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cloverdaisies · 2 years ago
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MEDIA STUDIES: KIM SUNWOO
this document contains a letter to the pretty boy who sits quietly in the back of a poorly lit media studies classroom. ☆*:.。.
song recommendation : photosynthesis- sunwoo
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☆*:.。. ☆*:.。. .。.:*☆☆*:.。. .��.:*☆o .。.:*☆☆*:.。. .。.:*☆
LETTER ONE:
MONDAY 5TH JUNE 2007
hi pretty boy,
your sweet peach lips, and chocolate brown eyes seemed to have fell dull today. it irked me to ignore your sad state and pitiful expressions, despite having never interacted with you before now. you always sit at the back of the class, huddled as far back into the corner as humanly possible. you nervously chew on your pencil a lot and enjoy spinning the thinned wood between your two fingers. you smell of a woody-spicy accord every time you breeze past, a scent that is both unfamiliar yet powerful in evoking the warm explosion of butterflies and bees in my stomach.
your smile is full, bright and unavoidably noticeable as it spreads from ear to ear it’s a rare sight now since something in your timeline has shifted. you seem to be aching, in your oversized hoodies and frowned expressions - i wonder what had destroyed the beautiful boy who usually sits peacefully amid his own daydreams. Your voice was deep and smooth, one that could sing any woman to sleep, you looked like you drank black coffee and smoked cigarettes off your balcony every morning. your face screamed a palette of romance, you looked like the lead in a romance novel like the boy who rescues the princess in a fairytale-
“what are you writing?” the girl sat next to me cranes her neck over my page as she tries to read the contents of the page in front of me
“nothing to do with you clearly.” i retorted, scrumpling the page and discarding it in the small trash can towards the back of the class.
the bell sounded to mark the end of class, i left with a slight pink tint on my cheeks as i made short eye contact with the brown eyed boy at the back.
WEDNESDAY 7TH JUNE 2007
media was always a lesson that flew by pretty quickly, considering my only assignments were to analyze music videos and watch movies it wasn’t too difficult and time seemed to just fly by when i had little work to do.
whilst practicing my handwriting out of sheer boredom, i reached to take a sip of my iced caramel latte i’d bought from the local coffee shop shortly before class before i felt a small object hit the back of my head and then bounce back onto the floor next to my desk.
i looked behind me with a look of sheer confusion to see the pretty boy from the back of my class, who didn’t have a name to my knowledge, chuckle at me mischievously.
with a nervous and reluctant smile back, i picked up the scrumpled piece of note paper he pointed to beside me, his hands hidden in the cuffs of his grey hoodie.
in messy handwriting the paper wrote:
hi pretty girl,
thank you for the compliments, your bright eyes and blissful smile seem to have caught my eye too. but don’t be embarrassed i noticed you tend to go all pink in your cheeks and shakey whenever something mildly nerve-wrecking happens to you.
thank you for noticing i haven’t been doing well lately, it makes me feel better to have someone notice. do you wanna go get coffee later? i also noticed you buy one before class everyday.
add me to your contacts, my number is: ***************
btw my name is sunwoo, i’d love to know yours.
☆*:.。.。.:*☆☆*:.。. .。.:*☆☆*:.。. .。.:*☆
small lil fluff to aid your wednesday evening and hopefully make you feel a lil better !
please ask me some questions with the questions feature! i really wanna use it
sending my love always, wherever you are in the world <3
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chaniiverse · 9 months ago
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any good chanhee fics that you recommend? there isnt a lot of new biased peopel
Oh my. I love this ask so much! As a channie girlie there really is so less fics of my man 😭. It physically hurts but I re-read so manyyyy of the ones which are out there.
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Simple gifts: by @sungbeam
This is like the first ever fluff (?) I read of Chanhee which stuck to me. I literally went to Beam’s DMs crying to her about this fic because I just love this so much 😭. I did not stop thinking about this fic for WEEKS especially the line “I am lonely but not when you’re here” it’s just so Chanhee coded!
That’s him, that’s just who he is: by @from-izzy
The first ever fic Izz wrote and that also for ME! Yes people, it’s for me 🥺🫶🏻. When I was reading this I literally started balling my eyes out because of how sad it was. I even sent a pic of me crying too Izz 😭💀. It’s not everyday you’d find a fic about the struggles my man went through and Izz literally depicted it all so well :)
The warmest winter: by @from-izzy
The roller coasters of ride izz went through when riding this fic was so 😭🥲. She really gave it her all when writing this sweet thing and she did not disappoint us Chanhee lovers because she ate AND served 💪. Tbh this fic is just so pure 🥺 the way chani gets jealous of Juyo (I love jealous men and I kid you not I am a possessive chani believer) made me want to bang my head against the wall SHSHSHSHSHS
Redemption of love: by @winterchimez
You guys don’t know how much I love this series 😔. I have never watched any musicals (NOT MY FAULT NOTHING LIKE THAT IS IN MUMBAI OKAY??) but I genuinely saw this one clip (it was in the first chapter of this fic) of the chandelier falling and oh my the way I was like “I NEED TO WATCH THIS MUSICAL!?” But not only do I love this fic because it’s Chanhee but also because ik how much this means to Als 🥺🫶🏻.
Even if the world caves,: by @kimsohn
Yall shru wrote this fic for me and me only and I will die while holding this fic close to my heart because it means a lot to me and I love this very much just the way I love my shru. The way I went through so many different emotions while reading this fic 😭. Like omg I get enemies2lovers AND a cameo of Vernon?? It’s a good day to die yeah? You guys have to read this fic written by shru ASAP!
# ur such an emo!: by @cloverdaisies
I will never shut up about the fic written by clo because they’re just so magical and makes me want Chanhee more than ever. Tbh this was such a surprise for me when clo said she wrote a fic for me 🥺. I already knew that she was busy with her work and all and then she just goes “Sana I wrote a Chanhee fic for your birthday.” Out of nowhere and me just sitting there balling my eyes out because 🥺🫶🏻. And then again we love enemies2lovers in this household especially when it comes to Chanhee so yes. We love this fic dearly.
Black hearts: by @cloverdaisies
The way clo depicted all the prompts given by me and @winterchimez in this fic has me on chokehold ngl 😭. I went to sleep after talking with ally and clo and then when I woke up BOOM BAM POW Clo had posted it already. I lowkey screamed when I saw this and the way it literally has all of our biases in this fic 🥺😭. Side note: I miss our lil trio yall 😭🥺. Late night chats again when 😭.
Valentines win: by @strayed-quokka
Omg my lenlen 🥺🫶🏻. She dedicated this one for me. Ha! *flips hair* be jealous 😍🫵. I was smiling like crazy when reading this fic of hers tho, the way Chanhee was like “no I am going to win this for you. I am not gonna back out” made my heart melt 🥺. Because we all know Chanhee is not a sporty type of person so him trying to win this just made me want to bash my head against the wall 😭🤧. And the fact that it was a POKÉMON SOFT TOY MADE IT MORE BETTER SISJDJDJ.
Chanhee with a girly gf: by @astrae4
If I don’t mention this one it’d be a serious crime and I do not want to go in jail 😭😢. This is the first ever work i read of Gill (that’s a lie. The first one was the channie smau) and this literally made me giggle so much 😭🥺. It has been a while since I read this again but we love this fic a lot 💪
Lipstick stains: by @slytherinshua
This very fic of Chanhee made me fall in love with him even more. Like you don’t get this fic the way I do. It literally took me out of my writers slump 😭🤧. It literally made me want to read other fics again because it reminded me that there are still good writers out there who write for my man 😭🥺. And u get husband channie. What else do you want? Be fr 😭
Something blue: by @deobienthusiast
I was beta reading this fic for K and I divorced Sangyeon and married Chanhee instead. End of the story. I was literally balling my eyes out because no way in hell would I treat my best friend (why be a best friend when you can be my best boyfriend tho?) Chanhee the way the reader did 🙄. Like?? But I love how Chanhee still showed up to her wedding (wanna make it our wedding instead?) despite everything the reader said to him 😭.
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I think if you guys want a part two of this plz let me know 🥺🫶🏻. I would have added some smuts but idk if you’re a minor or an adult so 😭. In the part two (if you guys ever want it) imma add the ones I read on Wattpad too! (There’s only two but whatever)
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Here’s some Chanhee for a good day ahead!
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juyeonszn · 1 year ago
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BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT
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THE TBZ FRAT HOUSE IS HOSTING THE BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT COLLAB BY @juyeonszn AND @itsbeeble!
YOU’RE INVITED!
PAIRING tbz x f!reader
GENRES smut ﹒fluff ﹒minimal angst ﹒crack
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! mature language, mentions of alcohol, sexual content, more warnings per individual fic!
SUMMARY have you ever wondered what your favorite frat boyz are up to in their personal lives? if so, then these fics are just for you! join us as we take a glimpse into the tau beta zeta fraternity and see what they get up to in their free time!
MORE LETS GAURRRRR i’m so excited to announce this collab with loml reese both as a cute fun little idea we had and in celebration of her 1 year tumblr anniversary! we also realized it happened to be the same day as tbz day LOL so that’s kinda crazy 😭 my boyz have been here for 6 years wow 💔 anyways i hope all of u love these as much as we do! and always, don’t forget to rb if u enjoyed!! send an ask if u’d like to be tagged in these <3
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies
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FALL SEMESTER
TRY HARD — LEE JUYEON (12/6)
Need to get rid of some junk? Well these college hunks will haul YOUR junk! Give us a call at xxx-xxx-JUNK and we’ll haul YOUR junk for FREE! (limited time offer)
EXCITEMENT — JI CHANGMIN (12/6)
You know, when you told your girl friends that you’d never finished before, you were expecting it to blow over like no big deal. What you weren’t expecting was for it to spiral into a whole other mess.
SEEING STARS — KIM SUNWOO (12/10)
It’s slightly embarrassing how Sunwoo is naive enough to take Eric Sohn’s “advice” to heart. Luckily, you like idiots. Especially when they kick a ball into your face and agree to do a semester’s worth of school work for you.
CLUMSY — JU HAKNYEON (12/10)
When Haknyeon ran into you at a TBZ party for the first time, he didn’t think he would fall for you so quickly. Or literally. Or both simultaneously. But there’s a first time for everything, he supposes.
“FRIENDLY” COMPETITION — LEE SANGYEON (12/14)
The TBZ frat had always had a rivalry with the KAT sorority. At least, they did when you and Sangyeon became the presidents three years ago. What happens when you mix a little friendly competition into this rivalry of yours?
JE NE SAIS QUOI — JACOB BAE (12/14)
Jacob thought the concept of fraternities was stupid. So stupid that despite every single one of his friends being in one, he still refused to join. However, after meeting you at one of the TBZ parties, he’s starting to think maybe they’re not that horrible.
SPRING SEMESTER
LET LOOSE — KIM YOUNGHOON (12/19)
Younghoon has hated you. He thought you were stuck up with that better-than-you princess attitude of yours. What better than to just…fuck it right out of you?
(NO) STRINGS ATTACHED — LEE HYUNJAE (12/19)
Becoming friends with Lee Hyunjae after his valiant attempt to save your life (stopping you from drunk driving) was certainly not on your year’s bingo card. Also not on your bingo card? Waking up in his bed every other night following, but it’s not like you’re really complaining.
NO BITCHES? — ERIC SOHN (12/22)
When you met Eric, you’d thought he was just another frat boy, looking to get into any woman’s pants (particularly yours at that moment). You never would’ve thought that he was just a loser who really liked FNAF and just thought you were pretty.
PARTY O’CLOCK — CHOI CHANHEE (12/22)
In spite of being a frat boy himself, Chanhee could never actually see himself enjoying the luxuries of the title. Besides, how could he with all the responsibilities of being treasurer? Enter you and your carefree spirit and Chanhee’s got a real big problem on his hands.
PRINCESS AND THE PAUPER — KEVIN MOON (PT. 1 1/1, PT. 2 1/3)
It wasn’t like you and Kevin hated each other. In fact, you quite admired him despite his somewhat indifferent attitude toward you. Well, now that you’re paired up for the last dance of the year, you guess it’s the perfect time to find out why.
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© juyeonszn & itsbeeble. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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winterchimez · 1 year ago
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A New Beginning With You | Lee Juyeon
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SUMMARY: it has been a couple of years since you and your childhood best friend, Juyeon, went on your separate ways. Years later, you were given the opportunity to return to Seoul to pursue a new career, only to find out that your new employer is the one you have been dreading to see. Will you toss away all of the emotions again, or will you finally come to terms and fix this broken relationship with him?
PAIRING: ceo!Juyeon x f!reader
GENRE: office au, ex-childhood friends to lovers, coming of age, angst, fluff
WARNINGS: nc-17, slow-burn, this is pretty angsty ngl 😭, betrayal, several heart wrenching moments (it takes a while for both Juyeon and reader to figure out their emotions), language (one curse word), miscommunication, alcohol consumption, reader gets drunk a couple of times, several heated arguments, petnames (princess, sweetheart), kissing
WORD COUNT: 15,466
A/N: here is my submission for deoboyznet's holiday exchange event!! boo @cloverdaisies i'm your secret santa 🎅👀 ngl i did struggle with the prompts that you gave mainly cs i don't usually read/watch coming of age works so i hope i did this fic justice 🥹🥹🥹 big big shoutout to @momhwa-agenda for choosing the banner, also helping me to beta read (along with @from-izzy @juyeonszn) sending my unending kisses and hugs to all of you 😘💕
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Seven years ago 
“What do you mean you’re leaving?” 
It all just felt so sudden, and you weren’t sure if you were hallucinating as you heard those words that came out from the mouth of your best friend for the past seventeen years. You both have made a promise to one another since you both were in kindergarten that no matter how big or small the situation may be, you both will always have each other’s backs and that no secrets were to be kept from one another, even if they may feel like you have been punched right into the face during the aftermath of it all. 
Or that was what you thought. 
“Y/N…I had no control over anything…you do know how my father often has to travel across the globe for his job—”
“But that doesn’t change the fact that you decided to keep it a secret from me when you first discovered that you were potentially going to follow your father’s footsteps for his company.” 
From the beginning, you knew that Juyeon’s father worked at a relatively elite corporate company. Because of his status, he was often sent away to various countries to fulfill his job. It has been decades since his father has been in and out of Seoul, and he would often travel on his own not wanting to bother his family and wanting them to have a peaceful life here. 
Never in a million years would you have thought that he would bring his entire family along with him as he starts a new chapter in his life in the States, and also get Juyeon to follow in his father’s footsteps. 
You were on the verge of crying, your cheeks were heating up, and you had unintentionally balled up your fists, clearly failing terribly to suppress the anger and betrayal you felt. 
“I just don’t get it, Juyeon. You have always wanted to pursue basketball. Hell, you have even sought a sports scholarship to get into one of the prestigious universities in Seoul! Why are you giving up now?” You huffed. 
You could tell that he was showing some reluctance in his answer, and truthfully, he didn’t really know how to give you an answer, either. But he decided to reply in the most plausible and fitting one that was right for the current situation you both were in. 
“Family has to always come first, Y/N. If it were for my family's future, especially my stay-at-home mother and younger brother, I would do anything to ensure my father and I can provide for them.” 
You scoffed. “Bullshit.” 
You took a few steps forward until you were merely inches apart. Looking straight into Juyeon’s eyes, you could tell he felt the same way and was also trying to hold back his tears. 
“You’re not the Juyeon I know. My Juyeon, who has been right by my side ever since we were kids, would always go above and beyond to work for what he truly wants. He is never afraid to voice his opinion, and he would do anything to ensure his happiness would be fulfilled no matter the consequences.” 
Finally, the tears that you have held back for so long began dripping down your face as you began to hit him simultaneously on his chest.  
“What exactly happened to you, Juyeon?”
At the same time, tears clouded his vision as a single teardrop dripped onto his face. You could tell that something was holding him back from telling you the truth, if any, and his following answer would break you down even more.
“I’m sorry, Y/N.”
With that, a black car pulls up at the school entrance, revealing his younger brother rolling down the window to call out for his big brother. You could see multiple pieces of luggage lined up at the back trunk of the car, and they were ready to head straight to the airport. 
With a glance back to signal to his family that he would be coming shortly, he turned to you to apologise once more before gently pushing you away to leave.
“I’m really sorry, Y/N. I wish you all the best in your future as you enter university and eventually the workforce.” 
Just like that, Juyeon quickly sped down the stairs and opened the door to the car before settling in. Within seconds, his parents, sitting in the front seats, gave you a little wave before they drove away right through the exit. 
Almost instantly, all of the built-up tension was suddenly released from you all at once, and you finally broke down crying at the entrance of your high school. What you thought would be a memorable, happy graduation for you both as you parted ways with your youth years turned out to be one sad separation from your best friend. 
You both planned your summer holidays with one another before officially enrolling in university in the autumn. You were going to head to Busan for a five-day trip during the first month, going to visit your aunt who lived on the outskirts of Seoul to help her in her fieldwork (especially when she has a soft spot for Juyeon), and even going to visit all of the bazaars that were going to be held in central Seoul. 
There were so many potential activities and times you could have had with one another, and you were even planning to propose to Juyeon that you wanted to be more than just childhood friends. 
Because you have been having an insane crush on him since you were kids, and you realised it was love by the time you both entered high school.
Unfortunately, it was too late to confess your love to him, as he was now long gone, heading straight to the airport before he eventually said his final goodbye to his home for the past seventeen years, Seoul. 
Maybe it was fate that you both were just not meant to be with one another; perhaps it was why his father had no choice but to bring his whole family with him to start a new life in the States. 
For the first time, you cursed and blamed yourself for having such hope and planning a potential future with someone who was clearly out of your league, and you thought it had all been a waste of time since the beginning. 
With that, the little needle-felted cat you have been hiding and made last night was released from your grips as he fell towards the stairs and eventually towards the ground. As you noticed, more tears kept welling up in your eyes, and you brought both hands to cover your face, not wanting to care about anything right now. 
I shouldn’t have had so much hope. I was stupid enough actually to fall in love with you, Juyeon.
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Present Day 
“Oh, Y/N! Looks like your article just got published in the London Mail this morning!” 
Your co-worker gave you a little pat on the back before he placed the newspapers right onto your desk, and it was clear how your article was published right on the front page with your name written very obviously at the right corner. 
“Please, it was nothing. It’s what I do all the time,” you replied bluntly. 
“What do you mean it was nothing? You just interviewed the rising actor of the month! That’s big news, and you deserve to celebrate it!" 
“Please, it really is nothing—” 
“Hey everyone, our department needs a little night out after work at the local pub! We’re toasting to Y/N’s big break in the news today!” 
Your co-worker shouted out loud, and eventually, cheers erupted in the office, everyone congratulating you and thinking about the potential drinks and songs they would go for once work is over. 
You smiled and chuckled at the sight. You have always loved your job and are grateful to have met such a fantastic group of people in this company. 
It wasn’t your dream to pursue the path of becoming a reporter in the beginning. Sure, you have always had a passion for writing, but you have always considered it your hobby. Thanks to your sister, who was studying abroad in Manchester then, who convinced you to take that leap of faith and turn that hobby into a potential job. 
So here you were, living the best of your life. You followed your sister’s footsteps and went on to live abroad in the UK, enrolling in the University of Manchester, where you successfully graduated with honours the past year. Thankfully, you secured a place in the London Mail right after graduation due to your outstanding grades. 
The move from Manchester to London was a bit tough, but you initially managed to pull through with your sister and her boyfriend's help. They were kind enough to help you settle down and stayed with you for the first couple weeks before returning to Manchester. You miss your sister’s presence, but you know that eventually, you had to venture out on your own and face reality as an adult. 
It has been a year, and you have adapted to living alone. Often, things would get tough, but it was also thanks to you having such a fantastic team of colleagues that you were able to pull through it all, even when there were times you had to work overtime to fulfill all of the datelines that were pilling up nonstop, especially during the holiday seasons. 
It wasn’t until recently that your article was accepted and published on the main cover page of the news, and that was when you finally earned your big break after a year. The company has deemed you to be one of the most talented youngsters they have had over the past decade, and they were more than happy to have had you as their employee. 
Since then, things have settled down for you as you got a pay rise and had fewer hours to give you more time to rest well, mainly when you only survived with four to five hours of sleep daily. Now, you can eat your breakfast correctly and get a good seven to eight hours of sleep before coming every day. 
Just as your co-workers were having the time of their lives trying to figure out the plans for tonight after work, your office desk telephone rang, and you picked it up hastily, thinking that you’d have another big scoop to write about
But it was from the CEO. 
“Miss Y/N, please report to my office immediately.”
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You were back home after that fun night out at your local pub with your co-workers, holding a beer in hand as you FaceTime your sister over the phone. 
“Well, it’s a good opportunity for you, don’t you think, Y/N?” 
“I’m not too sure about all of this, sis. Like yeah, it would be great that I would be back home, but still—”
“Hey, I know mom would be ecstatic to have you back in Seoul with her. And it just so happened that you have been telling me how you recently began feeling a little homesick. I’d say it would be great for you to take up the offer.” She reassured. 
It was the moment your mouth fell open wide when you heard that you had been offered to be a senior reporter for one of Seoul’s top magazines at the moment, GQ Korea, where you would be interviewing potentially all of the current well-known celebrities in the country and getting a higher pay as well. 
It seems that they have come across your contributions from the London Mail, and they were keen to have you on their team. Your first thought was grateful as your works were recognised globally, but also because you miss being home. But another part of you has already settled in the UK, so you weren’t sure if leaving now would be the right choice. 
But now that your sister has given you some input, that was when you knew that it wouldn’t hurt to try it out, at the very least. 
With one final sip of your beer, you leaned forward and gave your sister a smile for the first time since calling her this evening. 
“I’m going home now, sis.”
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It has been a week since you settled into Seoul, and you have loved being back in your comfort zone: the culture, the food, and the environment you grew up in. 
Your mom was overjoyed as she picked you up from the airport, insisting she would take your luggage, especially when you have flown almost twenty-four hours just to get home. By the time you got home, your mom was already ready and prepared with all the dishes she had premade before your arrival and needed to heat them quickly. 
You quickly took a shower before joining her at the dining table. You both chatted for close to midnight before she told you she would sleep ahead of you. Meanwhile, you decided to clean up your childhood bedroom to make space for everything you brought back from London. 
There was this nostalgia as you entered your room; everything was still the same, exactly how you had left it when you left for the UK years ago. The same old blue painting on the wall, all your posters hung on them, even your favourite comic books that were still arranged nicely on your bookshelf. 
You could tell there wasn’t a speck of dust in the room, indicating that your mom must have cleaned it occasionally. You couldn’t help but sigh, thinking about all the hard work she always puts herself through. 
It took you a while to go through all your belongings, mainly because you were reminiscing as you looked at the pictures, books, and figurines scattered throughout your room.
It wasn’t until you came across a box tucked away at the corners of your room that you pulled them out towards the centre as you opened them up. 
And god, you wished you hadn’t done that. 
All the pictures and items contained memories you had with your past lover, Lee Juyeon. 
You paused momentarily before reaching out to pick up the first item on top of the box: a picture. 
It was taken when you both were in kindergarten. You were holding hands, wearing backpacks and little yellow helmets on your heads. You couldn’t help but smile at the sight; it was nostalgic and cute. 
Right after that, you took out a pair of bracelets right below the picture. It was a friendship bracelet that you both made during middle school. It was summer when you recently discovered the trend of making friendship bracelets, where you went straight to Juyeon’s house across the street, practically dragged him back to your house, and got him to make one with you. You giggled at the thought of how Juyeon was so lost at the time, having to come to you almost every five seconds to tell you that he had either lost a piece or was having trouble threading the beads through the string. 
When you thought it would all be good memories, you stumbled upon the one item you wished you would not have to see again.
The needle-felted cat you made for him on the night before graduation. 
Unbeknownst to you, your hands began to tremble as you took the cat into your hands, staring at it as the memories flashed back: how you would give this to Juyeon and tell him that you were ready to be more than just close friends, up to the point of how he suddenly announced to you that he was leaving for good. 
Slowly, you felt that your tears were beginning to well up in your eyes, and you quickly dumped all of the items back into the box and tucked them back in the corner, using a few items you had in your room, such as cardboard to block it completely out of sight. 
You were not ready to go through all of the roller coasters of emotion once again. 
Especially when deep down in your heart, you still had some feelings left for him. Even if you did not wish to admit it out loud.
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You stood outside the tall building as you tried your best to fix up the blazer that your mum insisted you put on for your big day. With your handbag and laptop, you gave yourself a deep breath before mentally preparing yourself that this would be your new workplace from now on. 
You looked to see the vast sign plastered outside the building: GQ Korea. You were definitely at the right place. It took you a few seconds to finally be able to take your very first steps into the building. Once you did, you were amazed at the astonishing art that filled the reception floor. It was a fashion and art magazine; after all, there was no doubt that the company's directors entailed such a choice of decorations to captivate everyone who walked into their building. 
You walked straight towards the counter, where you were greeted by two ladies who were already expecting your arrival. Immediately, they got you signed up in the system, and one guided you to one of the fifth floors, where you would be meeting your new team and department that you would be working with. 
As you were guided into the head of the department’s office, Ms Kim, who has been guiding and overlooking this particular department for the past five years, greeted you and made you feel comfortable instantly, which made all of your tensed-up muscles relax fairly quickly. She communicated well with you and, surprisingly, even shared some of the same ideals as you did. You were beyond grateful to hear when she mentioned that she has kept up with your works from the London Mail, and it was about time that the team needed someone like you. 
Once both of you had taken the time to break the ice, Ms Kim led you to your desk just outside her office, where countless cubicles filled the entire floor. At first glance, you have estimated that there were about fifty employees who worked in this department. It didn’t take them long to greet you personally before you eventually made your way to your desk in the middle of the floor. 
As you unloaded your bag of materials onto the desk and placed them in an organised manner, your hands digging through your bag finally stopped when you felt a familiar material. Instantly, you pulled it out to check what it was, and you were once again left speechless with what it was. 
A picture of you and Juyeon back during your graduation from high school.
The only plausible reason it was in your workbag was because of your mother. You have never once told her that things ended badly between you both, and you have always shrugged off the fact that you were still keeping in touch with the man himself and that you both were still having a healthy friendship. You just didn’t want her to worry much, especially when she knew how much you both have been through, and she practically treated Juyeon like her own son. 
As all loving mothers would do, she woke up hours ahead of you this morning to prepare you a filling bento box. She wrapped it with traditional cloth and placed it neatly into your work bag. At the same time, she probably put the little picture frame into the bag, hoping it would motivate you during work and decorate your new workplace. 
With just a few seconds of staring at it, you looked down to see an empty trash bin that sat right beneath your work desk, and without thinking much, you immediately placed the picture right into it. 
I’m sorry, mom. But I will not be needing it anymore.
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Your first week of work flew by quickly as you easily got used to the working lifestyle. Seoul was your home, and it wasn’t hard to adapt back to the culture. In fact, you were grateful that your new group of co-workers could be on par with the ones back in London; they were all as great and supportive in helping you ease into the new environment. Your new co-workers even encouraged you to head out for a little drink at the local izakaya restaurant after work since it has been a long weekend for everyone, and you surely did enjoy the little company you had before heading home a little after midnight. 
In terms of fitting in as GQ Korea's new reporter, it has been a thrilling ride learning about all of the entertainment biz that has been going on in the country. Since your forte was with celebrities, your head of department had assigned you the same, focusing on the rising K-Pop stars in the industry. 
It has been a while since you kept up with Korean celebrities since you mainly focused on Western artists abroad for a couple of years. But as you kept up with the news and made sure to read the newspaper first thing every morning you came right in, you made sure that you have been kept up to date with all of the latest announcements and events that have been going on in the industry. 
Today was a big day for you as Ms Kim had instructed you to head up to the top floor, where you would first meet up with the CEO for the very first time since joining the company as he would like to brief you through the details in regards to the celebrities that will be coming later in the day.
You thought it was probably some hotshot celeb for the CEO to personally guide you through each step regarding what or how you should deal with them. However, you weren’t too mad since you figured they probably did things differently here in Seoul.
As you finally reached the top floor, you were then escorted by whom you assumed to be the CEO’s personal assistant, who was already expecting your arrival as they kindly let your head department know that she was free to leave. The walk down the hallway towards the CEO’s office seemed a little daunting to you for some reason; perhaps it was also because you were meeting someone who is considered to be one of the famous people in the heart of Seoul—there’s a reason why GQ Korea is always on the top-selling markets. 
As the assistant kindly knocked on the door and got a verbal cue from the other side, she took a step behind to let you move forward as you slowly turned the doorknob to enter the room. 
Immediately, you notice how the entire office is decorated extravagantly, filled with tons of high-end decorations that suit the taste of the CEO himself. The wide, clear windows dominated most of the room, offering a panoramic cityscape view. A curated selection of artwork filled the walls, which added a little personal touch to the working space. 
You didn’t realise that your mouth was wide open as you slowly took in the mesmerising view until you turned towards the desk, where the CEO was sitting on his chair with his back facing you, flipping through multiple documents in his hands. 
As you slowly made your way towards him, your little footsteps made the CEO’s ears perk up, causing the man to stand up and finally turn to face you in person for the first time. 
With that, your entire world seemed to pause for a moment. 
What exactly was going on? There was no way this young man could be the CEO, especially when you were certain that he had left Seoul years ago and sworn that his chances of returning to his homeland would be close to zero. Your laptop in hand was slowly beginning to slip off before you were brought back to reality and quickly caught it before it eventually hit the ground. 
That was when you finally muttered your first words since stepping into the CEO’s office. 
“J-Juyeon…?” 
It was pretty evident that the man himself was just as confused and shocked as you were; he practically stood there motionless, trying his best to make sense of the current situation.
“Y-Y/N? What are you doing here?” 
“I should be the one asking you that,” you replied. 
You were about to go haywire just from this interaction alone. It was hard enough for you to move on from what happened seven years ago, and it proved to be a lot harder than you thought when you came back a few weeks ago to see that all of the things that you’ve tried so hard to forget were now back in the comforts of your bedroom. 
Ever since then, you had promised yourself that you wouldn’t want anything to do with Juyeon anymore, and you have decided to shut your heart regarding anything related to the man himself. 
If only it were easier said than done. 
Juyeon finally took his first step away from his desk as he slowly approached you, extending his hand as if he was craving your touch again. You could tell that he was desperate for a little physical contact, perhaps to prove that you really stood in front of him. 
But you couldn’t, and you weren’t ready for any of that, so you backed off instead, giving him a clear signal that you weren’t on the same page as he was. 
There was this evident sadness in his eyes, and he tried his best to hold back his tears as his eyes began to water. 
“Y/N…I—”
“Miss L/N. You can address me that, Mr. Lee,” you bluntly replied before diverting your attention to the ground. 
It was when Juyeon finally got himself together and straightened his posture before clearing his throat. “Very well, Miss L/N. I’ll quickly brief you on the events happening today, with the group of celebrities arriving in a couple of hours soon. Please, have a seat.”
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“I hate him, I really do!” You screamed at the top of your lungs as you took the pint of beer in your hands before slamming it down onto the table. Your sister had to restrain you from causing a scene at the bar, trying to settle you down and handing you a glass of water to chug down your system. 
Your sister had just recently came back to Seoul for a little vacation, and you immediately asked that she could keep you accompany down at the local izakaya restaurant that you often visited to let off some steam. 
“Karma is really on your side huh, Y/N,” your sister teased. 
“I-It’s not funny, sissy….” your voice began to slur, indicating that you were starting to get drunk at this point. “Why…of all people, why?! Why did it have to be him? As my boss! In my new workplace!” 
“Look, it can’t be that bad. Who knows, maybe you might get another chance again with him.” 
“That’s not the point, sissy….after what he has done to me? After all that I have done to try my best to move on from the past? This should not be happening to me at all!” Your voice broke as you began tearing up, causing your sister to pull you close into her embrace, slowly caressing your back to help soothe you a little. 
Your sister was well aware of your history with Juyeon, especially when you’ve spent weeks, which eventually that turned into months of crying out to her over the phone since she was already studying abroad then, she knew how much the whole situation wrecked you badly, to the point that it has taken you months to start going out and meeting people outside of university eventually. 
She was there when you were both younger, seeing how you developed a crush on him later and knowing you weren’t just childhood friends and had something way more than that. It was a shame that Juyeon left without telling you, and she would’ve gone to the airport to confront him about it if only she had been back in Seoul then. But deep down, she knew Juyeon as much as you did and knew that suddenly, something probably came up for him to leave the country like that. 
As a matter of fact, your sister had always wished and rooted for you both to become a couple eventually; she had always been a firm believer of childhood friends to lovers anyway, especially when that was how she ended up with her current fiancé. Now that you both have reunited in the most unexpected way, she believes her theory about you both eventually having a second chance was stronger than ever before. 
With that, she lifted her eyebrows as if she had just come up with a brilliant idea. “Say, little sis. What exactly are you up to at work tomorrow?” 
You sniffled. “Umm…I guess I have a meeting with Juyeon to discuss the upcoming fashion show that is due to be set in a couple of months. Why do you ask?” 
Your sister gave you a little smirk in return before cradling you like a baby again. “Oh, it was nothing. I’m sure you’ll have a fruitful discussion tomorrow.”
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You dreaded coming to work today. The very first reason is that you woke up with a really bad hangover from last night, and you practically don’t remember much that has happened besides chugging down pints of beer from your system. It has been a while since you’ve drank this much, and most importantly, because you were upset over something. Otherwise, you were pretty much sober most of the time and always being the one to drag your co-workers home because they were far worse than you were. 
And, of course, it was also because you hated the idea that you must come face-to-face with your so-called ex-childhood best friend again—this time, in an actual meeting. Well, in some ways, you were glad that it was only a meeting for a potentially massive event that the company had been known to host for years and that Juyeon would probably be able to distinguish between personal and work-life issues. 
But still, you just weren’t ready to face him again, especially with the huge shock you’d received the day before. It was already hard enough for you to stay focused when Juyeon briefed you through your job scope and the meeting you would have for the day, trying your best not to let the tears drip down nor let the anger boil up. 
However, you had no choice since you must also stay professional at your work. You just got back to Korea, and there was no way you would chicken out and move everything back to the UK again. Well, potentially, you could, but it wouldn’t be an ethical move to make. 
So here you are, hugging your documents and laptop towards your chest, standing outside the meeting room. You had to take a few deep breaths before you could muster up the courage to turn the doorknob and enter the room. 
Once you did, you noticed how the entire room was filled up, with most of your co-workers in their designated seats, sorting through the documents they would use for the meeting. You immediately diverted your attention towards the front where Juyeon was seated, and you hated how you had actually spent a good minute admiring his features. 
He wore a simple beige coat over a white tee, paired with a pair of black slim pants with leather shoes. His black hair was styled all the way back, leaving a little strand of hair down on his forehead. He was busy flipping through his documents while setting up his laptop to project the PowerPoint slides for everyone to see. 
You just hated how extremely good-looking he was right now and that there was a high chance that you wouldn’t concentrate on your work throughout the next hour. 
And how you would actually want to run into his embrace and give him a little peck on the lips—
Wait, what? 
As Juyeon finally lifted his head from the monitor and looked at everyone else in the room, it was a sign that the meeting was about to commence, and you quickly took the still available seat, the front seat. 
Throughout the presentation, you tried your best to take in everything that Juyeon- well, your CEO, was trying to convey to his employees. It turns out that this upcoming fashion show would be one of the most crucial ones the company has ever done for years, especially now that all the big brands are willing to collaborate with GQ Korea and put out the best fashion show in the country. 
It was quite a breathtaking look to see how Juyeon was passionate about his job, talking and explaining each detail to his employees carefully while making it enjoyable for everyone to learn or be part of. With that, you have noticed how every single employee in the room was constantly taking down details as quickly as lightning, making sure not to miss out on any small detail. There were moments when some would raise their hands to ask further questions, and Juyeon was more than happy to answer them, making the whole meeting seem less stressful but instead quite engaging in return. 
There were times when you found yourself staring at him more than you should’ve, and every time he diverted his attention towards you, you would quickly duck your head down to look back at your laptop as if you were busy typing away on your notes. 
Time seemed to have passed quickly as Juyeon finally wrapped up the meeting and let everyone off. In fact, the meeting ended right at the dot, and it was just past noon, meaning it was lunchtime for all employees. Everyone was quick to dash through the door, their stomach grumbling after using up all of the energy for the meeting. For you, you decided to pack up your belongings at your own pace, knowing that you would be spending your lunch back at your cubicle with the little bento box your mother had packed for you this morning. 
As you are about to head straight for the door, the familiar voice stops you in your tracks, making you turn your head back to face the man himself. 
“Miss L/N, I would like to have a word with you.” 
Oh, god. It’s here. 
Mentally, you were cursing out all the vulgar words you knew at the back of your mind as you slowly approached your CEO, trying your best not to let out the croak in your voice. 
“Y-Yes, may I help you, Mr Lee?” 
“There is a place that I have to pay a short visit, and I would like you to keep me company.”
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Whenever an employer or the CEO would address their employees to keep them company as they pay a visit to a certain location, it usually meant that it was to meet up with a client or to survey certain products or places that could significantly be crucial for the company’s success. 
But here you were, sitting in one of the fancy cafes that wasn’t far from the office, having lunch with your CEO, who was sitting in front of you. 
Juyeon said nothing along the way as he brought you to the cafe, insisting that you sit down and order from the menu with no questions asked. As awkward as it was, you were about to deny his request before he looked straight down towards the menu, not even glancing at you. 
You figured this was probably part of the job, and there was no way you would deny your CEO’s request right here and then, especially when it was working hours and everything was strictly business. 
Once both of you have made your orders to the waitress that just passed by a minute ago, you diverted your attention towards the tablecloth, not wanting to look straight at Juyeon. However, his deep voice caught your attention, and you lifted your head back up after hearing the words you had wanted to say for the past seven years. 
“I think it’s about time I told you the truth, Y/N.” 
Oh, he called you by your name. 
As you focus your attention right on him, you can see the sadness in his eyes once more, just like how it was back when you first encountered him in his office the day before. 
“Umm…with due respect Mr Lee—”
“Juyeon is fine. We’re outside of work, Y/N. I would appreciate it if you could talk to me like we used to, and I will do the same,” he responded, slowly resting his arms on the tablecloth as if he were leaning slightly closer to you. 
With that you took a significantly big gulp, knowing that the day you longed for was finally here. You were about to get the answers you desperately needed to know, but at the same time, you weren’t so sure if you wanted to know the truth right now, especially with all of the things that you have gone through trying your best to take him out of your life completely. 
“Will you please give me a chance to listen to what I have to say?” He pleaded, looking at you with a desperate look in his eyes. 
Your gut and mind were trying to tell you that you have done your best to completely eliminate him in your life for the past seven years. Would you give up easily and open your enclosed heart just like that? After all of the hard work that you have done? 
Say no, Y/N. You have gotten over the guy. It’s all over between you two—
“Yeah. Go on.” 
Goddammit, Y/N. 
Immediately, his eyes lit up upon your words, and his shoulders slumped down a little, indicating that he has relaxed a bit. 
“Oh, thank god, Y/N. I guess you were still the same old Y/N that I remembered—”
“You said we’re not employers and employees now, so I’d say cut to the chase with what you have to say while you can, Juyeon,” you bluntly replied as you crossed your arms around you. 
In return, Juyeon gave you a little weak smile and a sigh before he eventually diverted his full attention to you. 
“Remember when we got separated back in high school? During our graduation day, you—”
“You left me behind, Juyeon.” 
“I didn’t have a choice back then, Y/N. But now I’m here to tell you everything. You have no idea how our stomach dropped when my father came home and told us that his company was about to go bankrupt, and we were on the verge of losing everything.” 
So that was what happened.
“And how it was also the day my mother found out that she had cancer and her chances of recovery were lower than expected.” 
“J-Juyeon…w-why didn’t you tell me all of this?” 
“I wanted to. I really wanted to so badly, Y/N. Because you’re my best friend, and you deserve to know everything. But I just didn’t know how to, and I was afraid of what might happen, and I don’t want to put the pressure on you.” 
“W-Where are they now, then?” 
Juyeon had to take in a big breath before choosing his following words wisely, knowing it must’ve been hard to even talk about it publicly. “Mom became bedridden, and she’s still receiving treatment in one of the hospitals back in the States. Dad is currently running a small little shop near the hospital along with my little brother.” 
“Then, why did you come back here?” 
“I came back because starting a proper company there was tough. I figured there might be a slight chance things could work out here in Seoul. With the remaining funds we had, I eventually begged my dad to give his final trust in me as I found a way to make things work out. Luckily, we had some acquaintances back here, and they helped me get into one of the prestigious universities and eventually landed me a job here at GQ Korea. I started as a normal employee before I eventually became their CEO a year prior.” 
It was then you noticed a single teardrop on the verge of dripping down his face from the corners of his eyes. Naturally and unbeknownst to you, your hand reached for the tissues placed neatly on the table, and you leaned in to wipe away that single teardrop. 
Only then did you both realise what you were doing, and that was when your eyes widened, and you were about to prop down back to your seat.
That was until Juyeon grabbed your wrist, not wanting to let you go. 
“This teardrop is nothing, Y/N. I’m so sorry you have to see this side of me. It’s not very cool, I guess,” he chuckled, trying his best to lighten up the mood a bit. 
As soon as he says those words, your other free hand eventually finds itself on Juyeon’s shoulders, causing the male’s eyes to widen this time before you finally speak out the words that you have always wanted to tell straight to his face all those years ago. 
“Juyeon, you need to start learning to put yourself before others. And I really mean it.” 
“Y/N, I—”
“No buts. Even after all these years, you’re still the same as before, always prioritising others before your own. As much as you are the most kind-hearted soul I’ve ever seen, you need to start loving and giving yourself some credit,” you replied, adding a little pressure onto your grip on his shoulders. 
With that, none of you said a word for a good couple of seconds, and you both just spent the entire time staring into each other's eyes as if you were conveying your messages non-verbally. That was until Juyeon finally decided to break the tension off by smiling at you, a genuine one you had consistently grown to love back then. 
“So, am I back in your good graces now, princess?” 
You were finally brought back to your senses, and you quickly removed both hands from him and sat down swiftly back on your chair, ducking your head down while giving a slight pout. 
Juyeon missed this sight of you and was absolutely admiring the whole situation that unfolded before him. Just then, both of your meals arrived, and the same waitress from before gently placed each of your respective ones in front of you. Juyeon then gently placed the cutlery in front of you. 
“Dig in,” he mentioned before whipping out the napkin and placing it right on his lap, before going in with his cutlery to cut through his steak. 
In return, you swiftly picked up yours and roughly cut through your freshly cooked breaded cod fish. 
“No one calls a normal friend princess, Lee freaking Juyeon,” you mumbled.
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Just when you thought that would be the only time you would actually spend some time alone with Juyeon, it turns out the male had perceived that you both were back just the way you were when you were kids. 
Since that day, Juyeon would actually make his way out to invite you often to join lunch with him at the same cafe, usually ordering a different dish from the wide selection of food on the menu. What Juyeon loved the most about the place was the ambience and good coffee, and he would always be seen ordering a big jumbo-sized cup of iced latte to bring back to his office to help get through the rest of the day. 
You, on the other hand, were often stuck with more or less the same few dishes that you’ve tried, and you, too, would order your usual iced americano back to the office once you both were done with the meal. 
At first, you have always tried your best to avoid having contact with him; that first lunch date was just a typical day, as you would try to convince yourself. But whenever Juyeon gets a little break out from the office, he would either send you a personal email or sometimes ask his personal assistant to come down to your department to inform you to wait for the man down at the lobby at noon. 
You obviously could do your very best to come up with excuses to let him know that you’re busy with something or you already have plans to eat with your co-workers, but it seemed that the heart does what it wants, and it does not align with the signals that your brain is trying to tell you; which is to avoid and cut off this whole friendship for good. 
So you were back to being the giddy seventeen-year-old little girl who often felt excited whenever you spent time with your childhood friend. Hence, every time you were taking the very last escalator down to the lobby, you would often use that little time to admire the way Juyeon would always lean against one of the pillars while swiping through his phone with one hand and keeping the other one inside the pocket of his coat. 
But you did not want to admit it just yet, so you would constantly remind yourself that he’s only back for a while; it wouldn’t be so easy to open up your ice-cold heart again. 
That was until today. 
Just a few days prior, Juyeon had given you a ticket to visit this huge Christmas market in the town centre. At first, you stared at the paper blankly, thinking it was all a joke and he couldn’t have gone with you. But the male made it clear that he invited you to come along, which would be the two of you together. 
Your heart was bouncing so fast that you were afraid it would eventually pop out of your chest as you slowly approached where you both were supposed to meet. You figured it best that you arrived twenty minutes earlier to compose yourself and try to understand your situation. 
As you paced back and forth for god knows how long, you finally heard your name being called out from the far distance, and you perked your head up to see that Juyeon was waving his hands and running towards you like he used to back when he was a kid. 
Once he finally stopped right in front of you, he began panting heavily to the point you were genuinely worried if this man was actually alright. 
“Woah, what the hell happened to you? You seemed like you were escaping from a monster or something,” you joked. 
“N-No…I went to get this for you…” Juyeon then hands you a brown paper bag, and you accept it while being all confused. 
“Open it, Y/N. Have a look at what’s inside,” he insisted before resting both hands on his hips. 
While giving Juyeon a weird look, you finally peeped into the bag and extended your arm into the brown bag before you finally felt something soft against your palms and eventually pulled whatever it was out. 
Your eyes widened when you saw what it was. 
“J-Juyeon…this…”
“Remember way back in high school; we promised each other that we would want to visit the Christmas markets, and how badly did you want this soft alpaca plushie that was way too expensive for neither of us to get our hands on? Yeah, I actually got it before the store closed like minutes ago.” 
He remembered. 
You have always been vocal about wanting this plushie for years, and there was no way your parents were buying it for you, claiming that it was way too expensive (which it was since it was part of a collaboration with one of the high-end fashion companies) and that you wouldn’t have a proper use for it. Back then, Juyeon couldn’t do anything but reassure you that one day, your wish would definitely come true while always giving you pinky promises. 
And now, you were finally receiving your biggest Christmas wishlist item as an adult, and you couldn’t be much happier. 
You laughed. “Juyeon, you do realise that I’m not a child anymore, right?” 
“Who says plushies are only meant for young children? Why can’t adults have their collection? I’ll tell you I have a Build-A-Bear in my bedroom.” 
“You must be joking.” 
“Mark my words, Y/N.” 
Eventually, you both started laughing out loud before you hugged the plushie close to you, activating the heating function in the toy to keep yourself warm; that was the main purpose that made you want to purchase this product long ago. 
“Thank you, Juyeon.” 
“Well, instead of thanking me, why don’t you keep me company for the night as we explore this Christmas market together?” 
You smiled. “With pleasure.”
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“Oh, Juyeon~ Have I ever told you how much I’ve admired your good looks? I’d like to think that your family genes are something else.”
After an hour or two of walking through the entire Christmas market and having too much fun going to each stall and trying out the different activities and food, you eventually stumbled upon one located towards the furthest end and sold various eggnog drinks. You have never tried this particular alcoholic beverage before; you were mostly used to the beers that you often get back in the pubs in London. However, Juyeon insisted that you give it a go especially for the Christmas season, and he eventually bought both of you a mug. 
The initial taste seemed a bit off to you, but once the alcohol started kicking in, you eventually began to chug the whole liquid down as if it were nobody’s business. After some time, one mug of eggnog began turning into two, and then three, and finally, you were pretty sure that you were on your fifth mug by now. 
That was when Juyeon realised that he should’ve stopped you by your second or third mug because now you were barely walking properly without his aid, and your speech began to slur as he linked your arms over his shoulders, trying his best to support you while walking you back home. 
You both had to take the subway trains to head back to your apartment and during the entire time, you were clingy with your childhood friend, often wrapping your arms around him and giving him a tight squeeze while mumbling incoherent words. You caught the attention of all passengers and passersby, but Juyeon could only smile at how you looked right now. 
He had never seen you drunk before, and this was a whole new experience for him. But he wasn’t too mad that you reminded him so much of your younger self; it was as if he was witnessing the seven-year-old you again in the present day. 
After walking from the subway and, eventually, towards your front door to your apartment, Juyeon was about to take you up towards the elevator until you stopped him in his tracks.
“No Juyeon~ why are you leaving me so early? We still have so much more to see in the market!” 
He smiled. “Y/N, I think it’s time for you to head home to get some rest.” 
“But I don’t wanna~” 
With that, Juyeon grabbed hold of both your shoulders as he bent down to be on the same eye level as you, trying his best to talk to you in your drunken stage. 
“Y/N, I’ll see you tomorrow, hmm? We’ve had loads of fun today, and besides, your mom and sister would be worried sick about you at this late hour.” 
Immediately, you lifted your pinky at him, which caused the male to stare at you blankly. “Pinky promise that I get to see you tomorrow, Juyeon-ie?” 
Oh, how insanely adorable you were to Juyeon right now. 
He chuckled before linking his pinky with yours, shaking it left and right slightly as if to seal the agreement. “I promise, we’ll see each other in the office first thing tomorrow morning.”
With the final pinky shake, Juyeon guided you towards the elevator and pressed the button. As you both waited for the elevator to come down to the ground floor, you suddenly broke off the silence, and Juyeon had to blink twice to know he wasn’t hearing things wrong. 
“I’ve always liked you Juyeon…even after all these years…I never stopped loving you…” you sobbed. 
Your nose was now sniffling, and you closed your eyes to let the tears drip down, not caring what Juyeon would think about all this. You were done trying to hold it back for so long, and you needed to let the burden that you’ve held onto for years finally let loose, and well, you were drunk at this point, so you couldn’t really control the words that slipped out from your mouth. 
“Why did you leave me just like that…did you know how much pain it has caused…and how hard I’ve tried to forget every single thing about you? I even threw away all of the pictures and toys we’d had together because the flashbacks of memories would often play in my mind upon seeing them,” you were now crying, and you began to raise your voice a little. 
“Why, Juyeon, WHY!!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, and immediately you burst out crying, plopping straight down onto the concrete floor. You hated how the alcohol wasn’t making you think straight and that you were feeling a roller coaster of emotions right now. 
Just let it out, Y/N. You’ve suffered long enough—
Immediately, a warm pair of arms wrapped around you, and a hand gently pushed your head down to let you rest on the crook of their neck. You finally glanced up to see that it was Juyeon, holding you tight and resting his chin on the top of your head. 
As much as you want to push yourself away from him, you can’t. You couldn’t explain why, and you have even made a pact to yourself that you wouldn’t want anything associated with him anymore. 
But why did the saying the heart wants what it wants have to be so accurate? 
You hated it, hated how you have always let your emotions take full control over your mind, not making you think straight, and often going against your plans. In fact, your heart ached so badly, and it was the same feeling that you felt seven years ago, right when Juyeon left you alone as he hopped onto his vehicle. 
The only thing you could do right now was to let the stream of tears pour down and cry out to your heart’s content. You felt weak, and you could do nothing to push him away. 
Juyeon couldn’t blame you, though, because how could he? Especially when he was the one who said nothing all those years ago. Now, he was seeing with his own eyes how much pain and trouble it has cost you, turning you into a vulnerable little petite girl who was crying her heart out in his arms. 
With that, he moved his lips down to plant a little kiss on your head and eventually closed his eyes as your cries filled up his eyedrums. 
“I’ll make it work, Y/N. I promise you that I’ll make things work this time.”
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“Oh, good fucking hell.” 
You were sitting on your work desk, bringing your hands to cover up your face. It was an absolute nightmare to hear from your sister about what happened the night before—how you got drunk and caused a little scene in public, which made everyone turn their attention towards you, how Juyeon was the one who brought you all the way back home, how you had a breakdown in front of him to the point you eventually fell asleep after crying your eyes out to the point he had to physically gave you a piggyback up to your front door and assisted your sister to plop you down on your bed. 
If there was a nearby cliff near your workplace, you would do anything to ditch work and actually head straight up there to jump off from the embarrassment. 
You were already not having a good time reuniting with Juyeon, let alone trying to sort your emotions out while seeing him at work every day and that he was your boss. But to confess your deepest thoughts while being vulnerable and drunk in front of him? That was not written anywhere in your books. 
As you were spending your entire lunch break groaning over what happened last night, you immediately received a call from your desk telephone, and you quickly composed yourself before picking the phone up. 
“Y-Yes, hello? This is L/N from the editorial department; how may I assist you for the day?”
“Good afternoon, Miss L/N. Please report to the CEO’s office immediately whenever you can.” 
Oh, Jesus take the wheel. 
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The entire walk up to the CEO’s office was nerve-wracking; it was as if you were being sent to detention at the principal’s office because you messed up really badly. So many thoughts ran through your mind, thinking about how to apologise to Juyeon for the scene you had caused the day prior.
Once you walked into his office, you tried your best to devise the best phrase to start the conversation, but it seemed that Juyeon beat you to it, immediately handing you a red ginseng hangover drink. 
You reluctantly accepted it while mumbling a soft ‘thank you’ before he insisted that you drink it immediately before him. Once you were done, he took the bottle away and tossed it straight into the bin, directly briefing you about the upcoming fashion show, now only a month away. 
Now that it was back to business and you were no longer childhood friends, you tried your best to keep your composure as you listened to all of the details he was going through one by one with you. 
Eventually, he decided to bring you along to meet up with one of the CEOs of the high-end brands on a trip to Seoul to discuss the plan in person further. Apparently, you have met with the CEO of Fendi, and it’s one of the brands that have been associated with GQ Korea for decades now. Somehow, Juyeon has gotten pretty close with the famous man himself over the years.
All of you met up in the famous Four Seasons Hotel for a pretty luxurious high-tea session while discussing the whole fashion show. It was mostly just Juyeon conversing with the CEO himself; you were mainly there to take down all the essential notes that both parties spoke.
Usually, it would have been his personal assistant job, but he insisted that you come along this time, saying it was part of your training. To be completely honest, you weren’t sure if Juyeon was the one mixing up between work and personal life issues at this point. All you wanted to do was to pray that this meeting gets over and done with quickly so that you could head back towards the comforts of your cubicle in the office and not face Juyeon for a while.
After an hour or so, it seemed as if the meeting was wrapped, and both parties finally parted ways for now, causing you to head straight back to Juyeon’s vehicle. Many people would think most CEOs would have their chauffeur, but Juyeon insisted that he always preferred to drive alone. 
He was still the chatterbox that you have always remembered back in the day, how we would often come up with any possible topic that would keep you entertained; you both could talk for days back then only if both of your families didn’t stop you from heading back home for meal time. 
There was only one problem this time: you were still troubled by what had happened the day before, and it was hard enough to even join Juyeon for this meeting with the CEO of Fendi in the first place. Now that both of you were alone in the car, things were far more awkward than they already were. Juyeon never touched on the topic from last night, but still, you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him in the face. 
Just when you thought Juyeon was about to take the left turn to head back towards the office, he took the other lane instead and drove towards the opposite direction.
“Juyeon, the office is the other way—”
“Let’s go somewhere, Y/N. Treat this as a little gift of stepping out of office hours for a bit. You’ll still get paid, though; don’t worry. I’ll make sure to inform your head department about your absence.” 
What on earth is going through your mind, Juyeon?
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It has been a few minutes since you have physically pressed yourself against the tank, slowly admiring various species swimming about minding their own business. 
Apparently, you both have arrived at the COEX Aquarium, known for homing a large variety of rare species of aquatic animals and typically the best place for school trips, holidays, and even as a date.
Wait, scratch that last one—
“Didn’t you always say how coming here has been on your bucket list for the longest time?” Juyeon questioned you as he slowly walked up towards where you were from behind, slipping both of his hands into his cloak as he, too, began admiring the beauty in front of him. 
That was when you finally diverted your attention to his face for the first time since hopping into his car this morning to head to the hotel. You were upset at yourself with how the feelings were the same as before: his pretty sculpted facial features, how good-looking he actually was, and how he could do the bare minimum, yet you would still swoon over the man himself. 
With all that has happened lately, something told you this was more than friend behaviour. Sure, Juyeon might be trying his best to patch up this whole relationship you once had, taking you to places and recreating new memories with one another, but you weren’t sure if Juyeon felt the same way as you did. 
That deep feeling within the pit of your stomach made you feel uncomfortable, and it was about time you finally confronted him about the one question that had pondered at the back of your mind for the longest time. 
If both of you wanted to continue whatever was happening between you, you needed to get the specific answer first. 
And it has to be now. 
“Juyeon, can I ask you something?” 
He hummed. “Yeah, go ahead.” 
With that, you turned your entire body facing him and took a deep breath to figure out the right words to convey your feelings for the man himself. “I meant what I said the night before.” 
That alone was enough to get his full attention, as he was now slowly turning himself fully towards you as if he was staring straight into your soul. You wanted to chicken out so badly and tell him it was nothing, and you both could just continue with the silence. But you have already come so far, and you know that this will only continue to haunt you for as long as you live if you aren’t going to address it now. 
So you mustered up every bit of courage left within you, and opened your mouth again. 
“I never stopped loving you, Juyeon. Even though we have lost contact for so many years, I never once stop thinking about you every single day. As much as I’ve tried so hard to forget about you, hell, I threw everything that reminded me of you into the dumpster or boxes and kept them deep somewhere where I wouldn’t even think about searching for it ever again, but to no avail.” 
Your body began to tremble as you tried to calm yourself down by playing with your fingers. “I couldn’t, Juyeon. Every time I thought I have succeeded in getting rid of you from my life for good, the thought of you just somehow finds its way to creep back up in my mind.” 
“I have no idea if karma sent me back here to Seoul, especially when my career was doing well in London. Imagine coming back and discovering that my new employer is someone I’ve tried so hard to forget about? The mixed emotions I felt then were insufferable.” 
As you began to speak more, tears started welling up in your eyes, causing your heartbeat to rise rapidly. But you decided to press on and choke back on your tears. 
“With all that you have done for me for the past weeks and months, I truly have no idea what on earth you are trying to prove to me, Lee Juyeon. Are you trying to fix our broken friendship? Or is it something more? What exactly are you even planning to do, Juyeon?” 
Finally, you took a few steps closer until you were inches away from him. 
“Be honest with me now, Juyeon. What exactly am I to you?” 
There was this tense moment between you two, and neither of you said a word to one another. You were looking straight at your childhood friend with red, puffy eyes, and his eyes were widened, looking at you and trying his best to take in everything you’d said. 
Something tells you that it was best not to hear about Juyeon’s opinions at all for the fear of rejection once more. If you had the power to dissect his mind to determine his thoughts and feelings about all of this, you would. Yet, you were still afraid of what might happen next. 
As you wait for his response, you slowly examine how his shoulders began to slump, and eventually he tries his best to talk some sense into you. 
“Y/N, I—”
“Ah! It’s Juyeon-ie!” 
The both of you immediately darted your head towards where the voice was coming from, and that was when you noticed a female running towards Juyeon while waving her hands, and a rather old man accompanied her. 
Who could it be? 
“Saeran? And Uncle Lee? What are you two doing here?” Juyeon questioned as the two individuals made their way towards you. It was also then they both noticed your presence and the soft-spoken young lady was the one who broke the ice. 
“You must be?” 
“O-Oh, I umm—”
“She’s Y/N; she used to be my neighbour back in the days when I was still living in Seoul.” 
Just a neighbour, huh? 
“Ah, Y/N!” The young female extended her hand for a little handshake, in which you awkwardly return the favour. “It’s a pleasure to meet you in person finally! Juyeon has spoken a lot about you.” 
Before you could even give a reply, it seemed that the older man whom you now know was his uncle, or rather, perceived that he was the one who managed to help Juyeon get a new start in life back here in Seoul, finally spoke and diverted Juyeon’s attention back to what they were here for in the first place. 
“We had made a little appointment this afternoon, don’t you remember, Juyeon?”
“Oh, yes! I’m so sorry. It must’ve completely slipped my mind since I have been pretty caught up with work lately,” Juyeon apologised while slightly bowing towards his uncle. 
“Not at all, Juyeon. I’m sure you must’ve been pretty busy with-” his uncle then diverts his attention towards you. “-a lot of things.” 
You definitely felt way too uncomfortable at the moment, and you needed to get out of the aquarium right this second if you did not wish to be suffocated by all of the tension in the air. 
Immediately, you gently removed your hands from the young female and quickly made a ninety-degree bow towards all of them.
“My humble apologies, it seems that I have disrupted an important meeting. I shall take my leave now.” 
As soon as you turned your heel towards the other direction, you suddenly felt a pair of hands grab your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. 
“Y/N! Wait, I’ll drive you back—”
“No, it’s fine,” you tried your best to smile at him. “I’ll just take the train located right outside the aquarium. Have a good day.” 
You instantly slip your hands off his grip and dash straight towards the front door, trying your best not to look back and ignore the tears dripping down your face as you walk down the steps towards the subway.
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It was now week two of cutting off all contact with Juyeon. It hadn’t been easy for you both at work and personally. In fact, you haven’t been doing great at all. It was as if you had turned into a living zombie, often feeling rather emotionless and drowning yourself in paperwork and avoiding contact with another except for your head of department. 
Since Juyeon was still your employer and CEO, he has definitely tried all means of contacting you, asking to see if you were doing okay or trying to get you up to his office to talk about the fashion show, or rather, to talk things out. But every single time, you would find ways to decline his request as best as possible while respecting him as your boss first and foremost. 
After a week of declining his invitations, his messages and calls eventually stopped coming a week ago; it was as if he had completely vanished for a little while. From what you have heard, it seemed that he had some urgent matters that he had to deal with, causing him to leave the office into the hands of his assistant for now.
It was finally a little breather for you since you didn’t have to put on this facade for the time being, letting you let loose for a bit. Going through sleepless nights throughout the past couple of weeks definitely has taken a toll on your mental well-being. 
You told yourself you needed to hold it all in for another week. Once this whole fashion show is done, you will get your well-deserved vacation off work for one week. 
It’ll be alright. Things will definitely work out in one way or another, Y/N.
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It was finally the day for the long-awaited fashion show hosted by GQ Korea and the collaboration among famous brands around the globe. A swarm of people marched into the rented convention hall, filling the entire space within minutes.
You and your co-workers were busy getting everything organised and ensuring everything was in place. Since you were in the editorial department, you have been going about talking to all of the big figureheads from each respective brand, mostly just breaking the ice as well as interviewing them so that you have your necessary notes to draft out the proposal for the upcoming magazine. 
Time passed quickly and it was time for the show to begin. As you sat down on one of the chairs, you made your way towards the far end corners of the hall, getting ready your notepad and trusty blue ballpoint pen. 
As the light began to dim, Juyeon eventually made his way up on stage with a microphone, giving the guests a warm welcome and a little opening speech before the models began their runway walk. Seeing the man himself again was a bittersweet moment for you. As much as you wanted nothing more associated with him, your eyes just couldn’t seem to turn away from him.
It did not help that he was dressed up in a black tuxedo, with his hair styled up with his usual one strand on his forehead. He looked strikingly handsome, and you wouldn’t be surprised if he managed to woo almost everyone in the audience tonight. The way he presented himself was truly magnificent, and you could see why he was able to rise to the ranks of being a CEO at such a young age. 
Tears began welling up in your eyes again, but you tried your very best to hold them back and mentally cursed at yourself, thinking that this was all professional work now and that there was no room for any personal matters for the night. 
Once he made his desired speech, he eventually came down from the stage and sat at one of the front row seats, and that was where you could clearly see that the very same girl from the aquarium sat right next to him, along with his uncle and personal assistant. It shouldn’t bother you since they are practically family to him. It was none of your business, so why couldn’t you take your eyes off them?
Or rather, with him and the young lady who was clearly having fun whispering into each other’s ears. 
It has nothing to do with me. 
You constantly reminded yourself that whenever you tried to spare a glance at them, all while you were taking down notes from the show. It was definitely a challenge trying to stay focused, and there were a couple of times when you needed to close your eyes for a bit and take a few deep breaths to proceed with your work. 
The show finished smoothly, and the audience responded with a standing ovation. You definitely felt a sense of accomplishment from that, too, given that all of your hard work over the past months had finally paid off. 
The event wouldn’t have been complete without an after-party, so here you were in the hall next door—with all of the guests, models, and even staff alike having loads of fun chatting about with a glass of champagne in hand. Eventually, the DJ that was hired began to blast out a wide selection of music, indicating that whoever felt comfortable hitting up the dance floor was able to do so. 
You smiled as you saw a couple of your close co-workers pull up some moves on the dance floor; it reminded you of loads of your time back in the UK—going to the local pubs and just having the time of your life drinking and partying with your friends. 
Just as you were lost in thought, you suddenly felt a little tap on your shoulder, and you turned around to see that Juyeon’s assistant insisted that someone wanted to see you in person. 
You didn’t think much of it since you already had a little bit of alcohol in your system, so when you finally realised who was the one who wanted to see you, panic began to rush through your veins, and you tried your best to make sense of the situation. 
“Mr Lee? Is something the matter?”
You did not need to see the older male again, especially when he gave you a not-so-good first impression back at the aquarium. However, you had no reason to devise an excuse to leave; he was much superior to you anyway. 
“Why, good evening, Miss L/N. I hope you are enjoying the party so far, and congratulations on the job well done. I must say Juyeon always excels in his work, no matter what obstacles he encounters along the way.” 
The only thing you could do was flash a little smile back at him, as much as it made you uncomfortable. In the back of your mind, you have dozens of questions running through your mind, thinking about in what manner his uncle has any business with you. 
Eventually, he began speaking as if he was chanting through a book, giving you a whole load of information that was a little bit too much to take in at the moment. 
“It seems that Seoul life has been too tedious for you, don’t you think? Have you ever wondered about transferring back to London? Perhaps it would be a much better place for you to reside in.” 
“Umm, with all due respect, sir, how did you know about my background—”
“Oh, I have always kept an eye on you; you were Juyeon’s childhood friend, after all.” 
Keyword. “Were” 
“With that being said, I have read a couple of your articles before from the London Mail, and I must say, they are actually quite extraordinary.” 
“W-Why, t-thank you, Mr Lee. I really do appreciate them—”
“Speaking of transferring, the CEO for Fendi has actually taken quite a liking to you and your work. Even throughout the whole fashion show back there, he has been talking on and on about you, saying how you would prove to be a fruitful addition to his company.”
Just like that, Mr Lee began to step forward to hand you a little sticky note, which clearly had a number written on it. 
“If you ever change your mind, give me a call. Besides, I’m sure you already know the answer deep within your heart. I will be waiting,” Mr Lee responded with a smug before entering back into the hall. 
You stared back down at the note and eventually began thinking about what his uncle said prior. Suddenly, you started feeling conflicted, thinking this was the right place to belong. But it could also be his way of trying to brainwash you; you’re pretty sure you felt like a menace in his eyes. 
You decided you needed some fresh air to clear your thoughts for a bit, so you headed out towards the balcony right up the stairs. You figured that an open-air rooftop seemed perfect for some alone time. 
If only you were the only one who was planning to use the same exact spot that is.
Right when you reached the door that was ajar on the rooftop, you immediately recognised the two people standing before you, the female leaning in to give your childhood friend a peck on the lips.
You stand there motionless, and immediately, your blood starts to boil, something you haven’t felt in a while. The glass of champagne then drops towards the ground, and the shattered noises make the two turn their attention towards you. 
It all felt like a sudden pause like time had stopped for a few moments. The both of you were staring deep into each other’s eyes, not knowing what to do or how to respond. But then, Juyeon eventually spoke to break the silence. 
Before you could ever hear what he had to say, you were already dashing down the stairs, not caring that you had missed a couple of steps and that there were a few instances where you felt like you were about to trip and fall straight down back where you came from. 
Not even wanting to let your co-workers know about anything, you quickly dashed through the front gates, running through the now gloomy skies that were bound to have a heavy downpour within a few minutes. 
You should’ve remembered that Juyeon was the basketball team leader back in high school for a reason; no matter how fast you ran through the streets, he eventually caught you and yanked you back towards him, causing you to press up against his chest. 
“Let me go! Let me go—”
“Y/N! Please! Let us just talk things out.” 
You used up all of your strength and pushed him away as hard as you could before you began raising your voice back at him. “Talk? Don’t be ridiculous. You have done more than enough, and I have seen enough.” 
“Y/N, no. You don’t understand—”
“What else do I have to understand!?!? You have done more than enough to shatter me over and over again, Juyeon! And to think I was dumb enough actually to think we could work things out again!” You screamed. 
“Y/N…please…just calm down and listen to what I have to say…” Juyeon was now practically begging you, begging you just to stop. 
“You clearly don’t understand the pain that I’ve gone through, Juyeon. You weren’t there to witness or experience it anyway! Why did we even become friends in the first place, huh!?!?” 
God, cat’s out of the bag. 
That last sentence was definitely not meant to be said at all; it was one of your deepest, darkest thoughts that you have sworn that nobody should ever find out about, especially when it is directed towards the person who stood before you.
“I hate you, Juyeon…I really do…for all of the pain that you have caused me…” you were now sobbing like a child, which pained Juyeon so much seeing how you were now. 
With that, a loud thunder resonated throughout the city, and a heavy downpour began pouring down from the skies. The both of you were now soaked, and you mustered up the courage to say your final words to him as the tears began mixing with the rain. 
“Please…I beg of you…just stop looking for me…or even talk to me at all…just leave me alone…that’s the last thing I will ask of you…” 
“I don’t want anything to do with you no more.” 
You slowly began backing away, and when you reached a good amount of distance, you turned your heel and began running away into the shadows, not sparing a final glance at your childhood friend who stood at the same spot under the pouring rain. 
This is my final goodbye, Juyeon.
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If you thought the whole week of you being a walking zombie in the office was terrible enough, clearly, nobody was prepared for the current state that you were in. You locked yourself up in your room and refused to see anybody, even your mother and sister. 
You would constantly lay in bed, tossing and turning, even though it was hard to fall asleep. Since you avoided contact with your family members, there was nothing much they could do but place a tray filled with your meals and dishes in front of your door, waiting for you to eventually open up during times when you actually felt hungry and took them into your room to savour them all on your own. 
You didn’t need anyone or anything now; you craved alone time and peace. 
As you curl up in bed, sometimes even at the corners of your room, your eyes would often dart towards the sticky note handed to you by his uncle. So many times you have thought about it: what if life would’ve been better abroad and coming back to Seoul was truly a grave mistake that you have made? What if this whole decision was actually an awakening moment for you to realise that this is not where you should belong? 
Days went back and eventually, it became a week. There were only a few days left before you returned to the office for work. The longer you kept staring at the note, the more motivated you were to take the risk and start again. 
Every time you were reminded of what happened that very fateful night, you rationalised that maybe what Mr Lee said was true after all. Perhaps Seoul is really not your place to belong. 
As the clock ticked, your desire to leave everything behind felt stronger. 
You waited until the clock finally struck noon for you to finally stand up with your phone in hand, punching each number into the dial pad and bringing it to your ear. 
Once the ringing eventually got through and you were met with a voice on the other end of the line, you took a deep breath before muttering the words you have been reluctant about all this while. 
“I’ll take up the offer.”
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“For the very last time sissy, I promise I will be fine,” you spoke through your headphones as you were on a video call with your sister, who was back home at your apartment. 
“You have never done something so impulsive before, and given that you made this whole decision during your darkest hours? I highly doubt that you’re okay, Miss Y/N.” 
“Well, I can assure you that the darkest hours are gone, and I’m now free and much happier. I can work with Fendi!” 
Your sister sighed through the phone. “Working with big brands is one thing; what about your physical and mental well-being?” 
“Rome doesn’t sound too bad to me, and besides, living in the UK for a couple of years has definitely given me the experience I’ve needed to survive back in the EU again.” 
“Fine. Just…be careful, okay? Give mom and I a call once you’ve touched down.” 
You gave a little flying kiss through the phone. “Don’t worry, I will.” 
After waving goodbye on both sides, you clicked the red end call button and leaned back onto the chair you had been sitting on for the past hour. It was definitely a shocker to you that Fendi was willing to accept you immediately without having to go through any sort of significant interviews and that they were kind enough to even provide accommodations for you. At the same time, you work for them under a contract of two years. Frankly, it was a good deal and a steal. 
You slowly stare into the digital clock on the big screen, which eventually becomes an announcement. 
“All passengers bound for Rome, Italy, please head to gate 4B and be ready for boarding!” 
Instantly, almost all of the people around you began standing and lining up as if they needed to be the first to get on board. You have always disliked and never understood why the rush and pushing against one another trying to fight for the first slot, so you often just sat back and relaxed until only a couple of folks left to board the plane. 
Time went by quickly, and thirty minutes have passed since then. Now, only a handful of passengers are left to board. That was when it was your cue to get up and sling your backpack onto your back. 
As you slowly walked towards the counter to let the flight attendants scan your passport and let you through the gates, you felt a sudden tap on your shoulders, causing you to turn behind to see who it was. 
You didn’t have much time to respond until you were pulled in for a tight embrace; that familiar cologne was enough to make the tears well up in your eyes again.
“J-Juyeon…” your voice muffled. 
“Stop. Let me just…let me do the talking this time. Please.” 
You would have definitely fought back and started pushing him away once more, but it seems that you were either too taken aback or lost all of the energy throughout the past week to do so. Instead, you just stood there motionless in his arms. 
“Y/N, I know it would be horrible for me to ask for forgiveness because I definitely do not deserve any of that after what I have put you through. Or even for another chance because you clearly gave me one, and it was my fault for not appreciating nor cherishing the moment when it happened,” he began stroking your head, his fingers running through your long, silky, soft hair. 
“But one thing is for sure: I will not let you go this time. This time, I am going to hold you so tight that there’s no room for you to escape; I’ll make sure that you will forever be safe and sound in my arms, and I will be the one who is going to bring you joy instead of pain and tears.” 
He then bends down to give you a little kiss on your forehead. “You mean a lot to me, Y/N. And I’d like to think you are more than just a friend; you’re my other half. Without you, I wouldn’t be able to move on, knowing that I will lose you again, and this time, forever, if I don’t stop you now.” 
“So please, Y/N. I’m begging you. Please don’t go.” 
With his final words, you eventually find your arms slowly snaking up his back and returning the hug to him. You weren’t too sure why you did that, especially after the tremendous pain you have gone through the past week in particular. At the end of the day, the phrase where the heart wants what it wants will forever remain faithful to you, whether you like it or not. 
You sobbed. “You’re not going to make me stay that easily.”
“Oh yeah? You think I’m not capable of doing that?”
“Prove it then.” 
Instantly, one of his hands travelled back up to your chin and lifted them, causing you to look directly towards his as he slowly bent down to interlock his lips with yours. The kiss was rather heated, as if the both of you had been waiting for this to come so badly. You couldn’t care less if you both were actually making out at the airport.
Juyeon cupped your face with both hands as he tilted his head for you to gain more entrance into his. His lips felt soft yet demanding as if you were devouring a forbidden fruit. In return, you run your fingers through his silky black hair. 
After a few minutes, you both broke apart for some fresh air, trying your best to catch your breath simultaneously. 
“Is that supposed to make me stay put in Seoul, Juyeon?” You teased. 
With that, he merely replied with a little smile followed by a smirk. “That, Miss Y/N, was actually a pact you made to me. Treat it as a contract, if you will, that you are bound to stay by my side no matter what.” 
“Ugh, that’s so foul of you!” 
“You should know that I have my ways; I’m not the CEO of GQ Korea for nothing.” 
The both of you eventually burst out into laughter while Juyeon finds both hands on your waist while you wrap your arms around his shoulders. 
“Listen, Y/N. I want to apologise on behalf of my uncle and Saeran.” 
“Oh, yeah. No big deal. By the way, is Saeran—”
“It’s not what you think it is.” 
“It’s not?”
He smiled. “She’s my little cousin, and she often showers me with tons of hugs and kisses, even though I’ve told her to stop a million times.” 
“Well, you’re lucky to have a cousin who loves you that much,” you replied. 
“Yeah, but she’s going to have to learn that she can’t do that anymore because someone else is going to replace her job for that.” 
As much as you knew who he referred to, you still wanted to drag this further. “And who exactly is that?” 
“Hmm…maybe the contract before wasn’t clear enough. Should I make another one?”
You slapped his chest immediately. “Don’t you dare, we’re in public.” 
Again, another burst of laughter was genuinely beginning to make you feel a lot better, even to the point of slowly healing all the scars you have had before. 
With that, you needed to make yourself clear to the man himself. 
“Juyeon, can I just be honest with you?”
“Of course, sweetheart.” 
“I appreciate you doing all of this for me, but I just want to give you a heads-up that it’ll take a while for me to heal from everything completely and that I’m sorry if I don’t give you the exact treatment that you expect from me, and I—”
You were then silenced with another kiss on the lips; this time, Juyeon took the time to shower you with as many kisses as possible, making sure that each was worthwhile before breaking the kiss again. 
“Y/N, I don’t care about all of that. You can take as long as you need, but just know that I will be here for each step you take, and I’ll give you support whenever you need it. I promise. I will not leave you behind ever again.” 
As you both plastered a soft smile, you leaned in to rest your forehead against each other, taking in everything that had happened minutes prior.
“Here’s to a new beginning with you.”
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masterlist
taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @zzoguri @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @cheonsafics @sulkygyu @jaerisdiction @lngwayup @daisyvisions (join my permanent taglist here!)
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sanaxo-o · 2 months ago
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BF! Texts with Eric Sohn
Genre/warnings: fluff, smau, reader is sick but still goes to work
Sana: I am back (sort of) hopefully I write something for Halloween. Enjoy. Also a request from my dearest @bella-feed.
POV: you’re sick and he just wants to take care of you
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Tagging: @cloverdaisies @mosviqu @kimsohn @dalliesque @bella-feed @a-dream-bookmark @deoboyznet @k-films
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deobienthusiast · 1 year ago
Text
like a moth to a flame | ljy
• pairing: royal guard!juyeon x gn!reader
• word count: 11.2k words (so fucking proud of myself)
• genre: forbidden love!au, royal!au, angst, fluff
• warnings: brief mentions of nudity, implied sexual themes without actually mentioning it, suggestive, mentions of death (there’s a few descriptive death parts and descriptive injury parts), blood, dead bodies
• synopsis: after falling for the one of the royal guards your family has hired, you now face the dilemma of worrying about his safety without giving away your relationship
• notes: no lie, my expectations for this fic weren’t very high, but when i finished it i bawled like a baby because of how proud i was for finishing it and how proud i was of it. this has to be probably my best fic yet, so i hope you guys really really enjoy it!!!! banner is by @sungbeam ILY THANK YOU SO MUCH🥹🥹
• tagging: @deoboyznet @userjuyo @cloverdaisies @hongyangi @juyeonszn @sureogi @kimsohn @invuwrld (let me know if you want to be apart of a tag list for a certain member OR be tagged for any tbz fics)
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Life had a funny way of placing people in front of you so they could become a part of your life. You always wondered, if you were out on your own and living a very different life than the one you live, just how you would meet the same people who were already present within your young adolescent years. Being the child of a king seemed like the life everyone would want. However, when you peek upon the lives of the common who live normally without an impending threat constantly over their heads, you get jealous. They live with such ease, with no cares in the world. You live with a constant fear of your castle doors being broken down, and someone wreaking havoc on your family. That was until your father hired new royal guards.
They were all relatively tall. Some being your height, while others just towered right over you. Three were on the younger side, four of them being your age, and four being older than you. You grew close to the ones who were your age. You grew close to the younger ones as well. They were a bit more childish, so they were kept more so in the castle as to not provide any unwarranted attention. The four eldest were the main ones that were sent out on missions, coming back beaten, bruised, and bloodied. But finishing their job, nonetheless. The eleven guards took care of business when it needed to be dealt with. There was one that stood out to you, though.
When these guards stepped through the castle doors, your curiosity got the best of you. You usually don’t dabble in your father’s affairs. Too worried you’ll hear something that you don’t want to. However, when these men stepped out of his chambers, you couldn’t help but lock eyes with one. He stopped almost immediately, his cat-like eyes dragging you in as his colleagues moved from around him to head to their respective posts. He gave you a bow and a small smile as his long legs took strides to put him right in front of you.
Holding out his large hand, you gently placed your smaller one in his. This allowed him to bring your hand to his lips where he left the softest brush of a kiss upon your knuckles.
“Your highness,” He said softly.
And that was how you met Juyeon. The royal guard who had stolen your heart, and you his. From that point on, you two were inseparable, having to hide your relationship due to the nature of his job. He was forbidden to be with a member of the royal family, but even he couldn’t lie. You were so captivating. Juyeon had never met anyone like you in his life. The way you move so elegantly and swiftly. How you had a multitude of people in the castle wrapped around your pretty little finger (him included). Juyeon was so in love with you that it scared him. Keeping your relationship a secret was hard for the boy. Especially considering he was now to a point where he’d leave with the older guards for missions, which meant leaving your safety in the hands of the three youngest who he knew had massive crushes on you (Sunwoo, especially). Juyeon wanted you for himself. He didn’t like to share, especially not with his members. And you were too special to him, too precious for your safety to be left in the hands of anyone but himself. Of course his members weren’t idiots. In fact, the younger ones were the first to find out about the two of you and spread it to the rest of the crew. This led to Juyeon getting a stern talking to from the oldest, Sangyeon, explaining to him the dangers of falling for a member of the royal family and the harm it could put him in if anyone besides them found out. Juyeon didn’t care, and quite frankly, neither did you.
That’s how two of the older members, Hyunjae and Jacob, found you two in your room with nothing but the royal cotton sheets covering your bodies that were wrapped around each other.
“Seriously?!” Hyunjae said incredulously. “What is wrong with the two of you?”
Jacob walked towards the side of the bed Juyeon lay on as he grabbed his uniform, tossing it to the boy.
“Change! Before Sangyeon realizes you’ve left your post outside the bedroom door.” Jacob said, emphasizing the “outside”.
Juyeon chuckled, rolling over just slightly to softly peck your lips as he sat up, leaving enough slack in the sheets so you could cover yourself.
“I’m not changing in front of you guys.” Juyeon gestured to the two boys.
Hyunjae scoffed. “But you’ll change in front of,”
“Got it! You’ve got three minutes.” Jacob cut off the boy as he pushed him to the door.
He cracked it slightly, checking to see if anyone was outside, making you all hold your breath. He turned to you all, nodding slightly as he and Hyunjae exited before repeating. “Three minutes, Juyeon.”
You couldn’t help but chuckle. Despite knowing the danger Juyeon was putting himself in, you knew they would never tell Juyeon to stop seeing you. Especially since you made him the happiest he’s ever been since he became a royal guard. At least that’s what Hyunjae had told you.
Juyeon waited for the door to close completely before grabbing his boxers from the floor. Sliding them over his legs to cover his bare bottom half, he stood up, turning around to stare at you.
“What?” You said softly.
He just shook his head with a shrug. “You’re just so beautiful.”
Rolling your eyes, knowing how completely ravaged you look because of him, you just nod. “Yeah, you definitely need to get back to your post.”
Juyeon laughed, his hair bouncing with every movement of his head. You grabbed the night clothes the tall man had rid you of when he snuck into your room, slipping them on as you got up to help Juyeon with his uniform. His pants and boots went on without any struggle, but getting his top fastened down enough to cover the marks you left on him seemed to be a bit more of a challenge. Feeling a little guilty, knowing he could get in trouble, you mumbled out an apology.
“I guess I got carried away.” You spoke sheepishly.
He looked at you through the floor length mirror, having finally found a way to cover everything as he smiled.
“Don’t be. They let me know that I’m doing my job correctly.”
Now that was corny, but you couldn’t deny the way a heat creeped up your neck at his words.
As the last button on his top got fastened, a knock sounded on the door.
“Sangyeon is looking for you.” Jacob’s muffled voice said.
Juyeon let out a sigh as he walked over to you, grabbing your hand to bring to his lips just like he did the first day he met you.
“I love you. I’ll see you in the morning after our briefing with your father.”
You could only nod, too captivated by his voice to truly understand what was coming out. Juyeon kissed your forehead this time before moving to the door, throwing a wink to you from over his shoulder as he got out just in time. You laid your ear to the door as you could hear a pair of heavy-footed boots make their way to your door.
“Please tell me you weren’t doing what I think you were?” You heard Sangyeon ask him.
Juyeon replied. “I was just checking in. Making sure everything was okay. I swear.”
From the other side of the door, Sangyeon gave the younger boy a look. “You’re playing with fire Juyeon.”
Juyeon could only nod as Sangyeon walked back to his post, finishing his rounds of checking on each guard. You sighed, allowing your feet to drag you to the now empty king bed that felt too big for one person.
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You fell asleep easier than you had expected, waking to a knock at your door. You groaned slightly as the door opened, your right hand coming in to greet you.
“Good morning, your highness. You must get dressed immediately. Your father has summoned everyone to the ballroom for a meeting. He says it’s urgent.” The girl tells you.
You nod, thanking the girl softly as she lays your clothes out on your bed. She exits, leaving you to get dressed as you frown. A meeting that involved everyone in the castle was never a good thing, and suddenly a feeling of nausea passed over you. Did someone find out about you and Juyeon? Is that what this was about? Your thoughts made you dress quickly as you fixed your hair, rushing to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You opened your bedroom door, meeting the back of a head belonging to a rather tall man. You felt yourself relax as you lifted your hand to tap his shoulder before they turned. Your hand retracted immediately as your eyes widened slightly.
“Younghoon, what are you doing over here?” You asked.
The older members watched over the more senior members of the family so seeing one of them posted outside your door worried you to no end.
“I’m just here to escort you to your parents' chambers. The queen and your sister are waiting for you.” Younghoon told you.
You nodded, following the boy through the long corridor. He stopped in front of the door, looking around first before opening it. You furrowed your eyebrows, walking in the room as he closed the door behind you. Your mother looked at you, giving you a small smile.
“Mother, what is happening?” You asked quietly.
She sighed. “Your father is briefing the guards. It’s important that we wait here.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Why was Younghoon posted outside my door? He only does that if there is impending danger.”
Your mother made your sister comfortable on the bed as she stood up. She gently grabbed your arm, pulling you off to the side as she spoke in a hushed tone.
“There’s been some talk,” She starts.
“Talk?”
“They think someone is after your father and I.”
You swallowed. “Which means they’ll also come for her and I?”
You raised a hand to point between yourself and your sister. The action made your mother nod as a knock was put to the door. You jumped slightly as someone spoke.
“Your majesty,” Sangyeon’s voice said just loud enough to make it through the door. “You can come out now.”
You opened the door, coming face to face with the senior guard who gave you a small smile.
“Your highness,” He said with a bow. “The King is looking for you.”
You nodded, thanking the older boy as you gave your mother a kiss on the cheek. You quickly left the room, walking down the hallway towards the ballroom. You noticed Sunwoo and Eric, the two youngest guards, conversing outside the door. They both were having a very hushed, secretive conversation as you walked up to them. You got your hand onto the gold gilded handle of the ballroom door before Eric stopped you.
“Your highness, you can’t go in yet.” The youngest guard said.
“Why?”
“The King is briefing the guards.”
You rolled your eyes. “So why aren’t you two in there?”
Sunwoo spoke this time. “They are being sent on a mission.”
You turned to the boy. “What mission?”
Sunwoo and Eric turned to look at each other, almost as if to silently ask the other if they should tell you. Eric shoved the boy slightly, making Sunwoo whine before he spoke.
“There’s a threat to the kingdom. To your parents and you and your sister. We know the source of the threat and your father is sending the more senior guards out to neutralize the situation.” Sunwoo said.
You nodded, letting out a calm breath. “So, no Juyeon. He’s not going?”
This time Sunwoo was quick to shove Eric, knowing how you got about Juyeon going on missions.
“Uh, well…not exactly.”
Before you could reply the door opened. Your father looked between you and the younger guards before speaking to them.
“Shouldn’t you be at your posts?” He asked as the two younger boys nodded quickly, heading off to their respective posts.
He pulled you into the ballroom where the rest of the guards, more specifically your guard, were gathered around. Juyeon lifted his head, his hair falling into his eyes as he watched your father walk you into the ballroom.
“Gentleman, this mission is important. You need to take great caution in your posts and each move you make. You have to remember who you’re out there protecting. Most importantly, remember that you are out there protecting each other. This threat is serious, and I do not expect you back until it’s completely dissolved,”
You started to drown out your father’s words as you made eye contact with Juyeon. He gave you a sad smile as you looked over who all was with him. Juyeon, Hyunjae, Jacob, Changmin, and Kevin. You knew Sangyeon would be leading the troops and Younghoon would be up there as well. The other older guard, Chanhee, never went on missions unless absolutely needed. Your sister had taken a liking to him the moment they were hired so he stayed to help your mother. You knew Juyeon never went on missions either for the same reason, in fact he, Changmin, or Kevin rarely went away. The severity of the situation was beginning to set in as you excused yourself, feeling a set of eyes on you as you left the room.
You felt sick knowing that Juyeon would be sent out on a mission that clearly was more dangerous than people were letting on about. You headed for the green house, dismissing any staff that was in the building to care for the flowers as you took in deep breaths, trying to steady your rapidly beating heart. Soft footsteps built up behind you as you closed your eyes, speaking just as softly.
“Juyeon, you’re going to get hurt.”
Large hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you close enough so he could place a soft kiss on your temple.
“Let’s not think about that.” He whispered.
You scoffed, turning yourself around. “How can I not? My father is sending you out with the senior guards to neutralize a threat and you want me to not think about it?”
Juyeon sighed. “I couldn’t tell him no. I would’ve been dismissed.”
“At least then you’d still have your life.” You countered, pushing away from him.
“Then what do you want me to do,” Juyeon says, frustration laced through his words. “You tell me what you want me to do! This is my job. We both knew something like this would arise. Let’s not act surprised. I’m a royal guard, and if I get sent on a mission by order then that’s what I have to do. I could lose everything if I say no.”
Tears built up in your eyes as you raised your voice with the tall guard. “And what about me? What if I lose you?”
Juyeon’s face softened at your words, the frustration melting away.
“Baby,” He spoke, barely above a whisper, as he stepped towards you. “You’re never going to lose me, ever. I’m yours. I’m always going to gravitate towards you no matter how far apart we are.”
His hands cupped your face, forcing you to look at him as his thumbs gently wiped at the tears staining your skin.
“Don’t ever think I’m not going to come back to you. I’m going to be the first one back so I can see you, touch you, hold you, kiss you,” Juyeon pauses, placing a tender kiss to your lips. “I’m not leaving you. Like a moth to a flame.”
You could only nod, mind still reeling with the idea of Juyeon never coming back from his mission. Despite your father having no knowledge of your relationship with one of his best royal guards, you were positive you’d never be able to forgive him if something happened to Juyeon. The boy watched you intently, seeing the gears in your head turning at capacity.
“What are you thinking about?” He asked.
Finally pulling yourself from your thoughts, you spoke. “When do you leave?”
“Before sundown.”
With a nod of your head, you pulled both his hands from your face, squeezing them gently. “Please, don’t do anything stupid. Listen to Sangyeon. And if it gets too heavy, fall back.”
“Love, those weren’t the king's orders.” The guard answered.
You scoffed, with a roll of your eyes. “No, they’re mine. And if you love me, you’ll follow them.”
This time you watched Juyeon intently as a small smile made its way to his face. “Of course I will. Because I do love you.”
“I love you, too.”
You and Juyeon pulled apart, but not before leaving a last kiss to each other’s lips. You knew the boy had to pack for the journey, and he would get in trouble if he wasn’t with the rest of the squad. Juyeon kept a hold on your hand as he backed away.
“I’m going to come back.” He tells you.
You smiled. “Promise?”
A nod and smile was thrown back to you. “With all my heart.”
You watched the boy exit the greenhouse as you mentally prepared yourself for the coming days that were sure to be Juyeon-less. You watched from your bedroom balcony as your father sent the guards off into the sunset, not having the stomach to stand with your mother and sister as he sent the men into what might be their early deaths. Juyeon watched you the entire time, giving you a small smile and mouthing the same promise he made just moments ago in the greenhouse.
I’m going to come back.
His words echoed in your head over and over again, pushing you into a sleepless night.
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The morning sun peeked through your blinds too quickly for your liking considering you were finally starting to fall asleep. You let out a yawn, pulling yourself from your bed as you heard a faint knock.
When you pull the door open, you came face to face with your mother.
“Mother,” You say, startled by her presence so early in the morning. “Is everything okay?”
She nodded. “I just wanted to check in on you. You seemed upset about something yesterday.”
If only you knew.
“I’m fine. Just wasn’t feeling too well,” You lied. “Have we heard anything from the guards?”
Your mother chuckled. “Sweetheart, it’s too early to hear anything. If anything, the guards will just be getting to their destination. We’re sending Sunwoo out later as our line of communication.”
You let out a breath, hoping for a better answer. “Well, will you let me know if you hear anything?”
Your mother nods. “Of course, my dear. You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you have a thing for one of those guards.”
You could only chuckle nervously as your mother sauntered off, her dress making a ‘swooshing’ sound across the floor of the hallway. You let out the breath you were holding as you leaned up against the large wood door of your bedroom. You closed your eyes, bringing both hands to your head to rub at your temples as someone spoke.
“Any messages you want me to relay to the squad?” Sunwoo’s voice made you jump.
One of your hands was now clutching your chest, right around your heart.
“Dammit, Sunwoo. Announce yourself, please.”
Sunwoo chuckled. “I did. You were in your own world.”
A blush ran up your face as you shoved him, heading towards the front of the castle grounds to see him off. The younger boy caught his footing, catching up to you rather quickly as you spoke again.
“Please, try to keep an eye on Juyeon.” You told him.
Sunwoo pushed open the front doors of the castle, letting in an immense amount of sunlight that casted shadows all over the walls. You walked him to his horse that was waiting for him as he looked at you.
“I’m only a line of communication. I’m not staying.”
You huffed. “Then, tell him…tell him I love him. Please?”
Sunwoo could only smile as he nodded, pulling himself onto the black steed. You always admired Sunwoo’s horse. His being the fastest, and prettiest, made him perfect as a communicator.
Sunwoo pulled the reins slightly, making the horse turn around. His lack of answer made you antsy as you watched him trot off.
“Sunwoo!” You yelled out.
“I’ll tell him!”
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The days dragged on after Sunwoo’s departure. You weren’t sure how far out the squad was but considering you were now on day two of no Sunwoo, you kind of figured they were pretty far. The castle was on high alert with the threat and the best guards being out to handle the situation. Juyeon’s words continued to rattle your brain as they were beginning to become the only reason to get you through each day. You checked the front of the castle grounds religiously, even venturing out farther than allowed, making your right hand drag you back onto the grounds.
“Your highness, we mustn’t go past the gates. It's too dangerous.” She said softly, looping her arm through yours to walk you back towards the castle. “Don’t worry so much. He’ll be back.”
Your head snapped towards her as you stopped the both of you. “What?”
She giggled. “You aren’t exactly masters at hiding the way you look at each other.”
You let out a groan, bringing your hand to your head. “Jesus, does everyone in this castle know about us?”
She could only laugh. “Not everyone. Obviously his fellow guards found out, but those faded marks on your collarbone,” Her slim finger was pointed towards your upper chest, making you unravel your arm from her as you pulled your garments closer to your neck. “They give it away. Coupled with the fact that he’s usually sporting the same marks.”
You had never been so embarrassed in your life.
“And here I was thinking we were hiding them.”
“Don’t worry your highness. I won’t tell anyone. Juyeon makes you happy. That’s all that matters to me.” She told you.
You smiled at her, relooping your arms. “Okay then. What about you? Anyone interesting in your life?”
She stopped, smiling at the grass beneath her feet as she looked off in the distance. You couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips from her reaction to your question. She opened her mouth to speak before gasping, pointing off in the direction you just came from. Whipping around, you heard galloping that was getting continuously louder. You felt a tug as your right hand began to pull you.
“Wait,” You told her.
“Your highness, we don’t know who it is!” She replied quickly.
You pull from her grasp as the horse, Sunwoo’s horse, is now in focus. You let out a sigh of relief, happy to finally have some sort of news before seeing the state of the horse and the boy on it. Both were cut up and bleeding with Sunwoo looking like he might all but fall off the horse if it wasn’t for someone tying him on him. You stopped the horse, reaching up for Sunwoo.
“My sword,” He wheezed out. “Cut the ropes.”
You turned to your right hand. “Go get help!”
She nodded as you grabbed the sword that was strapped to his side, using the blade to cut the ropes on both sides, cutting your hand in the process. You try to (gently) pull Sunwoo from his horse, causing the boy to topple off onto the grass. He lets out a loud scream of pain as you kneel next to him.
“Sunwoo, what happened? Who did this?” Your mind was racing with questions.
Sunwoo could barely keep his eyes open, the pain being too much for the boy. “Ambushed. Barely made it out.”
“What happened with everyone else? What happened with Juyeon?”
You were pulled from the boy’s side as your father and Eric tended to him. Your mother pulled you up, keeping your sister and New at a safe distance. More men helped out with Sunwoo as New left your sister with you and your mother to tend to the hurt horse. Your father charged past, leading the way for Sunwoo to be carried back into the castle.
“Is he going to be okay?” You asked your mother.
“I’m not sure.” The queen said.
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The castle was quiet as Sunwoo got worked on. All that could be heard were his cries of pain that brought tears to your eyes. They kept around the clock care for him for the next 24 hours as you kept yourself locked in your room. You had so many questions. Who did this? He was just a kid, so why would they hurt him? More importantly, what happened to the rest of them? What happened to Juyeon?
You watched the sun set on another day, now having no line of communication to give you any sort of relief. You felt your eyelids grow heavy as someone knocked on the thick wood doors of your chambers. Jumping slightly, you moved slowly towards the door, not wanting to hear anymore news about anything tonight.
“Eric,” You said surprised. “What are you doing over here?”
Eric spoke in a hushed town. “I had to come this late, so you wouldn’t get caught. Sunwoo is asking for you.”
You nodded, now being fully awake as you let the boy lead you to Sunwoo’s location. He stopped in front of the double doors of an abandoned room where your family basically stored stuff away that was used for balls. He pushed the door open slowly to contain any noises that might come from the old wood. Eric looked around before nodding at you, putting a hand on your lower back to push you into the room. He closed the door behind you to stay posted outside as you let your eyes adjust to the dimly lit room. The only light was coming from the oil lamps lit throughout the room. Sunwoo laid on a cot in the back of the room, his bare torso all wrapped in bandages that were starting to stain from his blood.
Making your way over to the boy, you knelt next to his head as you whispered into the dark room. “Sunwoo,”
The boy’s eyes opened slightly as he squinted before slowly turning his head. He hissed slightly from his own movement as he looked at you. His hair was sticking to his face, sweat lining his entire body. He was starting to come down with a fever.
“Your highness,” He breathed out, just barely pulling sound out of his mouth with his words. You leaned in. “Juyeon,”
You felt your blood run cold. “What? What happened to Juyeon? Is he okay?”
The boy swallowed. “As far as I know, but this situation is more serious than we previously anticipated.”
You stayed quiet, prompting the boy to continue.
“You,” His stomach contracted, making him wince as he moved just slightly. “You need to tell your father.”
A confused look crossed your face before you realized what he was getting at. “Sunwoo, I can’t.”
He gingerly shook his head. “You have to.”
“He could lose everything, Sunwoo.”
This time he snapped his head in your direction, ignoring the pain in a means to get his point across. “And yet you two still are together. If you really care about him, you’ll tell your father.”
His words stung, making you turn from him. “How can you say that? You know how much I care about Juyeon.”
“Then tell him. They are prying information from us out there.” Sunwoo countered.
“What do you mean?”
Sunwoo sighed, taking a deep breath. “They weren’t looking to kill us when I got there. They were looking to kidnap us. Torture us as a way to get information about the king, about you.”
You froze. “Me? Why me?”
Before he could answer, you heard shouting. Standing up quickly, you ran to the door opening it fully to an empty hallway. Eric was nowhere to be found as you closed the door, hearing footsteps rounding the corner. Your right hand came full speed right in front of you, stopping just before crashing into you. You grunted softly as she spoke.
“Your highness, the guards, they’re back!” She said quickly.
Your eyes widened as you took off in the opposite direction from which she came from. Heading towards the front of the castle, you noticed your father and mother already out there. Other staff members surrounded the area, watching your father debrief the guards as you let your legs carry you as fast as they could.
When you got to the front door, you stopped. Your heart beating out of your chest as you pushed the doors open. You started the trek down the stairs before stopping. Your father and mother both turned to you, Sangyeon standing in front of both of them. Your mother made her way to you, walking quickly to your side. It was at this moment, you realized that only Sangyeon and Changmin were back. Both badly beaten and covered in blood that wasn’t their own.
“Sweetheart, you should go back inside.” She said quickly.
Walking past her, you headed straight for Sangyeon who was in deep conversation with your father. He eyed you as you got closer to him, watching your every move.
“Your highness,” He started as you interrupted him.
“Where is he?”
Your father looked between the two of you. “Where is who?”
Sangyeon shook his head. “Don’t do this right now.”
“What are you two talking about?”
This time you shook your head. “No, let’s do this right now. What happened? Where is he?”
Sangyeon looked down at his boots before speaking. “He and the others were taken hostage. Changmin and I, we barely escaped.”
“You left them,” You said softly.
“No.” Sangyeon replied. “No, that’s not true. I needed more help, that’s why I came back. That’s why we came back.
He points between himself and Changmin as he turns back to your father. Not bothering to listen, you walked up to Changmin. He kept his head down as you whispered to him.
“Do you know where they are being kept?” You asked him quietly.
Changmin lifted his head, cuts on his lip and nose becoming visible to you. He nods slowly.
You grab his arm, pulling him towards the castle. “Let’s go.”
Your mother stopped you. “What are you doing?”
“Helping.” You said, not bothering to stop.
Changmin kept in stride with your fast steps as you pulled him into the castle, dragging him down the hallway towards Sunwoo’s room. Sunwoo turned his head as the door opened, trying to lift himself as he immediately recognized the person behind you.
“Hyung,” Sunwoo said. “You’re alive!”
Changmin pushed past you, kneeling before the younger boy as he tended to him. You peered through a partially covered window, seeing your father still talking with Sangyeon. Letting Changmin talk with Sunwoo, you moved around the room, finding a sword and riding gear for yourself. This caught both the boys' attention as Changmin spoke.
“What are you thinking about doing?” Changmin asked softly.
“You’re taking me to Juyeon.”
Changmin stood, looking at you like you were crazy. He watched you move around, gathering everything you needed as he tried to find the right words.
“Your h-highness,” He stammered out. “I really don’t think-,”
“I don’t care what you think! You are the only one that isn’t beaten or bruised to a bloody pulp. Sangyeon sure as hell isn’t going to take me, and my father will never let me go. I’m making this decision on my own. Besides, we need to get the others back.” You stopped, momentarily wondering whether you and Changmin would be enough.
You had no idea what kind of state the others would be in, especially with Sunwoo’s condition and the way Sangyeon and Changmin looked now.
As if reading your mind, Changmin took a step towards you, leaving Sunwoo’s side. “Your highness, there’s no way we can get through. Not two of us.”
You nodded at words, agreeing immediately. “Then we take help.”
Changmin looked on, confused as you headed towards the door. Quickly turning to Sunwoo, he whispered something to him as he jogged after you. The castle was quiet, everyone still in shock of only two of the royal guards returning as they stood outside. You took off towards your sister’s room, Changmin hot on your trail. Your footsteps echoed off the walls, alerting the boy posted outside your sister’s door. He stood before recognizing the boy behind you.
“Q,” Chanhee started, calling out to the boy with a nickname. “You’re back?”
Changmin stopped as did you. “You need to come with us.”
Chanhee looked confused, as you spoke this time. “We need to get the others. My father is going to take his time with Sangyeon, and that’s exactly what the others don’t have. We need all the help we can get.”
The boy cocked his head slightly, knowing the trouble he could get into if he disobeyed the King’s orders. Chanhee sighed, looking back at the doors he was in front of. He had promised your little sister he’d accompany her to breakfast in the morning. Clearly, that wasn’t going to happen.
“What do you need me to do?” Chanhee asked, stepping forward.
As you three hatched out a game plan, the youngest guard rounded the corner. The first thing Eric noticed was the gear you had on.
“What’s going on?” Eric asked.
“We’re going to get the others! Are you in?” You asked very straightforwardly.
Eric thought about it for a split second before giving you a nod of his head. “Let’s take the back gate, though. They’ve moved all the horses back there.”
You all nodded, heading towards the back exit of the castle by the greenhouse. As you quickly and quietly walked down the corridor, you noticed a figure by the door.
“Sunwoo, why are you out of bed?” Changmin asked.
The boy was using the wall to hold himself up as he dragged himself across the wall towards you. He pulled at your belt, unsheathing your sword from its case.
“Take mine.” He said softly, tucking the larger blade into your case with your help.
He pushed his full body weight into the wall, slowly sliding down it as he was now sitting on the floor. You and Changmin helped steady him before he reached up to grasp both of your shoulders and Changmin’s.
“Bring them back. Alive.” He said, barely above a whisper.
Changmin looked from Sunwoo to you as you nodded.
“As long as you stay alive to see them when we get back.” You countered.
A small, sly smile made its way to Sunwoo’s face as he nodded. “I’ll try my best, your highness.”
He let his arms drop as someone yelled. “Hey!”
You called out to Eric and Chanhee as the four of you took off out the doors. Just like Eric had said, four steeds stood by the greenhouse, still saddled up. You all climbed onto a horse, catching a glimpse of the person that yelled.
“Sangyeon,” You whispered to yourself as Changmin got his horse untied.
“Come on! This way!” Changmin yelled.
The hooves of the four horses pounded the ground as Sangyeon ran out of the castle.
“Your highness! Y/N!” Sangyeon screamed.
He continued to yell, but the sound became background noise as you let Changmin lead the way. He went full steam ahead to get out of the castle grounds quickly, only pulling back on the speed when he felt as though you were all in the clear. As you rode through the woods, the cool air whipped through your hair. It was the only thing calming you as you let the decisions you just made wash over you. Feeling an impending wave of anxiety creep up, you started to get nervous.
“Let’s slow up right here.” Changmin said softly.
You were the last person to stop, riding forwards just slightly as Changmin addressed you guys.
“We needed to be prepared. What you guys are about to see, it’s gruesome.”
You all nodded. Changmin continued to explain everything as you tried to keep up with what he was saying. His words started to all blur together as your mind started to wander.
The forest you were in started to change around you, the men in front of you disappearing as you closed your eyes to take in a breath.
“Aren’t you supposed to be meeting the guests?” A familiar voice says from behind you.
You turn quickly, smiling almost immediately. “Juyeon!”
He gives you a smile as you run to him, letting your full body weight crash into the boy. Juyeon grunts, letting his arms encircle your waist. He leans down to place a gentle kiss on your lips, making you hum.
You couldn’t believe he was in front of you right now. You nudge your nose against his, letting your forehead lean into him as he speaks.
“Someone is excited to see me!” A chuckle escaped his lips as he spoke.
You looked up at him. “You’re okay,”
“Yeah, I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be?” Juyeon asked.
You furrowed your eyebrows at his question. “Well, the threat to the kingdom. You had to neutralize it.”
The guard looked down at you confused. “What threat? No one has threatened the kingdom since we’ve arrived to protect you and your family. Are you sure you are okay?”
Feeling something cool and wet against your skin, you look down. Your hands that were set on each side of his lower chest were now covered in blood. Eyes widening in horror, you jumped back from the boy.
“What’s wrong?” Juyeon asks.
Too scared to speak, you continue to back away from Juyeon.
“Your highness, your highness…”
“Your highness? Your highness!”
You jumped as a pair of hands grabbed a hold of you. You look around you, realizing that you’re still in the forest. You look down at the hands holding you before coming face to face with Changmin. He’s looking at you with grave concern as you speak.
“What happened?”
Changmin looks at the guys behind him before turning back to you. “Your highness, I was explaining what the battlefield we’re about to cross looks like. I had asked you a question, but you kind of went mute on us. Almost like you were trapped in a daze. We couldn’t get you out of it.”
You nodded, trying to find the right words before Eric spoke. “Do you guys hear that?”
You all silenced yourselves, letting the sounds of the rustling leaves make their way into your ears.
“I don’t hear anything.” Chanhee said.
“No, no. Listen. Just listen.” Eric replied.
That’s when you all heard it. The faint sound of pounding? No, galloping.
Changmin pushed himself back, so he was fully sitting on his horse as he whispered. “Everyone hide, now!”
You all split into four different directions as the galloping started to get closer. Someone had followed you, and you had a pretty decent idea of who it was.
“Your highness,” Sangyeon called out. “Changmin!”
You all stayed quiet, the darkness, coupled with the full, large trees helped to hide you.
“I know you guys are out there. You need to come with me back to the castle, now! King’s orders.” Sangyeon said.
The only sound he could make out was the loud rustling of leaves from the strong gusts of wind.
Sangyeon sighed. “Y/N, come on. You took battle training when you were younger, but you know you don’t stand a chance against these enemies.”
His words struck a nerve in you. You knew he was right, but you didn’t want to admit that. You wanted to prove him wrong.
“I’m not heading back to the castle without Juyeon or the others.”
Sangyeon’s head moved in the direction your voice came from as he willed his horse to trot slowly towards the sound. “We’re going to get the others, but you have to give us time.”
You shook your head. “They don’t have time, Sangyeon.”
This time, you pulled yourself out of the thick brush. Pulling your horse behind you. Sangyeon let out a sigh of relief, eyeing you up and down to make sure you weren’t hurt.
He hopped down from his horse and held out his hand. “Come on. Let me take you back home.”
You shook your head. Sangyeon was starting to get frustrated by your stubbornness. He really needed to get you back to the castle, not just you but everyone else. He was the leader, and if he failed, the King would have his head. You, of all people, knew that.
Sangyeon let his hand drop, looking down at his dirty boots as he took in a breath. “Your highness,”
“I’m not going back with you.”
“You have too!” He yelled.
Sangyeon was never someone to raise his voice, so to say you were surprised was an understatement. He took your silence as an opportunity to calm himself before speaking again.
“Your highness, I can get in a lot of trouble if you don’t come back to the castle with me. All of us can.” He said loudly, knowing the others were just as close by as you were.
You shrugged. “Then it looks like you aren’t going back.”
Sangyeon closed his eyes, bringing his gloved hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Why are you being so stubborn?”
“Why are you being so adamant?”
“Because I made a promise.” Sangyeon said.
Promise? What promise?
“A promise to who? My father? If that’s the case, it’s broken.” You told him.
He shook his head. “A promise to Juyeon.”
He let his head drop as he closed his eyes. “When we got separated, he made me swear to take care of you, keep you safe. Y/N, he sacrificed himself for us. For Changmin and I. The two of us, we had the chance to leave, and we were going to give it up to help the others.”
“But Juyeon didn’t let you.” You finished for him.
Sangyeon could only nod. It made sense. Juyeon was nothing if not noble. He was willing to die for you and his brothers. You closed your eyes, smiling slightly. Even when he wasn’t around he was finding ways to keep you out of harm's way.
“I have to keep you safe.”
You nodded, calling out to the rest of the guys.
Eric peeked out from your left, as Changmin and Chanhee came from the other side of the pathway. Sangyeon looked at the three boys before chuckling slightly.
You took a step towards Sangyeon, your hand tightening on the reins of your horse as you spoke. “I still can’t go back with you.”
Sangyeon went to protest before you interrupted him. “Sangyeon, come with us. You are the best in hand to hand combat.”
The guards with you nodded enthusiastically, trying to convince their leader to join them, knowing his strength would be greatly appreciated.
Sangyeon shook his head. “I can’t, and you know that. I need to keep you safe. I need to get you back to the castle.”
“You really want to keep me safe and keep your promise to Juyeon, then you’ll come with us. You never break promises, and you know you won’t go back to the castle if I’m not with you. My father would have your head.”
Sangyeon let out a frustrated sigh as he looked at the hopeful faces of his members. He turned back to you as you cocked an eyebrow at him, crossing your arms over his chest. If the situation wasn’t so dire, Sangyeon wouldn’t help but laugh at the way you look. He was convinced that you had never looked more like your father. You were going to make a great ruler, that’s for sure.
“Alright look, if I come, and that’s a big if, you need to listen to me. All of you.” Sangyeon said, moving his body to point at every one of you. “We need to stick together, and not lose our heads. These guys, they are tough. Now we’ve taken out a majority of them, but the few that are left have the guys locked away in their own bunker. Once we locate it, we need to work specifically on freeing the guys, not fighting. Understood?”
Everyone nodded as Sangyeon helped you onto your horse, handing you reins he had slipped from your hand. As you got comfortable, he spoke again.
“Changmin, lead the way.” The older boy said as Changmin hopped onto his horse. The other two boys sprung into action, following along as you guys picked back up. Sangyeon kept an eye out, looking around carefully as you made your way out of the forest and through the plethora of bodies.
You never doubted your father when it came to picking people who could keep the kingdom safe, and now you had to make sure to thank him if you ever saw him again. The wasteland of death that you were walking through made you appreciate sitting in the castle all day long and being roped into stupid balls and useless meetings. The scene in front of you was nothing short of something out of a horror movie. Sangyeon had taken the lead off Changmin and was keeping you guys at a steady pace, looking over the bodies on the ground.
“Watch out for supplies or clues. Anything that can help us find out why they would take them.” Sangyeon said quietly.
You rode in the middle of the pack, Changmin off to your side. He was oddly quiet as you grabbed his attention.
“Q,” The nickname made him turn to you. “Are you okay?”
Changmin gave you a sad smile. “It wasn’t supposed to go this way. No one was supposed to get abducted. Sunwoo wasn’t going to get hurt.”
Shaking your head, you reached out to pat his shoulder gently. “You can’t blame yourself. You guys are trained for all sorts of situations, but something will always happen that rattles you. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from being in the royal family, it’s to expect the unexpected.”
“You can say that again.” Chanhee said from behind the two of you.
You both looked back at him. “Your mother tells me all the time that she wakes up anticipating something crazy to happen.”
You smiled at his comment that made the other men with you laugh softly. The conversation flowed a bit more after that. Different battle stories being brought up to pass the time. Eric brought up one of Sangyeon’s most impressive feats that he loved to exaggerate.
“I didn’t slay that bear by myself, Eric.” Sangyeon said with a shake of his head.
Eric scoffed. “Come on, hyung. You’re too humble. Sure, Younghoon and Hyunjae were there, but most of the damage was at the hands of your blade.”
You let out a breathless laugh before pointing. “Look.”
Sangyeon brought his head back to the front as he stopped his horse, prompting the other four of you to stop as well. Sangyeon climbed off of his horse as he took a few steps forward.
“That’s it.” Changmin said quietly, almost as if he was afraid someone would hear him.
The building was old and rundown. You were surprised it hadn’t caved in yet, but you weren’t holding your breath.
Sangyeon turned to you guys as he spoke. “We need to hatch a plan. By now, they’ve probably split them into different rooms. This place is bigger than you think so I’ll split off by myself. Eric and Chanhee you two split up together, and Changmin you know to keep Y/N in your sights.”
Everyone nodded at their assignments as you let Changmin help you off the horse. He quickly pulled you around the back side of the bunker while the other three split off to different sides. The wood door in the back was broken at the bottom, prompting Changmin to speak.
“There. We can get in through the bottom of the door. I’ll go first.”
He led the way, dropping to the ground to crawl under the broken wood. You heard him draw his sword before whispering.
“It’s safe, your highness.”
You took that as your cue to slide under the door, scraping your face against the hard concrete. The stinging from your cheek being scraped hurt, but you didn’t let it bother you as you pulled yourself up, pulling Sunwoo’s sword out of its sheath. Changmin gave you a nod as he took careful steps. He was making sure to check his surroundings as you both rounded a corner. The place was eerily quiet. There were only long hallways, making the bunker feel like more of a maze than an actual bunker. Changmin was careful to drag the blade of his sword, as quietly as he could, across the walls each time you took a turn.
“In case we have to turn back.” He told you.
As you took another turn, you heard something.
“Wait,” You called out to Changmin. “I hear something.”
Changmin stopped as you both listened.
“Someone’s talking.”
Changmin took a quiet step towards where the sound was coming from as his eyes widened. “It’s Jacob-hyung!”
Changmin took off towards the direction of his voice, making quite the racket as he continued to move quickly. You were beginning to have trouble keeping up with him before you stopped to catch your breath. That’s when you heard it.
More voices. Muffled, but one of them stood out to you.
“I’m not telling you anything. You’ll have to kill me.”
Juyeon.
You followed his voice. The strain in it made your heart squeeze in your chest as you landed in front of two metal doors. Taking a small step forward, you laid your hands on them, bringing your ear to listen.
“Your majesty has invested a lot in his kids to take over when he passes. The oldest has the most power. Just give us what we want, and we’ll let you go. We hate to have to kill the King’s best guard.” An unfamiliar voice said.
Your heart pounded in your chest as you stepped back. You had to help him! Letting your hands slide down the cool metal, you gripped the handles of the doors before ripping them open. Everyone in the room froze.
The men in front of you were dirty. Faces and clothes covered in muck and blood. Dirt and grime built up under their fingernails. They had small blades equipped to their sides as one of them had Juyeon on his knees with the blade to the side of his throat.
“Y/N,” Juyeon breathed out, eyes widening.
“Your highness,” The man holding Juyeon down spoke. “What a pleasure.”
He grinned, giving way to a nasty, greasy smile. His teeth were black and rotted, holes on just about every tooth that was visible.
“We’ve been waiting for you.” The man spoke again.
You eyed Juyeon. One of his eyes was swollen shut. Cuts on his cheek, nose, and lip all swollen. His clothes were badly ripped with dried blood stains and dirty caked all over them.
“Don’t hurt him.” You said softly.
The men started to laugh as Juyeon attempted to free himself, only for the man to push the blade closer to his neck.
Juyeon stopped struggling as he swallowed, looking over you. He couldn’t believe you were in front of him, and while he was grateful you were okay, he was so afraid they would hurt you.
“Y/N, leave now.”
“What do you want?” You asked the man with the blade.
“Stop asking questions, just leave.”
The man tilted his head, the grin never leaving his face. “You. You don’t even know how much money someone will pay for you. Dead or alive.”
One of his men took a hold of Juyeon and the blade as he took a step towards you.
“Stay away!” Juyeon yelled, beginning to struggle again.
The man stopped in front of you. He was much taller than you, causing you to crane your head up at him. He reached one of his dirty hands up to your hair, sliding a loose strand behind your ear.
“I’ll do whatever you want,” You started.
“Y/N, no!”
“Just, please, don’t hurt him. He means the world to me. I can’t live if he doesn’t. I’ll give you everything I have, every secret I know about the kingdom. You have to let Juyeon go, though.” You told the man quietly.
He looked over you. “Sounds tempting.”
Before he could speak again, one of the men yelled out in pain before dropping to the ground. He was bleeding from his back, an arrow sticking out.
“What the hell?” One of the men exclaimed.
“Someone freed the archer!”
Everything happened so quickly. Multiple men dropped, all from arrows as Juyeon tripped the man holding him. Knocking him out, he grabbed ahold of the blade, cutting the rope around his hands before standing.
The man in front of you grabbed you, pulling you into him as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, trapping you against him. He moved to a corner away from the window all the men got shot from. He pulled out another blade from his boot, holding it to your neck. Juyeon stayed where he was as he watched the man.
“You’re outnumbered. My crew came back for me. It’s only a matter of time before they close in on us. Especially if they freed Hyunjae.” Juyeon told the man as he took a step closer.
The man brought the blade to your side, pushing on it just slightly to apply pressure, making you gasp. Juyeon stopped.
“Hyung!”
Eric’s voice boomed through the hollow walls of the bunker as multiple footsteps echoed throughout the room. Soon all the royal guards had gathered in the room. They stood by Juyeon’s side as the man spoke.
“I’ll do it! I’m all that’s left! I have nothing to live for! But killing the oldest blood of the King, I’ll be legendary. Don’t think I won’t do it!”
Sangyeon and Hyunjae were the last to enter as Sangyeon drew his sword while Hyunjae drew an arrow. Both boys stood at attention, armed and ready to take down the man holding you. A standoff had presumably taken place. Everyone was waiting for someone to make the first move. That’s when you felt the blade dip through the material of your riding gear, beginning to pierce your skin. He was slowly adding more pressure so as to not draw attention to the fact that he was stabbing you. You had to find a way to free yourself.
You moved both your hands up to the arm that was holding you to his chest as you locked eyes with Hyunjae. Your movement made all the boys step forward as the man pulled back as best he could, pushing the blade a little farther into you. You whimpered before scratching at the man’s hand, giving Hyunjae a nod.
Hyunjae let the arrow he had drawn go as it hit the man square in the middle of his hand. The man yelled out in pain as you pulled away and dropped to the floor. Juyeon copied your movements, meeting you halfway as he pulled you into his arms. Hyunjae quickly drew another arrow before letting it fly, effectively silencing the yelling man. You looked over at his lifeless body, watching Sangyeon and Hyunjae make sure he was dead as someone pulled the blade out of your side.
You gasped as you turned in Juyeon’s arms. Younghoon was on one knee, hand held tight to your side to slow down the bleeding.
“Hyung, we have to move now. This cut is deep!” Younghoon told him.
He helped Juyeon lift you as you all worked your way back through the bunker to the exit. You went out the same way you came in thanks to Changmin’s markings on the walls. When you exited, a brigade of soldiers stood outside the bunker with your father at the helm. The men tapped at his shoulder before he turned, watching his guards carry you out.
You clung tightly to Juyeon, who did the same as he went straight to a free horse, loading you and himself up on the saddle. Your father pushed through the guards, shooting a glance at Sangyeon as he tried to catch up with Juyeon who was more worried about the deep cut on your side than debriefing with the King.
“Juyeon, let me,”
“No!” He said before taking off.
Juyeon would deal with the consequences of talking back later. He needed to get you to safety. As he rode, he continued to sneak glances down at you, not wanting to take his eyes off you. He needed you to stay awake. Just until he got you to the castle, but you were losing so much blood.
“Just stay with me, okay? We’re almost there!” Juyeon said as he willed the horse to go faster.
You figured you had enough strength to speak, and just as you opened your mouth, you blacked out.
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When you came to, it was dark. The only light coming from a small candle lit by the bed you were in. Your eyes took a minute to adjust as you looked around the room. You were home. You were in your room. You continued to look around to be sure before seeing a figure standing by your window, a figure you recognized all too well.
“Juyeon,” You rasped out.
Juyeon turned on his heels quickly, eyes widening as he strided over to the side of your bed. He dropped to his knees, grabbing your hand as he gently kissed your knuckles.
He gave you a soft smile. “Hi. You’re awake.”
You looked over his face as you frowned. The swelling had gone down, blacks, blues, and discolored greens decorated his face.
“Don’t worry. It hurts worse than it looks.”
You scoffed. “That doesn’t make me feel better, Juyeon.”
The boy chuckled. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”
It was at this moment you realized that you had been out for quite some time.
“How long have I been,” Juyeon interrupted.
“Three days.”
Your eyes widened as you tried to sit up, letting out a gasp at the sharp pain that reverberated throughout your body from your side. Juyeon gently stopped you, helping you lay back down.
“Don’t try to move. Your stitches could break.” Juyeon whispered.
You pulled your hand from the boy’s grasp, gently cupping his cheek to keep from hurting him. Juyeon didn’t let you be too gentle as he took the feather-like touch as an opportunity to nuzzle into your hand.
“You’re okay? Everyone is okay?” You whispered out into the dark room.
The candlelight flickered, casting shadows across Juyeon’s face as he nodded. “Everyone is okay.”
You let out a deep sigh of relief as you finally relaxed. You looked up at the ceiling before looking back at the boy.
He had a ghost of a smile on his face as you spoke. “What?”
He shrugged. “You saved me. You risked your life…for me.”
You nodded. “Of course I did! You’re the love of my life. I’d give up everything for you. Even if it means not being a royal anymore.”
The boy leaned down to gently peck your lips, but you wanted more. You grasped his face, pulling him closer as you laid a more full kiss to his lips. At first, Juyeon tensed up, not wanting to hurt you. Then he relaxed, letting himself get lost in the kiss. He pulled away, leaning his forehead against yours as he chuckled to himself.
“I missed you so much.” Juyeon said.
Pecking his lips once more, you grinned. “I missed you more.”
“I’m still not happy that you risked your life to come save me, though.”
You shrugged. “What is it that you said before you left? Like a moth to a flame, right?”
Juyeon let his eyes close as he let out a breathless laugh. “Touché.”
Juyeon gently crawled into bed with you, maneuvering you around into a comfy position so that he could hold you without hurting you. You guys laid quietly on the bed, just holding each other as the morning sun peeked into the room.
Juyeon looked towards the window, letting out a yawn as he got up.
“Wait,” You said, keeping a firm grasp on his large hand. “Help me up.”
He hesitated. “I really think you should stay in bed.”
“Lee Juyeon, I’ve been in this bed for three days. It’s time for me to get up. I won’t get better laying down all day every day.”
The boy shook his head, cursing your stubbornness as he helped you to your feet. You were wearing clean cotton clothing that was soft to the touch. The bandage wrapped tightly around your abdomen, moving ever so slightly catching your stitches. The slight pinch made you wince as you took a deep breath before looking up at the boy.
Even like this, Juyeon was in complete awe of you. You were amazing. The boy let go of your hands to cup your face, wanting to give you another kiss before a knock sounded at the door.
You called out to the person as the door pushed open. Hyunjae popped his head in as he smiled, bowing to you.
“Your highness, good to see you out of bed.” Hyunjae told you. “Juyeon, his majesty would like a word with you.”
Juyeon stared at the boy for a moment before nodding. He looked at you as he gave you a small smile. You shook your head, going to speak before he stopped you.
“It’s okay.” He whispered.
His hands dropped from your face, to his sides as he headed for the door. Hyunjae gave him a sad smile as he patted his back. The moment he exited the room, your heart dropped. You really thought your father would spare him since he saved you. Hyunjae looked back at you as he walked over, helping you sit on the bed.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. We tried to change his mind.” Hyunjae said softly.
You could only nod. “Could you help me to the greenhouse? I just want to be outside and alone for a moment.”
Hyunjae nodded, standing and holding out his hand for you to take. He walked you to the greenhouse, opening the door as you let go of his hand. You sat on one of the benches, breathing in the fresh air as you awaited the dreadful news praying that your father would at least let Juyeon say goodbye to you.
The flowers were in full bloom. Pretty peonies, tulips, and lavenders decorated the greenhouse. Different fruit trees grow throughout the grounds. Your mother took pride in making the greenhouse beautiful. She had her reasons for picking each plant, specifically the peonies because they were able to withstand even the harshest weather conditions, constantly growing back no matter what. It was a peaceful oasis to escape to when things became too much. That’s where you would always end up, and where Juyeon always knew to look for you first.
The footsteps behind you brought back all too familiar memories as you shut your eyes tightly. You kept them close as the footsteps got closer, practically closing in on you. They stopped behind you before you felt the bench shift just slightly.
“One day I’m going to hide somewhere different to get away from everything. When you come looking for me here first, I’ll be gone.” You said softly.
The laugh you loved so much filled the large greenhouse. “That will certainly be a first. It’s too bad I’m always one step ahead of you. I always know where you are and where you’re going before you do. Part of my job.”
His statement made you let out a breathless laugh as you opened your eyes. When you looked at him, he was already staring at you. His cat-like eyes showed nothing but love.
“How much trouble did you get into?”
Juyeon smiled as he grabbed your hand. “A lot. I was relieved of my duties,”
You felt your shoulders slump. So much for holding out hope. You had hoped your father would be lenient on Juyeon like he was with Sangyeon.
“I’m sorry, Juyeon. I’m so sorry.” You whispered.
Juyeon chuckled. “Don’t be. He already got me another job.”
You smiled sadly. “Where is he sending you to?”
Juyeon let out a breath as he began to grin. “I have to be the head guard for this spoiled royal brat. Follow them around, watch their every move. Make sure they stay out of trouble and obey their father.”
His last comment made your head shoot in his direction. “You, you’re not leaving?”
Juyeon shook his head, dark fringe falling in front of his eyes as you jumped into his arms. Your weight hit him like a truck making him grunt as he wrapped his arms around you.
“You’re stuck with me, your highness.” Juyeon said as he nuzzled his face into your neck.
You felt him leave soft, feather-like kisses on your neck before lifting his head to peck your cheek, then your temple. You pulled away, pulling the boy into a deep kiss. He held onto you as tight as he could without hurting you as you both pulled apart.
“I love you. No one on this planet can keep me from you. I hope you know that.” Juyeon said with the utmost confidence.
Nodding, you pecked his lips. “I know. And I love you too.”
He went to pull you in for another kiss before you turned your head, making his lips land on your cheek.
“What was that for?”
“Lee Juyeon, I am not a brat.” You exclaimed.
A big, sly smile made its way to Juyeon’s face as he tilted his head. “You most certainly are a brat, but that’s okay because I want you to be my brat until the peonies stop growing back.”
“That might take a while,” You teased.
He shrugged, pecking your lips. “The rest of your life okay?”
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thank you so much for reading! like and reblog if you enjoyed and let me know how you liked it! feedback is always welcome🤍🤍
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littleroaes · 1 year ago
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( 🌷 ) ❀˖° — ‘ ACQUAINTANCES ‘ — a list of my MOOTS ( writers and non ) who I have interacted with and fic RECS.
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( 🌷 ) ❀˖° — AUTHORS NOTE : a list of my acquaintances here on tumblr! as I’m very timid, I don’t have too many interactions with some users. but the net of people here is very sweet and sincere. please please give them love!
I will update it as I get to know new people, read past works/ new works!
• LAST UPDATE : oh my god! it’s done! I think I have gathered all? don’t feel afraid to comment or something else if I missed you! It’s pretty rushed at parts, but I’ll improve on it, for the time being, I’m released it’s finally up!
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➵ @blue-rainydays 💙
➵ @cloverdaisies m.list personal rec ➤ HEY CHAT! ∩^ω^∩ ↳ no one loves this fic like I love this fic! reread it a lot because it genuinely makes me so happy! i wrote it in my reblog but im so sad this yn and hj arent together lol. i would be the biggest minecraft fan if they were real →
➵ @cupidjyu m.list personal rec ➤ he’s hopeless! ↳ the fluffiest fluff that has ever fluffed! kicked my feet all the way through! juyeon's character is so entertaning to read! → other: detention for romance
➵ @everynewiee m.list ( @adorablehyunjae ) personal rec ➤ Honey - Dew Cat Cafe ↳ so cute! juyeon wears an apron and owns a cat(do I need to say more?) their pet bring them together!au !!! →
@floatingpluto
➵ @from-izzy m.list personal rec ➤ this summer… ↳ hyunjae is so patient! real love im telling you! that giddy feeling of when you feel special! It's what it gives! I wish to have someone like this hyunjae →
➵ @haet-sal m.list personal rec ➤ Cinderella Boy ↳ really creative fic! i loved the concept, had me in my seat the entire time! youre gonna feel so bad for juyeon though →
➵ @heemingyu m.list personal rec ➤ Serenade ↳ so feel good! I absolutely adore eric's and sunwoo's dynamic in this one! eric is down so bad, and i love it! → other: Rainy Days
➵ @hyungseos-cafe m.list personal rec ➤ the thought of you ↳ love this series! very easy to read since all of them are pretty short, but each one is so distinct and cute! I especially like changmins and erics! →
➵ @juyeonszn m.list (@fawnieszn/ @jungwonszn @yeonjunszn @eunseokszn )
personal rec ➤ BLAH BLAH ↳ I feel like there’s a lot of coincidences between me and this fic lol. but I do truly love it. jacob is 🫠🫠, basically all fawns fics make me feel 🫠🫠 lol →
➵ @kimsohn m.list personal rec ➤ polaroid & hearts on your sleeve ↳ polaroid is such a cute one! makes me want a jacob for myself even more! hearts on your sleeve is heart-aching, but I find it so creative! →
➵ @kpop17
➵ @leaz-kpop-life
➵ @onceuponabloom tag system! personal rec ➤ taste your lipgloss ↳ I’m so bad at describing things! but kicking my legs! very typical flirty, oops, heart fluttering vibe but I love it! →
➵ @o-onikix m.list personal rec ➤ Enchanted ↳ was some time since I read it, but I remember enjoying it! First time I wish to end a relationship with hyunjae →
@seolboba m.list personal rec ➤ 8:36 AM ↳ not tbz, but very cute! I really like rin (oc)! though I’m a kevrin stan, I really like Felix and her in this one. chans immediate leadership/ family ship is amazing! →
➵ @sungbeam m.list personal rec ➤ ain’t no romeo ↳ listend to it in speechify! a fic with so much to explore! there's so many good dynamics between characters and different elements! from humor, cutesy, fluttering and mysterious! →
➵ @winterchimez m.list ( @midnightfantasiez ) personal rec ➤ Make or Brake ↳ love changmin childhood friends to lovers! he fits it so well for some reason. really feel good fic! → other: criminal,
➵ @zzoguri m.list personal rec ➤ of linked arms and bruised hearts (you are the reason i keep on going) ↳ a long one, but the ending is so satisfying. every moment feels well-earned! again, changmin fits f2l so bad! I love their friend group, and jacob lowkey broke me lol →
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emberfrostlovesloki · 8 months ago
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Criminal Minds ABCs...
Hi all! I hope you are having a good week so far. I made a Criminal Minds ABCs for fun. All of the ABCs deal with characters or concepts from the show. This took a long time to make and I'm very proud of it, so I hope you enjoy it! See all of the ABCs under the cut and all photo credits are at the end! Please be kind to yourself today and I am sending you a hug. All likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated - Love Levi <3
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A stand for Aaron Hotchner: Unit chief of the BAU.
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B is for the BAU a department of the FBI the researches cases on serial killers.
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C is for Criminology: The scientific study of crimes and criminals.
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D is for Derek Morgan: Former Chigaco cop and friend to Penelope Garcia and Spencer Reid.
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E is for Evidence: The available body of facts indicating whether a belief is true or valid.
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F is for Fingerprint: An impression made on a surface by a person's fingertip.
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G if for Penelope Garcia: Spunky Technical Analyst of the BAU.
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H is for Homicide: The killing of one person by another.
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I is for Interrogation: The action of interrogation or the process of being interrogated.
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J is for Jennifer Jareau: The Media Liason for the BAU.
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K is for Kill shot: To shoot a gun with the purpose of killing someone.
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L is for LDSK: The FBI's acronym for Long Distance Serial Killer.
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M stands for Murder: The unlawful premeditated killing of one human being by another.
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N stands for New Agent Training: The Basic Field Training Course is designed to train new special agents and intelligence analysts together to prepare them for the field.
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O stands for Organized: Arranged in a systematic way.
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P Stands for Prior Record: An individual's previous criminal record.
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Q stands for Question: A sentence worded or expressed so as to elicit information.
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R stands for Revenge: The act of inflicting hurt or harm on someone for an unjury or wrong suffered at their hands.
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S stands for Spencer Reid: Eidetic genius and youngest member of the BAU.
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T stands for Trophy: A souvenir or memento of a crime.
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U stands for Unsub: The FBI's slang for Unknown Subject.
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V stands for Victimology: The study of the victims of crime and the psychological effects on them of their experience.
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W stands for Witness: A person who sees an event, typically a crime or accident, take place.
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X stands for eXamination: A detailed inspection or investiation.
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Y stands for Yellow Journalism: A style of newspaper reporting that emphasizes sensationalism over facts.
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Z stands for ZZZ's on the jet home
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Text Break Banner by @cafekitsune
Tag list: @geminitapestry @silk-spun @alicewonderao3 @ssahotchnerr @cumulo-stratus @criminalskies
Want to be added to my tag list? Please check out this post (linked) 
Want to send in a request? Please check out this post, CM Request Post (linked)
Photo Credits:
A @hotchs-big-hands B @bau-bitch02 C @elysianmuses D @pennyspearl E @sewertrashmax F @dienette-666 G @pinkiebieberpie H @baekkku I @magicbecameouragenda J @tokyocyborg K @animefan-2013 L @its-where-the-wild-things-are M @roting N @moodboardmix O @study-sphere P @finalchokehold Q @aurorasoleil R @bebs-art-gallery S @tokyocyborg T @wheresmyfuckintea U @lieutenant-bixbyV @thesorceresstemple W @shegetsburned X @cloverdaisies Y @dumblr Z @notoneofyouhere
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hyungseos-cafe · 1 year ago
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Pairing: TBZ x GN!Reader
Genre: Time Travel AU, Fluff, Angst
Warnings: Mentions of death, bullying/teasing, slight mentions of intoxication and occasional use of profanity.
Word Count: 18.6k+
Update Schedule: Every Monday and Wednesday
Summary: Time travelers, do they actually exist or are they only in bedtime stories? The letterbox series follows the life of a time traveler who writes of the 11 men they encounter overtime. In their best selling novel, they detail the story of how they discovered their grandfather's time machine and later goes into detail of the letters they leave before shifting into the next time continuum, but what happens when the 11 men go searching for them? Do their timelines convene? Do they ever meet again? 
A/n: So three things! One, I forgot to mention that this is a re-write from my old blog. Two, I forgot how many chapters there were. Three, if you want to be added to the tag list either comment on this post or send me an ask!!
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Chapters:
0 - The beginning
1 - The works
2 - Crash Course - Space Time Continuum
3 - Protective
4 - Music Boy
5 - The Baker
6 - Arch Nemesis
7 - The Gardener
8 - First Heartbreak
9 - Hiatus
10 - Study Break
11 - The Gossiper
12 - Anatomy Class
13 - The Co-worker
14 - Track Buddy
15 - Best Friend
16 .1 - The discovery: The letters 1.0
16.2 - The discovery: The letters 2.0
17 - Fin
Taglist: @deoboyznet @winterchimez @mars101 @cloverdaisies @uwu0clock
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from-izzy · 10 months ago
Note
Describe your mutuals with one emoji.
it is currently 'supposed-to-be-watching-lectures' time but! i need to step back a bit 😭
@astrae4 - 🍰
@cupidjyu - 🎀
@cloverdaisies - 🤍
@justalildumpling - 🎧
@littleroaes - 🌆
@sanaxo-o - 👹
@snowflakewhispers - 🎁
@sohnric - 💕
@strayed-quokka - 🔊
@winterchimez - 📑
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deoboyznet · 11 months ago
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2023 HOLIDAY EXCHANGE event recap
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note from admin duckie: so proud and excited to present this past season's exchange fics!! our participating members worked super hard on these, so make sure you show them the love they deserve and to reblog as always <3
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affogato tell yuu smth ☆ lee juyeon
— from: @astrae4, to: @/invuwrld
plot twist ☆ kim sunwoo
— from: @sohnric, to: @/kimsohn
here's much to do with hate, but more with love ☆ lee sangyeon, lee hyunjae
— from: @zzoguri, to: @/daisyvisions
this christmas ☆ jacob bae
— from: @deobienthusiast, to: @/snowflakewhispers
be the one ☆ eric sohn
— from: @sanaxo-o, to: @/deobienthusiast
waiting for our storms to pass ☆ kim sunwoo
— from: @snowflakewhispers, to: @/from-izzy
a new beginning with you ☆ lee juyeon
— from: @winterchimez, to: @/cloverdaisies
the warmest winter ☆ choi chanhee
— from: @from-izzy, to: @/astrae4
unspoken words ☆ lee sangyeon, lee hyunjae
— from: @daisyvisions, to: @/winterchimez
even if the world caves in ☆ choi chanhee
— from: @kimsohn, to: @/sanaxo-o
how to survive senior year ☆ eric sohn
— from: @cloverdaisies, to: @/sohnric
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cloverdaisies · 1 year ago
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hi.. please could you do a juyeon angst with the song nearly witches by panic at the disco i love your writing by the way, thanks
sending all my love ;)
🧸 - anon
NEARLY WITCHES ☆ L.JY
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a lee juyeon angst ! only read if you would like to shed a tear or two ! f! reader !
# GHJH 🧸 anon you little gem, thank you so much! i love this song a lot as well i couldn’t believe my fkn eyes when i saw the request ! how do you know i liked p!atd ?? WHO ARE U ?? YOU ACC KNOW ME but sorry for the long wait! here it is <3 THE SENDING ALL MY LOVE?? MY SIGN OFF?! reveal yourself at once ?? who are you >:(
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Ever since you’d met, he’d only shoot up with your perfume, it was the only thing that made him feel as good as you do. The sweet scent of vanilla, pine, sandal wood surfaced every sweet memory. The exact way the little things in life would bring the biggest smile to your face, holding hands walking through a local park lit up in a pinky-tangerine blend from the sunset. Watching as you giggled when a small butterfly landed on the tip of your little nose lightly blowing it off with loving laughter. Or how you'd huff and puff in little fits of cute frustration when things didn't go your way, because there sure was one thing, you never admitted when you were wrong.
After what seemed like heaven, a relationship gifted to you by god's most important angels, things soon turned into glamorous hell. You two fought over trivial things like money, who is cheating on who, where the fuck had he put your car keys. Arguments soon outweighed the bliss, going to sleep on separate sides of the bed and failing to whisper goodnight to each other. The little actions, that made you leave him, forever.
A small envelope had been shoved through the metal slot of what used to be both Juyeon’s and yours home, but now it was just him the entire place was desolate. Like Jay Gatsby, the grand walls of his home were built entirely for you, his Daisy. Without you, between the polished spruce walls of your victorian style home, it was completely empty, eeringly quiet. He never let a spot of dust touch your paintings, inspecting them everyday knowing how hard you’d worked on him. The hole in his heart couldn’t bare to remove them, it was the only thing you’d left, along with a small bottle of your perfume which he sprayed when he felt he was the most lonely. The pain he felt without you, was unbearable, everyday he perfected his appearance hoping one day you’d show up at the door and return to his arms - but after 5 years, he decided there was no hope.
Juyeon reached to pick up the letter, immediately recognizing the handwriting on the front and scrambling to tear the envelope.
DEAR JUYEON LEE
you have been cordially invited to a night service to celebrate the wedding of:
(your name) & partner
at: oak tree hall, west avenue
date/time: Wednesday 17th January, 7:00pm
RSVP: 000-000-000
Immediately, he felt his heart shatter like fine glass, falling to his knees, with tears threatening to spill from his familiar cat-like brown eyes. Crumpling the page into a tight ball before booting it across the halls, landing with a light thump on the preserved wooden flooring.
You’d found someone knew, even worse, you’d been planning to marry someone that wasn’t him. He’d tried to do the same, but every woman that lied in his satin sheets were gone the next day because they could never compare to what you were, an angel sent especially for him - you were perfection in its finest form, everything he ever wanted and he still couldn’t give in after all these years. He only had one regret, and that was you. The love he felt for you, he would never feel again.
For days, Juyeon moped in your memories, finding a small scrapbook of yours that he’d kept neat ever since you’d left. With messy black hair laid between the pillows of the bed that once belonged to both of you, he flicked every page of photos that captured your happiest memories. With a bitter sigh, he reached to his night stand to grab that small bottle of perfume you’d left, which he used so sparingly to prolong its life. However, as he held the bottle up in front of his face and whined to himself when he saw that there was no more than a small drop left in the bottom of the glass container.
4:00pm, the miniature grandfather clock on his bedside chimed, it was Wednesday 17th January, while Juyeon refused to accept the invite you’d sent him, thinking it was above unordinary that you’d dare invite your ex to a wedding with your new partner, he was still in cahoots with his conscience on showing up.
He’d waited years to see you, despite the setting, it was his only chance to see you after all this time and perhaps maybe there was just one chance he could win you back, however he knew that was impossible, this was you showing him that you’d moved on, this was your spiteful move after all this time, the pain he caused you, you were giving back after years and yes it hurt him - like a shit load of bricks collapsing on him all at once, that was your intention, despite the fact you didn’t know that all he wanted was you, he waited all this time.
Juyeon couldn’t pass up on the chance to see you, for the first time in 5 years, probably the last time he’d see you in many to come. So he rose from the cream satin sheets of his grand bed and waltzed to the bathroom with a glint of ambition in his once dull eyes.
Showering, shaving the stubble he’d grown after days of not looking after himself so much since he knew you wouldn’t be visiting anytime soon. He neatly organized every strand of his hair to perfection before sighing and observing himself in mirror. A gorgeous man, he was, however over the years he was seeing that less and less, feeling more lonely and unwanted everyday which made him lose any sense of esteem he had left.
Juyeon had collected a huge wardrobe of clothes for himself, filled with neat shirts which the maid had ironed every day by his request, along with dresses for you which he’d bought in your size to surprise you with when you returned. Browsing each suit he owned, navy, maroon, pin stripe, grey, he eventually settled on a neat black suit he’d bought in case he ever had to attend something like a wedding - never guessing it would be yours. It had double rows of buttons and was paired with a long sleek black tie, the color complimented his every feature.
And by the time, he’d decided with himself it was around 6:20pm, he went to collect the chauffeur from his quarters and was met with a high look of confusion from the man when Juyeon had mentioned he needed to attend a wedding.
“Who’s wedding are you attending sir?” The chauffeur noisily asked from the front seat of the car, the sound of rain pattering on the metal roof drowning out his gruff voice.
“It will be (your name) and her new fella of sorts.” Juyeon attempted to separate his emotions from his speech, using a calm tone in order to avoid spitting the words from his lips.
“I’m so sorry sir, I thought one day she would return to you, not dare meet somebody new.” He replied with a saddened tone in his voice, attempting not to sound like he was sucking up to his employer in any way.
“Yeah, well I guess it’s life, people move on.” Juyeon grumbled closing off the conversation as they arrived outside Oak Tree Hall, the place you’d always decided you would be getting married. An old but grand building decorated in marble, surrounded by foliage and every kind of flower the earth has to gift.
Exiting the car and telling the chauffeur to come back at a certain time, Juyeon took a sharp breath of hesitance before taking another step towards the building. Guests spilling into the building from the ceremony which he wasn’t invited to, the chaos of jazz music sounding from every window that had been pushed out ever so slightly.
The bar was a disaster, with men and women queued chaotically trying to purchase an ounce of liquor. The dancefloor already full with people jovially swinging to the tunes in the background. To Juyeon, it was a huge mess and could never imagine this is what his own wedding would be like, he knew deep down that you probably thought that too. You were a character of elegance and class not whatever this disaster in front of him was.
He looked around for you, scanning the crowd with hopeful eyes until he saw the beautiful satin white gown fit for the most gorgeous bride trailing across the ground. You too were looking around over the crowd, as if you were trying to spot someone, he noticed how gorgeous your every feature still was, unchanged, his heart felt as if it was putting itself back together until he met your gaze. Your eyes landed on him, you couldn’t believe he was there, how badly you wanted him there, yet you thought he wouldn’t show. He looked the same, unchanged, he was gorgeous, his every feature still perfect. You wished you could run to him, you wished you could escape what you’d fallen into but you were frozen in time.
“My parents are over there darling, shall we go see them?” Your newly wed, pulled at your arm it wasn’t a question it was a demand and you were ripped from the gaze of your past lover.
Juyeon sighed to himself, however this seemed to bring him some clarity, you had moved on, now he can too, there was no way he would be getting you back and that was how he saw the close of your relationship together.
He sat down at one of the tables, where his allocated seat seemed to be, retrieving a glass of red from one of the servers waltzing the room.
He watched you greet each table, anticipating your arrival at his own, eventually you would be walking over slightly not managing in the little heels you’d worn. You smiled politely at him when you caught his eyes, he smiled back with no concern as the groom looked him up and down with slight jealousy in his eyes.
“Who’s this?”Your new partner asked, pointing towards Juyeon with a stern voice, noticeably irritated by his well kept demeanor and good looking features.
“This is Juyeon, an old school friend of mine!” You lied, Juyeon didn’t react physically but was confused with the false introduction, yet he went along with it nodding to your words.
“Congratulations.” Juyeon smiled, shaking his hand firmly, seemingly shutting the mouth of your partner with a polite yet passively aggressive interaction.
“Thank you.” Your partner smiled, looking behind him slightly to roll his eyes before snapping back to the conversation.
“Mày I have this dance?” Juyeon asked bravely as the song changed to a slower ballroom song, looking at your new husband for approval before he nodded and Juyeon took your hand.
His hand cupping yours, set sparks flying through your every vessel and his too, the shear feeling of his warm skin refreshed every memory. His scent was masculine, the same aftershave he’d always used overwhelming your every sense. You’d also always worn the same perfume, Juyeon being able to take in the scent as he closed into your neck, clasping one of your hands with his and placing another hand on your waist.
“Hello there, liar.” Juyeon spoke first, causing you to chuckle slightly as he’d always maintained the same humor over the years.
“I had to lie, if he knew I invited my ex he’d kill me.” You replied, with a sad laugh looking up at his concerned expression.
“He doesn’t need sorting out does he? He’s not hurting my sweetness is he?” He asked snidely, almost hissing out the words, the terms of endearment flipping your guts upside down in excitement.
“N-no, nothing like that he’s just a bit of a control freak. I love him though, it’s tolerable.” You replied, squeezing his shoulder in reassurance, unable to look at him as you think you may pass out if you did, due to his beautiful face and nature.
"That's not something you want to be saying about someone you've just married." He laughed, sending joy to your heart with the shear sound of voice.
"I guess not, is it?" You replied sarcastically, still not being able to look him in the eyes, as you swayed on the dancefloor.
As the both of you moved across the dancefloor, it was evident the song was coming to a close. It’s been years since you’ve felt the comfort of him, years since you’d felt this way. Finding the strength to look him in the eyes and almost melt into his touch. It was magical, the way he held you, the way he looked at you as if you were the only woman in the world.
"I've waited years for you." Juyeon replied shortly before going to speak again. " So if you change your mind you know where I am. Goodbye my sweetness."
With one last squeeze of your waist he let you go on the last string of the song, stunned for words, you wished you could run after him and kiss him until time ended, but your new husband had already whisked you away. Pulled away from what you didn't know you'd always wanted. You’d made a huge mistake, and as you watched Juyeon leave the room you couldn’t help but feel your heart break. Years were wasted with a man that could never make you feel the way he did, an unforgivable amount of time had passed and it was your fault. You’d put him through so much pain you wished you could take back, but you were trapped, it was too late.
It was too late for you both, hands in his pockets he walked out into the night, maybe one day you’d return, a singular tear fell from his eye. It was time to move on.
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gluion · 1 year ago
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all of moni's loves ! — ally (@/winterchimez) ❄️ — bar (@/sohnric) 📟 — beam (@/sungbeam) 💫 — bliss (@/blissfullsvn) 🪁 — cat (@/wuahae) 🍮 #bestie twinster 4lyfer — cece (@/sanscee) 🦅 — cherry (@/hanfourz) 🌸 — clo (@/cloverdaisies) 🍀 — codi (@/tbzhub) 💘 — cream (@/uriwoos2) 🍪 — dai (@/000-pawz) 🍨 — daisy (@/daisyvisions) ✨ — dal (@/hongyangi) 🍯 — dora (@/littleroaes) 🥀 — dre (@/indisite) ❤️ — eve (@/wave2eve) 🩰 — faith (@/faithst) 🎀 — fawn (@/juyeonszn) ☕ — fleur (@/sunfleursgarden) 🪷 — holly (@/hollyoongs) 🌠 — ira (@/nicholasluvbot) ⛰️ — isa (@/ofyourwarmth) 💋 — isa (@/mins-fins) 🍇 — izzy (@/from-izzy) 🖤 — j (@/justalildumpling) 🍒 — juls (@/serejae) 🌆 — k (@/deobienthusiast) 🌲 — ki (@/hanfourz) 🪼 — kimchi (@/planetkiimchi) 🥬 — kiwi (@/wonbin-truther) 🍵 — lexi (@/heechwe) 🐚 — lynn (@/lynnimini) 🐰 — mae (@/sureogi) 🍓 — mari (@/voikiraz) 👓 — matty (@/stealanity) 🎐 — maya (@/kimsohn) 🎧 — menda (@/lionhanie) 🪸 — mimi (@/guiltysungho) 🍨 — miao (@/miaozzy) 🐱 — mona (@/quaissants) 🪴 — moni (@/taerrrrrae) 🐥 — nana (@/fgumi) 🏴 — nik (@/ddingdongz) 💛 — nina (@/downmainstreet) 🐈‍⬛ — nini (@/taesanrot) 🍦 — noelle (@/icyminghao) 🔮 — ophelia (@/snowflakewhispers) 🌨️ — peony (@/hyungseos-cafe) 🌻 — reese (@/itsbeeble) ☄️ — rhea (@/chrrybbomb) 🧶 — saki (@/seokkiez) 🍎 — sana (@/sanaxo-o) 🥞 — shawna (@/wavesmp3) 🍃 — soph (@/loserlvrss) 🫐 — sophie (@/bonedors) 🗝️ — star (@/camstqr) 📷 — sun (@/1ntaks) ☀️ — theadora (@/kissohee) 🌷 — uriel (@/slimeclimbtime) 🗡️ — ursa (@/thepixelelf) 🐻 — vae (@/hcuyk) 🍂 — vienna (@/koishua) 🎱 — vivi (@/bananielle) 🌺 — xixi (@/0310s) 🫧 — yssa (@/chewnotchoke) 🧊 — yumi (@/cupidjyu) 💘 — zanna (@/slytherinshua) 🍰 — zyn (@/zynz0) 🏳️
-> if you ever want your emoji changed, let me know!
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the networks ! @onedoornet @deoboyznet @kflixnet @blankjournal @k-labels @zumblrnet @kstrucknet
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the tag lists ! — permanent tag lists will not be mentioned for nsfw works
tbz permanent tag list: @winterchimez @miusgirl @jenoscafe @sweet-unicorn-world @mosviqu @vernyangel @stealanity @deobi0412 @blue-rainydays @maessseongs
zb1 permanent tag list: @deinsleeps @sofix-hc7
svt permanent tag list: @mark-geolli
boynextdoor permanent tag list: @bonedors @0310s @whyilovewhales-pdf @voikiraz
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juyeonszn · 1 year ago
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EXCITEMENT
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PAIRING ji changmin x f!reader
WORD COUNT 6.22k
GENRES smut ﹒angst ﹒fluff
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, best friends to lovers, numerous mentions of the female orgasm, ji changmin is a bit of a manwhore, mentions of alcohol, insane tension my b, intense making out x2, oral (m! and f! receiving), multiple orgasms, couch sex but missionary, unprotected sex (wrap before u fucking tap -_-), creampie, changmin is lowkey very whipped and very pussy drunk in this, also forewarning for every fic in this collab— there is lots of foreshadowing and references to the other fics since they all fall within the same timeline/universe!
SUMMARY you know, when you told your girl friends that you’d never finished before, you were expecting it to blow over like no big deal. what you weren’t expecting was for it to spiral into a whole other mess.
MORE i hope u jichang lovers are strapped in and ready for this… kinda went crazy with it 😭😭 um anyway?? first fic of the black out or back out collab?? crazy!! this fic actually ruined me. it used up all my brain power so if every other one sucks u can’t blame me!! it’s the law!! also, i’d like to take a moment to wish my boyz a very happy 6th anniversary <3 so so proud of all they’ve accomplished these past 6 years and i can’t wait to see what they do in the next 6. in this deobi shit 4L frfr 🙏🙏
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel
TAGLIST @millksea
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“No fucking way.”
You blink at Soyeon. It wasn’t that hard to believe. In fact, it was pretty easy to believe. You set down the bowl of popcorn on your lap and nod slowly.
“Uh, yeah. Yes fucking way,” a nervous laugh escapes your lips. “I’ve had to fake it with every guy I’ve ever been with. I don’t know what it is. Maybe something’s wrong with me.”
Men were… incompetent at certain things. And apparently your pleasure was one of those. Every dude you’ve ever slept with failed to make you finish. It was at the point that you felt that you were the problem. It would be understandable if it had been a couple guys, but every single one? Your luck had to be complete ass.
The only reason the topic had been brought up was because Soyeon had mentioned something about her last fling during your movie night. She was talking about how that had been the best sex she's ever had and it spurred you into making your confession. The last guy you’d been with had probably been the worst.
“Never?” Jiwon’s jaw drops, elbows resting on her knees. “How are you still alive, girl? How do you get your fix?”
“My hand, my vibrator, my pillow sometimes,” you shrug, picking at a loose thread on your blanket. “I’ve learned to make do with my situation, I guess. If I can’t get it elsewhere, I’ll just do it myself, y’know?”
Your girl friends look at you with pouts on their lips, as if they were the ones experiencing your misfortunes. You hadn’t even expected it to be such a big deal. You’d thought this was a normal, common occurrence. Boys usually sucked at things when it came to girls. But they all took this as a personal hit, like you were a fallen soldier in battle.
Perhaps the female orgasm was far more important than you assumed it to be.
“Considering who your best friend is, you’d think you were getting good dick left and right,” Dahyun snorts into her glass of wine. “This is actually kinda insane.”
You guess she had a point, despite you both leading very different lives. Changmin, your best friend, was known as one of the many heartthrobs on campus. He was in a fraternity, played on the school’s baseball team, and he even played with other things. Namely the hearts of practically every other girl at your university.
You’d think it would bother you to be so close to a man who couldn’t give less of a fuck about those of the same sex as you. But for some reason, you couldn’t find it in you to care. It’s not like he was bragging about the bitches he bagged on a regular basis. Though you were his best friend, he understood boundaries. He knew what was appropriate to talk about with you and respected that.
Your friends laugh at her observation, but drop the conversation after that, resuming the movie you were watching. However, it’s not that easy for you.
You can’t stop wondering if something really *is wrong with you. Why was it that everyone and their mom was capable of finishing and you weren’t? It was more unlikely that every single man you’ve been with sexually was that mediocre. Were you really that unlucky?
It bothers you so much that you find yourself still thinking about it well into the following week.
With the start of the new semester, came the adjustment of new classes. Even though you were a Communications major, you made the grave mistake of taking Lifespan Growth and Development with Changmin for the extra credit. He was an Early Childhood Education major, so it was a requirement for him, but not for you. (Honestly, he only forced you to take it with him so you had at least one lecture together. He was afraid your friendship might start to fade if you didn’t see each other often.)
Imagine how horrified you felt when your professor began to talk about babies and their circadian rhythm, but the only thing in your head was the fact that you’d never orgasmed because of a man. You felt like you were going crazy at this point. Really, the thought should’ve been long forgotten by now. But you couldn’t help yourself from dwelling on it, especially after your friends made jokes at your expense.
As you’re walking out of the lecture hall side by side with Changmin, you keep your focus on the ground, your hearing going in and out. His voice is staticy, your brain only registering words here and there. You’re a little pissed off that this has become such an issue.
He notices your lack of response and stops walking, eyebrows furrowed. You pause in your tracks along with him. “Are you good? You’ve been spacing out all morning.”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you shake your head as if that would rid of these stupid thoughts. “I’m just a little tired, I guess. I haven’t been getting much sleep.”
“Well, you better fix that. We’re expecting this weekend’s party to be one of the bigger ones this semester. Juyeon’s passing those fliers around like it’s his job,” Changmin purses his lips with a snort, ruffling your hair. “I need my beer pong partner to be in tip-top shape.”
You scratch the back of your neck. Half of you was kind of hesitant to go to this weekend’s TBZ party considering that was where you met the dude who started this whole downward spiral. He made an offhand comment about seeing you again, but you were actually hoping that would never happen. And with your fortune, the probability of running into him was pretty high.
“You see…“ You begin, but Changmin interrupts you with a distressed groan before you can continue.
“Don’t tell me you’re thinking of flaking,” his arms fall to his sides as his head tips back dramatically. “Y/N, I really need you there. How else am I gonna smoke everyone? I need— I mean we need to keep our title.”
Sometimes you wish Ji Changmin took anything else as seriously as he takes beer pong. You suppose it came with being a fraternity brother or something. They all drank alcohol like it was fucking water. You’re still sort of surprised none of them (Sunwoo) has gotten alcohol poisoning yet.
“I’m just… trying to avoid someone. And they’ll probably be there.” You sigh, fiddling with your fingers. Your best friend gives you an unreadable look that flashes across his face only for a moment.
“Tell me who it is. I’ll make sure they’re not allowed in. I’d much rather have you there than some rando who’s bugging you.” He says, shoving his hands into the pockets of his cargo pants.
“That’s really unne—“
“Yo, Changmin! Aren’t you going with us to Cobie’s?”
You both turn towards the sudden intrusion, the voice belonging to Eric Sohn. He’s around 50 feet away from where you’re standing, joined by Kim Sunwoo and Ju Haknyeon. Changmin yells out his answer and spins back to you, an apologetic smile on his face. Somehow, you’re a little grateful for the interruption.
“We’ll finish this later, okay?” He nods at you, heading backwards in their direction. “You’re going, Y/N.”
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You really should’ve listened to your instincts when they told you to skip out on the party.
You’re well aware that every attendee was crucial for the TBZ boys and their stupid rivalry with the KAT girls. So maybe you understood why Changmin needed you there so badly, aside from the obvious beer pong thing. However, you were starting to regret showing up.
First of all, Ji Changmin was nowhere to be found. Second of all, Jeon Soyeon was hounding you all night about the secret you so idiotically shared with your gal pals.
She was dead set on finding you a solution. (Basically, she was scanning the crowd of partygoers for a suitable man to satisfy your overdue needs. And she was proving devastatingly unsuccessful.)
You were too anxious to drink, also. Your feet were bouncing from where you sat on the couch, and your fingers couldn’t stop fidgeting. The antsiness was getting annoying at this point and you were hoping your knight in shining armor (Ji Changmin) revealed himself soon. Lest he wanted to lose out on his beloved beer pong partner.
It appears that your years of honing in on your manifestation powers have finally come to fruition when you spot Younghoon and Juyeon hauling the beer pong table into the living room. Where one of those tables are stationed, you know you’re guaranteed to find your best friend. The shorter of the two gentle giants cups his hands around his mouth and announces the first round of tonight’s tournament.
You stand from your seat, grabbing the opportunity to break free of Soyeon’s efforts to pimp you out. You’re ready to confirm you and Changmin’s spot in the tournament, when you see that you’ve already been beaten to it. It takes absolutely everything in you not to let your jaw drop and your eyes to tear up.
Some girl who happens to be in your Lifespan Growth and Dev class (you think her name is Iseul) is draped over Changmin’s arm, signing them up for the first round. He doesn’t look like he wants to, but makes no effort to refuse her.
You don’t know why it irks you. It shouldn’t irk you.
You’ve never cared about who he spends his free time with in the past. It’s been so easy for you to let his behavior slide, brushing it under the rug like it was no biggie. But this time, you care a whole lot. You chalk it up to the fact that he was seemingly replacing you as his beer pong partner, even though that was the entire reason why he wanted you to come to the party.
Yeah. That’s why.
Your tongue darts out to wet your lips just as Hyunjae passes by, no doubtedly heading to the beer pong table. You catch the sleeve of his polo and force him to halt in his steps. You’re not even sure why the hell he’s wearing a polo in the first place, his outfit embodying the stereotypical frat boy perfectly. This looked nothing like his usual wardrobe.
“Oh, hey Y/N, what’s up?” He smiles that award-winning Hyunjae smile, the one that manages to charm every girl in the room every single time he pulls it out. He brings the brim of his red solo cup up to his lips and finishes whatever’s left in it with one swig. Maybe this was a bad idea.
“Do you wanna be my beer pong partner?” Okay, well now you’ve said it so there’s no going back.
His eyebrow shoots up in a mixture of shock and pleasant surprise. “Me? You’re not gonna ask Changmin?”
“He’s…” Your eyes flitter over to where he stands with Iseul(?), Hyunjae’s following. No. You’re okay. This isn’t getting to your head at all. Everything’s cool and peachy. “He’s too preoccupied.”
Hyunjae chooses not to say anything, instead nudging you over to the opposite end of the table. Changmin’s eyes widen when he sees the two of you, even having the audacity to look scandalized. God, maybe that was his biggest fault. He was so entitled.
So, it was just fine for him to bail on you in favor of some girl he didn’t even know, but the second you talk to one of his frat brothers, it’s off the table? What a fucking hypocrite. The whole ordeal was actually beginning to get on your nerves now. All you wanted to do was win this stupid beer pong game to show him that he’ll never find a partner as good as you.
Woah. Holy shit, Y/N. You need to dial it back a bit with the possessiveness. That was a lot, especially for you.
Juyeon narrows his eyes at you and then glances over to Changmin, the cogs turning in his head slowly. You’re not sure if that’s because he’s so used to seeing you both on the same side of the beer pong table, or because his vision was so shitty. Either way, it has you cowering behind Hyunjae a little as he dips the ping pong ball into the cup of water in the center.
“Okay, you know the rules. Let’s have a healthy, friendly game,” Younghoon says, tapping the table with a smile. “No playing dirty. I’m looking at you, Hyunjae.”
The brunette raises his hands in surrender, doing a quick bout of rock, paper, scissors with Changmin to determine which team went first. He wins with a quirk of his lips, sauntering back over to you. After rolling his neck around and popping his fingers, he tosses the ball right into Changmin and Iseul’s center cup.
You hate to admit it, but Hyunjae’s actually pretty good at this. You’ve never really paid attention to anyone else’s beer pong skills considering you’ve only ever played with Changmin as your partner. Who knows, maybe you’ll switch over permanently after this. At least, you might if he keeps up whatever it is that he’s doing.
Your best friend’s jaw tightens as he grabs the red solo cup, chugging what’s inside. He huffs and takes his turn, nearly missing with the way the ball circles around the rim. He sighs in relief at the same time you grimace. You still hadn’t had anything to drink all night and starting with fucking beer was probably the worst idea.
The game probably would’ve been a bit more competitive had Iseul been decent at beer pong, but she sucked. So Hyunjae and yourself always kept your lead by one cup or more. Karma is a dish best served cold, or however the saying goes. And karma certainly presented itself in the form of Ji Changmin’s first ever TBZ beer pong tournament loss.
Hyunjae high fives you with a cheesy grin, lacing your fingers together and shaking them around. He presses a kiss to your temple and guides you away from the table as Juyeon and Younghoon clear it for the second round. It wasn’t odd for any of the TBZ boys to show you affection since you were like a sister to most of them, but this felt… kind of weird. You can’t pinpoint exactly why, but it made you feel off.
“You’re my secret weapon,” he laughs, hands burying into the pockets of his khaki shorts. “I’m gonna steal you as my partner permanently.”
As much as you joked around in your head, the truth of the matter was that you could never actually replace Changmin. In spite of him acting like a complete dumbass tonight, he was still your best friend. Not even the biggest of fights would change that fact.
Before you can dismiss him, Changmin is stalking over to you with a slight scowl. His nostrils flare a bit as he asks, “Can we talk?”
You barely nod and then he’s fisting the material of your top at the small of your back, urging you away from the living room. Your feet keep tripping over themselves while you attempt to match his pace but he’s too determined to reach his destination in mind to even notice. No one even bats an eye as you get ushered to your demise.
You’re coaxed into a nearby bathroom without a word, your best friend standing in front of you with his arms crossed over his chest. Because you hadn’t seen him a majority of the night, you hadn’t gotten the chance to get a good look at him. He was wearing a long sleeve striped polo and some baggy jeans, which probably would look basic on anyone else. But this is Ji Changmin. Girls flocked after him for a reason.
“Why would you play with Hyunjae? You know the type of guy he is. Now he thinks he has a shot with you or something.” As soon as he opens his mouth, you remember the type of guy he is.
“What does it matter to you? You were too busy giggling with your flavor of the week. Of course I wasn’t gonna wait around for you.” You bite back, mirroring his stance.
“Flavor of the—?” His eyebrows scrunch together in confusion and then everything settles in. “Oh.”
“Yeah,” you laugh humorlessly. “Don’t act all hypocritical with me, Changmin. I can’t believe I even came to this fucking party for you when you didn’t even bother giving me the same energy. Best friend, my ass.”
A scoff brushes past your lips and you turn to exit the bathroom, but he grabs your wrist. His grip isn’t too harsh, but it’s tight enough to stop you from going anywhere. “Wait. Don’t leave.”
“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t.” Your eyes flick back and forth between his and the fingers wrapped around your forearm. And you know, you really should’ve predicted what would happen after that. The nature of your words were provocative in their own right, not to mention the tension brewing in the midst of your argument.
From one second to the next, Changmin’s mouth is on your own, your back pressed to the bathroom door. His hands are everywhere and nowhere all at once; digging into your sides, running through your hair, caressing your face. You feel insane. Your head feels empty, no coherent thoughts running through it as his lips move against yours.
They migrate along your jaw and down your neck, nipping and sucking wherever they feel fit. Everything is moving way too fast for you to comprehend what’s happening. His lips feel so good on your skin, you’re having trouble finding the strength in you to stop him. But you know you have to. This was your best friend, for god’s sake. And besides, you didn’t want to deal with the disappointment you’ve faced time and time again when it came to men. You couldn’t handle feeling that way toward him.
Your palm presses against his chest and you try your hardest to ignore the sensation of his heart thumping beneath it. Your eyes squeeze shut as you push him off of you gently. Not expecting the sudden disruption, he stumbles backwards slightly. He’s a little dazed, like he, too, has not a single thought in that brain of his.
“I can’t— we can’t—“ You’re breathless, heaving up and down as if you’d just ran a damn marathon. “I have to go.”
You don’t give Changmin any freedom to react, escaping the bathroom exasperated. There’s too much going through your mind to search for Soyeon, leaving the party as quickly as you can. The moment your foot steps out of the front door, it’s like you’re given some clarity. The fresh air feels cool on your warm skin while you take the walk back to your apartment, not in the mood to sit in a stuffy car with anyone else. You needed to think clearly and vulnerably, and someone being there would just hinder that.
But first, you had to figure out where to go from here.
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It’s been a couple days since the last TBZ party and you were still avoiding Ji Changmin like he was the plague.
You were definitely wishful thinking when you decided to just ignore things until you had class together. And even then, you were planning on pretending like nothing even happened. Fucking up your friendship with him was something you couldn’t stand emotionally. Or physically. It would be akin to the pain of having your heart ripped straight from your chest.
Meeting Changmin when you did was almost like a blessing in disguise. His attitude about life was exactly what you needed coming into university. You were shy and scared of your new surroundings. You had no friends, you were far from your family, and your imposter syndrome was through the roof. But then he swooped in and made everything better somehow. As much as it was a snooze fest, you’ll eternally be a little bit grateful for sharing that First Year Seminar class with him.
Deep down, a piece of you has always belonged to Changmin. From that first day of freshman year to now, you’ve always held him to a different standard than everyone else. You liked to believe it was because he was your best friend, the one person who sought you out even when it felt like no one ever would. And until very recently, you kept trying to convince yourself that was the case.
If you slept together that might be worse. What if he ended up like every other guy you’ve landed in bed with? What if he couldn’t satisfy you? It would make it even more strained. You didn’t want to end up like every other girl who’s vied for his heart and failed miserably. He wasn’t a relationship person.
Falling for him alone would complicate everything. If he didn’t feel the same, it would be weird between you and your friendship would never go back to normal. Yet as you lay here, body bundled in your comforter and drowning in one of the many sweatshirts he’s left over at your apartment, scrolling through his feed, you realize that there’s no return from this point. Now that you’ve contemplated the idea, you’re too far in.
You know, the universe had funny ways of rewarding you. (Or rather, punishing you.)
There’s a knock at your front door. You’re not entirely sure who it could be since you weren’t expecting anyone, but one glance through the peephole and it’s all over for you. You consider stepping away, running and cowering in your bedroom until he disappears so you can go back to dissimulating that your entire life wasn’t crumbling to your feet.
“Y/N, I know you’re in there. Open up, please, we need to talk.”
You curse under your breath but unlock the door anyway, maneuvering so he can come inside with ease. Changmin stares at you with an unreadable expression for a minute, vision raking over your figure. Maybe you’re imagining it, but it’s something similar to how men have looked at you before, like they were undressing you with their eyes. That’s when you remember that you were wearing his sweatshirt.
Without pants underneath…
The wind knocks out of him in an instant, something primal coming over him when his gaze lands on you in his clothing. He knows he shouldn’t think about you the way he does. He shouldn’t think of how pretty you are when your pen is caught in your teeth, attempting to make sense of whatever your professor was talking about. He shouldn’t think of the way your cheeks flush when you’ve had too much alcohol at one of the TBZ parties. He shouldn’t think of kissing you, or pressing up against you like a dog in heat. He shouldn’t be thinking of the kiss you shared Friday night.
You’re his best friend, the one person in the world who has ever understood him. The one who’s always glued to his side even when he may be in the wrong. Why would he ever want something different? How could he ask for more when he should be thankful for what he was already given?
“Why are you pushing me away? Why are you ignoring me?” Is what he finally asks after the silence has become unbearable.
“Changmin,” you swallow thickly, hesitative with what you say next. “Friends don’t kiss— we don’t kiss.”
He takes a step forward, and then another, and then another until he’s only arms’ length from you. “But, we could.”
You release a shuddery breath, reaching out to stop him from coming any closer. “P-Please. We can’t do this— I can’t do this.”
“Why not?” He pushes. He knows he’s tiptoeing the edge of something else. There’s a fine line between what you have now, and what he’s wanted for so long. It’s always been a matter of if you wanted that too. “Is it because you just don’t want to?”
You’re not even sure how to respond to him. Of course you want this. It isn’t that you don’t want him. You’re more scared than anything. You’re scared of becoming just another victim of Ji Changmin’s charms, of giving into him and it leading to another let down. Your resistance is evident on your face, and you’re not all that taken aback when he sighs.
“I’ve wanted you since that first day of First Year Seminar, Y/N. No one has ever compared to you and no one ever will,” he confesses, a hand coming up to cup your cheek. “I sleep with random girls to get you off my mind, to forget that I’m pretty fucking in love with my best friend.”
Then it all clicks.
It’s like you’ve come to the biggest realization of your life, an epiphany striking you suddenly with the weight of a freight train. It all trickles into place, the reason why you’ve never enjoyed yourself during sex. The reason why you’ve never finished at the hands of any man you’ve been with intimately.
None of them were Ji Changmin. None of them were the best friend that your heart has belonged to since your freshman year.
You press your lips to his without any warning, nearly colliding into him with the force of your impatience. He reciprocates immediately, fingers tangling in your hair and holding you closer than physically possible. You tilt your head to deepen the kiss, tongue dragging along his lower lip. Years of repressed longing and pining find themselves surfacing in this one kiss.
Changmin’s hands travel to your waist, burrowing into the fabric of his sweatshirt as he yanks you toward the couch. He falls to a sitting position when the backs of his knees hit the edge, your knees resting on either side of his lap. You don’t break apart once, not even to gasp for air as he grinds you down onto him. Through the material of his cargos you can feel him. He’s just as throbbing as you are, your core pulsing with a need unlike any other.
His fingers reach for the hem of the sweatshirt and that’s when you pause him, your nerves getting the best of you. He frowns. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s just,” admitting this a second time isn’t easier. “I’ve never— nobody’s ever made me… you know…”
The corners of his lips curl up, thumbs rubbing the backs of your thighs. “You’ve never came before, baby?”
Your breathing stutters in your chest, the smugness of his voice sending shockwaves through your body. You should’ve fully expected him to be a master at pillowtalk, what with the whole Sex-God persona and all that jazz, but it still catches you off guard. You shake your head shyly, arms hooked around his neck. His mouth attaches to the spot behind your ear, sucking the skin tenderly.
“I’ll make sure you’re ruined for anyone else,” his voice is no louder than a whisper, but sounds deafening to the cotton stuffing the place where your brain should be. “I’ll make you feel so good, you won’t think twice about who you belong to.”
A small whine emits from your throat, hips gyrating themselves onto his crotch. He bucks up into you instinctively, keeping you still on his lap. The sheer possessiveness of his tone is driving you up the wall. That seemed to be something you had in common with each other. You’re lightheaded, too many layers of clothing blocking the space between you. Changmin connects your lips again, sliding his hands beneath the sweatshirt so his fingers can hook into the waistband of your panties.
He helps you out of them and your top, baring your entire body to him. The way his cock twitches makes him feel like a goddamn teenager. You paw at the zipper of his pants as he pulls off his t-shirt, tugging the cargos down his legs so you can kneel between them. If he thought he wasn’t going to last before, he’s certain of it now. He wraps your hair around his fist in a makeshift ponytail, watching you with hooded eyes as you kiss his tip.
“You look so gorgeous like this,” his voice is wavering, his composure drifting off.
That encourages you to take him into the wet heat of your mouth, tongue twirling around the tip. You run it along his slit, tasting the precum that had formed there. His head falls back onto the sofa cushions, jerking his hand back a bit and tugging your hair just enough for it to sting. You moan around his dick, the pain providing more pleasure than its intended purpose.
He bucks up into your mouth yet again, his length gliding down your throat. Not prepared for the intrusion, you gag, pulling off of his cock with a string of saliva bridging your lips to the tip. Tears prick at your eyes for a second, and then you’re going back in.
This time you manage to relax your throat, fitting more than you could prior. Changmin’s eyes are half lidded, not once daring to look anywhere that wasn’t you. The sight of you so eager to please, so desperate to reward him in spite of you being the one who’s never orgasmed before, was clouding his thinking.
The image of you on your knees, sucking him off like your life depended on it, would be burned into his brain for the rest of his life. (Not that he minded. You lived there practically rent free, anyways.)
Your attention stays on the tip of his cock, tongue repeatedly alternating with dragging under the head and the slit on top. He could die happily, actually, the fear that he may never have you in this way finally dissipating into thin air. Want could only take a man so far.
He doesn’t stay sentimental for very long, remembering that you were currently between his legs and the inner monologue could wait for later. Though, he makes the grave mistake of making direct eye contact with you and it’s game over after that point.
Changmin finishes with a groan, his cum painting your chest with milky white ropes. He cups both sides of your face, bringing you up to kiss you messily. He doesn’t care that he can taste himself in your mouth, nipping your bottom lip to pry it open. The two of you swap spots, with him now on the floor and you on the couch. He pushes up your knees, spreading them to gain access to your cunt, glistening with your slick.
He presses a soft kiss to your clit, glancing up at you through his lashes to gauge your reaction. He not only had a reputation to defend, but he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was going to be the first man to make you cum. But it wasn’t sufficient to just fuck you, he needed to do more than that. He needed to flood your senses and show you exactly what you’ve been missing out on.
His tongue circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves, his ring and middle fingers going counter-clockwise on your entrance. He can hear the laboring of your breathing, the sharp exhale through your nostrils when he experimentally slides one of them inside of you. He starts to pump it slowly, building up the pace until he adds the other finger, curling them.
You whine when Changmin’s lips envelope your clit, suckling like a man starved. His fingers south don’t halt their assault, the palm of his other hand flattening on your lower stomach. You reach down to card through his hair, clutching the strands for support. He groans against your pussy, the vibrations contributing to the knot growing tighter in your abdomen.
He switches his tongue and fingers a moment later, lapping at your hole and swiping at your clit in a close ovular pattern with his thumb. You’re dizzy, lids fluttering shut and back arching off the cushions in a weak attempt to minimize the space between you. Changmin pins down your hips with his forearm, continuing making out with your cunt.
He flips the stimulation once more, mouth on your clit and fingers buried deep inside of you in an instant. He keeps his eyes on you, focused on every scrunch of your face and slacking of your jaw. The sudden difference in sensations has a loud moan ripping from your vocal cords, that knot coming undone almost too quickly for it being your first time in this position. You feel his lips turn up in a smile, like he’s proud of himself for doing the impossible.
Changmin pulls back slightly, his fingers still working you down from your peak. When he thinks you’ve calmed, he’s up and kissing you, petting your hair gently. “You did so well for me, baby.”
“I’ve made myself cum so many times before, but never like that— holy shit, Changmin…” You’re a little stunned and he finds it cute, despite you both being in such a compromising situation.
“I need you to give me one more, is that okay?” He lays you on your back, hovering over you. “I wanna see your pretty face when you cum on my cock.”
You pull him down for another kiss, pecking the side of his neck with a hum. “Want you to fill me up, too.”
The groan that leaves him is guttural, his forehead falling onto your collarbone. Dreams really do come true. He hikes up one of your legs, lining himself up with you. He guides his cock into you and watches you for any moves of discomfort. A whimper bubbles past as he slips in, bottoming out smoothly. Half of you still couldn’t believe this was happening. No fucking way was Ji Changmin on top of you right now, dick compressed in your cunt to the hilt.
He holds your knee to your chest as he begins to thrust his hips, driving his cock deep from the get go. Each motion jostles you further up the sofa, but you’re too gone to care. Your eyes have started to roll to the back of your head and you already feel that pressure rising in the pit of your stomach.
At this rate, you’re not sure you’ll last very long. You’re still extremely sensitive from your first orgasm and Changmin’s plowing into you like he might never get the chance to do it again.
“You’re so— fuck— you’re so tight, baby… Squeezing me in like you don’t wanna let me go,” he rasps, trailing open mouthed kisses along your jaw and carrying them down your jugular.
You moan something about how deep he is, about how you can feel him everywhere. It’s too much. It’s not enough. And despite him giving you everything he has to offer, you crave more. You’re yearning for more.
Something in you snaps and you’re cradling his face in your hands. “Love you so much, Changmin. Wanna be with you forever.”
His eyes widen at your off-kilter confession, but he doesn’t cease once. If anything, his speed increases as he kisses you passionately, noses bumping but so far on the spectrum from the others. This one is more emotional, more meaningful. It’s not long before he’s spilling into you, moaning against your lips. You follow closely behind, your second orgasm cresting like a tidal wave.
You stay like that for a minute, both of you soaking it all in. Your chests meet in the middle with each breath you take.
Changmin pulls out of you carefully, laying so you can rest comfortably on top of him. A smile inches across his feature, like he was on the inside of a joke you weren’t. You raise an eyebrow at him.
“What…”
“Nothing, it’s just,” he brushes some of your hair from your forehead to leave a smooch there. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you how I felt for a while now. I just wanted to assure that you wouldn’t scream in my face and run the opposite direction. But you went ahead and beat me to it.”
“You meant what you said about the other girls?” You nibble at the skin of your cheek, nervous. “You slept with them to distract yourself from me? Even Iseul?”
He nods, albeit a little shamefully. “Not my proudest moment, I’ll say. I could’ve gone about it a million other ways. But yeah, I didn’t want to ruin what we had. I couldn’t stand the thought of losing you just because I couldn’t get my feelings in check.”
“You’re stupid,” you laugh, cuddling further into him. “It’s a good thing I’m kind of into that.”
“Kind of?” He quirks a brow at you. “I don’t know, you were saying something about loving me so much and wanting to be with me forever earlier…”
You smack his chest playfully. “Shut up. That was a moment of weakness or whatever.”
“It’s okay,” he smiles at you fondly, as if you were the reason that the sun shone so brightly. “I love you, too. And I wouldn’t mind being with you forever.”
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© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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winterchimez · 1 year ago
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🔎 — the 007 files
James Bond—or rather, the public was more aware that his code name, agent 007, has been working behind the scenes for decades now. imagine this: what if the agent 007 that you have come to know of was actually more than just one person? what if the famous group The Boyz were all agent 007 working under M16. buckle up as you access M16's top secret operative files, aka the most famous missions these individual agents have succeeded in.
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A/N: why hello my fellow readers! i present to you a tbz x 007 cross-over collab series!! i've had this idea for a while now and thanks to @sungbeam who gave me the genius idea of hosting an open collab (and co-planning with me) for this!! i'm so so excited and i really hope this doesn't flop lmao 😭 so yes, please feel free to join the fun! 😉
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🔎 STARRING: the boyz x f!reader/oc // g.n!reader/oc
🔎 GENRE: crime, angst, fluff, crack, suggestive, smut (only for 18+ writers!!), assorted pairings (more to be added)
🔎 WARNINGS: will be stated in each respective files!
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RULES & REGULATIONS:
↬ choose a tbz member & a bond film to start off! you may write the story loosely based on the storyline of the film/a certain scene(s) inspired by the film itself! or alternatively, write it based on the themed song for the specific film you have chosen! (eg: sangyeon - the spy who loved me)
↬ slots will be first come first served! in total there will be 11 slots for 11 members
↬ only tbz member x reader / tbz member x oc!! no tbz member x member for this
↬ as mentioned above, writers will have the option to choose to either write a female/gender neutral reader/oc!
↬ minimum wc would be 1k, and there's no maximum so feel free to write as much as you'd like! pls include a "read more" feature after your summaries/genre/warnings/word count/a.n.
↬ you are allowed to write any genre you like! pls make sure you're over 18+ if you wish to include smut in your work.
↬ no sensitive topics will be allowed (eg: su*c*de, r*pe, r*cism, etc.)
↬ i will be making a discord gc for easier access, updates, and even brainstorming with one another! it will also help me loads with any announcements i will be making. joining in would be highly encouraged (though if you choose not to that's totally fine by me, just keep me regularly updated in my dms!)
↬ the project will officially kick start off on December 1st 2023, and you will have till March 31st 2024 to complete your work! if ever you wish to drop out / need a bit more time to publish your work pls do let me know!!
↬ fill out this google form to secure your place in this collab :) (key: shaken not stirred)
↬ lastly, reblog this post, @ me in your fics & use the hashtag 🔎 — the 007 files in your works!!
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FILES:
Lee Sangyeon — The Spy Who Loved Me @winterchimez
Jacob Bae — The World Is Not Enough @snowflakewhispers
Kim Younghoon — Goldfinger @daisyvisions
Lee Hyunjae — Skyfall @kkinou
Lee Juyeon — For Your Eyes Only @juyeonszn
Kevin Moon
Choi Chanhee — No Time To Die @maessseongs
Ji Changmin — Casino Royale @sungbeam
Ju Haknyeon
Kim Sunwoo — On Her Majesty's Secret Service @kimsohn
Eric Sohn — From Russia With Love @cloverdaisies
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sanaxo-o · 4 months ago
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Brought The Heat Back (Kim Sunwoo)
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Warnings/Genre: from friends to strangers to lovers to sum it up, jealous Sunwoo in a good way, fluff, angst ig, kissing scenes, mildly suggestive (wow finally my debut??), Sunwoo gets drunk, Eric being the bestie everyone deserves, cursing ig? I don’t remember honestly, Sunwoo and the reader are both stupid honestly. Idk what else comes here so yeah…tell me if I have to add more
Sana: so I wrote this like last month but had to wait a whole month because I wanted to publish it on Izzy’s birthday. A huge thanks to @deobienthusiast @winterchimez @mosviqu and @itsbeeble for beta reading it and giving me countless compliments 🫶🏻. I honestly loved writing this so I hope you guys enjoy reading it just as much!
Word Count: 4,943
Taglist: @deoboyznet @kimsohn @a-dream-bookmark @cloverdaisies @quaissants @loserlvrss @bella-feed
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Clenching his fist tightly Sunwoo couldn’t help but let out a scoff unknowingly when he saw you flirting with that same guy again. 
It might have been a few weeks since summer break ended but Sunwoo didn’t expect for you to already move on from whatever the two of you had. 
It wasn’t like you both were dating per se. You weren’t but it wasn’t even like you both were just friends. 
I mean from what he knows friends don’t kiss each other, nor do they make out in the summer heat with their fingers intertwined with one another. 
It was like it was yesterday when the two of you were ‘dating’ and while it lasted it was nothing but a safe space of heaven for Sunwoo. 
He was never someone to take a person seriously but with you, it felt different. It was as if you were the one for him the moment the two of you decided to hang out together in summer. 
The way you ditched your friends at the party because he was sitting outside alone. No one had ever done that for him, even though it was just to keep him company Sunwoo still felt his heart swell with content as he listened to you ramble on and on about some plushies you had at your old house in Australia. 
At that very moment Sunwoo had that sudden urge to show you around the town, I mean you were new in the area. You probably didn’t know the most shortcuts so it was kind of his responsibility (it wasn’t) to show you around, no? 
“Do you wanna go for a walk?” He whispers softly as he extends his hand towards you waiting for you to take it. 
Sunwoo could feel his heart racing at an abnormal rate as he waited for your response. The longer you took to answer the more he felt like it was a stupid idea. 
I mean who in the sane mind would walk around a town at night with someone they barely know? 
“Uh sure I guess?” Sunwoo hears your small mumble as you flash him a nervous smile. 
Maybe you were insane enough to do just what he had in mind. 
Heaving out a low chuckle Sunwoo slowly wraps his fingers around yours as he pulls you up from the floor. 
“So why did you come to this town? I mean it’s summer break..” Sunwoo asks as he walks beside you on the empty road. 
“Oh I came here on a scholarship. I wanted to explore more in the summer break and maybe if I like it here I can study here for this semester. That’s what I had in mind so far.” Unknowingly Sunwoo’s eyes light up when he hears your consideration on staying here for the whole semester. 
Maybe it was just because he never had met someone like you but your vibes were just so different from the girls he normally hung out with. 
With others he never felt like he could truly be himself but with you it just felt like he was free. 
Call him crazy for feeling this was about a girl he just met but that was just how he felt and somehow this new feeling was making him feel alive more than anything. 
“Dude why the hell are you staring at Y/N like a creep?” Snapping back to reality Sunwoo throws a glare at Eric as he diverts his attention back to the now you who was just flirting with Hyunjae. 
Seeing you getting all touchy with someone other than him made him feel like punching someone.  
Now that’s something he never felt before because why would he ever feel like punching the guy just because you were flirting with him? It’s not like you guys were dating before for him to feel that way. 
Then why? The more he stared at you smiling at someone who was not him just made him lose his patience. 
If someone said that punching someone without getting in trouble was allowed then he’d waste no time in doing just that because his patience was running too thin for him to control it longer. 
Looking away Sunwoo sighed as he closed his locker with a thud. He knew that if he looked at you for any longer than he might just lose his patience and he did not want to create a scene. 
It’s not his fault he’s feeling that way. It’s just that you have the ability to make anyone want to talk with you more and more. He’s only admitting that because he felt it when you decided to strike a conversation with him for the first time. 
If it was anyone else he would have just rolled his eyes and walked away but when he saw it was you he felt that feeling of getting to know you more. 
The curiosity of knowing you better and spending time with you was bigger than anything else and now seeing you standing there with Hyunjae just made him go crazy. I mean, why were you even flirting with other guys when he was right there? 
“If you’re wondering why you got ditched like that then it’s totally your fault.” Sunwoo hears Eric’s voice say from beside him as he does nothing to deny it. 
He himself knows that you’re ignoring his whole existence and presence because he was the first one to do so. 
He didn’t want to ignore you but he was just scared of hurting you by doing something which wasn’t supposed to be done. He was scared that if he let the relationship you had escalate further, something wrong would happen along the way and he would lose you. 
He did feel like he was gonna commit to it for real this time but then maybe overthinking about making a mistake in the future led him to distance himself with you and now he is the one who has to see you with some other guys who’s not him. 
It’s a weird feeling he’s having but somehow he’s envious of Hyunjae because he gets to be close with you and hear your laugh everyday unlike him who was even scared to approach you now. 
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“Can I ask one thing?” Eric asks Sunwoo who had just entered the classroom and was placing his stuff down. 
“What now?” Sunwoo asks in an annoyed voice as he flashes a glare at Eric and diverts his attention back at you, who was busy talking with that guy again. 
He couldn’t believe you would just ignore his whole existence as if that night didn’t almost take place. 
“No need to get annoyed at me..” Eric mumbles as he heaves out a sigh when he notices Sunwoo’s longing stare at your figure again. 
Eric admits that he has never seen his best friend be this jealous over a certain girl. Now if Eric decided to confront Sunwoo about his jealousy over you then he’d deny it for sure and he didn’t want to argue with his stubborn ass again. 
“You both were talking when the semester started. Why did you cut ties suddenly?” Hearing Eric’s question Sunwoo stiffens in his seat as he remembers the events that took place the night before you both stopped interacting with each other completely. 
Covering his eyes with his hands Sunwoo takes in a deep breath as he tries to get his thoughts straight before answering Eric’s question. 
-x- 
Sunwoo POV 
My ears perk up when I suddenly hear the doorbell ringing. Looking up at the clock I tilt my head in confusion as I see the hands indicating that it was 11 o’clock. 
Why would anyone come over at this hour? I stand up with shaky legs as I grab the pan from the kitchen and take slow and steady steps towards the door. 
Opening the peephole I furrow my eyebrows when I see you standing outside with just a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. 
I let out a yelp when you throw yourself at me the moment I open the door. 
“Hey hey, what’s wro-” I widen my eyes when you kiss me without letting me even complete my sentence fully. 
It’s as if someone had turned the gears in my mind as I immediately sink my lips with yours. The way your tongue was battling with mine to prove dominance was something I had never experienced with you before. 
I snake my hands at the small of your back as I lead you towards my bedroom. Opening the door I push you against the wall as I caress your cheek with my free hand while the other plays with the loose strands of your hair. 
I pull away from the kiss slowly when I feel your hands tapping against my chest. 
I feel a small smile creep up my face when I realise that for once I wasn’t scared of what was going to happen next and I was fully on board with whatever thought you had at the moment. 
“I…were we about to..?” I feel my heart sink when I hear you ask that question. Wait…did you not want it? Was I going too fast? Was I pushing you into doing something you didn’t want? 
“Uh…I don't know. Did you not have the same thing in mind?” I questioned back, as my voice came out shakier than I intended it to be. 
“No..no it’s not that..” I take a step back when you say that, too afraid to hurt you by any chance, “Fuck..I just had a lot in my mind and I didn’t know what I was thinking..” 
My eyes widen when you say that. Worry and concern immediately coming across my face as I reach out to comfort you but retract my hand back when you back away from me. 
“You know what…forget..forget this ever happened. I should go..” I take a step forward to stop you. To tell you that I am there for you to listen to your problems but I didn’t have the guts in me to do so. 
Not after what just happened. What if you were uncomfortable by being around me? That can’t happen though…we always had our own way with our conversations. 
I snap out of my thoughts when I hear my front door close with a thud. It was as if the moment I closed my eyes, your smiling face would flash in my mind. 
From that moment on, I decided that I would distance myself from you. I cannot imagine losing someone like you over something so small…
What if you guys go on a date and get in a relationship? You’re bound to break up and then that break up would lead to you cutting off ties with him. 
And if he does that first then he doesn’t have to worry about you getting hurt more, right? It doesn’t make sense he knows but the way the events turned out at the moment isn’t really letting him think clearly. 
-x- 
“Did Y/N try to approach you the next day?” I look up at Eric when I hear his question. 
I let my pencil slip from my hands as I stopped scribbling around on the book. 
“She did but I may have ignored her…” I mumbled quietly as I shared a look with Eric. I could see his eyes flash a tiny bit of disappointment but he shakes his head and looks ahead at the professor again. 
“Why can’t you just talk it out with her? I am sure she has an explanation for whatever happened and why she stormed out that night.” I look up thoughtfully at his suggestion but quickly shake my head as I ponder on that thought more. 
“Why not?” Eric asks in confusion as he continues staring at me, waiting for my reply but all he got in return was my silence as I slowly diverted my attention back at you. 
I mess my hair up as I feel that weird feeling back at the pit of my stomach. I felt like I was going crazy the more I stared at you smiling so sweetly at hyunjae. It should be me instead of him. 
“WHAT THE HELL!” I yelled loudly when Eric suddenly pushed me off my chair. I glared at him as I looked around the classroom and noticed the countless eyes staring at me but you were still not looking at me. 
It’s as if you just wiped out the fact that I just screamed loudly and possibly hurt myself because of Eric. 
Standing up from the floor I bow as I feel my cheeks starting to burn from embarrassment. Getting back in my seat I shove Eric away from me as I bury my face in between my hands as I try to forget about what just happened. 
“At least tell me now why you won’t confront her.” Eric asks more calmly now as he tries to make me sit straight. 
I sigh as I look at him from the corner of my eyes, “I am scared of what she will reply. It’s better if we both act like it didn’t happen, right?” I reply as I steal one last glance at you and Hyunjae only to look away in less than a second when I feel my head spinning. 
“Do you know what you’re feeling right now?”  I groan when he opens his mouth. Why does he never shut up? 
“What?” I ask in annoyance as I place my head on the table, not taking any interest in whatever he was about to say. 
“Jealousy.” I whip my head at him when he says that. Me? And being jealous? For what? Yeah sure whenever I see you smiling at him I feel that burning sensation, or when you laugh at whatever stupid joke he made. 
I scoff as I shake my head, “Yeah sure. I don’t get jealous over such a trivial matter. I bet I know Y/N better than he does.” I mumble before sliding down on the chair to try and possibly hide myself from the whole world. 
“Tell that to yourself but I sure do see you being jealous.” I flick Eric’s head when he says that again. 
I am definitely not jealous. 
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Y/N POV 
I sighed as I heard Sunwoo’s voice arguing with Eric. It wasn’t a new occurrence for me anymore and honestly I was quite used to it ever since I started hanging out with Sunwoo in summer. 
I’d hate to admit it but Sunwoo was the only guy who honestly made me alive enough in summer (to be frank I never truly enjoyed holidays because I am someone who felt like I needed to be busy and working all the time). 
I diverted my attention back at Hyunjae as I smiled softly at him. He was a good guy but he was not Sunwoo. 
He didn’t have the same aura or personality like Sunwoo and I begged myself to try and find at least some of that charm in Hyunjae which I was dying to see. 
I admit that I was kind of in the wrong to storm out of Sunwoo’s house when we both knew what it was leading to. I didn’t want to make him overthink about my reaction too much but to be frank I was just too damn nervous to think straight that when I snapped back into reality I didn’t know what to do. 
It was as if I didn’t have control over my own body and I just stormed out of there after blabbering some shit which probably made Sunwoo misunderstand the whole situation. 
BUT I did try to explain myself the next day but Sunwoo acted as if nothing had happened the day before and it just made me feel worse about my actions. Did I hurt him that much? Was I too nervous to realise that maybe what it was leading to could have been nice? 
I don’t know but I wish I could just turn back the time and relive the moment so that I don’t make the same mistake as before. 
“Are we set on tonight?” I blink my eyes a few times as I look at hyunjae for a moment only to look away quickly while clearing my throat. 
“Uh for what? I was just spaced out for a moment there.” I mumble as I scribble down the notes in my book in shabby handwriting (I could still read what I wrote so that’s all that matters, no?) 
“Yeah I noticed later on. I was talking about our date. I will pick you up at 8:00. Fine by you?” I nod my head as I chew on my nails as I drift back to the unconditional memories I had made with Sunwoo. 
-x- 
“Sssp!” I flinch when Sunwoo shoves my hand away from my mouth with a hiss escaping his throat. I threw a glare in his direction as I hit the back of his head before slowly bringing my nails back to my mouth only for it to be pulled away by Sunwoo as he intertwined our fingers together to stop me from biting on the nails. 
I could feel my cheeks burning from embarrassment and shyness as I cleared my throat and looked anywhere but at Sunwoo. 
“Look I know you have grown a habit of biting your nails but instead of biting on those nasty nails why don’t you try and talk with me instead? I am here to listen to you, you know?” When I hear those words of Sunwoo it strangely enough comforts me in ways which I never knew were possible. 
I didn’t even know that I wanted to be comforted. Maybe all those thoughts getting jumbled in my brain really messes up with what I really need. 
I give Sunwoo a small nod as I look ahead again, “Well now you have me to stop you from biting your nails.” Sunwoo whispers as he pokes my cheeks with his other finger. 
I just chuckle at that and bring my other hand up to squeeze his cheeks. The way I loved it when he pouted I thought as I smiled at him fondly. 
-x-
I look back at Sunwoo in thought, my face contorted with slight pain as I try my best not to have a breakdown over not only Sunwoo but also just about life in general.  
I feel my heart racing rapidly when I make eye contact with Sunwoo. It was as if it was just the two of us in the room and everyone else had either just disappeared or they were in slow motion. 
It didn’t seem to last long since before I could even offer a smile at Sunwoo he had already looked away. 
Oh how I wish I could change this awkward phase in whatever relationship we had and just go back to how it used to be. 
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I kick the rocks on the ground as I try to drown out the voices in the background. Well the date did not go well per se (it’s not Hyunjae’s fault. It’s just…I couldn’t help but only think about Sunwoo while Hyunjae was busy talking. It’s as if no matter how hard I try Sunwoo would always be at the back of my mind and it’s driving me insane.) 
I roll my eyes when I feel my phone vibrating in my bag, I let it ring as I was in no mood to talk with anyone. 
Looking up from the ground, my eyes sparkle when I see an ice cream shop. I start walking towards it when my phone starts vibrating again. 
I sigh as I open my bag to take a look at the caller ID but what  I did not expect was the caller ID flashing on the screen. 
‘Why the hell is Sunwoo calling me?’ I think as I slowly accept the call while walking towards the shop. 
“Is this Y/N?” I stop walking when I hear an unknown voice on the other side. I couldn’t help but think the worst. 
Did Sunwoo get himself in trouble? Did he hurt himself? Is he okay? 
“Yes, that's her..” I replied. I could hear Sunwoo’s voice at a distance but it seemed to be coming out slurred. I couldn’t help but furrow my eyebrows together in confusion. 
“I am sorry but I think your boyfriend is drunk…” I slap my hand against my forehead when I hear that but immediately feel my cheeks heat up when I hear the word boyfriend. 
“Where is he right now?” I ask shyly as I immediately call a taxi to go over at the location the person told me. 
-x- 
Why the hell is this guy drinking alone at night and that too in a PARK? Did he for real lose it or is he close to losing it? 
I quicken my pace when I see Sunwoo sitting on a bench with a guy trying to keep him straight and awake so that he doesn’t fall asleep in the park. 
I approach them as I take over Sunwoo and apologise to the man and grab Sunwoo cheeks which were a slight shade of pink. 
I sit beside him on the bench and slap his cheeks a few times to help him gain some consciousness. 
I giggle when he blinks his eyes a few times and stares at me for a second before he brings his hands up as he drags his fingers over my lower lips. 
I push his hand away slightly as I mumble softly, “You’re not sober. So, you’re not allowed to touch me.” 
A small stupid smile creeps up on Sunwoo’s face as he brings his hand back to himself as he rubs his eyes while speaking, “So am I allowed to touch you when I am sober?” He mumbles before staring back at you. 
“If I say yes will you shut up?” I mumble as my eyes trail down to his swollen lips for a second before I glance back at his eyes again. 
I smile when he gives a gentle nod, standing up I extend my hand out towards him to help him stand up, “I am only saying yes because I know you will forget all about this in the morning.” I mumble as I drag him towards the cab which was waiting for us. 
“Do you really think so?” He slurs out the words while getting in the car, “Ack!” He yelps in pain when his head bangs against the roof of the car. 
I immediately lean forward and take a look at his forehead. My eyebrows furrow in worry when it starts to swell but all Sunwoo does is laugh at the drunken guy he saw outside (who was busy puking by the way.) 
-x- 
I enter the house with Sunwoo as I drag him towards his bed. Okay, all I had to do was throw him on his bed, put a warm blanket over him and wash his face with a wet towel. 
I can do that without thinking about the past, right? Of course I can! 
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Sunwoo POV 
I groan in pain when I feel my head throbbing. Maybe drinking till late at night was a bad idea but how did I even get home? I don’t think I went to drink with any of my friends. 
Grabbing the glass of water from the bedside table, I drink some of it when my attention drifts to my arm. I see some messy writing on it. 
Getting curious, I place the glass down and take a closer look at my arm after blinking a few times to get rid of the blurriness. 
‘She says I could touch her when I am sober.’ She? Who’s she…
I close my eyes as I try to think back to the moments which took place yesterday. 
“No fucking way…” I gasp as I recall the conversations me and Y/N had. Nooo this is so embarrassing. She saw me being a drunk idiot. 
I place my head in my pillow and scream in it as I try my best to hide my whole existence. Why can’t the world just swallow me right now? 
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Entering the auditorium I see Y/N with that Hyunjae guy again. Gosh…he looks so boring. What did she even see in him? 
I scowl as I take a seat right behind them because someone decided it would be a great idea to sit behind my ex who was not really my ex because we never officially dated BUT we did kiss and make out a couple of times but let’s not talk about that. 
I kick Eric’s leg when he strikes up a conversation with Hyunjae. He was my sworn enemy! How could he just talk with that boring ass? Gosh this kid really needs to level his taste up when it comes to talking with just anyone. 
The whole time the lecture was going on not once did I stop burning holes in the back of Y/N’s head. 
I could tell she wanted to look back at me by turning around but maybe I was just looking too handsome that she didn’t even want to take a look at me.  
Heaving out a sigh I stood up once the lecture was over. 
“I think we should talk…” I stop dead in my tracks when I hear her voice. No fucking way is she talking with me? 
I gulp as I look at her for a moment before I immediately look down at the books in my hands. 
I hand the books to Eric without any second thoughts as I follow you to the back of the auditorium. 
I sit down on the floor as you follow behind and do the same. I couldn’t believe that after so long we’re finally talking again but I could feel my heartbeat rising more as you stretched the already tense moment.  
“What’s up?” I mumble out as I try not to make it sound awkward even though the way I spoke already gave away the fact that it was more than just awkward silence. 
I cover my face with my eyes as I wait for you to start speaking again, “So…about that night.” I hear your voice speak from beside me. 
I slowly bring my hands down as I take a small peek at you, “You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to. I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable.” 
“No no you didn’t make me uncomfortable. I was just nervous…I was scared I would do something wrong and embarrass myself.” I just stare at you as you explain yourself. 
“I am sorry…I am sorry that I didn’t even give you the chance to explain yourself. I hate to admit it but I was scared to listen to your explanation.” I say softly as I take your hand in mine. 
I smile when I hear your small giggle. Oh how I missed making you laugh…
“So what do you think about Hyunaje?” I furrow my eyebrows when you ask me that question. Were you really pulling my leg? 
“Hyunjae? I hate that guy. Who does he think he is?” I mumble as I scoff in irritation.
I stare at you again when you laugh at my answer. You were really enjoying this, no? “What if I go on another date with him?” 
It feels as if my eyes almost bulge out when you ask that question. “Date? I dare you. I will come and burn everything that is there and take you away from there.” I mumble as I kiss the back of your hand while our fingers are still intertwined. 
“Aww you’re such a jealous baby.” I scoff and roll my eyes and mumble out a small ‘I am not jealous’ when even I know it’s not the truth. 
“I am kidding. I hope we can give our relationship another chance?” My eyes light up when you finally say the words I wanted to hear. 
“I swear I won’t mess up this time.” I say quietly as I kiss the crown of your forehead and give a peck on your cheeks.  
“So what did you feel like when you used to see Hyunjae and me together?” I just stare at you silently when you ask that question. 
You really were having fun teasing me. I get up and walk out of the room with you following behind while laughing at my jealous ass. 
I stop on my tracks when I see hyunjae being buddies with Eric. I couldn’t help the disgusted face taking over my facial features as I stared at that guy doing some stupid handshake with Eric. 
“I cannot believe you’re jealous over Eric and Hyunjae now.” I side eye you when you say that and flick your forehead once before walking away with you yelling my name out. 
“Geez I am sorry!” I yell loudly when you suddenly come in front of me and kiss me on the lips. 
I smiled in between the kiss when I noticed you going on your tiptoes just to kiss me. I slowly lean down so that it’s easier for you to kiss me. 
Giggling I look at you when you pull away, your cheeks slowly turning hues of red as mine does the same.  “Maybe I am a jealous guy after all.” I mumble as I hug you tightly.
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Too @from-izzy : happiest birthday to my flower, my honey bee, the Sunwoo to my Chanhee <3 it’s been like almost a year since we knew each other??? Can you believe it 😭. We got so close so quickly that it’s crazy. Me calling you while walking back home and giving you a tour as I yap and you just sitting there and listening to me might be one of the best things we do 😼. Thank you for always being there for me when I needed to talk with someone the most 💗. You might be the only mutual who knows the most about me and it’s kind of crazy how our first conversation started with me flirting with you but I guess that’s my charm lol. Will always listen to you deny your feelings for Sunwoo but it’s okay since it’s you. Honestly I’d do anything to never lose our friendship which we built over the year and it’s just so pretty. Anyways, I’d never come to Australia since it’s pretty scary there but you’re always welcome to come to India 🥰. With that being said, I hope we always continue bickering, nagging each other over things and what not. And no, I will never stop sending you hot pics of Sunwoo 🧍‍♀️. With that being said, happy birthday to you my flower and I hope you like this little something I prepared. I swear I will try my best to publish watch it in October if it doesn’t come out in September (I really don’t think it will ever come out tho…) 🥰. I do hope you understand the small references I added in here bitch 👹. Was honestly so hard keeping this a secret :( Love you and have a great day (and years ahead) (plz stop overworking and stressing yourself out too much and start sleeping on time…)
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