#courtesy read more

[nicoleiacross]

This. This this this this this a hundred times. "Normal" is a horrible and misleading term that's made life miserable for people.

(Courtesy read more for periods/cycle mentions)

Without going into too many details for the Why/What that lead to this, I preface this by saying I'm turning thirty-five this year.

I've had regular (time-wise) cycles since I was ten or eleven. Heavy and painful, with many of them so debilitatingly painful I've nearly thrown up or have thrown up.

about eight years ago, I found out my body is trying to kill me (again, not going into details) and in an attempt to slow that down, I was put on a ton of medications... which I'd never had to do before.

They always tell you there will be minor side effects while your body adjusts but things will go back to "normal".

For me it was weight gain. I asked, multiple times, if that was a side effect and was told "no" and "try a more active life style/better diet"

I work a very physically demanding job and I eat once a day if I remember. No one asked me any of that.

More importantly it threw my cycle out of whack. I stopped having heavy cycles. The mood swings progressively got worse and I still felt the nausea and cramps from the depths of Hell, but I barely expelled any blood.

I got my first hormone panel three years ago. After finally looking into the medications and realising all of them cause hormone imbalance. (hormones. y'know. one of those things that controls metabolism...and weight control :|)

I told my obgyn (first visit, I'd never needed to go because sex-repulsed ace/no history of female health related medical issues) the myriad of problems I was going through, but those specific to my cycle... ""hormone panel"" was just estrogen.

Results were "normal".

I agreed to an invasive ultrasound (that was done by a trainee with no supervision and i never want to do that again) and despite hearing them mention they did see something, it was attributed to the ongoing illness and marked as benign.

"Normal".

Told my primary six months later, because it was getting worse. Asked for a full hormone panel.

Still only estrogen tested. Still "normal."

Last year I had to fight tooth and nail to get a fucking obgyn appointment because it got so bad. I had to reschedule three fucking times and finally just went to a new doctor who finally fucking listened and did a full panel.

Female hormones were still all "normal". testosterone production, however, was almost three times what it should have been and they finally put me on BC that (hopefully) isn't fucking with any of my other meds.

The only thing it's done is essentially jumpstarted menopause for me. And I don't know what to ask to get help, anymore, because it hasn't helped the cramps. it hasn't helped the nausea. it hasn't helped the mood swings. It just stopped the expulsion of blood.

The point of all this though?

When you know something is wrong and they tell you it's in "acceptable parameters that are normal"? It's normal for an average. It isn't normal, necessarily, for you. Because, usually... if it was... you wouldn't be getting those labs in the first place.

When a chronically ill or disabled person gets their lab tests back as “normal” or all clear, we aren’t sad because we WANT to be sick.

We’re sad because we *know* there’s something wrong with us, yet the scans still stay clear.

Before you kill the monster you gotta know its name.

[royaltea000]

Tolkien elves in hanfu

Hanbok hobbits: https://at.tumblr.com/royaltea000/hanbok-hobbits-elves-in/scol2ingh0d4 

[kindnessoverperfection]

ADHD really does put everything at equal levels of importance, huh? Like I'll have an email I need to write that'll take maybe 10 minutes, and getting that done will alleviate 6 months of stress. Then I'll notice a sock on the floor I need to put away. Then I'll get the strong conviction that it's up to me to cure cancer. And my brain will tell me that I need to do all of them at once, start and finish them all in the time span of 0 seconds, and my executive dysfunction will throw up its hands and do none of the above.

[endwersed]

what happened to just backing out of a fic if it goes a direction you're not a fan of

[queerofthedagger]

everyone write 100 lines of "'creator chose not to use archive warnings' is proper tagging no matter what else is in that fic and if you OPEN a fic tagged as such it's entirely on you whatever you find in there" before going back to any discourse on dark fic and antis i am BEGGING

[applejongho]

just saw another one of those "gif makers ere essential to society" esque posts and it has 18k notes 💀🤘 (8k rbs, 10k likes)

[valtsv]

Have you read From Here to Eternity yet? The discussions of different funerary traditions and ways people deal with grief globally is so fascinating.

not yet, so thank you for the recommendation!

[underwhelmingalchemist]

"I am a mature and responsible adult," I tell myself while spending most of my time here:

[rosesradio]

🕳️

[astrxlfinale]

RULES!

ARE MADE TO BE BROKENNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!

[vbs-kaitos-big-naturals]

you ever feel like your parents dont love you

[fairy-spring]

Of Wolves, Potions, and Goat Cheese - Chapter X.V

Chapter X.V: Companions

Word Count: 948 Summary: While Hyrule Castle is assaulted by a second invasion, Link makes new friends. Notes: I'm so sorry it's been so long since I updated. I attempted to make a full chapter out of the Forest Temple, but I honestly just can't find it in my heart to do. I think it detracts from the pacing, and I don't need it. Given how short this part is, I think it's better to regard it as Chapter 10.5, rather than 11. I hope to post the next chapter soon, though!

Midna was still ignoring him.

From the moment he entered the forest temple, Link had been traveling blind, aided only by his real companion, the little monkey who guided him through Faron's miasma. He decided to finally name the little primate Rose, after the pink flower on her head. The more monkeys he found trapped in the temple, the more grateful he was that she had it to set herself apart in the first place.

It was unusual, though. He saw the bokoblins wandering the temple, and the babas trying to take bites out of him, but he hadn't the faintest idea why monsters native to the forest would feel a need to throw these innocent little monkeys in cages. Did it have something to do with whatever dark power was lurking somewhere in this dead tree? Link vaguely recalled Rose saying something about her “boss” going “funny in the head” while he was stuck in his wolf form. What was her boss, then? A bigger monkey?

At least there was a map of the temple to help Link make his way around the place. The monkey friends he was rescuing along the way certainly helped, too. Yet, as he wandered the deep foliage, he couldn't help but wonder who exactly left this map here? What bold explorer jotted down everything about this place and just... left it behind? Wouldn't maps like this be preserved in fancy books like the ones his mother had? Or...?

Link opened another chest, and there was a rusted compass inside.

Maybe the last guy never left.

The young man took a deep breath as he tried to ignore the thought, marching forward through yet another dark corridor. He relit his lantern and squinted down at the old parchment map. How on earth were there so many paths carved into this massive tree? It was said that the tree housing the temple was once the remains of the forest's guardian deity. Did the spirits of the forest turn their former guardian into a new home, turning a perilous loss into a safe haven? Or, like many things, did new life build itself atop the remains of the Era of Time?

He saw something move out of the corner of his eye, and Link staggered back, the lantern swinging back and forth in his clenched fist.

What was that?

He put the map away, strapped the lantern to his belt, and unsheathed his sword, eyes wide as he scanned the dark room around him. Sure enough, a pot on the ground shook violently, and the boy froze where he stood. Was it yet another baby skulltula? That was the only creature he could imagine would possibly fit in a pot. Dare he strike the pot? Dare he risk it and leave the thing alone?

…

Why was the pot clucking?

How did a cucco get all the way down here? Tentatively, Link put his sword away, and he slowly knelt down and picked up the pot. The second he lifted it off the ground, however, the pot shook once more. Startled, the boy dropped the delicate pot, and it shattered upon impact. The creature that laid within was certainly... unique.

It kind of looked like a cucco, with its stout body and decently sized wings. Its face, however, was too eerily human for him to look in the eye.

“Phew! Out at last!” the bird-person cried out in obvious relief. “Gracious... Once I got in there, I couldn't squeeze back out!” It turned to look at Link, and the young man had to force himself to lock eyes with the thing. The creature either didn't realize, or didn't care for Link's discomfort.

“I must thank you for your help, adventurer!”

“Y-You're welcome,” Link stammered.

Why are the feathers shaped like human breasts this is so uncomfortable—

“I'm an adventurer, myself! Shall we try working together for a while, fellow adventurer?”

Link's cheeks were flushed at the offer, though he didn't know whether it was because of the awkward situation he was in or genuine appreciation for the sentiment.

“That's awful nice, but... You're awful small, n' I don't want ya gettin' hurt here!”

“Oh, nonsense!” the bird-person huffed. “I'm quite capable of handling my own! I could even warp you out of here, should you so desire!”

Warping? That would certainly make for an easy exit after Link got the horrible thing Midna needed oh-so-badly. He doubted she'd help him even after doing that for the terrible imp.

“Alright, alright,” Link sighed, though a small grin crossed his face. Somehow, he was already warming up to the little creature at his feet. He voiced his appreciation as he scooped the cucco-like person into his arms. “What's your name, adventurer?”

“I am Ooccoo, young man. I've searched many years for an object sacred to my people!” Ooccoo flapped her wings with excitement, and she looked up at the blond with her beady red eyes. “Might I have yours?”

“Link.”

Link smiled a tad wider as Ooccoo fluttered to the ground and kept pace with him and Rose. Maybe this journey wouldn't be so bad. He was already making so many helpful friends, unlike the bossy, lazy imp giving him the silent treatment from his shadow. Link probably didn't even need Midna! She only helped him fight off those shadow beasts when he was a wolf, and even then that was only... What? Twice? He didn't need to rely on someone like that, who just expected him to do everything for her without returning the favor.

The second their agreement was done—the second his friends were home safe and sound—he was ditching the imp.

[treeshrine]

gonna be real bud if your fic relies so heavily on intense triggering themes and shock value that you're averse to putting warnings on it to "maintain surprise" and "avoid spoilers", then you act like you did nothing wrong when people are upset that you didn't make any effort to turn them away and allow them to protect themselves, while also telling them it's their fault that they read something that upset them when they could have never known it contained specific things that will upset them, i think you are a tar pit

[ssruis]

Tsukasa Tenma you are such a strange critter… “he liked to strike a pose each time he made a pair” what the fuck is his problem

[onthemerits]

to all those asking "why would anyone write that," i present to you reasons why authors may write "fucked up" things:

they have a scene buzzing around in their head that they need to share

they have something to work through and writing helps them process

they want to make the reader have a visceral emotional response

they want the reader to have to challenge their beliefs

they want the reader to have an OH SHIT moment

they want to share their life experience

they want to share their lived experience and still provide a bit of emotional distance

the scene will add stakes to their story

the scene ties into character development

they enjoy pouring their own fears, disgusts, or bodily experiences into their work

they are haunted with "what-ifs"

they want to imagine what something feels like without experiencing it

they have experienced it but want to rewrite it in a way that reimagines it

they have literally any kind of fucking story to tell!!!

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

hi ari!! i was wondering, do you listening to hozier at all? (i have a feeling you do for some reason but i desperately need to be sure)

anyways i just listened to the new songs and i feel like 'too sweet' is sooo suguru coded... although tbh every single hozier song i listen to belongs to him in my head. do you have some thoughts to spare? <3

HI THEREEE NOE <333 it’s funny that you mention him bc. i’ve been meaning to get into his music!! so far i’ve only listened to like one or two of his songs though 😭 so. yk!! i have a long way to go!!!!

BUTTT TYSM FOR THE REC i just listened to it and i literally love it SO much what a banger….. the instrumental goes so hard and his voice????? insane. the chorus is stuck in my head… don’t even get me started on the lyrics bc they’re so good and they really ARE so sugucoded 😭😭 like!!!!

baby, i can never tell // how do you sleep so well? // you keep tellin' me to live right // to go to bed before the daylight

don’t you just wanna wake up // dark as a lake // smellin' like a bonfire // lost in a haze? // if you're drunk on life, babe // i think it's great // but while in this world

i think i’ll take my whiskey neat // my coffee black and my bed at three // you’re too sweet for me

you know you're bright as the morning // as soft as the rain // pretty as a vine // as sweet as a grape // if you can sit in a barrel // maybe i’ll wait

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 GOD . okay so the first thing that popped into my head was third year sugu…. during his spiral….. when the darkness in his head is growing and you’re still as sweet as ever. and it almost hurts him just to be around you because you really are just too sweet…. too good to him…. to good for him. ”how do you sleep so well? you keep tellin’ me to live right. to go to bed before the daylight”…. :((((( i think he would isolate himself from you because he just doesn’t think you could understand. you’re bright as the morning and soft as the rain and all he can feel is darkness and haze and bonfires…… ”if you’re drunk on life, babe, i think it’s great. but while in this world….” <- THIS specific lyrics made me the most insane i think. it’s Him.

noe your brain is so big now i NEED to listen to more hozier songs 😭😭😭 i genuinely adore this one wowow. the lyrics r gonna be stuck in my head now….. i appreciate you sm 🙏🙏 would LOVE any other hozier recs you have btw…. if you feel like sharing then you know where to find me 👀