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kiddoryder · 5 months ago

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Hazbin Pool Days

A commission for @dustinlaughlin enjoy!

Hardy Wiley belongs to @dustinlaughlin

Blitz and Sophie McKnight belongs to @loli-momo1908

It was a blazing hot summer day in Hell. Everyone outside tried their best to continue on with their daily lives, but they were suffering from the sun’s suffocating heat. Flowers were wilting, frozen foods were melting, and sinners were drenched in sweat. Some literally went on fire from the heat.

The gang in the Hazbin Hotel weren’t doing any better either. The fans were not operational and the air conditioner is still in the works.

Angel - *groans* “My god it’s hot as fuck in here! The heat even dried up all of Fat Nuggets mud puddles.”

Husk - “Tell me about it. And having all this fucking fur isn’t helping either.”

Blitz came down the stairs, wearing nothing but shorts and a wifebeater shirt. Sophie came down in a little tanktop and shorts as well looking hot but was drinking water.

Blitz: *moans* “I'm frying like a chicken here. Hasn't Hardy fixed the air conditioner and fans yet?”

Husk - “He said that he’s trying since the shitty things haven’t fucking work in years.”

Angel - “To be honest…Normally I would flirt on how you look right now Blitz but I’m too hot to even flirt.”

Vaggie's voice - *complaining* “You think you have problems? Just look at me!”

Everyone turns to see Vaggie, only to find her usual grayish-lavender skin being darker than normal.

Vaggie - *complaining* “I woke up looking like this!”

Angel - *shrugs* “What’s the difference? You always look like a wrinkle old grape.”

An annoyed Vaggie throws a shoe at Angel's face.

Vaggie - “This is serious Angel. We got to find something else that can cool us down.”

Hardy, Lucifer, and Charlie csmr in with smiles on their faces.

Lucifer - “We've already made the solution!”

Hardy - “Come outside in the back, everybody. You're gonna love what we've been working on.”

Everyone gets up and follow the three to the back of the hotel. Outside, they couldn't believe what they are seeing. It was a fully-made swimming pool! Complete with a diving boards, water slides, and a jacuzzi on the side. Everyone's eyes sparkled with wonder and astonishment like they're seeing Heaven for the first time.

Lucifer - *proudly* “Yep! Instead of depending on the ACs all the time and wasting money, we have our own pool!”

Charlie - *happy* “Now we have other ways to relax and actually bond with each other too!”

Hardy - “Plus working on the ACs is going to take a while. So in the mean time we can enjoy the pools instead!”

With a smile growing on his face, Angel tears his clothes off to reveal himself wearing a swimsuit bikini beneath them.

Angel - *shouts in excitement* “POOL PARTY, Y'ALL!!!!!”

Blitz - *bewildered* “Was he wearing a swimsuit beneath his clothes the whole time?”

Husk - “Most likely but who the fuck cares I’m getting in that jacuzzi.”

Niffty - “Make sure it’s clean!”

Angel leap into the pool while Husk relaxes in the jacuzzi. In a splashing transition, everyone was at the pool in swimsuits. Charlie and Vaggie were on lounging chairs with shades on. Sophie was on an inflatable pool tube, playing with her big brother. Lucifer was close by with a grill and cooking burgers and hot dogs for everyone.

Hardy - *running in* “CANNONBALL!!!!! YAAAA-HOOOOO!!!!!”

Hardy jumps in and made a huge splash in the pool. The water reached Charlie and Vaggie, causing them both to get wet.

Vaggie - *annoyed* “Hey careful!”

Hardy - *embarrassed* “Sorry about that!”

Then Angel noticed Fat Nuggets was about to get in the pool. But Angel gently grabbed him before he got in.

Angel - “Wait sweetie you need your floaties.”

Angel places tiny floaties on each of Fat Nugget's front legs, which lets him float in the water.

As everyone was having fun, Sonya, Liz, Azrael, Zella, and Cherri Bomb came over when they heard about the swimming pool. They were fully dressed in swimsuits.

Sonya - *smiles* “Thanks for inviting us. Our AC was acting up for some reason.”

Liz - “Yeah we were hot to the point we would have been cooked. Luckily it will be fixed this week.”

Charlie - *playfully pinches Sonya's cheek* “Of course, my widdle baby cuz. *kisses her on the cheek* Come on in, the water is great!”

Sonya - *giggled* “Thanks cousin Charlie *got in the pool* man this is really great!”

Angel - *mischiefly* “Hey Sonya! *Sonya turns to Angel* Think fast!”

Angel swings his arms and causes water to splash at her face. She was now soaking and wet much to her dismay. Angel was laughing at her and even Liz was laughing at her much to her sister’s annoyance. But she got something up her sleeve.

Sonya - *smiles* “Oh, you'll pay for that one!”

Sonya pulls out a water gun and starts spraying at Angel Dust.

Angel - *getting wet* “Hey! That's cheating!”

Sonya - *smug* “You didn’t say anything about water guns.”

Sonya continues to spray Angel Dust as he rans away.

Cherri - “Hey Angie, catch!”

Cherri Bomb tosses Angel a spare water gun. Angel turned to Sonya and had a teasingly look on his face.

Angel - *teasingly* “Payback time squirt!”

Sonya - *sweatdrop* “Uh-oh.”

Sonya ran as Angel and Cherri chased after her with water guns of their own. As this happens, Azrael goes over to be with his brother at the grill.

Azrael - “Hey bro, what's cookin?”

Lucifer - “Oh just some burgers and hot dogs. Gotta make it special for my little girl and her friends.”

Azarel - “Do you need help?”

Lucifer - “Nah. I’m the master grill here.”

Azarel - “You mean grill master?”

Lucifer - “Nope, I prefer being called the master grill.”

Lucifer uses his own fire to cook up the meat instead of the grill.

Azrael - “Wait, if you're using your powers to cook the food, why do they need the grill?”

Lucifer - *shrugs with a smile* “Just for show.”

Azrael gives Lucifer an unamused look and facepalms himself.

Lucifer - “Come on Ray-Ray you know how I like to put up a show.”

Azarel - *rolls his eyes* “Yeah you even did a muppet show on your wedding day. Even my wedding.”

Lucifer - “And what's wrong with that? Everyone loves muppets.”

Azrael - “Not Mephistopheles.”

Lucifer - *waves dismissively* “Bah, what does he know? That guy doesn't even have good taste in entertainment. We're talking about the guy who gave Sheryl Leach the idea of creating a purple dinosaur monstrosity for a children's show.”

Azarel - “I rather watch one of Mammon clown shit then that stupid purple dinosaur.”

Lucifer - *shudders* “Tell me about it. I've already got enough mental scars from that thing. I swear, if we weren't god's children, then that fucking freak would've been irrefutable proof that there was no God in this universe and it was a cold, dark place where there was no good in this world except the sweet embrace of death.”

Azrael - *nods* “Amen to that, bro.”

Lucifer - *calling out* “Okay everybody! Soup on!”

Sophie - *confused* “We are having soup?”

Blitz - *laughs* “No, sis. It means the burgers and hot dogs are ready.”

Sonya - “Oh awesome I’m starving!”

Everyone got out of the pool and dried themselves off. Then they gathered around the table to eat up their food.

Charlie - “Gotta say, having that pool is actually better than the ACs.”

Angel - “You're telling me. The water is sooooo refreshing. *flips the bird at the sun* Take that, heat wave! Ha!”

Cherri - “Yeah! We don’t need this bitchy heat wave.”

Charlie - “Plus having this pool is a good activity for all of us.”

Lucifer - “Alright, settle down everybody because it's time to dig in.”

Lucifer and Azrael hand out hamburgers and hot dogs to everyone. Lucifer even handed a plate of burgers to Fat Nuggets.

Angel - “Hold on, I gotta cut up a burger for Nuggies.”

Angel Dust cuts up tiny pieces of burger meat for Fat Nuggets.

Angel - *gushes* “There you go, baby.”

Fat Nuggets happily began to eat as Angel began to pet him.

Blitz - “You know you didn’t have to cut it up for him? Pigs do have strong teeth and stomachs after all.”

Angel - “Yes, but my Nuggies is just a baby, it will take some years until his teeth are strong enough to bite down a whole burger.”

Fat Nuggets oinks as he continued eating.

Sophie - *giggled* “I can see he likes the food.”

Lucifer - *smug* “Well it is cooked by the best such as moi.”

Azrael -“ Ha! I bet I can cook way more delicious meat than you, Luci.”

Lucifer - *devious smiles* “Is that a challenge?”

The two smile at each other competitively.

Charlie - *nervously* “Oh boy here we go again.”

Hardy - “What is it?”

Zella - “It would seem that both our men are going to compete against each other again.”

Hardy - “Does this always happen?”

Liz - “You have no idea. They always do this.”

As the two brothers stare one another, Azrael snaps his fingers and he instantly shifts into a summer cooking outfit and summoned a grill of his own. Both of them arm themselves with barbacue utensils, and then, they two began to cook like there's no tomorrow.

As they group watch Lucifer and Azrael cook, their tables started to get loaded with several different barbecue dishes, such as ribs, steaks, shish kebabs, corn on the cobs, pork chops, briskets, sausages, and several different foreign barbecue dishes from around the world. Everyone just watched with different expressions from confusion to unamusement.

Hardy - *confused* “Uhh should we stop them?”

Charlie - *shakes her head* “No, it gets crazy between them.”

Sonya - “Don’t worry about it dude. They will tire themselves out.”

Angel - “At least we got free food.”

Hardy - “I don't think we'll be able to eat all of this. And this is coming from the guy with a really big appetite. Many of them will most likely get cold or go bad.”

Charlie - “I'll have any leftovers sent to Cannibal Town. I'm sure this will fill their stomachs for some time.”

Hardy - “Yeah, that might work.”

Sonya - “I don’t mind taking some home with me either.”

Then Azarel and Lucifer got so tired they both fainted on the floor.

Lucifer - *panting* “I…won!”

Azarel - *panting* “In your…dreams duck lover!”

Sonya - “See, tire themselves out like always.”

Angel - *impatient* “Can we eat now? I’m fucking starving.”

With that said, everyone starts chowing down whatever food they can eat.

Vaggie - *eating* “Gotta say they are both amazing chefs.”

Charlie - *proudly* “That's our dads. They aim to please their family and loved ones.”

Niffty - “I can’t wait to wash all the dishes!” *giggled*

As eveyone ate, they were being watched by someone as they scowl at the group having a fun time.

??? - “Can’t believe those c*** didn’t even invite me!! Look at the food they got! It should have been mine! After all I done for those fuckers. They should be grateful! *evily* Well, I'll show them.”

Everyone has just finished eating their meals. They all rubbed their stomachs for being full. Some even looked like they were about to pass out.

Hardy - “Phew, boy, I'm stuffed as a turkey.”

Liz - *groans* “Yeah…I don’t think I can even eat another bite.” *eats a cookie*

Fat Nuggets was stuffed too as he rolled on his back and looked sleepy. Angel took note of this.

Angel - “I think i'm gonna put Fat Nuggets down for a nap. And probably gonna join him too.”

Angel picks up Fat Nuggets and takes him inside the hotel.

Sonya - *yawns* “Maybe we should all take a nap. I feel like falling into a food coma.”

Charlie - *nods* “Yeah *yawns* Me too. Let's call it a day, everyone. We'll do more swimming tomorrow.”

Blitz - “Sounds good to me. Come on Sophie, I can tell you look tired too.”

Sophie - *yawns* “Okay big brother.”

Lucifer - *to Azarel* “You and Zella are welcome to stay for the night Azarel. I know you both exhausted to go back home.”

Azrael - “I will kindly take that offer, thank you.”

Zella - “Thank you so much. And thank you for making an amazing lunch.”

()()()()()()()()

Everybody went inside the hotel and went to their room. As Vaggie was putting on her pajamas she said:

Vaggie - “This is gotta be one of the best ideas you had, babe.”

Charlie - “Thanks, Vaggie. We thought a swimming pool would be a good addition to the hotel. I learned that swimming can actually make you relax and ease the mind. Plus it could be a good bonding exercise for everybody.”

Vaggie - “Well, it certainly did wonders for me. If I had spent another hour in that heat wave without anything to cool off, I would've gone insane.”

Charlie - “Yeah me too. *flirty* Plus you did look sexy in that swimsuit.”

Vaggie - *chuckles* “Oh stop.”

Charlie - *sexily* “Nooooo.~”

Charlie approaches Vaggie with a seductive smile on her face.

()()()()()()()()()()

The next day everybody woke up and was finishing up breakfast. Then Sophie said:

Sophie - “Can we go to the pool again Charlie?”

Charlie - “Sure! The heatwave isn’t stopping until Friday. So we are okay with cooling off.”

Blitz - “But we can’t swim yet. Remember, we gotta go 30 minutes without swimming because we just ate. If we swim after eating, we will all be cramping.”

Sophie - “That sounds painful.”

Liz - “It is Cupcake. I talk from experience.”

After cleaning the dishes, everybody put on their swimsuits and began to head toward the pool.

Hardy - “Hey you know what? We should get a volleyball net for the pool.”

Angel - “Good idea, I know a good sports shop that-- *gasps in shock*

Hardy - “What's wrong, A.D.? *turns his head to where Angel's looking and makes a shocked expression* What the?!”

Hardy and Angel Dust find the entire pool filled with white goop.

Angel - *shocked* “What the FUCK happend to the pool?!”

Everybody saw that the pool was full of white goop. Even some white goop bubble popped which grossed them out.

Charlie - *horrfied* “What happened to the pool?!”

Angel - “It look everybody gather around, jerked around and made it full of c-“

Blitz - *covered his mouth* “Don’t you dare say that in front of my sister.”

Husk - *shakes his head* “Nah it’s impossible for somebody to do what Angel said in a pool. It would take weeks. This shit though it looks like melted frosting or something.”

While relieved it wasn’t anything sexually gross, Hardy goes to take a closer look. He scoops his fingers in it and takes a whiff.

Hardy - “It's marshmallow. Somebody's filled our pool with melted marshmallows!”

Sophie - “Who would do something so mean? And marshmallows are usually good! Especially when it’s used to make s'mores.”

Vaggie - *angry* “It’s probably somebody’s idea of a sick prank.”

Fat Nuggets lean to sniff the melted marshmallows thanks to the sweet scent. However, he leaned too far and fell in the pool. Much to Angel’s horror.

Angel - *panicked* “FAT NUGGETS!”

Angel raced down and swiftly pulled his pet pig out. While Fat Nuggets was okay and wasn’t too deep in the pool, he was covered in melted marshmallows.

Angel - *concerned* “You gotta be more careful, sweet pea. You almost gave your daddy a heart attack.”

Fat Nuggets had a guilty look on his face. He gave Angel a kiss on the cheek and boop his snout on it as well despite being covered in melted marshmallow. It was his way of apologizing and it worked on his daddy.

Angel - *gushing* “Aww I forgive you. But now you need a bath. Can’t make you all sticky.”

Angel went to his room to give his pet piggy a nice warm bath. Charlie looked really upset at how her pool was ruined for everybody.

Charlie - *upset* “All of our hard work has been ruined! This will take days to clean this and fix it up! Who would do such a horrible thing?!”

Blitz - *picking up an object from the ground* “I think it's a safe bet to say that this could be a clue to our saboteur.”

Niffty - “Ooh what is it? Is it dirty?”

Cherri - *sees what Blitz is holding* “Huh. Looks like somebody left their money here. Oh well, finders keepers.”

Lucifer - *suspicious* “Wait a sec! *snags the wallet from Cherri* This is one of Mammon's wallets! That fat fuck! He must've been the one to mess with our pool!”

Azarel - “What? Why the hell would he mess with our pool?”

Zella - *rolls her eyes* “Because he’s a greedy fool who thinks he is so cool.”

Lucifer - *groans* “I don't care what his deal is, but I am going to march right down to the Greed Ring and give that fucking sack of cow shit a piece of my mind!”

Charlie - *stopping her Dad* “Wait Dad, it can be dangerous. You know how Uncle Mammon can be.”

Lucifer - “Oh I know, and I don't care. That fucker has been a real pain in my ass for far too long. It's time that I show that sad excuse of a clown who's the top dog around here.”

Lucifer pulls his pants up and pushes his top hat in front of his face to show how serious and tough he is.

Hardy - *stops him* “Hold on, Lucifer. I think I have a better idea to get back at Mammon.”

Lucifer - *annoyed* “Oh really? What's your big idea Fireball?”

Hardy - “Instead of getting into a fight with Mammon, let's pull a prank of our own back at him.”

“Did somebody say prank?”

They all turned around and saw Angel now holding a clean Fat Nuggets. Angel had a smug look on his face.

Hardy - “Yeah it was me. I suggest we pull a prank on Mammon.”

Angel - “Ooh now we are cooking! I happen to be an expert on that kind of stuff.”

Cherri - *exciting* “Oh, oh, oh! I want in on this too! I love pulling pranks!”

Liz - *excited* “Ooh me too!!”

Angel - “Okay team, gather around. Let's come up with a plan of action.”

Everyone huddles together in a circle and they formulate a plan to prank Mammon.

()()()()()()()()()()

In the Greed Ring, Mammon was lounging around and laughing full-heartedly after sabotaging the Hazbin Hotel's pool.

Mammon - “That should teach those wankers not to invite me and make those foods without me. *suddenly his phone rang* What up, wanka?”

Lucifer - *fakely happy* “Mammon, old buddy. How ya doin?”

Mammon - *happy* “Oh Luci! How ya been my good friend.”

Lucifer - “Good, absolutely terrific old chum. *silently gags and points his tongue* So Mammon, I was going to ask you if you had any plans for the night?”

Mammon - “Mmm not really. Why?”

Lucifer - “Well, I was hoping that I could invite you over. I have a very special surprise for you.”

Mammon - *excited* “Ooh I love surprises!”

Lucifer - “Then you're gonna love this one, come on down to the hotel and I give it to ya.”

Mammon - “Alright! I’ll be there in an hour. See ya c*** king!”

Lucifer - “See you soon, buddy. *hangs up and makes gag sounds* I can't believe that I actually called him buddy.”

Hardy - “Okay guys, Mammon's coming, so get everything ready for phase 2.”

Angel, Cherri, and Liz saluted and rushed off to set up the prank.

()()()()()()()()()

Blitz - “You know normally I don’t approve, but this is needed.”

Charlie - “Agreed. I mean, Uncle Mammon is a big bully.”

Hardy - *looking out the window* “Pick up the pace guys, here he comes!”

Lucifer - *whispers* “Remember to keep quiet about the prank!”

Charlie - “Okay everyone, places. It's showtime.”

Charlie opens the door and reveals Mammon.

Mammon - *gushing* “Aww Chuckie! How are ya little mate?”

Charlie - “Uhh, it's Charlie, Uncle Mammon.”

Mammon - *not caring* “Ehh Chuckie, Charlie, same shit.”

A sweatdrop appears on Charlie. Mammon was one of the few demons Charlie really disliked because of his selfish greedy attitude. Even most of the Deadly sins can’t stand Mammon.

Charlie - ��A-Anyway, welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. We've been expecting you.”

Mammon - “So this is the hotel you've been working on?”

Charlie - *nods* “Yes sir, the hotel that we work at rehabilitates sinners to find redemption.”

Mammon - *burst out laughing but stops* “Oh you’re serious? Thought you were joking.”

Charlie - “Uh no I wasn’t.”

Mammon - *scoff* “Figures. Since women can’t be funny anyways.”

Charlie - *frowns with an unamused tone* “That's sexist, Uncle Mammon.”

Mammon - *impatient* “Yeah yeah whatever. I want to see my gift!”

Charlie - *sighs* “Of course, right this way, please?”

Charlie takes Mammon to see his surprise.

Charlie - “Dad and I worked for this you. Since you work so hard on the clown pageant.”

It was a large golden throne fitted for Mammon's size, and close to it was a long table of delicious food.

Charlie - “And it is all just for you, Uncle Mammon.”

Mammon - *squeaks* “Oh your c*** are the best!”

Mammon rushed in and took his seat. Then, he starts hoarding all the food and scarfs it down. As he eats, everyone watches them with smiles on their faces, stifling their lips to prevent any laughter going out.

Hardy - *curiously whispers to Lucifer* “How is it that he's the lord of greed and not gluttony?”

Lucifer - *whispers* “Believe me I ask myself that everyday. But my best guess is that Bee is nicer than this asshole.”

Mammon gorges every single dish down, leaving piles of dirty and saliva-covered dishes, Then finally, he finished all the food, and left out a large burp.

Mammon - *sigh in relief* “Man that was good.”

Charlie - “Well, now that you've enjoyed your meal, how about giving you a ride back at the Ring of Greed?”

Mammon - *groans* “Yeah I can’t walk when I’m too full like this.”

Angel - “Oh, don't you worry, your greediness. We got you covered. *smiles deviously* Enjoy your trip.”

Mammon looked confused at first, until he looked down and saw Liz lighting a fuse, then running for cover. The golden throne that Mammon was sitting on started to rumble violently. Then, it started to fire Mammon right out of the hotel into the sky. Everybody began to laugh seeing Mammon blasted off.

Liz - *imitates an Italian accent* “So long, Mammon.”

Sonya - *laughs* “That was so awesome!”

Lucifer - “That’ll teach him not to mess with our pool.”

Hardy - “How long do you suppose those laxatives that we put in the food will kick in?”

Angel - “I say around the moment he makes it back to Greed Ring.”

Vaggie - *chuckles* “He’s going to be in the bathroom for a LONG time.”

()()()()()()()()()

Speaking of Mammon, he was rocketing back to the Greed Ring, screaming his lungs off as the firework rocket came crashing down in his home. The crash messed up his entire bedroom. and his golden throne was wrecked.

Mammon - *horrified* “My throne! My money! My everything! It’s all ruined!! *angry* I’m SO getting them back!!”

But then, his stomach started to gurgle, and his lower parts started to feel very uncomfortable.

Mammon - *groaning* ��Oh my stomach…It never acted like this!! Gotta go to the bathroom!!”

Mammon rushed to his bathroom, only to find a sign on the door that says "Out of Order"

Mammon - *shocked* “You gotta be kidding me!! Aww screw it!”

One of his employees come in with loads of boxes.

Employee - “Hey, Mr. Mammon, I have those--*shocks to see what Mammon did* GOOD SATAN, MAMMON, WHAT THE FUCK?!”

()()()()()()()()()()

On the TV's new broadcast, Katie Killjoy has just explained what happened to Mammon, as everyone was laughing at this.

Angel - *laughs* “Oh man, we got him so good!!”

Cherri - *laughs* “Yeah, this whole thing has gone viral on all social media! *laughs*

Lucifer - *laughs* “Hopefully that bastard learned his lesson.”

Charlie - *stop laughing* “Well, now that's been settled, we should probably get that swimming pool fixed before the next heat wave comes in.”

Hardy - “Yeah we don’t need to be cooked to a crisp.”

Lucifer - *brings out shovels* “I got the shovels for the marshmallows.”

Hardy and the group go to clean and fix up the swimming pool. It may take a while to get the pool fixed, but it was certainly worth it on a hot summer day.

The End.

#hazbin hotel #fanfic #commissions #commission fanfic #my fanfic

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