#could be interesting money to do as an odd job every now and then though

[autistic-autumn]

Learning to do piano tuning would be cool but every time I look into it I get a heart attack at the sheer absurdity of everything involved.

[mynamesaplant]

Forgiveness is Electric

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Just a little short story about @critterbitter's hc of Emmet, Ingo, and Elesa. This is between the Volume Control and Volume Control (Reprise). Just a tiny change, Emmet caught Tynamo bc I sort of forgot when he did... My bad. Please go take a look at Critter's work, it is beautiful in every sense of the word.

I lied about posting to AO3 last time with Yearning for Wood Floors, but I will update that soon along with this one.

Enjoy!~

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“I do not think she will like those.”

“Who doesn’t love sweets?”

Ingo argued, plucking a box of Snom-Caps and turning it over and over in his hands. He contemplated the choices of candy in the aisle, the teenage clerk puffing their long, purple-streaked hair from their eyes behind the counter as the two children agonized over their decision. The clerk, Dakota, saw Ingo and Emmet in here all the time, the former had something of a sweet tooth and the latter… Well, whatever the opposite of a sweet tooth was, that was Emmet. The kid just loved sour things.

It wasn’t unusual to see them, but it didn’t usually take this long for them to make their selection. They had been there for nearly fifteen minutes, painstakingly reading each and every label and discussing them in hushed undertones. That was unusual by itself. Ingo was not known for his volume control.

Although unusual, they weren’t worried about them doing anything shady like stealing or being careless and knock things off the shelf. Might as well let them go about their business. To pass the time, they watched the fretful newly acquired Tynamo circle around them faster and faster until Emmet snatched the Pokémon deftly from the air and soothingly stroked its back.

“I am Emmet. We do not know what she likes.”

“We must do something! I just feel so dreadful.”

Emmet could see Ingo working himself up over this, just as he had a few hours ago, and Emmet placed a reassuring hand on his brother’s arm. His smile and eyes softened as his twin turned to him, Ingo’s eyes glittering with emotion and whatever proclamation dying on the back of his tongue.

He hadn’t meant it. He really hadn’t. He always got too loud when he was excited.

It had just backfired on him horribly.

Ingo cringed even now as he remembered the tears in her eyes, her hands slapped over her ears, and eyes huge with confusion and pain. She had run off before he could even apologize, and that knowledge was eating him alive all day.

Candy wouldn’t fix this. In his heart of hearts, he knew that, and maybe he had come here to grab himself some of his favorite snacks to ease the pain of losing a potential friend.

It was hard for them to understand others. Emmet and Ingo were so in-sync with each other that everyone seemed to be moving so much slower by comparison. It was like playing charades with someone who was underwater, the twins made perfect sense to one another, but it was unclear to everyone else.

This was not new to them, but it didn’t make it any less frustrating.

With their moms being busy with work and their uncle who didn’t have much interest with them most times, Emmet and Ingo came to rely on each other almost exclusively. Drayden would give them a little bit of pocket change, but never much. They had to be ultraconservative with what he gave them and had taken it upon themselves to run around Anville Town to take little odd jobs.

Leaves to rake? Oran berries to pick? Snow to shovel?

Emmet and Ingo did it all and saved what they could. They barely scraped together the money to purchase the Pokéballs needed to catch Tynamo and for additional balls to try and catch Ingo a starter.

Even though they knew everyone, they weren’t really close to anyone in town.

That could have been different if Ingo hadn’t ruined everything!

“Perhaps sweets are not the solution…”

Ingo finally admitted, setting the box down and rising to his feet. Readjusting his cap on his head and dusting off his knees to unconsciously tidy his appearance, Ingo’s frown deepened in thought. Even if he and Emmet apologized to her, Miss Elesa would not understand them. Drat! If only he had remembered her hearing aids, he had completely forgotten them tucked behind her black hair.

Emmet watched his face scrunch up, clearly having a long inner dialogue with himself where he alternatively berated himself and told himself that there was no crying over spilled milk. Gray eyes scanning the shelf, he took a bag of sour gummy-Bewear for himself, and chocolate covered pretzels for his brother, before hauling them to the counter where Dakota waited.

Tynamo drifted just below his elbow, still quite nervous around new people and often retreating to its ball when too anxious. Emmet’s soft encouragement was the only thing keeping the EleFish out while Dakota rang up both bags.

“Tynamo? Good for you, kiddo. I hear they’re not easy to catch.”

They rested their elbows on the counter, chin resting atop with a kind smile to the quieter twin. Dakota could see him beaming with pride, but he merely nodded, shuffling on the spot while he fished in the pocket of his overalls for some money. His Tynamo, like its trainer, seemed a little bashful at their words, and retreated into its ball.

“200… I think you brother is comatose over there.”

Dakota said not unkindly. Emmet jerked his head to where his brother stood motionless in front of the candy.

“Ingo!”

It was Ingo’s turn to jerk out of his, as Dakota had put it, “comatose state”. He trotted over to his side, staring at the bags of candies with confusion before it all seemed to click into place.

“You did not have to spend your pocket money on me.”

Emmet’s smile softened at the bashful note in his sibling’s voice. He wanted to. Ingo was feeling down, his twin often overthinking problems and burning himself out in the process. Emmet liked to take a step back to listen and reflect on people and conversations. A little break would do Ingo some good, so he insisted on the treats.

“I am Emmet. I wanted to. Yup!”

While Dakota bagged their treats in a small brown paper bag, they couldn’t help but lean over the counter to examine them. Although many people didn’t understand the secret code that the twins exchanged between glances, mouth twitches, and hand movements, Dakota could tell something was awry. Withholding the bag, they leaned over the counter with a faintly curious expression and a light tone.

“You guys alright?”

Unsurprisingly, the two exchanged looks, and a wordless conversation was held between them while Dakota waited. It was Ingo who swiveled his head back to face them, his face knit into a calculating grimace that seemed a little less friendly than usual, but only marginally.

“Yes,” he said slowly, eyes not breaking with the clerk, but they could see him shifting uncomfortably. “Emmet and I are attempting to right a wrong. However, we are encountering several roadblocks.”

There is a pause. Dakota still held the bag just out of reach as they gnawed on their lower lip. This wasn’t really their business, and they weren’t the type to stick their nose in where it didn’t belong… They thought of Drayden, who spent a lot of time in Opelucid and not watching his nephews – he barely spent any time with them.

They’re just kids.

“Do you need some help? It’s my job to help customers in the store y’know.”

Another pause. Another exchange of glances.

“I-” Ingo tries to being, already hard pressed to say anything and even less so when his sibling elbowed him in the ribs and shot him a look. He wouldn’t be allowed to take all the blame. “We upset one of our classmates with our carelessness. We think she was attempting to befriend us, but- uh… there were a few errors on our part.”

“And you’re trying to get candy for her to forgive you?”

“We thought about it, but it grew too complicated. We do not know what candy she likes, but more importantly, we do not think it’s a suitable apology.”

The clerk nodded, tapping the counter in thought as they tried to piece together some genuine advice for the boys.

“I think it’s a nice peace offering, but I think an apology would be better.”

“We broke her hearing aids… Yep…”

Emmet croaked suddenly, shrinking back in shame at the same time that Ingo grabbed the brim of his hat to tug it lower over his eyes.

“Ah,” Dakota hummed, tapping the counter even faster. They meant the new family that moved in from Sinnoh. They remembered their dads talking about the new signs that had to go all over town for the girl’s safety. Dakota couldn’t remember her name. “How did you break them?” They asked, already knowing the answer.

“Volume control.”

Ingo cringed, remembering his uncle’s warning about his naturally loud voice. Inside voice, Drayden had been emphasizing, and Ingo was trying to take those words to heart, but it was difficult. Since Ingo’s face didn’t emote well, he relied on his voice and his movement to articulate his emotions to others. They nod sympathetically.

“You didn’t see them?”

“No…”

The boy was squirming now, his shame and embarrassment with the situation reaching an all-time high. He felt Emmet moving to his side, reassuringly pressing against his arm, and resting his head on his twin’s shoulder. A flood of comfort helped Ingo release a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding.

Behind the counter, the clerk was rummaging through something – although tall for their age, Emmet and Ingo couldn’t see what they were doing. They heaved a box onto the counter, tipping it so the contents spilled out for them to see, and the boys were confused.

“Headphones?”

Emmet leaned forward on his tiptoes to look at the colorful array of boxes that ranged from normal headphones to ones that had Pikachu and Eevee ears topping them.

“Yeah, uh, maybe if she wears these, you’ll remember right away that she has headphones in.”

It was a half-baked idea. In truth, Dakota felt a bit sheepish about it now that the idea was out of their head, but when they looked up, the boys were beaming – well, Emmet beamed. Ingo reminded of them of their friend’s Purrloin in a way they couldn’t quite put their finger on.

“Bravo! What a marvelous suggestion!”

Ingo practically cheered, stepping beside Emmet to look through the headphones. It was probably going to cost them a bit from the tags on the boxes, but it would be worth it. The headphones would immediately remind Ingo that she had hearing aids in so he would be more inclined to get Miss Elesa’s attention in a different fashion, but it also might do the same for others who were unaware of her deafness.

“Sure – er, thank you…” Dakota was looking at the prices now and mentally smacked their forehead. They probably couldn’t afford the headphones. “I’ll-” They hesitate. It almost pained them to say what they were going to next. “I’ll pay for them so you can take them to her now.” The twins’ eyes went wide, both about to protest when Dakota interrupted, “In exchange, you can do a few chores for me at my place. I need to do some yardwork, but it always gives me hay fever. Sound like a deal?”

The answer was easy for them. Dakota told them to pick ones that they thought Miss Elesa would like.

“I think these ones are quite dashing.”

Ingo said, picking up the box with the Pikachu ears. Emmet pursed his lips and shook his head.

“Nope. Too big. Not a gamer girl.”

They continued to rummage through the boxes. They agreed that she must like Electric types. She had a Blitzle as her partner after all.

“I cannot recall, she is from Hoenn, correct?”

Emmet shrugged, unsure himself because they had both been looking through a magazine with an expose on the newest train lines running out of Nimbasa when she had been introduced. That just meant to them that, when the time came, going on their Pokémon journey by rail would be all the easier.

“Not sure.” He looked at the box Ingo had in his hand and his smile broadened, nodding in agreement to his brother’s unasked query. The perfect balance of subtle but stylish. “I am Emmet. Those are perfect.”

Plusle and Minun headphones.

[darkshelbyfiction]

Personal Whore (Kink Series)

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Female Reader

Summary: This Series will explore different fetishes including an innocence kink, somnophilia, anal play, watersports, bdsm, marking, edging, and anything else you would like me to include!

In this series, you are Thomas Shelby's maid. You are innocent and shy. This is your first job. Thomas Shelby takes an interest in you and pays you to become his personal whore. He makes you have sex with him in exchange of money, every day, using perverse techniques to satisfy his needs.

PART ONE: ORAL SKILLS

"You have been working for me for two weeks now Love and you recently turned 18, right?" Thomas questioned and you nodded timidly, nervous about what might come next.

"I... yes sir," you whispered softly, averting your gaze slightly out of shyness. The room seemed impossibly large and dimly lit, accented only by the flickering candlelight reflecting off the pristine white sheets upon the bed.

"Very well, that means that you are of legal age for my proposition." His voice dripped honeyed promises.

"Now let me ask you, Love... Do you know what some of the other maids here do for me in order to earn some more money?" your employer asked quietly, watching you closely.

"They perform various tasks, sir," you answered hesitantly, trying not to imagine where he could be going with this conversation.

"That's right," he said before looking at you with even more intensity in his gaze. "And do you know what these tasks entail?"

He asked, leaning closer, his proximity sending waves of anxiety through your body.

"Well," you began cautiously, choosing your words carefully. "Sarah said that, occasionally, she would touch you down there," you blushed, feeling mortified at having revealed such intimate information, albeit indirectly. You noticed a flash of excitement in his eyes when mentioning sensitive areas—a sign that perhaps this wasn't all just talk?

Thomas nodded thoughtfully, his expression unreadable as he processed your response. Then he rose gracefully from his seat, moving deliberately toward you like a predator closing in on its prey. It felt odd being so close to someone with whom you had worked for almost two months without any physical contact beyond casual banter.

"She occasionally touches me, yes," replied Thomas, maintaining eye contact. "But it isn't always required – merely desired. So I wonder, my dear, how far would you go for some extra compensation?" He smirked subtly, inviting himself deeper into the territory where you were reluctant to venture.

The heat of the moment caused you to feel flustered and uncertain as you attempted to gauge the severity of Thomas' intentions. Your heart raced faster than ever before, threatening to escape your chest as sweat glistened lightly along your brow.

"You want me to touch your pe..., uhm, you know...down there..." your voice trailed off, unable to find the courage to say the word 'penis'. Thomas smiled reassuringly, appreciating your discomfort as he realized you hadn't quite grasped the extent of his proposal.

"Yes, sweetheart. I want you to touch my cock and, maybe, one day, you will even take it in to your mouth or let me put it into your pussy, eh," Thomas stated confidently while running his hand across your cheek, causing involuntary shivers to run up your spine.

Your face colored deeply with embarrassment, though it also held an undeniable hint of curiosity. While your desire to please and satisfy your newfound benefactor burned intensely, something inside you screamed that taking things further than simple caresses went too far - yet another layer of turmoil added to the complex relationship unfolding between you both.

Having sensed your inner conflict, Thomas chose to approach the subject tactically.

Slowly, tenderly brushing aside a lock of your hair, he asked: "How does that make you feel, sweetheart?" His tone betrayed no judgement or impatience, instead offering understanding and acceptance. "Do you think you can handle that sort of responsibility?"

You trembled underneath his gentle ministrations, torn between fear and arousal, struggling to process your rapidly evolving feelings towards your once strictly professional superior.

"I never even seen a man's private parts before, sir. I was saving myself for marriage, but some extra cash would sound nice too," Your statement came out as a quiet plea for guidance, a confession of ignorance that exposed your vulnerability.

"Well, for what it's worth, no one would ever find out, Love. Not even your future husband," Thomas said and there was a sinister edge to his tone.

"I know that you are a good catholic girl, but sometimes it is worth doing bad things for the right incentive, wouldn't you agree?" Thomas said before he decided to lay bare his plans for you. "So, listen very carefully. If you agree to carry out these tasks, then I promise you that I will give you double your usual wages for the duration of your employment. In addition, I will give you £500 for your virginity and loyalty. How does that strike you?"

Stunned and bewildered, you stared at him in disbelief. Double your pay for doing things you didn't understand fully and parting ways with your cherished purity – your whole world suddenly seemed to spin wildly out of control. Yet despite the magnitude of the choices facing you, one thing remained clear: continuing as your present self would lead to financial ruin.

With tears swelling in your eyes, you found yourself considering Thomas' offer, wondering whether surrendering everything you believed in truly amounted to nothing less than selling your soul. Still, it was difficult to resist the lure of instant prosperity, particularly given the dire straits you faced otherwise. As you struggled internally, Thomas watched patiently, waiting for you to decide. Finally, with a heavy heart, you made your decision.

Nodding solemnly, you declared, "Alright, Mr. Shelby, I agree, but I need you to triple my wages and add another £500 for my virtue."

With an approving smile curling at the corner of his lips, Thomas conceded, "Agreed. I will triple your wages and pay you a lump sum of £1,000 for your precious purity," your employer said before unbuckling his belt without bothering to remove the rest of his clothes.

"Understandably, you may need time to become comfortable enough to execute these duties adequately, so I shall start you off slowly," Thomas explained calmly before unzipping his pants and thereby exposing his erect member. Despite your reservations, you couldn't help but notice the size and firmness of his cock as he pushed down his pants halfway. 

"It doesn't look so scary, does it, Love?" he murmured, his voice holding an undercurrent of amusement, attempting to ease your apprehension as he reached for your hand, guiding it tentatively towards his penis. With an anxious breath, you followed his instruction, marveling at the weightiness of his organ, still unsure of exactly what he expected from you.

As your fingers traced delicate patterns over his length, you discovered small nubs on the underside, eliciting a deep groan from him. Uncertain about your progress thus far, you glanced upwards briefly to catch sight of his reaction, finding satisfaction etched upon his features.

"See, Love, we're making headway already," Thomas commented gently, encouraging you with warmth.

Despite your lingering apprehensions, the confidence exuded by your master proved infectious, allowing you to relax somewhat and follow the path laid out before you.

Inch by inch, your exploration continued until you encountered the tiny knobbiness located near the base of his organ. Upon stimulating it, Thomas' moans grew louder, confirming your suspicion that you had struck gold.

Encouraged by this success, you bravely moved onto his sacrum, discovering that a soft ticklish patch accompanied it. Smiling sheepishly, you proceeded to explore the area thoroughly. After satisfying yourself with a leisurely tour, you finally turned your attention back to the main event – his impressively throbbing phallus.

Feeling emboldened, you took hold of the tip, applying a slight pressure that resulted in a low grumble emitting from Thomas.

Taking hold of your hand again, he positioned it correctly, demonstrating proper technique. Encouraged by his expertise, you mirrored his movements and gradually increased the strength of your strokes, matching his fervent pace.

"That's it, love! Keep going!" he urged, his hands now wrapped tightly around yours before making a somewhat unusual request.

"How do you feel about taking my cock into your mouth, Love?" Thomas whispered huskily, watching your every move closely.

"You want me to do what?" you asked, still feeling uneasy about performing such acts. The mere idea sent waves of nervousness coursing through your body, prompting your limbs to quiver.

"I want you to practice sucking my cock, Love," Thomas insisted matter-of-factly, a commanding authority evident in his tone.

Swallowing hard, you hesitated for a brief moment before asking timidly, "Like a lollipop?" 

"No, not like a lollipop, Love," Thomas replied, his words filled with amused indulgence. "Just wrap your lips around the head first and start by licking off my pre-cum. Trust me, it won't be as terrible as you might imagine."

His assurance did little to alleviate your anxiety, but nonetheless, you nodded obediently.

Gingerly, you took his thick shaft into your small hands, immediately experiencing a strange mixture of revulsion and fascination.

Carefully lowering your head, you pressed your tongue to the engorged head, savoring the salty taste of his precum.

"There you go, sweetheart. Lick around the ridge just above the hole," Thomas instructed you kindly, clearly aware of how intimidated you were feeling.

"That's a good girl," he told you and, just as you obeyed his directive, your fingers simultaneously worked to stroke the entire length of his impressive manhood.

"Now take me in your mouth, sweetheart. As far as you can," Thomas commanded authoritatively, his voice full of raw demand as, with trembling fingers, you complied, opening wide to accommodate his girth.

"Beautiful," Thomas breathed, appreciating your attempt before holding onto your hair and pulling slightly to guide your mouth deeper down on his erection.

As your lips grazed the sensitive skin beneath his glans, a wave of dizziness assaulted you, leaving you gasping as you tried to regulate your breathing.

"There you have it, sweetheart, take it all," Thomas directed firmly, pressing your mouth harder against him. Gulping reflexively, you felt the foreign object filling your mouth, causing your cheeks to bulge comically.

"I will fuck your throat now," Thomas muttered roughly, thrusting himself further into your open mouth, causing you to gag involuntarily. Your eyes watered with the unexpected intensity of sensation. But even amidst the choking panic, something inside you recognized an undeniable thrill.

Thomas held you firmly in place, ensuring you maintained eye contact throughout the experience. As your struggle to maintain control intensified, so did his aggressiveness.

"Good girl," he growled approvingly when you managed to adapt quickly, albeit tears streaming down your face and saliva dripping from your chin.

His cock now nestled comfortably within your tender throat, Thomas began moving faster, building momentum. His touch became more forceful as you submitted to his demands blindly, consumed by newfound passion.

"Do you know what happens to a man when he orgasms, Love?" Thomas asked teasingly, raising an eyebrow playfully as he continued to use your mouth and throat for your pleasure. 

Confusion crossed your face, unable to discern the meaning behind his inquiry as you shook your head.

"Well, when I cum, seed will spill out from my cock right into your eager mouth," Thomas clarified casually while fondling your wet cheek. "Are you ready for that?"

Your brow furrowed, processing the implications of his statement. It dawned on you that your role as his sexual submissive required complete submission, including receiving the ultimate release from your employer.

You nodded silently, acknowledging your willingness to accept whatever fate awaited you. And as Thomas' hips started bucking violently, indicating his imminent climax, you steeled yourself, preparing for the inevitable outcome.

"Good girl. I want you to swallow my load completely," Thomas ordered, his voice rough with anticipation as he thrusted in and out of your throat. Without question, you opened wider, bracing yourself for the sudden explosion. As Thomas' hips jerked forward, releasing a torrent of hot semen directly into your gaping mouth, you could barely contain your shock. The searing liquid burned your throat, stinging fiercely, but you endured, determined to satisfy your master. Consequently, Thomas let loose a powerful roar, his muscles tensing powerfully, as his body convulsed in ecstasy.

Pulling away from your tender mouth after the volley was spent, he looked deeply into your eyes, searching for any signs of resistance or regret. Finding none, a satisfied smirk formed across his lips. "Very good indeed, Love. Now open your mouth and show me your tongue once again," commanded Thomas, placing one palm on either side of your face. Submissively, you parted your lips to expose your reddened tongue, waiting patiently for further orders. "Keep practicing, because soon you'll be giving me blowjobs regularly until, in two weeks or so, I will fuck this virgin pussy of yours," he informed you confidently, running his finger along your neck, arousal evident in his gaze.

Understanding implicitly that your services would extend beyond the confines of today's encounter, you silently accepted your fate without protest.

After all, despite the humiliation and unfamiliar experiences you underwent, there remained an inexplicable allure. Something about submitting entirely to the desires of another piqued an unidentifiable desire deep within you, stirring feelings that seemed almost forbidden. In time, perhaps these indistinct yearnings could evolve into something concrete and tangible. For now, however, you must focus solely on perfecting your skills as Thomas' personal pleasure provider and you soon learned that his requests are more than just a little unusual. 

[acesw]

The Grecos, Schneider, and her Religious Trauma

One of the characters I really find interesting is Schneider. There are strong signs that she has religious trauma, which ties really well with the neglect she's experienced growing up and the way this trauma reflects her behaviors and words.

The Grecos are known to be really religious, and they're quite devout to Christianity as a means of life. It does not mean that they wouldn't do things to ensure that they're able to at least eat. Living in Chicago of all places is already one struggle enough, making sure they get by despite having bad relationships with gangs adds so much.

Prior to moving, they were more devoted to God as coming from a community in Sicily. They moved because of how bad the poverty situation had been (the major Italian emigration in the 1900-1910s), hoping to seek a better life in America. Of all places though, they moved to Chicago, where there were crimes and gangs all about. This resulted to the Grecos having to pull strings to keep their head up the water, and they still practice Christianity as a means to maintain morale.

We then have Schneider. The youngest and most neglected child of the Grecos. She was barely fed and paid attention to among her 11 older sisters. The Narrator also notes that she was even neglected from the start, as she turned a year old before her father realized she wasn't baptized.

Now, there are two main instances that showcase Schneider's religious trauma peeking through are the traces "From One Castle to Another" and "Long Night Trip". Both of which are very much talking about Schneider's past. There are parts of the dialogue that stick out to me.

-From One Castle to Another

"It's impossible to keep every child well-fed. Schneider could not even get a piece of bread in the Eucharist. But a good daughter would not let anyone worry about her. She sat on the bench outside the church and hummed. She found a way out for herself."

"The Grecos are among them. They're covered by the dark cloud of long-handed umbrellas. [...] But you can't find Schneider. [...] It rains heavier. The priest opens his arms to embrace the sky, 'The Lord be with you.' " " 'And also with you.' Schneider responds in a voice that could hardly be heard. She puts her hand on her heart. This is the first time she responds to the Lord. And it will be the last."

-Long Night Trip

The Narrator talks about Schneider's slow descent into losing her faith in these conversations. She used to pray and hope that God would fix things and give an answer for her and her family's suffering. And all that happened was that it got worse.

It only ever makes Schneider question and doubt, and eventually she stops believing in God. But everyone around her, her family in particular, still maintains their strong belief that he'd guide them out of struggle. Meanwhile, she take things into her own hands for that matter.

And again, everyone would resort to praying, praying, and praying. Yet Schneider wouldn't dare try. Because if he listened to her this one time then they heard all the other times and never cared to help. That rubs salt in the wound.

So with this, we see how Schneider creates her newfound identity. She starts frequenting underground markets and doing certain odd jobs. She is able to make amends with other gang leaders and grow her own strong faction in Chicago.

All so she makes enough money for the rest of her family to eat and thrive. It showcases her sense of selflessness, her full care for her family despite how they treated her. She cares for them more than anything, because even with barely receiving love, they're the ones that raised her. Schneider actively does it all to prove that she can give.

Even in the main story there are those hints of that trauma seeping through. Throughout the game she refers to her bosses as "My Lord", a name that's usually reserved for God.

In the 'Green Oranges' segment of chapter 2, we see that Schneider's younger self describes America as a new world. A place of wonders, where blessings will be given and all sins will be forgiven. There, "God loves the world". Because back in Sicily, she believes that God does not love her and her family here. This ties back to the major Italian emigration in the 1900-1910s, where again, the poverty situation had been so bad. Not to mention the overpopulation and the natural disasters that came with it.

Meanwhile, her adult self is heavily injured from the gunshot wounds and Vertin stops shooting her. She expresses her frustration of being unable to die fast, which then turns to this: "Or did God finally forgive me...He allowed me...to stay alive!!"

"God would never make or guide one to that first action," Schneider thinks, because only she alone did it. She decided to step in, with no guidance of the God she once loved. The God that never forgave her.

The entirety of chapter 1 and 2 shows that her trauma runs really deep. The youngest and most neglected child turns into the most diligent and faithless Greco. She expresses her clear disdain for God, and does everything in her own power to do what "he never did for her and her family."

[itsthesinbin]

Sins in Stardust (Bill Cipher/Reader)

OKAY SO. I've been thinking of Ideas since I got HORRIFICALLY fixated on Bill/Gravity Falls. I still do like the "bill's hot wife" idea but I gotta think abt how that wld work, logistically. I can't get off if the plot doesn't make sense. BUT I do have. Another reader insert idea.

Post Weirdmageddon and technically post Book of Bill. I couldn't read the full book in detail bc all I had was a kinda blurry pdf to work with so I'm missing some details.

This is the first chapter just 2 kinda gauge interest. I'm only posting it here rn until I write out a couple more :3 Feel free to leave a reply or tag if u reblog to let me know what u think

EDIT: Came up with a title I liked :3 I need to stop crutching on Hozier song titles LMAO

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You missed camping- you and your parents went at least once every summer, when you were a kid. A good old cross-country camping trip is what you needed, after the multitude of bullshit you’ve gone through. You quit your job, sold whatever shit you didn’t need and used the money you had to get out of your home as fast as you could. You’ll find a new place to settle, a new job in a new city with new neighbors and never have to worry again. All you had to worry about, now, is finding a fun spot to camp for the night.

You could sleep in your car- you have a few times since you started your trip- but it was a gorgeous night. The moon was full, the stars were so bright and clear this far out from a major city… It’d be a waste. You pulled your car off the road and trekked a bit out into the woods nearby. Hopefully your car would still be there in the morning. Please, God, let it be there in the morning.

You entered into a small break in the trees. The late spring breeze made the leaves sway and branches rattle softly. The starlight caught on the toadstools odd triangular spots. Eye-shaped spots on the trees seemed to follow you as you stepped into the small field. Like looking at creepy paintings in a haunted house, you felt like you were being watched. It was a little creepy, but you chalked it up to the full moon. Everyone was on edge during a full moon just because of stories and superstitions they all heard growing up.

The brightest thing in the clearing was a small statue, half buried in the ground. A triangle with a large eye, tophat, and bowtie. A single arm stuck out, as if ready for a handshake. The stone itself seemed to glow, but you chalked that up to the brightness of the moonlight that filtered through the canopy. You stepped a bit closer, noting how… quiet the area was. No birds, no crickets… Nothing. It was a little unsettling, you wouldn’t lie. Quiet woods never led to anything good. You really should go back to your car.

You pulled out your phone, first, though. You had to get a picture of this funky little guy. You were probably overthinking things. The statue was probably just someone’s abandoned art project, or store mascot, you thought as you snapped a few pictures of the lichen-covered statue. You smiled slightly. The little thing was kinda charming.

You decided to put your tent up anyway, despite the eerie silence. It was late, you were tired, and your car was still close enough to this clearing that you’d probably be in “danger” anyway. If you even were actually in trouble. The silence and the eye-spots on the trees were unsettling, sure. Weirdly enough, though, you felt a sense of calm here.

You decided against setting up a fire, opting to eat a can of cold pork’n’beans for dinner as you looked up at the stars. The sky was alight with blues and pinks and purples, seemingly swirling nebulas catching the attention of any being capable of comprehending beauty. You felt yourself smiling to yourself.

“Beautiful night, huh li’l guy?” You joked to the statue. You missed the way the eye-spots on the trees had stopped following you, instead focusing on the night sky. You threw the empty can of beans into a bag to throw away tomorrow, before rolling out your sleeping bag and laying out under the stars. You crossed your arms behind your head, and one foot over the other. Obviously, you were met with the same silence that had been here. Humans would be humans, though. Bonding with anything that even remotely had a face.

“Bet it gets lonely, stuck out here. Sure you got the view, but it sounds like nothing really drops by.” Nothing. The stars above almost seemed to move. You could almost make a shape out, but as soon as you tried it seemed to dissipate. You hummed to yourself, trying to find the shape again.

“I know how it feels to be stuck, buddy,” you offered, sympathetically. You sighed as a heavy feeling settled on your chest. You shook away the bad memories, the stars seeming to move again to keep your attention. It was getting a little weird, now. But you had heard that Gravity Falls was a pocket of weirdness in the middle of nowhere.

“I could use a traveling buddy,” you laughed. “I haven’t had… a friend in a long time…” You trailed off as the stars continued to twinkle and dance. You sat up with a heavy sigh, face to face with the statue again. Unsurprisingly, he stared at you stoically with his hand still poised for a handshake. You put your chin in your hand.

“And it’s driven me so crazy I’m talking to an old ARG piece left in the woods…” You rubbed your face. You stood with a stretch, the light around you seemingly getting a little brighter. You stepped in front of the statue.

“They use us and leave us to rot, don’t they? Hardly fair,” you mumble. You reach a hand out as if to grab its hand, but stop short of actually touching it. The hair on the back of your neck stood as you felt a million eyes on you at once. You look behind you, only to be met with the trees. You look up, and find the stars once again in the vague shape you couldn’t make out before. It felt like the very universe was watching this moment. Your throat felt tight. Strangely, though, you didn’t feel scared. You looked back at the waiting statue. Something prodded at the back of your mind.

“Maybe I will take you with me. Once I get settled somewhere, you can become a piece in my next living room,” you smiled. “I’ll get you cleaned up and see if I can patch some of those chips and cracks.”

You hesitated a moment, before you grasped the statue’s hand. Obviously, the stone limb didn’t actually move.

“I’ll get you out of here, you be my travel partner, and we both get to be free for a while. How’s that sound?” No response. Not that you expected one. You let the little hand go with a yawn. You kicked your shoes off near your sleeping bag and lay back down on it. The stars finally stopped shifting and swirling. They twinkled down at you as you covered yourself up for the night. You didn’t think it’d rain, so sleeping outside should be fine. You’ll deal with whatever happens, if anything.

You dreamt of the stars that night. They swirled above you, forming into a large creature that swam its way to you. You floated among the stars, eyes wide with wonder at the smiling creature. Its tail swept along the empty space beside you, leaving a small… child? It was a triangle with a huge eye, like the statue in the woods, but had giant shoes. It didn’t look at you at first, instead staring at the creature made of starlight and space dust in front of you. You also turned your gaze back to it.

The Axolotl stared down at you two, a peaceful smile on its face. You felt small under its gaze- like a child looking up at their parent. You reached out to pat it on the nose, finding your hand smaller than usual. You heard a squeaking noise and turned to look at the triangular baby.

“You see the stars too?” You didn’t know how he asked without a mouth, but you nodded anyway. Your 5 year old face was reflected in his large eye. He held a hand out for you to hold.

“You wanna watch them together?” You were quiet. You turned back to the Axolotl, only to find it swimming away from you. Back to depths of the universe you could only imagine. With no other option, you looked back at the kid next to you. His eye was turned up to show that he’d be smiling, if he had a mouth. His eye crinkled more as you grabbed his hand.

The stars began to burn.

You woke with a start, finding the sun creeping over the tree canopy and shining down on you. You groaned and covered your eyes with your forearm. You forced yourself to sit up, rubbing your eyes with your hand. Your head was pounding, the strange dream leaving you in a cold sweat. Maybe you shouldn’t have slept here.

A groan from in front of you made you freeze. Your head snapped up, making it throb. A triangular creature was sitting where the statue used to be, stone splintered and sprinkled around him. He massaged his singular eye, muttering under his breath. He looked up, tensing when he saw you. You both sat there in stunned silence for what felt like forever.

Then you both screamed.

[puripurin]

Yan! Llama Hybrid x SheepHybrid! Reader

— Recently, on the farm, a bunch of coyotes and wolves started to snag some sheep hybrids into the woods when they would get too close to the fences. It has gotten so bad that they would do it in broad daylight.

The owners decided that they would introduce a new addition to the herd to combat the coyotes. A male Llama named Lumi. All of the sheep were skeptical at first because they all thought that it was a little odd that the new sheep would have such a long neck and a lot bigger in size, but soon enough, they couldn't help but warm up to him.

Lumi, on the other hand, was still in his awkward phase. He'd recently entered into adulthood and was feeling sad and lonely without his parents there to guide him, but it wasn't until he saw your gorgeous curls and your small little tail that wagged in excitement. Just in that moment, he'd decided to be your life-long mate and started the process of courting you.

You did not give a shit about Lumi. You only cared about the coyotes that ate the rest of the flock. You wanted to start making sacrifices to grow your cult of small critters such as squirrels and rabbits.

This was because you heard from a passing by sheep hybrid that was being transported to another farm about how you could obtain everything you wanted if people devoted their lives to you.

However, you didn't expect Lumi to be so dedicated to you that he'd easily deciphered your messages to your devout followers and your weekly gatherings.

As you walked out of the dead of night, with the intention of killing a coyote that night. But it was oddly still, as if it was waiting for something. The trees didn't ruffle against each other, and the cool wind was nowhere to be seen

You stiffened up and silently walked back. If one of the other sheeps found out about this whole cult thing you had going on, you'd be ousted and killed by the coyotes instead.

But, you were immediately thrown down and turned over. Your eyes widened in panic and started to attack the person who held you down silently, only to realize that blood was dripping on your face.

"My love, I've killed one of those tainted and unpure coyotes for your sacrifice. I would hate to see your delicate hands get stained with something unworthy of your desire... but why... Why do you yearn and look at someone else with interest other than me? ... Only I shall be your eyes and ears, my love..."

Random and barely edit post after months of not posting. I was watch yt shorts and i came across a video abt guard llamas w sheeps. Its been on my mind for 3 weeks and i started this 2 weeks ago. I only decided now to finish it.

You can see the point where i went fuck it because i had no idea what to do with the reader's background so i was like "Ooh maybe they want to smash the coyotes... what's close to smashing coyotes... Cult." Cult leader YN it is.

Anyways below is for the rest of people who want to know what happened after that incident.

I feel better about my dog's death, but we weren't able to get him back due to the poor weather and the fact he was last seen in a drain. So there wasn't a proper burial, but I'm happy that we didn't end up with 2 losses. We had them since they were puppies, and its upsetting that the younger one died, but i understand why they had to kill him.

He's a dangerous breed of dog even though he's docile most of them time. He was a cane corso, and my older dog is a rottweiler and pitbull mix. So not the most safest dogs to be around, but what are you gonna do when your country is busy locking up a man for money laundering bcs they shit at their jobs.

Right, if I'm not lazy enough, I'll go back and redo every one of my ocs bcs im on the verge of deleting them all from embarrassment. Then that will hopefully be a small week long event for my tumblr as im not used to those things. But this might take months.

Also, no won't do kinktober, im lazy, and smut isn't my forte. Anyways bye-bye, see yall when my coffin feels too stuffy~

(soz if this is shit as well bcs i didn't do a whole lotta explaining abt Lumi's behavior)

[kpop---scenarios]

Hidden Lies (1)

Pairing: Unknown x Reader

Warning: Violence, Crime, Almost Assault

Word Count: 4.9k

A/N: This is a remake of Poisonous Lies. Some parts may be familiar, and that would be why. I hope you enjoy!! Let me know who you think she'll connect more with!

This morning you woke up, listening to the sounds of birds chirping, the sun shining through your window, and feeling like it was going to be a great day. 

“YN.” Your mom yells. It was too early and you were trying to wake up peacefully. “Y/N!” She calls out again, but this time it's more of a screech. 

You groan loudly, folding your pillow over your ears, wanting to enjoy a little bit of time without her yelling at you. The sound of her shrieking voice was coming closer every second, until it was practically right in your ear. 

Your eyes are still closed as you feel your blanket being ripped off your body, your mom cursing at you. 

“Wake the fuck up!” She yells. “Don't you hear me yelling for you? I have shit to do, I cannot keep waking you up in the mornings! damn, you're going to make us both late” 

You were 22 years old and you still live with your mother. This life you had was sad, although it was your fault. This technically was your choice. You had decided to drop out of school and go home to help your mom out after your dad was sentenced to 10 years in prison for a lengthy list of crimes, although well it wasn't his fault, it also was at the same time. 

Your father had lost his job, and instead of telling your mother and them trying to figure it out, he went and got a loan from some people involved in crime that he most definitely should have not gone to. He didn't think about the fact that he would have had to pay that money back, plus interest. And when the time came for them to collect he didn't have it. So he was recruited for odd jobs until he had paid everything back, he didn't get very far though. His last job ended up being a sting operation and he was charged with trafficking drugs, intent to sell, attempted kidnapping, attempted human trafficking and a few other things. He wouldn't tell them why he did it, he didn't want things to get any worse, even though you weren't sure if they could or not. It wasn't his finest moment, he was trying to help his family even if it was the worst way possible. He was a good man and a good dad. Your father was a man who would do anything for his family, especially to protect them, and that’s exactly why he did what he did and now he was suffering the consequences of his own actions. 

“I swear to god, YN.” Your mom yells as she grabs your arm, trying to pull you out of bed. “If you don't get your ass up in the next 30 seconds, I'm going to lose my mind! Your train leaves in 45 minutes and if you dont get ready and leave in 10 minutes then you're not going to be able to see your dad.” She sighs. “It’s his birthday, remember.”

Shit. You quickly bolt up in bed, scrambling to get out of your bed. You were rushing around your room grabbing whatever looked the cleanest on your floor before heading to your bathroom, slamming the door in the process. 

Your mom sighs loudly before she leaves your room so you can rush around and get ready. You knew it was hard for her, not having your dad around, and you were sometimes difficult but you were trying. You felt guilty, especially since she wasn't able to go on the visit today, her shitty boss wouldn't let her have the time off. It had only been a year since he’d been locked up and you, mom and your brother had faced some very hard times. The three of you have been barely surviving paying the bills, mortgage, car, gas, groceries as well as trying to pay back your dad's loan in cash, rather than jobs similar to what your dad did.

Your mom was working 2 jobs, you and your brother both working full time, and all your money went towards everything needing to be paid, rarely leaving you much of anything left over but the three of you made it work, you always figured it out. You would do whatever you needed to do. 

You're running down the stairs, trying to put your hair into a semi decent bun and forfeiting any makeup. 

“You ready?” Your mom asks, car keys in her hand. 

“Yeah, just let me grab my bag.” you breathe. You run into the kitchen, snatching your purse from the counter before you head back to the front door that's left wide open. You roll your eyes heading out the door, closing it behind you before sliding into the passenger seat of the car the three of you shared. 

Your mom doesn't say a word to you on the ride to the train station. You hold your train ticket in your hand as she pulls in front of the station. “Please tell him happy birthday from me and that I love him.” she whispers as you're getting out of the car. 

You give her a half smile. “I will mom.” You say, getting out of the car and closing the door. It doesn't take you long to navigate your way through the station, you’ve been making this trip a few times a month. You tried to see him as much as you could but between work, work and work, you never had a ton of time. You picked a seat on the train, setting your bag down in the seat beside you. You just made it on time, seconds later you were on your way and you couldn't wait to see your dad. 

You stood in line, waiting to have your bag checked and to go through the x-ray machine. When that was all clear you headed to the front desk, showing your ID and filling out paperwork before you could even go into the room and wait for him. You sit down, your stomach is twisting with nerves. You weren't sure why, this was like any other visit you had been on. 

“LN, YN.” You hear. “You can head in now.” the guard finishes, pointing towards a visitation room. The door buzzes open and you see your dad immediately, sitting in the back, in the middle of the room. His fingers were locked together with his head down. It felt like it had been forever since you had last seen him. “Dad.” you sniffle and his head shoots up, a smile spreads across his face so quickly as he stands up from his chair. You walk towards him, his arms are wide open, waiting to embrace you. You crash into his chest, wrapping your arms around him as he does you, holding you tightly. You missed his hugs, and the safeness you felt from him. You couldn't remember the last time you had felt safe.

You both let go, tears brimming in your eyes as you both sit down across from each other. 

“Happy birthday dad.” you smile. He reaches out to grab your hand, whispering a small thank you while his head hangs low. “Mom also wishes you a happy birthday, and she says that she loves you.” You tell him, but you knew he already knew that. 

“I know,” he smiles. “I'm assuming that she had to work today?” he asks. 

You nod your head. 

“She tried to get the time off but you know Dave, he’s a dick and wouldn't even let her have the morning off.” you tell him.

But again, you knew he already knew that. Dave and your dad had been friends for years, but after your dad was sentenced the man acted as if he never knew him and was never friends with him. Your eyes wander around the room, as if anything would be different since the last time you were here. Your dad begins telling you a story, something funny that had happened the other day. You were listening, but you couldn't help but let your eyes wander.

You looked out into the common room, as you were scanning the room, your eyes landed on someone. A man, a very handsome dark haired, angry looking man staring directly at you. You tried to look away from him, but it's like you were locked in with him. He was so captivating you honestly didn't even want to look away, but you do, not before he smiles at you slightly, giving you a small wink. 

You’re brought out of your trance by your dad clearing his throat before continuing on with his story. You catch the end of it, laughing along with him even though you didn't really hear the rest of it. “Tell me about everything. What’s going on with you? How is your brother?” he asks. Before you can answer the lights of the prison flicker, the alarm blares as the red siren lights up the room on beat with the alarms. 

“What’s happening?” you yell over the loud sounds. You were feeling a little panicked but before your dad could say anything you both hear yelling. You looked at the commotion in the common room, which was only separated from the visiting room by one large metal door. You glanced around, seeing the other visitors watching what was happening but no one was reacting to anything. 

“I'm sure the guards will get it sorted, fights break out all the time. No need to worry.” Your dad tells you, trying to reassure you. 

You couldn't help but worry. You watched as more and more fights were beginning to break out between prisoners, prisoners and guards. You watched in horror, as the prisoners seemingly took the guards down more easily then they should have been able too. Your eyes were darting to every window that you could see and watched guard after guard collapse, inmates grabbing the guns or batons, a cluster of inmates slamming guards into the windows, shaking what is supposed to be bullet proof glass. 

Seconds later a fight in the visiting room breaks out after an inmate bashes a guard's head against the table. You're panicking now, other visitors are screaming, leaving their tables trying to escape, some pounding on the door, begging the guards to let them out.

The inmates from the common room begin trying to shoot the windows, or trying to pry open the doors into the visiting room. 

The doors were buzzed open letting the guards from the front now rush in from one side to try and calm the situation but instead they let the inmates rush through the other doors into the room where you and your dad were. He had taken you to the corner of the room, standing in front of you to protect you. You peek out from behind him, the two of you watching in horror as blood and tears are spilled, the cries and pleas from visitors are yelled out as the inmates attack anyone in their way, including those who were just trying to visit their loved ones. 

Your heart is pounding so loud, you can hear it in your ears. You feel weak, light headed. Your adrenaline hasn't kicked in yet. Your stomach is churning at all of the blood. Your father grabs your hand pulling you with him through another open door, and hopefully to safety. As soon as the two of you make it into another room, you're confronted by three large men. 

“Look.” Your dad begins. “We don't want any trouble. I'm just trying to keep my daughter safe.”

The man in front smiles, but even his smile is terrifying. 

“What a good dad you are. But don't worry.” He says. “We'll take her from here. I'll personally keep her safe.” He finishes, licking his lips. 

“No thank you.” your dad says. “We're just going to go.” You grip onto your dads orange jumpsuit. 

“Dad.” You whisper. He can hear the fear in your voice. 

He runs forward, punching the man, pushing him into the two men behind him. “Run YN! Run!” He screams as the men grab him, taking him elsewhere. You try to run for the door but you're grabbed, pulled back and pushed against the wall. The man who had been talking to your father stood inches from your face. You could see the evil in his eyes as he eyed you up. You can feel his breath on your neck as he moves closer towards you.

You look both ways, trying to find your way to escape. There's only one other door besides the one you came through and you're pretty sure it's locked. Fear jolts through your body as you try and think of anything you could possibly say or do to get yourself out of this situation but you know that there is nothing you can do, except try and fight. 

“Get away from me!” you yell, putting your hands on his chest and pushing as hard as you can. 

"Don't fucking do that.” He snaps, shoving you against the wall. He raises his hand as he gets closer to you, his finger tracing your face. You squeeze your eyes shut, tears rolling down your cheeks and you let out a scream, as loud as you could. You switched between yelling "help me." And screaming, hoping someone would come for you. 

The man slaps his hand over your mouth, angrily. "Why would you do that, don't you like me?" He asks. "It's been a long fucking time since we've been this close to a woman." He chuckles. You can feel his body pressing against you. You try to focus on anything else, but all you can hear is the sound of him breathing and the screams and cries of the ones caught in the riot. 

Just as you were about to give up, you feel a release. You can no longer feel his body pressing against you, you can hear yelling much closer. You open your eyes and see a dark haired man, and a familiar other dark haired man pulling the men away from you. Within seconds the man who wanted to attack you was down on the floor, and the two men who saved you grabbed your hands, pulling you out of the room and away from the chaos. 

Where was your dad? Was he okay? 

The three of you ran down a hallway, the alarms are still blaring, you can just barely hear police sirens from outside. 

The two men had no idea where to go, everywhere you looked there was violence, inmates with weapons and minimal guards that were alive. 

"Hey!" You hear from down the hall. You all turn around and see the man that had you pinned against the wall. Anger suddenly fuels you, wondering where your dad was. 

“What did you do to my dad!?” You scream. The man stops walking, a grin spreads across his face. “Don't worry, he's just fine. Now you two.” He says, pointing to the two men who were still holding onto you. “You don't get to take what's not yours.” He frowns. “I want her back.” He yells down the hall. The two men who had taken your father appear behind him. 

“Fuck.” One says. they turn around, pulling you in a different direction. You were turning corner after corner until one of them found an unlocked door. He opens it, quickly pulling you inside before slamming it shut. Your body is shaking, you can't help but sob. You never in a million years expected today to turn out how it has. 

Both the men quickly jump into action, grabbing whatever heavy pieces of furniture they can find to shove against the door. You watch them, still feeling just pure shock. 

"I'm sorry." You whisper. You weren't even entirely sure what you were sorry about but it felt appropriate in the moment. 

They both stop covering the door, staring at you. “Sorry for what?” One asks. 

“I.. I'm not sure. But you're in this mess now because of me.” You sigh. 

“We're in this because we didn't want to see an innocent woman get taken advantage of by some fucked up men. You didn't start it.” He says. 

“What's your name?” The other asks. 

"Y/N." You sniffle. 

“I’m Wooyoung, and this is San.” 

“Nice to meet you both. And thank you. I truly don't know what would have happened if you guys didn't save me.” 

“It's nothing.” San says, giving you a half smile. He could not stop staring at you, just like when you were in the visiting room with your dad and he had caught your eye. 

Before you could say anything back, the knob to the door started to shake. There's pounding at the door, and that's when you hear it. 

“Y/N.” your dad calls. “Y/N please let me in. They're coming.” He cries. “Please.” 

You run to the door, trying your best to move everything they had put against the door. 

“Y/N stop.” Wooyoung yells, trying to pull you away. 

“Please!” You cry. “Please help me. That's my dad, we need to let him in.” 

San and Wooyoung loom at each other. They both know this is a bad idea but knew that there would be no chance of you letting up. 

“Whatever happens?” San says. Wooyoung nods his head. 

“Whatever happens.” 

The two men help you pull the large filing cabinet, desk and other heavy things away from the door. You unlock the deadbolt, ripping the door open, the smile on your face falling immediately. 

“I'm sorry Y/N. I'm so sorry.” He cries. He's pushed inside the room by the three men from before. He trips, falling to the floor with a thud. You wanted to go to him but the man has a gun now and it's pointed directly at you. 

“You two aren't very good at hiding.” He chuckles. 

“Eric, you don't have to do this.” Wooyoung says, his hands up as he inches towards you. 

“Fuck you, Woo. You'd be the fucking same if you were locked in the hole for months at a time.” Eric snaps. “And now I have a chance for something real and you two are trying to ruin it for me.” 

“I'm telling you not to fucking do this.” San snaps. He can see Eric eyeing you up, your dad laying on the floor, one of Eric's men's feet pinning him down. 

“You think I'm gonna listen to you?” Eric laughs. “Just enjoy the show.” He says, grabbing onto Your wrists. Wooyoung and San try to lurch forward but they're stopped by the other two, flashing their knives. Eric pushes you against the wall, pulling you back towards him. He pulls you to the ground, climbing on top of you, straddling you. The gun is still shoved in your face. You say nothing, tears just stream down your face. Your eyes dart in-between San and Wooyoung as you silently plead for one of them to do something. To help you. 

Eric rips open your shirt, exposing your bra. You look away, seeing Wooyoung and San nod towards each other. They both lunge for the men, knocking them down. Your dad scrambles to his feet taking over for San, as he runs for Eric, who was too in his own world with you to hear anything else. San tackles him, causing Eric to let go of the gun, it slides across the floor. Eric scrambles beneath San as he delivers hit after hit. 

“Everybody get on the fucking ground.” You hear. Smoke bombs thrown into the room. Guards in full tactical gear flood inside, guns at the ready. San gets off of Eric, all of them men laying on the floor. “Hands on your head.” They yell. 

You do as you're told. “We have a hostage located.” They go to you first, helping you up. You're coughing loudly as they guide you out of the room, into another one to be treated. They'd finally gotten everything settled down and started getting inmates back into their cells, or medical treatment. 

“You took a fucking hostage, the warden is deciding your punishment.” A guard snaps at Wooyoung and San as they escort them past the room you're in. You push the nurse away, running out of the room. 

“Wait!” You yell. “They didn't take me hostage. They saved me from him.” You say, pointing to Eric. “He tried to.. he tried to...” You cry. “They protected me from him and I'll forever be grateful.” you finish. You walk over to the two handcuffed men, wrapping your arms around both of them, until they're both escorted off. Both of them looking over their shoulders, giving you a smile and a wink. 

Once you were checked out by the nurse and cleared to go, you were led out to the front where your mom was waiting for you. You sobbed into her shoulder as she hugged you tightly, apologizing to you profusely. She grabbed your hand, pulling you out to the car. you look back at the prison as she drives away, silently thanking Wooyoung and San for saving you. You'd have to find some way to properly thank them sometime. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” Your mom asks. 

“Dad and I were talking when fights broke out. Inmates were attacking guards and other inmates.” You sigh. “They opened the doors to the visitation room to let guards in but inmates rushed in.. one gut I guess had his sights set on me.” 

“Dad protected you right?” Your mom asks. 

“He tried. But there were 3 of them and one of him.. they took him away. And I was alone.” You look over at your mom, she has tears in her eyes as she listens to you. “But then two men rushed in and grabbed me, helped me escape. Took me to a room and barricaded the door.” 

“They didn't hurt you did they?” She whispers. 

“No mom, they didn't. Dad started banging on the door.. they helped me move everything and open the door but the bad guy was there with him, they pushed him in.. the guy tried to.. r..” you pause. Your mom looks horrified. “He didn't. Wooyoung and San tackled him and then the guards came in.” 

“That was extremely lucky that they were there for you.” She sighs. “I'm so sorry baby.” 

“It's not your fault mom. You didn't know that was going to happen.” You say. “No one could have predicted that would happen.” 

The rest of the way you drive home in silence. You really want to just go to bed. Luckily you didn't have to work today so you could do just that. As you walked in the house, your brother Jaehyun rushed to you, hugging you tightly. “I'm so glad you're okay.” He says, squeezes you even harder. 

“I won't be if you squeeze me anymore, you're gonna suffocate me.” You half chuckle, half panic. He lets you go, patting your back before heading back to the living room. 

“Do you want some lunch?” Your mom asks. You raise an eyebrow. You had assumed she would have had to go back to work. 

“Don't you have to go back to work?” You ask. She looks at the ground. 

“Uh, well.. Dave said if I left to go to you, I wouldn't have a job. It's not worth it if he won't let me go to my child who was in the middle of a prison riot. Don't worry, I'll find something else.” She smiles. 

Fuck Dave. You went up to your room, crawled in your bed and quickly fell asleep. The day was exhausting and you were still shook a week later. It was the week after the riot, and you had been answering everyone's questions about what happened, what it was like the guys who saved you. It was the talk of the town still but you were tired of talking about it. You were ready to forget about it now, which is why you agreed so fast when your friend Hwasa asked you to go out that night. There was a newish club that was apparently very exclusive and the two of you wanted in. You got ready in a hurry, doing your makeup and your hair the best you could. You slipped on your favorite club dress as well as shoes and headed for the front door. 

“I'm going out, bye!” You yell, slamming the door behind you. You run down the driveway heading to Hwasa's car. 

The drive to the club is long. When you finally see it, you're mesmerized. It's bigger than you imagined, the bright sign outside reads Ateez. You were so excited. The line was extremely long, and as you walked up to the bouncer he shooed you to the back of the line. It seemed like you were never going to get in. 

After about twenty minutes, you noticed a man staring at you that was walking the line, he walked past you, before backing up to look at you again. 

“L/N Y/N?” He asks, eyeing you up and down. 

“Yes?” You respond, staring at the handsome man. 

“Come with me.” He says, motioning for you and Hwasa to follow him. You and Hwasa look at each other, she shrugs her shoulders, following the man and dragging you along behind. He stops at the bouncer, pointing to you. “L/N Y/N. Add her to the list. VIP.” He finishes, bringing you both inside. What the hell did you do to get this sort of treatment? 

The two of you walk behind the man, following him really without any questions. You pass what looks like the main bar, the dance floor and head up some stairs. The rope is removed from the hook, letting the three of you into the VIP area. 

“You can stay here if you'd like. Your drinks are all on the house, whatever you'd like. If you need anything, my name is Mingi, don't hesitate to ask.” He says. 

“Um, I do have a question.” You say, slightly raising your hand. “How? Um, why? And um what?” You say. 

Mingi chuckles. “You helped my brothers out, by not adding time to their sentences. They both could have gotten a lot more time after that riot. But they didn't, because of you. So from now on, if you are in trouble or need anything, you have 8 men who will happily help you out.” He says. “Well 6 for now, until San and Woo get out.” 

“All I did was tell the truth.” You say.

“There's a lot of women out there who would have lied, knowing who those two are.” He says. 

 “Also, You're related to them?” You ask, ignoring what he said before. You were too busy trying to stop your mouth from hanging down. 

“Well.. in a sense.” He laughs. “Enjoy your night.” He finishes before leaving the room. 

“What the hell!” Hwasa shouts, heading over to your private bar. She orders multiple drinks and shots for each of you to be brought to your table. As you two sit there, listening to the music the DJ is playing, drinking and just having a good time you see five men walk into the room. They stop, staring at you. As they walk over they introduce themselves. 

“Y/N.” One smiles. “I'm Seonghwa, this is Yeosang, Yunho, Jongho and Hongjoong.” He says pointing to each extremely handsome man. 

“Nice to meet you.” You smile back, waving at them all while hiccuping in the process. 

“Thank you for what you did for Woo and San.” Seonghwa says. 

“Like I said to Mingi, I was just telling the truth. I didn't want them to get into trouble for saving me.” You explain. 

“If you need anything, and I mean anything, don't hesitate to call.” He says, sliding you a piece of paper. Written down are 8 phone numbers for you. This was honestly fucking surreal. Who knew this could happen for simply telling the truth? 

The men walk away and Hwasa stares at you in disbelief. “I almost wish it was me that day.” She laughs. “Let's go dance!” She says, trying to pull you up. 

“Let me just tidy these glasses.” You slur, stacking all the cups and shot glasses to bring back to the bartender. He laughs as you place them on the bar, and thanks you through his chuckles. 

You let Hwasa drag you down the stairs to the dance floor, immediately sliding her hands all over your body as you dance closely. The two of you always preferred to dance together, but sometimes if you were into it you'd dance with men.  This time you were too into dancing with Hwasa, you didn't want any men to disturb you. You turned around, grinding your ass into her as you looked around the club. You glanced up at the balcony and saw six men leaning on the railing, all their eyes staring directly at you. Why did you feel like your life was going to get a lot more interesting? 

[x-digitaldollhouse-x]

"Just Julia" Contestant Audition: Charlie McGuire

Adventurous ❄️ Loyal ❄️ Clumsy ❄️ Loves Outdoors ❄️ Cat Lover

Charlie McGuire (he/they/she) was born to extremely overprotective helicopter parents in the heart of San Myshuno. He often felt trapped in a bubble, rarely allowed to play sports, have sleepovers, or really much of anything that a kid would like to do. Their concerns weren't for nothing-- Charlie was always a klutz, and it seemed like he could end up bruised from just laying in bed. But how was he supposed to learn and grow from inside a small apartment? Trapped and suffocated amongst the skyscrapers and light pollution, he longed for something different.

Hitting young adulthood, Charlie moved out as fast as he could, forgoing university to travel and taking up odd jobs to fund his adventures. For a long time, he was technically homeless, going to a new unfamiliar land and finding temporary lodging before leaving a few weeks later to do it all over again. He learned new languages, tried different foods, met sims all around the world, explored his gender identity and sexuality, partied a bit, and fell in love with extreme sports. Due to him not staying anywhere for long, he only had a few flings here and there, and never any serious relationships. However, he cherishes every connection he makes, and is very loyal to the people he befriends, even if he's not with them in person.

It wasn't all fun and games, though; true to his clumsy nature, Charlie got himself in trouble frequently with injuries and mishaps. Bone breaks, hypothermia, getting drained by a vampire, a werewolf encounter that left him with scars, and a bad hostel stay involving toxic mold were just some of misfortunes he encountered. However, an incident about two years ago put a damper on his adventurous spirit; a trip to the volcano in Sulani left him with a painful burn on his face and a raging fear of fire. He'd never come that close to death before, and the ensuing recovery period became a dark time for Charlie. He decided to find a place in Mt. Komorebi, his favorite place to travel, and became a bit of a recluse for a while. All of a sudden, not only was he self-conscious of his burn scar, but he was hyper-aware of the lines forming on his face, the pain in his body, the gray in his hair... everything suddenly seemed so real. He was only in his late 20's, but his adventuring had put a lot of stress on his body in ways he hadn't realized.

Things started getting better once Charlie sought help for his depression, and slowly, he's been getting back into living life. He hasn't left Mt. Komorebi yet, but he's rediscovered his love of skiing, snowboarding, and rock climbing, and has been enjoying himself at all the local festivals. He's still recovering and dealing with his chronic pain, but he finally feels somewhat back to his old self. Now, he's ready to confront his most challenging adventure ever: reality TV. At 28 (but feeling much older), Charlie is interested in the idea of finding love and living a life a bit more stable. And what more adventurous and wild way to do it than on television? He still undoubtedly wants to travel a bit and experience new things, but the idea of a nice home to return to and someone by his side sounds pretty damn good.

Charlie has never heard of Julia. He doesn't even realize she's famous, or rich. Despite exploring the world, he's kinda been living under a rock for a while and social media is NOT his thing. The name "Feng" might ring a bell when he hears it, given his San My upbringing, but even back when he lived there, he didn't pay much attention to politics and whatnot. If Julia wants somebody who doesn't care about her money, Charlie's the sim for the job-- as long as Julia doesn't care a whole lot about his finances, since his bank balance right now is... yikes. Don't worry, though, he's looking for a steady job, the first one he's ever really had. He prefers not to cook, due to the fire hazard, but he'll make up for it in other ways. Charlie hasn't partied or hooked up with anyone in a very long time, but rest assured, he remembers how to do it. So for a loyal partner who'll try anything at least once, book a trip with Charlie!

(Charlie is my submission for the Just Julia bachelorette challenge by @plumbewb ! Private DL files will be shared if chosen :] )

((UPDATE: I changed some cc around so I'd be happier with him, the only problem is that the only good burn cc I could find goes over the eyebrows and sideburns aaaaah. Anyway, this is what he looks like now:))

[characteroulette]

A study on prosecutors -- (previous) (next)

Now we move to the Bailey and it's Reaper.

Barok is such a complicated, difficult character to describe. He's initially presented as a racist, cold man, determined to strike us down at every opportunity. But even in his first appearance we get a glimpse to the depths hiding inside this man. Perhaps the game doesn't do as well a job to endear us to him past the whole racism thing, but it does its damndest and it worked on quite a few of us! So let's see what they did right and where they could have gone a bit easier on making him our hated opponent.

We first hear about Barok from whispers around the courthouse. Stronghart told us our client had no one else to defend him and this is part of the reason why; no one survives a trial against the Reaper. If we want to fulfill Kazuma's wish, however, we have to go into this trial. We have to do the unthinkable and prove our client innocent in spite of all the odds stacked against us.

Going with a vampire vibe for Barok was a really good idea, I think. How much more Victorian era can you get than a nobleman who's secretly a vampire? We're told he's making his return to the courts on this case from a five year absence, an odd little note of intrigue that won't get paid off until later. Much, much later. But it sets him up as someone who isn't necessarily here for the glory of it. It sets him apart from other prosecutors we've faced in the series, as someone who has both won and lost his fair share of trials. He's someone with a focus on the corrupt, on those who have the money to dodge the law rather than face it. This is a really smart move, too. Despite his referring to us and others with that typical nobleman racism, he has a surprisingly solid foundation on which he does his work. He's fighting corruption rather than taking part in it. He's here to enact justice on those who wish to escape it rather than on those who are mostly innocent.

It really gives us our first proper dilemma for Ryuunosuke: our client isn't as innocent as he first seems. There's something wrong, foul work at play here, yet we're forced to go along and use these forged bits to prove our case. We're forced into a not guilty verdict even if we choose not to turn a blind eye to the trickery at play.

Of course Barok would see us in a foul light after that. Of course all his assumptions about us would be seemingly proved true. No matter our word, our choices, we still use forgeries to prove a guilty man innocent. Our ignorance is no excuse for what we've done.

It rattles Ryuunosuke, though, to have his trust taken advantage of so handily like that. It's more of the same for Barok, but it truly does disturb Ryuunosuke.

Barok facing that burning carriage and McGilded still inside with his stony expression, it is chilling. It almost asks us to suspect him of this murder. It asks us to consider his moniker once more, *Reaper of the Bailey*. Hence why, no matter how close Ryuunosuke gets to trusting Barok as we go along, something always holds him back. Learning the truth behind this incident doesn't clear up any of the doubt surrounding our Reaper. A clever way to keep us guessing about Barok's true motivations and character right up until the reveal.

Our next trial is an interesting one, a step backwards both for Ryuunosuke and for Barok. Those racist tones rear their ugly head as Barok takes this case not only to prove Souseki's guilt, but also to face us once more. We've intrigued him and he refuses to admit to it, but he wants to see if what he saw in our first encounter was really true or not. He wants to see if we're as worthy of chasing as every other criminal he's had to fight down.

(A personal aside, but I really did keep to my word in the McGilded trial. I may have agreed with Barok that there should be doubt cast upon these new and sudden changes to the evidence, but I stuck to my guns and pleaded for McGilded to be found innocent. It really coloured a lot of how I viewed these next two cases, of how I perceived Barok's thoughts on me during our next two battles.)

Once we get into the trial, we are faced once more by our cold and collected Reaper. He's prepared to crush us into nothing, but we refuse to yield. Ryuunosuke is a wolf, and the truth is his prey. He digs and claws at the smallest of details, leans as far over his desk as he can without vaulting himself over it, in order to expose every lie that stands before him.

And though he is loathe to admit as much, Barok starts to see our potential.

We go on wild theories and come up with insane postulations, but Barok encourages us. He challenges us to prove our arguments with the appropriate evidence, he despairs at how every illogical piece makes actual perfect sense in the picture we construct, but he never forces us to back down. He, too, can see the truth we're fighting for. He'll make us work for it, but even he can't deny Souseki's innocence. A fellow wolf is best suited when spotting one of their same ilk.

It's here, right here, where Barok starts to trust our insight. It's here, right here!!, where Barok spies our true potential and thinks to himself, yes. He can trust us to claw out the truth in any case we take on.

It's why, from then on, he seeks us out. He has to know, has to watch as our potential reaches its full shine. He has to witness us, someone from a country he's long since sworn vengeance against, prove all he's ever believed wrong.

I was definitely better suited to seeing his turn from the start. I liked him pretty much immediately the moment I saw him.

But his turn is right there buried in all his denial and wrongly placed anger. They had to work overtime to get his turn in as well, seeing as we only get three cases against him in the first game. They did a great job burying their lead, but from these two cases alone I called his character growth word for word. I knew that he believed in us and saw us as a worthy attorney. A partner, even, in weeding out the truth. I knew it and it still gets me hype as all hell thinking about it.

That, however, is for later. Back to our next case, the trial of Gina Lestrade.

There is so much riding on this case, from all the government secrets we drag out from the shadows to our own client's life to the absolute betrayal of our first ever trial here in the Bailey. Barok, who knows that McGilded was never innocent, gets to watch Ryuunosuke come to terms with this fact himself. And Ryuunosuke's refusal to shy away from that fact, I think, helps Barok in accepting how we have to work together to get the whole truth of what happened here. He may not want to show that he respects us, that he sees our potential, but it shows through as he allows us every chance we need to catch Gregson in his lie. It shows through in how he proclaims that the Yard have no authority here, it is only the truth which matters. We definitely wouldn't have been able to save Gina from her fate without his helping us along. It's such a great look into his true character without going into the whole reveal, I love everything about it.

This leads into our final scene with him, where he vagues about how he's got a storied past and how we shouldn't really take it personally. Ryuunosuke doesn't understand what he's getting at, but it's nice to see him try to explain that it's not us specifically whom he hates. It's a little awkward, a little confusing, and incredibly intriguing.

It's a great lead in to the next game, really. It's the first time we speak to him outside of a trial setting, as brief as it is.

A small detour: the Randst Magazine bits and the dlc trial. The one extra Barok appears in for the first game is so hilarious. He straight up has a nightmare dream about having to try and prove Herlock guilty, it's so funny. The way he views Ryuunosuke is so spot on that his slight exaggeration barely even registers. It's a great little insight into his perceptions on these characters! And it's silly as an added bonus. The dlc trial is so good we were robbed the both of them for the rerelease. For one, it's a conflict mostly between Barok and Herlock by way of Iris. Ryuunosuke acting as Herlock's trial aid is really hilarious I cannot sell this enough. Barok's vibe against Herlock being *nemesis mine* while Herlock in turn regards him as a silly goose is also very, very good. Barok really does become silly in this lil trial, too, having two unique animations around pouring his wine and getting caught up in all of Herlock's bullshittery just like anyone else. And the cherry on top, it takes place on his birthday!! We have an actual birthday for a canon character acknowledged in-between games!! We were robbed, I tell you. Robbed!!

Anyway. Back to case two of our next game.

This takes place in a flashback, so Barok's trust in us isn't as strong as it was in the final case of the first game. This case taking place immediately after Souseki's first case is a lot of fun, though I really feel bad that the guy had to deal with two trials in a row, both headed by Barok. Since Barok is gruffer once more, his banter with us is back to giving us a lot less leeway than we had in our last trial. I, for one, still find it a lot of fun. And we get a second trial day on top of everything! This trial is more of a way to set up what we should expect from here on out, because things get even more excellent from here.

Case 3 is, of course, the proper return of our boy Ryuunosuke. We get to visit Barok in his office and everything about this is excellent. Ryuunosuke and Iris poking around, saying whatever they want while Barok is literally right there, is such a funny dynamic. And Barok's genuine moment of concern he lets slip through for his university friend, along with his genuine shock at Ryuunosuke being the one to take on his case, it's a great show of how far Barok has come from the last we remember of him. Some part of him realises that, with Ryuunosuke heading Albert's case, it means Albert truly is innocent.

And of course Barok would want to take on Albert's trial himself. That's his friend whom most would laugh straight out of the courtroom. Barok has loyalty in him, this is such a great way to show it before it really comes into play.

Of course, special mention to the dialogue you get if you show your armband to him in his office. His reaction is so gentle and sorrowful that it struck me so deeply. Barok understands what we're going through. He understands the weight of a ghost looming over us and all that legacy we end up shouldering in our drive to come to terms with that grief. Ryuunosuke being concerned for his well being despite not understanding why himself is right actually agh.

The trial itself is great fun as well. Barok fighting to prove his friend's guilt while also defending his friend's work is such a clever play on both his and the writing's part. We have to fight tooth and nail, reclaim our wolf claws and teeth, in order to gain some ground until Susato arrives to help. We regretfully have to prove Albert's science to be bogus, but it allows us another investigation day.

And what an investigation it is, complete with the second most bonkers dance of deduction with our very silly friend Herlock Sholmes. (The first is the soap thing I cannot get over that HERLOCK MY DUDE WHAT EVEN.) But our focus lies in the trial's second day, where Barok really gets to have fun again as we tear open some more government secrets.

It's so funny how they let Ryuunosuke back into the courts only for him to immediately start uncovering more government lies. Barok helps him along, too, getting a great moment where he calls Dr Sithe to the stand with the declaration that no authority can restrict the truth from getting out. It calls back to the final case of the first game where he doesn't cow to Gregson and it's such a great show of his unwillingness to back down. He, too, is a wolf with the truth in his teeth, and he refuses to let it escape his grasp. Just the same as Ryuunosuke.

Once the trial ends and Albert's innocence is proven, however, Barok calls us back in. Barok knows by now he can trust Ryuunosuke. He can really trust us. It's time for all the secrets and lies to come to and end. It's time to start explaining some demons, to take a step towards facing them. So he unmasks the Professor for us to see and reveals to us a deep scar on his heart. We've learned some of the details, but we've yet to learn the full truth. And we won't until we get to our next case.

Everything has been leading to this moment. Barok is arrested for Gregson's murder and we have to defend him.

Ryuunosuke wondering how he can trust Barok, if he can even trust Barok, despite his insisting on taking Barok's case is so telling. Ryuunosuke all ready trusts Barok so much, yet he doesn't quite recognise it yet. And Barok in a perfect parallel refuses to allow Ryuunosuke to take on his defence until literally the last minute. And it's such a cute little detail to put in that he's worried about Albert and received a letter from him. Another step towards making him less the creature we've mostly seen him depicted as so far. When he does acquiesce, though, he recognises that he has to place his full trust in us. No matter how terrifying it is, he knows we'll make sense of the absolutely ridiculous scenario surrounding this case.

He doesn't yet realise how deep this is going to go, but how could he? Ryuunosuke might dig out the absolute truth against all odds, but Barok has no reason to suspect this goes all the way back to his brother and the Professor.

Kazuma is out for blood, which makes sense even before we have all the pieces. His father was killed, was scapegoated as a mass murderer, and Barok was the one to prove his father the murderer. Barok strangely doesn't seem to hold any ill will towards Kazuma at all, though. It speaks of their being some sort of actual camaraderie built up during the time Barok was mentoring him. And Barok has to give what seems, on the surface, the most ridiculous testimony so far.

He trusts us to find the truth, though. So we do and keep digging and digging and digging.

Everything about this case is revealing painful truths. It's the question of if this truth is better off staying hidden away, considering how much it hurts those related to it. A man nearly killed himself over it. Gregson was killed for it. Kazuma nearly killed for it. And the Reaper haunting Barok for all this time has been, in actuality, more accurately his brother than he ever knew.

It's a difficult truth to confront, but Barok is willing to do so. He's seen us claw open so many secrets all ready, he's seen us tear open the truth to the bone, and he's willing to help us rip up this terrible, comfortable lie he's been living with for too long.

Watching everyone join forces to take down Stronghart is the exact catharsis we needed to end all this. It's matched, of course, by Barok's speech recognising us as the wolf we are.

Anyway yeah Barok is excellent I love him I wish him much happiness as Iris' grumpy uncle.

[ndantalion]

The Landlord

I tore down every glowing star off my ceiling last weekend. I just thought I didn’t need comments about it anymore, in any direction. I was starting to realize that everyone who complimented them was younger than me and most of them didn’t even have jobs. The stars left little marks, where I guess the light had faded the parts that weren’t covered. I felt like it was my second chance to make something out of it, to paint around them and preserve their memory. But I couldn’t think of anything, and it’s not like these projects ever turn out well if I over-complicate them. So I followed an online tutorial to prime everything neatly and fixed it all in off-white.

There’s a boy I’m thinking about impressing. He’s new at work—he’s from Australia. Everyone thinks he’s super funny, but I wonder if it’s maybe the accent giving him an edge. Either way I can kill a lot of time asking about all the little ways things are different there and I love when I’m the reason he tells a story that makes everyone else laugh. It’s like I own a little part of it.

All I know is he has a serious job like me, so he probably won’t think the stars are cute. And I can’t imagine staying with someone who doesn’t think the stars are cute, so it’s best to cut out the chance of learning his opinion at all. I guess I also shouldn’t ask him, “What are the stars like in the southern sky?” because what if he can’t answer me?

I hope, for some reason, that maybe a little whimsy would rub off on someone who loved me, but where would they find it nowadays? I still lose myself in fantasy novels, but rarely do I dream myself into them. I just re-read a series from my childhood that everyone agrees is garbage now. It didn’t really make me feel any better or worse.

I sometimes wish that no one had ever believed in me, because now, I feel like I’m doing just as well as everyone expected. I’m too soft to defy any odds or doubts. Maybe because of all the attention when I was young, my life’s always been characterized by waiting for something to happen, for my real important purpose to begin. But now that I’m older even that feeling’s fading. I guess it’s a good thing, because it’s increasingly clear that adventure comes with compromises I’m not willing to make.

I think I’m settling into anticipation-free existence nicely. The money just accumulates. I started renting out my spare room so I could watch it accumulate faster, and because I thought maybe someone interesting would show up. And once in a while, you know, it will be young people up for some concert or event or any excuse to get away from living at home.

They incorrectly think I was one of them because we’re around the same age and they compliment the stars and they try to get me to talk with them about all the ways that the world might magically become a better place. And I’m always secretly thinking, well, you could get a job, your parents might appreciate it. But they all say it’s harder nowadays and I wouldn’t know, since I work for a friend of my mom.

And I can’t explain it but I think they experience the world more purely than I do, so about half the time I do manage to stay, even though I always regret it. They’re less intelligent than I am, of that I’m absolutely certain. It just has to be true, because otherwise, what’s the point?

[yukidragon]

At the topic of genies, any headcanons for a genie!AU where Jack is a genie and Sunshine found the enchanted item he was imprisoned in?

I think what I find most interesting about the idea of a genie AU would be that you could arguably just tweak Jack’s powers a bit and he would fit the definition of a genie. Instead of a murder on stage, the previous genie could’ve tricked Joseph into taking their place as the new genie.

Jack as a genie would be interesting too in that he would be like those typical “be careful what you wish for” genies, but instead of wanting to screw his “master” over, he wants to... uh... well I guess you could say he still wants to screw them considering this is his sunshine we’re talking about, just in a different way, an absolutely consensual way. Regardless, the difference would be yandere obsession and love from the genie in question.

The popular mythos for genies is a person finds the container they’re trapped in, frees the genie, and gets 3 wishes in exchange. Sometimes there are more rules than this or different ones depending on the lore. The genie, most often being a trickster, finds ways to twist the wishes in their favor, usually to horrific ends to the summoner.

Naturally, Jack wouldn’t want a horrible end for his sunshine, but he might twist the wishes as much as he can... for their own good of course!

Really, Joseph’s backstory can be seen as a “be careful what you wish for” situation in some regards. Picture this... young adult Joseph is just barely scraping by out in the world. He’s a high school drop out with no family, no friends, and a nicotine addiction that drains what little money he can get through odd jobs. While hitchhiking, he comes across a curious object discarded in a ditch and finds it’s actually containing a genie.

What luck! After things went so wrong, something finally goes right in his life. Joseph makes his wishes... but the genie twists them. He wants to be seen by people, he wants to be loved. His wishes are granted with stardom... but the love directed at him is to his character, not him.

The two wishes Joseph made in the end make him question whether or not he should have wished them at all, leading to great highs and harsh lows. The third wish, made in a moment of desperation - maybe because he had been shot perhaps - winds up with him taking the genie’s place.

Though that gives me this pretty awful scenario of the wish making everyone remember the genie as [Redacted] Haberdae, with the genie literally taking Joseph’s place in all their memories and living the high life, rich, famous, and adored by many, while Jack was trapped and enslaved as the new genie.

A totally new person who looks nothing like him being remembered as the real [Redacted] Haberdae... it would be maddening for Jack. It could be another reason for Jack to lose himself in the role of his character in this universe, as magic prevented him from using his former names.

There’s a bit of irony here too that the genie steals the role of Sunny Day Jack, but it’s the only identity that Jack can even remember being due to the magic. The genie kept the identities he first willingly then unknowingly traded away to such a cruel trickster. His name was [Redacted] now even in his own mind.

Fast-forward to the present day. Jack is in a similar desperate situation in the game. 3 wishes, and he goes back into the container he was trapped in. (Let’s have it be a box for the Jack-in-the-box pun because why not?) In this world the SunnyTime Crew Show is one of those old shows that’s getting a modern day reboot, a well known classic. The star of the show went on to do many other roles, and is quite rich and famous.

In this AU, Jack not only wants to be free, but he would have every reason to want revenge against the genie that tricked him. The genie, knowing this, did try to get rid of the box so no one would find it (at least not until after he died of old age after living a fantastic life of luxury), but somehow it managed to get in the hands of the MC.

Jack has had 40 years to think about how to go about what he will do once someone frees him, how he could keep his freedom like the genie did to him and get revenge for what the genie stole from him. He could have even justified to himself how he would wind up using whoever freed him, as he won’t do anything bad to them. Unlike the genie, he’ll make things better for them. He’ll be a better person than he was in the past and far than the genie was. He won’t have to resort to lies and wishes that give him fake love that only gave him misery.

No, instead, Jack will offer his “master” suggestions, point out the issues that can come with certain wishes, and help guide them to something that’ll make them truly happy.

If his guidance benefitted both of them, well, all the better, right?

The bond between MC and Jack could be similar to the game in that there is some thought/emotion/feeling sharing going on, or it could stick with the usual genie lore where the genie is just serving the one who freed them. It really depends on one’s personal preference here.

In this AU, I imagine Jack wouldn’t expect to fall in love with the person who freed him, but MC is just so special and wonderful... how could he not? They need him too. Even if they are reluctant to make any wishes, afraid of the implications and knowing the tropes, the first wish they made spoke volumes about them and their lonely heart.

It was an innocent wish made without realizing what they had. MC just wanted love. The exact wording and tone depends on one own headcanon here, but I figure it’s something wished for after another one of Ian’s many heartbreaking phone calls that remind MC of just how much his cheating hurt them.

MC thought what the two of them had was forever, that Ian of all people would never do something like this to them. MC believed what they had was an unshakable love, a deep trust, and intimacy that only someone who was such a big part of their life since childhood could share. Now... Ian wasn’t letting them move on. He was reminding them of how much they loved him, how much they missed what the two of them had before.

MC was recklessly trying to abandon those old sickly sweet feelings of nostalgia, but a phone call like that would just remind them of just how much they wanted that love that Ian turned into a lie...

This leads to a thoughtless wish made when alone, where they thought no one would hear them.

It’s the perfect sort of wish to ensure Jack won’t be trapped in the box ever again. He’ll be their best friend forever~ This works out perfectly with his plans too. After all, he wanted to make sure his “master” wouldn’t suffer from the wishes like he did. What could be better than that?

I get an image for my specific version of the MC, Alice in this scenario. She knows she shouldn’t listen to Ian’s voice mails. They always make her feel so miserable, like she was the one who is responsible for all this pain they’re both suffering. She’s trying to move on, but a part of her feels so guilty about ignoring him that she can’t help it.

It’s another sickly sweet message. Ian sounds so heartbroken, remorseful. He misses Alice. Is she okay? Is she eating? Does she still remember this certain moment they shared in the past that meant so much to him? It meant everything to him. She means everything to him. He knows this is all his fault, but he’ll fix things. He loves her so much. Please don’t give up on him... not after everything they’ve been through and meant to each other.

It makes Alice’s resolve waver despite everything. She hates what happened. She hates Ian for doing this to her, to them, just as much as she still loves him. She hates that she still loves him. She hates that she aches for him and his suffering despite everything. She hates herself for feeling this way.

Alice wishes that she didn’t love Ian anymore. She wishes for love, true love, a love that would never, ever betray her like he did, or hurt her like he was. She wished for her true other half... a best friend who actually understood her and didn’t make her feel like she had to lock her heart away for both their sakes, someone who she could be wholly open to without fear or reservation that they would make her feel ashamed for the way she felt... someone who wouldn’t make her suffer like this anymore.

It was less a coherent wish and more of a ramble, just so many bottled up feelings bubbling out with cascade of tears. Alice didn’t even notice her tears falling onto the pretty box that she found at the thrift store as she sat on the floor of her apartment still clutching her cell phone with her bag of the purchases she made earlier that day lying haphazard in front of her. She just poured out all of her wishes as if it compelled, unable to stop herself from just desperately wanting the love Ian constantly promised her, only from someone who wouldn’t betray her or lie to her like he did.

It really was a perfect “wish,” full of so many holes that a genie could twist into countless knots as it suited them. There were so many ways that it could cause Alice endless suffering if one felt so inclined. Fortunately for her, Jack didn’t want that. If anything he could relate to her on a far deeper level than he ever expected to feel from anyone before. He once was like her, desperately wishing for love, companionship... something real that would last forever...

That was when Jack revealed himself. She wanted a best friend forever who would love her and never betray her? Well, he was here to grant her wish.

To say it was a surprise would be an understatement. Alice went from a heartbroken wreck to panicked, but Jack managed to calm her down. He understood her, just like she wanted. What better way to understand each other than to be able to share feelings, even thoughts? It certainly was a benefit to both of them after all.

Finding a genie is an intimidating prospect. There’s the offer of so much power in a few simple words, and Alice used up one of her three wishes without meaning to. Sure she could undo the wish with another wish and get rid of Jack, but... he was so kind, and she was so painfully lonely. She knew all the stories that cautioned “be careful what you wish for,” especially when it came to mysterious supernatural entities with unknown agendas. Still... it was hard not to like him. It was hard not to trust him.

Sunny Day Jack is a well known character in this universe due to the SunnyTime Crew Show not becoming lost media. It makes his presence even more surreal for Alice. Heck, she might have grown up with the show being something she watched, or at least was vaguely aware of as an older show from before her time, something her mom watched as a kid.

Jack even cautioned Alice to think carefully about what she wanted to use her remaining 2 wishes for. They should only be used for the most important things. Don’t worry though, she had all the time in the world to think about them. She should just enjoy the results of her first one for now, a best friend who cared about her and brightened her life, someone who would take care of her forever~

Of course, in order to take care of Alice, Jack would need to get rid of any obstacles that got between them. Genies are restrained with how much they can do with their magic, but if it’s for the sake of his sunshine’s wish, well, suddenly he can do a lot more.

This would give Jack more power than in the game... and make him a potentially far more dangerous threat to others.

In this scenario, Jack’s greatest threat would be the remaining two wishes Alice has and the shackles he made for himself in her first wish. He can’t do anything she doesn’t want. That’s fine though. He doesn’t want to do anything she wouldn’t want. He’s not cruel like the genie. He’s a better person now. He’s the real Sunny Day Jack... and soon the world will remember that too.

Alice gets a new roommate, a better place to live, and even a new job on the rebooted SunnyTime Crew Show. Things seem to be getting better for her, and it’s doing wonders for her self-esteem. She’s even less heartbroken about Ian, as he finally stopped leaving her voice mail messages. She can forget about him and focus on her new best friend Jack who treats her so well.

Others who meet Jack find it really weird how he’s cosplaying some old children’s show character 24/7, but he’s so nice, and he is such a good friend to Alice. He makes her so happy and it’s clear to everyone that the feeling is mutual.

Jack didn’t expect to fall in love with his “master” like he did, but Alice was just too sweet and kind. She was someone he wished to be with when he was still human. Sure, what he was doing was kind of... questionable... but what they had was real, unlike the fake love that the other genie tricked him into wishing for. For the first time he found someone who made him feel truly loved.

Jack never expected he would want to stay with his “master,” but soon he abandoned the idea of simply parting on good terms once all the wishes were used up, his freedom was ensured, and his revenge was complete. He truly would be Alice’s best friend forever, and more.

But Jack needed to take care of the former genie who tricked him. He couldn’t forgive that genie, nor could he trust that they didn’t still have some magic or other tricks that could screw him over again. He and his sunshine couldn’t be safe until he took care of all the obstacles in their way.

It’ll be fine though. Jack won’t let them hurt Alice or him ever again. With the help of his sunshine, he’ll get back everything that was stolen from him and more. He’ll have everything that he was denied in the first place. The world will never forget him again.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore

[ziggykyeons]

Full Name: Ziggy Kyeon.

Nicknames: Zigs, Kyeon, Stardust.

Pronouns and Gender: He/Him, cis man.

Birthday: July 15th, 1995.

Birth place: Aurora Bay.

How long have they been in town?: His whole life / been back and forth to LA frequently.

Sexuality: Bisexual.

Housing: Seabrook Quarter.

Occupation: YouTuber, Twitch Streamer, Attendant @ Comic Emporium. // @aurorabayaesthetic

BIO:

born in aurora bay to an american mother and a korean father, ziggy grew up the only child of a couple who had always longed for a larger family that never happened for them

due to being the only child they would ever have, ziggy's parents were generous with their time, money, love and patience - the last of which he often found himself using up copious amounts of

ever since he was a child, he could recall feeling odd that he had no idea what he wanted to do, what he wanted to be when he was older

none of the cliches held any appeal (doctor? no. racecar driver? no. astronaut? maybe! also no) and by the time he reached high school the unsureness of his path started to stress him out to a noticeable degree

it was freshman year of high school when he decided that distraction above all else was needed, and he made his youtube channel. getziggywithit was initially a resounding flop, barely cracking triple digit views due to the randomness of the videos and the lack of editing

At 16 he made his twitch channel, where he often streamed himself playing horror games. that garnered attention far quicker than his main channel ever did, and he kept himself to a mostly regular streaming schedule to try and ride the momentum

he kept at both and eventually overhauled his youtube channel to put most of his time into curating a presence that aligned with his twitch channel and with a more concrete direction, he eventually found initial online success with his coverage of supernatural events and haunted locations

though he graduated high school, he certainly didn't do as well as he could have if he had of applied himself adequately, but he was too focused on subscriber counts and algorithms to give it as much effort as he should have

with no desire to go to university, he knew his parents would support him through choosing to pursue his youtube/twitch careers full time and so he let them

to feel less like a sponge (and not the bob kind that he thinks changed the landscape of comedy) he got a job at the comic emporium because it was the easiest money he could earn around town while still engaging with something that actually interests him

to this day he's still doing all three, the comic emporium mostly because he's grown fond of it rather than actually needing to and he's kept to his upload schedule more religiously than he's ever kept to anything else

has been debating exploring starting some kind of podcast (because the world needs more of those, clearly)

PERSONALITY.

+ creative, imaginative, honest.

- jealous, escapist, opinionated.

FUN ADJACENT FACTS.

has unironically said "like and subscribe" in a casual conversation but is at least haunted by it

has had a second channel for 2 years now, it deviates from his main content and leans into more talking / commentary videos. was nearly doxed by harry potter adults for joking about the zealous nature of hp stans in their 30s

had a no lines, background cameo in resident evil: raccoon city because of how hard he goes for the resident evil franchise on his twitch channel

huge comic book fan and catches almost every cbm the week of release (or day of if he gets a premiere invitation)

goes to san diego comic con every year and goes all out with his choice of costume every time

CURRENT CONNECTIONS.

ex boyfriend of @maura-cortes

best friend of / marriage pact at 40 with @cherryxkoch

sometimes collaborator of @darcyxanthonyx

co-worker of @paxton-brady

friend of @cricketcampbell

family friend / hook up of @milaxclarke

ex-friend of @aeris-flores

real housewives franchise enthusiast with @macaulaymontgomery

SPECIFIC WANTED CONNECTIONS.

a roommate or two! he's in the process of buying his house in seabrook but lmao he thought he was going to be living in it with his now ex so that uppended a lotttt of his plans

tba.

GENERIC WANTED CONNECTIONS.

connections wise he’s pretty much an open book right now, but some baseline ideas that can be springboarded off are:

friendly.

a best friend / ride or dies / close friends / childhood friends / pseudo-siblings / friends / drunk friends / new friends / former roommate / people he's met in la / people he met at comic con / fellow nerds / follow horror enthusiasts / fellow gamers.

romantic

flirtationship / friends with benefits / one time hook ups / tinder matches / unrequited crush (can be either way) / blind dates / exes from high school / exes on good terms.

antagonistic.

enemies / former (best) friends / exes on bad terms / frenemies / rivals / negative influence / people who find him grating because he's videos can be a little annoying at times.

[marypsue]

You know the drill, it's Sneak Peek Sunday and I'm here with samples from former heroes who quit too late, the third and final part of the AU where (almost) all the Hawkins kids have powers. Enjoy! Or don't, I'm not the boss of you.

...

It’s finally summer, and Robin Buckley is bored out of her mind.

Obviously she didn’t expect that working a minimum-wage job at a mall food court was going to be a font of constant entertainment. But she’d kind of hoped working with one-fourth of Hawkins High’s own resident superteam might mean at least a little excitement. The odd caped villain popping up to monologue dramatically on top of the freezer counter. Alien invasion in the storeroom. Little things, to break up the monotonous mundanity of existence.

Instead, her sole intellectual stimulation’s coming from helping Steve Harrington help his gaggle of impressionable youths sneak into movies without paying, and arguing with him over who has to refill the toppings. The only time Robin’s even seen Steve play the superpower card is to drive off the other gaggle of impressionable youths who like to hang around the food-court fountain and abuse Scoops Ahoy’s free sample policy. And even then, they’re always back in a day or two. Some superpower.

When Robin points this out to him, though, Steve just says, “I could make you do the toppings refills every time, if you really want,” and she realises she doesn’t need to see his powers in action that bad, after all.

She doesn’t even get to see Barbie all day, despite working in the same food court. The smoothie place Barb’s working at wouldn’t hire Robin too, and the manager is a tyrant and a sadist and never lets Barb take her breaks when Robin has hers. All they can do is cast commiserating miserable glances across the rows of tables in the middle of the food court when Robin has to mop the front, and swing by each other’s fine establishments to talk on their breaks. And the Orange Julius Caesar shoos Robin right off if she doesn’t buy something while Barbara’s working. Robin’s spent way too much of her hard-earned Scoops money working her way through every flavour they offer, and started again from the beginning. If she never sees crushed ice again in her life, it’ll be too soon.

So of course Robin’s interested, when she catches Steve and the toothless one with the curls – Henderson? Robin’s pretty sure it’s Henderson – hiding in the breakroom and playing a tape of nonsense, over and over and over again.

Okay. So ‘interested’ might be a slight overstatement. Maybe ‘pissed that Steve’s abandoned her to deal with the mall maggots alone, again’ is more accurate. But still. They’re doing something, and Robin would literally rather set herself on fire than keep manning the counter for one more second.

“Hey, shitbirds!” she announces, storming into the back room and grabbing the tape player from the middle of the shitty card table before either Steve or Henderson can stop her. She holds it over her head, out of at least Henderson’s reach, still spilling its weird droning message. “At least one of you is getting paid to be out front right now. Enough word puzzles.”

She doesn’t really have a lot of patience for the nonplussed look Steve and Henderson trade over the table.

“…word puzzles?” Henderson asks her, at last, and Robin frowns at him.

“Yeah? The week is long, doofus, but it’s not over yet, and if you dillweeds haven’t cracked this thing yet, then sitting back here staring at it isn’t going to make it happen. Do your job.” This she directs at Steve, who has the nerve to frown at her like she’s not making sense.

“Buckley,” he says, squinting at her the way he used to squint at the blackboard in Clicker’s class, “what the hell are you talking about?”

It’s Robin’s turn to stare at him like he’s not making any sense. Because he’s not.

“Your job?” she tries, after a moment. “I mean, I didn’t think you wore that outfit just because you liked the way it looked, but -”

“Hey,” Henderson interrupts, with growing excitement. “Forget about the job for a second. Can you understand what the tape is saying?”

And now Robin gets to stare at him like he’s not making any sense. Because neither of them are.

“I’m not solving your stupid puzzle for you,” she says, at last.

“Not the message, okay! Just the words. Do you understand the words that are coming out of that tape.” Henderson says it like he’s explaining a particularly simple concept to a particularly stupid child. “Do you recognise them.”

Robin glances over at Steve, but sees no help coming from that quarter. “…yes? Is this some kind of trick question?”

“That’s cool,” Steve says, breaking into a grin, like everything makes sense now. “Hey, Buckley, you’ve been holding out on us. You never said you could speak Russian.”

“What? I don’t -” Robin starts, and then sees what she’d seen but hadn’t taken in: the notebooks strewn across the card table, the open dictionary, the scribbled notes… “Wait, this is Russian?”

Henderson nods. Steve nods. Robin looks at the tape player. Now that she’s listening for it, she can tell they’re right. The words spilling out of it definitely aren’t English – the syntax and pronunciation are all wrong. But the message, nonsensical though it is, is coming through loud and clear.

“…huh,” she says, putting the tape player back on the table. “Must be similar enough to – Spanish, I guess.”

Henderson’s giving her some kind of eyeball. “Russian and Spanish are nothing alike,” he informs her imperiously, like he’s the polyglot here. And then his eyes go wide. “Steve. Robin Buckley – wasn’t she on Nancy’s list?”

“Whoa, whoa,” Robin asks. “What list?”

The bell at the front counter dings four or five times in quick succession. Steve huffs out a sigh, and yells, “Coming!”, pushing himself up out of his seat. Robin follows hard on his heels.

“No way. No. You are not getting out of this that easily – Harrington! What list!”

[pardonmydelays]

"i just don't want to feel so stressed every time i go there & so far i really feel like i want to throw up when i wake up in the morning & i barely even sleep at night. it sucks. i'm just really tired & i want to cry."

That was literally me when I was working at a startup makeup + skincare company. Great company, great brands, and great team (there was only one person I'm convinced genuinely hated me and was clearly super fake to my face but all of that is a story in itself); however, I realized quickly that that industry was not for me, so that's why I went back to the boutique. I, too, was not born for customer service jobs--apparently, lol. I'm an extrovert and I love talking to people as well as helping them (as odd and hypocritical as that sounds to say), and I also love collaborative projects and teamwork, but I now know that I would enjoy all of those "features" in a creative setting for a fashion public relations agency or even for a retail clothing group (ex: URBN is a global consumer brand that includes Urban Outfitters and Anthropologie). Not retail clothing. I'd love to be a creative (or art) director even, and I'm sure I have the potential, but you need an extensive portfolio and at least 5 years of experience for that kind of job title. So that's why I'm just trying to land a(n entry level) job as an event designer in the fashion industry for a PR agency. That job is my #1 choice at least. I'm also interested in anything involving photography, so anything like an on-set photoshoot stylist or coordinator would be great too. I was actually going to suggest a book store, omg! I totally understand why you left, though. I just want to love what I do for a living and wake up looking forward to going to work, not dreading it. I'm done with retail. 🙃

I hope you have a great rest of your day!!

~���

yeah, this is the worst, cause i'm sure it's a great job & some people atually love working there, but not everything is made for you, right? & sometimes money is also not everything, you have to think about your mental health too (the reason i left my last job).

on the other hand, makeup + skin care company sounds like something i could try 🤭 well, cause that's the point, right? to try as many things as you can before you make your final decision, or something like that.

i don't know, i guess i just have to keep looking, i don't wanna be miserable again, i really need to find something i like or at least tolerate.

also, i'm a totally different kind of person - i'm a huuuge introvert, i can be loud on the internet but in reality i'm not like that, but i do love talking to people - but it has to be something i'm truly interested in (just like that bookstore i mentioned before, i met a lot of amazing people there & i could talk to my customers for hours cause we liked the same things & they were actually listening to my recommendations & all... that was quite awesome).

thank you so much, it's actually the next day now & i didn't even go there today cause i woke up sick (i have fever & i'm currently dying in my bed). i hope your day is better at least!

[crazy-a-45]

Look Royalty In The Eyes ~LH

I’ve worked for the Hemmings since my father died when I was 5 and we had no source of income. My mother was in desperate need of money, she spent lots of time doing odd jobs until she was offered a job in the Hemmings palace for the royal family and since she was known as a very honest and loving woman she quickly got the job. Then my mom was faced with a choice, leave me and progress in her new profession full force or take me with her and take me and have me learn alongside with her and thats exactly what she did and I still remember the first day I began working in the royal palace like it was yesterday.

I was scrubbing the floors with my tiny hands when the royal family was announced. “May all rise and bow to the royal Hemmings family” I large fat man bellowed. In response every maid in the bowed.

“Good afternoon your highnesses.” All the maids called to which I mimicked a little late causing the queen to take notice of me.

“And who is this little one?” She asked bending over as best as she could in her corseted dress to my level.

“My dearest apologies my queen it is our first day here and I promise she will learn the correct behavior very soon.” My mother rambled trying to get me out of whatever trouble was ahead.

“Nonsense she’s just a child, how old are you sweetheart?”

“Five” I answered playing with my skirt.

“How sweet. Why i have a little boy just about your age. Lucifer!” She called past the two older boys and who stepped aside revealing a boy only four inches taller than me.

“My name is Lucifer Hemmings age seven prince and youngest born.” He announced stepping forward and it was very evident he had no interest in the words he spoke.

“Good afternoon prince Lucifer my name is (Y/N)” I introduced holding out my hand for a shake. He was hesitant at first but eventually shook it.

Later that night when I went into his room to get his laundry he kind of bombarded me with questions

“Why are you working here?” He asked blankly sitting in his bed. “My father passed away six months ago and we need to make money.” I answered bluntly picking up the clothes on the floor. “May I ask you a question.” “Sure, go ahead.” “Are you happy?“ I asked bluntly. “Not really” He answered honestly His answer truly shocked me. Surely anyone in a royal family with endless amounts of money would be happy. “what do you mean not really, you live in a house the size of my village?!” I asked dumbly. “My brothers aren’t really that interested in hanging out with me and I can’t leave the palace so I don’t have any chance to make friends and… I don’t know it just gets lonely sometimes.” he confessed. “Let’s make a deal, I’ll be your friend only if you promise to be mine.” “That sounds like a good deal to me.” “Then can I call you Luke… Buddy.”

Since that night Luke and I have had been inseparable and we've stood by each other through everything, even during the worst of times.

“(Y/N)!” My mother called weakly from her bed, she first fell ill on my 13th birthday and for a year I’ve been picking up her work in the palace as well as mine and taking care of her. “Yes mother?” “You know I love you, right?” “Yes mother." "And I know you can take care of yourself when I’m gone.” “Please don’t do this mother!" I begged. She started talking about my life without her for a week now and it made an uneasiness settle in my stomach. "We have to sweetie I don’t have much time.” she admitted “I’ll go get you something to eat its lunch time.”

It didn’t take long after me leaving the room for another maid to call for me in distress. “(Y/N)! (Y/N)! Come quick its your mother!” Pure fear ran through my body as I dropped everything and ran towards the maids bedroom. I pushed through the slew of maids blocking my mother’s bed and everyone confirming the worst scenario as everyone apologized with teary eyes. Even though my heart knew the truth it all became real when I saw her lifeless body, I couldn’t contain my feelings anymore in one blood curdling scream I let them be known to everyone. Within seconds the person I need the most was by my side. “Lu-Lu-Luke she-she’s-” “shhhh, its ok I’ve got you.” he comforted holding me as I cried. “Luke I have no one now” “Look at me (Y/N).” he commanded sternly shaking me slightly. “You have me, you always have, always will ok? I will always be here to take care of you.” he stated looking straight into my eyes.

Ever since that day four years ago our relationship hasn’t changed and it seemed like the only thing that stayed the same for Luke since his 18th birthday. More pressure was placed on Luke to find a wife since his brothers had found their soul mates and made the unpopular decision to rule over their wife’s land so he had a chance to be king. For 2 years I watched as woman after woman try to seduce him with no success and I listened to countless arguments between him and his parents about his insatiable desires. On the other hand I was happy he didn’t find any woman suitable for him because it gave me some hope. I knew I loved him ever since my mother died, he was the only one that stood by me and comforted me. But who was I kidding Luke was destined to be a king and the only thing I’ve accomplished in 13 years was being a trustworthy and hardworking maid I had no chance. After some time, tired of his games, the king and queen began to hold grand and lavish balls to show him the array of princesses he could have. In other words these balls were my worst nightmares.

Luke’s POV:

The balls my parents held were large enough to make anyone sick, they only held them to show me the large array of royal maidens that were ready and wiling to be courted by me since as of now no one really met my expectation. Despite their frustrations they showed me countless woman they deemed expectable for me to marry. Currently they were shoving Madeline of the North down my throat. She was said to be loyal, intelligent, charming and ravishingly beautiful, seemingly perfect but I wasn’t as captivated by her as everyone else was. As we half hazardously waltzed I saw (Y/N) walk by to clean up tables and collect the dirty dishes to wash them upstairs. I shamelessly watched her make her way around the room becoming distracted by her, so much so that I barely noticed Madeline’s muted apologies as she continuously stepped on my feet. I continued to watch her gorgeous form gracefully walk around the room until she picked up her last dish making her way upstairs. My heart jumped a little as she began to walk out of my eyesight. Without a second thought I drew up an excuse to get away. “My apologies I must use the washroom.” I lied walking away without hearing my response.

I made my way upstairs seeing her form standing in front of the sink washing the dishes. I walked slowly and quietly towards her until I was in close proximity to her body and reached my arms around and grabbed her arms to slightly shaking her immediately making her turn around and let a gasp slip from her lips. “Luke! You know I’m jumpy!” she scolded splashing a little water on me. “I know but your reaction is just too funny!” I giggled. “How’s Madeline?” she teased drying her hands. She knew exactly how I felt about all the woman I encountered, I’ve found myself voicing my distaste to her on more than one occasion. “Ugh you would think a girl so highly regarded by everyone would dance a little better.” I groaned playing with the gold buttons on my white jacket. “Now you’re just being picky.” “No seriously you could probably dance better than her.” I stated. “Luke I’ve never waltzed in my life” she informed in slight disbelief. “Come here” I ordered softly. She looked a little unsure but eventually she took my outstretched hand. I pulled her in and started dancing to the muted music that played downstairs. “Don’t look down look at me” I instructed. “ Am I doing alright.” she asked nervously looking directly into my eyes. “Perfect, already better than Madeline.” I joked to hear her melodic laugh. At the conclusion of the song I gently dipped her and when I rebalanced her and looked into her eyes I saw something different. Something that I don’t let myself see all the time and right now, I couldn’t help myself. After years of ignoring this light in her eyes in this moment I couldn’t hold back, I leaned in and kissed her. And when I did I felt something I hadn’t before, something that no one has ever made me feel.

My closed eyes were ripped open when I heard footsteps. I tried to elongate the kiss as much as possible but when the foot steps got closer I tore my mouth from her and rushed to the other side of the kitchen. Luckily it was only my mother, she was one of the few in the palace who was extremely understanding of my relationship with (Y/N)… or the relationship we had before that kiss. “Lucifer Madeline is waiting for you.” my heart sunk a little as she said this. For a moment I forgot about my reality. "S-sorry, I’ll be right down.“ I stated looking back at (Y/N) seeing her turned back towards the dishes and wiping the corner of her mouth with her thumb.

End of Luke’s POV

Its been a week since Luke kissed me and took my breath away and I’ve been avoiding him. Its not that I didn’t know we needed to talk I was just scared of what he would say. As the days went on it became harder and harder to avoid him and do my job since my job was to mainly to make sure he was well taken care of. Today was laundry day and I had to have his clothes done by tomorrow morning so I decided it would be best to go in at midnight to collect his laundry while he was in a deep sleep. Opening the door I looked around and all I saw was pitch black darkness so I assumed he was already fast asleep and worked skillfully making my way around his room  picking up clothes from his favorite places to throw them considering he wasn’t the cleanliest of people. When I made my way to the dresser I felt an arm reach out beside me to flick on the light switch. "Hello (Y/N) long time no see" Luke half heartedly joked. I stayed stiff without making a sound. "Do you regret kissing me?" he asked slightly saddened. "No’” I sighed “Then look at me please” he begged holding my shoulder. I took a deep breath before turning myself around and what I saw made me gasp, there he stood at full length naked as the day he was born. “My god, Luke you’re naked!” I whisper yelled shooting my glance up to the ceiling. “I have a couple of things I need to talk to you about.” he paused taking in my features for a moment almost oblivious to how strange this encounter really was. “ I-I love you (Y/N) and I always have but I didn’t know it until I kissed you. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it but know that I do it all makes sense I thought something was wrong with me, all theses suitable woman were offering themselves to me and I didn’t even give them a second glance but that was because I met you and got to see how beautiful kind and smart you were every day and I couldn’t help but fall for you. I know that I’m meant to marry a princess but I can’t even think of being with someone other than you.” he confessed grabbing hold of my hand. “I love you too Luke I’ve known since the day you stood by me in the worst of times and when you kissed me it gave me hope, hope that maybe we could be together.” “We can be together and I'll make sure of it.” he promised tilting my head slightly downward to kiss my lips softly still holding my hand.

“May I confess something else to you?” he asked biting his lip. “Yes my love.” I stated granting him permission. “I’ve seen you undress.” he uttered smooth and seamlessly that I almost didn’t register what he said. “W-w-what?” “I went to go speak to you two days ago a-and y-you were undressing but I didn’t see all of you.” at this point Luke seemed hot and uncomfortable as he tried to continue his recollection. “Though I would have liked to” this confession shocked me, I never thought of myself to be sexually arousing to a man but here Luke was rigid member pointed towards the sky like a sword. “I’ve been so hard since that night” he whispered hotly in my ear moving my hand to his hardened length. “Look at me my love, look at how hard you’ve gotten me.” “Luke-” “Just look at me (Y/N)” he begged wrapping my hand tighter on his length. Ever so slowly I casted my glance to his member stiff and flushed waiting for attention. “May I see you (Y/N)? All of you?” he asked slowing his eager fingers from undoing my corset and skirt without permission. I nodded slightly and timidly and Luke giving me a kiss to reassure me and pressing his forehead to mine to show me that this wasn’t just purely for sexual arousal, it was for an emotional connection too. Before long I felt my skirt and undergarments pool at my feet then shortly after the release that only came with the loosening of a corset and I instantly felt self conscious and took the hand off his member to cover myself up. “Don’t.” he demand sternly placing my hand back on his shaft. “You’re beautiful.” he complemented staring at my breasts. The longer he stared the more shy I got but oddly enough his intense glare also made my body excited. “I want to make love to you” Luke blurted. “But I’ve never been with a woman before." he admitted still mesmerized by my bust. "That’s because it is sin to engage in pre-marital coition.” I protested knowing we’ve committed plenty of sins tonight. "But I would marry you right now if I could my love. Before you my life had no purpose I wouldn’t give that up for the world.“ he reasoned pulling me into a reassuring hug. "I know but it’ll be more special if we wait until marriage.” I coaxed nuzzling into his shoulder. We stayed cuddle to each other until Luke grabbed both of my shoulders and pulled my naked form away slightly “We could do other things” he proposed with the upmost of hope in his eyes.

It took me a moment to realize what he meant, two years ago after Ben’s abrupt marriage I heard his conversation with his brothers, them voicing their excitement and enthusiasm about ‘going down on a girl’. The conversation was rather long since Luke had so may questions but after some thought I couldn’t wrap my head around it either and I couldn’t ask them since eaves dropping was against the rules they gave us on the first day, so I used my resources. I walked to the maids room to see an older maid, Rosaline, who, as she said, 'committed her fair share of sins for money’ for a few answers. Her first response was to laugh since its not everyday a 16 year old asks sexual questions out of the blue but she eventually complied and in the slew of her explanation she threw in a couple of pointers which I was now thankful for.

“Please let me show you my love.” he begged kissing my hands. I bit my lip trying to deny myself of the my sinful desires but they were strong and overwhelming. “O-Ok” I agreed shrinking under his intense gaze. It didn’t take more than a moment  for him to wrap his arms under my bottom to pick me up and make the short walk to his soft luxury bed. “Be gentle please.” I asked timidly as he left open mouthed kiss on my neck lovingly taking his time. "I just want to worship your magnificent body" he nodded kissing his way to my collarbone. My attention shifted upward feeling incredibly insecure, in seconds my eyes shot back down with a high pitched moan. His head was currently attached to my nipple, sucking on it like a newborn baby during its first meal. “Does that feel nice?” he asked lowly and taking a nibble of me. “Luke” I moaned as he switched sides giving both equal attention. “Yes” I groan touching my hair as he smirked. He began to make a trail of kisses down my body to my center as I felt and heard  him take deep breath before he pushed my knees up and spread them. “My lord” he gasped and at the sight of my moistened lips. “I-I’m nervous” he admitted looking up from my center. “You don’t need to be, you don’t have to be perfect we’re doing this to show each other our love.” he nodded in response with a new determination in his eyes. he shifted a little before swinging my legs over his shoulders. My legs jolted around his head as he took his first bold lick up my soft spot. “F- sorry” I apologized for almost swearing and almost suffocating him with my thighs. He only chuckled before he repeated his action but stopped to stimulate my clitoris with slow gentle flicks and ever so often looking up at me to gauge my reaction to see if what he was doing was ok. I was too enchanted by the pleasure he was giving me to notice his stiffen tongue wiggle its way into me. “ Luke you can’t-” I tried to protest while his tongue lightly stretched me but was cut off by him and the pleasurable vibration his speech gave my lower half. “Just feel my love baby don’t worry about sin.” he coaxed  reaching his thumb to my clit while his mouth never leaving my body. “Luke I’m going to climax!” I moaned squeezing my eyes shut and arching my back. “Don’t stop looking at me baby.” He commanded placing my hand on the back of his head making me push his head further into my body and hooking his arm under my arched back pulling me further into him. “I love you Luke.” I screamed as I found release.

Luke’s POV:

I crawled up from my position between her legs and cuddled her flushed body. I caressed her arm and kissed her forehead trying to ignore my painfully hard member. When her breathing slowed she turned her head and giving me a smile while biting her lip, begging for a kiss. I dipped my head down to capture her lips with mine, but soon after my eyes shot opened and my mouth was forced away from hers. Looking down I saw her small hand wrapped firmly around my member pumping me slowly. “B-baby” “You showed me your love I want to show you mine” she whispered innocently. “B-but this was about you” I stuttered trying to mask how much pleasure I was getting from the simple action. “No this is about showing each other our love.” she pointed out. Before I had the chance to protest she was kissing my neck. “Like this Luke?"  she asked genuinely shifting her body to straddle mine and releasing my member. "Yeah, just like that” I moaned breathily. My body soon jolted from the feeling of her slit touching my member. “Sorry" (Y/N) apologized moving her lower half away from mine as I grit my teeth trying to subdue the my excessive desires while she continued trailing her mouth down my chest. Finally after what felt like hours she reached my erection and gripped it once more gawking at my size and staring directly up at me as she licked up my length. Keeping eye contact she took the tip in her mouth and sucked on it gently. "Mhmmm, this feels so good.” I whimpered inwardly as she began to slide her mouth further and further down my member inch by inch. “You take me so well” I encouraged gripping the sheets trying to keep my hands to myself. She moaned around me while stoking my thighs making throw my head back,  she later shocked me even more when she took me as far as she could in her mouth that her throat closed up around me making me abruptly sit back up and watch her innocent eyes with my eyebrows furrowed . Sustaining our eye contact she took me out of her mouth and firmly stuck her tongue between my slit. “Put me back in your mouth! Put me back in your mouth!” I moaned wide eyed gripping the sheets tighter. She giggled before complying not thinking much of my request but soon enough her eyes went wide when my ejaculation hit the back of her throat making her hold me still in her mouth.

She slowly slid me out of her mouth being careful not to let any of my warm seed leak out. “I-I should get you a tissue” I stated getting ready to get up but was stopped when she gripped my upper arm. She looked at me with her puffed out cheeks before she took one large gulp and her cheeks returned to normal size. For a moment I stood in awe in complete disbelief that she swallowed something that my brother had said was uncommon. “I love you" I sighed laying back on the bed cuddling into her. "Luke I-I should get going if I’m not back in the maid’s-” “(Y/N) I promise you’ll be back in time I just want to stay with you tonight.” I whispered tightening the arm that was slung around her. “Fine” she agreed cuddling into my shoulder

End of Luke’s POV

My eyes slowly opened to the sight of Luke’s peacefully sleeping form and the sun just peeking over the trees casting shadows of oranges purples and blues around the room, almost an hour and a half before all maids were due to wake up, just enough time to get the laundry from last night done. Carefully peeling my naked body from Luke’s I redressed myself, grabbed the dirty clothes including his from last night and gave him a kiss on the forehead knowing that the ideal situation would be to wake up to each other, but this was the best we were going to get at the moment. I made my best efforts to be quiet and not wake the rest of the palace and when I made it to the laundry room I thought I was in the clear. “You have a lot of nerve you know.” Head master Joseph growled from behind me making me turn around. “Good Mor-” “Don’t you dare speak!” he bellowed grabbing my arm and throwing me towards the cement wall making me squeal. “How dare you! How dare you commit such sins with poor Lucifer?! You think that you’re good enough to be his wife?! You’re a dirty maid and a prostitute. I thought that you would wise up and recognize your sins after you kissed him but then you spent the night with him and corrupt his innocent mind and only lord knows what you made him do.” he screamed slapping me across the face. I’ve seen him discipline other maids but never getting so personal as to use his hands and not his whip. “How would the King and Queen react to this, especially the queen, she entrusted you with the care of her son and you rob his innocence. YOU’LL BURN IN HELL FOR YOUR DEEDS!!” he insulted again balling his fist and hitting me again with no sign of stopping soon.

After my beating I was expected to continue my work like nothing happened like the other maids did, except unlike them I was covered in suspicious bruises. Head master Joseph already warned me about talking about what he has done since I was well aware of the rules, in no way was the head master supposed to be excessively abusive by hitting us with anything but the whip, but what’s the use in telling anybody what happened, he was telling the truth. I wasn’t good enough to be Luke’s wife I was probably just a way to pass time before he found a princess he wanted to be married to but despite my realization I still had to do my job. I tried my best to get into Luke’s room and do my job and get out which seemed to be impossible. “Good morning my love” Luke greeted hugging me from behind and kissing my neck. “Prince Lucifer That behavior is highly inappropriate and should be ceased at once.” I stated sternly moving my neck away from his plushy lips. “Why are you talking like that?” he asked turning me around. His mouth fell agape and eyes wide when he saw my bruised and cut face. “Prince Lucifer if you find me bothersome I’ll request to be reassigned” I offered ignoring his question. “(Y/N) what the hell are you talking about I love you and want to marry you! Last night-” “Last night didn’t happen.” I growled trying to hold back my tears. “Madeline will be visiting sometime this week Irina will be here to help you get ready when she does come.” I informed letting a single tear run from my eye immediately making me wipe my eye before it reached my cheekbone. “(Y/N) don’t do this we love each other I-I’ll even tell my parents about our love right now and we’ll get married as soon as possible, just please.” Luke cried trying to hug me. “Don’t” I warned biting my cheek to try to stop more tears from rushing out. “I have to get back to work.” I stated feigning coldness.

Luke’s POV:

“Lucifer Madeline is here for her visit!” my Mother sing songed. “Are you rea-” my mother paused walking into my room. “Gosh, Lucifer why aren’t you ready? And when was the last time you bathed?” she asked with a look of disgust. “Doesn’t matter,nothing does” I stated blandly. “What are you talking about?” “Promise me you won’t blow a gasket?” I asked sitting up. “What is it?” “I’ve fallen in love.” I confessed. becoming teary eyed. “That’s wonderful news, sweetheart nothing to me saddened about.” “But I fell in love with (Y/N) and we spent the night together but not fully but I don’t know what happened. One night we’re professing our love to each other and now she’s bruised and acting like nothing happened.” I babbled now sobbing into my hands. “I love her Mother, and if being with her means I will be banished from the palace, then-then-” “Don’t be ridiculous Lucifer” she stated cutting me off. “I’ve watched your love for each grow for years and despite the fact that she isn’t a princess that doesn’t mean anything to me. I want my son to be happy and I can’t fathom you being with anybody other than her. I know we’ve been pushing for you to find someone but me and your Father both want the best for you.” She sympathized taking hold of my hand and looking into my red eyes. “Get dressed. I’m going to make sure you marry the woman you love.”

End of Luke’s POV:

I was in the middle Head master Joseph’s laundry when I was called by the Queen. Looking down at my rolled up sleeves for a moment before I rolled them down to cover the few bruises and scars that covered my arms before making my way to the source of the call. “Yes my queen?” I answered before fully entering the kitchen and when I did my gaze instantly dropped to the floor at the sight of Luke. “Good afternoon (Y/N)” she greeted lightly. “Roll up your sleeves please.” she commanded gently looking at me with the same tenderness she always had. I looked up at her with wide eyes being met with a stern yet soft stare. I directed my attention back towards my arms reluctantly rolled up my sleeves. As soon as the first few marks were exposed I heard Luke’s breathe hitch in his throat. “What happened” “I received a beating from Head master Joseph.” I stated holding back the tears from the experience. For a moment I looked up and saw Luke react the same way while sucking his teeth. “This seems excessive to be a regular beating. What made him feel entitled to beat you like this considering you’ve never been in anyone’s ailments?” I paused for an elongated period trying to build the courage to say the truth because I surely wasn’t going to lie. “What happened the night you went to go do my son’s laundry?” immediately dropping to my knees pressing my palms together  and begging for forgiveness. “My dear queen I’m sorry, I’ve done unexplainable sins I will spend the rest of my life paying for them. Please don’t have me slew.” I cried pressing the nape of my thumbs to my forehead hard enough to give me a headache as salty tears fell down my cheeks. Instantly Luke jumped to my side as he always did in times like this. “Please don’t be ashamed of our love” he begged holding me and crying with me. “You can’t love me.” “Why?!” “Because Head master Joseph made me realize that I’m not good enough for you I’m a peasant Luke! I work for you, you command me around because I’m nothing! You’re supposed to marry a princess someone with status not wasting time and innocence with a worker!” I sobbed. “I don’t care! I love you and I’m not giving up until I marry you! All I want is you and my mother and father��accept that.” he stated shaking me much like he did when my mother died. Questioning his statement I looked towards the queen to see her soft and welcoming smile. “I want to marry you no matter what people say or do.”

*3 weeks later*

I stood in my pure white dress just staring out the out the window that overlooked the hall everyone was in. “Good morning sweetheart” the queen greeted as she walked into the room to which she received a small smile. “why do you seem so nervous?” she asked touching my shoulder. She was absolutely right but not because I was questioning marrying Luke in any way, it was because I have been the butt of everyone’s gossip. Some saying our marriage was an amazing step for society and social class and others saying it was a waste of the prince’s charm either way they effected me. Its just- a lot of things are going to change in a few hours.“ "But you’ll always have someone you love by your side.” she comforted holding me gently to not crease my dress. “You may not have known it but me and your mother were great friends.” she stated making her way towards a bed to sit on. “she was the one who first noticed the love you and Lucifer share. And before she passed she asked me to promise her to make sure you were happy, that you married your first love.” she said beginning to get teary eyed as well as making my tears pool on my lower lash line. “She asked me to give you this to you today, on the day you married your first love.” she announced handing me beautiful yet simple ovular silver necklace covered in small diamonds. Taking the piece of jewelry I inspected it knowing she saved for more than a few months to have enough money to buy it. “Open it” upon opening it I saw a picture of my mother and father on their wedding day. “they wanted to be here for you when the got married no matter what” she stated caressing my shoulder. “I want you to know that it’s never about where you come from its about the love that’s shared.” she exclaimed pulling my chin up to look at her. “so let’s dry our tears and get you married!”

3 Months later

“Is your dress too tight your highness?” Marisol asked pulling the strings of my corset. “Marisol you can address me as (Y/N), and yes its fine” I responded smoothing over the bottom of the pastel yellow dress. “I’m sorry (Y/N), I’ll go and see if Mrs. Helena is ready for your etiquette class.” she stated leaving the room and letting Luke in on her way out. “Is that my beautiful wife I’m seeing?” he teased with a large grin wrapping his arms around me. “I feel like since the wedding I never get to see you anymore” he mumbled nuzzling his head into my neck giving me small kisses. He wasn’t wrong right after we exchanged vows I had plenty of people telling me all the things I had to learn now that I was the next queen in line. It was extremely difficult for me, on one hand I wanted to give my undivided attention to my husband but I also knew it was my responsibility to know everything that every royal child has been taught since birth and prove whoever doubted our union wrong. "we never even got the chance to consummate the marriage" he rasped nibbling on my neck. “sorry baby I have to go to another class to get to.” I apologized trying to leave but I felt his arms tense around me keeping me in place. “What for?” he asked tugging at and fixing the details on my dress. “Table etiquette and tableware studies and lets not forget that you have class as well.” I stated blandly since I quite honestly didn’t want to go, I was desperate for some time with the other half of my heart. “Seriously, you know everything about those stupid tables and its fencing with Mr. Fredrick” “I’ve only set those tables I need more practice Lukey and you definitely more practice fencing.” I reasoned and teased turning to face him. “Oh really?” he giggled leaning in and kissing me slightly trailing his hands to the knots of my corset.  “(Y/N), Mrs.Helena is- oh dear!” Marisol squeaked seeing our compromising position. “We won’t be attending classes today could you please inform our teachers.” Without question Marisol nodded and left the room to relay the message. "Luke-" i tried to protest against his lips. "Shhhh, don't worry about it" he soothed shamelessly untying my corset. "You know," he corked moving his lips to my ear "people have been asking when i'll give you a baby. Do you think we could do that today?" He inquired ending it by nibbling my ear. A slight moan left my parted lips at his action. His hands on my corset were moving painfully but they stopped all together when it was just loose enough to pull down. "Does that sound good. What do you want my love?"

[monotonous-minutia]

I request a detailed tier list of all the Hoffmann productions you've ever seen 🥺

okay BUCKLE UP

from Best to Worst my absolutely objective ranking of all 48 productions of this opera I've seen. and I am only just now realizing what an insane number of productions I have seen of this opera.

the best

#1. 2009/2015 Metropolitan Opera production (designed & directed by Bartlet Sher my beloved) Hands-down the best. Great vibe, great atmosphere, great casts in both productions, great amounts of gay, and costumes/sets that evoke such a fantastical feel it's like we've actually fallen into some kind of creepy fantasy from ETA Hoffmann's universe! A must see for anyone who loves this opera and a great first production.

#2. 1995 La Scala. The cast is to die for, the costumes and pleasingly straightforward, the sets go smoothly from wacky to eerie at the appropriate times. But most importantly it contains hands-down the absolutely bonkers fantastic amazing GAYEST Hoffmann/Nicklausse team EVER--Neil Shicoff and Susanne Menzter. I lost my fucking mind the first time I watched this one and continue to do so every time I rewatch.

 #3. Munich 2013. Fun and wacky all over with a great cast and excellent amounts of gay. Delightful all the way. Diana Damrau positively slays as the ladies. Rest of the cast is excellent too, no complaints.

#4. Brussels 1985. Surprisingly gay for being so old. A lovely production overall and, as far as I know, the first recorded production of this opera containing the Violin Aria (so possibly the first recorded Oeser edit?) which makes it extra special.

#5. Orange 2000. Two words: Angelika Kirchschlager (okay, four words: The Hair). Production's a bit odd and it is the cursed short edit but it is quite gay and, well, Angelika Kirchschlager. Outdoor stage lends a great atmosphere to the creepy parts. Natalie Dessay reigns supreme as Olympia again.

#6. Hamburg 2021. Very fun (though fairly, and somewhat distractingly, odd at times) production with another to-die-for cast. Very gay. Brower and Bernheim quickly made it to my top 10 (possibly top 5) Hoffmann/Nicklausse pairs. Olga Peretyatko gives fantastic, wonderfully multi-faceted portrayals of all the ladies and Luca Pisaroni is iconic as the villains.

#7. Paris 2002. Not as much a fan of the production, but it makes my top 10 simply because we get Shicoff and Mentzer in these roles again, and you simply cannot beat them. you just can't.

#8. 1970 German film. The costumes and sets for this are very detailed and evocative of the story and the special effects are amazing. There’s a decent amount of added dialogue, especially at the end with the Muse’s speech, so a few story-related liberties taken, though some of them draw from the original play which is interesting. All-around good cast with another dynamic Hoffmann/Nicklausse duo (the way Hoffmann runs offstage calling Nicklausse’s name over and over at the end of the Giulietta act…oh. my. god.)

#9 Zurich 2021. A bit too dark lighting-wise at times (could give Vienna a run for its money) but another fun and eccentric production. No big names but a good cast overall and another wonderfully gay lead pair but the ending has MUCH to be desired. They straight-ified it. Makes no sense. (does not compel me.)

#10. Royal Opera House 1981/2016. A classic. Very gay despite being the abbreviated version. Luscious sets and costumes. Some unfortunate casting in the tenor role but beyond that quite good, and my first production so it’s got a special place in my heart.

the good stuff

#11. Metropolitan Opera 1988. Featuring Adorable Baby Shicoff in yet another delightfully gay performance with an extra sassy (and impeccably dressed) Nicklausse. Olympia’s phenomenal. Some odd bits but a mostly great cast and fun staging make up for it.

#12. Barcelona 2013. Phenomenal cast somewhat dampened by a strange production—does a good job emphasizing the darker parts of the opera, which is a relatively rare (so interesting) take, but a few directorial choices don’t vibe with me at all. Quite gay though and great acting/singing overall.

#13. Vienna 2000. Unfortunately this exists as a highlights-only reel with absolutely terrible image/sound quality but we get Shicoff yet again paired with an equally adorable Kirchschlager in one of the gayest performances on the planet (making their 2005 performance all the more bizarre, but more on that later).

#14. Toronto City Opera 2019. Hoffmann and Nicklausse are such a dynamic duo in this one in the most adorable way. It’s abbreviated even by Choudens standards which is obnoxious but it’s such a cute and fun production it still makes my top 20.

#15. Paris 2016. Same production as the 2002 one so that in and of itself is not my cup of tea but we get a good cast which carries it pretty well.

#16. Las Palmas (?date?) This one is about as close to full-on Oeser as anyone’s tried (except maybe the Genève 2008 one) so it’s remarkable for that. The production is equal parts campy and cool and the cast overall is very good, especially the villains and especially Dapertutto. Chemistry between Hoffmann and the ladies is pretty great. Decently gay. I need Nicklausse’s Act 1 costume immediately.

#17. Macerata 2005. A low-key production with an even mixture of fun and strange. Nicklausse is adorable and off-the-charts gay. Relatively unremarkable besides that.

#18. Orlando 2015. Why, oh why do we not have a full recording of this production?? It currently exists only as a youtube playlist with videos of some of the most important parts and it just looks SO GOOD it makes my top 20 without even having seen the entire thing.

#19. Regina Opera (NYC) 2011. Straightforward and fun and lots of ingenuity for a tiny space. Olympia and Antonia are particularly good. Hoffmann winds up in Nicklausse’s lap at the end. Nuff said.

#20. St. Petersburg (Florida) 2017. Another highlights-only reel but it looks really good and I’m mad we don’t get the rest of it. Refreshingly straightforward sets/costumes and engaging performance.

#21. 1951 film. This movie is so extra. There’s really no other way to describe it. Everyone is gay. The sets are gay. The room is gay. The air is gay. Ironically though Hoffmann and Nicklausse don’t get much gay time together. A lot of Nicklausse’s stuff is cut and I don’t like how they do the ending. The final trio in the Antonia act is fire though (pun intended—watch it and you’ll see).

#22 Miami 2017. Another highlight playlist on youtube. I like the “pour conjurer le danger” in particular. Nothing else terribly exciting though.

#23. Las Palmas 2022: WHY, IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2022, ARE WE STILL USING THE CHOUDENS EDIT FOR THIS OPERA?? At least Nicklausse is adorable and Hoffmann has good chemistry with him and the ladies (especially Antonia), but this fun and quirky production is absolutely wasted on the abbreviated edit. Come onnnnnnnn. (Especially after already attempting the Oeser one a few years back???)

decent

#24.  Skanderbeg 2005. Production doesn’t do much for me—looks like it came out of a bad sci-fi movie—and most of the acting isn’t great but it’s got a really cute Hoffmann/Nicklausse dynamic that made it worth the watch. Antonia was pretty good too.

#25.  Parma 1988. Unremarkable but pretty cute and gay.

#26. Avignon 2009. Only the Olympia act is available sadly but from little there is you can tell it’s a really fun and adorable production with good acting and signing all around.

#27. Paris 2000. Same production as the 2003/2016 one but the acting is less compelling except poor Kirchschlager who really does her best but it’s hard to sing to a wall and this Hoffmann is pretty much a wall. Nicklausse does get to slap Hoffmann though which is excellent.

#28. Royal Opera House 2000. Same production as the 1981/2016 one but the acting is overall less captivating.

#29. Beijing 2013. Unremarkable production with okay cast and annoying edit but the chemistry between Hoffmann and Nicklausse?? The Violin Aria blows it out of the park. They practically kiss at the end. It’s glorious.

#30. Buenos Aires 2019. I have a visceral reaction to this one and severe love-hate relationship with it. The edit sucks (no Violin Aria) but the cast is great. The sets are cool but the production/staging is questionable. Individual performances are good but there’s not much chemistry between anyone. And finally, despite the fact that we get next to no chemistry between Hoffmann and Nicklausse (and may I remind you NO VIOLIN ARIA) they decide to have Nicklausse and Hoffmann kiss at the end. I ranted about this for a full day once so I won’t go into any more here. But seriously. Come on.

#31. Met 1973. Super old, terrible sound/picture quality, but iconic thanks to the one, the only Dame Joan Sutherland singing all three heroines (not four, no Giulietta act in this one. It’s a really terrible edit).

questionable

#32. Genève 2008. Weird and downright unpleasant at times. Phenomenally gay but Hoffmann is a total jerk. Villains are quite good but the production takes away from pretty much everything. I’d like the heroines a lot better if it wasn’t for that awful bob cut (and Olympia’s costume…or rather lack thereof…). Giulietta somehow makes the hair work. My favorite edit so far—just wish it had a better production to go with it.

#33 Mexico City 2020. They tried, they really did, to do a Kaye edit but they tripped at the finish line. Also the production is kinda “?” Actors are pretty decent but I can’t get over Dapertutto and Giulietta kidnapping Nicklausse while Hoffmann does nothing. Matching outfits are a win but there’s not much else.

#34 Seoul 2019. Interesting production with good acting. Some really odd directorial choices. Edit is awful.

#35 Monte-Carlo 2018. I hate this one for making Juan Diego Flórez one of my favorite Hoffmanns but giving him a terrible production to work with. We get a nicely devious set of villains and Olga Peretyatko is great as the ladies (thank goodness she gets another shot in the Hamburg one four years later) but I don’t even want to talk about what they do with Nicklausse here.

#36 Lyon 1993. I was hyped for this one, I really was. Reviews kept praising it for the cast (which is great) and the fact it’s the first recording to use the Kaye edit, but…it doesn’t really? The edit is practically unrecognizable; aside from some parts of the orchestration I really couldn’t tell you which edit it was using. The production itself is…wild. Disturbing almost. I have no idea what’s going on, it’s almost like some kind of fever dream.

meh

#37. Moscow 2019. Unremarkable to the point of being forgettable. Odd and not compelling. Stop using Choudens people.

#38. Nagoya 2010. Okay production. Odd at points but Hoffmann is really cute and I do like the Antonia quite a bit.

#39. Hagan 2020. I don’t even know what this is supposed to be. I don’t think the director did either.

awful

#40. Berlin 2015. Edit is atrocious and production is equally bad. Nicklausse is pretty good and some of the Hoffmanns are decent (because, yes, there are multiple performers playing Hoffmann) but it’s just…I don’t even know.

#41. Dutch National Opera 2018. Do you know how much I’d give to see (most of) this cast in a Hoffmann production? One that’s not this one because it’s awful? They try to modernize it but it just doesn’t work at all and they make Nicklausse a girl for the entire show and just. Wow. No thank you. John Osborne and Erwin Schrott deserve so much better.

#42. Madrid 2014. I couldn’t begin to tell you what they are trying to do in this one. Another terrible interpretation of Nicklausse and the rest of the characters don’t seem to know what they are doing. I don’t think anyone working on the show did.

#43. Brussels 2019. You could barely even call this Les contes d’Hoffmann because of all the ridiculous stuff they add to make it something it really is not. The production is just plain confusing. Is it the opera? Is it a movie? Is it them trying to film the movie? There’s no consistent reality. They throw the gay out the window here too with another girl Nicklausse. And Hoffmann is quite a piece of work himself.

#44. Salzburg 2005. Another monstrosity that attempts to un-gay the opera and totally demolishes the Hoffmann/Nicklausse dynamic. I can’t believe this is actually McVicar. Why would a gay opera director decide to direct one of the gayest operas ever only to mutilate it to this extent.

#45. Antwerp 2000. Same production as above so same level of terribleness.

#46. Klostenberg 2019. What. Just what. I can’t even.

#47. Bregenzer Festspiele 2015. I’m convinced everyone working on this was high on shrooms while they made it because I can’t think of any other explanation for how bizarre it is.

#48. Mexico City 1987. Didn’t even watch this one because Nicklausse is a tenor which is an unforgiveable sin.

and there you have it! Now I just need to watch two more to make it an even 50!

thank you for letting me rant about this opera yet again:) I never get tired of it!