annie-sae

[annie-sae]

A concept in my head that been rolling around a lot:

Hanahaki, but instead of it being triggered by unrequited love, it's triggered because all the love you have for a person turns inwards because you're too afraid to show it.

So it kills you, not because someone doesn't love you back, but because you don't let it out and all that love you have stored, that could grow into something beautiful, turns on you and turns your insides beautiful.

Love is growth, and without any place for it to grow outside, it grows in. If you confess, reciprocated or not, the disease goes away because it's no longer trapped. It gives self-destruction a new meaning.

[annie-sae]

Women have always been a part of our stories, although mostly got treated as villains worthy of punishment.

Don’t believe me? Let’s start with Lilith whose crime was refusing to submit to Adam’s will, asking to be treated as the equal she was. Or perhaps I should mention Eve who often gets blamed for the banishment from paradise, however Adam also ate from the forbidden fruit, yet nobody ever judges him, just Eve.

Maybe we should move towards the Greek tradition. Nowadays certain retellings about Persephone make a villain of Demeter. Why does the only way that story gets told now is by villainizing the mother who just wanted to find her child? Sound familiar? Unforgiving for the abduction of her daughter, she took away all crops and threatened to barren the earth as punishment for her loss while she kept looking with Hekate’s help. Demeter was in such uproar that it forced Zeus’ hand and made him; the king of the gods; go down into the underworld to bring Persephone back with her mother.

What about Aphrodite? Usually reduced to vain and envious, the story of her infidelity to Hephaestus often gets remembered, yet most that condemn the affair tend to forget that he was the one who demanded for her hand, that she didn’t want him and it was Zeus who practically sold her to him.

Perhaps we could talk about Alcippe who was attacked by one of Poseidon’s sons and when her father killed the perpetrator, he was the one put to trial, for seeking justice for his daughter. On the note of Poseidon, let’s not forget that he cursed Pasiphae to lay with the bull and bear the minotaur in payment not for a crime she committed but for her husband’s crime, she was punished for a man’s actions. What about Medusa? She was assaulted by Neptune inside Minerva’s temple and then punished for his actions; or perhaps a blessing to make sure no other man would ever touch her without consent.

Helen of Sparta (yes, Sparta and not Troy) was abducted not once but twice, first by Theseus and later by Paris, however she usually is the one getting blamed for the Trojan war.

The disregard and mistreatment of women are not new but they aren’t old news either. Mothers searching for their children get judged and women forced into roles they never asked for themselves get criticized, but how would we feel? It’s not okay that these stories, these myths can represent the experience of so many women nowadays.

[annie-sae]

Does anyone else picture a Destiel small town au while listening to this song?

I remember we were driving, driving in your car Speed so fast, I felt like I was drunk City lights lay out before us And your arm felt nice wrapped ‘round my shoulder And I had a feeling that I belonged I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone

FAST CAR, TRACY CHAPMAN

[annie-sae]

And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you. // insp. 

[annie-sae]

[annie-sae]

Nothing like going home for the holidays after you have lost connection with the faith you once grew but without your parents having knowledge of you leaving; because peace will be lost once you tell them you have left their faith.

[annie-sae]

I’ve always been a narnian fan but now that I’m older I can say that my liking of it has been layering and I can now understand a bit more the angst that the Pevensies felt. Because I too long for a place I cannot go back to and like Susan I’ve found myself often times asking myself if that actually happened or how much of that time was just in my head.

Just food for thought I guess.

[annie-sae]

sometimes i’m like “how many fictional boyfriends is too many??” and then i realize i can do whatever the fuck i want

[annie-sae]

More like overthinking it even months later

Person A: Why is it that only halfway through a conversation I realise that I've been oversharing all along?

Person B: Still better than realising it after the conversation is over and overthinking about it till 3 a.m.

[annie-sae]

I’ve learned that some people are like lifesavers. They come into your life and save you from drowning, but that’s it, you don’t need them once you are out of the water and they leave. They were never meant to stay with you forever.

[annie-sae]

With all this Hunger Games renaissance, this came to mind and I cannot brush it off

Hopefully I’ll manage to properly write this one out

[annie-sae]

The moment this tag pops up on a fic, I know my heart is gonna soar

[annie-sae]

i hope i redeemed myself to u all for my last post

[annie-sae]

i spent 15 mins making this rather than writing

[annie-sae]

For all his scars, Jason truly couldn’t understand how you were so adamant on calling him beautiful every day without fail.

You have been together for years, enough for him to note that you aren’t one to drop words without feeling them, however for all his brain capacity, he still couldn’t wrap his head around you looking at him; nasty J scar on almost the entirety of his left cheek or every other jagged line of terribly healed wounds gained over the years; holding his face between your hands as if he was made of glass before speaking the same set of words as every day of the last few years.

“You’re beautiful, Jason”.

He liked to think that after coming back from death and all the shit he has gone through since forever, there is a very small list of things that are still capable of surprising him but there you were, at the very top with your kind words; specially those. He sees himself in the mirror every morning before getting into the shower, there are days when the pain creeps up his back like a ghost summoned by those scars and in those instances he has to look away to avoid puking.

Then why? Why were you so hell bent on telling him that lie? Sure, he knew you didn’t consider it to be a lie per se or else you’d never say it; always honest to a fault; but how? You were the most amazing person he’d ever encountered, you were perfect in every way; fitting like a puzzle piece in his arms; so how could you in all your perfection, look at him and call him beautiful? Not handsome, beautiful. How could you choose such a word that would only begin to describe you, you were the beautiful one in his eyes, so why were you so generous by giving him a compliment that should only ever be used to describe the likes of you and not him; never a monster like him.

You on your part knew, you noticed every time how his eyes would open up just a millimeter in surprise to your words, nevermind that you had been saying them to his face for the last two years, but you couldn’t help it, he really was beautiful, those pretty green eyes full of fire and wit, a strong built that revealed him as a fighter, those scars that told a story of struggle unlike any other but that still weren’t enough to keep him down proving himself a true survivor and all that without mentioning how despite the way he went about delivering justice he had a good heart; you were well aware of the orphans he took care of and he was always so sweet to you.

He was beautiful, you just wished he could come to see it one day, but in the meantime you had no qualms on repeating it to him, maybe after a while of hearing it he’ll learn to believe it.

[annie-sae]

i have tears in my eyes. haikyu really came a long way, i am not ready for it to actually end in the anime :,))

[annie-sae]