#corona can't stop me

[crabussy]

TO PREFACE. this post is ONLY about the people who openly boast about this and act like they're better than people who do wear masks. the rest of you, drink some water and I love you okay?

I'm so so tired of seeing people SO PROUD of the fact that they refuse to wear a mask. it is such a small, small inconvenience to you but its so important to you that you prolong the pandemic and cause more suffering and death. when you parade your ignorance around I want you to remember this number:

6,910,810

thats the number of deaths from covid-19. that's the total number of people who have died because of the virus as of August 29 2023. it's repulsive how you don't even stop to think about the elderly, those with autoimmune diseases, the already sick or disabled who have such a high chance of dying if they are exposed to even one person with the virus. My dad is now disabled from long covid. he hasn't been able to ride his bike, his favourite activity in the world, for over half a year. and he's one of the least affected by the virus. My friend (no longer around) with an autoimmune disease could not travel for three years because aeroplanes were such a high risk zone for her because people weren't wearing masks in such close proximity.

please I am begging you. inconvenience yourself. people are dying.

I know the death toll is dwindling and thats fantastic but it's not over yet.

[alchemistc]

He's drunk when he sends it. Pissed because Buck won't just let this die. Tired of seeing his name flash across his screen, texts full of anger and sadness and hurt.

I suspect you've already met your last and it's not me he sends, and then turns off his phone and reaches for the bottle of whiskey on his top shelf.

---

If he'd been sober he would have known better. It's not even like it's been a pervasive thought - just an inkling at the start of things that seemed to be completely off base once he got to know everyone better, but looking back... He can see it. The built in life. The steadfast support. The knowledge that they'd always, always have each other's back. The kid who hero worshipped him.

The thing is he's fielding texts from Eddie, too, checking in and then circling around to being so goddamn judgmental that it's like they've coordinated their attacks to give Tommy no room to breathe.

He ended it to save himself from slipping so far under the surface he wouldn't make it back.

The fact that he's lost them both to his own fear is icing on the cake for the demon on his shoulder that keeps trying to remind him that once upon a time he'd fully thought Eddie and Buck were amicable exes.

---

He has to blink to figure out who's standing on his doorstep. The mustache is gone.

"If you meant who I think you mean, you're dumber than you look," Eddie says, and shoulders past Tommy before Tommy can even muster an affronted expression.

Tommy wanders after Eddie into his own kitchen, immediately annoyed that he looks more at home there than Tommy has felt in weeks. He'd gotten used to the loft - the space, the echoes, the lights of the city. The smell of his own aftershave on Buck's pillow.

They never spent much time here. The loft was closer - to Harbor, to the 118, to all the things in the city that tempted them out for a night. And staying at the loft meant he wouldn't have the echoes of Buck in every room, around every corner. (The echoes are in him, instead, and he still feels the absence like a lanced wound.) Tommy has always been good at making other people think he's good at putting distance between himself and them.

Eddie digs in a drawer, pulls out the bottle opener shaped like a cow and pops two tops. Holds one out for Tommy and scowls when Tommy wrinkles his nose at the Corona.

"Absolutely screw you if you think I'm driving halfway across town for you just to get the ones you like, right now."

Tommy can't argue that. He takes a drag and swallows. Stares. Is everyone else experiencing whiplash seeing him without the mustache? It looks fine but it'd taken so much fucking work to get used to it and now it's just gone. Clean shaven, an acre of skin he hasn't seen in months.

Tommy blinked and the entire world was different. Tommy freaked and the world changed.

"What are you doing here?"

Eddie's eyebrows both lift, a frank Are You Fucking Serious look on his face that makes Tommy want to take him to the mats and have it out in the garage instead of over beers.

"Buck may be spinning his wheels trying to figure out what the fuck you meant but I know damn well what you were implying."

That seems unlikely. Eddie always seems to be the last person to have a single clue what was going on, with Buck scraping in just before him. It's a tight race.

He used to find it charming.

(He absolutely does not still find it charming, he tells his heart, and wonders if he could hire some tiny asshole gnome to go stomp around in an atrium or two and get it to stop doing what it's doing. Fucking traitor.)

"Do you actually believe that, or is it some dumb excuse because you're terrified of being happy?"

Oh, that's fucking rich.

Tommy opens his mouth to tell him exactly that but Eddie just steamrolls right by him. "You don't have to point out the hypocrisy, jackass. I'm well aware of my own issues. Thing is - you're like, almost right. Buck does make me happy. Next to Chris there's no one else in the world I'd rather have by my side, rain or shine, good or bad. I love him. He's my person."

Tommy rolls his jaw. It's not a vindication to hear it.

"Except I'm not gay, Tommy. And I don't want that. I never have. And neither does Buck, just in case that argument was about to hit the airwaves."

"How do you know?"

Something sparks in the back of Eddie's eyes. Understanding. Triumph.

"You want an itemized list or a demonstration?"

Which is when Tommy knows he's stepped into an absolute minefield. No markers. Just free balling his way through a conversation that could explode with even the slightest pressure.

Eddie's got his phone out.

None of this is ideal.

When he looks up, his eyes land squarely on Tommy, who would like in this moment to be able to curl so far in on himself he gets sucked clean through the other side. "First of all, Buck may have just been improvising his entire journey of sexuality but for once I was trying to get ahead of the curve so that whole starry-eyed newly not straight vision you have of Buck is bullshit. You let him pull you along by the shirt strings for months without pressing pause and then you freak out when he thinks his speed and your speed are the same speed?"

This is feeling a whole lot like an ambush, now.

"Did you ever even try to slow him down?"

Tommy has some choice words that aren't remotely appropriate to say to someone who is at least tangentially still his friend, so he takes another swig of shitty beer. God, this shit is awful.

"You wanna know how I know I'm not his one? How I know he's not mine?"

Tommy really, really doesn't. Honestly he'd like to kick him out.

"Because he went at our friendship at the same warp speed pace he took your relationship and it never fucking scared me."

Proof in the pudding, for Tommy. He's not the sort of jackass who actually thinks he can make a different judgement call on someone else's sexuality than the one they've made themselves, but come on.

"Shannon's been dead for half a decade," Eddie says, voice dropping so suddenly Tommy feels it like an icy draft. "And maybe one day I'll make my peace with that. Maybe one day I'll get out from under it. The point is I've lost them both and the loss wasn't the goddamn same."

"Buck came back," Tommy argues.

Eddie scoffs. Wrinkles his nose. "Jeez, he wasn't kidding about how weird that sounds." His phone buzzes on the countertop, and Tommy wonders what the hell that look on his face means. "Don't change the subject. I'm not here to talk you into anything. I'm just here to drink a beer with you and tell you how goddamn stupid it is to think that an uncertain future with Evan Buckley isn't worth every second of terror it causes you."

"You don't know me as well as you think you do."

Eddie tips the bottle against his lips. Swallows. God, why hadn't Tommy just pursued the self-proclaimed straight guy for a couple weeks before he scratched the itch somewhere else and kept a friend, instead?

"Maybe." Eddie tips his head. "Maybe I do, though. Maybe in the months and months you were invited to all my mopey nights in with Buck and all the crazy crap we end up involved in at the station and all the times you couldn't shut up about him when he wasn't around and all the times I got to see you falling ass over teakettle for my best friend, I learned a fucking thing or two about Tommy Kinard." He wags his head back and forth. "Maybe."

"Is there a point to this?"

Eddie tips his eyes to his phone, and it's probably too late at this point for the suspicion to begin to creep in.

"I mostly just came to confront you about your completely off base bullshit excuses, but there's actually a pretty simple solution to at least one of your multitude of issues, so. Now we're waiting."

Tommy doesn't like the sound of that at all.

"Chris is mad at you, by the way."

It's a distraction. It's fully a - "Why is he mad at me?"

"I should actually thank you, because it's the first time he's actively talked to me in months," Eddie continues, like Tommy hadn't asked a question. "He's pissed because Buck is sad and there's literally nothing in the world that gets a rise out of the Diaz boys like sad Buck."

"You can just say you're pissed at me and go, Eddie."

"Oh I'm angry. Don't think I'm not. Mostly I'm just sad for you. You had six months to get to know Buck and never thought to yourself 'hes going to love me and it's going to hurt' until he skipped too far ahead in the program."

And that's - kind of the final straw. He's let Eddie get his licks in. He deserves it, he knows he does. Honestly it's a little cathartic to hear - to know exactly what Buck has spent his time dissecting post-Tommy. "That's all I ever thought about. Do you think I didn't know going in? I tried to put a stop to it before it even started and he just doubled down! Do you think for a second I wasn't viscously aware that I was setting myself up for -."

No. He's not gonna say it. He's not giving that to Eddie when he couldn't even give it to Ev-Buck. When he couldn't give it to Buck.

Eddie looks victorious anyway.

"And for six months you thought it was worth it."

"For six months I was too much of a coward to stop thinking about it."

Eddie drains the rest of his beer. "I'm not gonna lie. You screwed up pretty bad. Like. Astronomically bad. Giving up your location in a firefight bad."

Tommy does everything he can not to wince.

"It's salvageable, though. If you want it to be. If there's anything I know about Buck it's that second chances are his bread and butter." He's been dancing around saying anything of substance about Buck's feelings, in all of this, but the hints are there. As if the bouts of angry-depressive texts from Buck weren't clue enough.

"And what if it's not what I want?"

Eddie's eyes dart to his phone one more time. "Then you can make it a clean break in about ... three and a half minutes."

Tommy nearly tosses his beer across the room.

[shojizbae]

Rave Baby

Spencer Reid x Reader

After a long case, some of the team pitstops at your apartment, and Morgan takes the liberty of searching through some memories. He comes across some scandalous photos that light a fire in Reid.

This last case was challenging. To make it worse, the power had gone out in DC due to a blackout. With a chirp, I told the team that I always had a generator and that we could cool with some coronas in my fridge. Hotch had declined, stating the necessity of returning to his wife and son. I had thrown open all the windows and cranked the AC, attempting to push out all the hot air. With my permission, Derek had distributed beers from my fridge and found a bag of chips.

A battery-powered radio was located, and my CDs were run through to find something to unwind with. With a sigh, Emily sank onto my couch and sipped her beer.

"Uhh, I can't tell you how nice your apartment is."

"Yeah," JJ groaned from the corner, holding her hair up and sticking her face in the AC vent. Derek was still looking through my belongings when he came across a Scooter CD.

"Well, well, well, where did a girl like you find this type of music?" I looked at the album cover.

"Oh, that's from my college days." I tried to dismiss it. This isn't the sort of stuff I would share with my coworkers.

"Really? Let's go ahead and pop this in."

"No don't!" I tried to launch it at him before he could open it, but it was too late. A few photos I took the night I bought that CD slipped into his lap.

"Woah ho ho!" Spencer, who had been content to sift through my shitty romance novels, peaked his head up like a prairie dog at the sound of Derek's chuckle. "What do we have here?" He held up one photo, and I hid behind my beer bottle.

"That was years ago," I whined

"What is this?" Spencer came to the group, attention fully peaked

"It's (Y/n). At a rave." Spencer snatched the photo out of Morgans's hand like a cat but Emily nearly yelled

"Shut up, let me see." she slammed her glass bottle on the table and grabbed one of the photos from him

"No way," JJ stated, following Spencer into the circle to look at the evidence. "I could never imagine you at a rave. I've seen you get upset that you left your clothes in the washing machine."

"They'll get moldy," I whined

"Holy shit. Where was this?" Emily inspects a photo of me in a bikini, fluffy leg warmers, and a matching bucket hat. "Look at your butt where were you hiding this." She makes an attempt to check me out, but I sink further into my couch

"I don't know, I was never sober in the 72 hours around a rave."

"Oh yeah? What did you take?" Morgan begged

"All sorts of crap, mostly hallucinogens. My rave mentor told me music is better when you're high."

"So why'd you stop going?" Emily asked

"I grew up."

"You grew up?" JJ asked, putting the photo on the table

"Yeah," I rubbed my hands up and down my thigh and sighed. I wasn't entirely ready to trauma-dump the team, but here I was. "My uncle, who basically raised me, passed on Thanksgiving in the sophomore year of my bachelor's. Hallucinogens made it easy not to grieve, and loud music blocked my ability to think. I would dance around and tell everyone that 'tonight was the night,' and I was 'finally free,' but I would just see him after a while. He would ask me, 'Why are you doing this, my dove?'. I couldn't ignore him anymore, so I just stopped. Put all my teeny bikinis in a box and put it past me." I cleared my throat, realizing that I had put a damper on the mood

"We could play the CD. I think I'll still remember the rhythm." I switched in the discs and let the synth radiate through my living room. Immediately, I felt the groove, letting it carry my limbs airily around me. I felt myself disconnect as the beat continued to pump. Before I could drift away wholly, Emilie's voice brought me down to earth.

"You packed all this away? That means you still have it?"

"Yeah, in a box in the back of my closet." before I could discover my mistake, she darted to the back of my apartment, and JJ took off with her.

"Oh hell, I gotta see this." Derek got up and dropped the last of the photos. Reid dutifully packed them up and sifted through the photos, stopping on one.

"What did you find, Spence?" I crawled toward him slowly. I gasped at the photo. My Rave mom, Zoe, who was only 4 months older than me, and I were posing together. He sifted through the images with it and stacked them. I gasped at the image. The photo on the top was of Zoe throwing up a peace sign, showing the neon pink paint on her palms, and a green hand was playfully on my throat. Both of our bodies had been splattered with neon ain't, but noticeably, I had two big hands brink on the triangle bikini we wore. One pink, one green.

The picture below was of Zoe and I very dramatically kissing. Zoe had made smudged hand prints on my ass. I had a leg up on her hip, and you could see drool and lipstick around each other mouths.

"I hardly even remember that night, and I thought it was trendy to act gay." I pulled the pictures from his hand and returned them to the case. "I'm sorry you had to see that."

"Why are you apologizing? Y-you had fun."

"Yeah, but you're my colleague. This is embarrassing and you probably are ashamed of me."

"Actually, I'm jealous. In college, I had no friends and didn't go to parties. I was, I am, a loser. You had fun."

"Did you not hear my spiel about using drugs not to think?"

"Yeah, but you were hot." That shocked you. He was only two beers deep, and Reid was spilling his secrets.

You laughed in shock.

"Spencer, you can't say things like that." I slapped at his chest playfully.

"WELL!" I could hear Derek's strained voice. "This!" he put the giant plastic tub on the floor next to us. "This is one heavy bucket of slutty clothes."

"I want to try something on!" JJ greedily popped the snaps on the cover. With giggles, JJ and Emily started pulling out bikinis that looked like they were made out of spider webs.

"Woah ho ho!" Derek giggled, holding up a low-rise thong. "I hope you wore a jacket."

"Alright, that's enough!" I grabbed it from his reach

"Hey, could I borrow one of these?" JJ asked. "Will has been asking for something new."

"Yeah, but don't borrow it. I don't want it back." I made a face of disgust

"Yeah, I might want to just wear one around my apartment?" Emily held something balled up

"Take as many as you want. I won't wear them again. I should sell them. I could finally go on vacation."

"Woah woah woah, if you sell these, what will you wear on vacation?" Derek joked

"Clothes." I snatched another piece of hosiery from him. My knees cracked as I stood and got another beer from the kitchen. "Now, get out of my panties." I swatted him with the bottoms as I walked by

by some stroke of God, the lights flicked back on, and across the street, I could see the surrounding building come back to life.

"Well, I've got to get to my house before my ice cream spoils." Emily stood and collected a few pieces of fabric.

"Yeah, and completely unrelated. I have to call Will." JJ juts out her lip in an admission of guilt. They snuck out the door, giggling and tucking crazy fabric in their bags.

"I should get going too, wonder boy. You need a ride home?"

"No, I should be fine. There's a train in the next hour." Reid was still immersed in the photos.

"Well, don't bug her too badly." He left with a wink

"Why are you still looking at those? They're ancient."

"The date on the back says 1998, making you 20 years old. You're 28." Finally, he puts the photos down. "I'm having a hard time picturing you going to a rave. You only read sappy novels from the seventies. I saw three copies of Tuck Everlasting on your shelves." All the talk from my coworkers and the five beers in my system made me more than angry and bold.

Stupid ideas were my biggest export when I was inebriated.

"Well, I know the FBI has kept me in shape. I'm going to my bedroom and try these on." I gave a coy smile as I took a handful of sets and strutted off to the back of my place.

"W-what do you mean you're going to try them on."

"I've gotta see if they still fit."

[abigail-pent]

Thoughts on rereading NTN for the (idk probably 4th or 5th) time:

- John and Pal each have specific, one-on-one "nobody has the right" conversations with the perspective character. but John's version of "nobody has the right" ends with "to judge you for mass murder" and Pal's ends with "to tell you who to love"

- it's interesting that Pal says Pyrrha was "made to be immune to the blue light" because like... how *did* the Lyctors figure out that their cavs would protect their bodies and were immune to the RBs? maybe Pyrrha said something about this to Pal at some point? idk

- I feel like I somehow missed, before, that Cam and Pal showed the Oversight Body "the secret of the installation" and got the whole Sixth House to move via stele to Ur? Not just the Oversight Body, but the whole House!

- I think Nona is alternately dreaming herself into the pool scene as Harrow (day one) and dreaming herself as Alecto in the Tomb with Anastasia (day two). In the day two dream, she's ravenously hungry, there are red eyes all around (sort of like the glow worms in the Tomb), and she can't tell the difference between her hands and the other person's hands. The only reason I think she dreamed as Harrow the first time is because she said she saw the "picture face" - which is Gideon's face.

- I will never stop being fascinated by Pyrrha's description of how her trial was developed. The only people who practiced "overlapping" (winnowing/transference) in the trial were her and Gideon, and Mercy and Cris, because every time they did it they would need to replace the cavalier's brain fluid.

- I might never be okay again after reading "I don't let go. It's my one thing."

- Corona saying that she'll give Gideon's rapier back if she asks, but otherwise "finders keepers"... hmmm.... ominous

- "the Second House installation" was abandoned 3 months prior to the beginning of NTN

- Crown says her hair is naturally big and manageable

- it's really hitting me this time how happy Camilla is to be with Palamedes, to be Paul, even if it means no longer being herself. she says it to Pyrrha after she's shot and was together in her head with Palamedes for a little while - "it was good. we were happy." Crown says she knows Palamedes is sharing Camilla's body because Camilla is happy. she's a casualty of devotion. it's giving "for I cannot be mine own, nor any thing to any, if I be not thine."

- "you and I don't even own our own souls" 👀👀 (not the first time this has jumped out to me, it's just so portentous!)

- interesting that Nona appears to mispronounce Born in the Morning's name to Hot Sauce, but then when Hot Sauce says it back to her she still hears it as "Born in the Morning."

- I'm not sure I really clocked it before but Hot Sauce is so vehemently anti-BoE ("traitors! fat cats! zombie lovers!") while at the same time being so devoted to Aim. She says that one of Born in the Morning's fathers is active in the group that runs the park cages, and distinguishes that pretty clearly from Blood of Eden. So even though We Suffer says that BoE is a "house with many rooms," the faction running the park cages (which I thought was Unjust Hope and Merv Wing, but maybe not) considers itself outside the house entirely. But even so, they remain loyal to Aim. Or it sort of looks like that, anyway, but then later Hot Sauce refers to Aim as "the asset" who "doesn't have to trust you" - so Hot Sauce thinks she's cultivating Aim as an asset, either for Unjust Hope or for someone totally outside of BoE. But then again, when Nona goes to the generator room where Hot Sauce is locked in, Hot Sauce basically says she didn't realize that Aim had a bodyguard; so I think she's trying to cultivate Aim as an asset for some entity totally outside BoE, without understanding who Aim is or why they are so important to BoE.

- Locked Tomb universe You're Wrong About episode idea: the so-called "cow wall" was not just cows, it was sheep too! but we all memory-holed the sheep! do sheep have best friends? do sheep exhibit mourning behavior for other sheep??

- the person who told Nona "once you've stepped in, you're in. this isn't the hokey pokey" is almost certainly John. it just really sounds like John when he's talking to Harrow in either HTN or the NTN dream sequences.

- Alecto wonders why "anything that hurt them only ever hurt briefly, but anger took such a long time to go away."

- John says it will take him ten thousand years to figure out the math the billionaires used for the FTL. Hmmmmmmm

- Pash's eyes are a "lovely hazelly yellowy-green color". Does that confirm that Wake carries the recessive lipochrome gene? Like I know Gideon's eyes couldn't be that way without it, but Wake either had the gene when she was born or she mutated to have it somehow. I think Pash's eyes suggest the former.

- Nona is dying because Alecto's soul is foreign to Harrow.

- Cam says Corona can't lie to Ianthe. Can't, not won't.

- in the Nine Houses, "fuck marry kill" becomes "marry kill reanimate"!!!!

- First Wake and then We Suffer are both desperate to break into the Locked Tomb. I'm not totally sure why, though. We understand from HTN that Wake is sent by Mercy and Augustine to try to break the Tomb open, but this is long before anybody knows what Alecto is to John. I suppose it's common knowledge in the Houses that the Tomb houses the "death of the emperor", and BoE would know that from all the Lyctors that defect to them over the millennia, so maybe that's it? They want to break in because they know it will make John vulnerable in some sense, but they don't know exactly how, and they don't really have a plan for what comes after?

- Corona telling Pyrrha she doesn't trust her or her motives, because she hasn't thought about her family in the last thousand years... meanwhile Cam and Pal and Nona are her family now... oof ow ouch

- Corona: "Nobody should ever trust me" I'M SORRY???

- Pal says Varun is transmitting something through the light spectrum and that "absorption through the eyes is worst for the brain" and it makes Nona think of something, but we never learn what. It seems to me that whatever it is, is related to the Lyctoral eye swap; but obviously I can't confirm.

- NOT NONA THINKING OF HOT SAUCE WHEN SHE'S TRYING TO WALK LIKE HARROWHARK!!! 😭😭😭

- I hate to admit it but Cassy is dead; but didn't she give instructions to the Sixth House 6000 years ago? What does that do to the timeline of the early Lyctors?

- Nona's scream in the barracks only affected people with necromantic bodies...

- Kiriona carries a rapier (the one John tried to give Harrow?) and an offhand with rivets

- Varun says that Alecto asked for help and he came. So maybe that's it - the RBs aren't chasing John for his own sake, or because he killed them or ate Alecto; they are chasing because Alecto asked for their help to stop him.

- I kind of think John saying he has plans for G--'s arm is a thing from immediately post-Resurrection. Like - except for G--, he has the body of every other member of his inner circle at what becomes the Canaan House facility after the Resurrection. He even has the body of "M--'s nun," although it looks like a pile of wet brown clothes and has not come through the water well. I think he needs their bodies to resurrect them; for G--, he starts with the copy arm and builds him a new body, and that's why it looks so fucked up and Protesilaus-like by the time of HTN.

- I really think John saying "God must be able to touch all of creation" is his real, full motive. The actual trillionaires themselves are long dead. Augustine is right, no one else has to be punished for what happened to humanity. John says he can't forget, but what he can't forget is that his dominion is not absolute. There are places and people that his power cannot touch. That's the real crime. The whole of everywhere isn't submitting to him, and that's what the punishment is for.

- Why doesn't the River want to touch the truck? The River has touched many RBs before, so it's not just that Varun and Alecto are on board.

- "You left them too long, my salt thing" feels like confirmation, to me, that the Tower is filled with the souls of the ten billion - whoever John didn't resurrect, or kept in reserve. We already know that souls in the River are supposed to go mad after a few months; Abigail and Palamedes are each shocked to find how long they've been bubbled in there. Imagine being a soul left in the River for ten thousand years! And then John resurrects some people - so, perhaps bringing their souls back from storage in the Tower, which may be a bubble of his making ("where did all the people go?" Alecto asked, "where have you put them?") - and he sends them to the Ninth, where the tongue things appear very shortly afterwards. I don't think that's a coincidence!

- Nona says she's seen "gray things" before once, and didn't feel up to seeing them again. That has to be from her time as Alecto.

- the chain of a kiss (between Alecto and Anastasia)! the favor of the chain (owed to Ianthe by Harrow)! is this anything????

- there are many, many thesis statements for the Locked Tomb set out in NTN. but I think a really underrated moment is when Gideon yells at Crux: "did you know I was God's child?" like - all the abuse he threw at her would not have been acceptable to throw at a child of God; but aren't we all children of God. it's sort of trite as a statement, but I adore how when Muir gives Gideon this line, it doesn't feel trite at all.

- Alecto finds the River "yet dead." Ten points to Abigail Pent!

[ienjoywritingfilth]

Love me More

Wow you guys really liked the M.A. story and it made me feel so good that I finished this filthy little tale in record time. thanks for reblogging and commenting i'm still trying to get the hang of everything here. - IEWF

pairing: dbf!Joel x fem!reader

trope: Mom's Boyfriend! Javier Pena

summary: After some great news you're in the best mood when your Mom's boyfriend Javier comes over. What's the harm in a little fun with him while she's not there?

warnings: age gap (not specified), sexual tension, forbidden rel, absolutely filthy talk, daddy mentioned, other shit but I've probs forgotten.

word count: 2.5k

rating 18+

wanna see my other stuff?

The email comes through while you’re in the living room, watching television. A bleep on your phone as you swipe up, opening gmail.

Congratulations, we’d like to offer you the position of-

You don’t read further, you just jump off the couch and pump your fist in the air.

“FUCK YEA!”

The promotion came through on your job which means starting next month you'll officially have enough to move out of your alcoholic mom's shitty apartment. She's one of those talented ones that still has a job, is still likeable, but can't get through her evening without a tallboy or seven. 

A knock sounds at the door while you compose the text to your friends quickly, nearly vibrating with excitement. You’re so close to what you’ve always wanted. A knock sounds at the door as

you rack your mind trying to think of all the people that could be stopping by.

You creep towards the door, peering into the peephole to see a tired looking Javier Peña smoking and standing there. 

Javier is your mom's new boyfriend and drinking buddy. He just moved into the apartment next door and your mother wasted no time getting to know him. She's always had a thing for inscrutable men. 

You're perfectly cordial to the parade of men that come through the front door of you home, and have since your father left for Punta Cana with his secretary five years ago. 

Javier is perfectly nice; he's just one of many in a long line of your mother's bed partners. You don't get too attached. 

"Hi Javier," you offer, opening the door a little wider. "What's up?" 

"Came by to see your mama," Javier says glancing at his watch. "She said she'd be home by now."

Normally you'd tell him he was mistaken so he'll fuck off. But after the great day you had you're in an impossibly good mood. You step back to open the door with a polite smile. 

"Sometimes she works overtime," you explain. "She should be home soon though. You wanna come in and wait?"

Javier debates this and then finally nods, flicking his cigarette off into the night before moving inside. He follows after you. You swan through the room, picking up your pizza plate and glancing at him over your shoulder. 

"Want a beer?"

"Sure."

You're giddy with everything that happened today. Excited with the thought of moving somewhere new, somewhere bright and fresh. This puts you in high spirits as you grab you both a bottle of Corona and head back. 

Javier takes a place on the couch, watching what you'd been enjoying in the background. 

"You watch black and white movies?"

"Sometimes," you shrug when you come back with two sweating beer bottles. You hand him his and take a seat next to him on the couch. 

The couch isn't huge so your thighs are touching his as you take a sip from your beer bottle. He doesn't move away, doesn't move closer, just sits there politely staring ahead. 

"Never seen this movie," Javier comments, clearing his throat. "S'that Joan Crawford?"

"Yep. It's called Mildred Pierce. It's an old classic film noir," you offer, fingers itching to grab the remote.

You watch Javier's lean throat bobs as he drinks his beer. You take a slow sip of yours, never crazy about the taste, only the buzz it brings. Unlike your mom you’re done after two beers.

"I think I saw the Kate Winslet one," he offers. "Remake I guess."

"Mhm." 

You see his dark gaze flicks to you out the corner of his eyes, sliding over your bare legs before jerking back to the television. When you shift and he does it a second time you realize he's checking you out. 

You should be repulsed or even horrified. But instead you're amused, even tingly at the prospect that this man finds you attractive. He's certainly easy on the eyes in his short sleeve button down and pouty mouth. Is he mewing? A quick glance tells you his jeans are tight and that even flaccid his cock is big. 

You have no desire to seduce your mother's boyfriend. The thought is reprehensible, but the flattery of being found desirable by an older, attractive man is a heady drug. 

You stretch yourself out, raising your arms above your head and giving a dramatic groan. A sliver of your belly shows and you see through your hair as Javier takes another peek at your body before shuffling slightly. 

"You, uh, like old movies?" 

"I've always had a love of older things," you purr. 

Javier is silent at that, his fingers tightening around his beer bottle. You can sense that he's uncomfortable and it amuses you greatly. 

Are he and your mom an established couple? Is this serious? You have noticed him around lately but that's your mother's way of things. Burn through them fast. Besides you're not going to be here in a month. 

What's the harm in a little fun? 

You hide a smirk and rise up. With a measured agility you lean towards the coffee table, gripping his knee to help propel you forward. You reach with your other hand to grab the remote. You feel when your shorts ride up, exposing most of your ass. You sense Javier's eyes on you and you make sure to arch, letting him get a good long view, squeezing his knee when you lean back against the cushion. You notice his cheeks are pink. 

This is too fun. 

"I always thought it was so sexy," you explain patiently, raising the remote to turn up the volume. 

"If I recall it doesn't end very sexy for them," Javier swallows. He's refusing to look in your direction. 

"Yeah but the buildup is the best part," you murmur. "All that sexual tension, knowing you wanna fuck but knowing it's so wrong?"

You see the moment the words hit him because Javier goes as still as a statue. He's barely breathing, not moving a fraction and you wonder if he's trying to focus on not getting hard. 

You hold back a giggle at the thought and lean towards him, your mouth drawing near to his ear. 

"You ever wanted to fuck someone knowing its wrong, Javi?"

Javier says nothing, but you don't miss the dart of his eyes to your chest and then back to the television. Your hand goes to his thigh, fingertips inching upwards. Javier's eyes immediately fly to your fingers and their lazy ascent up his thigh. You bite your lower lip to keep the grin from bleeding over your face. You're not going any further than this; you've had your fun. 

You pull your hand from his leg, placing it in your lap. Javier lifts his eyes up the length of your body before locking his gaze with yours. He raises a hand to the back of the couch, nostrils flaring.

Shit.

Can he smell your arousal? Can he hear the sudden tick of your pulse? Can he sense the shift that just occurred?

He licks his lower lip slowly, his large eyes glued to your mouth. Your lips part as your breathing deepens.

Fuck has he always been this sexy?

Javier’s eyes are black with arousal, shining with lust and you feel your core tighten at how he’s staring at you; like he’s an animal waiting to devour prey. You shouldn’t be turned on by that. You shouldn’t want him to close the distance between your bodies.

Tension crackles in the air and the scent of his aftershave wafts in the air around you. It’s spicy and sweet and mingles with the scent of cigarette smoke. You can physically feel your arousal soaking your panties.

“Javier---“

He doesn’t look like he heard you; he’s too intent on staring at your mouth, deaf to everything else. If he’s anything like you, the blood is rushing in his ears.  You squirm. Javier begins to slide towards you on the couch, his body moving with a feline grace.

The both of you hear the key hit the apartment lock at the same time. Javier jerks back from you just in time for the door to swing open and your mother to come blowing in. 

"I'm home!" 

Your mother's voice breaks into the room and you see Javier's face break into a guilty looking smile. 

"Hey gorgeous." 

"I'm so sorry I'm late Javi!" Your mother pouts, coming to throw herself into his lap. She wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him into a kiss as you hold in a gag. 

"I hope my daughter was hospitable to you while I was gone." 

She gives a wink in your direction that you return with a polite smile. Javier grips your mom around the middle, holding her there in his lap and refusing to look in your direction. 

"Yep," he nods. "Very. Got me a beer and everything." 

"That's my girl," your mom says with a proud smile. 

You're about to reply when you think of the text you haven't sent. Of your promotion. Your game with Javier is done. You press a kiss to your mom's temple and bid them both a goodnight before heading to your bedroom with your Corona.

You pull on your pyjamas, tired from the day. It's warm tonight, so a light tank and sleep shorts will have to do. You pull out your phone, sending off a few texts to your friends to tell them about the good news.

We gotta go out to celebrate sluuuuutttt

You smile at the message from your oldest friend Harper. The one who loves to party more than anyone you know.

There's a knock on your bedroom door an hour or so later and you open it, surprised to see Javier standing there looking nervous. He scans your body clocking the short shorts and the way your nipples peek through your shirt. 

"Your mom's just in the shower," Javier tells you quietly, taking a step back. "Then we're going out to dinner." 

You can hear the shower running down at the end of the hall.

"Mhm," you nod, distracted by your phone on the bed that just beeped. 

"You eat yet?"

"Nah, didn't feel hungry," you offer. "Where you guys going?"

"Dunno. Maybe that Mexican place down the street." 

The two of you lapse into uncomfortable silence, you balancing on one foot as you watch him avoid your eyes. You bite back amusement when his dark eyes dart to your chest and then back to the floor.  

"You want us to bring you anything back?"

There's a sweetness in him asking if you want anything. Something that almost feels paternal. But the way he keeps sneaking looks at your tits is anything but. 

The shower is still going and emboldened by the buzz from your beer you take a step towards Javier in the hallway. He stands watching you, chest rising shallowly as you press your front to his, standing on your tiptoes. 

"You don't have to take care of me," you purr at his ear. "'I don't need you to be my daddy." 

You feel rather than hear the shudder that goes through him at the term and you hold in a laugh. You hand finds his bicep, squeezing there and you ensure your voice is a seductive whisper when you speak next. 

"Unless, you wanna be my daddy, Javi. Is that it? Or do you just want me to call you daddy?" 

He swallows and you step back, biting your lower lip. Javier looks like he's run a marathon. Pupils blown wide, lips slightly parted, neck growing damp with sweat. The shower squeaks off and like a whistle he seems to come back to himself.  Javier steps back as you move backwards into your bedroom. 

"Have a good dinner," you tell him with a wink. 

And before he can say anything you've stepped back, closing the door gently in his face. 

You muffle your laughter with your pillow, listening to hear Javier standing outside your room a moment longer before his footsteps recede into the other bedroom.

You hear he and your mother chatting, mumbles through the thin walls and you bring up your phone to see what the alert was.

There’s this guy here at the club u neeed to fuck. He’s so criminally fine.

Attached is a photo of the most aggressively mid man you’ve ever seen. Just Harper being Harper.

It’s Tuesday Harper.

So what? Fucking doesn’t happen during the week?

Not for me. My job just got harder remember!?

You can almost see your friend rolling her eyes.

Have fun being a boring ass nun. c u on the weekend. Imma get you shitfaced n help you celebrate your promotion properly.

You write back something sarcastic before you give a yawn and crawl under your covers. You set the alarm on your phone before you start the classic evening tradition of wasting good sleeping time on tiktok. You scroll on your feed for a bit, feeling your eyelids grow heavy when a noise draws your attention. 

It takes you a moment before you realize it's the clack of your mother's metal bed frame hitting the wall across the hall.  

"Fuck yes, Javi!"

Classic Mom shit. Whenever she drinks she's loud and hyper sexual. But you thought they were going for dinner? You hear your mother cooing his name again, her begging in a pathetic whine that grates your nerves. You reach for your headphones when something stops you. 

"Fucking tease." 

You think you've misheard because instead of your mother's theatrical moans you hear his rasping baritone. Punched out groans at first, slowly building with every thrust. 

"Fucking tease acting like that."

You think you're imagining it at first. He's never been vocal before - only grunting and moaning. He's never spoken like this in the bedroom and that alone has you fascinated. 

"Take it, yeah, take it you fucking slut."

And in between these rasped epithets you hear your mother's groans, her encouragement and then her gentle begs for him to go harder.

"You're messing with the wrong man you little whore," he huffs, his hips slapping against her ass. "Think you can fuck with me and get away with it?"

Your mother's moans are muffled, likely because her face is smooshed in her pillow. He's undoubtedly fucking her from behind, facing the wall, facing your bedroom. 

"You're gonna pay for it."

And then as the groan of the mattress and the creak of the bed frame hit a fever pitch you hear Javier, his voice a tight hiss. 

"Daddy's gonna wreck that tight little cunt. Gonna fuck you so full of my cum you cry for me to stop. Gonna show you w-"

The thought remains forever unfinished because you hear the telltale groan of completion, your mother's high pitched whinnies, the noisy concert of smacks and wet plunging and then finally silence. 

You know that wasn't for your mother's benefit. He wasn't saying it about her. He was saying it about you. 

The thought has your pussy pounding. You thrust your hand down you panties only to find you're so wet you can barely believe it. 

It's only seconds before you bring yourself off to the filth Javier just spewed before trembling violently under the covers. Images of his mouth on your cunt and his cock fucking into you have you shuddering as another orgasm overtakes the first, leaving you wrung out and panting as you realize: you are so fucked.

[vaguely-concerned]

...the 'almond room' thing in the unwanted guest IS a reference to/play on words on amygdala, right? (amygdala comes from the greek word for almond!) I didn't read that wrong? it is stupid sexy Ianthe coyly inviting Palamedes into a different chamber of her brain, as it were?

(also the pieces of meat -- the feeding or kissing, it's hard to say which of it all -- being present right from the beginning... ianthe DOES know exactly what has happened to her, doesn't she. palamedes is just cutting his way through her layers of denial and repression all merciless and scalpel-like to get her to admit it. or, she knows subconsciously at least -- each person comes in and feeds her something that she's helpless to stop from becoming a part of her even in her coffin, with bloody kisses. oh baby love is feeding me bad meat and I have no choice but to swallow it down. like yeah I suspect that is how human contact can feel when your sense of self and boundaries developed to be a specific kind of Fucked Up lol. that shit could make a person dream of being a diamond in a glass of wine; perfect, inviolable, untouchable, eternally separate and safe. In the words of Andrea Gibson in Prism:

They say the womb is where we learn love is knowing the cord that feeds you could at any moment wrap around your neck

that is quite literally ianthe's first introduction to love -- her sister, a cord around her neck. Corona is Ianthe's other self, a second soul running around outside of her body, and she seems to consider herself as responsible for (and entitled to) the preservation of Corona's soul as her own. the way this mirrors that growing up, Ianthe had to be two necromancers in one body to let them stay together. (twins and ghosts all the way down I guess.) she's still just trying to do the same thing, I think, she's simply put on some bigger boots about it. the central problem of lyctorhood, self vs. connection/love, rears its head once again -- Ianthe existentially wants total self-contained self-sufficiency, perfect control, sovereign sway and masterdom over her soul... but she wants that at the same time as being in uninterrupted (uninterruptible!), eternal and indelible intimacy with her sister, whose soul also cannot be allowed to change. which, you know. freedom and love don't coexist the way you want them to, Ianthe, no matter how clever you are there won't be a way to get what you want. (especially not with a sister whose idea of what love is seems to go more towards being consumed, made one, by whatever violence necessary -- 'she could have taken me'.) man. Ianthe is a spectacular and ongoing piece of work, but sometimes it's hard to see how she could ever have turned out otherwise considering the conditions she was born and raised under haha.

the two-way street of the horror of digestion, whether you're the devourer or the devouree. part of you in me, part of me in you, whether either of us likes it or not we're both changed by this. bad news: you can't get out of interconnectedness by finding the cleverest loophole around it, ianthe. nice try, though)

[katakaluptastrophy]

So we all know how Ianthe became a Lyctor for “ultimate power—and posters of [her] face.”

And I'm sure someone made a nice icon.

But you know who would have definitely gotten a poster of their face? Coronabeth.

Think about it: every House but the Ninth has lost a scion. In a culture that thrives on melodrama and the conspicuous consumption of death, there is a wave of hysterical funerary fervour to mourn their lost leaders. And the Third - the House of glitz, trendsetting, and political intrigue - has lost its beloved Crown Princess.

We don't know a huge amount about funerals in the Nine Houses, but we do know a bit about Third House funerals:

The front coffin is distinguished from its fellows by its gorgeous arrangement of flowers and wreaths. The flowers are all in hues of gold or violet, and are fake. The coffin is hinged open at the front, with its contents hidden from view by the flowers. A tray of meat is rested on the closed bottom half of the coffin. A queue of gaudily masked mourners process past the coffin, slowly, each one taking a strip of meat, then stopping by the head to lean within—kissing or feeding; we can’t be sure. - TUG

Apparently, a Third House funeral - unsurprisingly for flesh magicians - focuses on the physical. The reverence of/fear of/(lust for?) the body. A wake on steroids. But they received no body for Coronabeth. So I can only imagine larger than life posters of Corona decked with flowers, the weeping crowds surging through the streets of Ida, etc etc... Poor Ianthe, second place once again to a 'corpse'.

Moving past Ianthe to House funerary customs in general, and to the awful aftermath of the Lyctor trials in particular, it seems especially unfair that neither of the flesh magic Houses got a body back to mourn. Obviously Corona wasn't actually dead, but for those who believed her to be, the lack of a body for such visceral funerary rights must have been traumatic.

We don't have as many details of Seventh funerals, but the House famous for it's "beguiling corpses" likely also focuses much of its post-mortem ritual around the body. Dulcie suggests that the deceased might even leave specific instructions in their will about the appearance of their corpse:

That drawing looked nothing like me. I loved it. You don’t know this so it doesn’t help, but I included it in my will and put down that I wanted to look like that after I died. I thought maybe it would give you a laugh at the funeral, you know? - TUG

Meanwhile, the Fourth, Fifth, and Eighth receive their perfect pairs of "statuesque and incorruptible" bodies, preserved beyond the wildest dreams of the Seventh. These Houses are all spirit magicians. The Fourth, for whom thanergetically detonating oneself on a battlefield far from the rays of Dominicus isn't unheard of, almost certainly have funerary rites that don't presuppose a body. And the Fifth, whose necromantic practice is far more concerned with the spirit than the body, likely centre their most significant funerary rites around the ghost.

Y'know, the bit they don't have? Just as the flesh magicians of the Third and Seventh would have been unable to mourn their lost scions with rites around the body, the Fifth would have been unable to call their ghosts, trapped in Harrow's River bubble.

So amidst all the grief and awfulness, and the Emperor refusing to answer any questions about what happened (why are they all dead? Why are so many bodies missing? Where are the ghosts? Why are the bodies so creepily perfect?), half the Houses can't even mourn their dead in the way they normally would.

[evilweasel]

Locked Tomb Necro-Cav Dynamics

I'm probably either reaching or stating something really obvious, but - if the necro/cavalier partnership is supposed to be a metaphor for marriage under patriarchy (in being that it was created by a guy who seemed to have taken bullet points from the previous society and its power dynamics, in which one party holds all the power and the other is supposed to submit and serve blindly), then a lot of the necro/cav pairings we see in Canaan House reflect a lot of marriage tropes from Earth.

Judith and Marta

They seem to reflect a "stereotypical" necro-cavaliership, akin to a stereotypical marriage. Judith and Marta appear to have known each other in school ("I have studied energy transferral aptitude with Lt. Dyas since our school days." [GtN: P.456]) and were sworn to each other not long after school , not dissimilar to how a lot of very "traditional" marriages begin in high school and are quickly consummated after. They are also very professional and close with each other, and through Cohort military training are the pinnacle of everything a necro and cav should be, even down to Judith having to watch her cavalier die for her lol.

Ianthe, Coronabeth, and Naberius

Necro-cavalier bonds are typically partnerships, HOWEVER in this case Ianthe makes a third, and so she and her twin have to share a cavalier, which is very much frowned upon. My initial thought is this is a metaphor for polyamory, despite Ianthe and Corona being twins. But also them being twins hasn't stopped them from being very... attached to each other, to the point where several characters in the novels make references to their incestous-bordering relationship. (Palamedes comments about it to Nona I can't find the exact quote rn it's very late). So maybe it's not that far fetched.

Isaac and Jeannemary

The "arranged child marriage" trope, as they are the youngest necro/cav pair, having been sworn to each other at age 9/10, and Jeannemary being modelled into Isaac's cavalier from birth ("Intended to be Isaac's cavalier from birth, swore the oath with him and gained the title at age nine." [GtN: P. 460]). This is not unlike a lot of marriages between throughout the ages as families betrothe their young/unborn to strengthen ties and forge alliances.

Magnus and Abigail

Magnus and Abigail are a weird one again, because I'm saying the necro/cav relationship are a metaphor for marriage, and yet Abigail and Magnus, who ARE married, are reviled for it. The metaphor isn't perfect, and I'm willing to be wrong about this. Honestly just read this post by @katakaluptastrophy because honestly it was this that got me thinking in the first place.

Silas and Colum

Silas and Colum are a play on many marriages being incestuous; it's not unheard of for medieval marriages to be between uncles and nieces or aunts and nephews, especially to keep blood purity in noble families, which is very much a mindset of the Eighth and their need to "breed batteries". (Source)

Harrowhark and Gideon

Honestly, for these two I'm... not sure which part would be the metaphor. The sham nature of their necro/cav partnership? The power dynamics of an indentured servant being boosted up to the partner of a figurehead? All of it?

And from here I can't think of other marriage tropes that fit the others. The two left are the Sixth and Seventh but as we don't know anything about the relationship between Dulcinea and Protesilaus (since both are a bit... out the picture during GtN), it's hard to comment on. Unless, that's the commentry? Cam and Pal also don't fit anything that immediately comes to mind, apart from maybe mild incest again? But then, we have the Eighth to fit that trope already,,,

Let me know if you think this idea has any merit!! It's 4am, I'm tired, and I'll go back and fix sourcing issues at another point lol.

[colins-bridgerton]

penelope & colin playlist

a year ago by james arthur

i wish it was a year ago i wish that i could hold you close now i'm driving past your house, i know the lights are on, you're not alone i wonder if you're making eyes i wonder if he loves you like the way you said that only i could do i wish that i could tell you that I miss you

ghost of you by seconds of summer

too young, too dumb to know things like love too young, too dumb to I drown it out like I always do dancing through our house with the ghost of you and i chase it down with a shot of truth that my feet don't dance like they did with you

far away by nickleback

i wanted you to stay 'cause i needed i need to hear you say that i love you i loved you all along and I forgive you for being away for far too long so keep breathing 'cause i'm not leaving you anymore believe it hold on to me, and never let me go

oceans by seafret

it feels like there's oceans between you and me once again we hide our emotions Under the surface and try to pretend but it feels like there's oceans between you and me i want you i want you and i always will it feels like there's oceans between you and me

give me a minute by the coronas

and i can't remember how we got so wrapped up in it hold on i'm not finished just give me a minute i'm not finished and if you don't mind i can live with it just a minute i'm not finished would you be so kind just to forgive it

can i be him by james arthur

i heard there was someone but i know he don't deserve you if you were mine i'd never let anyone hurt you no no I wanna dry those tears, kiss those lips It's all that I've been thinking about 'cause a light came on when i heard that song and i want you to sing it again i swear that every word you sing you wrote them for me like it was a private show

before by ulrik munther

before we burn each other up before we lose our minds before i'm not enough for you baby I need some time before you break my heart oh before we need to talk before it even starts i mean i'm sorry i didn't call

you're loosing me by taylor swift

how long could we be a sad song 'til we were too far gone to bring back to life? i gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy and all i did was bleed as i tried to be the bravest soldier fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me i'm the best thing at this party (you're losin' me) andi wouldn't marry me either a pathological people pleaser who only wanted you to see her and i'm fadin', thinkin' "do something, babe, say something" (say something) "lose something, babe, risk something" (you're losin' me) "choose something, babe, i got nothing" (i got nothing) "to believe, unless you're choosin' me"

deep end by birdy

i don't know if you mean everything to me and I wonder, can i give you what you need? don't want to find i've lost it all too scared to have no one to call so can we just pretend that we're not falling into the deep end?

love me or leave me by little mix

and love me baby please cause i could still be the only one you need the only one close enough to feel you breathe yeah I could still be that place where you run Instead of the one that you're running from, ooh you, can take this heart heal it or break it all apart no, this isn't fair love me or leave me here

cross your mind by calum scott

tell me, do i ever cross your mind? do i ever keep you up at night? thinking 'bout what coulda been if we did it all again i've been trying to keep an open door even though you've got the locks on yours tell me even after all of this time do i ever cross your mind like you cross mine? do i?

wrong direction by hailee steinfeld

loved me with your worst intentions didn't even stop to question every time you burned me down don't know how; for a moment it felt like heaven loved me with your worst intentions painted us a happy ending every time you burned me down don't know how; for a moment it felt like heaven and it's so gut-wrenchin' fallin' in the wrong direction

loves you like i coudn't do by dunacan laurence

i hope you find that someone who'll love you and it feels like all that you wanted thought it would last if we just kept running we played our hand, now we're left with nothing hope you find that someone who'll hold you In a way that i always wanted to a hundred shots, but we kept on missing there's no regrets, 'cause we tried, my love I hope you find that someone who loves you like i couldn't do

a little bit yours by jp saxe

you found someone new, before me and you didn't try nearly as hard and maybe that's the problem i don't know how to take it away from you without giving someone else my heart all I do Is get over you and i'm still so bad at it i let myself want you i let myself try i let myself fall back into your eyes i let myself want you i let myself hope i let myself feel things i know that you don't you're not mine anymore but I'm still a little bit yours

[raayllum]

this isn't how i'm writing it in fanon s6 bc i can pace things however i want with zero time constraints but this is something i could see s6 doing + i like being self indulgent so

They'd been stupid to trust the Celestial Elves.

It was the only thought running through Callum's brain as he stared in horror, the corona sealed back glass, the Nova Blade a weapon no mortal could wield, and Rayla—

On her knees, the leader holding an ordinary but no less terrifying blade to her throat, his face still a bit scraped up from his and Rayla's earlier scuffle. She'd been the one to catch the elf reaching for Callum's bag when they slept that night; she'd be the one to draw her sword first and engage him, quickly overwhelmed by the time Callum and her parents had arrived.

They were all talented warriors, but rusty after two years in a coin—Runaan unable to draw his bow with only one arm, and something long range was needed here. Some way to kill the leader and give Rayla time, even if he held her in a vice grip, pressing down hard enough on her throat there was thin, scarlet line growing.

"You have something we need, boy," the leader hissed, breathing heavily through a broken nose. "You know what it is."

Runaan's voice broke through, sharp and demanding—"What is he talking about?"—but Callum couldn't tear his eyes away from Rayla. She was struggling to breathe, let alone speak, but gave her head the barest shake. No.

"What are you going to do with it?" Callum says as neutrally as he can, stalling (there has to be a spell or a way out of this) even if he already knows the answer.

What else could they hope to do with something called the Key of Aaravos?

"I'll tell you what we're going to do your elf girl unless you give it so us," the Celestial elf snarls. "On the count of three, I'll slit her throat. One—"

"Stop!"

Two hadn't even left his lips, Callum having an excuse to look away from Rayla's glaring, tearshot eyes now as he digs the cube out of his bag. It feels like it weighs a thousand pounds as he holds it up.

On Finnegrin's ship, at least he'd been able to hide what he was doing—what he was willing to do—in the shadowy depths of the ship. Here, in the light, there's nowhere to hide.

Callum holds it out, taking a few steps closer. "Lower the sword first," he says.

"And have her wriggle free? I don't think so."

"Callum," she wheezes. "Don't—"

"Fine then," Callum snaps. "At the same time—an exchange. On my count of three. One—" He looses his grip on the cube, the ring of celestial elves watching eagerly. "Two—" It's not ideal, him and Rayla in front of where any of her parents could join the fray; there will have to be distance before anyone can fight either way. But then, he's not doing this out of the certainty he'll get the Key back, that it won't end in disaster.

Just for her safety. Just for himself, because he can't live without her.

This was his destiny, what Aaravos was banking on. And he was right.

"Three!"

The Celestial elf takes his blade away and shoves her forward at the same time Callum tosses the cube over. It's caught in one shiny blue hand, the elf towering over him as Callum slides to his knees, catching Rayla as she careens forward before she can hit the floor. She coughs weakly in his arms, bleeding at the throat, but it seems shallow.

The celestial elves make it maybe five five away with their prize before her parents leap into action, swords clashing, but Callum grabs his staff and constructs a funnel of wind around him and Rayla, a thick enough wall of air to keep anyone else out momentarily, as he helps her sit up.

"Callum." She's crying, but alive.

"Let me look at you," he murmurs, lifting up her chin. He uses his scarf to wipe away the blood, relieved when more doesn't follow. A shallow cut just to scare him, but it'd worked. He pulls her into his arms next, just needing a moment to feel her heart beating against his.

She takes a second to hold him back and then does so, tightly, and his heart settles as they sit there shaking. She hasn't forgiven him for it yet, maybe—but she will.

[paintbrushnebula]

Have you ever thought about making a Ghostflower Tangled AU? Because I can't stop thinking about Miles with 70 feet of blonde dreads, and Gwen's failed smolder and begrudgingly guiding Miles to see the lanterns. It just works so well in my brain.

Hi! YOU! YES YOU! You've got my number! Because I LIVE for Ghostflower x New Dream. Gosh, I live for Spider-Verse x Tangled, period! I've had it rotating in my brain for about a year now, although I guess I've never really talked at length about it or shared any of my ideas for a proper Spider-Verse x Tangled AU, have I?

I was a little embarrassed before, if I'm being honest 😅. But if y'all wanna indulge me, THEN HYYYES IMMA WAX POETICALLY ABOUT THIS AU TILL THE END OF TIME AND SPACE.

Rapunzel - Miles Morales Eugene Fitzherbert/Flynn Rider - Gwen Stacy/Ghost Spider Mother Gothel - Olivia Octavius Captain of the Guard - George Stacy King Frederic - Jeff Morales/King Jefferson Queen Arianna - Rio Morales/Queen Rio The Stabbington Brothers - Tombstone and Ben Reilly/Scarlet Spider Maximus - Widow (Web-Slinger’s horse) The Snuggly Duckling Pub Thugs - The Sinister Six (they’re soft-confirmed to appear in Beyond the Spider-Verse after all) Pascal - isn’t in this AU.

So the overall plot of Tangled remains relatively the same, with the cast of Spider-Verse implemented into it, of course.

18 years ago, King Jefferson used the sundrop flower to heal the dying pregnant Queen Rio of Corona. Prince Miles is born with golden, ultra kinky 4c hair and magical healing powers, gets kidnapped by Mother Olivia, locked away in a tower deep in the woods, the whole shebang.

Now, Gwen Stacy is the secret identity of masked legendary thief Ghost Spider, currently a respected, high-ranking member of the Spider Society, a crime syndicate run by The Kingpin in the neighboring kingdom of Vardaros, the most powerful in the Seven Kingdoms due to its members' all wearing masks that hide their faces, rendering their identities completely unknown to anyone and impossible for any law enforcement to track them down. Recently, Ghost Spider has been commissioned by The Kingpin to steal the Lost Prince of Corona's crown from the palace.

So Ghost Spider has been on the run for years from the Captain of the Coronan Guard, Captain George Stacy, her father, who has no idea the masked thief he's hunting is his own daughter.

And don’t think I haven’t thought about the TV series exclusive characters!

Cassandra - Lyla (you have no idea how happy I was when I came up with that) Lance Strongbow - Hobie Brown/Rebel Spider Kiera and Catalina - Peni Parker and Margo Kess (they’re not kids in this though) Uncle Monty - Aunt May Varian - Miles G. Quirin - Aaron Davis Adira - Jessica Drew Hector - Miguel O’Hara The Baron - Kingpin (obv) Anthony the Weasel - Web-Slinger Baron’s Henchmen - Spider Society Lord Demanitus - Peter B. Parker King Edmund - Spider-Noir/King Benjamin Hamuel - Spider-Ham/Hamuel (he’s not called “Spider-Ham” ofc but he is still a talking anthropomorphic pig in this) Zhan Tiri - The Spot

Your concepts about Miles with golden dreads, Gwen's smolder, her taking him to see the LANTERNS OOHHHHHHH yeah imma just have to draw all that, sorry. Talking about it aint enough. Expect a buncha Tangled x Spiderverse fanart to be flooding my blog soon XD

[salemthepuppylover]

Mommy I can't stop shaking thinking about giving you head to serve you, eating your ass with slow licks, tonguing your taint while I huff your scent, lapping at your balls and putting them in my mouth. I wanna moan around them and suck on them, help you make a big load to breed my boycunt with. I wanna lick and kiss up your shaft as it gets harder until I can bounce my tight warm mouth over your head and corona guided by your hand in my hair. I'd beg you to breed me just after, I'm ovulating and I need you to fill me up so bad. But my hole is so wet and my tdick is hard and red and throbbing, ready to be dominated by your tongue. Would you make me cum before I'm allowed to be filled, make my hole and cock yours with your mouth? I'd be much tighter for you if you did, and if you made me cum for you more than once it'd be almost impossible to pull out no matter how slick my hole got from your oral affection. Mommy could you show me how good it feels to be eaten that way so I can be the best breeding toy you could want ? 🐑

awww, such a needy little lamb.

you need to make mommy feel good before you do, huh? your only purpose is to make sure I have everything I want, isn’t it, darling? you’d be such a perfect pet, lapping at my hole and kissing up my balls. I’d be so loud, bucking back into your mouth, holding you down when you finally take my girlcock into your mouth. it’d twitch and throb, leaking profusely in your mouth. if you pull off before I cum, and ask me to eat you out, I don’t think I could stop.

I couldn’t help myself, I’d have to hold you down and eat your boypussy. my tongue would flick and rub all over your tdick, sucking you into my mouth while you buck and clench around mommy’s tongue <33

your boycunt would be so thoroughly used by the end of the night, my cum dripping out of you. my cock would be hard constantly, just begging to be inside your tight, warm hole.

[apostleofgreed]

It's here, the finale - my friends thoughts throughout Nona the Ninth (it's a long one)

Right which one of these idiots is stuck in Nona's body

Signs point to both

I think more likely Harrow and shes just removed the massive stick up her ass

Most other signs thus far do point to Gideon though- lack of aforementioned stick, finds herself attractive, loves ass jokes, wants to pet dogs (Harrow seems like a don't work with animals or children type)

Also these other kids have names like they're gonna be running in the fucking grand national

Honestly what the fuck is going on with child conception in this series???

Someone has five dads, God was asking if Harrow and Ianthe were being 'safe' sexually and I'm just confused

Okay so I've only listened to half an hour today but if Crown isn't coronabeth I will eat my own arm

My theory is that neither of them are in Harrow's body and that she's being possessed by The Body

Maybe I should follow in Harrow's footsteps and ask you to fucking lobotomize me

No beta we die like Babs

"what do you think is sexy?" "Eating breakfast" Me too, Camilla, me too

Maybe someone needs to lobotomize Judith, has anyone thought of that?

Thing is I feel like I'm supposed to think John is really bad and is the villain here but I just don't

The worst thing he's done is lie to his friends for a few thousand years

Finally, the baddest bitch in all the nine houses (it's Ianthe)

What a power move honestly first she steals Babs' soul now she steals his body, absolutely inspired

She could literally kill another 200 babies to resurrect Harrow and I'd be like what a babe 😍 at this point

I'm bored of shooting can we go back to swords and doing weird things with your body please

I just think it would be great if Harrow could hop back into her body and have a full meltdown about how to function in this world

Erm Corona darling can you please try to stop them bombing your sister in the body of one of your lifelong pals pls and thanks

Y'all better sTOp

Fucking marry, kill, reanimate I can't hahahaha

"that's not actually crown's boyfriend Nona, it's her sister but I don't think anyone could blame you for getting confused" Fair hahahahah so very true

Don't know how they think this is gonna work seeing as though Harrow and Ianthe literally lived together for like over a year and had an interpersonal relationship but ok

Maybe it's because pash has the accent of a rudeboy from Oldham and suffer is weirdly French (on disliking We Suffer and Pash)

Palamades in Ianthe in Babs is sending me west

Abigail died too soon and really she did all the legwork in Harrow

Can't help but feel all of this drama could have been avoided if Harry had just done the job properly in the first place and just let Gideon die properly

All of this just because an 18 year old gave herself the brain scramblies

Cam has just burst into fire wtf

Can't believe Crux hasn't dropped dead tbh

I've got less than an hour left I feel like we're cutting it fine to get Harry back in her body here

Big flex to be waiting for everyone to arrive smoking a ciggie with your golden skeleton arm

Fucking friendship bracelets and a secret handshake hahahahah

Gideon needs to stop being such a bloody himbo

Who has shouted "get in line thou big slut!" Hahahahah

There we have it, the full series. Hope y'all have enjoyed this.

[paradoxcase]

Gideon the Ninth audiobook, through to the end of Chapter 31

Cytherea is described as having "biscuit-colored curls" which I kind passed over the first time I was reading. She's described elsewhere as having light brown hair; American biscuits aren't any kind of brown, if they're made right, but Muir isn't American, either. In Britain, it's my understanding that "biscuit" refers to any hard flat cookie with a stamped design, but those come in all sorts of colors. Does "biscuit" mean a secret third thing in New Zealand?

Gideon says "it's stupid for a cavalier to watch their necromancer die" which I think sort of foreshadows Gideon rejecting Harrow's instruction to survive her

Gideon asks Cytherea why she came to Canaan House in the first place, and I feel like Cytherea's answer is about when she came the first time, nearly 10,000 years ago? She talks about how the Seventh wanted her to die beautifully and she though the Emperor had her best interests more at heart than they did

She says: "If they could figure out how to stop you when you're mostly cancer and just a little bit woman, they would" about the Seventh, but that's exactly what John did to her, isn't it?

And then: "I'll probably live forever, worse luck, whatever happened to One Flesh, One End?"

Palamedes pronounces "golem" exactly like "Gollum" and that amuses me

Harrow thought the secret to Lyctorhood was a secret power source in Canaan House they were supposed to discover - I guess to the extent that the consumed cavalier's soul is a power source, she wasn't exactly wrong

Camilla: "The last thing the Warden needs is an introduction to Lady Septimus" - pretty funny in retrospect

Palamedes after Harrow removes the plug Cytherea put on the Seventh lab's keyhole: "Did you hide the last key, too?" He was right about that

Colum is described as having a "perpetually scratchy voice" which I missed the first time, but it does match up with his voice here

Mayonnaise Uncle thinks Gideon's red hair might have come from the Third, which is I guess some extra information about the distribution of phenotypes in the Empire, but the only other redheaded House character we know of is G1deon (I almost wrote "Pyrrha") (who, ironically, is not biologically related to Gideon Nav unless he was like John's cousin or something). Mercy had "pink" hair, but I don't know if that means like, strawberry blond, or like, literally dyed pink. I guess it's been 10,000 years, so things might be a bit different now

Colum: "The next time we meet, I think it's likely one of us will die." Well, it wasn't the next time they met, since they both showed up to hear Cytherea tell a very fake story about why Protesilaus was already dead just after this, but I think it's the next time they are both in the same room together than Colum dies, so, yeah

Teacher says something about a "poor child" and Gideon doesn't know who he's referring to and I don't either even on the second readthrough. I guess it's possible that he's just talking nonsense, because he's a weird construct, but he's been saying things that consistently make sense in the current context throughout the whole book, so I don't really buy that

The scene where Corona is practicing with a sword and challenging Gideon to a duel feels kind of like she's anticipating being left behind by Ianthe and is trying to lean into the idea of becoming a cavalier after this, since she can't pretend to be a necromancer without Ianthe. We know from the Fourth teens that Ianthe has been sneaking into all the locked doors and reading the theorems at this point

When Naberius comes to collect her, he says "I won't tell her". I guess he means Ianthe?

Is that really how "beatified" is pronounced? I don't think I've ever heard it spoken before. Wiktionary seems to agree that it is

If I had listened to the audiobook first, I definitely would have misheard Gideon talking about "narking" on Harrow as "knocking" and been confused

Palamedes: "All I ask is that you put some pen and flimsy in my cell so I can start my memoirs." Yeah, that's not what you wrote when you were actually confined to the River bubble for months, haha

Narration: Suddenly [Cytherea] seemed impossibly old.

Cytherea claims that John was against soul siphoning. So, the thalergy siphoning that was a fundamental part of Mercy's challenge, and which the Second House uses regularly on enemies, is totally fine and cool, but Mayonnaise Uncle send Colum's soul away temporarily to generate power is wrong. You know, Mayonnaise Uncle is actually a lot more sympathetic on the second readthrough

Mayonnaise Uncle also really had Cytherea's number in this scene and no one listened to him, he was the only one saying that Cytherea was suspicious and everyone else was disgusted by this, including Judith. No wonder he was so sour in Harrow's River bubble

Harrow wants to use Protesilaus' head for necromancy and everyone else is unhappy about this. But this isn't strange for the Nine Houses - the Canaan House skeletons were made from the dead just like the Ninth skeletons were, and just like the Sixth skeletons were in Dr. Sex, not to mention Ianthe's use of Babs' body. Like, if we are going to start complaining about the desecration of dead bodies now, I think that starts to call into question the entire way that the Nine Houses uses necromancy and has been using it for the past 10,000 years. I'm not sure any of the other necromancers really have that high ground

Palamedes says Cytherea only has days left to live, she definitely giggles at that

In the pool scene, Harrow says that the calculations for the deaths of the 200 children were very precise, and that the babies contributed the most thanergy. Now I'm wondering if Gideon failing to die might have messed up those careful calculations in some way? Obviously Harrow was still born a powerful necromancer, and it still worked overall, but now I'm curious

Harrow about John's blood ward: "I knew it had to open for me" because she was the descendant of Anastasia. She never questioned that there might have been some other reason it opened

[tangledbea]

this question's been eating me up for a while but is Zhan Tiri aka the big bad of TTS kinda lame? I can't really put it into words but everything from the design to her motivations to her plans just feels flat to me. Not to mention the retcon making her disciples being a few millennia old which... do the writers not get how long that is and how that massively affects the human psyche (yes this is a gothel thing). Idk I feel like there could've been a better villain than this British ghost girl??

Zhan Tiri was far more interesting when she was a demon made up of sharp angles locked in another realm. She was so much more menacing, so much more threatening. Ancient eldritch beings looming in the shadows with a millennia-old grudge against our protagonist and their homeland just hits completely different.

Do you know what I theorized during seasons one and two before we met her (then, him)? I theorized that the blizzard he sent/transformed into and moved through Corona was meant to destroy the Sundrop flower. I theorized that the Sundrop was the only thing that could truly stop him for good. I theorized that, by hypnotizing the Sundrop itself into pledging her allegiance to him ("Painter's Block"), he would gain some measure of control over Rapunzel (and also Lance, Feldspar, Ulf and Friedeborg). I theorized that he wanted to drain her, specifically ("Rapunzeltopia"), because she could stop him when no one else could.

If I had to wager a guess, I'd say that they didn't really know what they wanted to do with ZT from the beginning, either (just like the Brotherhood), which is why it was so easy to change her design and designated gender into the little goth girl. For a joke, they could literally upturn the direction of the Big Bad, because it wasn't set in stone.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

I have also realized that last time I was having bone pain and seemed to be dealing with high blood calcium, taking magnesium really helped. It would also lower my blood pressure [one main risk for kidney damage when they slow down is your blood pressure getting too high]. So long as I don't over-do it, starting to take some magnesium again will help with both blood pressure and with getting extra calcium and phosphorus out of my blood so it stops fucking with my bones, and will help prevent me from developing cardiac spasms this time.

All of this really was way worse 5 years ago, and I recovered. I recovered while not even realizing I should be avoiding phosphorus or sugar... And eating mostly oreos and pork to avoid letting my blood calcium spike [because it was causing heart attacks, see I am not even having daily heart attacks! I wish that was a joke].

And I think the only reason why the problem came back is because I had coca cola every day for like 4 months [in pursuit of atp] and then started a daily multivitamin... And then had loratadine twice daily for 1-2 weeks because of that autoimmune attack -and- stacked aspirin and avdil and another antihistamine on top of it. I think if I just do not do that, I should be okay. The autoimmune attack has calmed the fuck down now anyway.

I think so long as I do a recovery plan and do not drink coca cola daily or have a daily multivitamin anymore, I'll be okay, it's just going to take time to recover and that's very annoying because my hands/arms really fucking hurt, and painkillers might make the problem worse and aren't helping very much anyway.

And to be clear the only reason I am not already at the hospital or clinic asking for tests now, is because I have been through this before and it has been -proven- they will go out of their way not to help me until my symptoms are so far past that all anyone can do is speculate on what the problem was and if I had "really stopped peeing for over a week" or was "really" having what perfectly describes cardiac spasms including my blood pressure suddenly tripling. All it'll do is run my body down and expose me to the sun and corona which is probably part of what triggered this to begin with. I -also- wish doctors would do their jobs and take me seriously so it was actually of use for me to go to a doctor about this... But also my doctor just gave me the worst kind of 'doctor breaking up with you' phone call and I haven't tracked down a local clinic yet that isn't part of their doctor clique.

I am asking you not to worry. And I am doing it in good faith that I really will be fine.

I was so so so so so much closer to dying of this 5 years ago and no one helped me then either, in fact my roommates were consistently bringing corona home, caused a black mold problem in my room and kept letting the c0 from the dryer exhaust flood the basement where I lived... And that's not happening this time either! So don't worry too much. My kidneys and liver seem to do the same thing as my thyroid gland [bounce back so they can threaten to fall under attack all over again sometime later].

They gave my thyroid 5 months to live 10-15 ish years ago, and it's like, fine actually, I just have to manually manage my iodine intake because it's my immune system's favourite chew toy. The problem with my thyroid is literally that it just keeps healing instead of dying so I am -stuck- in the hyperthyroid initial phase of thyroiditis... Indefinitely [hence having hashimoto's that somehow acts like graves disease and halfway tests that way because my thyroid levels are high as shit instead of low]. My immune system attacks my organs and tissues and then if I can give them what they need and calm down the attack, they heal. I have no choice in this and I have never had a doctor who actually knew the full scope of what they were looking at anyway. My body just chews on itself for fun and I can't stop any of it.

I am going to be whiny about it. This is me being whiny about it.

I am used to bounding back from everything withing like 3 days unless it's an ongoing autoimmune problem... The last time this took MONTHS to feel significantly better and like a year+ to fully stop having heart problems. Again, it was way worse last time and I had way less idea what was happening, but I don't want to deal with this for the next 3-6 months and that's making me feel more whiny about the whole thing. Like your hand hurting is one thing, but knowing it's going to keep hurting like that for half a year? Instantly exhausting. Migraines suck, but knowing you have had them last 1-3 months without stopping and that advil won't save you? ahahahahahahaha

But I'll find a way to cope. I'll probably just get slightly weird about something online. But in my defense when I was dying of organ failure last time, and was exposed to c0 and black mold at the same time, no one accused me of those things, so I have to imagine I somehow managed to not be *that* weird.

And if I don't get better and my kidneys keep getting worse I will go to a clinic and demand they test my kidney function like a broken record until someone does, and if I am far gone enough to actually need treatment, they will have a very hard time denying me treatment. I will involve lawyers if I have to. I will talk to whatever bodies of authority can do anything to a doctor at all and I will make myself the biggest pain in the ass. My doctor already "patient fired" me, so if I think my life is actually on the line they will find out how much MORE annoying I can chose to be. I prommy <3

The only reason I am not doing that now is that the problem isn't far gone enough that it'll help me more than hurt me.

The only downside is that one of the best ways to decrease blood calcium and phosphorus is to make your urine more acidic... But I already have gout, so there's some kind of balancing act I need to figure out here and a question of how many beets I should actually be eating and which pain/problem is worse or more pressing. There's a chance that if I ignore my liver entirely for now and strip all excess purines etc from my diet I can keep a few key things incorporated and not make either problem any worse. And at least all information I can find all confirms green tea will help every problem I have without hurting any of them, and I have this whole fucking collection I couldn't drink before because it make me pee 50 times a day.

Worse case scenario I deal with gout for way longer to get the extra phosphorus out of my blood so the calcium bone pain thing stops being a problem and then address the gout.

And complain about it T~T I want steak and cokey cola.