#coochie clenching just for him<3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[jeonjcngkook]

How are you sweet? My sincerest condolences to you and your loved ones. Also this new era of JK is truly something else, I’m at a complete loss.

hello bby!! im doing okay. thank you for the kindest words; ive had my time to grieve so i’m thankful for that❤️‍🩹

AS FOR JUNGKOOK LATELY?????? FUCK IVE GONE PAST COMPLETE LOSS INTO UTTER DEVASTATION MODE NFHFSHFSJFSJFSJF;8:85;85,9)!???!!/?/£&:

^^^^^ THIS IS FUCKING INSANEITSJFZJFZ !!!!! HE LIVES IN MY HEAD RENT FUCKING FREE!!!!! THE LEATHER COLLAR !!!! THE HAIR !!!! THE TATTOOS !!!!!! THE FIT !!£/&:£)!!!!!!! HE IS SO 90s GRUNGE I CAN FEEL THE FLUTTERING ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

AND THE 180 SWITCH FROM 90s HEARTTHROB TO JAMES BOND AGENT IN THAT DELICIOUS RALF LAUREN SUIT 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 MY MIND IS SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL 😵‍💫

AND HERE ???7?(8?92*%~+%,*%,$>,$>,*!.!/!&/€=\+>yxiyoubpktjsosne AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WE’VE GONe FROM JAG JK TO ROLCE ROYCE JK DRIPPING IN JEWELS 💎💎 I. AM. ON. MY. FUCKING. KNEES.

i have ascended. i have been to heaven and hell in the last 12 hours ⛓️🫠🗣️❤️‍🩹 …… and u? 🖤👀

[blkkizzat]

❛ IN YO PU$$Y TONGUE TWISTIN' LIKE ITS STIR FRY!❜

✰summary: don't ask toji to make you dinner if you aren't ready to be dinner ✰tw: nasty, filthy, insane pussy eating like its groceries. literal groceries cause there's lots of food/cooking sex references lmfao. ✰wc: <1k [no taglist under 1k]

Toji who you sass, telling him to be useful for once and "make you dinner." Unfortunately for you, Toji takes it quite literally as he makes you HIS dinner.

Without any warning you are manhandled down to the couch. Your brand new pink frilly panties utterly trashed, ripped off of you and discarded like a flimsy plastic wrap. Toji kneads open your doughy thighs, ordering you to hold your knees so that you are spread wide for him.

Succumbing to his more debased urges, your coochie would be his 'kitchen' for the next 2 hours. It was obvious from the perverse way his lips smacked together, sucking his teeth at the sight of your succulent cunt—he couldn't wait to serve you up on a platter.

Digging in, Toji wastes no time with prep work. 

Unabashedly feasting in your savory folds as if he were a gourmet who had just been presented with a 10-course 3-star michelin meal. Toji's filthy mouth proves to be such a needy glutton for your pretty pussy—slurping, suckling and nibbling at your sensitive lil’ clit until you’re sobbing. You clench and twitch around his tongue which seems to be on a mission to completely sear your insides, reducing your to legs to gelatinous goo. 

All the heat Toji boils in your core spreads to your entire body and your hands grow slippery with sweat. You shake as you struggle to maintain hold of your knees. Yet the scalding look Toji gives you makes you think twice before you let go of them—lest chef Toji say the dish is ruined and he needs to start all over again. 

“Chef knows best” Toji tells you, along with his specialty cuisine style of "making it nasty", so of course he must braise your swollen throbbing clit in globs of his spit. His tongue bastes over your sopping folds as he scoops the marinated mixture—crafted of his saliva and the syrupy juices of your ripened cunt—back into your steamy quivering hole. 

At the very least you were grateful that despite the embarrassment flaming on your tear-stained cheeks, the amount of carnal pleasure coursing through your body sent your mind into euphoric delirium. Your eyes spared you from the sight of Toji's shameless display of ravenous hunger by becoming lodged into the back of your skull.

Nevertheless, you didn’t need to see to tell that Toji is a messy cook. Some of your rich milky sauce is sure to dribble down to the crack of your ass as his lecherous ministrations cause you to overflow. Not to worry though—when it comes to relishing your perfect pussy, Toji ultimately keeps a tidy kitchen and he is certainly not wasteful. 

Toji will dutifully clean up any mess, unlike your actual kitchen where he never washes a dish. Likewise, although when you try to get him to eat healthier and he refuses his greens—Toji will never hesitate to toss your salad. Stirring his tongue deep into your puckered hole he savors the taste while three of his thick fingers bully into your tight lil’ pussy, blending you up until you pureed all over his fingers.

The intensity of your lustful moans rival that of the vulgar sounds sloshing from your core and echoing throughout the living room. Both sounds Toji finds himself developing an insatiable hunger for and it spurs on his near relentless teasing of you. 

Duplicitous in his positively feral pussy drunk state, he reasons with you that "a chef never reveals his secrets".

Therefore you are never certain upon reaching the peak of your next mind-mincing orgasm if he will serve you utterly delectable release—the sweet nectar of your squirt garnishing his lips resulting in Toji to nearly busting in his own pants from rutting against the sofa—

—or if he will cruelly snatch it away from you again as you teeter right on the edge of rapture. When he does this there is certainly a twinkle in his eyes as he mocks you, "but you weren't quite done simmering just yet, mamas."

Absolutely overdone and oversensitive, if the torture of him stewing your insides becomes too much—If you really whine and tell him you've had enough—to his credit Toji would stop. Stop and hover mere centimeters away from your leaky lil’ peach that is. 

You would whimper, so sore from the abuse of his tongue as his own eyes would roll back at the sugary smell of your arousal wafting off your messed up lil cunny. Toji knows at this point you are too fucked out—too thoroughly made well-done on his tongue to escape from his gluttonous depravity. 

Sloppy and glazed in your cum, the scar on Toji's lip glistens as it pulls into a devious smirk. Huffing out, Toji would softly breeze air over your puffy clit until your lil nub throbbed with enough need to beg for another course. 

Toji would oblige you of course. 

Nonetheless, as punishment for disturbing the chef while he’s cooking, you would have to wait a bit more before you felt his mouth on you again. Only blowing over your sex, your desperate pleas are only met with cruel chuckles chiding you that he needed to "let his food cool properly" before he could eat the next serving.

In the end, Toji's hard efforts in your kitchen are rewarded as he thoroughly consumes every last morsel you have to offer, cleaning up every lingering string of your arousal. With his wanton thirst for your creamy caramelized cunt finally quenched he brings himself up to admire your cute slutted out pout. 

You gasp as Toji’s lips meet yours in a fiery kiss. His tongue is just chaotic, dominating your mouth as if he were still craving the taste of your core.

You're dizzy for air when Toji finally pulls away. Still coming down from your blissed out state you fail to notice Toji had switched your positions. You are now on the floor between his legs while he sits on the couch.

His beefy thighs manspread wide as his girthy length springs from his dark sweats. The angry red tip of his cockhead sways back to hit his abs thickly coated in what must be his own fluids from at some point cumming in his pants just from eating you out.

Reaching out to grab your chin his thumb rubs over your lips in a gentle caress before bullying them open. You were going to roast his cock in that warm n’ tight throaty lil oven of yours.

It was your turn to make him dinner.

✰ ©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.

✰a/n: y'all idk im hungry, on my period and i clearly got demons. that's all the defense i got so y'all can lock me away for this now. *runs away* p.s.plug!choso lovers this is not a fic, its a drabble i promise i literally wrote this in tumblr drafts don't kill me LOL

✰reblog & comments are my life's blood. ty!

[pokechbi]

🎀No Rest for the Wicked🎀

(Somnophiliac) König !!

im impatient and couldn't for the life of me wait for the poll to be over in a week, so here you go! Somnophiliac Konig FTW !!!

- 18+ NSFW, so MDNI! 🔞

- Fem anatomy used

- WC: 2.2K (not proofread bc again, my coochie wrote this)

I added a sound for this one, since this is the song i listened to while writing it! love me some lumi athena <3

This one's just plain filthy! Enjoy 💗

Whenever Konig sees you sleeping, his mind can't help but wander to what you're dreaming about. He can't help but stare at you for long periods of time, just thinking about you, letting his mind be utterly ravished by you. It always starts out innocently: He watches you breathe deeply, your chest rising and falling with every expansion of your lungs. He watches as your lips part, eyes moving around behind your eyelids as you dream about whatever it is that was on your subconscious mind.

He talks to you gently as you sleep, knowing you can't hear him. His nightly one-sided conversations often range from seemingly insignificant confessions, to admitting his filthy obsessions over you that he would surely be too ashamed to say out loud.

"Mein schatz...You drive me so crazy. Every second of the day, I just want to touch you...to love you. To be inside of you..." He'd say, feeling himself getting worked up just watching you take his words in, without knowing you are. He contemplates what else you can take in without knowing. He'd imagine you just lying there, your peaceful sleeping form blissfully unaware as your sweet plushy walls subconsciously clench around him, pulsating with every beat of your heart.

When you first started finding yourself falling asleep near him, he would never think of doing such a thing to you, even though it darkly plagued his mind every time you slept near him. It drove him crazy, just watching you. He didn't know why he was like this, and he would always stop before you woke up. A much different ending than how it happened nowadays. But before you became aware of what he was doing, waking with a confusion and a sopping wetness between your legs, feeling the pleasure and utter ecstasy running through your veins, part of him always had the impulsive need to run his hands over you while you were asleep, and more. It would start small, like gently running his large hands over your face, testing how much of a heavy sleeper you were, how much you could take before your pretty eyes fluttered open in confusion and lostness.

There were times when you stayed asleep through all of it. From when his heavy breaths caressed your sleeping face, practically drooling as he grinded himself against your ass, feeling himself harden and jerk with every touch of your skin against his. He'd move his hands to your breasts, fondling your nipples and watching as they hardened against his fingertips subconsciously. He watched as your breathing hitched in your sleep, your dreams probably taking a very nasty turn. He'd take the fat of your thigh in his hand, lifting it and gently turning you on your back, as to not wake you by being too rough (even though he wanted nothing more than to absolutely ruin you). He'd shuffle down, placing his head between your legs as he inhaled your scent. It fueled him, made the blood rush to his cock at the speed of sound. He'd start off gentle, ever so slightly flicking his tongue against your sleeping clit, testing your limits to see if you'd wake up. He'd go in for more once he saw that you were sleeping deeply, sucking at your little bundle of sensitive flesh, your thigh jerking subconsciously. It entertained him, and had it not been for the human body waking itself to external stimuli, he could entertain himself for hours. Just watching how your body loved him even while it was asleep.

He'd smile deviously, eating you out and helping your cunt become a sopping, weeping mess in preparation for his growing cock. Once you were absolutely dripping wet, he'd slowly rise to lie next to you, turning you on your side and spooning you. He'd lift your leg up, holding them wide open as he slid his cock back and forth between your pussy lips, groaning quietly as he coated the head in your wetness. Once he was hard enough, he'd enter you so painfully slow, his eyes rolling back into his head as he held himself from pounding his dick into your cervix. He'll be propped up on his elbow, watching your face carefully to make sure you're not waken up by his insatiable appetite for your sweet little hole. Not being able to grunt and groan caused him to practically drool, wiping the beads of sweat from his forehead as he fucked you, nice and slow. And when he feels like he's had enough, he'll close your thighs over his cock, slipping it between the pooling wetness right under your pussy. And once he's found the perfect spot, feeling your clit graze the swollen, throbbing head of his dick while your thighs caress the rest of his shaft, he'll start going to town.

He'll pick up speed, pressing your thighs tighter around his shaft, feeling the familiar tightening in his core, signaling that he's about to spill his hot, sticky cum all over your thighs and cunt. His cock hardens as he breathes shakily, digging his fingers into your thighs, not caring about waking you at this point. The coil in his balls snap, and his dick pulsates as he spills his cum all over your pussy and thighs.

"Mein gott..." He whispers, his voice practically a grumble. "Look what you do to me, schatz."

You'd wake up in the morning feeling sticky between your legs, your eyes peeling open lazily as you reach a hand down to your cunt, collecting the sticky substance around your fingers. You bring it up to your nose, smelling the sour smell of sex and semen. You turn to look at a sleeping Konig, and you just knew. You knew that deep breathing, that smell of sweat and manly musk that he radiated when your pussy had just put him to sleep. You smiled triumphantly, feeling proud of yourself because of the fact that you had him so damn pussy whipped, even when you were sleeping. You in your most vulnerable moment, the moment where you felt the least sexy, had managed to turn this battering ram of a man into a horny, desperate filthy mess.

And then there were the times when you did wake up, mid thrust, confused and lost but the only thing you knew was you wanted it harder. You needed it harder, faster. He knew you'd woken up, now mercilessly pounding into you, replacing every waking thought that dared to generate with the feeling of pure, utter euphoria. His hand wrapped around your throat, squeezing as if his life depended on it. All you could think about was his dick, hard and throbbing as he laid behind you, holding your thigh up as your walls squelched and wept around him. He let out a string of German expletives, all of his sounds previously held back now releasing themselves ten-fold.

"Scheisse...my pretty liebe. Did I wake you? How does it feel when I fuck you awake, hm? When all you can think about is my hard cock, going so fucking deep that I touch your womb, hm?" He says breathlessly in your ear, his grunts and groans dominating your gentle, sleep-laced moans and whimpers as he fucks you harder. "Mm...Konig. Feels so good, baby. Please...faster?" You ask, your voice shaking and still grumbly with sleep. Your eyes had barely managed to peel open, keeping them squeezed shut as if the feeling of his fat cock inside of you would leak out if you dared to open them. "You want it faster, my schatz?" He asks, his voice hiding a bit of taunt to them. "Mhmm. 'm gonna cum, please...go faster" You ask, the need for him practically dripping from your lips.

"You will cum when I say you can, yes?" He taunts. Your mouth hung open in disbelief, whimpering and tears brimming your eyes. You were so close, so close to releasing yourself all over his cock. He loved to dangle orgasms in your face, loved to see how you crumbled to a sobbing, horny, squelching mess under him as he denied you the release you so badly needed. He loved when you cried for it, tears staining your cheeks and lips going puffy as you bit them hard, trying not to cum against his wishes. What happened when you broke that rule was a story for another time...

"Such a good little schatz, listening to me so well, yeah?" He whispered in your ear, letting go of your thigh and wrapping his hand around your hips, resting on your swollen, throbbing clit. You jerk as the pad of his thick finger circles your clit, and you start to feel a familiar warmth pool in your bladder instantly. He continues sliding in and out of you, bottoming out as you take every inch, right to the damn hilt. He fucks you harder and faster, your tits bouncing and jiggling as he watches them. He chuckles lowly, grunting in your ear as he plays with your clit. "Look at you. Such a hure for me." (whore) "Letting me use you while you sleep. You like it, don't you? You like when you wake up, my cum all over your pretty little thighs, right mein liebe?" He whispers, taunting you as you feel yourself start to stumble over the edge. Your head goes hot with impatience, shaking violently because you can't hold it any fucking longer.

"P-please, Konig. 'm gonna cum. 'lease let me cum." You beg, finally peeling your eyes open to look at him. He looks down at you and smiles, leaning down and kissing your forehead. "How can I say no when you beg so fucking good for me, dear" He replies, lowering his lips to yours. Your lips part and your jaw goes slack as he quickens his pace, the swollen head of his cock relentlessly pushing into your plushy little spot, conjuring what will be one of the strongest orgasms your body has ever managed to produce. "Cum for me, baby." He breathes. Your breathing hitches as you moan and yell into the kiss, your lips open and smashed together as you both groan and moan into each other's mouths. He presses his forehead to yours, beads of sweat colliding and slicking your skins as he rubs your clit harder, fucking you like the world will meet its demise if he doesn't fuck you so deep you feel his cock in your throat. You feel the warmth from your bladder spill into your clit as you squirt all over his fingers, your juices pooling under your thigh as you yell and moan, the only time you felt compelled enough to scream. He chuckles devilishly as you cum, your soft walls violently pulsating around his dick, his hand covered in your squirt. His hand moves back to your thigh, his death grip causing your flesh to mold around his fingers as he holds it up.

You feel his cock harden and his grip around your throat tighten again as he gets close to his edge, kissing you hungrily as you shake and spasm under him. The overstimulation makes your brain go absolutely stupid on his dick. The way he kisses you borders around dangerous, his insatiable appetite only growing as he gets closer to finishing. He groans against your lips, his hips faltering as you feel his dick pulsate inside of you, spilling his hot seed all over your walls.

"Oh, scheisse. Scheisse scheisse. Du fühlst dich so verdammt gut" (You feel so damn good). He moans, his voice shaking with pure euphoria. You breathe heavily, your thighs shaking as he pulls out from you, a sickening squelch ringing out as he does so. He lands on his back, lowering your thigh gently as he heaves. His hand releases your throat, peeling your wet hair from your face, slick with sweat. You lie there, completely dumbstruck, your mind racing miles a minute and trying to recover from the utter loss of brain cells it just endured. You hear him shift to look down at your leaking, sopping pussy, praying he'd let you recover from how he had just fucked you stupid.

He shakes his head, positioning himself beside you again. "Tsk tsk, you're leaking, dear. Can't have any of my seed escape you, hm? Let me just-" You whimper as he slides his still-hard cock into you gently, feeling his cum pool in your deepest parts as he fucks his seed back into you. "Need to keep you filled up, mein schatz, yeah?" He breathes, kissing you on your cheek, flushed a deep shade of red. You nod your head at him lazily, your eyes fluttering closed once more, your body completely spent. He chuckles lowly as he kisses your face gently, covering you with the cool comforter as the smell of pure, raw sex permeates your senses.

"Sleep now, mein liebe. I can't promise I won't bother you this time." He whispers, his voice laced with a smile. "There is no rest for the wicked, dear."

[milkzoro]

roronoa zoro being pussy drunk is a thought that nvr leaves my mind <3

-> contents: coochie eating! overstimulation! piss!! (squirting)

♥️♥️♥️ MDNI

zoro loved coming home to you after a long day. full day battles left him drained but the dopamine he received from you was his greatest pleasure. his pretty girl, how he dreamed he would come across his other half.

he saw you relaxed in your shared bed watching some boring documentary, he’s gonna take care of you. ‘my heart, my meal,’ was all he thought. he was ready to devour.

immediately he’s at your side, kissing and smiling against your warm skin. you knew what was coming, it was practically part of his routine at this point.

“zoro~” you mumble, tired eyes looking down at him.

he quickly got to work with your nightwear, helping you remove your sweats.

“needa taste my girl~ ‘m so starved.” he nips and kisses at your hips and lower stomach. he’s getting sloppier and needier with each wet kiss.

he loved to tease you, play with you just a little bit.

as he’s laid between your legs he plays with the elastic of your panties, pulling with his teeth and allowing them to snap against your skin.

one your panties were fully removed, he kissed even more, getting a taste of every available square inch. he loved traveling down from your belly to your thighs, purposefully avoiding your achy cunt.

his strong hands met with yours, holding them tightly before diving in. his tongue swiping between your slick folds, slurping up your sweet juices. you felt his mouth vibrate as he hummed against you, making you arch your back and grind up against his glistening face.

“oh god please-” he begged, he wants you to cum so bad. you moving your hips up and squeezing around his face, soo sexy, he needs your juices drowning him.

he’s so intoxicated from your taste, much more than he has even been with any type of booze.

his hands leave yours for a moment to tie down your trembling legs. he pushes his face down more, devoting all of his attention to your sensitive bud. each of his suckles and kisses were matched with sporadic moans and whispers escaping your lips.

you felt the waves coming, euphoric pounding building in your lower abdomen, you couldn’t help but cry. “zo- t-too much!! haah- fuck baby mm so close!”

zoro’s pace never faltered as he heard your pathetic whines to stop him, he was on a mission.

his tongue drew swift circles around your pretty clit, his spit mixed with your slick made his muscle feel heavenly.

“fuck, hold still y/n, gonna make you squirt. please-” he needed it so bad, the look on your face whenever you pissed on him was like no other. your pretty face whining in pleasure, he needed to drink you up.

“squirt on my face, baby.” he begged again, this time putting two fingers at the entrance of your weeping hole.

the light touch of his digits made you clench at nothing. fuck, you missed his mouth so much. “p-promise i’ll squirt zo~♡ please, p-put em in- ahh!”

zoro did just that, his thick ring and index fingers curled beautifully in you. gifting you a few pumps then carefully pressing against the spongey pad at the hight of your cervix.

he noticed your muffled moans as you held your hands to cover your mouth, but he needed to hear you. as he felt your flood coming, his lovely treat, he pinched the inside of your leg to hear those sweet sounds from you. the pain mixed with the pleasure was too much, you couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“zoro!!” you cried out, feeling your walls being broken down at the touch of his skilled fingers. he was satisfied, he removed his digits and quickly latched back onto you with his mouth, milking you of you cum.

your ears rang as pleasure consumed your body, hips and legs quivering as you released everything within you onto his eager face.

open mouth kisses on your pretty cunt as he drank all that he could. peering up at you devilishly as he continued his soft licks.

he kept going.. “zoro!! please!! gonna f-fuck gonna cum again~”

he hummed against your achy clit as he milked you one more time.

he met his eyes back with yours once he finished his meal.

“that’s my girl.”

~

this was based off real life events, zoro just ate me out.

[rinstaro]

Hyrule, wild, twi, time, and sky’s reaction to reader squirting on them for the first time? How would they deal with the reader being super shy after?

ur a genius. i love this ask MWAH let me give you a kiss. i’ve been having a hard time writing but i really like this idea

i played around with formatting here lol, looks weird.

cw: squirting obv, overstim, coochie eating, praise, breeding kink in times, he also calls you pup, fingering, doggy, mating press, reader has a vagina no pronouns

minors do not interact.

hyrule

will be shy himself! he’s in such belief that he did that to you. he made you feel so good you squirted on him. i wouldn’t be surprised if he came right there or even came untouched. and even then, he’s hard again immediately. he'd flush with excitement, asking you over and over how good it felt. it only makes you more embarrassed.

you whimpered his name over and over as the knot in your stomach began to unravel. he groaned into your cunt, lips attached to your clit. you looked down at him, shuddering at the sight of him staring back at you like a starved man. your orgasm hit abruptly, causing your legs to kick out and your cunt to spray all over his face. your boyfriend almost choked at the sudden orgasm that hit him, staring at you wide eyed as his cum pooled onto the sheets. once the both of you caught your breath, you apologized profusely.

"n-no! it was, fuck, it was so hot, sweetheart. c-can we... i wanna try that again.”

wild

oh he’s smug. he’s so proud of himself. he’s always doing things for others but pleasing you was special to him. he stops for a moment to just watch you gush and then goes down to kiss your clit. he'll quiet your embarrassed cries by telling you how pretty you looked.

your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath. your legs trembled in his hold, his fingertips leaving small bruises on your thighs. he stared down at the spot where you two met. your soaked pussy was still fluttering around him. when wild looked back at your face, you were whimpering in embarrassment, arms hiding your face. he chuckled softly, gently moving your arms out of the way.

"f-fuck babe im sorry-"

"no no, baby, you were so pretty. you think i can make you do that again before i cum?”

twi

an animal. you don’t get a chance to be shy because he doesn’t stop, not even for a second. whether he’s drinking down your cum or fucking you through your orgasm, he needs you to do it again. he needs to taste it, to feel it— he just needs more and will go for as long as he’s allowed.

you hid your face in the pillows, the soft material muffling your wails. twilight wouldn't let up, pounding into you as if he didn't know when he'd get the chance again. he'd been desperate, barely giving you a chance to breathe as he ravaged all of your sensitive spots before manhandling you onto all fours. you felt your orgasm coming, and he could too. "go on 'n cum, you deserve it, doll." you obeyed without a word, sobbing when you squirted all over the sheets. his thrusts never stop, making you squirm to escape his grasp.

"not done yet. i want you to drench me, 'kay darlin'?"

time

a menace! will tease you about it relentlessly both degrading and praising you. immediately goes to make you do it again, watching your face the entire time. he wants to watch your face this time as you cum so hard that you soak him. it because his goal now to make you squirt at least once every time you have sex

your dear husband had you in a mating press, dick stretching your poor cunt as far as it could go. your eyes were crossed as you let out little 'ah-ah-ahs' at his harsh thrusts. time wanted to fuck you full, making sure you had at least 3 loads in you by the time he was done. he wanted you stuffed full with a kid asap. time felt you clenching around him and began to play with your clit, making you feel so good you could cry. you shrieked suddenly, body seizing up as you came. “dirty, dirty pup," he called. you whined, uttering a quiet 'don’t look, please' that made him chuckle and grab your chin. "you squeezed me so hard, felt so good. you're so messy... could you do that again for me, dear?”

sky

lets you ride it out and then asks you what the fuck was that LMAO. like he knows, he's just so surprised that it happened out of no where. he wasn't even trying. but now he's going to have to make you cum like that every time. so he's gonna take his time making you cum on his fingers, his tongue, and his dick. it may take a few nights but he is determined.

your sweet boyfriend had been in between your legs prodding at your g spot with his fingers for what seemed like forever. you'd already cum twice, but this one felt stronger. your moans rose in volume as you finally caved, sensitive cunt gushing all over sky's arm. sky didn’t know where to look. his soaked hand, your trembling legs, or your fucked out face. you just sprayed all over him and you were mortified. you pulled your legs in, turning your head and hiding your face from him. he smiled down at your form. "don't be shy, sweetheart... need you to do that again. on my cock this time. maybe on my face later if you're not too passed out. pretty please? wanna feel your cunt squeeze me like you did my fingers."

[emisprocrastinatingbywriting]

Alone and Forsaken

Chapter 14 Summary:

The road to Jackson had been difficult, lives and bonds having already been tested, but nothing could have prepared you for this. When a petty fight and a subsequent make up session turns into the fight of your lives, will either of be able to escape?

Warnings: Angst, Abandonment Issues, Fluff, Hurt & Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Cults, Blood Sacrifice, Smut, Oral m&f receiving, Breeding Kink!Joel (u can't change my mind on that), Joel Def Has Needed a Hug Since Like 2003, Reader Having Major Anxieties About the Future.

A/N:

Hello my loves, we're back! Missed y'all, I've been putting my whole coochie into this one so prepare yourselves.

This week, the road to Jackson continues. This one is a little heavy on the violence, as different sort of group is introduced to reader and Joel. So if that bothers you, please err on the side of caution. Along with that, some talk about reader's former group(cult) so if there's some religious trauma lurking inside, maybe sit this one out. As always, take care of yourselves and you could always message me for sparknotes later haha. Aside from that, I do feed y'all with some smut too! Gotta have balance ya know :)

Let me know what you think! Enjoy <3

Chapter 14/20

Chapter 14: The Road to Jackson Pt. 2

The second the beaten up truck had crossed over state lines into Wyoming, an anvil of stress had been placed on Joel’s shoulders. Despite the finish line being in sight, it was like he couldn’t breathe without you within arm’s reach. It had been four days since the daring escape from the library in Montana and he had been stuck to you like glue ever since. He was almost manic in the way he chased after you, never allowing you to take a single step without him directly behind you. 

At first it was sweet, albeit a little annoying, but you allowed it because of how scared he seemed. Joel had sobbed, actually sobbed, into your chest before he promptly passed out from the exhaustion of it all against your shoulder. After driving for the entirety of the day, hoping desperately that the signs you followed were somewhat accurate. Did the Jackson community that Joel’s brother lived in, actually reside in the bones of where Jackson county used to be? Was it somewhere nearby? You weren’t sure, but following the blocked letters on the faded highway signs was preferable to waking the man that snored into your ear. 

Once the sun was long gone from the sky and the road became barely visible to your tired eyes, you finally pulled off into a weigh station for transport trucks. Parking behind the small building where the department of transportation had once surveyed the area, you peered out the windows. An abandoned transport sat across from you, but there was no sign of whoever had been driving it twenty years prior. Nor was there any sign of life from the brick building to your left that looked like it had a hole blown into the side of it. With no reason to put it off any longer, you finally bit the bullet and woke Joel up. 

Joel had woken with a start, as you knew he would, which he quickly tried to pass off as a stupid dream. He laughed when you tried to pry at first but all it took was a sideways glance and a sassy, “are you fucking serious Joel?”, for him to break. He sighed, explaining how he was terrified of losing you, despite the constant reassurances that you were fine.

“I just won’t do it, I can’t do it baby. I’ve lost so much and this…,” Joel trailed off, rubbing mindlessly at his chest with his clenched fist. 

“This is a lot,” you finished for him. 

He nodded, his big brown eyes making your heart ache inside your chest. Biting your lip to keep it from trembling, you hummed in acknowledgement. What could you say to quell his fears? This situation, the situations that came before that one, and the one before that, were all a lot. 

Joel was a lot. 

You were a lot. 

The baggage the two of you carried was heavy, along with the baggage you both accumulated along the way, but the pain was worth the prize. Or at least, you thought so. 

You sighed, “What can I do?” 

“Just let me fuss over ya for a while. I promise I don’t mean nothing by it, I just…”

“I get it, you want to stay close to me for a bit. It’s okay, I don’t mind,” you finished for him once more, smiling when he finally released some of the tension from his shoulders. 

He was scared of losing the only person he had, or at least the only person he truly let himself have. That was understandable and you decided to grant him the favor of becoming your shadow as you made the way to Jackson. For the first two days it was cute, but the constant hovering soon got old. Usually it was you chasing after Joel but now it was him. It wasn’t that you didn’t want him around, just that you preferred to not trip over him at every turn. 

The fact that the rugged ex hunter, ex smuggler, ex contractor, Mr. Joel Miller was anxious enough to be perpetually underfoot while on the dangerous route was unbelievable. And it was that implausibility that kept you silent on the matter, despite the bitter annoyance that bloomed in your chest. If he was truly scared enough to be careless, you felt as though you needed to grant him his fussing. It was only after Joel had almost gotten the two of you killed in a gas station that you had to finally put your foot down. 

With over half of the fourth day on the road already behind you, along with an upset stomach and the need for fresh air, you had begged Joel to pull off into a rest stop. In actuality, you needed space but the moment your feet touched the ground, he was already in front of you. Normally that wouldn’t bother you but with how tired you were, you had to swallow the urge to snap at him. 

Joel, unbeknownst to your angst, followed closely behind as you trudged into the store. When the door slid open after a few tries, you stepped inside and waited for any sign of predators but none came. When he pressed a finger to his lips, you nodded, vowing to be quiet as you searched the shelves for anything of use. You had halted in one of the aisles to examine a slightly water damaged box of tampons, kicking yourself for forgetting to ask Joel to grab some out of your mother’s washroom before you left. However, the box fell from your hands when a wall of muscle had knocked into you. 

Joel had slammed into you from behind, causing you to trip over a nearby display. He caught you on the way down, ensuring that you didn’t tumble down with the cardboard cutout advertising a new flavor of cola. Although you were safe from falling on your ass, that didn’t stop the loud smack that alerted the infected souls that soon came pouring out of the back room. 

Needlessly cussing him out as you scrambled back towards the truck, Joel had closed the door right in time for a half a dozen clickers to slam themselves into the driver’s side. When he finally managed to shift it into drive, his window was seconds from breaking. The spiderwebbed glass glared at you as Joel veered back on to the highway, making your chest tight with fear and hot with rage. It was truly a miracle that you had made it out of there alive and while he was elated by that fact, you were pissed. 

“Jesus honey, that was fucking close,” Joel laughed. 

The laughter grated on you, forcing out a response that you had been keeping back for days. 

“Well maybe, if you hadn’t been up my ass then that wouldn’t have fucking happened Joel!,” you snapped. 

And so the argument began. While you were trying to explain how you didn’t need him to hover over you like some sort of mama bear, Joel was countering it by arguing that he was just trying to make sure you were safe. It was maddening, the same fight between the two of you being hashed out over and over until one party finally apologized, but this time both of you were unwilling to break. 

Perhaps it was the stress of the road, or perhaps it was the exhaustion that had settled in your bones in the days since leaving the library, but you didn’t have the patience for it any longer. For the entirety of the day, Joel had been forced to constantly reroute the path to Jackson due to the snow or piled up cars and junk in the way. You were getting nowhere fast and with the gas dwindling, the stress of the situation started to weigh down on your increasingly fragile patience. When he had finally found an open road around midday, whooping as he pulled the truck back onto the highway, you were well past being soothed. That, along with the close call that had just happened, had you primed and ready for some desperately needed crying. 

The need for sleep, a deep and peaceful one where Joel was curved around your backside, holding you tightly as you both dreamed, was becoming dire. Bags gathered around your eyes and your skin had grown dull from the small portions you barely managed to gulp down, yet you tried to push through the stress for his sake. You felt ridiculous, cursing yourself for being so weak while Joel seemed completely fine with the few hours of sleep he got during your short turns behind the wheel. Feeling tired of the fighting, of the road, of him, of yourself, you finally dissolved into a puddle of tears. 

The bickering between Joel and you was in full swing. Both of you had already said your piece about his constant presence but he continued to pick and somewhere in the haze of it all, you got lost. Loneliness and exhaustion curved your spine, making you slump down in your seat as Joel ranted about safety. He was missing the point of your argument but you didn’t care anymore. Aching for the quiet home in the woods that you had known for just a little over two months, along with a mate whose emotions weren’t rubbed quite as raw as his were now, the tears came quick. 

The guilt of being upset with Joel for caring too much pressed into your chest, making you hold in all of the pained cries that thickened the lining of your throat for as long as you possibly could. You knew he had reason to feel how he did. Joel had said so himself, he had lost so much. And you? Well, you were the bitch that snapped at him for giving a damn. Feeling overwhelmed and childish, you chewed at your lips until they were red with blood and tried to focus on the road ahead. 

“ - And that ain’t gonna fly with me darling, I’m not letting you out of my sight until - wait, what? Sweetheart, are you crying?,” Joel suddenly asked, his voice growing soft as he looked over and saw the wet trails that glistened on your cheeks. 

“No,” you croaked. 

The sob that weasled its way out of your mouth betrayed the response and Joel cussed. Quietly berating himself as you tried to will the pesky tears away, he slowly came to a stop along the side of the road. Nothing but trees and abandoned cars surrounded the truck, aside from a sign boasting a small town a couple miles away. You stared at the faded faces of town residents that smiled down at the oncoming traffic, noticing how they were all dressed in the garb of their respective agricultural professions. 

The farmer’s face was almost completely blurred with time and it reminded you of the concaved skull of the alpha that had choked you back at the library. His head had cracked open under the strength of Joel’s fists and the sound that it had made while doing so was something you would never forget. Thinking about the wet crunch of his knuckles slamming through bone, you were suddenly reminded of where you were. 

You were bawling in a parked truck in the middle of nowhere, with Joel scooching towards you to provide comfort, and all you could feel was embarrassment. This was no time for a crying session about the woes of traveling, or for petty fights with a partner over someone standing a little too close, it was a time to act. Wiping the tears from your cheeks before Joel could get to them, you quickly plastered on a sugary smile and shook your head at his advances. 

“I’m sorry, it’s fine. I’m actually fine, just a bit tired,” you said in a chirper tone, making Joel’s hands freeze mid air. 

He blinked, “But… You’re crying?”

The laugh you gave him was forced, sounding high pitched and off key to even your own ears, but Joel didn’t flinch. He just looked absolutely flabbergasted as you tried hopelessly to push him away. You inwardly cursed him for being able to read you so well. No matter how hard you tried to fix the smile on your face, it refused to come off as anything other than fake and Joel easily saw right through it. 

“I’m totally fine babe, just a bit tired is all. Nothing a nap can’t fix,” you promised. 

Joel nodded dumbly, seemingly unconvinced but unwilling to push the topic any further in fear that you might start sobbing again. He dropped his hands, looking down at them for a moment before he slowly brought them back to the steering wheel. Clearing his throat as he pulled back onto the road, he continued to give you sideways glances as he drove. 

The constant attention made your cheeks burn and you focused on playing with the hem of your sweater. An awkward silence fell over the truck as it roared down the highway, but you kept your eyes on frayed hem in hopes that he might leave it. In fact, you were so absorbed in the fabric that you didn’t realize he was getting off the highway to park under an overpass until he had already done it. As he threw the truck into park again, you started to object but he held a hand up. 

“Hey, I know you’re fine baby but let’s just rest a while. I’m tired, you’re tired, let’s just take a few seconds to breathe before we keep going,” Joel suggested, rubbing your back with his warm hand.  

“Okay,” you whimpered, biting your lip to keep any more tears away. 

“Okay,” he mimicked. 

Joel opened his arms and you crashed into them, greedy for his touch despite the fact that you were ready to kill him back at that gas station. Although it was him who had pissed you off in the first place with his constant hovering, he was also the only person that could calm you down by simply existing. Without even having to be asked, he spread his legs out on the bench and leaned against the door as you straddled him. Pushing your face into his chest and nosing at his neck until he sighed, you let a few more tears slip as you scented him. 

“What’s got you so riled up baby? I know I’ve been breathing down your neck a bit, but did I say something to piss you off? I know I can be an asshole, but you can tell me. Whatever it is, m’sorry sweet girl,” he murmured. 

You swallowed the lump in your throat as you tried to think of a response. What was it that was riling you up so much? For that question, you had no answers. Sure, there was the exhaustion, but that had never bothered you before. Was it the injuries you had accumulated finally coming to bite you in the ass? Was it the fact that Joel had acted as your shadow for four days straight? Maybe it was a little of all of the above, but that didn’t account for the way you looked like you were about to keel over. 

“I honestly don’t know Joel,” you answered truthfully, “I didn’t mean to start anything, I just feel so tired and gross. You were looking out for me, I know that, and now I feel like a burden.” 

A fresh round of tears poured from your tear ducts at the admission, making you shove your face deeper into him to cry against his skin. Joel sucked in a breath and reached up to cup the back of your head with one hand, cradling it as you released all of the pent up emotions. As you cried, he snaked one hand under your shirt to draw circles over your hip, his signature move for times of crisis. Just like always, it worked like a charm. 

Ever so carefully, he pulled your head back, shushing your whines as he began to rub his face over the mark on your neck. You whimpered, allowing him to mark you with his scent until it coated the back of your throat. Joel continued his assault, kissing and nibbling on the sensitive skin until you sagged into him. When you were finally sated, he kept one hand on the small of your back and the other dug into your knotted hair, scritching your scalp as you huffed at his skin. 

“Why would you think that babygirl? You were the one that got us out of that town back there, not me. If anything, this old man is the burden,” Joel joked, trying anything to wipe the frown from your face. 

You laughed a little, feeling his small smile of victory against your cheek.  

“What can I do?,” Joel whispered, unwittingly repeating the words you had said to him just days before. 

You smiled a bit more at that. Mutual support with a partner, as flawed as it may be in practice, was something you had only dreamed about once upon a time. A pipe dream, you had thought. Joel wasn’t perfect, and neither were you, but you were both trying to understand the other. After taking one last hit of his musk through your nose, you leaned back and looked at him. His eyes were full of concern, the worry line between his brows sticking out as he placed his hands on your hips. 

“Need me to back off and give you some space while we’re out? Cus I can’t make any promises darling, but I’ll try. If that’s what you want, I mean,” he continued. 

“I don’t - well, I mean I do want you to back off a bit. But maybe just like, two paces back when we are in a high risk area? That way you don’t knock me over and alert half the fucking neighborhood again,” you teased. 

He smiled and gave a mock salute, “Yes ma’am.” 

The giggle he pulled from you this time was more genuine and it softened some of the built up tension in the truck. The two of you fell into a comfortable silence afterwards, you snuggling deeper into his chest in an attempt to fuse yourself to his skin as you drifted in and out of sleep. It was funny, earlier you wanted him to leave you alone but now you needed him closer. He hummed at your constant readjusting, patient as ever despite the requests to hug you tighter and the way your fingers dug into his skin in return. 

Once you finally found the right position, sat between his legs with your back against his chest and his arms wrapped around you, all of the stress of the day vanished and you were asleep in seconds. However, when the driver’s side door was suddenly thrust open in the dead of night and the both of you were tumbling out of the warmth of the truck, you realized that the position had also worked on the man that was supposed to be keeping watch. Joel groaned as you landed on top of him, his entire upper body squished upon your ungraceful fall to the ground. 

“Freeze! Hands in the air, now!,” a gruff voice commanded. 

In a flash, Joel was reaching for the gun that toppled into the snow beside him but it was kicked away by one of the many beings with glaringly bright flashlights. 

“Not so fast big boy, show me your hands or missy here gets one put right between her eyes,” another voice threatened. 

Joel hesitantly followed their instruction, gesturing for you to do the same as he lifted his hands above his head for the group of strangers to see. You paused, trying to think of a way you could get to the knife that you had shoved inside the waistband of your pants but as one of the assailants noisily cocked their gun, you raised your hands alongside him. The fear that Joel felt was reciprocated by you, the bond making your growing panic ping pong off of eachother until you were both rabid with hormones. The need to protect Joel was so powerful that every movement that wasn’t focused on getting him out of here was painful. 

When you caught his eye, Joel subtly shook his head, as if to warn you against any brash decision. Despite the desire to jump up and rip the face off the man who threatened him, you nodded once in return. There would be no getting out of this if you didn’t remain calm. Schooling your face to match Joel’s signature look of annoyed indifference, you attempted to give off the air of not giving a fuck. He was definitely more natural about it, but yours ended up being so convincing that Joel gave you a slight dip of the head in encouragement. 

“On your feet, let’s go.” 

With your hands up, the faceless guards behind flashlights led you away from the truck and towards town. Despite his mask of indifference, Joel’s eyes bounced around and tried to pick out an escape route. However, if it was much too dark for you to see anything, there was no way Joel would be able to. As the wind blew across the flat ground, kicking up snow and freezing the moisture in the corners of your eyes, it was impossible to see anything that was more than five feet away. 

They walked you for what felt like miles, the air depleting your body of the warmth you had been spoiled with in the truck. The coats, along with the food and other supplies you needed to get to Jackson, were tucked away in the backseat and you prayed that wherever they were taking you was close. Joel stayed right at your side, his arm linked with yours as he trudged through the snow. He didn’t look at you aside from a few glances, too focused on the dangers around him until you finally reached the destination. 

An iron gate was slid open with a squeal, the black material rusted around the edges from years of being subjected to the harsh elements. You grimaced at the sound, whipping your head around to look for any sign of infected that might have heard the high pitched shriek. 

“There’s no infected nearby, the chosen ones and their offerings make sure of it,” someone assured you and you scoffed. 

“Is that so?,” Joel sighed, seemingly as unimpressed by the odd response as you were. 

A laugh came from your right and you glared towards the direction it came from. These people were full blooded dumbasses if they thought there was nothing stumbling around in the dark. Even at the camp you were in for most of your life, the one that was secure against infected for decades until one day it wasn’t, still saw both small and large groups stroll on by. The ones that were working the gate didn’t always engage, sometimes allowing them to pass if they didn’t notice the feast in the distance, but even the more fanatic guards never deluded themselves into thinking they were completely safe from them because of their religious beliefs. 

“The Teacher will protect us with her guidance, she makes sure that those who have been given the gift reunite with the truly wise. We cannot know their paths until we reach full redemption,” came from the other side of the group. 

“Oh fuck,” Joel said under his breath. 

Oh fuck was right. 

-

After taking you inside of the gate, you were shoved into the lobby of some worn down luxury hotel. Wax candles covered nearly every surface, giving the room a warm glow despite the bizarre paintings of a naked older woman that were plastered everywhere. Those ones were the least concerning, as the other ones depicted members of the group dancing with what looked to be infected. 

The residents that milled around were all dressed in strange beige garments that did little to compliment their figures, but you supposed that was the point. Josiah had never implemented a uniform for his group, but there were rules about modesty that everyone was supposed to follow which banished fun colors and anything that showed too much skin. The few omegas that you saw in the lobby were in long dresses that came down to their ankles, the high neck looking like it strangled them as they all sewed and weaved textiles for the group. The rest of the group seemed to be let off easy, with the alphas and betas donning flowier pants and a matching tunic that showcased way too much chest. 

Joel squeezed your hand as you were ushered into a larger room that had once been a ballroom. The room was lined with tables where families chowed down on steaming heaps of food. The smell of freshly cooked stew drifted over from their plates and your mouth watered. The way your stomach growled as you watched a young girl dig into chunks of tender meat was almost unbearable. You averted your eyes, choosing instead to focus on the long table that was placed on the stage. 

A group of serious looking older men and women sat there, all scowling down at you as the guards shoved you forward. The one exception being the woman that sat directly in the middle of them all. She was different from the rest of the group by clothing alone, hers being a deep shade of blue that was in stark contrast to the sea of beige around her. As the community members with guns urged you further into the room, she stood and all of the spoons that scraped bits of food off the inside of bowls were collectively dropped. About a hundred voices were silenced by just the act of her standing up and you gulped, coming to the realization that the woman that stood proudly at the head of the table was the woman that was showcased on every wall. 

“My children, it seems we have newcomers. Can we all give them a warm welcome?,” she called, her voice gentle yet clear in the silence of the room. 

A hundred faces turned to look at Joel and you, their expressions completely somber as they heeded her command with a unified, “Welcome to the Thin Space, where The Teacher helps guide us towards truth.” 

“Oh no, no, no, no, no,” you whispered to no one in particular. 

Yeah, Joel had it right when he balked at the guards at the gate. 

As the faces quickly turned away in search of more instruction, you had an odd sense of deja vu. Looking out into the crowd, you saw quite a few children mixed in with the somber adults and wondered if you would have looked like this to an outsider back at your old camp. Josiah ordered the group to be obedient, to dress modestly, to speak a certain way, to act differently, to pray, and to follow the preacher’s words as law. This, despite its freaky ass twist, just seemed like a different brand of the same shit. Two sides of a fucked up coin that you had finally escaped, just to be pulled right back into it. 

“Bring our guests to the detox ward, then we can meet and go over their paths,” the woman commanded the guards, waving everyone off as she sat back at the head of the table. 

The moment she dropped back down to her seat, the rest of the room returned to eating and it made your stomach roil. Josiah had done that as well, stopping dinners to go on long spiels where he twisted the words of some ancient text to suit his own desires. Sometimes it would go on for hours and by the time he was finished, you were too tired to eat the meager portions that your mother allowed you to have. Most times, you ended up going to bed hungry with half cocked dreams about running away from home swirling through your mind. 

This woman, whoever she was and whatever she desired from her own followers, was no different than him. You felt it in your bones. And as the guards ushered the two of you away, the more bitter part of yourself that still had a bone to pick with Josiah made sure to send her a look that said exactly that. I know what you are, it screamed from across the room. It was a look that earned you a smile from her, a glass of red wine being raised in acknowledgement as you were led into a side hallway that held three bathrooms. The guards bypassed the men’s and women’s changing rooms, coming to a full stop in front of the door that said private. 

“You’ll go in first. Get clean and put on the clothes left out for you. Then come out and he’ll go in,” the man closest to you instructed. 

Joel scoffed, “Yeah, I don’t think so buddy. She stays with me.” 

The man scowled at Joel’s insolence but you were quick on your feet. Before a fight could break out between the two alphas, the both of them already red in the face at the slightest provocation from the other, you jumped in with something you knew would work. If they were anything like the group that haunted your dreams, they wouldn’t let Joel come in unless he held some sort of ownership over you. With the marks on your necks as clear as day, as well as your scents fused together from the bond itself, you knew it wasn’t a bond they were looking for. 

“Please sir, I don’t want to be without my husband. He doesn’t trust me to do these things by myself… You see, I’m so easily confused without him,” you whined, making your voice soft and needy to really drive home the point. 

Joel’s brows shot up in alarm and you shot him a look. Luckily, he managed to get it under control before the others could see. He straightened his back, making himself taller as you cowered under him to add to the effect. The man narrowed his eyes, flitting them back and forth between you and Joel before another guard came to the rescue. 

“We cannot take a husband away from his wife, especially not when she is of the simpler kind. That would only aggravate the both of them before The Teacher can see their true nature for herself,” the woman behind Joel argued. 

The man grunted in affirmation, nodding at you to push the door open before he shoved you in. Joel tumbled in afterwards, cursing as you knocked heads in the small space. 

The door slammed shut and you were shrouded in darkness, the only light being the candle that was half melted against the corner of the sink. A shelf with different types of clothes stacked on it was shoved into the corner, while a bucket of grayish water was placed in the shower. A crusty looking sponge laid next to the bucket and you shuddered at the thought of rubbing it across your body. 

“Okay, what the fuck was that?,” Joel whispered, waving his hands around in the air like some sort of cartoon character. 

You rolled your eyes at him, “I grew up with these types of people Joel. Of course I knew that the marriage card would work, you don’t need to get your panties in a twist.” 

Joel scrunched up his face at that, pinching the bridge of his aquiline nose as he huffed out a frustrated breath. 

“Obviously, I’m not talking about you calling me your husband. We’re mated, why would I care about that? I don’t give a shit, we basically already are married anyways. I’m talking about the freaky deeky fucking cult we just walked into!,” he hissed in response. 

Him likening the two of you to a married couple didn’t go unnoticed but you shoved the poorly timed butterflies away, deciding that now was not the best time to pick at him for answers to questions you weren’t sure you wanted to ask. Instead you nodded, focusing on his panicked response to a group that seemed so foreign to him, yet so familiar to you. 

“I know but if they haven’t killed us yet, they probably have something else in store. It’s best if we go along with it for now, just until we know what type of crazy they are,” you muttered, moving to grab the long and surprisingly itchy dress from the pile. 

Joel grabbed the fabric from your hands, tossing it back onto the shelf as you started to undress. You gave him a pointed look, stepping out of your pants and reaching to grab it again but he intercepted every attempt. 

“Stop it Joel!,” you whispered angrily, softly slapping away his hands in frustration. 

He guffawed, “You can’t be serious right now, you’re going to let them put us in these weird ass get ups?” 

You sighed, grabbing the sides of his face and bringing it closer until his forehead rested against your own. Joel allowed you to do it, although you felt the tension that still bunched all of the muscles in his arms as he gripped your hips a tad too harshly in return. With his emotions running high, you knew that it was best to tread lightly. 

The anxiety you felt in that moment was geared towards the purpose of the group, rather than the group itself. For you, these people were easy to read. Whereas Joel was in a foreign place with strange people that clearly had even stranger beliefs. He was in limbo, while you felt like you were back home for a family visit. Sighing at his outburst, you tried to reason with him. 

“We have no guns, no getaway car, and no idea what we are up against here. But you know what we do have?”

He rolled his eyes and shook his head, “No, what do we have?”

“Me, someone who grew up with people like this. I know these people Joel, just trust me. We need to know what they want, then we can figure out how to leave, okay?,” you asked, waiting patiently for his affirmation. 

He made a disgruntled noise, starting to fight back with a strained, “Well, I don’t know if your upbringing is gonna really help if they -” 

“And we have this,” you continued, holding up the knife you had tucked away. 

Joel’s eyes widened and he snatched it from you, holding it up to the light like he couldn’t believe it was real. He sucked in a deep breath, nodding to himself as his mind worked through the possibilities your hidden treasure unlocked. 

“Good, this is really good darling. We can use this to get out, just have to find the right time,” he muttered, his fingers drumming against his pant leg as the knife lifted him from complete despair. 

You nodded, “I know, so get your damn clothes off and let’s try to fit in with these freaks. Once we know more, you take point and get through as many of them as you can. I’ll grab something and cover you.” 

Joel’s face drifted into shock for a second. The directness of your words surprised him, you could tell by the way his eyes flicked up and down your figure like he was seeing it for the first time. Then he looked almost proud as he nodded in agreement. 

“Well ain’t you full of surprises? Alright troublemaker, I’m game,” he agreed. 

“I try,” you said cheekily. 

After a few loaded seconds where Joel stared at you, analyzing for any sign of hesitation, he finally allowed you to pick up the terrible dress again. He began with begrudgingly taking off his thick flannel, whipping off the white tee he had on underneath before he quickly added his jeans to the pile. The long shirt that they left for him showed off a good chunk of his chest yet was long enough to fall almost to his knees, making him frown as he slipped it over his head. 

Once he had the loose linen pants on, you watched as he tried to shove some of the excess fabric into the waistline to aid in his appearance. It sort of worked, but you couldn’t help but think he looked like was supposed to be in a circle somewhere, poorly playing the bongos as he talked about free love and the best kind of pot to smoke. 

“Hey Joel,” you called out, a cheeky grin tugging at the corners of your lips.  

He stilled his efforts, turning to face you as the dress finally rolled over your thighs. The fabric was tighter than you thought, with the beige material practically strangling you until it randomly got flowy at the knees. Clearly whoever had made this didn’t account for your body shape, as your breasts were pushed into your lungs, making breathing difficult with the pressure. The waist barely fit around the fat on your hips that Joel loved to squeeze, and you had the feeling that a single sneeze would burst the curves from their cruel beige confines. 

“Yeah baby?,” he answered, concern etched into his face as he dropped the hands that fussed at his waistband. 

“Looking far out man,” you teased, giving him a peace sign that made him snort. 

“How in the hell do you know what that means? Fuck it, you know what? All you need is a fucking sleeping cap and a candle, and you’d be the spitting image of Ebeneezer Scrooge. So, take that you dork,” Joel bit back. 

You rolled your eyes, “Jokes on you old man, I’ve got no fucking idea who the hell Ebersneezer Stooge is.” 

“What the fuck did you just call him?,” Joel snickered, groaning about his age when you shrugged in response. 

“Whatever hippy,” you giggled. 

The sound of his muted laughter echoed throughout the room, leading to three solid raps against the door that made you both jump. Joel flicked his eyes towards the entrance before he glanced back at you. A reassuring look was plastered on his face and you tried to mimic it for his sake. Whether you achieved it or not, you couldn’t say. The door being slammed open by the gun toting guards forced you back into a much darker reality, one that didn’t leave time to check on Joel’s feelings. The only consolation you had in the dire situation you found yourself in was the fact that he had the knife hidden somewhere on him, ensuring that he could protect himself if this went sideways. 

“Out, it’s time for you to meet her,” the guard said, urging the two of you out of the room with the barrel of his gun.

Walking through the dingy space, you were led out to a longer, more smokier hallway that was lined with a ridiculous amount of candles and burning herbs. Your nose wrinkled from the smell of incense, tobacco, sweat, weed and blood. The air was thick, weighing down on your chest like it was a living being. Joel sneezed loudly behind you, muttering to himself about new age stoners and hygiene as he grimaced at the state of the place. If the situation had been better, perhaps his grumbling would have made you laugh. But instead, you were tense as the guards led you to the room at the end of the hall that had strange symbols painted across it. Mesmerized by the loopy script that covered every inch of the wood, you took a step closer to examine it. 

Just as you reached it, a guard pushed you back with his forearm, knocking you directly into Joel. He caught you in his arms, barely able to keep his threatening growls to a minimum as he lifted you back on to your feet. Rage simmered off of him, so much so that you felt it when he geared himself up to spit out an insult. Sensing the disaster that brewed in the air, you pressed your spine into Joel’s front, grounding him with the proximity. 

“Breathe baby, eyes on the prize,” you whispered into his ear for good measure. 

Joel’s body remained as taught as can be, but you squeezed his hand in thanks when you felt his jaw click shut. The sound of his angry teeth grinding was never pleasant and would certainly give him a hell of a migraine later, but it was better than the alternative of him being shot for mouthing off at one of them. 

The door opened after the guard knocked twice, revealing another dimly lit room that was filled with half melted candles and reeked of a mix of bodily fluids and incense. There were more paintings pinned to the walls, depicting different scenes with the group and the beings they seemed to revere. It was the one at the center that took you off guard. The painting showed a woman holding a baby in her arms, while an infected person is wrapped around them both, almost as if they were protecting them. 

“Ah, I see you have found our scripture. Beautiful, isn’t it? Nature becomes one again so that the world may heal, that is our truth,” the woman practically sang. 

The guards behind you all made a noise in affirmation, nodding at her words as they waited for orders. 

“Fabian, stay here with me. Elaine and Thomas, go back to your posts, and the rest of you guard the door,” she instructed. 

The door swung shut behind the four that left, leaving Joel and you alone with the woman and her loyal servant. Fabian stood to the side, his hands folded behind his back and his eyes straightforward, looking out into a void as he waited for her signal like some sort of highly trained guard dog. It made you sick. 

“Please, do sit,” she said, gesturing towards one of the couches that had way too many throw pillows and blankets on it. 

Joel went first and you followed, gingerly sitting on the edge of your seat as the woman drifted throughout the room. She grabbed three mugs from a desk in the corner, along with a steaming kettle that filled the room with the smell of citrus and herbs. Placing each cup down on the coffee table, she filled them and gestured for you to take the tea before she took hers. You looked at Joel and nodded towards the cup, motioning for him to follow your lead as you picked it up. 

The smell of the tea, whatever kind it was, was mouth watering and you had a hard time convincing yourself not to drink it. It was only after you watched the woman down half of her cup that you decided it was safe enough. Absolutely parched from the road, you gingerly allowed yourself a small sip. The tea was bursting with different fruit flavors, making you muscle through a moan as your weak stomach was finally soothed by the delicious hot water. 

“Good right? We make that ourselves, along with everything else you see here,” she explained. 

Taking one last big gulp of the drink, you sat the mostly empty cup back down and straightened up. Again, Joel followed your lead and discarded his cup on the coffee table before he sat back. You could feel his concern and reached back to squeeze his thigh, earning a pat to the back of your hand in the process. 

“Interesting,” she smirked. 

You cocked an eyebrow at her, “What’s interesting?” 

“The dynamic between you two is interesting, I’d like to know more,” she answered. 

Joel scoffed and you narrowed your eyes at her. That statement sounded like a slight but to which party? You weren’t entirely sure. Clearly, Joel thought it was himself that had been insulted because he quickly started in on a defense. 

“With all due respect ma’am, I’m not -”

Fabien was over in a flash, smacking Joel against the back of his head with a rolled up newspaper like he was some sort of abused dog. You shot up out of your seat, placing your hands on Fabien’s chest to push him back in return. The loyal servant stumbled back, glaring at you before he stepped forward to strike again, but the woman raised her hand in the air. Upon seeing her hand raised, Fabien went back to his job as a statue. 

“That’s enough Fabien, they are new. They don’t know our rules,” she crooned. 

“One is not to speak to The Teacher unless The Teacher speaks to you,” Fabien answered coolly, almost like he was reading from a script. 

She nodded and raised her eyebrow at Joel, refilling all of the cups once more before she leaned back against the cushions. Bringing her feet up from the floor and wrapping herself in a blanket, you suddenly felt like it was you two who were intruding on her day. Despite your growing frustration at the situation, she was as cool as a cucumber. 

“I was talking to her, the guard dog will get his turn soon enough,” she said to Joel. 

You balked and looked at him, noticing how blotches of redness bloomed across his cheekbones from the slight. Despite the urge to comfort him, you looked back towards the woman and responded for the both of you. 

“Sure, maybe our dynamic is weird to some people but why would I talk to you about it? I don’t know who you are or what you want from us,” you argued. 

Taking a sip of her drink, she mulled it over a second. Joel sighed in annoyance, with his patience for the situation already growing slim, and you grabbed his hand, squeezing it three times to calm him down. He was right, what she was doing WAS incredibly annoying. She was playing with you two, pretending to think things over before she gave the answers she had already thought up beforehand. You knew it and Joel knew it, but you had to stay calm. 

“My name is Aspen, but my group has taken to calling me The Teacher. You may call me whatever you wish to, it is not up to me to decide how I am labeled,” she explained. 

You raised an eyebrow at that, “And what is it that you teach them exactly?” 

Aspen smiled then, gesturing to the paintings around her with bright eyes. Her smile was wide, showcasing a clean set of teeth with long canines that put you on edge. The wrinkles on her face were few, yet her hair was completely gray. You couldn’t tell if she was 60 or 85 and every second that passed only made you more unable to figure it out. 

“This place,” she said while holding her hands out wide, “Is the Thin Place. It is the one place on earth where our world and theirs come together, creating a thin space for us to reside in until we may all be one again.” 

Looking at all of the paintings around you, a funny feeling began to bloom in your chest. Maybe this group was a bit different than yours afterall. To quell the nerves that beaded sweat along your hairline, you picked up the cup and chugged it down. Scenes of infected dancing with humans, bringing them into their horde before turning them made your stomach flip. Along with the more brutal scenes of people being strapped down before being bled, their blood gifted to the growing horde as some sort of offering. And one of the main paintings, the sick piece with a woman birthing a baby, only to allow herself and her child to be coddled by an infected man. 

“And how,” you cleared your throat, “How do you do that? How do you make the two worlds come together?” 

Aspen chuckled, “All in good time my child, you will know when the truth is revealed.”

Joel huffed out a breath and rubbed his eyes, unable to stop himself from grumbling at her response. She narrowed her eyes at him, examining his face in a way that made you want to shield him from her gaze. It was like he was a piece of meat, her tongue running over her gleaming teeth as she raked her eyes up and down his form. 

“And what is it that you have to say sir? Please, we’re all friends here,” she declared. 

Joel huffed out a laugh, “How ‘bout you cut the shit and tell us why we’re here, hm? Cus with all due respect ma’am, I’m not buying what it is you’re selling. If I need God, my mama raised me in a church, I know where to find him. Until then, I’m good.”

Aspen laughed, a shrill and grating sound that had you wincing as Joel shifted uncomfortably beside you. Looking over, it seemed she was getting to him too as sweat had begun to dampen his tunic. The light of the room shined down on his face, making him look almost ethereal for a moment and you had the strange urge to lick him but ignored it. Instead, you watched as he gulped down his second cup of tea and placed it next to yours. As he leaned back, Joel’s hands came up to rub at his eyes and you couldn’t help but notice how the hair on his arm moved as though there was a breeze in the room. It was strange, you had never looked too closely at the dark curls smattered across his forearms before but now they were all you could see. 

“I’m not talking about God. I’m talking about the only truth in this world,” she explained, standing up and walking over to the paintings to point at what she meant. 

“Th-the infected?,” you asked, feeling a little dizzy as you tried to understand what she was trying to say. 

Aspen hummed, “Yes, only a select few are chosen as an offering to them. Once they are given the gift, they will know the truth of the world. And us, their humble servants, will be rewarded with a feast. That is, until the messiah comes to bring us all together.” 

Joel giggled beside you and you turned, noticing how your vision stuttered before finally focusing on his face. His head was laid against the back of the couch, a lazy smile on his face as he laughed at something that you couldn’t see. Leaning forward, you cupped his cheek and tried to bring his face forward but it only slumped back the moment you let go. He laughed again and your heart sank. 

“You - you drugged us,” you choked out. 

The room was stifling, making you sweat as the walls swelled and shrunk with each breath you took. As Joel continued to giggle, you scooched closer to him, seeking the comfort of his body despite the fact that his mind was in lala land. Gripping his arm and sliding up next to him, you pressed yourself against his side and tried to focus on the woman in front of you. 

“Your fingers are pretty baby, way prettier than mine,” Joel mumbled, laughing softly to himself as he played with your digits. 

You let him do it, too busy trying to pull yourself out of the nightmare you found yourself in. Everytime you focused on something for too long, it would slowly get warped until it was almost unrecognizable. The only thing that grounded you was Joel’s hands pulling your fingers up to his face, examining them with so much scrutiny that you were worried he was going to strain his eyes. 

“A part of stepping into the next part of life is forgetting this one. In order to cleanse you of the toxins of this world, you’ve drunk the tea along with me. Now, the ceremony can begin,” Aspen said excitedly, reaching forward to ring the bell. 

“What ceremony? What? What the fuck is happening?,” you cried out, ripping your hands from Joel as the guards at the door barged in. 

Joel whined at the loss but you ignored him. Instead, you shot up and stood before him, ready to fend off the guards as they crept closer. It was hard to tell how far away they were, as your depth perception and internal clock was all off. One moment the men were standing menacingly in the doorframe, the next moment one of them was lifting you over his shoulder. You screeched, uselessly pounding against the man’s back as he carried you away from the room but it felt like you were fighting someone while locked in a dream. The punches you landed were weak, almost laughable, but you still tried to squirm your way back to Joel. 

The blood rushed to your head, gorging your brain with the thick liquid and making you even dizzier as the guard carried you out into the hallway. Just as the edges of your eyes began to darken, signaling that the drug was starting to pull you into a deep sleep, you heard Joel call out from the other room. 

“Wha-? Whas - What’s happening? Where’d she go?!” 

That was the last thing you heard before passing out. 

- Joel - 

Joel’s head felt heavy as he lounged on the couch, playing with the fingers of his sweet girl while she talked to some lady. He didn’t remember getting to a safe place but maybe it was because he was so sleepy. As they conversed about things that were beyond his understanding, he brought her fingers up to look at them. 

Compared to his, they were so small. The skin was relatively unscarred, save for a few nicks and scrapes that would likely heal over in a few days. The only thing he was unsure about was the wrist. He grimly remembered shoving it back into place by himself after he found you and upon closer inspection, it looked relatively straight but the bruising was still pretty bad. Still, Joel couldn’t help but worry, especially with how the dark spots seemed to grow and shrink with every passing second. That couldn’t possibly be healthy. He giggled as the bruise shrunk again. What do I know, he thought, I’m not a fucking doctor.

Leaving the wrist behind, he returned to your fingers. They were the same digits that played with his hair until he fell asleep, the same ones that cupped his jaw and traced the scars on his chest, the same ones that brought him toe curling pleasure just days before, the same ones that did brutal things just to see to his freedom. He loved these hands and he loved you. Warmth filled his chest and the world got brighter as the euphoria he felt because of his love for you bled into his vision. 

“Your fingers are pretty baby, way prettier than mine,” Joel mumbled, continuing to move the digits around in his grasp. 

Turning his head for a moment, you were still engaged in the conversation you were having with the woman. Joel tried to wrack his brain for any elderly friends you had mentioned but couldn’t think of anyone other than Miriam and Rachel. Was she one of them? No, Joel thought, she couldn’t be either of them. They were dead, you had watched them die yourself. When his brain couldn’t conjure up an answer to the question, he let it go and watched you speak to the mystery woman. 

The way your skin glowed was breathtaking. Sweat dampened your hair,  making it look like it was encrusted with jewels. Everything about you screamed Goddess and Joel had a hard time not breaking into tears of joy. He always felt this way, like he was a mere mortal and you were the sun shining down on his face but in this moment, in the funny smelling room where he held your hands in his, it was overwhelming. The radiant woman that sat against his side was his mate and he couldn’t believe it. To keep himself from crying in front of the stranger he couldn’t place, and not wanting to embarrass you in front of your friends, Joel returned to examining your fingers again. 

Although, he was surprised when they were suddenly torn from his grasp and he whined at the loss. Joel’s vision went fuzzy for a second, the colors in the room swirling as his head buzzed with an unbelievable amount of pressure. He squinted, trying to figure out what was going on as the voices around him turned more urgent. By the time he managed to blink away the stars in his eyes, you were gone. 

Joel gasped, looking around the room with increasing urgency when you were nowhere to be found. Instead, all he saw was your friend talking in a low voice to another stranger. The man she was talking to looked familiar and he tried to remember how he knew him. Was he one of Sarah’s teachers? He kinda looked like the art teacher she liked that always smelled a bit like weed. Joel never said anything about it, preferring that his pup have a pothead for a teacher rather than a drunk. And plus, an art teacher smoking a joint in between classes was practically a cliche. Yes, he thought, this had to be him. Nobody else in Texas would be dressed like that. 

It took a few seconds of wondering why he was hanging out with Sarah’s art teacher, but he slowly remembered that his daughter was gone. And not just that, Sarah had been dead since his 32nd birthday, which was twenty four years ago. If that man, by some miracle, was still alive, he would be grayer than Joel by now. After a flash of a memory that involved him tumbling out of a truck and a gun being shoved into his mate’s face presented itself, the reality of the situation came back to him. 

“Wha-? Whas - What’s happening? Where’d she go?!,” Joel asked, his heart beginning to beat harder as he realized his words were slurred. 

When Joel locked eyes with the woman across from him, it clicked. The truck, the hotel, the clothing swap, the meeting and finally, the tea. The two of you had been drugged by this woman. This was not his first experience with drugs by a mile, both recreationally and in similar situations such as these, however this was the first time he was stupid enough to drug himself. Usually whoever did the drugging was less sneaky, stabbing him with a needle or shoving a bitter smelling cloth under his nose to knock him out. But this was different, these drugs weren’t meant to knock him out. 

Tommy had convinced him, about forty years ago, to take acid with him at a Pink Floyd concert that he had snuck out of his parent’s house for. He remembered standing in the crowd, his mouth wide open as he looked at all the lights that dazzled and dizzied him. The crowd danced and sang around him, Tommy even got into the center of the floor to pull some moves on a cute guy that was giving him the eyes, but Joel was stuck in place. He couldn’t take his eyes off the lights that bounced off the crowd. As he remembered how your face had glowed, shining in the candlelight like it was the sun itself, he quickly drew the connection and realized that he had been given a hallucinogen. 

“D-drugged us? Umpf - why?,” he managed to get out, his tongue feeling like a dead weight in his mouth. 

Aspen slunk over, shushing him as she kneeled at his feet. Joel straightened up, feeling uncomfortable at the way she clasped his upper thighs under her talons. The only person he wanted anywhere near where she was touching him was you. She smiled at his attempts to get away, reveling at his discomfort for a bit longer before she granted him space by leaning back on her heels. 

“You sir, are special. The chosen comes to us as someone who is closed off to any truth except for the one before themselves. They do not seek the answers we do, which is why they must learn the ultimate truth,” Aspen carefully explained. 

Joel made a noise of impatience, squirming as he tried to will his limbs to cooperate. He didn’t give a shit about whatever crap she had to say about being chosen or ultimate truths. All he cared about was where the fuck you had gone. 

“Where is she?,” he grunted, straining all of his muscles to lift himself into a shaky standing position. 

She stood from her place on the floor, so close to him that he could smell the way her scent was marred with something foul. It was a scent he had smelled many times on himself. Joel had noticed the aroma of blood that tainted the air when he walked in, but this was something more. This was the acrid smell of death itself. 

“The chosen is an offering, he will learn the truths of the world. For his sacrifice, we are rewarded with enough sustenance to sustain us until the next pair are found. She shall sustain us,” she sighed, gliding back over to the man by the door. 

Cannibals. These people were fucking cannibals, and not just the run of the mill cannibals that were scattered around the world. Joel had been alive long enough to encounter the groups of people who were led by desperation to feast on the flesh of others until they could finally take down another deer. He understood those people, even empathized with their plight. Hell, he had been one of those people before, when a hard winter forced the hand of the humans left trying to survive a few years after the outbreak. 

These people were not the same. They sacrificed bonded pairs, deluding themselves into thinking that if they gave one to the infected that they deserved to eat the other. His stomach panged, the tea he swallowed rising to his throat as the world swirled around him. He gagged, fear and disgust pushing the small amount of sustenance he had in his stomach to his mouth. 

Slapping a hand down on the side of the couch, Joel spewed watered down chunks of vomit against the ground. Hands that were too cold to be yours rubbed his back, making him puke even more until he couldn’t possibly release any more bile. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Joel turned back to Aspen and her servant. 

“You’re fucking sick,” he spat. 

Aspen smiled, “You’ll see soon. Once the truth is revealed to you, this will all make sense.” 

Rage prickled at his skin, sobering him a bit as he took in the entirety of what Aspen was saying to him. There was no way he was letting them toss him to a horde, only to celebrate afterwards with a quick bite of you. Joel focused on the heavy weight of the forgotten weapon he had tucked into the fabric of his pants. All he needed was the right moment and he could lean forward, slicing the carotid in Aspen’s throat with a quick flick of the wrist so that he could enjoy the warm spray of her blood against his face. The drugs intensified every emotion he felt, especially the bloodlust he had for an adversary worth killing. He was practically frothing at the mouth while he imagined it. 

The corners of Aspen’s mouth turned downwards, her eyes widening slightly at Joel’s reaction to her plans. He smirked in return, picturing all the ways he could destroy her as her face alternated between warped and clear with every blink. Joel could practically taste her fear and he wanted more. She breathed in sharply through her nose, hardening the expression on her face as she called out to her guards. 

“Come, take him for preparation. I’ve had enough of his ignorance, we must teach him before it’s too late,” Aspen called out. 

Two guards came in, their faces distorted as they walked over. As they made their way to Joel, he couldn’t help but notice the way their shadows danced along the wall. The contrast of the dark figures against the cream colored walls was enough to make his mind spin. However, as hands latched on to his arms and shoved him forward, he was forced to remember what he was gearing up to do. As they yanked him out of the room, with Joel stumbling along as he tried to think of an escape, Aspen called out to him. 

“Bless you for being the chosen my child, your sacrifice will allow us to keep going for another winter. The death of the chosen one, along with the reward you have brought with you, will not be forgotten,” she promised. 

Reward? She thought that killing you was a fucking reward? Joel felt every muscle in his body pull taught against the scratchy fabric, a flush growing up the side of his neck as he chewed at the inside of his mouth. The guards managed to finally pull him out into the hall, shoving him towards whatever preparation area they had for him, but Joel wasn’t worried about the secondary location. He needed a moment alone with the freaks that had been threatening him and his mate for far too long. He needed it like he needed air. 

It didn’t matter that the floor looked like the surface of the ocean, even forming ripples with every step he took. It didn’t matter that the effects of the drug were blurring the lines, making him rabid as he thought of the most gruesome ways to take care of his enemies. It didn’t matter that you were in a different room, going through God knows what while he was being led towards death. None of it mattered. Joel wasn’t dying today and neither were you. It was everyone else that was fucked and they didn’t even know it. The fates of everyone who got in his way was getting more solidified with every step of the way. 

The guards led him to the back of the building, stopping before a maintenance door to unlock it. Joel breathed in deeply, noting how there was a distant smell of you drifting from somewhere nearby. You were close, so close that the slightest hint of peppermint and lavender hung in the air. He reared his head back, looking around for any sign of his mate. 

There was nobody else lingering in this side of the hotel, yet the sight of a glass door marred with unfamiliar symbols stirred something within him. As the man to his right gripped his shoulders harshly, using all of his might to push against the wall of muscle that was his backside, Joel swore he could hear your voice. He wasn’t sure if it was the drugs, the bond, or the love he felt, but he knew you were behind that door. 

“Get - oomph - get in there you big oaf,” one of the guards panted, finally managing to force Joel into the room. 

Joel stumbled in, catching himself on one of the industrial sized washing machines that lined the walls of the room. Piles of discarded clothes were everywhere, with every piece of beige clothing reeking of the rancid smell of terror. One of the guards shut the door behind them, making sure to lock it for good measure. They thought they were locking Joel in with them but it was the other way around, they were locked in there with him. 

“Take off your clothes, there will be no need for them in the next life,” the man closest to him instructed. 

Chuckling to himself, Joel shook his head and answered with a simple, “No.” 

That seemed to anger them, the smaller one pushing off of his place by the door to stalk over. They were both younger men, too green to see how cornering a rabid beast may get them hurt. As the space between Joel and the guards grew smaller, he focused on stilling the waves in his vision so that he could strike. 

“If you don’t want to take it off, we shall take it off for you,” the larger man sneered, taking one miscalculated step forward to grab Joel’s collar. 

Fingers grasped at the fabric, pulling it half an inch from his skin before they abruptly let go. Instead, they were pulled back to uselessly cover a gash that sprayed blood onto everything in sight. The guard gurgled out a protest and swung with his free hand, sending a weak punch towards Joel that he easily ducked. Stumbling forward, the larger man was already dead before his partner had a chance to draw his weapon. 

The remaining guard fumbled with the strap on his holster, giving Joel the perfect chance to slam him to the ground. A whine crawled out of his throat, muffled by Joel’s palm clamped over his mouth. A sharp sting came from the man biting him but he ignored it, suddenly mesmerized by the way the red stains of blood on the man’s face danced across his sallow skin. 

“Stop,” Joel mumbled to the squirming guard, putting more weight on the hand that shoved his face into the floor. 

A crack and a muffled scream resounded in the room, causing Joel to shudder at the sound. The mirage was shattered, replaced by a sickening reality where he was crouched over a man who groaned in pain from his jaw being shifted about three inches to the right. 

“Oh fuck,” Joel mused, huffing in amusement at his own blunder. 

The man hissed a garbled response, something about him being fucking crazy, but it was cut off by a knife slicing through vocal chords. Another misting of blood found Joel, baptizing him in the torment he caused with his own hands. He wanted to linger, to see if those dancing streaks would return again as the man took his last breaths, but he shook himself from the fog that clouded his judgment. 

Lifting himself from the floor, Joel stumbled towards the door and tore it open. The walls of the hallway shivered as he ping ponged off of them, trying desperately to keep himself upright even though his legs felt like wet spaghetti. All he needed was to think of you, his mate, possibly in danger at the other end of the hallway and he was using all of his might to overpower the effects of the tea. As he came to the opaque door, panting from the effort, he smelled it again. 

Lavender and peppermint, the scent that he would know anywhere. One that had mingled with his, creating a soft undertone to your scent that was all him. And one that was now bitter with fear and overpowered by the smell of death. Unsure of what he was about to see, Joel held his breath as he opened the door. 

- You - 

The candles that lined the pool dripped down the edges, creating piles of goopy wax along around the shallow end. The deep end however, that was where the wax got lost in the impressive layer of thickened blood that coated the bottom of it. As you lay strapped to a wooden table, your whole body tilted with the way the floor was slanted, all you could think about was how many people had been in the exact position. By the looks of it, a fuck ton. 

Women buzzed around you, covering your nude body in fragrant oils and soothing herbs, all while they boasted about how lucky you were for The Teacher choosing you. It was enough to make you barf. And you had, twice already. Each time made you feel slightly clearer but the waves in your vision never quite went away, along with the vibrancy of every color. 

At first you were outraged, having never taken any drugs other than a few hits of a joint that the older kids had shared with you and Jake behind the chapel. Now, it was just annoying to be incapacitated in such an inconvenient way. Although your mind was clearer, your limbs were weighed down against the wood. Even if you could get away, there was no telling whether you would be able to run. The only hope you had was Joel. 

“She looks perfect, my children. A beautiful reward for our offering. The others have taken her mate through the preparation, his ascension should come at any moment now,” Aspen’s voice called out, echoing around the abandoned swimming pool. 

The women all bowed to her, hurrying to their places along the wall as their leader descended the steps and drifted over to you. Her breasts were bare, painted in more symbols that held no meaning to anyone outside of the group, while her waist was covered by a blue skirt that flowed behind her. A long knife was strapped to her hip, bouncing with every step she took. The closer she got, the more blood you smelt and you realized that the paint they used for everything was not in fact paint. 

“I knew there was something about you, something that was begging to be unleashed, and now look where we are,” she sighed dreamily, brushing the hair from your face in an almost loving gesture. 

You tried to scooch back but couldn’t, not with the leather that strapped you down to the wood. 

“Why?,” you hissed, squirming uselessly. 

She hummed, “Why have they chosen me to be the one that speaks for them? Why has your mate been chosen to know their truth, while we all must wait for the messiah to understand? Why do people have to die? There is no one answer my child, it just is.”

The answer unnerved you, forcing you to freeze the attempts at escaping despite the fact that you were quivering with fear. This woman was crazy, completely deranged in her own self made delusions that she could speak to fungus controlled beings. Joel was right to worry about these people. 

Josiah had believed in a social hierarchy, one that left you at the bottom and everyone who presented differently above. And you never questioned his devotion to his backwards beliefs about marriage, modesty, or correct social norms. However, as far as the actual religion went, he was mostly just using it as a backbone to prop up the bullshit he wanted to advertise. Christianity was just a tool to propel himself forward, landing him a role as leader and preacher in a world that was primed for someone to take advantage of people. 

Paul’s group was different in action, but they also held similarities to Josiah’s. They strictly enforced a hierarchy that cherished only the group of alphas on the in, mowing down any possible competition for the crown with the arena. Meanwhile, your kind were used and discarded. Only the unlucky ones were kept. Violence was the tool Paul used and boy, was he good at it. However, his purpose was the same; to propel himself forward off the backs of others. 

Aspen was not like either of them. 

“J-Joel, my m-mate -,” you stammered, working hard against the effects of the tea. 

She clicked her tongue, “He knows what we cannot, they have taken him as one of their own by now. And you shall be our reward for the offering.” 

Aspen’s hand cupped your cheek, making you wince at the smell of stale blood that lingered under her fingernails. 

“You will have the most tender meat, the well loved ones always do,” she cooed. 

You balked, “What the fuck?” 

As the women that had lathered your body circled around the table, holding hands as they began to chant in a foreign language, you saw how devoted each of them were to this cause. It would have been fascinating, if you weren’t being inducted as their next meal. And as to Joel’s ascension? You weren’t sure what exactly that entailed, but it didn’t sound good. 

Aspen floated around the room, making odd screeching and clicking noises that resembled her supposed gods as she lifted the knife in the air. They all screeched, the sound of it piercing your ear drums for a few seconds before it suddenly stopped. The women let go of each other's hands, turning to march straight into the deep end of the pool. Dipping their hands in the muck, they smeared blood across their bodies while continuing to mumble the words they had been taught. Aspen cried out, ordering them back with a single noise. 

They turned back towards you, surrounding the table in a way that had you sweating. Aspen kissed each one of them as they stepped forward, the gesture almost like a blessing before they pressed their bloody hands against your body. By the time they were finished, every inch of your skin was covered in the semi-congealed mess. 

“To your places, it is time,” she bellowed, forcing all that had marked you to scramble back to their place along the wall. 

Tears stung your eyes, threatening to spill over onto your blood soaked face as the rotted smell reached your nostrils. The fear had grown into an all out panic as Aspen approached the table. Joel wasn’t going to make it, you were going to die here. Was it because he was dead? You hoped not. 

Of all the ways to die, becoming food for a group of freaks had never crossed your mind. You could think of a million other ways you had fretted over, this had never once made the list. 

“Please,” you whimpered. 

Aspen sighed, bringing one hand to your chest and the other to your belly to ground you. Her hands were cold and only worked to sober you even more to the impending doom you faced. 

“Hush now child, you will be remembered by the Thin Place as heroes. Your mate has ascended to take his place and you shall sustain our -” 

She stopped her speech, lifting her hands from your body as her eyes flicked up to meet yours. The intensity of her gaze made you raise an eyebrow, confused at her sudden hesitation. 

“What?,” you asked meekly. 

Carefully, Aspen laid her hand back down against your belly and leaned forward. She placed her ear against your lower abdomen, making you squirm in discomfort at the proximity to your more intimate parts, but she quickly shot up again. 

“It is her, she is the one who carries him for us,” she announced. 

Excited whispers and hushed squeals of eagerness filled the air. Aspen smiled brightly at you, reaching forward to unclasp one of your hands. 

“I had begun to have my doubts, but you have come! Your mate has ascended but all is well, he shall return to you once the babe is born. The connection between worlds will be complete through the son, he will show us the truth of his father’s kind,” Aspen prattled on. 

“The - The what?!,” you sputtered. 

Just then, the door whipped open with such force that the glass on the top half of it shattered as it smacked against the wall. Joel stumbled in, looking delirious yet hellbent as he zoned it on you. Blood covered nearly every inch of him, making you whimper in fear. How badly wounded had he been wounded to cause that much blood?

“You motherfuckers!,” he roared, sprinting towards the shallow end at full speed. 

He skidded to a stop on the side, leaping down only to be confronted by one of the women. Joel didn’t hesitate, mowing her down the second she lept in his way. The woman dropped and another took her place, quickly being disposed of by the vengeful spirit that had possessed your mate. 

“STOP! YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND! SHE WILL SAVE US ALL!,” Aspen screeched. 

You cringed at the older woman’s poor choice of words. She couldn’t possibly understand the fire she had lit under Joel’s ass with her plea. 

The fury in Joel doubled, with the memory of someone else who had been strapped to a different table setting off the alarm bells in his mind. As chaos ensued, you reached down and groggily undid the rest of the straps. The second you were freed, you moved to get up from the wood but were stopped by Aspen. Tears were in her eyes as she grasped your shoulders in desperation, shaking them back and forth in an effort to lift you from the fog of confusion.  

“Please,” she cried, “This is the key to saving everyone, he needs to ascend before it’s too late.” 

Your mind remained blank. No matter how hard you tried, not a single thought came to aid in your response to the sobbing woman. The only thoughts you were able to conjure up were terrifying, with a million unanswered questions starting a dull throb in the center of your brain. Was it possible? Of course it was, Joel had been cumming inside of you for months. Was it true? You had no idea. 

“Please you need t-”

Aspen’s pleas were cut off when Joel rammed a knife into the side of her neck, effectively ending whatever she had to say about babes and messiahs. Watching as she scrabbled at her neck, you did nothing but stare. The effects of the tea were muted by the shock of Aspen’s words, making her death seem almost surreal as Joel ripped the blade from her. She fell to the floor, giving one last pained wheeze before she stilled for good. 

“Darling, hey, hey, it’s me,” Joel said, cupping your face in his hands. 

You wanted to poke fun at his reassurances. Of course it was him, you had watched Joel run in here and tear through the group. Who else would it be? That would’ve reassured him, perhaps even earned a laugh, but you remained mute. Studying his ridiculously long eyelashes as he nervously examined your face, you tried hard not to look him directly in the eye. If you did look at him, you were worried that all of the things Aspen had said would come pouring out of your mouth. 

Joel brought his head down to knock against yours, sighing as he tried needlessly to reassure you that everything would be okay. He whispered sweet words in hopes of soothing you, but it was pointless, you were already calm. So calm that you felt untethered from reality. The drugs mixed with the shock and you ended up tuning out for most of what Joel was saying. After letting him frantically check you for the source of blood, he put it together that it wasn’t yours all by himself and gently lifted you from the table. Normally, you would protest his babying, but you were barely present as he stomped out off the pool deck. 

The next few minutes blurred together and suddenly, you were being lifted onto the back of a horse and riding out into the night. Hugging Joel tightly, you buried your face into his back to shield yourself from the wind and tried to remember what had happened. Aspen had made her announcement, Joel had mowed down her followers, he had carried you out, and then nothing. 

You had a vague memory of him killing other people, the blurred faces of two guards who jumped out from around a corner during the escape flashing in your mind. Despite the hallucinogens that kept his eyes glossy, you remembered how Joel’s brute strength had allowed him to beat the two men into the ground with his bare fists. His movements were erratic rather precise, his tact seeming to be to overwhelm his victims and use their surprise to end them. You watched the display, too soaked up in your own thoughts to aid, yet unable to look away from the more menacing side of Joel. It was a side to him that you found oddly comforting. 

It was also a side that was in sharp contrast to the man that picked you back up and backtracked to the closet to reclaim your lost clothes. Muttering angrily about Aspen and her women stripping you of the tight dress, he carefully wiped as much blood and oil as he could from your body before he redressed you. 

Once Joel was fully dressed himself, you leaned up against the wall, rubbing at your chest to calm the erratic beats while he stuck his head out of the door. After seeing it was clear, you remembered that he had scooped you up again, but the rest of the escape was too distorted to understand. It was fine, you weren’t sure you wanted to know the details anyways. There were bigger things for you to worry about. 

“I’ve got ya honey, don’t worry. S’okay, we’re gonna be just fine,” Joel called over the wind, kicking the horse in the sides to start a gallop. 

His comfort did little to help you but you hugged him tighter, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck to satiate his own nerves. As the horse tore through the night, taking you further and further away from the remainder of Aspen’s followers, you couldn’t help but think of what she had said. The baby, those two words rang in your ears until a migraine began to bite at the backs of your eyelids. 

Wincing from the ache, you closed your eyes and snuggled closer to the broad expanse of Joel’s warm back. He squeezed your arm in response, a brief moment of comfort amidst the chaos, before he returned them to the reins. As the night wore on, you focused on the sound of hoofs taking you away from danger, trying desperately not to think of the dangers that the future may hold. 

- Joel - 

Two more days of living rough, huddled together at night inside of a former auto shop and even a tool shed to withstand the elements. Two more days of him watching you pick at the measly portions he was able to scrounge up. Two more days of him babbling to himself in hopes that you might finally speak up. Two more days of Joel anxiously hugging you tightly as you pretended to sleep beside him. It had been two days of hell for him. 

The first night, he had given you a pass. He didn’t sleep either. With the drugs still swirling in his bloodstream and the adrenaline of the escape making his heart thump painfully hard in his chest, Joel had finally directed the horse into a former auto shop. After clambering off the horse and stumbling through a rudimentary inspection of the place, he jogged back outside to pull the horse in through the half opened garage door. You were slumped over in the seat, gripping the sides of the leather to keep yourself from sliding to the ground. He understood the feeling, for the past hour his head had felt like it was weighed down by a ton of bricks. 

Easing you off the seat, Joel had thrown you over his shoulder and led the horse in through the tight opening. After closing the bay doors as gently as he possibly could, he patted the stallion’s side before walking through the shop to get to the office in the back. The air was stale there, with the dust particles tickling his nostrils, but the door had a lock and the loveseat shoved in the corner would be comfortable enough to ride out the rest of the effects together.  

For the next four hours Joel had held you in his lap, rubbing your back and leaving the occasional kiss to soothe the both of you as the drugs left your bodies. The dead weight slumped against him was almost enough to convince him that you were asleep, but he was too attuned to you to be fooled. Your breathing was quicker than usual, a dead giveaway that you were still keyed up to let yourself fall into a slumber. He let you pretend anyways.  

When the morning came, Joel had even pretended to wake you. He whispered soft greetings in your ear, kissing your cheek gently until you hummed in acknowledgement. After a hazy smile was sent his way, a tiny bit of the weight on his chest was lifted. Perhaps you would be okay. Maybe you just needed the night to come to terms with everything that had happened. 

“How do you feel honey? Are ya alright? I know that must’ve been scary for you,” Joel asked, fussing over the errant strands that clung to your face.  

“I’m fine Joel. It was just a lot is all, are you okay?,” you answered sweetly. 

He hummed, “I’m okay, was just worried ‘bout you. Drugs can be fun but not like that. That was… Not the best place for you to try ‘em for the first time. 

A devious smile had graced your lips, easing more tension from between his shoulder blades. 

“God Joel, what do you take me for? That wasn’t my first time trying drugs, I’ve smoked weed before. Definitely my first time doing that kind of stuff though. Can’t say I’m a fan,” you joked. 

The pair of you had laughed and once again, Joel was deluded into thinking that you would be okay. But that’s not how life worked, not in his experience anyways. An entire day passed with you glued to his back on the horse, completely silent as he followed the trails to the best of his memory. At first he thought it was you being tired and he said nothing, allowing you to doze if that’s what you needed. Nevertheless, as the day wore on and you remained locked within yourself, he began to ramble about anything and everything to fill the silence that suffocated him. 

During his time as a smuggler, Joel had always preferred his counterparts to say as little as possible to him. That’s why he and Tess worked so well together, she understood that he liked space. But he wasn’t a smuggler anymore and you weren’t his accomplice, you were his mate. Joel couldn’t stand the silence, it felt like it was filled with nothing but impending doom. Like at any moment you were going to turn around and tell him you were leaving him. Distant memories of Sarah’s mother standing over her crib, apologizing to him through tears before she left for good, plucked at his oversensitive nerves. Joel clenched his jaw, working hard to not let his memories of that woman distort the situation. You weren’t her. 

Still, Joel couldn’t help bemoaning the fact that you were supposed to be the one talking his ear off. As someone who wasn’t great with words, he loved the fact that you were a storyteller. Before he had taken you for the first time, before he finally allowed himself to indulge in the woman that plagued his every thought, you had charmed him with the way you spoke. 

Joel would come back from whatever bogus job he made up to keep the distance, make a meal for the two of you, and then he would sit and listen to every thought that ran through that pretty little head. He was almost jealous of your ability to make anything seem interesting and it made him want to get better at it. And now, with your mind a million miles away, it seemed his rusty sociable skills were being tested. 

By the time Joel stopped for the second night, you weren’t even pretending to listen to him anymore. He knew he wasn’t being particularly interesting, prattling on about a job he had done in Austin nearly thirty years ago, but he was slowly running out of memories to help pull you from the abyss. And usually, when his words failed him or came out entirely wrong, you were the one that swooped in to save the conversation. This time that didn’t happen and he was forced to awkwardly rush through a tedious speech on the importance of applying the finish to a deck equally to protect the wood. 

While Joel talked, he formed the most rudimentary bed anyone had ever made with tarps and fishing nets. Meanwhile, you stared at the walls, so checked out that he had to practically drag you into the makeshift nest when it was time to go to sleep. When he had finally curled himself around you, holding you close to preserve body heat while the night passed, Joel decided to push the issue. 

“Honey, are ya alright? You’ve been mighty quiet today and well… If you’re feeling a certain way about what went down, I’d like it if you talked to me about it. I - I mean, we could work through it ya know,” Joel whispered, rubbing every inch of skin he could reach to calm you. 

There was no response at first but he knew you heard him. The way you tensed against his body was enough of an indicator. He waited, allowing you a moment to collect your thoughts before pushing you to speak. Just as Joel was about to press it again, willing to face a wrath if he must, you spoke up. 

“M’okay baby, I’m just tired and I still don’t feel very well,” you mumbled against his chest, looking up to press your chapped lips to his in thanks. 

The sickness that had come over you while on the trip to Jackson worried him, but he accepted it as a reason why you might not be particularly chipper. For once in his life, Joel had never desired to be in his brother’s commune as badly as he did now. The allure of an actual doctor checking you out was driving him mad. Everytime the wind shook the shed that night or you shifted uncomfortably beside him, he wanted to throw you on the back of the horse and ride until he got to the gates. But Joel wasn’t stupid, he knew his eyesight wasn’t what it used to be and riding around in the dark like that was pointless. It was the thought of you finally getting the help you needed safely that got him through it. 

After the two of you departed from the shed, it was that second day on the road that had broken his spirit. Jackson was so close, another hour and he would be at the doors, but the temperatures had quickly dropped to dangerously low levels. Joel had shook with each sharp gust of wind, a movement which was mirrored by you in the saddle behind him. After trying to tough it out for the majority of the miserable day, he had finally decided to pull off until the weather broke. 

The luxurious home near the ski lodge Joel found was a god send. It even had a gate that he quickly latched behind him before he led the horse towards the side of the building. And to his surprise, there was nothing lurking within the abandoned place. The only scary thing that was in the beautifully built home was you, sitting in complete silence as he fiddled with the large fireplace that sat in the living room. 

After breaking apart some discarded boxes, books, and a kitchen chair, he managed to spark a flame that quickly grew into a blazing heat. Closing his eyes, Joel allowed his limbs to unthaw for a few breaths. Then he hummed and turned, about to offer his hand for you to join him, but you weren’t there. Glancing around the room, you weren’t anywhere to be found on the open concept first floor and Joel’s heart lurched, a sweat breaking out on the back of his neck instantly. 

“Darling? Where’d ya go?,” he shakily called. 

No answer. 

Joel cussed, leaving the fire to search the house. He checked the second floor first, finding nothing but a couple of chairs that looked out upon the frozen landscape. Jogging down the creaking steps, he ran towards the kitchen. He skidded to a stop in front of an open door, panting as he spied the steps to the basement. A chill ran through him at the sight of the shut door at the end, childhood fears about monsters in his parent’s cellar hitting him like a ton of bricks. He had never even thought to check the basement. Stupid, stupid, stupid. 

“Honey?,” he tried again, his chest growing unbearably tighter by the second. 

When no response came for the second time, he broke. Taking the steps two at a time, Joel landed at the bottom and swung the door open so hard that it shook the frame. 

And there you were, arms thrown around yourself in comfort as you faced the glass doors that lined the back wall. Only the top half of the glass showcased the view that was currently shrouded in darkness, the rest of it covered by thick layers of accumulated snow. In four long strides he was at your side, placing a hand on your shoulder that finally made you jump out of your stupor. 

“Oh!,” you gasped, blinking rapidly as if you had just been woken from a dream. 

Joel raised his hands in the air, giving you a worried look as you tried to regain the mask of indifference that hid your true feelings from him. He longed for you to scream at him, to say the pettiest shit you could possibly throw his way, to hurl insults that would make his heart ache for days, anything would be better than this. There was no fixing a non response, there was only the stress of trying to find the missing puzzle piece. If it was him you were mad at, Joel needed to know why.

“I’ve been calling you baby, did you not hear me?,” he asked. 

You blinked, turning from him to look back out at the inky sky. He wanted to grab your shoulders and shake you, to force out the truth the only way he knew how, but he could never be that cruel to you. Especially not with how beat down you looked. What you needed was for him to listen, he just needed you to fucking speak to him first. 

Joel gulped down all of his hesitation and aversions to prodding, placing himself directly in front of the glass to obstruct your view. He grabbed your hands, squeezing them as he lovingly waited for your eyes to stop looking through him. When he finally felt your gaze focus on the fine lines that stained his forehead, Joel decided that that would have to be good enough. 

“Please darling, please talk to me. I’m beggin’ ya. I know you’re not okay but neither am I. We almost lost each other AGAIN and now it feels like I’m still losing you. S’okay if you’re cross with me, just fucking say something. Say anything baby, please,” Joel begged. 

Your eyes met his for the first time in what felt like eons and his heart stuttered at the contact. Butterflies erupted from the growling pit of his stomach, threatening to explode from his mouth with a plethora of praises, but he reined them in. He didn’t want to spook you back into the shadows by coming on too strong. The look of your face was conflicted so Joel stepped forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead as an encouragement. 

“I know m’not the best at this, I’m new to… Talking about feelings and um, stuff. But that don’t mean that I don’t wanna hear about how you’re feeling. I don't want you to keep it secret from me if you’re hurtin,” he tried. 

“Joel, I think maybe we’re… I think that I’m…”

The words trailed off into more silence and he pulled back. Joel pushed a few loose strands behind your ear, nodding his head in encouragement. 

“Go on sweetheart, you can say it. Please, whatever it is, I can take it,” he pleaded. 

You swallowed hard, looking away from him again as you whispered, “I’m just tired, it’s nothing Joel.” 

Joel flinched like he had just been slapped. The frustration he had held back grew hot in his chest, making him dig his teeth into the inside of his mouth to keep back any harsh words that may be hidden beneath the surface. This was something more, something that you were hiding from him. He wasn’t sure how, but he knew it beyond a shadow of a doubt. 

The fact that you felt like Joel couldn’t handle whatever reality you were stuck in right now broke him a little. Memories of him breaking down, sobbing into your neck against the truck over the fear of losing you, blowing up at you after you went into the library without him, even showing you the wreckage he had made in the kids rooms back at the cabin, all made his stomach twist. Had he been wrong to open himself up like that? Did it ruin any chance of you trusting him to take care of you, to safeguard your heart? And finally, did the time with Aspen’s group awaken you to the fact that Joel couldn’t fulfill his duty as a provider? Was it over? 

“I uh -,” Joel cleared his throat, willing the tears of betrayal that threatened his waterline to go away, “I’m gonna go upstairs then, there’s a fire going. I’ll um… I’ll give you some space.” 

Joel turned away, leaving you in the dark basement to be alone with your thoughts. He felt stupid. Of course you thought of him as weak, he couldn’t seem to protect you from anyone or anything. He was unable to care for anyone properly, despite the fact that it was all he had ever really wanted to do. 

It was Joel Miller’s curse. To love someone so dearly, yet to not be able to safeguard them or cherish them in the way that he should, which inevitably would lead to their demise. Rinse and repeat. The moment he got you to Jackson at least you would be safe, even if you didn’t want anything to do with him afterwards. Rarely did omegas ever leave their alphas after being claimed, and vice versa, but Joel wasn’t surprised that he was about to be one of the few. 

“God, I’m a fucking asshole,” Joel muttered as he walked back upstairs, ignoring the creaking in his knees at the movement.  

The mark on his neck burned with despair and Joel cupped it, swallowing hard as he made his way back to the fireplace. Was it yours? Was it his? He couldn’t tell, all of the pain seemed to blur together as of late. His eyes were glossy as he pulled throw pillows and blankets onto the floor, creating a comfy place for you to sleep in front of the roaring fire. Once he was finished, he bent down, scrubbing angrily at his puffy eyes as he tried to let the flames to soothe him. 

Before you crashed into his life, Joel hadn’t cried for years. Only in dreams would a few strays come to the surface, but he didn’t count those. He had been a steel trap, a hardened shell that kept out any human emotion that could either harm or help him. But you, you had pried him open with your bare hands embarrassingly fast. He hadn’t even had time to realize it, but you released the softer part of him that had been trapped for years. Joel was constantly in awe of how you managed to get him to fold, easily opening the floodgates that had been sealed off for way too long by just being you. He was usually pretty thankful for that, but not now. Not when he couldn’t seem to get his damned emotions in check anymore, not when you had lost trust in him because of that. 

Just as Joel was about to lift himself from the floor to go find you and bring you towards warmth, he felt two soft hands on his shoulders. He froze, not wanting to scare you away by doing anything wrong, but he softened when a kiss landed on the bald patch in his beard. You continued, giving him a few more pecks and he soon felt his cheeks grow warm from the attention. 

“Come lay down with me,” you whispered. 

He did not hesitate, jumping to his feet instantly and turning to face you. The smile you gave him was the first real one in days and although it didn’t totally wipe out the tightness in your expression, it did brighten your eyes. Joel watched while you discarded the majority of your clothes, leaving you in nothing but an old shirt and a pair of panties as you snuggled into the sheets on the floor. He stared down at you, not sure of what you expected from him. Did he leave his clothes on? Would you care if he rid himself of his filthy jeans? 

“Joel, just get comfortable and lay down. That’s all I’m asking,” you huffed, patting the place by your right. 

Joel nodded, dutifully shimmying off his dirty clothes until he was in nothing but his boxers. He knew he probably should have kept some of them on, especially with god knows what lurking outside, but the allure of feeling your soft skin against his after days of being shut out was too tempting. Drifting over to you, he groaned as he dropped to the floor. Uncomfortable zaps of pain shot from his lower back, making all of his muscles tense from the feeling but he managed to clumsily flop onto his back beside you. 

Like ice against an open flame, you melted against his side and Joel pulled you close. He sighed as your hand came up, twirling his chest hairs between your fingers as he tangled his legs with yours. With the fire roaring in the background and you stuck to him, he finally felt courageous enough to ask the question that had been on his mind all day. 

“When we get to Jackson, what are you going to do?,” Joel asked. 

A beat passed. 

“What do you mean?,” you returned, sounding incredibly confused at his wording. 

He swallowed around the lump in his throat, “M’just wondering if you were planning on… I don’t know honey, clearly I haven’t been what you needed. And now, you’re probably realizing that and I just… I wanted to know if you had made plans for when we get there.” 

Another pregnant pause passed, making Joel regret everything he had ever said in his entire life. Why did he have to ask that when you were finally coming around? Maybe you weren’t even thinking about it until Joel had to go run his stupid fucking mouth, he had probably just said goodbye to every bit of good in his life. Dread curdled the lining of his stomach and he suddenly felt like he was waiting for the guilty verdict that would send him straight to deathrow. 

“Oompfh! Fuck’s sake darling, watch it,” Joel groaned as you clambered up onto his lap, kneeing him in the groin in the process. 

Two hands cupped his cheeks, forcing him to look at you in the dim room. Gazing up at you, he noticed how the orange glow of the fire illuminated your skin. A few scrapes and bruises remained but aside from that, you were as beautiful as the day he pulled you from that river bed. Joel sighed and grasped your hips as your thumbs brushed across his face. He knew what you were going to say, that you were planning to leave him despite the bond, that he wasn’t enough. At least this way, with him taking in your gorgeous body for the last time, he could cherish this as his last memory of being able to hold you. 

“Is that what you want me to do?,” you whined. 

The desperation in your voice distracted him from the downward spiral he was in, forcing Joel’s attention back on you. 

“It doesn’t matter what I want sweetheart, you - ,” he choked on the words, looking away so that he could collect himself before he whispered, “You need someone who can be a better partner than me. That’s clear as day to me now and m’sorry I held ya back for so long.” 

The tortured sob that came from your lips surprised him. The cry was garbled, sounding like it was somewhere between a whimper and a howl. Joel gasped as you cried out, digging crescent moons into his shoulders as you shook him wildly with your hands. The pain was minimal but the shock of watching his mate absolutely lose it was something else. This is not the reaction he had wanted, all he wanted to do was give you the out you so clearly needed but were too afraid to ask for. 

“I don’t want anyone else Joel! I want you, so stop trying to leave me! PLEASE! I fucking need you, you asshole!,” you shouted, practically shaking the walls with your booming voice. 

Joel quickly rolled you over, blanketing your body with the solid weight of his own. Your arms and legs wound themselves around him tightly, keeping him trapped in your embrace. Not that he minded. Joel grasped your chin, opening your neck up for him to scent along the line of your throat while you sobbed uncontrollably. 

“S’okay darling, I already told ya that I won’t ever leave you. Was just tryin’ to give you an out in case you needed one honey, I just want you to be happy is all. You’ve been so sad, I thought it was my fault,” he mumbled in between kisses and nips. 

You sniffed with a vice like grip on his curls as he laved his tongue over the mark. Joel debated on biting into it again. The hormones it would release would certainly calm you, but he decided against it. He reminded himself that it was gentle that you needed. 

“I’m only happy when I’m with you. I’ve only EVER been happy with you Joel, so please, don’t say shit like that to me anymore. No matter how many outs you give me, I’m never going to take them so cut it the fuck out. How would you feel if I did that all the time?,” you sobbed. 

Joel sighed, “Okay, I’m sorry baby. I guess I just got stuck in my head these last few days with everything, but I was worried sick. You saying nothing isn’t exactly normal.” 

Again, the room filled itself with the sound of the crackling firewood and the snow pelting against the glass windows. Joel winced but continued to dote open you, hoping to unlock any piece of information you were willing to give as he brushed his lips over the mark again and again. Finally, with his scent covering yours and the weight of his body crushing you into the plush blankets, you let something slip. 

“I’m… I’m scared Joel,” you said, the words barely a whisper. 

Joel pulled himself from the crook of your neck, propping himself up by placing his forearms on either side of your face. With him positioned this way, your bodies intertwined and the both of you breathing the same air, he looked deep into your eyes as he asked you, “Why?” 

Your eyes shifted away from him but they couldn’t go far, instead tracing the outline of his nose as you mumbled a response that was so quiet he could only make out one singular word. 

“Family? You’re worried about your family? Do you mean your mom and Jake? I don’t know where they are honey, but I’m sure they’re alright. Seemed like tough cookies to me,” he soothed. 

The crinkle in your nose made his brows furrow. Joel frowned as you shook your head at his guess. He sighed, frustrated at your unwillingness to elaborate and his own inability to read you as well as you did him. Then, it dawned upon him. 

Joel sucked in a breath, “Then it has to be…”

Of course, how could he have missed it? The exhaustion, the nervousness, the mood swings, the lack of appetite, that could only mean one thing. Even now, as you stared up at him with terrified eyes, you were too afraid to tell him. Terrified of what he might say at your completely reasonable discomfort, you had made yourself sick from the anxiety. Joel kicked himself for not realizing it sooner. He could’ve stopped all the negative thoughts that were running through your mind if he had known. 

“You’re afraid to see MY family, not yours,” Joel exclaimed. 

The way your eyes widened told him that he was right on the money. He sighed, knocking his forehead against your own in a playful manner. 

He tsked, “Should’ve just told me sweetheart, I wouldn’t have been mad at ya.”

You nodded shakily, “Sure yeah, I uh… I think they’re going to hate me maybe.” 

Joel sucked his teeth, cradling your head with one of his hands while the other caressed your cheeks. He leaned in, brushing his nose with yours before he kissed you once, then two more times after that. Each of them were slow and sweet, like little bursts of sunshine on a rainy day, and the way you were calmed by them made him smile. 

“Tommy might be a lot, you’ve heard the stories, but he’s always been the friendlier Miller brother. There’s nothing to worry about there. Maria is a bit tougher, she kinda scares me, but I think you’ll get on just fine. She’s fair, just doesn’t take any shit. And Frankie is only four, so I don’t think he’ll mind ya much,” he joked. 

You gave a small smile but it still didn’t fully reach your eyes, “Okay baby, I’m sure you’re right.”

Fuck that. 

Joel wanted, scratch that, he needed you to understand that you were wanted. That you were loved by him, meaning that his brother would love you too or he’d have to pay for it. He might be older now, but he wasn’t above using some good old fashioned schoolyard justice on Tommy if he didn’t accept his mate. Not that he thought he would have to, Joel was pretty sure the only unwelcome guest upon arrival to Jackson might be him. 

“Hey, none of that. You’re the only person I want to see, day in and day out, for the rest of my life. You’re the only person who I would do anything for. Honey, you’re it. They ain’t blind, m’sure they’ll see that. Hell, they’ll probably throw you a damned parade for putting up with me. And if they don’t, fuck ‘em,” Joel said simply. 

And he truly meant that. You were the one anomaly in his life. Find a girl and have a daughter, lose the girl and lose the daughter. Find another girl who turns out to be his best friend and find another daughter through unusual circumstances, lose the girl and lose the daughter again. When Joel left Jackson in a haste after Ellie death, having done nothing more than drink and grouch for the two days he wandered the streets, he decided he was finally going to take himself out of the equation. And then, you happened. You, who survived time and time again against all odds. You, who understood him in a way no one else ever could. 

Joel didn’t give two flying fucks if Tommy and Maria didn’t like you. He didn’t care if they thought the age difference was strange. He didn’t even mind the sideways glances he might get as he strolled through town with you on his arm. The only person’s feelings he truly gave a shit about was yours. As long as none of the negativity blew back on you, he didn’t care. Joel would happily take it all. 

“You’d love me no matter what, right? Even if… Even if I had to - Like if I told you that I’m uh, well that I might be - ,” you sputtered, unable to fully get the words out. 

He leaned down and captured your lips, pressing his mouth against yours until you relented. Feeling it when you finally allowed the tension to release from your muscles, Joel smiled into the kiss as you tugged on his overgrown curls. Pressing his tongue against the seam of your lips, he breathed in deeply when you let him in, tangling your tongue with his. There was a bit of heat to it, growing in intensity by the second, but mostly it was just about exploring each other. He squeezed every bit of skin he could, humming in satisfaction at the weight of your curves beneath his palms. 

When Joel finally parted from you, your lips were swollen and shining. A haze covered your eyes, making you look almost drunk beneath him. It made his cock stir between his thighs but he pushed any thoughts of that nature away. The only desire he needed to quench tonight was his desire for you to finally be happy again. 

“I love you, no strings attached. There’s no ifs or buts - no exceptions. I just love ya darling, that’s all there is to it,” Joel murmured against your lips. 

You sighed, “I love you too Joel, so much that it scares me sometimes.”

He grinned at that, feeling giddy at your admission. Joel was an all in type of guy, in every possible way. Even before your paths crossed, he was a little bit unhinged. A lifetime of trauma and violence had loosened a few screws in his mind, that was for sure. But after meeting you, after claiming you as his own, Joel was downright feral at the drop of a hat for you. He’d bring the entire world to its knees and dance around in the ashes of the fallen for you. And for some reason, he was lucky enough to fall in love with a woman that would match his energy in that way. 

“What’s got you smiling like that lover boy?,” you cackled. 

Joel opened his eyes, having slid them shut as you played with his mussed strands. He couldn’t help it, the feeling of your fingers against his scalp was his kryptonite. 

“Just thinking about you pretty girl, s’all I’m ever thinking about,” he sighed into your mouth as you latched onto him. 

The kiss you shared was sweet, or at least that’s what Joel had meant for it to be when he accepted your advance. However, when your tongue flicked against his and your heels dug into the small of his back, forcing his hips flush with yours, he couldn’t help the pornographic moan he released. In return, he sucked on your tongue, making you claw at his bare shoulders and squirm beneath him in desperation. 

“Please Joel,” you panted when he finally let up. 

Kissing down the side of your neck, Joel stopped at the indents his teeth had left on you forever. He grabbed your throat, holding it still as he bit down with enough pressure to break the skin again. Your garbled scream of pleasure was cut off by his hand pressing over your mouth, effectively silencing you as Joel licked the wound clean. When he finally pulled away, your pupils were so wide that they eclipsed any bit of color that your irises usually held. He licked his lips as he stared down at yours, suddenly starved for any scrap of affection you could possibly throw his way. 

“What’s that baby? Tell me what you need,” Joel pleaded, knocking noses with you once more. 

With the glow of the fire warming the both of you, the storm raging outside, the pile of rich fabrics saving you from the hardwood floor, and your bodies intertwined, it felt like you were the only two people left in the world. There were no infected, no raiders, no annoying brothers, no scary mothers, no damaged pasts, it was just you and Joel. 

“I need you Joel. Love you too much baby, need to feel it,” you whined. 

Joel nodded, kissing both of your cheeks before he brushed away the stray tear that rolled down your face. He cooed at your teary eyes and kissed you again, softly this time, before he traced the column of your throat with his lips. Working his way down your body, Joel stopped and suckled at your nipples. Pulling on both of them with his mouth until you squealed, he stopped to admire the hardened peaks. 

“S-sensitive,” you moaned as he blew cold air against them, making them tighten up even more. 

“I noticed that darling, so pent up aren’t we? Love hearing how good I make you feel, let it all out for me,” Joel said, continuing his wet kisses until he reached your mound. 

The curls that covered your mound made his breath hitch and he quickly parted your legs, famished for the taste of your weeping slit on his tongue. Joel looked up at you, maintaining eye contact as he licked a stripe up the seam. Circling your button with the tip of his tongue on the upstroke, he hummed at the delicious taste of your essence. It was like the sweetest honey he could possibly imagine and he was shameless in the way he began to greedily suck it from your folds. 

“J-Joel, oh my gooood,” you cried out, shaking in his grasp as he threw your legs over his shoulders and pressed your hips down so he could properly devour you. 

With you properly warmed up for him, Joel pressed two fingers inside with ease, slowly thrusting them with such precision that your eyes were rolling into the back of your head. He grinned and leaned back, enjoying playing with your pussy for a moment as he watched you shake. Slick slid out of your slowly tightening hole, dripping down his arm and ruining the sheets below for any future use. 

He grinned, “Does that feel good baby? Feels so good when I’m right there huh?”

You keened and he took that as all the response he needed to add another finger, he kept the slow pace but used more and more pressure to rub at that one spot until you were right on the edge. Sweat dripped down your body, making the moisture glisten in the light of the fire. Joel knew what you needed, teetering on the brink until he decided to grant you mercy, but he wanted to hear you say it. He craved to hear you call for him, to hear how much you needed him, he was sure that he would explode if you didn’t. Just when Joel was about to start begging you for it, you called out for him. 

“Please baby, m’so fucking close. Need you to f- ha!,” you cried out, yanking ruthlessly at his hair as he sucked your clit into his mouth. 

Slick sprayed out of your core, the wetness drenching his face as you shivered through your orgasm. Joel groaned at the explosion of flavor on his tongue, lapping up every drop that you graced him with. His fingers squelched inside of you, never letting up on their pace as your walls clenched and unclenched around them. 

He was so out of it, entirely focused on quenching his need for your slick in his mouth at that moment. So focused that Joel didn’t even realize he was working you up for another, more intense, orgasm that had you thrashing against him. With Joel whining at how your nails dug into his scalp, feet kicking at his back as he held you down, he was in heaven. He stayed stuck to your core until you cried out, breathily reminding him of how sensitive you were today for some reason. When Joel’s head popped back up from your bottom half, his entire face was shining with your juice and he grinned down upon you like a madman. 

You laughed, “What’s that look for?” 

Joel shrugged, playing off his giddiness with a shake of the head. He wasn’t sure what was making him so giddy but he knew it had something to do with you. Nuzzling your neck, he placed a plethora of sloppy kisses there until you sunk even deeper into the floor. Lifting your chin, you allowed him more space to work as he licked over the wound he had made again. 

“Need you inside please, right now,” you sighed, the sentiment half a whine and half a demand. 

Pulling back, Joel pressed himself up on his forearms so that he could get a look at you. With flushed cheeks and a sparkle of lust in your eyes, you had come alive again. He understood and he felt the same. Being without your attention for two days had felt like he was going through withdrawal, his body and mind had rebelled against every second of it. But now, he felt whole again. 

“Okay darling, I gotchu. Always gotchu, until the day I die,” Joel promised, leaning forward to capture your lips as he positioned himself. 

A whine came from your mouth when he pressed himself inside, slowly burying himself to the hilt and hungrily devouring each sound that the weight of his cock pulled from your mouth. Still hungry for more, Joel slipped one leg over his shoulder and sunk so deep that you had to pull your mouth off of his to gasp. With every inch of him inside, throbbing against your twitching walls as you struggled to adjust, Joel’s mind felt fuzzy. 

“Big s-so big Joel, s’too much,” you whined against his mouth. 

Joel groaned, “I know honey, but you can take it. I always make it fit, don’t I? My sweet pussy is so good at letting me stretch her out, isn’t she? Listen to her baby, she loves it.” 

You whimpered at his filthy words, leaving red scratch marks on his back and shoulders as your hips started to grind down against his. Joel chuckled, taking that as all the green light he needed for him to start thrusting away at your dripping hole. 

“Yes, yes, yes, so good Joel. Too good for me, love it, love you,” you babbled with fresh tears shining in your eyes. 

The praise released some of the stress that had worked its way into his muscles, making him sink further into you until not a single inch of space remained. Sweat slicked and panting, the two of you writhed together on the floor, working yourselves higher and higher with each movement. The leg over his shoulder began to shake and Joel turned his head, pressing hip lips to your calf before he nipped it. You yelped at the sting, clenching down on him so hard that he almost lost it. 

“Shit babygirl,” he groaned, “Don’t do that or unless you want me to fucking fill you up. God - fuck, make you mine.” 

“You already have,” you sobbed, pulling him down to pant against your mouth as the tension rose, “I’m already yours Joel, it’s yours baby, shiiiiit.”  

When he felt your pussy spasm, preparing to gush around his cock and milk him for all he’s worth, Joel pressed his mouth close to your ear. Groaning as he focused on keeping the pace, he managed to grunt out a command that he knew would finish you off. 

“All mine hm? Such a good girl honey, now cum for me. Show me how good my cock makes you feel and fucking cum,” Joel ordered you. 

Joel kissed you then, greedily taking all of the choked noises you released and drinking them down like they were the finest aged brandy he had ever tasted. Your pussy choked him, holding him in a vice grip before your walls began to pulsate around him so hard that the intensity of it almost hurt. He hissed, his pace faltering a bit at the feeling of your drenched walls trying to hold him hostage, and barely managed to hold on. 

He wanted you to be able to ride out your orgasm, to let every bit of pleasure roll over you until you were boneless and sated, but you had other plans. Almost as if you had sensed Joel holding back, you grasped the back of his neck and brought him closer. With one hand to his throat, gently nudging his chin upwards as your other remained buried in his hair, you nosed at his neck for a moment before clamping your teeth over the spot you had already claimed. 

A high like no other rushed through him as you broke the skin, further cementing your place in his life with yet another claim over his mind, body, and soul. He whined loudly, shoving all of himself inside of you with one brutal thrust that forced you up the makeshift bed by a couple of inches as you stayed latched onto him. Pure ecstasy raced through his veins, making him collapse on top of you as his cock spurted a seemingly endless stream of cum deep inside of you. When you finally pulled away, licking up the blood that rose to the surface and sealing the wound with your tongue, Joel was completely boneless. 

“I’ll only ever choose you Joel, over anyone and anything. You’re stuck with me, I hope you realize that,” you sighed into his ear once you were done. 

Joel hummed, “Sounds mighty fine honey. Being stuck with you is the only thing I’d ever want.” 

The laugh you granted him lit up his insides, making his heart swell with all of the thick emotions that the poets used to write about before the world went to shit. He wished that he had the words to explain to you how he truly felt, how he would tear out his own heart and give it to you if he thought that’s what you wanted, but he would have to settle for the laugh that warmed him after he said something cheesy. Which was alright, the latter still seemed to work on you. 

When Joel finally gathered his wits and his knot had gone down enough, he moved to pull away but you stopped him. Whining and locking your legs around him even tighter, you effectively kept his hips hostage. 

“Darling, let me get you something to clean up with. Then we can cuddle,” he tried, stroking your sides to comfort you. 

Sometimes after sex, it was him. Sometimes after sex, it was you. Or sometimes, it was the both of you. Either way, at least one party was always greedier for the proximity than the other and the other was always more than happy to oblige. No matter who started it, it always ended with the two of you staying wrapped up in each other for hours. Not that Joel was complaining, it was usually him falling asleep while buried inside of you. With you wrapped around him in every possible way as he slept, he always felt so safe. He couldn’t help it, Joel was an old man and cumming inside of your pussy was like taking a pre-outbreak prescription grade xanax.  

“Please, can you just stay inside for a bit longer? I just want to feel close to you right now, I’ve missed you,” you begged him. 

And who was Joel to say no to such a request? Rolling himself back over the length of you, he groaned as his cock nestled itself back inside. The whine you let out at the feeling made him involuntarily twitch, the blood rushing back to his groin quickly. When you clenched around him, he had a hard time trying not to start thrusting again. 

“Was getting me to stay inside just a way for you to get me to fuck you again because if so, you could’ve just asked,” Joel laughed. 

You giggled, “No, that’s just your dirty mind, old man.”

He guffawed, encouraged by your taunting to start thrusting his oversensitive cock in and out until he was fully hardened again. His cum squelched inside of your pussy, pouring out around the sides of him and dampening the curls that rubbed at your clit. 

“Old man huh? When are you gonna admit that you like that I’m older -umph, shit - you like that I know how to take care of that little pussy, hm?,” he taunted, making you moan and begin to swivel your hips against him. 

“Yesss, I love it. F-fuck, love how you know how to fuck me, take care of me, nobody else could ever do it like you do daddy,” you gasped. 

The squeal you let out when Joel threw both of your legs over his shoulders, effectively bending you in half as he slid even deeper than before, was music to his ears. Fingernails scrabbled at his strong arms as they pressed the backs of your knees up by your face, gifting him with even more angry red marks to remember you by. The thought of you marking him up, showing that he was undeniably yours, made his cock jump inside of you. 

“Fuck yeah darling, know you do,” he moaned, picking up the pace until he was slamming himself into you hard and fast. 

The room was filled with a cacophony of slapping skin, whines, and groans. The squelching of your cum soaked pussy was lewd, but it made him groan and pound into you even faster. Joel smiled devilishly when your eyes rolled back, legs shaking as you clamped down on him again. He grunted as your release splashed his lower abdomen. 

“Aw honey, already?,” he chuckled darkly, “Well, I’m not done with you yet. Not even fucking close.” 

Just as your fourth orgasm petered off, making you a mess of splayed limbs and sweat against the floor, Joel pulled out and flipped you onto your front. As you arched your back, lifting your hips and dropping your chest to the blankets to present yourself for him, Joel bit the inside of his cheek. He didn’t even have to ask you for it. 

One of his hands came up to your ass, rubbing the skin softly before he slapped it. You moaned, more slick dripping down your spread legs as you wiggled in anticipation. He grabbed his cock, trying desperately to ward off the ecstacy that loomed in his gut as he watched a glob of your shared release drip onto the floor. Joel couldn’t cum yet. First, he needed to wreck you. 

“So beautiful like this, perfect for me,” Joel whispered, leaning forward to kiss up your spine. 

The soft kisses he left on your back was in sharp contrast to the way Joel pushed himself inside, driving himself to the hilt without any warning. He reared back, drawing himself almost all the way out before he slammed back in. Starting a ruthless pace that had you babbling nonsense into the blankets, Joel could feel his balls tightening up already. Your pussy was too wet, too warm, to fucking tight around him, with each thrust forward making you grip his cock harder. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could last like this. 

“Daddyyyy, fuuuck! Please, please, please, please, I’ll be good, so good for you,” you cried. 

He wasn’t sure you even knew what you were begging for, so lost in the fog of pleasure that you were just spewing pleading sentiments to call for something you didn’t know you needed. Luckily, Joel was fluent in the babbling whines you let out during sex and blanketed himself over you. Pressing the weight of his body into yours, he grinned when you dissolved into high pitched keens that made him twitch in turn. Gripping one of your breasts in his hands, his heart soared when you laced your fingers with his. 

“Joel,” you sighed, squeezing his hand. 

“Yeah honey?,” he panted, trying hard to stave off his incoming orgasm until he felt your release. 

“I love you,” you said. 

And just like that, he was done for. Joel’s mind went blank and he heard an embarrassingly loud whine crawl out of his throat. Thrusting up hard two more times, he cried out as his cock locked inside of you and released a torrent of cum, coating your walls with milky white. Joel’s eyes rolled into the back of his head as you finally came around him, your walls sucking him in, tightening and untightening around him hard as he gave you every last bit of his release. It just kept going and going, until he felt like he was never going to stop cumming. It was only when the pleasure started to fade off into overstimulation that your pussy was finally sated. He collapsed, maneuvering you so that you were comfortable in his arms as he curled around you. 

“Fuck honey, that was…,” he started. 

“Yeah,” you dumbly agreed, still panting as you came down. 

Joel laughed and so did you, ushering in a silence that wasn’t filled with hidden resentments or fears. It was peaceful and loving, his heart warming as you reached back to play with his curls. He hummed and nosed at your throat, brushing sweet kisses along the fresh bite as he watched the way the crackling fire glinted off of your sweat soaked skin. 

“I love you too, so much,” Joel finally answered and you hummed, leaning back to capture his lips in a sweet kiss before you snuggled back down into the blankets. 

On the strict agreement that you would wake him if he fell asleep for too long, Joel laid behind you and pressed his face into the crook of your neck. You sighed, hugging the arm slung around your chest and reaching back to play with his hair every so often as he softened inside of you. Every part of him was glued to you in the stillness of the night, making sure he stayed as close as humanly possible as your heart rates slowed down together. 

When you finally fell asleep, not faking it for the first time in two days, Joel was extremely careful not to wake you when he pulled out. After pausing with every inch, he was graced with the sight of his own cum spilling out of you and onto the blankets. He grinned, having to shake himself from the far off fantasy of a swollen belly that the view sparked in his mind. It was ridiculous of course, he was much too old and the world was way too fucked up, but he had to admit that the thought of it was nice. Perhaps in a different life the two of you would have made it a reality. 

Shaking himself from the fantasy, Joel carefully tiptoed from the room and managed to scrounge up some abandoned baby wipes stuffed inside one of the bathroom drawers. The moisture in them had long since dried up, but the wipes themselves still smelled nice and were perfect for cleaning the both of you off before he eased himself back down. You turned over, mumbling something about family again in your sleep as you threw a leg over him. It made him smile. Never in his life had Joel thought that it was Tommy of all people that would be giving you all this grief. 

“S’alright sugar,” he sighed, “You’re easy to fall in love with.” 

Wrapping his arms around you and pressing a firm kiss to the top of your head, Joel felt himself being lulled by the sounds of the dying fire and your muffled sleep talking. To ward off the incoming chill of the morning, he pulled a few blankets up around your bodies and pressed himself even closer to you. Finally, with you peacefully sleeping in his arms for the first time in days, he dozed off. 

It was only the next morning, when a familiar voice jolted him from sleep, that Joel had wished he thought to put on some clothes. His eyes snapped open, quickly finding a pair of brown ones that matched his own. Joel lurched forward, clutching at the blankets that had been kicked away, trying the best that he could to protect your sleeping form from an unwanted gaze. 

Tommy raised his eyebrows at him, politely averting his eyes as Joel’s fussing caused you to stir with an annoyed groan. 

“Joooooel, stop it! You fucked the shit out of me last night, it’s only fair that you let me sleep in you asshole,” you whined. 

Joel’s eyes widened, his face turning even redder as he looked up at his grinning little shit of a brother. Tommy chuckled and shook his head, looking like he had about a million jokes to crack as the eldest Miller did his best impression of a deer caught in headlights. You were none the wiser, already fast asleep at his side again and completely unaware of the bomb you had just dropped in front of the person you had been terrified to meet hours earlier. 

“Well howdy to you too big brother, looks like we’ve got a hell of a lot to catch up on.” 

[cu7ie]

overstim piss makes me go fucking insane you're absolutely brilliant perce holy crud: pee stuff tw i never written this before <3 coochie!reader but no pronouns/genderless pet names my cases are fucked up its like 12:01 sorry LOL

Between your legs, Toji is indistinguishable from beast. Pitch hair sweat slick and mussed to his forehead, nose tipped down low and nestled in the soft flesh above the mound of your pussy as he sucks insistently on your clit. his hand fucks into you with quick deep strokes while he's got you reclined on the bed, legs spread as far as you can get them. When your knees started to shake, he whispered little comforts into your thighs and worked with his hands. "Precious little slut you are... Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky. That's it, baby... keep clenching down on my fingers." And you were good for him then. Kept your thighs open and your lips spread. Even begged him for more. But that was four orgasms ago. He's working you up to the fifth and the repeated sensation has gotten you feeling a little wild, if you can believe it. you're gripping onto satin sheets like you're fighting for your life (and nobody could convince you otherwise), dissolved into curses and pants and moans, your fingers drawing fabric into sweaty palms as you arch your spine, twist and turn as though it'd alleviate any of the pressure. he drinks in your fervor and fucks it back into you, holding your hip still to keep you from jerking away from his attentions. it almost feels like you've gone numb to it until he's getting you to that blessed place again, where your head gets all fuzzy and your stomachs in knots; though your body doesn't feel as light as it did before—that weightlessness nirvana almost peculiarly beyond you. it doesn't feel right. not terrible—the exact opposite in fact, you feel too good, panting and clamping and sweating as Toji bears down on you, but something about the three fingers he has crooked up into you is making you feel different. suddenly too full. that primal heat in your belly, a coiled snake of jumbled nerves; agonizing pleasure nearly painful, divides and multiplies. it builds like stress, a strange yet weight right above your uterus, settling in your bladder— "Toji—I'm, y-you need to stop!—" He barely glances up. Your hands quickly reach for his head and manage to yank it up, but his fingers keep going. The heat in your face begins to sour from your embarrassment. The pressure keeps building, and he's still fucking pushing you. Goading you, moaning when you tug his hair back. His skin is hot and flushed too. Licks that scar on his lip just as he seals your fate. "Just cum doll," goes down to the third knuckle, so deep you're seeing stars. "No need to be so shy," he curls his fingers and presses firmly up. You follow his order and let go. It's exhilarating and mortifying. Toji's not expecting any of it. You moan makes him think you're squirting, though when it lasts for more than a few seconds and leaks out onto the sheets, he's staring up at you, eyes twinkling with stars of amusement. "Wooooow, my fingers that fucking good?" You groan and it cuts through the air like a sob, your palms pressed firmly into your eye sockets as you prepare to hear the story for months to come. once you've started pissing it's like you can't stop, liquid trickling down your thigh if it doesn't get soaked into the sheet. "Yeah, let it all out." You can't tell if he's making fun of you, but it kills you a little anyway. bladder emptied after a moment, you lay in a shameful silence, Toji seemingly faded into nothing as you hide yourself in the crook of your elbow. you're too embarrassed to look up, speak up, breathe even. For a moment, only deafening silence. (what you don't see: Toji's adam's apple bob as he watches you completely and utterly lose it. the most indecent he's gotten you to date, and that's definitely saying something. he's hard; but there is still very much work to be done here. he doesn't notice how he licks over his lips, bares a fang,)

Then, a curious taste. A warm wet muscle curling on the inside of your slick thigh, licking up the damp, near-sticky coating. He moans softly and your skin feels like it burns where it touches, but he's persistence given physique, single minded and diligent as he carefully cleans you up. He gets a good grip on the fat of your thigh til its poking out between his fingers, getting used to the bitter and salt of you on his tongue. You're at a loss for words when he's finished, shuddering and heaving as your body fully relaxes, melts into your sheets like butter on flapjacks. He claps a hand on your thigh and you jolt a little, move your arm off your face finally to get a good look at this demon of a man. He's still smirking at you, the bastard. "Damn baby, really know how to keep shit surprising, mm?" He reaches for his collar and takes off his shirt. You're boneless, a beached whale, on your last legs, waving your white flag. You don't even think you could get up. You're not sure if it's the horror of looking Toji in the eyes keeping you horizontal, or the tingling-near-numbness in your toes. You don't have to consider it for long though, because Toji makes up his mind before you. He scoops you up with little argument from yourself; who flops over his shoulder and lets him do all the work of getting you to the tub. I told you so, you nearly say, but your throat is sore from whining, and he beats you to the punch anyway.

"Talk about making a fuckin' mess, am I right?"

do you think toji would actually like pissing on you? like piss marking or does he only like the humiliating aspect of it? would he drink your piss? im invested now-

i think its a desire he would have but never act upon unless you say you want it! like he knows its kinda out there for kinks but he's fantasized about marking you like that. something so primal and raw about covering you in his cum and piss that makes his cock twitch <3

hmmm i think you could convince him to drink yours tbh. especially if its like... he overstims you to the point that you accidentally piss all over yourself!! he'd probably freeze for a second before he helps lick you clean, teasing you about how you can't even handle some orgasms before you make a mess everywhere

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Hey lovely~ I hope you’re having a good day! I just wanted to share how my day is going. It’s 7:01am and I just got bombarded with the filthiest thought about Bucky, so if it’s okay, I was wondering if maybe it sparked something and you could write for it? If not, that’s okay too and I still hope you have a good day! <3 Also I’m not even sure how much sense I’m making because I haven’t had coffee so sorry for that and thank you in advance for listening to the early morning, feral thirst rampage 😂 anyway love you bye (p.s even if you don’t write for it, I hope you enjoy the filth~)

“You know I love you, right?”

His thrust had you whimpering, “yes.”

“Good, because I’m about to f-ck you like I don’t.”

Well that sent an ache straight down to my coochie 🥵 GOOD MORNING THRISTY NONNIE - I’m so glad you woke up with this delicious filth on your mind and chose to share it with me ❤️❤️❤️ I love you 😘

Warnings: 18+ only, nsfw, spanking, degradation words (slut), unprotected sex, fingering, probably other stuff

Bucky was like a wild animal as he tossed you on the bed, your dress bouncing up high on your thighs and he was already pushing his pants down his legs. You could feel the moisture pooling in your panties, more leaking from your needy cunt every second that you watched his hand stroking up and down his raging hard on. Your heart raced as he pushed you back so you were splayed on the bed for him, his fingers brushing your panties aside before he thrust straight into your core. The air left your lungs as he slammed home and you gasped at the sudden fullness, knowing it was all because of your teasing under the table at dinner that left him hard and frustrated.

“You know I love you, right?”

His thrust had you whimpering, “yes.”

“Good, because I’m about to fuck you like I don’t.”

He pulled out without warning and flipped you onto your stomach as he tore through the thin lace material, pushing your dress higher o he could massage your ass. His fingers threatened to leave bruised as he gripped the flesh as rolled it away, enjoying how it jiggled when he shook it before he smarted your cheek with a swift slap. You gasped at the sudden sting until he pressed his cool vibranium palm to the burning skin and rubbed it gently. Your ass pushed up higher, begging for more with a moan and he saw your push lips glistened with your arousal.

“That’s it my little slut.” Bucky chuckled. “You need a good spanking after what you did at dinner.”

You moaned as he plunged two thick fingers into you, twisting his wrist as he fucked you into distraction only to surprise you with another spank. Your core clenched as your brain and body lost all cohesion and the fire on your asscheek spread to your belly and you cried out as you rolled your hips and tried to finish yourself on Bucky’s hand.

“You wanna cum so badly don’t you, doll.” He teased in your ear as he pulled his fingers out and held them in front of you. “Look how wet you are for me, bet you’d let me fuck any of your holes you’re so needy.”

“Oh, god, yes.” You moaned at the thought, grinding your ass back against him as he covered your body beneath his. His cock hung heavy between your thighs, the angle too sharp for your body to swallow him but it was enough to tease along your slit and over your clit. “Oh fuck, please Bucky.”

“Shut up, slut, I’m in charge here.” He said as he shoved his wet fingers into your mouth. “Clean up your mess.”

Your tongue swirled around his fingers, licking and sucking them clean as he lined himself between your legs. Your own taste was making your even wetter and you could hear the proof as he pulled you up to your knees and slapped your pussy lips with his cock. Your legs were trembling as each little hit was so so close to your clit, enough to feel the small vibrations but not enough to tip you over the edge.

“Please, Bucky, please fuck me.” You begged as you pressed your face into the blankets and cried out with frustration.

“It’s not nice to tease now, is it?” He chuckled darkly, pumping his tight fist along his shaft. “Maybe I’ll just finish myself off, cum all over your back instead.”

“No, no, no please I need you to fill me up.” You whined, shaking your ass in temptation and hearing his strained moan at the enticement. “I need you to cum in me, Buck.”

A growl erupted from his chest as he let you pushed against him, your slick folds splitting apart for him to glide in. A flip switched as he felt your warm, wet walls fluttering around his cock and he gripped your hips tight and slammed into you. Your fingers clung to the edge of the bed as he pounded you into the mattress with a speed that left your breathless. Your head was spinning as your bodies slapped together, his hands pulling you back into his thrust with precise timing to reach the deepest parts of your core.

“I’m so close Bucky, fuck, so close.” You panted, a sheen of sweat breaking across your skin as your body temperature soared. You were sure you would spontaneously combust if you didn’t cum but Bucky could feel it starting, your body clamping down on him.

“Shit, doll, so fucking tight.” He shuddered, reaching down your hip so he could apply some pressure to your swollen clit. “Wanna feel you cum, baby girl.”

You didn’t have to be told twice as the pressure erupted and sent shockwaves pulsing through your body. Your clit bounced under his touch and he shuddered behind you as he met his own release, your pussy milking him of every last drop before he sagged against you panting. He fell to his side, pulling you over with him so he could spoon your body as you both came down from your highs, his cock still thick and throbbing inside you.

“That was so hot.” You sighed happily as his fingers gently massaged the red marks he had left. “We should go out for dinner every night.”

He chuckled as he shook his head and reached between your legs, lightly teasing your sensitive clit. “It’s all about balance, baby, sometimes I like to eat in.”

NB: quote prompt request cited below

Darhower, J.M. (2014). Monster In His Eyes. J.M. Darhower.

[torawro]

so bc it’s your fault akira is on my mind all over again, i can’t stop thinking about him having a size kink bc he’s so so so big omfg. and i still stand by the fact that he likes chunky girls who he can fold beneath him and drown his dick in their pussy bc it’s simply the best feeling in the world. you’re thicker, warmer, your pussy gets wetter and you drench the sheets and the dark happy trail on his lower abdomen. akira goes absolutely feral for stuffing you full. you’re so small under him that when he’s leaning over you, his chest is the only sight you have. usually no sight at all considering you’re crying and sobbing so much you can’t focus on anything but the feeling of him pounding his heavy dick into your sloppy cunt. squelching with every brutal smack of his hips bc he’s so aggressive it makes your head fuzzy.

your thighs burning from the stretch of having your knees pressed firmly by your head for so long since he has you in his favorite position; the mating press. your tummy jiggles with every snap, tits occasionally in his salivating mouth he can’t help but suck and gnaw on. the bed squeaks so much and the walls echo with your filthy whines and his barbaric groans and grunts, sounding awfully close to his devil voice. sometimes you can even feel his dick grow bigger inside of you. akira has his mouth hung open, face construed in pleasure with his forehead against your creaking gray headboard with tiny diamonds all over. akira is a talker, and a moaner. and he does it so much it’s second nature at this point. unaware that he’s speaking to you so much. and he forgets what it does to you. your pussy clenching and pulling him deeper when he whispers in your ear and call you out your name. your voice kink satisfied every time. his favorites?

“ooo fuck, baby. could stay in this pussy all fuckin’ day.” or “take that shit like a good girl. you’re so sweet letting me fuck you like a slut.” or “so cute how fast you switch up after i put my dick inside you” if he’s punishing us for being a brat. one thing he can’t stand is a brat and you’re the biggest one he’s known. having to check you real quick by shoving his dick in your mouth or beating your pussy raw to shut you the fuck up. just … akira <3

MOCHA WAIRREMWMWM?!!! ! HOLD ON A DAMN MINUTE OMGGGGGFEE WAIT! LET PULL MYSELF TOGETHER RQ. literally rolling around my bed biting my arm bc im tryin not to moan or make any whining noises bc THIS!! HIM?!??? this was so hot i need him BAADDDDD like the feral feelings is unreal. let’s dissect this little number here

after thinking about him for the last 24 hours AND finishing dmcb and reminding myself how big he is in human and devil form? oh yea a size kink is INEVITABLE. he def like thick girls bc he needs something to grab on to, he loves the pudge and fat he squeezes when he’s reshaping the walls of your pussy. he likes to see it spill from his fingers when he does that roll of his hips and hits that spot inside you. laWDDD HAMMERCY just reading this makes my head fuzzy there’s no way you came up with this on the spot …. there’s no way you write tHIS GOOD.!?! AND AND U ALSO INCORPORATED THE IDEA OF HIM BEING A BRAT TAMER‼️ YESSAAAANMWMWMAMSWDUXWKW YESSSS UGHHG THE WAY U DESCRIBED HIS SIZE COMPARED TO OURS…..im wet asf. and don’t even get me started on the things he SAYS in our ear when he’s drunk off our coochie???!????!??!2!3: id literally cum on the spot. thank you so much for blessing my inbox PLS COME BACK W MORE

[sakusasbunny]

eren being clingy.... eren being so sexually clingy that he finds immense happiness in bringing you pleasure ❤️ and hardly leaves his f cking bed cos he's too busy showering you orgasms. sore tiddies, hips, pussy, mouth and thighs. Carla would knock on his door to make sure he's fine from the all the whining, she's worried that he has a headache from studying . Yes carla your college student son might bring u some grandchildren hurt u wait 😏😏😏!!!!

— eren jaeger + pillow princess gf

cw: oral, almost being caught (kind of)

a/n: got butterflies in my coochie writing this </3

hcs m.list

» LIVES to pleasure you

» will make you sit on his face and smother him with your pussy

» “fuck eren, can you even breathe like that?”

» only response is to suck on your clit even harder

» fucks you until your nothing but a crying mess

» but ofc, he’s still a little shit so he makes you beg for it

» nothing makes him cum harder than when you’re screaming about how good he’s making you feel

— [♡] ;

“hngh... fuck~ eren, please!” your hands were tangled in his hair as you pushed him further into your cunt. his tongue lapped at your pussy, circling your swollen clit, while his fingers worked on stretching your hole.

he could feel your walls clench around his fingers, squeezing tight, and quivering with every stroke. the rough pads of his index and middle fingers worked your g-spot, sending jolts of pleasure up your spine.

eren looked up at you and studied your expression. fat droplets of tears rolled down your flushed cheeks, and your tongue lolled out of your mouth causing spit to dribble down your throat.

you were such a mess for him.

this sight alone made his cock throb. he grinded his hips against the silky fabric beneath him to satiate the ache in his jeans. the praises that fell from your lips only spurred him on.

“god, fuck, h-hahhh... feel so good, eren— so fucking good!” you keened for him. oversensitive walls fluttered around his fingers as he added a third and stretched you out.

“yeah? why don’t you tell me how bad you want it, pretty girl. tell me how badly y’wanna cum.”

you could hear the arrogance in eren’s voice as he teased you. you pictured the corners of his mouth turning up in smirk while his lips glistened with your juices.

his fingers came to an agonizingly slow pace as he awaited your response, “i wanna hear it, c’mon.” eren drawled out his words.

you muffled a scream against your arm as his hand repeatedly slapped your clit urging you to speak.

“what, getting embarrassed all of a sudden? you were so loud for me before, weren’t you?”

“p-please, i need to cum so bad, fuck—” another scream tore through your throat as eren quickened his pace and dove into your pussy, once again teasing your clit.

your legs began to tremble as you approached your high, plush thighs wrapping subconsciously around eren’s head and squeezing. you were reduced to nothing but an incoherent mess as you pleaded him to keep going letting your desperate whines fill the room.

your back arched and your hips bucked up to eren’s mouth before a white, blinding sensation overtook your body. any previous thoughts of keeping your voice down was forgotten as you let out broken cries, too high on pleasure to care if his parents could here you from the living room.

your body tremored as eren worked you through your orgasm, continuing his assault on your overstimulated clit. he trailed soft kisses on your thighs, leaving some bite marks and hickeys, before leaning back on his heels to take in the fucked out expression on your face.

he let out a chuckle as he peppered your face in kisses, “are you okay, baby?” you could only give him a nod in response.

as eren made a move to clean you up, he heard a rapping at his door, “e-eren? are you two okay in there?”

you quickly pulled the blanket over your naked body and sat up, startled as his mother tried to jiggle the locked doorknob. the panicked look on eren’s face told you that he wouldn’t be able to come up with a proper lie.

“uh y-yeah, we’re fine, mrs. jaeger! i’m— i was just, uh, stressed over finals! yeah, i’m sorry i didn’t realize i was being so loud.” you let out a nervous chuckle hoping she would play along with your obvious lie and save you some embarrassment.

“oh- alright sweetie. well, uh, jus-just keep it down next time, okay?”

[fvckbeom]

THOUGHTS ON.....HMMM OH, DOM TAEHYUN

dom!taehyun makes my coochie hard😩 he'd just use his strength to his advantage, manhandling you into whatever position he wants you in and completely overpowering you, pulling your hips towards his in time with his thrusts, making you his personal fucktoy<3 he'd 100% spank you, wether is your ass, pussy, tits or thighs he'd spank it even if it wasn't a punishment, he just loves to hear the little yelps you let out when his hand comes down on your skin and the way you clench around him is evidence enough that you like it too<3

i just want taehyun to fuck me ass up face down style until my body gives out and he has to hold my hips up while i'm a sobbing, drooling mess for him<3

[aonogifreactions]

Rin thirst headcanons nobody asked for

MINORS/EMPTY AND AGELESS BLOGS DONT INTERACT YOU WILL BE BLOCKED :)

a/n: n/sfw!! totally random headcanons i started writing bc i was t h i r s t y. enjoy <3 im sorry i was so chaotic, my mind no worky!! ><

Words: 1,3k.

Rin:

hear me out. he’s usually the one that initiates everything, but sometimes he enjoys if you take the matter into your own hands... literally. he loves when you stroke his cock softly, just to tease him; he’s gonna whine and moan quietly, gasping when you fasten the pace, gripping the sheets so hard he almost rips them apart.

his hips are jerking into your hand to get even more friction, his eyes tear up due to the pleasure he’s getting; his tail wraps itself onto your other wrist mindlessly, urging you to let him cum.

He's trying not to let out any sounds, so he covers his mouth with his hand; you, however, take his hand away from his mouth and encourage him to moan even more, "I wanna hear you, Rin. I wanna know if what I'm doing it's okay. Please."

once your hand gets covered with his cum (and boy ITS A LOT), his hips jerk a few more times until he recovers. his tail unwraps and he apologizes to you with rosy cheeks; he kisses you on the lips gently as a thank you afterwards.

now, the sight of him inserting his dick into your pussy is so lovely; whether you notice it or not, he’s always looking how it disappears within your sweet, wet pussy. when you clench on him when he inserts it, oh god you’re about to witness the most beautiful face expressions you’ve ever seen.

It's like.. he's almost hypnotized. His face is calm, slightly adored with a blush, yet it has that dark vibe; his eyebrows furrow together, as his lips part a little. He then places his hands on the bed and pushes his hips further inside you - yet, his eyes jerk from your cunt to your face, at which he looks almost drunk-like; his very much own twists in pleasure. His eyes furrow again, but this time he looks into your eyes; his gaze is so intense that when you look closely enough you can see his pupils dilating. Rin hisses and moans, biting his bottom lip and drawing blood by accident. His eyes close and he grunts once he feels like he's balls deep inside you.

he hisses every time you clench on him, and I'm not even making it up. his dick is so sensitive (or so he thinks) that he can’t think properly; the way your walls hug him so tightly drives him insane. he’s about to sob when he feels like he’s gonna cum, Rin completely loses himself and his thrusts become erratic, yet faster at the same time; he just needs that sweet release and he’ll do ANYTHING to get it.

Going a little back to the jacking off headcanons. He gets horny at random times of the day, usually in the evening when he has his free time. You two could cuddle and watch a movie, then suddenly he's nuzzling his head into your chest or kissing your neck; "I'm sorry, I've been holding myself back all day... I know you're tired, but please, just today okay? I'll make it up to you, I promise." Then nuzzles his cheek into yours softly. He does feel bad whenever his horny brain starts acting up, but if he says that he'll make it up... He will. And twice as much.

Speaking about making up, he’s gonna try to scare you with his teeth. Not literally, but he’ll tease you by biting your coochie a little. not painfully, it’s more for shits and giggles if he’s in the mood. he’ll bite you here and there, especially your sensitive clit; the feeling of his massive teeth is surely different than normal, human ones. he likes to use hit tongue too, and believe me he can flicker that fucking tongue so fast against your pearl to the point that he’s disappointed you came so fast.

on days that he feels more gentle and less like teasing you, he’s gonna press tiny kisses on your exposed cunt. he ALWAYS finishes oral with the final kiss on your pubic crease and then lies on you with his head on your chest, so you can play with his hair. good boy deserves a reward, doesn’t he?

it’s always so cute how he gets horny. he tends to stick to you a lot, and if he’s desperate in public, he’ll take advantage every time if you happen to stay in front of him, so he can press his hardness against your ass. Rin in general gets really subby and leans to your touch, even if it's just you touching his face like caressing his cheek. Speaking about cheeks! They get that rosy color, his behavior changes too - he appears tired to others, but.. he isn’t tired by any means. He WANTS to get tired. His eyes seem heavy and somewhat half-lidded, and his tail is “for some reason” always near you, teasing you with its tip, sometimes even sneaking under your shirt and drawing invisible patterns on your back.

literally, he’s just looking at you like:

don't judge him, he’s just horny.

jokes aside, he has really pretty balls. will I elaborate on this one? no. why? everyone considers “pretty” differently, so I leave this one for your own imagination. 

we’ve talked about his tail, but let's talk about his pointy ears. they’re sensitive too, but not as much as the tail. Rin loves ear massages, but usually, you end up with him rubbing his thighs in shame. He feels guilty for being aroused, since all you wanted to do was to get rid of the stress he had, but oh well.

this man. THIS MAN. SIT ON HIS FACE. in fact, not only there. he’ll eat you out like a starving man. he likes having you on top of him and watching you bounce on his dick; he’s gonna play with your tits, knead them, kiss them, whatever he’s able to do, really, especially if he’s lying on his back - he’s addicted to that sight and often encourages you to ride him, considering that you can have your own pace as well. that was the longest sentence ever, anyway.

cuddlefuck? cuddlefuck. just casually doing nothing and suddenly he’s kissing all over you and trying to tease you through your panties.

here I present you me thirsting:

do you see his fucking back? these m u s c l e s? Kato's fucking testing me BUT HERE I GO.

If he notices you simping over his back? oh baby he’s gonna tease you so bad. mostly for shits and giggles, but he WILL take his hoodies/shirts off just to flex. he enjoys if you run your hands down his back when he’s shirtless. if you have acrylic nails, oh boy scratch his back anytime. he LOVES the feeling of acrylics.

wash his back?? massage his shoulders?? he’s GONE. sleeps instantly but you have an occasion to touch that muscles all you want.

okay but.. him showering?? how water droplets run down his back?? I am DECEASED

not really into fucking in the shower cus he’s afraid he might slip, (that’s probably happened already...) but petting? teasing your pussy? his hands slowly moving upwards and playing with your nipples while he stands behind you? you don’t have to ask twice. in fact, not at all. showering with him never ends up with either of you being actually clean.

he’s tried to tease your slit with his tail once. you ended up laughing your ass off because instead of getting more turned on, you started to laugh because it tickled you. Rin? eMBARRASSED. almost started crying with his dick rock hard.

[bastardtetsu]

Oh yay so here's my drabble request!

Character: Suga

Body part: neck

Time of day: 11pm

Spicy 🔥

f!reader 💗

(Also I'm confirming that I'm 20+ so you won't feel uncomfortable writing it!)

eeeee thank you for this request nonnie !! & thanks for confirming ur age, i do appreciate it <3 hope u enjoy !

ima also tag queen suga fucker miss @heauxzenji bc it would be wrong of me not to ;)

—suga + neck + 11:00pm

++ warnings: smut (18+), reader is blindfolded + handcuffed, fingering (coochi AND mouth!), slight overstimulation // wc: 497

warm breath ghosts over the side of your neck, eliciting a shuddered sigh from your parted lips. suga's plush lips just barely graze your skin, teasing around your jugular while his delicate hands reach around to play with your exposed tits.

he’s been toying with you like this for lord knows how long. you can feel his cock tenting in his pants against your ass as you kneel in from of him, back pinned against his clothed chest & feet tucked underneath your parted thighs, completely naked except for a blindfold, a pair of handcuffs securing your wrists in front of you, and a thin lacy g-string that barely covers your aching, glistening cunt.

a sudden tug at your scalp cocks your head sharply to the side, baring even more of your neck to the silver-haired man as he grips your hair in his fist. you gasp in surprise when you feel his tongue licking a wet stripe up the vulnerable skin, all the way to your earlobe, where he begins to nibble gently. the needy sighs slipping through your lips are starting to sound more like breathy whimpers by the second, much to your lover’s satisfaction.

“koshi…” you breathe desperately as his hand finally ventures down between your legs, easily pulling aside the thin garment and exposing your dripping sex.

“hush, angel,” he coos softly against your ear. his other hand moves to press fingers into your mouth, bearing down on your tongue while he starts to play with your neglected, puffy clit. “i’m gonna take care of you, promise.”

before you know it his lips are flush against your neck, sucking marks into your skin while his deft fingers pleasure you from both ends. wanton moans fly uncontrollably from your open mouth and you feel your covered eyes begin to roll back into your head, wave after wave of pleasure washing over you with increasing strength as you careen towards your high. your hole clenches around nothing, begging for a release as his fingers speed up their ministrations, skillfully circling your clit while you gag on the ones being shoved further into your mouth.

the warm, wet sensation of suga’s tongue laving generous circles on the side of your neck is what sends you over the edge. your body shakes in his arms as you reach your bliss, your lover humming contentedly into your neck while his fingers continue their motions until you ride out your orgasm—and then some more, because he just adores seeing you twitch from the slight overstimulation.

drool runs down your chin as he removes his fingers, both hands now coated with your fluids. he brings them back to your chest, circling your nipples with the lubricated digits. you twitch at the sudden chill when the air hits your wet buds, a gasp catching in your throat, still breathless after your first orgasm. suga chuckles lightly, grazing the shell of your ear with his whispered breath:

“that was one."

200 follower bbq - now closed

[sems-diarie]

Sleepover timeee, HC for Deku and Hawks please .3.

.3. *mwah* we stayin’ up all night bwayybee

i just had this convo earlier, but izuku is a tiddie man!! wear a tank top w a little (lot) bit of cleavage and SEE HOW HE FOLD

he physically cannot keep his eyes off the voluptuous curve of da tiddie, no matter what size, mind you—

every time he looks at you, his face burns pink. he’ll try to stutter his way through a sentence—he was trying to tell you something important—but eventually has to throw in the towel before he passes out.

the first time you ask him to squeeze your boobies, he definitely gets those ꩜ thingies in his eyes. (i had to make it green bc his eyes are green lmao 😭)

hawks is the type to eat coochie from the back. he likes how depraved you look, drooling face down into a pillow, booty shaking in the air, and your little hole clenching around his tongue, teehee

[revelaare]

Shit said in the Crimson Discord & VC, taken out of context part 2, (the sequel)

Big NSFW warning, probably

his meat slid off and then slid right back on

[PRONOUN] can punch me in my uterus and make a hammock out of my ovaries

it’s one of the worst fucking things i’ve ever heard, and i’ve heard someone literally shit their pants

they tagged me and my ass clenched

this man just said “I want to eat ur ass and then kiss you” ok buddy

a man with a plan

my grandpa is texting his hoes from his flip phone

god my lawyer was a hit but idk if she will be the chosen one or not

hello give me your toenails

i'll touch you in a non-weird way

he was in that movie with the people, he was the human.

i want her to brush my hair

If we have dick glasses they have to be of the highest quality for the best experience

i don't wanna watch that white nonsense

i would throat him like a fine wine

these millenials can't live without ac? back in my day we lived on the sun

yall better put those goats on a wheel, tell them to start running

he looks like a bitch

yes or no, u wud punch the light bulb out of thomas edisons wrinkly pruned hand and asked him if he believed in god

still has skin and a working body

i needed to wait until my voice changes

you thought i was snacking on joe biden’s savory meat stick

barack guckin oglizzy, oguckma, barack osugma, Joe choden, OglchnnngggHHHYynnUUUnnghhma

why did i have a dream that i was taking the lid off my car

false gods require wine, real gods require coochiefice

fettucine wet ass pussy

that was all you sent me. the picture of a raccoon and then nothing

it isn’t hate, it is ‘continuously let down by’.

i never went to school who science

i’m gunna go peer pressure my mum into a shot

thank you for furthering my career at hot topic

i will suck the ingrown hair off of him

it has huge jackman in it

i chomped on this eggshell, got my calcium in for the day

i will take you to touch the mango

i want to see all the big things

[PRONOUN] has collar bones so deep you could hook a clothing hanger into it

no asscheeks in fucking family chat you animals

he will eat you alive and suck out your intestines like its a spaghetti noodle

[NAMES]’s Tiggle Biddie’s

dropped acid, cried the whole night.

my stomach is hooping and hollering, i’m about to eat some sleep

you want my throatsac ??

please dont know me as the toenail eater

you have to keep the skin on one side while you eat the other, thats basic mango physics

i mean he is some good sasuage

calm down dick Hannibal

respectfully, what the fuck is this

tbf i only eat my steaks where they need tampons

you committed acts of culinary terrorism

does your refrigerator whimper and cower in the corner when you approach it. that's your fridge trying to use echo location to locate a safe space

thundercuck

i almost met Jesus, I almost got an autograph. Almost got a greatest hits signed album.

respectfully, are you smoking fucking crack?

my left testicle could play better than you

i’ll eat him with ketchup

son of a biscuit eating bulldog!

now it’s back to me sucking, all is right in the world.

holy fuck weasels.

holy fuck, weasels!

why does the bad guy look like the Statue of Liberty?

this is a man that sometimes willingly dresses like a lumberjack

and me, being an emotional cripple, must make jokes about this.

hey my name is [NAME] i'm **definitely** who i say i am

[NAME OR PRONOUN] offered a back massage by calling it the “tickle thing”

i love a man who puts his parents in a nursing home.

my brain is going to take a hot shower

wait have u seen steve harvey's coochie

if it were me i would simply not be pregnant

look im not about to be out here saying i love [NAME OR PRONOUN] feet, but i am about to be out here saying that their feet are some of the nicest feet i've seen in a long time

i named my cloyster renesmee

[NAME] was texting me from the bathtub

you’re pregnant? That’s unfortunate.

do I say dumb shit? Perhaps. Do I take ownership? Perhaps.

i pay for things in blissful ignorance

i am an emotional vagrant

i am an emotional fragrance

to make a long motherfucking story short...

this enchilada tastes like asshole and sadness

you are not an ugly bitch, you’re just a bitch

that’s not a nut shot, buddy.

i’m sad because i sucked the meat off of this pumpkin spice latte

i want to make a blanket out of his eyebrows

what are you disgracing my Christian eyes for?

he be looking at that dick like why does it go so much to the left?

I want her to record an audio book for me so I can fall asleep listening to her voice.

Can I lick you like an ice cream cone? Asking for science.

like you're out to lunch with your bromie and you're eating some rubens or something and you wistfully look over the rim of your sunglasses and just: You ever buss 2 fast

my accent is flaccid

timotay chalamaymay’s sweet ass

on the bright side mcallister’s gave me 3 pickle spears. Almost enough to make a whole pickle.

you think they came from the same mommy pickle?

HIS DOODLE IS OUT

i thot that meant [NAME] wanted to...doodle his noodle

i don’t use commas, i don't respect u enough, fuck ur reading comprehension.

does australia have seasons

i want someone to embalm my body with mcdonalds sprite

his hermione grangina

purrrr my last email

its lore locked beneath 30 layers. u can only understand it if uve had a near death experience

LET'S GET FUCKY

i wanna have the heart of a stoner

his man titties look like little tattooed pillows

SWIGGITY SWOOTY COMIN FOR THAT BOOTY

there were no cheeks to shake. nothing to clap. no noise to be had from her literal slices of wonderbread

u ever just fuck around and ur tits fart

put a lil mint leaf on it for authenticity

alright brother god bless may u be fertile

i feel like im being advocated for something i shouldnt be advocating for

and i am adam with my fat pendulous balls lol

i’m making whuppie with whoopie godberg

theodore tits fart rex

yeah man do u also have the third toe on ur shoulder

the green spaghetti monster is coming for me and i can't blame him

today i learned starfish do not poop

that was nothing compared to some other things I saw

listen I'd willingly watch [NAME/PRONOUN] in a cell for 24 hours. Imagine that sounded less creepy

i'd lick a dirty flip flop off her abs

i’m tempted to show you all the gravity defining boobs, maybe tomorrow

my brain is on vacation

good morning! i ate breakfast and im ready to go to bed

tape the titty in

ive unironically had nightmares with [NAME] in them

the peanut in the auditory canal

so far this feel all comfortable, does this all make sense?

i know it's kind of a schlep to get through

nail polish or no nail polish for the shower?

and then he saw those big tt honkerz... and it all went down hill from there

can y’all stop chanting curses in the chat my furniture is stuck on the ceiling

EH?! CIAO? HELLO??

in Russia this is not ok 

i can’t buy pants here on Sunday either

IT'S LIKE TWELVE THOUSAND DOLLARS TO EAT ON A SOGGY PANCAKE

imagine me going up to [NAME/PRONOUN] and being like i love the way ur flesh smells

in a supermarket. The sickly blue light where humans congregate. Animal human masses. Nameless faces. Whole lives boiled into generalized categories like "asshole who definitely does need 4 boxes of cheerios". Yout hink and realize while stabding in line u didnt grab the bag of frozen peas...but its 2 late

its truly the only picture that gives me pure joy

are weasels real

my work mum just messaged me the phrase "use your booty call wisely" with no context

"let's bring u to the mustache chair"

If you’re not doing coke under the coke sign what is the point?

[seijch]

send me selfship questions!!

for @raevaioli because i wrote too much the first time and didnt have space to answer everything else 🧍🏻‍♂️

(there’s a lot of shit under the cut NDJKDKS be Warned)

1. where was your first date?

well, youve already heard about the first date that we realized was indeed A Date with futakuchi, but my first Proper Date with him would have to be somewhere like an arcade where we can have fun but still talk?? personally movie (theater) dates aren’t good first dates bc you Have to stay silent until the movie is over?? what’s the APPEAL...

there’s a shared exhale of relief as the large stuffed pokemon gets dropped by the crane into the pickup zone. “i can’t believe you pulled that off,” i tell him.

“you know, just for that, i’m keeping it.”

“you don’t even like pokemon! what happened to ‘this one’s for you, baby?’” i ask, voice dropping an octave to imitate him.

“i never said that, first of all. second of all,” he continues, grip tightening on the rowlet, “i won it. so it’s mine.”

“you fucking suck.”

(he says all this, yet when he drops me off, he insists i take the rowlet with me and name it after him. i graciously oblige, dubbing it coochie jr.)

when it comes to kuroo, he probably Says it’s some kind of unplanned affair but it ends with him unloading a picnic basket as we watch the sun set bc he’s a SAP... hate that fool 😔

“you’ve got good taste in music,” i tell him as the next song on his playlist begins. he’s definitely planning something, but i don’t say anything as his driving becomes less aimless.

“oh, i know,” he grins. “good enough for you to ask me for recommendations, i’d say.”

i’m crossing my arms before his sentence gets to finish. “listen,” i start, “you can’t tell me it didn’t work. we’re together now, aren’t we?” he doesn’t choose to grace that with a response.

before we know it, kuroo’s parked the car. “we’re here.”

“here? at the park? what are you gonna do, hold my hand while we watch the sunset?” i tease, getting out of the car. he doesn’t respond. “tetsu?”

“you really think you know me, don’t you?” he appears from the other side, picnic basket in hand and a resigned smile on his face. “what do you suggest we do now that my surprise has been torn to shreds, hm?”

“i mean...can we still eat? i’m kinda hungry.” i point to the basket. (i’m clearly deflecting ,, i was Not expecting kuroo the simp to jump out so early and my heart Cannot Take It)

2. who normally plans the dates?

between me and futakuchi i’m going to say none of us! we don’t really go on Dates dates, it’s just Us Hanging Out !! with kuroo, at first it’s him tbh but after we get comfortable everything becomes a date... idk tbh i’m not the type to sweat that kind of thing 🕺🏻 i do like to Go Out and do things w my s/o no matter who they are but a date doesn’t always have to be going out nor does it have to be a Special going out yk??

3. what kind of dates would you two mostly go on? do you have a “date spot?”

i mentioned this in my answer for 24, but w kuchi we have this ritual of going out to eat every friday and after we get together that doesn’t change!!! if we’re feeling extra lazy we might order takeout but we always always spend our friday nights together... it’s def smth we look forward to even Before we start dating (and it’s smth we both wonder Why we anticipate before we get tgt)

in terms of a date spot? we have our favorite places (like the ramen joint i mentioned in 24) but other than that maybe a few other restaurants and that’s kinda it! our other dates are the occasional study date but i cannot study when he’s around,, just looking at his face pisses me off 😃 nah but we can’t focus on school together + we’d get heated over a meaningless argument and get kicked out NDNSJSJ

when we get domestic w each other (like in uni or beyond) kuroo and i have all our dates at the grocery store... idk abt you but the INTIMACY of buying groceries w someone you love is so [clenches fist] yk?? but before and sometimes after that point rlly it’s like Things To See and Things To Do whenever kuroo puts himself in charge of planning it bc he knows we both like to be engaged and have fun!! (i alr said it but our date spot is the grocery store <3)

4. what kind of date do you think the both of you would enjoy the most? why?

that’s a very good question... i mentioned it alr but kuroo and i vibe heavy w things that are engaging and give us things to talk about while we keep busy,, like maybe an amusement park or smth w all the rides (we’re definitely spinning the shit out of the teacups) mostly bc i think he likes being kept on his toes and i do too! i think we’d challenge each other to do better by setting an example for the other to follow just in general,, also ngl places w a lot of ppl are good too so we can peoplewatch,, the two of us are the type to read people with a glance and when we need downtime we’d sit down somewhere and just kinda . 👁👁 yk

“i might barf,” i announce, gait crooked from the dizzying ride.

“no, you won’t,” kuroo replies, allowing me to drape myself over him though he’s not walking straight either. “didn’t you hear? vomitting is banned in this country and thirteen others.”

“a shame. anyway, let’s go on the pirate ship ride next.”

(we sit at the outer edge. it’s not a good time for the folks in the two seats in front of us. we wipe our vomit—mostly my vomit—from the corners of our mouths and apologize profusely.)

when it comes to kuchi, i think he’d like smth where we would end up competing against each other! i mentioned this when i answered question 50, but kenji and i are almost TOO competitive over stupid shit so smth like laser tag (where everyone is like ... why don’t you want to work together aren’t you DATING) would be SO fucking fun

“it’s not too late to surrender,” he simpers, my body sandwiched between his and the wall. my gun’s been knocked out of my hand—that’s gotta be against the fucking rules—and part of me feels like i’m on a real battlefield, as fleeting the thought is. “some battles, you just can’t win.” he punctuates this statement with a sage nod, leaning so close his breath fans against my face. “so, what’ll it be?”

i close the gap, pressing my lips against his and relishing in the strangled groan that comes from the back of his throat as he reciprocates, free hand moving to the nape of my neck. the hand holding the gun drops. that’s all the opening i need.

i let him deepen the kiss, take his bottom lip between my teeth and gently tug as my hands reach for his gun while his brain is still between his legs.

aim. fire.

i’m the last one standing, and the lights turn on around us. “it’s always good to have goals,” i tell him, granting him a consolation peck to the lips. “but i suggest making them more realistic next time.”

9. what do you think your first impression of them would be?

now THIS is a question i knew the answer to going in bc my best friend (honestly she doesn’t get paid enough ,, or at all ,, for all the shit she has to put up w from me NDNSKSK) had to hear all abt my elaborate fantasies regarding these two but!!

my first impression of kuroo is 1) 😳😳 and more importantly, 2) I Want To Know What He’s About... bc he’s not the kind of person i’d get the full picture of w just one look and maybe a few words spoken? he’d pique my interest a LOT (and this is smth he shares w tsukishima, tho i don’t see myself in a long lasting relationship w him like i do w kuroo and kuchi!) and i’d end up worming my way into his life whether he likes it or not until i find out :-)

unlike kuroo i see kenji and go Wow. What An Asshole. ok no i don’t NDNSJSN i probably think he’s cute first THEN go what an asshole and there’s definitely a long period of time where we’re genuinely getting on each other’s nerves before it goes into the romantic relationship-adjacent dynamic you see in my answer to 24!

10. what do you think their first impression of you would be?

kuroo’s definitely curious. i don’t imagine him being unable to see thru me from the start but i prove myself to be Good Conversation so he’s fine (and ends up being more than fine) with me bothering him as much as i do. kenji probably sees me the way i think most people see me at first? very soft and sweet ,, and then he tries to rile me up, tries to test the waters and pretty quickly finds out that right under the nice girl is someone that won’t hesitate to mirror the shit he tries to dish out.

(again) 24. would you confess first or would they? how would it have gone?

i saw you said in the tags you wanted to see the kuroo one so here it is 🤝 i had all my fun writing kenji’s so this one is shorter than that but!!!

NDNSNSN anyway !!! with kuroo it’s kinda 50/50 bc i’m not shy when it comes to my feelings but at the same time i like to have the lowest chances possible for failure when it comes to things like this... but i simp SO heavy for him so lbr it’ll prob be me just bc i literally Cannot pretend that my intentions are platonic anymore and he’s not gonna do it first (later i find out he was trying to see how long he could go before one of us mentioned the elephant in the room)

(5:38 PM) me: anyway for the weekly song rec

(5:38 PM) me: khalid ft. john mayer - outta my head

(5:39 PM) me: specifically 1:16-1:25 :-)

the messages have sent before i can think twice or even consult anyone about it. there’s a beat of silence. then two. then three. i throw my phone down onto the bed as it bounces off the mattress and onto the carpet.

what the fuck!!!!!! bitch why did you do that!!!!!!!

there’s no taking it back now. he reads it ten minutes after it sends (not like anyone’s checking, that would be preposterous). the picture i took of him mid-sneeze two months ago lights up the screen, a facetime call from shithead 👺 bringing me to yet another crossroads. do i answer it and face the music (literally), or do i pretend to have been busy and act as though i didn’t just confess to one of my best friends through text and with music, of all things?

i pick up the call.

“i liked the song,” he says as soon as the call opens, “though i can’t help but wonder if there was a hidden meaning to it.”

“and if i told you there was?”

“well,” he replies, sounding a little out of breath (where is he?), “i’d tell you to open your door because i’m outside.”

true enough, when i race downstairs and open the door, he’s waiting for me. “and if i told you that was my way of asking you to be my boyfriend?”

“well, i think i’d want to ask if i could kiss you. assuming, of course, it was alright to do something like that so soon-“

he doesn’t finish his sentence. his lips are a little bit chapped, but pleasant nonetheless, and i tuck the newfound fact away in my file of things i know about kuroo tetsurou.

(for reference, the song lyrics for the part i mention are can you feel the tension / you’ve got my attention / i know we’re just friends but / i’d rather be together instead)