#criminal minds headcannon
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chvoswxtch · 6 months ago
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hi my love, my sweetness!! congrats again on 4K you deserve it so much and I love youuu!!
I know the cafe is technically closed but I thought maybe if I flirt a bit with the owner, who’s such an amazing lovely person who writes excellent fics, I thought I might be able to order a drink or two (only if there’s time and of course fine if not<3)
so could I order a macchiato over ice for Frank or Hotch. how would they be/react if they saw you in their clothes? I think both are so territorial and like daddies and if they saw you just in their sweatshirt or jacket or whatnot in a completely innocent situation they’d lose it. Let’s not even get started on at home or bedroom related
love you thank you for sharing your writing with us <333
SWEET BABY D!!!!
oh i've missed you so. thank you so much my sweet. you can order anything you want <3
sjdkshdsjkd do you know how absolutely feral hotch would go if he came home after a shitty week & saw you wearing one of his dress shirts bc i'm going feral just thinking about it so let me paint you a lil picture
as a reminder, over ice means it's spicy ! (minors dni)
headcannon below the cut
aaron hotchner likes you in his clothes
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let me set the scene for ya. it's been a long week for our bau daddy, dealing with narcissistic psycho killers & keeping all his kids in line (the rest of the bau), & the frustrations are high when he finally steps off the jet. he doesn't even stay back to handle the mountain of paperwork waiting for him, that's how fed up he is
when he finally makes it home, it's well after midnight, & he's so tired he doesn't even wanna take a nice hot shower like he usually does to unwind. he just wants to fall into bed & let the exhaustion take over
but when he passes by the kitchen, he instantly freezes, bc there you are standing by the counter, having a lil midnight snack (eating ice cream straight out of the tub), wearing nothing but one of his dress shirts. and when I say nothing, I mean hotch can tell you are wearing absolutely nothing underneath
his eyes quickly darken with pure lust & his cock is already half hard when he stalks over towards you with determined steps
the spoon is still in your mouth when you notice him, a smile stretching across your lips around it before you lick off the sweet remnants & slip it out of your mouth
"hey, how was the c-"
you don't even get a chance to finish that sentence bc hotch cuts you off by grabbing the back of your neck to capture your mouth in a heated kiss & he does not hold anything back as he pushes you up against the counter
his kiss is aggressive & needy, & the muffled moan that escapes you tastes delicious on his tongue. his fingers make quick work of unbuttoning the few buttons you'd had done, but he doesn't push it off your shoulders. oh no, he wants you to keep it on
his hands roam over your newly exposed skin, greedily grabbing at your breasts to squeeze them roughly, his thumb & index fingers toying with your sensitive nipples knowing it'll get you all riled up for him, & the sounds you make let him know it's working
he grabs your hand & guides it to his belt, & without hesitation you follow his silent command, your nimble fingers unbuckling it while he sheds his suit jacket & tie
in a flash he swiftly spins you around & bends you over the counter, bunching the bottom of his shirt up around your hips, & he spreads your legs further apart with his foot
he wastes no time pushing forward, burying his cock deep without warning, his hand quickly covering your mouth to contain your sharp moan. his other hand has a bruising grip on your hip as he leans forward & hisses in your ear
"be quiet."
the sensation of your warm, tight walls completely enveloping his cock makes his brain go blank. he can't focus on anything else other than how good you feel. he immediately begins snapping his hips, fucking you hard & fast while grunting in your ear
with every powerful thrust, the stress & tension built up in his body from this week starts to fade, & the pleasure rapidly builds. even though he's chasing a much needed release, he's not selfish, so he slips his hand between your thighs & begins to strum swift circles over your clit with two of his fingers
he lets out a quiet, wrecked groan in your ear when he feels your pussy start to contract around him, the muffled moans against his palm only heightening his arousal. as badly as he wants to hear you fall apart, he doesn't wanna wake up jack
when he feels your body seize up as you come, hotch squeezes his eyes shut & lets out a strangled groan, gripping your waist tightly with both hands as his hips start to stutter
"fuck fuck fuck."
he comes hard, spilling deep within your snug walls, emptying himself completely. the way your cunt continues to contract around his cock milks him of every drop he has to offer, & it makes him let out a shuddering breath
placing both of his palms down on the counter to steady himself, he buries his face into your hair, panting heavily. if he wasn't exhausted before, he sure as hell is now, but he's definitely more calm. a breathless laugh leaves your lips before you speak
"well, hello to you too."
letting out a breathless chuckle of his own, hotch smiles & wraps one of his arms around your waist, pressing a soft kiss to your neck
"sorry, hi."
reaching one of your hands back to caress his face with your hand, you hum softly with a grin
"missed me that much, huh?"
leaning into your gentle touch, hotch's smile turns into a full blown grin
"always. but I have to say, I love your choice in pajamas tonight."
glancing down at yourself, it clicks that seeing you in his shirt is what set hotch off, & a devilish smirk spreads across your lips
"i'll keep that in mind. sir."
in conclusion if you hear screaming from across the world it is me
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piqtescue · 1 year ago
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"where did you find this kid?"
"he was left in a basket on the steps of the fbi"
if someone doesnt link me a fic real quick imma just have to write it myself🎉🎉
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only-one-brain-cell · 1 year ago
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Headcanon that Spencers son develops a hyperfixation on dinosaurs after reading about them at the library so anytime he gets a change all he talks about is dinosaurs and of course the BAU is hanging onto his every word. (of course so are his parents Spencer is the one that brought him to the library.)
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truly-yours-matilda · 11 months ago
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𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 (𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐧)
summary: life and the dynamics with the team as jj’s teenage daughter 🫶
warnings: none, i think <3
note: i know that aaron, jack, tara and luke aren’t in the same seasons, but i wanted to include everyone (almost everyone) | any mistakes are mine!
• growing up as jj’s daughter was never boring
• it was filled with excitement and a whole lot of love
• so much that sometimes, you were scared of losing it
• you always worried for your mom when she wasn’t by your side
• but you would both make sure to call and text whenever her schedule wasn’t too hectic which caused you to feel the smallest bit of relief
• being a part of the team in a way, you’ve had a second, very loving family since you were born
• you cherish it with everything you are
• everyone loves you and your presence is always welcome
• whether it’s doing homework at the office after school or just short visits here and there
• your relationship with spencer is special
• spencer is one of your mom’s absolute best friends and naturally, you became close to him too
• you often have deep conversations about life and the human mind
• you both info dump to each other and can discuss the topic for hours
• you show each other books and recommend books to each other, and the team jokes about it (in a loving way)
• you see spencer kind of as a big brother in a way
• the family nights, very much encouraged by rossi and garcia, is a thing you’re included in (unless it involves alcohol some nights)
• ^^ cause then you’re with your brothers
• but when you’re allowed to be with them on family nights, you’re the only one rossi allows to cook with him
• you learn quickly and become quite the chef
• he may or may not have let you taste one of his many wines a few times (just a few) when the others were sent to the living room
• your relationship with emily is the CUTEST
• she loves you and you love her
• she’s the best (self proclaimed) aunt in the world and you often come to her for advice or to just hang out
• you’re with her a lot
• her hugs are AMAZING and so cozy and comforting
• you love how affectionate she is to you
• especially since she’s not like that with a lot of people, just the people she really cares about and loves
• it makes you feel special
• she’s always there to listen to you
• so when you’re having a bad day, your mom tells emily and she comes over with your favorite ice cream and you watch comfort movies
• emily’s hugs are even more comforting at these times
• em’s like a security blanket for you
• as you begin to discover who you are as you grow into a teenager, she’s there like a pillar in a storm
• being a teenager is hard and she, more than anyone, knows just how difficult it is
• she’s there for you with unconditional support and so much love
• penelope garcia <3
• she’s such a personality and you love her so much
• she’s so kind and caring and sweet and funny and comforting
• and on girl’s nights with your mom and emily, she makes you laugh so much
• she has a special way of making you feel good and happy
• even though there’s a significant age gap, you’re like best friends
• garcia sees a lot of jj in you, so she’s always been protective of you
• when you start dating, she secretly does the thing she’s best at and finds out just about everything there is to know about this certain person
• she definitely spoils you with gifts and books and everything you like, even though you protest that she’s going to become poor soon
• you love to bake and you do it all the time, so when you bring whatever you’ve baked to the office, penelope is your go-to taste tester
• the team loves coming back from a case and eat whatever you’ve baked
• you and hotch (plus jack) <3
• aaron is definitely like a father figure to you
• so naturally, jack becomes like a second older brother to you
• you, your biological brothers and jack had formed your own little friend group over the years
• you look up to aaron a lot
• he’s so brave and so determined
• you remember wanting to be like him when you were a little girl
• he’s there if you have games and he’s there if you even just have practice
• the rest of the team is too
• they cheer you on the loudest
• and your mom looks at you with proud eyes
• you, your mom and your brothers have lunch or dinner with aaron and jack sometimes
• as a way to catch up and just hang out
• jj and aaron loves watching their children having fun together, laughing and smiling
• you and morgan !!!
• you’re his baby, angel, sweetheart
• he’s “rerek” to you and that’s what you’ve been calling him since you were a little girl and couldn’t pronounce his name right
• he’s like a very protective, older brother to you
• derek is a bit of a pushover when it came to you
• he would do anything for you, even if it meant going against your mother's rules
• you knew this and would sometimes use it to your advantage, especially if you wanted to sneak out of the house and see your friends
• derek could never say no to your piercing, blue puppy dog eyes
• you and derek's relationship was one of a kind - filled with love, trust, and a bond that could never be broken
• you love his hugs so much
• they’re strong, comforting and genuine
• they’re never loose and you’re often i’m his arms
• luke and you
• you’re more mature than luke and it shows pretty much all the time
• of course, you can be silly and funny, you get that from your mom
• but luke can be like a 12 year old boy sometimes
• you love him anyway
• you have a secret handshake that’s not so secret anymore because you do it like every time you meet
• the handshake has been alive since you were a little girl and it wasn’t going away anytime soon, no matter how old you get
• you and garcia spoil roxy all.the.time
• luke more times than not likes the things you get roxy
• and he’s very grateful for you and garcia
• you and tara have mutual respect and admiration for each other
• you have so much fun when you’re together, no matter how much time you’ve spent apart
• not that much time goes by without you seeing your second family
• tara is a great role model for you
• you admire the way she carries herself and the way she works, while still keeping her humorous and silly side when she’s with the people she loves
• tara is a great listener, and you come to her for guidance and advice
• you love to play pranks on spencer, and tara always joins in on the fun
• tara has definitely taught you self defense, and jj is eternally grateful for that
• (your mom has taught you some moves herself)
• you’re clever, more clever than most people your age, and tara is in awe of how you think and how your mind works
• you’re so grateful to have grown up with such a loving family
• a found family isn’t something every person has and you’re so happy to have them all by your side
• they’re such a great support system
• even though every day was a whirlwind of mixed emotions because of cases, the one thing that remained constant was the unconditional love you all share
• you’re so grateful for your mom for just being herself
• you have an overwhelming amount of love for her, your brothers and the team
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starandcloud · 2 months ago
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Morgan headcannon
I don't know why, but someone mentioned that they had heard about Morgan's actor drinking a pumpkin spice thing (not sure how true this is tbh-) and now I can't get it out of my head that Morgan drinks those everytime they're in season-
Criminal Minds Mainlist
Mainlist
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amateurvamp · 6 months ago
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Best duos are lesbian and their weird little freak bff
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t1red-twilight · 7 months ago
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soft spencer headcannons
summary: god i’m such a sucker for soft spencer
content/warnings: corny:/
notes: several of these are inspired by my parents, who are genuinely the cutest couple i know.
word count: 0.4k
masterlist s. r. masterlist
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- he just really likes watching you get ready. if you wear makeup, he’ll ask you what everything is for (even if he kinda already knows)
- will see something that reminds him of you and buy it for you every. time.
- “it reminded me of that time we -”
- loves having his hair played with
- remembers every obscure fact about you, obviously, and it surprises you every time
- “i can’t believe you remembered that i like this”
- “i remember everything, but i especially take note of everything about you. it comes in handy☺️”
- strokes the back of your hand with his thumb when you hold hands
- is clingy lol
- hand on your thigh, constantly. not necessarily sexual, just likes being close
- hand on the waist. holding hands. hell, even linking pinkies.
- when you sit next to him on a couch, he will pull your legs onto his lap
- surprisingly, he lives for physical contact with you despite his germaphobia. you’re not complaining though
- loves when you talk about your life and tell him all the drama
- “wait she said that? that’s ridiculous. that’s bold coming from someone who cancels all her plans twenty minutes before they’re supposed to start.”
- has a tube of your favorite lip balm (just in case)
- will look at you and smile for no reason. when you ask why he’ll just sigh and say that he likes you a lot
- goodbye kisses ALWAYS. won’t leave unless you give him one.
- listens when you talk about your interests. he likes to see you talk passionately about something, he’ll ask clarifying questions as well.
- sends good morning texts at the same time every day you’re not together
- takes your dishes and washes them for you, even when you protest
- slow dancing.
- appreciates and says thank you for every thing you do for him, even if it’s super minute and you tell him it’s not necessary.
- compliments you in front of the team, in front of friends, family, etc. bro loves talking about you lol
- morgan teases him about being “whipped”
- lays his head in your lap whenever possible
- will pucker his lips and point to them to ask for a lil smooch
- attempts to learn to cook for you-
- one time he set the fire alarm off, and he was panicking when you got home. once you opened the windows and got the smoke out, you kissed his disappointed pout away.
- tells you everything. like literally everything.
- “i had a really good muffin for breakfast this morning.”
- “yeah?”
- “yeah! it was from that new bakery on fourth street. you know, you might like it. maybe we should -“
- in conclusion: he really likes you. like a lot. you’re one of the only constants in his life and he loves that you provide some stability. he loves that you love him too.
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pastanest · 5 months ago
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Spencer Reid x she/her!reader
A/N: me posting twice in the same month?? someone do a welfare check
warning: age gap mentioned (bc I’m a slut) but not extensively or in a weird way bc Spencer’s not a pervert lol
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Moth To A Flame
Closing the bathroom door with your own back, you slide down it until you’re sitting on the floor, bringing your knees to your chest and taking a shaky breath. You shouldn’t call him while crying, you know better than that, but you know your own tells enough to hope you can mask them; a futile effort considering who you intend to call at 3am.
Lifting your phone to your ear, you hear it ring no more than twice before your prayers are answered, and you breathe a sigh of relief.
“Hey, Spencer.” You greet him quietly, smiling from just saying his name.
“Hi, sunshine. How are you?” Spencer’s voice is calm and collected, but it’s clear through the phone he’s delighted to hear from you.
There’s no question raised regarding the time at which you’re calling. But no matter how many times this happens, Spencer always enquires after your wellbeing.
“I’m okay, thank you. Just…you know. How are you?” The question is returned, though neither of you are a fan of small talk.
“Yes,” Spencer responds specifically to the insinuation he knows, because he does. Then, he continues, “-I’m well, too, thank you.”
His words, and what goes left unsaid, makes your smile grow.
“What’re you reading?” You ask, and the quiet chuckle you hear from Spencer is enough to prove you right in your assumption of his reason for being awake at this hour.
“Pride And Prejudice. How did you know I was reading?” He wonders aloud with a fondness in his voice that he reserves only for you.
“When aren’t you reading?” You roll your eyes playfully, and Spencer can practically hear it.
“When I’m sleeping.” He quips, his own smile evident in his voice.
It’s enough to have you laughing softly into the phone, which only serves to make Spencer’s smile grow.
“Read me some?” You request quietly.
Like you ever need to ask.
Spencer clears his throat into the phone.
“After a silence of several minutes, he came towards her in an agitated manner, and thus began, ‘In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.’ Elizabeth's astonishment was beyond expression. She stared, coloured, doubted, and was silent. This he considered sufficient encouragement, and the avowal of all that he felt and had long felt for her immediately followed. He spoke well, but there were feelings besides those of the heart to be detailed, and he was not more eloquent on the subject of tenderness…” Spencer reads aloud, and the smile on your face is almost as soft as his voice sounds through the phone.
By the end of the chapter, your eyes have drifted closed and your head is tipped back against the bathroom door behind you. Hearing how calm your breathing has become, Spencer pauses, and you hear him close the book.
“See you in the morning?” He always asks because on the rare chance you’ll say no, at least he has time to mentally prepare for your absence. Tonight is not the night for that.
“Yeah, see you tomorrow…Thank you.” You reply, already feeling close to sleep.
This stumps Spencer momentarily, and he falters before he replies, “For what?”
And there’s only one thing you can say to that.
“Being you.”
Spencer chuckles sheepishly, “I don’t know how to be anyone else.”
Of course he doesn’t. Perhaps, if he was anyone else, you’d stand a chance.
“Goodnight, Spencer.” You tell him gently.
“Goodnight, sunshine.” There’s a second of warm silence as you savor the sound of each other’s quiet breathing, and then you both hang up the call.
Standing up from where you’d been sitting on the bathroom floor, you take another deep breath before reaching for the door handle. Walking through a house that isn’t yours, into a living room where the sound of snoring from the couch makes you want to tear your hair out, past a kitchen where a cheap measly pile of four red roses lie limp on the counter with a post-it note in place of any kind of meaningful card, up the staircase where framed photographs filled with eyes that aren’t on your side stare down at you judgmentally, until you’re safely confined in the bedroom you feel doomed to. Crawling into your side of the bed, you adjust the pillows that occupy the other side, filling the space in a shape long enough to resemble the shape of someone under your bedcovers. And with Spencer’s voice still in your ears wishing you a good night, you close your eyes and drift off to sleep.
Meanwhile, Spencer adjusts his alarm clock to wake him an hour earlier than necessary, and awakens from a peaceful slumber with a determined mission in mind. Once his normal morning routine is complete, instead of driving to the office, he drives to his preferred florist, who greets him with a knowing smile when Spencer walks in.
“Another dozen?” The florist guesses.
“Please.” Spencer nods, smiling politely.
Retrieving his wallet from his back pocket, Spencer pays for the flowers and graciously thanks the florist, taking the flowers and then leaving the establishment to return to his car. He drives back home, placing the dozen flowers in a glass vase that he keeps pristine for this very purpose, with the perfect level of water for optimal growth for this specific species of flower. Very carefully, Spencer inspects them until he determines which has the prettiest bloom today, and that is the one he elects to remove from the vase, carefully securing its stem in seran wrap and placing it in the pocket of his suit jacket, then continuing on his normal journey into work.
Purposely, Spencer arrives earlier than the rest of the team, so that he can execute his plan without interruptions. From the staff kitchen, he chooses the most elegant looking glass he can find and again pours the perfect level of water - this time for just one flower, specifically - unwrapping the single bloom in his suit jacket and setting in the glass. He then walks to your desk and positions it in an aesthetically pleasing location, but already knows it is not enough. The picture is not complete. It must be perfect for you. Briefly visiting his own desk, Spencer opens the drawer to take a piece of his own parchment paper, from which he cuts a small section that he then folds in half. On what appears to be the front of the folded piece, he maps out a constellation in a dot-to-dot sketch, then inside the fold of paper, he writes the story behind it. After several attempts, Spencer finds the perfect angle at which to place the folded piece of paper next to the flower on the desk, and only then does he return to his usual morning routine of making himself a coffee in the staff kitchen. Counting down the minutes.
By the time you get to the office, you’ve pushed the thoughts of your home from your mind and have a bright smile on your face, looking forward to a day spent working with your friends and not thinking about-
“(Y/N)! I just saw! He got you roses! That’s SO cute! You have, like, the best boyfriend!” Penelope squeals as she runs up to you the very second you walk through the glass doors of the bullpen.
Your heart sinks and your eyebrows furrow.
“You saw?”
Penelope nods excitedly, gesturing to her phone, where she shows you the post your boyfriend had made on social media: a picture he had taken of the four red roses he’d bought you that he filtered to high heaven to make them look more grand than they were, with a caption that said ‘happy four and many more, babe x’. If it weren’t for the sake of keeping your business private - something he clearly cares for about as much as he does you - you’d scoff.
“Oh, yeah. Must’ve missed that he posted that.” You plaster a smile on your face that doesn’t reach your eyes, walking side by side with Penelope towards your desk.
“It was your four year anniversary, right? Did you do anything fancy?” She’s giddy on your behalf.
“No, just had a quiet night in.” You provide an excuse, the most generous blanket statement you could have given to the shambles that were your boyfriend’s anniversary plans.
Your dejectedness, however, is abruptly cut short when your gaze lands on your desk. A single bloom of your favorite flower, with a neatly folded handwritten note of a constellation placed next to it. In a microsecond, you’re turning to where Spencer sits at his desk, hiding his smirk behind his cup of coffee.
“You didn’t!” You feign chastisement, but your giddiness is obvious.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Spencer shrugs, his smile as obvious as yours is.
You’re practically bouncing on the spot when you bring the little glass and the delicate flower within to your face to breathe in the sweet scent.
“These aren’t even in season anymore, Spencer, how did you-“
The question is cut short by a magician who never reveals his secrets.
“I played no part in this, but perhaps someone happens to know somebody else who is equipped to grow them on request.” There’s a teasing lilt to his otherwise matter-of-fact tone, and you are shaking your head in absolute disbelief.
Setting the glass back down on your desk, you pick up the constellation, admiring it carefully before folding it and placing it in your desk drawer, in amongst another 30-something hand drawn constellations. The smile is still lingering on your face when you sit down at your desk, and from where Spencer sits at his, his chest feels warm. So much joy from you at the cost of only an hour’s less sleep and a few more dollars than the asking price of your favorite flowers. Perhaps, tonight you won’t call him trying to hide that you’d been crying again, he hopes. Whether that comes to fruition or not, he has another eleven blooms waiting in his apartment to gift you at random intervals to surprise you and keep your tears at bay for as long as he can, without you ever telling him there was a chance of them falling. He knows.
For the rest of the day, Spencer catches you glancing at the flower on your desk while you work through various reports and paperwork, an almost shy smile lighting up your face every time you see it there.
It’s only when the team begins packing up for the day that Spencer thinks to look into what Penelope had referenced that morning- a post of some kind? Easily enough, Spencer finds your boyfriend’s social media on his computer, and what he discovers makes him borderline violent. Four years together, encompassed by four measly roses and what you called a ‘quiet night in’ that was so beyond underwhelming you ended your evening by calling Spencer from your bathroom. A celebration of that scale warranted only four red roses, while the mere hint you’d been crying was enough for Spencer to visit the florist he pays specifically to keep growing your favorite flowers for you, to buy another dozen that he intends to deliver to you one by one at irregular intervals. Still, it isn’t Spencer’s job to compensate for what is clearly absent from your relationship; at least, not consciously.
“Babe!” A voice calls out that has Spencer using every ounce of strength he possesses to withhold from rolling his eyes. Shutting down his computer, he stands from his desk just in time to see your expression fall where you pack away your things at your own desk.
Turning to face your boyfriend, you give him a tight-lipped smile.
“Hey, what’re you doing here?” You ask shortly.
Excellent question, Spencer thinks.
“Just came to surprise you and drive you home!” Your boyfriend exclaims like it’s some kind of achievement, opening his arms in a big gesture as he approaches your desk.
How considerate, ambushing you at your workplace under the guise of it being a nice surprise, Spencer scoffs internally, deliberately slowing the pace at which he readies his satchel to leave the office.
“Oh. Thanks.” You don’t know what else to say. “I’ll be ready in a second.” You add, feeling like you’re defaulting to basic lines of dialogue to avoid awkward silences.
“Great!” Your boyfriend exclaims, looking around the bullpen like he’s never seen the place before - he has, twice, and Spencer wishes his eidetic memory would allow him to erase the memory of your discomfort during both instances - until his eyes land on a face he recognises, and he grins.
“Spencer! My man!” Your boyfriend yells, and your eyes widen as you watch him walk right over to Spencer and pull him into a bro-hug that immediately has Spencer rigidly uncomfortable.
“I’ve told you-“ You implore, shooting Spencer an apologetic and pleading look before your boyfriend starts talking over you.
“Oh yeah! Sorry, man, forgot you’re weird about touching people.” He laughs, throwing his hands up in mock surrender.
You scowl, parting your lips to bite his head off, but Spencer steps in to prevent you from saying something that’ll only cause more arguments for you when you go home.
“I have an acute awareness and disliking towards unfamiliar germs and contact.” Spencer corrects your boyfriend firmly, aware that only you and him realize what he means by a germ in this context.
“Yeah, man, no worries.” Your boyfriend laughs, like he’s the funniest man in the world to himself. “Ready to go, babe?” He asks you.
“Mhmm.” Another tight-lipped smile, and that’s apparently convincing enough for your boyfriend, who wraps an arm around your waist in a careless action rather than something that should be treasured, and would be treasured by the man you look over your shoulder to give one last apologetic expression to.
That is, until Emily steps out of her office and calls over to you, “Don’t forget about Rossi’s party!”
And you literally wince.
“A party?! Oh man! Can’t wait! Thanks, Emmers!” Your boyfriend answers for you, regarding a party you had deliberately neglected to mention to him, and then he’s all but dragging you out of the office.
Once out of earshot, Spencer actually does scoff.
“Emmers?” Emily asks him with a frown from where she stands on the raised walkway, leaning on the railing.
“A shocking breach of social etiquette to assume a nickname for someone he barely knows.” Spencer clarifies, to which Emily nods.
“You still not coming to Rossi’s tonight?” She elects to ask him, a smile curling at the corner of her mouth.
Spencer sighs heavily. He looks down at his desk, then lifts his head to look over at the elevator doors closing, snatching the view of you away. He knows what will happen tonight. He knows.
The mirror stares back at him. If someone told Spencer a year ago that he’d be attending a work related get together he’d initially rejected the invitation of but went back on himself solely in the hopes that his suit of choice would impress a coworker just over half his age who has a boyfriend, Spencer would have walked right out of prison and requested a psych eval. Still, the thought at the forefront of his mind is that 6 months and 8 days ago he had worn an all-black suit on a case that you had complimented. It is a foolish dream to think you would compliment him for it again, but for you, Doctor Spencer Reid is a proud fool.
Much to your own embarrassment, you and your boyfriend knock at Rossi’s door an hour late, and based on your expression it is not difficult for Spencer to deduce it’s not your fault. Or, it wouldn’t have been difficult if his brain hadn’t short-circuited at the sight of you wearing a thin strapped, floor length purple silk dress that hugged your every curve to the extent that when Spencer rose from his seat in a gentlemanly gesture at your entrance, his knees very nearly buckled beneath him to a position of worship. Your boyfriend’s arm is careless around your waist again, and he drops it not to pull your chair out for you at the table, but to bro-hug David Rossi, who looks at him like he spat in his bowl of pasta. In your disgruntled state, it takes you a second to acknowledge that Spencer is standing, and in between greeting the rest of the team, your eyes continually flit back to him, his heart skipping a beat each and every time in a way that only further convinces him he is in the midst of a medical emergency. Finally, your gaze lingers on him, and he doesn’t waste the opportunity.
“Can I get you a drink? Rossi’s minibar has some of your favorites.” Spencer gestures with the hand not holding his own drink, and without so much as looking to your plus one, you nod and walk around the table.
His large hand ghosts the small of your back, fingers flexing, but he doesn’t allow himself to make contact until he counts the microseconds to cross the distance that takes you both away from every other pair of eyes in this house. The heat of Spencer’s fingertips meet the purple silk of your dress, barely there, but oh, do you feel it.
Once safely standing at the minibar, Spencer only needs to watch your face to see which bottle your eyes light up at, and as soon as he notices, he pours you a glass without you having to ask. In a gesture that feels like a secret, the two of you clink your glasses together and lock eyes to take a simultaneous sip.
“Nice suit.” You nod at Spencer, a shy smile forming behind your glass.
“Thank you.” He tries not to choke on his drink, then nods back at you. “Pretty dress.”
You have to bite your lip to prevent your smile from growing any bigger.
“Thank you. The color reminded me of your scarf.” You remark quietly, and if you weren’t a profiler, you probably wouldn’t notice the almost imperceptible widening of Spencer’s eyes at your words.
“It is a similar shade.” He agrees, his heart in his throat.
Comfortable silence settles between you. Eyes locked, nursing your drinks, your free hands hanging idly at your sides. Standing just a little too close. Fingers almost touching.
“I’m sorry about earlier.” You say eventually.
Spencer shakes his head dismissively. “I appreciate it, but his oversights aren’t your responsibility.” Or your burden, he so badly wants to add.
You sigh. “If he overstepped the boundaries of a guy who was less of a man than you, he could’ve got his face caved in.”
And what a shame that would have been, Spencer muses in his own mind.
“I didn’t escalate the situation, but not because I’m a man- because it wasn’t a worthy cause.” He amends.
“So if there was a worthy cause, you’d have clocked him?” You giggle at the idea.
“Possibly.” Definitely, Spencer smirks.
“What constitutes a worthy cause in the mind of Doctor Spencer Reid?” You tease, tilting your head to look up at him with a curious twinkle in your eyes.
“If he made you cry.” Spencer chooses his words very carefully, and inspects every micro expression on your face in response.
Because your boyfriend has made you cry, you know that, and you know Spencer knows too, despite the fact you haven’t ever stated as such. He knows. All you’d have to do is say the word, and Spencer would walk right back into the dining room, grab your boyfriend by his collar in front of the entire team, drag him outside and beat him to a pulp in the street.
If Spencer wasn’t a profiler, he probably wouldn’t notice the almost imperceptible widening of your eyes at his words.
“Babe! There you are! Rossi’s served us up a couple plates of something with a name I can’t pronounce- Spencer! Hey, man!” Your boyfriend’s agitating, grating voice cuts into the peaceful bubble you and Spencer had been existing in.
Sharing an equally irritated glance, you both turn to face him.
“Linguine alla Puttanesca.” Spencer drawls.
“Yeah, something like that, for sure!” Your boyfriend laughs, loudly, and without you saying a word, his arm is thrown around your waist again, stealing you from Spencer - who trails behind with a scowl fixed on your boyfriend’s arm - and returning to the dining room.
At the table, you sit opposite Spencer, with your boyfriend sitting on your left. You’re grateful for the casual conversation in the room taking his attention away from you for the most part, allowing you the peace of eating without him saying something that makes you want to vomit.
“Been thinking of getting some sleeping pills myself, not been sleeping too good on the couch!”
Nevermind.
Your eyes close in a pained blink, and you lift your napkin with an unnecessarily firm grip to wipe at your mouth.
“Oh. You’ve not got…comfy cushions?” Penelope tries to save the conversation, but the awkward silence has already descended upon the table at your boyfriend’s blatant overshading at your expense.
“Nope, barely been sleeping a wink! I miss my own bed, I’ll tell you that!” Your boyfriend laughs.
Setting your napkin down, you keep your gaze fixed on your half empty plate. You can feel eyes on you. Everywhere.
“A dinner party with your partner’s friends is not the social setting for discussing your relationship.” Spencer quips, releasing enough tension in your chest to allow you a breath.
“Don’t worry, bro, she doesn’t mind!” Your boyfriend nudges you with his arm, and you are rigid.
“Nobody at this table requires a profiling skillset to determine that (Y/N) does mind.” Spencer’s protective nature is bristling.
“Oh yeah, bet you profilers can just look and tell exactly what her problem is, huh?!” Your boyfriend laughs. “Go on, guess!” He demands of the table, like he’s prepping a joke with the greatest punchline in human history.
The table is silent. You close your eyes in a pained blink, begging any god that may exist, please, please-
“She won’t sleep with me!” Your boyfriend roars with laughter, and time slows to an agonizing halt.
The only accompanying sounds are cutlery clattering against plates, then two chairs scraping against the floor.
“That’s enough. Get out.” Rossi points at the door.
“With pleasure.” Spencer’s tone is cool as ice. In a fraction of a second, he rounds the table, grabs your boyfriend by his collar and drags him out of Rossi’s dining room, to the front door.
While the rest of the team crowd around you to check you’re okay, you’re shaking your hand and scrambling to stand, running outside. Spencer’s fists grip your boyfriend’s collar, pinning him to the side of his car.
“-and if I ever find you within a five mile radius of her, I’ll ruin your life without breaking a single law.” He seethes.
“She’s barely even my girlfriend, man, she doesn’t even put out! You can have her!” Your ex boyfriend holds his hands up in surrender while signing his own death warrant.
Spencer’s right hook sends him hurtling against the sidewalk, and Spencer is on him in the blink of an eye. Trapping him under his legs, Spencer delivers punch after punch, hearing bones crack with the force but only seeing red, until Rossi and Luke physically pull him off, and even then he tries to fight past them to carry on.
“Kid, kid, take a breath- you got him!” Rossi gently pats Spencer’s back, and with wide eyes like a deer in headlights, you appear in front of him.
“Spencer.” You breathe his name with an unnamed emotion, reaching up to cup his face in your hands, and his glazed over eyes that hadn’t been able to look anywhere but the bloody mess on sidewalk, find you in an instant.
Emily is already calling in some favors with the local police department to get this resolved with minimal assault charges, if possible.
“C’mon, inside.” You tell Spencer gently, taking one of his trembling, bloody hands in yours and guiding him back into Rossi’s house.
Taking him past the dining room, you find the kitchen and lead Spencer to lean against the empty counter beside the sink. Very carefully, you hold both of his hands under the cold water to wash them free of blood. It doesn’t take you long to realize the blood doesn’t just come from your ex-boyfriend. He’s running on adrenaline, breathing heavily, half watching you and half watching the doorway, as if expecting someone else to walk in that he has to take out to protect you.
Once his hands are as clean as you can get them, you retrieve some ice packs from Rossi’s freezer and hold them to Spencer’s swollen, bloody knuckles. You can’t look away from them.
“Are you in any pain yet?” You ask in a small voice.
“None.” Spencer answers sharply, gaze fixed on the doorway now because he can keep you in his peripheral vision, mind locked in fight or flight mode with an obvious winner.
“This is all my fault, Spencer, I’m so sorry- if I’d have broken up with him…” Your forehead drops to Spencer’s chest, pressing against the fabric of his black tie.
Those words catch him so off guard that he falters, and then frowns.
“None of this is in any way your fault.” Spencer states bluntly.
“If I’d broken up with him already, he wouldn’t have been here, wouldn’t have said those things in front of y- Spencer!” You cut yourself off when your reminder of what your ex had said has Spencer trying to move past you to go back outside and start right where he left off, having no choice but to grab his arm in an effort to stop him.
Realistically, you are not strong enough to hold Spencer in place. If he wanted to, he could push past you easily, but your hand on him could disarm a nuclear bomb if he was its power source.
“Don’t. Please. Stay.” You plead.
Like you ever have to ask.
Spencer settles back against the counter, one of his cold, bloody hands lifting to cup the back of your head, tilting your forehead back to his chest hold you there.
“By the same token, I could have prevented this, had I said what’s been unsaid.” Spencer murmurs into your hair.
“That’s way less fair than the point I made.” You remark, which has him smirking against the top of your head.
“Don’t get smart with me when I’m running on adrenaline.” Spencer warns playfully.
“Don’t get flirty when you just beat a guy to a pulp for disrespecting me.” You counter, causing him to scoff quietly.
“That reminds me, I must amend a previous statement.” Spencer says, and you can’t resist tilting your head back to look up at him, his hands immediately shaking free of their icepacks to cup your cheeks.
“Mhmm?” You press.
“I said all it would take for me to clock him would be him making you cry, this has proven to be incorrect. Based on my actions tonight, I can safely say if he made you cry, I would kill him.” Spencer speaks with a tone so soft you’d think he was complimenting you, his thumbs caressing your cheeks so tenderly while he threatens your ex’s very life.
“Wow. Big words for a man who hasn’t even taken me out on a first date.” You smirk.
“Moving a little fast, aren’t we, sunshine?” Spencer quips teasingly, his own smirk forming.
“A year of tiptoeing around each other while I was in a relationship is only moving a little fast by the standards of the romance novels you read, Doc.” You joke.
“Touché.” Spencer laughs fondly down at you. “Does this mean I can finally attempt to court you, fair lady?”
Butterflies that he singlehandedly commands, fly free in your stomach.
“I’d say so.” You answer softly, and Spencer breathes the deepest sigh of relief.
He leans down to rest his forehead against yours, ever so gently bumping his nose to yours in the most tender gesture of affection.
“Can I tell you a secret?” Spencer whispers, his breath fanning your lips.
“Anything.” You murmur.
Spencer smiles at the breathlessness he can already hear in your voice, solely caused by his proximity. Time slows to the most beautiful halt as he leans in, leaving the softest kiss at the corner of your mouth, barely even touching your lips.
“It was me who left a flower on your desk.”
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hotchscoffeecup · 7 months ago
Text
for her, i’d endure
pairing: emily prentiss x reader
rating: t
word count: 7.6k
genre: angst, hurt/comfort
warnings: torture, descriptions of blood/injuries, drugs
summary: When you and Emily are kidnapped by The Chameleon, an elusive unsub that team had been tracking for years, you’re forced to watch her endure torture at his hands. In the hospital, you reel from your own injuries and the guilt of not being able to stop anything from happening to her. Angst and hurt/comfort with a happy end.
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It’s hard to keep them open from the pain it causes you to try. You can’t help the slow drowsy blinking that follows. If they’re closed it doesn’t hurt as bad. Maybe this is a dream. Yeah, a dream. Just close your eyes and go to sleep, you tell yourself. You’ll feel fine in the morning.
Someone harshly whispers your name. You stir, but ignore it. Closing your eyes, you murmur something that isn’t quite a response, and try to welcome the darkness to take over. You just want to sleep whatever this is off…you try to at least. The harsh rasping whisper returns. There’s your name two, three times.
“Huh?” is all you can muster as you crack your eyes open once more. There’s a fluorescent light somewhere to your left, casting strange shadows over your field of vision. Your eyes burn. You want to close them again.
“Yes, that’s it!” cries the whisperer, “stay with me!” There’s an urgency in their voice, and as you take a few measured breaths, you gain more and more control over your senses. “Are you hurt?”
Emily. That’s Emily’s voice.
“My head,” you complain about the throbbing in your temples. “I think I hit my head.” You move to touch the side of your skull to assess the damage when your wrists don’t follow through with the command from your brain.
“What the—” There’s a sudden clarity that takes over as you hear the clatter of metal against metal. Your wrists are bound behind your back. You kick your legs out, or at least you try to. They’re bound too with zip ties to the legs of a metal chair that’s bolted to the floor.
“Don’t panic.”
“Emily?”
Fingers brush against yours from behind your back and you cling to them, though it’s awkward as you try to reach them. You’d know the feel of her hands anywhere. He’s got you and her back to back.
“I’m here,” she says soothingly, despite the edge in her voice.
“What happened?” you ask as your field of vision begins to clear and the picture of where you’re being held begins to form. It's dark save the fluorescent light you noticed earlier. There’s a few panels in the ceiling still flickering to life, though most are dark. Wires and cables hang haphazardly from the ceiling and water drips from a cracked pipe that stretches over the width of the room. The floor beneath your feet is concrete. You can’t see a door and the only windows are two small rectangles high near the ceiling. You’re underground. “Where are we?”
“The Chameleon,” Emily says after a short while.
Your heart skips a beat and you have to take a few measured breaths to keep the panic from creeping in. “You’re sure?”
The Chameleon, nicknamed such by the local media, is a serial killer that you and the team had been chasing across the East Coast for the last two years.You and the team didn’t care much for these nicknames as they often sensationalize the killer and detract from the victims, but it the name was fitting due to his nature to blend in to every environment he’s been a part of. This is largely due to how he is able to gain his victims' trust. Some of his known ruses include posing as law enforcement, a member of the clergy, other first responders, caretaker for a “lost” elderly patient, and more. He’d feign a scenario that caused the victims to unlock their doors, stop their cars, or otherwise pull their focus under the guise of safety. Once their guard was down, that was all he needed to ensnare them in his trap. Victims were initially blitz attacked, as evident by the bruising to their heads and faces, but as he evolved he began to dose them with heavy sedatives before taking them to a secondary location where he’d hold them for twenty four hours. During this time, he tortured his victims indiscriminately; sometimes cutting, sometimes burning, sometimes removing pieces of them or utilizing a combination of all three before ultimately succumbing to his need to kill. He favored a knife, often slitting the throats of his victims once he’d grown tired of playing with them. Despite his ability to blend in and kidnap his victims undetected, everything else originally pointed to someone just starting out, unsure of their preferences. However, this unsub evolved quickly. Victimology stopped differing and he’d settled on a pattern for women in their thirties, dark features, and often in roles that provided some sort of power. Though methods of torture varied, the rotation or combination of torture implicated states similar enough to create a pattern. He stuck to the routine, though. One woman every three months for the last two years. That was until recently. Now, a woman had been going missing weekly, suggesting a major deviation. Something had changed for this unsub, increasing his need to kill quicker and more often. Emily fits the victimology, but taking you too? It didn’t make sense? He’d never taken in pairs before.
“Fuck,” you mutter. You pull at the cuffs around your wrists, but they’re clamped too tightly. They don’t budge. “How long was I out?” you ask.
“Hours,” Emily responds. She sounds tired. “I don’t know how many.”
You blindly reach for her fingers again, this time with your other hand. When you brush against them, they’re slick with something.
“Emily?” you ask, concern edging into your voice. “What’s he done to you?”
“Cutting,” Emily answers clinically. “Left arm, chest, and right leg. They’re superficial.”
Red clouds your vision knowing he’d hurt the woman you love, and that you’d not been conscious enough to at least try to do anything about it. When you get your hands around this bastard’s neck…you yank hard against your restraints and hiss when all it does is cause the metal to dig deeper into your wrists.
“Baby, stop,” Emily whispers, keeping her voice low in case The Chameleon can hear. “We’ve been closing in on this guy. We just have to hope the team recognizes we’re gone before…” her voice trails off as a door opens.
Your heart stops and then starts, it’s usually steady beat now pumping erratically against your chest. You remind yourself to breathe, to take measured breaths to slow your heart and fight off the instinct to panic. The body’s natural inclination for self-preservation is astounding, but you couldn’t just think about yourself right now. You needed to be alert and look for anyway to wriggle into this guy’s psyche, anything to keep him from hurting Emily any further.
There’s a metallic clank as whatever door that’s out of your eye line slams shut. Heavy footsteps echo in the space and you count. Twenty four. There’s twenty four steps. You can’t fight the way your body tenses as a silhouette begins to emerge from the shadows. As the figure comes into focus, your eyes widen in surprise.
“Surprised to see me?” the man says, a twisted smile curving on his
“You know him?” Emily asks as she attempts to crane her neck to look at him.
You take in the man before you: white, mid-30s, average build, dark curly hair, and blue eyes wild with evil intent. You don’t know his name, but you've seen him before. You all had. Your mind flashes to each body dump where the team had investigated and gathered initial evidence to further flesh out the profile. You close your eyes and let your mind’s eye expand your field of vision to include the gathering crowd of onlookers. As you mentally guide yourself through each crime scene, you can clearly see him.
“You were there the whole time,” you say with a surprisingly level of calm as you open your eyes and meet his gaze directly.
He extends his arms to either side, a look-at-all-i-have-accomplished gesture, though there’s no audience save the two of you to take in his performance. “What can I say?” he says. “The media named me for my ability to blend in anywhere I go. I like the nickname, I do.” He points his finger at you as he begins to circle around you and Emily like you’re an injured seal in shark infested waters. “Though you profilers don’t like when these major news outlets do that. It sensationalizes the killer while taking away from victims.” He stops in front of you and bends at the waist to look you in the eye. You muster as much contempt into your gaze as possible.
“Good,” he snarls. “Those sluts aren’t worth remembering anyway. Any thoughts on that, agent?”
You nod. “Yeah, actually, I think I’m pretty tired of listening to you whine about your mommy issues.” A fire ignites in his eyes as you say this. You smirk. “Ooo, that did something. Did that strike a nerve?”
His lip curls as he takes a shuddering breath.
“I think I did, didn’t I?”
His knuckles collide with your face and there’s an explosion of stars behind your eyes as you feel your lip split in two. Emily calls your name and curses the unsub’s. There’s a buzzing in your ears as you blink the fog away. You sit up as best as you can and spit blood onto the floor. If his attention is on you, it’s not on Emily.
“Is that the best you can do?” you say, leveling your gaze back on The Chameleon. “You had to hit me from behind the first time. Are you scared to face a woman head on? Too much of a coward to face them? Or are you just too weak?” You incline your head toward your lap. “After all, you’ve got us tied up. Untie me and we’ll see just how well you do one on one.”
The Chameleon seethes, nostrils flaring as his rage blossoms. “You know nothing!” he bites.
“We know, everything.” You answer. He may not have been on the team’s radar, but you’ve seen this type before; a man that’s been forced into a submissive role and emasculated his entire life finally snaps and turns the tables on innocent women to make up for the lack of care he missed out on from a mother figure his entire life. He blames them because he can’t take his anger out on the person he wants to most. Mommy.
“Do you?” he sneers and you don’t flinch away from his hot breath on your neck.
“You’re easier to read than a children’s nursery rhyme,” you taunt.
The Chameleon snarls and this time his knuckles collide with the center of your face and there’s a sickening crunch. Blood pours from your broken nose onto the front of your shirt.
“Enough!” Emily shouts. “She’s not the one you want.”
You blink through the haze and blaring pain. Emily’s name is garbled as you try to say it, but there’s too much blood in your mouth. Just like the flickering gaze of a reptile, his eyes shift instantly to her. The desire that alights his face makes you want to throw up. She’s the one that fits the victimology. She’s the surrogate, the object of desire in his twisted fantasy.
“I think,” he says slowly, and you’re surprised you don’t see a serpentine tongue flicker between his lips. “That this next part will be more fun with an audience.”
Your vision shifts in and out of focus as you follow his movements. He shuffles just out of view of your peripheral vision and trying to force your eyes to see farther than they can exacerbates the splitting pain in your skull and face. Everything throbs. You can hardly see straight.
He returns with a syringe in hand. He holds it up for you to see. “Maybe I am weak,” he says bitterly. “But I’m the one in control and there’s nothing you can do about it.” He pushes the syringe into your arm and a slow, metallic heat creeps through your veins. Your limbs quickly grow heavy and your senses begin to dull.
Behind you, Emily pulls at her restraints. “Hey! What are you giving her? Leave her alone. You don’t want her, you want me.”
A choked laugh escapes the unsub as he cuts the zip ties at your ankles. You want to kick out at him and knock that smug look off of his face but the signals from your brain are cut off. Your body won’t follow the command your mind is ordering due to the drugs scrambling your system. Your eyelids are heavy. You want to close them. The unsub recognizes this and slaps at your face. “No, no. You can’t close your eyes, now. You’ve got a show to watch.” His lips twist into a sickeningly delighted smile. He slips a key from his pocket and undoes both sets of cuffs keeping you bound to the chair. You slump forward against him and he catches your weight easily. He wraps his arms around your waist and grunts as he hoists you over his shoulder. There’s static coursing through your limbs and despite every wish and desire to lift even a finger, your limbs don’t cooperate.
You slide off of him like rain down a windowpane, though instead of coming to a gentle stop you hit the ground like a stone thrown into a pond; all of your weight crashing down. Your head rattles against the wall and stars explode across your vision once more.
Emily calls your name and you try to focus on that. You blink and her form comes into focus. She’s bound in the same manner that you were in a chair exactly like yours. There’s blood staining her clothes, her blouse cut to ribbons and her pant leg tattered from where he slit it open with a knife; the same knife he used to cut into skin. Blood drips onto the floor.
She smiles at you and her gaze is so tender as her eyes meet yours. “Whatever he does to me, it is not your fault.” She’s soothing you. She’s about to endure more torture and she’s trying to comfort you.
You want to speak, to tell her you’re sorry, that you love her. You want to stand, to untie her and take her to safety. Most of all you want to put that unsub in the ground. A single tear leaks from your eye as The Chameleon wheels a tray table near Emily. The soft eyes she reserved for you steel upon seeing him.
He picks up a scalpel, his fingers gentle as he curls them around it; a stark contrast to the violence he inflicts with it. “Let’s get started, shall we?”
Emily licks her lips and raises her chin to look him in the eye, defiant in the face of danger. “I’ve already come back from the dead once before. At least if you’re successful, I know whose ass I’m haunting first.” She narrows her brown eyes to slits. “Come on, lizard boy. Let’s dance.”
Tears leak down your cheeks as you’re forced to watch what he does to her. She continues to taunt him, but her voice has grown weak. She’s losing too much blood.
“I wonder,” Emily says, her breathing labored. She lifts her gaze to meet the unsub’s. “You love that knife.” She inclines her chin toward the blade in his hand and his fingers twitch. “Tell me, is it because you can’t get up? Are our mommy issues too severe?”
A wild scream tears from his throat as he backhands her. A sharp grunt of pain leaves her lips but no scream. She sheds no tears for him. She’ll show no fear to him and allow him to feed off of her emotions like he did with his other victims, but he knows she must be feeling the weight of the torture, of the exhaustion settling in.
Her voice is tired, but her words are dagger tipped. “You’re not a man,” she spits blood on the ground, her teeth stained with it as she bares them at him. “You’re just a coward, a little boy missing mommy’s hand to guide him through your pathetic, wayward life.” Each word is sharp and articulated, a needle digging a little deeper and deeper into his flesh with each cutting syllable.
“Enough!” he bellows, spittle flying from his mouth as he lifts his arm. In one swift downward motion, he plunges the scalpel into her thigh.
She screams, her voice ragged and raw. A panicked sound bubbles in your throat, but the drugs overpower your ability to call out to her. Your fingers twitch as you try to summon any amount of strength to them, but to no avail. You can’t move them anymore that. You try to wiggle your toes and only feel a tinge of movement from them. Tears leak down your cheeks and drip off of your chin. The tear stains left behind are cold overtop of the dried blood smeared across your face from your broken nose, still throbbing with pain.
Emily sits hunched over, her shoulders heave with shuddering breaths. She’s breathing. She’s alive. She’s alive. She’s alive. The thought plays on repeat in your mind. If she dies, there is no place this slimy, spineless creature can hide where you wouldn’t be able to find him.
A strangled moan rumbles from behind your lips as The Chameleon approaches Emily. There’s a smirk on his lips as he brushes his fingers along her jawline. Just as quickly as the smirk appears, it dissipates as he shoves her face away from him, disgust twisting his features.
“I think I’ve had enough of you,” he grits through clenched teeth. “You’re all the same. There is no place for women like you. I’m doing the world a favor by getting rid of you.” He picks up another knife off the tray table and moves to stand behind Emily, knife poised beneath her throat. His shifting eyes fall on you and his smile returns. “I hope you’ve enjoyed the show.”
You feel your brow pinch as a wash of emotion floods through you. Your hand twitches and you manage to ball it into a fist, but you can’t force much more than that.
“Emi—” your tongue lolls inside your mouth and you can’t get her name out but it’s enough to get her attention. Her wavering brown eyes fall on yours and you hope she can feel your full apology and profession of love in your eyes as you await the inevitable.
“I love you,” she mouths and a sob shudders free from your own.
A single gunshot cracks through the air like a whip.
As the unsub slumps to the ground, Derek’s hulking frame comes into view. “He’s down!” He calls as he holsters his weapon and rushes to Emily. His hand moves to the knife in her leg.
“Don’t!” Emily warns. “Let the medics handle it. The keys to the cuffs are in his pocket.”
As Derek squats beside the unsub Hotch and Spencer clamber down the stairs, spilling into the room.
“We need medics,” Derek says to them, eyes filled with concern. “We need them now.”
“Copy that,” Spencer states as he presses against his earpiece and relays the information.
Hotch holsters his gun and rushes to your side. Crouching down, his hands smooth your hair back from your face to inspect the damage.
“Can you hear me?” he says. You blink heavily as his face comes in and out of focus. He repeats the question and says your name. He’s asking you to talk to him, but you can’t.
“He injected her with something,” Emily says weakly as Derek works to uncuff her. “A sedative or a paralytic, I don’t know. She can’t move. She can’t, she can’t—” Emily’s eyes flutter and roll back in her head. Your eyes widen as she slumps forward. Derek catches her before she can face plant the concrete and risk dislodging the scalpel sticking out of her thigh before the medics can do their job to ensure she’s not at risk of bleeding out, if she wasn’t already.
Your hand twitches, fingers jerking against your palm as a sound of desperation eeks past your still lips. Hotch presses his hand into yours and squeezes. His hard eyes meet yours and there’s pain and understanding in them. He’s born witness to seeing the love of his life killed by an unsub. It was something he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy. He had to hope that Emily would survive what she’d endured here tonight. He squeezes all of that hope into your palm as the medics crash down the steps, backboards and kits at the ready.
“She’ll be okay,” Hotch promises, though there’s a hint of doubt on the edge of his words. “You’ll be okay.”
As the medics make way and his hand slips free from yours, you can only hope and pray that what he says is true.
A gentle beeping is the first thing you hear as your senses slowly creep back to life. The sound is soft, but each punctuated tone sends a pulse of pain to the space behind your eyes.
Your eyes crack open and you squeeze them shut again as the bright white of the fluorescent lighting blinds you.
“Shit,” you hiss. Your voice is hoarse.
“Hey, you!” greets a female voice. Penelope’s voice.
“Too bright,” you grumble.
“Oh! Hold on!” Her heels click against the tile of the hospital floor, a switch flicks, and the light behind your eyelids darkens. You feel the relief immediately though the bruising around your eyes and throbbing pain reverberating through your nose and cheeks starts to overwhelm your senses as you become more alert.
You crack one eye and Penelope’s bright face comes into view. Her pink cat eared headband matches her glasses frames and lipstick. Her smile reaches her eyes and that only just eases some of the anxiety that floods your system, the only other thing you’re able to feel besides the pain. If Emily was dead, Penelope wouldn’t be able to look you in the eye right now.
“I need to see her,” you say, sitting up and immediately regretting it. The room spins and your hand flies to your head, fingers pressed against your temple in a poor attempt to stop the whirling sensation.
“Sweetie, oh my God, don’t—” she stands up and crosses the room, but you’re already pushing the sheets back.
You curse as you rip the IV from your arm, the tape holding it in place ripping out the hairs on your arm. Garcia tries to take hold of your hands, but you bury them inside the folds of the hospital gown as your fingers feel for the numerous electrodes tacked to your chest. Hooking the tips of your fingers around the wire once you find a place to bunch them together, one swift tug is all it takes to dislodge them. The machine beside the bed flat lines as it no longer receives your heart rate.
“Honey please don’t make me—” Her face scrunches as you move to stand. She sticks her arms out to block you from doing so “Oh, you’re going to make me, ok— Derek! Hotch!”
Her shouts are like a drill through your skull. You blink and black spots your vision as it blurs. The pain in your face is so intense, but you have to push through it. If Emily could endure what she did, you can push through this to get to wherever the hell they were keeping her in this goddamn hospital.
Hotch and Derek burst into the room, eyes frantic and scanning the scene. Morgan swiftly cuts through the space, swerving in front of Penelope and taking you by the arms. Garcia may have hesitated to stop you in your tracks but Derek has no reservations whatsoever.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he asks sternly.
Two nurses rush into the room and Hotch placates them with a gesture implying things are under control . He says something to them in a low voice and they glance your way once before nodding and leaving the space.
“I need to see her,” you say as you push against Derek, but in your current state you may as well be trying to push the Leaning Tower of Pisa upright.
His grip around your wrists is firm, but gentle; his hands placed just above the bandages from where the cuffs had bitten into your skin.
“She’s not awake yet,” Derek says. His features soften as he looks into your panic filled eyes. “She’s stable. She’ll be okay, and I promise you that the minute she wakes up I will take you to see her.”
“But Derek—”
He clicks his tongue. “No buts. You’re no use to her if you’re not well. You nearly overdosed on the drugs that man gave you. He broke your nose so badly, they had to re-break it to set it correctly. You have a concussion. Are you hearing me? You need to get your ass back in that bed.”
“Honey, listen to him.” Garcia adds, her voice equal parts soothing and concerned. “You can barely stand.”
You squeeze your eyes shut as hot tears well in your eyes. They slip down your cheeks and seep into the medical tape plastered to your face and nose. You draw in a shuddering breath as Derek guides you back into the bed. He presses a warm hand to your shoulder before stepping back and putting an arm around Garcia.
“Come on, mama, let’s go get a coffee while the nurses get her hooked back in.”
Penelope’s mouth drops into an o-shape as if she’s about to protest.
“I’ll stay with her,” Hotch assures her. “Go. I’ll call if anything changes.” That comforts her enough to let Derek steer her out of the room and into the hallway.
As the sound of their footsteps fade away, Hotch exhales a heavy sigh. The heels of his loafers click against the tile as he crosses the room and takes the chair Penelope had been occupying at your bedside.
“How are you feeling?” he asks as he reaches over and presses the call button to summon the nurses.
“Like someone cracked me in the face with a sledgehammer.”
A hint of a smile passes over your supervisor’s lips and a ghost of a laugh passes your own. You wince as the motion sends a new wave of pain rippling throughout your face.
“How bad is it?” you ask.
“The doctors say it should heal fine. They’re baffled that the break didn’t do any damage to your septum. The bruising will take time but you won’t need surgery so—”
You lift your eyes to meet his. “Not me, Hotch.”
His lips press into a firm line. “She lost a lot of blood,” he says after a moment. “In total, he cut her about fifteen times before stabbing her. She was right to tell Morgan not to pull the scalpel out. It was dangerously close to her femoral artery. The unsub was either incredibly calculated in avoiding it or it was dumb luck that saved her.”
Your brow pinches as his words sink in. “What was his name?”
Hotch’s chin dips in response to your question. “Carson Peters. He was a Vet Tech on the perimeter of the geographic profile. We never even interviewed him.”
“The whole time we never knew his name,” you breathe.
“If I know Emily, I’m sure she came up with a few,” Hotch remarks, trying to lighten the mood.
Your lips twitch, but a smile doesn’t take shape. There is an entire slew of names you’d wanted to hurl at the unsub, to say anything that would have taken his attention off of Emily for even a second but you couldn’t because of the drugs he’d pumped into you. You squeeze your eyes shut as an image of him cutting Emily flashes through your mind.
Hotch says your name. You hear the deep tenor of his voice, but it’s as though you’re underwater. Emily’s cries of anguish echo in your ears.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper as a tear leaks from the corner of your eyes. “Emily, I’m sorry.”
A firm hand slips into yours and you gasp, flinching from the contact. The image distorts and vanishes. You open your eyes and take a deep breath, dropping your gaze onto the hand in yours. You lift your eyes to meet Hotch’s hard stare. His fingers squeeze around yours and he nods.
“You’re safe,” he assures you. “Carson Peters is dead. He can’t hurt you, Emily, or anyone else ever again.”
Your fingers twitch around his as you blink back the onslaught of tears that want to pour out of you. “I couldn’t do anything.”
Hotch’s features soften. “I know.”
“I couldn’t stop him.”
“There’s nothing you could’ve done.”
You swallow the growing lump in your throat. Hotch squeezes your hand again, intentionally doing so to keep your mind from wandering. He’s keeping you grounded.
Your voice cracks when you speak. “I felt so helpless.”
“I know,” Hotch states as he levels his gaze on hours. His brown eyes waver as he speaks. “Witnessing a loved one’s abuse and not being able to do anything about it is a torture all its own. In our positions we have the authority to do something about it and in most cases, we can. When we can’t,” he pauses and takes a deep breath. “It’s natural to play it over and over again, to wonder where you went wrong, to think that somewhere along the line you could’ve done something, anything, to change the outcome.” His brow lifts toward his hairline. “We will kill ourselves ruminating on the what ifs and what could have beens.”
We. He’s not just talking about you anymore. He’s talking about his past when the unsub George Foyet killed his wife, Haley. You’d joined the team several years after her murder, but you’d been briefed fully on the case. It was well known to everyone in the BAU.
It’s your turn to squeeze his hand and you realize how out of the ordinary this exchange is. You’re as close to Hotch as anyone else on the team, but he’s not usually the touchy-feely type; the occasional half hug or handshake sure, but this level of vulnerability is uncommon.
A nurse walks into the room and Hotch stands to greet her. He shakes her hand and introduces himself formally; name, rank, and title. Establishing credibility for what, you wonder. He speaks in low tones and after a moment the nurse looks at you before looking back at him. She nods her head and he thanks her before she exits the room.
“What was that about?” you ask.
“A favor,” he answers as the nurse guides a wheelchair into the room.
“Five minutes,” the nurse says, aiming a pointed look at Hotch.
“Understood.”
The nurse leaves and Hotch pushes the chair up to the edge of the bed. He slips a hand behind your back to help stabilize you as he extends his other hand for you to grab hold of.
“Where are we going?” you ask as you take the proffered hand. You groan as you sit up and your head spins. You swear you can feel every bone in your face throbbing as pain threatens to split you in two.
“To see Emily.”
Your heart swells. You look at Hotch, eyes widening. “I thought—”
“I told the nurse you’d stay put and allow them to do their jobs and help you if you were allowed to see her. Hence, the five minutes.”
“Five minutes,” you repeat, nodding your head.
Hotch smiles reassuringly. “Five minutes.”
Slowly, Hotch assists with the transition from bed to chair. The shift exhausts you and it sinks in just how weak you are. However, the prospect of seeing Emily keeps you alert enough to push through.
The trip to Emily’s hospital room is short. She’s two right turns and one long hallway away from yours. The door to her room is cracked when you arrive and JJ opens it as Hotch reaches for the door.
“Sweetie!” JJ smiles brightly at you, though her eyes are tired. She leans down to pull you in a gentle hug, minding your face as she does so.
Her eyes flit between you and Hotch. “She’s in and out of consciousness. They’ve got her on some pretty strong painkillers, but she’s going to be alright.”
“Are you ready?” Hotch asks.
Your heart hammers in your ears, but you nod your head and whisper, “Yes.”
JJ steps out of the way so Hotch can wheel you inside the room. You raise your chin to peer over the threshold and whimper upon seeing Emily, hand moving to cover your trembling lips. She lies still beneath the sheets, which are pulled up over her lap. Her arms sit atop the sheet, her left arm bandaged from above the elbow to her wrist. Bandages peek out from beneath her hospital gown. An oxygen cannula is fitted under her nose and butterfly bandages hold close the split in her eyebrow. Hotch puts the brake in place after wheeling you right up to her bedside. He places a gentle hand on your shoulder. “JJ and I will be right outside. Five minutes,” he says.
Your eyes don’t leave Emily. “I understand.”
When the door clicks shut you let the floodgates open. You take Emily’s hand in yours, minding the IV jutting out from it, and cradle it to your cheek. “I’m so sorry,” you sob. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t do anything to stop what he was doing to you.”
You blink away the stars that dot your vision as each sob sends an intense wave of pain through the break in your nose and bruising under your eyes.
Emily’s thumb sweeps slowly across your cheek. You take a shuddering breath and swallow your tears as you turn your attention to her. Her eyes crack open and a small smile ghosts her lips.
You gasp and choke back a sob. The smile that splits your face sends a burst of pain through your bones, but you don’t care. It doesn’t matter. You’d feel this pain and all that she endured to see her warm, brown eyes on yours like they are now. Her smile, despite the pain meds dulling her senses, reaches her eyes and they’re so bright. As you look into them, for a moment you’re no longer in the hospital. You’re on a bench overlooking the Potomac and the sun is setting; its golden rays falling over Emily’s face and her eyes changed from brown to liquid gold. It was then you knew you’d never love looking into someone’s eyes as much as you loved looking into hers, that you’d never love anyone as much as you loved her.
You blink once and you’re back in the hospital. “I’m so sorry,” you blubber and clutch her hand to your chest. “Baby, I’m so sorry.”
Her voice is hoarse when she speaks, but the way she says your name is as soothing as ever. She shushes you and presses her fingers into your skin as she grips your hand. “Shh, baby, honey, look at me.”
You swallow and try your best to still your quivering lip as you raise your eyes to hers. Hers are focused as she looks at you. Her perfectly manicured eyebrows arch toward her hairline as she inclines her head toward you. “There is nothing that you could’ve done that would’ve prevented this, and that is okay.”
You squeeze your eyes shut and shake your head in refusal.
“Hey,” Emily says, pulling you back in. “Look at me.”
You sniff and take a deep breath as you open your eyes. “If anything,” she adds. “Your being there saved my life. He drew out the torture because he had an audience. If you hadn’t been there, there’s a chance he would’ve killed me before the team got to him. Do you understand?”
Your gut response tells you that she’s right, and you have to fight the part of your brain that’s telling you otherwise.
Her hand slips out of yours and reaches to cup your face, keeping her palm along your jawline to avoid your injuries.
She smiles and gestures to herself with her other hand. “Most of this is superficial anyway. The knife he jammed into my thigh will scar and take a while to heal, but that’s the worst that was done to me. I was,” she presses her lips together as tears glisten in her eyes. “I was so worried about you.”
Something between a laugh and a sob escapes your lips. “We make quite a pair, don’t we?”
Emily laughs in turn, the sound enough to make your heart swell three times over. “At least we’ll be able to spend our recovery together,” she says hopefully.
You smirk and tilt your head, considering. “My place or yours?”
Just then the door creaks open and Hotch steps inside. He smiles. “Sorry to cut the reunion short, but if I don’t get you back, I think the charge nurse will have my gun and badge.”
You all share a laugh. As he fixes the brake on the wheelchair, Emily tugs your hand toward her mouth and places a soft kiss to the backs of your knuckles. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”
You smile and nod as the tight feeling in your chest from before ebbs away. “Okay.”
As Hotch exits the room with you in tow, JJ hands you two cups of coffee. “For you and your watchdog,” she says with a nod towards Hotch.
You thank her and as Hotch pushes you back towards your room, you finally feel like things will be okay.
Two weeks later, you’re still on medical leave, but you feel as though you're getting back to normal. You’d been released from the hospital first and a few days later, Emily. Her apartment was bigger, so you’d gone to yours and with help from Penelope packed a bag. It was easier for you two to be in the same place knowing how often the team would be checking in.
Garcia had stayed over with you, helping you keep track of the medications the doctors had prescribed. She helped take care of Sergio too. The little guy had been all too happy to see you, weaving in between your legs and rubbing his furry head against your calves. When Emily returned home a few days later he couldn’t stop meowing. When she rested, he’d fall asleep beside her or curled up in her lap.
Just as expected, members of the team had been through in pairs, on their own, or as a whole. Penelope stopped in daily with coffees and pastries from the shop next to Emily’s building. Derek came by every other day, occasionally with Savannah when her work schedule allowed. She’d checked Emily’s wounds a few times from your insisting as you were worried about infection. Savannah assured you each time that Emily was and would continue to be fine so long as she kept up with changing her bandages and taking the antibiotics she’d been prescribed. Hotch had only visited once, which was unnecessary but still so kind of him. You knew he often stayed late working to ensure everyone else could go home on time. He did this all while balancing his responsibility as a father and the fact that he sacrificed a little bit more of his personal time just to check in on you two meant so much. Rossi had sent homemade Italian with Penelope or Derek. This week you’d been given enough carbonara to feed an army.
You’re fixing two bowls now for you and Emily, a late dinner as you’d both fallen asleep around 3pm and napped until 7pm no thanks to the pain medicines that kept you two on relatively similar sleep schedules. You shred some parmesan and sprinkle it over the top before sticking a fork into each.
“I’ve got dinner!” you call as you make your way back to the bedroom.
“Thank god, I’m starving.” You push open the door with your hip and place the bowls on Emily’s bedside table.
You lean down and kiss her, wincing slightly. The bruising around your eyes and cheekbones has gone down dramatically, but your nose was still bound and held in place by a splint and medical tape. The doctors say in about a week or so, it should be healed completely but to still exercise caution with day to day activities.
Emily rests on top of the covers. Her hair is up and out of her face in a loose ponytail, pieces of which had fallen out while sleeping and now stick to and around her face in various places. You try your best to smooth them down before cupping her chin in your hand. You smile and stroke your fingers along the smooth skin of her jaw before dropping your hands to pull the throw blanket down off of her waist, exposing her legs, bare except for the plaid pajama shorts she wears and bandages wrapped around her thigh.
She shivers in response to the air against her legs. “Sheesh, give a girl some warning!” she protests and you throw her a cheeky grin.
You open the bedside drawer and retrieve the supplies to clean and dress her wound. “We should finish the rest of that movie,” you suggest as you climb onto the bed to kneel beside her. Using a small pair of scissors, you carefully snip away the bandages to reveal the square gauze pad covering the wound. “I want to know how it ends and we keep falling asleep.”
Emily snorts. “That’ll happen when we both take narcotics before bed thinking we’ll make it to the end.”
“Yeah, but,” you remove the gauze and inspect the incision, searching for any signs of infection around the twelve carefully placed stitches. As you squeeze a bit of the antibacterial ointment onto your finger and gently rub it over the spiky black threads of the sutures, you can’t help but think of how much it resembles the caterpillars that used to invade the trees in your backyard as a kid, a story Emily did not care for your retelling when you first did this. “It shouldn’t be so hard to make it through a two hour movie.”
“I still can’t believe you’ve never seen The Parent Trap,” Emily says, bristling as your fingers rub over a particularly sensitive area.
You apologize as you lay a fresh gauze pad over the wound. Your fingers move quickly as you unroll and wind a new roll of bandages to keep the gauze in place. When you finish, you wipe your hands off and gently massage the skin around her thigh knowing it helps to stimulate blood flow to the area.
Emily moans in response to the treatment. Her head lolls to the side and she peeks at you from behind long lashes. “I can’t wait to show you how grateful I am for your incredible nursing skills.”
You arch a brow at her as a smile quirks at the corner of your mouth. “Down girl,” you tease playfully.
Emily bends her opposite leg, raising her heel to curve around your body. She pokes her toes up under your tee shirt and your back stiffens as they touch your skin. You reach behind your back and grab her by the ankle, chastising her as you laugh and place it back on the mattress. “Emily!”
“What??” she asks, laughter tumbling from her full lips.
“We’ve not been cleared yet for that!”
She pouts in response and you clamber over her, carefully, so as not to disturb the injuries of her leg. You straddle her waist and lean down to place a soft kiss along the curve of her jaw. “Trust me, I want to get back to that as much as you do.” Your eyes drop to the swell of her breasts, her nipples poking through the thin fabric of her camisole. “But you and I both know neither one of us are capable of having gentle sex, and I don’t think our doctors would be happy if we did anything to make this take any longer than it already is.”
Emily groans in frustration. “Stupid doctors and their stupid orders.”
You laugh as you lean down to grab your dinners off her nightstand. Carefully, you lift your leg and roll over her body to your side of the bed; passing Emily her bowl as you do so. You reach down and pull the throw blanket up over both of you as you snuggle into the uninjured half of her body. She turns and places a kiss on your temple as she grabs the remote and clicks on the tv.
As she twirls pasta around on her fork, she turns to you and smiles. “I’m glad you’re here with me,” she says, eyes twinkling.
You smile in turn. “I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be than with you here, right now, at this moment in time.”
“I love you,” she says.
“Not as much as I love you,” you answer.
“Impossible,” Emily promises.
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killerlookz · 7 months ago
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Hello my fellow Criminal Minds fan! 😊
May I please request headcanons for Spencer falling for a female agent who’s cynical about love and relationships due to being hurt in the past?
a/n: thank you sm for the request! i'd be happy to write this for you! :-)
Falling in Love Again | Spencer Reid Headcannons
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pairing: spencer reid x f!reader
content: mentions of reader having been cheated on in the past, uhhhh that's really it haha
word count: 1,478 (sorry she's so long)
Spencer Reid had always been excited about falling in love, the thought of being so close to another person- to share so much with someone was such a wonderful thing to him.
Especially after watching his mom and dad growing up, and the way his father treated her-Spencer was dead set on never becoming anything like him, he looked forward to treating a woman right and spending the rest of his life with her.
But, for as excited as he was he was probably 20 times more nervous about the whole falling in love thing.
So when you came around, and he started to experience that warm, creeping feeling in his chest- he felt a little bit like his world was going to end.
Spencer had never made a move on anyone before, sure he did make out with Lila Archer that one time but he didn't exactly initiate it.
Spencer decided just to channel all of his romantic interest in becoming friends with you, at least he got to spend time with you, that's what really mattered to him. Maybe one day it would turn into something more.
Well.. he hoped until he couldn't help but overhear...
"I went on my first date in months last night, and all this guy did was talk about himself the entire time- didn't let me get a word out, I mean, can you believe it?" Emily says, exasperated
You look up at her as she stands in front of your desk, "Oh, trust me Emily, I can believe it." You shake your head
"I mean," She throws her hands up, "What is it with men? What's wrong with them."
"Everything," You smirk, "They're men. I can't remember I had a good experience with one of them- never maybe?" You laugh. "I've given up on dating."
Your words sunk into Spencer's brain, leaving him with a heavy feeling all around he felt awful- not just about the fact that his chances with you seemed to reduce to zero right there in that moment, but because of how upset you seemed under your sarcastic exterior, he could tell you'd really been hurt before.
A few weeks later you're out for drinks with Emily, Penelope, Morgan, Spencer, and JJ. Amidst the loud, drunken conversations and music at the bar- you can hear the faint chiming sounds of your ring tone, Who would be calling this late?
As you take your phone from your pocket, your stomach drops when you see the number flashing on the screen. The mere sight of those 10 digits making you want to throw your phone to the ground and stomp on it until nothing remains.
"Ooooh, who's that calling." Morgan smirks
You look him dead in the eyes and respond flatly, "My ex."
Morgan's smile doesn't fade instead his smirk seems to deepen, "You two got a little thang goin on?"
"No," You shove your phone back in your pocket, "More like he's trying to get back in my pants after cheating on me- twice."
"Ooh!" Morgan responds, wincing, "So he's a dog."
"A pig is more like it." You scoff, "Who does he think he is. I can't even imagine giving my time to another man again, and even if I could- what makes him so confident I'd give him the time of day."
That familiar heavy pain hits Spencer again.
He's staring at you, and it's like the rest of the bar doesn't even exist. Only you, as you bite your lip, trying to hide any emotion in your face.
Spencer has become good at reading your emotions, maybe it's because he spends so much time with you- maybe it's because of how often he finds himself staring at your face. As much as you try to seem nonchalant, he could tell how upset you are.
Spencer would spend more time than he wanted to admit fantasizing about treating you well, about giving you the love you never seemed to have.
Every time you made a snarky comment about love, or how men had treated you in the past Spencer would want so desperately bad to just tell you about how well he would treat you, how he would never ever hurt you, how he would spend his entire life taking care of you.
The words were practically scratching up his throat, begging to be let out. But still, he would just swallow them down, and give you a sympathetic look, he couldn't muster up being able to do anything more.
At the very least, Spencer's plan of becoming friends with you was working.
The two of you would become very good friends.
Spencer would learn everything he could about you, he would want to know as much as possible.
Not in a weird creepy way- but in a he just thinks you're so amazing he can't get enough of you sort of way.
Every time you and Spencer hung out he wouldn't be able to ignore that nagging feeling, the thought of putting an arm around you and pulling you close, of holding your hand in his, or placing a delicate kiss on your cheek.
The thoughts would eat away at Spencer, and he would only fall more, and more in love with you.
Still, he would lose more hope every time you divulged information about your prior encounters with love. He couldn't blame you for feeling so cynical it, not after what you'd been through.
Spencer would think about his mom, about all the wives Rossi had been through, about Hotch and Hailey, about you- he would wonder why love had to be so painful for some people. He was sure he would never hurt somebody he loved.
One day you're over Spencer's apartment, watching a rom-com, and you make a snide remark, "Oh, real love isn't like that." You scoff and roll your eyes.
Spencer doesn't know what it is, but something in him makes him respond, "It could be." He says meekly
You look up at him, caught off guard at his disagreement, "Hm?" you hum
Spencer wasn't able to take it any more, he hated hearing your cynical nature. He would need you to know how you deserved the entire world.
"Love- It can be like the movies." He affirms his stance.
"Not in my experience."
"I would give you love like that." Spencer would tremble as he makes his confession, so unsure of what would happen next.
He would be terrified of your reaction, scared he was about to mess everything up, ruin any future the two of you had together, and even worse, lose your friendship.
"W-what do you mean, Spence."
"I mean, you always talk about how you've been hurt before, and it just-" He takes a deep breath in, contemplating what he's going to say next, "I love you, y/n," He looks down at his lap, then back up at you, "I would never hurt you."
Despite the obvious passion in Spencer's voice, you were still hesitant about it, but everything inside of you told you to give Spencer a chance.
Spencer would insist on taking things slow, you were his first real relationship and he wouldn't want to rush things, for both his and yours sake. He wouldn't pressure you to put a label on things, or even say you're "dating"- those would come on your own time.
Spencer was determined to make you believe in love again, and he would do everything in his power to make sure you knew without a doubt how he felt about you.
Spencer would often get to work before you to surprise you with coffee and a breakfast sandwich, or a donut on your desk in the mornings.
He would insist on having a date night at least once a week, even if the two of you were on a case, ordering room service or finding a local pizza restaurant way late at night was sufficient, as long as the two of you got to spend time together.
Spencer would be hesitant about PDA or really moving too quickly into being too affectionate, still, he would frequently hold your hand, squeezing it tight when he could tell you were stressed or upset- either by a case or by life in general, he just wanted to give you that extra reassurance that he was there for you.
Spencer would really put the work in, he'd exert more effort than you had ever seen from any past relationship into even the tiniest things.
Spencer wouldn't mind though, anything he could do to reassure you that he loves and cares about you, he would do it.
Every little act of love and gratitude would be worth it to him.
He would savor and cherish every hug, every shared glance, every peck on the forehead, on the cheek, on the lips.
It was all worth it to him, every second of it- all he wanted to do was make you smile, to make you fall in love again.
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chvoswxtch · 7 months ago
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hello, can i get a macchiato (barista’s choice of over ice) with what it would be like for spencer to come home to you after a hard case/long day?
hi nonnie!
one macchiato coming right up :)
headcannon below the cut
spencer reid has a hard day
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spencer is a talker. maybe not always a conversationalist, but a talker. there's a million & one fun facts constantly running through that genius brain of his that he's always eager to share
you'd learned early on in your relationship that asking him something as simple as "how was your day" could turn into a fifteen minute tangent on the origin of that phrase before he even got to answering your question
needless to say, you can tell when he's had a really long day, or when a case has been particularly hard, because he's quiet
typically when the jet lands, he's calling you before the wheels even touch the ground to let you know he's home, but when it's been a long day or a hard case, he'll send you a short text instead
he doesn't greet you as enthusiastically when he walks through the door, & he's not talking a mile a minute. his greeting is quiet & strained, & you can see the deep shades of exhaustion beneath his eyes
even the way he walks is off, & you can almost see whatever it is that's getting to him is weighing down on him
instead of immediately seeking you out to join you in the kitchen or the living room or wherever you are, he'll head straight towards the bedroom instead
physical touch is not one of spencer's love languages, or something he enjoys in general, but on days like this, the comfort of your touch is something he wants, but he just still doesn't know how to ask for it
throughout the course of your relationship, you've learned how to read him. you've learned how to tell what he needs & when he needs it, relying on his body language & nonverbal cues when he can't seem to get the words out
you picked up on the way the tension would leave his shoulders when you hugged him, or how he'd exhale a deep breath of relief when you kissed his cheek. he practically melted into your embrace when your fingers gently moved through his mess of curls, & lightly scratching at his scalp made him putty in your hands
when he comes home like this, you don't bother with asking him if he wants to talk about it. you know he'll automatically say no, not wanting to burden you with his troubles, but also bc he's still learning to express himself emotionally
so you follow him into the bedroom, & you climb into bed with him, & you let him know that you're there, physically but also mentally
you wait patiently for him to accept the comfort of your touch, & even when he's laying with his head on your chest & his arms wrapped tightly around your waist, you wait for him to speak first. sometimes he wants to try & talk about what's bothering him, & sometimes he just wants to feel something pure & good
you'll never forget the first time he explained to you why he prefers to lay in silence sometimes. it still tugs at your heartstrings even months later
"everyday, I see the worst of humanity. some cases, there's a happy ending. sometimes we make it just in time to save at least one person, and sometimes that feels like it's enough. but some days...it doesn't make up for the extent of the depravity that we witness. it doesn't make up for the people we couldn't save. I spend every single day surrounded by violence and chaos and...evil. but when i'm with you...that all goes away. I don't want to think. I just want to focus on the good."
recently, you'd introduced spencer to a little game you & your mom used to play when you were younger. when something was scary, or when you had a bad day, you'd ask her to tell you something good, & she'd tell you some highlight from her day, or the first good thought that came to mind
you've learned to identify the long days vs the hard days depending on if he wants to play or not. if it's just been a really long day & he's tired, he doesn't usually participate. but if he comes home after a case that really affected him, it's almost painful to hear the need in his voice when he asks
"tell me something good. please."
hugging him even closer, like you're trying to protect him from all the bad things outside of your shared bedroom, you gently kiss his forehead & whisper softly
"the universe is infinite. there are galaxies and solar systems out there that haven't even been discovered yet, and may never be. our world has existed for millions of years, and yet, i'm lucky enough to get to exist at the same time as you. the stardust that created our universe, and our world, is the exact same stardust that we're made of, which means you and I have always been connected, even long before we existed, and we still will be long after we're gone. it's always been you and me, and it always will be."
lifting his head to look at you, spencer's hazel eyes are full of curiosity & awe. he knew you were smart, maybe nowhere near a genius like he was, but still very smart. however, he was the one with the science background, so to hear you speak so eloquently about space caught him off guard
"where did you learn that?"
rolling your eyes with a soft laugh, you shook your head & smirked at him
"i love you, too."
a faint blush creeps on his cheeks, & he gives you a small sheepish smile
"sorry...i...i do love you. that...that was beautiful. i just-"
cutting him off, you reach over onto the nightstand & pickup your copy of "astrophysics for people in a hurry", holding it up for him to see. he glances between the small book & you in puzzlement, & you smirk at him
"i'm trying to keep up with my genius boyfriend."
for the first time since he's walked through the door, spencer smiles. a real, genuine, smile. taking the book from your hand, he sets it aside & shakes his head, gently cupping your cheek
"i don't need you to do that. i just need you to be with me."
letting out a soft laugh, you lean into his touch & place your hand on top of his
"did you hear anything i just said? i've always been with you, and i always will be. we're bound by the stars, pretty boy."
spencer's lips split into a wide grin, & now that his mood is considerably lighter, he leans in for a soft kiss
"can't argue with science."
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piqtescue · 2 years ago
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no words tbh
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only-one-brain-cell · 1 year ago
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Spencer as the #1 Garvez shipper because he’s not as gullible as everyone thinks he is about relationships and KNOWS Luke is in deep and when he hangs out with Penelope all she can talk about is “the new guy” or “newbie” so he drops little hints about Penelope to Luke just to see his reaction and vice versa.
“That’s Penelope’s favourite tea”
“That’s Lukes favourite food”
“Penelope’s hair looks nice today.”
Luke: I didn’t notice (he noticed) but now that you mention it *goes on a tangent*
“Luke’s haircut looks nice”
Penelope: he got a new haircut? Oh I didn’t realize (she realized) and just doing little things like that being each others wingman. No one notices because as the genius gentle puppy of the BAU everyone thinks Spencer is just being his usual kind self.
Spencer is a fucking mastermind think god he uses his powers for good and not evil.
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truly-yours-matilda · 11 months ago
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— welcome to my blog!!
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headcannon masterlist
blurb masterlist (not anything yet)
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starandcloud · 2 months ago
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Jason Gideon headcannon
He has night terrors after Sarah's death, like ones that he'd wake himself up screaming
Criminal Minds Mainlist
Mainlist
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lucyswinter · 11 months ago
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.-‘*•_aaron hotchner dating hcs .•*-.’💗’-.•*
pairing: aaron hotchner x girlfriend!reader
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genre: fluff
warnings: some sexual-ish stuff implied
♡ ♡ ♡
-the two of you met after a mutual friend set you up on a blind date. aaron had been a little scared because he thought he was too old to date after his divorce, but after he met you, he was immediately in love
-despite his quite serious demeanour at the BAU office, hotch is such an affectionate and cutesy boyfriend. always showing you and kisses and cuddling you
-he looooves to give you my pet names/praise. “pretty girl” “my love” “sweet girl” “mmm youre doing great sweetheart” “good girl, just like that”
-his groggy morning voice is really sexy and low and he loves to talk to you as soon as he wakes up because he knows it makes you blush
-cuddling is his favorite thing to do at any point in the day. you guys just woke up? he’s pulling you in for the first snuggle of the day. he’s tired after work? his arms are already around you. the two of you are winding down to go to bed? you’re falling asleep in his arms
-after a long day of talking to people and giving orders at work, he loves to listen to you talk about it your day. “oh, sorry am i rambling a little bit?” “no, sweet girl, not at all. i love listening to you, baby.”
-he’s really touchy in a protective way and always has his hands on you. an arm around your shoulder, holding your hand, arm around your waist, slowly snaking down towards your ass
-he doesn’t like to talk about work very much, mainly because it gets pretty heavy sometimes, and he doesn’t want to freak you out by telling you about creepy cases
-first time you ever visited hotch at the office, everyone was absolutely appalled by how sweet he was to you and how quickly he changed as soon as you walked into the room-
-“morgan, this is the last time im going to tell you- oh, oh hey pretty girl! what at you doing here?” “you just forgot the lunch i made you at home so i decided to bring it to you :)”
-derek and garcia are very freaked out at this side of him and keep pestering him because they didn’t know you two were dating. “who are you and what have you done with hotch?” and all he can do is roll his eyes and turn his attention back to you.
♡ ♡ ♡
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