#cos i just do not have the energy. so im trying to do a hard reset

[paleiido]

Trying to learn new programs like they all want me to die personally

[coldflasher]

so annoying that i have like. 15 mins left of the next podcast ep to finish editing. it's been like 3 weeks and i just cannot bring myself to do those last 15 mins. BUT i do have the whole week off and if i finish editing it then i can record the rogue air ep... 👀

[akqrus]

Hahahahhahaha what if I gave up on the one thing I've been working for the past 4 years, Bc I might never be able to develop my art skills and become worthy of being called an "artist"?? Hahahahhahahahahahahhahahhaa

[beautifulfuckup99]

A Yoongi smut where he is very cold and rude but head over heels for her

Im getting addicted to your stories btw🥹

OMG, thank you so much! Love ya!

Title: Only for you

Warning(s): Classic "Black cat/Golden Retriever" Energy, Curs!ng, D!rty Talk, Bathroom S!x, Creamp!e, Oral, and Fluff

Author's Note: "Hates everyone but you" trope is my absolute FAV! Hope you enjoy, and also this is a "Non-Idol!AU"!

************************************

"No."

"Yoongi-"

"No. No!"

"Baby, please! It's just-"

"No, no, no! Nope! Nah! No!"

You sigh deeply and move to straddle your boyfriend's lap as he shakes his head continuously. "Y/N. Don't." He warns and you smirk at him, knowing you'd get your way eventually. It was cute how he always tried to 'put his foot down' though.

"Baby... Focus on the set." You say calmly as you place his hands on your new lingerie set you'd gone out to buy just today. You knew you'd need the big guns for tonight. Black silk barely covered your body that was freshly washed, shaved, and lathered in vanilla lotion.

"Y/N, that's not fair!" He argues as he grips the fabric of your boy shorts in his hands.

"It's a night out, to a nice lounge, to celebrate my co-worker's birthday." You justify. Yoongi had no real desire to always go out and party. If he was forced into it, he'd have to get drunk. That's how he became more sociable and friendly. But other than that, he didn't have the patience for a night out. Or a day out. Or... Well, if it involved other people, let's just say Yoongi wasn't interested.

You knew getting him out would be hard. Especially right now. He couldn't drink thanks to his pain medication the doctors just put him on due to the cold air hurting his prier shoulder injury. You knew tonight, he'd have no real vice to hold on to. Besides you, that is.

"Can't we just... Wish her happy birthday over the phone? I mean, YOU don't even like her!" Yoongi mutters and you snort, moving to kiss along your boyfriend's neck.

"Y/N... I'm serious..." He grumbles as you lay him back, smiling at him innocently. "Don't 'sex brain' me. I'm not going." He says flatly and you hum as you kiss down his body slowly.

"Sex brain?! I'd do..." *kiss* "No..." *kiss* "Such..." *kiss* "Thing..." You mutter between kisses as you get to the waistband of his sweats.

"It's all cold out there, and the snow is mushy, and the lounge is gonna be packed, and I don't even li... Like... Oh..." Yoongi breathes out as you start to softly kiss the outline of his dick through his sweatpants.

"Go ahead, baby. You can complain..." You whisper patiently before rubbing the slowly swelling outline.

"Fuck..." He breathes out and groans. "Y/N, that's not... Fair." He huffs as you slowly pull out his cock and kiss the tip sweetly, as if greeting the thick member. It was your best friend after all...

"We'll give it a few hours, and then we'll say our goodbyes and head out." You say gently as you stroke your hand slowly up and down his shaft.

"I hate your coworkers..." He groans and you smirk at that. Yoongi wasn't judgmental by any means. But your fellow coworkers... They really didn't like his style, or his job, or his opinions and viewpoints... Actually, they didn't like Yoongi in general. You two really were from different worlds and you knew the world you came from was full of stuck-up rich people who only ever saw Yoongi for where he came from.

"Just think about it like this..." You begin before softly licking up his cock, watching the tip twitch. "You get to see that new red dress on me tonight, if you just agree to come." You mumble before swirling your tongue along the tip as he moans.

"Fuck, Y/N..." He moans as his hips buck up slightly, trying to feel your mouth more. It makes you moan around his tip, which in turn, makes him gasp happily. "O-Ok, ok. Just... Suck my cock, baby..." He pants, needing this. You smile and move your hand upwards along his cock, doing a twisting motion.

"And you'll try and be nice...?" You taunt, watching in amusement as he nods fast.

"Ye... Yes!" He pants hotly, hand moving to grip your hair. You smirk and get right to work...

*****************************************

"You said you'd be nice." You hiss in Yoongi's ear. He grumbles a bit in response, and you snort at the sound. "I agreed to try." He corrects in your ear, and you snicker before going back to the conversation the table was having about this week and the bad weather.

"What are you two whispering about over there?" A male coworker jokingly asks.

"Oh, you know Y/N is Yoongi's little mouthpiece." Another jokes and Yoongi stares them down till they stop their laughing. You facepalm slightly. He always had this dark, icy glare. Like a shark...

"So, uh... Yoongi," Another coworker speaks up, eyeing his leather jacket with a fake smile on her face as if she wasn't judging his outfit right now. "How's your little... Business going?" She asks with a soft laugh. Yoongi scrunches his nose at the question, eyeing her in an annoyed fashion.

"Oh, things are going great! Just had a deal close the other day, he's doing great things." You say fast in order to clear up the tension before Yoongi really comes out of his mouth with an attitude. You were actually surprised he hasn't already.

"God, do you ever talk?" Another coworker tries joking and Yoongi finally speaks up.

"Do you ever shut up? You should try it sometime, maybe it'll help lessen my headache." He says bluntly and then fake laughs. You cover your mouth as to not laugh at the shocked look on your coworker's face.

"Please, excuse us!" You say fast and get up, grabbing Yoongi and dragging him off with you. You lead him towards the bathroom and playfully hit his arm.

"I said be nice!" You say and he hums as he eyes you.

"You said try." He defends and you rub your face tiredly before you feel your boyfriend pull you into his arms. You playfully grumble and let him kiss the side of your face and down your neck lightly.

"You're such a pain..." You mutter and pull back to eye your boyfriend. He looked absolutely delicious tonight. "How the hell can I get you to behave?" You whisper and he eyes you with a smirk playing on his lips.

"I can make a suggestion..." He says and you hum.

"Reading your mind as we speak..." You tease and pull at his arm, dragging him off to the ladies bathroom.

The second you realize the coast is clear, Yoongi's already grabbing you and pulling you to the sinks. You laugh at his eagerness. "No way you're still horny..." You mutter against his lips as he kisses you hungrily.

"Blame it on this fucking dress." He grumbles and you snicker proudly, wrapping your legs around his waist.

"We're gonna have to hurry. Can't keep 'em waiting forever." You whisper.

"Fuck them..." Yoongi mutters with a snort before focusing on your neck. You shut your eyes and hum in enjoyment till you feel him bite your neck.

"Yoongi! No hickeys!" You pant.

"What? Don't want them knowing what we snuck off to do? Hm? Too bad. I want all those stuck-up assholes to know their fancy titles and big watches mean shit. Because you'd still rather fuck me." He smirks and his proud smirk makes you laugh.

"Oh? Makes you feel like you won the big dick having contest?" You joke and he presses against you.

"I don't know. You tell me..." He whispers cockily and you playfully mush his face.

"Don't talk my ear off. Hurry up." You giggle and grab the back of his neck to pull his lips to yours, kissing him deeply and passionately. He kisses back with the same heat. His hands reach under your dress for your underwear, and you shiver at the coldness of his hands.

"Wanna warm them up?" He whispers against your lips before sliding his fingers along your inner thighs.

"Fuck..." You gasp softly and your head goes back against the mirror as he slides two fingers between your folds. "Mm... Yoongi..." You gasp and he bites your collarbone as he strokes your clit.

"Please. I need it..." You pant out as if suffocated by your own desire. He pulls his fingers away and sucks them clean, much to your bashful delight. You're quick to undo his belt and the second his cock is free; your legs are spreading.

"Ha. I've trained you well..." He jokes and kisses you deeply as your legs tug him by the hips so he can slide into you already. "Fucking eager..." He taunts and slides into you. "Fuck. You were made for me..." He groans happily and you lean back to look at him with soft eyes.

"How romantic..." You tease as he bottoms out inside of you. You moan as your head rolls back.

"So fucking pretty." He whispers as he watches you closely. You grab his face.

"You can be romantic with me after you finish fucking me." You pant as you grab him in need. You core felt on fire.

"Yes, ma'am..." He whispers and gives in to you. He fucks you a bit faster as you yank off his leather jacket to feel more of him. His hands grip your hips tight to hold you in place and your hands grip the sides of the sink so you can hold your legs open. His hands go to the back of your knees to hold your legs up and wide apart.

"Yes! Oh fuck!" You moan out as your head presses against the mirror more.

"Why so loud? Because no one can hear you." He taunts in your ear, and you shiver at the thought.

"Give me more. Please..." You pant. You never knew what you were begging for exactly, but Yoongi somehow gave you what you needed every time. He angels his hips to find your spot as his thumb goes to your clit. "Baby!" You cry out as you grip his arms, always careful of holding him and he was always grateful of that...

He kisses you sloppily and pumps in and out of you, enjoying your own private world for a moment until there's a knock on the bathroom door. You're quick to cover Yoongi's mouth.

"Y-Yes?" You call as calmly as you can.

"Y/N? That you?" One of your male co-workers, Timothy, asks, and Yoongi laughs from behind your hand. You give him a look to stay quiet.

"Y-Yup. Yeah, it's me." You shakily call out cause Yoongi has decided now is a great time to slowly bottom out inside of you, so you feel every inch of him...

Your eyes roll back slightly at the pressure and the feel of his tip pressed firmly against your sweet spot.

"Are you okay in there? Did your little boy toy leave? We're sorry if we made you two fight." Tim says in an innocent tone that you and Yoongi knew wasn't so innocent. You knew Tim had a little workplace crush on you, but you were sure that always talking and showing off Yoongi would one day snap him out of whatever he thought was gonna happen between you two. But there was no realization coming from him anytime soon.

"Oh, no, we're-" You're stopped from your sentence by Yoongi sliding out and the hitting your sweet spot with the right amount of force.

"Perfect!" You call out in pure pleasure before swatting at his arm.

"Are you sure you're okay in there, Y/N?" Tim asks as Yoongi moves to your ear while fucking you hard and fast.

"Yeah, are you okay in here, Y/N?" He whispers in your ear, and you can barely focus on anything other than the bundle of heat in your stomach about to burst.

"Y-Ye... Yes..." You hiss out as you look Yoongi in the eyes with a 'I'm gonna kill you after this' look. It makes him smirk happily.

"Y/N?" Tim asks from the locked bathroom door as Yoongi kisses you hotly.

"Don't stop..." You whine quietly against his lips as he starts rubbing your clit.

"Cum, baby. Cum on my cock..." He nods fast and you tune out Tim effortlessly as you feel it coming.

"Yes!" You gasp and move closer to Yoongi, biting down on the cork of his neck as you cum.

"Fuck..." Yoongi moans quietly and holds you down on your cock so you're milking him. "That's a good girl..." He praises as you moan happily when you feel him fill you up. You grab him and kiss you as Tim starts knocking on the bathroom door relentlessly.

"Ugh. Stay here. I'll get rid of him and then you walk out." You whisper and Yoongi nods, pulling out of you. You wait for the shakiness to pass and, when you can feel your legs again, you get up and fix yourself before walking over to the door. You open it and poke your head out.

"Oh! You're okay. Thank god, cause I was so worried-" Tim is cut off by Yoongi walking over behind you, which makes you facepalm.

"Tim?" Yoongi asks as he makes it obvious that he's now fixing his belt on his pants.

"Uh... Yeah, man?" Tim asks, eyeing you both now wirily.

"You wanna fuck off?" Yoongi asks bluntly with the same casual expression on his face. You keep your face covered, not even wanting to look up at Tim.

"Uh... Yeah, yup, let me... Go back to the table." Tim mutters, a bitter look on his face before he storms off. You snort and turn to Yoongi, swatting at his chest.

"Would it kill you to be nice?" You ask and he pauses as if thinking.

"Mm... It just might. And then what would you do without me?" He plays along with the same smile that's only meant for you. You blush and nudge him lightly.

"Let's go. Before you fight someone else." You chuckle and grab his hand, pulling him off towards the table to get your stuff and run off back home.

[venuscnjunctpluto]

Megan thee stallion and astrology ⭐️

Credit: @insertlanasong

(Im in no way blaming dv on where the stars were in the sky. the gremlin and all these other male bullies are accountable for their OWN actions)

*Lilith in 1st: I’m not gonna stfu about this placement. When I say men are intimidated by us and we don’t even have to speak. Megan constantly gets told she’s acting like a man and trying to play a man’s game for being openly sexual. These same people lust after her all day long. It should be noted how many men online and in the industry seemed to gang up on her for someone nobody gaf about all like that and who had a history of violence. With Lilith in 1st people are waiting for your downfall and you have to be mindful of who is around and why they’re there. 

*her aqua sun she’s definitely been very giving and she’s been promoting charities for cancer, I think she’s trying to open some hospitals, organized a clean the beach event, and advocated for victims of abuse esp black women.

* Megan has a Leo mars and people have compared her performance energy to Beyoncé who also has a Leo mars. I do enjoy this placements ability to put on a show

*Shes a good representative of Taurus rising women as she can go into multiple spaces. She’s recently visiting the White House and her classy Venusian energy fit in well.

* megan stated in a live that she can’t stay away from Virgos and her ex friend Kelsey was one also Moneybaggyo. She has Virgo in her 5th which could explain her gravitating towards them because of the fun and excitement that house brings.

*Megans bf Pardison has Venus square Lilith (which represents his relationships w women and she’s Lilith prominent) his mars in her 7th/8th house cusp and hella 10th house synastry. She’s known as the hot girl coach and was introduced to the public as looking for a fun time and not taking men seriously. But of course 10th house synastry makes you wanna go to show that person off esp Venus.

*I love Nickis music so barbs pls don’t come for me (idgaf) but nicki has been arguing w herself. She’s a sag sun and Venus so these placements are likely In Megan’s 8th house. People like to debate what the planet person feels but it’s alot of mutual energy. Megan seemed to be a fan of nicki and they seemed to get along. Then something clearly happened and nicki started throwing shot after shot at Megan since 2021. And to this day *in my tiktok voice* nicki is arguing w herself in the public eye coming after Megan HARD. I’ve had an 8th house stellium with this guy and it’s gone very similar it’s a love-hate until it’s straight up hate after a certain point. It’s been weird to see this considering nicki has never so overtly came after somebody this much esp somebody she co-signed and collabed w. And nicki is a sag Venus (aka a bisexual which Megan is as well) so I wouldnt be suprised if this could be a scorned lover situation.

Torey Lanez’s pluto squared Megan’s sun, moon, and mars. His Lilith conjuncts her sun plus his mars in her 1st house. That man was obsessed w her and he already had a clear anger problem that he admitted to during an interview. My cousin has sun square pluto w her bf and he’s very controlling and insecure when it comes to her.

7th house synastry though very comfortable Can also be be open enemies. For ex: Megan thee stallion after that gremlin shot her you had numerous MEN coming to attack her (Of course with Lilith in 1st) . I would like to name three of them. Drake, Joe Budden, and Dababy all Scorpio placements. Megan is a Taurus rising w unconfirmed degrees but I bet she has 7th house synastry w all of them. Drake has Venus, sun, and mercury in Scorpio. Joe Budden has a Scorpio mars and Dababy has a Scorpio Venus. They all came for her at one the most difficult times of her career just to drag her down even more. Drake and Dababy publically lusted after her and Joe budden was drooling in his seat interviewing her prior to his comments about her. Im a late Aries rising and I’ve had issues w many Scorpio placements because they had some underlying issue w me for no reason. Scorpio In the 7th is very difficult because if our enemies don’t know if they wanna harm us or literally f*ck us it’s insane. She even said something similar in a freestyle.

I hope she keeps glowing cause her vulnerability and strength is inspiring🫶🏾🫶🏾

[goddessxdivine]

SYDCARMY RANTING (this is ridiculously long, im sorry, and you’ve been warned)

so this started out with thinking about a SydCarmy scene in S3Ep9 that went something along the lines of:

S: “it’s hard to keep up with you sometimes”

C: “yeah well I’ve been this a lot longer so…”

S: “…I didn’t mean on a skill level”

[some in between conversation]

C: “i don’t want it to be hard to keep up with me”

S: “… okay …. then goodnight”

i always go into some kind of spiral with them because they give so much but so little lol when I first watched that scene I always interpreted it as Carmy telling Syd that he wants to be better about his behavior so he’s not hard to keep up with & Syd not thinking that was “enough” (as in “what are you gonna do so i can see those changes”) which led to their awkward goodbye/goodnight. but, and forgive if im super late to this realization, now im seeing how maybe Syd interpreted Carmy’s words to mean that she needs to change how she executes her duties so that she can keep up with him, essentially telling her to step her game up.

either way im sure there are many interpretations of that scene and what they each meant with their words/looks. because one thing about Sydney and Carmen, is they will have full conversations with just their eyes. however, their communication is off. when it comes to really fleshing out those deep conversations that help people become closer, they often shy away from it. this is not to say that they don’t get deep with each other. but to me, there are many opportunities where they could deepen their relationship as friends and co-owners but then they stop before it can get too heavy. i think this is both a character trait for Syd & Carmy but also a choice of the creators to not include those scenes. if you’ve experienced anything similar to what happened to westallen then you may be familiar with a creator/showrunner excluding necessary conversations that provide context to a character’s decision. or tptb just straight up deleting scenes vital to the characters. so i think Syd and Carmy keep misunderstanding each other for many reasons.

back to the S3Ep9 scene. i went from thinking about it to realizing i needed to rewatch the entire scene. and in doing so i feel like im able to see certain things in a different light. so the conversation goes

C: “tonight was off”

S: “been off”

C: “im sorry”

then Syd brings up it being hard to keep up him as i mentioned about before. i think, in that moment of Carmy apologizing for his energy that contributes to “been off”, Syd starts to approach mentioning how his behavior has affected her and their work environment (by telling him “it’s hard to keep up with you”). but Carmy, who is much too focused on perfecting this dish, isn’t really paying attention to what Syd is trying to softly communicate causing him to respond badly. which then annoys Syd, making her feel like maybe it’s time to broach the much dreaded Shapiro offer. however, she stops herself. i think in classic Syd-form, she took a step back to look at the bigger picture. she and Carmy know each other well; she knows he’s stressed out causing him to obsess and he knows when she has something that’s bothering her to say.

even when he annoys her, they’ve built something greater than her just wanting to further her career and flippantly tell him that she’s considering another job offer. there are many relationships in that kitchen that they formed together. if im not mistaken, Carmy had been working at The Beef for about 2 months when Syd came in to stage. when she started Richie and Tina were still very anti. Carmy and Syd wrangled everyone to be a real restaurant with close friendships together. dare i say, Syd coming into the beef gave Carmy hope that he could actually prove what he’d always wanted to Mikey.

there are times where Syd and Carmy give those two people (romantic or platonic) who become so close so quickly and when they’re at odds with one another, mending that is difficult for them. at some point they realize that they have yet to figure out how best to communicate with each other. they’ve created a space where things that could be discussed, met with compromise, and quickly put to bed, ends up with both parties feeling unheard. which goes back to what im saying about them needing to know each other more deeply because they already know each other well. for example, Carmy’s “im right here” when Syd says “[the Shapiro thing] can wait.” they know each other well enough for her to know (outside of personal avoidance) maybe he doesn’t need to hear this right now and he knows her well enough to know that she probably really needs to talk about something.

after this, Carmy invites Syd to the Ever funeral. while i do think that he invited her because, as he said, it’d be her “last chance to eat there” and “it’s Ever”, it might have also been personal for him. i think that he knew there was a chance of angry-mean-NY chef being there and other people/situations that may make him anxious. and as we know, a fancam of Syd helps him calm down. but that wouldn’t have been enough, he needed Syd there in real time. idk I’ve just always felt like Syd empowered (for lack of a better term) Carmy.

then finally we’re back to Carmy saying “I don’t want it to be so hard to keep up with me” and Syd leaves seemingly upset which further exemplifies their miscommunication

okay done now :))

[crazylittlejester]

I just realized after going through your Fics on A03 that I've read nearly all of your zelda stuff several times over and read at least 10 of them brand new just today! (I think I'm missing like...12 of them? I'll fix that soon!) just wondering though because most people seem to take a long time to read things before posting yet you post impressively fast! (especially for the scarf lad Wars!) do you also read at slightly over 340wpm? I read that fast and actually recently cleared a 107,250word fic in 2.5 hours!

i actually read slow as fuck when I’m genuinely trying to read and comprehend something, it takes me a long while to read cos i’m dyslexic alskdkdk. Like if I actually wanna understand the sentence and read every individual word in it and not just skim through and call it a day? i ain’t fast and it takes a LOT of effort, which is evil and cruel because i love reading so much, like i love the absorbing knowledge part and i love the stories, but the actual looking at the words part is so hard for me and sometimes i just don’t have the energy to really focus on it alkdkddk

and then my impatience doesn’t help AT ALL, so I end up like, skipping through sentences and reading the words out of order because my brain is like “nope, can’t read that word, not gonna bother trying, SKIP” I’ll get four or six words down the line and my brain will be like “OH FUCK THAT WAS IMPORTANT ACTUALLY- GO BACK.” and then ill end up having to force myself to reread the whole sentence tracking each word with my damn finger like im teaching a 5 yo to read but the 5 yo is me 😭

its a damn miracle my writing comes out coherent because with the exception of like, 2-3 fics, my beta reader is me, and I can’t read easily haha

[shutupheathersorryheatherr]

“What hair product I think each svt member is”

Summery: a holiday fic that has absolutely nothing to do with the holidays! Wanted to try my hand at writing something a bit different and thought this was a good idea to start. Not really comedy but amusing none the less! (idk if what I wrote makes sense hopefully yall are picking up what I’m putting down) approximately: ten minute read

A/n: THIS IS NOT MY ORIGINAL IDEA! (In a way it is buuuutttt still) I can’t find the author who wrote the “what piece of furniture svt are” or something to that effect so they’re the ones who gave me the idea so if yall find them please tag them unless I do first!

warningz/info: mentions of pain, mentions of chocolate, I think what, three curse words? y'all let me know if I should start keeping them to a minimum or remove them entirely because I know some people are uncomfortable with them! I feel like the spacing between paragraphs is weird in this fic but oh well. no idea how this is gonna go over and im scared that I tagged it with "x reader". plus I dont know if anyone would read/enjoy it but I had loads of fun writing it! as always, if you did like it, please leave some love like comments and or reblogs!

~this is simply a piece of fiction. My imagination onto “paper. This is in no way is mean to be taken as an actual and real representation of anyone.~

•••••••••••••••••••

>Seungcheol<

gel. Sticks to you like glue once you find each other (romantic music starts playing in the hair care isle when you pick up your favorite gel) everyone has their preferred brand/ look they worship. Thicc. Either smells putrid and chemical like or good enough to transport you to a magical land of chocolate, pink grass and purple clouds

>Jeonghan<

he is a Bobby pin. And I will provide no further explanation on this except that he holds you together but will stab you lmao

>Shua<

an Afro pick/ hair pick. Its what everyone’s looking for: that little somen’ somen’. That little poof we all desire. Also scalp massages :)

>Jun<

wide tooth comb. My fellow thick haired/ curly haired people will know about this one 😭 this shit can be mean to your scalp tugging on your hair and UGH helps you greatly and is a necessity but damn… that’s all I gotta say

>Hoshi<

Refresher product/ moisture product. wakes you up in the morning. Gives you a reason to NOT look like you just rolled outta bed even though you did. For most this is one ofthe holy grails in life. What would I do without it? Makes us all smile even at 4:00 am because oh my god I look better after I slapped this in. Just all around a day-brightener

>Wonwoo<

curl cream. Grounding. Has many different looks n stuff

>Woozi<

a rat tail comb. Everyone should have one. Versatile, used for many different things. Good for every sort of job and is a natural to be honest and is small but mighty lol

>DK<

a satin/ silk bonnet. And no, not one of those that most  moms wear with the lace trim. Those end up at the foot of your bed by the morning. The ones with the thick elastic. I choose this cause it goes by many different names, just like him lol just has that comfy homey feel to it

>Mingyu<

hair mask. Made at home with some questionable ingredients. Seriously sometimes I don’t think he’s real lol 

>Hao<

a denman brush. It sounds to helpful and great. And it is great!…. When you figure out how to use it. Hard to figure out but once you get the hang of it you’ll never go back (another thing my fellow curly haired babes will understand)

>Seungkwan<

co wash. A little something extra, a boost of energy, if you will. a well kept secret but also a well known fact 

>Vernon<

hair tie. Easy to loose but also easy to find. especially in places where youd think: “why the fuck would it end up here?” Like idk man, but you should definitely check the dark corner collecting lint— that’s where they always are

>Dino<

leave in conditioner because with use over time it makes your hair (you) healthier

~End~

a/n: annnnnnnnddddd thats it! hope y'all enjoyed this disaster of a fic lmao if you liked it, please leave some love like comments or reblogging!

stay safe, y'all!

2023 ©️copyright for shutupheathersorryheatherr do NOT repost, steal, or translate my work even if you give me credit

taglist: @itz-yerin

[vacantgodling]

holds microphone up to u

may i hear about tmc

gimme your thoughts

WELL <3 since you asked so nicely <3 (jkjk but thank you eeeee)

so-- surprisingly atm i'm trying to figure out The Plot. i wasn't sure if i was ever going to make ?? a proper plot for tmc just because like. i love tmc and the kiddos so much but bc i know i want it to be a webcomic style thing that's just scared me off from working on it. basically bc art hard. But i should do it because i want to have fun and i had a few like. lingering dream-thoughts about some things so i thought i'd try and push it more.

rn i'm toying with the idea of expanding what's going on with society. because right now basically, there's the "city thing" that chidori and co live in which is dominated by trains. but i don't think anyone knows the kinda Back Drop for tmc?? cuz i never talk about it?? but basically this is a futuristic wip where humanity had to adapt to earth's sea levels rising WAAAAY up (in a way that is totally improbable but like i'm not hard worldbuilding this world at all bc this is supposed to feel shonen anime like PFFFF. basically anything goes cuz i said so energy). so they use train rails and special train types to get around. tm.

this is old art from an old ask but this is the gist basically LMAO im sorry its so shit PFF

i was originally thinking of making wholly different societies that have something different instead of train masters BUT TBH, i think everywhere has train masters like its a global thing but chidori's city is just a big ass city and governments are still different like how bangkok, nyc, and paris all have different currency pff. basically my scope of the world is just expanding.

anyway tho, chidori's city has the largest population and by virtue of that its the one most prone to diseases, struggling, and economic stagnation. rich people gotta rich so they hate this.

my thought for the plot is actually around the strength of the sturgeon dollar. tl;dr the money in chidori's city is called "sturgeons" like the fish (and is colored similarly) but its actually got a poor exchange rate with the other cities. this is something that is concerning to the herme family who bellamy is the youngest child of. (bellamy below--the diamond prince and one of the s-rank train masters tm)

bellamy is technically the "odd one out" of the herme family and is treated very poorly behind closed doorsaside from his illustrious and beloved image by the public. his family is full of law makers and politicians, but they also have heavy ties with crime (which is what i'm kinda developing now) and they have links to crime various other syndicates across the flooded world. the problem is, because the sturgeon dollar is so weak it puts them at a disadvantage when it comes to negotiations with other politicians and syndicates. so with the under-the-table go ahead from the government, they have begun operations to start working towards destabilizing pretty much every city society (at the expense of civilians obvs) to try and either make the sturgeon dollar stronger, or to introduce an entirely new method of currency only for the elites.

me playing with the idea of yagmur being a double agent has to do with the fact that yagmur is a secret train master branch basically akin to the fbi or z-rank. they're covert ops. he's technically been assigned to work for the government of chidori's city to help with whatever tf this plan is but at the same time, he and bellamy are in a not-so-secret secret relationship and despite coming from money, bellamy hates his family. so yagmur is loyal to bellamy before anything else. but at the same time, bellamy isn't necessarily concerned with citizens--he's concerned with revenge and tearing down his family. so if i were to classify things as they currently are:

chidori and his main friend group (amehana, solange, bev, folami, and markis) are on the side of their city and protecting it from like everything.

bellamy and yagmur on their own side trying to take down the herme family.

the herme family and government (and some other entities) are on their own side trying to sabotage other cities to strengthen thier own dollar and since yagmur works for the government he's also kind of involved in this too.

so that'sssss currently where i'm at. i still need to figure out how the train academy works, what's up with these semi-magical weapons, redesigning folami (AGAIN but thankfully i think i have a good idea this time) and just other stuff to uhhhh make this make sense. maybe figure out the city situations as well?? just a lot tbh LOL

[stardustkrishnaverse]

HEY GUYS

STORY TIME

so I wanna like talk about one of Shri Keshav's miracles today where I really felt his work 😭

so like honestly my whole life I've been struggling with a sense of routine, idk why it's so hard for me but I just have a mental block that prevents my brain from stringing the logic together to create one consciously???

(but I also medically have adhd symptoms so yeah probs why)

and it's literally a daily frustration that's put such a hindrance on my life since I joined uni, so 3 years ago. like, I literally struggle with this so much its impacted my uni studies entirely.

so yeah usually I don't ask Keshav for anything except like "be with me" and all... I usually just try to bring about the changes within MYSELF, WITH His presence in my life. cos I felt like I needed to do it all myself and 'prove myself'.

but I read this story yesterday about how in the Mahabharata, Dharmaraj felt ashamed about the situation with the gambling game, hence he didn't surrender or even ask Shri Krishna to do anything during it - he didn't ask for His advice or input at all, none of them did until Draupadiji did during you-know-what, when he finally was able to step in. so I took away from that that it's okay to ask for guidance and help from Shri Krishna so you can be saved from unnecessary things. that's a cosmic law of free will - until you ask Shri Krishna to step in, he won't be able to.

so yeah then I got the inspo, and I was annoyed with myself today (not even the most annoyed ive been, like 4/10 annoyed) and was just like, "okay im so done with how much I waste time, Shri Krishna please help me with my productivity and routine!!!"

after that, I was meeting a couple friends today, both who were not very spiritual to my knowledge. one left early (very unexpectedly and last min may i add) and the other stayed.

we were just talking about bollywood, and i completely forgot about my work. with this friend we usually don't talk about self-help, super personal life stuff, etc. that much.

BUT. it turned out that my friend has been more spiritual recently, and been trying to be more productive. and i told him about how chaotic my routine was, and was comfortable enough to talk about my daily spirituality.

and so he literally sat down and helped me make a routine.

we wrote it out in the local Korean restaurant on a few receipts, and he made it so easy and simple, literally just starting with "what would YOU like to do in the day". he listened to all my one-braincell fusses about needing stimulation and my erratic adhd routine etc. etc. and patiently helped me plan a structure for my day. he gave me his advice from when he was struggling with the same things. and now I have a physical timetable, and i literally feel so much more grounded and my energy feels more contained and I'm not as restless.

so like, WHAT. ???!!!!!

so all I had to do all these years was just ASK SHRI KRISHNA TO HELP??!!!!

and as soon as I said bye to my friend I was like. THIS IS KRISHNA. IT IS LITERALLY ALL KRISHNA. WHAT THE HELL.

so um. guys, learn this lesson!!! ask shri krishna for help if you're struggling with something!!! and open your heart to what he says!!! :3

radhey radhey~ 🦚💙🙏✨️

[happy-tori-friends]

TWITTER MUSINGS - AGAIN

trying to cut back on twt and maybe move musings to here and to bsky... this features one stupid post from bsky too

i need to start posting notices when i update like ppl wanted kjfdjkdfjkf this happened with bw too, i did it and then i started to forget.

some of these may have been confessed to treetownconfessions at the same time. hi i'm nemmy.

Winter

lifty and shifty push their beds together and huddle for warmth during the nights when the heat in their apartment doesnt work. it doesnt help much. when they move in with splendont, they learn that he has a lot of body heat and with the house being heated and them sleeping with one of them on each side of him, their heads on his chest and cuddled close, they have their first comfortable winter night in years. warm. safe. secure. happy.

Sanguine Thoughts

thinking about vampire oneshot 4 halloween and how lifty and shifty eat a lot of meat and makes their blood rich in iron... waht if that makes it extra yummy for splendont + blood drinking seen as an act of intimacy...

i really like vampires.

+ woozy lifty and/or shifty leaning up against splendont after being drinken from, him making them eat afterwards... i have a lot of thoughts...

:)

i wanna write lifty getting comforted and loved by splendont despite all his insecurities and issues.

i would also like to write all that but [REDACTED]

Warrior Cats

my version of lifty and shifty shouldnt have been forced to steal to survive at 11 years old they should have been reading warrior cats like the rest of us autistic kids

lifty and shifty arguing over who gets to be firestar in their warrior cats larping session. shady, watching them, thinks 'who tf is firestar'

they make him read warrior cats to them before bed and one day he says 'yknow boys *i* should be firestar. i'm your dad' and shifty says 'no way, youre too old you can be purdy!' shady, at most 31 (he and jewel had them between 18-20, pretty young): THE OLD GUY?!

in bed that night 'jewel... i'm not as young as i used to be... i'm an elder now...' jewel pats him and says 'its olay honey theyre kids. their perception of being old is different bc theyre young' 'MY BONES ARE ACHING JEWEL... I NEED THE YOUNGINS TO TAKE CARE OF ME AND BRING FOOD AND GET RID OF THE TICKS'

jewel laughs. 'shady, you're taking this larping business to seriously. go to bed.'

they would assign jewel ferncloud btw

Game

had an idea in my head for the htf chatfic involving a video game but then i pivoted to a different video game (cuphead) but i think the original video game was also hard but IDR WHAT IT WAS AND IM ANGRY ABOUT IT unless it was always cuphead and there was no first game

(i still dont remember)

Donut Earirngs

nutty would go wild for those donut earrings in the new moogle event. notoyo matoyo the 27 year old lalafell will be wearing them whether he likes it or not

i have no idea what notoyo looks like but he probably looks silly. nutty created him with love.

Disorganized

shifty has the energy of that kid taht just shoved all their school shit into their backpack. no folders. so naturally he did the same with his very important tranaformation trinket and has to spend forever digging the watch and crystal out while a monster causes mayhem.

Lifty :D

i love you lifty! yay! your my favorite :D *projects onto him and hos brother and gives him A Lot of Issues.*

Animal Crossing

splendont buys the twins animal crissing new horizons alongsuse switches. he asks them about it. lifty has played the game normally. shifty has not paid the first nook miles debt and has focused entirely on making money.

"you know theres more game if you pay the debt, right?" asks splendont

"there's what" shifty replies, astonished

"you didnt notice me doing more with my game?" lifty asks.

shifty did not for he was too focused on making bells

they co op and splendont and lifty try to give each other tours of their islands but shifty keeps hitting them and the villagers with nets or axes.

Back At The BBQ Musings

lifty who hopes to make a good impression at the very first group gathering he's ever really been into vs food gremlin shifty who eats so much meat he passes the fuck out

YouTuber Shifty

*unregistered hypercam 2, the most laggy and low quality footage ever. the Worst mic quality.*

shifty: hey guys welcome back to my channel today i will be playing minecraft.

*five seconds of footage*

shifty: thanks for watching, part 2 if we get 10 ppl in the $500,000 tier on my patreon

when this doesnt work he starts a content farm or a malicious prank channel

Mother 3

i had this thought when i first concepted their backstory bc i had a very brief earthbound + mother 3 phase but splendont and the twins finish earthbound and he tells them that he hasn't played mother 3 but hes heard good things about and they play the fan translation.

'oh huh they're twins. haha lets name the characters after our family!" says lifty, naming lucas after himself, klaus after shifty, hinawa after their dead mom, and flint after their father who was very much impacted by the death of their mother

35 or so hours of gameplay later, the emotional damage levels are out of this fucking world.

The Worst Sims 4 Save (cq for. vague nsfw mentions)

the other day i made splendont and the twins (and splendid) in the sims 4 with wicked whims installed and also plopped down an old shizaya household i made and had shifty go visit them. he stole 3 things, did not not hit it off great with izaya (but found them both attractive) and then proceeded to mess around on their tablet while they got freaky. shizuo THEN proceeded to start a fire on the grill only for shifty to put it out. then he went home.

shifty also liked to kick the trash can when he got angry (i gave him the hot headed trait) and bc lifty and splendont kept getting playful (listen i ran out of ideas - i gave lifty a custom traits that gave him a constant sad moodlet and another negative one so i replaced that with playful and i gave splendont one that made him playful around his loved ones) so they kept fucking playing in the trash. they were also insatiable (to be fair i had it turned on high a while for the hell of it and was constantly running romantic actions to try and fix relationship satisfaction) but god damn. it was basically either flirty, playful (for lifty and splendont), angry (for shifty), or sad (for lifty, though he sometimes got a fine or tense moodlet). i ended up stopping playing the save file bc it was too hard trying to balance two romantic satisfaction bars and making them stop getting freaky to go to work (shifty was unemployed but dont and lifty had jobs) even tho i was using cheats

getting freaky doesnt really help the satisfaction btw and it just interrupted a lot of my flirting actions so having it on high didnt really work the way i was hoping

Shifty's Hobby

splendont: yknow your brother likes to bowl and do mechanical stuff, or just... make things. like cooking or using his hands or being creative. he plays video games too but do you have hobbies? dont say stealing things. shifty: of course i have fucking hobbies! i... play games +

too sometimes! splendont, snorting: anything else? shifty: of course! what do you take me for? i... i... *cut to shifty with his head in his hands and splendont patting his back* splendont: we'll find you something you like doing, i'm sure.

his hobbies are hating splendid, being annoying (especially towards lifty bc. siblings), and causing problems /j

Surgery (from BSKY!!!)

stupid idea that makes like no sense but popped into my head: fliqpy holding a knife with the text caption of 'giving my boyfriend the surgery he needs! (i dont have a medical license ^_^)' in the background, splendid is laying in a bed with a terrified expression

the ^_^ is super necessary bc it makes it feel so much funnier

FFXIV AU Starting Guilds

whats arguably funny about the twins quitting their starting guilds is that

1. the lvl 15 archer quest is when silvaire stops trying to get the wol expelled from the guild and just doesnt want to really show he accepts their skill. shifty still throws a tantrum n breaks the bow and quits.

2. the level 15 pugilist quest is when hamom reveals he isnt as good as he used to be bc hes old and chuchuto asks the wol to help him regain his passion. and then lifty has to awkwardly tell her that this is Not for him.

FFXIV AU: The Office

splendont looking off to the side like theres a camera and he's on the office after having his first echo vision: i miss my boyfriends chat. i miss them a lot.

y'shtola: *thinking* who the hell is he talking to?

*A FEW EXPANSIONS LATER*

splendont, doing the same thing while also dying of light poisoning: i miss my boyfriends chat

(said boyfriends are mad at him for getting light poisoning and off trying to find a cure)

ardbert: ...do you perhaps mean... me?

FFXIV AU: Gravity

ffxiv au lifty tries to calm down his nerves after getting to mare lamentorum by doing a little jump and then spends a good 5 minutes having a crisis bc it does not have low gravity.

FFXIV AU: Balmung

prequel tweet: i have a really stupid ffxiv au joke to make but it hinges specifically on knowledge that balmung is the sex rp world/server and also me making a random excuse for game mechanics via the aetheryte to be plausible in the isekai setting

*ul'dah aetheryte plaza*

lifty: huh... i think you can travel to different worlds with this thing. ...balmung? i'm gonna go there.

*five minutes later, he teleports back in*

lifty, horrified: Do Not Go To Balmung

shifty: lmao loser it can't be that bad.

*another 5 minutes later*

shifty: Do Not Go To Balmung

splendont: i'm sure it's fine. *another five minutes later*

splendont: ah. nope. Do Not Go To Balmung.

bright volcano: ...huh?

shifty: wait. wait hear me out lets go to balmung... Together.

*an hour passes before they return, disheveled*

splendont: balmung's pretty neat actually

lifty: agreed shifty: fr

bright lava: What The Hell Happened In Balmung

splendont: for us to know and you to not.

im from balmung btw im allowed to make this joke.

Bad HTF x FFXIV Tweets Based On Focus Expansions

got accused of assassinating the sultana bc i picked up a cool bottle and then got dragged into fighting dragons and defeating some old ruler guy! hashtag just lifty things!!!

decided to help free this nation from the empire's rule but we fucked up and now we went to free another country from the same empire and somehow a failef assassination attempt on the empire's prince turned into him being obsessed with fighting me! hashtag just shifty things!!!

got called to another dimension in the world im isekai'd into to stop eternal day by killing light monsters and absorbing the light but it was too much for my body and i almost became a giant world destroying light monster and terrified my bfs! hashtag just splendont things!!!

(the realest thing was after it i just tweeted'this is stupid as a reply. bc it is')

FFXIV AU: WORQOR ZORMOR - The Healer Conundrum

OG THREAD + A BONUS: bad ffxiv au: shifty says something snarky and then gets tankbusted (he is Not a tank)

badder idea: shifty says hell no to healer alisae and instead gives lifty a book and a soul crystal and says 'here you heal'

'how tf did you get this' asks everyone. 'stole it how else,' he responds.

cut to lifty panicking bc he doesn't know how to do SHIT.

lifty staring at the fairy 'please help me we are dying'. the fairy is also confused.

pov: your name is shifty. you, your twin brother, and your shared boyfriend have all been isekai'd into the critically acclaimed mmorpg final fantasy xiv. youve been through a lot of shit and now youre on a journey to help someone claim the throne. you need to climb a mountain which is a dungeon. but the only healer in your group is staying behind. his sister, a red mage, offers to heal for you. she has a healing spell and a revival spell in her kit. you get along well, you even consider her a friend, but she always takes the limit break when it's available and you dont really trust her as a healer. you also stole a soul crystal and weapon for a healing class at some point just because, but you think being healer would be lame and your boyfriend is way too cool to be a healer. all things considered your group technically isnt playing by the games rules considering you have two tanks and normally 4 dps and one healer, but youre down a healer. krile is happy as a pictomancer, and you think having two tanks is really funny so wuk lamat is off the hook. that leaves alisae, aka the red mage who offered to heal, and your brother lifty, a machinist. he has never been a healer, let alone a disciple of magic. do you trust alisae or do you force your brother who has really never casted a spell in his life and has no idea how to be a scholar?

FFXIV AU: Bee My Honey

honey b lovely: what? why isn't your heart pounding! why aren't you charmed by me?

lifty, a homosexual: Men

FFXIV AU: G'raha Tia

bad ffxiv au idea. g'raha thinks he has a chance w one of the twins bc he knows splendont is dating one of them but he doesn't know which. what he doesn't know is that its both. its a v poly. hes dating them both. what he ALSO doesnt know is that he has a cute lizard gf in an alternative universe. and in many other universes, other partners. he is beloved.

krile: what's wrong raha?

g'raha: i thought one of the warriors of light was single bc two of them are twins but it turns out theyre both dating the other warrior of light and he's a hinge apparently.

krile: ...you didnt know?

g'raha: .

(THIS IS TOTALLY PROBABLY OOC BY THE WAY DONT TAKE THIS SERIOISLY)

FFXIV AU: Shaaloni

5 seconds after entering shaaloani

shifty: alright pinhead, your time is up!

lifty: im not fucking doing the bit.

erenville: ???

splendont, with all the love and adoration he feels for the two in his eyes: dont question it man, he's just screwing around.

[brucespringsteen]

Hi, do you have any beginner tips for lifting/getting into the gym? I no longer want to be a scrawny waifish butch and instead wanna be able to pick up my gf and look like mid 80s Bruce… If you’re comfortable talking about it I’d love to hear if you have any tips… I’ve been researching and have learned that diet is a huge part in building muscle but as far as the gym goes I’m lost… I’m honestly mostly just nervous because I have no clue where to start and don’t want some dude to help me (nothing wrong honest help I’m just shy and get embarrassed)… Thank you!!!

hi king 🤝🏻

im so happy 2 talk about this cos im in my musclebound era again

disclaimer what i know is a mix of what i learned from my dad and reddit threads LOL and my own trial and error. weightlifting really is the gayass journey of all time 💪🏼😋

first gonna keep it real with u ive lost a lot of muscle mass from stupid life events n being sad lol but im actually getting back into a routine for the first time in over a year. so i haven't properly lifted anything heavier than the 15lbs dumbells i got at home 😂 when i was once able to press more than my weight ✊🏼😔 BUT form is so much more important than lifting heavy. u will get better results lifting at a weight that you can control and build up lifting heavier over time 👍🏼 which i can go more in depth about how to do that. good form is so sexy and makes u feel and look so badass

u might find more eloquent lifters out there who talk about the mind and muscle connection and visualization. it's really cool stuff that connects practicing mindfulness as u workout which is what makes weightlifting so meditative to me. this will also help u maintain good form and i think nourishes a healthy mindset toward working out/yourself in general

n you are definitely right about diet playing a huge part. don't worry about bulking/cutting when ur first starting out, most important thing is making sure you're getting enough protein. if u are iron deficient i would look into taking a supplement! dont know all the science but iron keeps ur oxygen flowing better, so your stamina can be down if ur iron count is low. my mindset about diet is the simpler the better and u should never be miserable lol. i will never give up beer & pizza & a good time 🫡

second most important thing is sleep. make sure u get enough.

1. back/shoulders and biceps

going to the gym can be a little scary, but that's where having a routine helps so much 🧑‍💻doing one of those dynamic workout routines u find on an instagram reel every now and then can be fun and i recommend it. BUT doing a random workout Everytime u workout will make it difficult to see results. doing the same workouts is how u can see ur progression better and focus on good form. im talking about learning the basics of benching, squatting, and deadlifting. 😜✌🏼

if u can, i would aim a routine of 3-4 times a week. I kept it like this:

2. leg day and abs

3. chest and triceps

what helped in staying consistent w going to the gym was having a set time where i would go. ritualistic

4th extra day: fun cardio like interval training or boxing. OR if i was feeling like i just needed a chill day a slow incline walk on treadmill/outside😊 then do some really intense stretching/foam rolling

here is an example of a chest/tris day

The 3 "T's" stand for tiers starting with the most difficult exercises, so I could use most of the energy I have on it.

To elaborate further on how to see progress: say this week you're able to bench press 60lbs. Next week you try 70lbs on your last rep and it's kinda hard. The third week, you bench 60lbs again, and it feels a little easier now. The fourth week, you're benching 70lbs on your last two sets. By the fifth week, you find you're able to do your entire workout with 70! Etc repeat etc

when i first started i kept one of those tiny composition books w different workouts and id also keep track of how much i was lifting when i reached a new pr/mile time/etc. u can also just keep this in ur notes app. but i found having the paper in front of me was more efficient than continuously looking at my phone and fighting the urge to check apps in between sets lol. also if i was getting texts id have No Idea which just helped me reinforce the gym was Me Time

before u buy into a gym membership tho, take advantage if they have a free trial. u can find what time is least busy/if the vibe fits for u.

another tip. put a photo 1985 bruce on ur wall trust me this will help.

I can go more indepth about specific workouts or if u got other questions, lmk!

U got this!

[yomiurinikei]

Hello! I enjoy your blog and hearing you talk about the another cast! (I got into the franchise in like late August, am addicted) uh what would you say is your favorite hcs for some of the characters?

.....i never answered this i am SO sorry </3 gonna try to list off random hcs for a mix of characters!!

1)yuuki + nikei bond over drinking a absurd amount of soda. yuuki drinking mountain dew will always be real to me, and we knowww nikei likes weird and obscure sodas

2)kizuna struggles with being possessive over her items and doesn't like people borrowing her stuff, but if she actually tried it, she'd realize she really likes buying gifts for people

3)kanata isn't super into fashion but she likes feeling pretty, and often feels cute in like... flowy dresses, but she rarely has the time/energy, and feels a bit weird "dressing up"

4)while he felt more in his element in the killing game/had reason to distance himself from the class, and not try to bond with them, in non-despair verses, tsurugi feels really awkward around the others, and has a hard time engaging and making friends. part of this is because he befriended kouhei via kouhei looking at him and going "is for me?", part of it is because he's. ya know. still extremely traumatized by the uh... other thing that happened with kouhei

5)kinji can't draw for shit. like, objectively speaking, he can't get his pencil to do what he wants

6)yoruko dedicates one day a week to taking care of her hair, nails, skin, etc. it helps her feel in control + comfortable with her experience after being bullied, but once she does some more healing with her past, she realizes it's just genuinely soothing now

7)emma isn't very popular with her fellow actors. she tends to isolate a lot when on set, and isn't close with her co-stars. she's very friendly with reports, fans, et cetera though.

8)haruhiko is very "man i wish i liked dudes, girls are totally sweet, but sometimes i wish i could date guys too..." not realizing he literally just described an attraction to both genders.

9)im just generally a queer yuri truther. i remember seeing people say hc'ing him as lgbt was gross. i for one think that looking at how he acts in canon and going "yeah this is fine and healthy and indicative of a good mental status" is gross.

10)mikako had a "not like other girls" phase which she has officially left behind her, but only semi-recently. while working on undoing that mentality, she realized she's sapphic (i hc her as a-spec too tho, maybe aro lesbian? my identity hcs change every three seconds whoopsie)

11)speaking of. EVERYONE TRANS!!! i esp like transhet shinji tho that has a special place in my heart. he's big bro, ur honor <3

okay i want to say more BUT i have a lab due in a few hours and dont want to fall class so. the end!!!!! oh fuck i have to tag this.

[cowboyjen68]

Hi! I am a lesbian about to graduate and go off to college (I hope it’s okay I’m sending this). And was wondering if you had advice on safely navigating a new area as an lgbtq person, and how to not feel alone. I was lucky to grow up surrounded by accepting people, but I still feel like a sore thumb, and I am naturally a quiet unapproachable person. My fear is that I will go right back into hiding and maybe never stop. People say that it’ll be fine but it’s hard to believe them. I’m terrified.

It is ALWAYS ok to send me Ask. I say thay are always open and I mean it. I try very hard to get to them but right now I am behind and it truly bugs me. But we do what we can when we can and I am no exception to that rule.

I went to college is a small Missouri town, moving from a small midwest high school. Luckily it was pretty chill and liberal so while I met a lot of LGBT friends (or those exploring the notion) I was not ready to come out until after graduation. I had just moved to Iowa CIty to be closer to home and work and go to grad school. U of I is HUGE and sprawling and I was workng a new job (political fundraiser ie door knocker) that paid the bills AND gave me health insurance. It was 1991.

Even though I am outgoing and make friends easily it was a bit over whelming. I happen to move in with 5 gay men from my job and they introduced me to their world and friends. I had an "in" that eventually led me to have a larger friend circle. BUT here is my advice

FInd something you are interested in and join it. Theatre, yoga, Sci Fi, animal rescue volunteering. It does not have to be an offical club nor LGBT Centric. It also does not need to require a lot of time or money. Freshman year is a over whelming and exciting but making the time to do something you enjoy with others who enjoy it is a good way to at least form a circle of familiar faces around campus. Sad to say EVEN back in the 90's the "gay groups" I did attend (as an ally of course) were clique and awkward for me. I felt like the infringing new person. I hope that has changed, but I have my doubts.

There are some groups and activities that will have a concentration of LGBT people without that being the focus. Theatre, animal rescue, environmental, politics (be wary of echo chambers) and some intramural sports. Volley ball and softball, even coed will have a fair share of lesbians. But so might gaming clubs or frisbee golf. Dont forget about book clubs or Sci fi or Ren Fest groups. Once you make some connections with other who share some common ground with you, you might gain some confidence it making friends in the more narrow LGBT social or official groups.

What is really more important that a large friend group is a few people you can trust and get to know. Once you leave college many of your college friends will naturally navigate out of your life. That is normal and expected because it a time in life of drastic change and growth. But if you find that one or two who will be worth hanging on to you can work less on many people and put your energy into someone who does the same for ou. IF you befriend an extravert that is a bonus because she will make tsure you have social interactions whether you want them or not.

College people are just high schoolers a year or two down the road. Just people. Like you. Say "hello" and smile and ask to sit and chat. The worst they can say is "no" or "im not interested" but more often you will make at least an acquaintance . A familar face to see on campus as time moves on. Or you make a friend worth getting to know.

[marimbles]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for the tag @jattendschaton<3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

29

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

283,369

3. What fandoms do you write for?

mostly miraculous ladybug and a bit of owl house! potentially a couple others in the future

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Why Are You Like This?

tell me something i don't know

lucky (we're in love in every way)

some truths are loyal (as the shadows we lead)

two idiots and a hamster

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try to! it means a lot to me that people would go out of their way to leave their thoughts. sometimes it's a bit hard to keep up on multichaps though if the updates are frequent enough so i really fell off the bandwagon and currently live in shame with an overflowing inbox;; trying to do better from now on!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

tbh i don't really do angsty endings bc i want the ending to be happy lol

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

like i said, all my fics have a happy ending but i think lucky is probably the most like extra-fluffy happy ending. and then tell me something i don't know is probably the most cathartic happy ending purely for the dramatic 100k+ buildup lol.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not really, no! maybe a sort of disappointed comment here and there

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope and i don't read it either haha

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

nah

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

haha i hope not!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

a few in russian and one in spanish (the beginning of it, at least)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yep! @botherkupo was my collab partner for two idiots and a hamster and i had a blast writing with her!! kim is such a good writer and sooo clever and funny so it was really fun to try to match her energy and bounce ideas off each other to make it as silly as possible

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

love square and in particular marichat is my weakness<3 also big shoutout to huntlow. and also zelink. and also recently tamaharu. aklsjf

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

at this point im not sure i will ever come back to i wanna tell you (but i don't know how) … it's an owl house fic that i started during season 3 but the direction i had planned doesn't feel very relevant anymore now that the show is over

16. What are your writing strengths?

i think dialogue bc i really enjoy writing it and it typically comes most easily to me! i would consider humor a strength too bc i have a very good time being silly

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

big one is speed. I'm just very slow 😔 the writing process is fairly painstaking for me, and it takes a lot of time and effort even to write things that are pretty short and simple! agonies

for the writing itself, i consider myself a pretty simple writer with a pretty simple writing style—which works well for me most of the time, especially since I tend to lean toward humor. but sometimes it feels like a weakness when i read a story with really rich, beautiful prose and i wish i could emulate that a bit more! when i'm trying for something with a more serious tone it takes a lot more effort for me to convey the appropriate level of depth I'm going for and i worry about going overboard and coming off as overwrought or cheesy sounding lol. along the same vein i feel sometimes that my characterization is a bit two-dimensional and i find myself wishing i could add more levels and depth to the characters. there's just a lot i try to balance in my writing and i don't feel like im quite striking that balance every time. which is fine because no one's perfect ofc! i hope this is all stuff i can learn to be better at.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i generally prefer keeping everything in english since im writing in english. it just feels a bit smoother for the POV if there would be no distinction for the character, and i don't want people to be pulled out of the story if they need to google something

19. First fandom you wrote for?

hunger games, i think

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

tell me something i don't know C:

tagging (if you want to!): @fairytales-and-folklore @lollytea @bahbahhh @sha-nwa @botherkupo @taliaxlatia (or whatever blog u wanna do it on lol)

[soemthingsparkly]

i would absolutely love to share a rant!

all the characters are so psychologically fucked up in such a realistic way that i didn't see represented much. grian venting to tango about feeling left out. the fact that he felt left out at all over something so small. they're so codependent and i love it.

and then there's scott and jimmy's dynamic. scott kissing jimmy and then jimmy venting to grian and then grian just responding with "HE DID WHAT??????" and then at the cafe. the idea of someone doing something they shouldn't have and then having a panic attack over a third party's opinion on it is so... idk how to say it. like i said, a type of fucked up that you don't see talked about much and i relate so hard to it. it's clear scott's probably trying his best out at least trying a lot to not hurt jimmy but he's failing miserably and i don't think he even realizes it. and like. yeah. ive been there. i don't actually know why scott broke up with him but i get the vibe it was supposed to be like. to help jimmy in some way. like "oh wait ive been toxic maybe i should end this for his sake". but doing that obviously hurt jimmy, especially since he didn't say *why* he did it. and scott obviously did something really drastic and sudden so he's not doing well either and he really wants to go back to jimmy. he knows he's being manipulative and it's not on purpose but in trying to stop and be better he keeps making things worse. and like. this is all a side thing. this fic is mostly about mumscarian and you threw in this flower husbands sideplot but it's still so fleshed out and so *real*.

and speaking of the mumscarian thing the way you write their friendships, especially grian and mumbo's is amazing. it's not like. a stepping stone to a romantic relationship even though they are going to end up in one. very "not more than friends, different from friends" vibes /vpos. it doesn't feel like they're ending up in a romantic relationship. it feels like they're making their relationship romantic and i love that so much.

grian just texting mumbo that he's bored gives such hcs7 vibes and like he yeah they're so codependent and it's so obvious from grian's side my god

and the way you write pearl is amazing, she's got this sibling energy and it's great.

the way you write all of them is amazing actually. i can hear everything they say in their voices. the clockers are on point, especially scar and bdubs.

i could keep going im sure lmao but anyway great fic i love it if you read this ill cry /pos

This has been sitting in my ask box for a while because I just love it so much anon and I was like~~~ how do I respond to such a long ask with the same level of enthusiam?

I wanna break this ask into chunks and there's bits of your ask I wanna respond to directly, so...

all the characters are so psychologically fucked up in such a realistic way that i didn't see represented much.

I'm glad you think so! I definitely feel like I'm being a little bit risky with how I'm presenting some of the, I suppose, human consequences of being human?

I think a lot of what fandom (in general) consumes gets a little over-sanitised these days. Our favourite characters aren't allowed to be flawed like real people, they must be flawed in a way that is either endearing, entertaining (sarcastic or snarky), or easily forgivable.

But that's not always that interesting when it comes to wanting characters we can truly relate to?

Grian gets upset he's left out not just because he has Trauma™, but because he does have a co-dependancy on Mumbo that borders on unhealthy. Tango tells Grian to, in not so many words, get over himself and try and have fun - not because he knew Grian would respond well to it, but because he's blunt and doesn't know how to comfort people gently. Bdubs makes fun of Scar for being disabled, because he knows that everybody in that group chat understands he's joking and that his comments will never leave that group chat (in-world that is, of course, everybody who reads the fic will read them).

And Scott for example, is not a very well-liked character amongst readers at the moment, but he's absolutely one of my favourite to write. You put it pretty well here:

he knows he's being manipulative and it's not on purpose but in trying to stop and be better he keeps making things worse.

Like yes, exactly. He's trying to do better, but the actions he takes that he thinks (or is being co-erced into believing via mental illness) will make things better, keep making things worse and he doesn't really understand how to do it right. And haven't we all been in that position before?

And yet up until chapter 17, we've only ever seen into their dynamic from the outside. We've only ever seen Scott's actions from Jimmy's POV or from the POV of someone who cares about Jimmy.

And somehow it's Jimmy, of all people, defending Scott.

It's absolutely fascinating to see readers reactions and I'd be so happy to talk about this forever and ever and ever, hehehe.

And what you said about Mumbo and Grian's relationship, here:

very "not more than friends, different from friends" vibes /vpos. it doesn't feel like they're ending up in a romantic relationship. it feels like they're making their relationship romantic and i love that so much.

I'm actually SO glad you feel that way about them, because that's exactly the way I feel about them, too. They're not just friends, so much as they're Grian and Mumbo. The idea of them being friends almost suggests an alternative of them being not friends and I just don't there's a way in this world that they can exist and be without one another. So yes, I love this a lot and I love that you feel that way about them.

Thank you so much for this absolutely beautiful message - I am such a fan of analysing characters and their interactions and all that. Frankly, thank you for giving me a space to talk at length about the way these characters are in this fic!!

Here is a tissue for the tears, I hope you don't cry too hard. Remember to stay hydrated <333

Lumi <3