#colifower posts

[colifower]

Thor week 2024!!!

Prompt: Modern AU

A/N: First drabble ever! This is my take on Thor's banishment on a modern setting.

Warning: mentions of blood on piss due to an injury

The drunkard kicked Thor awake. As he was going for a second one, Thor grabbed his leg and bit it. Hard. The assaulter howled in pain, giving him enough time to grab his ready-to-go backpack and run.

You learn fast on the streets.

He reached the fence out of memory. Thor smiled. He used to think Father had them made of gold, yet they’ve always been galvanized aluminium. Tears prickled down his cheeks. He looked towards the house: Loki’s room was lit up, yet he knew he couldn’t come back. He pissed blood on the bars that trapped him out.

[colifower]

If you want anything done you just have to do it yourself.

At first I thought maybe it was a coincidence, you know. I wouldnt sell any rookie that walks into my shop my best suit of armour, let alone give it away for free. That made sense.

And although my magical armours could have been considered lingerie at best they did do the job. Swords, poison, lava... You name it. Magical armours protect you from everything but looks. And hypothermia.

I can understand looking at the traveler shivering through the snow in booty shorts and a boob-showing crop top and think about what the hell are they thinking going out like that in a blizard, but there is always... The local Lascive Jeremy. Implications.

My companions did indeed wear bulkier wear, but I never thought much of it. They never offered to change, and I never asked them to. Their attempts to lend me a coat always ended the same way: magically blasted out of existance.

I didnt care much at the time. Good trick to show off at taverns, good laughs between friends. Good to bring enough attention to yourself to drive away the creepy loner that has been eyeing you the whole night.

It didnt matter, or so I thought to myself. At least my goal was set, and its price would be worth all the trouble.

It happened right after the solstice. I finally managed to free this kingdom from their local necromancer. Nasty business, something to do with a frog on the line of succession. Ill spare you the details: I finally got it.

And then there was rage.

It was the price stipulated, sure, but nobody told me that the Moon Armour, the most powerful set known, made by the one and only Moon Pecornio master smith and most renown for his works on female armour was a pair of nipple covers!

When the calm finally washed over me (and I must admit it took a while), I decided to put on matters into my own hands.

I first managed to sew two or three of my old sets together. It worked! But it still didnt quite finish to add up. With my hero earnings I managed to study a bit of blacksmithing, a bit of leatherwork, some magic here and there...

And well, I guess you know the rest of the story. Girl meets Fungus. They decide to settle down. She sets up an armour crafting business, they inherit the local tavern.

The shop has been gaining track in the last few years, word of mouth works wonders. I never would have thought there were that many peole afected by this problem! Its always a joy to help.

Every day, after I kiss my spouse in their hat, I walk to work covered head to toe in bright, glittery pink armour. Lascive Jeremy could not even see my eyes.

Ive never felt more free.

You’re a female hero in a fantasy world, and you are annoyed. The wizards keep giving you enchanted armor with incredible stats, but it looks RIDICULOUS! This one has nipples! This one has a hole over your heart! This one is just a necklace and a belt! Would they please STOP IT!

[mirkwoodest]

tagged by @grace-in-the-wilderness to do the thing where you type your name + core into pinterest and post 6 images that come up. Is this really how I find out that the guy who drew the iconic les mis illustration is my name twin?

tagging @colifower @thatiswhy @stedetheestallion @vonlipwig and whoever else feels moved by the spirit.

[thot-son-of-odin]

20 Questions For Writers

I’m taking @galaxythreads’ post as unofficial tagging because I want to do this lol

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

23!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

102,192

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Thor (unfortunately the hyperfixation has taken root)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. midas is king (and he holds me so tight)

2. a shrike to your sharp

3. be as you’ve always been

4. I am loved (I am loved)

5. our truth is burned from history (this is actually my favorite of all five, I’m glad it’s on here haha)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I used to, I haven’t really been recently since I’ve been busy (and lazy) but I wanna start doing it again.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This since the situation that Thor and Loki in does not get resolved lol,,,,,maybe I should write a sequel.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I actually thought most of mine ended happyish but I’m realizing the really happy ending is probably this one???

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Not really? I’ve been getting some weird anonymous comments that aren’t hate??? They’re just odd. And I feel like they come from the same person too. I’m not bothered by it, I’m just,,,,,,confused????

9. Do you write smut?

Yes! I only have one smut fic so far but I want to write more!

10. Do you write crossovers?

No, I’m just not really interested in them.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, and hopefully that never happens

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet! Blanket permission if anyone ever wants to, please just let me know!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes and I love doing it! It’s so much fun, plus you have another person to complain to when the fic isn’t going the way you want!

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

Thor and Loki, but both platonically and romantically if that makes sense? I am a brodinsons fan before I am a thorki fan.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have too many, writing is hard :’(

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I like to think I have a good head for plotting and coming up with ideas

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Actually writing down what I have planned. People should look thru my idea list and write some of the fics I’ve thought of lol

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Think it can be good in small quantities if you’re simply using google translate but if you’re trying to write a lot in that language, you should probably either already know it or ask for help from someone who does. As a reader tho, it’s not entirely helpful unless there’s a translation also given — I think it takes you out of the fic if you have to look it up

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor who

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Hmm I feel like my fav fic shifts from week to week. Right now it’s mother make me a big gray cloud because it’s the longest I’ve written and it’s also finished!! So super excited about it!

Tagging @babygirlthor, @worstloki, @thorarms, @nostalgia-tblr, @shinysoroka, @thortwenty151, @colifower, and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it!

[giltandgreen]

I posted 910 times in 2022

128 posts created (14%)

782 posts reblogged (86%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@colifower

@worstloki

@ladyofthestayingpower

@roruna

@jonquilclegane

I tagged 185 of my posts in 2022

#loki - 152 posts

#sigyn - 128 posts

#loki god of mischief - 118 posts

#loki god of stories - 117 posts

#loki god of outcasts - 116 posts

#loki god of lies - 116 posts

#logyn - 115 posts

#loki x sigyn - 109 posts

#sigyn x loki - 109 posts

#norse myth - 79 posts

Longest Tag: 91 characters

#sigyn when teenage sleipnir comes home after being out all night partying with his friends.

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Loki: I have the sharpest memory. Name one thing I've forgotten.

Thor: You left me in a parking lot three weeks ago.

Loki: No, that was on purpose.

253 notes - Posted September 23, 2022

#4

Loki: So, earlier in the meadhall...

Loki: Do you think Sigyn was flirting with me then?

Thor:

Thor: The two of you have been married for how many centuries now?

Loki:

Loki: Yeah, but do you think she was flirting with me?

289 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

#3

Odin: Welcome to the Fuck Loki Support Group.

Sigyn: [Looking around at Odin, Thanos, the Other, Laufey, and Malekeith] I may have misunderstood the purpose of this meeting.

302 notes - Posted February 7, 2022

#2

Narvi: What do I do if I like someone romantically?

Loki: Well, the best thing to do is be yourself. All good relationships are built on honesty and communication.

Narvi: Is that how you got Mom?

Loki: I'm going to level with you... I have no idea how I married your mother and at this point I'm too afraid to ask.

312 notes - Posted June 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Thor: I must warn you friends, my brother may now be more dangerous than ever before.

The Other Avengers: How come?

Thor: I may have let Loki watch the 'Home Alone' series.

454 notes - Posted March 1, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[good-enemy]

I was tagged by @thatsnot-our-lamp to post the following:

Lockscreen

Last song

Last taken pic

Last saved pic

Okay so my real last taken pic was of my computer screen with stats on it but it felt wrong to post that lmfao so here's. Apparently the one I took before it which was me writing down which wjsn member is which sign for an edit lol 😅 my camera roll is 50% concert vids and 50% a second notes app 🤣

Tagging @wtnytv @colifower and whoever else wants to <3

[colifower]

Thor's first fistfight doesn't go as planned. He is not complainig. Not at all.

[thot-son-of-odin]

Last sentence tag game:

The rules: Post the last sentence you wrote and tag as many people as there are words.

I got tagged by @nostalgia-tblr

He can confront them both at once.

Tagging @babygirlthor @worstloki @thorarms @thortwenty151 @shinysoroka @galaxythreads and @colifower

[colifower]

Oh damn I forgot that ramadan started the 22nd!

For any new followers I tag all my food and food related posts with the tag #food so that ppl fasting can avoid it if theyd like to.

Happy ramadan everybody! Stay safe :D

[colifower]

Spanish tv does this all the time w american shows that have the beep built in.

Like for example: there was an episode of b99 where rosa was meant to say f*ck but what we watched was rosa saying Joder on top of a beep sound

This is 100% bc cursing is waaaaay less of A Thing. Like you wouldnt get curses on a kids tv show, but in things like news footage, reality tv, tv contests... is quite common and never censored

replacing curses in sentences with harmless words like heck and then sometimes even censoring heck to “h*ck” is a good meme but an even better one would be, like, censoring the wrong word in a sentence entirely. example:

go fuck yours*lf

[colifower]

THE FUCKING READMORE NEEDS AN EXTRA SPACE BETWEEN THE PARAGRAPHS.

[colifower]

BottomThoruary Masterlist

A somewhat comprehensive compilation of works published for the #BottomThoruary challenge

Please feel free to post after the 29th and tag/message me if you want your works included in this masterlist :P

Also, check out the AO3 collection!

First, Fist, Feast:

Is this your first time? (by colifower)

Still you lead me and I follow (by @illwynd)

Jotuns:

Thor the algae soap boy. A Tesseroki AU slashfic (by colifower)

Odin finds out:

Boy problems (by colifower)

Thor's day / Freeform:

I'm in love with Y/N's mom (by colifower)

Thor's day (by @thot-son-of-odin )

Look who's digging their own grave (by @worstloki)

Frigga finds out:

In fiery passion (by colifower)

Loki is the worst wingman:

A cabin in the artic woods (by colifower)

Enter the storm (by @presidentlokis-hornyhelmet)

Laufey:

Dinner time :D (by colifower)

Night changes (by @presidentlokis-hornyhelmet)

[colifower]

Something is up in the Shady Acres, and it's the new guy's fault. Odin's certain of it, although he doesn't seem to remember what exactly is going on.

[colifower]

Theres this corpse in my unis morgue lying there. It was this guy that died a nd donated his body to science, the corpse is too fat for med students to open him up and do ~assignments~ or whatever (it wouldnt be a good target to practice on or so they say), so they have his corpse just laying there in a pool of preservatives, naked and exposed for everyone to see bc they cannot legaly get rid of it.

[colifower]

Tess chills with the besties

[colifower]

A little present for @worstloki​, for organizing this whole challenge!