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kidney9-9 · 4 years ago

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Summer Vacation

Anonymous asked:

heyyyyy, if you are taking smutty requests could you do one where Toms family and the readers family are really close and go on holiday together but Tom and the reader hate each other. Throughout the holiday the keep teasing each other just to take the piss but eventually it gets too much for them, then their families go out but they don’t go and it’s becomes too much and they f*ck😏 and then after they are kissing and their families come home and think finally(im a sucker for enemies to lovers)

hi anon! hope you like this! before you read, please read the warnings! No mention of protection but can be imagined :)

Masterlist

Tom Holland x Reader (Smut with plot) Warnings: cursing, anger, kitchen sex, enemies-to-lovers, harsh teasing (non-sexual), dom!Tom, and oral sex (female receiving) Word Count: 4.7k

When you learned your family booked their annual summer vacation with the Hollands, you complained. The son, Tom Holland, also known as that one fucking asshole who threw sand in your eyes as a kid, was the main reason of your complaint. Since the day he threw sand in your eyes, the two of you despised each other, always jabbing each other with mean insults or shady comments. He was the reason you absolutely fucking hated vacations with your family.

He always called you “cow-girl” because of the unfortunate incident of a cow stepping on your foot during one of the vacations. You always hated when he would call you that, especially around other groups of people, other than your families. It caught on during elementary school, and you were teased the rest of the year because of it. On the other hand, you started calling him “poop-boy” after he tripped and slipped right into the cow poop after that same cow stepped on your foot.

Your families always teased the two of you, always telling you that you would be a great married couple. The two of you would instantly deny their teasing, which was the one thing the two of you had in common. Your dad always jokingly patting Tom’s back, telling him, “Oh, welcome to the family, son.” Which always made you uncomfortable as well. Whenever your family met any of the people you dated, they’d compare them to Tom, which made you hate him even more.

Hate was a strong word, but that was the only thing close enough to what you could describe your feelings of him. Even though you “hated” Tom, you couldn’t help but admit he was fucking hot. It made things even worse after seeing him on vacation, with only a pair of swim trunks on, and immediately thinking about how you wanted to jump his bones and shout at him.

He was lounging on the sunbeds of the summer house your and his family rented together this summer on a sunny beach when you got there. He had a beer in a hand and sunglasses on, talking to his brother and not bothering to look over to you and your family. His mom greeted all of you with a warm smile, “Welcome guys! It’s lovely to see you all here! How have you been?” You smiled politely back at her as she and your mom started animatedly chatting. Your dad sent you a grin and then looked over to the boys, “Hey Tom! Harry, come over here!” He called out with a wave.

Harry was such a sweetheart. You had no idea how he was related to Tom, because of how sweet he was to you all the time. He would call you big sis, and the two of you would always hang out the most during vacations. You looked over to the two of them, smile dropping as Tom lifted his sunglasses and glared at you.

What a lovely greeting, you thought, as him and Harry strolled closer to you and your dad. Your mom had gone inside to put the suitcases away in the rooms. “Hi Harry!” You said sweetly, pulling him for a quick hug. Harry grinned back to you, “Hey guys, happy you can make it.” Your dad nodded to his statement, smiling. But looking back at Tom, you could see he was not having it.

“I’m not happy cow-girl came along.” Tom grumbled out, taking a long sip of his beer. You rolled your eyes at the nickname as both your dad and Harry started laughing, “When are you guys getting together?” Your dad questioned teasingly and the both of you grimaced at the thought. When Tom glared over at you again, making Harry punch the side of his arm mouthing, “Not now.”

The four of you walked inside while Tom continued to glare at you. Harry frowned at Tom’s obvious rudeness again, while you could practically feel the holes burning through your head. You stopped thinking about that for a second, as you looked around the entrance of the summer house with amazement. It was completely beautiful. The house was open concept, a beautiful big living room, a dining room off to the side, and the kitchen had a large island.

Tom scoffed at your awe, “Already impressed? Wonder what type of boys you take home.” Your dad acted like he didn’t hear that, just glanced back to the three of you with raised eyebrows before heading off to greet Tom’s dad. You jeered back to Tom instantly, “What? You take home spoiled girls? That’s your thing, huh?” Harry coughed out a giggle between the two of you as he walked into the kitchen, slicing a piece of the cake that his mom made earlier.

He offered some to you, which you declined politely, since you weren’t in the mood to stick around Tom any longer. It was like a pissing contest between the two of you, trying to reach the farthest point to anger each other. “At least I can actually take them home and introduce them to the family.” Tom shot back, making you laugh sarcastically.

“Like your family wants to meet the bratty girls you bring home on the weekends.” You retorted, glancing back to Harry as he took a bite of his slice with a slow nod at your statement. You grinned in victory as Tom scoffed at his brother, slapping the side of his arm annoyed.

Your smugness didn’t last too long though, “I’m heading upstairs, see you later Harry.” You said, looking down at your phone with a grin at the message that popped up. It was one of your friends, sending you another funny video she found online. “Can’t even look at him when you’re speaking? Who’s the fucking brat now?” Tom spoke up, making you scoff at him, rolling your eyes.

It was always like he had to have the last word. You ignored the two boys hollering at each other and you, as you walked up the stairs to the bedroom your suitcase was in. You laid back on the bed with a sigh, glancing around at the mirrors on the wall. It was sort of creepy to you, seeing so many mirrors hung up in a room, but you shrugged it off when you stood back up, starting to unpack some of your clothes. You took your bathing suit out, quickly changing into it so you could go swimming down at the beach. When you looked down there, it seemed like no one was out, and it was peaceful.

You frowned again, realizing it would be anything but peaceful with Tom there.

Down at the beach, you quickly ran into the water, not caring about anyone watching you as you splashed your way in. It was so relaxing to float in the water with the sound of the waves. The sun was bright too, but not the type to make you squint your eyes at. Harry laughed, following you in as you both started splashing water at each other. “Ow! My eyes!” You yelped out as the salty water stung, making Harry stop for a moment.

You giggled quietly as he came closer concerned. Tom watched from the shore with a frown, seeing you clutch your face in pain, and debated if he should go in to check on you. Even though the two of you were far from friends, he still felt a little sting of worry when you didn’t let go of your face, and it made Harry panic.

Tom’s worry reminded him of the time you two met, when he accidently smacked sand in your eyes. He remembered how angry and upset you were, officially declaring him your “enemy” as a six-year-old. He really didn’t want to hurt you, but he just wanted to impress you with cool sand tricks. He saw you playing with toys he wanted to play with, and thought you looked cool, and as he introduced himself, and flicked sand up into the air, it just landed straight in your eyes. You had to go to urgent care when you opened your eyes, making everyone at the park gasp. He felt horrible, but you did say he was your “enemy”, so he felt like he didn’t even have to apologize.

When Harry got to you, spinning you around to face him, your hands were still on your face and you laughed loudly, scaring Harry as you pushed him down into the water. Tom scoffed at your actions and himself, for even being worried about you. “Harry! Next time you have to make sure to splash her eyes!” Tom called out, making you irritated. You glanced back to Harry as he laughed at his brother’s joke.

“Why’s your brother such a dick?” You questioned seriously and quietly to Harry. Tom took a seat back on the chair, putting his sunglasses back on with a sigh. “I don’t know why either of you act like that. If you guys got along, you’d be great together, as friends or…” Harry trailed off seeing your glower at him.

“Not you too!” You groaned out, walking back to shore to dry off. It was already dinner time even though the sun was still out, and you could see back through the windows of the summer house, as both yours and Tom’s family pilled to the front entrance, dressed formally. You dried off quickly with your towel, and threw it back on Tom, making him gasp out of his sleepy-sun rest. “Cow-girl.” Tom bit at you, making you roll your eyes.

“Poop-boy, our families are leaving.” You responded, using his nickname. Tom sighed at it, not bothering to comment as Harry made his way to you both. He stood between the two of you as you all walked back to the house. “You’re going Harry?” You asked, confused as he began to walk faster, or even speed walk. He grinned back to you two, “Yeah! You aren’t?” His question hit both you and Tom.

At the same time, you responded, “Not feeling like it.” While Tom replied, “Nah, too early for me.” The both of you looked at each other with a groan, as Harry laughed. He could already tell that the two of you were going to get on each other’s nerves when everyone else leaves for hours. Harry quickly ran off inside, once the three of you reached the entrance, running into the families.

You glanced to everyone, explaining, “I’m just not really wanting dinner right now. Might go lay down.” Your mom nodded back to you, “Oh bummer! Maybe tomorrow night you can come.” All the parents agreed as Harry sprinted downstairs, stumbling in an outfit now, making everyone laugh. Tom slapped his brother’s shoulder playfully, “Can’t believe you’re leaving me here with that thing.” His voice stung out.

“That thing” was a vicious and horrible comment about you. You usually dealt with cow-girl just fine but when he referred to you like that, it made you upset. His comment quieted everyone down from the laughter and chatter, and they quickly said their goodbyes and left. When your family never spoke up for you in front of everyone here, from Tom’s mean attitude to you, it hurt as well. But it was because they never understood that even though it could’ve just been a joke, it still stung.

Tom sighed out when they left, and gazed back to you, annoyed. He was still thinking about what you and Harry did in the water and it just irritated him that you had the nerve to act like Harry hurt your eyes. You shifted on your feet for a second, looking back to him and shrugged, not wanting to deal with his rude behavior. You walked over to the kitchen and got yourself a glass of water.

Your phone beeped, and it was your friend again with another funny video, and you laughed at the thumbnail on it. Tom strolled over to the kitchen and leaned up against the pantry, “Is that your boyfriend or something?” He asked, absentmindedly playing with his fingers. The way you would smile at your phone was starting to annoy him.

“Uh, no? Why?” You questioned back, facing him. Tom rolled his eyes, “Oh yeah, I should’ve known.” Your irritated sigh came out at his words, and you just weren’t in the mood to argue, so you dropped it. Another beep on your phone brought your attention back, and you laughed loudly at it. It was a picture Harry sent of him, clutching his seat belt funnily.

“What is it now?” Tom asked, pushing himself off the pantry door and glancing over your shoulder at the picture. He chuckled at Harry’s antics, but your tensed up by how close he was. This was the first-time you guys laughed together, at the same thing, in so long. His breath was hitting your neck as he stood behind you looking at the phone. You felt your cheeks burn at it, knowing your neck was sensitive. Tom stayed a second longer than necessary, only stepping back when you glanced back to him.

The two of you stood in silence for a few moments, before Tom cleared his throat, “Poop-boy is a stupid nickname, by the way.” You laughed at that, fully turning around after setting your phone down. “Yeah, so is cow-girl.” Another awkward silence ensured after that, and you sighed at it, glancing back to the cake with interest.

Tom got out two plates, seeing you eye the cake and set it on the island, to fix both of you a slice. “So, have you seen my recent movie?” You frowned at that, sure you have, and you liked it, but you didn’t want him to know that. Even though the two of you were having a rare friendly interaction, it didn’t change the fact he was an asshole to you most of the time. “No, I don’t watch any of them.” You responded, making Tom scoff.

His family and yours have been friends for so long, and it bothered him, that not once did you watch any of the work he did. And when you continued, it only pissed him off further, “Acting is a talentless job, there’s no value in it.” Sure, you realized you should’ve stopped but seeing him angrily clench his fists together after pushing a plate with a slice of cake to you. Tom breathed in, trying to calm down before he did something stupid, like blow up on you again.

“And besides, don’t you only do minor roles? Seems irrelevant.” You pushed, trying to hide your smirk as Tom banged his fists into the counter. “Minor roles? Are you kidding me? That’s my life’s work! You could have just said no!” Tom exclaimed back, in disbelief and anger at you. You shrugged your shoulders at him. You did actually like his movies, and his roles but if you told him, it would only boost his cocky attitude up.

“Do you even know what I do for a living?” You questioned back, making Tom pause. He didn’t know anything about your work. You never said anything about it, at all and it made Tom hesitantly shake his head, “No.” You laughed in disbelief at that, “You don’t have the right to bitch at me then.” You didn’t want him to know about your job, seeing as he would only criticize you more.

Tom stepped forward to you again, “Excuse me? Who’s the fucking bitch here? I know it’s not me.” His voice came out in a sneer and you frowned at it. You didn’t say anything, just picked at the slice he gave you with the fork. “Say it again for me, bitch.” Tom spat out, grabbing your wrist harshly.

“Fucking hell Tom! I’m sorry!” You yelped back, trying to tug your hand away from his but he pulled you in closer to him, making you drop the fork on the floor. You gazed back up to Tom as he stared at you, realizing he shouldn’t have grabbed you like that. He let go of your hands with hesitation, but you stayed in place, standing almost a breath away from him. “Fine, fuck, I’m sorry too.” He mumbled, looking down at you, with his face softening just a little.

You stayed still as silence burned through the two of you, as Tom’s face started going red. You couldn’t tell if it was from anger or something else. You felt a buzzing run through you as the two of you made eye contact, and you couldn’t help but slip your gaze down to his lips slowly. He stood still, gazing at you as you slowly moved your eyes back to his and blushed.

He burned too, just thinking about what your look at his lips could mean. You broke out of the stance, bending down to pick the fork up with a sigh and you stood back up as Tom stayed in place, looking at you. With a teasing attitude, you placed the fork back onto the counter, and swiped your finger over the top of the cake, collecting the frosting.

You gazed back to him with a smirk, stepping back closer to him, as you placed the finger in your mouth, swirling your tongue over the frosting. You closed your eyes, memorizing the flavor as he quietly gasped at you. When you slightly moaned at the taste, Tom finally reached out, snapping your finger out of your mouth, and pulling you to his body, with no distance.

You glanced to him in surprise as he leaned down, and then oh, fuck. You realized what was happening. Tom slammed his lips to yours with a grunt, and you took a second to process it, before kissing back twice as harshly. He pushed you back against the counter, taking his lips off yours for a moment, and he glanced back up to your eyes, “This okay?” He questioned, and you quickly responded a breathy, “Yeah, fuck.”

He pushed into you, trapping you between his arms, with your back against the counter. His lips pushed onto yours again and you opened your mouth instantly, making Tom groan lightly as he pushed his tongue through your lips. His lips were softer than you expected, and the way his tongue swirled and curled, you were stunned by his expert techniques. But you quickly pushed that thought away, as you pushed your tongue onto his, fighting for dominance.

It didn’t work out though, as he pulled away from you again, and muttered out, “Up.” You quickly hopped, and he picked you up, pushing you on top of the counter Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him in closer to you, and the two of you moaned at the feeling. You started to feel a wetness pull in your bathing suit, which wasn’t from the sea. Tom pulled away again, gasping for breath as he tugged your top piece, trying to take it off.

You reached behind you, tugging the top apart, and letting it drop in front of the two of you as Tom gasped, leaning down and capturing a nipple in his mouth. You moaned out as he licked and bit down, in a repeating motion, and you felt yourself getting even more aroused when you looked down to see Tom’s erection.

His cock twitched over and over again from the two of you, and he couldn’t help but think, how fucking hot this was. In all the ways he ever thought of you as a bitch or just “cow-girl”, he didn’t ever expect for you to feel so good under him. And the sounds you were making just made him want you more. “Fuck, why didn’t we do this sooner?” He groaned out, reaching up to kiss you again.

You moaned into his mouth with a shrug. It didn’t really matter to you, all you wanted to do was this, now and in the moment. Tom sighed into the kiss, as you tugged him closer again with your legs. You swirled your tongue onto his lip, and you pushed your hand through his hair, tugging at it. He groaned again and you bit down onto his bottom lip, making him open up again. The sloppy kissing between the two of you started to cause a dribble of shared saliva down your body.

You pulled away for breath again, and Tom quickly tugged his swim trunks down, revealing his throbbing cock to you. He looked back at you, suddenly more aware and spoke up, “Do you want to do this?” his voice came out in shallow breaths, and you quickly responded, “Yes, please.” Tom groaned at your begging, and tugged down your swim bottoms, making you gasp in excitement.

Tom breathed in deeply at the site of you glimmering wet. He couldn’t stop himself as he dived down and kissed your core. You gasped out again, and he started licking, and sucking. It was amazing to him, he couldn’t stop once he started, when hearing your moans and the taste. You moaned loudly, and squeezed your legs around his head, while pushing your hands back into his hair, tugging and sliding your fingers through it.

The pulsing intensified as he sucked straight onto your clit, and you yelped out, “Tom, please!” He pulled away, feeling another twitch rush through his cock. He breathed in unsteadily, “What do you want, babe?” You furrowed your eyebrows at the nickname but retorted, “Tom, please just fuck me.”

He sighed out, feeling himself flush more as he stood back up, and pulled you closer to his hips. In a slow movement, he pushed himself in with a loud groan. “Oh fuck!” He groaned out and you moaned as well, feeling the fullness in you. Tom shuddered when he bottomed out, “Fuck, how are you so fucking tight?” You groaned when he moved back and slammed into you again.

“Fuck Tom!” You moaned out, as he started to pace himself. Both of you were breathing loud and unevenly, moaning out when he would sink in again. You wrapped your legs around him, to pull him in even more making him tremble. Tom suddenly bent his legs, and scooped you up, you held onto him as he carried you back to the pantry door, slamming back into you. You gasped out at the different position and he took the chance to kiss you deeply, groaning into the kiss.

He continued to hold you up against the door as you moaned into the kiss. You pushed your head away from his, pulling his head back with your hand and leaning down and kissing his neck sloppily. He groaned again, pushing one hand down to your clit and rubbing it suddenly. You gasped at the sensations, feeling like you were nearing an orgasm. As if Tom could feel it as well, he started rubbing harder onto your clit and with a loud gasp and moan, “Tom- I’m fuck, I’m coming.”

“Come for me.” He grunted out, and in an instant, you felt like bliss. You came hard and fast, moaning out his name loudly, as Tom neared his end too. He moved himself out of you as he came hard, groaning loudly. His legs felt like jelly, and you quickly dropped your legs, standing up while trembling and breathing heavily. “Holy shit.” You whispered out, sinking to the ground of the kitchen with Tom following along.

You sat with each other for a few minutes, trying to catch your breath. “That was fucking good, poop-boy. Didn’t know you had that much stamina.” You laughed out, making Tom shake his head at you. But this time he was smiling too, “Fuck you, cow-girl.” The both of you looked at each other silently for a moment before bursting out laughing together.

It was so strange to be here with him, laughing with him. And especially fucking him. That felt good though, but you just hoped it wouldn’t bite you in the ass. You glanced out the window, noticing it was already nighttime, and that the sunset was already gone. You pushed yourself up with a groan, as Tom stayed on the floor still. “I’m going to take a shower.” You murmured to him, making him gaze up to you.

“I can join if you want?” Tom responded instantly making you giggle again. The sex glow was visible on both of you, and especially his face, with his doped-out smile. You blushed again looking at it, finding it attractive. “No, I think they’ll be back soon.” You whispered, smiling back to him.

But where did all of this leave you two?

You thought about it for a long time in the shower, maybe over an hour. It wasn’t like the two of you could just go back to hating each other like nothing. That would hurt too much, for the both of you. You could see that Tom didn’t want to go back either, by the way you guys interacted after the sex. And it was also fucking good, one of the best in a long time and you assumed so for him too. After all these years, and you finally fucked some of the tension out? Yeah, it was great. But you guys couldn’t possibly just start a relationship like that.

You stepped out of the shower after making sure you got all the mess off your body, hoping to talk to Tom about everything. Was it going to be a one-time thing? You anticipated not. You quickly got dressed, seeing the marks Tom made around the one nipple and laughing at it. It was already bruised, which surprised you.

After getting your pajamas on, you headed downstairs again, seeing that Tom cleaned up the kitchen, but was still in his swim-trunks. “Hey,” You greeted quietly and almost shyly, his head instantly looked up to you and he smiled brightly.

Oh, fuck. That was so fucking cute and hot. He walked towards you with the same sex-doped grin you had. The front door opened, but the two of you were too entrapped in each other to notice, as Tom leaned down to kiss you again. You instantly wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, smiling into the kiss. And that was when you heard the screaming. The two of you bounced away from each other as Harry hollered, “Finally!”

Your dad had shouted, “When’s the wedding?!” And the rest of them too shocked to say anything. You and Tom glanced at each other awkwardly, not expecting them at all. The stare the two of you shared together was an invisible conversation, where you agreed to deny everything.

“What are you talking about?” You questioned back, acting baffled as Tom started, “Yeah, you guys are drunk…”. Harry snorted at your defense, “I don’t care, just as long as you guys didn’t do it in my room here.”

Tom shook his head at that laughing, as you raised your eyebrows back to Harry. He came between you and Tom again and pulled you into a group hug. “If I’m not the best man, fucking make me the bride’s maid of honor.” His voice came out in a hushed tone, and the three of you fell into laughter. - tags: @lozzypoz321 taglist is open!

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wjbsart · 3 years ago

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A complete, very long list of all GBoard-combinable emojis because I can't find one anywhere.

Ok so for those who haven't seen my stuff (or have only seen my Bionicle posts), I sometimes emoji mashup redraws, with the recent fourth one using GBoard-based fusions. Frustratingly, there's no actual list of fusion-compatible emojis, so I'll attempt to compile them, in a list below the "Read More" thing:

Green/▢ = compatible with fusion Blue/△ = only works with certain emojis Red/◯ = not compatible with fusion

Also, since other people's terms for specific emojis might not match up with mine, I recommend using CTRL+F and then doing this to find the specific emoji you're looking for. This list is in the order presented in GBoard's Emoji menu. Some of them will be generic unicode symbols, I don't know how to change that, sorry for the inconvenience. Also, I won't aknowledge multi-category Emoji.

Smileys and Emoticons

😀Open-mouthed smile▢

😃Wide-eyed smile▢

😄Closed-eyed smile▢

😁Closed-eyed grin▢

😆Laughing▢

😅Sweating smile▢

😂Cry-laughing▢

🤣Cry-ROFLing▢

😭Crying▢

😗Kissing▢

😙Kissing, closed eyes▢

😚Kissing, blushing▢

😘Kissing, winking w/ heart▢

🥰Surrounded by hearts▢

😍Heart-eyes▢

🤩Star-eyes▢

🥳Noisemaker and party-hat▢

🤗Hugging▢

🙃Upside-down▢

🙂Smile▢

☺Blushing, smiling▢

😊Blushing▢

😏Looking off to the side▢

😌Relieved▢

😉Winking▢

🤭Hand over mouth▢

😶Nightmare fuel Mouthless▢

😐Neutral▢

😑-_-▢

😔Pensive▢

😋Licking lips▢

😛Tongue out▢

😝Tongue out, eyes closed▢

😜Tongue out, winking▢

🤪Tongue out, wide-eyed▢

🤔Hmmm▢

🤨Suspicious▢

🧐Monocle▢

🙄Rolling eyes▢

😒Unamused▢

😤Snorting▢

😠Angry▢

😡Angry, red▢

🤬Swearing▢

☹Frown▢

🙁Frown but less▢

😕Confused▢

😟Distraught▢

🥺Pleading▢

😳AWOOGA Flushed▢

😬Yikes▢

🤐Zip▢

🤫Shushing▢

😰Distraught, sweating▢

😧Distraught, shocked▢

😦Distraught, neutral▢

😮Open mouth▢

😯Open mouth, surprised▢

😲Shocked▢

😱Horrified▢

🤯Your head asplode Mind blown▢

😢Crying, single tear▢

😥Crying, less sad▢

😓Sweating▢

😞Dissapointed▢

😖Pained▢

😣Persevering▢

😩Weary▢

😫Tired▢

🤤Drooling▢

😴Sleeping▢

😪Sleeping but different?▢

🌛Left-facing moon▢

🌜Right-facing moon▢

🌚New moon face◯

🌝Full moon face◯

🌞The sun▢

🤢Queasy▢

🤮Vomiting▢

🤧Sneezing▢

🤒Unwell▢

🤕Bandaged▢

🥴Drunk▢

😵Dizzy▢

🥵Hot▢

🥶Cold▢

😷Masked up▢

😇Angel▢

🤠yee haw▢

🤑Money-tongue▢

😎Cool▢

🤓Nerd▢

🤥Lying▢

🤡Clown▢

👻Ghost▢

💩Poop▢

👽Ayy lmao Alien▢

🤖Robot▢

🎃Jack-o-Lantern▢

😈Demon 1▢

👿Demon 2▢

👹Oni◯

👺Tengu◯

☠Skull and crossbones▢

🔥Fire▢

💫Star with trail▢

⭐Star▢

🌟Star with bits▢

✨Stars▢

⚡Lightning◯

💥Explosion◯

💯100△

💢Anime anger symbol◯

💨Steam▢

💦Sweat Droplets▢

💤Zzz▢

🕳Hole▢

🎉Party popper▢

🎊Confetti ball▢

😺😸😹😻😼😽🙀😿😾Literally all the "cat in different emotions" emojis▢

❤🧡💛💚💙💜🖤Literally all the coloured hearts△

♥Heart suit▢

💘Heart with arrow▢

💝Heart with ribbon▢

💖Shiny heart▢

💗Growing heart▢

💓Beating heart▢

💞Swirling hearts▢

💕Two hearts▢

💌Love letter▢

💟Heart in square▢

❣Heart exclamation mark▢

💔Broken heart▢

💋Kiss▢

👥Two silhouettes◯

👤Silhouette◯

🗣Talking silhouette◯

👣Footprints◯

🧠Brain◯

🦠Microbe▢

🦷Tooth◯

🦴Bone◯

💀Skull▢

👀Eyes◯

👁Eye▢

👄Lips◯

👅Tongue◯

👃👂🦶🦵💪👍👎👏🙌👐Every other body part and hand gesture, seriously this isn't even all of them◯

People

Seriously, I don't know why none of the people-category emojis are Fusion-compatible. Let's just move on.◯

Animals and Nature

💐Bunch of flowers▢

🌹Rose▢

🥀Wilted rose◯

🌷Tulip▢

🌺Hibiscus flower◯

🌸Cherry blossom▢

🏵Rosette◯

🌻Sunflower◯

🌼Daisy▢

💮White flower◯

🍂Falling leaves◯

🍁Maple leaf◯

🌾Rice plants◯

🌱Seedling◯

🌿Herb◯

🍃Falling leaves again◯

☘3-leaf clover◯

🍀4-leaf clover◯

🌵Cactus▢

🌴Palm tree◯

🌳Deciduous tree◯

🌲Coniferous tree▢

🏞National park◯

⛰Mountain◯

🌊Wave◯

🌬Wind◯

🌀Tornado symbol◯

🌁Foggy scene◯

🌫Fog▢

🌪Tornado▢

☃Snowman (with snow)▢

⛄Snowman (without snow)▢

❄Snowflake

🏔Mountain with snow◯

🌡Thermometer◯

🌋Volcano◯

🏜Desert◯

🏝Desert island◯

🏖Beach◯

🌅Sunrise/set (water)◯

🌄Sunrise/set (mountains)◯

☀Sun▢

🌤Sun with cloud◯

⛅Sun and cloud◯

🌥Cloud with sun◯

🌦Sun and cloud with rain◯

☁Cloud▢

🌨Snowcloud◯

⛈Stormcloud◯

🌩Thundercloud◯

🌧Raincloud◯

💧Drop◯

☔Umbrella with rain◯

🌈Rainbow▢

✨Sparkles▢

🌙Crescent Moon◯

☄Comet◯

🌠Shooting star▢

🌌Milky Way◯

🌉Bridge◯

🌆City in the evening▢

🌃City at night▢

🌍🌏🌎Earth▢

🌑🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘The moon◯

🙈🙉🙊🐵Monkeys, wise or not▢

🦁Lion face▢

🐯Tiger face◯

🐱Cat face▢

🐶Dog face◯

🐺Wolf face◯

🐻Bear face▢

🐨Koala face▢

🐼Panda face▢

🐹Hamster face◯

🐭Mouse face◯

🐰Rabbit face▢

🦊Fox face◯

🦝Raccoon face◯

🐮Cow face◯

🐷Pig face▢

🐽Pig nose▢

🐗Boar head◯

🦓Zebra head◯

🦄Unicorn head▢

🐴Horse head◯

🐸Frog face◯

🐲Dragon head◯

🦎Lizard◯

🐉Dragon◯

🦖T-Rex◯

🦕Diplodocus◯

🐢Turtle▢

🐊Crocodile◯

🐍Snake◯

🐁Mouse▢

🐀Rat◯

🐇Rabbit▢

🐈Cat▢

🐩Poodle◯

🐕Dog◯

🐅Tiger◯

🐆Leopard◯

🐎Horse◯

🐖Pig▢

🐄Cow◯

🐂Bull◯

🐃Water buffalo◯

🐏Ram◯

🐑Sheep◯

🐐Goat▢

🦌Deer▢

🦙Llama▢

🦘Kangaroo◯

🐘Elephant◯

🦏Rhinoceros◯

🦛Hippopotamus◯

🦒Giraffe◯

🐒Monkey▢

🦍Gorilla◯

🐪🐫Camels◯

🐿Squirrel (why does the squirrel of all things have a Unicode symbol?)◯

🦡Badger◯

🦔Hedgehog▢

🦇Bat▢

🐓Cockerel/rooster◯

🐔Chicken◯

🐣🐥🐤Chicks◯

🐦Bird▢

🦉Owl▢

🦅Eagle◯

🦜Parrot◯

🕊Dove◯

🦢Swan◯

🦚Peacock◯

🦃Turkey◯

🦆Duck◯

🐧Penguin◯

🦈Shark◯

🐬Dolphin◯

🐋🐳Whales◯

🐟Fish▢

🐠Tropical fish◯

🐡Pufferfish◯

🦐Prawn◯

🦞Lobster◯

🦀Crab◯

🦑Squid◯

🐙Octopus▢

🦂Scorpion▢

🕷Spider▢

🕸Spiderweb◯

🐚Shell◯

🐌Snail▢

🐜Ant◯

🦗Grasshopper◯

🦟Mosquito◯

🐝Bee▢

🐞Ladybird◯

🦋Butterfly◯

🐛"Bug" yeah sure ok◯

🐾Pawprints◯

Food and Drink

🍓Strawberry▢

🍒Cherry◯

🍎Red apple◯

🍉Watermelon◯

🍑Peach◯

🍊Orange◯

🥭Mango◯

🍍Pineapple▢

🍌Banana◯

🍋Lemon▢

🍈Melon◯

🍏Green apple◯

🍐Pear◯

🥝Kiwi◯

🍇Grapes◯

🥥Coconut◯

🍅Tomato◯

🌶Chili▢

🍄Mushroom◯

🥕Carrot◯

🍠Sweet potato◯

🌽Corn◯

🥦Broccoli◯

🥒Cucumber◯

🥬Lettuce◯

🥑Avocado▢

🍆Aubergine◯

🥔Potato◯

🌰Nut◯

🥜Peanuts◯

🍞Bread▢

🥐Croissant◯

🥖Baguette▢

🥯Bagel◯

🥞Pancakes◯

🍳Frying pan◯

🥚Egg (somehow)◯

🧀Cheese▢

🥓Bacon◯

🥩Meat◯

🍗Chicken leg◯

🍖Anime meat◯

🍔Burger◯

🌭Hotdog▢

🥪Sandwich◯

🥨Pretzel◯

🍟Chips◯

🍕Pizza◯

🌮Taco◯

🌯Wrap◯

🥙Stuffed flatbread◯

🥘Paella◯

🍝Spaghetti◯

🥫Can◯

🥣Bowl◯

🥗Salad◯

🍲Pot of food◯

🍛Curry◯

🍜Noodles◯

🍣Sushi◯

🍤Fried prawn◯

🥡Takeaway container◯

🍚Cooked rice◯

🍱Bento◯

🥟Dumpling◯

🍢Oden◯

🍙Jelly Donut Rice ball◯

🍘Rice cracker◯

🍥Fishcake◯

🍡Dango◯

🥠Fortune cookie◯

🥮Moon cake◯

🍧Shave ice◯

🍨Ice cream◯

🍦See above◯

🥧Pie◯

🍰Cake slice◯

🍮Custard mate what kinda custard have you been eating, this is clearly a créme caramel◯

🎂Birthday cake▢

🧁Cupcake▢

🍭Lollipop◯

🍬Boiled sweet◯

🍫Chocolate◯

🍩Donut◯

🍪Cookie◯

🍯Honey◯

🧂Salt◯

🍿Popcorn◯

🥤Soft drink◯

🥛Milk◯

🍼Baby bottle◯

🍵Green tea◯

☕Coffee▢

🍺Beer◯

🍻Beers, plural◯

🥂Champagne glasses◯

🍾Champagne◯

🍷Red red wine◯

🥃Whiskey◯

🍸Martini◯

🍹Cocktail◯

��Sake◯

🥢Chopsticks◯

🍴Knife and fork▢

🥄Spoon◯

🔪Kitchen knife◯

🍽Plate▢

Travel and Places

🛑🎡Everything from the stop sign to Ferris wheel◯

🎠Merry-go-round horse▢

🎪🏕Everything from circus tent to campsite◯

🌇City at sunset yes I'm surprised as you are▢

🛤Train tracks◯

🛣Road◯

🗺Map◯

🗾Japan is an island by the sea filled with volcanoes and it's beautifuul!◯

🌐Globe with meridian lines▢

💺Plane seat◯

🧳Luggage◯

Activities and Events

🎈Balloon▢

🎀Bow◯

🎁Present◯

🎇Sparkler◯

🎆Fireworks◯

🧨Dynamite Firecracker◯

🧧Red envelope◯

🎐Wind chime◯

🎏Fish streamers◯

🎎Japanese dolls (that's what the emoji's called, don't @ me with the actual name for them)◯

🎑Moon viewing ceremony◯

🎍Pine decoration◯

🎋Tanabata◯

🎄Christmas tree▢

🎗Ribbon△

🥇🥈🥉🏅🎖Medals◯

🏆Trophy◯

📣Megaphone◯

🥅Goal◯

⚽⚾🥎🏀🏐🏈🏉🎾🏸🥍🏏🏑🏒SPORTS◯

🥌Curling stone◯

🛷Rosebud Sled◯

🎿Ski◯

⛸Skate◯

⛳Golf-hole◯

🎯Target◯

🏹Bow◯

🥏Frisbee◯

🎣Fishing rod▢

🎽Running shirt◯

🥋Martial arts uniform◯

🥊Boxing glove◯

🎱8-ball◯

🏓Ping-pong◯

🎳Bowling◯

♟Chess◯

🧩Puzzle piece◯

🎮Controller◯

🕹Joystick◯

👾Videogame alien◯

🔫Gun◯

🎲Dice◯

🎰Slot machine◯

🎴Flower playing card◯

🀄Mahjong tile◯

🃏Joker◯

🎩Top hat◯

📷📸Camera◯

🖼Painting◯

🖌Paintbrush◯

🖍Crayon◯

🧵String◯

🧶Wool◯

🎼🎵🎶Music▢

🎷🎺🎸🎻🥁Instruments◯

🎤Mic◯

🎧Headphones▢

🎚🎛🎙📻Assorted audio stuff◯

📺TV◯

📼VHS◯

📹Camcorder◯

📽Projector◯

🎥Film camera◯

🎞Film◯

🎬Clapperboard◯

🎭Comedy and tragedy masks◯

🎫🎟Tickets◯

Objects

📱🧻Everything from smartphone to toilet roll◯

🧸Teddy bear▢

🧷🧢Everything from safety pin to baseball cap◯

👑Crown▢

🎒💍Everything from backpack to ring◯

💎Diamond▢

💄👓Everything from lipstick to glasses◯

🕶Sunglasses▢

🥽📁Everything from goggles to folder◯

🕶Newspaper▢

🗞🔎Everything from rolled-up newspaper to right-pointing magnifying glass◯

🔮Crystal ball▢

🧿🔓Everything from Nazar amulet to open lock◯

Symbols

There are no compatible non-repeated Emoji here.◯

Flags

Aaaaand none here either.◯

Feel free to let me know if I got anything wrong.

#emoji #emoji mashup #cursed emoji

23 notes · View notes

cozy-possum · 3 years ago

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Me rewatching trolls 2 mean y’all’re getting my dumb thoughts about it

This movie has such wonderful set design and texture contrast; just imagine how much more wonderful it could have been if the trolls were needle felted and the lands were made in a stop motion style in the real world instead of via a computer

The contrast in textures and land/home visuals for the different trolls just gives me good shivers

How long ago did the Elder’s take the strings away?

How long were the Pop Trolls imprisoned in with the Bergens? I fell like that should have been touched on? Or is this an AU where that never happened?

I would love to see more scrapbook exposition; I kinda wish the series was done in that style; it would have been so cute!

Why is there no Mr. Dinkles plushie with a squeaker; it should have happened

What’s the timeline for Barb’s plan anyways? Was she thinking about this for years? Was it her dad’s idea, is she just continuing his legacy?

So the techno trolls don’t actually live underwater right? Since Barb has no trouble invading them without like troll scuba gear; and they seem to be able to survive on land like the other trolls

The techno trolls can fly?? Or at least hover??

Does Barb’s dad have serious memory issues? Like no wonder Barb wants to unite everyone under Rock if her dad is slowly forgetting everything

Is penny whistle supposed to be a child??? Like a child who’s seen the horrors of genocide? War?

Are the classical music trolls based more on the OG troll design, since they have the triangle hair and gemstone bellybutton?

Is pennywhistle the only sentient instrument? Or just the only one that didn’t get taken?

Do like smaller/lesser known genre trolls exist in their own lands?(since the bounty hunter trolls)Like how the main genres have massive plots; or do they live within the boundries of a main genre similar to a county or state within a country? I know it’s implied Barb took their land as well; but surely the map would have shown those divisions? Or is it all just in the ‘uncharted land’ to the west of the regular map?

Okay but now I want a short/mini series about all the bounty hunter groups making a living being musical bounty hunters??

Why are the yodeler’s so good at being bounty hunters??? they have a reputation; how did that happen???

So if all trolls reproduce by hair (assumed asexual reproduction with the possibility for sexual/combined from two genetic sources) and then hatch an egg; could the different genre’s of trolls come together to have ‘mixed genre’ kids?? Like a techno and country toll coming together to make a tiny centaur mermaid?? Would the baby be a mix of colour palettes of the two parents?

What on earth are those cow creatures in lonesome flats?? Actually I want more info on the fauna in the troll world

Why are the burgers sentient????? (I’m assuming it’s just song/narration)

How many things can Trolls fit in their hair??

The entire Mr. Dinkles and monty python-esque candy heaven sequence was gold

Wait does this mean there was a Mr. Dinkles species Jesus??? Or; Mr. Dinkles is jesus/the prince to his heaven/god/king since he was being welcomed home??

Trolls have a coffee/coffee equivilent??

Wait does Cooper poop cake???

So Cooper was raised as a Pop troll; did he ever have like ‘funk’ habits?? Did some of the older pop trolls who knew of the other trolls; assuming Poppy’s Dad isn’t the only one, try to explain as best they could, or did they just let him do whatever and call it pop?

Are there bipedal and quadripedal versions of all trolls; or is that just a funk kingdom thing?

Do you think the other trolls knew about the Bergens; and because of what the pop trolls did they decided not to help them?

I do love the subversion of Branch confessing to Poppy without anyone ruining it

Why is it that the lyre is the only one that can keep the string separate? Did the other trolls make their instruments to hold the string they had?

How did Barb change into that jumpsuit so fast??

When everything went gray; do you think when Branch woke up, he thought it was like how he was in the first movie?

Why do Poppy and Barb get fun rainbow outfits but Cooper and Prince D don’t since they’re all the ‘next gen royalty’ what about delta dawn trollzart, and trollex? Do they have heirs to the throne?

Do the other trolls (species??Music styles??Genres??) Have hair power/pinky promise intensity; or something equivalent??

I don’t know what I love more; Barb’s rainbow mohawk; or poppy’s crochet crop top, pants and furry trench vest combo

The credits are so good; please watch them for all the trolls interactions

You’re telling me there were never past trolls who were into genre mashups?

I want a group of shorts where each genre tries to take over and another member of another royal family has to stop them; basically I just wanna see the other trolls turned into various *insert genre* zombies

Support My Writing?

#trolls #trolls world tour #trolls 2 #stattic #man these are fun to do #anyone wanna see me do another one?#its kinda a joke #but also if anyone has any fun movie recs

4 notes · View notes

snowdice · 4 years ago

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A Twist of Fate {Part 1} (Everything’s Fine Universe) [Dice Roll 13]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Remus & Janus & Patton

Characters: Janus, Patton, Remus

Summary: It wasn’t unheard of for people to gain soulmarks later in life, but it was quite rare. Usually fate was set in stone. Yet, when one’s fated death was prevented, fate had to make some adjustments.

As he fell, Patton may have felt a strange prickling feeling across his skin. He however, was not paying attention to that, far too distracted and confused. All he knew was that by the time he hit the ground, both of his hands were covered with marks. Later when he went home he’d notice even more in other places, but the ones he noticed when he hit the ground were the obvious ones on his hands.

Then, there was Janus. Janus had only one soulmark on his body. At least. He had only one soulmark that hadn’t been burnt off years ago. When he landed on top of Patton, he did not notice the marks that suddenly appeared on his arms and face. Patton did, however, notice two little designs appear on him: one along the side of his nose and the other right below the scaring on the left side of his face. The second was already colored in by the time they hit the ground.

Universe: Soulmate AU and Superhero AU

Genre: The Dice Roll said fluff and it is... but... it’s more fluff and angst, hurt/comfort-ish

Notes: Child abuse, homelessness, malnutrition, acid burns, platonic soulmates

“Found a 20-dollar bill!” Remus called. He was already on his belly halfway under a bush before Janus could move to stop him. Janus sighed. He guessed he was washing the boy’s clothes today. Again. Of course, $20 was probably worth the inconvenience. The nine-year-old wiggled and shimmied under the bush. “Got it!” he said.

“Good job,” Janus complimented. “Now come back out.”

“Now I’m stuck!” Remus informed him happily, giving a little wiggle.

“Why?” Janus groaned. He knelt down next to the still quite squirmy boy. “Stop kicking Remus,” he ordered. His feet stilled and Janus grabbed him by the ankles before yanking on him.

“Ouch!” Remus said, but Janus knew the difference between actually in pain Remus and being a whiny baby Remus and so he kept pulling.

“You.” He punctuated each word with a yank on his legs. “Knew. What. Would. Happen. When. You. Went. Under. There.”

Finally, on the last pull, Remus popped out of the bush. Janus fell backwards onto his butt. “Yeah, but I also knew you’d get me out and fall on your butt!” Remus said while sticking his tongue out.

Janus glared at the sky. “Why are you always such a gremlin?”

Remus giggled and climbed on top of Janus. He slapped the $20 bill down on his chest.

“The person who lost it was supposed to get bread and milk from the store for their dad,” Remus informed him. “When he lost it and couldn’t get the food, his dad said that he was a liar and probably spent it on something stupid. Then his dad hit him in the face and kicked him in the ribs.”

“I see,” Janus said evenly while internally wincing. It wasn’t the worst information to come pouring out of Remus’s mouth, but still. Ouch. He stroked the hair out of Remus’s face and got a gap-toothed smile in return. “Well, we’ll get some good use out of that money, huh?”

“Yeah!” Remus said. “We could get a cake! A whole cake!”

“I don’t know if a whole cake is the best financial decision,” Janus pointed out and got a wobbly lip in return. “But,” he smiled a bit, “we can buy a frosted cookie from the bakery when we get bread.”

“Yayyayyayyayyay!”

Janus gently pushed Remus off of him and he went rolling in a pile of giggles. “Come on Re,” he said, holding out a hand for him. Remus took it and swung their hands together between them. They walked towards the park entrance hand in hand.

Remus paused a couple of feet before the street. “Change now,” he instructed.

Janus did immediately. He stretched his body up about a foot and pulled it out a bit. He erased the burn marks littering the left side of his face and replaced them with a line of unmarred soulmarks framing the apple of his cheek. He carved a couple of age lines into his hands and around his eyes as well as a few more soulmarks on his wrist and hand. Remus adjusted his grip on the now slightly bigger hand without missing a step. Just as Janus finished the shift, a woman with a baby stroller turned the corner. Janus flashed her a smile and she continued past without a second glance.

He and Remus continued to walk until they were on the sidewalk outside of the park. Janus looked to Remus who was squinting into the air. A few seconds later, he pointed to the right. “Bad,” he said. Janus nodded and led him to the left.

The shift was already starting to put a strain on Janus, but he couldn’t let it go while on the street. Usually he could last longer, but he hadn’t gotten much to eat in the last week and had felt a bit dizzy even before forcing his body not only to shift, but to support a larger than natural form. He’d just have to deal. Remus would tell him if he was in danger of passing out anyway, and soon they’d be able to get some real food with the money they’d found today. There was $6.78 in addition to the $20 they’d just found, so they’d be set for a little while if they played their cards right.

Luckily, the bakery was only a couple of blocks from the park and they’d be able to buy some day-old bread for cheap to eat from there as well as the promised cookie to split.

Remus ripped himself away from Janus when they were a couple of feet from the bakery and slammed his little body through the door. He was up at the counter before Janus could get through the door.

“Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!” he was saying, jumping up and down at the cash register.

Luckily the man just seemed amused rather than annoyed by Remus’s antics. “Hello Jimmy,” he said kindly.

“Hi!” Remus said one more time. “I get a cookie today!”

“Do you?” the man asked, amused.

“He does,” Janus confirmed. “He’s been impressively well behaved for once in his life.” Remus titled his head all the way back to stick his tongue out at him.

The man smiled at them softly. He’d never introduced himself in the time that Remus and Janus had been coming here, but he did have a nametag that read ‘Patton.’ Patton was here most days of the week. It was always him, a teenage girl, or the older woman who owned the place working. Janus and Remus agreed that he was the best option. He was always nice and never seemed to be annoyed with Remus (a feat even Janus sometimes struggled with). He’d even snuck them extra food sometimes which was always a nice surprise. “What’ll it be today?” he asked with a smile.

“Two loafs of day-old bread and whatever cookie Jimmy wants,” Janus said.

Patton nodded with a warm smile and moved to get their order. He was always so unflinchingly nice. They’d seen him interact with all sorts of people in the 6 months they’d lived in this neighborhood, and he was always kind to everyone almost… fatherly. Which was why his hands were always a surprise whenever Janus caught sight of them.

It was odd to see someone like him with unmarked hands. Janus’s own hands were unmarked (at least when he wasn’t shifted), but that made sense. Janus didn’t think he’d make a very good parent if he ever even had the opportunity. The one on his wrist for Remus was probably the closest he’d ever get and that was edging more into sibling territory. Yet, by the way Patton looked at Remus and all other children that came into the bakery (at least the children who looked like children), one would expect his hands to be riddled with marks. Chest unmarked? Sure, he just didn’t want to be all gross and kissy with someone. Face unmarked? His parents sucked or weren’t around like Remus’s. Arms? No siblings or sibling like relationships. But, hands? That was a surprise, at least for Patton. He just seemed like… someone who would want to be someone’s dad. He didn’t even have any anywhere near his hands from what Janus had observed. He had two already black ones on his cheeks, probably from his parents, and he almost had to have some friendship ones on his back, but Janus had yet to catch sight of any others.

“Which cookie do you want?” Patton asked.

“Ooo ooo, um,” Remus said. “Should I get the one with a smiley face or the one with the flowers?” he asked.

“Hmm,” Patton contemplated. “How about this. If you could pick any design to be on a cookie, what would it be?”

“Moggie!” Remus said without question. “Moggie’s my favorite!”

“Well, I was decorating a cake a bit ago and I have a bunch of different colored frosting already out and in piping bags so why don’t I go make you one with Moggie-Man on it?”

Remus gasped. “Really?!”

“Of course!” Patton said, eyes fond on an enthusiastic Remus. “Anything for one of my best customers.”

They were hardly his best customers. They consistently only bought the marked down items like the day-old bread that was only a dollar a loaf. Yet, Janus wasn’t going to argue when Remus was so incredibly excited, even if hand frosting a cookie would take longer and Janus was already a bit unsteady on his feet. Instead of ruining the fun, he sat down at one of the closer tables and took out the heal of the bread loaf. He technically hadn’t paid for it yet, but it’d be fine. He shoved it in his mouth, willing his body to accept the offering of carbs and remain upright.

Remus was bouncing up and down while squeaking as Patton went into the back and returned a moment later with bags of purple, black, and grey icing. Janus rolled his eyes even as he smiled through his mouthful of bread.

“Did you know Moggie once broke his collar bone fighting Speed Bullet when he was only 19?!” Remus gushed. “It was so cool! Speed Bullet was moving too fast and Moggie couldn’t teleport in time and he got thrown off a barn. He would have broken his neck and died if he hadn’t ended up in a big pile of hay.”

“O-oh,” Patton replied.

“The hay had cow poop in it!”

“How do you know he was 19?” Patton asked.

“Uh…” Remus said. The ‘oops’ was clear in his eyes, but he recovered easily. “I invented that part. I make things up sometimes.”

“Ah, well, that’s very creative,” Patton said as he finished up the cookie. He handed it over the counter to Remus who took it with a wide grin and proudly showed Janus the cartoon version of the superhero on it. It was really good, especially considering it was done in icing.

“Thank you,” Janus said, standing up and walking to the counter.

“Yes! Thank you, Mister Bakery Guy!”

“It was no trouble,” Patton replied. He was watching Remus with a grin.

Janus coughed, and he looked back up.

“Oh right!” he said. “$4.52.”

Janus handed over 3 of the dollar-bills they’d gotten earlier and counted out the rest in change.

“Thanks!” Patton said, taking the money. “Have a good day you two.”

“Bye,” said Janus. He shooed Remus out of the door and across the street into an alley. “Anything bad?” he asked when they got there. Remus looked up from his cookie for a moment and thought. He shook his head. Janus sighed and let himself shrink back to normal with a groan.

“You feel bad,” Remus informed him.

“Thanks for the info,” Janus replied. “Very helpful.”

Remus frowned at him and offered the cookie. “You can bite off Moggie’s head,” he offered.

Janus chuckled. “You go ahead and do that. I’ll eat his clavicle.”

“Good choice!” Remus said before taking a bite of the icing superhero’s head. When he offered the cookie to Janus again, Janus took a bite. Then, Remus took another bite. They finished the cookie off in that way.

“Okay,” Janus said. “We have about an hour to get groceries before the shop down the block closes, and then we’ll go home.” Home at the moment was a forgotten about shed in an old community garden a few streets away. Remus said they’d freeze to death in the winter if they tried to stay there, so they’d have to find somewhere else soon. The leaves were just starting to turn though, so they probably had enough time to figure something else out, but they did need to be working on it.

Janus pushed himself to his feet. The bread and half a cookie had helped, and the shifting this time only burnt a little bit. It would be even better once they had something with protein and fat after going to the grocery store. Janus took Remus’s hand again and they made their way to the shop.

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 2

#sanders sides #janus sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #platonic demus #adriana writes #everything's fine universe #child abuse #homelessness #malnutrition #acid burns #soulmate au #superhero au #roll the dice #roll the dice 13 #platonic intruality #platonic moceit #platonic soulmates

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praveen545 · 7 months ago

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holy cow dung cake amazon

Shop the best quality Holy Cow Dung Cakes on Amazon. Experience the divine power and purity of these traditional Indian rituals. Enhance your spiritual practices and create positive energy in your surroundings. Buy now and embrace the ancient wisdom.https://daasoham.com/

#cow dung for pooja #cow dung for agnihotra #cow dung cake maker #dung patties #cow poop cake #cow dung for havan #buy cow dung cake #gir cow dung #cow dung cake on flipkart

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brelione · 4 years ago

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The Goddess Part Two (JJ Maybank x Reader)

Part Three Part One

The next time he saw you was at the petting zoo.He knew you’d be there but for some reason he was still shocked to see you.You hadnt seen him yet,though.It was before opening hours.He was hiding in the lower branches of a tree,watching as you sung to the goats.He couldnt even understand the words you were saying,just the sound of your voice as it hit unbelievably high notes.It was enough to make his heart thump,his chest to tighten and him to almost fall off of the tree branch he had been clinging too.Suddenly you were all that mattered to him.Nothing else existed.Just you.His eyes were almost like cameras,zooming in on you.You were wearing a white sundress that somehow hadnt gotten any dirt or goat poop on it.Your hair was messy and curly from the salt water you swam in all the time,your shiny jewelry glistening in the sunlight.You snapped your fingers,one of the smaller goats had literally jumped on you.

You giggled,holding a flower out to it.The goat got back down and they ran around their hay covered fenced in area.Your house was a good distance away from the area but it was still within his line of vision.Your family was absolutely rich but you werent kooks.You guys willingly chose to live in a shitty house.It looked shitty from the outside but JJ had never been inside.Your father had payed JJ large amounts of money to mow your lawn every tuesday.It didnt need to be mowed.You could just have the goats eat up the excess grass,or the chickens,or the cows.But little did JJ know that you were behind his weekly job.You knew that JJ didnt have a lot of money and shifted between John.B’s house and his own house,spending some nights at the beach.

You wanted JJ to have a good amount of money for anything he might need.Whether it be gas,a coffee,a new shirt,going to the laundromat.You just liked the idea of him being safe and happy all the time.Thats when he had seen you wearing that lovely sweater.You had come out of your house,placing a small jar of home made jam,a paper bag and an energy drink out on your deck before going back inside.JJ had been watching you out of the corner of his eye,blushing a bit when he realized that you were leaving him a breakfast.You left the fenced in area,the goats trying to follow you out. “Oh,dont act like you dont get all the attention in the world!”You had said quietly to them as they stared up at you.

JJ didnt even wonder how he had heard it from where he was.You were walking towards the tree with a light blue bag.JJ cursed,trying to move higher up in the tree.He hadnt even noticed that he was in the branches above the cows.There were six cows total,two of which were extremely fluffy.When you got to the fence only a few feet away from him you looked over at the tree. “Hey.”You nodded before opening the light blue bag.His eyebrows furrowed,stunned by how casual you were being. “Hi.”He replied,his voice sounding hoarse.He mentally slapped himself,clearing his throat quietly. “You know we dont let anyone pet the goats or hold the chickens until 10.What’s up?”You asked,taking fistfulls of food out of the light blue bag as cows approached you.He rolled his eyes so far back in his head he should’ve been able to see his brain,resting his head against the tree bark.Why did you have to be like this?He actually wanted to talk to you,to have a conversation and make you giggle.

“I mow your lawn on Tuesday’s,princess.”He reminded you.You raised your eyebrows as you pet one of the cows. “J,its monday.”You huffed as you let another cow eat oats straight out of your hand.He scoffed. “It is not-”He paused to take out his phone,checking the day. “Shit.”He groaned.You smiled. “Its fine,JJ.Have you eaten today?”You asked.He grumbled something. “What?”You asked.He sighed. “I said,why do you care?”He asked.You shrugged,tossing out more oats. “Breakfast is really important for you guys.”You replied,eyes going wide when you realized what you said.He squinted. “What?You mean poor people?”He asked,aggravated.You shook your head. “No,JJ.Thats not what I mean at all.You’re a growing boy,you need to eat.”You explained yourself.He hopped down from the tree,towering over you.

You stared up at him.He stared at you with admiration.Your eyes were slightly puffy from just waking up,the whites of your eyes slightly pink.You smelled like peaches,cookie dough and ocean.It was a strange concoction but somehow it was pleasant.You were wearing cute socks that had winnie the pooh on them.You werent wearing shoes though,just the socks and the dress. “So um...I have to collect the chicken eggs.Do you want breakfast or a coffee or something?”You asked,playing with your bracelets.As much as he hated you-or at least as he pretended to hate you he was really hungry.He wasnt hungry.He just wanted to be around you.He shrugged. “Okay,but that doesnt make us friends.”he pointed at you.You nodded,biting back a smile. “Wouldnt dream of it.”You replied.He followed you to the chicken coop. “Morning ladies!”You exclaimed as you opened the nesting boxes,placing the eggs in an egg carton. “Um….Im sorry JJ,but could you please hold this?”You asked,gesturing toward the egg carton.

He held out his hands and you thanked him quietly,handing him the egg carton.Perhaps if he really hated you as much as he said he did he would drop the eggs on purpose.But he didnt.You apologized a few times for the long walk to the house from the chicken coop.You struggled to open the door,kicking it open.He just followed you to the kitchen.Your house was….it was just kind of beautifully chaotic.Murals across the walls,mermaids,a sunset with beautiful blue waves.Your kitchen had white tiles on the floor,marble counter tops and a white fridge.The table had a white tablecloth that was covered with flower print.You placed the two egg cartons you had been carrying down.You jumped a bit when you moved your elbow,feeling JJ right behind you. “Sorry.”You mumbled,moving out of the way.He grinned at how nervous he was making you right now.Usually it was the other way around.Your kitchen smelled like bread and strawberries.His nose was correct.

He spotted jars of strawberry jam and saw a loaf of bread wrapped in parchment paper. “What do you want for breakfast?”You asked him.He glanced at the bread and jam on the countertops.You turned,getting the message.You told him to sit down at the table and he couldnt help but feel a bit uneasy.He’d never been inside your house before.He looked outside your kitchen window to see your garden.Your garden was kind of famous.Lemon and peach trees,berry bushes,flowers,herbs,garlic and potatoes.People from figure 8 would call your father when they were in need of bread,biscuits,muffins,cakes,jellys,jams,eggs.

Basically anything.A good amount of families had hosted birthdays at your house and you’d help your father bake the cakes,usually making spaghetti or mac and cheese for the children.And now JJ was sitting at your kitchen table about to dine like a king free of charge.He took this chance to ask you some questions about yourself,knowing youd probably answer honestly without thinking about it because you were currently busy. “So like...whats the deal with your mom?”He asked.You shrugged your shoulders as you spread jam across a slice of bread. “She dropped me off at the door then disappeared.”You replied.Youd been over the story dozens of times,no emotions even ties to the story at this point.He nodded. “That sucks.”You giggled quietly at the statement.You really didnt care.She made her choice and your father made his.

“So what do you do all day in this house?You never go anywhere.You got a lot of boyfriends that come around?”He asked.You sighed as you cut up an apple.You smiled to yourself.That was the stupidest thing youd ever heard. “I go places.”You retaliated.He scoffed. “Where?Where have you gone?”He asked.You blushed from the realization. “I go to the beach.”You replied,looking over your shoulder. “You need to get out more.Half the people on this island dont even know you exist.”He watched how your body moved as you arranged the apples into a flower. “Okay.”Was all you had do say before you placed the plate down in front of him. “You want some coffee?”you asked.He shook his head.

“Sit down.”He suggested.He was telling you what to do in your own house.That was probably the strangest thing that had happened for you that week.You sat across from him,tapping on the wooden table. “thanks,(Y/N).”He mumbled quietly.You just nodded.He stared down at his plate,not touching the food. “You’re not gonna eat anything?”He asked.You shook your head. “Not up for it,I already had a coffee today.”You replied.He nodded. “You werent freaked out over the fact I was in one of your trees...why?”He asked.You just shrugged. “A lot of weird stuff happens in my life,believe it or not.”You replied,watching him pull apart his bread and stuff it in him mouth. “So...um….are you gonna leave when youre done with breakfast?”You asked.He grinned. “Wow,trying to get rid of me already?”He asked.You huffed. “Its not like that!Im just trying to figure out what my plan is for the day.”You explained yourself.He nodded.

“Its not like you’ve got any big plans.I think im gonna stay around here just to spite you.”He smiled.You nodded. “Okay.”You replied.He ran his hand through his hair. “Im kidding.”He replied.You nodded. “Right.I mean I guess you could stay here if you want.”You offered.He chewed his bottom lip. “What if you come with me to the beach and surf for a while?Ive heard you’re okayish as surfing.”He smirked.You scratched your collarbone. “Uh...okay.Okay.”You mumbled awkwardly.You couldnt believe you had just agreed to hang out with JJ Maybank of all people.He hated you.You just had to hope that he wouldnt murder you or something.His eyes widened. “Yeah?You’re gonna come over to the dark side with me?”He asked,smile widening.You grinned. “Dont make me regret it.”You mumbled,getting up from the table.He heard you go up the stairs and he let out a loud sigh.He really just did that.

He wiped his palms of his shorts,blinking hard.He was gonna spend the day with you.He couldnt mess this up.That being said you already thought he hated you and he was kind of a bitch to you but now you would get to actually hang out with him.This was his chance to become your friend.He ate the rest of his breakfast as quickly as he could,placing the plate in the sink.He heard you come back down stairs.He turned to send you a teasin remark but his jaw fell,eyes going wide when he saw what you were wearing.That sweater.You had changed out of the dress,now wearing black shorts,flip flops and that sweater that looked unbelievably amazing on you. “Uh-youre ready to go?”He asked.You nodded.The two of you walked out and you stopped to grab your surfboard. “I know a good surf spot.”He told you.You nodded.He took you down some old dirt roads and a small path through the woods.WHen you came out of the woods you were on pale hot sand,shells and small smooth rocks sprinkling across the land. “The waves are kinda small but theyll get bigger.”He said,sitting down. “Thats what she said.”You grinned to yourself.

@xlittlemissydjx @lasnaro

#jj maybankxreader #jj maybank #jj x you #jj outer banks #outer banks #jj obx #obx #sarah cameron #john b #rafe cameron #kiara carrera

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prismarine-blocks · 4 years ago

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modpacks we've played

doubles as a handy list for ourselves and for our followers that want to check out modpacks

(not intended to be listed from most to least favorite but it accidentally ended up that way so uhh oops)

stoneblock / sb2

general thoughts: second one is much more polished and better. definitely good for multiple people to work on at once as a team. random rewards are actually useful and can give you good stuff early on!

thoughts on mods: thaumcraft is useless but is actually pretty cool if you choose to get into it. draconic is *chef's kiss* so fucking sexy, along with tinkers construct. resource chickens are GREAT. fluid cows need some polishing and take a stupid amount of wheat and time to get places with. anything past draconic (project E and so on) terrifies me so we haven't done much with it

thermal expansion is GREAT, the little machines make the best noises (esp. the pulverizer. ahhhh). flux networks is also great and i love the interface! ae2 is a pain but arguably fun to work with. i don't use immersive engineering for much tbh but it's good for making cloches :3

other mods are also useful but these are the ones i know off the top of my head by name

tips:

start chickens early on! they are great for getting loads of resources in the beginning of the game- most resources can be obtained through chickens. also, you can stack up to 16 chickens and breed them up to 10/10/10 in stats- if you do that, they'll give you 3 of their item about every second ago

yes, chicken boxes (nesting & breeding) are affected by the acceleration wand. NO they are NOT affected by imaginary time blocks. sorry lads

DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT CURSED EARTH UNLESS YOU ARE READY. enclose that shit in obsidian and have water buckets ready to turn it off in case something goes wrong. also, a little goes a very, very long way

have at least one cloche for wheat. you'll need both the seeds and the wheat itself (if you have too much wheat and not enough seeds, you can get one seed from 2 wheat in your crafting panel)

don't worry about the inventory crafting extension. it's cool and all but if you're anything like me you'll either forget you have it or hate it because it doesn't use the same interface as crafting tables/stations

the ME system (computer) is super time consuming to build but also extremely fucking useful. do yourself a favor and build that before any mob farms. your storage space will thank you

don't forget to add in optifine if you like to use it, and also be sure to slap this mod (not the rewritten version! that one may not work) in there so you can grow top tier inferium + nether star seeds in the cloches. note that you CAN'T grow neutronium in there, sorry :(

challenge ideas:

actually use thaumcraft lol

don't use the mining dimension. for this you'll need to do a LOT of hammering and sieving- luckily there are autohammers/sieves just for this! :)

---

skyfactory 4

general thoughts: hehe skyblock

really though, fun pack! great for working on as a team. in fact i'd honestly recommend it

thoughts on mods: sky orchards is time consuming but it's a nice way to gather resources! haven't used resource hogs at all, honestly not sure if they're necessary. tinkers is here and i LOVE the porcelain smeltery. very compact, very cute. can't remember a lot of other mods right now but the pack is generally pretty nice™

tips:

you can't smelt cobble in the porcelain smeltery to get seared stone, so try to use petrified resin blocks instead

get hopping bonsais asap! also remember that they need to be on a chest to deposit their contents

slab chests aren't really worth it. slab furnaces and tables though..... Slightly more worth it. i still wouldn't really recommend them except for the achievement tbh

if you don't want a super horizontal base, build up! you have a LOT of room to build upwards, and you have the ability to climb walls (jump, shift + w, then tap shift while holding w to get to the top)

if you're in a snowy biome, put something above your smeltery. snow will break it if it starts building up layers on the inside

slime boots are your best friend! great for if you accidentally fall off. easiest way to get them is building a smeltery and then standing in it for the congealed blood

nether portals don't work, don't spend time on making one! check out the cakes instead (just make sure you aren't making xl food mod ones)

---

compact claustrophobia

general thoughts: literal actual hell in a cube. fun! not the best for multiple people to work on as a team; there are certain places where the quest trees kinda bottleneck and it's difficult for people to work on the same thing. don't recommend if playing in tight spaces actually affects your claustrophobia

and yes. the fart sounds stop being funny after a while. like the second time tbh

thoughts on mods: i don't know most of the mods in here by name- or at least, ones that aren't also in sb2- so i can't give much in specifics. that said, whatever gives you the thermoelectric generators is great and really useful for power. also the autoclickers are 👌

tips:

do yourself a favor and grind for more tiny compact machines. you'll need some later and you'll also want to use them for extra space

autoclickers + vacuumulator + hopper and chest setup works Great, def recommend. also as a note, try to avoid standing in front of autoclickers that are left clicking- they DO hurt you

save your poop and work on getting a farm asap. you can use it as fuel that smelts up to 32 items if you just mix it with wheat

(i haven't played this as much as sb2 so unfortunately i don't have much to say)

challenge idea: only use one room of each size at a time. this is going to be nearly impossible given the size of a lot of machines, but trust me, it's (probably) possible

---

sevtech ages

general thoughts: bullshit. not in a fun way. it's really just complex for the sake of being complex tbfh. you want a challenge that's actually just hours upon hours of suffering? congrats here you go

the only thing that makes this better than rlcraft is the fact that it has an actual quest/achievement line and doesn't absolutely hate its players

thoughts on mods: the only cool one is whatever you build the totem pole and do dances for, that's it. maybe the dark forest place too bc it looks cool even if it IS a pain in the ass as well. tombstones are kinda useful too tbh

tips:

don't play this

if you still want to play this, don't

really though: the saw is useful

the watermill is arguably better than the windmill

try to set your base somewhere close to an ocean or river biome; those are the only places with unlimited water until you get aqueducts

get an autoclicker for grinding stuff with the lever. trust me your fingers will thank you

backpacks will be your new best friends. embrace this

getting through each age takes a LOT of time. don't feel bad for taking breaks

challenge ideas: honestly the game is hard enough on its own, i can't really think of anything that would make stuff harder... outside of maybe smth like "only do things manually, don't use horsepower" or whatever, which is just plain mean at this point

---

rlcraft

general thoughts: don't

thoughts on mods: just don't

tips:

love yourself

do not play this

don't even think about it

i know it's all haha fun youtube right now

but please don't do this to yourself

challenge idea: don't touch this ever

actually serious thoughts: super overrated. incredibly frustrating. another pack that isn't challenging so much as just fucking horrible. it's mean! it hates you! you'll eventually hate it too! i've sunk so much time into this and honestly? it's just not worth it. it really just isn't. nothing you do will ever please the gods of rlcraft and if you're lucky you'll build a nice sexy base that will be gone the next time you die because the game decided your bed wasn't valid :)

if you want an actual challenge, play compact claustrophobia. play packs that limit you in terms of space or resource gathering. don't play packs like this that are only hard because they spawn big fuckoff dragons that burn everything all the time constantly, or that respawn you fuck knows where bc somehow your bed unloaded or """got obstructed""", or that have mobs that will literally go through walls just to commit murder. oh and half the time you can't even sleep because it just randomly spawns a mob that can kill you!! just don't do it, man. your time and energy are worth more than that

#minecraft #modpacks #mc mods #mc modpacks #minecraft modpacks #not blocks #musings #how tf do people tag mod stuff again

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strawberryspeachy · 3 years ago

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What do you do of course you support your family because family is most important

A few months before I went to college I decided I’m not gonna go out of state I’m gonna stay home I’m gonna go to community college but then I had an argument with my mom because she forgot that I told her that I needed to go somewhere I always told her my whole life I always told her but because she was upset that she was forgetting things she picked fights with me and of course I was a teenager I fought with her - it wasn’t really anyone’s fault we were just having an argument and then my grandfather came running up the steps and screamed at me yelling at me about how I’m not allowed to fight with my grandmother and how dare I talk to her like that. Him and my great grandmother were always doing stuff like that

My mom always apologized I always apologized we hated fighting we didn’t stay angry at each other for long. I was sick of getting screamed out all the time so I left and I went to a college that I couldn’t afford and that I was miserable at because I wanted to get out of my house and live far away from my grandfather and my great grandmother

And even after my great grandmother died my mother who is a crazy narcissist kept doing things like spilling stuff through the ceiling of my room or breaking things screaming at me forcing me to be her taxi stomping around the house being just sadistic to me and mom and I fought with her but she kept cooking food for my grandfather at that point to get on his good side

And he didn’t like people fighting so he always took her aside and she was always making stuff up and trying to get me in trouble literally trying to get me kicked out of the only home that I’ve ever known for my entire life because she was too busy getting high on the streets she wasn’t around that was my home it wasn’t her home but because she thought it was funny or some shit to get me in trouble she’d literally try to get me kicked out of my home

Day in and day out that woman constantly harassing me breaking my stuff screaming at me and then when my grandfather sold the house he kept talking about how he was going to kick both of us out because apparently I was equally as responsible for the person that my entire family literally moved from our first house to get away from we moved to my home to get away from my psychotic mother and her drugs and her crazy friends

And my uncle who also Fucking knows how psychotic my mother is came up and made us write out a contract when we were moving about how we weren’t going to fight or have any arguments even though it was literally always her starting it she called me a racial fucking slur she screamed at me in the middle of a fucking grocery store because I asked her to not go play the freaking lottery tickets because I wanna go home I’m not be her taxi it’s not my fault that she didn’t want to learn to drive

But it was my fault

And my uncle and my grandfather support her being psychotic toward me and are constantly always blaming me I had to clean the house my house with poop caked on the floor where when the toilet that was always overflowing would go through the ceiling would come through the light sockets and I had to clean my moms room I had to give my mom a bath I cleaned up my mom‘s poop but no one believe that I did anything because my mother would take credit for all of it and before her my great grandmother would take credit for all of it no one fucking believe that I did anything because both of them would always just make me out to be the bad guy to everyone

And even my uncle came up and helped clean out my great grandmothers room when my mom fell and before we moved we put her in that room and no one knew how to clean it and I had to tell them how to clean it because I’m the only fucking person aside from my mom who knew how to clean the house and suddenly they were like oh maybe your mother is a liar because she doesn’t know how to clean it and you do and you do it well because you do it all the fucking time but no that didn’t actually prove anything just a momentary not me getting bitched at

[the picture is of kittens. Can you find the kiddens? Theres three and their mom. That was (the middle of) my moms room… not even at its worse. The whole house looked like that. This is a picture before the cat/dog/cow/human poop was stomped into the floorboards in her room]

So I want to go home and I want to help my grandfather get better but then what. what the fuck do I do my mom isn’t there if it were my mom I would’ve already bought the ticket I’d be on my way I’d be leaving. I still love my grandfather it’s not his fault that my great grandmother traumatized and made them into an angry drunken asshole but it doesn’t change the fact that when I’m around him I feel like I’m walking on eggshells it doesn’t change that a lot of my current issues are because he was an asshole and I’m already dealing with my mom not being here and I don’t know what to do

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 4 years ago

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Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 156

156

At the back of the aquarium was the animal park/zoo. Lance wanted to feed the deers, so they did, his boyfriend would have adopted them all if left alone unsupervised for too long. For someone who hadn’t wanted a cow, Lance was pretty attached to his cow. His boyfriend fawning over everything that moved. Zero fear at all when it came to the snakes, where Keith liked to think he has a healthy fear of them. They did their own thing and he did his own thing. Never the pair to cross paths. How could they have snakes near open pens with pattble bunnies did his head in. Didn’t they worry the snakes would get the rabbits? The pavilion was dedicated to kids more than adults, Lance seemed to fit right in. Keith conned into rabbit cuddles. As nice as it was terrifying trying not to drop the rabbit, Kosmo was cuter when he’d been smaller. Lance just as cute as he smiled up at him holding his own rabbit happily. The rabbit in Keith’s arms was... he supposed... cuterish... until it pooped and Lance cackled so hard he had lean against the rabbit pen wall. This was why Kosmo was better. Keith taking a baby wipe from a zoo worker to clean up the mess on his hand as the rabbit was half dropped and half thrown the few inches back into its pen. Fuck rabbits and fuck snakes. They weren’t for him. He had Kosmo and he had Blue. That was definitely enough to keep him happy in the fur department.

Stumbling his steps, Keith came to a stop as he held Lance to him. His boyfriend’s colour faded from his face as sweat beads rolled down his forehead. The day wasn’t terribly warm, but the lack of cloud cover and coming out the air conditioning must have been getting to Lance. The pavilion was like a cool oasis before you stepped out into heat and the paths that looped around back to where they currently were

“Babe, want to take a break?”

Expecting Lance to say no, because he was a stubborn idiot about all the wrong things, his boyfriend nodded

“Sorry. I need to sit for a bit”

Okay. He wasn’t going to freak out. Nope. Lance had made it clear he was over being fussed over. A quick scan and he’d found a converted building with a neon sign in the window

“There’s a cafe. Let’s get something to drink”

“Yeah... I need a moment”

Propping Lance up, Keith lead them over to the cafe where he glared a couple away from the only available seats on the shaded veranda of the old building. Sitting Lance down, his boyfriend pushed his chair back, leaning heavily on his thighs as he hunched forward, legs spread as if he thought he might vomit between his feet

“Babe?”

“I’m sorry. Can you get me some water?”

“Yep. Hang on. Don’t move, I’ll be right back”

Grabbing two bottles of water Keith’s anxieties had him practicing what he’d say to the server as he took his place in line. The family at the sandwich counter were fighting with kids over having to eat sandwiches and not cream topped cake. The aircon in the house barely seemed to make a dent, and when he got to the counter he fumbled down both bottles of water, flustered and annoyed over the wait. Paying for both bottles hurt his heart. No bottle of water ever should cost $5 each. That was ridiculous. If Lance hadn’t needed water he’d definitely have had some very choice words to say over how they ran their cafe. In his rush to get back to Lance he nearly forgot his wallet, then bumped squarely into some kid that started crying. Apologising to the cranky mother who rushed to her precious darlings side, Keith had had enough of crowds. Enough of people. Like, couldn’t they see he was in an obvious rush? Or did they expect him to make Lance wait, then would complain if Lance threw up in front of their kids? People were too damn complicated. He should have been paying better attention to when Lance stopped laughing and started stumbling.

Lance had stripped off his jumper and used it to cover his belly as he leant against the veranda railing in his chair. His boyfriend still looked ill, but at least he was upright. A few people were glancing in his direction. Keith resisting the urge to snap at them for staring. If they were going to state they could at least offer assistance

“Babe, I’ve got the water”

Raising his head Lance blinked at him, a smile slowly coming to his lips

“Hmm... what? Oh. Thanks...”

“Are you okay? You don’t look like you feel very well”

“Just a little faint. And a whole lot of thirsty. Why do you smell funny?”

Keith handed Lance his bottle of water, using himself to shield Lance from those staring. Raising his upper slightly, Keith didn’t want to think about whatever had been on the kids hands, or on its face. He was going to be a horrible parent. What kind of person felt icky about a strangers dirty kid? Kids were dirty creatures

“Bumped into a kid. More like they bumped into me. I have no idea why it was on the loose”

“You were rushing, weren’t you?”

Sprung. He couldn’t help but rush. Ten minutes in a line of people who felt as frustrated as he did then turned out to not be able to make their damn minds up either. Then again, the cakes did actually look good. Maybe had Krolia not given him food poisoning he would have picked a slice to share with his boyfriend

“Maybe?”

Lance sighed, cracking open his bottle of water as he did. His boyfriend realising he was watching him

“Come sit down already. I’m alright. I’m feeling better in the shade”

“You said you felt faint. If this is too much...”

How often did Lance feel faint? Often enough to hide it from him?

“Keith, sit down already. It’s hotter out here than I expected. That’s it. I’m fine”

Keith didn’t quite believe Lance as he sat across from him. They’d done a fair bit of walking. The complex deceptively large inside with the outdoor area feeling more like an after thought. Still, this was closest thing to an actual zoo in the area. It made sense why it’d be so popular with families

“You’re frowning. What’s on your mind?”

“How often do you feel faint?”

Lance sighed at him

“It’s okay. I’ve normally had a nap by now and I didn’t sleep that much last night. But I’m fine now I’m sitting. You should drink your water or you’ll end up dehydrated”

“Are you you don’t need it?”

Lance rolled his eyes at him

“Babe. You’ve got to relax. Besides, my bladder is like the size of a walnut these days. I’ve already had to pee like three times. It’s repetitive”

“Was it because of the water?”

Maybe the sound of running water or being surrounded by so much of it was making his boyfriend pee more?

“Nope. I know what you’re hinting at and no. Seriously, they don’t over exaggerate this peeing thing. Everything’s all squished up to make space for these two”

“I’m sorry”

Lance sighed at him again. Replacing the cap on his bottle of water as he leaned on the table

“You don’t need to be sorry. I know you’ve got new dad jitters. I’m enjoying myself, and if it’s any indication by how much these two are moving, they are too. What do you think of this place?”

Keith let Lance have the topic change, sitting back in his chair as he nodded

“It’s cool. I mean. It’s not like hugely fancy, but it’s cool. The rabbits suck”

“I don’t know. I thought they were kind of cute”

“Because you didn’t get crapped on”

“That was definitely an advantage. It’s nice. Just seeing all these people going about their lives. It’s nice”

There was a clear “but” in Lance’s tone

“But...”

“Honestly, a kid tripped and I smelt blood. Kids trip all the time, but it got me wondering how I’d react to our kids”

“And?”

“And I don’t know. It kind of scares me. I mean, I think I’ll be okay. I think it’s just all these extra hormones amping up my senses. I’ve taken care of Pidge and Hunk before, and you without going crazy. I think I’m just over thinking it”

“You wanted to help the kid, didn’t you?”

“Yeah. I think I’m touchy because it’s a kid. They’re supposed to be enjoying themselves and not face planting on the walkways”

“They’ll be fine. Seriously though... these kids are scary”

Lance chuckled, his colour still wasn’t improving but if he could laugh Keith would take it as a sign his boyfriend felt a bit better

“That’s going to be us. And we’re going to have two of them. I hope they don’t inherit your sense of direction”

“Rude. I got us here in one piece”

“You did. It hasn’t quite been the same riding around in a car since... you know”

Since Lance flipped a truck to save him and Curtis...

“You still think about that?”

“I think about how damn lucky we were. I don’t know how you’re so willing to get back on your bike after it”

“I haven’t really thought about it. I mean, my accident wasn’t that bad. And I’ve missed my bike. Do you want me to sell it?”

Lance shook his head immediately

“No. No. I mean, I don’t love your bike but you do. I want you to have the things you love. I’m going to have to get used to it sooner rather than later”

“It has been off the road as long as you’ve been pregnant”

“I know. I’m still not sure how we made the twins...”

“When a daddy loves a daddy...”

Groaning at him, Lance’s smile only grew

“When a weird vampire drinks the blood of a weirdo, magical things happen?”

“Something like that. What do you want to do after this?”

Keith had a plan of how he wanted the day to go. First the Aquarium Centre, then out for lunch, then putting on his big boy pants and facing crowds. Lance needed more clothes, especially with how large his stomach was getting. Plus, he wanted to see Lance getting excited over things for their twins. He wanted to check out furniture... maybe choose a theme? That’s what parents did right?

“Maybe take a nap? I know it’s not a very exciting outcome”

“Babe, it’s fine. We can totally head back to the apartment and take a nap. I have no idea how I’m supposed to go back to work with all this time off”

“Does that mean you take a secret nap in the afternoons at the garage?”

Hunk would let him. Matt would see an open opportunity to get up to some kind of mischief. Grease on his hands. A grease moustache. Anything was possible if he let his guard down

“No. But I have thought about it. Then I remember Matt’s there and I think again”

“I don’t think he’d play up at work. You know Rieva tried to pay me rent? I mean, who charges their family rent?”

“Parents?”

Lance shrugged

“Mami never charged me. I told her to put it towards the food bill instead. I’m paying the same amount no matter the number of people in the household”

“You’re using more power and water”

“Yeah, but I’d still rather them save up for their own place or save towards going to see Rieva’s parents. This time last year it was only me and Blue”

“And now?”

“And now we’ve got a whole family in there. I’m so grateful to have met all of you... I’m going to be sad when Curtis leaves for good. It’s not the same without him there”

Keith huffed, hoping his expression seemed as if he was acting hurt

“Should I worry you’re going to run off with him?”

“I don’t know. He does give a pretty good running commentary when we’re watching our shows together. And he’s stopped coming at me with sex toys”

“What am I supposed to tell Shiro when you two elope?”

Lance choked on air, coughing as he shook his head

“I don’t want to die... Shiro would kill me. What about you? Would you stop the wedding?”

“Nope. I’d burn down the church so you couldn’t marry him in the first place”

“Babe, you can’t burn down churches!”

Still coughing, Lance opened his bottle of water again and proceeded to choke on that too. Keith hanging his head, useless against an invisible enemy. He’d gone and made himself upset with his own jokes. Lance was right though. Curtis was into cheesy dramas and Keith really wasn’t. Asking questions only got him glared at as Lance would be forced to spend more time explaining things to him than watching his show. Slowly recovering, Lance wiped his mouth, still coughing slightly as he shook his head again

“I have to pee again. I’ll be right back”

“You’ll be okay?”

Lance gestured towards the sign Keith hadn’t noticed. There were toilets at the side of the cafe

“I’ll be right back. Here, look after my stuff”

Lance’s stuff was his wallet and phone. Keith tapping the screen to check the time and noticing Lance had half a dozen missed calls from Hunk and Matt, his boyfriend’s phone set to “Do Not Disturb”. That couldn’t be good. Pulling out his own phone, Keith opened up his contacts, calling Matt instead of Hunk. Hunk would have been the better one to call, but if something was going on, Matt would be the calmer one to relay information. The call took long enough to connect that Keith was bored of holding his phone to his ear, and a little annoyed Matt hadn’t answered immediately

“Keith?”

“You called? What’s wrong now?”

Okay. He could have hidden someone of his annoyance, but Matt could have also texted whatever was up to Lance

“Oh! Shit. Yeah. Are you with Lance?”

No. He was on a doomed mission to Pluto. Where else was he going to be?”

“Yeah, we’re on a date. What’s going on?”

“His sister showed up here today. No idea what she wanted, but she left in a hurry. Rieva saw her as she was leaving for work”

“Which sister?”

“I don’t know... Rieva said she was pretty shocked to see her, then didn’t look too happy Lance wasn’t home”

“Did she say anything else?”

“Nope. She thought I should call you guys and let you know as soon as possible. She said she caught her peaking in through the lounge room window”

That couldn’t be good. What the hell was Lance’s sister doing showing up?!

“Thanks for letting me know. I’ll let Lance know. If you see her again, don’t bother asking why she’s around...”

“I know it’s complicated, but you sound like you’re not going to tell Lance. Has something happened?”

Maybe the thought had crossed Keith’s mind, but Lance wouldn’t be impressed if Keith didn’t tell him

“Not that I know. I don’t think it’s a touching family reunion she’s after”

“Hunk said the same thing. Anyway, bro. I’ll let you get back to your date. Are you guys coming home today?”

“Maybe. Lance wants to spend some time with Curtis”

“Okay, well, Rieva put the alarm on. I’ll let you know if his sister shows up again”

“Thanks”

Keith hung up as Matt was saying his goodbyes. Keith now really wasn’t sure what to do. He couldn’t tell Lance that one of his sisters was snooping around his house. He vaguely remembered Rachel had drug problems, so maybe... she was going to break in? Veronica had kids... what had she done with them? Luis and Lisa hadn’t told Nadia and Sylvio about Lance. Or was it Lisa? Had Luis sent Lisa to ask for Mami’s ring? Maybe Rieva had gotten it wrong and it wasn’t Lance’s sister... but then who would it be? Why would some strange woman who wasn’t Krolia be poking around Lance’s home? Rome better not have reversed their decision. Fucking Matt had ruined his whole mood. Shoved the responsibility on him, and now it’d be on his mind until the end of their date if he didn’t tell Lance about it right now. Keith didn’t want to skip the nocturnal section. He wanted to get his own back over the rabbit incident by teasing Lance over a family reunion with the bats. He missed Lance’s tiny little bat form. With his chubby belly and tiny little teeth as he fed from Keith’s finger. He wished he’d taken video of Lance floating around in the ice cream container in the bathtub. Or with his bubble beard and unamused look... But if he told Lance, Lance would be depressed and worried for the rest of their visit to the zoo.

Waiting for his boyfriend to return, Keith started getting concerned as people came and went from the public toilets with none of those people being Lance. Gathering up their things, Keith ignored the few looks he got as he left the veranda area and turned the corner to head into the public toilets. Stared at as if his arrival was somehow startling, Keith made his over to the three cubicles against the wall. Leaning against the corner as if he was waiting in line, and not waiting to see who came out of which one to determine where his boyfriend was.

Pretending to be polite, Keith gestured to those actually as the two cubicles opened, with Lance in the closest, he was grateful the zoo employed the simple turn locks and nothing fancy as he slipped the edge of one of Lance’s key into the small slit, to let himself into the cubicle. Sitting on the toilet lid, Lance had a wad of tissues to his nose as he cried silently, Keith rushing to lock the door behind him and move to kneel in front of his boyfriend

“Babe?”

Raising his head, Lance hiccuped softly, relief coming into his big blue eyes

“Keith...”

That was all it took for Keith to be wrapping his arms around his boyfriend. Lance shuddering as he let out an audible sob

“Babe, what happened?”

If someone had hurt Lance, he was going to murder them very slowly for daring to touch him. Logic out the window, and the numerous other reasons Lance’s nose could be bleeding, out with it

“I’m... I... panicked... and I... my nose”

Lance sounded all stuffy, as he would have if he had a broken nose or a head cold

“Can I see?”

Nodding Lance drew back, Keith cupping his face in his hands as his boyfriend pulled the toilet paper away from his nose

“What happened?”

“I panicked... and bumped a guy who pushed me... and I smacked my face”

Who the fuck shoved someone who’d bumped them by accident?!

“I’m going to kill him”

“No... no... this is my fault”

“Babe, your nose is messed up!”

Why couldn’t Lance admit that he wasn’t to blame?! Clearly the other guy had over reacted

“I... he broke my nose... and my arm... and I... I killed him”

Hang on. What? Keith hadn’t seen any dead bodies in the bathroom. A normal human had a habit of screaming in the face of a discovery like that. The only person... oh...

“Hey. Hey, you’re okay. He’s gone. He’s gone and he’s not going to hurt you again”

“I know... I didn’t mean to panic... the... the basement had a stone floor and it came out of nowhere... and I tried to hide it... but I...”

Lance was starting to smell sweet. The wanker who’d pushed him had pushed him right over the edge. He was lucky Lance was coherent enough to talk to him. Fucking Sendak

“Okay. You’re okay. I’m sorry I didn’t come faster. Does your nose hurt?”

Lance nodded, bottom lip bleeding too from where his fangs had pierced it. Lance didn’t tell him Sendak broke his nose and his arm. Keith wished he could resurrect the wank stain and lop his damn head off for himself

“My whole head hurts. He hurt Curtis and I lost my head. I didn’t... I...”

“Shhh. You were in an impossible situation. You need to calm your breathing down. Can you do that?”

“I can’t smell you...”

Thanks to fucking blood across his face

“I know. I’m here though. Breathe through your mouth. In for 6 out for 12...”

Lance nodded at him, making the attempt

“Good. Good, just like that. Just like that. He’s gone and you never have to see him again... just keep breathing for me”

As Lance kept on with trying to calm his breathing, Keith pulled off a long strip of toilet paper, starting to clean his boyfriend’s face up. Lance would heal, but it wasn’t fair that some douche took his bad mood out on him. Lance’s voice wavered as he mumbled

“Is it bad?”

“I’m pissed as hell, but not at you”

“I’m trying. I am... but... when I saw the floor I panicked...”

“Hey. You’re not to blame”

“I ruined our whole date!”

“You didn’t ruin anything. Nothing at all. You’re okay now. Fuck... I should have come in with you”

“You were on the phone”

Right. Super hearing. Lance had probably heard every rude thing whispered as people watched him recovering. He couldn’t lie. Lance deserved better than a lie, even if this wasn’t the time for the truth

“Matt called. He said your sister came to see you. Rieva didn’t know which one”

Lance’s sharp intake of breath cause Keith to knock his boyfriend’s nose, more blood running from his nostrils in a fresh wave as he hissed in pain

“Sorry! I’m so sorry...”

Lance whimpered as Keith wiped the blood up. Shiro would have once lost his shit over him doing this without thinking twice

“Can we go home? I... want to go home...”

“Yeah, babe. We’ll wait a little longer until your nose stops bleeding. Do you need anything? Can I get you anything? Did he hurt you anywhere else?”

“N-no... I scratched myself... with my nails... I didn’t...”

“Shhh. You’re not to blame and you’d be saying the same thing if our positions were reversed. Can you show me?”

Lance’s nails were long and lethal looking. His boyfriend had scratched up the soft skin of his inner left wristKeith had a fair idea of what happened. Lance would have walked into the bathroom, moving out the way of someone leaving. He’d probably looked down and seen the floor. Feeling himself panicking and his body reacting, his boyfriend would have tried to hide in the first available cubicle, accidentally bumping the guy who’d shoved him out the way. With how good Lance’s memory was, he’d be recalling Sendak’s touch, associating it with the feel of his nose getting messed up and panicked further. When had going to the toilet become so dangerous? People sucked.

“A few scratches but your jumper will hide them. You’ll be okay. We’ll go back to the apartment and we can snuggle”

“I’m so sorry... I ruined our whole date”

“You didn’t. You didn’t do a single thing wrong”

“I must have... he shoved me so hard...”

Why hadn’t he grabbed his fucking gun? Stabbing the guy didn’t seem as good as shooting him in both feet and making the man walk himself to help

“He’s the one with the problem, not you. Let me clean your chin up. You’ve got blood down you front”

Using up most of his bottle of water, Keith got Lance as cleaned up his could. His boyfriend’s scent spiking in waves, Lance not mentioning it so Keith didn’t either. Replacing the toilet paper with a fresh wad, once Lance had his jumper back on, Keith got his boyfriend standing then flushed away all the evidence, careful to triple check there was no split blood on the floor or the door. So much for the peaceful date that they both more than deserved.

#once bitten twice stupid #oncebittentwicestupid #ashratherose

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lightkrets312 · 4 years ago

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Rusty Lake Series - Content Warnings

Games Included:

Cube Escape: Seasons - 12 Warnings

Cube Escape: The Lake - 5 Warnings

Cube Escape: Arles - 7 Warnings

Cube Escape: Harvey’s Box - 5 Warnings

Cube Escape: Case 23 - 16 Warnings

Cube Escape: The Mill - 14 Warnings

Cube Escape: Birthday - 17 Warnings

Cube Escape: Theater - 10 Warnings

Cube Escape: The Cave - 9 Warnings

Warnings listed beneath the cut! (List created Oct.31.2020; edited Nov.03.2020; edits/suggestions welcome!)

Major Warnings include (but not limited to): Several human AND animal deaths, suicide, self-harm and dismemberment, guns and gun violence, alcohol, drugs (presciption and not), loud noises, possible epilepsy triggers, and more. (Death in general is a theme.) Sickness, pestilence, insects, murder, poison, literal shit, fire, and more are also included, especially in the purchaseable games!

Cube Escape: Seasons

On-Screen Character Death (violent)

Animals (Bird; Parrot.)

Animal Death (bird)

Blood (several times)

Flashing Lights (minor but present; fireplace effects and outline in a frame. Some flashing images over the screen when interacting with items (Mushroom))

Screen Distortions (”old footage” filter as a map transition and some screen visuals)

Jumpscares, all minor but include sudden noises. (Character Death on the moon, egg possibly included)

Sharp Things (knife, axe, broken glass)

Drugs, only shown (Prescription (Prozac) and mushrooms (implied effects; see screen distortions))

Insects (black moths(?))

Disembodied Limbs (An eye on the ceiling; a hand in a pot; not explicitly bloodied but not connected to a body.)

Loud Noises (Screaming, avoidable)

Cube Escape: The Lake

Fishing as a core mechanic

Dead body (Not sure how to summarize this one. You find a corpse.)

Animal Death (shrimp, fish)

Jumpscare; minor but includes sudden noises (Corpse moves/twitches.)

Cube Escape: Arles

Disembodied Limbs (eyeball; no blood, just no body)

Animals (shrimp, fish)

Blood

Self Harm/Dismemberment (Ear gets cut off)

Death(?) (shooting (cut to black effect so not entirely onscreen), but no blood. Not sure if what’s shot counts as human, but it gets shot and then it’s gone, so it counts as dead.)

Weird Eye Stuff (eyes roll back in head)

Key Hidden in Mouth (i don't know how to describe this one...)

Highly-Detailed Ear Closeup

Gun (which is used later on)

Cube Escape: Harvey’s Box

Screen Distortions

Jumpscares, minor but includes sudden noises (creature reaching towards you)

Animals (Fish; Regular and with human limbs. Birds; Pigeon, Crow-man, and the player (Parrot).)

Insects (Maggots and Flies, Fireflies(?))

Cube Escape: Case 23

Flashing Lights (box outlines in a TV screen)

Screen Distortions (TV static on a TV, if it counts; some distorted wallpaper in part 4)

Jumpscares, most minor but includes sudden noises (someone’s head turns real weird; creature hits window; everything in part 4)

Two Character Death (offscreen deaths, onscreen bodies; one corpse at a murder scene, one is hanged)

Animal Death (bird is fed to a cat; deer befuckery, can avoid viewing it.)

Blood (Corpse at the crime scene; deer?)

Bugs in mouth, twice. (One pinchy bug thing; moths(?))

Disfigurement (mouth stitched shut)

...Bird head in mouth?? (I have no idea how to describe this one)

Human fetus in a jar.

Disembodied Limbs (finger; heart; eye)

Animals (Cat. Bird; picture of a parrot, baby crow. Deer.)

Insects (see Bugs in mouth; flies (non-moving/dead))

Animal Poop

Timed Puzzle (all of part 4)

Cube Escape: The Mill

Flashing Lights

Character Death (offscreen; body in a grandfather clock; murder in the cupboard)

Jumpscares (body falls out of clock; owl man appears)

Loud Noises (screaming)

Animal Death (cooked duck and fish; cow loses its head)

Disfigurement (mouth stitching)

Violent Imagery (bloody knife; murder)

Sharp Things (Knife; axe)

Teeth (part of a puzzle, also unhealthy)

Animals (Bird; Parrot, Owl-man, Duck, Crow (optional). Cow.)

Insects (moths(?); spider web, no spider)

Blood

Animal Poop

Cube Escape: Birthday

Screen Distortions as transitions

Character Death (four times)

Animal Death (feed fish to bird)

Gun Violence (there's a shooting or two )

Blood

Possibly Disconnected Hand

Loud Noises (screaming, gun shots, explosion, tea kettle)

Sharp Things (knife, needle, broken flower pot, broken vase)

Needle in a cake

Alcohol

Animals (Cat. Fish. Rabbit-man.)

Animal Poop

Cube Escape: Theater

Jumpscares, with accompanying Loud Noises (mirror puzzle)

Loud Noises (Screaming)

Three Character Deaths (Two Throat openings (spontaneous); One suicide (gun-to-head, death isn't instant))

Blood (several instances)

Self-Harm and Suicide (Banging head into countertop; gun)

Alcohol (Several mixed drinks; there's a bar)

Items Hidden In Mouth (Screwdriver)

Disembodied Limbs (Heart; Hand in a piano (maybe counts?))

Human Fetus (in a toilet)

Animals (Bird; Parrot, Crow mask, Owl mask. Fish.)

Cube Escape: The Cave

Jumpscare (Big fish suddenly appears; shark suddenly appears; shadow creature suddenly appears.)

Character Death (Death elixir (cartoon on wall); implied suicide.)

Animal Death (Cooking fish as a mechanic)

Suicide, implied (Black Cube Minigame)

Self-Harm/Dismemberment (someone in a wall cuts their arm off)

You grind up an arm and feed it to a dog. I don't know how to warn for this one.

Insects (Moths, Spiders, Fireflies, Beetles. Unknown creature in the background, but it's big.)

Animals (Dog; bulldog. Bat. Bird; Crow-man, Owl-man, Parrot. Fish; Assorted, shark, anglerfish. Crab.)

Animal Poop

#my post #rusty lake cube escape #people are more than welcome to suggest edits and rephrasements! some of these are weird ones and i dunno how to warn for em #i may also move the list to a google doc in the future cause there's gonna be a lot of these!#but it's a horror game so what's new #ask to tag #seriously ask to tag cause there's... a lot #long-post

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proprhettcies · 4 years ago

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Season 5 Episodes 41-50 (395-404)

S5 Ep 41 (395)- Accidentally saying “I love you”

Instagram

Zestee

Bacon Mayonaise

More- Link gets a spray tan “Call me Zestee”

shade in abs-contouring

S5 Ep 42 (396)- Top 5 Strengths

Personal strengths

sparkgood.com

Future Rhett obsess with future

Link

-Achiever

-Focus

-Individualization

-Analytical

-Maximizer

Rhett

-Futurist

-Competitive

- Activator

-Ideation

-Command

WoM- Rhett gets fired from GMM

S5 Ep 43 (397)- Science of Selfies

2002- 1st use of term selfie

2011- 1st use of the #selfie

Duckface

Head Tilt

Rhett and Link’s individual Igs

S5 Ep 44 (398)- Crazy Selfie List

Photoshop selfies

Rhett’s IG

Picture heavy episode

3 years of French

Smellovision

S5 Ep 45 (399)- Beard Transplants

Beard facts

Beardless Rhett

S5 Ep 46 (400)- 400th Episode

-cake w/ 400 candles

-hat with 400 written on it

-Shaving a pie in Link’s face- used cake instead

-strobe lights/confetti/ dancing

-400 times song

On way to 500 eps

going beyond 800 episodes

Short Summer Break

S5 Ep 47 (401)- 7 extinct animals we wish were back

-The Laughing Owl

-The Giant Sloth

-The Dodo Bird

-The Golden Toad

-The Great Auk

-The Irish Deer or Elk

- The Stellar Sea Cow

- Argentavis Magnifcens

- Tasmanian Tiger

- Sabertooth Tiger

Bringing the mammoth back

S5 Ep 48 (402)- Death Valley nudist encounter

Their friend Nick

Off-roading

Rhett’s Bronco

S5 Ep 49 (403)- Apps you won’t believe exist #1

Lie detector test

Apps

- Pimple Popper real

- Watching Cute Girl real

-The Coolocator fake

- Igotcha Sucka! real

-INap@Work real

- Slam It! Wrestling Personifier fake

-Magic Phone fake

-Ghost Radar Classic real

-E-Groomer Pocket Edition fake

- Poop Log real

WoM- Rhett talks to his imaginary friend named Barbara

S5 Ep 50 (404)- Multiverse

Many Worlds Theory

Harry Potter Superman Batman

Multiverse of GMM

- Rhett and Link switch seats and speak more formal

- Rhett has glasses and Link wears pants on his head

-Communicate only in facial expressions and GMM is a cooking show

-Play with cars

R- “There’s a universe where my hair goes down and yours goes up.”- 2014

#gmm #season 5 #episodes 41-50 (395-404)#rhett and link #good mythical morning

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weaselle · 5 years ago

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Let’s talk about Witchcraft!

I used to pal around with people who considered themselves witches and pagans. California is a great place for finding people of a similar mindset, and I began a journey into what I then considered witchcraft with books by Aleister Crowley and a skill with tarot cards. Later, I celebrated a year’s worth of Sabbats with a group I joined in Germany. In Alabama I helped a couple people who were struggling with leaving christianity remain connected to a natural spiritualism through concepts such as the Lord and Lady. But my personal witching identity never truly fell in line with Wiccan paganism.

My grandmother had Gifts, I’ve written about them before. She had The Voice and she had True Dreams and some kind of Sight, all of which I personally witnessed before she passed. I share the same birthmark as she, and, present at my birth, she pronounced some kind of minor prophecy regarding me when she saw the mark. My mother died when I was very young and nobody else took it seriously enough to remember this ‘prophecy’; Grandma herself when she recounted the story seemed to feel telling me her actual words would... not be a good idea.

I have my own variation of her gifts, more like Charm than Voice I would say; nothing special about my dreams when I have them at all, definitely some kind of Sight. But these gifts are not the kind of thing that are controlled or used on purpose, and, at least in my own family, come rarely into our lives. Altogether I have had noticeable access to these gifts perhaps ten times in my 40+ years.

However, I have developed a brand of practical witchcraft that suits me and seems more (not to be dismissive of other folks but) more real than what I was participating in when I was spending time with wiccan flavored witchery. Perhaps an example is in order. Let us consider the Athame, the witch’s blade.

Most of the people I’ve known to have an Athame have had some silly ceremonial decorative thing. Some chrome plated jagged shaped enormous monstrosity, and they only use it ten times a year to salute the 4 directions and ritualistically sacrifice some cheese or whatever.

But witchcraft is old. The OLDEST magic, the FIRST magic -- witching is older than the very concept of a decorative knife. Witchcraft, in my opinion, is a very practical practice.

My own Athame is my chef’s knife.

I use it every day. I know its weight, the feel of it in my hand, I’m skilled with it, I care for it daily, sharpening, cleaning; it feeds me, a part of almost every dinner I eat. If I lost it I would feel as though I lost a part of myself. I can use it to create things that will, for example, win over a romantic partner’s family (let’s be honest, cooking and witchcraft are closely tied together). It is well suited to butchering a small animal, if I was the kind of witch that did animal sacrifice, this is the knife I would use.

This, to me, is a witch’s blade.

The rest of a witch’s tool box is just as practical. Knife, music, wand, chalice, candle, pentacle. Other witch’s tools are basically these same things, much the way a torch is basically a big candle. Mystical as they may seem in a modern setting, these things are, in their purest form, simply the things you would need to be different than an animal, and survive as a human being in the wild.

You have fire (candle). A musical sound (bell is often simplest but plenty of witch kits substitute a flute, or a small drum, or some other simple instrument). A pentacle is little more than a flat work surface, like a cutting board, which is far more rare and valuable than we take it for if you live in the wild. And lets talk about the chalice and wand.

A wand is a stick. Possibly the first multi-purpose tool humans ever regularly used. You can use it to dig tubers. Draw diagrams in the dirt. Stir a stew or poke a fire. It extends your reach when getting fruit from trees or poking into holes for small edible creatures. A spear is, at its base concept, a large wand (the chimpanzees we’ve observed making and using spears are mostly mothers btw). And there are two reasons I suspect one might attach significance to waving a stick around in the air.

1: if you see a group of people talking and gesturing, but one of them is gesturing with some kind of stick, that one is in charge or has some special say in things. Right? I mean obviously there will be exceptions, but that basic observation is pretty true. In this way, it confers an invisible power.

2: if you are entering an old holy place, one that you only enter a few times a year, some kind of cave, or small grove, or temple... I can tell you from experience you’re probably going to want to find a stick and wave it around in front of you, around the entire space. Or you’re going to get that icky startle you feel when you catch a strand of spiderweb to the face. Imagine how that whole process might look to someone who doesn’t know what’s happening.

But there’s something else about a wand. A classic wand will have a pointy end (of obvious use in a variety of situations) and a thicker blunt end. This is not just for grip. That blunt end can combine with the chalice or cup to be a mortar and pestle. Now your wand, knife, chalice and candle are really coming together, because when you are done making whatever it is with the knife and mortar and pestle (probably on the surface of your pentacle) you can hang your chalice over the candle and heat it. This is how a witch might make a medicinal tea, or potion.

Sometimes, one might attach something to the tip of the wand to specialize it, so a wand might have a rounded riverstone that would be a greater pestle. Or it might have a crystal that can make fire from sunlight. Or it might have a gem with a point hard enough to inscribe things on stones. All manner of things. Practical Things, though, is what I’m saying. Things that would have bordered on magic when the first humans had access to these tools.

So that for the tools. But what about Spells?

I don’t know how witching on the internet works. I’m old. But I’m going to tell you how a money spell I’ve used works, and that will give you an insight into my brand of witching and magic maybe. What you do is, you put a container on your altar (you have an altar. No, you DO. It’s either that place your keys and wallet always wind up, or the desk you do your creating at, or the spot next to the stove that’s supposed to be clear space but your cutting board and favorite knife is always there in front of jars of your favorite seasonings even though technically all that stuff has other places they are supposed to be kept. Sadly it might be your TV. These places fill altar functions. Unless you have a specially designated altar somewhere else already, of course) ANYway, you take a container, the bigger it is the stronger the spell but also the more time and effort it will take. Anyway, you put it on your altar. You stand in front of your altar and you make a solemn promise to put every penny you find there, in that container. Only literal penny coins, mind you. You vow to fill it to overflowing. You get an image in your head of what that looks like, and you concentrate on that, and you dedicate yourself to arriving in a universe in which this image is a reality. Basically, by spending time and energy on the promise, you make yourself take it seriously. You decide what you will do with those pennies. Be standing there making your penny collecting vow when you decide on that thing. It must be a whole thing, don’t add them to other money for anything, and don’t spend them on things you already set money aside for regularly; ideally you pair what you are doing with those pennies to concepts of reward and/or sacrifice. So you could vow to take them to a wishing fountain and throw them all in yourself or give them to other people to make wishes, or decide to take them all to a dessert place you like but rarely go to, and spend them on your favorite dessert they have for you or your bestie (fountain or cake, you walk away from spending them without owning anything more than when you started - hence an aspect of sacrifice… eating the pennies as cake or throwing them out as an offering is the same as burning them in a fire in many ways) And - this is important - you think about how money is desirable and vital enough that even the smallest possible increment, the lowly penny, is still worth handling and saving and spending in a planned and disciplined fashion. You THINK about that. Then you go about your life. But as you do so, you pick up and pocket every single penny you see. Pennies are worth so little, that we would often rather dump one in the garbage than pick through the dustpan to save it, but that’s not you anymore. Now, you will cross the street to pick one up out of the gutter if you see one. You’ll still put your change in the tip jar, but you’ll hold back the pennies. The more crazy into this you are, the stronger the spell… top-tier witches doing this spell would wade waist deep in cow poop to acquire a single shit-stained penny. You’re on a mission. You’ve made a promise. And you’re witching. When you get home with these pennies, at some point you’ll put them in the container on your altar. Each time you do, because of how brains work, you’ll be reminded of your promise. You’ll see your vision of overflowing coins again. You’ll imagine how fun the wishing fountain is going to be, or how delicious the cake is going to taste. And - this is important - you’ll think about how money is so desirable and vital that that even the smallest possible increment is worth handling and saving and spending in a planned and disciplined fashion. It may take you weeks to fill the container. It may take you months. But when you are done, when you have completed your vow, dispense the pennies as you planned. Don’t forget to give it extra time here. Look lovingly at the vision you have manifested, at the overflowing container when you have filled it. Feel the weight of it. Count them, roll them, recognize specific pennies that look different, think about pennies you collected in memorable ways. Fill yourself with pride and satisfaction, and carry that feeling with you to the fountain, to the dessert shop. Let your planned activity at that place magnify those feelings, reinforce those feelings. This is the culmination of the spell, the fireball leaving the tip of the wand -- experience the wonder and power of what you have done. See, true witching is, at its heart, extremely practical. It’s just a way for a human being to use intuition to reach truths housed in the dark mystery of our beings that science is only recently able to shed some light on. Things like how wearing clothes you perceive as “tough” will actually make you produce more “tough” chemicals like testosterone and adrenaline (according to studies that measured hormone levels of people switching between wearing leather jackets and pink dresses) or how if you BELIEVE a substance is medication, it can have some curative effects even if it’s just a sugar pill (placebos). Witching is often just working with these realities without access to detailed knowledge of all the science behind it.

Anyhow, when this spell is done, you will see money differently. Your spending habits will be different. You’ll think about money differently. Throwing your change in the tip jar won’t be a mindless activity, and maybe it makes you realize how little you’re actually putting in there and you wind up spending more money on tips than you used to - that’s okay, that’s good, the fact is, the thing you are doing with that money, how you chose to allocate your change from buying a cup of coffee, that is no longer an activity that you don’t really pay attention to; you put thought into it now. Money will have more value, now that not only are you WILLING to pick though dirt for a single cent, but it is actually habit to do so if you see one. Now something is no longer “just a dollar” it is ONE HUNDRED CENTS, and you have a visceral understanding of how much each of those cents is worth to you. And - this is important - you have completed an exercise in money management, wherein you dedicated to a planned expenditure, saved up the necessary funds, and followed through, laying paths in your neural network that take long enough to become habit and end in reward experience (it doesn’t have to be cake, simply completing your plan will give you the reward feelings, like finishing a video game level). You did this without having to change your finances, expenditures, or budget. It was just pennies, it wasn’t like when you try to save for a vacation and the saving is like a new bill you struggle to pay. This fit into your budget like it was nothing. Like it was extra money from nowhere, like it was… magic. The effects will keep spreading, rippling, transforming your life, your RELATIONSHIP with money will have been transformed, in a way too big to fully understand all implications - maybe people see a change in how you are with money and become more likely to trust you with it, more willing to loan you some when you need it. Maybe this will have filled you with ideas for other money management goals and the confidence to see them through and who knows where that will lead you? There is so much mystery and interconnection in this universe, the effects may well be long lasting and incredibly impactful. And that’s how a witch does a money spell. imo. Obviously, if you’ve read the first part of this post, you know I’m not saying this is how all magic works, or that there is no true mystery -- after all, did i not get suddenly taken to a casino for 15 minutes one morning so Grandma could win that poker jackpot with a royal flush in clubs that her late husband told her about in a dream? Clearly there is a great mysticism in the universe. But in my experience, much of the day to day experience of life and magic for a witch is rooted in practical practices.

Now go have fun darlings, and make magic happen

#witching #witchcraft #witch #witchery

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