#code lerias

[watermelonolemretaw]

New pinned post! (warning: long)

Hi, I’m David, though I prefer to go by Watermelon online. My pronouns are they/them and he/him with no real preference. You might know me as Code Lerias or, formerly, Chickleader (both moreso brand names) and you also might recognize me from Foil on Canvas. I identify as a neoboy, and I’m ambiamorous, vincian and a sex-repulsed asexual.

I am a minor with Cerebral Palsy, though it’s not too debilitating physically outside of just making a few everyday movements a bit harder for me. Most of the effects are in my brain. I also have some kind of sound sensitivity, though I don’t have an official diagnosis or anything on what exactly it is. I have struggled with anxiety, depression and suicidal urges, but I’m doing relatively ok as of making this post. Also I have tulpas so that’s fun

I’d say my core belief is that you should be allowed to be whoever you want to be and do whatever you want with your life, as long as you’re not hurting anyone. If it’s something that makes you happy, go for it.

My other socials (kinda pointless, all my big stuff is on here)

My YT (barren) My Scratch (old) and My Wattpad (cringe)

Oh! Also, here's my Art Fight page!

My blogs:

@watermelonolemretaw - My main blog

@deltarune-reverse-twilight - My sideblog for my Deltarune AU

@askthestickghosts - An askblog that I started in a THSC hyperfixation and abandoned almost immediately

People I like:

@burntmarshmallowqueen - Person I’m in a band with

@milojoyceedgarraven - Her funny cat sideblog

@susannewartist - Close friend and artist

@starrz-n-waffl3-fries - irl bestie, sick art

@my-gender-is-fox - Tulpas that I helped make a blog for, not very active

@samanthagoestorestaurants - Cool food critic lol

Some of my mutuals:

@sadpurpleblood @spinosauruswithwings @silelda @fluxxdog @nerdypagan1 @foxgirl87 @auradastler @feral-furby-nitemare @idkmansmth @olithewaterdemon @annabel184 @petrifyingvellichorapophany

Cool posts with me in them:

Band announcement (!!)

My Deltarune AU (og pinned post)

My absurdly detailed Clue AU

An old asexual shitpost

A few of my favorite things

Yo can you draw a cat that likes waffles

The famed alphabet post (we got to Z!!!)

If you can’t run home to a home you love

Only Murders shitpost that should not have blown up this much

A weirdly in-depth Wheatley analysis

Mangle’s origin story

DRRT name change & blog announcement

askthestickghosts announcement

My first ever post (it’s just the first page of DRRT lol)

[musicfast]

THUNDERDOME BEST OF ´96 - FULL ALBUM 231:07 MIN - 1996 HD HQ HIGH QUALITY CD 1 + CD 2 + CD 3

TRACKLIST UNDER THE CUT

TRACKLIST CD 1 01 Dj Dano - Something Bigger (Here We Go Again Mix) 00:00 02 Mike Ink & The Chain Of Brotherhood - Lovely Ugly Brutal World 03:20 03 The Prophet - The Techno God (Hell Remix) 07:00 04 Scarface - Speedy Gonzales 10:33 05 NIP Collective - Weekend 14:05 06 Control DC - Ritmo Del Diavolo 17:35 07 Human Resource - Fuck Them 21:07 08 Simstim - One Hundred Two Hundred 24:10 09 The Dreamteam - 3 Tha Hard Way 27:37 10 Lenny Dee - RAW 31:04 11 T.O.P.D.R.O.P - Achtung (Speedcity Remix) 34:16 12 The Dreamteam - Live In Tilburg (Team Spirit) 37:48 13 Dano - Welcome To The Thunderdome 41:20 14 Mutoid - Necronomicon 44:46 15 Mexamix - Intro 47:55 16 Ramirez - Terapia 48:11 17 Kuandra - La Onda 50:23 18 Dj Hooligan - B.O.T.T.R.O.P. 51:21 19 Yves De Ruyter - Rave City 53:09 20 Thunderball - Bonzai Channel One 55:08 21 Swat - The Fly Is Dead 56:55 22 Michael - White Line Cocaine 58:41 23 Dj Bountyhunter - Demillitarized Zone 1:00:50 24 Buzz Fuzz - D-Leria 1:01:52 25 Jean Sibart & Joel Trambel - Right Is Wrong 1:04:28 26 English Muffin - Blood Of An English Muffin 1:07:11 27 3 Steps Ahead - Motherfuckers You´re Gonna Die 1:07:58 28 Dr. Mindfuck - Beine 1:09:49 29 The Prophet - Dominatin 1:11:35 30 Riot Sqaud - Nonshlen Tustokken (Ode To Vortex) 1:13:14 31 Outro 1:14:55 

TRACKLIST CD 2 01 Dj Lancinhouse Meets The Stunned Guys - Cold´s Getting Bigger 1:15:13 02 3 Steps Ahead - Drop It (Original Mix) 1:18:47 03 Lockjaw - Ruff´n Ruggin 1:22:24 04 Marc Smith - The Mad One 1:25:41 05 Dj Isaac - Bad Dreams - (Remix) 1:29.00 06 Scoot Brown Meets Dj Paul - Cheese´n Beats 1:32:11 07 Body Lotion II - Make Your Dance 1:36:02 08 Dj Waxweazle & Guitar Rob - This Is How It Started 1:39:31 09 Dj Weirdo & Dj Phil Omanski - Young Birds 1:43:00 10 Private Productions - Looped (Mix) 1:46:15 11 Buzz Fuzz - Pump Up The Bass 1:49:20 12 Dj Sim - Straight Of The Dance Floor 1:52:35 13 Wasting Program - Jazz Sacrilege 1:55:55 14 The Washington Affair - Should I Say Fuck It 1:59:08 15 Megamix - Intro 2:03:13 16 Bertocucci Feranzano - XTC Love 2:03:28 17 Vanugenth The 5Th - Pussycat 2:05:35 18 Predator - Mind Of A Lunatic 2:07:27 19 Diss Reaction - Jieehaaaa 2:09:17 20 Jeremy - Go With The Flow 2:10:30 21 Masoko Solo - Pessa Pessa 2:12:14 22 Dj Weirdo & Dj Sim - Go Get Busy 2:13:53 23 Dj Paul - Play Me Game  2:16:14 24 Gabbaheads - I´m A Thunderdome Baby 2:18:02 25 The Ender - Get Me Sexy 2:20:10 26 The Scotchman - Get Busytime 2:21:53 27 Technohead - I Wanna Be A Hippy 2:23:47 28 Critical Mass - Psychotic Break (Lenny Dee Mix) 2:25:20 29 3 Steps Ahead - Hardcore 2:27:36 30 The Prophet - House Time 2:29:52 31 Ralphie Dee - Mad As Hell 2:31:09 32 Outro 2:33:13 

TRACKLIST CD 3 01 Dj Delirium - & Guitar Rob - The Way We Rocked It (Live In N.Y.C.) 2:37:01 02 Miss Groovy - Jungle Sickness 2:40:53 03 Duo Pennotti - Addicted 2 Raves (Buzz Fuzz Mix) 04 Dj Weirdo & Dj Delirium - Open Your Eyez! 2:45:00 05 Baba Nation - Jesus Words 2:48:46 06 Dj E-Rick & Tactic - Our House Is Your House 2:52:51 07 Dj Delirium & Buzz Fuzz - Immortaly 2:55:56 08 Kool Killers - Back Watcher 2:59:02 09 Dj Jordens - Please Pai 3:01:53 10 Dj Buzz Fuzz - Chemical Overdrive 3:04:55 11 Dj Paul - Code Red 3:07:50 12 Demonax - Hardcore Power 3:10:52 13 Dominion - Natural Born Killer 3:14:30 14 The Controllers - In Control, In Effect 3:17:54 15 Megamix - Intro 3:21:07 16 Naked Steel - Viva La France 3:21:30 17 The New York Terrorist - Short Fuse 3:23:06 18 Dj Weirdo & Dr. Phil Omanski -Young Birds 3:24:37 19 Nitrogen - Bad Boy 3:26:46 20 Chosen Few - Name Of The Dj 3:28:33 21 Dj Rob - Loud And Proud 3:30:35 22 3 Steps Ahead - Gabbers Unite 3.32:21 23 Dj Rob - The Beat Is Flown 3:34:31 24 Rotterdam Terror Corps - You´re Dealing With 3:36:14 25 Trancehistory - Doo-Dey (Dj Dione Remix) 3:37:57 26 3 Steps Ahead - Drop It 3:40:36 27 Miss Groovy - Search And Destroy 3:42:28 28 Carlos Masserati - Get On The Move 3:44:01 29 Rob Gee - Ecstacy You Got What I Need 3:46:21 30 Body Lotion - Happy Is Voor Hobo´s 3:48:32 31 3 Steps Ahaed / Outro - In The Name Of Love 3:49:58 

[zpomnicore]

Bareback at Bremen

--- Today’s TMJ 4 Live at 5 Riverwest News Broadcast Four Tet - LA Trance Pole - Rondell Einz Daed - Light Project Pole - Tanzen Blaze feat. Palmer Brown (Derrick Carter Mix) Hitori Tori - Thas Pressure Hitori Tori - Sacki Villa Amelie Lens - Hypnotized (Joyhauser remix) David Zowie - House Every Weekend DJ Funk - House the Groove DJ Chip - Bang Skeet DJ Funk - Booty Clap Thomas Bangalter - Club Soda Thomas Bangalter - Outrun Da Hool - Met Her at the Love Parade Otto Von Schirach - Mind Power Dave Clarke - Red 3 (Thunder) Purple Disco Machine - Something About Us Thomas Bangalter - What To Do Thousand Fingers - Down (Mijo Remix) Don’t Take More (Jamie Liddell Remix) Mark Blair - This is Acid, Man The Subjects vs. Jeff Mills - Dark Matter Shake What Ya Mama Gave Ya DJ Nephets - I Came to Bring The Pain Eprom - Daemon Veil DJ Anonymous - Sink My Brain Luke Vibert - 165 303 DJ Anonymous - Floor To The Dorr Claptone - Heartbeat DJ Funk - Every Freakin’ Day Miss Kitten & The Hacker - 1982 (Vitalic Remix) Spandauer Hardbass - 100,000 Abonnenten Special Salvatore Ganacci - Horse DJ Promo - Patterns in the Chaos KRTM - Dismissed Warmducher - hardcore will never die Rotator - No Surrender Flume - Wall Fuck Doormouse - HARDCORE WILL NEVER DIE (RUFF EDIT) KRTM - Horsepowder Disintegrator - Lock on Target B.O.B. - Strange Clouds (Instrumental) Adam X - Chemical Spill Buzz Fuzz - D-Leria KRTM - Chaser Monkey With a Shotgun 808 State - Flow Coma (AFX Remix) DakhaBrakha - Tataryn Pole - Fahren Getter - Ripper Technical Itch - Heavy Metal Squarepusher - 4001 Kodak Black - Zeke (Instrumental) Stazma - Stazejfbdnedrkjb Dust Devil - D-Code (The Adult Swim Theme) Omyiga - The Perfect Year For Another End Travis Scott - Beast Mode (Instrumental) Elton John loop Nasenbluten - Dash N.W.A. - Appetite For Destruction (Instrumental) Doormouse - For Mama’s Ed Sheeran - Don’t (Instrumental) Igorrr & Ruby My Dear - Barbecue Squarepusher - Come on My Selector Ruby My Dear - Kismet (Dub Version) The Weekend - The Hills (Instrumental) DJ Tron - Demon Doormouse -Keishaka Core Doormouse - Cult of AOL Doormouse - Dolomite Today’s TMJ 4 Live at 5 Riverwest News Broadcast

[eeraygun]

Top 285 Sonic Releases of 2018

000. Rosalia - El Mal Querer 001. Various Artists - 'I Could Go Anywhere But Again I Go With You' 002. Autechre - NTS Sessions 003. Various Artists - Kulør 001 004. Oneohtrix Point Never - Age Of (Japanese Edition) 005. Sophie - Oil of Every Pearl's Un-Insides 006. Tirzah - Devotion 007. Blawan - Wet Will Always Dry 008. Cam Deas - Time Exercises 009. Leon Vynehall - Nothing Is Still 010. Ingus Baušķenieks ‎ - Spoki 011. Clouds - Heavy The Eclipse 012. Kyo & Jeuru - All The Same Dream 013. Topdown Dialectic - Topdown Dialectic 014. Snail Mail - Lush (remaster) 015. Pavel Milyakov - Eastern Strike 016. Robyn - Honey 017. Falcon Black Ops - Vol. 1 018. CTM - Red Dragon 019. Ariana Grande - Thank You Next 020. Robert Lippok - Applied Autonomy 021. Various Artists - LACKRec. vs. Magic Power 022. Henning Christiansen - The Executioner 023. Against All Logic - 2012-2017 024. Scandinavian Star - Solas 025. Happa - PT3.2 026. Prime Minister of Doom - Mudshadow Propaganda 027. Ciara - Dose 028. Joy Orbison - 81b 029. Drew McDowall - The Third Helix 030. Felix Blume - Death in Haiti: Funeral Brass Bands & Sounds From Port au Prince 031. Teyana Taylor - K.T.S.E. 032. Borai & Denham Audio - Club Glow Vol. 1 033. Demdike Stare - Passion 034. Christian Zanési - Grand Bruit - Stop! l'horizon 035. DJ Healer - Nothing 2 Loose 036. Suzanne Ciani - Quadraphonic LIVE 037. Amnesia Scanner - Another Life 038. Various Artists - BROR08 039. Joy O & Ben Vince - Transition 2 - Systems Align 040. Lamin Fofana - Brancusi Sculpting Beyonce 041. ACT! - Universalist 042. Randomer - HS002 043. Vladimir Dubyshkin - Cheerful Pessimist 044. Hugo Massien - Almost Becoming Lucid 045. Barker - Debiasing EP 046. CLUBKELLY - GLOBAL 93 047. Ron Morelli - Disappearer 048. Jenny Hval - The Long Sleep 049. Tierra Whack - Whack World 050. Chambray - Nectar of Joy 051. Deben Bhattacharya - Paris to Calcutta: Men and Music on the Desert Road 052. Stef Mendesidis - Klockworks 23 053. Various Artists - Running Back Mastermix 054. Andrea - Forse 055. François Bayle - Tremblements... LP 056. Childish Gambino - This Is America 057. Efdemin - Naïf 058. Skee Mask - Compro 059. Cardi B - Invasion of Privacy 060. 700 Bliss - Spa 700 061. Chontane - Red Island EP 062. Honnda - Maraschino Mic Drop 063. Martyn Bootyspoon - Silk Eternity 064. Objekt - Cocoon Crush 065. Addison Groove & Bim Sanga Present Bags Inc. - Dance Trax, Vol. 17 066. Puce Mary - The Drought 067. Gonçalo F Cardoso - Impressões de uma Ilha (Unguja) 068. EQD - Equalized #008 069. Félicia Atkinson - Coyotes 070. Low - Double Negative 071. The Mistys - Pregnant Mannequin 072. Adlas - Arrival by Air 073. Vainqueur - Reductions 1995–1997 074. Xzavier Stone - THIRST 075. Kelman Duran - 13th Month 076. Lyra Valenza - Scan, Deliver 077. Bjarki – Oli Gumm 078. Answer Code Request - Gens 079. Forward Strategy Group - East Port Rangers EP 080. Voronoi - Vis-Viva 081. Olsen - Dream Operator 082. Mih-Ty - MIH-TY 083. Textasy - Dallas Gun Club 084. D.Dan - Covert Operation 085. Ursula K. Le Guin & Todd Barton - Music and Poetry of the Kesh 086. Duran Duran Duran - Choose Death 087. Jean C. Roché - Oiseaux Du Birds Of Venezuela 088. Vanessa Rossetto - Fashion Tape 089. Domiziano Maselli - Ashes 090. Smerz - Have fun 091. The Body - I Have Fought Against It, But I Can't Any Longer 092. Grizzle – Quinine 093. Rkss - DJ Tools 094. SHXCXCHCXSH - OUFOUFOF 095. Perfume - Future Pop 096. Stefano Moretti - Land of Mikuni 097. Sim Hutchins - Clubeighteen2thirty 098. Yves Tumor - Safe in the Hands of Love 099. Martyn - Voids 100. Sophia Loizou - Irregular Territories 101. Fracture - Soundboy Get Nervous 102. ABSOLUTE. - Malfunction 103. Diptera - 001 (antenna) 104. Nathan Micay - Whities 017 105. Alex Kassian - Hidden Tropics 106. The-Dream - Menage a Trois Sextape 107. Regal - Still Raving 108. Fumu - Sinuate 109. Evol - Ideal Acid 110. Various Artists - Only Promo Ma Poule 111. Mariah Carey - Caution 112. Ian Isiah - Shugga Sextape (Vol. 1) 113. Marie Davidson - Working Class Woman 114. Aoud - SE MKII 115. Konrad Wehrmeister - 5050 116. The Advent - Klockworks 22 117. Lucy Railton - Paradise 94 118. Virtual Self - Ghost Voices (Raito Remixes) 119. BE3K - Exoneration 120. GALT Faculty - E B O W 121. Art Alfie - The Bo Allan EP 122. Pendant - Make Me Know You Sweet 123. DJ Boring & Frits Wentink - Wasted Years of Pumping Iron 124. Contactless - Static 125. Was A Be & Synth Ethics - Systems 011 126. Helena Deland - From the Series of Songs Altogether Unaccompanied Vol. I 127. Freddie Gibbs - Freddie 128. Tessela & Lanark Artefax - Blue 01 129. Erma Grid - From a Band of Thoughts That Ended My Year 130. Dold - Mother EP 131. Eartheater - Irisiri 132. Age Coin - She Who Sold Me Told Me 133. Agrippa - Mygraine Urgraine/Harbour Run 134. Shame - Songs Of Praise 135. Severin - Safe Following Distance 136. RAMZi - Phobiza vol. 3: Amor Fati 137. Yen Towers - First on Comedown 138. Ludwig A.F. Röhrscheid - Xhale 139. Tee Mango - #2 140. Swarm Intelligence - Against The Dying Light 141. Céline Gillain - Bad Woman 142. Repro - Feel Extraordinary 143. Gila - Shedskin Pt.33 144. Jan Nemecek - Recurrences 145. Various Artists - Midnight in Tokyo Vol. 2 146. Various Artists - HYS001 147. No Moon - Infinite Dreamz EP 148. Prayer - Vital 149. Cadans - Slit EP 150. D. Tiffany - Feel U 151. The Empire Line - Rave 152. DJ Seinfeld - Sakura 153. 3KZ - A Love Supreme 154. Overlook - Never Understand 155. Ligovskoï - Esam 156. FJAAK - Havel 157. Scalameriya - Hellzone Megapunk EP 158. Drake - Scorpion 159. Locked Club - Svoboda 160. Young Echo - Young Echo 161. Reeko & Jonas Kopp - Realidades Holográficas I Torre de Babel 162. Hiro Kone - Pure Expenditure 163. Bruce - Sonder Somatic 164. Arkajo - Avasarala 165. TML - I Need An Exit 166. Thom Yorke - Suspiria 167. Various Artists - EDITSELECT36 168. Patrick Siech - Our Exile 169. Lucrecia Dalt - Anticlines 170. Qnete - Shtum 018 171. Future & Juice WRLD - WRLD ON DRUGS 172. Demian Licht - Female Criminals Vol. 3 173. Veronica Vasicka - in silhouette 174. 999999999 - RAVE REWORKS 175. Azari - Gotasoul 176. Varg - Nordic Flora Series Pt. 5: Crush 177. Mount Eerie - Now Only 178. Rabit - Bricks in a Draught 179. Elad Magdasi - Liquid Dreams 180. Tomas Urquieta - Dueños de Nada 181. The Higher - The Core 182. Ross Birdwise - Drunk Formalism(s) 183. Alan Fitzpatrick - System Addict 184. H4L - Four Lights 185. John Maus - Addendum 186. L-Vis 1990 - 12 Thousand Nights: Club 187. BLD - For Rave Use Only 188. Various Artists - Don’t You Mess with Cupid, 'Cause Cupid Ain’t Stupid 189. Ksmisk - Mikrometeorittene 190. Mark Leckey - Exorcism Of The Bridge @ Eastham Rake 191. Ross from Friends - Squaz 192. Rae Sremmurd - SR3MM-Jxmtro-Swaecation 193. Ricardo Villalobos - Silent EP 194. Young Thug - Slime Language 195. Phobia NL & Blacksun - Crossfire EP 196. X-Coast - XTC 197. Asymptote - Belief System 198. Ambivalent & Alden Tyrell - Detente 199. Christine and the Queens - Chris 200. Big Miz - Build-Destroy 201. Locked Groove - From Beyond 202. A$AP Rocky - TESTING 203. Paranorman - FUD001 204. Subradeon - Walking Through Motown EP 205. LMajor - Dig the New Breed, Pt. 1 206. P.Leone - The My Lita Project 207. P€PA & Z$OLI - Pzs_Rave 208. Adryiano - Dreams With EP 209. Appleblim - Life in a Laser 210. Vril - Omniverse EP 211. Бassae - Untitled 212. Gabber Eleganza – Never Sleep #1 213. Senyawa - Sujud 214. Radial - Tympana 215. N1L - 山卂ㄒ乇尺 爪乇爪ㄖ尺ㄚ 216. Dibek & Lodig - Lap.AM 217. Jonny Greenwood - Phantom Thread 218. Urulu - Foreign Depths 219. David Goldberg - EMO Serialism 220. DJ Different - Permission 2 Dance 221. Prg_m - Berytus Groan 222. Funeral Future - Hard Candy EP 223. Voiski - Sick Parrots 224. serpentwithfeet - soil 225. Company - Prosody 226. Stanislav Tolkachev - Champions Breakfast 227. Asquith - The Conditioning Track 228. Awdha - UNO 229. Dedekind Cut - Tahoe 230. Harrison BDP & Garth James - Vapour Trails EP 231. Sugar - No Sex Only Feelings 232. Duppy Gun Productions - Miro Tape 233. Mike Davis - Communique From an Absent Future 234. Cabasa - Uncle Sigmund's EP 235. Various Artists - Eel Behaviour: Sniper 236. Silicon Scally - Live at Scand 237. E-Talking & Laksa - Blue 04 238. Jacquees - 4275 239. Marcel Dettmann - Test-File 240. Acre - Hollow Body 241. #.4.26. - MDR 24 242. Blood Orange - Negro Swan 243. Various Artists - Bavarian Stallion Series 003 244. Developer - Off Grid EP 245. 90 Process - No Warehouse Needed 246. Sector Y - CS_TMS 247. Charli XCX - Focus & No Angel 248. Paula Temple & Eomac - ETXC001 249. Cassius Select - Fake Death 250. hekla - Á 251. UNIIQU3 - Phase 3 252. Sedvs & Peel - The Plf Sessions I 253. Yugen - Ineffable 254. Europa - Alpanya 255. LSDXOXO - BODY MODS 256. Roper Rider - Motion Profile 257. Forest Drive West - Un 258. Petar Dundov - Dalmatina & Once We Were Here 259. Desiigner - L.O.D. 260. Renick Bell - Wary 261. Nicki Minaj - Chun-Li 262. Locked Club - ЛОМАЙ EP 263. Dopplereffekt - Athanatos 264. Glaskin - Grey Lines 265. Beta Librae - Subspecies 266. Oisel - Entroterra EP 267. Conforce - Zero Point-Field 268. Raito - One Step Beyond 269. Hioll - Hioll 002 270. Various Artists - AEX005 271. Rune Bagge - Pink Dreams 272. Tensal - Industrialsociety EP 273. Mathias Schaffhaeuser - Love Idol 274. Notzing - 014 275. Michal Wolski - Still Life 276. Aphtc - When Grounds Shift 277. DJ Sneak - 3D Print 278. Bylly - Mouth Full of Sand 279. CUB - Seeing From Above 280. Farrago - Risin' 281. Amotik ‎– Amotik 009 282. D-Leria - Driving to Nowhere 283. The Cyclist - Alabaster Thrones 284. Roza Terenzi & DJ Zozi - Planet Euphorique

[chaied]

     Obi-Wan was left alone with Anakin. At last it was time for him to speak to his Padawan. Yet he could not find the right words. He knew, glancing at his Padawan's eager face, that Anakin meant well from the bottom of his heart. If Obi-Wan saw a shadow on that heart, he knew it would pain his Padawan to know it. In many ways, Anakin was still a boy. A wounded, loving, anxious boy with great gifts he did not fully understand.      Yet he was also a young man, close to maturity, who could do great harm. To others, yes. To himself, most of all.      "They were going to conduct a raid on Andara," Anakin said, tired of Obi-Wan's silence. "But first they were going to kill me — "      "I know," Obi-Wan said. "Everything was on Gillam's datapad. Which you would have known if you had searched for Ferus."      Anakin flushed. "I didn't know where he was."      "You did not look."      "I thought perhaps he was on leria or Andara. I thought the secret squad knew where he was — "      "You did not even look!" Obi-Wan shouted. "Your fellow Jedi was missing, and you did not even look!"      "I thought it best to continue under cover," Anakin said. His face showed his surprise at Obi-Wan's harshness. Obi-Wan never raised his voice. "I had infiltrated the squad. I thought my best chance of finding both Gillam and Ferus was to continue."      "You were willing to participate in a raid that would have started a war," Obi-Wan continued. He had to struggle to keep his voice level. He needed to keep as calm as possible.      "I didn't know about the raid!" Anakin protested. "I mean, I knew they were going to do something, but it was a dry run, designed to show the Andarans that they had the capability of invading their airspace. I didn't know they had plans to destroy their fleet. As soon as I did, I sabotaged the laser cannons."      "Anakin, you left your fellow Jedi imprisoned and went off on a mission with a group of beings who you had no reason to trust," Obi-Wan said. "You were wrong at every point. Can't you see that?"      Anakin said nothing."You did not contact me to tell me Ferus was missing—"      "I would have compromised our cover — "      "You had a responsibility!" Obi-Wan's voice cut like a laser whip. "Just as I had one to Siri. You betrayed me and the Order by your actions. And your inability to see that troubles me the worst of all."      "I am sorry, Master."      Obi-Wan shook his head. Grief rose in him "Those are words you speak so easily, Padawan."      Anakin's mouth closed in a line. "I don't know what you want from me."      Honesty. Loyalty. Patience. Obedience. Obi-Wan thought these things but did not say them. Because, after all, they were only words, too.      "I can only show you the path," Obi-Wan said. "You must choose to walk on it."      "I just…" Anakin stopped. He took a ragged breath. "I thought you would be proud of me."      I am proud of you. Obi-Wan wanted to say the words. They were true. He was proud of so much in Anakin. But now was not the time to tell him that.      Or was it?      Help me, Qui-Gon.      But no matter how hard Obi-Wan listened, he could not hear the quiet wisdom of his Master. And now it was too late. Siri returned and signaled to him. It was time to go.      "I will take this matter up with the Council," he said. "Of course,"      Anakin said. "The Council. We can't take a step without it."      "That's enough!" Obi-Wan snapped. "Come. The others are waiting."      Anakin hesitated. The set of his mouth was stubborn.      "Come, Padawan." Obi-Wan's tone rang with authority. Anakin's hesitation cast a chill on his heart.      Anakin followed him. Obi-Wan did not glance back again.      He felt shaken. Did Anakin understand that he had violated an essential part of the Jedi code? Did he know he had broken something between them? He had not fully trusted Obi-Wan. And so Obi-Wan had lost his trust in him.      Not for good, he tried to reassure himself. And maybe not for long.      Still, his step was heavy as he climbed up the loading ramp of the transport. His anger faded. Left behind was a feeling he was not used to experiencing. It was fear.

                             - Jedi Quest: The School of Fear, Jude Watson

END ME NOW !!!! @jedichosen tagging sari because she needs to feel my pain.