#cos i know my brains going to try to hyperfixate

[clip-the-simp]

Not Much Else [Pt.1]

Ao3

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6

Pairing: Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Fem!Reader

Word count: 2,956

Warnings: canon typical violence, swearing, mention of drugs and surgery, (I’m bad at warning tags so just let me know if I need/should to add some)

Tags: Mild Proofreading, reader had bat wings, Bounty Hunting, deviation from TV show, pre!show events(?), (Again I'm bad at tags so let me know)

Summary: You're a vault experiment that makes it to the surface. Quickly you learn the lay of the land and a few years later end up working the same bounty as The Ghoul. You convince him to let you take a long after having a feeling that you just had to follow him. Where will this story lead? Only time (and my motivation) will tell.

A/N: this is cringy as shit so please forgive me. I’m trying to get back into writing and my current hyperfixation is Fallout. I've been a fan for years but a new found love was sparked with the show's release.

Be forewarned that this is going to be incredibly inaccurate to cannon events and really unrealistic honestly. But listen. If Lucy can have her finger zapped back on and working properly anything can happen.

The scientists of your vault had placed nearly 200 hundred people into cryo pods before the bombs had fallen. A few had been scientists, but most were test subjects. Those chosen to be experimented on were chosen from a vast array of different medical histories, genetic makeups, ages, and ethnicities which always resulted in different mutations. Only about one third of the subjects had volunteered, while the majority had been simply manipulated, kidnapped, and or drugged before being shoved into a cryopod.

You had been one of the majority that had been kidnapped. Before the bombs, you had been a star in HollyWood and went on to be in several films which included a western or two. You were still fairly young however, so when the threat of bombs falling had started to rise you had been cornered. A white cloth with chloroform was shoved into your face once you had gotten back to your film trailer after wrapping up the final scene for a movie you were co-starring in. You had only woken up for a brief moment after being kidnapped, which was right before they had shoved you into a pod and began the process to preserve your body for the next century or so.

When the scientist decided it was time to start experimenting, some wouldn’t survive the first round of injections but that never did stop the test. Even after death the bodies would continue to be used to determine different severities of treatments on human tissue.

However, those that didn’t have the fortune of passing within the first few rounds of chems being forced into their veins, they had far worse ahead of them. Which just so happened to be the group of unfortunate folks you wound up being.

It had been about 175 years after the bombs dropped before they dethawed you from your cryosleep and started on their process of testing and modifying your body. They had hoped, just like with all of their other experiments they had running, that you would be one of their best.

After the first initial round of chems they had started to cut into you and spliced your DNA with multiple different creatures. First it started with the removal and rewiring of your eyes. They had been replaced with those of a feline which had taken you months to recover from, but that didn’t stop the minor test they continued to perform.

The rewiring in your brain caused excruciating headaches for the first few months but soon you were able to view things from a new lens. Being able to see more than most at night was a great perk to have when the vaults tended to stay poorly lit. However this also caused you to have some sensitivities to bright lights, so in response to that the scientist designed specialized goggles to combat it but made them so they wouldn’t impair your ability to see at night with them still being on.

The next body modification came when a scorchbeast, a large mutated bat creature, had been killed and dragged into the vault. After careful consideration and candidate evaluation you had been chosen to be subjugated to the experiment. No one knew if your body would reject the new muscle and bones that had to be implanted, but your genes had the most likely success rate when looking at the data provided.

After a full year of recovery you had full mobility of the limbs, and with it having been a young scorchbeast, the wings hadn’t been to terribly large in comparison to your body. You had been due for more body installments but before the scientist had the opportunity to stick another knife in you all hell had broken loose.

One of the more aggressive test subjects had escaped from their enclosure and started wreaking havoc upon the vault. They had managed to set other people free while in a blind rage when they had broken into the control room. In doing so not only where you set free but so where all the others, including those in cryosleep.

However you hadn’t stuck around for long once everyone, mutated or not, had started attacking one another in a panic. Having seen map layouts of the vault in the halls on the way to your surgeries, you had been one of the first to make it to the surface and begin your trick through the waste land.

After a week you had managed to find your way to a town which was both a blessing and a curse. Outside the walls of the town there had been a dead man who still had his clothes on. Having realized you were still in your medical gown, you had stripped him of the garments, minus the underwear, and cut a large hole in the back of the shirt to accommodate for your wings. With pants and a shirt on you were now a little more confident when entering the settlement.

Even after getting more than a hospital gown on, people still had given you strange looks as you walked the streets. They snarled and ogled at the wings sprouting from your back, and even after tucking them under your arms while pulling them close to your sides, it didn’t stop the stairs. Your goggles had remained pulled over your eyes during the majority of your time on the surface, but you could tell people could still see the slits that were your pupils.

You had quickly learned the ways of the waste land. Caps controlled everything, violence was always the answer, and it was kill or be killed. So when a man suddenly cornered you in the alley way of that first town you were in, you quickly became a killer. Whether it was the animal genetics fused with your own or your will to survive, you had proceeded to rip that man's neck out with your teeth when he had gotten close enough.

In doing so you had gained a handful of caps, a slightly rusted knife, and a pistol that had enough ammo to mow down a small horde of ghouls. The only item of clothing you peeled from his body was a weathered trench coat made of leather. That had managed to cover your wings if you kept them tucked close enough, although a bet awkwardly.

With the handful of caps you had gathered you had managed to get some accentals and learned about bounty hunting. If you were going to survive in the world you had to adapt, and so you did.

Two years had passed since you first began living on the surface when you had encountered The Ghoul, face to face, for the first time. Both of you had been working the same job when the target in question got smart and hired a few armed guards. The two of you were knocked unconscious and tied up in a rotting building while the target and his goons ran off. You had come to when the splitting pain from being knocked out finally became too much for your body to suppress.

As you peeled your eyes open, you started to realize someone was tied to your back as you and the other person sat on the sand covered floor of the decaying house. Shuffling a bet you tried to grab the knife at your side but soon heard a groan from the person you were tied to. You hadn’t bothered before to try and see who it was, hoping to have gotten untied from one another before they had the chance to wake up and possibly kill you.

“Fucking hell.” You heard the man mumble as he tried to get his bearings as you had. Your heart made its way to your throat as you realized who it was. Although you had never met the man you recognized his voice from the rare occasion you had been in the same town together at the same time.

Fuck fuck fuck! You thought as you continued, more hastily this time, to try and get the knife at your side. You had never paid The Ghoul much attention, however you know of his reputation and that he was a gifted gun slinger. However, while you hadn't paid him much attention, he had been studying you. He had started to recognize you any time you just happened to be in the same town. It wasn't anything more than the fact you were exceedingly odd and always looked out of place from those shuffling around you. Although he was a ghoul and the farthest thing from normal looking, your wings would always take any and all attention from those around you. No matter how well hidden you tried to keep them.

“Stop fidgeting damn it.” Your body immediately froze as he spoke directly to you. A few shuffles of his own and he quickly had his hands on his own knife which sliced through the rope with relative ease. You fell forward slightly as the tension from the rope was released and you quickly stood to dust yourself off.

Turning around you saw The Ghoul doing the same thing as he stood. His duster was ripped to shreds but still served its purpose of covering him from the sun. The cowboy hat he held in his hands was quickly placed back on his head before he turned to glare at you. His spurs jingled a little as he faced you.

Everything in your body screamed at you to run before he could pull out his weapon, but his gaze had you pinned to your spot in the room. You swallowed hard before trying to move and look more relaxed then you really were. Crossing your arms you moved your eyes to meet his which started an immediate feeling of regret.

There was something about his eyes that held a feeling of familiarity but it was buried under the many years of being forced to live amongst the harsh conditions of the wasteland. The Ghoul’s eyes remained on your face for the longest time before traveling to the tips of your wings that peeked out from under your coat. You quickly tried to tuck them closer to hide them but that just led to him looking back to your face.

“Now how the hell you get those on your back?” The Ghoul pointed to where the wings had been showing just moments before. His question had brought you out of your frozen state as you tried justifying to yourself answering him truthfully. You didn’t figure it would hurt to be truthful, especially since it was only the two of you at that moment. Not to mention the odd feeling that you could rely on him to keep any information you needed to get off your chest.

“Vault experiments.” You answered plainly as you moved the extra appendages from under your coat and spread them a little farther out from your body as you stretched them. As you did this something shifted in his expression, almost a kin to pity. He looked back into your eyes as if trying to recognize you as you had done the same to him moments before. You had forgotten the fact your eyes were no longer human so whatever search he was on would be nearly impossible if he intended to find answers within them. Not to mention the fact that your goggles were currently tented from the light coming in from the setting sun.

“That’s unfortunate. Seems like those wings would be in the way of everything.” He stated while picking up some of his belongings that hadn’t been taken. You crossed your arms and leaned on one leg. Sure, the wings were annoying at first, but they had become useful as time went on. You always managed to travel farther than anyone else in the wasteland could in two days on foot.

“They’re actually quite helpful.” You stated as you began to check yourself for any belongings that might be missing. “People don’t expect an aerial assault nowadays. So ambushing people is quite the luxury when being a bounty hunter.” The Ghoul gave a low hum as he slung his bag back over his shoulder. Surprisingly enough they hadn’t stolen anything, but you assumed it was because they were more focused on getting out of there before the two of you woke up.

“Well sweetheart I must be on my way. That bounty is still out there and I don't need someone else getting my caps.” As he said this The Ghoul slung his leg over the wall of the decrepit house and began his trek to the target. Something in the back of your mind pricked at your thoughts as he walked away. The feeling that you needed to follow him into the wasteland grew stronger the farther he walked.

What was it about this guy that had you wanted to do nothing more than follow him like a lost puppy? You hadn’t meant to be working the same bounty but somehow it felt like it was meant to be. Kicking yourself mentally, you sprinted after him. He had only managed to get a few yards away before you abruptly sprinted up behind him.

Out of instinct The Ghoul pulled his gun on you and had it aimed directly at your head. Your chest was rising and falling rapidly as you tried to catch your breath from the short unexpected run you just had. The adrenaline pumping through your veins prevented you from freezing or seeing the gun held to your face as much of a threat at that moment. All your mind was trained on was convincing The Ghoul to take you with him on this job.

“Take me with you.” Was all you could blurt out. Your voice had been shaky which you hoped wouldn’t be too noticeable but The Ghoul definitely caught it. He lowered his gun to keep it aimed at your chest instead.

“Now why should I do that?” He asked as he raised a nonexistent eyebrow. The sun was getting low which caused a shadow to shroud most of The Ghoul’s face. A knot began to form in your stomach. You hadn’t thought this through at all but had to come up with an excuse fast.

“I can be of help. Like I stated before, aerial assault isn’t something most folks are prepared to fight against.” That was practically the only key advantage you had on most other people. You had other talents, sure, but that was back up information in case the main appeal didn’t go through.

The Ghoul lifted his gun to tip his hat out of his face to get direct eye contact with you. His gaze fell and rose as he examined your form. It made you partly embarrassed as you pulled your wings in closer. He stood there and contemplated for a while until you broke the silence.

You grabbed the goggles from your face and sat them on top of your head. Your vision quickly adjusted to the new light exposed to your eyes. As The Ghoul looked back to your face you saw a bet of shock appear on his face before it was quickly masked again.

“Listen,” You started as your hands quickly began to fidget with one another. “I don't know why but I feel as if I’m supposed to go with you. If I had an explanation of why I would tell you but I don’t except for saying it’s a gut feeling.” The Ghoul’s expression stayed the same which quickly diminished your hope of joining him. Your eyes fell to the ground as you continued to speak.

“I don’t require caps or any sort of compensation for joining since I’m doing this out of complete and utter selflessness.” You were about to continue rambling before The Ghoul let out an exasperated sigh. Your attention brought back to his form. The Ghoul was pinching between his eyebrows as he holstered his gun. A few mumbles left his lips before his gaze finally settled back upon you.

“If you slow me down-” He started to say. You quickly cut him off as the realization that he was actually taking you along settled in.

“I won’t! I promise.” You said cheerfully as your wings slightly lifted from your sides. Your demeanor was probably a bit too cheerful though with how his expression changed.

“We’ll see if you keep that promise.” The Ghoul grumbled as he looked at the setting sun. It had nearly disappeared over the horizon which had put the world in a deep shade of purplish pink. It wouldn't be long before the sun was completely gone to leave the two of you in complete darkness.

However, that didn’t stop the two of you from traveling a bet that night. Your night vision was impeccable and The Ghoul had a lamp to guide his way. You stayed silent as did The Ghoul which hadn’t surprised you much. It had been about four hours of traveling before he finally spoke to inform you that it was time to siddle for the night.

[kingsandbastardz]

@bbcphile asked about Di Feisheng and neurodiversity and it's something that's been on my mind for awhile, so here we go.

100% thought DFS was on the spectrum when he first popped up on my screen. Cue Leonardo_DiCaprio_pointing.gif I related to so, so many of his behaviors.

Trauma/ptsd can often create symptoms similar to autism/adhd/etc due to how it fucks with your brain

Autism/adhd/etc are often co-morbid with ptsd and trauma due to abuse, bullying, increased sensitivities and higher risk taking behaviors that lead to impulsive decision making which then leads to higher rates of death.

Thoughts regarding why I think so:

1. Hyperfixation/special interest being his obsession with fighting only LXY

2. Extremely high masking - as in almost 24/7 except when alone, in front of Wuyan and possibly LLH. He doesn't have any of the perception, motor skills or speech issues some people on the spectrum have. This means he can fine tune his social skills as much as needed. He's incredibly opaque through the entire drama. His behavior is completely different from how others perceive him, how he portrays himself, what information is known about him. There's a solid disconnect between himself and what is revealed to the rest of the world. I strongly suspect he's the type that makes scripts for every social interaction he has with others and behaves based off that.

Masking at that level for so long means it's basically you. Until it's not. It's internalized. It's hard to differentiate between the you that is a mask vs you the unmasked weirdo that wants to sit on the floor all day in your underwear because it's grounding and limits sensory input.

Masking is also exhausting. He runs off to be by himself as soon as he is able. He stays in locations where he can be alone and limit sounds.

3. LLH's behavior with DFS: Yes, it is due to closeness, past history, and also unexplored emotion, but that doesn't explain the bonkers level of accommodation and lack of vitriol toward a man he spends many episodes believing killed his brother. Yes he was emotionally burnt out after 10 years. He could have been playing along to get DFS to work with him (which he didn't need to because he soft-poisoned him with asura grass - the stuff that doesn't have weird side effects like killing a person. Contrast that with wuxin huai JLQ and SGD use)

But that isn't all there is to it - he fully believes DFS wouldn't try to kill him seriously. When arguing or trying to convince him of anything, he doesn't hide the truths he hides from everyone else. He barely exhibits anger toward him beyond that one early "Do you still refuse to admit it?"

Imo he's like this because he knew DFS well enough to know that being angry won't work; he believes DFS thinks differently enough he there may be a disconnect in understanding the source LXY's anger. Considering how happy and clingy DFS was when he first showed up, I don't blame LLH for thinking this way? DFS certainly didn't share any information regarding his suspicions. More on DFS' style of logic later. He communicates with DFS a certain way because he knows:

DFS is very good at spotting lies. This is both autistic or trauma-related behavior in ppl who are very good at masking. He's hyper vigilant to begin with and pair that with him likely being very experienced at picking apart micro expressions, context vibes, logic holes, etc at high speed -- high masking individuals that create personal scripts for their interactions will often do this as a defense, to create a convincing enough set of behavior to 'behave like a person' with the rest of the world.

DFS will so strongly act on decisions based on the information he accepts that it's imperative he has as much of the needed info as possible. This speaks on a lot of experience interacting with DFS. LLH behaves this way because he doesn't want what happens when he doesn't.

4. Sensory issues: Specifically pertaining to sound/noise and food. He complains repeatedly about how noisy FDB and Su Xuayong were. In the women's mansion arc, the signaling beacon was making enough noise that it bothered him so he goes and pulls it out.

Using other preferred sounds: His preferred locations of the waterfalls or the top floor of the Lotus House makes me think of ambient noise machines where people play certain nature sounds to drown out other sounds and relax to. (again, grounding and sensory control)

He was very likely lying about his sense of taste to LXY to avoid rudeness, but there are multiple scenes implying some form of disordered eating. And there is also a scene where he comes in randomly and takes FDB's bowl of rice and walks out without taking anything else. It implies he may actually have certain food preferences even though there are other cases where he eats fine like at the grave robber banquet where he pretended to be someone else. So imo one partial possibility for this, aside from trauma, is autistic eating issues: not being able to eat in certain locations, having preferred tastes or textures, not wanting to combine their foods, eating very little. One common preference is for carbohydrates or processed foods - aka bread or rice. I know someone who's Special Food was chicken. They wouldn't have a problem having it very meal - but as an adult, understood that wasn't something they could always do.

5. Logic that makes perfect sense to him but not necessarily to others:

looking for LLH by flying to and investigating every single mountain peak until he found him (in a savant level display of power and skill)

end goal of wanting to be with LLH and fight him repeatedly forever (special interest, desire for repetition and a routine)

kidnapping QWM for LLH is totally not a bad thing since he wouldn't hurt her and is strong enough he can guarantee her safety

he doesn't communicate with LXY about his suspicions regarding Shan Gudao's death - which most sect leaders would have lead with. He didn't see this information as important to share until a purpose for it popped up later on.

his special interest takes priority over everything else: handing over control of the sect to JQL in favor of the Guyin map, Dongahi battle full of death and destruction and all he thought about was the dual

well, until his priorities change. The entire drama is his single-minded quest to heal LLH -- but it's still linked tightly to his special interest of fighting with LXY.

also "my only rival is LXY, let's fight fight fight fight"= "I only want to fight LXY" but framed in a manner that people of jianghu will immediately understand. But that's not actually what he wants. Here is a prime example of a communication issue where he's created a presentation of this strong fighter - he walks and talks like one perfectly - so LLH and everyone else is of course convinced he wants to be number 1 swordsman. That is the language he's using to present himself. And he wants to know this because, why wouldn't he want to measure himself against a benchmark? However his end goal isn't just to be number one. He wants to be able to fight and win and lose and win and lose against LXY and only LXY.

possible: won't kill women or even engage with them seriously if he deems them too weak, but will still fill his organization's leadership with them and give them huge amounts of power --- this logic doesn't make sense to me, but clearly does to him??

6. He shows love by allowing people in his personal space (LLH, Wuyan, etc) or sharing his hyperfixation (fighting). So him doggedly trying to get LLH to fight him? Well. Also whining to Wuyan every day for years about LXY? He's... sharing his special interest! Wuyan, feel loved! Also, another common form of showing love for autistics are doing things for people -- and dfs' love language is clearly acts of service.

7. One can argue he's a bit on the savant level of skills, but without typical disabilities. Also he's high masking enough that any disability he does have, you wouldn't see it at all. -- ok this might just make him a regular genius, then.

8. DFS' strict adherence to his own code of honor regardless of what anyone around him is doing

9. Need for routine or repetitive behavior - one can argue that martial arts being a special interest of his would actually make a ton of sense because it's about training over and over and over again until it becomes instinct. Daily training for years and years. You never stop. And you do it in quiet spaces away from people or places that can cause sensory issues.

10. Argument for some form of alexithymia: This one is a reach - as there's no evidence of this. But as it's often co-morbid with autism, I think could be an interesting internal reason for his ability to mask. As in, unless it's a very big feeling or a very large event, he may not recognize his own trauma as trauma. His bar for what is 'bad' is somewhere in the basement of hell, and every other traumatic event are just things that happen. He may not actually recognize fear. He chases happy things because at his age, he knows what anger, sadness and happiness are -- because they have easy to parse physical manifestations.

EDIT: I wasn't very clear up top - but I consider severe trauma to be a form of neurodiversity due to the long lasting and sometimes permanent changes it makes in a person's brain (especially when young and the brain is still being formed). So when I say I think it's possible for dfs to be neurodiverse, I'm referring to a range of things. Autism is very difficult to separate from ptsd/trauma for the reasons above, and will often manifest in the exact same ways with overlapping patterns of behavior. Any one of these things or many of these things collectively can exist without someone being neurodiverse.

Anyway this is just off the top of my had. I have this under a cut so I'll add more later as it comes they mind. (I think this gets called moral stubborness? Something like that?)

[sincapjelly]

OK SO LET'S TALK MY JAYA SON OC, enteeeer... Jamie! Full name, Jaemin. He is the older child of Jay and Nya, and he inherited Nya's water element. He has a younger sister, Rosie, who is the master of lightning, but more about her later. Right now I wanna talk a bit about Jamie!

Firstly, the name Jamie, was actually a placeholder name, but I'm probably never going to change it. I thought naming him Jamie was cheesy, but it grew on me so here we are, he is Jamie now!

So Jamie, he is the new master of water, he unlocked his true potential shortly before a new team was starting to form. Unlike our other main character, Liann, Jamie was more or less involved with the monastery due to his uncle, Kai, still having his element and being involved with Sora, Arin and Wyldfyre, who currently are the care takers of the monastery. So Jamie is another character who is trained by his parents, and he was used to the terms of ninja.

Jamie also becomes the co-leader of the new team alongside Liann. Before and during their first mission, Liann's more socially awkward and introverted nature, which is something she shares with Jamie, causes Jamie to think she is not very fond of him. But later they talk it out, and solve their issues with the power of ✨️communication✨️, which also in the story shows how they were raised and how they learned to solve problems from their families. I love Jaya and Geode so much, they are exellent parents.

Ok sorry, not drifting from the topic. Jamie gets his "always thinks of the worst outcome" habit from Jay, but he mixes it with Nya's "ok but calm down, let's think about a way out" so he is the smart/brain leader. He always considers every outcome, and in the beginning this makes him be scared of acting fast, because he feels the need to calculate every situation, but he manages to overcome this and starts using his ability to see the next few steps perfectly in his leaderships.

He is also the oldest of the team, same age with Liann, younger by a few months.

He is a very skilled ice skater! This is also a callback to Jay's skating skills! I love when characters carry traits from their family, this is also something I used with Liann, which I'll again, talk more in detail later!

He did unlock his true potential before the events of the first mission arc, but not really. What I mean is, Jamie fully overcame his fears of doing the wrong move during the mission, and finally unlocked his real true potential, using everything his powers offer for the first time ever. He learns that sometimes doing the non-perfect move is better than doing nothing, and he can't always be aware of everything. He can fix what he breaks later, one step at a time.

He is more like Nya in terms of being introverted and less of a yapper, though he has his moments of yapping too. His sister Rosie is a bigger yapper but lacks the passion Jamie has. She is just naturally sweet and friendly. While Jamie has Jay's hyperfixations mixed with Nya's usually calmer and more quiet nature, Rosie has the outgoing and talkative attitude, but her thing isn't the more brain/technical stuff like Jamie.

Despite people trying to put Jamie against his co-leader, Jamie is confident in himself. Which again, something he learned from his parents, mostly from Jay's experiences of feeling insecure. He knows how strong he is, and despite Liann lookinh like the more poster ninja, Jamie knows he is irreplacable and essential to the team.

You see, Liann is a more emotional decision maker. She has to act, she has to help, she can't stop to think about her steps. She needs Jamie to ground her, needs him to stay calm. But at the same time, Jamie needs Liann's fast thinking in combat and ability to be brave in scary situations to start acting himself. They balance each other, which is why they are not a "we need them both in but let's make one more interesting and overshadow the other" ridiculousy, but a great match to lead, both having something the other is not very strong in or even lack.

Oh I was almost finishing this ✨️ted talk✨️ without mentioning his looks! He has the light brown hair from Jay, maybe even a little lighter than his because ✨️LIBBER'S GENES ENTER✨️ and mixes Jay's brown hair with her blonde. He has a mole on the side of his nose, and has a slightly tan skin, mixing Jay and Nya's skin colors. He is not that tall, let's say he is avarage. Liann, in comparison, is slightly taller than him. He also has a few iconic moles around his body too. Mostly the ones on his arms and a few small ones on his neck are the ones you easily notice. Though I doubt this works in a Lego format... ANYWAY!

Ok I don't know what else, I might add later!

[mellotronmkll]

I feel like I will never be a well rounded person cos it's just like an impossibility for me to be well rounded and have healthy habits cos like for example I just like do not sleep when I'm in the throes of a hyperfixation and it's so frustrating but even if I try to go to bed I just lay there with my mind going 3039383 miles a minute and I know from experience like I get suchhh bad insomnia it's so much easier to just give in and let myself stay up until 3 doing stupid shit sometimes. But like I have to get up at 6 tomorrow and I'm just like. But it's so overwhelming and so ridiculous how much it actually effects my life it literally feels like such a catastrophe cos like. I'm like this is bad timing!!!! I was doing better mentally!!!! I was seeing friends and going hiking and going to bed early and now it's all shot to hell because I suddenly remembered this band I used to be obsessed with and im like STOP! but i cannnnnnnot stop my mind and it's just makes me so AIAUEUEHEHEVEHDGEHSHDH. Like I just want to be someone who has normal hobbies and not have to constantly fight against their brain deciding that I can Only think about one thing and not do anything else because it would be fine if I didn't have to hold down a job but I do but I cannot function like a normal person. I have done no work at my job the last two days and I'm gonna end up getting no sleep and it's like how am I supposed to explain that to my employer. CAN I JUST CHILL? But no

[theatreofwysteria]

DOTTY having SO MUCH FUN (just like me. everyday is a fun day.) (except thats a LIE and im actually REALLY STRESSED)

anyways, i wont get into the details (except i will, i am a liar mueheh) becos the internet doesnt need to know how genshin impact is literally my only raison d'être. yes that sounds depressing. IT IS depressing. thats why i always try to cut my hyperfixes down the second they start cos ive been playing genshin since march5 2021 with no real break and it has done NUMBERS on my brain. i have severe social issues so i dont go out. all i know is genshin and its 🔥🔥so bad🔥🔥 which is why im always begging for friends so i dont lose touch 😭 (also emojis r working for me!!! yaay!!!) my own personal mortality is dawning on me as welll yippeeee hnnennnnn!!.!.!!.!.!. - yesterday i decided to help at tearoom!:! and today? becos of how little i do, my legs were shaking and painful the whole day. horrible. i need stuff to do because not only am i stuck in 4 (or 6 i suppose) walls all day, but also cage of my devices. the world is slipping out of my grasp because of the changing tides so much; to go out in public risks people recording my strange movements and laughing at it, to just go out into the garden is what i always do. to stay at home is the same as ever. im at a loss really and no amount of drawing dottore in bright colours can fix how quickly im fading out and away of society

maybe i should build a swing? i dont know how but i have a lot of dead trees and minimal talents + knowledge from design tech in middle school. should i build a nice swing?? :DDD

anyway, just like last post, i wanna show off some oc stuff that im proud of :D

characters today r wisteria (who my account is named after!! he's my dreaming partner), seraph, aria (again...) and march!!

[anti-endo-safe-space]

When i was younger, i used to get frustrated because my alters, henceforth referred to as guys (but in a gender neutral way), were not in my control.

I had the council, a group of them who were just chilling, but one of them didn't feal real and i couldnt figure out why. It drove me crazy because the others were just people in my head, but i wanted an older brother too and he wasnt doing it properly.

The same thing happened a few times later, with only one or two guys being real in a world that felt fake and flat in my own head. Sometimes i would get really invested into a show or piece of media, in my autistic way, and try so hard to have a character be real in my head, but i only ever got one, and that was completely due to a traumatic brain injury that happened to coincide.

Anyway, turns out i have osdd, and a very high split tolerance. And i know from experience that its impossible to hyper-fixate your way into an introject or fictive. I stumbled into a few of my guys, but it was never the ones i expected and honestly, most of the time they are terribly unhappy about it.

I tried so hard, so often. Honestly, i wish i could just have control over them. I wished i could merge some of them, create others, or switch on comand, co-front, or even be able to tell whos whos every day.

But apparently thats a privilege for the endos /sarcastic

Low spoons so not a huge answer but

We're sorry you had to go through that. We hope things system wise can get better.

Some systems have more introjects and stuff from hyperfixations but that's not how they all work and that's okay.

We get wanting that control, at least from our end we can't force someone to front or merge or anything, they just do what they want.

Endos do tend to think that's hwo it works sadly

Sorry if this isn't well worded, physical issues acting up here but we hear you

[creepylittlelady]

I am so desperate to share these so, Slenderman Headcanons [PUPPET STRINGS LORE DUMP]

Okay so I wanted to wait until the day someone asked about Slenderman and Zalgo's characterisation in my AU, but I don't know when that time will come and I seriously NEED to share this with all of you.

This AU has been in the works since 2016 and has been my number 1 hyperfixation, and Slenderman is one characters that I had the most fun making. I love love LOVE every rendition of him, from Your Dad Slenderman to EVIL MANIPULATIVE ELDRITCH MONSTER. I want to give homage to both of these renditions by bringing in my own Slender to the mix! I hope you like it, because Zalgo will get his own post very soon ;)

I'm currently writing his backstory on AO3! Chapter 5 should be up soon ;)

As I've said previously, Slenderman and Zalgo are my favourite characters! I just wanna lore dump about him right now because BRAINROT BRAINROT BRAINROT

So without further ado...

The "Slenderman"

-He's not actually one being or entity, although he'd like you to believe otherwise. He's actually a hivemind of two consciousnesses; Lord Operator, and the Vengeful Spirit Charles.

-Slenderman is actually just the body that's basically holding these two entities hostage, technically. Neither of them can escape, although they've definitely tried. Multiple times. Slenderman doesn't have a consciousness of his own and is just a horrifying mixture of the two of them combined into one.

-NEITHER OF THEM ARE HAVING A FUN TIME. They hate it and will go to great lengths to get out. His brain is just the two of them arguing about who gets to control the body at any given moment, and they both have ulterior motives of their own.

-A little backstory: Charles, the Vengeful Spirit, was sacrificed to the Operator and made a deal with him that he would allow himself to be used a Vessel in exchange for his lifespan to be elongated. However over the years Operator began to use Charles' body for more and more depraved purposes. Eventually this drove him insane and caused him to kill himself. However at that point the Operator was so co-dependant on his soul that it basically killed it too, and it had to use some of its remaining abilities to create a new body so that neither of them would really die.

-When Charles is fully in control, he is a 'decently' humane being and can sometimes even be a Father Figure to some of the residents of the Mansion. However he still retains some of his negative traits from life, such as being nihilistic and at times selfish. He's sociopathic as a joke and mainly spends his days trying desperately to fix whatever things he did when the Operator took over.

-When it's Charles, he actually has a good relationship with all of the Residents, and has more of a sit-com Boss-Employee relationship with the Proxies, often laughing at their misfortune. Although he and Sally argue a lot Sally is very close to him when he's Charles.

The same thing cannot be said for when its the Operator.

-The Operator first and foremost is a former God. Although it wasn't a very well-known God, it still said a web of loyal worshippers. However ever since its power was (mostly) stripped away and had to unwillingly transport itself into this new body, its hated every second of it there. The reasons why the Proxies exist in the first place is to create new followers for it so it can gain more power.

-It's absolutely HORRIBLE to everyone else when it takes over. He's mentally and physically abusive, lashing out at everyone who dares disobey it. Its manipulative as well, and the Pastas who are sensitive to that thing, like Toby, Natalie etc often lock themselves away when its taken over.

-Several rooms that Charles doesn't know the purpose of are usually used by the Operator to torture the residents into submission. There are multiple Basements and secret rooms that its locked people inside to get them to 'obey' its command.

-Several of the Slenderverse stories, like Marble Hornets happened when the Operator took over. It often goes unconscious again and leaves Slenderman to deal with the consequences.

(Okay to explain, when I talk about the Operator specifically I'll refer to it as 'Operator', but when its Charles I'll refer to him as Slenderman, Slender, Slendy etc).

-Slenderman is not having a fun time. Random people keep on confronting him and coming up to him when he has no idea who they are and why they're here. He has NO idea on who Toby, Masky or Hoodie are nor how they ended up here. However he's apathetic to it and decided to be decent to them for as long as he's the one in charge of the Slenderman body.

-Whenever the Operator becomes too violent, Zalgo has to come and knock it out. Yep, Zalgo has to beat the shit out of it and basically chain Slender up to get it out, or at least sedate it enough so that it doesn't do anything violent.

-Remember how I mentioned how they've both desperately tried to leave? Yeah, the Slenderman body is fucking terrifying to look at naked. Its severely malnourished, with bruises, shock wounds, stab wounds, slash wounds, cilice wounds and just open wounds EVERYWHERE. They've both tried to leave by any means necessary, and are slowly killing the vessel to try and escape.

-More lore important characters such as Zalgo, Lazari, EJ and Ben sort deal with problems like this as well. But Jesus fucking Christ is Slenderman having a horrible time. He has to basically deal with his own Slender Sickness (Slender Sickness actually comes from the Operator, since most mortals can't perceive Gods without their bodies basically shutting down).

-If Masky and Hoodie are slowly going insane from Slender Sickness, Slender is basically killing himself from it. He's always on the verge of psychosis, suffering from some kind of really disgusting illness, or otherwise just not having a great time. The body is a-okay when its the Operator, but when its Slenderman he's just not having fun.

-Its basically eternal damnation being stuck in that body. Its like an eternal punishment of lies and deceit, waking up every day not knowing that tortures you'll suffer through. However since this has been going on for about 123 years now, they're both used to it at this point.

-Due to being used as vessel and basically being trapped in an endless cycle of torment since the ripe age of 11, Slender's a bit apathetic to the Proxies' situation.

For Example:

Masky: You do realise that we're all suffering because of you, right? Slender: It's not even that deep Timothy we all get mentally and physically imprisoned by a nonhuman Entity at times you just have to deal with it. Masky: Slender, are you okay? Slender: *vomits out a dead corpse* yes why wouldn't I be.

Although he does feel remorse for the fact that Masky, Hoodie and Toby's situation will probably never improve due to the Operator basically holding them captive at the Labrinth, he just doesn't feel that much sympathy for them, as that idea of being used for an upper beings entertainment is just normalised to him.

-Despite the fact that some of the Pastas call him dad are nice to him, a lot of them hate him. Some of the ghost kids refuse to go near him due to the Operator's actions, and his brothers are all scared of him, although Operator cut contact with them years ago.

-One bittersweet tidbit: Slenderman has tentacles because it represents Charles' favourite animal; Octopi.

Okay that's like the only sweet headcanon I have for this guy.

-Slender isn't a good person even though he's a lot better than Operator, although he is actively trying to be a better person for the Pastas' benefit, due to being a vengeful spirit he's definitely prone to violent fits. He can and will hurt you if you agitate him enough, even though it doesn't happen often.

-The Slenderman Vessel is incredibly unstable, so neither of them know their own strength. Because of this, Slender has accidentally flung Toby out of a window more times than he would care to admit.

Also sometimes it just doesn't do what it's told? There's like a 5% chance that it just doesn't teleport where you want it to at any given point, which is very inconvenient.

-Often times when Slender knows the Operator is about to take over (he doesnt' really have a choice on when it happens), he just leaves the Labrinth. He usually stays in Zalgo's castle for months, even a year on end. Yes, the Operator can stay for THAT long.

Do any of the other Residents know?

-As a general rule of thumb; no, they don't. Neither Charles nor the Operator will tell, and even when Charles tries to explain whats happening the Operator will ALWAYS stop him by any means necessary.

Once, he tried to explain what happened after disappearing for half a year, but the Operator had forcibly forced his body to shut down, so he was just sitting there unconscious.

Slender: It all started when I was 11 years o- *starts choking* Hoodie: Oh my god is he having a stroke Slender: *is just unconscious sitting in his chair* Masky: Does this mean Payday is getting delayed or do I still get a raise? Toby: Man wtf

-Due to this unpredictability on whether they'll get 'Nice Slender' or 'Mean Slender' at any given moment, most of the Pastas are dead terrified of him. Although they won't show it sometimes when they see him ominously walking the halls at night or if he doesn't show up for breakfast that morning they all subconsciously start worrying that the Mean Slender's back.

-Sally is especially terrified of him. Slender brought her to the Mansion out of the Operator's wishes, which he HATES. Everytime the Operator comes out he tries to actively harm Sally, which is why she hides in her room for months on end or runs to the back end of the forest.

-Ben, EJ and Lazari all kind of understand whats happening, at least they have a semblance of an idea. Toby knows for the most part due to doing some snooping. However nobody else has a clue and it will probably stay like that for a long time.

[heymacy]

hiii macy! I just wanted to say quick that my shameless hyperfixation faded around last year and didn’t know how to say it cos I felt like I was the only one of my shameless moots that had that happen at the time 😣 but just now seeing that you’re having similar thoughts, idk it made me feel like I wasn’t the only one thinking this, and I didn’t know a way to say that I wasn’t as into the show as before and I didn’t mean to go AWOL but I still love interacting with everyone 💝 (sorry this became a small vent) 💓

lyle my love! it's so good to hear from you! i hope you're doing so well and that life is treating you kindly 💛 never apologize for small vents, i love vents of all shapes and sizes!

something i'm beginning to realize as i get older and have more years of lived experience under my belt is that everything has its season. i think that as a society we tend to try and define ourselves so profoundly by our interests and hobbies in order to either self-actualize or to brand ourselves (capitalism, i'm lookin' at you) and that makes it hard to feel like it's okay to outgrow things and move on if it no longer lights up that pleasure center in your brain. but it is okay! because everything is temporary and nothing lasts forever and that's not a bad thing! and we can still carry parts of those experiences and those eras of our lives with us into our next chapter, whether that be the people or the memories or our obtained skills or what have you. i think moving on is natural and shouldn't be seen as some sort of failing, you know? like oh, if i just try a little bit harder, maybe it will spark for me again. that was me for a long time, and you simply cannot force joy! i'm sorry that you felt like you couldn't be open about your waning interest in the show but i promise you are not alone. a lot of people have come and gone even just in the time i've been here and i think that is normal and healthy. so here's to moving forward, together! the love will always be there, as will the memories. ily and i'm excited to hang out with you as we step into our new chapters ✨

[valeriianz]

20 questions for fic writers!

tagged by @honeyteacakes <3 (and belatedly, @tharkuun haha)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

25

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

400,576 (+ 100k extra from fics i've deleted/orphaned in the past few years haha rip)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

i am at the mercy of the hyperfixation, and currently it's The Sandman and Dreamling exclusively.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) Salvation (How to Get Away With Murder) 2) The Red Witch (Good Omens) 3) Bolt in the Blue (The Sandman) 4) Let Me Down Easy (The Sandman) 5) Show Me (The Mandalorian)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yes and no. i love that people take the time to show their appreciation for a fic and i always want to reply and show how much it means to me... but i have this bad habit of not replying to comments on say, older works or older chapters of a fic. idk why... im just not good at it lol BUT I LOVE AND APPRECIATE EVERY SINGLE COMMENT, EVEN THE LITTLE ONES 💖💖

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh, Exit Wounds, for sure haha

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

im a sucker for happy endings so i'd say, everything else lol but particularly Almost Idyllic (The Song of Achilles) due to the build up and Salvation also, because of the events leading up to the ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not since my ff.net days haha.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

very occasionally. and nothing too wild (except for that dreamling butt plug one. that was. hmm.) but i typically enjoy writing first times.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

i do not.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope. though i have seen ideas/prompts used without credit. it doesn't bother me much.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

once, The Red Witch (which btw has been discontinued, pls don't read it lol). it started off just me, then my editor jumped on maybe 5 chapters in once i realized they were much more versed in magick and fantasy than me.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

haha probably Zutara.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

ahhh haha... fuck. idk i want to say none. but my brain keeps whispering about the dreamling road trip au. i thought i had a plot but as i continue working on bitb and other little drabbles... ive realized i might've bitten off more than i can chew. and my only option is to completely sideline it until im done with bitb, or change the story (because right now the research i have to do for it is too much and y'all know how i am...) it sucks cos i do want to write it. but it's difficult when all my patience for research is already going into one fic (bitb).

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue and monologuing, probably.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

self 👏 motivation 👏 finding 👏 the 👏 urge 👏 to 👏 write (technically, it's tense. i flip between past and present tense constantly and at this point i just consider it one of my endearing qualities pfft)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i try to avoid it but when it happens i just use Google Translate and then toss a disclaimer that ive done my best (to which usually a commenter will helpfully correct me and then all is well)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Inuyashaaaaa (Miroku/Sango omg). exchanging physical notebooks with my friends with fanfics we'd written in school lol

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

truly a tie between Savory & Sweet and Let Me Down Easy (at the moment). the restaurant au was so easy and fun to write (probably because i used to be in the industry) and i reread it a lot. the pacing is fast and i love how immediate Hob and Dream fall into each other haha. Let Me Down Easy was very similar. my major was Media Production in undergrad and although it's been a while since i've held a camera, it was fun putting myself back in that environment. also the angst and tension were just a blast to write and figure out.

(this was an excellent waste of time, thanks again!) tagged, if y'all want, @magnusbae @teejaystumbles @ml-nolan @tj-dragonblade @reallyintoscience @delta-pavonis @staroftheendless

[blackwatervial]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @returning-spring thank you so much I was hoping to do this! Which is why I tag every fic writer who reads this!

How many works do you have on AO3? 81. Which is. Hysterical, considering I really only started writing in 2020

What's your total AO3 word count? .....1,404,904. As I said. Hysterical. Girl, where do you find the time???

What fandoms do you write for? I mostly only write for one fandom at a time because my brain can only take so many hyperfixations (1), and at the moment it's Baldur's Gate. After spending over a year in VegasPete land

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? First Impressions (WenZhou, 4.6k) A Sip of Vinegar (WenZhou, 4.1k) Spilled Wine (VegasPete, 2.7k) If you're trouble (WenZhou, 2.1k) Improvisation & Bad Decisions (WenZhou, 1.8k)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes I do, or at least I try to! Even though I mostly reply with any variation of "Aaaahhh thank you!!!", I want readers to know I read their comments & they make me very happy. Because I do, and they do.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Stories from a Lonely City. It's XueXiao, difficult to not get angsty with them

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I mean, most of my endings are happy...Probably The Essence of Flame and Frost (WeiLan) bc I wrote an entire 15k epilogue specifially to make them happy

Do you get hate on fics? I once got a hate comment...it was hilarious. I cherish it to this day. It shows me my fic bothered someone so much that they had to take time out of their day to tell me about it!

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I can read smut (occasionally, while skipping through it), but I'm too ace to write it....big nerf.

Do you write crossovers? Only when I'm in the mood for crack and the fandoms fit really well together. I wrote 2 crossovers I think.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? No.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, multiple, and I'm super honoured bc I know how difficult translating is.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, but my beta is helping me so much with brainstorming and fixing plotholes!

What's your all-time favorite ship? I don't really have one, they change over time. And while I cherish the memory of older ships, none has stayed with me. When we talk about the most intense ones, it's WeiLan (Guardian) and VegasPete (KPTS)

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? SandRay Fake Dating AU. Sorry friends, that one's off the table.

What are your writing strengths? I like to think I write somewhat nice dialogues. Also plays on words.

What are your writing weaknesses? Oh my god outlining my eternal nemesis. I just can't do it. Even if I attempt to, I always go off the rails. Extremely problematic when it comes to long fics. Also action scenes are difficult. Smut is impossible.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Not sure what this asks?

First fandom you wrote for? Ahahahah the good old days of Metal Gear Solid fanfic! Very nostalgic.

Favorite fic you've written? Error in the Code, no competition. This fic means so much to me on so many levels.

[oneofthosebells]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @malinthebodyguard for tagging me! 💜💜 I'm not really on tumblr much at the moment for various reasons, but I can never resist a quiz.

(It's not a secret that oneofthosebells is a burner pseud I created just to write YR fic for Reasons I won't bore you with here, so the below is combined across pseuds.)

How many works do you have on Ao3?

67 (25 fics, 41 vids, 1 podfic)

What's your total Ao3 word count?

Just over 430,000

What fandoms do you write for?

I tend to be monofannish, so only Young Royals right now! My main fandom for a few years before that was Ballum (an EastEnders pairing), and I've written for various other sources over the last 20 years including several one-off fics in tiny fandoms for Yuletide.

Top five fics by kudos:

Incognito Mode - Young Royals

Salt and Vinegar - Ballum

Easy to Love - Ballum

The Picture Thou Hast Made - Ballum

Breaking News, Breaking Free - Young Royals

(Taking the executive decision to exclude my 20-year-old Harry Potter fics from the list above because...well. You know. I won't delete them from the internet because I don't believe in doing that, but honestly, if anyone's still reading them in 2024, ngl, kind of judging you. There are SO MANY fics out there not based on books written by massive transphobes, go read those.)

Do you respond to comments?

Usually! I tend to be all or nothing - I try to reply to every comment, but if I'm struggling to keep up, I sometimes end up not replying to any at all for a few weeks and then it feels daft to reply after that long.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

None! I don't like angsty endings, happy endings all the way round here. Probably the only one that even vaguely counts is Say a Little Prayer, which is a missing moment from canon from a very angsty episode - but even though it ends on a sad note, if you know the show you know they get married a few days later so it's still not that angsty.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hoping that if I can get my writing brain into gear I will soon be able to give several YR fic answers to this question...!

From my non-YR fics...almost all of them? But let's say Beginner's Luck because of the light-hearted romcom vibes throughout. (Or maybe My Heart Won't Let My Feet Do Things They Should Do, because it's not just happy from a ship pov, but also has a character coming to terms with his hearing loss, taking up dance again for the first time since he was 12 AND standing up to his homophobic, ableist dad.)

Do you get hate on fics?

Not recently, doesn't seem to be much of a thing in YR fandom thank goodness! In the past...yeah. (Soap opera fandom is toxic af.)

Do you write smut?

Yep. Not very well. 😂 I put it in stories that seem to need it, but mostly I tend to go for a M rating rather than E because it's really not in my comfort zone to write the explicit stuff. Never written PWP. (I tried to, once, but it ended up full of feelings and a bit of plot anyway!)

Craziest crossover:

Never written a crossover, never really wanted to. I keep my fandoms separate lol.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hope not! Not aware of it if so.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I'd love to. Me and a friend kicked around an idea a few times, but never came to anything.

All time favourite ship?

Eep. Please don't hate me if I don't say Wilmon! I love them to pieces, I really do, but honestly I hyperfixated on their story and the show as a whole rather than them as a couple if that makes sense (which is probably why I don't really read/write non-royal AUs).

Gun to my head, all time favourite ship: Christian/Syed from EastEnders.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

There are many YR WIPs on my hard drive, but honestly I'm still hoping to finish all of them one day! So I'll say Not Giving In, which I do really want to finish but alas canon kind of killed my love for the characters (especially Jay who plays a big part in the last few chapters), so chances are high I never will. Will be the first and probably only fic I'll ever properly abandon, which I feel gutted about. Blegh.

What are your writing strengths?

Oh god, what a horrible question. 💀 Probably dialogue? Keeping a plot moving along? And people usually seem to like my characterisation, I've had comments in previous fandoms along the lines of 'could be an actual episode of the show' (which I'm taking as a compliment rather than a dig at my unoriginality lol).

What are your writing weaknesses?

Beautiful prose. Metaphor, simile, imagery, description, all of that. None of that's in my wheelhouse at all. If I could get away with writing fics that were 95% dialogue and 5% 'shrugs, nods, stands up, sits down' stage directions I absolutely would.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Eh, I'm not a big fan. With YR fics, I kind of take the view that if you're writing in English, you're essentially translating the entire fic from Swedish into English anyway - so why leave the odd phrase untranslated? It's distracting more than anything else. But it's not a red line or anything, I don't mind it too much in other people's fics.

First fandom you wrote in?

I won't lie: alas, Harry Potter. See above for my feelings on that now.

Favourite fic you've written?

No false modesty here, it's this one: The Picture Thou Hast Made. I wish I'd given it a better title lol as it might have got more attention, but super proud of this fic, probably my best ever attempt at balancing humour, fluff and angst. (Cough, it's an AU that's probably still enjoyable without any canon knowledge, just saying.)

Mind you, one of the YR WIPs currently lurking in my hard drive might just push it into second place... 👀

No pressure tags:

Hmm, lots of people seem to have already done this one! How about @piebingo and @peakotp (no pressure at all) or anyone else who'd like to and hasn't been tagged yet.

[broodsys]

got tagged by @plisuu, thank you again! this'll be fun >)

tagging hmmm lemme see... @jazzmckay | @streganicha | @jellydishes but as ever no pressure uwu also trying to not tag Everyone i know so other ppl can continue to pass it around lmao

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

55!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

299,998. okay that's amusing i'm glad i looked. i'm two words away from 300k lmfao

3. What fandoms do you write for?

99% dai, with a tinyyy bit of da2. also one fic (that has totally fucked up my stats page bc it's a much more popular fandom) for pkmn: sun and moon (anime) and one for cagaster of an insect cage (anime). my old deleted ao3 had more fandoms, the other big ones being les mis (movie) and inception

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

we're the last to know (pkmn sumo, little cutesy ash/kiawe thing)

sleep just a little longer (solavellan somno smut lmao)

the hidden mage (fenders during dai timeline)

domitable (solavellan smut with solas domming for once)

a matter of taste (solavellan smut where solas is encouraged to figure out his own interests)

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes! sometimes it takes me a bit but i always reply. if it's a long/thoughtful/specific comment i also try to address a bit of what the commenter brings up :')

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh that's maybe a day to die for sure. wrote that back in my first dai hyperfix period after it had come out, this is a bad end au where they get stuck in the magic future

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

my longing series comes to mind. nessa lavellan/solas. it was also my first venture back into seriously writing fic and my first dai fic ever since i got back into my hyperfix :')

8. Do you get hate on fics?

none yet, luckily

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

lmao yes i write so much smut. um... what kind indeed? i'll just say it's very character-driven - not always stuff i'm personally interested in, but hey, if it works for them, good. i shall write the thing. i write a lot of different kinks

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

none i can think of... although i do have an outline for a dragon age characters in the star trek universe fic lmao

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge, but i don't go looking, either

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

one, yes!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no. considered it at times, but it seems kinda awkward

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

all time....? well i'll say that the ship i've sailed the longest has been fenders fr

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

the fucking. cagaster of an insect cage one. god. i keep thinking about it and fanfic is nonexistent so i feel extra compelled to finish my fic for them but i just have like 0 interest. da took my entire brain over (again)

16. What are your writing strengths?

hmm... your boy can sure write some character introspection!!! honestly tho, one of the things i'm proudest about in my writing is my ability to match the tone to the fic or character pov

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

action scenes, especially fight scenes :x i can do them but they take soooo much longer than anything else and it's an uphill battle (heh) the whole way

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

while i wouldn't write another real language in fic, if it's a fan language (like project elvhen) then i sometimes include short pieces if they're different from what would normally be spoken. so like... arlathan era fic, no, i'm not going to include stuff from project elvhen bc everyone's speaking elvhen all the time. but if it's during dai era or smth and they're speaking common with the occasional elvhen word/phrase thrown in, then i'd add the word/phrase and define it at the bottom

19. First fandom you wrote for?

da2!

20. Favorite fic you've written?

that's gotta be from my bigfic series, antiquation :') specifically i think part 5, paradigm shift, is my favorite of the whole series uwu

template under the cut!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5. Do you respond to comments?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16. What are your writing strengths?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

20. Favorite fic you've written?

[mcrmadness]

001 About Richy and Igor

002 About Igor specifically (wanna hear your thoughts about him in depth :D)

003 about Monty Python characters? if it's even possible?

(I would gladly hear you on 001 about FuB, but as I'm being absolutely too much, I can understand that you don't do it. It's extra content :D)

((Also, you are free to answer to this ask for only one ask and do the others on separate posts for more clarity !))

I reblogged this ask game before reading any of the questions, and after receiving your ask, I read them and now I have to say that my questions are probably gonna be very, VERY underwhelming ::D So don't get too excited, cos I don't think I'm able to give you the type of answers you might be interested in reading :D But I'll try anyway, but know that you're been warned: boredom alert!!!

001 | Richy & Igor

when I started shipping it if I did: Must have been in 2009 when I found out about die ärzte for the first time. I watched every video I could find, including Richy Guitar. At first I didn't really care about the film, and I wasn't exactly shipping R/I but more of obsessing with the clips because of my new Bela/Farin obsession. I got way more into the ship only during the past 2 or 3 years, when I also started writing fanfiction about them, and then it evolved into drawing doodles and comics too.

my thoughts: Uh, what can I say? Head empty, no thoughts. My brain keeps hyperfixating on this ship for no good reason.

What makes me happy about them: Nothing.

What makes me sad about them: Nothing.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: Anything that doesn't align with my own headcanons or is too far away from the actual canon.

things I look for in fanfic: Nothing. Because it doesn't exist, so I have already given up.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: No one else.

My happily ever after for them: Idk.

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Idk.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Canon? Music. My headcanons? Fast food.

---

002 | Igor

How I feel about this character: Idk.

All the people I ship romantically with this character & My non-romantic OTP for this character: I honestly don't know if it's romantic or queerplatonic or just platonic, but I only ship him with Richard.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I have none. I don't think there are even popular opinions about this character out there.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I wish to know where does he live. I keep thinking about that caravan inside the abandoned factory, and I keep headcanoning it as Igor's residence but I wish I knew whose place that actually was (the other option is Hans, but yeah, it's never revealed in the film).

my OTP: Richy/Igor lol

my cross over ship: None.

a headcanon fact: He's head over heels for Richard whether that be platonic or not.

---

003 | send me 5 characters and I will rank them in order of preference

You asked about Monty Python characters. I guess it is possible, but just very very difficult because there are not that many reoccuring characters, and the Flying Circus show ran for 4 seasons and there are several films, so the character count could be in hundreds tbh. Often the skits are also more about the joke and topic and less about characters, even when they're often given names. But as I'm writing this, I can feel a potential list cooking inside my head so, here we go!

The Gumbys. My favourite quote comes from these skits: "My brain hurts!" I can't find that as a gif now, but they are these extremely, extremely stupid characters who shout every line of theirs cos they are so dumb. Here's the Brain Specialist skit where that quote is from too :D

2. The Hell's Grannies. This is just the funniest shit ever and I absolutely love the graffiti they paint as a graffiti and which goes: "Make tea, not love." Here's a link to a video on youtube.

3. Anne Elk (Miss). I just keep rewatching this skit over and over again cos it's so stupid, and the characters just interact with each other in such a funny way, and Graham's character's reactions to Anne Elk are so funny :D

4. Pontius Pilate in Life of Brian. Ok this movie is full of extremely funny characters, and I would like to mention a handful of others, such as the deaf and stupid character and his companion who's stuttering the whole time; and also that man in the pit who hadn't talked at all until Brian accidentally jumped on his foot. But I still have to give this place for Michael Palin's Pontius Pilate just for that Biggus Dickus scene cos it's probably the funniest movie scene I have ever seen. Palin often had the funniest characters, and it's even funnier when you know that the extras and other actors didn't know about his lines so if I'm correct, all of those laughters were genuine reactions to Palin's acting, and he also was so close to losing it at one point :D

5. And you know what? I just HAVE TO link here the French Taunting scene from Monty Python & the Holy Grail, just for you XD "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!" kills me every time.

+ And you get an extra just because you're French, this skit and their accents in this sometimes live rent free in my head :D

THANK YOU so much for the ask btw! I decided to skip the 001 about FUB cos my answers would have not been much different from the RG one, apart from real people not having a canon, and me not really having any headcanons for them for that same reason. So, it would have not really added anything, or would have been even less than what I now got for the answers for R/I.

Funnily enough, I got way more out of Monty Python. It just shows how I don't get attached to characters really, but live for and from humour, and anything that's funny af to me, I like and makes me happy.

[ace-sher-bi-john]

Me, feeling lonely: I should try to make more friends

My brain: Here's a list of all the reasons why we don't do that,

I experience hyperfixations which take up all of my mental energy to the point where I barely have enough energy to take care of myself. I can't handle having more than two obsessions at a time, and even that is draining. When my friends talk about their obsessions, I try really hard to listen, but lose interest quickly if it's not my current hyperfixation. In turn, I love to infodump and obsess over small details in my hyperfixations. I try really hard not to do this when talking to people because it feels very self-centered. Like they would care about hearing every single detail about my obsession, with no room for them to talk about their interests...

I'm an introvert and find human interaction exhausting unless that person is my mom (who I could literally talk to all day and never be tired, and she in turn would never tire of talking to me). Even talking to friends online is super exhausting and I overthink everything I say, which is even more exhausting

I have zero ability to gage how close I am to someone. I don't want to make things awkward by being super clingy, because several friendships failed throughout my life due to me being clingy and only wanting to play with one specific person even if they didn't feel like playing with me. So I've overcorrected and now I don't make any attempts to progress in our friendship out of fear of appearing clingy. I'm either the most clingy friend or the most distant friend. Friendships require a healthy balance of both and I am incapable of that, so I go for the option that will be seen as the least annoying/selfish and we remain at best really good acquaintances

My interests are very specific and change every couple of months. Even if I found someone who was obsessed with the same thing at the same time, as well as my more niche hobbies, the friendship would last as long as my hyperfixation. Once we no longer share common interests, I would inevitably talk to them less and less until one day, we're no longer friends. My brain would no longer find that person interesting and I would forget about them

I believe that I have it in me to be a really good friend. To get it right. But it would be at the cost of myself. I would try to make enough room in my brain for everyone else's lives and I wouldn't have any interests of my own. I would constantly be exhausted.

So instead I choose the option that sometimes makes me happiest, but other times leaves me sad and lonely wondering why I can't just be better at being a good friend?

I do have friends IRL. I have four people who I would consider to be close friends, possibly even best friends? Two of them have given me the label of being their best friend. But I don't talk to them as often as I probably should. I talk to one of them almost daily for hours at a time, because they just so happen to be obsessed with BBC Sherlock, the MCU and cosplay. But I fear that the second my BBC Sherlock obsession ends, I will stop talking to them.

Outside of those people, I don't know where I stand with anyone who's not family. I have my old classmates from high school. Some of them I talked to every day and had friendly interactions with, but I don't make any effort to stay in contact with them now and didn't feel much of a connection with when we were in school. I have my co-workers who I don't feel much of a connection to, but they're always happy to see me and sometimes interact with me in a way that makes me feel like we're friends. One of my co-workers hugged me before she went home on the day before she started her holiday break because she was going to miss seeing me everyday while she was off. That caught me off guard. I guess we're friends if she felt close enough to me to hug me?

Apologies for the rant. I just really needed to put that somewhere. I won't make a habit of this.

[cutepastelstarsalior]

Clone high season 2 live blogging

Episode 6

:( the dinner is going to be sold

Yeah I can see why some people don’t like the dinner because of the racial segregation….

Did some guy just buy to eat the dead wife????

👀 disabled Joan!??? Let’s goooooo!!!!! Detective Joan!!!! Awe cute Joan had a cat <3

“Psylly legs is build up nostalgia the legs get psylly”

….So Joan is just stimming???? (I thought she’d had restless leg syndrome)

If people bullied Joan because of her medical stuff, why didn’t Joan help Ghandi when people hated on him for his adhd? Also man does this town have an ableist history…..

Blood pack!!!!! Same big mood with the doctor not handling blood 😩

Yay Joan’s weird French films!!!! DAVID FUCKING TENNANT???!!!!!! <3 ohmgggg I love him as 10

Heyyy trash Mandy Moore lady is back!! :0

Did I meant I love the colors in this show? I do…

Noooooo jfk cheating on Joan? Wait…or not? Hmmm I feel like kissing another girl is bad…..FUCK is this is Total Drama and the Bridgette and Geoff scene >:( damn it!!! (Yes I know that they are 2 different shows but listen……hyperfixation™️ also my mom thought CH was TD lol)

Yay jfk and Harriet told Joan the truth….oh no Joan is going through so many emotions and drinking :0 hmmm 👀 (idk why but the little montage of Joan going rapid through different emotions feels like something bpd???)

Episode 7

Confucius parents took his sister to Bali but not him :( awwww his family didn’t care if he got lost in the dessert. Man Confucius family sucks, no wonder he tried to hard to be popular online, he just wanted attention :(

:( Abe and Joan army friends anymore noooo. Damn. Abe lost Joan and Ghandi, this dude is going through it….

My favorite background clone is Cathrine the Great, I think her design is so cute <3

The bus crash and now JFK brain is bigger….i think you have internal bleeding there bud…

“As a woke straight male ally let me put my lips on this unconscious black women to show how woke and straight I am” ……..topher bud….

Why is George Washtion Clever peanut man getting bigger??

Mr b using a short to cover his head <3

Ew why is jfk vice like that….

“Lo-fi haunted ghost screams” 👀

Smart jfk…Joan taking the lead. I feel like something bad will happen OR this is a dream.

:0 DJ Mr b!!!!!!

Cannibal dessert zombies….. scary!!

JFK calling people darling is cute :) <3

If jfk brain is smarter while in hot weather/if he’s overheating why didn’t this happen when he’s in the gym or doing sports? 👀

Smart jfk face : ☺️🫤

The husbands trying to snort each other 😏👀

Arroyo are gully in southwestern us….meaning the clone home is somewhere between Texas and California….

Joan wants someone who is emotionally intelligent and emotionally available….she and Abe become friends again……I’m guess they’ll end up together?

Episode 8

Oh snap they actually broke up! Also they co-own a tortoise? Cute

..,,,making the whole school sexual……😬 interesting…

“Where do you want the seaman to drop their load”

“For starters in my mouth” HA….🫵🤨 I know what you are doc

Frida having a crush on Cleo! Was not expecting that…Cleo doing her weird flirting again…was DEFINITELY not expecting that….

Harriet x Confucius is a cute ship….their such nerds <3

😬😬😬 the teacher flirting with Abe…:ma’am that not ok

“Virginity is a social construct” asexual Abe real!!!!!!!

I was going to say seaman I love you but I realize that sounds absolutely horrible out of context….

Singing pirates I love you and you talking about lgbt identity..

Topher the pirates thing you’re into Abe….. 👀

JOAN DONT PUT THE TOURTISE IN THE WATER JOAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!!!!! Oh thank goodness Abe rescued the pet

“It’s ok if a minor and a teacher are together” not the fuck it’s not lady!!! Topher why are you filming this???? Call the police????? Topher please 😬😬

Oh thank god she dead. But ahhhhhhhh still hella uncomfortable!!!!!!!!!

The “statutory-rape-death-by-orgasm situation is very troubling” MR B WITH THE FACTS!!!!!!

“So we’re not telling the police?” You can Mr b! Please call the police. Mr b I love you so much for looking out for the students.

Topjer blackmailing Abe because he (topher) is into Joan…..🤨🤨 are you topher?? Are you really??

One one hand, I’m like this is a stupid subplot, Abe just tell Joan how you feel who care about topher and his blackmail. But on the other hand, this situation kind of feels realistic? Like a weird way to talk about victim blaming?

Oh thank god something positive in this shit show….yippie Cleo and Frida got together!!!

Joan underwater with the emotional music…her screaming underwater…..cinema™️ :) Joan and jfk having a nice talk :)…:noooo rip Shelly the tortoise

Background gay couple yay :)

Episode 9

Noooo the husbands are fighting AGAIN….oh yay Joan and Mr b time!!!

Omg Mr b lore!!!!

He has a human twin brother??? HES RELIGIOUS????? Oh snap biracial Mr b 👀

Wait nevermind…. Awww Mr b didn’t know he was a robot :( and nether did his twin

:( noooooooo!!!!!!!! He left his brother 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

OH MY FUCKING GOD Mr b was a sex worker

Noooo Mr b please contact your brother!!!!!

Awew yay Mr b life getting better!!! :0 he got married!!!

Noooo his wife cheated on his and his son wasn’t biological his!!! :(

YES!!!! The twins reunited!!! :0 awew he’s an uncle now!!! Wow 2 nices and 2 nephews!!

NOOOOOOOOOOO HES BROTHER DIED!!!!!!

👀 Mr b was an actor!!!!

🥺 awww he thinks of Joan as his daughter!!!!!!

NO MR B DONT DO IT!!!!!!!!

Oh thank god doc saved him!!!!!!! 🥺

Oh my goddd…..the cliff!!! The choices!!!!!!!

THETE FAMILY AND HE CRIED!!!!

Favorite episode!!!!!!!!

Episode 10

Oh thank god, it’s the last one!!!!

Ponce’s dad is back!!! :)

It’s the last day of the school year…the teens are 16, so there sophomores???

Clone high college :0 oh!!! I was wonder what would happen to the senior class!!

West Dakota?????

Since the sisters didn’t make it into the death maze, do they life? Get immediate killed? I forgot that the government is trying to groom the most successful clones. So I guess this is a survival of the fittest….and since the OG clones were from the first project, this is a very new things. (Trying to make a mental timeline thing.)

The four amgias….

NOOOOO VINCENT DIED (maybe not?)

4 boys who are friends-ish

4 girls who are friends

Battle of the sexist 👀

Also both groups are the main cast….ok not topher he’s more of a side character…but still..

Yay Abe and jfk friendship :)

Ok so this is my 2 favorite episode.

This gives me minor hunger games vibes. The whole government watching kids fight to the death part; not the trying to stop the government and corrupt dystopia part…

Oh hey! That weird one type flute thing, forgot about that! :)

Frida has 2 different shoelaces :)

Joan leaving the group because Frida chose her girlfriend over Joan. I mean, that understanding to be angry, but I don’t think she should leave the group….

Yessss jfk breaking topher phone!! :) now Abe won’t be blackmail anymore!!!

Gay energy jfk x Abe

Lone wolf Joan….hmm maybe she is the most powerful/sussefual clone they made? 👀

Joan setting traps to capture her friends!!!! She IS the most dangerous clone!!!

Ok Joan keeps putting people into holes, either she doing that so she the only one to hit the button and go to college OR she doing that to save everyone from the death maze?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHJHH Joan foster mom standing by Joan, using her daughter and grooming her to be the next leader!!! AHHHHHH I love it!!!!!!! Sidhaisn

!!!!!!!!! Them using the clones as backups!!!! Me think how it was weird that the government would let a clone die so easily!!! They won’t!!!!! The government controlling them to be successful puppets!!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! The angst, and tension!!! The betrayal!!!!! Love it!!!!!

👀🥺 doc think of the clones as his children!!!!!!

They lost their memories!!! But Joan giving it back!! Her caring about her friends!!!!

Oh my god the stupid little hands gesture!!!!!! <3

….

That’s it??? THATS the ending? The mother showing everyone what Joan did during the death maze? And everyone being anger at her?

Ok, I feel like the twist to that, if there a season 3 is that her friends will forgive her.

Ok! Thought time!!!!

Ok, the fist half of this so is ROUGH! Like it has an idea (government wanting to groom the kids to be a successful leader) but the comedy and drama got a bit out of hand for the plot. I think want to say around 7-8 is when the show gets more, lore like? Or as close to plot as possible.

This season is VERY Joan centric. It gave her SO much character development. At first I thought it wouldn’t work, it made Joan feel like one of those not like other girls, and loser girl gets popular troupe. The whole love triangle with jfk and Abe was a bit rough. It was weird that Joan decided to be with jfk, after sleeping with him on prom night. But I guess since Abe was with Cleo and Abe only paying attention to Joan after she change herself, it make a TINY bit of scene.

The writing try to make it seems like Joan still loves Abe with that sexual dream she had, but I feel like after that episode, it wasn’t brought up again until episode 7. When Joan wanted jfk to be more emotionally invested in her. Also the whole Abe being in love with Joan? Also the random Abe getting mistreated it felt…..odd?

As for the other characters; out of the OG cast (Abe, ghandi, Joan, Cleo, jfk) only jfk had some character development. At first he was sexual with some emotional intelligence (when he comforts Joan at prom, him and Abe talking in the thinking dock, the whole ponce situation)….in season 2 he was more sexual with some minor emotional scene. I feel like episode 7-10 is were jfk is the most emotionally here.

Cleo….she basically only has 2 episodes for her character development. Episode 4, and Episode 7-8. In episode 4, she gets the crown and gets power hungry, after Joan apologizes to Cleo, she and Joan become friends-ish. In season 1 Cleo and Joan spend a lot of time together, because their parents were dating. They mostly argue but were friends-enemy? So Season 2 feel both a continuation of their season 1 relationship AND just a way to re-write Joan and Cleo relationship.

As for the other episodes? It basically her and Frida because friends to lovers. To be honest while the ship is cute, I wish it was more slow burn?

As for the new clones Harriet and Confusious. I’m mixed. Togher they make a cute couple. But separately I like them more as individuals. Harriet is the most developed out of the 3 new clones. She was awkward and a bit anxious (I think?) around episode 1, then as the show progressed she only hang around Frida, then she became closer friends with Joan. In episode 5 it’s really were Harriet feels the most….developing? She gets angry and worried over feeling Joan about how she feeling about the play! But she expresses herself and that cool!! She also has a weird little friendship with Frida, the 2 of them make a weird little group.

Confusions. At first I didn’t like, he was just a random guy who I hate his outfit. By episode 5, he gets some personal! He wants to have people pay attention to him! And by episode 6- 7, that when you know I bit more about him! He has a rich family who ignores him! His family likes his sister more and seem to emotionally neglect him. He’s a bit lazy and like to go with the flow and not have to work.But besides that…..I can’t think of anything else to say?

Frida. She’s…..there. She hangs out with Abe and Joan and Cleo sometimes. She paints, skateboards, and is the most popular girl in school. Besides that? There not a lot of info about her. It seems like this season had a few too many characters so they made Frida fade into the background…

At first I hate the new Joan new mom. (Candid? I can’t remember her name) I felt like she was a random character that didn’t need to be there. I felt like she was just there to replace the doc and just be annoying? But as the show progressed she was more of a background character that was silly. As for the final; I feel that were she shines the most!! Her wanting her foster daughter to rule the world, that idea is so cool!!!!! I love how she talk to Joan, how proud she was, and how she was going to use the clones as backup or to try to make them more perfect!!! She’s a character a feel like could work If she wasn’t stuck in a comedy.

My b my beloved <3

Topher is a dick. Hate how he blackmails Abe and try to push him and the gross teacher thing. Hate hate the show decided to do that. Like man!! If topper was really into Joan and wanted to blackmail Abe he could have done it a different way!!!!

The humor in this show….don’t feel there? I had like, a few chuckles but that was mostly because from the Doc. Or like from physical gags like the slow float or the couch catching on fire. The animation is fluid and I could see it like, a few times. The colors are a bit brights but I love the background!!! As for the voice acting….its a hit or miss.

5/10

Very Rough start but love the final 3 episodes.

[clarabowmp3]

3 famous people you'd like to have on a sleepover?

okay SO currently I would love love the main cast of lockwood and co but if I zoom out a little of the hyperfixation it would be:

Ali hadji-heshmati - this feels too personal LMAO but I have developed a very parasocial relationship with him through his (very limited!!) interviews and I just can’t get over how similar we are. We both studied science for our gcse’s, we both have an interest in lit (I would do a degree in it if I could, it was my contrasting subject for my sciences, and he IS doing a degree in it), we both applied to Oxbridge unis (only difference is he got accepted 🥲🥲) like AHHH and his personality just seems so??? I am very 😍😍 over this man and also very delusional but what else is new godddd I want to discuss so many literary texts w him esp cuz the ones I studied are by English authors and he’s British too so he likely knows them I sooo want to pick his brain. Also (this is besides the point but) his character in bad education is also very relatable (I need some kind of award for getting through my pe trauma and fighting for my life to get out of it) and it’s basically MEEE cuz both Warren and I were editors of our school newspapers, more academically inclined and deeply athletically stunted (which yea I know is basically any and every nerd BUT STILL) anyways im so normal about him 😀

olivia Rodrigo/sabrina carpenter - ideally it would be both if the drama/not-drama btw them didn’t exist cuz I love both of their music to bits!!!! Can’t blame a girl for trying was my first favourite album ten year old me was working HARD downloading it song by song on mp3 and having to figure out the titles myself (idk why I couldn’t see the titles for some reason but I would have to name the songs manually and for the longest time I thought white flag was called ‘I’ll go down’ or smth similar) and GUTS omg I was grindinggg for my prelims to that album I was listening to it 24/7 knocking practice papers out of the park it is so good alskxmdklslwhzjdjdbbs

Maisie peters - re: my the good witch post for the whole explanation like she just GETS it ofc i would love to have a sleepover with her AHHH