#college assignments and exams n shit- i promised to pay for her college if something were to happen with her scholarship

[dhampir-dyke]

I know it's bad to want a relationship to "fix" you but I genuinely was better off mentally and emotionally when I was in a relationship- and not in the 'listen to all my problems and be my therapist' way but the 'you make me feel like I'm not alone in the world and you make me want to be a better person for both our sakes' way. I wanna be able to share my struggles with another person but also take theirs as well.

[rosesbxrry]

𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐞

𝔼𝕟𝕙𝕪𝕡𝕖𝕟 𝕧𝕒𝕞𝕡𝕚𝕣𝕖 𝔸𝕌 𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕤

You really didn’t want to come to the party that Jay threw in his mansion. Not because you have not started studying for the upcoming calculus exam, but your ex-boyfriend would definitely be there since they are in the same circle of friends. Avoiding him throughout the party was harder than you thought but you stood there, wide eyes, staring at Heeseung with blood on his mouth and hands.

Pairing: Heeseung X Fem! human Reader

Genre: Smut 🔞 (Minors DNI), slight angst, slight fluff, exes to lovers 

Warnings: mention of blood, kidnapping, very heavy alcohol consumption, lots of profanity and cursing, smut warnings under the read more

Word count: 13,708 words

Series masterlist

Smut warnings: lots of sexual tension, Heeseung being somewhat a soft dom, oral (male receiving), dry humping, dacryphilia, praising (female receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, Heeseung being sexual frustrated and horny as heck, reader being Heeseung’s greatest weakness, hopefully I didn’t miss out anything else. 

Author’s note: It would be better to read Jungwon’s installment first since there will be references to that. 

You refuse to believe that vampires are real.

For God sake it was the only thing people were talking about among the students lately. Ryujin and Winter seemed very engrossed on the topic as they chewed on their lunch.

In contrast, you were very stressed out. People are busy worrying and being afraid of the supernatural while you are in a dilemma about a real life crisis.

Math was not your strong skill, especially when calculus is involved. Failing the upcoming exam, to you, is way scarier than a fictional myth that was spread for shits and giggles.

“Are you even listening, y/n?”

“Hmm.”

Ryujin and Winter glance at each other as they anxiously stare at you picking on the mac and cheese with a fork, an obvious frown on your lips. Winter signals something to Ryujin with her eyes, in which the latter nodded, leaning into you closer.

Ryujin gives you a reassuring smile. “Hey, don’t worry about the exam okay? Look at the bright side! You can always retake it―ouch!”

Ryujin let out a yelp of pain when Winter kicked her in the shin under the table, a death glare evident towards the blonde who was clueless towards what she had done.

You groan as you lay your head against the table, ruffling your hair in frustration. How were you supposed to pass this exam with such little time? Was this your punishment for the lack of time management that you slipped past the fact that you had an exam in four days?

Maybe Ryujin’s right for once. At least if you retake it, you’ll have enough time to study harder. But that means paying to do the resit, which, as a broke college student, was not an option as well.

“Umm…you don’t really have to go to the party, you know?” Winter reassured, patting you on the head for comfort.

“No, no, I promise I’ll go. We’ve been planning to go right? I just can’t back out now.” You said, blowing on the piece of hair blocking your view as you sat up from your seat.

“If you say so. Oh yeah, one more thing I need to tell you―” Winter spoke out before you cut her off.

“Oh shit, I forgot!” You exclaimed hurriedly to them while you packed your stuff, stacking up trash and the plate of untouched mac and cheese on your food plate.

How can you forget that you had to meet with professor Baek today about an assignment? Things were not going great for you this week.

“I’m sorry I have to go! I’ll see you guys later for the party!”

With one hand hugging your stack of books while the other balancing the food tray, you juggle the two as you walk-off the table to put the tray away.

You turn to a corner only to bump into a group of guys, particularly the person in front of you.

Thankfully you didn’t fall and the fact that the guy held onto the food tray before it got knocked down gave you a sense of relief. Well, until you realize the bowl of mac and cheese has toppled over the edge and onto the guy’s shirt.

You cringe out of embarrassment, cursing at how the world was against you at this time and moment.

“Shit!—I’m sorry, I—”

The moment you lock eyes with a familiar pair of doe eyes, you wish to crawl into a hole and never come out of it. Someone please save you from the humiliations and make you disappear from the Earth’s surface because you had just bump into your ex-boyfriend, Lee Heeseung.

And you spilled mac and cheese all over his shirt.

Horrified? It does not even come close to describing how you feel right now. With mouth agape and dumbfounded by the situation, you were frozen from your spot and you couldn’t think of a word to say right now.

Your fight and flight response kicks in and just like any other embarrassed person, your flight response takes over.

The moment pass by like a lighting strike and you found yourself literally running out of the cafeteria door. 

You didn’t take in Heeseung or he’s group of friend’s reactions. They were probably as embarrassed as you are. 

You can’t believe you left him hanging there with your food tray still on his hand, mac and cheese attached to his shirt.

By the time you’ve arrived at professor Baek’s office room, you were as red as a tomato while reassuring him that the cause of it was due to the summer’s heat. 

Heeseung casually walked over to where Jay, Jake and Sunghoon’s table were, having come out of the washroom to clean his shirt after the mac and cheese situation. 

Jay looked over and pointed at his damp shirt. “That’s gonna stain.”

“Dude, seriously, you knew she was at the corner. Why did you let her bump into you?” Jake questioned, chewing down on his sandwich, though he grimaced slightly after swallowing it.

It was all an act. Human food was not necessarily a bad thing for a vampire. But their body will reject it and the boys find it not as appetizing anymore compared to when they were human, except for Jay, who was born a vampire and had never enjoyed human food to begin with. 

“She literally went hit and run on us.” Sunghoon commented. 

“I mean I would. Imagine spilling mac and cheese on your ex.” Jake said, a tone of understanding. 

“Well this could have been avoided if someone used their vampire senses and dodge.” Jay explained, staring right through Heeseung. 

The said male shrugged, not knowing the reason why as well. He knew you were around the corner, sensing you were about to turn in a frenzy and crash onto him. But he was frozen as well.

Maybe it’s the little selfish feeling in him of wanting a reason to see you again.

How long has it been since the both of you broke up, almost three months? Heeseung can’t remember clearly. All he knows is that he had broken two years worth of relationship with the person he was still in love with. The reason? Well, things are complicated when you’re a vampire.

The other three males look at each other in understanding when Heeseung doesn’t respond. It was obvious to them that he still had feelings for you.

The way he’s eyes will follow you wherever you are in his view, longingly staring whenever you laugh or smile from afar. It didn’t go unnoticed to them, though Heeseung stubbornly denied all their accusations, insisting he had moved on.

But it was a choice he made the moment he knew the dangers of being a vampire.

It was a choice that hurt him, and you, for the sake of your safety.

“You guys are literally the worst.” You whined, sitting at the back of the passenger seat while Ryujin and Winter were staring back at you with apologetic looks.

The three of you have arrived at the party’s destination. You could already see the flashing lights inside the mansion, the silhouette of drunken students dancing to some god awful songs.

There was already random stuff thrown left and right at the front porch and roof top; confetti, newspapers, toilet papers and egg cartons? 

Anyways, you were excited for the party until Ryujin pulled in front of Jay’s mansion did you found yourself in confusion. It was then they drop you a huge bomb which leads to the situation now.

“Why didn’t you tell me that the party belongs to Jay Park, aka my ex-boyfriend’s best friend!” 

Winter winces at the way you whisper yelled at them while Ryujin looked at you with the most oh shit face ever.

“We were gonna tell you y/n. It’s just that the timing wasn’t right.” Winter tried to explain.

“Maybe you should have told me before we left the dorm?!!”

You were already losing your mind. The incident during lunch at the cafeteria this afternoon was still fresh in your mind. Oh god you had to face Heeseung again and you don’t know if you can take this amount of embarrassment in one day.

“Calm down y/n,” Ryujin reasoned, her voice lace with optimism. “maybe there’s a chance that he might not come?”

You gave Ryujin the most deadpanned look. “No. When there’s Jay Park, there will always be Heeseung as well.”

You watch Ryujin open her mouth to contradict but soon closes it when she realizes you were right. You raise an eyebrow at her, challenging her to elaborate in which the blonde couldn’t.

“Welp, there’s a burger joint at a gas station down the road. Should we go there instead?” Ryujin suggested.

You shook your head, a sigh of remorse escaped your lips for cock blocking their fun. It wasn't right of you to not let them, your best friends, have some fun just because you didn’t want to see your ex.

This was definitely something you need to move on and not be childish or toxic about. Plus, there was free alcohol and you knew Jay had the best in town. If you were to suffer, at least you can indulge yourself with some nice liquor.

“We’re already here right?, might as well just go in already.”

You rolled your eyes when Ryujin yelled in triumph, arms in the air with a wide grin on her face, her suggestion before this came flying out the window the second you cave in.

“Let’s go party losers!”

You and Winter glance at each other, a playful smirk exchange between each other as the three of you unbuckle your seat belts, heading towards the front entrance of the mansion.

The living room was as spacious as you remember. Back then, Heeseung would often bring you here to hang out with the others; mainly Jake, Sunghoon and Jay, with the courtesy of the owner himself of course.

It was here that you spent a lot of time together with Heeseung; watching movies, playing games and sometimes when it gets too late into the night, there was a spare room you shared with him where you would cuddle and chat for hours until the both of you would sleep in each other’s arms.

You shook your head after reminiscing the bittersweet memories. Were you really getting all sappy in the middle of a party? Sure it was definitely the happiest memory with him, but you had to pull yourself together because the reality was, you guys aren’t together anymore.

What hit the nail on the head further was the fact that you see him sitting at one of the sofas, a cup on hand while a girl was dragging him to his feet, probably begging him to dance with her as a grin was plastered on her happy face.

“I’m gonna go get a drink.” you said.

Winter didn’t stop you as you marched away from the scene into the hallway.

She saw what you had seen, watching you with a look of worry on her face as you disappeared. But Winter knows that you’ll probably need some time to think for yourself thus, she lets you go alone.

To be honest, it did hurt a little.

But it’s over between the two of you. You had no right to be jealous of the girl but you couldn’t help but realize that you’ll never get over him after seeing that.

Fuck. You need some alcohol.

It didn’t take you too long to arrive at the kitchen; you knew the place like the back of your hand. There were tons of beverages at the tables and islands, but you knew where Jay had placed his most prized liquor and you didn’t hesitate to open the cupboard under the sink.

You have to thank and apologize to Jay the next time you see him.

“Boo!”

You yelp in surprise when you almost spilled the drink while pouring it into a cup. The person who scared you laughed aloud, his voice familiar to you as it echoed throughout the empty kitchen.

“Fuck off Ni-ki” you whine in annoyance.

The male had a wide grin on his face as he hops onto the kitchen counter beside you. Honestly, it was annoying how sneaky he can be and the fact that you couldn’t feel or hear him approaching you from a distance was quite terrifying.

“Gosh, let your liver breathe for a chance would you?” he teased, obviously referring to the alcohol in your hand.

You gave him a sarcastic smirk. “Why are you here? Isn’t it past your bedtime? Where's Sunoo to tuck you in?”

He scrunched his face and stuck his tongue at you in retaliation.

“I’m assuming this is a reaction after seeing Heeseung just now?” Ni-ki said and you immediately gave him an icy sharp glare as the male put his hands up in defeat.

“Don’t even go there.” You hiss.

Ni-ki was nonchalant about your death glare and threatening words; only leaning closer as if he was about to spill a secret to you.

“Just something to add,” his words now attract your attention as you perk up your ears to listen closely. “You shouldn’t worry too much about the girl you saw with him in the living room.”

You snort at what he said, sipping on the liquid in the cup. “Would you say the same thing as Kim Hari?”

Ni-ki winced at the name mentioned. “I can’t guarantee you with that one. She’s a persistent one.”

Kim Hari. She was a girl who had her eyes on Heeseung even at the beginning of your relationship with him. Though she knew he had a girlfriend, which was you, it didn’t stop her from blatantly flirting with him.

You hated the fact that she knew Heeseung had a girlfriend, knew that he was uncomfortable with her advances, yet she continues to do so in order to get under your skin.

The only thing holding you back from potentially choking her was the fact that you trusted Heeseung, and he also reassures you that he had told her off multiple times. Honestly, that was the only thing keeping you sane.

But now that everyone knows about your breakup with Heeseung, rumours circulated that Kim Hari and Heeseung had been spotted together and that they were hooking up.

You didn’t care if he really did hook up with her after. The both of you had ended your relationship and he was a free man; he wasn’t obligated to you anymore.

It was still stupid rumours coming from the mouth of students but boy did that shit hurt when you heard it.

“What else do you want from me?” you sigh at Ni-ki as he still had that shit eating grin on his face even after telling the piece of information.

“Do you wanna play a game?”

You watch the empty glass bottle spin and spin, the opening end of the bottle stops and points at the person sitting opposite of you.

You let out a breath of relief as everyone around you laughs and teases San as he drinks a shot of soju; unable or unwilling to answer the question given to him.

You had gotten yourself into a sticky game of truth or shot; a made up alternative game of spin the bottle where whoever got chosen had to pick whether to answer a truth or take a shot of soju instead.

In a normal setting, you would be having a blast right now. But unfortunately, you took a sneaky glance at Heeseung as he drank from his cup; sitting at a sofa with his signature man spread, an amused smirk on his face as he watched San take a shot.

Why did he have to participate as well? If you knew, you would have booked it right there and then. But, you had made your presence known to the group of people playing and if you leave now….why do you have to succumb to peer pressure?

You have to remember to punch Ni-ki in the face next time you see him.

In the middle of the game, you text Ryujin and Winter to come and rescue you but the two of them somehow got involved as well, meaning you were screwed if the bottle points to you.

You and Heeseung basically have a bull’s eye on your forehead right now, your past relationship could be the source for the truth given when either of you are chosen by that stupid glass bottle of beer.

Whatever happens, you thought, the shot of soju sounds better.

“Let me spin the bottle next!”

Choi San grabbed the bottle, spinning it in the middle of the floor. It spins and spins until it stops at, lord and behold, Lee Heeseung sitting on the sofa.

The moment San makes eye contact with you across the room, a mischievous smirk and a teasing glint on his eyes, you knew you were fucked.

“Who’s a better kisser? Hari or y/n?”

Everyone in the room immediately burst into a group of whistling and howling, obviously enjoying the little scandalous question. Dread immediately washed over you, glancing as Heeseung stared at the floor with a hard look.

Please just take the shot of soju, please just take the shot of soju; you chanted in your head in desperation.

But when he looked up to make eye contact with you, his eyes reminded you of the first time he confessed to you with so much affection and adoration, you were stunned the moment he said your name.

“y/n.”

You hear the sound of people talking in excitement, some exclaim in surprise as they start to whisper to one another; glancing back and forth between you and Heeseung.

You drown out their voices. You were staring back at Heeseung, his gaze at you never left the moment he said your name. You find it hard to breathe and the next thing you know, you abruptly stood up and walked away when you saw his mouth opening to say something else.

You heard Winter calling you out as you left and Ryunjin’s loud voice as she shouts ‘asshole’ towards the doe eyed male causing the ruckus in the room.

Your legs subconsciously drag your body away towards an empty room. You slide down and rest your back against the hard door after entering, curling up and hugging your legs to your chest as you feel tears starting to prick your eyes.

Why did he have to do that? Did he know how much you cried over the break up he initiated? He doesn’t know how hard it was for you to fall asleep, to even swallow anything, feeling ruined like you were dying after he broke your heart.

He had the chance to drink the soju, to walk away or just pick Hari; but he chose to make you feel this way instead and send you mixed signals.

So you did what you knew best, you drowned your agony in rounds of alcohol at the party, feeling the liquid burning your throat. But it helps you to relax, to have fun and most importantly, it helps you forget the pain.

Don’t worry, it’s not as toxic as you think it was. Ryujin and Winter was literally the best; bringing you some alcohol as the three spent time drinking, talking and laughing at the empty room you were in while ignoring the party throughout the night.

They had the decency of holding you back and keeping you in check; they knew you were going to regret it the next morning.

So when you all decided to head back to the dorm at two in the morning, you were only slightly tipsy from all the drinking, your face warming up to some degree.

“Wait, I need to go to the bathroom.” you announce as Winter and Ryujin climb into the car. They told you to hurry up as you rush back into the mansion, heading towards the closest restroom on the ground floor. 

The bathroom was so nice and clean that you didn’t mind sleeping on the floor if you could. Your eyes were so tired with eyes half-lidded that the only thing you could think of after returning to the dorm was to sleep. 

You close the door of the restroom, heading back to the car as fast as possible when you hear a faint sound of groaning at the end of the hallway. 

The place was quite dark; save for the party lights illuminating the hallway. There was no one other than you in the vicinity with most of the students already returning back.

You heard whispers of voices; a mix between two male and a girl before it was followed by a whimper of agony. At the corner of your eyes you spotted a trail of red spots leading towards where the voices were. 

This was straight up like a horror movie. It felt like a scene in The Shining, except you were Danny without the bike and the hallway was too dark for you to see the end.

You swallow down the lump in your throat, feeling fear creeping up your body, sending a cold shiver down your spine. You feel goosebumps forming on your skin as the voices get louder and louder as you slowly walk towards it.

The closer you got, the more you were convinced that the red spots were indeed trails of blood. You caught a faint waft of a metallic smell, like a copper coin in the air. Your heart palpitated louder; you could hear and feel your heartbeat at your throat.

The scene at the end of the hallway was not what you had expected.

You close your mouth with your hand in shock, eyes wide with what you witness. 

You watch Heeseung death grip a male by his neck, blood dripping down the latter’s mouth and head. Beside Heeseung was the girl you saw in the living room with him, her back against the wall with frightened eyes, hiding behind Heeseung’s protective figure.

Your gasp must have reached their ears because their attention was immediately on you. 

Thanks to your distraction, the male found the perfect opportunity to escape from Heeseung’s hold. But it was enough time for you to realize that the man you saw had golden eyes which glowed in the dark and a pair of wolf ears on his head. 

The man ran into a room, the sound of glass shattering echoed and you assumed he had escaped by jumping out of the window.

Heeseung let out a string of curses, a perplexed look plastered on his face as he glanced back and forth from the man’s direction to your figure. 

You watch in horror, taking a step back in fear as it registered on you that Heeseung’s eyes were as red as the blood on the floor. His hands and shirt were bloody and you assumed it belonged to the injured male who had run away. 

But it was nothing compared to his fangs protruding out from his upper lips, blood dripping down the corner of his mouth due to an injury. 

A vampire. 

A flashback to when Ryujin and Winter talked about a rumour about the supernatural creature crossed your mind. Not for a second did you believe those stupid rumour but now, you were staring back at one. You guess the joke was on you now.

You took large steps back as his eyes now zeroed onto you. You trembled at the sight and for a second, you thought this was your end right here. 

But you found the strength to immediately run and not for a second did you look back.

“Welp,” Jay started with a hand on his hip, observing the broken glass window where the werewolf had escaped. “Maybe some duct tape can do the trick for now.” 

The others came the minute they heard the big commotion. There were shards of glass everywhere on the floor, the curtains fluttering as a cold breeze entered the room.

Heeseung had filled in everything that happened.

The werewolf who had come uninvited to the party last minute, had the audacity to torment Jaehee, whom he had cornered just because she was affiliated with a group of vampires.

Being a ghost was always discriminated against among the supernatural species that roam earth.

When the soul of a deceased human is unable to pass peacefully, a ghost is a manifestation of that; they continue to roam around in an amiable human-like façade.

But unlike how the media have portrayed them, ghosts generally wander in solitary and don’t possess abilities or characteristics that make them a threat to anyone.

They prefer to stay away from other people’s business and instead, are in search of their own purpose in order to pass into the afterlife. In a way, they were the underdogs; the odd ones.

So when Heeseung stumbles upon Jaehee, the ghost of a woman his age wandering in the old building beside the campus, he took the opportunity to help the lost soul who had no idea she was dead in the first place.

"What did you say his name was again?" Sunghoon asks, pushing a few pieces of glass shard away from the floor. Jungwon had given Heeseung some wet cloth to wipe away the blood on his hand while Sunoo was attending to the small wound on his mouth.

"I think it was Jisung or something?" Heeseung tried to recall. "He mentioned his alpha being Bang Chan," Heeseung turned to Jay who was in deep thought. "Does that ring a bell? He said that you, K and whoever this Bang Chan person is, go way back."

Jay closes his eyes for a moment, reminiscing old memories that happened centuries ago. A few seconds of silence went by before he replied. "I mentioned to you guys before that there existed a great war between vampires and werewolves?"

The others attentively listen, nodding their heads for Jay to continue.

"K's pack, in a way, was our double agent; working together with the vampires, with me, in order to take down the werewolves."

Ni-ki raises his eyebrows in confusion. "Why would K's pack help the vampires?"

"Because the werewolves intended to eliminate Humans," Jay declared. All of them watch as Jay walks towards a table with a stack of books, pulling one in the middle, watching the tower fall apart as a few books go tumbling down on the floor.

"I think anyone with a brain can tell that by doing so can fuck up the whole balance of the system. You take out a species in a food chain, the whole pyramid topples over."

There was tension in the air at the way Jay was glaring at the fallen books. There was something else flickering across his face, maybe pain? sadness?, but it disappeared the moment he turned to face the others again.

"After the war, some packs survived and surrendered, and one of them belongs to Bang Chan's. But I don't think this little taunting had anything to do with him."

"Henchmen acting on their own?" Jake guessed right away. Jay nodded in affirmation at him. 

"This is something me and K might have to do, just stay low in the meantime. Another thing―" Jay then turned towards Heeseung.

"Are you sure there was no Human witness?"

The image of your frightened face and frozen figure cross his mind.

"Yes, I'm sure of it."

You now believe that vampires are real.

When you rushed out of the mansion and climbed into the back seat of Winter’s car, your face was as white as sheets and you were dazed until Ryujin had to shake your shoulder to get your attention.

You couldn’t bare yourself to sleep. The images of Heeseung’s piercing red eyes gazing back at you kept replying in your mind as you toss and turn in your bed.

But for some reason, his gaze to you didn’t felt threatening; the fear in you was fuel from the atmosphere before that, the amount of murderous intent in the way Heeseung choke the other male with bloody hands and the tension leading up to the discovery.

You didn’t get a wink of sleep.

You had to drag yourself to get ready for morning class and your head throb a little. Winter was kind enough to give you a hangover cure and you find the pain had lessened as the class ended.

You tried your best to avoid Heeseung. He was already in a different Major than you so it was relatively easy, except when you see either of his close friends did you swerve around since it’s likely that he’ll be with them.

And also the fact that you can’t trust either of them now. They could also be vampires for all you know.

In a sleep deprived state, you nonchalantly walk at the main hallway of the west building of the campus, looking forward to eating some good dinner before heading off to dreamland for a much needed sleep.

You were yawning and wiping the tears accumulated on the corner of your eyes, minding your own business before a hand reached out to grab you by the arm, dragging you to the doors of an empty lab.

You were about to scream until the person clamped your mouth shut with the palm’s of their hand, already anticipating that you’ll shout for help.

You tried to trash around and wiggle out of the person’s grip but the minute you faced Heeseung, you immediately stopped dead in your tracks.

“If you don’t scream, I’ll let you go.” He said.

With brows furrowed and a defiant look, you lick his hand in hopes that he’ll let go, but when he stares at you with an eyebrow raised and an amused smirk, unaffected by your little trick, you glance down in embarrassment before nodding your head.

The second he lets you go, you pull yourself away from him, making sure the distance between you and him is as far as possible for you to feel safe.

Heeseung slowly retreats his hand back, feeling a little hurt by the way you immediately separate yourself from him. But at the same time, he understands why you were on guard and glaring at him cautiously.

Especially with everything you had witnessed, he doesn’t blame you.

“Listen, I just wanna explain to you about what happened.” Heeseung raises his hands up to show his palm, he needs to show you he means no harm.

“I don’t think there’s anything to explain.” You curtly reply.

He gave you a pleading look. “Please, please just listen to me. I promise you it’ll all make sense.”

With lips pressed in a deep thought, you let out a sigh of frustration, giving in to his desperate attempt to explain himself.

“Fine. But you stay where you are.” You pointed your index finger at him angrily.

Heeseung went into a period of word vomit, spilling to you everything that needs context and explanation. The more in depth he went into, the more horrified you were and it took you a moment to fully digest the information.

“Don’t tell anyone. Including Jay and the others about you knowing.” He quickly added at the end.

You gave him an almost snort of sarcasm. “Of course idiot, I don’t want to look like a freak in front of the whole student body.”

You watched as a genuine grin spread around his face, obviously entertained by your comment and the little insult you called him, but at the same time, you saw a wave of relief in his body at the way he instantly relaxed.

You realize that this was the first time the both of you spoke to each other after the break up. It was much more natural? than you expected, minus the supernatural part of the conversation.

Or maybe it's the fact that deep inside, you still wanted to talk to him, even after all the sufferings you went through.

“But I have a favor to ask, if you don’t mind. You can say it’s a bargain for keeping my mouth shut.”

Heeseung perks up when you mention the word ‘favor’, with an anticipating look as he waits for you to continue.

Jake regretted agreeing to tutor you for calculus.

No, it wasn’t because you were a frustrating student. In contrast, he was happy to help you pass the upcoming exam. Not to mention the look of shock on his face when it was Heeseung that told him that you wanted a tutor asap.

Jake regretted on agreeing because he didn’t expect to be a fucking third wheel.

The schedule was simple. After your class, the both of you would meet up at the library for the tutoring session. He didn’t mind that Heeseung wanted to tag along, as long as you were comfortable with it.

He had fun teasing the older male about his lingering affection for you, something Heeseung still denies constantly, which in turn, results in an eye roll from Jake.

It was the lingering glance towards each other from across the table, the way y/n will get distracted every time Heeseung does the bare minimum, the way Heeseung would bring coffee for you but accidently forgot to get one for him, it was those little things that make him scream internally, wishing for this to be over.

The fact that neither of them even tried to be subtle got him gagging at the amount of sexual tension in the air.

The both of you might as well make out on the table and Jake will still ask you if you’re done with the practice question. It wouldn’t make a damn difference.

Jake Sim wasn’t the only one who noticed.

“Are you fucking Lee Heeseung?”

You choke on the orange juice you were peacefully drinking before Ryujin opens her mouth. You wipe the excess fluid dripping down your mouth and pat your chest as you continue to cough.

“Shin Ryujin, what the hell?!” you scowl, feeling disgust at the sticky residue of the juice around your chin. Ryujin rolled her eyes at how dramatic you were while Winter was beside her, ready to interrogate you further.

Just when you wanted a peaceful lunch.

“Answer the question y/n. Are you and Heeseung rolling in the hay?” Winter asks. In confusion, you reply in disarray.

“What?”

Ryujin gave you a deadpanned look. “Did he put his dick into your hole?”

Winter gave her a questioning look, obviously appalled by her poor choice of word, in which Ryujin shrugged at. “Did you have to be so vulgar?”

“Someone has to be the bad cop.”

You glance back and forth between the two, shaking your hand to catch their attention, with eyebrows in a furrow.

“What makes you two think that me and Heeseung are fucking?” you ask in confusion. The both of them turn to give you a stunned face.

“Winter, have you or have you not notice that Heeseung and y/n were literally eye-fucking each other without knowing whenever they are in the same vicinity.” Ryujin said in a posh manner, repositioning her posture as if she was having a normal conversation with Winter.

“Why yes Ryujin. And the way they scan each other’s body from head to toe whenever they greet each other? Might as well just take each other’s clothes off while you're at it!”

You cross your hand over your chest, giving the both of them an annoyed look as they continue their act of taunting you. “Are you both done yet?”

“Look,” Ryujin said, switching to a more serious side “There is definitely something hanging between you guys. Both of you dumbasses don’t realize it but all of us do, including Heeseung’s friends.”

“Have the both of you ever talked about why he broke up with you in the first place?”

You pause a little at Winter’s question, pressing your lips in silence, not knowing what to answer.

It’s true that ever since the situation at the party, it seems that you and Heeseung have been interacting more lately.

For over three months of complete avoidance after the break up, you had cut him out of your life, sometimes not even acknowledging his existence.

But now, it was just simple hellos and glancing at each other across the room.

Sure, sometimes you would catch yourself staring at him for too long. Maybe if he didn’t wear that damn lip ring or a pair of tight pants while sitting with his legs open you wouldn’t ogle on him too much.

Okay, maybe you were still into him a little too much but exes can still talk to each other right? It’s not like he feels the same way anymore, or not, he wouldn’t break up with you in the first place.

Whatever the tension they were referring to, you refuse to acknowledge it. You reassure yourself that it might be because you now know his secret, and that it's just him looking out to see if you’ll break the promise.

Yeah, that’s it, you thought. There’s no way it was anything more than that.

The first time you met Jaehee, you didn’t expect a ghost to look more alive than a normal human being. 

Jaehee often whined and complained to him how she wanted to explore outside and have fun with girls her age.

The only person he thought was you; the person who perfectly fits the candidate criteria which is a girl (obviously) and knows the existence of the supernatural.

To be frank, you were the only human girl he knows that is aware of the supernatural, making you his only choice.

When Heeseung said that he needed help from you, which is to accompany him and the said ghost on a walk around the mall, you expected her to look like Casper the ghost or the undead looking ones from the conjuring. 

With short hair cut and youthful features, she was so lively and sweet that you wonder how the girl is even remotely the same age as you.

Heeseung did tell you that he speculates that she was probably a couple hundred years older than them, and had died closer to their age. Thus, she doesn’t know anything about the current world right now.

He mentioned that Jaehee was not aware that she was even dead the first time he met her. So, he decided to take her in for a while until she could pass into the afterlife; making him her babysitter.

It was then that you understood the relationship between the two; Heeseung being more like a guardian to the girl to keep her safe in the meantime.

You can’t believe that the hint Ni-ki gave you was actually real and you felt bad for misunderstanding the situation back at the party. 

But now you get why he warned you that Jaehee can be too mischievous and eager to learn about the human lifestyle.

You were probably dragged every five seconds by the hand, the girl kept questioning everything around her with such an innocent wonder that you can’t help but smile in endearment. It made you think of how cruel it was for her to stay in the real world rather than passing in peace. 

It was also fun watching her reaction to riding an escalator for the first time; seeing her turn rigid and holding onto your jacket with her eyes closed, curling to your side in a cowardly manner.

Heeseung throughout the whole time trailed behind the two, hands in his pocket with a small smile on his face as you gently patted the frightened girl on the shoulder, reassuring her that the escalator was safe. 

He did the right thing to invite you. 

After what seems like hours of window shopping, you teach her a thing or two about fashion and now, she seems more obsessed with the idea of dressing up and modelling than actually buying the clothes.

This leads her to beg you to join as well, which you gave in and let out a sigh of defeat the moment she gave you a pair of puppy dog eyes. 

You stood in front of the mirror of the changing room. The lights were blinding your eyes off and the heat radiating from it was not helping as well. The mirror was tall and large, showing your reflection from top to bottom. 

It was a simple white floral dress that reached your knees, halter straps with a bare shoulder look giving it a breathable and easy design built for comfort.

It was definitely a type of dress you would often wear in the summer but now that it’s closing to autumn, the weather was a bit more chilling. 

You choose this just for the heck of it; already missing the sunny weather. 

“Tadaa! Heeseung, tell me how I look?” you hear Jaehee’s voice from outside the changing booth. She must have finished trying on her outfit. 

“Pretty decent for a ghost.” 

You let out a small chuckle when you heard Jaehee pouts and whines at Heeseung’s monotone response. You knew from the tone of his voice that the male was only joking.

He did that pretty often with you whenever you wore something new to show off to him. He would pat your head, telling you he was just joking before proceeding to whisper in your ear, how beautiful you look. 

Well, last time when you were still in a relationship.

“y/n! Come out! I wanna see your outfit.” Jaehee said in a sing-song manner. You adjust and pat down the material of the dress one more time before opening the door.

“Tadaa.” You emerge from the changing, gesturing to your outfit with fake enthusiasm to try and match the ghost’s excitement.

Jaehee claps and squeals in delight before linking elbows with you. She dragged you both together to stand in front of Heeseung, who was sitting on a chair, preoccupied with his phone.

When he looks up, you suddenly take note of the way his eyes widen and his posture straighten, his hands slowly putting down the device.

His eyes rake down from your body to your head attentively as if drinking in your appearance, lips slightly parted and Adam's apple bobbing as if you had him under a spell.

It was at this moment, you finally understood what the others meant by the weird tension.

You suddenly realize that maybe the dress was showing too much leg; your shoulder being exposed excessively as well.

When you start to feel warmth at the tips of your ears, hands fidgeting and legs moving to shift your weight, did Heeseung whip his head to look away, a hand covering his mouth. He tried hard not to glance your way.

“I have another dress I wanna wear! I’ll be right back!” Jaehee, who was obvious about the sudden change in mood, skips back to the changing room, leaving the two of you alone.

There was an awkward silence present in the room and it didn’t help that Heeseung was still looking away from you.

“I’m….gonna go change.” You nervously said, tip toeing in a fiddly manner towards your own changing room to save yourself from the embarrassment.

When you were gone from his sight, Heeseung let out a deep sigh of relief, back slouching on the chair.

He massaged his face, the image of you in that dress looking so sexy and alluring kept replaying his mind. The way the outfit showed off your shoulder and the way it hugged your curves; Heeseung groan in agony just thinking about your fucking legs.

He tried to suppress the arousing feeling in him. He can’t stop reminiscing the times where he could hold your body against his, leaving butterfly kisses on your collarbone, his hands caressing the skin of your thighs as he goes higher and higher until he hears your voice hitch—

He let out a muffled groan. He can’t believe he was acting like a pubescent teenager fantasizing about illicit things by just seeing fucking skin on a girl.

You obviously were uncomfortable with his gaze, the look of confusion on your face before he looked away. He can’t keep leading you on like this, like he was in love with you, which he madly is and will always be, but he was the one who broke your heart.

You didn’t deserve to be played like this.

But he misses you. He miss you so fucking damn much.

He hasn't even told the other’s yet about you knowing that they were vampires. He can already predict the disappointment in Jay’s face if he knew.

No human was supposed to know the supernatural exists; whether it be vampires, werewolves, ghosts or even demons, whom Jay has mentioned still roam among human civilization in hiding.

He had tons of episodes where he accidentally came across humans in his vampire characteristics, the look of fear in their eyes made him accept the fact that he is no longer a human.

But what really scares him the most was the fact that you’ll also feel the same, that you’ll also see him as anything but a blood sucking monster.

How did you end up here in the first place?

You let out a soft groan, pushing your head up from the most aching position you’ve ever slept on. A pulsing headache overwhelms your sensation.

Your throat is dry and you squeeze your eyes a couple of times as your view becomes increasingly clear.

It took a while for you to realize that you were in a dark warehouse. The window outside indicates that it was way deep in the night, only the moonlight shone through the glass pane.

A few strands of hair had stuck on your face. You were about to push it away until you realized you couldn’t move your arms. It was at this moment you took in the fact that you were tied to a chair, tight ropes circle around your body and holding you down captive with your hands behind your back.

“What the hell?” you question, confused at the situation. It wasn’t until you noticed three figures observing you from a far at the other side of the room, gold eyes shining through the dark, spacious warehouse.

“Jisung, she’s up!”

“Shut up, Hyunjin. I know she’s up!”

“Guys, I don’t think this is a good idea. What if Chan-“

“-Chan Hyung won’t know anything if we don’t fuck this up Felix.”

The loud conversation caught your attention as the figures slowly emerged out of the shadows. The one in the middle immediately sparks familiarity in your head.

It was the male you saw at the party, the person who Heeseung had beat up for threatening Jaehee, the one who is a werewolf.

The other two follow suit, standing side by side with each other, looking slightly perplexed compared to Jisung.

From the outside, they look like normal, everyday, mundane students but you know you shouldn’t be fooled by what you can only see with the naked eye. 

“Where am I?” you asked. 

Jisung gave you a smirk. “Before I answer you human,” he said the last word with such distaste that he almost spit. “I have a few questions of my own.”

Walking closer until he was an arm’s length from where you were captured, he tilted his head slightly towards the other two. Hyunjin and Felix understood the gesture, silently walking away until it was only the two of you in the dark, spacious room. 

You put up a guard, uncomfortable at the way he was staring at you unpleasantly. You swallow the fear creeping up your throat, feeling anxious at the fact that you had just been kidnaped, captured and brought into an unknown place.  

The last thing you could remember was walking home after studying in the library before your mouth was clamped shut with a piece of cloth, presumably containing the drug that knocks you out cold. But what would you offer to a bunch of werewolves? unless-

“You need me because of Heeseung.” you clarified. 

It makes sense right? He saw you at the party. He probably saw you, Heeseung and Jaehee together in public as well. What else would he take you as a hostage for? To take revenge on Heeseung for beating him up?

Jisung gave you a rather taunting chuckle. “Close enough, but that’s not really what I’m after.” 

“Then what are you really after?”

“Information,” Jisung said, hiding his hands in his pocket nonchalantly as if he didn’t commit a crime. “Tell me where The Sanctuary is and the location of the Dust and I’ll set you free.”  

The Sanctuary? Dust? You stared at him in confusion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about?” 

The way his mood shifts tells you that he didn’t expect that answer from you. You watch the corner of his lips turn downwards and his eyes fuming with anger, lips press into a thin line making you anxious at what he was about to do to you. 

“You don’t know don’t you?” 

You flinch when he reaches out to grab your jaw, pulling you forcefully to look at his rather haunting golden eyes.

You stiffen immediately at the contact. You know the minute he had the chance, if he just twisted your jaw with enough force and the right angle, you would be gone in a second.  

So you sit still, waiting for his next step with hands forming into balls of fist to hide the fear, nails digging at the palm of your hand. The rope around you felt even more suffocating now, cold sweat trailing down your back. 

“I hear that you and him have been together for a while. It seems that he didn’t tell you anything?” 

“We broke up months ago. It seems like you didn’t get the latest news? And here I though you’ll have a keener sense that Heeseung”

You didn’t know what came over you. It was not the right time for you to get sassy, knowing that he had the advantage to kill you now. But it kinda ticks you off that he mentioned your past relationship with Heeseung. 

“You humans really do know how to bark don’t you?” He sneered. You could feel his hold on you tightens and you winced when his sharp nails dig into the skin of your jaw and cheeks.

“Even if you don’t know anything, you can make a really good bait,” He examined you further. “You really do look hideous up close.”

You snorted, “Don’t worry, you’re not exactly the level of Jacob Black as well.”

“What the fuck is that?”

“I don’t know if I should feel sorry or jealous about you not knowing twilight,” you said.

You should really stop rambling before he actually kills you.

He gave you a distasteful look. “I don’t indulge in foolish human culture.”

You were about to retort before you saw him immediately perk up.

He looked agitated but there was a sense of expectation in the way he turned towards a figure approaching the two of you. His lips curl into a provocative smirk as he turns to stand behind you, the strong grip still attached to your face.

“Well, well,” He let out a very amused chuckle “it seems like your saviour is here.”

Your eyes widen as Heeseung emerges from the shadow. He looked dishevelled and you could see that he was breathing rapidly. But he could only look at you the moment he stepped out into the lights.

“One move and she’s gone.”

A shiver went down your spine when you heard the werewolf from behind you. You could see Heeseung still held his gaze at you, eyes soft and filled with reassurance, as if to tell you that everything will be alright.

You let out a gasp when Jisung twists your head in an angle, moving it enough for you to react.

Heeseung immediately moves his attention to the male behind and his gaze hardens at the way the werewolf was smirking in triumph in getting the vampire’s attention.

“Your watchers weren’t really that challenging,” Heeseung said “They were more cooperative than I thought.”

Jisung was displeased and honestly taken aback by the words. How could a mere Alter Vampire, a human turned into a vampire, be able to get through two werewolves that survived the war centuries ago?

They were far more superior than him. Even a pureblood born vampire struggles in a fight with them. How could he—

“Han Jisung.”

You couldn’t comprehend how a simple voice could make all the strands of hair at the back of your nape stand up.

The voice was commanding and you could tell that this person knew the power behind his orders, because the place was overwhelmingly suffocating the minute he showed himself not far beside Heeseung.

Jisung’s hold on you quiver, as if he was affected by the voice in such a severe manner as his breathing intensified and you could tell he was on edge.

“Let go of her, Jisung.”

The male behind you shook his head. “No! I won’t! We were this close to getting the apprehend Chan-hyung. If we can get access to the The Sanctuary, the witch’s hut then—”

“Then what Jisung? The war has been over for centuries. We lost and it’s time that we move on” Bang Chan let out a sigh of disappointment, trying to reason with the younger male but Jisung was still persistent on going with his plan.

“I’ve already told Felix and Hyunjin to keep an eye on you, and you went behind my back? behind the Alpha’s permission?”

Jisung’s face contorted in betrayal. He finally understands how Heeseung managed to go through them with ease, they were with the Alpha in the first place. He bit his lips in frustration.

“Jisung, let go of her.”

Bang chan’s voice was like a spell, hypnotic almost, as he slowly prowled towards them. Jisung’s hold on you was quivering harder, as if he was trying to resist the order given to his Alpha, the leader of the pack.

But to no avail, Bang Chan was far more superior, far more ancient, and because of that, his pheromones were absolute.

Jisung knew that. That was why he stood frozen in his place before he slowly let go of your jaw and fell on his knees with his head hanging, no longer able to resist the order.

You feel how powerful the pheromones were. Your vision starts to blur and your lungs feel like it is squeezing against your chest with such force that you start to break out into cold sweats.

You were at the verge of passing out, eyes heavy and threatening to shut close. You don't know how long you can take with this suffocating feeling as you let a deep breath of agony. 

It wasn’t until you felt the ropes around you begin to untangle and you felt a pair of cold hands holding on to your face, softly calling out to your name.

It was Heeseung, and he urged you to wrap your arms around his neck as he carried you bridal style, lifting you up from the chair into his arms.

Everything felt like a fever dream like you were going in and out of consciousness. You hear Heeseung and Bang Chang exchange a few words but it was muffled due to your condition so you weren’t able to make up their conversation.

The last thing you remember was Heeseung whispering to you that he got you and that you were safe from harm's way before you passed out.

You almost thought whatever happened to you was a dream, because the next day, you woke up from your bed feeling more normal than ever.

It wasn’t until you noticed a note on your bedside did you realize it was all real, and also the fact that you still felt a little iffy; no thanks to the drug and pheromones physiologically affecting your body to the core.

I’m sorry.

It was a simple note, but it conveyed to you thousands of emotions that Heeseung couldn’t put in words.

Of course he would apologize, you thought, gripping on the piece of paper as you try to suppress the dejected feeling in you.

It was the same words that utter out of his mouth when he broke up with you. No explanation, no elaboration on why he wanted to break up, just a simple apology afterward.

You knew he wanted to say something more but saying those words was easier, because he genuinely felt sorry, but you don’t even know why he was apologizing for? Sorry for falling out of love? Sorry for dragging this relationship out? Sorry for breaking your heart?

And now, was he apologizing for getting you involved with the supernatural? or was it for letting you go through a whole process of getting kidnapped and endangering your life?

You didn’t like it at all, as you wiped the tears at the corner of your eyes, threatening to escape as you recall the memory in your mind.

It felt like he was pushing you away again, keeping you hidden, keeping you safe but hurting you at the same time.

The werewolf mentions that Heeseung didn’t tell you everything about him, and you imagine how much more was Heeseung keeping a secret from you.

Heck, he hasn’t even told the others about you knowing and you wonder if it had anything to do with the information that Jisung mentioned.

It made you realize that if the both of you don’t talk about it, it would only make the wound even more unbearable.

You were honestly so happy when the two of you were getting closer, even if the both of you considered each other as acquaintances; it was better than being complete strangers.

It’s as if the gap between you two were within an arm’s reach ever since you knew that he was a vampire.

But now, he was so far away from you. Like a star in the night; he was so close yet so far from your reach.

It was what you thought when you went to the balcony of the 3rd floor of Jay’s mansion, opening the sliding door to see Heeseung leaning on the railing, his head looking up towards the dark sky.

At that moment, you really thought he was among the stars that night.

You close the sliding door, muffling the sound and music coming from the party down in the living room. When you arrived, your first mission was to find Heeseung among the crowds.

But when you bump into Jay on the way, he gives you a knowing smirk, an eyebrow raised as he gestures to the stairs, mouthing to you where Heeseung was, as if he knew you were searching for the male.

He knows.

“Is Jake your messenger dog now?” you said, tucking your hands into the pockets of your jacket as you feel the autumn chill against your exposed skin, causing you to shiver.

You wonder how he could resist the cold breeze with just a black t-shirt, a white cap and trousers until you realize, of course he can, he was a vampire after all. They were the embodiment of coldness.

Heeseung turned around to face you with a small smile, pearly white teeth threatened to show itself as you stroll to stop beside him, hands rested on the railings as well.

“I get it that the message was delivered well?” He asked.

You nodded. “I even gave him a treat for helping me pass the test.” You let out a giggle, fingers fiddling against the steel railings when the conversation died down. Heeseung had folded his arms and rested against it.

“So,” you started, shifting your weight between the balls of your feet out of nervousness “Why did you ask Jake to tell me to come meet you at the party?”

Heeseung stared out of the distance, licking his bottom lip out of habit when he was anxious. You could tell he was trying to recollect himself, finding the right words to articulate himself to you.

You waited there, basking in the cold breeze of the night.

“The day I found out I turned into a vampire was a few months ago,” He said. “I wasn’t sure what to make of it. I was confused, so unsure of myself on what to do.”

“Jay really helped me out during those times but then, I started to think about what being a vampire really meant.” He turns slightly to meet your gaze.

“You don’t know what the supernatural world has to offer, y/n. It was a lot to take in. Enemies, danger and dark magic lurk everywhere, wherever path I take, and don’t get me started on the immortal and blood sucking thing.”

“It took a great toll on me, like something was sucking my humanity bit by bit, tearing me apart like a sheet of paper and it was at that point that I knew this was my fate and that there was no escape to it. I- I don’t think I can even trust myself as well.”

You reach out to gently place a hand on top of his and you could physically see him immediately calm down. The both of you stare at the way he moves to lace his fingers with yours, something about the action made the both of you realize how complete it looked.

“And then I thought about the future, what it meant to my family and the friends around me and—“

His words died down when he turned to look at you, an unbearable expression on his face and you knew what meant before he even finished his sentence.

His thumb rub circles around the back of your hand, feeling how warm you are compared to him.

“When I heard that he was taking you hostage, I think I almost went into rampage mode,” He laughed out with such nervousness that you knew he only did it because you knew he would.

“If it weren’t for their Alpha being there, maybe you’ll see what I am capable of.” He stopped to look at your reaction.

You only press your lips in silence, remembering the time where he held the werewolf by his neck at the party. They are powerful creatures, no doubt but Heeseung— he was different. There was no way he would intentionally hurt someone without a reason.

“That’s why, I need to show you this,” with his other hand, you watch him pull a sachet bag from his pocket, “This is dust. It’s an item desired by many, made by a witch and Jay is the only one who possesses it. It only works for humans to make them forget about the supernatural. Using this, you can—“

“Wait, wait—“ you stop him from continuing, taken aback by his sudden proposition, “—you’re telling me to forget about everything? Are you insane Heeseung?”

“You don’t understand, don’t you? When you stumble across me at that party, I thought that was the end, that you’ll finally be afraid of me, heck even think I’m a monster.”

You search his eyes in disbelief. “Why would I even think of that? You know that’s not true.”

Sure you were afraid the first time, but what kind of person wasn’t? But being with him after makes you realize that it didn’t change who he was, he was still Heeseung and he was very much not a monster.

He let out a low sigh. “I knew that. That’s why I took the chance, that’s why I didn’t tell the others about you knowing. I wanted to let you know that I was still the person I was before. But I can’t let what happened slip by again.”

He shook his head, his eyes pleading for you to understand. “Please, I’m begging you, I don’t think I can let anything happen to you. Keeping you safe is all I fucking wanted.”

His voice crack at the end, biting on his lower lips to keep him from breaking down in front of you. You understand now why he broke up with you.

You try to blink away the tears threatening to spill but to no avail; Heeseung watches as it flows down your cheeks as you punch at his chest in fury.

“You idiot.” you lent another punch to his chest but Heeseung could barely feel the force as he continued to stare at your upset face.

“And here I thought you broke up with me because you fell out of love, or maybe you finally realised that I wasn’t the one anymore. How selfish can you be to break up with me, only to say that was in favor of my safety!”

You didn’t know how many times you punched him right in the chest until he moved to hold your wrist. At this point, you couldn’t stop the tears flowing down your cheeks as your sobs echoed in the air.

Heeseung was silent the whole time.

“No matter how hurt my heart is, I’ll always be here for you,” You whimper, “Please don’t let me go Heeseung.”

Heeseung could feel his heart broken into millions of pieces. He was distorted, everything inside him shake, bend and break when you looked at him with those eyes and the walls and fences he built came crumbling down.

He took you in his arms, feeling your warmth against his body as he dived into the crook of your neck. He felt your hands clawing and clenching at the fabric of his shirt in desperation, pressing him closer to you.

He basks in your sweet scent, a mix of vanilla and something floral. To him, you smell like home where he truly belongs and at that moment, he knew you got him wrapped around your finger.

He’ll never let you go anymore.

Heeseung broke the hug to caress your face, wiping away any dried tears on your cheeks. You lean closer to rub the tip of your nose against his and Heeseung reciprocate back.

He traced his fingers over your features, steely eyes succumbing to how beautiful you look before it stopped to your lips. You notice his gaze through his eyelashes as his thumb rests on the cushion of your lower lips.

You can feel his breath tickling your cheek bones. He leans closer, palm holding the side of your face before he slowly closes his eyes and captures your lips with his.

Immediately a burst of butterflies invade your stomach, feeling his lips against yours was feeding the hunger that was starved in you when he was gone. You clench harder on the fabric of his shirt at the satisfying notion.

Heeseung felt the ache in his throat disappear the moment he got a taste of your sweet lips. No amount of blood could ever soothe the itch he felt losing you and may he dared confess, you tasted better than any blood he tasted.

He was addicted to you.

Heeseung broke the kiss in such a sudden manner that you let out a soft whimper. Your thirst was not quite quenched yet.

A little in him fucking love the way you look right now, lips swollen and eyes half lidded. He couldn’t wait to see how you look if he went even further.

“I didn’t hook up with Hari. I wanted to tell it to you during the game but you left before I could explain.” He whispered.

Slightly dazed, you swallow down your saliva before replying. “Why are you bringing this up now?”

He pushes you gently against the railing, pressing his body further into your body. His other hand trailed to rest on your waist before he rested his forehead against yours and suddenly, you were hyperaware at the amount of lust and desire pooling in his eyes at the way he was staring at your lips.

“I wanna show you how ruined I can be at just a taste of your lips. I want you to bring me on my knees,” He moved to lick your bottom lip, nibbling at the flesh, inducing a moan from your mouth at the motion.

“I want you to break me and make me fall apart.”

He captures your lips once more but this time, you can feel how desperate and needy it was. You felt the railing behind you digging on your back as Heeseung continued to ravish your mouth.

He let his tongue slip into your mouth and felt it explore every inch of you. You let out a string of muffled moans against his lips and it only tugged on his arousal even more.

You were out of breath, desperate to break the connection, but your carnal needs out weigh your own lungs. So you started to claw at the back of Heeseung’s neck, feeling his hair in between your fingers to draw the kiss even more deeper.

You never knew loving could hurt so good.

He seems to notice your squirming, hesitating to break the kiss but the minute he let’s go, he dives into the crook of your neck. A small sigh escapes as you breathe in a few gasps of air.

“Heeseung.” you weakly called out. You let out a whimper when he continued to kiss your neck to your collarbone, feeling his lips leave wet kisses on the skin.

Though you tilted your head to the side, you grabbed onto his shoulder to get his attention. “Not here.”

Your pleading cries caught his attention and before you knew it, Heeseung grabbed you by the wrist at such speed that you didn’t notice that he was leading you towards a familiar guest room, away from the crowding noise of the party downstairs. 

It was the guest room the both of you would often use, both for cuddling and also some illicit activities that was once the reason why Jay refused to let you guys use the room anymore.  

Heeseung didn’t hesitate to connect his lips once more to your neck the minute he locked the door. His teeth nibble and graze against the sensitive surface and you can’t help but moan when he moves to cup one of your breasts, kneading the soft flesh through your shirt. 

The both of you moved closer to the edge of the bed as Heeseung continued to pleasure you. Removing your jacket, you let your hands travel down to his chest until you felt the hard outline of his cock against the fabric of his trousers.

Heeseung let out a small groan against your neck as you rub the hardened cock, the friction was causing his toes to curl and his hips to buck against the palm of your hands.

“Let me suck you off.” you breathe out. 

Heeseung felt his breath hitch a bit, the mere thought of your lips wrapping around his head sends a fury of lust coursing through his body. He already felt some precum leaking out of his cock and the tent only grew bigger when you began to unbuckle his pants.  

“Fuck y/n,” He groaned, watching you began to kneel against hard floor, pulling his trousers until it pooled on his feet. “Are you trying to make me cum before we even start?” 

You let out a small laugh, “You were the one who told me you wanted my lips to break you and make you fall apart.” 

Heeseung let out a loud sigh as you pulled on his boxers, freeing his hard and aroused cock from the confinement. He let his fingers thread through your hair before It rested on a secure grip behind your head.

If you were going to suck him off, he wanted the best view to watch you untangle him. 

“Then I am at your mercy.” He whispered. 

You rest your hand on his thigh before shoving his length into your mouth. Heeseung let out a whined moan, feeling his cock get engulfed by your warm mouth and feeling your tongue dragging at the side of his length where all the veins were protruding out from the stimulation. 

You watch from above as Heeseung closes his eyes from pleasure, shuddering ever so often when you let your tongue slip past his slit and tasting the salty precum.

Heeseung began to groan louder when you hollowed your cheeks, focusing on going up and down his length. He was enjoying the view from above, watching his cock disappearing inside your mouth.

“Fucking shit y/n.” Heeseung’s grip on the back of your head went tighter and you felt him slowly move his hips forward. His action caused his sensitive head to rub against the back of your throat. He was so hard, so big and so solid in your mouth that it was stretching the corners beyond the limits. 

“your mouth feels so fucking good. That’s it baby, right there, yeah just like that.” He praised, eyes rolled to the back at the pleasure.

You tried to control the pace by gripping onto his thighs but Heeseung continued to deep throat you and fucking your mouth until he was a moaning mess. Tears were starting to sting your eyes and you fought hard on your gag reflex to avoid getting choked. 

With one last thrust, his thigh clenches and you watch as he throws his head back, releasing his hot seeds into your mouth. You continue to pump the remaining length but your mouth stays attached to his head, welcoming his cum into your mouth.

You close your eyes shut, swallowing every drop of his seeds until it drips from the corner of your mouth to your chin.

Heeseung’s breathing was labored and he pulled out of your mouth once his high had died down. You relish in the bitter taste of his cum before wiping any excess dripping down.

A small sigh escaped his lips, trying to recover from the intense orgasm. It was everything he dreamed of, it was everything he wanted.

You had always gave him the best head, but being away from you for three months, it was like torture every time he wanted to jerk off.

He always imagine his hand as your wet cunt or your mouth, but even after reaching his climax, it never felt as good as actually having you, which in turned causes him to feel sexually frustrated.

There was something endearing at the way he trailed his hand to your glistening lips, a thumb pressing on the lower part. As much as he wants you to abuse him with those pretty lips of yours, it wouldn’t be enough to satisfy his desire.

“I need you baby, tell me you want this too.” Heeseung tug at your chin, prompting you to stand up. You wrap your hands around his neck as he gently places his hands onto your hips.

“I want you Hee, I want you so bad.”

You mumbled before your lips connected with his. His arm trailed downwards at your back before clutching onto your ass, shoving his bare hard cock against your abdomen.

There was so much desperation in the way he dry hump you. You can’t help but raise a leg to feel the delectable friction even more, giving excess to him as he holds onto the back of your thigh to hook it to his hip.

The knot under your stomach grew deeper as he continued to rub against you. All you can think of is the wetness pooling in your panties as Heeseung continues to nibble at the bottom of your lips.

The mattress cushions your fall when Heeseung pushes you. From where you lay, you watch him quickly pulled his shirt off before he was aiding you in taking yours as well.

“Your so beautiful, so fucking gorgeous you know that?”

The minute you took your bra off Heeseung was quick to murmur those praises while leaving feathering kisses on your cleavage. Every touch of his lips sends waves of pleasure to your core but the minute he sucks a nipple while simultaneously pinching at the other gets you arching your back.

Heeseung worshipped your breast as you continued to mewl and moan at every flick of his tongue against your nipple; gripping on the sheets of the bed while the other was nicely tugging at his hair.

He released you from his mouth when he heard your breath hitch, now tugging at your skirt to remove it. “Do you touch yourself thinking of me?”

You blush at how blunt his words were. Slightly taken aback, you pressed your lips shut, but in fact, the times where you did feel aroused after the break up, you find yourself calling out his name as you pleasured yourself; your face flush with shame when you realize after.

Your silence was all the confirmation he needed.

“Did you touch yourself like this?” He began to rub your folds over your panties, two fingers gliding over before stopping to circle around the sensitive nub of your pussy.

“Heeseung!” you moan, feeling your core pulsate at the friction. Your nails dig into his forearms as you feel your thighs twitch at every teasing motion he did to your clit.

He moved closer to you, watching the way your mouth was agape, eyes squeezing shut when his fingers moved to directly touch your wet folds. Every moan and whimper was music to his ears and he felt something raging and burning in him at the way you call his name.

As much as he likes to finger you until you are a mess, he removes your panties before tossing them to the side, moving closer to align his length against your core.

“Tell me if it hurts, okay?” He tenderly caressed your cheeks, as you nodded.

You couldn’t hold back a loud moan when he slid into you. The stretch was foreign, a bit uncomfortable and it was at this moment you realize how big Heeseung was.

It took you a few seconds to adjust to his size, your walls clenching to every surface of his cock and then you felt it hit you like a truck; the most euphoric pleasure you felt as he filled you to the brim until his pelvis was on yours.

Broken moans erupt from you as Heeseung thrust into you, moving in and out once he heard you begging for him to move. You find yourself reciprocating his movement, bucking your hips to match his thrust.  

You grab a hold of the sheets. The pleasure was so overwhelming and you felt the bubble in you slowly growing bigger and bigger, waiting for that one push to finally pop. 

Heeseung was equally as star struck, groaning ever so often on your ears as his arms, holding him above you, flexed at the side of your face. At this point, the bed frame was swaying at every movement of his hips, but his only focus was how tight and fuckable you feel. 

“Fuck,” you cursed as Heeseung quickens his pace, “Right there Hee, I’m close.” 

When your walls clench tightly around his cock at a particular thrust, Heeseung wasted no time than to repeatedly hit that deep spot. He went absolute feral, his hips wouldn’t stop moving, his pace was fast but he made sure his head railed onto that little bud perfectly. 

“Cum for baby, show me how good I make you feel.” 

He groans lowly, hands now gripping your hips to intensify every thrust. Though he was relentless, you see the longing in his fogging and half lidded eyes. He trailed his hand to your cunt, pressing and playing with you clit to drive you over the edge even more. 

You don’t know how many times you’ve choked over calling out his name. You could only feel your orgasm nearing as he continues to mercilessly hit that perfect spot and circulating his finger over your sensitive knob. 

He wanted to see you unravel, and unravel you did when you cried out his name, your orgasm washing over you like waves. 

The only view you see was the ceiling as you arch your back, toes curling. The bubble that was building up in you burst into oblivion, and you want nothing more than to feel like this forever with Heeseung.

Your walls clenched so tightly onto him that it became the final verdict for him to cum as well, his hoot seeds filling you up. He grunted, biting on his lower lips at the sheer amount of pleasure that overwhelmed him until he swore he saw stars. 

Heeseung slowly pushes through a few final thrusts hoping to savour the orgasm the both of you shared until he no longer feels ropes of cum pouring out.

He pulled out of you, collapsing at the space beside you. The both of you were panting and covered with sweat, still recovering from the climax. Heeseung’s mind was dizzy and exhausted at cumming twice but he shuffled to lay on his side to face you.

His push a few strands of hair stuck to your face and smiled at the way you were still dazed, mouth agape and heartbeat in disarray.

“Hey,” He softly called out, swallowing down his saliva “I love you.”

In contrast how he was previously, Heeseung said those words with the utmost adoration, his doe eyes staring back at you. His hair was a mess but it only adds to the tenderness of the moment as you place your hand on his with a smile on your face.

“I love you too, idiot.”

You look so perfect beside him. He was so stupid to let you go, and of course you’ll want to stay with him. He’ll show the world how much you mean to him.

Taglist: open/send an ask to be added

@mildlystupid​​ @heejaies​

[annie-sae]

Wouldn’t mind

Pairing: Kazutora x fem!reader, past Baji x fem!reader

Hurt/comfort

Author note: This is my way of dealing with Baji’s death finally being animated, this is me comforting myself so I don’t keep crying.

Also, I posted this on AO3 as well:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33561445

Part of the reason you decided to get close to him was kind of the same reason why you decided to help out Chifuyu and the remaining founding Toman members in any way you could; even if that meant putting yourself in various fights. It was a way to honor his memory.

You met Baji Keisuke; your Kei; as nothing more than a child because you were neighbors and your mom happened to be friends with his mother which ended in them arranging lots of playdates for you both ever since you could remember.

Your mothers always said you were meant to be and they were right, so yeah, they were delighted once you two finally stopped denying yourselves and started to date.

You two got together after one time in which Baji got into a particularly bad fight and you found him on your way home; his hands all bruised but despite how much they must have been hurting he was smiling in that unique way of his that always told you that no matter the pain he won and enjoyed himself.

To be honest you didn’t like that he always got into fights nor how reckless he could be but you had to admit that there was always something about the way his eyes glinted that drew you in.

You dragged him inside your home, knowing that his mother would flip out if she saw him and taking advantage of the fact that your mother was to get home late, you pushed him to the couch, went to the kitchen for a bag of frozen vegetables, grabbed his hand after cleaning the blood off and held the bag to his knuckles hoping that it would bring down the swelling.

There was no way of knowing who made the first move but next thing you knew after that was that you two were kissing; the frozen bag laying on the floor long forgotten. After that you finally acknowledged your feelings and started dating. There was no grand gesture, it was just one of many moments that you shared daily yet it was perfect.

Baji liked to keep you away from Toman businesses so for the most part you didn’t actually know the rest of the members except for Chifuyu; whom you met on various occasions while going to visit your boyfriend; and Mikey that you met as a child since you were always following around Baji and in a way became your friend too; but that was it. He kept that apart from the side of his life that involved you because he was well aware of how messy it could get and he didn’t want to drag you into any trouble.

Yet his gang life caught up to him, crashing into your world and pushing you into a lonely abyss that still to this day left a hole in your chest.

You’d always remember that dreaded day when your mother came home later than usual without letting you know anything, eyes teary and red rimmed. The moment she looked at you, she pulled you into a strong hug and sobbed as she caressed your hair murmuring a string of words you couldn’t really make out.

She was the one to deliver the news of his passing, how she was late because she was at the Baji household and had to accompany his mother to claim her son’s body after the woman received a call from the police station telling her that the boy had been stabbed and bled to death.

The day would never come when you’d forget the pain that shot through your body as you learned that he was gone. It hurt unlike anything else you have ever experienced, as if someone was crushing your chest like it was made out of paper, air knocked out of your lungs and the only thing you could do was scream helplessly his name as you held for dear life onto your mother’s frame. You felt bile rise up your throat so fast that it was a miracle that you didn’t throw up.

His funeral wasn’t any easier. Not when you arrived and his mom pulled you to his casket saying just how handsome he looked, inviting you to see him in a way that you couldn’t refuse.

Around an hour after yourself, arrived Chifuyu who went to you after giving his condolences to his best friend’s mother that held him the way she used to hold her boy but now she’d never get the chance to do anymore.

If you were being completely honest, you couldn’t remember much more of that day, your mind was hazy, too many gaps in the memory of all that transpired.

Only two things were clear as day in your mind. First was the way that Kei had looked inside that coffin smiling peacefully and for a moment you almost fooled yourself into thinking that he was just sleeping, but he was pale, his canines weren’t showing and his eyes were slightly sunken but you had to agree with his mom because he looked handsome indeed. The second was that Chifuyu stayed by your side throughout the whole thing, in fact he was the one who told you what actually happened and you were thankful for it all.

He told you what Baji did and why he did it and you believed it the second the words left his mouth because you knew him well and if there was anything that defined your beloved boyfriend was his heart, how willing he was to give anything for those that he cared about; his unwavering loyalty; you just wished he hadn’t put himself on the line for that.

Twelve years have passed and a lot of things changed since his parting, for starters you became a member of Toman.

One night; around a month after everything happened; you went to the Musashi temple fully aware that it was the place that the boys used as their base and in front of everyone gathered there; bracing yourself; you walked towards Mikey, bowed deeply and begged for him to accept you as a member.

At first most of the guys there laughed at you while others frowned and called you names shooing you away but you stayed still, that was until a big hand grabbed you by the arm and that was when you pulled away from it and punched the guy square in the nose remembering the time Baji taught you how to pack a punch. The guy tried to send a blow towards you but was stopped by Chifuyu yet the whole commotion came to a halt with Mikey’s commanding voice.

“Y/N, you know this is a guys-only gang”

“I’m aware, Mikey, but” you clenched your fists “but Keisuke cared about this gang so I feel like I must join, to protect everything he fought for” you raised your head “he also taught me how to fight so you don’t have to worry about me being a burden on you and I know a few things about first aid, I can carry my own weight” you were thankful for your mother being a nurse and having taught you a bit.

He stared at you, his eyes giving away nothing.

“The first division can take her in” Chifuyu supplied.

Mikey raised a brow and looked at another blonde guy.

“Takemitchy, you are the first division’s captain, do you agree to take her?” the guy straightened up and after sharing one look with Chifuyu he nodded.

An uproar started as a lot of guys started to complain about how bad of an idea it was to admit a girl in the gang but Draken stopped them with one word.

Mikey looked at you once more, then he sighed and nodded.

“Then welcome, Y/N L/N, from now on you are a member of the Tokyo Manji Gang under the first division”.

Later that day you gave your thanks to Chifuyu and Takemichi, for getting behind you and promised to help them in any way possible but Chifuyu made you promise to be safe and only join them as a last resource because he couldn’t allow Baji’s girlfriend to get hurt since he promised him he’d take care of you.

You knew that your parents wouldn’t be happy with you being a part of a gang but you had to do it, it was a way to stay close to Kei and you needed that or else you would have gone crazy, you were also thankful because life had it that you were assigned to the division that used to be his.

Shit happened but you always took things head on and you had to admit that Chifuyu and Takemichi played a crucial part in you surviving all the crappy things that happened until the gang disbanded. While still a member you were extremely grateful for makeup since it helped you hide from your parents a good amount of nasty bruises that came from the fights.

The second thing that changed was that you moved out of your parents’ house from the moment you started college and although at first it was hard and you were living in a tiny apartment that resembled more to a matchbox yet it was the only thing you could afford at the moment with the part time job you had but you were decided to not return home, not because you weren’t comfortable with them but because they were already doing too much for you by paying for your studies so you didn’t want them to be spending any more money on you.

You managed and after a while you got a better job that meant a higher pay grade and you moved out of your tiny place to your current one that was bigger and just a couple of minutes away from the cemetery where the Baji family grave was.

Even when you had exams due the next day, even when you were way too busy, you still made it a habit to go visit him daily, it didn’t matter if you had to walk for long or that you were so tired you could have fallen asleep while standing, you still went to see him.

Your mother told you once that maybe you should let go, that he wouldn’t like to have you clinging to him this much and to appease her you went to a couple of dates once every three months but you never made it past the first date but funnily enough that landed you a few long lasting friendships with some of the guys you tried to date.

One time his mom talked to you and told you just how grateful she was with you for loving her son the way you did but that you didn’t owe him anything, that you could move on because she was sure that was what he would have wanted and maybe she was right; to hell you knew that she was; but it wasn’t a matter of you feeling like you owed devotion to him but more like no one ever compared to him, not a single person awoke in you the same feelings he did, not with the same intensity it was kind of like a beautiful curse because you grieved daily his absence but you wouldn’t want it other way, even if you went back and told yourself that by loving him you’d end up in pain, you’d still go through it all because the time spent with him was worth it and you told her that so she smiled and even talked with your mother making her stop begging you to date and leave you to your own devices.

Another thing that changed was you because you cut your hair really short; yet without needing it you still wore a hair tie on your wrist daily as if it was some sort of amulet because it reminded you of him.

Also, with the bigger place you adopted three beautiful cats that you loved dearly, first there was Blue; whose black hair shone blue under certain light hence his name; then there was Leo; an orange tabby cat you found one day and adopted instantly; and Jin; a maine coon that was your appointed guardian and didn’t like anyone around you nor him.

The three always slept with you; which made you thankful for getting a big bed when you first moved; and in a way they made your life less lonely because in their presence you felt as if Keisuke was right there with you which made sense because you two had made plans about living together once highschool was over and then adopt a ton of cats, all the cats your parents never allowed in the house when you were younger.

Of course things don’t always end up the way we plan them, you knew that better than most although to be completely honest you never expected Kazutora to come into the picture.

You new who he was, on one occasion Kei told you that him speaking on his behalf and taking the full blame for what happened with Mikey’s older brother was a big factor on him staying out of juvie so in a way you were thankful to him but you also knew; through Chifuyu’s retelling; what happened on that horrible halloween when you lost your whole world.

Even when you knew that everything had been planned out by Kisaki, for the longest time you were resentful towards Kazutora, even going as far as to curse his sole existence because hadn’t it been for him then your Keisuke would surely still be with you. It took you years for you to come to terms with everything and accept that Baji chose to leave all because he cared about that boy way too much.

You came to realize that by hating Kazutora, by wishing him the worst and spending so much energy in resenting him you were betraying Kei’s wishes.

His final will was to keep Toman’s funding members; Kazutora included; safe, he chose death, going down as a villain to his friends, all just to protect them, to save him so the least you could do was carry on his wishes and look after them, not only after Chifuyu and the others but you also felt the moral obligation towards Keisuke, to welcome Kazutora and help him back into his life.

Now, you went to help around Chifuyu and Kazutora’s shop, fully aware that it was their way of honoring his memory, by living out the dream he never had the chance for.

You could understand them because everyday you did the same, hell, you even went to study veterinary because that had been the plan all those years back; he was supposed to open his pet shop and you were supposed to be the one to tend to the animals, he always said that you had the best shot because you usually did rather good at school.

You met Kazutora the day after Chifuyu picked him up from prison. You already knew that he would be joining you two for lunch the following day because he told you in advance in case you weren’t ready to meet the man that had played a big part in your old boyfriend’s death.

Chifuyu by that point had become your best friend in the world, your constant support. What started as a way to cope with Baji’s loss, as both of you searching in the other for any vestiges of his existence with the passing of the years turned into something more, a fraternal bond forged through shared grief.

Chifuyu was like a brother to you and you knew that he saw you as a sister, you cared about him deeply.

If you were being completely honest, you were a bit torn when a month prior to the release, he announced to you that he’d be picking up the guy and was planning on welcoming him as a roommate and as an extra hand at the shop; that is if the other accepted. I mean, you’d have to be crazy to just accept it as it was, no questions asked because whether manipulated and messed up in the head, it didn’t change the fact that he was the one to stab him.

Of course you knew it hadn’t been easy for him to reach that, it was obvious that he had thought it through, you could see in his eyes just how much went into making that decision but that he was sure that that was Baji would have liked and you knew that as well because that was the type of person Keisuke used to be, a bit rough on the edges but so caring and willing to give for those he loved, and he sure as hell had proven how much he cared about the guy.

You had never talked to him, what little you knew about him was what Baji had mentioned all those years back when he almost went to prison and what Chifuyu told you, how he was getting the help he needed and seemed to be making progress but that was it.

To say it was awkward at first was a big understatement. He was extremely quiet and even after you greeted him he refused to make eye contact while you kept fidgeting in place trying to come up with something to say. Thank god for Chifuyu since he was the one to introduce you although he could have been a bit more careful when he introduced you as Baji’s old girlfriend, although you couldn’t blame him because there was no way around it, that was what you were.

The moment he understood who you were he froze, eyes focusing on his hands under the table. You noticed how uneasy he became and with a look you asked Chifuyu to give you a minute, thankfully he understood and trusting you excused himself from the table.

You reached out, stilling your hand in the middle of the space between you when you saw him flinch, something that reminded you of the time when you encountered Leo for the first time; hurt and scared. Kazutora in a way resembled him, something lonely and broken about him that gave you the final push to get close.

Just like you did way back for Leo you extended your open hand towards him, facing upwards to show him that you had no ill intentions and you rested your hand on the table just a few centimeters away from his arm, not wanting to startle him but wanting to show him that you were trying to get close.

“I don’t hate you, Hanemiya-kun”

His gaze zeroed on your hand and then eyes of the color of the lightest brown you’ve ever seen; almost the same shade as amber; met yours wary and trembling but you simply nodded confirming that you were being completely honest.

“Why?” his voice came out broken.

“Because Keisuke cared about you” you smiled, feeling your eyes get watery and Kazutora’s face became blurry due to the tears.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I- I wish I could take it all back, I really do, I...” you heard the words come out cracked and you shook your head and reached for his arm.

“I know...it’s fine. Like I said, I don’t hate you, it’s been a while since that happened and I’ve made up my mind, I’ve already accepted it as part of life” that’s a lie and you know, you miss him every day so much that you still cling to the little things he left behind, that’s the reason why you haven’t been in a relationship after him.

You quickly wiped the tears out of your eyes and looked at him once more. “I’d like to be there for you, maybe be friends even, that is if you’d like that”

Kazutora’s mind was running laps. Was he hearing you correctly? Did you actually say that you wanted to be friends with him? Be friends with the guy that killed your boyfriend nonetheless. He couldn’t wrap his head around that thought, it was simply impossible, he was a villain, a rotten fruit that nobody had ever liked and that poisoned the only good things he had in his life, why would anyone want to be near him?

First there was Chifuyu; who for all he could gather used to consider Baji as his best friend; welcoming him into his apartment, offering him a place to stay and even a job no questions asked, that was already hard to understand, but now having you willing to welcome him? That was almost ridiculous because you surely knew, he saw the way you interacted with Chifuyu, there was no way in hell he didn’t tell you, so why?

Why were you being kind to him? So gentle? Why couldn’t you just scream and curse him? Heaven knows for how long he has been cursing himself, regretting everything he did, from Shinichiro to Baji. He deserved to be yelled at, to be shunned away from society, he was deserving of pain and should be tossed to the abyss of loneliness, forever in the dark, far away from the sun.

He couldn’t fathom why on God's name was Baji’s girlfriend in front of him extending her delicate hand towards him. But even when he couldn’t understand he wanted to accept it. He knew he deserved nothing given how he had taken two lives but he wanted the embrace so badly.

He wanted company, friends, he didn’t want to be forever an outcast due to his bad decisions but instead he wanted to belong, to feel some sort of comfort, he wanted to bask in the sun’s warmth and for once in a very long time feel a bit of peace, he wanted saving, someone to tell him he was worthy even when he knew he wasn’t.

He looked at you once more, and something felt warm inside his chest; even his throat tightening; when he saw that you were still smiling gently at him despite the rebel tears that had escaped from your eyes.

“I’d like that” he smiled wobbly. “Also, Kazutora is fine”

“Then let’s be friends, Kazutora-kun” your smile grew broader and that was the start.

Surprisingly after that, it didn’t take long for you to grow comfortable with each other. He was quiet and would often be found spacing off but he was considerate towards you, actually he returned the same kindness you gave him, although it was evident that he was still wary and a bit rough on the edges he tried hard and you could see, so whenever he was having a bad mood you tried not to take it personally.

Through gentle words and patience, you won him over, even those around you were surprised at how quickly he warmed up to you but there was just something in him that pulled you, maybe that same thing that pushed you to adopt Leo when you found him malnourished and hurt on your way home from the cemetery or maybe it was something else.

Just as he warmed up to you, you warmed up to him. It was easy to talk to him, he was always willing to lend you an attentive ear, listening to your ramblings about the monotonous things that happened at the clinic, it didn’t matter that he knew nothing about the people you mentioned, he always listened like it was the most important thing in the world.

At first your interactions were always in company of Chifuyu, mostly at the shop while you went to visit which actually ended in you helping around to organize the merchandise or on the usual checkups on the animals to ensure that they were in the utmost condition for the moment someone decided to welcome them into their home.

Then, Kazutora started to walk you to the station but slowly that turned into him accompanying you all the way home and since he was taking the time to go with you you started offering him a cup of tea at your house before he’d leave again to get back to his and Chifuyu’s place.

That wasn’t the end of it because one cup of tea turned into two, then three and finally what started as a thanks for the inconvenience turned into hours-long talks about the most menial things just because.

Your cats loved him; Blue was always rubbing himself against his legs while Leo wasted no time to go lay on his legs and with a meow demand to be petted at the moment; but the most amazing thing of all was that Jin didn’t hate him, in fact he got way too comfortable with him which was a thing that you’d never seen, the only other person besides yourself that he liked was Hina, hell, not even Chifuyu had been able to charm the bigger cat and now apparently he didn’t mind Kazutora trailing behind you when even up to that day whenever he was visiting Chifuyu would get a growl from Jin but not Kazutora.

He was nice to your babies, he liked them and you could see that he didn’t change his demeanour towards them even when he thought you weren’t looking, in fact his voice got softer when directed at them and you were also the kind of person that trusted animal’s perception so the fact that your beloved cats liked him really told you that he had changed from what little you knew about his ways before being sent to prison after Baji’s death.

Kazutora started noticing the little things about you, for starters the way you’d always be singing a random thing off tune but with such energy that it was amusing but when asked he’d swear on his life that he wasn’t bothered that he actually liked it even though you knew very well that you weren’t a good singer but the opposite yet there was something powerful about having him joining in the middle of your singing, even when he didn’t know the lyrics he’d be humming along.

You were a sight to behold for him because in all the mess of his life he had never encountered someone as lively as yourself. Even after losing Baji you tried your best, you were determined and hardworking and so kind, not only to him but to every living thing no matter if they were animals, people or even plants, you amazed him because you were always so willing to be gentle to anyone.

You were a soothing presence.

That was not to say you didn’t have your bad days, after all you were only human and it was simply impossible to be at one hundred percent everyday the whole day, but you pushed through and you were always quick to ask for forgiveness if you had an outburst towards someone, you were the kind to not withhold apologies even when you weren’t at fault. He could remember a handful of times in which you apologized when he was the one to step on your toes.

You, of all people apologized to him, a social reject, a vermin, you apologized to him as if he was worthy, as if that was the logical thing to do but he knew that no matter what you did he knew that he was the one that still owed you a lifetime of apologies.

He wasn’t an idiot, he knew how much Baji meant to you even to that day, he noticed the little pieces of him lingering in your everyday, like how you always wore a hair tie around your wrist even when your hair was way too short for you to ever need it and whenever you had to get your bangs out of your face you used hair clips, never the tie on your wrist, the way you always cracked your knuckles as if getting ready for a fight even if you were only checking the animals and the way you carried yourself in a way resembled the way Baji used to.

He never told you but a few times he found you at the cemetery by coincidence while visiting Baji and there was something heartbreaking about seeing you kneeling on the ground with trembling shoulders despite it being a hot day. He regretted what he did, not only because he felt guilty or ‘cause he missed his friend but also for your sake because he wanted to see your happy smile, he never wanted to hear your cries ever again.

Just like him, you started seeking his company more and more, not only were you inviting him to stay and talk after walking you home but you made plans with him and just him, to go window shopping, for a cup of coffee, lunch dates, movie premieres; because you liked going to the movies so much and discovered that he was an enthusiast as much as you; movies on the couch, even just lazy sundays at your house playing the entire day with your cats.

Of course reaching this state was quick yet slow, it was hard to explain, like you were close to him and enjoyed his company, but it was different than it was with Hina or even Chifuyu yet you wouldn’t call it romantic, not at first.

Sure, there was something to Kazutora, you weren’t blind so you could see clear as day that he was rather handsome, probably one of the prettiest guys you’d ever met but there was something more, something that pulled you, something broken and lonely that tugged at your heart and told you to care for him.

At such a young age he had been to prison on two occasions and you could actually see that that was simply the tip of the iceberg. He had to mature too soon, he mentioned vaguely that his relation with his parents wasn’t the best and his eyes at times looked older than he actually was, plus it took a long time for him to get used to your affectionate ways because your love-language was physical touch. You had a special fascination with hair and all of your friends were used to that but Kazutora was like a kicked puppy that was only learning to trust in people once more.

You were a new breeze of air into his life, with your caring ways and funny nature he fell. For the first time in his life he had someone like you, at first it was difficult for him to realize that the fuzzy feeling inside his gut whenever he looked at you or even heard your voice meant what people called love but it was a given because he had never felt that way before.

For the longest time he felt like love was a lie, he remembered how bad his home life was, how strained and full of pain the things between his parents were, even now from time to time he had nightmares of his mother crying as his father hit her and then her begging him; only a child; to pick sides.

He wanted to hold you close, to keep you away from harm and to listen to your laugh for days on end, for once his heartbeat quickened for someone, he found a safe place in your presence, you were an oasis after years roaming the desert. You were such an unusual kind of certainty in his life that he never had but that he had searched for so long.

While Kazutora realized rather quickly; in comparison to you; that you had wormed your way into his heart making a home for you it took you around three years and others pointing it out for you to actually realize that he meant to you more than a friend.

The first one was your mother although not as subtly but rather by saying that she was happy that you were now with Kazutora which took you by surprise because you weren’t.

That wasn’t the end of it, but only the beginning.

The next one was Hina one day you were sleeping over at her house, but the cherry on top was Chifuyu.

“Hey, I know it’s not really my business, but when are you going to get together?” he asked one time when you went out for coffee.

“What?” you asked mindlessly, stirring some sugar into your beverage.

“Yeah, you’re kind of driving me crazy, it’s kind of annoying feeling like a third-wheel without actually being one, just get it over with” he spoke before taking a sip from his own cup.

“What?” you snapped your head back to him.

“Is that the only thing you’re gonna say?” he looked at you through half-lidded eyes.

“Yes, because I honestly don’t understand a single thing of what you’re saying” you shook your head and took a sip from your coffee.

“What I’m saying is that it’s obvious that you like Kazutora” he said matter-of-factly.

“Of course I like him, he’s my friend, I like you too”.

“No, you don’t, you like me as your friend but you like Kazutora in a different way, a lovey-dovey way” he deadpanned.

“No, Kei-” you began just like you did whenever your mother used to bring up your love life or thereof lack of it.

“Baji-san has been gone for years already” he cut you, wincing as he said that and to you his words felt like a slap across your face.

“Look, I know, trust me, I do, but it’s been long enough and if there is someone that makes you feel good you should go for it, he wouldn’t want you being unhappy for him” he sighed and with a hand pushed his hair back.

“He asked me to take care of you because he wanted you to be alright, he wanted you to be happy and he’d probably punch me if I simply stood by and watched you being miserable” he pushed his cup to the side, leaned over the table to grab you by the shoulders and looked into your eyes seriously.

“I know you like him, don’t be an idiot, it’s painfully obvious with how you look at him and spend almost all of your free time with him, Baji-san won’t be mad at you for finding someone new and I believe that he’d be happy that it is Kazutora of all people”.

Before you could respond to that, the sound of a new message cut you off and when you looked sideways to your phone on the table, a soft smile graced your lips when Kazutora’s name appeared on the screen. Without thinking you opened it and it was some random video of a kitten; somewhere along the way it became a thing between you and it reminded you of how Keisuke used to send you daily pictures of the cats that went to his house.

“It’s Kazutora, right?” Your face grew hot once you came back to reality, remembering suddenly with whom you were and what you were talking about.

“I’ll let you be, but don’t be an idiot and let yourself be happy” and just like that Chifuyu ended that conversation and quickly changed topics.

You knew you liked him, you felt warm whenever he was around you, his voice soothed you even on the worst of days and you looked forward to his messages. You had learned to find comfort in his eyes but they were a wrong shade; not brown enough.

He wasn’t Keisuke. He’d never be.

A few days later you found yourself in the shop, helping around but constantly sending glances in his direction, his back facing towards you, looking painfully similar to Kei’s even down to the hair length, although the color wasn’t the right match with it’s blonde streaks you could still fool yourself into thinking it was him.

But then he’d turn to look at you and send a smile your way and there would be a beauty mark under golden eyes and a tiger tattoo where it shouldn’t have been and that smile was lacking a pair of prominent incisives peeking through.

You knew it was wrong to look at him searching for Keisuke, searching for your lost love in another, clinging to the remnants of his passing through the world but you missed him so much.

At times you felt like you couldn’t even breathe, you had even fallen asleep in front of his family grave after a long day if you went to visit at dawn after not being able to make it at morning but you had to visit him daily in order to feel in his company because if you ever thought of skipping a lump appeared in your chest crushing your heart.

Yet, even then, even when you realized it wasn’t Baji your heart would skip a bit and your stomach would twist.

Later that night you found yourself walking home with Kazutora by your side in complete but comfortable silence, feeling the warmth oozing from his arm that was left hanging at his side lightly brushing against yours, rising even the tiniest hair of your arm.

Kazutora had been going at it over and over for months. At first, when he realized what he felt for you he decided to bury it deep and forever carry it in silence but as time went on he craved your presence.

He started wishing for more, more smiles, those smiles to be only for him, he even found himself looking forward to getting hurt while playing with your cats because it meant that you would be cleaning up his hands and putting on a band-aid with the utmost care and attention even if they were the most insignificant scratches ever.

He liked having your attention, he liked that you replied to any message from him almost immediately; unless you were attending to a patient then you’d reply as soon as possible; he also liked how your eyes would get bigger whenever something amazed you or if you found something even remotely cute.

Your constant ramblings plagued his mind at every hour no matter if he was asleep. Hell, he even went to Baji’s grave to ask for permission to love you, even if he did so in silence he felt like he owed that much to his old friend because you were his girl after all.

Why did it have to be you? Why Baji’s? Why did you have to come into his life and be like the sun? You were too much for him, too perfect, too good while he was nothing but a mess, too fucked up, too far away from repair. For fuck’s sake, he was the one that took your boyfriend away, he would have been better off handling your hate but instead you were there giving him so much it almost pained him, only adding up to his guilt.

This had to be some sick game of the universe. God must have been having the time of his life laughing at how the killer fell in love with the victim’s old love.

Before any of you knew, you had already gotten home and like it became custom you invited him inside for a cup of tea.

As soon as you opened the door, your three babies rushed to the entryway to greet you, Jin being the very first, you hadn’t taken two steps inside when he was already brushing himself against your legs. The other two weren’t too far but to your disappointment Leo approached Kazutora before even looking at you.

“I’ll stop bringing you here, you’re stealing them away from me” you pouted while kneeling down to hug Jin who looked at Kazutora with no distaste, then you picked up Blue and let him nuzzle your neck, after that still holding him you went to rub Leo with your free hand once he finally took notice of you and remembered who bought him food and toys.

Kazutora’s hearty laugh filled your ears pulling your mouth from the pout into a smile.

“Leo knows who’s the cool one” he winked your way. “I’m kidding, he likes you more” he looked down at said cat “right pal? Isn’t your mom the absolute best?”

“Oh, shut up, flattery won’t take you anywhere” You felt blood rushing to your face so you stood up hiding your reddening face into Blue’s fur.

You hurried to the kitchen and then, out of his sight was when you put Blue down and started to boil some water, hearing over it as the door closed and seconds later Kazutora appeared with the other two trailing behind.

You ended up splayed on the bigger couch in your living room, your back leaning against his side while Jin laid on top of your legs while in Kazutora’s rested the other two cats. At that moment you were with your eyes closed, mindlessly caressing Jin while you listened to Kazutora talk to your cats in a baby voice that you wouldn’t have expected from him the first time you met.

For him it wasn’t easy to keep his cool, he had to school his face even if you weren’t looking at him and oh, his heart was so loud it was about to jump out of his chest and he wouldn’t mind but he didn’t want you to listen.

I’m sorry Baji.

A  meow of protest fell on deaf ears since he had stopped caressing Leo and Blue, instead turning his full attention towards you.

You turned your head and suddenly you found yourself way too close to his face; so much you could’ve counted every single of his lashes; staring up at a pair of golden eyes that were looking at you and only you as if you had been the one to hang up the stars in the sky.

His features were delicate, so beautiful it was heartstopping, he looked almost otherworldly; and not only because the ghost of Baji’s face lingered in his in a particular way; but there was a certain glimmer in his eyes that you had been noticing from a few days leading to that one, only that then it shined brighter than ever.

Unbeknownst to you, your eyes were reflecting Kazutora’s shine and your heart was beating to the same tempo as his starting up a melody of their own with your breathing getting caught up in your lungs making up the rhythm accompanying your song.

You were being drawn into each other like opposite poles of a magnet, barely any resistance was there and soon enough you met in the middle. At first it was the softest brush; like when you first dip your toe before jumping into the water; but it started a whole revolution inside both.

The brush became a second and then your lips were pressing against each other, basking in the warmth that radiated off that single contact that sparked a bunch of reactions at the same time. Your heart went off, your lungs closed; forgetting for that moment that they needed air and not that man to keep kissing you; and for the briefest moment your mind stopped thinking about Baji.

Kazutora was ready to die, if he was sent to hell at that very moment he’d be glad because at least he got a taste of heaven and it was more than enough. He decided then and there that he was bound to be cursed because how did a monster like him manage to get a kiss from an angel such as yourself? It must have been a sin for something so tainted to even look your way.

He didn’t know when your hand placed itself on the side of his neck but he knew that he was yours, if there was any doubt of that up until that point, it vanished with the way you were gently caressing his tattoo as if you were tracing it by memory, as if you had paid close attention to him, as if he mattered, as if he was something more than a broken thing.

Something inside you moved when a whimper escaped his lips the first time you pulled away for a mere second in order to get air before going in once more, this time ready to open your mouth and let him take while you explored. It felt nice, new; which was to be expected since the last time you had kissed someone this way had been with Baji.

Keisuke.

You opened your eyes and suddenly pulled away, almost as if his touch burned you; and in a way it could be said to be true; and your violent movement startled the three cats that you had ignored moments before, making them leave for your room.

The image of your beloved; death; boyfriend took Kazutora’s place, brown replaced gold and the beauty mark vanished, the yellow strands that framed his face turned jet black and the smile you’d been missing like crazy; that particularly his that showed his teeth was there.

You blinked a few times and his image left, allowing you to see Kazutora for who he was and not the ghost of him.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came to me” he looked at you with tears gathering in his eyes almost pleading and you realized how it must have looked to him.

“No, Tora, I-”

I’m an idiot, I blew this up. Again I’ve just gone and ruined what good I had.

“I’m going now” he stood up and left for the door, leaving you alone and cold on the couch.

I’m sorry Keisuke.

You stood up and went after, finding him in the doorway hastily putting on his shoes but you grasped his arm to stop him.

“I will leave right now, it’ll be like nothing happened” you caught a glimpse of a tear trailing down his cheek and that sight prompted you to speak.

“No” your other hand reached for the fabric of his shirt, securing him.

“Y/N”

“I don’t want you to leave, I-” the words choked you, there was too much you had to say and your mouth wasn’t responding as fast as you would’ve liked.

“Don’t ask me to stay because if you do it’ll only hurt more when you tell me it was a mistake”

“But it wasn’t a mistake, I want you, okay? Kazutora, I like you” you at least managed to say the one thing that was clear in your mind, that had been clear for a long time but only got accepted after that one conversation with Chifuyu.

That certainly stopped him, for he turned around to fully face you and you saw his eyes filled to the brim in tears that he refused to let run freely.

You reached for his face as slowly as the first time you two met, giving him enough space to retreat, but how could he when the thing he wanted most was to be with you and bask in the calm that your presence brought into his messy life? When he didn’t give any signs of pulling away you smiled and cupped his cheeks as if you were holding a piece of glass; and in a way Kazutora was just as fragile as that material when it came to you.

He leaned into your touch, and you were bold enough to pull him in and rest your foreheads together, looking with all seriousness into his eyes, having deja vu of the first day.

“Why? Why? I- what I did to Baji, you know what I’ve done, I don’t”

“I really can’t say, I just do, it’s, it’s hard, okay?” you closed your eyes for a brief second before continuing.

“I swore that there wouldn’t be anyone else and now, now you are here and I like being with you but I know that is way different from how it is with anyone else, it’s something more, something I never thought I’d be able to feel again”

He smiled through his tears because after all he’s done, every mistake in his life said that he didn’t deserve you and yet there you were.

“But I also have to be honest with you” he braced himself for what would be your next words.

“I still love Keisuke, I will probably still be loving him even fifty years from now and that is something that will never change, he was my first friend, first time holding hands, my first love, first kiss, many firsts, he took most of them” you gave out a wobbly smile.

“He’s forever imprinted in my skin and I’ll always be his” he lowered his gaze at that. “But if you can accept that I’m willing to try this, I never dated; not really, not an actual relationship; after him but I wouldn’t mind it being you, I think we deserve a chance”.

His heart was thumping inside his chest making it harder to process everything so you waited while his mind raced. Kazutora looked into your eyes and knew he had to take the chance because you were what he needed and even if he was undeserving you thought him worthy.

A selfish part of him, the bad side said that he should be glad because if Baji was there he knew you would have chosen him, a thousand times you’d have chosen Baji over Kazutora and that pained him but what pained him the most was the fact that a tiny part of him was happy because now he had the chance to be with you.

He was taking the life Baji should’ve had, but he’d take good care of you.

He could live being second best if that meant he got to have you.

[yandere-daydreams]

i need sugawara gaslighting the shit out of the reader and supplementing it with some sort of drug. missing homework? forgetting assignments? feels like shit man

I mean… He’s a kindergarten teacher, after the time-skip. I feel like coddling his Darling, or, making it so his Darling /needed/ to be coddled would sort be in his nature. Correct me if I’m wrong, though.

Title: Missing Assignments.

TW: Implied Non-Consensual Drug Use, Slight Non-Consensual Touching, Slight Infantalization, and Demeaning Behavior. 

~

Your hand-writing was getting worse.

It shouldn’t have been such a big deal. Everyone got a little messy from time to time, and it probably didn’t help that lately, you’ve been more prone drifting off than paying attention, zoning out or just stopping in the middle of a thought, interrupting your train of thought and turning smooth, graceful curves into jagged edges and smudged ink, the words just barely legible enough to let you see the sentence was gibberish, in its entirety. All your notes were like that, these days. Ever since the beginning of the school year, it’d been so hard to concentrate, so difficult to do anything but lay your head on your desk and go to sleep, even if your teachers were quickly growing fed-up with your impulsive naps. Normally, you might be able to make it up at home, go over your textbook and borrowed notes until you’d memorized everything you missed in class, but doing that now felt impossible when your bed was only an arm’s length away. It felt impossible when your bed wasn’t. Everything felt impossible all the time, and you were beginning to think it was.

Maybe you were the impossible one, the factor that made everything else useless.

Maybe you were the broken link.

“Everything alright, (Y/n)?”

You jerked up at the sound of someone else’s voice, forcing you out of your stupor as you tore your attention away from the paper laid out in front of you, an essay you were supposed to turn-in last week, but only managed to finish the night before. Your instructor was lenient, thankfully, silently assuming there was some quiet, shameful reason one of her best students was suddenly falling behind, but you’d just been too exhausted to think about doing it any sooner. Too drained. Too incompetent.

Biting down on the edge of your tongue, you forced yourself to face Sugawara, kind, patient Sugawara. He’d never moved, but you’d managed to forget he was there, his calm tranquility allowing him to fade into the background as the two of you sat in Karasuno’s courtyard, perched on the edge of a garden wall. You hadn’t asked, but he’d promised to help you during lunch, even if he seemed more than content to peer over your shoulder as you glared at your composition, judging but never commenting. Never critiquing, not you out loud, at least. “You know I’m not,” You mumbled, your voice so low, you could only hope he wouldn’t hear you. “It’s awful and it’s late. I’d probably be better off asking for another extension, or breaking my hands and praying someone feels bad enough to give me a passing grade.”

“Don’t be so pessimistic,” Sugawara replied, his tone light, unaffected. Sympathetic, but not nearly as involved as someone so committed to their self-imposed role should be. “It can’t be that bad. I’ve seen the way you write, you could take that assignment out in your sleep.”

The praise was nice, and yet, the sentiment rang hollow by the time it reached your ears. Another standard to live up to, another person you knew you’d let down, another friend you’d lose because suddenly, you only had the energy to breathe and sleep and eat, occasionally. Less than you should, despite Sugawara’s efforts to keep you well-fed. “I did write it in my sleep,” You sighed, crossing your arms over your chest. “I’ve barely been able to keep my eyes open. I think I’m getting sick, or dying, or something. I’ve been getting these headaches, for the past few weeks, and I’m just so tired--” You forced yourself to stop, to cut off your rant before it could begin. You didn’t want to complain, not when Sugawara was just trying to be nice. When you continued, you did so sheepishly, attempting to shrug off your frustration with a small smile and an airy laugh. “I guess… I don’t know. At this rate, it might be less embarrassing to drop-out early.”

This was usually the part where Sugawara comforted you. He’d slapped your back, tell you to keep your chin up, and you’d nod and grin and try to do better going forward, or, you’d promise to, and he’d act like he believed you. But, rather than lift your spirits, Sugawara only draped an arm over your shoulders and pulled you into his side, encouraging you to rest your head against him. It felt too intimate, too close, but as soon as you let yourself relax, felt his warmth and allowed your mind drift away from your plummeting academics, your body grew heavy, your eyes beginning to sting as they urged you to rest. You resisted, concentrating on a flower that's fallen onto the pavement instead, only looking away when the blossom got caught under another student’s heel. He hummed, gently, as if the sound alone would be enough to soothe you. For a moment, you wished it was. “That might not be so bad.”

Instantly, you were as awake as you’d ever been, more out of shock than determination. “It might not be… what?”

“It might not be so bad.” His small smile never wavered. If anything, it only grew wider as he glanced towards you, his expression softening into something reassuring. It was the look he gave to his struggling underclassmen, the look he gave to his teammates after a particularly bad play. As his friend, you’d never gotten it. As his equal, you hadn’t, but you guess you couldn’t count yourself as one of those, anymore. “Quitting wouldn’t be the end of the world. There’s always other options, and if you really think you’re going to fail, you shouldn’t waste everyone’s time. Going through that much just to pull out at the last minute would be… depressing. Annoying, even, if you already know you’re not going to graduate.”

You hated the way he said it. So casually, as if it was a fact, something bound to happen rather than an episode of burn-out you could get over, with enough time. As if giving up, dropping out, quitting wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Not if your life was the only one you’d ruin. “I'm not sure,” You managed, just as he was getting impatient. “College was the plan, it’s still the plan. I’m not sure how I’d--”

Sugawara made an awkward, breathless sound, his free hand rising to cover his mouth, and it took you a second too long to realize he was laughing. “You really think you’re going to college? You can barely stay awake on your own, do you think you’ll be able to pass an entrance exam?”

At that, you flinched, shied into yourself just a touch more than you had to. You hated it, you were beginning to hate him for it, but… you couldn’t say you disagreed. “What else can I do?” You asked, using what little strength you had left to grit your teeth. “There aren’t a lot of options for failures, Koshi.”

Now, you knew for a fact that he was grinning, the cruel tilt of his lips biting into your temple as he pushed a hasty, fleeting kiss into your hair. You didn’t try to stop it, didn’t try to get away, and for once, you thought you might’ve been able to. You just didn’t want to try and fail when it was so clear Sugawara already thought so little of you. “I’d take care of you, naturally,” He answered, as if it was the obvious solution. “After I graduate, we’d find an apartment together, and I’d take care of everything. Money, housework, all of it. You’d never have to lift a finger.” He paused, briefly, taking just long enough to half-heartedly pluck your essay off of your lap, scanning over the text as the paper creased between his fingers. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. Not when his gaze shifted back to you, slowly, arrogantly. As if you weren’t worth the time it took to talk to you. “I mean, it’s clear you can’t handle things on your own.”

You opened your mouth, but whatever you were going to say was drowned out by the bell, startling and deafening, even so far from the main building. Your argument was bitten back as you forced yourself to focus on your bag, instead, pulling it between you and Sugawara, desperate for a drink, a snack you’d missed, something to wash the bitter taste his words had left on your tongue, but Sugawara didn’t hesitate to take you by the wrist, thrusting a bottle of water into your hand, never giving you an option to refuse. “Don’t worry, I know how forgetful you can be,” He said, barely even bothering to avoid meeting your eyes.

“You’re just lucky you’ve got someone so thoughtful looking out for you.”

[jalapeno-princess]

Angel of Mine

College Boyfriend Mark X Reader

Genre: FLUFFIEST OF FLUFF, Doting boyfriend Mark that we all deserve

Word Count: 4.5K

Summary: You and your boyfriend Mark are cuddled up in your bed watching a movie when you are reminded that you have an essay due in a couple of hours that you haven’t even started on. Before you can completely break down, your boyfriend comes to your rescue and offers to write your paper for you. It’s in the moments of watching him so focused, typing away at your laptop do you realize how lucky you are to have Mark as a boyfriend.

A/N: Hey guys! So it’s the beginning of midterms here in Hawaii and i’ve already cried seven times I am not kidding you I have two semesters left of college and this is the hardest it’s ever been. I wrote this imagine for shits and giggles; i’ve never had a boyfriend before (HAHAHAHA CRIES IN FILIPINO AND KOREAN) so I wouldn’t know if there are guys out there who are actually like this (If you are, God bless you) (and if your boyfriend is like this, MARRY HIM) I actually watched a tiktok post on instagram right after I finished this where this girl said she was doing her boyfriend’s homework because he was stressed or whatever and if that isn’t couple goals than I don’t know what is (btw I do not condone having someone else do your homework) (especially if you force them to do it because you don’t want to it’s your responsibility and your education, but if they offer...it’s a different story) (LOL) anyways, enough of me blabbering, please enjoy reading while I cry in a corner.

“Remind me how I got myself in this situation again?” Your boyfriend gave you a knowing look and you couldn’t stop yourself from letting out a faint giggle at the sight of his furrowed brows.

“Because you love me.” He playfully rolled his eyes and continued typing away at your computer.

“Yeah, sometimes a little too much. But if I remember correctly, you promised to suck me off once I’m finished writing this damn thing, so don’t think I’m going to forget our agreement babe.”

To say you were a procrastinator would be the understatement of the year. Just a few hours ago, you and Mark were comfortably cuddled up together in bed while you both watched the live action version of Mulan. When your boyfriend excused himself to go use the bathroom, you decided to scroll through your Instagram while waiting.

After looking at a couple of posts from some of your friends and family, you were curious as to what everyone was doing and you found yourself going through some of their stories. Finals were less than two weeks away, so you were used to seeing your friends post pictures of them working their many assignments or studying for exams.

What you weren’t expecting to see was one of your classmate’s working on an essay for your English class that was apparently due in less than four hours. Only then did it hit you; you had yet to write the paper and it was worth 20% of your grade. For weeks, you told yourself you were going to start on it and when it was first assigned over two months ago, you thought you had all the time in the world.

Two months went by quicker than you could even fathom and you were frustrated with yourself for not writing it down on your calendar or completing it earlier. You practically ran over to your laptop and began looking up the rubric to see how your professor wanted you to write your essay and you could feel your heart sink to your stomach as soon as you read the requirements.

Mark was confused when he saw you no longer lying in the bed; the two of you decided to have a lazy day indoors and you’ve only left the bed twice to use the bathroom and to get something to snack on. This past week has been extremely rough on your mind and your body; so when you told Mark you had no intention on doing anything other than laying in bed and watching movies, he knew to trust your words.

“Baby, what are you doing?”

Your flustered expression only made him even more curious as to what could have happened in the few minutes he was in the bathroom for. You bit your bottom lip in frustration; knowing how Mark could be whenever it came to your education, you were afraid he was going to be upset once he found out you had only a few hours to write your essay. Since you were too much in shock to respond to him, he took matters in to his own hands and looked at your computer screen.

“Wait—I remember you mentioning this essay a couple of weeks ago—eight pages?! Six educational sources—and it’s due by 11:59 P.M. tonight—y/n what the hell?!”

This wasn’t the first time you waited till right before your assignment was due to start working on it. Matter a fact, most of your important assignments; research papers, group projects, essays and online tests were completed on the day they were due. Sometimes it was on purpose; you felt as if some of your best work were the ones you’d work on right before you were supposed to turn it in. You knew it had a lot to do with the fact that you felt pressured to do better knowing you had a time limit; but most of the time you were just lazy and didn’t want to do any work at all.

You and Mark knew about each and every single thing there is to know about one another. He knew of each and every beauty mark on your body and where it was located, he memorized all your aunt’s, uncle’s and cousin’s names, he knew the exact shade of blue that you claimed was your favorite color and he knew how you liked your tea in the morning.

The only thing he had no control over, was the way you handled your education. Mark thought the entire world of you; he believed you were the most hardworking, courageous, determined, generous and golden-hearted person he had the amazing pleasure of knowing. And he wasn’t being biased because you were his girlfriend, but you were the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen before. In his eyes, you were flawless; you could do no wrong—well; the only problem Mark really had whenever it came to you was the fact that you didn’t know how to prioritize your responsibilities.

After what happened to you right around the time you were introduced to one another, Mark would’ve thought that your mindset and outlook on how you managed everything going on in your life would change. He knew you were capable of great things; when you put your mind to it, you could finish any task that you were given and you were great with multitasking. Mark saw how much time, persistence and effort you would put in to your job or whenever you’d lend a hand to anyone who needed assistance; he admired your work ethic and how passionate you could get when it came to the people and things that you loved.

It was just harder for you to put time in to your essays, journals, blogs or reading the books your professors would assign. School was never something you ever really cared for; it wasn’t like you were really learning anything anyway. For years, you tried your best in being good at all subjects. You’d stay up studying for hours on end only to not retain any information that you learned and it wasn’t entirely your fault. The educational system was just fucked. In this generation, it isn’t even about learning anything; the main focus is turning in assignments on time.

The professors could give less of a shit whether or not you understand any of the material being taught. During your relationship, Mark tried his best to motivate you and even bribed you with food and kisses. He even offered to make flashcards for you if that meant you’d have an easier time studying, but nothing ever worked.

As much as he wanted you to be successful with your education, especially because he genuinely loved attending school, he knew not to force anything on you and making matters worse. This time was different though; this class was one you were already having a hard time with and this essay in particular would determine whether or not you pass or fail by the end of the semester. Your boyfriend tried his best to hide his disappointment, but it was only natural for him to be upset. Attending college was not cheap at all.

He was completely aware of the thousands of dollars you had to fund on your own because your parents weren’t able to help you financially as much as they wish they could. Since he was extremely supportive of you and each and every single one of your endeavors, he even helped pay for quite a bit of your tuition which you haven’t completely forgave him for, but you both showed him and told him on a daily basis how grateful you were that he did such a thing; and that he never fails to take care of you in ways you didn’t think you deserved.

A part of him wanted to continue his poor attempt at scolding you, but as soon as he saw tears building up at the brim of your eyelids, all his anger and frustration dissipated. If there was anything Mark hated, it was seeing you cry. The reason behind your tears didn’t matter; it just broke his heart knowing you were sad and right now, he pushed the idea of your procrastination to the back of his mind. He motioned for you to stand up and kissed both your cheeks to get rid of any trace of tears. Then, he pulled you in to his embrace and placed his chin on the top of your head before he comfortingly ran his hands up and down your back.

“I’m so sorry Mark—I’m sure you’re upset with me and you have every right to be—I’m so stupid—“ if this were under different circumstances, the cheeky pinch on your butt would’ve earned your boyfriend a punch to the shoulder, but you knew this was his way to stop you from degrading yourself. Before you could ever say anything negative about yourself, Mark would try and divert your attention away from bad mouthing yourself.

Although you and Mark were together for three years now and you knew he was the man you planned on spending the rest of your life with, there was an annoying voice in your head that would remind you almost every single day that you didn’t deserve him. He’s sacrificed so much for you and you knew it was because he loved you; but you never understood why. You weren’t anything special; sure, you loved him with every fiber of your being and you knew he was well aware of that. Yet, you knew he deserved so much more but there was no way you’d ever be able to let him go. Not when he was the one who saved your life all those years ago. The only person who meant anything to you.

As much as you loved your family and your friends, nobody could ever compare or mean as much to you. Nobody could ever be as important as Mark was. He was the only person you were sure you would die from heartbreak if you were to lose him. It was selfish of you to continue dragging him down with you and your toxic ways, but you needed Mark; you’d be nothing without him. He was your own personal guardian angel sent to change your life entirely for the better. He was the only good thing going for you and with the way he treated you as if you were the most fragile and rarest jewel in the world, you knew he wasn’t going anywhere.

“You’re not stupid baby—a little irresponsible and careless, but not at all stupid. Hmph, I’ll tell you what, seeing as how I’m better when it comes to writing essays, let me handle it this time.”

“No, there’s no way in hell I’m going to let you do this assignment for me Mark, I’d rather take the F—“ the soft kiss he placed on the corner of your lips made it aware that Mark meant business. Whenever he’d say something, he meant it. However, you refused to allow him to work on something you kept pushing back for months. Your essay was your full responsibility and it wouldn’t be fair for your boyfriend to have to write something he didn’t benefit from in such a small amount of time. God, he really did love you.

“The more time you spend trying to talk me out of helping you when I already made my mind up, the less time I’ll have to work on this paper. I don’t want you stressing over this; you’re already so worn-out as it is. This’ll be a piece of cake babe—you just sit on the bed and look pretty while I get started.”

Mark had to be a figment of your imagination. There was no way someone as thoughtful, kind-hearted, selfless and caring as him could exist. Most people would groan at the idea of having to do more work and if it were anyone else, you were sure you would’ve gotten a completely different reaction. You were quick to pull him in to a tight hug and left multiple chaste kisses all across of his face.

“I love you—more than I can ever fathom in to words Mark Tuan. You don’t understand how much this means to me—I’ll do anything you ask of me. Ugh, I will never get over how amazing you are and I could never thank you enough for all that you do for me.” He cupped your cheek and placed a wet kiss on your jaw.

“Anything huh? Maybe you could do some loads of my laundry, but that’s pretty much it—oh. I um—maybe you could—ah never mind.” You looked at him in curiosity and giggled when you saw the apples of his cheeks grow pink with embarrassment. Whatever he was probably referring to had to be something he was shy about. Your boyfriend was the definition of an introvert and he had a hard time asking people questions or even favors; this sometimes also included you. If you wanted to know what was on his mind, you’d have to pry it out of him.

“What is it babe?” He gave you the most adorable shrug and nibbled on his bottom lip as he began to look everywhere around the room but at you.

“Don’t feel as if you have to do this for me, I really don’t expect anything from you, but I wouldn’t mind a blow job if you’re up for it later.” One thing you loved the most about Mark, was how gentle and awkward he would get whenever it came to initiating sex or insinuating that he wanted a sexual favor from you. It was cute, yet it also turned you on for some reason. Maybe it was because he’d act totally innocent and submissive since he never wanted you to feel uncomfortable and he preferred to take things at your pace; but once the two of you actually made love, his attitude would take a 360 degree turn.

Sex with Mark was your favorite past time; he could get very naughty and rough in bed, but he could also take things slow and sensually. It really depended on the mood, but your boyfriend was an extremely generous and passionate lover. He knew what you liked, what positions you enjoyed the most, how to lick, bite and suck on all your sensitive body parts in order to elicit any kind of needy reaction out of you. It really boggled your mind that someone like Mark—someone so perfect without a flaw at all actually existed and what was harder to believe was that you were the lucky girl who was extremely blessed to call him yours.

That was something you would never take for granted; nor did you think you would ever get used to having him in your life. You seductively made your way on to his lap and began leaving sloppy kisses against his nape. This beautiful man sitting in front of you was willing to do your homework in order to prevent you from having a mental breakdown. He was willing to sacrifice his time to work on an assignment that wasn’t his responsibility to take care of just so that you didn’t have to suffer. Honestly, what world war did you fight and win in your past life to be the one that receives Mark’s love every single day? Whatever it is that you did to be able to call Mark your boyfriend, you would do it again and again if it meant having him in each and every single lifetime.

“Fuck—babe—as good as that feels, I only have three hours—y/n—you know, I’m actually thinking about taking you on your offer—just settle for the F and I’ll get settled in between your pretty thighs—“ you couldn’t help but stifle back a giggle once you heard the soft whine fall from his lips after you got up from off his lap, but he was right. He was already doing your homework for you, the least you could do was sit on the side and prevent yourself from bothering him.

“Oh yeah—you’re definitely taking me down your throat as soon as I turn in this paper. Now do as I said and sit down on the bed. Your presence alone is such a distraction and fuck—I’ve been hard since this morning when you walked out in my shirt. Damnit y/n—I really want to have my way with you right now. Please use this experience for future reference. I can’t believe I’m being cockblocked by a research paper of all things.”

You watched as Mark quickly skimmed through the rubric; you knew your boyfriend wanted to make sure he understood the material before typing out a bunch of nonsense. The last thing he needed was to spend all this time and effort looking for resources, citing them and looking for both spelling and grammatical errors only to earn you a bad grade. If Mark wasn’t there and you just so happened to find out about the essay, you wouldn’t have even attempted to write anything.

Your mindset in college was that if it seemed impossible, you would just give up on it entirely. Mark’s mindset however, was more realistic and you wished you had the motivation and enthusiasm that seemed to live in his bloodstream. Watching him so focused as he typed away like nothing was such an inspiring sight. English was one of your boyfriend’s favorite subjects; he loved reading all kinds of books—from murder mystery to comics and romance novels, Mark always preferred reading over watching a movie or television shows.

But, if there was anything he enjoyed more than reading, it was writing. Normally, the day his professor would assign him an essay, proposal, research paper or journal entry was the same day he would complete it and turn it it. There had to be something wrong with him. What person in their right mind genuinely enjoyed writing thousands of words, making sure there weren’t any errors and that the paper in its entirety actually made sense? You knew not to bother him, but you couldn’t help staring at him in all his handsome glory. His brows were furrowed and he began biting his lip in concentration; you didn’t think it was possible for someone to look like a model straight from an ad or a magazine while typing out an English paper.

“Can I get you something to eat or drink babe?” He quickly shook his head in disagreement without even looking up—he was too focused in whatever it was he could be typing.

“I think I need a couple of kisses though, you know—to help me reenergize.” You playfully rolled your eyes at his cheeky request before getting up and placing a few soft kisses against his mouth.

“So how’s it coming out?” He scrunched his nose before giving you a slight shrug.

“If I’m being honest, this probably isn’t my best work, but I’m sure it’s fine. I’m almost done by the way—so I’ll have you look it over to make sure it’s to your liking and then you can turn it in. Maybe you should start preparing your gratuity and tie your hair up. Might as well take your pants off while you’re at it—ow! I’d be careful if I were you baby. I might just replace your name with mine and confuse the shit out of your professor—yeah, that’s what I thought. Now, be a good girl and return back to bed.”

As much as you wanted to continue messing around with him; only because you were enjoying how demanding he would get when he was under stress, you knew better than to distract him. You decided to find something else to occupy yourself with as Mark returned to typing profusely at your laptop. It was extremely fascinating how he didn’t even take a second to think about what to write. The words seemed to just flow out of his brain like it was the easiest thing in the world and you were growing envious of his ability to come out with such quality and detailed work in such a small amount of time.

Around twenty minutes later, Mark let out a sigh of relief and brought his hands behind his back—a sign that he was finally finished. He motioned for you to walk over to your desk and had you sit on his lap. Out of habit, he snaked his arms around your waist and placed his chin on your shoulder; wanting to be as close to you as possible.

“Ten pages, twelve sources and it’s only 9:15. Tell me what you think baby.”

Right as you finished reading just the first paragraph alone, you were at a loss for words. Even if you were to start writing this paper when you first received the assignment from your professor, you were sure nothing you could write would be at least half as amazing as this paper was. It wasn’t repetitive—nor did he use nonsense words or anything you were sure you probably would have added in. He put all his sources in alphabetical order and inserted page numbers at the bottom of each page.

You could see why Mark’s previous English professor had asked him on multiple occasions to be her TA. The word brilliant wasn’t even enough to describe the kind of student Mark was. For someone who never really cared about reading English papers; whether it was an assignment for class, or when you had to give constructive criticism on one of your fellow classmate’s work, you would always skim through their essays—but you found yourself reading each and every single word Mark had typed out. His essay had you hooked; it was one of those writings that you were sure anyone would actually enjoy having to read. How was he able to finish all of that so quickly? By the end of it, you were in tears and you didn’t even realize you were crying until you felt Mark giggle in to your neck.

“Why are you crying Bub? I don’t think what I’ve written is at all that depressing. I literally wrote about biodegradation and how to save the earth—“

You didn’t give him any chance to continue his explanation as you roughly smashed your lips against his. Mark did so many things for you on a daily basis. He didn’t have to say he loved you for you to know that he did—his actions spoke for him. Knowing how most guys could be, you were sure no boyfriend would waste his time completing an assignment, especially one so time consuming needed all your knowledge and effort—for his girlfriend.

College was rough on everyone; so to take on something you thought was extremely difficult in order to prevent you from stressing out more than you already were—it made tears fall from the brim of your eyelids. You continued your ministrations, licking his lips and bringing both the bottom and the top in between your teeth before sucking on his tongue. Feeling him hum in to your mouth sent warmth to your core. In your relationship, you were the more extroverted and talkative one. You could go on and on about any subject you were passionate about.

However, just like Mark; you were more about actions than words—mainly because you felt like there weren’t enough words in the English dictionary to actually form sentences that would describe just how much you loved Mark wholeheartedly and exactly what he meant to you. When you felt his excitement press up against your ass, you knew what was right about to happen; but you wanted him to know verbally how grateful you were for him before showing him physically.

“Fuck—how did you—what kind of drug are you on Mark? That was one of the best essays I’ve ever read. There’s no way my professor is going to believe I wrote that. This is honors worthy—you’re—I can’t even find a word good enough to describe you. Otherworldly? Wonderful? Perfect? I love you so much Mark. Fuck, do I love you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I don’t know what I did to have you in my life, but I would do it again and again to have you forever. I know you hate when I say this, but it’s the truth baby—I really don’t deserve you. Thank you, not just for typing this essay—fuck I still can’t even process this entire situation you need to sign up for scholarships or some shit you are so fucking intelligent and such a hardworking student. But—thank you for loving me. You really are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I am forever grateful for whoever it was that decided to bless me with you as my soulmate. I love you Mark Tuan.” His wide grin and the way he looked at you so adoringly made your heart melt.

“I’d do anything for you—you know that baby. It’s just—seeing you so distressed—so frustrated and unhappy with school, watching you overwork yourself to the bone—it fucking sucks. Especially when I see you beating yourself up over grades you have no control over. I know you try your best in every single thing that you do and I know that it’s easy to forget some important things and fall behind, but I will always be there to catch you—and to assure you that everything is going to be okay. You’re my person y/n—it’s my life duty to take care of you. However—don’t get used to this baby, as much as I love you—trust me—I love you with every breath I take and with every beat of my heart—but shit, that was rough. Oh—and I never want to hear you say you don’t deserve me ever again. You take care of me just as much as I take care of you. It’s a team effort babe. Now, with that being said, you caused a big problem in my pants over half an hour ago and I think it’s time that you solved it.”

[another-tmnt-writer]

She Made You Hot!

Leo x Reader

Author: Mo

Summary: You’re playing the Sims 4 at the Lair when Leo makes a discovery…

Note: Idk what this is but I was feeling it. I also made the TMNT on the Sims 4 and Leo came out REALLY hot so *shrugs* have this. (Also the Christmas sale is coming up and usually they have the base game for pretty cheap, just a protip.)

Warnings: None?

Word Count: 1.4k

When it started to get cold outside, you were especially grateful for the plentiful space heaters Donnie had installed in the Lair. The new lair was so much bigger and nicer than the old one, and it was a great place to hang out and wind down once your exams were all done and your break had started. So, that was just what you were doing, sitting in the lair, snuggled up under your coziest blue blanket and playing the Sims 4.

“What’cha doing?” Mikey asked, hopping over the back of the couch and flopping onto its soft surface, his head almost in your lap. “What game is that?”

“The Sims.”

“I’ve heard of that!” He smiled, shifting to a sitting spot beside you. “Isn’t that the one where everyone’s having a million babies or something?”

“The one hundred baby challenge, yes. I have attempted many times, but it takes a lot of patience that I don’t have. So instead, I’m trying out the new college stuff.”

“Oh, cool!” Mikey thought for a second before getting up and bolting off to go get the gaming laptop Donnie had built for him. He came back a few minutes later and booted up one of the games Donnie had downloaded for him that he’d overlooked until then: the Sims 4. “So how do I play?”

“Well, you make a sim and then you just…control them. They can get married and have kids and get a job. And they can like go on adventures and stuff. Or you can be a vampire or an alien or a—”

“MERMAN!” Mikey exclaimed, playing with the options on Create-a-Sim. He dragged the sliders back and forth, playing with body proportions. “Ugh, I don’t even know where to start.”

“You can do whatever you want, dude. Just have fun with it.” You laughed. You thought for a second and then something clicked. Shit. You’d left your medication at home. “Ah, shit. I’ll be right back. I left my meds in my apartment.” You shook your head and stood up, setting your laptop on the coffee table. You opened up your sims Library and left it there. “You can look through my library if you need some inspiration, Mikey. I’m kind of a Sims veteran.”

“Thanks, dude!” Mikey set to work, and as soon as you were gone, he started scrolling through all of the Sims you had saved. His eyebrows crinkled when he got to a group of four. Huh. Interesting. Clicking on it enabled him to look at the names you’d given them, which only confirmed the suspicions he’d had from looking at the colors you’d dressed them in: you made him and his brothers!

“Are you supposed to be messing with Y/N’s laptop?” Leo asked, ever the defensive one, especially when it came to your stuff. If that wasn’t a huge tell of his giant crush on you, Mikey didn’t know what was.

“She said I could, I promise. She’s letting me look through her sims.”

“Oh, the Sims! I thought you’d like that game.” Donnie perked up, interested. He walked over from the doorway of his lab, sitting down next to Mikey. “Wait a second, is that—?"

“Dude I think it’s us.” Mikey was uncertain. “But as humans?”

“Lemme see.” Raph leaned over the back of the couch and looked over the group of sims, paying special attention to the one in red. “Yo, I think it is us. Look, she made Donnie a dork!”

“He is a GEEK, and that is a badge I wear proudly, thank you very much.” Donnie pointed to one of his assigned traits.

Mikey clicked on Leo to get a closer look at him next and his eyes widened. “Yo, what the fuck?”

“What?” Leo, who was finally curious enough to wander over and breach your privacy, asked. “What is it?”

“She made you hot!”

“Did she really—?" Leo’s cheeks went pink and he got a look for himself. Oh yeah. You’d made him hot. Big time. Defined six-pack, a dark head of hair and soulful blue eyes, a strong jawline, tan skin. His face felt warm. He was positive he was overheating. “Holy shit…”

“Dude that means you have to shoot your shot!” Mikey turned to look at his oldest brother. “She totally likes you!”

“Well, I don’t know about that…” Leo reached up to rub the back of his neck. “Maybe she just…I don’t know…”

“Come on, fearless.” Raph shook his head. “You’re the only one of us that has a real shot at getting a girlfriend. Are you really gonna let that pass without shooting your shot?”

“Ugh, guys, it’s not that simple! She’s…well, you know…” Leo sighed, shaking his head before saying softly, “human.”

“Shoot your shot.” Mikey started chanting. “Shoot your shot! Shoot your shot! Shoot your shot!”

Soon after, Raph and Donnie joined in. “SHOOT YOUR SHOT! SHOOT YOUR SHOT!”

“Okay, okay, okay, stop it.” Leo waved his hands and his brothers finally stopped. “Fine. I’ll talk to her.”

“YEAHHHHH!”

Once he’d made the promise to his brothers, he walked off to go trim his bonsai and sharpen his swords. And just in time, too, because only a minute or two later, you returned with a stack of movies. You popped one in and settled back into your spot beside Mikey, Simming away into the night.

***

It wasn’t until hours later that you decided to head home for the night, packing up your laptop and other things and slinging your bag over your shoulder. You bundled up warm in your jacket and the blue scarf you’d spent a few days knitting.

Just as you were about to head out, Leo came out of his room. “Hey, it’s dark out. Want me to walk you home?”

“Yeah, that’d be great, Leo. Thank you.” You blushed, brushing hair behind your ear. He helped you up out of the lair and you started the walk through the snow-covered city, snow crunching beneath your boots with every step. After a few quiet minutes, you reached your apartment, and he climbed up the fire escape while you went around the front and let him in the window. “Want some cocoa? I have a bunch in the kitchen.”

“Yeah, sure. Thank you.” He smiled and followed you further into the house, brushing the snow off of him. He sat at the island in the kitchen while you whipped up two mugs of your famous cocoa. “Hey, so, uh, Mikey had this…crazy idea today…”

“Oh yeah? And what would that be?”

“So he thought that maybe, you might possibly…have a crush on me? But that’s ridiculous, right?”

You froze in place, your spoon no longer stirring around your mug. “I don’t think that’s…ridiculous…”

“No?” Leo’s heart was pounding against his plastron. In what crazy world was this his actual reality?

“No, I don’t.” You shook your head. “I actually…well, Leo, honestly, who wouldn’t have a crush on you?”

He almost choked. “Come again?”

“I’m serious. You’re tall, you’re strong, your handsome, you’re muscular, and don’t even get me started on your tattoos.” You turned around to face him, eyes studying his handsome features. “Not to mention the fact that you’re a gentleman, and you’re patient, and you’re kind, and you’re a really good listener.”

“Yeah?” He grinned.

You slid him a steaming mug of cocoa. “Total boyfriend material.”

“And you don’t care that I’m…well, this?” He motioned to himself, his mutated, scaly form.

“That you’re what?” You raised an eyebrow and walked around the island to him.

“Y/N, you’re a beautiful, talented human girl and you could have anyone on the planet. There are so many guys out there that could give you something…normal.”

“Normal is vastly overrated.”

“You stole that from Halloweentown.”

“Mayhaps I did, but it’s true.” You shrugged. “I’ll take my chances.”

Leo took a step closer to you. He didn’t know what had come over him, but he was grateful for the courage. Slowly, giving you plenty of time to push him off, he leaned in. One of your perfect little human hands rose to tilt his face towards yours and the other rested on his firm chest. You pressed your lips against his, kissing him softly and slowly. He did the same, his giant green hands settling around your waist. He hoisted you up onto the counter so he didn’t have to lean down so far and kissed you gently.

When he pulled away, he chuckled quietly, leaning back in to kiss the corner of your lips and then your cheeks and then your forehead, until finally, he took you in his arms, cradling your head against his strong chest.

“So, do you want to be my girlfriend?” He asked.

You laughed, nodding against him. “Yes, Leo. I’d very much like to be your girlfriend.”

[bl--ankhaeji]

It all started with a washer(Taeyong)

Pairing - Fashion Design student*TaeyongXCeramics student*Reader

Genre - fluff, slight angst (if you blink it’s gone), slight enemies to lovers(again blink and you miss it), friends to lover, college au, tutor*Taeyong 

Warning/AN - learning disabilities and mentions of shitty parenting, also really abrupt ending cause I had no idea how to end so im sorreh (unedited not like any of my shit is though)

W.Count - 2253

The way you met Taeyong was pretty hectic 

It was 2 a.m. and you both were in the laundry room on the 4th floor of the apartment building

Surprisingly you two weren’t the only ones who needed a late night laundry run

That shit was PACKED 

Well as packed as a laundry room that only has three washers and three dryers can get 

You had to wait in a short line to be able to even get a washer even though all you had to wash were your clothes from the previous week

You had just enough washing powder left to wash the little clothes you had 

You really just wanted to do your laundry go back to your room open a bottle of cheap wine and drink away the pain you had from your Chemistry exam that you’re pretty sure you failed earlier that day or should you say yesterday

*Le Gasp* Finally a washer is open 

You rush to get there before it’s taken only to make there at the same time as some boy

You both immediately turn toward each other to look at the person who dared to steal the washer you so rightfully deserve

“This washer’s mine” 

“This is my washer” 

You both managed to say at the same time only to pull equally incredulous looks at each other

“I got here first” You both exclaim at the same time and that was like the spark that lit the fire

Not the love fire but like a hate fire lol

A stared down like no other between you two fighting for the washer soon commenced and it looked like neither of you were backing down

You both stood there and glared at each other’s face until a whole new washer became open 

The boy saw it and walked to go to that one instead of the one being stolen from him by some girl who looked about as ruff as his scalp is 

Please pray for TaeTae’s scalp...ok

Only for the washer to get taken by some kid 

His only choice was to go back to his old washer 

Once you saw the boy coming back you immediately closed the lid on the washer and turned to look at him with a humph 

“Too late this washer’s taken by its rightful owner”

If that didn’t irk him in the worst way then nothing did 

That slightly reminded him of his little brother’s annoying friend, what's his name...Doeyuck…

“Look ok I just need to wash my clothes so that I can go to my room and splurge on the possibly life threatening amount of sweets I just bought as a reward for passing my Chemistry exam. Can you please just let me share the washer with you?”

You started to consider letting him use the washer with you then you realize what he said….HE HAS SWEETS and he passed the chemistry exam, but HE HAS SWEETS 

“Ok, I’ll let you use it but only if I get to have my pick at two sweets or if it’s candy then one handful. Do we have a deal?” 

You could see the pout form on his lips only be offset by a slow nod of agreement to which you rejoiced with a quick Yes and opened the lid 

When the clothes finished you both realized that meant that you would also have to share a dryer to which you both looked at each other and raised your shoulders

Even though you both still weren’t on the best of terms you still tolerated each other for the sake of your clothing

Later that night after you have taken your pick of treats from the boy whose name you still didn’t know you retreated to you couch with your wine bottle in one hand and the tv remote in the other 

When it’s the next week and you’re in your Chemistry class your teacher passes out the tests 

To which you can see and confirm that you indeed did fail it

BADLY 

Your teacher asks you to stay back once class is over to discuss something with you 

She recommends you a tutor by the name of Lee Taeyong 

Says he has the highest grades in her class

At first you decline until she tells you that you might not be able to pass this semester if you don’t get help 

You begrudgingly agree to meet this tAeYoNg tomorrow in the upstairs private library room

The dreaded meetup is finally here and you walk into the room with anxiety threatening to bubble over to see 

“WASHER STEALING SWEETS BOY” 

You walk over to the startled boy and see that he has irritation written all over his face “Please don’t tell my you’re the girl I’m tutoring”

“Yup That’s Me”

He starts to regret his life choices and wonder ‘Why Me’ 

He gets started on the tutoring only to realize that you...really don't know anything 

If your lost look said anything 

“Do you even pay attention at all in class” 

“I mean I do but its it just it...I don’t know. This is stupid. I’m stupid. I don’t know why I agreed to this tutoring bullshit. I don’t need help.”

You hastily get up and leave feeling as if you just made a fool of yourself 

You walk into your apartment with fresh clay you just got from your class and go into your safe place

Your home pottery room

Preparing your space and getting everything ready you press play on your music, wet your hands, and start moulding the clay 

You’re pretty deep into what you’re doing to the point where you don’t hear the banging on your door 

Once you do it startles you and you almost mess up your creation 

You wash your hands and go to answer the door to see Taeyong 

He’s staring at you like something is wrong and you look down to see that you’re covered in both dry and wet clay 

“What do you want?”

“I’m here to ask why you walked out like that.” He says with a pretty serious look on his face 

“I already said it. I don’t need help, I can pass the class on my own.” 

He holds up your most recent test only to spread his fingers out and it's every test you've taken and you either failed it or were pretty close, “Does this look like you don’t need help.”

“You can’t help someone stupid Taeyong.”

With annoyance splayed on his face he steps into the apartment and sits his stuff on the couch

“Why do you think that?”

“Cause I am, now can you please leave I was doing something.”

He refuses to leave until you explain to him 

You think ‘Fuck It’ and you start to tell him 

You major in ceramics but there’s a special love for pottery 

It helps to calm your mind...you love it..you’re amazing at it  

But that was never enough for your parents who ridiculed and criticized you every chance they got 

You have both dyslexia and dyscalculia 

Your parents who were both renowned scientists couldn't believe they managed to birth a stupid baby 

The only way you were able to get into university was because of ceramics but your parents didn't care

To them you were still dumb no matter what

“So that’s why I’m stupid. There’s no use in trying to teach me, you would be wasting your time”

You looked to Taeyong thinking you would see a disgusted face but you only saw one of sympathy and determination

“I’ve taught someone with dyslexia before but not dyscalculia. I will not leave you behind because y/n you’re not stupid. Regardless of what your parents and others have told you.”

After that you didn't see him for a few days and then one night when you were about to head to bed 

BAMM 

There he was at your door looking like a lunatic 

“I’ve got it.”

After that you and TaeTae(that’s what you call him now) spent every Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and sometimes Sunday together

And to say that spending that much time together didn’t have an affect on how you felt about each other would be a fucking lie 

Soon you started to anticipate the days you got to study with him or the time you two would pass each other in the halls 

It would make you feel giddy inside 

Like you were in a shaken up pop can and when you would see him you would combust

But would you ever tell him that. Fuck No  

Sometimes the studying would either take place at his or your apartment 

To say that after study sessions you wouldn’t sit and watch movies the rest of the night and slick(not slick) cuddle would also be a lie 

It’s to the point where you have clothes at each other’s house

You also may or may not have a key to each other’s apartment

Even though you both still irked the fuck out of each other sometimes this tutor and tutoree realtionship had transformed into somethin beautiful

It was getting close to your next Chemistry exam and you were stressing 

Soon enough you had two days to go and you were TERRIFIED 

Taeyong kept trying to tell you that you were gonna do fine but you didn’t believe him 

Your fears were coming back full force 

You had been doing good turning in little side assignments with no problem but this is your first test since tutoring and 

You really didn’t wanna let TaeTae down

“You won’t let me down. I promise”

“You don’t know that. Like I don’t know, I can know everything on there but when it’s in front of my face I just….blank and everything gets jumbled and I get confused and I just give up.”

“Look if you take the test and pass...I have a surprise for you, ok?”

“What surprise?” 

He just gets up and walks out of the apartment

It’s like the two days just flew by and next thing you know the test is right in front of you and you’re looking at it and 

YOU UNDERSTAND 

Even though you’re one of the last to finish you probably feel the most confident 

When you and Tae meet up the day after you guys are chillin in his apartment eating the food you just got delivered 

“Sooo since I'm close with our Chemistry teacher she let me see the grades before she put them out.”

“Really??!! What’d I make?”

“I’m sorry to tell you this…”

Taeyong was gonna pull a trick on you but seeing your face fall and the tears build up he couldn’t go through with it 

“Noo I’m just playing please don’t cry. You passed, you passed I promise.”

When you hear those words you immediately start to beat his ass..literally you start to spank him 

“Why would you do that to me. Do you know how sad I got, I almost cried!!”

He kept trying to apologize but you kept hitting him so he did something to stop you

He kissed you 

The feeling of Taeyong’s lips on yours was euphoric 

Even with the taste of the takeout on his lips his kiss was still intoxicating 

Luckily he pulled back before you could slip too far 

You unknowingly chased after his lips after he pulled away, wanting more

“I didn’t plan on saying it this way but yea that was the surprise. I like you y/n. I like you a lot.”

You took a good look at Taeyong’s face to see an unnoticeable blush spread across his cheeks

Que the Fangirl 

“AHHH you’re so cuteeee. I can finally say that now without feeling like I’ll make things awkward.”

Also que confused Tae 

“Wait so you like me too?”

Uhh duh 

So I was gonna stop here butttttt Why don’t I give yall a lil more fluff shall we 

Immediately start dating after the confession 

Istg you guys are the cutests little shits ever 

It’s disgusting 

Study dates [check]

Cuddle buddies[check] 

Hella pottery dates[FUCKIN CHECK]

You and Tae already stay up all hours of the damn night so why not teach him how to mould a little 

“Oooo are you gonna do the little backhug hand guiding thing they do in the movies.”*insert winky face* 

You do the making he does the designing 

Did I mention that he’s a fashion design major 

Him and his best friend Johnny revamp your entire wardrobe because and I quote ‘As the top fashion design student I will not be caught dead letting my girlfriend walk around looking anything less than Fabulous’ and ‘Who says you’re the top student but anyways you didn’t pass Johnny’s Fashion Evaluation...not my problem’

Oh and better believe he has the couples outfits on LOCK

“This passes the Evaluation”

He makes little cup holders and coasters for the cups you make

For your first christmas together Tae makes you a ceramic necklace with the date you guys started dating thanks to the help from your best friend Yuta who specializes in metal ceramics 

You knit him a scarf out of you guys favorite colors 

The blush you made cross his face when you wrapped it around his neck and used it to pull him into a kiss was totally worth the plenty times you caught a hand cramp trying to make that scarf 

“We’re under the mistletoe.” *insert smirky y/n*

AHHHH I can’t deal 

But yea that’s it for you and TaeTae’s relationship 

[foolishlovebugbaby]

stupid cupid | part 1

part 2 | part 3 | part 4

college!au / bang chan x fem!reader

Summary: bang chan is always complaining about being single since birth, so best friend reader decides to play cupid and sets him up. big mistake.

Genre: angst-y?? with some fluff later on idk you decide (a Lot of slow burn so idk how many parts this multi-shot will have lmao)

Warnings: none

college life, to summarise, was hectic.

multiple deadlines for multiple classes; pages upon pages of assignments and essays that needed to be done; hour long lectures almost every single day, and on top of all of that, a part-time job as a book clerk at the library that needed to be held down in order to help pay for your apartment rent.

needless to say, your days were filled with so much to do encapsulated in such little time.

thankfully, you were not alone.

you had your best friend Chan to hold you down through it all even though he had just as much struggles as you did

you had met him right before you started college on a website while looking for housemates in order to afford rent (you were drowning in student loans and so was he, so to you it was a match made in heaven)

to say your parents were reluctant to let you live with a male was an understatement- but after meeting him and realizing that he was a total sweetheart that couldn’t hurt a fly and that there was no other option, off you went. 

you two were very similar in many ways; for one, you both shared a deep love for movies and films and star wars, which is why you both made a childish pinky promise to always have movie nights on wednesday evenings and the tradition hasn’t been broken since

another thing you also shared in common was the fact that you both were completely, utterly, stupidly and perfectly single.

he, since birth, and you since the 11th grade when your first love became your fist ( and, thus, worst) heartbreak

bonding over these things and the fact that you both were endlessly passionate about reaching your goals allowed you both to develop a deep and meaningful friendship, enough to make you both realise that you were each others’ best friends

whenever he’d stay up and pull all-nighters to get his work done, you were always next to him on the dining table doing the same even though you didn’t need to, but wanted to keep him company just so that he didn’t feel alone.

and whenever you had mental breakdowns during exam season, he was always there with ice cream and flash cards in hand to help you get through it all

needless to say, even though the first two years of college were anything but a breeze, chan always made you feel okay.

so now there you two were, third year college students on your run-down, second-hand couch, watching re-runs of the big bang theory and catching up on how the week was so far.

“it makes me feel so lonely watching minho and his girl act all cutesy in class, i feel like the ultimate third wheel.” chan whined next to you on the couch and you rolled your eyes

“you’ve been complaining for so long about how you feel oh so lonely, why don’t you just find someone then? there are enough people all over campus pining over you anyway.” you said, scoffing at the brunette.

chan had been complaining for so long about how he felt like a deprived lovebug and how he was an utter virgin in everything that had to do with love, and you were getting annoyed with how often he complained

“but that’s the thing- i don’t even know where to start! how do you even approach people? how do you even know whether that person is a nice person? god, they should teach us ‘finding a life partner 101′ instead of the laws of thermodynamics, it’d be way more useful.” he rambled on

“you’re so whiny channie. you know what? let me help you. i can set you up on a blind date with someone who i think you’d like so that the filtering process would be shortened- how does that sound?” you turned to look at him, propping your elbow onto the  couch headboard and rested your head into the palm of your hand

suggesting this was your first mistake.

he looked at you quizzically, his thick eyebrows furrowed and eyes squinty

“you would do that? for me?”

“if it gets you to shut up then of course.” you grinned sarcastically and giggled, with him rolling his eyes at you

“oh haha,” he said and stuck his tongue out “forget i even said anything.” he huffed and got all pouty and exaggerated by crossing his arms and looking away from you. you could only laugh at his feigned hurtful expressions

“i’m kidding! you know i’m just joking- oh stop pouting you big baby.” you said, grabbing ahold of his bicep to get his to turn and look at you

his very muscular bicep

“i’m being serious okay! i want to set you up with someone so that my poor channie stops feeling so lonely all the time.” you mimicked his pout and patted his head

“alright, fine. i’m trusting you with this. if i get dumped i’m blaming you.”

“deal.”

you didn’t have to blink twice to agree to this whole ordeal or even to suggest it; you and chan were just friends- best friends at that, and everything between you both was completely platonic

or so you thought.

so there you were, in your literature lecture, spying on the one girl you thought would be the perfect fit to chan’s empty heart.

so far you knew that her name was Hana, that she was a screenplay major (and so, obviously, knew a good lot about film), that she was recently single and ready to mingle (according to people around campus), and that she looked absolutely gorgeous

jackpot

being your outgoing self, you immediately approached her all wide-eyed and hopeful.

“hi, you don’t know me but would you mind going on a blind date with my friend?” you quipped innocently

she looked completely shocked and dumbfounded

afterall, the only thing she knew about you was that you shared literature class together- and that’s about it.

reader you complete weirdo

“uhm, may i ask what your name is?” she said, looking bashful and flustered

“i’m y/n. and don’t worry, chan isn’t a complete weirdo- shit did i just say his name?? fuck i just took out the point of a blind date.” you mentally slapped yourself for being this much of a dumbass, but to your surprise, hana’s eyes flickered with interest.

“do you mean bang chan? as in cute-boy-in-the-physics-department bang chan?” 

“uh yeah i think so? cute boy? since when was channie known as cute bo-”

“i’m definitely in! i’m sorry for sounding so overly-enthusiastic, it’s just chan’s been quite popular these days, and i’m just a little excited.” she said bashfully

“don’t be sorry! just give me your number and i’ll text you the details soon!”

to say that chan was excited when you told him would be an understatement

“you’re going to love her, channie! god, i’m such a good wingman, you should pay me for setting you up this good.” you said, smirking, feeling proud of yourself

“don’t get too cocky just yet. but oh my god, i can’t wait to meet her!” he said grinning, completely over the moon, and your smile matched his.

wednesday evening rolled around, the day of their blind date, and you couldn’t have been more excited for him. you had arranged for them to meet at a cute little trendy café downtown- perfect for a first date- where they could just talk and get to know each other.

you honestly felt like a proud mom sending off her son to get married, and the happiness you felt for him was genuine- no if’s, and’s or but’s.

“do i look okay?” chan said, coming out of his room dressed in black jeans with rips in the knees, a black muscle tank top and his white denim jacket. he wore an expression of nervousness- a very cute one, at that- and you couldn’t help but let your gaze linger a little longer than normal with a little more affection than you’d like to admit.

“you- you look great channie!” you said, stuttering at first as you were taken aback by just how attractive he looked

you always knew your best friend was handsome- but something about the way his ruffled hair settled on his head and how his lips were flushed a deep red from biting them out of nervousness made your heart skip a beat

but of course, you ignored it.

this was the second mistake.

he was attractive, and that was that.

“you really think so?” he smiled bashfully, ears going red when he saw how your eyes gleamed after seeing him. it made him feel fluttery and giddy to have you compliment him.

“you look really handsome, channie- i mean it.” you said again, a soft smile dancing on your lips and he looked down and scratched the nape of his neck, suddenly feeling embarrassed by all the attention you were giving him.

“you should wear that really nice perfume you own!” you said giddily

“already am! i know it’s your favorite scent- i just hope she likes it too.” 

after a few more minutes of chan’s nervous questions and you telling him to calm down, he was off.

he didn’t know what Hana looked like- all you told him was that she would be sitting alone next to the window in a pink top.

so when he laid eyes on the girl you described, he had to do a double take to make sure he wasn’t seeing things.

she was a sight to see, that was for sure.

before he entered, he sent a text to you 

to stardust: u didnt tell me you were setting me up w a fukn model

from stardust: oopsies (✿◠‿◠)

he chuckled and rolled his eyes before entering the café and making his way over to her.

he introduced himself, as did she, and the night played on.

meanwhile, on the other side of town, there you were on the dining table, finishing up your last analytical essay on whatever the heck you had to analyse for your creative writing class

it was ten pm now, and you groggily made your way onto your sofa with your fluffy throw blanket wrapped around you like a burrito 

you flicked through the channels on the tv, being unable to find anything remotely interesting, until you realised something

it was wednesday.

movie night day.

and you were alone.

you felt a pang in your chest at that realisation. after 2 years of almost always spending wednesday nights with chan by your side, you suddenly grew increasingly aware of how lonely you were. by now you two would be cramped on the couch, debating over whether or not to put on a new movie or series or to re-watch some of your all-time favorites.

but there you were, staring into space, alone and cold on your couch, chan no longer beside you.

you immediately buried those thoughts away 

‘he’s happy and having a good time, and i’m so happy for him- he’s my best friend.’ you thought to yourself

your phone dinged, interrupting your train of thought

from solo: this is going too well, im buying u sushi next week to thank u

you let out a breathy laugh at that

to solo: hehe glad to hear that

from solo: gosh i love you

your breath hitched in your throat when you read that message. it made your heart suddenly pick up speed and made your tummy feel weird. he’s never said that before, you thought to yourself, your mind malfunctioning. you blinked yourself back into reality.

to solo: i know.

with that, you shut off your phone. 

you had to remind yourself why he said it. 

he was being thankful, nothing more. that’s all there is to it. 

i’m his best friend, nothing more. that’s all there is to it.

you had to shake of the stinging feeling in your chest and chose to distract yourself by watching the nature documentary that was playing on tv, even though it bored you out of your mind and caused you to just stare at it blankly for the rest of the night. 

soon enough you fell asleep on the couch, alone and cold, with the tv playing a show you didn’t like on a channel you didn’t watch with a dull pain brewing in the middle of your chest that you chose to actively ignore. 

and that was the third mistake. 

i’ll just end it here for part one. please reblog and like so i know you want this multi-shot to continue! also all my star wars babies- peep those references heheheheheheh 

[theycallmemoosey]

Financial Struggles

Dan x Reader 

A/N: This was written as a request, in which I am sorry for the very, very long wait and the completely sidetracked response to your request. It doesn't follow the request exactly, in which I really, really am sorry about. I'm also sorry for the bad quality of it, but I really did try. Also, a general apology for not uploading recently, just been bombarded with huge levels of stress from exams and home things etc. Please do keep sending in requests, however, as I really do enjoy receiving them. Moose :) 

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You sighed as you opened the door to the apartment, tripping over the numerous pairs of shoes across the floor. You shut the door quietly, unsure if the boys were filming or not. You threw your apron on the floor carelessly, sliding your shoes off next to them, not caring that they were in the middle of the hallway. You took out your ponytail as you headed towards the “gaming channel” room. You smiled as you could hear the boys shouting at each other, laughing. You pushed the door open slightly, peeking through to see what game they were playing. A horror game. The lights were off, apart from the few torches they neatly placed to light their faces enough for the camera to pick them up. You debated with yourself whether or not to jump scare them, or even knock on the door to let them know that you were home, but you decided against it. Instead, you hauled your tired body to the living room and slumped across the sofa, groaning as your face planted inside the sofa’s cushions. Not looking up, your hand searched for Dan’s laptop you spotted on the arm of the sofa just before. You finally managed to grab it and pull it towards you, shifting into Dan’s spot on the sofa as you opened the lid, logging in to your account Dan had specially made for you. Opening up your emails, you groaned loudly as 30 emails from your college popped up. You loved college, you really did, but it was so stressful. And expensive. You were working three jobs at once to pay it off, considering your parents refused to pay for you. Dan and Phil had offered to help, but you assured them that you weren’t struggling. You lied. 

“You’re in my spot...” You looked up and were met with two gorgeous brown eyes staring down at you, his smile wide and his dimples showing. “And?” “And that’s my laptop...” “I really don’t care tonight” You heard Dan sigh and sit down next to you, feeling his head rest on your shoulder. “What game were you playing?” “Slenderman” “Dude, that’s old” “I know...it’s what the fans wanted” You hummed and pressed a kiss to his head. You felt his head tilt up slightly, knowing he was looking at the screen. “Why so many?” “Emails?” “Mmhm” You sighed, “I’m not sure...college is just...college” Dan hummed and watched you tap away as your replied to emails. “How was work?” “Stressful” “What happened?” “Just stressful customers. Didn’t help I was pretty much the only active waitress there. Jenna was also on duty?” “Is that the slut one?” “Yeah. Spent all night flirting with the new chef. Straight out of culinary school. So of course, she was occupied for the entire shift. Oh, and did I mention a party of 30 was booked in tonight? I had to deal with the entire restaurant on my own...” “Oh, love...” “Shit.” “What? Everything ok?” Dan asked, sitting up and scanning the screen along with you. “Apparently I have an essay due in tomorrow...I didn’t know about it” “What is it?” “Something about the establishment of the American constitution...I’ll have to call Ben and ask him” “Love, it’s nearly midnight, will he even be awake?” “He’s an insomniac” you retorted, scrolling through your contact list in your phone. “Come find me when your done” Dan kissed your cheek and headed towards the bedroom, leaving you alone once again. Once you were sure Dan was unable to hear, you called the restaurant once again. “Hey, Susan? Hi...I was actually just calling you to let you know that I’m not going to be able to make it in to work tomorrow, my college is making me go in because my attendance record isn’t great. You know, working three jobs and all...cool. Thank you. See you Friday” You sighed, throwing your phone across the sofa, rubbing your head in stress before starting to slowly type on the keyboard.

Dan woke up, feeling a small body curl up behind him, a cold sensation of your feet on his legs. He looked up to the alarm clock at his table, “5am? Seriously, Y/N?” “Long essay...” Dan sighed and rolled over, engulfing you in a bear hug, tracing his fingers along your arm. “What time do you have to be in college tomorrow?” “Afternoon-ish. I need to go to work in the morning...” “Which one?” “The one I hate...” Dan chuckled, “restaurant?” “Guess again” “Care Home?” “Nope” “Oh, love...the nursery?” “Ding ding ding” you sleepily chanted, “noisy ass toddlers who shit, vomit and cry all morning, followed by several lectures in the afternoon and the cafe in the evening” “Y/N, why do you do this to yourself?” “Experience? Good on my CV?” Dan sighed, and you felt his breath down your neck, making you shiver and curl up deeper into him. “You sure it’s not because you’re struggling to pay for college?” “No, no, Dan. I’m doing ok. Promise” you squeezed his hand as your alarm began to go off. “What?!” Dan slammed his hands on the duvet, clearly frustrated. “Well...that’s my cue to start getting ready...” “No...” Dan wrapped his arms around you as you began climbing out of bed, pulling you back in and holding you with a tight grip, “you’re not going. You just got in” “Dan, come on...” “NO” “Shhh, you’ll wake Phil” you slapped his arm gently, squirming out of his grip successfully. “You’re killing yourself, Y/N!!” “Go back to sleep, Dan” “Not until you tell me why the hell you’re doing this to yourself! Jesus, Y/N, you don’t even enjoy your jobs!” “Dan! Stop it! I’ve had enough of you-“ You were interrupted by three knocks at the door. “Now look what you’ve done” you hissed at Dan, opening the door to a sleepy eyed Phil. “Why are you guys arguing at this time in the morning?” “I have to go to work, but Dan’s not letting me” “You need to go to work at 5 in the morning?” “Nursery...” “Oh. Well...can you guys just keep it down?” “Yeah. Sorry, Phil” you smiled apologetically at him before closing the door, hearing his footsteps plod down the hall quietly. Dan sighed and rolled over, putting his back to you. You chose to ignore him and continued getting ready. “I’ll see you later” you said quietly as you were about to leave the room, hearing nothing but a grunt back.

“Y/N!” You turned around, spotting the principal of the college down the hallway. “Mr. King?” “I need a meeting with you in my office. Follow me, please” “Sir, I need to head to my next period, my attendance hasn’t exactly been great...” “I know. I’ve emailed your professor. With me” You followed Mr. King to his office, unable to sit comfortably as he sat down in his chair, staring at you. “Y/N, it has come to my attention that your previous five due payments have not been...well, paid. And this doesn’t bode well with your attendance record” “Sir, I’m sorry. My pay check from work hasn’t come in yet but when it does I promise, I will transfer it straight to the finance department. I will do my best to get it paid by the end of this month” “Y/N, with the amount of money you’re not paying, you’re getting a free education here. And you’re already on a scholarship. If this doesn’t improve, I will have no option than to pull you from your course and discontinue your studies until you are able to afford to come here again” “What? What?! No! Please!” “Y/N-“ “Mr. King! This is...this college course...I’ve wanted to study here for years. I’m sorry about my attendance but I’m currently working three jobs to try and pay off the finances...” “Three jobs?” “Yes, Sir” “Well unfortunately, it’s clearly not working...so I’m afraid you’ll either need to improve your attendance so we can try and help your financial situation or you find a way to pay off your debt and to pay off future payments, and we can rule out removing you from the college until you are able to afford it. Is that clear, Y/N?” “Sir...” “Those are your only options, Y/N...find a solution, or we will” “Yes, Sir” you sighed, feeling the tears well up in your eyes. “Head back to class, Y/N” “Thank you, Sir...”

“Phil, have you heard from Y/N at all? I think she must still be mad at me...” “No I haven’t. Unusual of her, to be honest” “I know” The two of them turned their heads towards the sound of the front door opening. “Speak of the devil” Phil laughed, going back to the computer to continue editing the video they had just filmed. “Y/N?” Dan called out as he headed down the hallways to the door. He stopped in his tracks when he heard you sniffle. “Y/N? Is everything ok?” You didn’t respond to him, continuing hanging your coat up and placing your bag on the floor by the door. “Y/N?! Don’t ignore me...” Dan walked up to you, grabbing you to stop you from pushing past, “look at me...” You hesitantly looked up at him, Dan noticing the tears run down your face. “Hey...hey, what’s up?” Dan’s voice softened, rubbing his hands up and down your arms. “It’s all getting too much, Dan. I can’t do it anymore...I can’t work three jobs and go to college. I can’t pay off the debt, even while working all the time. I can’t find the time to do the essays and assignments and the toddlers and the elderlies and the rude customers and-“ “Hey! Shhh...shhh” he pulled you in close to him, wrapping his arms tightly around you, “Y/N, you know Phil and I are happy to help you pay for your college. You don’t have to work three jobs, we’ll help!” “Dan, I can’t rely on you two to pay for my college tuition...you work so hard for the money you earn” you sniffled as you snuggled closer into him. Dan scoffed, squeezing you as he laughed, “we work hard? We don’t work three jobs! We don’t go to college and work our asses off trying to learn the most complicated thing in the world! We muck about for the work and then spend the evening with our favourite girl eating crap and playing games! At least we enjoy our jobs” “That’s true...” “Y/N, I’ve had it. We’re gonna help you ok? You’re gonna quit those jobs and you’re going to focus on what you love doing the most. Going to college everyday and then coming home and chilling out. I’m not going to argue with you about this, it’s not optional and you are not going to do anything about it. Phil and I will help you. Understood?” “Dan...” “IS THAT UNDERSTOOD LITTLE MISS STUBBORN?” Dan jokingly shouted in a stern voice, making you chuckle “I love you” you smiled, wiping away the tears and hugging him tightly. “I know. Come on, I’ve just ordered a pizza. Let’s go beat Phil at Mario Kart” Dan said, pulling away and holding out his hand to you. “Dan?” You asked quietly as you followed him hand in hand down the hallway. “Y/N?” “You ordered ice cream with the pizza, right?” “What? You think I’m made of money?!” “Not funny...” “Was a little” Dan giggled, “there’s ice cream in the freezer. Ben and Jerry’s, of course. But...” “But what?” “First one to the freezer gets it all!” Dan shouted as he began to sprint towards the freezer, leaving you stood there laughing. You smiled to yourself, “God, I love you”

[hansolmates]

vernon; get lost in the rhythm of me

Summary: She had less than a month to finish a project she should’ve finished ages ago, and on a whim decides to interview the campus radio show. Little did she know she’d get locked into the Thursday Night Lockdown with a certain campus cutie. Wow I’m sorry I suck at summaries please send help.

Characters: fratboy!Vernon/Original Female + various

Genre: Fluffity fluff (and if you count student stress a lil wittle angst)

Word Count: 5896

01 | 02(?) | 03 (m)(?)

“There’s that dance team that covers songs, you can write about them?”

“I already checked with their e-board, they’re too busy for an interview.”

College Avenue was littered with students after the final 4:10 session, the kids excited for the week to be over as they walked around like busy ants. Despite the nippy weather, Greek Row was still going strong, so strong that we couldn’t get past the student center without hearing the cacophonous noise pollution coming from the different houses. I totally got it though, considering it was a hard week of exams for everyone. It was lucky enough for us to go to a big university where students could cry and party together. A little part of me itched to go grab a drink from one of their coolers, but I promised myself that I couldn’t have fun until I figured out my final project topic for Media Studies. The topic that I was supposed to have down over a month ago.

(Last Tuesday, 4:33:

“I’m doing a compilation on popular YouTube artists,” Joshua informed, taking a long sip of his iced Americano. .

“Ah. Should I get the small or medium?” I asked distractedly, my eyes calculating how much more content I would get in my smoothie if I got the bigger size.

“I’m almost done with my project, maybe you should start soon.” he continued, probably glaring holes into my back because I wasn’t paying the least bit attention to him.

“Do you think I should get extra bananas in my drink? How can you even tell if there’s extra bananas when it’s all mixed up?”

“And I’ve also discovered aliens are real.” Joshua drolled, unamused as he swirled the caramel in his drink. “Their mothership came to my dorm last night, and now I’m pregnant with the Queen’s future heir to the throne. So nice knowing you, I’m glad to have a friend who’s always willing to listen to me!”

Needless to say, I didn’t have my work cut out for me.)

Joshua stopped in his tracks, and by my demise I had to stop in front of him, my neck narrowly missing the sharp corner of his textbook that was sticking out of his backpack. “Did you see that?” he asked, practically pulling my arm from the socket so I’d be right in front of him.

Sigma Tau (notorious for having the prettiest pink house on Row) had a lawn practically spilling with loud students, with equally loud music drowning out their block.

On the makeshift plastic and metal stage, a guy with flowers was on one knee looking like the high heavens as his lips moved in some sort of proposal. The girl who was forcefully dragged up by her sisters looked absolutely mortified, cheeks ruddy, face sunken, and her pale limbs hugged around her t-shirt that was now way too skimpy for her comfort level. The guy was absolutely smug however, looking like he just won a trip to Mars as he practically dipped the rose petals in her palms. But everyone was watching, cooing and making eager, alcohol-laden cries of encouragement, and she had no choice to accept, her face tilted away as she reluctantly grabbed the bouquet.

“Seungcheol is so embarrassing,” Joshua muttered under his breath, pulling them away from the lawn and back onto the sidewalk, “She looks terrified up there.”

I frowned at the childish proposal, watching the couple (?) pull away from the stage and melt between the thick crowd. “I feel bad for her.” I frowned, forcing my gaze to the DJ. The rosy-haired student flipped a switch in his soundboard, and played another upbeat mix, effectively bringing the mood back to a million.

Joshua bobbed his head to the everlasting beat as they walked further away, in that cute non-party boy way that looked more like he was walking down Disney’s Main Street, U.S.A. with birds and sunshine rather than a Thirsty Thursday on campus. “Oh, I got it. What about the radio show?” he suddenly asked, his face glowing with excitement.

“Radio show? Like the campus one?”

“Yeah, there’s one for every day of the week. You can probably go tonight and see if you can snag an interview or something.”  Joshua dragged us to the pizza place by one of the main classroom buildings, the aroma of garlic buttered dough and tomato sauce notifying my empty stomach like lightning.

“The mac n’ cheese pizza looks good,” I murmured, my eyes glazing over the shiny window display.

“Are you paying attention? You should go before their show starts because we have to have our topics before class tonight and—oh shit that does look good. Let's get two slices. With garlic knots.” his large cat eyes widened at the specialty pizza, ready to pull out his wallet. “I can spot you this time.”

Nudging his shoulder with mine I giggled, “You're a lifesaver.”

I blame the food coma from that sinful pizza, because after napping in the dorms it nearly escaped my mind that I was supposed to go to the radio station after class. By napping, I mean sleeping. Missing the first campus bus, it took an extra fifteen minutes to get to the Communications Department. It looked like any other building on campus, faded brick walls which veiled a treasure cove of our student talent. The lights that led to the station upstairs were a dim deep yellow, bathing the atrium that led to a series of dark hallways.

“Excuse me,” I said, careful not to disturb the student in the lobby who was currently alphabetizing records behind their desk. “Are you, DJ Suga?”

Said boy took his sweet ass time to turn around, his glazed eyes giving me a look that wondered why on earth I was here so late. He wore a dark denim jacket with a poorly painted uterus on the back, with a very subtle wording of “fuck the patriarchy” in fine white script. “Yeah, I am.” he said, his pebbly voice wracking my form and waking up all the hairs on my arms. DJ Suga was the de facto head of the campus radio, and at best I hoped he could be a tad less irritable to my outreach. “What of it?”

“I was wondering if I could get an interview with one of your DJs? If there’s time.”

The ebony haired student tilted his head, as if he were momentarily stuck in dreamland, before pulling himself away from his desk. “Let’s see,” he hummed, more to himself as he walked down one of the dark hallways. He returned in a matter of seconds, his petite form looking absurdly high and mighty from his lazy smile, “Sorry, doll.” he murmured, jerking his head back in the hallway. “I got a kid who’s going to be on the air in a few minutes. But I think you’re better off listenin’ to their show before you get the interview, y’know? Feel their vibe.”

My eyes darted to the big digital clock that sat fat in the middle of his desk. 11:52. Wow, I slept longer than I thought. I suddenly felt a little silly, barging in so late with the faintest idea about how to go about this project. With a quick thanks, I hitched my bag above my shoulder, going across the radio floor and to one of the study lobbies. When I made sure I found a nice corner desk where no one would bother me I threw my laptop on and shoved my headphones over my ears, finding the university station. I hoped after coming all this way here in the middle of the night, I could at least try to “feel their vibe.”

Some techy music signaled the start of the show, and to my lack of anticipation the most velvety voice filled my ears, causing my chest to jerk involuntarily.

“What’s up, College Avenue. I’m Vernon and we’re back with The Thursday Night Lockdown.”

His voice was something out of the city and back, with purpose and history. It wasn’t raspy like DJ Suga’s, but it definitely had that low timbre that probably could melt people like butter if he used it right. Adjusting the volume on my laptop, I closed my eyes and let DJ Vernon have his evening.

“I hope you guys submitted those assignments. I’m tellin’ ya freshmen, that 11:59 deadline will close on your ass if you don’t press that red button.” a small smile played on my lips, and I subtly kicked my sneakers under the table, tucking my legs in a comfortable position. I’d imagine Vernon would be just as comfortable, feet on the desk, loose sweats, totally in his element. “I didn’t really have a set plan for tonight, considering it’s midterms and there was a lot of stuff to do this week. I know a lot of us are out drinking their livers out, but for the rest of us I was thinking we could all wind down together. Listen to some playlists, I’ll take some calls and talk about life.”

He talked a little bit about his first playlist, saying it was his favorite cool down mix after a hard day of classes. Everything he said rolled off his tongue like molten chocolate, and I belatedly realized that my fingers curled after every other syllable, his eagerness to spread his enjoyment seeping into my tensed muscles. When his voice faded to silence and soft acoustic music rose, I felt myself momentarily transcend in the surprisingly soothing setlist. I opened up a new tab and started working on some homework, feeling myself get in the zone as I let my mind bounce comfortably between assignments and The Thursday Night Lockdown. This was pretty cool, actually. I never made the time to listen to university shows, but this guy was a natural. Vernon made off-hand comments between songs, reading some comments from their forum page like a conversation with friends or ad-libbing on certain songs. It was a welcoming distraction on particularly rough parts of the work.

“Ah, but one thing that I really need to get off my chest today.” Vernon’s low chuckle rumbled in my ears, “I’m incredibly annoyed at what went down at Sigma Tau today. My boy Coups was brutally rejected for formal on stage this afternoon.”

Shooting up from my nylon seat, its wheels rolled farther from the desk causing my ears to tug painfully from the wire. Pulling myself back to the wooden desk, I furrowed my eyebrows as my focus blurred from my literature paper, concentrating on what Vernon had to say.

“I mean, he did so much for her, Got her flowers, played her favorite song right before he asked, and even got her sisters on it, But once she got off the stage she apparently got so angry, and walked out on him! Seriously?” he scoffed, the once enjoyable sound of his voice feeling like a grating chalkboard forced against my ears. “It was so rude of her, I hope she apologizes to him soon because no one deserves to be treated that way.”

White heat boiled my blood, my jaw pulled so low in shock that it ached. My fingers twitched with a sudden urge to rip at my textbook that I’ve left on the side for the last ten minutes, finally putting it to good use on my sanity.

“Feel free to drop some comments on the forum or shoot me a call, let me know your opinion.”

With pleasure. My fingers typed at lightspeed as I searched up the radio’s number, then with equal pace as I tapped on my cellphone with a bit of unnecessary force with each key. Pulling out one bud, I pressed my cell to my ear. The dial tone was Drake’s Fake Love, which made me even more irritated as I waited for him to pick up.

“And then I was craving—oh, we got our first phone call of the night!” A small, cruel smile nipped on the edge of my lips at Vernon’s innocence as he prepared to pick up. Ripping out the other earbud, I slammed my laptop shut, the lid echoing in the small cubicle. “Good evening, Caller 10.” Vernon sing-songed, “Welcome to The Lockdown. What’s up?”

“Hello, Vernon.” I replied with an equally cheery voice, drumming my nails against the lid of my computer. “I presume you were there when Seungcheol asked that girl to formal?”

“Oh, yeah. Of course I was there.” his voice perked up, probably eager to vent out his frustrations of this afternoon. I was equally armed.

“So I guess you’re blind, then?” I bite, my voice still laced with a sickly positivity.

I felt his breath hitch slightly, probably undetected from the rest of campus listening, but against my ear his surprise was blissfully palpable. “E-excuse me?” he said.

“Because if you had eyes, you would’ve seen how absolutely uncomfortable that poor girl looked on stage. She looked like she was about to cry.” I prayed that the girl from this afternoon wasn’t listening in, and if Seungcheol was supporting his friend like I’d imagine, I hoped he’d feel every ounce of my venom. “How dare you insinuate that girl was wrong. She doesn’t have to apologize, and in fact it’s your friend that should be apologizing.”

“Whoa whoa, hold up Ten.” I blistered at the fact he referred to me as a number, but let it slide considering it was my first time on his line and I was attacking him. “You don’t even know the whole story—”

“Oh, I don’t need to know the whole story to know that your friend is immature and delusional. And so are you, if you think some flowers and a grand confession is any consolation for a date. She had every right to say no.”

“You have no idea,” I felt his voice go dangerously low, like the way a predator would test the waters. Eliciting that sort of reaction from the originally happy Vernon, was satisfying. “How much Coups likes that girl. He would do anything—”

“Bullshit.” I spat, fingers curling around my phone. “If he really liked her, he wouldn’t have put her on the chopping block. He wouldn’t have let her stand on that damn stage, forced to say yes on the spot. She was doing your friend a favor,” I said slowly, my words careful and deliberate. “And made sure she wouldn’t embarrass him like he was embarrassing her.”

I knew Vernon was hanging on a thread, trying to be mighty and defend his friend. Despite my subconscious telling me to let this poor boy off the hook, it’s not my business and it’s his show, I couldn’t let him continue to talk as if he knew everything.

Vernon scoffed, and I could imagine him practically groveling in his studio, grappling for a comeback. “You really think he was trying to hurt her? Coups wouldn’t hurt a fly.” he said.

“Then if it’s not you or me, Seungcheol is the blind one. If you had asked me out on that stage, you better believe I wouldn’t have been as nice to you as she was.”

“Good thing that won’t happen, ever.” Vernon shot back. “I don’t think I’d want to date someone like you.”

Low. Blow. “Excuse me?” I hissed. Screw being quiet in the study room, I got up, smacking my palms against the desk as if Vernon was right in front of me. “You’d be so lucky to date someone like me—”

“Oh!” I heard some rustling, plastic, prickling against my ear. And then the call ended.

Ripping the phone away, I whipped open my laptop and turned on The Lockdown.

“The call dropped.” Vernon’s A-class acting reverberated through my speakers, his candied voice strained with concealed stress. “So, so sorry that happened, Ten.” he cooed. I was fuming, half-tempted to fling my laptop across the room if it wasn’t so expensive. “Anyway, I hope she comes to her senses. The exams must be getting to her, but on more important—”

I closed my laptop with another huff, throwing it in its case and shoving my books in my bag. Unbelievable. It was hard to get me riled, but my face was burning so hard with embarrassment and anger that my cheeks hurt. No way in hell was I letting this guy get to me. He was probably a complete idiot who didn’t deserve the satisfaction of making me angry, and was probably sweating in his studio for being such a coward and ending an argument that he was destined to lose. Throwing my jacket on, I left the study area as fast as I could. I needed food, a hot shower, and Vernon’s stupid voice to be erased from my memory.

I passed by the lobby, avoiding DJ Suga’s smirk as he lazed against his desk.

“Nice show, doll.” I heard him say to my retreating back. “You’re a natural.”

“So, I heard the radio show last night.” Joshua’s voice was like a meek puppy, molasses slow as he weighed my expressions.

“Can we not?” I sighed tiredly, taking a sharp stab into my bubble tea. My straw pierced through the tight plastic with a satisfying ‘pop’ and I gave a hard sip of my thai.

The small bubble tea shop felt even more suffocating than usual, the arylide yellow walls closing in on me through Joshua’s motherly gaze. There was nowhere to go when you’re trapped under his chocolate eyes. People who have never done a wrong thing in their life would plead guilty if Joshua was chastising them.

“Minghao’s in Sigma. He said that Vernon was practically fuming when he got back.” he informed, both of his hands clutching in his mango yogurt tea. “Apparently he doesn’t get angry often.”

“Well, I’m glad I was able to tap into his newfound emotions.” I replied tartly, looking away to focus on the black framed window. The sky was a dull blue-grey, signaling the end of another day. Clouds blanketed the campus, fat and eager for a reprieve. “Josh, can you please stop looking at me like that? I did nothing wrong. I only spoke my mind, or is that against your moral code?”

“It’s not.” Joshua huffed. “But you messed up your final project by picking a fight with him. You don’t have much time.”

“It’s fine. I’ll ask Suga for help. He found my little stunt entertaining.”

“His show is about underground rap. What on earth do you know about underground rap?”

“Okay, what about Woozi?”

“Not after what happened last night. Vernon and Jihoon are friends, no way is he going to help you.”

“Alright, Grapevine.” I looked up at him through my lashes. “I was impulsive. What do you want me to do, apologize for telling the truth?”

“Stop attacking me. I'm just saying for the sake of your grade, you should try making peace with him.” Joshua took an obnoxious sip of his tea, emptying his plastic cup with a loud slurp. “You already declared radio as your topic, right?”

“Yeah, yeah.” I glowered, shifting in my uncomfortable metal stool. “I’ll figure something out, don’t worry.”

Seemingly satisfied, Joshua threw away his finished drink and put on his backpack. A little part of me envied how put-together my friend always was, the perfect poster student in a baby blue button down and Dockers oxfords. He gave me a pleased smile and waved to the owner, pulling out his portable umbrella. “I gotta go to glee club, but think about what I said alright?” he patted my head, mussing up my hair. Before I could growl in his face he was already out the door, waving cheerfully.

Once he was out of sight, I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding in. Feeling a whole lot more heavier and weighed with the whole world against me, I slumped in my chair and leaned over my laptop. Ordering another round of tea, I vegetated in that little hole-in-the-wall shop all evening. Mulling over my unfinished radio project, the layers and upon layers of other subjects I had to handle, and to my bitter acknowledgement, The Lockdown. Had I made a mistake, lashing on a fellow student when I really did have no clue what was going on? I only said what I saw, and while I wasn't going to take it back a little part of me felt guilty for putting that guy on the spot.

It was already past ten when I finally decided to go home. Popping my joints in all the right places I packed up my things, bumping into other customers who were trying to get something to drink before the shop closed. Bubbling myself to repel the happy students lazing around the sweet smelling shop, I walked outside where the rain was at its peak.

Thunder popped across the sky, and I flinched, clutching the straps of my bag tighter around my shoulders. I didn’t have an umbrella and my windbreaker definitely wasn’t large enough to protect myself and my laptop. Water droplets bounced like millions of tiny scintillating diamonds across the sidewalk, and I had to take half a step under the canopy to stay dry.

“The rain isn’t going to stop anytime soon, but a little water never hurt anybody.”

That voice. The pops in the sky, the lightning streaking across the midnight blue sky suddenly made a race into my chest, electrifying me and rooting me to the spot. An umbrella was suddenly draped over my head, the inner lining decorated with pearl white clouds and a clear azure sky. I looked up to the speaker of that insultingly attractive voice, and it belonged to DJ Vernon of The Thursday Night Lockdown.

There were a number of things that confused me on a daily basis. The people who order iced water at Starbucks, or why the detergent pods couldn’t be used in the laundry rooms because they were so damn convenient. But today it was Vernon, I couldn’t fathom why I couldn’t look at him and get mad like I did last night. It was like he was a completely different person, the way he smiled like he was the sunshine steering away tonight’s rainfall.

He was cute. Really cute. I felt trapped under his aura, which felt tons warmer than the cold rainy night. Eyes like caramel coffee, both energizing and sweet. A smile so disarming I was struck as much as the lightning to a tree, a little part of me felt like he was being betrayed because I didn’t deserve such niceties.

“Uh, are you okay?” his smile quirked in confusion, and I realized he probably felt really uncomfortable that I was staring up at him like he was some beacon in a fog. He tilted his head, the dark bangs shifting slightly in his neon orange beanie. One hand held the handle of the umbrella, the other with a large strawberry yogurt boba. If I moved a centimeter closer I would surely be bumping into his arm. As fate would play dirty tricks in life, it was inevitable that I would end up meeting him the night after I called him out.

Feeling like cotton was being shoved in my throat, I said quietly, “Hey, Vernon.”

And I couldn’t comprehend the sinking feeling in my stomach when his face fell slightly at my words, recognizing my voice just as quickly as I had. “Oh, Ten.” he said with a sort of glazed wonder, his umbrella dipping slightly to let the water dribble off the edge. “You look, a lot less scarier than I imagined you to be.”

“Scarier?” I gaped, wondering exactly how angry I made this guy.

“Yeah. When you’re not talking, of course.” his voice was devoid of any distinguishable emotion, blending with his barely there smile and off-putting gaze. “You look, kind of sweet actually. But unfortunately for you, looks are deceiving.” he deadpanned simply.

And he dropped me like a bowling ball, pulling away from me and walking into the rain.

My eyes followed his quickly retreating trail, looking about as dry as a sheet of paper as he walked into the street. I swallowed back a sigh, half-expecting Vernon to walk away upon discovering I was Caller 10. He had every right to leave me stranded, but it felt even crappier watching him walk off in the rain. I looked up into the suffocating sky, the dark clouds giving me no hope of getting back to the dorms without being drenched. Maybe if I stared hard enough, the rain would stop. Maybe I could do a raindance, at this point dignity was non-existent.

The tic-tic of rain suddenly turned into harsh splashes, and I looked straight to find Vernon retreating his footsteps and making his way back to me. If he noticed his Timberlands drowning by the neck in grimy water, he made no notice. He looked like he was talking to himself, his cheeks glowing pink in the midst of the grey city as he quickly pushed himself back to the front of the store. My heart rate seemed to multiply in double time the closer he got, and I fought the urge to go back inside the warm shop and avoid him altogether.

“Okay, shit. I’m not that much of a dick.” he looked guilty, biting his bubble gum toned lips. There it was again with the eyes, I thought in frustration as he stared in the remnants of my soul. They reminded me a little of Joshua’s, they way he’d stare and be completely willing to share the world. Vernon placed the umbrella over both of our heads. “I’m not gonna let you walk in the rain alone. Are you heading to the bus stop?”

“Yeah.” I said quietly, still surprised he actually came back for me. What exactly was this guy?

“Cool. C’mon then.”

I followed his footsteps, doing my best to match his long legs which were covered by a light pair of cuffed jeans. I don’t even know what I was thinking, walking with the guy I practically trashed on the night before. He didn’t seem to know what he was doing either, his Adam’s apple bobbing nervously as he walked to the stoplight. It seemed more like his morality was forcing him to be generous to me, and it was only more aching on my conscious knowing he was being nice to someone who probably didn’t deserve it.

“Wow,” I murmured against the thick rain, soft enough for only the two of us to hear. “You’re really nice.”

A small grin tugged on Vernon’s lips as we rounded the corner. He refused to look at me, his gaze dead straight on our destination. “Why, did you think I was some evil radio host?”

“No.” I snorted, “Believe it or not I actually thought you were pretty nice back then, too. Anyone who’d stand to defend their friend no matter how bad they messed up, is a pretty good guy in my books.”

He didn’t reply after that, and I didn’t mind. He probably thought I was tricking him or something. We stood in front of the bus stop next to the other late-stragglers, waiting for the next bus to take us back.

I tried not to notice the wary look he gave me, not because I looked threatening, but because I was pretty far from him. As big as his umbrella was, I kept edging away from the center to give him his personal space. My left shoulder was exposed, water spilling on the wicker fabric of my windbreaker. I did my best to ignore the subtle way Vernon would try to cover it.

“Your show is nice.” I continued to fill the lack of conversation, might as well while we waited it out. “It was my first time listening to it. I thought it was great, I like your music taste and you really sound like you’re enjoying it. I was actually supposed to write about your show for a project. Still am, actually.” I added with a little bit of remorse, willing for the bus to come faster. “It’s too late to change my topic, but I’ll figure my way around.” The familiar red and white bus turned into the stop, and I shied away from Vernon’s space, finally looking at him with as much sincerity as I could muster. “Thanks for waiting.”

And as I climbed on the bus, Vernon finally spoke.

“Turns out the girl broke into tears after. Coups really fucked up.”

My head snapped to him in surprise, Vernon still rooted on the spot. While I didn’t want to be right, knowing I was made the situation feel a lot more real. Our fight wasn't in vain. I didn't understand why Vernon felt the need to tell me that, so I bit my lip and replied, “I'm sorry to hear that happened.”

“You were right about Seungcheol. I talked to him today.” he looked up through his lashes with nothing but pure guilt, “While I’m still angry for you talking trash about my friend, I’m sorry I was quick to judge.”

Before I could even let his words sink in, the glass doors barriered us, and the buss whirred back to life. I gripped on the handle of the railing, watching Vernon wait for his bus as mine drove away. Vernon certainly was a character, I couldn’t even tell if he liked me or hated me. But he said sorry, and it wasn’t even his fault, and that only fueled the aching guilt inside me that would haunt me for the following week.

The next Thursday felt more like a Monday, the most painful Monday-Thursday in my entire college career. There was just so much work. I felt like I was drowning in it. Drowning in sleepless nights, drowning in coffee and all the various types of teas in the hope to keep myself conscious for even five seconds. I couldn’t retain any information my professors were giving me. My projects were crap, my life was a mess, and I could hardly breathe.

So that’s how I ended up in my dormitory’s laundry room at 3 A.M., curled up against the washing machine. My laptop was strewn across my slippers, my headphones connected to them and wound over my ears.

I’m sure it was normal for students to have their obligatory breakdown midway through the semester. When everything feels like it’s crashing down on you and you have no idea how to get up. I pressed my back further into the rumbling washing machine, the cool metal burning through my thin pajamas. I turned my music up up up, all the way to max volume until I couldn’t hear myself tear.

Crying’s a good thing, I tell myself.

It’d be even worse to let myself bottle up and explode in the worst possible way. I wasn’t even entirely sure as to what I was crying about, all I knew was that I was sad and I needed to let it out. Was it the piles of work? The fact that I missed home? My subpar projects? My shoulders shook like a chilled autumn leaf, brittle and vulnerable, my throat constricting and my face puffy and wet with stress.

I wasn’t exactly sure how long I was crying for, but I remember hearing the music breaking to a MultiVitamin commercial, forcing me to change the station on my computer.

“We’re at the last hour of The Lockdown.” Vernon’s voice purred in my ears, willing me to lift my shoulders up a centimeter.  

I exhaled tiredly, wiping away the tears that still wouldn’t cease their race down my face. My fixation to his radio show since that time in the rain definitely wasn't healthy, it was one of the main things distracting me from my studies. Although I would like to convince myself it was because of my Media Studies project, and not a certain beanie-wearing DJ.

“I'm not exactly sure how many of you are up with me, but if you are—that's lit!” I suppressed the small smile at his infectious enthusiasm.  “Because now you get to listen to a little something I whipped up with Sigma last month. It still needs a little bit of work, but you’ll like it either way.”

Vernon wrote music?

“This is for everyone who's going through a hard time right now. That you'll always have someone to lean on.

If I am in your heart If I am really in your heart Wherever you are I will follow you Even if we’re so busy That we can’t see each other often If we get drunk on each other and fall asleep In the dreams, don’t hesitate Lean on me.”

When he started rapping, I realized there was way more to radio than I thought. Way more on the inside to the puzzle that was Vernon. At the time, the one thing that I was absolutely sure of was that I seriously underestimated him. There was so much passion in his words, the messages he wanted to share, his declaration was nothing more than genuine. It only caused my emotional self to get even worse, tears bubbling down my face like water boiling over.

As soon as he finished his song I pulled out my phone, and tugged off the plug of the speaker. Vernon’s bashful self started explaining the origins of his song, the speakers echoing throughout the cramped laundry room. Pressing my cell to my ear, I waited to the all-too familiar dial tone of “Hotline Bling.”

“Oh. We have a caller! I didn’t think anyone would be awake.” he chuckled awkwardly, and I wondered what he thought about his rapping if he only decided to sing when virtually no one would be listening. “Welcome to The Lockdown… Ten?”

Surprise, surprise. “Hey, Vernon.” I sniffed, trying my hardest not to whimper according to  my weary throat.

“Are you, are you crying?” there was disbelief laced in his voice, honest surprise. He spoke as if this wasn't public radio, like a one-on-one phone call between two friends. “Was it that bad?”

“What? No?” I hiccupped, rubbing my raw nose between the paw of my sweater. “You’re amazing. I loved it so much. You’re so talented.” the words rushed out in impatient whispers, as if the laundry room had ears and would eat up my words if I didn’t speak fast enough. “I had no idea you could write songs.”

“Thank you.” he murmured, his words lingering in the air with no intention of ending the conversation.

“And I’m sorry. Sorry for talking shit on-air, sorry for thinking so badly for you, sorry for everything and anything. And if it’s okay and if you think I’m not so much of a scary person as you imagined,” his warm chuckles reverberated through the airwaves, and I stuffed my face in my sweater in embarrassment, “I know you said you’d never want to go out with me, but do you think you could take those words back for one afternoon? So I can apologize in person.”

I could practically hear his smile from the other line. “It’s a date, Ten.”