#cranky newt

[promisesbutnevertokeep]

I’m just saying. Sappy romance is boring. I don’t want cute picnic dates, I want to contract a deadly disease that will turn me into a cannibalistic shell of a person while you tell me everything is gonna be okay while I try to stab you and we fight to the death and “please *insert name* please” you while you try to console me and stall until you get a cure for me but I end up getting romantically shot.

is that too much to ask for?

[madieflaw]

[hislittleraincloud]

Fucking Hell, I mention W🤮y🤮l🤮e🤮r once in the Yoko post and all of a sudden I'm getting that 💩 all over my feed, so I guess it's time for another Fuck that Monster.

ETA: Even the "romantic candles" during the date weren't Tyler's. They were Laurel's, and she moved them to where they needed to be for the Zombie Crackstone Ritual ambiance.

Every...single...thing...he did, he did for Laurel. Hell, even the ill-fated Legally Blonde date was forced at the point that it was because Tyler now knew for certain that Wednesday had Faulkner's Diary--something that Laurel was looking to get her hands on in Episode 3--so he had to have reason to separate her from it to give Laurel enough time to go get it a la Ginny fucking Weasley trashing Harry's room in Chamber of Secrets. (I need to make a Fuck those Writers series, especially since Faulkner's Diary is nothing more than Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them....)

"Hermione, the diary isn't the only thing that was stolen from me..."

I just want gen Wednesday gifsets and posts, but that can't even happen here because if I do any type of search in the tags, I get drowned in /Tyler and /Sinclair stuff. But there are better things for me to whine about, so...

I get it, there is a desperate need to pair Wednesday with the 'obvious' (either the barista or the roommate), but I s2g, none of that makes a concerted effort to understand an adolescent whose mind really is, in some ways, more emotionally mature for her age. And fuck the writers for making her flip at the end of Ep 7 towards this guy who she worked so hard to say NO to throughout the previous six episodes.

As for Tyler's 'feelings' he may have developed, it's the inversion of Stockholm Syndrome called Lima Syndrome.

All of which vanished the minute he called her a cockroach and tried to kill her in the Dark Forest forest around Nevermore.

Fuck that monster. 💩✨

[newtstesco]

Do you think that SMG34 has become a gag just like Plabs from SpongeBob?

you know what i can’t even tell if they’re queerbaiting at this point or making fun of it bc at this point every week i’m expecting a whole episode revolving around smg4 and smg3 or mario taking part in a trend, and it’s kinda wearing me down. commit to smg34 and make it cannon so we can move onto other characters, it’s not really a gag, it’s more like they have a genuine connection and glitch productions just keeps messing with fans by showing them holding hands and trapped in an elevator, it was definitely a gag when snowtrapped was released but at this point it’s not funny, just my opinion, but it’s getting a little grating only focusing on a few characters when you have a whole world built out to experience, like bloopersville, or kevin’s school, or literally anything besides just smg34

[jedi-kat-18]

what would happen if newt got the ankle monitor off?

He'd bolt out the door as fast as possible, high on the thrill of victory, visions of apocalyptic destruction dancing through his head, then run right into Hermann coming back from the grocery store. When they both fall on their butts, Hermann quickly notices that the ankle monitor is missing. Then he has to wrangle it back on to Newt, which is kind of like trying to put a collar on a very angry cat, if that cat was the size of a full grown man and was yelling about how much he hates you.

[indig0trolls]

Lays down in the dirt

[normal-newt]

Blog post forecast : Cranky migraine posting

[m30wk1ttycat]

newt, newt x reader headcanons!!

newt, who is a sucker for any type of pet name, or just a nickname. sweet boy, darling, love, newtie - whatever it is, he's melting the second it comes out of your mouth.

he feels like his heart skips a beat whenever you kiss his forehead or just dote on him. blushy boy newt!! he's so adorable when he blushes. denying whatever you're saying, he's looking the other way when you point it out just to tease him. but he knows - and you do, too - that he's so obviously red like a strawberry.

you're never getting rid of him if you offer to cuddle. he's especially clingy in the morning, right after he wakes up - or, in some cases, when he stays up all night, and is grumpy because he couldn't rest, which somehow makes him even clingier.

newt would have a horrible sleep schedule, with all the work, as the second-in-command. like mentioned before, he's cranky when he doesn't get enough sleep.

newt loves it when you play with his hair. it's just something about how gentle you're being, it's making him feel so safe, so cared for.

he gets so embarrassed when his voice cracks. it's adorable, hearing the oh so cool and strong second-in-command's scratchy voice in the mornings or when he'd get sick, but he personally hates it.

daisies are his favourite flower, either to keep or give.

newt, since he's a track-hoe, always makes sure to bring you something from the gardens - flowers, fruit, veggies, anything he can plant and give to you. newt x runner!reader headcanons

newt would hate that you're a runner. he, as a former runner, despises alby for making you a runner. he hates it, he really does, even though he knows you're capable of running in the maze for hours, without getting hurt, he still can't help but worry. he'd watch the maze from afar, waiting for you to come back with the other runners. he doesn't believe in god or isn't religious in any way, but he's still praying for you to make it out safely.

he'd hug you tightly, and make sure you're okay after your run. if you got hurt, he'd help you to the med-jack's hut, and then take care of you. newt x med-jack!reader headcanons

newt would find a way to visit you, even if he was supposed to be working in the gardens.

either offering to walk a track-hoe that got hurt, or him being the one that was hurt, specifically asking for you to tend to him. not that he didn't trust the other two med-jacks, but he prefered you to take care of his injuries, so he could talk to you.

when you'd hear jeff or clint tell you that newt was here, you'd always get worried. why? because you still haven't forgotten the 'accident' in the maze when he broke his leg. you were the one who patched him up, after all. mind racing, you secretly hoped he didn't attempt again, because then you wouldn't know how to react. would you forgive yourself? would you not? (i'm so sorry!!)

thankfully - sort of -, newt was only feeling unwell, or just had a minor injury that would heal in a week or two.

he'd praise about how you're so smart when you wouldn't hesitate to answer a medical question. newt would then ask you about your day as you tend to him, watching you or your work.

this is short, i know - i'll add more stuff, i swear!!

[promisesbutnevertokeep]

‘You gave me your heart, you know? you‘d like me to hand it back, whole again, but i won’t. you‘ll live a long time yet tommy, an eternity without me. you will look into the faces of passers by, hoping for something that will for an instant, bring me back to you. you will find moonlit nights strangely empty because when you call my name through them there will be no answer. always your heart will be aching for me and your mind will give you the doubtful consolation that you did a brave thing.’

that audio but newt and Thomas. Thomas alone in the safe haven with his conscience.

[batmanfruitloops]

Some of my furry drawings from over the last year:

Gilda is a fossa! And Harvey's design isn't really accurate anymore, but Fluffy's drawn him better in another post,

Also cranky penguin Oz is way more adorable than he should be, considering all the horrible things he's done.

And oop- snuck a little Nora who's an arctic fox

Abner is a newt! Isn't he cute?! Also he shouldn't have claws, I was confused when I first drew him. Also flustered Abner is love, it is life;

Probably has my favorite little doodle in the bottom left corner. Look at Bruce's little bat face!

And a whole page of the sillies to end off this post,

- Sarsee

[ermdotorg]

"Kute" by Alex G has me in a CHOKEHOLD right now.

it's about a clearly unhealthy relationship with demeaning/praising (and possibly cannibalism) that i felt mended well with how newt probably felt in tdc when he was a wee bit cranky :p

[fink0680]

That meme where it’s like “paying attention to my cat’s interests so she knows I care about her” and it’s like someone watching their cat stare out the window or smthn except it’s Thomas watching crank Newt being cranky or some shit

[flock-talk]

Mr newt is a bit cranky today and really not wanting Toto and Toto has been an excellent man trying to diffuse tension and give Newt ample space

[jedi-kat-18]

OH ALSO DOMESTICATION, something like, hurt comforty between hermann and newt? newt in pain/frustrated and hermann helping his feral roommate. Prompt, but if it doesn't fit, you don't have to use it: for the last time, i don't want your help!

"For the last time, I don't want your help!" Newt snapped. He swatted Hermann's hand away, his body shaking, eyes wide. "Newton." Hermann said softly. "I was only trying to--" "Well stop trying!" Newt snarled. "It's not gonna work!" There were tears in his eyes. "Why are you even doing this!?" "I already told you, I want to help you get better!" Hermann said. "Why is that so hard for you to believe!?" "Because you hated me!" For a moment, neither of them said anything. They just stood there. Hermann didn't know to respond. Newt was shaking, his fists clenched, tears streaming down his face. "I mean him." Newt's voice was faint, and hoarse. Like he was forcing the words out of his mouth. "You hated him." Hermann said nothing. He simply rested a hand on Newt's shoulder, and slowly, gently, pulled him into a hug. Newt broke down sobbing, and somehow, his hands ended up clinging to Hermann's shoulders. They didn't let go for a long time.

[normal-newt]

Very tired. My medication is helpful but... if circadian rhythm changes, means stay up all night, then have to take waking up medicine.

Just want a nap.

[misty-moth]

Rereading Newt’s route after a year is affecting meee

He’s so cute and precious and he’s a cranky old man with a heart of gold and and