#cohrnothing

[lorspolairepeluche]

last line meme

@bladeverbena wanted some baby-cradling goodness so here’s nothingboy getting to hold his (future) nephew for the first time, plus some bonus feelings

“Would you like to hold him?” Yenica is already shifting the sling so she can remove the baby from it. Nothing stares at her. The crown princess of Sonina, renowned for beauty and wit and wisdom, is offering her perfect, days-old baby to him to hold. To him. He wants to reach out and take him, hold baby Makari close and hum to him and…and…and hold him. He has a fleeting vision of the first time he ever saw another child, sees that frightened five-year-old face, and the old ache returns, the need to comfort and kiss and care. “Yes,” he breathes. “Yes, I — I’d love to.” Carefully, carefully, she lifts Makari from the sling and cradles him, slipping him gently into Nothing’s waiting arms. “Support his head,” she says reflexively, even though he has already made sure Makari’s little head is nestled in the crook of his elbow. With a great sigh of, “Thank the gods,” that is at least half-affected, she sits heavily on the edge of Cohr’s bed. She lays her elegant hand over Cohr’s, like it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. Like Nothing doesn’t need to convince himself every time that it’s not a sin to long for that touch. Like he didn’t, just last night, crawl into the bed beside Cohr to comfort himself with both their overwhelming closeness and the familiar shame of wanting exactly that. Yenica’s mouth works a little, teeth digging gently into her bottom lip, before she speaks. “In my own defense, they’ve always been a pretentious little shit. I thought it was just that returning in force when they locked themself in the library and snuck out at night and told me I wouldn’t understand.” She makes a fairly accurate, if mocking, imitation of Cohr’s timbre for those last two words. “But…I really don’t think I would have understood. I’m not the magic-wielder in the family, after all. Mama explained it to me, after you brought Koshka back. That there was a curse on them — they put it there themself, I think? — and something about their magic being unstable and trapped and explosive. I guess that explains why they pushed me into a bookshelf that one time. We were both being unfair to each other that day, Koshka and me.” A spark of warmth lights in his chest at hearing her call them the same name he does. “They love you,” he says softly.

tagging @solipsism-lemonade for the three-way ping pong

[lorspolairepeluche]

augh, FINE. ship tropes tag

tagged by both @solipsism-lemonade and the IMPATIENT @bladeverbena (with love) to do this for Lost Lake Cohr and Nothing.

height difference | mutual pining | first kiss | first love | wedding | in-jokes | lgbt+ | family disapproves | friend disapproves | would die for each other | fake relationship | arranged wedding | cuddlers | pda friendly | and they were roommates | holding hands | secret relationship | opposing worldviews | opposing personalities | opposing goals | getting a pet | have a kid in an au (read: seven kids in their dnd “canon”) | want kids | grow old together | previous relationship failures | rests head on shoulder | share a bed | token dummies | relationship doubts | they have a song | first date | share a jacket | sharing a blanket | mutual interests | study buddies | bathing together | crash-into hello | accidental nudity | laundry | same hobbies | cooking for each other | big fancy gala (kinda) | sibling rivalry | hair stroking | dancing | laying in the grass | watching stars together | watching the other sleep | shared values | friends to lovers | enemies to lovers  | lovers to enemies | childhood friends | slow burn | love triangle | toxic relationship | sitting on each other’s laps | can’t be together | hugs | forehead touches | neck kisses | car/motorbike rides | compliments | nicknames | falling asleep together | late night talks | gifts

feel free to ask for deets on any of these >:3c

template under the cut for @tauntingcrow and @bladeverbena (GRYM GRYM GRYM) and @figmentera

height difference | mutual pining | first kiss | first love | wedding | in-jokes | lgbt+ | family disapproves | friend disapproves | would die for each other | fake relationship | arranged wedding | cuddlers | pda friendly | and they were roommates | holding hands | secret relationship | opposing worldviews | opposing personalities | opposing goals | getting a pet | have a kid in an au | want kids | grow old together | previous relationship failures | rests head on shoulder | share a bed | token dummies | relationship doubts | they have a song | first date | share a jacket | sharing a blanket | mutual interests | study buddies | bathing together | crash-into hello | accidental nudity | laundry | same hobbies | cooking for each other | big fancy gala | sibling rivalry | hair stroking | dancing | laying in the grass | watching stars together | watching the other sleep | shared values | friends to lovers | enemies to lovers  | lovers to enemies | childhood friends | slow burn | love triangle | toxic relationship | sitting on each other’s laps | can’t be together | hugs | forehead touches | neck kisses | car/motorbike rides | compliments | nicknames | falling asleep together | late night talks | gifts  

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find game, vol. 9

an old tag from sol that i’m just gettin to now

cart

A kra-koom like a cannon blast, and the door of steel bars all but leaps off its hinges. Nothing almost falls out of the cage, right off the cart, and his son — his son! — catches him, steadies him. “You have to get there,” Bel says.

stick

Cohr cuts him off by pulling him to them, hugging him, burying his face in their shoulder. “You fool,” they whisper as his blood sticks to their arms. “I forgive you. For everything you think you’ve done, anything you believe was wrong with you.” “When my wings are gone,” he mumbles into their skin. “When my face is bare. When I’m a person, when the world is free of this curse…then. Then it’ll be over. I can finally go. When I’ve done my work. Until then, I have to carry the pain.” He pulls back to finally meet their eyes. “I’m sorry I hurt you. I’ll…I’ll take your forgiveness for that, at least.”

lift

“Here.” Nothing sets the neatly-folded pile of clothes — which were decidedly not neatly folded when Cohr tossed them aside for their swim — beside them on the edge of the platform. He’s already wearing his own trousers. “Get dressed, and I’ll fly us back.” Part of Cohr mutters about what if I don’t want to, but Noya’s right. Dawn’s coming. The thought that it’s the last dawn at which they have to part cheers them a bit as they clamber off the mattress — stretching more for the benefit of Nothing’s sneaking glances than their own body — and set about dressing themself again. The pendant is back in with their clothes, they note, and they place it around their neck once again. He’ll get it back before they leave. Once they’ve done up their coat again, Nothing picks them up — Cohr turns his face for a quick kiss, “for luck,” — “We don’t need it for this,” he answers, “but I’ll still take it.” He runs forward, bursting out into the clearing with his wings flaring, beating, lifting them off above the lake.

no tint anywhere! all black and white!

string

Nothing sets his own sword and shield against a tree. “I haven’t prayed yet tonight. Would you join me?” “Of course.” They’ve started doing this, going to the little shrine to the Sundered God that Nothing built in a secluded bit of the clearing, offering flowers and fruit and prayers for the unity and peace of both the god and the world. Cohr brings the note from Mother — an offering of a happiness for the god of hope and life — and a tangled, knotted string — their offering to his other half, the god of death. Both halves are necessary. Both halves in balance.

free tag; if you want to do this, pick it up here! if you do, your words are girl, dog, lake, love, and late!

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find game, vol. 5

@bladeverbena continues the ping pong game

no harsh here; we must be very soft.

forgot

“It was my fault.” “How?” “I let her think she could…could do something about it. Told her she was strong. I let her taunt him, let her confront him. I thought we were too valuable to him alive. I was wrong. I was so wrong.” He grips handfuls of his hair, the strands kinked and interrupted by his fingers. “He grabbed her, and she just…went still. He let her go, and she still didn’t move. And he looked at me. Right at me, and he said…he said what I shouldn’t have forgotten. That this is my fault. That trying to be more than what I am just…always ends in tragedy. My curse hurt her. I hurt her. I killed her, as surely as if the shadow’s hand had been mine.”

behind

He hauls the axe behind him, and he swings, embedding the axe into a trunk with a flexing of his back and a short, solid thud. And again. And again. Every time a little deeper into the trunk. It’s not quick. It isn’t easy. He works at it with a grim single-mindedness, a rhythm that begins to pound into Cohr’s head just as it must be pounding into his, drowning out all coherent thought besides haul. Swing. Thud. Set up. Haul. Swing. Thud. Set up. And that’s the point. It must be. He’s forcing out thought with this backbreaking, slow, meditative work. Cohr can’t tear their eyes away. The loggers in the rest of the forest use saws, the giant two-person ones that can cut down a tree in thirty seconds, given a skilled team of foresters. This is such a lonely way of cutting down a tree, this solitary swing, tug, swing, tug. So Cohr waits. They wait for him so he’s not alone as he chops. Something about him says he’s used to being alone. He’s certainly convinced himself it’s better if he’s alone. I hurt people.

desperate

Something flickers ahead, in the thicket of fallen trees. A gasp of wait turns into a whimper on Cohr’s tongue, but they force themself toward it. Come. Is it in their head; is it just another memory to torture them; is it real; who knows, who cares. They trip and fall to the ground, the pine needles and dirt scraping the palms of their hands. Let the light of the moon guide your way. You have suffered. You are suffering. Please, just a little further. Some desperate part of them clings to the words, pulling them along as if hand-over-hand on a rope tethering them to shore. Cohr pushes themself back to their feet, trying to see again whatever it was they glimpsed. “Please…”

and no crave either i guess!

sending the tag back to you smith, and @solipsism-lemonade since ze’s doing a lot of writing! your words are black, hair, grief, ghost, and shudder.

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find, vol. 8

stole the tag from sol this time!

bowl

Bel chucks another stone into the lake. It splashes violently — not violently enough. The water just swallows it and becomes placid save for a few ripples. He needs a wave. Something to drench the shores and drag half of them back in with it. If he’s going to be trapped here, he should at least get to mess the place up when he’s angry, right? He rears back with another rock. “BEL!” The rock tumbles into the lake, but its splash is nothing compared to his own as he’s bowled right over into the water by a flying — literally flying — tackle from a girl his own size with a tremendous kabloosh. He struggles to the surface — not hard; she’s not strong enough to knock him far — and scrambles back out. “What the hell?” “It’s me!” The girl stands up in the water, chin-length hair made shiny black and plastered to her face with water. “Dine!”

climb

He takes a breath and knocks on the window. The curtains are pulled open, perhaps not as soon as they once would have been, but to the face of the same woman. It was always with a fond eyeroll that she opened the window for him when they were young, always with a kiss she greeted him as he climbed in. Now Bazin simply stares through the glass, mouth open and face blotchy with shed tears.

side

“So…he took you on?” Cohr and Nothing set the log down in its place wedged into the logs below it, and they can finally turn and see him. “As a student? Not really. As…as an experiment, maybe. He liked the wings. He wanted to see what they could add to a dance. He started by teaching me the basic positions and having my wings follow the movements of my arms, just to…to get the sense of how they moved. For both of us.” His foot slips back, and his right arm almost floats up in a dreamily-remembered pose. His right wing follows it, and his left extends out to his side to follow his left arm. Fourth position, glorified by his wings, the diadem he wears glinting. He looks like a prince himself. “No wonder he liked you,” Cohr says softly. “The old man always did like beauty.”

wedge

Cohr scrutinizes the chair Nothing sits in. He made it wider than necessary for one person… They get up and plop themself right beside him in the same seat, wriggling to wedge themself between him and the arm of the chair. When they’re comfortably squeezed in, they smile up at him. “Hi.” “Hi,” he says back, bewildered and amused. “What’s this?” “Making myself feel better for once instead of moping. You should try it sometime,” they tell him, prim. Nothing laughs. Nothing laughs, a full, deep sound, and puts a strong arm around Cohr, squeezing their arms to their sides even more. “You already do that for me.”

leg

“It hasn’t been the same. I haven’t been the same. It doesn’t…sit right. The magic, it doesn’t — it doesn’t fit. Something was wrenched out of its place, and it…it won’t go back right, no matter how much jostling or trying to make it fit. It doesn’t fit anymore. I don’t fit anymore. Not without her. It just…explodes. When I get angry.” Nothing gently turns Cohr’s arms over in his hands, revealing the bandages stained with blood from both of them. “And tonight?” “I punched a tree and scratched open my arms instead,” Cohr admits, almost under their breath. “And it worked.” “You’re right,” Nothing says quietly. “We are the same kind of fool.” He groans a little again as he swings his legs off the bed and carefully stands. “Come on. Let’s go to the lake to talk.” “You can’t go in the lake. The bandages—” “I won’t get them wet.” He smiles bitterly over his shoulder at Cohr. “I’ve done this before.”

throwing the tag back to @solipsism-lemonade, how about another for @bladeverbena, and honestly if you follow me and you just wanna be tagged in these things, go ahead and send me an ask or reply to the post, and i’ll add you to the tags! your words this time are secret, joy, effect, hug, and word.

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find game, vol. 7

@solipsism-lemonade done got me again

(in)finite

“I’m sorry.” Why is he apologizing to Cohr? He should apologize to Zarza for ever permitting her murderer to cross the border of this sanctuary. “She hasn’t been the same since Isa…” Cohr looks at him, sharper than they intended. “Then she was here?” “She was here.” Nothing’s face is sad by default, but somehow he looks infinitely sadder now. “She was one of us. And…she died.”

no cake. :c we are cakeless. need some sweets here. no pole either. there’s definitely a sex joke in there somewhere.

cup

They weren’t lying. He’s beautiful. Even in this form. Cohr hops down from the platform — the swan who watched them with bewilderment from where he was inspecting the workmanship squawks in surprise — and runs down to the lake. “Hey. Noya!” He swims easily back to them as they crouch at the water’s very edge, and they hold out their hands. The swan pushes out his head to reach them, and Cohr cups his beak in both hands to look him in those silver eyes. “I’ll be back,” they promise. “I’m coming back tonight — and I’ll tell you how we break this curse.” They kiss the very tip of his beak. “I can’t wait.”

spine

The letters begin to swim, and they blink furiously, scrubbing at their eyes with the hand not holding the book’s worn spine. Not now, not now, not so close to the answer. “Transformational,” they hiss again, looking back to the book with renewed angry determination. “Animal transformation. Linked to day and night. Linked to a place? Damn it—” They throw down the book with a sound that isn’t nearly loud or violent enough to satisfy their frustration. “Where are you?” They snatch up another book at random, whipping a page as they turn it — and it tears off in their hand.

tagging you once more, sol, and uhhhh oh jeez @gwynbleiddyn ??? OH @cringepdf you should also b writing probably maybe i’m not the boss of you. your words are flare, grim, deep, howl, and slip.

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find game, vol. 6

@solipsism-lemonade has made this a three-way ping-pong; LESGO

flower is actually in this one already!

ground

“Perhaps the lord of the city didn’t hate me at first. His wife did, though I didn’t know it. She never saw me. Not until I was ten years old, and one of the twin boys she carried was born dead. Then…then, she had me taken out to the square. They tied me to a post and whipped me for killing the lord’s unborn child. He never got to take a single breath, and it was the fault of my curse.” You were a child, Cohr wants to say. A child, and they whipped you bloody. But they keep their lips pressed tight together, or they will only drive themself to fury over it. “But…where my blood fell on the ground…plants sprung up. Not right away — no miracles ever happened in that city. But…my blood had undone the effects of my curse, even just that little bit. So I gave them more blood. Whatever little it did, it helped then limp forward for another five years.”

no actual rim but some words containing it... i picked a cool one, i hope

They release the monster with a primal scream, and it surges out of them, the echo and embodiment of their rage manifested as a wave of pure force. Cohr thrusts their arms out forward, and they feel, rather than see, the magic push forward at their direction, crushing and knocking down and breaking and shattering until there is nothing left for the shadows to cling to, nothing to change into a menacing shape. “I,” Cohr whispers to the fled shadow, “am your end.”

center

Cohr straightens, turns to Mama, and bows, extending a hand. “Your Majesty, may I have this dance?” Mama’s eyebrows don’t even rise. She smiles and places her hand in theirs. “Your Royal Highness. Of course you may.” “By your leave, Your Majesty?” Cohr asks Mother with exaggerated politeness. “Off you go, you comedians,” Mother says, hiding a smile by waving mock-dismissively. Cohr leads Mama down the steps and to the floor of the ballroom. The crowd parts around them, making a path to the Rindaryen crest in colored marble in the center of the floor. Mama’s gown swishes as Cohr pulls her gently around to face them, putting their other hand on her waist. She places her own on their shoulder, graceful in her gold elbow gloves, and Cohr steps her forward into the dance.

wind

“What about rocks that originate from outside the barrier?” “I think they make ripples too — Zarza tried it.” She had always been a thorough scientist. “So if you bring a rock in, it’ll make ripples, but the wind that comes in still doesn’t.” “Perhaps the wind is still considered to be outside the clearing?” “Who has a good enough throwing arm to get a rock to the water from outside the barrier?” Nothing laughs. “Maybe me, maybe Jorda, maybe Zarza. Maybe you.” “Oh, yeah, that’d be fun. From starless night to moonlit refuge, guide this rock and don’t let it hit anyone in the head. Excellent idea.”

strand

Cohr says a quick, quiet apology to him — and heaves him up, onto their back. His feet and his wings drag on the dirt as Cohr steps back toward Falada. Their clumsy wrapped hands clutch Nothing’s forearms hard enough that they pray there aren’t bruises there tomorrow. “Come on,” they huff, hitching him higher on their shoulders. “Up on the horse.” They have to get him back to the others. To someone who can help him. Heal him. “Barrier’s close,” they tell Nothing’s unconscious body on a grunt, shifting him little by little to lie draped behind the saddle. “I just have to — get you there — get back across — then enter — the other side of the lake.” There, he’s on. Cohr lets themself breathe a moment, going to Falada’s other side to tuck stray strands of hair back into Nothing’s tied-up bun. “We’re gonna get you back.”

tagging you back, sol, and also @bladeverbena, @junebuggeryy (anything cooking for your delightfully wacko kids?), and anyone else who wants to! your words are (un)fortunate, rock, book, snake, and magic.

[lorspolairepeluche]

word find game, vol. 4

smith tagged “everyone who sees this and is writing something” so here we go again

party

“She needs to rest,” Mama says, with a pointed emphasis on the last word. “Gara is with her; he knows how to take care of his wife. What she needs from us is to pick up where she left off as best we can so we can take the stress off her. If she saw you right now, she’d be worrying just as much as you. And you know her — when she’s worried, she insists on working.” “Right.” Cohr forces themself to breathe deeper. Breathe out for longer than you breathe in. Inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for eight. LaRue taught them that as an exercise to combat stage fright before their first performance at a party when they were eight. After that performance, he’d smiled at them for the first time. “Right.”

run

“SHUT U—” Cohr chokes off into a gasp. They almost let it free. They stumble forward; Yena’s barely a green blur in their vision now as they pant, “Get — get out of the way. Get out — of the way.” “Oh, no, you don’t.” The green blur steps into their path. “You’re not getting out of it that easy.” “I said get out of the way.” Cohr forces their voice to stay steady, even as real acid rises in their throat from the effort of forcing down the blast that wants to level Yenica and everything else around them. “Please.” “No.” “Yena—” “You don’t get to run away this time, Koshka.” They shove blindly, and their hands make contact with her arm, her side, and push her bodily away from them. Yena’s shriek clashes with the noise of her crashing into a bookshelf and the books rattling, raining down around her. Cohr barely hears it. Before the thing inside them can fight its way out, Cohr flees.

jump

“I don’t do magic.” They’re firmer this time, and they hope it overrules the fact that they had to insist. “Do you?” In answer, he reaches hesitantly across the space between them and takes their hand. It’s a sudden surprise to them that the scrapes on their palms are still stinging. Nothing places his hand over the ball of theirs, where the skinning is worst, and closes his eyes. It feels like the water of the lake, cold and still soothing, like jumping into the harbor on the hottest day of summer. It flows from the skin of their hand all through their body, like every nerve is a rivulet of crystal clear rainwater, and pools in their other palm, the arm they hit on the corner of the cabin, even the exhaustion in their limbs. It stings like salt, but it soothes that soon, a gentle shh in something like Mama’s voice. When Nothing opens his eyes, the wounds are gone, and Cohr is surprised that their hair isn’t dripping like they were caught in a sudden thunderstorm. “Yes,” Nothing says quietly. “I do.”

fuck

He’s striding away, not looking back, shoulders stiff and straight. “I told you to go. You shouldn’t be here. I’m sorry.” “At least look at me when you say that!” He stops, and they’ve gotten through to him? No — no, he’s stopped before a tree and is raising the axe. “Back away if you don’t want to get hurt.” “Fuck you.” But they stop a ways away from him — months researching a forest means they’ve had more than their fair share of warnings from the foresters about staying clear of both axes and falling trees.

grunt

A soft groan comes from where Nothing’s face is half-buried in the pillow. He moves an arm to push himself up, despite Sanea’s little cry of caution, and he grunts his laborious way into a sitting position. “How long?” he asks. “An hour,” Sanea says, hand floating toward his bandages. “Maybe more.” “Thank you,” he tells her, taking her hand and setting it down on the bed in a quiet refusal. “Can you…let me talk to Cohr, please?”

hm. lotta hurty in this one. (no tags bc i am none braincell w left exhausted)

[lorspolairepeluche]

ship aesthetics - cohrnothing (cohr elpian prosper nadiyevchen rindaryen/nothing ilmatrovich rindaryen)

i love you [...] because you with all your magic powers were determined that i should love you because there was nothing for you but that i would love you

- nikki giovanni

A HAPPY BELATED SMITHDAY TO @bladeverbena MY LOVE here’s some sappy lovebirds aesthetic for u i love u v much mwah mwah

[lorspolairepeluche]

52 for Cohr because I love them. And then 50 and 51 for Dring, because I also love them. Annnddd 37, 39, 91 and 92 for Mani.

52. If your character was granted a single use of Wish, what would they use it for?

If you asked them this at the start of their adventure, the answer would be a selfish one: undo the destruction of Odenia College. It wasn't the last place they ever felt safe -- that would have been on the ship -- but it was the first place they ever felt they could call home, other than actual home back in Sonina.

But after a few years of adventuring, specifically with one particularly special tiefling? Their Wish would be for him to see himself, for even a moment, how they see him: beautiful, kind, sweet, funny, beloved. To let him see that he never had to work to be accepted or loved. He only ever had to be himself with them.

50. Who in the party would your character prioritize rescuing, in dire circumstances?

Webster. Because he's the cleric. But also because he's their best friend.

51. Is your character the most swayed by ethos, pathos, or logos?

Pathos for sure. Dring is driven by emotion. They're trying to learn more of ethos, though -- for the Raven Queen.

37. What stereotypical role would your character play in a high school AU/if they attended a normal high school? (Nerd, jock, bully, goth, etc.)

The weird kid who, after one summer vacation, returns for senior year as this absolutely STUNNINGLY hot lesbian.

39. Is there any particular weapon, item, etc. that your character longs to find?

Well, one of them she's already found -- her moon axe, semi-sacred weapon once protected by the temple she grew up in. There was always the expectation that she would one day wield it as a knight of Selûne, and when it was stolen, it was only natural for her to pursue the thieves and recover it for herself.

The rest is less of an item and more of a purpose. Since birth, Mani has grown up as an acolyte of Selûne, with expectations that she would, of course, follow both mothers' footsteps to serve the goddess. But she's started wondering if there's anything else for her. Is it her destiny to simply do good in someone else's name, even if that someone is her goddess? Can she be selfish, find her own love, her own way? She wants to try.

91. What is your character’s guiltiest pleasure?

You know...I still don't have a good answer for this one. Rain check.

92. What does your character hope for the afterlife?

A place beside the mother and grandmother who have loved her from afar her whole life. That she will have earned that place. That it won't matter whether she earned it or not. That their love will be the same, that it will be honest and unlimited, either way.

100 D&D Character Questions

[lorspolairepeluche]

“Ilmater wouldn't mind -- an act of love is an act of triumph over adversity. I don't know about Ioun, but I'm sure she wouldn't mind if it was you and me.” “So, next temple of Ilmater we come to?” “I do need to visit Olivias...” “And you wonder why I fell in love with you.”

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO MY BEST MAN SMITH @bladeverbena!!! I commissioned mal @vvakarians for a piece of our sappy cleric couple, Cohr and Nothing, and jesus GOTT do i LOVE IT. i love them, i love mal, i love smith, i love everything right now.

[lorspolairepeluche]

sometimes i like things casually, and sometimes i come up with the broad outline of a new and genderfucked choreography for swan lake just so cohr can be the prince and nothing can be the swan king

(quiet tag of @bladeverbena bc it’s his son that i’m putting under a fucking curse in this version oops)

[lorspolairepeluche]

Horse Chesspiece!

♘ - Something my muse was embarrassed about.

I know Mama says that she knows best, being hundreds of years old, but this time I am damned sure she was doing it SOLELY to embarrass me. Asking when she can expect GRANDCHILDREN from Nothing and me??? I swear, she lives to rile me up. Thank Ioun I had the presence of mind to point out she already HAS a grandchild by Yen. I always end up stumbling over my words when she pulls something like this; it took me a good thirty seconds to get out that we’re not together. Gods. Her absolutely shit-eating smile as she watched us fumble. MAMA.

(I like seeing Nothing turn pink as much as the next bastard, but he turned magenta, I swear.)

- excerpt from the journal of Cohr Rindaryen, cleric of Ioun, regarding the first time they introduced their future husband to their mothers in Sonina.

diary entry prompts

[lorspolairepeluche]

And 💔 for fun and angst!

💔 - An entry made when my muse was extremely sad or depressed.

My dearest,

Please, please, please don’t blame yourself. This was my decision, and mine alone, and I am so sorry. The only thing I wanted was to keep you and our family safe. He offered me the exchange--my life for all of yours--and I took it. He was even kind enough to let me stay long enough to see our daughter. Not that that’s ever a word to describe him--kind. Lenient, perhaps. Permissive.

Even at the end, I still go on about the exact right word.

The day we met, we buried the bodies of my classmates, my teachers, at Odenia. I promised them I would find out who ordered their deaths, who was at fault for the destruction of our home. I promised them out of love for them. I kept that promise. I found out who. And now I surrender myself to him, for love of you and our family.

If at all necessary, tell them all I love them. Bel especially; I am guilty of once again taking a parent from him. Make sure Elpian knows I love her as she grows up. Gil too; he will always be my most precious. Tell Corax I am so glad to have seen him free. I love him. I love them all. And in Sonina: my mothers, Yen and Kor and Road and Vi -- make sure they know I love them. 

And, my darling, I love you. I have never loved anyone like I love you. I never will. You will always be my one and only, and I’m so sorry to leave before we’ve had the many happy years together that you deserve. Always remember that you are worth everything, that nothing is too good for you, because you are the best the world has to offer. I adore you.

Perhaps it was a decision made in desperation, but I have not yet regretted it, save that I leave you without me. My love is always with you.

Forgive me, my love.

Yours completely and always,

Cohr.

-- an entry from the diary of Cohr Rindaryen, cleric of Ioun, addressed to their husband Nothing, dated the night before they died. (Note: other entries follow, thanks to the fact that Nothing and the aforementioned Corax located Vecna [the unnamed ‘him’ in the entry] and rescued Cohr’s soul from his clutches, returning them to life. The page is half-torn out, but neatly, as if Cohr later started to rip it out but changed their mind partway through. Perhaps to keep a reminder of that time?)

diary entry prompts

[lorspolairepeluche]

6, 8, 20, 30, 34 and 35 for Cohr.

6. If you tell the truth, an evil person gets to walk away free. If you lie, you may be able to send them away like they deserve. Is honesty worth more than justice?

“My integrity has never been worth more than the greater good. But I wonder -- why is this evil person walking away free without my lie? If the objective truth is that they are a bad person, why must I lie for them to be punished? I don’t understand.

“Well...I suppose I do understand. Underwater...Nothing’s parents... If there had been no way to prove to the town that it wasn’t Nothing’s fault... I would have lied. I would have made something up to convince them. I couldn’t watch them be exploited anymore, and I couldn’t watch them hurt Nothing anymore.”

8. If you could gain as much money as you want for losing a sense, would you do it?

“Absolutely not. Money is not and has never been the goal. Now, knowledge... Ask me if I could lose one of my senses to gain knowledge, and my answer might be different.”

20. Are there people in this world who, no matter how much time and penitence is given, should never be forgiven?

“I...don’t like this question. Mainly because the first image that comes to mind is of Nothing being asked it, back when he was...when he blamed himself, and his immediate answer being, ‘yes, me.’

“But I suppose that gives me my answer: the people who made him believe that he was evil when he’s never had a single evil cell in his body. They should be shown how they hurt him, how they hurt those around them, but...never forgiven. To do that to a child...”

30. Do we live in a world of parallels? Can there be no hope without grief? No happiness without suffering? Or is a utopia possible?

“Utopia...probably not possible, not with all the evil forces in the world or fighting to get back into it. But parallels? No. There is always grief and suffering, but we are charged with making sure there is as little as possible, both in ourselves and in others. That, I think, is the point of living.”

34. What path appeals to you more? An exciting dream that leaves you possibly penniless and alone or a drab existence where you have steady success.

“Having had...both, I suppose -- I think I prefer adventure. But not without aim. Honestly, for all the time I was adventuring, that ‘drab existence’ was the goal. But it’s not so drab, now that I have it. I have my husband and our children and the orphanage and the school. And trust me, with one child teething, one with wings, and one just learning to use cantrips, and so many others around, there is not a single boring day here. This ‘drab existence’ is an adventure. And I fought for it, and I don’t regret it.”

35. Is every person in this world wholly unique or can they be categorized? Can they be grouped and mentally dissected? Are you just another sheep in another flock or are you the sole unique soul?

“You say ‘unique or categorized’ like they’re mutually exclusive. Of course everyone’s unique. But find two people, even from opposite corners of the world, and you’ll almost always find something in common between them. Everyone has their hidden depths, but sometimes those depths are similar to someone else’s, and that can be a source of great comfort -- I would know. And of course we flock together, we find those similarities. People can’t live alone; we need other people. Don’t frame that like it’s a bad thing.”

oc questions: no easy answers edition

[lorspolairepeluche]

The Fool, King of Wands, Ace of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, Two of Wands, Five of Swords... for Cohr.

0. The Fool - when you first created your character, what did you originally envision for them?

Cohr’s original inspiration was, of all people, my mother: an intelligent, educated, and yet eminently faithful woman. Mom’s the reason I realized I could make what I wanted of my own faith, and it’s what Cohr did with their faith in the Maker in their original Dragon Age iteration.

King of Wands - the most romantic man your character knows.

Their little brother Korbiy would win, except he leans more toward the hopeless-romantic, and Cohr has sat with him through one too many breakup cries for him to claim that top spot.So, clearly, the winner is their husband Nothing. Soft touches, loving words, good comforting hugs and cuddles and kisses--he loves his Cohr, and he’s very good at showing it (once he lets himself).

★ Ace of Pentacles - how has your character grown since their conception?

Welllllll Cohr is not much like my mom anymore. They’ve taken more inspiration from my own struggles, with faith, anger management, and guilt. But Cohr’s also grown into a devoted friend to their loved ones and a patient, caring lover (to guess who, babey).

ー☆* Ace of Wands - from where do you derive inspiration for your character?

Cohr runs mostly without inspiration now, thanks to them getting so developed over the last few years. But images and songs and scenes sometimes smack me upside the head with THIS REMINDS YOU OF COHR! so that’s fun.A specific one I remember is “Garden Song” by Pete Seeger being a song that Cohr sings to themself as they work in the garden after settling down with Nothing.

ー☆* Two of Wands - has your character ever had to make a tough decision between two choices?

I mean, the Adamant choice in Dragon Age took them to a back alley and mugged them. (They ended up choosing Alistair. They can’t take one of Rion’s only close friends from him.)But in their “canon” in dnd-verse? hmmm. I think the thing that qualifies the most is when, after Nothing dies and Cohr sees a vision of him suffering in the Abyss, they have to decide whether to go down there to get him, thus risking both themself and the 

━━╋⊂ Five of Swords - what is the harshest thing your character has ever said?

Oh jeez. Cohr’s said some harsh shit. They regretted most of it immediately after. Honestly, it was probably something they said to Cillian, Nothing’s younger brother who hunted (and captured) him. Cohr tracked them back to Underwater, their hometown, and found Nothing tied to a pole in the square, placed there for the entertainment and ire of the townspeople who blamed his “curse” for their misfortune. It got Cohr angry. They saved him from that instance, and it got them brought before Cillian, where they sure said Some Shit, along the lines of “your parents were idiots to blame an innocent kid for all the shit they caused, and you’re an even bigger idiot for still eating up their shit after seeing how he’s literally nothing like what you were told.” That one they didn’t regret.

tarot-inspired asks