry. I just want to take her home with me and just keep her in my pocket, having her come out when we are all stressy bessies. She had such a calm mood about her and helped us reset our moods. We get our audio guides and are told we are not allowed to take anything in with us as these are areas used by the royalty today. No pictures, bags, purses��nothing. We lock our things in lockers and off we go. The rooms and ceilings were absolutely breathtaking! Ceilings and doors hand carved from wood with such intricate designs and walls of inlaid tile by hand. We were able to see the rooms where visitors are greeted by the king and queen of Spain. We were able to see where past kings and queens of old slept but unfortunately only saw the doors to where the royal quarters are today for the king and queen. The tour itself took about 45 minutes but the nice thing was is that it was air conditioned!!!! All Bransons were able to cool off and even for a short period of time were not sweaty and appeared our normal skin color 😊 Once the tour was over we were free to explore the rest of the castle at our own pace. So our once rush rush rush not turned into leisure and fun. The smiles were back as we posed and took pics and GB was back to his goofy funny self.

We decided after the castle to go back to the house for relaxing down time as 2 clearly let us know she needed her tanning time 🙄 We are now pros with the taxi getting and made it back to our house in no time. Swim suits were quickly donned and it was hot tub time (minus the hotness of the water of course) 2 got her tanning time and we all got a chance to just hang out no stress and do whatever we wanted.

We all cleaned up after a couple hours of chilling and headed out to dinner. GB had found this place called Ojalá. It was a small tapas place with an ice cream store just outside (3 spotted that the minute we found the restaurant 😋) We arrived around 7:30 so we had to wait to order food as the kitchen did not open till 8. We ordered drinks and played a dice game called CLR. It’s a small easily portable game that involves chips and rolling 3 dice. The sides of the dice are indicated with C (center), L (left), R (right) or • (safe). You are given 3 chips and when you roll the three dice you do what the dice tells you to do: pass to the right, pass to the left, pass to the center, or hold your chip. The one with the chips at the end wins. Needless to say this game has been a lifesaver as it has fit perfectly in my bag being so small and it’s an easy quick game to play to kill time. Before we knew it, it was 8:00 and they were ready to take our order. We basically ordered everything on the menu and everything was amazing!!! The plates just kept coming and it was great because everybody tasted a little bit of everything. 1 and I of course had our fill of fish but everyone at least took a taste of what was given. There was a lentil burger that I was bummed we didn’t try but they didn’t have it as a tapas and there was no way I was eating that burger by myself 🥴

We then of course, headed over to their ice cream and 3 of course got her chocolate ice cream along with 2 and I. I honestly don’t know how I had room for it after all that food but I wasn’t going to pass with how yummy it looked. Plus they had mini waffle cones and I am an absolute sucker for waffle cones…can’t turn them down…I think it’s an addiction that may need intervening 😏

Thank goodness we have our walk home to help aid the digestion with all the food we ate. Again everyone is in a great mood upon getting home. We have some brief wind down time before bed and GB teaches 1 and I how to play cribbage. Yes…I live in Wisconsin and I don’t know how to play cribbage…sad but true…please forgive me🙏🏻

Time for us to turn in…tomorrow we have a 2.5 hour car ride to Tarifa where we will be taking the ferry to Morroco. Our feet will actually be on African soil…can’t wait!!

[lifeneedsrot]

🌟new intro post :> ! Hey howdy hi yo. I’m Quasi. This is?? A system account for people other than the host. There will be a few of us here. I’m not really sure who.

We’re looking for friends! We are severely deficient on friendships. Current host has a problem with insisting that the only relationships that they need are within the system! And then they sent a giant black ocean to wipe us all out. Strange! Almost as if by denying connections outside of the system, they inadvertently denied connections within the system as well. Funny how things work, huh?!?? Isn’t that right, host?!!?! Anyway, they don’t want to be associated with me, and probably won’t want to be associated with any of the others that are going to crawl out of the ocean all different than they used to be. Host isn’t going to be here, and won’t even be referred to by name if we can help it.

We’re very open and accepting! Again, looking for friends :>. We don’t reject anyone without giving them a chance to talk a bit. Even if you’re riddled with red flags. In fact, I’m looking for a particular kind of fucked up, so red flags are good in my book. You should take that as a red flag. ;>. So, as far as DNI goes, literally anyone can interact! I guess we’ll just block you if you suck. We dont like taking a stance on anything most of the time, and aren’t interested in discourse. Generally assume that we’ll keep an open mind to anything. My moral compass is crooked and rather broken, really. I don’t think there’s any fixing it after the things I’ve been complacent in 🤷. So I won’t bother! In short, freaks and monsters are welcomed with open arms.

Just a disclaimer, we got cancelled on Quotev for abusing an ex. We did all the actions they claimed, but I don’t think we “groomed” them like they claimed. Grooming is intentional and requires planning something out in advance and preparing someone for a specific purpose. We really just acted on our impulses. Also, they LITERALLY asked for it. They told us, pretty directly, that if we didn’t hurt them, they’d hurt themselves. We were very desperate to get them to stop hurting themselves, and we were very desperate to prove we cared about them, and that we wouldn’t abandon them. Everything we did, we did either because we thought they wanted it, or because we were trying to make sure they didn’t leave us. If you asked our ex, they’d say I took the wrong lesson away from that relationship. Our host believes that they (host) took the right lesson away from the relationship. I think we’re both a little off, if I’m honest, but I’m also pretty stubborn and since I don’t know what the “right lesson” is supposed to be, I’m doubling down on my worldview. Which is that the relationship would’ve worked out if we’d been unapologetic, if we hadn’t let ourselves get guilty, if we hadn’t doubted ourselves, and if we didn’t give in to a pit of self-loathing. The final straw, in my opinion, was when we “tried to get better” and didn’t constantly give them what we thought was best for them but started to listen to what they thought was best. We let them break our resolve. And the worst thing we did in that relationship wasn’t the horrible torment we did, but our doubt of our actions and our guilt.

So here’s my warning: I’m unapologetically horrible. I’m going to do what I think is best, and you’re probably not going to change my mind. Im not mean, I’m quite accepting and warm and loving, but I am absolutely pushy and I will break down whatever walls I think are necessary to form the connections I want in the relationships I need. If I take a liking to you, it’s probably going to hurt. I won’t be deceitful, I’ll be pretty direct and honest with the intentions behind my actions, like I am being right now, but I’m definitely going to do exactly what I think is necessary to progress a relationship in the direction I want. I’m looking for a bestest ever best buddy, and if I think you’re the right one to be my bff, let’s just say I could be your angle or yuor debil! ;>!! But seriously, I’m gonna be horrible if it’s necessary. I’ll do pretty much anything short of murder! Even that little barrier could probably be broken if I really believe that murder would get me the love that my parasitic heart needs to live.

Anyway! Ignore my warnings and be my friend 💖. Please please please 😇🥺? I tooootally won’t sink my teeth into your heart and never let go. If youre absolutely horrible, I’ll love you with open arms. I’m horrible too, and unapologetically so. Spill your guts for me and I’ll spill mine for you. Metaphorically of course ;>! I’m looking to build a new found family of freaks. If you’ve got a good mixture of personal elements, I can show you a depth of connection few people have managed to reach. Im a little bonkers, maybe a bit full of myself, but I’m confident that I can recreate that warmth. I’ve done it before. Of course, let’s not get ahead of ourselves! Obviously we’re not going to form an unbreakable bond overnight. It’ll take a long time. But the first step is reaching out and trusting someone with your friendship. So, come talk to me! Give our friendship a chance to blossom. I might be a bit alarming and a bit off-putting, but aren’t you curious? Aren’t you fascinating? Don’t you want to see what happens? Come talk to me! Be my friend :> I’m so lonely, and I’m sure you’re lonely, too. Maybe we’ll connect in unbelievable ways. No way to know until you give it a chance ;>

What a long intro! Where am I going with this? Ah, I know, I should introduce the other alters. I’ll just reblog this with additions when it’s necessary. We use emojis to indicate who’s talking.

🌟Quasi. They/them. Me! Former host before current host. (Technically there was a host between us, but they split in half and half merged into me and the other half merged into the current host.)

🖤Coghlan. He/it. My knife wife. He likes cutting me up in erotic ways. A bit overprotective and very obsessive. He used to not care about any alters that weren’t me, but now he’s taken a role that’s rather charmingly protective of the others. It doesn’t want to let anyone fight in unproductive ways. It pretty much does whatever I want, though.

🔭Stella. She/they. An absolute sweetheart. Very hopeful and positive and quite silly. She’s convinced that we’re not a bad person, though. The parts of me that cared about being a good person fragmented off and melted into them. Super optimistic. Cares about creating art and beautiful stories. She tends to ignore the parts of us that don’t fit her vision of what we are, but doesn’t actively suppress them the way host does.

🧤Northie. They/them. The wounded child. A syskid, so they probably won’t be here often. Be gentle with them or you’ll have me, Starbound, and Coghlan to contend with. They believe that feeling our negative emotions is a necessity to processing them. A kind of “the only way out is through” way of thinking, which contrasts strongly with host’s method of suppressing everything to the point where a weird black ocean slaughters half the system “on accident.”

🐭Phoebe. It/she/they. It only cares about survival, and is our base instinct of “get out now.” Not very interested in relationships or talking to people, so it probably won’t talk to anybody, unless it feels necessary to warn you of some impending peril that you need to run from immediately. Absolutely coward that will choose running and hiding above any kind of risk, or in her words “surviving.” Although in its defense, it keeps us alive. Even if they’re boring about being safe always.

🎆Starbound. “She/her” for simplicity, any pronouns with no personal preference. Pure and unbridled rage. Her favorite word is “bitch” and she’ll refer to everyone, including herself, as a bitch. She’s more of a righteous fury than a hateful fury. Very interested in fighting injustices. She cares about people more than she lets on, but has a temper worse than an active volcano.

🍠Kakxyl. “He/him” for simplicity, any pronouns with no personal preference. The system’s internal father figure. Goes out for milk a lot but always comes back. He usually knows everything that’s going on with the system and tells us revelations about inner mechanisms. But he also is cryptic and quiet. Probably won’t talk to anyone. I only listed him here for the sake of having a complete list of the alters that survived the flood. More of us will be coming out of the ocean, that’s what Kakxyl told us, but for now it’s just us and host.

[the-firebird69]

There's enough said here no he helped me out and I went down to help him and it was good and it's working then it started really working and now it's working a lot and I hear that the alarms are going off and sounding about Max all over the world by foreigners too they're doing they're sending them out too. It's going to work much better than these lazy people who like to attack each other we don't want to be attacked by you I told you we're not in your group and face annihilation you said you don't care and I do. There's some new numbers last night you were 8% including pseudo empire and minority and warlock and miscellaneous and Macklemore now you're at about 6.5% for real but Thor and Freya their numbers are correct in that about three to four percent are up and are going to evacuate and I have numbers in right now and are exiting shortly leaving 4.5%. those numbers are going to change and change back as you more like evacuate and currently only about 0.5% are pseudo empire but as you evacuate they're coming in they're taking strategic areas and they plan on doing it all day we anticipate two more percent more likely evacuate today and 2% of the pseudo empire Will roll in in total and they will outnumber you how's it going out the empire Will roll in and we are too mostly the pseudo empire are taking over your areas but you're barely habitable and they'll start renovating right away yes because their house is a gross. It reminds me of a few things you had a hard time in the desert we had no air and he had a hard time and Cranston you always looks up and says I'm doing fine now he's joking with me says it's not bad the world is our oyster and we can choose if I do laundry or get groceries for pay a bill or any combination of the three so I'm actually laughing cuz he actually asked me all the time anyways what do you think well you should pay the bill and he looks at it and he shows me he's looking all the time he doesn't talk to any of you like that on purpose. You still has a question I think as they roll in probably why it's not to do your laundry there and he agrees. Trump is blowing up his own buildings to prevent anyone from using them and my husband says I don't want your stupid building and he says what about for other people to live in my husband says if it's structurally sound so it's laughing say okay then all right then but in a complex you can't take a few down that easily they said it's pretty shoddy but it takes time to build all that stuff but it takes longer to rebuild it if you destroy only a few of them. We're moving out now. I'm going to tell you this place is going to turn into a nightmare today I don't think it's that great of an idea this is a have to it's going to be a nightmare again the whole time once they take over and I get that push here very much push here it's like three levels of pushiness and that's going to be here in this one that's leaving it's not as pushy they're great these people are pretty pushy.

-bja is beginning his maneuver and he's starting to push these drums out that's what I was walking around in the mall fisherman's village yesterday and he laid off a bunch of people from the local government. Delete off about 20% of the local government that's a lot. 10% of them we're not working I am not there fired anyways. The second 10% spent most of their time chastising the first 10% as I said do not leave your posts and you consider actually fired and they're doing that leaving their post. Right now bja is gearing up the fire another 20% and who's going to try for it and that's why the county and the cities and that's a lot and they're taking it over and it's actually working. It is going on right now and it is a huge deal they are moving out and taking over that would be about 50% of the Charlotte county government positions and the cities the two cities and it should make a difference this guy Trump doesn't really do much and bja and his are more affected yet they have a tendency to do things that are more constructive at times they're not really self-starters but we can help out with that and the pseudo empire is going to try but really they're hoping for them to knock each other out and it probably will happen but bja likes to be busy because it looks like you're doing something instead of sticking your head in everyone's butt. I just let this guy was doing and what he was saying through my husband. And it will go on all day today couple things in addition to

-the sheriff the train to fight over there another fighting over it then finally and fiercely and if I need the clones too. There's a huge number of them fighting to take this over and they want to kidnap my son my husband that is sorry and he's saying it's actually pretty clear and I do understand what you're saying the other way around you would know it okay so we're proceeding we are proceeding and here we go they are getting in there and it's bja it's like 200 sheriff and BJ has about 35 Trump has about 65 and other groups have the rest and a minority more like have 45 and the remaining group split I think that gives you 55 left with the miscellaneous at about 15 or 20 and then the rest are us in the max it's kind of tough and it's going to change quick so we have to be there

He says and it is gigantic it's huge I'm going to publish

Hera

That was done very well and it's true we also have several more announcements she's going to make and it's regarding this area

Olympus

Zues