#clearly i felt like pain tonight what's new :)
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cursivebloodlines ¡ 1 year ago
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“  i’m not the person you want.  i know you think i am.  but it won’t take long for you to realize this is a mistake.  ” - for logan
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Logan's heart clenched in his chest, the weight of her words crashing over him like a relentless storm. How could she say that? His face painted a picture of disbelief and anguish as he took a step back, his wounded expression bared for her to see. The gravity of her misguided statement stabbed at him, cutting through his soul like a knife. "What the fuck does that mean?" he spat out incredulously, frankly hurt she could say something like that to him. How long had he loved her in silence? How long had he loved her out loud? Facing unrequited love time and time again only for her to choose him when his heart was supposed to belong to someone else?
Timing, cruel and unforgiving, had conspired against him. Just as he had started a new chapter with someone else, there she was, disrupting the delicate balance he had fought so hard to establish and preserve their friendship. Yet, despite his newfound connection, his heart still clung desperately to the idea of being with Danielle. He had been prepared to abandon everything, willing to risk it all for a chance at love with her. His devotion remained steadfast, unwavering. And now there she was, trying to drive another wedge between them, a wedge that she was now forcing on him against his will.
"It's not a mistake. It has never been a mistake," Logan spoke, his voice cracking with emotion. His hands trembled as he ran them through his hair, a futile attempt to calm the tsunami of emotions raging within him. The fear of scaring her away forced him to tread carefully, to temper the intensity of his words. "I love you. Dan," he whispered, his voice filled with a plea. "How many times do you need to hear it? Want me to shout it from the rooftops so the rest of the world can hear it? I can do that. I will do that, whatever you want. Just tell me." With trembling hands, he reached out, gently clasping her hands in his, hoping that his touch could bridge the growing chasm between them. The pressure of his grip conveyed the silent desperation that consumed him. "I have never been so sure of anything in my life."
A frown etched itself upon Logan's face, his gaze shifting downwards to their intertwined hands. It seemed easier to focus on their connection, to avoid how vulnerable he felt whenever he looked directly into her eyes. As each passing second ticked away, his thoughts grew more tangled, weaving together a disheartening possibility he did not want to consider. He might be wrong but… couldn't escape the doubts that clawed at his already fragile heart. Did she experience a change of heart, a sudden shift in her feelings for him again, and decided she didn't feel that way about him after all? Was she protecting him from the anguish of rejection once more, convincing him that he didn't want her rather than inflicting further pain?
"Do you believe this is a mistake? Is that why you're saying all these things? All this…this bullshit?" Logan's voice shook again, the vulnerability laid bare for her to witness. What more did he have to lose? He was losing her all over again. "Tell me the truth. I can handle it. Haven't we already been down this road once or twice before?" The words escaped his lips, laced with bitterness. He regretted his spiteful tone, but the pain that consumed him left little room for restraint. His heart, battered and bruised, questioned how much more it could endure, especially from her. "I tried to move on from you, Danielle. And I did, remember?" he trailed off, attempting to conceal the heartbreak that reverberated through his voice, but it proved futile. Logan never was a man to hold back. Not for anyone, really. As much as he may have tried. "I threw it all away for you because I believed… I believed that you finally - you wanted me… that you wanted me as much as I've always wanted you. Please, just… put an end to this. I know what I want. The question is: do you?"
some angst idk ya'll i like crying | Accepting
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97linelover ¡ 4 months ago
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don´t let me slip away, please. - Jeon Wonwoo
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18+ / mdi
summary: Dating an Idol was not always easy, you once again felt it with their newest comeback.
What if your Boyfriend pushes you away and you could only watch?
content: Idol Wonwoo x non Idol reader, fight,angst, happy end,fluff, smut
wc: 2.2 k
a/n: I always think about, how tiring comebacks must be for idols so I wrote down this AU.
The most painful thing is seeing your partner suffer but not being able to help.
That's exactly how you feel right now with Wonwoo.
Ever since the announcement of the new seventeen the best album, you have watched him slip out of your grip. You felt his distance, and you felt him closing up on you.
Jeon Wonwoo became so distant that you felt like the love he held for you was gone.
When the album release came, he was long gone before you woke up. You had ordered a small cake in the album theme. But in the morning, Wonwoo was long gone; his bag was gone, and you looked at your phone.
„Nonu: filming for MNET right now; I don't know when I'll be home. I didn't want to wake you. I love you."
A soft sigh escaped your lips, and you locked your phone again, trying to sleep some more.
It was the third show they had this week, and you know how exhausted he must be. While comebacks were amazing for the fans, they were exhausting for the artists.
You got ready and decided to watch the recording of today's set. For this comeback, you took some days off to support Wonwoo, but he did not appreciate it in the slightest.
Haru guided you inside the studio, where you heard the screams of the fans and the fan chant. A smile appeared on your lips, and you watched the boys do what they're best at.
But at the end, you could clearly see their exhaustion, their painted smiles, and their dull eyes. You saw how Wonwoo supported himself on Mingyu, and he tried his best to smile. The fans cheered and cheered, and you felt yourself getting sadder with each passing moment.
The comeback times were unbelievable hard, and if you did not date an idol, you would never know. 
When they got off the stage, you quickly went towards your boyfriend. „Nonu, you were amazing," you said with a bright smile, and he looked at you. „Y/N, what are you doing here?" he asked, surprised, and you shrugged. „I took some time off, and I wanted to surprise you." You threw your arms around his neck.
„You were so good," you kissed him softly. He felt distant, and his kisses did not feel like home tonight. 
„I will get changed," he announced softly, pushing you away, and you felt your heart fall into your stomach. „Okay, baby, I'll wait here," you smiled slightly, and he nodded, walking inside the changing room.
When he came back, dressed in his casual street wear, you watched him carefully. „Wanna head home?" You asked him curiously, and he nodded. „I could use a nap," he yawned.
Inside the black van, he typed on his phone, „When did you leave?" Your voice brought him back to reality, „4:30 in the morning," and he did not talk to you again for the ride.
And when you entered the house, he went for a shower while you began to cook. Wonwoo was always hungry when he finished a busy schedule.
You heard the bathroom door closing, and Wonwoo walked inside the kitchen dressed in some boxers and a shirt. „I made your favorite." You smiled proudly at him, and he yawned again. „I'm not that hungry, maybe after a nap, but thanks," he said as he walked inside the bedroom without looking back. 
You felt the tears in your eyes, and you grabbed a plate when Mingyu walked in. "Mhm, smells good," he said, looking over your shoulder. "Do you want some?" You filled the plate, and he sat down with you. "Did Wonu already eat?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "No, he's taking a nap." You shrugged. "Is everything alright between you two?" Mingyu asked with concern in his voice, "I guess." You just smiled and got up.
"When Wonwoo is waking up, tell him I'm staying at mine tonight." You put on your shoes. 
"Y/N," Mingyu's voice made you look back. "There will be better times, believe me." You felt a single tear rolling down your cheek. "I really don't know Mingyu," you whispered, and you began your journey home.  Your flat was about 45 minutes away from Minwon's home, and normally Wonwoo would freak out to let you take the bus, especially since your area was not the best. 
You barely slept there anymore since you dated Wonwoo; he had built a small vanity for you with all your cosmetics inside; his wardrobe had extra space for your stuff; and in the shower, your Strawberry Showergel was very prominent. 
Mingyu became your best friend, and you three always went out, watched movies, talked about their day, and asked about yours.
When you arrived at home, you typed in a quick "I'm home xx" to Wonwoo, only to be ignored the entire night.  At first, you thought that maybe he slept through. But you did know that he was awake, and you did know that he went live to play some games. 
So overall, you felt like he was falling out of love with you, and after all, you could never force someone to love you. 
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When you wrote your article for your work project the next day, you saw the notification of their scheduled get-together.  They organized a meet-up with 50 Lucky fans, and they would perform for them. They would eat with them, and after that, they would get the biggest cake ever. 
You were in charge of the cake because Jiyoung, the manager of the boys, forgot about it, but luckily you found a bakery. 
So here you are now, carrying a huge cake inside the venue. With the help of some staff members, you placed it on a stroller. 
"Where's Wonu?" you asked Jiyoung while wiping your hands clean. 
"They're in the dressing room; this is the last outfit change, and then they're done, and you two can go home," he chuckled slightly when he noticed how happy you were. You hurried through the floor, and you could already hear them talking, "Did you hear from Y/N last night?" Mingyu asked his best friend while he got his make-up retouched. 
"She just texted me that she got home safe; I don't even know why she left in the first place," he shrugged. "But you don't like her going home late; she told me you were pretty distant." You could hear how confused Mingyu was. 
"I was kind of relieved to be alone for a while; she's kind of annoying at the moment." You felt your breath hitch. "She always is around me; as if I'm not stressed enough, she tags along to everything." Wonwoo's voice sounded annoyed, and you tried your best not to utter a word. 
"Bro, she is your girlfriend; you barely see her with our schedule, and you really complain when she takes time for you? I would be happy to see Lia every day," Jihoon said, confused and kind of disappointed. 
"I'm fucking tired, okay? I'm fucking annoyed with her; all she does is chase my tail like a lost puppy," he spat and got up to leave the room. Jiyoung walked past you. "Y/N, why are you out here?" he asked, confused while opening the door wider.
Wonwoo's gaze found yours, and he saw the pain in your eyes. "Y/N," he whispered, but you quickly looked away. "I forgot that I have some papers due; I will, uh, I will go home now," you blabbered and bumped against a staff member. 
You realized your wet eyes were the reason why you could not walk straight; you heard footsteps behind you, and then you got pulled against a buff chest. "Hey, you should not drive like this," a Mingyus voice rang through your eyes, and you sobbed. "I don't care; I need to get out of here." You pushed him away. "You heard him, huh?" he sighed. "I sure did, and now I finally know where I stand in his life." You let out a sarcastic laugh. "I won't annoy him anymore." You looked over his shoulder where Wonwoo was looking at you. 
"Baby," he began, but you shook your head. "I won't push you anymore. Don't worry, I will not push you anymore." You shook your head. "I will not be there anymore." With that, you ran out of the building. 
One thing about Seoul is that if you want to get lost, you can. 
You ran along the streets until you did not know where you were. You found a bench where you waited for a Kakao car. The tear stains on your cheek made the driver look concerned, but he drove you to your building regardless, and a small question about whether you were okay in between made you smile slightly. 
You told him that you were okay, but you sure did not feel like it was okay. 
So this is how you found yourself on the couch inside your flat, wearing your fluffy bathrobe after you took a warm bath.  You were craving chicken and beer, so when the doorbell rang, you jumped up. "Coming!" you yelled, grabbing your wallet. 
When you opened the door, Wonwoo was standing in front of you. "Well, not my chicken," you muttered, and he looked at you with his brown eyes; they were bloodshot. "What do you want?" you whispered, and you felt the tears again. "I wanted to see you," he whispered. 
"Oh, you do? I thought you wanted some free time; I thought I'm annoying." You crossed your arms, and Wonwoo closed his eyes. "Can I come inside?" He whispered, "I don't think we should do this; I think we should break off." You whispered, and Wonwoo's eyes widened. "What? No!"
You felt your heartbreak. "I love you, Wonwoo; I love you so much it hurts," you sobbed. "But you called me annoying; you described me as a burden even though I only want to give you love." You walked inside with him behind you. 
"I don't want to be the reason you're unhappy, so I think it's best if I won't be a part of your life; you're stressed all the time, and normally I should be the one to take the stress off your shoulders." You looked at him, and you saw how tears were now streaming down his cheeks. "No, baby, I'm the one to blame; you do nothing but make me happy," he said, taking your hand. 
"This comeback is the biggest we've had so far; it's indescribable; I felt overwhelmed; I felt exhausted and tired; and you were the person that was the closest to me," he choked out a sob. "God, without you, I could not do that; you are my person, baby; you bring me down; I need you." 
"I let out my shit mood at you, and I am so sorry; you're not annoying, fuck no. Youre the best thing I have; I don't want to separate; I want us forever, baby," he cupped your face. "Please don't leave me," he whispered.
You felt like your heart had broken into a thousand pieces. 
"I won't," you whispered, "but please talk to me; please tell me if something's wrong; we are in this together.". 
"God, I love you so much," he whispered, and he kissed you softly. You felt his salty tears on his lips; you felt the need inside this kiss. 
"I love you too." You pulled him closer, and he lifted you up, carrying you inside the bedroom. 
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You were cuddled against his chest, and he played around with your hair. "I missed my mom's death anniversary; because we were on tour, I could not visit her grave; I felt like shit because of this," you sat up straight.
"Nonu baby, your mom would be so proud of you, and she knows where you are right now. Don't break your head over that, okay? We can visit her grave tomorrow; don't be so harsh on yourself," you kissed his cheek. 
"I still feel so bad for what I said," he whispered, and you shrugged. "It happened, Nonu; I know you're sorry." He stroked your cheek with his thumb. "Move in with me," he whispered, and your eyes widened. "What?" you gasped, and he smiled. 
"I want you with me all the time, and Mingyu loves your company." He pulled you onto his lap, and you giggled. "You're sure about that?" He nodded. "God, woman, your neighborhood is a nightmare." 
You pouted, "Not everyone can be rich." You mocked him, and he laughed, "But baby, the perks of me being rich are that I can spoil you." He turned you both around and softly placed kisses along your stomach. 
"But I don't want that," you whimpered, and you felt him smirk against your skin. "I know, but love, I will spoil you anyways."  He parted your legs "because I adore you.". 
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mmeskywalker ¡ 7 months ago
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|| new years and blooming hearts
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summary: you’re in pansy’s dorm getting ready to go to the slytherin new year’s eve party. only, you’re a hufflepuff… you arrive to the party and the tension between you and THEODORE NOTT is palpable; so palpable in fact that matteo and enzo decide to help a brother out (by making theodore so insanely jealous that he arrived to his breaking point.) through breathless laughter, cold stares and tough crowds, you find yourself by theo, oddly enough during the countdown til midnight.
word count: 6.6k+
a/n: this is lowercase intended. i just wanted to write about theodore nott/lorenzo zurzolo because he has me in a chokehold. also, i read a fic with a similar concept to this but i can’t find it. if anyone knows which fic i’m referring to, please tag the creator in the comments.
- please imagine theodore with an italian accent, thanks!!! 😓
warnings: italian!theo. jealous!theo. angsty. friends to lovers. slowburn. oblivious reader and theo (they’re both clearly in love). love confession. tension. heavy kissing. pansy x blaise.
6:00P.M.
“okay… so what i’m hearing is that you hate me and want me to die.” you flinched at the dress pansy held to your body, your nose twitching as you dramatically gagged.
it was yellow with black stripes, reminding you of the bee movie you had previously watched with her and your friends in the slytherin common room.
pansy was cackling beside you; her hair hanging low in her face as loud snorts tumbled from her nose. “no—no you have to hear me out,” she cackled. “it’s perfect! it’ll match your house and everything, baby.”
“you know what else is perfect?” your lips twitched into a malice smile.
“what?” she was still laughing, hardly able to contain herself as she ran her fingers through her hair.
grabbing your wand, you pointed it toward the dress. “evanesco!” you quickly shouted, a smirk now adorning your lips as the fabric disappeared from her grasp.
“you’re no fun,” she pouted, her laughter ceasing before giggles bubbled right back up again. “i’ll tell you what, i think i do have a dress for you to wear. trust me?” she asked, still giggling as she cocked her head to the side.
“i don’t know…” you teased, “are you going to pull out another bumblebee catastrophe?”
“no, i promise.” she interlocked her pinky with yours, the laughter finally dying down.
after a moment, you sat on her bed, your head leaning against the headboard as you waited for her to find what she was looking for in the mess she called ‘closet’.
your fingers danced around your wand, attempting to spin it around your unskilled grasp—only for it to end up dropping to your side. you blew out a stream of tense air. “have you found it yet?” you impatiently wailed.
“hold on,” she replied, annoyed.
after holding on for what felt like half an hour — two minutes max — she found the dress she was looking for
and it was beautiful.
it was a black dress with spaghetti straps that would clearly hug your body; long, plain, but gorgeous; just what you wanted.
“pans, it’s perfect.” you said, excitement rushing through your veins before it pained back down. well shit, you thought as your heart practically pounded in your chest.
tonight was the slytherin house party hosted to celebrate the new year. you’re a hufflepuff, a hufflepuff that managed to befriend the group of slytherin that everyone wanted but couldn’t become friends with. you knew most of the slytherin house disliked you, but your friends were feared, nobody dared to say too much about you to your face.
how sweet of them, you thought.
“yeah, it’s nothing special, but paired with a few gold accessories and your pretty face it’s going to look great!” pansy set the dress on the blanket beside you, her hands smoothing out the nonexistent wrinkles before meeting your gaze. “woah— hey what’s wrong?” she asked.
“uh,” you stuttered, looking toward the dress once, twice, before making eye contact with her again. “nothing’s— wrong?” you said, clearly trying to convince yourself of that matter rather than her.
you weren’t too emotional, always being able to hold a strong ground, but you had your days; like most hufflepuff. you guessed that today was one of those days.
great.
“baby, what’s wrong?” pansy asked again, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. “you know i’d never seriously make fun of you, right? you can talk to me,” she laughed softly, looking at you with an understanding gaze.
“it’s stupid.” you muttered, a smile creeping on your face despite the heavy turmoil in your chest. “i don’t even know if i should be going to this party… i don’t belong there.”
pansys brows furrowed. “whose making you feel like you don’t belong there?” she was upset, that of which you could tell.
“uh, everyone?” you responded as if it were as plain as day. “well, not you and our friends of course… but everyone else. they so-obviously don’t want me at their party, and i understand that; i mean, i’m a hufflepuff.”
pansy rolled her eyes. “screw them,” she said. “i want you there. matteo wants you there, enzo, draco, and blaise, all want you there.” her eyes glistened in the dim candlelighting, squinting as she drawled out her last sentence with an undeniable tease, “theo wants you there.”
pansy has known about your little crush on theo for years. it started in third year, when he began calling you that nickname you’ve just recently learned the meaning to: soffio.
it meant puff; a simple word that referred to your house, but it made your heart flutter.
he gave you that nickname
and it meant the world to you.
however, your delusions were just delusions. he didn’t know how much that name meant to you because he made it out of ridicule; a teasing ridicule, but ridicule at that.
“whatever,” you rolled you eyes, your thumb brushing away the singular tear rolling down your flushed cheek.
pansy smiled, getting out of bed, grabbing your hands to pull you off of the mattress as well. “you’re coming tonight,” she sing-songed. “and you don’t have a choice.”
7:30P.M.
"are you ready yet?!" pansy yelled against the bathroom door, pounding on it as you stared at yourself in the mirror.
your eyes shifted down the length of your body.
the dress looked just as good on as you imagined it would in your head, and if you were being honest, you're more-so holding her up to stare at yourself a little longer.
cocky, but whatever because you felt and looked amazing.
“one second!” you shouted, fluffing your hair up softly to make it look as if you ‘rolled out of bed’ in a perfect, flawless type way.
you could hear the sarcasm dripping from her tone as she counted, “one,” but you had already opened the door.
she looked stunning as well, wearing a long-sleeved, dark green dress with three gold rings forming a line down her slightly exposed chest.
“pansy, baby, you look so freaking pretty!” you squealed, your hands intertwined with hers mid-air as you both grinned at each other like overly-excited school girls. “me? oh my gosh, what about you?!” she said, her hands moving to your shoulders and rocking you gently as her eyes glistened. “you look so, so gorgeous, y/n!!!”
“i think theo’s going to have a mannerism,” she teased and you rolled your eyes.
“whatever,” you giggled.
. . . . . ╰──╮꒰ 🤍 ꒱ ╭──╯ . . . . .
8:00P.M.
two hundred slytherin and one hufflepuff,
two hundred slytherin and one hufflepuff,
two hundred slytherin and one hufflepuff,
but you’re only focused on six of them.
the six you felt safest around:
pansy parkinson (duh),
matteo riddle,
lorenzo berkshire,
(somehow) draco malfoy,
blaise zabini,
and theodore nott.
obviously, you didn’t walk in unnoticed.
matteo immediately sat up from the couch, making his way over to you as he watched you walk in with pansy. “funny seeing you here,” he teased, “how’s my favorite hufflepuff doing?” his arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you in closer to kiss the top of your head.
“yeah, yeah,” you rolled your eyes, laughing as you pushed him away. “and i’m okay, a little nervous, but i’m all good. y’know?”
“nervous?” matteo asked, cocking a brow.
you shot him a look and he quickly understood. “ah, no need to worry about them.” he promised, “they’ll be dealt with if they do anything.”
your forehead wrinkled slightly as you shot him a weary smile. “thanks.” you replied coolly, noticeably unsure of his intentions.
from across the room, theo’s eyes lit up, his frown transforming into a soft, bright smile as he made his way through the thick crowd to get to you. “soffio, you’re here.” his lips brushed against your hair, his arms wrapped around your head, pulling your cheek flat against his chest.
his italian accent was thick and heavy, harder to understand as his voice muffled into the depths of your hair, but you still felt a blush crawl over your flesh.
“theo—“ you muttered, your voice just as muffled as he pulled you even closer, one hand cupping the back of your neck while the other threaded through your hair, “i thought you weren’t going to show up, bella, i was worried,” he then whispered.
matteo shot him a look.
“theo you’re crushing me!” you giggled, your hands crawling up his chest to create a little distance between the two of you.
his large hand gently caressed your cheek; four fingers stroking your jaw as his thumb lingered in its original place, now smiling as he pulled away. “mi dispiace,” he whispered before turning his attention to the friend making his way over.
"i'm surprised you showed up," blaise drawled, leaning against the wall with an amused smirk. "thought you'd run the other way once you heard who all was coming." despite his words, there was warmth in his gaze as it met yours, a spark of admiration glinting in their depths.
“oh, shut up,” pansy hit his side, rolling her eyes. “if you scare her away i’ll beat your ass,” she then whispered, eyes squinting as she playfully bit down on her words.
“relax, ma.” he chuckled, his hands falling to her hips, squeezing them gently as he leaned down to kiss her, “let’s go get a drink, yeah?”
“and that’s my cue to leave,” pansy playfully hit your thigh, shooting a quick glance to theo as if she knew something you didn’t, “don’t do too much without me.”
you shivered as you watched her walk away, your mind racing at what she could have meant; knowing her, it could be anything.
draco entered the room then, scanning the gathering with a faint smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. he hesitated when he spotted you surrounded by the others, finally shrugging as if it wouldn't bother him either way before striding over. "y/l/n," he greeted coolly, shooting a smug look at matteo and theodore. "happy almost new year."
you wrinkled your nose at draco, a playful challenge lighting up in your eyes. "happy almost new year to you too, malfoy."
lorenzo approached last, his gaze taking in the group with a slow appraisal before he settled on you. there was something unreadable lurking behind his dark eyes, a mixture of surprise and a slight hint of desire. "quite the turnout," he murmured.
weird, you thought.
"aye, quite the turnout," matteo replied, chuckling softly as he placed a hand on lorenzo's shoulder. there was a brief moment of tension between them as they glanced toward you and theo, a silent understanding passing between the two of them before both men simply let it slide.
what seemed to you as theo ignoring their odd behavior, he turned to face everyone, clapping his hands together. "ah," he grinned, his voice full of mirth. "glad you decide to join us, lorenzo." theo patted his side.
lorenzo grinned, patting theo’s side in return, “wouldn’t wanna be here with anyone else.” he replied before looking toward the brunette woman he felt eyeing him down. “except maybe her,” he then smirked.
you heard matteo sigh, muttering a series of curse words as draco snickered beside him.
“whore,” draco spoke as if his commentary were a compliment, but lorenzo was too busy undressing the girl with his eyes to notice.
“well go up to her,” you groaned, rolling your eyes teasingly as you pushed him away from the circle. “don’t be a puss; drinking her up from afar is an unattractive trait, berkshire.”
he stumbled, his palms brushing down his white suit before glancing over at matteo. then, he turned around to wink at you playfully. “oh, you’re in for it later,” he chuckled. “wish me luck, love.”
‘good luck,’ you mouthed as he began to walk toward the girl, the tension in the room shifting.
theo scowled at lorenzo, three fingers rubbing against his thumb as matteo teasingly brushed the italian’s side. “chill,” he whispered, a shady smile playing on his lips.
“do not tell me to chill,” theo’s voice rose. “i am chill, no need to tell me to chill if i am already.”
your brows furrowed slightly, confused as to why theo snapped so suddenly. “everything okay?” you asked, your thumb rubbing soothing circles against his bicep before he blew out a sigh.
“yes, soffio,” he shakily assured, finding the hand you placed on his bicep, sliding it into his palm, and kissing your knuckles gently. “i’m— i’m okay.”
matteo grinned brightly as an idea struck his mind. “alcohol, anyone?”
8:30P.M.
you were trying not to spill your drink as you made your way back through the crowd. yeah, you were wearing a black dress, so you guessed that a stain wouldn’t really matter… but you still hated the feeling of wet fabric against your skin.
“ow,” you muttered as you bumped into matteo’s chest. don’t worry, you did not spill your beverage.
you were about to apologize until you noticed lorenzo standing beside him, now turning to stand behind you. your brows furrowed to the bridge of your nose. staring at them intensely, you asked, “uh, what exactly do you think you’re doing?”
“we’re going to help you out, girlfriend,” matteo smirked, his eyes a dangerous game, his tone slithering directly into one ear then finding its way out the next.
“like i said,” you scowled. “uh, what?”
“do you want a new years kiss or not?” lorenzo asked, his palm finding your waist to keep you steady as you tried to walk away.
you slapped his hand. “not from you, berkshire.” you spat.
“obviously not from me, idiot.” he rolled his eyes. “from theodore.”
your eyes lit.
matteo cocked his brow, “there might be one before new years though if he doesn’t crack.”
this time, you did spill your drink—a little of the liquid dripping from the rim of your cup as your hand jerked forward. ��what are you talking about, matty?” your voice dripped with disgust as you then slapped lorenzo’s hand away from your waist, “and let go of me.”
“do you like theodore or not?” matteo asked, clearly annoyed.
“none of the bullshit either, sweetheart.” lorenzo dragged. “everyone can tell you’re crazy about the guy, there’s no point in hiding it anymore.”
“you know what they say…new year, new confessions.” matteo cocked a brow, waiting for you to come clean.
you huffed, the need to correct him strong as you rolled your eyes. “they don’t say that,” you said, but you were now looking toward the ground… “okayyesiliketheo,” you muttered.
“what was that?” lorenzo asked, a teasing smile apparent on his lips. “one more time for me, love?”
“yes; merlin, yes, okay! i like theo,” you bit in a faint yet deadly whisper. “what do you want from me? a cookie?”
matteo smirked, looking around before taking a step closer to you, “atta girl.” he said, “enzo and i’ve been thinking,” - “not a good sign.” - “girl, shut up. we were thinking and we know a way to get theo to confess his feelings.”
before you could ask how, you felt lorenzo’s proximity come closer as well. “he’s protective over you, that we all know.”
you couldn’t necessarily see enzo roll his eyes, but you could hear the eye roll in his tone.
“we’re going to make him jealous.” matteo added.
lorenzo nodded, “precisely.”
he stumbled, his palms brushing down his white suit before glancing over at matteo. then, he turned around to wink at you playfully. "oh, you're in for it later," he chuckled. "wish me luck, love."
'good luck, you mouthed.
“see, you were playing along before you even realized.” matteo nudged your shoulder playfully and you finally laughed, easing up a bit.
“you really think this is going to work?” you asked, a little unsure of the whole situation.
to that, lorenzo scoffed. “i know it’s going to work.” he stated. “darling, theo is head over heels for you; you’re all he talks about. let’s just consider this to be theo’s wake up call.”
9:00P.M.
you’re now wineless.
you downed three cup-fulls of the substance to take your mind off the fact you’re sitting on lorenzo berkshire’s lap at a party; a guy you’ve always thought of as a brother.
“i’m sorry.” he whispered against the side of your head, “i know how uncomfortable this may be for you.”
“not uncomfortable,” you responded, your head now resting against his shoulder, and that was the truth. you weren’t uncomfortable, “this is just different.”
he nodded, his gaze lingering on theo’s hand as he watched his knuckles turn white around a glass. “somebodies getting angry,” enzo chuckled. theo never contemplated anything when it came to you, must be the italian in him well, except maybe when it came to confessing his feelings. you watched as he began to walk toward the two of you. “prepare yourself, love.” enzo then warned.
“lorenzo,” theodore smiled, a forced smile, one that laid heavy on his chest. “how about you come on a walk with me, yeah? i want to speak with you privately.”
his eyes found yours—they were heavy and disappointed. your heart sank further, but you only held onto lorenzo a little tighter.
“woah, heyyy, what’s going on here?” matteo quickly intervened, gently patting theo on the back as he looked at you and lorenzo. “i didn’t know you two were a thing!” matteo sounded astonished, his mouth dropping as he chuckled. “theo, buddy, isn’t this wonderful news?”
the scowl on theodore’s face was apparent as he muttered, “considerati fortunata, puttana,” (consider yourself lucky, whore.) under his breath, but he quickly nodded. “yeah, such great and—wonderful news, mio amico.”
“you think?” lorenzo smirked, giving your waist a gentle squeeze before kissing your neck, cheekily staring at theodore as your hand entangled into his brunette hair.
theodore’s eyes darkened as he sipped his alcohol, an angry noise bubbling from his throat. “yep.” he bit, “it’s fucking wonderful.”
“now that’s good sportsmanship.” matteo rubbed theo’s back before continuing. “hey! i have an idea. why don’t we go dancing? how does that sound, lovebirds!”
you slid off lorenzo’s lap and he was quick to follow suite, his arm sliding around your hipbone, pressing your back against his chest. he had to be strongly willed because the way theodore’s gaze burned through his skull wasn’t easy to ignore.
at least you couldn’t ignore it.
it made you sick to your stomach.
theo set his glass on the table. “you do that—i’m going for a smoke.”
9:30P.M.
theo didn’t go outside to smoke.
instead, he was leaned against a wall, a cigarette planted between his parted lips as his eyes stuck to yours like glue; watching you dance against lorenzo rather than him.
you decided not to make eye contact with theodore because if you did you’d end up stopping the plan right then and there.
“enzo,” you muttered, your gaze struggling to stay on the ground as his chin rested on your head, swaying to the music with his hands on your waist. “hmm?” he hummed.
“could you, um,” you stuttered, your eyes fluttering to theodore’s and immediately regretting it. “turn me around.”
he nodded, his gaze now facing theodore’s pained one as you wrapped your arms tighter around his neck to comfort yourself. in return, he gave you a squeeze. “i know how hard this is for you, love,” he whispered, “but trust me, it’s going to be worth it.”
“are you sure?” you asked, your mind beginning to race. “because he hasn’t done anything other than stare. i mean, who stares at the person they supposedly have a crush on as they dance with your best friend?…oh my merlin,” you muttered, reality hitting you. “i’m dancing with his best friend.”
you tried to back away but lorenzo’s grip tightened around you, “y/n.”
“i’m going to hell,” you continued. “this is it for me. i’m literally the worst person alive. hell. that’s my future. h. e. double hockey stic—“
enzo squeezed your hips, signaling that he’s about to kiss you. “now?!” you shouted in an angry whisper. lorenzo nodded, his eyes darting toward theodore’s again, watching as he began to make his way over.
“now.” he confirmed and your stomach backflipped.
a hand came to your cheek, lorenzo’s thumb covering your mouth as he kissed that rather than you; to the unassuming eye, the kiss was passionate, stomach hurling curling.
any girl would die to kiss lorenzo berkshire; slytherin’s number one heart throb.
just not you.
but boy did you put on a show.
theodore stopped in his tracks, his hand reaching forward as a communication indicator but falling back to his side in defeat. he turned back around.
good thing you didn’t see that because you would’ve chased after him, throwing your arms around his neck and kissing him passionately; not his fucking best friend.
10:30P.M.
you were comfortable dancing with lorenzo when theodore’s eyes weren’t burning through the two of you; laughing as his hands ghosted over your hips, dancing to the music as friends rather than ‘lovers’.
you almost forgot about the whole plan.
“thought that she… was with theo.” a slytherin you didn’t recognize commented.
“must be a pass around.” another smirked, and your heart sank even further.
you stepped away from lorenzo, emotions stirring as you made eye contact with the group talking about you.
their commentary came to an end as you watched matteo approach them in your peripheral vision. you didn’t hear much bickering after that, but regardless, your vision began to blur.
looking around, you noticed everyone staring at you, and you took another step back.
“hey— hey!” lorenzo was close to you again.
“what?” you bit. “this whole thing, this whole plan is stupid and i want to stop.”
“y/n.” he chuckled, looking around awkwardly, trying to place his arms around you waist but you smacked him hard in the chest, sending him slightly backward.
a small gasp tumbled from his parted lips.
you didn’t shout, but your voice graveled as you continued to walk into him. “i’m.” you hit him again. “not.” again. “doing.” again. “this.” and again. “anymore!”
but his arms stayed around you.
“i want to stop!” you were crying now, going limp against his chest as your throat burned. “please, please let me stop, enz… please.”
enzo drug a hand to your lower back, doing what he knew he needed to do. “don’t worry. i’ll go find pansy.” he whispered before kissing your temple.
10:45P.M.
“pans,” you cried, your mascara staining your cheeks as you burried yourself in her arms. “this was a mistake—i shouldn’t have agreed to their stupid plan.”
“hey,” she whispered, her fingers gently massaging your scalp. “we’ve all fallen for their antics before, don’t blame yourself too badly, honeybee.”
you shot her a look and she cocked her head, smiling empathetically, “not the time?”
“i’ll tell you what,” she whispered again, casting a small spell to rid the mascara from your cheeks before pulling your shoulders back to look you in the eye. “don’t leave. give it until midnight like planned, and if it goes wrong…” pansy took her phone out, a recording of both matteo and lorenzo stopping you earlier to explain the plan playing on screen.
she then smirked, “i’ll show him this.”
“when did you take that?” you asked, your fingers trailing down the length of the phone before looking at her skeptically; eyes still swollen.
her gaze shifted toward the ground, “let’s just say i was um… in on the whole thing…”
“don’t worry, though.” she says, brushing the final tear on your cheek away with the base of her thumb as she smiled. “they came to me so things wouldn’t get all fucked up… they care about you y/n, and they care about theodore, they don’t want to ruin this thing you have with him, okay?”
you nod, and she hugs you one last time before you have to go and find lorenzo.
11:00P.M.
“you seem tense, y/l/n,” draco found you before you found lorenzo.
his gaze drifted toward theodore, who was currently yelling at matteo—who was currently yelling at matteo. draco’s eye widened, astonished at the sight laid before him, “and i think i know why.”
“no, no, no, fuck!” you shouted, about to run toward them before the pair of hands you’d become so acquainted with today found your waist a-fucking-gain.
“do not.” enzo spat. “just be patient.”
draco raised his brows, clearly not even wanting to know as he silently left the scene.
“he’s going to kill him!” you shouted, struggling in his grasp, “let. me. GO.”
enzo rolled his eyes, “has anyone ever told you that you’re a stubborn little asshole?”
you paused for a moment. “hm, yes,” you nodded. now let me go.”
he held on tighter.
11:15P.M.
“no, no , no,” theodore’s fingers ran through his hair, “what is he doing to her, matteo? he shouldn’t be dancing with her like—like that! she’s a lady!”
theodore wasn’t yelling at matteo, his movements made it look as if he were upset, but he wasn’t. well… not at matteo at least.
matteo, being such a good friend, was letting theodore rant to him about how much he valued you and your friendship.
otherwise known as: matteo wanted to milk theo to his breaking point.
“dancing with her like what?” matteo asked, staring at you and lorenzo as he swayed and rocked his hips against yours. “seems to me like they’re having a little fun, if you know what i mean.” he winked playfully.
“jokester.” theodore drawled, pushing his shoulder. “i don’t like seeing her with him.”
matteo cocked his brow, “yeah and why’s that, buddy?” his head tilted to the side, “are you… jealous?”
theo looked astounded, immediately shaking his head in denial. “no, of course not.” he said, his cheeks turning a brighter shade of red as his anger grew palpable. “but she shouldn’t be here with that imbecille.”
“here we go again,” matteo rolled his eyes, groaning. “you never think anyone is right for her, dude. you have to give it a break.”
“a break,” theo threw his hand flat out in front of him, his forearm horizontal against his stomach. he drew it out, creating an invisible line. “she disserves someone that respects her, not a man like lorenzo.”
becoming harder to contain himself, matteo raised a brow at theo. "you mean deserves?” he grinned, continuing to drawl, “and who says he isn't the one for her?"
theo appeared as if he were on the verge of snapping. that caused matteo to chuckle, clasping his hands together as he grinned. “aw, what’s wrong, theo?” he playfully pouted, “you don’t like seeing them together? you poor, poor thing,” he puffed his lips. “guess you can’t do anything about it now.”
theo's eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched as he glared at matteo. "this isn’t right," he growled, his voice low and dangerous. "that boy is not good for her, and you know it."
matteo raised his hands in mock surrender, stepping back from theo. "whoa, whoa, calm down, buddy," he said, trying to lighten the mood. "i’m just messing with you. I know you care about her, but you can't control who she chooses to be with."
theo's gaze never left matteo, but he slowly relaxed his posture, his anger simmering down. "don’t mess with me right now, matteo," he warned, his voice still tense. "this is y/n we’re talking about; that boy will corrupt her!”
matteo shrugged, a smirk still playing on his lips. "maybe she likes the bad boys," he teased, gesturing toward you and lorenzo. "maybe she's into a little danger and excitement."
theo scoffed, muttering a curse under his breath. matteo raised an eyebrow, leaning closer to his friend, his tone becoming serious.
“you love her, buddy.” he said softly, his words filled with gentle understanding, “i know you do; trust me, i’ve seen the way you’ve looked at her since first year. just talk to her.”
the moment stretched thinly between them, theo's face twisting with an agonizing mix of emotions. things became tense, and both men glanced over to where you and lorenzo danced in the distance.
“i need a drink,” theo muttered.
11:30P.M.
“this sucks,” you groaned, looking at lorenzo only to find that his gaze is back on the brunette girl from earlier. you watched him, rolling your eyes before taking that chance to slip away.
music blared throughout the common room, it was upbeat and happy, but your focus drifted toward the window as you sat on the ledge.
you could feel the weather seeping through the glass, a gentle coldness caressing your cheeks as you took a deep breath in.
you sighed heavily, rubbing your temples with your fingertips, trying to clear your thoughts as you stared out into the misty night. winter breezes blew through the open windows, accompanied by the distant sounds of laughter resounding from behind you, but for some reason, you couldn't enjoy yourself.
a part of you longed to rejoin the festivities, while another wished for escape entirely. lost in thought, time seemed to blur until suddenly, draco’s voice startled you from your own thoughts.
"i wasn't aware the fireplace emitted such an enticing scent." he commented dryly, leaning casually against the window frame beside you. "or did you just need another excuse to avoid lorenzo back there?"
you repeated, "an excuse," you blew out a string of air, turning to look at draco with a raised eyebrow. "or maybe i just needed a break from the chaos."
draco smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. "chaos?" he echoed, leaning back against the window frame. "i thought you enjoyed these kinds of gatherings."
you shrugged, looking back out into the night. "sometimes," you admitted, "but not when i'm stuck in the middle of a bunch of drama."
draco's smirk faded slightly, his eyes narrowing as he studied you. "don’t be too hard on yourself, y/l/n," he said softly, his tone more serious now. "you're just trying to figure things out, like the rest of us."
you hesitated, biting your lip as you considered his words; words that you never thought you’d hear from him. "maybe," you murmured, glancing back at him. "but it's hard when everyone else seems to have it all figured out."
draco's gaze softened, and he reached out to gently take your hand in his. "we all have our moments, y/n," hemumbled. "don't fall through to others. just focus on what makes you happy."
his eyes flicked toward the party, a hint of sympathy in his gaze. "trust me, even the most confident among us struggle on occasion. and that includes myself." he added, smirk reappearing briefly.
you sighed, examining his hand holding yours, his grip firm yet comforting.
"it's hard to believe sometimes," your fingers curled around his, returning the pressure. "everything's getting complicated."
"maybe," draco mused, "and that's alright. life would be boring without consequences and complications." he smiled, a rare glimpse of vulnerability in his eyes.
for the first time, you felt a pang of pity for him- not because he was malfoy, but because he was human.
draco’s eyes drew over yours, then they glanced toward theodore who was cocking his head in your direction. the boy seemed to follow you everywhere, not letting you get too far when anyone approached you.
“i better get out of here before your real boyfriend starts to think i want any trouble,” draco chuckled.
you looked up at him, "what?" he waved, his brows angled in an amused position as he grinned. "i'll see you later," he chuckled.
you hesitated, your gaze flickering between draco and theo, who was still watching you from afar. you couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for this whole evening.
"yeah, see you later," you murmured, pulling your hand away from draco's and standing up.
draco nodded, his smirk never wavering. "don't let theo get too jealous now," he teased before turning and disappearing back into the party.
you watched draco walk away, a mix of amusement and confusion playing on your face. you couldn't help but feel a little flustered by his teasing, but you also couldn't deny that he had a point.
11:45P.M.
you looked up at the clock, contemplating on whether or not to just go back to your dorm. you were tired of pretending, and it wasn’t like enzo was coming back to you anytime soon. he had that girl pressed against the wall, his lips violently sucking the sweet spot under her jaw, her legs wrapped around his waist.
“fifteen minutes til new years,” an overhead announced, “head outside for the firework show, or don’t, whatever!”
their voice was cocky, but it caused you to finally crack a smile as you headed toward the door. you weren’t going to mope, but you also weren’t going to bother your friends who were clearly busy with their lovers or one-night stands.
the music was still loud outside, blaring messages from her by sabrina claudio through the speakers as you stood by a fountain.
sitting on the ledge, you watched the water, the stillness of it causing you to relax.
somewhere behind you, you heard footsteps crunching on gravel and snow. slowly, you turned to see theodore walking toward you hunched down into his coat.
his eyes met yours and a sympathetic look crossed his features. "i couldn't stay away," he whispered, further approaching until he was sitting on the ledge next to you.
though it pained you, you smiled at him, wanting to say a million things but you voice falling flat as he shifted around nervously.
“you must be freezing,” he then commented, pretending to just now notice your spaghetti strapped dress as he slid out of his jacket, shrugging it off his shoulders and carefully draping it over yours.
"thank you, theo." you murmured, wrapping the familiar fabric of his jacket around you, the scent of him clinging to it.
theo glanced away, his jaw tightening before he spoke again, seeming to collect his thoughts.
"happy new year, soffio," he said cautiously, focusing his attention back on the fountain.
you mirrored his gaze, feeling a tear pool in your eye. your throat burned as you swallowed. "happy new year," you whispered back, hesitating before tentatively reaching out to grasp his hand.
theo's features softened, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. "is it true," he asked quietly, casting a quick glance your way, then looking back sharp to the water.
your breathing hitched, swallowing the lump in your throat. "is what true, theo," you whispered, fixing your gaze on his profile.
“you and lorenzo,” he replied, the sentence like poison on his tongue.
you held back a small breath, shaking your head vigorously. "no," you managed after a heavy exhale.
"then why did you leave me to be with him earlier?" theo questioned stiffly, his own whisper evaporating in the chilled air. you closed your eyes, letting out a shaky sigh.
his grip on your hand tightened, though you didn't pull away.
"it's not like that," you mumbled, struggling with your emotions. "it’s complicated..."
your voice trailed off, uncertainty clouding your judgement.
“so tell me, y/n!” theodore’s voice rose, now holding both of your hands, turning you to look him in the eye. “devi dirmelo. (you have to tell me) i can’t take it— i need you to tell me what’s going on between you and lorenzo. is- is he or is he not your lover?”
you watched his eyes plead with you, the desperation washing away some of your fear and anxiety. “it wasn’t real,” you stammered, your voice just as loud. “none of it; the kiss, the dancing, the whole relationship.”
you took a deep breath, steadying yourself for the conversation that was about to unfold. "okay?” you shakily muttered, meeting his gaze. "that whole thing was to get us together."
theo's eyes widened, his grip on your hands loosening slightly. "what?" he whispered, clearly taken aback by your confession.
you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. "i know it sounds crazy, but i wanted to be with you, theo. they told me this would make you ask me out—” you cringed at your sentence, “if you don’t believe me pansy has the whole video."
your voice trembled, and you could feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. "i'm sorry, i never meant to hurt you."
theo stared at you for a long moment, his expression a mix of shock, confusion, and hurt. "why would you do that, soffio?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, “make me jealous so i’d get with you? bella…”
your eyes welled up with unshed tears, your voice catching as you spoke. "i was scared," you admitted. "scared that you wouldn't see me the same way, scared to ruin our friendship... scared that you wouldn't-"
a sob echoed from your chest, causing you to falter.
"sorry, i'm so sorry, " you breathed, burying your face into his shoulder.
as the realization washed over theodore's face, his embrace around you tightened. "va tutto bene," (it’s okay) he whispered, a catch in his voice as he stroked your hair repeatedly. "soffio, i have loved you for so long. i despised seeing you with him tonight.”
you pulled back slightly, your eyes searching his face for truth. "you... you love me?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
theo nodded, his eyes filled with sincerity. "always, bella, but i never thought you saw me the same way."
you bit your lip, a small smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. "i'm sorry, theo," you murmured, leaning back into his embrace. "i should have told you sooner."
"it's okay," he reassured you, his arms tightening around you. "we can start fresh now. no more games, no more pretending."
you nodded, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. "i'd like that," you whispered, your eyes closing as you rested your head on his shoulder.
the countdown to midnight began over the speakers, the music dying down as people waited for the new year. “come here,” he whispered, a hand placed on your waist, positioning you to straddle his lap as he rested both palms on your hips.
you hesitated for a moment, but then slowly shifted your weight, wrapping your legs around him as he guided you.
“tell me you want this, bella,” he whispered, one palm gently squeezing your hip as the other came to caress your cheek.
with a subtle smile, you leaned in toward him, whispering into his ear. "i want this, theo," you confirmed.
his adam's apple bobbed, his thumbs tracing lazy circles on your lower lip. you closed your eyes, feeling his breath tickling against your skin. there was anticipation on his expression, almost palpable.
as the countdown reached zero, the music swelled, and fireworks exploded in the sky, theo’s palms guided your face in anticipation, tasting you the way he’d dreamed of for years as his lips danced softly, gracefully against yours.
you shivered against him, relishing in the warmth of his embrace as your happiness leaked into every corner of your being.
this moment was different, liberating. his touch, intimate, and sincere.
“bella,” he whispered sweetly, resting his forehead against yours, “don’t you try and win my affection again, understood? it’s yours; it always will be yours.”
you laughed, kissing the tip of his nose as you closed your eyes, “okay, okay. i got it.”
his laughter grew with yours, his head falling to your neck as he softly kissed the delicate skin under your ear, “happy new year, soffio.” he then whispered, twirling a strand of your hair around his finger.
“happy new year, theo.”
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f1goat ¡ 5 months ago
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roommates ; lando norris + part six
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In which you have to live with your brothers best friend who you really don't like, Lando Norris, and his many 'girlfriends' for a while, but there's always a thin line between love and hate.
masterlist - playlist
lando norris x fem!verstappen reader tw: smut & not proofread
You don’t know whether to laugh or to cry when you hear the girl talking to Lando. He’s barely responding to her, but still. It’s so clear to you. Lando doesn’t care about you. That silly crush of yours? You need to get rid of it. How faster, how better. When they walk inside the living room, it doesn’t take longer then a second for Lando to see you sitting on the couch. 
While Lando is busy staring at you and thinking about what to say, you can’t stop looking at the girl he bought home with him. Is it bad that she kinda reminds you of yourself? She’s wearing the same sort of dress you were wearing on your ��date’ with your ex. Her hair is the same color and about as long as yours. It must be a coincidence. 
Lando feels so ashamed right now. The night he goes for the most pathetic way, is the night you see it happen. Fucking hell. He hasn’t drunk enough to handle with this. When he saw Emily earlier at the club, at least if he got her name right, he could only see the dress she’s wearing. Exactly like yours from earlier. Then he saw how she had some other things that reminded him of you. It felt like the only solution for tonight. 
“Uh,” Emily clearly feels the tension between Lando and you. “She’s not your girlfriend right?” She asks awkwardly. 
“No,” you quickly reply. 
Lando doesn’t even know what to say. He can only feel ashamed right now. Fuck. You keep looking at Emily and him. He knows that you see it as well, it’s not hard to miss that Emily looks like you. This is embarrassing. It feels even more embarrassing that she’s a cheap knockoff compared to you. He lets out an annoyed sigh. Fuck, he really fucked things up with this. 
Now that he thinks about it, he wonders why he even brought the girl home with him. How longer he looks at her, how less she reminds him of you. Tonight was about proving that you’re wrong, not about proving the other way around. Why did he even bring her with him? It’s desperate, really.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” you softly say while standing up from the couch. Is it that bad that you’re disappointed in this? You feel like some sort of fool. Why did you even wait up? Why did you want to know about this? You feel yourself getting more sad with the second. Slowly you walk away. When you walk past Lando, he’s quick to grab your shoulder. It makes you even more sad. 
“Don’t leave like this,” he softly says, “Let’s talk.”
You feel the anger running through your veins right now. You aren’t thinking about what you’re saying right now. “I don’t think your girlfriend is here to talk,” you sneer to him, “and neither am I. Not anymore at least.”
“Let me explain,” Lando pleas with a soft voice.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” you state, “We’re nothing. It’s not like we’re friends or anything. You lied to me before, I don’t trust you anymore. We’re even less then nothing now.”
“Don’t act like this,” Lando replies. You see the pain in his eyes, but for now you don’t care about that. He did this to himself. He’s the one who bought her home, not you. If it’s up to you he feels all kind of pain right now, he deserves it. 
“Don’t act like what?” You ask annoyed, “Can’t I tell you that we’re not friends, or anything else? Or can’t I tell you that I don’t care about you? You do you Lando. I really don’t give a fuck. So go have sex with your new girlfriend over here.”
“Shut up,” Lando groans. 
“Or what?” You reply angrily. 
“Don’t say things you don’t mean,” Lando continues. 
“I mean every word of what I just said,” you lie. Of course you don’t mean anything about it. You thought that Lando and you were finally becoming friendly with each other, you even hoped for more. Fuck this is really bad. It even pains you to say those words to him, but you don’t feel like you have another choice. 
“Stop lying,” Lando says with a louder voice this time. He almost seems angry this time. The frustration is obvious. 
“I don’t care Lando. Do whatever you want, go fuck with her or another girl. I really don’t care about it,” you tell him with the same frustration, “just make sure that you’re not moaning out my name again.” 
“Shut up,” Lando groans. The angry undertone in his voice is getting more clear now. You match it.
“Make me,” you reply angrily. 
You’re painfully aware about how close Lando and you are standing towards each other. He isn’t holding your shoulder anymore, but you feel every breath of him on your face. At this moment you want nothing more then for Lando to snap. It feels like you’re pretty close to make that happen. You wonder what will happen next. Will he scream at you? Or would he shut you up another way? Some way you prefer?
Lando takes a step closer towards you. His nose is almost pressed against yours. The space between to two of you gets only smaller. You wonder if you need to say something else, but then Lando continues to talk. 
“You want me to shut you up?” He asks you. His voice isn’t angry anymore, it doesn’t even seems frustrated anymore. It’s almost scarily calm for what’s happening. You notice how Lando doesn’t look away from you. The girl he bought home with him is still here, but it seems like Lando has forgotten about her. Not that you mind. Why hasn’t she left yet anyway?
“Yes,” you state boldly. 
Lando doesn’t think about the possible outcomes of his next movement. He stops thinking about everything he wants to do right now and for once just does something. Still annoyed and frustrated with the whole evening - and mostly with himself, he finally snaps. He grabs your waist, and pulls you almost into himself. Before you can react he lifts up your chin with a soft, but forceful movement. He gives you one last look in the eyes before closing his own eyes and slamming his lips against yours. 
You didn’t expect him to do this. Fuck, you really didn’t. But it’s insane how good it feels. Lando his lips are soft, even softer then you thought they would be. His kiss reflects the way he’s feeling, it’s messy but it does fit the moment. You can probably kiss him like this for the rest of the night.  And many nights more. If he would let you. Maybe it isn’t Lando who doesn’t support that idea, it’s the girl from earlier who distracts you from each other. 
“What the fuck!” She loudly screams. “Why did you even bring me here?” She continues to ask, “This is fucking insane.” 
“Just leave,” Lando sighs annoyed. He doesn’t move away from you in the mean time. You’re still trapped in his arms. Without saying a word, but with a small grin plastered on your face, you watch everything amused. It seems like she doesn’t want to leave like this. The girl is still fuming and making all kind of remarks at Lando. While he only tries to get her to leave. 
Eventually Lando needs to let go of you to walk her outside. You still hear her screaming in the hallway. It makes you giggle. Of course, it’s bad that Lando treated her like this - but for once, you’re glad about it. It would be way worse if he fucked her. You hear the front door close, after that there’s a peaceful silence. No more screams from the girl. No more arguments between Lando and you. 
When Lando returns to you, he’s busy thinking about what to do next. Should he continue with what he was doing? Or should he apologize? He has no idea what you think about all of this. What if he kissed you without you agreeing with it? When he sees you leaning on the wall and waiting for him with a small, but really satisfied grin plastered on your face, Lando is quick to forget about all his worries. He rushes himself back to you, only to press his lips on yours for the second time that night. 
“You drive me fucking crazy,” he grunts after pulling back.
“Says you,” you reply softly.
Lando doesn’t reply verbally this time. He softly pins you against the wall and presses his lips against yours for the third time tonight. Now that he knows how it feels to kiss with you, he never wants to stop with it. He can’t miss this feeling. 
You can safely state that you have never been kissed better then this. It’s not like you want to give yourself hope, but Lando kisses you like there’s no-one else he ever wants to kiss again. You can only hope that it actually is that way. Mainly because you’re sure that you never want to kiss anyone else again if it isn’t Lando. 
“Fuck Lan,” you softly whimper when he pulls back again. 
He looks at you. The way he stares at you makes you shiver. His eyes pierce through yours. “What babygirl?” Lando asks you. He’s afraid that you have come to your senses, that he should stop this. You probably don’t want this, he guesses. 
“Don’t stop,” you softly tell him with red cheeks. 
“Sorry, I’ll stop,” Lando mutters a bit disappointed. You show him a confused look, didn’t he hear you? You don’t even know why he’s thinking about stopping. The only good thing about him mishearing you, is that he seems disappointed to stop. That’s interesting. 
“I said don’t stop,” you tell him a bit louder this time. 
This time it’s Lando who shows you a confused look. He has no idea what’s happening to him. Before he can even ask if you’re sure, you already surprise him again. This time it’s you who pulls him closer towards yourself. Lando doesn’t even know what’s happening anymore. It seems like you do want this as well? He thought you lost yourself in the moment, but now he’s not so sure about that anymore. 
He can’t help himself anymore now. His tongue is inside your mouth and battling yours for dominance. Lando can’t hold himself back. If this is the only night he’ll experience this, he needs to experience as much of you as he can. When you let out a soft moan during making out with Lando, it only arouses him more. He feels his pants tighten around a particular spot. Softly he pins you against the wall again. He removes his lips from yours, only to connect them with your neck. 
It makes you let out a soft moan. How is Lando making you feel like this in only a matter of time? You must be losing your mind. Your focus is quick to disappear when Lando his hands start to explore your body as well. His hands are everywhere, at least that’s how it feels like. 
“Let me make it up to you,” he eventually tells you. 
“Make it up to me?” You ask confused. What’s he talking about. 
“For bringing her home,” Lando confesses, “I really shouldn’t have done that.”
Slowly you nod. “That’s a lot to make up for,” you softly say. 
Lando nods as well. “Thank god we have a lot of time,” he jokes. You show him a small grin. That’s enough confirmation for him right now. Within seconds he picks you up. You’re surprised about his strength. He’s actually walking you to his room like this. When you reach his bedroom, Lando softly drops you onto his bed. He joins you on the bed, hovering above you while pressing kisses on your cheeks, forehead, nose and every other spot he can find to press his lips against. 
It takes you a lot to withhold yourself from letting out loud moans whenever Lando does something. When Lando kisses you against your neck and softly sucks on a small bit of your skin, you can’t hold them back anymore. You let out a loud moan. 
“Lan,” you softly whimper.
“You better keep calling me that,” Lando softly tells you. You show him a small smile. He let himself down on the bed next to you. You’re quick to move yourself closer towards Lando. Within a couple seconds you have yourself pressed up against him again. Lando looks at you full lust. “Needy babygirl?” Lando asks you. 
You can only nod. You feel your cheeks redden up. It almost feels embarrassing, but you really can’t stop feeling like this right now. The things Lando is doing to you, while almost doing nothing to you, are actually insane. Lando moves himself again. This time he positions himself sitting right next to you. Softly he pulls you up as well. He toys with the hem of your sweater, looking at you with questioning eyes while doing so. You show him a small nod, hoping that he understands the hint. He does. Slowly Lando pulls off your sweater. 
When he sees that you’re wearing nothing underneath your sweater, he softly gasps. “Fuck babygirl,” he mutters while looking at your boobs. He notices the way your nipples have hardened, he wants nothing more then to put them into his mouth. For now he withholds himself from actually doing so. He does however move his attention towards your leggings. Suddenly he can’t think about anything else then seeing you naked. 
It’s you who is quick to discard the leggings you were wearing. Lando can’t believe his eyes when you start to pull of the leggings. When the leggings have joined your sweater on the floor, Lando can’t stop staring at you anymore. Softly he lets his hands wander over your body, stopping by your string. After this there’s no way back. Not that he can trust himself to stop now, but after seeing you completely naked he’s sure that he can’t stop anymore. 
You let out a soft moan when Lando traces your string with his fingers. “Take it off please,” you beg Lando. 
“Sure babygirl?” Lando asks you, “Because I don’t think I can stop myself anymore after seeing you naked.” He needs to know for sure that you want this as well. 
“Please,” you continue to beg, “Just take if off already.”
Lando doesn’t need to know anything else for now. He is quick to pull down your string. When he tosses it on the floor as well, he can’t tear his eyes of you. You’re beautiful. Words are leaving his mouth rather quickly, he can’t even think about what he’s saying anymore. 
“You look so beautiful,” he murmurs. You show him a small smile. “Imagined this for years,” he grunts, “You look even better then in my dreams.” Is Lando confessing that he dreamt about you? What’s going on? “Can I touch you?” Lando suddenly asks you, you’re quick to stammer out a yes. 
Lando is quick to come into action after hearing your yes. Suddenly he’s everywhere at once. You feel him exploring your naked body. His lips are pressing kisses on your neck, but he’s fast to move down lower. Eventually he reaches your boobs. He sends you one more asking look to know you’re sure about this, which you are quick to confirm to. After that Lando closes his lips around one of your nipples, while softly kneading your other tit. It causes you to let out a loud moan, something that Lando seems to like. 
Everything is getting to much for you rather quickly. It’s been a while since the last time you’ve had sex and with a thin walled room next to Lando, masturbating wasn’t one of your options lately. The way Lando discovers your body is making you lose your mind. You need to feel him as well. You start to toy with the hem of his shirt, trying to make clear to him that he should take it off. Lando doesn’t budge. 
When Lando moves down on your body again and presses kisses against your lower stomach, you’re sure that you’ll be losing your mind. When one of his kisses is almost pressed against your cunt, you almost let out a scream. Fuck it’s actually insane how much you need him to do something to you. Who would have thought that Lando is the one who can make you feel like this? Now that you think of it, you’re not that surprised. 
“Ohh Lan,” you softly moan out when Lando gets even closer towards your more private parts. Lando lets out a low groan. “I need to taste you,” Lando grunts. 
“Please do,” you moan. 
That’s all Lando needed to hear. He dresses himself down in no time. His shirt and pants join your clothes on the bedroom floor. Then he spread your legs for himself. “Such a pretty cunt,” Lando softly mutters while looking at you. He really can’t believe that this is happening. 
“Do something,” you softly beg. 
Lando doesn’t wait any longer anymore. He presses kisses against your cunt in a taunting slow pace. It makes you crazy. “More,” you whimper. Lando listens to you. Like some sort of madman he starts to lick your pussy. His tongue is everywhere at once. You don’t even try to hold back your moans anymore. They are leaving your mouth again and again. It seems that Lando likes it as well. 
“You’re making such pretty sounds for me,” Lando tells you adoringly. It gives you a warm feeling on the inside. You’re probably red already, but otherwise you’d be sure that this would be the reason. “Such a good girl,” Lando continues to praise you. 
Lando slowly lets one of his fingers slide inside of you. Moving it in a rather fast pace while connecting his lips to your clit. Softly he sucks it inside of his mouth. When he releases, you let out a loud moan again. You feel your orgasm getting closer. 
“Fuck me,” you try to order Lando. 
Lando stops his movements. “Fuck you?” He asks you confused.
“I need to feel you inside me,” you confess. 
“What about asking nicely?” Lando asks you teasingly. He always thought you’d be a bit of a brat and it turns out that he’s right. However, what he didn’t expect was how easily it would be to turn you into a begging mess.
“Please Lan,” you beg him without even thinking about it. “Please let me feel you fill me up,” you continue, “Please fuck me.” Begs are leaving your lips like prayers. Lando has never felt so aroused in his life before. He always thought it would be different with you, more intense for sure, but he didn’t expect it to be this much better with you. He’s still wearing his boxers, but he has never felt this close to an orgasm before. You’re making him lose his mind. 
Lando already knows that when he has felt you around his cock for the first time, there’s no one else who would ever feel better around it anymore. He knows for a fact that when he fucks you, he ruins sex for himself for the rest of his life. But still, that doesn’t stop him from pulling down his boxershorts and letting his cock spring to freedom. 
You’re greedily grabbing his boner, needing to feel it in your hands before he puts it inside you. Slowly you stroke his dick, Lando lets out a loud moan. It feels good to pull a sound like this out of him. You want to hear every sound you can get out of him. 
“Princess,” Lando grunts, “You have to stop doing that, otherwise I’ll cum before even fucking you.” 
“Then what are you waiting for?” You ask Lando. Fuck, you feel like a brat but you can’t stop yourself. You never felt like this before. No one ever made you feel like this. Lando can only grin when he hears your remark. 
“Always thought you would be a brat,” he tells you with a dangerously low voice. It makes you even more turned on. “Sorry,” you whimper.
“Never apologize for that babygirl,” Lando is quick to reassure you, “I always liked the thought.” Before you can react again, Lando continues to talk. “And I always liked the thought of you being my brat even more,” he confesses. You don’t know what to say. At this moment you don’t have to say anything, Lando comes closer towards you and starts to line up his cock with your entrance. 
“You still want this?” Lando asks you.
“Please,” you beg.
That’s all Lando needed to hear. He pushes himself inside of you. Within seconds he’s setting a ungodly pace. You can’t even think straight anymore right now. The only thing that’s in your mind is how good Lando is fucking you. Sex never felt like this before. You wonder if anyone else will ever make it feels like this. You don’t think so. Lando is probably ruining you. And you would let him do it again every time he wants to. 
“Fuck,” you whimper when you feel your orgasm reaching again. Lando makes all kind of sounds in the mean time. You love every single one of them. Every small or big grunt, moan and groan makes you even more aroused. 
“You feel fucking perfect,” Lando groans. He increases his pace even more. “I’m so fucking close,” he adds almost ashamed. 
“Me too,” you confess.
Lando didn’t lie about how close he already was. He feels himself almost crashing down because of his upcoming orgasm. He tries to fuck you as hard as he can manage, pushing and pulling in and out of you with a rapid pace. “Fuck,” you almost scream when Lando keeps increasing his pace. “I’m coming,” you tell Lando pretty quickly after that.
You feel the orgasm washing over you. It’s never been as intense as now. Lando tries to pull himself back, remembering for the first time that he didn’t use any kind of protection. Your legs are firmly wrapped on his body, you’re not letting him go. 
“Pill,” you softly explain. Lando nods and pushes himself deeper back into you. He feels his load coming out of him and entering you. 
“Fucking hell babygirl,” Lando grunts a couple minutes later when he feels more relaxed again. His orgasm has left his body. He feels calm again. “That was,” Lando starts a sentence he doesn’t know how to finish. It was so many things, mind-blowing, the best sex of his life and he can go on like this. 
“A mistake,” you finish his sentence. You already feel sad about the words you just said, but you know that it’s for the better to call it a mistake. “This can’t happen again,” you sigh. 
Lando doesn’t know what to think right now. “A mistake?” He asks you confused, “Was it that bad?”
“No,” you’re quick to deny, “I think, no I know that this was the best sex I’ve ever had. But we can’t do this again Lando, I’m not the one for one night stands.”
“I never called this an one night stand,” Lando is quick to tell you. “Let’s talk tomorrow about this babygirl. I want to sleep and I want you next to me.” 
It’s probably the most stupid thing you can do, but you agree to Lando his wishes. You let yourself fall asleep next to Lando. He cuddles up against you and does the exact same thing, but not before wondering how he’s going to make sure that this will happen again. 
part seven
a/n; finaaaaally some tension :) there's more to come! hope everyone likes it <3
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maya1525 ¡ 1 year ago
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You’re Ours
18+ MDNI
Pairing✩࿐Fem!Reader X Megumi Fushiguro, Yuuta Okkotsu & Toge Inumaki
WARNINGS✩࿐IF YOU ARE NOT A FAN OF MONSTER STUFF SKIP group sex, monster stuff, overstimulation, cock-warming, praise, Fem! Receiving oral, anal, vaginal sex, refusal to cum, cream pie, cursed technique usage during sex - shikigami giving oral and cursed speech usage
BONUS✩࿐Jealous Megumi and little bit of aftercare
Word count✩࿐2.5k
Summary✩࿐Female reader is in a relationship with Megumi Fushiguro, Yuuta Okkotsu and Toge Inumaki. The school had changed the living situation to a roommate set up and the reader got paired with those three. It’s jealous Megumi Fushiguro’s turn to have sex with the reader, but Toge and Yuuta come across them unexpectedly.
A/N✩࿐This is my first post and I finally had time to go back and make some edits to it. I hope you enjoy the new version of it!
“I saw how you were flirting with Yuuta and Toge during practice today, did you think that would go unnoticed?” Megumi said as he stalked up to the couch with a scowl on his handsome features, he threw his bag onto the floor aggressively. You had just got home to your shared apartment about ten minutes ago and simply wanted to watch TV after a long day of school.
“Why would you let that bother you? You know it’s your turn to have me tonight-“ he broke the distance between you two, and smashed his lips against yours with an angry kiss.
“I know it’s my turn, but I can’t help but feel annoyed. I want you focused on me, when it’s my day- not them.” He growled as his larger body engulfed you into the couch. His hands frantically removed your school uniform from you, and within seconds you were naked and underneath him.
When it came to lovemaking, Megumi was typically thoughtful and cautious. He made sure you were fully prepared for him to enter. But today was different, he was harsh and forceful. You couldn’t help but get fired up by his jealousy. His kisses were hotter than usual, and his hands caressed you with so much want.
He positioned you on his lap so you were facing away from him, and he left angry love bites on your shoulders in the process. With each painful bite he marked on your skin, your whole body would shiver from his hot mouth.
“That’s it.” Megumi hissed into your ear as he slowly set you down on his raging hard dick instead. You anticipated for him to shove his engorged dick inside of your slick pussy. Instead, you felt him stretch your ass out and a pain-filled moan left your lips. His left arm snaked its way around your slender waist while his right hand teased your nipples, causing faint sparks of pleasure through the pain.
“Y-you’re too big, it hurts.” You whimpered pathetically, as you dug my nails into his muscular thighs, doing nothing to deter him. You felt him lower you down onto him even further, now he filled you.
“Megumi I’m sorry.” You cried, feeling tears prick up in the corners of your eyes. This was the first time he’s taken you so roughly. You had no idea he could get so jealous. You felt him aggressively bite down on the crook of your shoulder. He sucked hard, clearly marking you as his; knowing that Toge and Yuuta will see it later.
Megumi let out a muffled groan as he relished in your tight and comfortable ass. “I think I’m going to keep you like this so when they come home they’ll know who you belong to.”
“Megumi, just fuck me already.” You whined, knowing it would feel better with friction.
“Not yet,” he then spread your thighs apart even further, opening up your pussy he refused to give attention to. “I think you need to suffer a little bit more.” He then brought both of his hands together, “Devine Dog: Totality.” Just then his large black and white shikigami appeared. The massive monster sat down looking at Fushiguro waiting for his orders.
“Megumi what are you-“ he patted his right hand onto your pussy. “Totality, eat.” The black and white creature brought his face between your thighs. You instinctively tried to shut them but Fushiguro’s quick reflexes and strength forced them open. The more you tried to close your legs the more painful Megumi’s hands felt. You tried to squirm away but the ache of Fushiguro’s rod shot up your ass when you moved. You felt his shikigami’s whiskers tickle your thigh's sensitive skin as his broad face came closer to your most private area.
“Megumi, this is inappropriate - ahh...” A shameful moan came from your lips at the sudden hot and wet sensation of the beast's tongue. He licked up your pussy, immediately coming in contact with your clit deliciously.
“Oh?” You heard Megumi say in an amused tone as he began to kiss and suck on your neck, causing intense shivers.
Totality kept in a steady rhythm as his tongue continuously slid up your pussy. You felt disgusted for immediately enjoying this, and your cunt began to moisten uncontrollably. The wet sound of your dripping hole and the monster’s sloppy tongue echoed in the quiet living room. Totality burrowed his face further between your legs as his long hot tongue plunged deep into your folds.
“M-mmh” You moaned out shamelessly, enjoying the combination of his swiveling tongue inside you and his wet nose rubbing against your clit. His ears twitched as his tongue pumped in and out of you effortlessly. He drank up your cunt that leaked profusely, like a broken faucet. The feeling of Megumi’s unmoving dick clogging your ass didn’t feel as bad as it did. The beast's tongue then flicked up inside of you, coming in contact with your sensitive spot. You whimpered uncontrollably and you felt your ass clench around Fushiguro’s rod with delight. White hot pleasure engulfed your body as the monster’s long pumping tongue continued to prod the same place. You could feel your release building up, and any second now it’ll hit you like a tsunami wave.
“Release.” Megumi’s voice rang out and suddenly all the intense pleasure in your dripping pussy disappeared. Totality vanished right before your eyes. “Did you think I was going to make you cum that easily,” Megumi whispered lowly in your left ear.
Tears of frustration spilled down your cheeks, “Megumi fuck me already...” You cried, trying to bounce on his dick but he snaked both of his arms around your petite waist to hold you still.
Suddenly, the front door opened and there stood a very shocked Toge and Yuuta. You weren’t expecting them to come home this early, since they usually go on a run this time of the week. The way your sectional couch was set up, gave them a perfect view of the whole scene. Especially a more than perfect view of your neglected and glistening pussy.
“Toge, Y-Yuuta, help me. Megumi is being mean!” You whimpered out desperately. Toge’s gaze hardened when he looked at Megumi who sat smugly behind you, you felt his dick twitch inside of you pleasurably.
“Okaka,” Toge growled sternly.
“I didn’t know refusing to make her cum would be such a crime.” Megumi snarked as he lowered his mouth to your bruised-up neck. Knowing that his possessive love bites would stay marked on your skin for a while.
Yuuta blushed while he stood there looking at your naked body. He’s seen you naked a handful of times before, but he still couldn’t get over the fact of how beautiful you look. Especially like this, all horny and desperate. Okkotsu mustered up the courage to glare at Megumi, “Fushiguro you shouldn’t be teasing her like that.” He gritted through his teeth.
“Help me...” You whined, your body craved relief, especially from your boyfriends.
“Did you forget it’s my day to have you?” Megumi hissed against your neck possessively.
“That doesn’t matter.” Yuuta said taking a step closer to you, “Did you forget that Y/n is our girlfriend too? And when she needs something, a respectful boyfriend would see to her needs being met.”
“Shake-shake.” Toge chimed in as he stepped forward removing his shirt swiftly. Your eyes lit up with hope, you tried to get up and off Megumi’s lap, but his iron grip didn’t falter. Toge knew how furious Megumi would get if he took you away from him, so he came up with a compromise. “Megumi lay down.” He ordered with cursed speech, immediately Megumi pulled you into his chest and laid back into the couch cushions with his hard dick still inside of you.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Megumi spat with annoyance.
Toge eyed the darker-haired male coolly as he removed his shorts. Yuuta followed closely behind and quickly undressed. Toge stood at the edge of the couch close to my face, “Take me in your mouth love.” He said in a soft tone, cursed speech still rang through and you immediately reached up to pull his boxers down. His semi-hard dick flew out and into your greedy mouth. You swiveled your tongue around him hungrily, and your heart melted when you heard a small groan of satisfaction come from his lips. You loved the way his beautiful purple eyes looked down at you in pleasure as your mouth did sinful things to him. His dick grew into your mouth and down your throat, causing you to gag at his size.
The weight of the couch went down between your legs, Yuuta had settled between them. He eyed you sweetly, “Don’t worry Y/n I’ll make you feel so good.” He cooed as he lowered his long hard dick toward your dripping cunt. He gently pushed the tip in and slowly made his way in, inch by inch.
“Mmh, you’re so wet dear.” He whimpered as he filled you up completely. You could feel his and Megumi’s cock rub against each other inside you. You’ve never felt so stuffed before, you couldn’t help but moan onto Toge’s pulsing dick in your mouth, causing his eyes to flutter shut at the feeling.
Yuuta tried his hardest not to cum instantly, you just felt so inviting to him. He slowly pulled out and then went back in, forming a steady rhythm. His hips smacked against your thighs causing clapping sounds to echo in the room. Okkotsu’s eyebrows narrowed as he concentrated on not cumming. He then brought slender fingers to your clit and gently rubbed and teased you, causing you to gasp in delight.
“Megumi, copy Yuuta’s speed,” Toge ordered with a smirk, realizing Megumi was stubbornly not moving inside of you.
“Fuck you.” Megumi hissed, as he picked you up by your hips and pumped into you at the same tempo as Yuuta.
You let out a muffled moan of ecstasy at the feeling of both dicks moving inside of you. Toge pulled out of your mouth with lust-filled eyes, a line full of saliva connected your puffy lips to the tip of his red hot dick. You lowered your mouth to his balls and took them into your mouth gently. All while your body rocked harshly from Megumi and Yuuta drilling into you. You felt Toge’s precum drip down onto your face as you made love to his balls.
Yuuta’s pace began to increase in speed, he was slowly losing control and restraint. He was trying not to hurt you as he chased after his release. The faster he collided his body against yours, the more you began to moan uncontrollably. As Yuuta’s speed increased so did Megumi’s thrusts in your asshole, their dicks slid in and out of you effortlessly. All while they rubbed against each other through the thin membrane of skin that separated them.
“Mmh, Y/n...” Yuuta whimpered deliciously. You could get drunk off Okkotsu’s small moans and whimpers of pleasure. They sounded like music to your ears. Inumaki’s quiet gasps and groans would occasionally make their way known, as you slurped and deep-throated him. Megumi would groan and grunt softly from time to time at how amazing your ass took him. The feeling of his raging dick rubbing against Yuuta’s through your pussy drove him mad.
“You’re taking us so well darling,” Fushiguro growled in adoration. You always loved it when you’d get compliments from Megumi, especially in bed. You’ve grown addicted to his and Yuuta’s praises. You felt Fushiguro’s hands snake up to your nipples as he gently pulled and teased the sensitive buds. Yuuta groaned out in response to what his friend did to you.
You felt your pussy tighten around Yuuta, your release will be here soon. “That’s it babe, cum for us.” Okkotsu cooed gently, his fingers still glued to your clit as he angled his dick inside you. Your walls clamped down on his cock.
��Drench me in your cum Y/n, prove to us how much you love our dicks inside of you.” Groaned Megumi underneath you as he shoved his dick in your ass erratically. Inumaki eyed you with lust as you coaxed his rod back down your throat, enjoying the velvety feel of him.
Your body felt as if it was burning up, you’re so close. You whimpered loudly onto Toge’s throbbing cock, as waves of pleasure spread through your body. Your body fell limp as Yuuta and Megumi continued to fuck you through your release, your cunt still pulsating around Yuuta’s dick with white-hot ecstasy.
“Damn.” Yuuta gritted through his teeth as his thrusts became sloppy and frantic along with Megumi’s.
Yuuta gasped out for air as he released his load deep inside you. A few seconds after Megumi came abundantly inside your tight hole, his cum filled you up with copious strands. Toge gingerly ran his fingers through your hair as he pumped his hips against your face. You felt his body shudder in pleasure as a delicious moan left his lips, as he came down your throat. You tried your best to swallow every drop, but a few streams of his hot liquid ran down the sides of your mouth and your neck as he emptied himself. After a few moments of resting his dick in your mouth, he pulled out softly, as did Megumi and Yuuta.
Yuuta pulled his boxers back up and helped lift you off of Megumi. “Want me to help you get cleaned up?” He said sweetly as he wrapped you up in a throw blanket.
“That sounds good.” You said groggily, feeling Yuuta and Megumi’s cum drip down and escape from your used holes.
Toge used the edge of the blanket to wipe some of his cum off your face and leaned down to give you an affectionate hug and kiss. That was his way of thanking you and also reminding you how much he appreciated you. You breathed in his comforting scent with a lazy smile on your face.
You felt Megumi grab your hand from around Toge, “Y/n I’m sorry I got so jealous, I shouldn’t have taken my frustration out on you. I hope you can forgive me.” You looked over at Megumi who sat at the edge of the couch running his hand through his messy hair, his dark blue eyes pleaded up at you.
“Oh, Megumi.” You sighed, as you hopped on his lap. “It’s ok, I forgive you. If something is ever bothering you, just talk to me.” You placed a small kiss on his cheek. “And that goes for you two as well.” You smiled over at Yuuta and Toge, and they both nodded in unison.
Suddenly a loud crash came from the kitchen. You directed your attention to see Yuji Itadori standing there all flustered with an obvious tent in his athletic shorts. “Uh so how long has this been going on, and how do I sign up?”
Next
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syluslnd ¡ 19 days ago
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hello! ive been enjoying lots of ur fics >< can i request maybe sylus finding out in the middle of sexy times that the reader is a little ummm masochistic 🫢
when you tell sylus you want a little pain during sex
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The atmosphere in the room was hazy,soft shadows dancing along the walls as you found yourself lost in the sensation of Sylus's hands on your skin.
His touch was both familiar and electrifying and every kiss he pressed against your neck sent waves of pleasure through your body. The tension between you had built slowly throughout the evening but now, as he pinned you beneath him, your breath came out in shallow gasps, anticipation tightening in your chest.
Sylus's lips hovered just above yours, his dark eyes watching you closely. "You're so quiet tonight, kitten. Something on your mind?" His voice was a low murmur, teasing yet filled with that commanding tone you knew so well. His hand slid down your side, his fingers tracing the curve of your waist, making you squirm beneath him.
You bit your lip, feeling the heat rise to your face. There was something you'd been keeping to yourself, something that bubbled up whenever you were with him like this. But admitting it... that felt dangerous, even though you knew Sylus would never judge you.
His hand gripped your thigh, a firm but controlled pressure and you could barely contain the shiver that ran through you. The words fought to escape your lips, the confession you'd been holding back all this time. You closed your eyes, feeling your pulse race faster than the beat of your heart.
"I... I need to tell you something" you whispered, voice trembling slightly.
Sylus paused, his gaze narrowing slightly but there was a curious glint in his eyes.
"Hmm?" He leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear. "What is it, sweetie? You know you can tell me anything."
You swallowed hard, your fingers gripping the sheets beneath you as you tried to summon the courage to speak. "!... um..." You felt your cheeks burn, your body reacting to both the vulnerability and the arousal building inside you. "I think... I like it when it hurts a little."
There. You said it. The confession hung in the air between you, your heart hammering against your ribs as you waited for his response.
Sylus didn't move for a moment, his eyes locking onto yours, the smirk tugging at the corners of his lips slowly spreading wider.
"Oh?" His voice was low, dangerously soft.
"You like a little pain, kitten?" He leaned down, his mouth brushing against your ear as he whispered "I didn't realize you were such a masochist."
Your stomach twisted in nervous excitement as his words sank in. You nodded, feeling your breath quicken. "Yeah... just a little. I didn't know how to tell you before."
He chuckled softly, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes again. "You're full of surprises tonight." His hand trailed down your thigh, only this time, his grip tightened
-just enough to make you gasp softly, your body responding instinctively to the mix of pleasure and pain.
Sylus's eyes darkened with something deeper, a mixture of desire and control. "You should've told me sooner, kitten” he said, his voice taking on that possessive edge that always made your pulse race. "You think I wouldn't enjoy that?"
Before you could answer, he brought his lips to your neck, biting down gently at first, then harder, his teeth sinking in just enough to make you wince. The sensation shot through you, a sharp thrill mixing with the pleasure, and you couldn't hold back the soft moan that escaped your lips.
"Mmm, there it is” Sylus murmured against your skin, clearly pleased with your reaction.
"You like that, don't you?"
You nodded quickly, your hands clutching his arms, anchoring yourself as your body hummed with a new kind of intensity. "Yeah... i-I like it" you admitted, feeling your voice tremble with both excitement and nerves.
Sylus's smirk deepened as he pulled back slightly, watching you with a predatory gleam in his eyes. His hand slid up your body, his fingers curling around your throat-not hard enough to hurt but enough to remind you that he was in control. He leaned down, his lips brushing against yours as he whispered,
"Then I'll make sure you feel every bit of it."
His grip on your throat tightened ever so slightly, making your breath catch in your throat, your body arching up toward him. He knew exactly how to toe the line between pleasure and pain, pushing just enough to make your body crave more.
As he kissed you, his hand moved again, delivering a sharp, deliberate slap to your thigh. The sting sent a jolt of heat straight through you, your gasp muffled against his mouth. Sylus pulled back just enough to see your reaction, his eyes dark and filled with amusement. "That's it, sweetie. Don't hold back."
Your heart raced as the intensity between you grew, his touch now rougher, more deliberate. Every slap, every bite, was calculated, designed to push you further into that heady mix of pain and pleasure and through it all, he watched you, his expression unreadable but his every move purposeful.
"Tell me what you want, kitten" Sylus growled, his hand delivering another sharp smack, this time against your ass, the pain leaving a warm, pulsing sensation behind.
"Tell me how much you like it."
You whimpered, your body shaking with the force of the sensations coursing through you. "I... I love it" you managed to breathe out, your voice breaking. "I love it, Sylus..."
He grinned, clearly satisfied with your confession, his mouth descending on yours in a rough, heated kiss. "Good" he murmured against your lips, his hands gripping your body possessively. "Because I'm just getting started."
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readychilledwine ¡ 6 months ago
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Pieces of You pt 4
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Summary - After losing Feyre to childbirth, Rhysand finds himself leaning on one of her friends much more than he'd ever expected.
Warnings- Mourning, loss of a partner, loss of a friend, loss of parent, babies and the complications that come with raising them, slight neglect, slight angst to wrap it up before Fluff and smut begin, same editing warning (friend is arc reading, Liz will catch any other mistakes when she rereads this with fresh eyes)
A/n - I promised they wouldn't be a part long. What you're all waiting for will happen in the next part. 🫣
✨️ Series Masterlist ✨️ Rhysand Masterlist ✨️ Master Masterlist ✨️
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This nanny was not you.
You had the left house, as promised, Monday morning. You hadn't taken a single dress Rhys had bought his Little Mor, a single one of her toys, you didn't even take the blanket he had paid for with her name stitched into soft buttery fabric.
He watched as Nyx fought the female he had hired. He would only latch to her for a few moments before wailing, piercing the now all too quiet home with his confusion and frustration. This nanny was not you, and Nyx clearly was not going to accept her.
He had hoped by the afternoon Nyx would have been hungry enough to just latch, to cave, but that was not the case. The young heir was crying again, frustrated and hungry as he slowly wore himself out into another unscheduled nap. Rhysand zoned out the noise, his mind now on you, on the second chance of love, devotion, happiness he allowed to walk out the door.
Nyx had taken to you. He was a momma’s boy the second he was about to show preference. But Morwenna, Morwenna was Rhysand's. His own breathing filled the void of silence that had fall over the house, and as he stared at his paperwork, tears began to fall, he just hoped your mind was on him, or at least Nyx, as well.
His mind went to his Little Mor, his sweet girl. Her eyes always lit up for him, shrieks of joy and excitement were common in Rhysand's office.
You sighed and sunk into the couch, Azriel beside you as you did. “Come home,” he had been begging for the past two hours for you to see reason, to forgive Rhysand. He had explained what happened at dinner, watching as you slowly fell apart all over again. “He didn't mean a single word. I can tell.”
Azriel swallowed before standing, “I will be back. Kiss my niece for me when she wakes up. I'll come back to sing her to sleep tonight.”
You shook your head, leaning back into the couch as you did. “It felt like he did, Azriel. It felt like he just-” you stopped yourself from crying, not willing to hurt over some male who so easily threw you away. “He said I needed to stop acting like Nyx's mom.” You watched Azriel's face fall. Watched as his sun-kissed tan skin paled. “Then tried to tell me I could not take Morwenna with me.”
Screaming. Screaming was all Azriel heard as he walked into the new Riverhouse. Rhys was pacing the floor, bouncing Nyx as the sun fell and Cassian stood there, eyes watering and wide in panic. He took a spot next to Cassian, sharing a look of concern with his brother. “He refuses to latch on to his nanny,” Cassian's voice cracked. “And Madja keeps trying to tell Rhysand it's just going to be an adjustment period, but Nyx is hungry.”
Azriel nodded, mind flashing back to the subtle looks of pain on your face as you so much as moved or held his Little Mor. “And he won't just suck up his pride and take him to y/n?”
Cassian sighed. “He said he can't do that after what he has done. That there is no fixing the hurt he caused.” Anger had leaked into Cassian's soft voice. “I do not get how she can do this to Nyx.”
“You would do it to if you mate ignored your bond.” The weight of those words hit Cassian's chest, screaming in his like an alarm. “What.”
“Y/n and Rhysand are mates,” Azriel went to Rhys, stroking Nyx's back. “Let me take him to her?”
Rhys shook his head, ignoring the tears falling at his son's frustration. “I just need him to adjust.”
“Starving is not adjusting, Rhysand. It is neglect.” The High Lord turned to Azriel, glaring hard. “I know what you said to her. Go there, apologize, and have her feed him at the very least. She loves him.”
As if it was a spell place to curse Rhysand, Nyx must have caught the faint scent of you lingering to Azriel's soft t shirt. The heir calmed significantly, reaching for the material. “Give me your shirt so I can lay him down and we can discuss this.”
Azriel obeyed, hoping just the scent of you would be enough to give him a small nap while Azriel convinced Rhysand to let him take Nyx to you. Just for the night.
Rhysand sighed, laying Nyx down with Azriel's shirt underneath him. He would have been lying if anyone asked him if he had savored that soft scent clinging to the shirt. He walked out of the room and hardly made it 5 steps before the wailing began again. Rhys pulled the bottle filled with the mixture Madja had made from his pocket world before going back in.
Nyx was inconsolable. He had spent the better portion of the morning crying, screaming, refusing to sleep.
Rhysand picked him up, praying to anyone who would listen and wishing on every star that Nyx would just take this bottle. As soon as he latched, Rhysand watched his flawless little face make a deeper scowl before pushing the bottle away. You were Nyx's sole thought. Your smell, your skin under his, your voice. The piercing wail had Azriel and Cassian running up the stairs as soon as they heard.
Rhysand knew Nyx didn't fully understand the noise about to come from his mouth. Nyx didn't know it expressed exactly what he wanted, nor what the sound would mean. He didn't know that it would make his father crawl back to you less than 12 hours after you had left. The heir released a strangled cry over and over again of one of the only sounds he knew to make, "Ma. Ma. Ma!”
"No," Rhysand choked down the tears that were getting ready to fall. "He's crying for y/n. He's crying for his mama.” Rhys didn't wait for them, he didn't even say goodbye, he winnowed into your living room. You were curled up on the couch, instantly awake by the sounds of Nyx's crying.
"Is he crying for Feyre?" Cassian went to take a tentative step forward, just for Rhysand to stand and move quickly out of the room.
Rhysand didn't even have to ask. He didn't have to beg. You took the heir instantly and pulled him to you, placing him in his favorite spot to eat.
His tears had triggered Morwenna, though, and soon her soft cries filled the air. Rhysand ran to her. He ran to his daughter and cradled her tight to his chest. Her bright eyes instantly looked up at him, a smile taking place of where a deep frown was. “Hi baby girl,” her giggle instantly changed his mood. He walked her to the living room, watching as she instantly because to smile and shriek at the sight of Nyx.
“Give him a little bit, baby,” you didn't even look up from the tiny illyrian, stroking his brow as he ate. “He is very hungry and mama needs him to eat.” Rhys sat across from you, holding Little Mor tight to him. “She's been making d noises all day. To me, to Azriel, to no one. Just “dah duh deh” all day.”
“She missed her daddy,” Rhys held her up, rocking her gently side to side, “didn't you Morwenna. You missed daddy? 13 hours apart is much too long, isn't it, my little darling.” You shook your head, fighting the smile as Wen giggled at Rhysand.
You felt your heart skip a best as he kissed her cheeks and then her tummy. Rhysand was a wonderful father, and watching him in this element, this area of self-doubt, he had made all feelings of anger melt away. He looked to you instantly, claws gently tapping on the fortress of your mind before you allowed him in. “Let me take us home?” Home, the word replayed in your mind before you nodded, holding a hand to him. Home sounded so good.
He winnowed you two back to the Riverhouse, making Wen giggle even more at the starlight that surrounded you four. You walked in and stopped dead in your tracks, eyes Azriel up and down. “Where are your clothes?”
Azriel looked shameless, muscled torso on display as he held Cassian in a headlock. “I'm choking out Cassian and your concern is my lack of a shirt?”
Cassian raised a hand to you, face slightly red. His eyes had a hint of guilt in them as he tapped Azriel's abs. “Y/n,” Cassian moved to guide you to the couch, smiling at a still latched Nyx and then moved Rhysand to be next you. “I want to apologize.” You knit your brows at him as he sat and Azriel glared.
“I made some unfair statements without consideration for you and Rhysand. I did not think about how my words would affect your relationship with each other, or how I cheapend the new mating bond you two share.”
Cassian looked raw. Like months of build up and emotion hit him. “We prepared you know? We knew she was going to die, we begged and prayed for a solution, and just when hope came it crashed like a tidal wave. Nesta and I won't even touch each other. The guilt-”
“You have nothing to be guilty for, Cass,” Rhys interrupted him. “I'm the one who had sex with her. I'm the one who-”
“It was an accident,” you spoke softly, pulling the focus to you. “Feyre's death was a tragic mistake and accident. You all did not know the extent of her shifting magic. You didn't know it temporarily changed her that deeply.”
Rhys seemed love drunk as he handed you Little Mor, kissing both babes before you walked away. He was silent until you left, eyes trailing your body. “Cassian, I love her.”
Rhys sobbed softly, hearing words from you many had whispered before felt so different. Like a soothing balm over a wound, slowly healing it. “Cassian, Nesta did not know that the outcome of her bargaining with a God would be a cruel trick. There's no guilt to be had. She gave everything back, made herself the Cauldron’s servant. She was too young to read those unspoken lines.” Nyx finally let go, deep asleep in your arms. “I'm going to go lay him down. There is nothing for me to forgive because you did not intentionally harm me, Cassian, but maybe you three should speak.”
“I know.”
“That doesn't mean I never loved Feyre. Nor that I've forgotten her.”
A second “I know” broke through Cassian's lips, his shoulders falling as it did. “I miss her.”
Rhys felt the tears welling, felt them falling before he could will them away. “I do too. Every fucking day I miss her. I miss her hair, her laugh, her voice. I miss her correcting me.” He watched Cassian fall more, mourning the sister he had lost openly for the first time.
“But when I'm with y/n, it hurts less. When I see y/n smile, I feel more whole again. When I hear her laugh, I feel like I'm alive again. When I see her with Nyx, when I see his smile when she's holding him or playing with them, I feel like Feyre is here, nudging me towards y/n.”
Azriel's voice came, soft and slow. “Feyre would want you to move on, Rhysand. She would have wanted you to find happiness. She would probably fight all of us for being this sad.”
The thought of that made Cassian genuinely smile. His eyes sparkling with fond memories of Feyre Cursebreaker stomping her feet when he'd beat her during a sparring match. “Her and Feyre both do this thing, maybe it's an artistic thing, where they look at things really close and back away slowly.”
Rhys started laughing immediately knowing what his brother meant. “Y/n did it with one of my outfits. She said I looked great as long as she stayed 5 feet away.”
Azriel put a hand on Cassian's shoulder. “This is a roundabout way of us telling you we support you, Rhysand. We support you and y/n.”
“Two mates,” Cassian said slowly. “Imagine having two mates, Az. Two females that you get to love unconditionally and annoy whenever you'd like.”
Rhys and Azriel shared a silent look, a soft, "Not yet” coming through to Rhysand's mind. “We will leave you and y/n alone to talk.”
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“There won't be much talking,” Rhysand stood slowly. “I've always been better at expressing my emotions physically.”
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itneverendshere ¡ 2 months ago
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lovee bartender!reader and rafe soo much, theyre daydream content fr!!! <3 if it takes your fancy, maybe a little piece where readers tired so she puts her pride away and does go to rafe for help (even if only for something very small) and hes just elated, ecstatic, all the words for it! that man is always so stressed, need him to have some peace LOL
she eventually becomes a little less headstrong about his help so this when she finally really understands that’s is okay to need someone else sometimes 🙂‍↕️🫂 thank you for the request! and also thank you for loving them too 🫶🏻
year dark night and now i see daylight - r.c
pairing: rafe x pogue!reader (bartender!reader universe)
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You wiped down the bar for what felt like the hundredth time tonight. 
The lights glinted off the glasses, making you squint. You were so tired. Your legs felt like they would give out at any moment, and the tension in your shoulders was making your neck ache, but there was no time to stop. 
There was never any time to stop.
You’d been running on fumes for days now—maybe weeks?—but who was counting? Not you, clearly. Because taking a break or slowing down?
That just wasn’t in your vocabulary. You were fine. You could handle it. You always handled it. You didn’t need help.
The headache you’d been ignoring was getting worse, though, creeping behind your eyes, making you blink more than usual. Your hands were shaky, and if you were being honest with yourself (which you rarely were these days), your body was running on empty. But still, there was work to do, and people needed drinks, and you weren’t about to let anyone think you couldn’t do your job.
You paused, gripping the edge of the bar a little tighter than necessary when the room seemed to tilt, just for a second. That was new. You sucked in a slow breath, trying to steady yourself. 
Nope. Not now. Can’t do this here. 
There was no way you were going to break down in the middle of your shift, in front of everyone. You’d tough it out like you always did.
“Hey!” Your co-worker voice cut through the pain, snapping you out of your thoughts. He was waving you over to another table where more customers had just sat down.
Perfect. More people. Just what you needed.
You forced your feet to move, pushing through the exhaustion as best you could. 
You felt that familiar wave of anxiety, your new best friend, but you shoved it down like always.
You could handle it. You had to. Because asking for help? Letting someone see you weren’t doing okay? That was never an option. Except…maybe this time, it was.
You hesitated behind the bar, staring blankly at the group that had just sat down. They could wait a minute, right? Just one minute to pull yourself together. You’d earned that, at least.
Before you knew it, your phone was in your hand, thumb hovering over one name in your contacts: Rafe.
You hated asking for help. He worried about you enough as it was, constantly telling you to slow down or take it easy. You usually brushed him off. But tonight…tonight felt different. You were running on nothing but pride and stubbornness at this point, and even that was starting to crack.
Swallowing hard, you hit Call.
It rang twice before you heard his voice. “Hey, baby, what’s up?” Rafe sounded surprised—probably because you never called him when you were working. You could hear the concern creeping in already.
You squeezed your eyes shut, hating how vulnerable you felt just by calling him. “Can you—uh, can you come pick me up? I’m kinda…done.”
There was a beat of silence on the other end, like he was processing the fact that you, of all people, were asking for help. When he spoke again, his voice was almost relieved. “Yeah, ‘course. I’ll be there in ten. Don’t move, okay?”
You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you, the tight knot in your chest loosening just a little.
Hanging up, you slumped against the counter, finally letting yourself breathe. Ten minutes. You could make it ten more minutes.
Rafe arrived faster than you expected, his tall frame pushing through the double doors of the club. His eyes locked onto you immediately, and the second he saw you, his tough guy expression dropped. You didn’t realize how close you were to falling apart until you saw the way he was looking at you. 
“You okay?” he asked, crossing the bar in a few quick strides, his hand already reaching for yours.
For once, you didn’t brush him off with a quick “I’m fine.” You just shook your head, letting out a shaky breath. “Not really.”
He didn’t say anything right away, just pulled you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you in that way that made you feel safe, like it was okay to just not be strong for a second. You hadn’t noticed how badly you needed this—how badly you needed him—until now. Rafe’s chin rested against the top of your head, and you could feel his heart beating under your cheek.
When you finally pulled back, he didn’t let go right away, his blue eyes searching your face. His brow furrowed as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, his thumb brushing softly along your cheek. You must’ve looked worse than you thought because the worry in his eyes was impossible to miss.
“You really weren’t kidding about being done, huh?” His voice was gentle, but you could hear the hint of frustration in it. Not at you, but at the fact that you’d been pushing yourself this hard without saying anything sooner.
You gave him a weak smile, trying to shrug it off. “Yeah, I guess I went a little overboard this week. But I’m fine now. You’re here.”
He sighed, shaking his head but pulling you closer again, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your lower back, “You’re gonna give me a heart-attack before thirty.”
You bit your lip, that familiar guilt settling in your chest. You knew he was right. You knew he worried all the time, every single day. But admitting you needed help—especially to him—took a lot of energy, like ripping away the last bit of control you had. And control was how you survived. How you kept everything in check.
He wasn’t going to think less of you for it. If anything, he looked elated that you’d let him in, that you trusted him enough to ask. You nodded, feeling the tears start to prick the back of your eyes. “I know. I just—” You broke off, not really knowing how to explain it. “I keep doing this. I’m sorry.”
“I got you,” he murmured, kissing the top of your head. “Let’s get you home.”
The quiet of the truck felt like a much-needed break from everything, the engine lulling you into something close to sleep. You hadn’t realized just how tense you were until now, with the night air coming through the window and Rafe’s hand resting on your thigh, his thumb tracing lazy circles against your skin.
You leaned your head back against the seat, watching the headlights of passing cars flash by. It felt weird to not be constantly thinking about what came next, what else needed to get done, or how much work you still had to finish. For once, it was like your brain was actually giving you a break, like it was saying, “Yeah, okay, you can relax now. You’re not alone.”
You glanced over at Rafe, his jaw set in concentration as he drove, but the way his fingers held onto you so gently told you everything. He hadn’t said much since you left the club, but you didn’t need him to.
“Are you hungry?” 
You blinked, realizing you hadn’t even thought about food. You weren’t really sure if you were hungry or just exhausted. “Not really,” you admitted. “I just wanna get home.”
Rafe nodded, giving your leg a gentle squeeze. “Okay. Almost there.”
You let out a breath, grateful that he didn’t push. He never did. It was one of the reasons being with him felt so easy, even when everything else in your life felt overwhelming. He never tried to fix things for you, never made you feel like you were weak for needing help. He just showed up—every time.
The minutes passed, and before you knew it, you were pulling up to his place. The sight of his house—your second home at this point—made your anxiety loosen even more. You didn’t have to do anything here. No one needed you to be “on.” You could just…exist.
“You good?” he asked, offering his hand to help you out.
“Yeah, I’m good,” you mumbled, though your body still felt like it might give out if you let yourself relax too much. You took his hand anyway, letting him help you down.
Once you were inside, you kicked off your shoes and practically collapsed onto the couch, feeling the cushions sink under you like they were the softest thing in the world. You pulled your knees up, wrapping your arms around them as Rafe moved around the room, grabbing a blanket and tossing it over you before sitting down next to you, close but not smothering.
He knew exactly how to handle you—how to be there without overwhelming you. He just sat there, his arm slung over the back of the couch, waiting for you to speak or not speak, whatever you needed. And that’s when it hit you how lucky you were to have him.
“I’m sorry,” you said quietly, not really sure why the words came out, but feeling like you had to say something.
Rafe frowned, his hand brushing over your shoulder. “For what?”
“For… I don’t know. For not telling you sooner that I was struggling. For always acting like I can handle everything when I clearly can’t.”
He shook his head, giving you that soft smile that made you feel like the most important person in the world. “You don’t have to apologize for that, baby. I know you. You you don’t have to be perfect all the time.”
You bit your lip, “I just don’t want to feel like I’m dumping all my shit on you.”
Rafe leaned in a little closer, his hand now resting on your knee. “You’re not dumping anything on me. We’re in this together. I love you, and I want to be there for you. You don’t have to do this alone.”
Your heart fluttered at his words, but this time it wasn’t from stress. It was from the realization that he was right.
He’d always been right and you knew it, it just took you months to process it.
You exhaled, leaning your head against his shoulder, “I love you too,” you whispered, the words feeling more powerful now, more real.
Because this wasn’t just love. This was trust.
He kissed the top of your head, his fingers gently running through your hair as he pulled you closer. He wasn’t frustrated or upset. He was just there, in that patient way that made you fall for him in the first place.
"You’re really too good to me, you know that?" you said softly, tracing your finger over the back of his hand.
He shook his head. “Nah, you deserve it. Besides, it’s not like you make it easy for me to help.”
He said it teasingly, but there was truth in his words. You knew you had a habit of trying to do everything on your own, shutting people out when you felt overwhelmed.
You looked down, feeling a little sheepish. "Yeah, I know. I’m working on it."
"Hey," he said, gently tilting your chin up so you were looking at him again. "I’m kidding. I’m here for you, okay?”
Your heart did that little flip thing it always did when he said stuff like that, like you couldn’t believe someone could love you that much, but at the same time, you knew it was true. 
“If I mess up again, just remind me that you said I don’t have to be perfect."
He chuckled, pulling you back into his arms. “You know, you’re probably gonna fall asleep on me right here.”
You smiled, your eyes already half-closed. “Maybe that’s the plan.”
You knew he was grinning without looking, feeling it he leaned down to kiss the top of your head again.
“Okay, but you’re definitely not getting out of taking care of yourself tomorrow. I’m making you pancakes in the morning. You’re eating, and you’re not gonna fight me on it.”
“Mmm, pancakes sound good,” you mumbled, already feeling the pull of sleep creeping in. “But only if you make the chocolate chip ones.”
“Deal.”
Wrapped up in his arms, the world outside of this little bubble didn’t feel so overwhelming anymore
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lcriedlastnight ¡ 2 months ago
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lost the breakup | charles leclerc
○tw: alcohol, swears, charles is a proper dick, silly reader, this is the most angsty thing over ever wrote. to celebrate charles win today!○
♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ : w/c: 4.3k of pure hell.
༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶
"this would be so much easier without you!" it felt like those words flitted around your brain in a loop ever since that night in charles' flat. you hadn't intended it to turn into a massive fight, all you said was you couldn't wait for summer break to finally spend some time with your boyfriend. but seemingly that was all it took for charles to go off on one, roaring at you as if you had actually done something wrong.
you had stood, staring at the man after he had stopped ranting about how being with you only brought him down and how life before you was much easier on him. you couldn't believe that was actually what he thought of your relationship. i mean it wasn't perfect, but who's was? all that you thought mattered was that you tried to make each other happy, and up until today you had thought that you were succeeding in that, clearly not.
"do you mean that?" there was an obvious wobble in your voice that you had tried to disguise but it didn't matter, charles didn't care anyways. you knew that now.
all it took for you to scramble to find somewhere new was that singular nod of his head. you knew he wasn't sure if he meant it but he nodded. he fucking nodded. you could've forgiven him if he took it all back then and there, he didn't even have to beg for your forgiveness you would've just given him it. but he didn't. you didn't mean as much to him as he did to you and he had made that oh so clear tonight. so you did what any sane person would do, you grabbed a pair of shoes and a jacket and left. a part of you thought that maybe he had said all that just to get a rise out of you and to create a fight between the two of you, for whatever reason? you didn't know but you had a nagging feeling that was why he did it. or maybe your brain was just trying to soften the blow of your boyfriend secretly despising you for god knows how long.
so yeah, that was how you ended up rotting in your bed. at this point you really shouldn't still care about him anymore but your heart refused to let him go. and it annoyed you so much. how was it fair that you sat here mourning your relationship and what it could've been while he was out there winning grand prix's and clubbing every other night, seen with a different girl every single time. while he was out picking up girls you were picking up your heart, that had gone straight in the journal as soon as you had thought it.
the fans had realised something was up by the second day of your breakup. you hadn't even collected all of your things from his yet and they were already trending you both on twitter. it honestly felt like the last thing you needed right now but you smiled through the pain and tried to make your instagram feel as normal as possible until charles put up a statement about it, so that you could too. then you could finally put this relationship to rest.
being with charles had given you a following of sorts of your own and you felt like you owed them something, seeing as they only liked you because you were dating- used to date charles. your best friend and current roommate (for the time being, seeing as you were living with charles full time before the breakup) jess had told you millions of times that they were just random strangers and you didn't owe them anything. it never eased the weight you felt though.
one night after the third night in a row of summer break (that very same summer break that you were longing to spend with charles) that charles was out and had been pictured taking some random girl home was the night where jess had tried to snap you out of it.
"i think it hurts more that literally none of them look like me? like if any of them resembled me at least i would know that he missed me, even a little bit. even if it was subconscious, you know?" you had ranted, staring holes into your phone that had showed you the dreaded pictures of the three girls who all looked alike in regards to each other but nothing like you. in fact they were the complete opposite of you in every single way.
jess had swiped your phone off of you and slid it into the back pocket of her jeans.
"look, you technically broke up with him but it doesn't matter. he clearly doesn't care so why the fuck should you?" ever so blunt, jess was.
"i don't mean to be mean, you know that. i mean this in the nicest way possible but you have to get over yourself. this isn't the end of the world as much as it feels like it. the world has continued to spin this past week and it will continue to do so no matter what so you need to get up and live your life. you're wasting your emotions on a man who literally doesn't care whether you live or die at this point."
although it was filled to the brim with all the shit you didn't want to hear, jess knew exactly what you needed and she gave you the wake up call you had been needing since that night. that night she helped you wash your bed sheets and tidy your room up, moving the furniture while blasting taylor swift's breakup songs. jess was still letting you grieve the relationship because she knew better than anyone, that you can't just hear one inspiring speech and finally stop caring about him. even though she knew that you would stop caring sooner rather than later with the way he was acting.
★・・・・・・★
"you better not wear that skirt with those heels!" jess' girlfriend, hailey had shouted over the thrumming bass of someone's getting ready playlist. you weren't too sure who's it was but you knew for certain it was not the usual music that was played in the flat.
'the inchident' (which you thought was a particularly cruel play on words) had happened almost a month ago and jess had invited your closest friends for a night out in monaco. as well as her girlfriend, she had also invited sophie, probably your second best friend.
"why?" sophie asked back, brows down as she moves the skirt in her hands, looking for an issue with it. "it looks good, no?". three shakes of heads are her answers.
"soph it looks so fugly." jess said, trying to pull on a pair of doc martens. you had burst out laughing at that and it had set everyone else off too. you knew pre-drinks were a great idea. the group had already taken three shots already and for a lightweight like you, this was the perfect state to go to the club like. drunk enough that the night seemed endless, plus you would save a fortune on drinks while you were there too, seeing as you were almost on your way to being absolutely smashed. exactly what you needed after this past month.
as you all clamber into the taxi to take you to the club, the group chatters with each other while jess is chatting away to the driver. she got so talkative when she had alcohol in her system. the ride to the club wasn't long so when you all arrive and after you had all given about a million thank you's to the driver you head into the club.
you and sophie find a table to sit at while jess and hailey head in the direction of the bar, hailey offering to buy the first round in celebration of you finally going out with them for the first time in months.
in the taxi ride over, sophie was telling you all about the boy she was speaking to and how he may or may not be a famous athlete. after a joke or two from you about watching what she's getting into she tells you that she had been on a few dates with him and they were days away, as she put it, from becoming official. with all of this in mind you still had no idea why, when you were both on the hunt for a free table, scouring around the very back of the club, she suddenly stops in her tracks, grabs your arm and turns to face you. the poor girl looked like she was about to pass out. surely she hadn't had that much to drink already, you had just gotten here, you had thought to yourself before she spoke up.
"that's him! he's here?!" sophie whisper shouts as she kind of just stands there, almost like shes lagging. you look at her, confusion plastered all over your face.
"who? who's here?" you ask her. it's easy to tell she is annoyed at your question but she's much too preoccupied to tell you off for it in her usual sophie manner. like her fight or flight kicks in at that very moment she suddenly pulls you towards the large booth filled with people, seemingly all men but maybe a few girls from what you could make out. it was actually really dark in this part of the club.
"my man." the blonde girl whispers to you like it was obvious, nothing was obvious to you when you were sober never mind this tipsy. you recognise a man at the end of the row but it doesn't sink in your muddled brain until you are standing directly in front of near enough half of the grid.
you stand like a deer in headlights as it clicks in your brain. the weight of a thousand busses suddenly weighing down on your chest. oh this was so not good. you hadn't looked to see if he was here but did you really need to? it seemed like he was going out at any chance he could find since the two of you last spoke. you avert your attention to sophie who was standing very closely to the man at the edge, who you now could see what carlos. you had no idea that was who she was talking about.
you hear someone in front of you call your name, one of the drivers, maybe lando? he had always been nice to you any time you and charles went out together and ran into him. you don't reply, not that you get the chance to because an arm is gripping yours from behind and at first you swear your heart falls right to the ground and is so very close to taking you with it but you look over and see it was only jess and hailey with your drinks. this was not how tonight was supposed to go.
jess says something you can't hear to sophie and the blonde nods back before you feel your best friend pulling you away from the table. you still feel frozen as she drags you to a free table you and sophie must have missed on your own hunt. you felt like you were having an out of body experience. there was no fucking way in hell that just happened. no way he was here. why couldn't he just let you have this one night to yourself without ruining it? he had already ruined your life, what else does he want?
hailey slides you your drink of choice and heads back up to the bar to order another, knowing you'll need it. jess could see the look in your eyes even if you couldn't feel it yet. what stage of grief was this you were in now? because all you wanted to do was to get the ground to swallow you whole. maybe depression. jess' soft voice pulls you out of your daze.
"hey, drink it. i'm not encouraging drinking to numb your feelings but tonight is not the night to deal with whatever the fuck that was." jess says, her voice as comforting as she could make it. you really appreciated it so you downed your drink and waited for hailey to come with your next.
"we'll process this tomorrow but tonight, we drink." hailey says as she returns. you swear you hear her curse sophie under her breath as you drink. you didn't blame sophie though, she didn't know he would be there and clearly didn't think before she acted. you think that maybe hailey and jess are mad at her now. great, another thing in your life falling apart. you were so getting shitfaced tonight.
the drinks blended into one another as you danced with your friends after sophie had joined you, after promising to carlos she would leave with him.
you were swaying to one of your favourite songs when carlos come over to distract sophie, you just smiled at the two 'couples' that surrounded you. even if there was a clear favourite, nothing against carlos but c'mon. it was jess and hailey. speaking of they had signalled to tell you they were off to join the long line for the toilets. they had asked of you wanted to come but you didn't need to pee so you said no. you should've went though, you probably would need to pee by the time you got to the front of the line but your drunk brain was not in the mood for rational thinking.
that's why when a man slides his arms around you don't protest it and instead lean into him. it had nothing to do with the familiar scent flooding your nose or the hums you heard every single night in your sleep, nope. nothing to do with that twat.
"This one is your favourite, no?" his accent fills your ears and you can literally feel the tension from the past month ease out of you. you lean further into charles as you sway a little to the beat. you were far too drunk to dance properly, the way you were when you first stepped foot onto the dance floor.
"mhm." you nod as your hands slide down to rest on his clasped ones, which were holding your stomach to keep you close, you hoped. charles moves his head to right behind your ear, just so you can hear him better. there was no way he didn't hear or even feel your breath hitch at the feeling of his breath on your ear. if you weren't this plastered then you would be so embarrassed at how easily you let charles do this again. you could even hear the rational part of your brain screaming at you, asking you what you were doing but you could barely even see at this point so of course you ignored it in favour of being the girl in his arms again.
"then why'd all your friends leave you, sweetheart?" charles asks, it feels teasing and maybe even a little mocking but there is no way you would be able to tell the difference in this state, so you just respond, dumbly. "they went to pee."
charles laughs in your ear and it sends goosebumps throughout your body and puts a sappy grin on your face. you hadn't heard his laugh in a while and it felt so good to hear it again. it felt like home to you and god had you been homesick.
you would've done anything the man asked you to when you were like this, well maybe sober too but when you were sober you would've definitely put up more of a fight about doing it. maybe charles was taking advantage of this as he practically moves you both to the next song that plays. it's a good job that jess and hailey come back when they do because you would've done anything for him. it felt like he actually wanted you again. you had missed him like this and here he was acting like he couldn't get enough of you. every part of you hoped to remember this in the morning as both girls pulled you away from his grasp (without any fight from charles, which told the girls everything they needed to know) and took you home, without as much as a goodbye to sophie. safe to say she was not going to be invited round again after tonight.
the next morning consisted of waking up at three pm with the sorest headache you think you've ever experienced and a blurry memory. turns out your hoping and praying last night had worked because the only thing you can remember is the way charles held you. the words he said weren't one hundred percent clear but god if this didn't set you back three weeks. jess was furious with sophie and hailey had literally cut her off in every single way possible. jess tells you over dinner that night that hailey had blocked sophie last night when you had gotten home and it did make you laugh but now you had to mourn the end of two relationships. you knew it was for the better but it still killed you, ripped you apart from the inside.
the thing that hurt you most was charles. you reflect on it in the shower after dinner. he knew how drunk you were and he still came over, clearly because he knew it was the only time you would let him back in without any fight. did that mean he missed you like you missed him? or was he just doing it because he could, showing you (a drunk you, mind you but still you nonetheless) that no matter what he still had his claws in you? your questions were answered as you scrolled through a gossip page and seen that charles left with another girl who looked nothing like you last night. you really had to stop looking through those pages, it did nothing but bring you down.
★・・・・・・★
nothing prepared you from the instagram dm from the quiet australian mclaren driver about another month after the club incident. he had never really spoken to oscar a lot before back when you were a regular in the paddock but it was still super nice to hear from him. it didn't mean you were prepared for him to ask you if you wanted paddock passes to be guests of mclaren at the next race. when you had asked what you had done exactly to deserve this gift, oscar had responded with 'i know your birthday is coming up and i also know how much you love f1'. you cried to jess before texting him back that you would take them. he was such a lovely boy.
you knew how bad ferrari were doing because you were an f1 fan way before you had even met charles so you of course kept up with the sport even after the breakup. even though it killed you to see his face on the screen. and you would never admit this to anyone, not even jess but seeing ferrari do so badly did make your heart ache for charles.
a few days before the race jess takes you shopping to find the outfit that makes charles beg for you back just so you can let him down harshly. her words of course, you would never even think that. as much as he's hurt you there wasn't a bone in your body that wanted to hurt him in return.
"i'm not drinking today, or tonight." you inform jess as you enter the paddock, the cameras immediately snapping in your face. you had not been in the eyes of the media for a good few months and now coming back to this made you feel dizzy but you powered through it because you had missed attending races so much. you found yourself beating up past you for not appreciating the privilege you had, getting to attend all those races.
"mhm, sure you aren't." jess doesn't even try and entertain you. you roll your eyes at her words.
"we both know what happened the last time alcohol and a certain ferrari driver mixed and i, for one, don't feel like going back down that road again." you try to make a joke out of it you're sure it would've worked if it was anyone but jess, she knows you far too well.
oscar greets you not long after and has the audacity to thank you for accepting his invite, he was literally the sweetest boy who's ever walked the earth and jess was sure to let him know of that fact. it left him with a big grin and rosy cheeks.
you and jess both cheer on the mclaren cars, which you have to admit, was one of the weirdest things about the full experience. you couldn't help but let your eyes wander to the red of the ferrari cars every now and then. you will your eyes to shift in the opposite direction every time. no way was anyone catching you lacking today, not on jess' watch that was for sure.
lando and oscar end up both on the podium so it was a great finish for the papaya team. oscar comes over with lando this time, after the podium and they both thank you and jess for coming again and this time you give them both swety, champagne covered hugs, unaware of the eyes peering into your soul.
said boy catches you on your way out, again when you're alone while jess makes a quick pitstop at the bathroom. you were hanging around across the hall, waiting for her to come out.
"hey, didn't know you still came to races." charles tries to make casual conversation with you. like the months you two were together didn't mean anything and like he hadn't just used you as a player in his game when you were hammered last month. this man has no dignity you swear. you had thought a few nights after the night out at the club that night.
"oscar asked me." you take a page out if jess' book and stick to the blunt responses. you knew you had moved on from the boy in front of you because as soon as he made his way over you weren't nervous or excited, you were annoyed. it made you feel happy and a little healed. charles seems surprised at your bluntness so he cuts to the chase.
"i miss you." he utters your name. "i miss you so much. i keep dreaming about us, and every morning, it feels like I've lost you all over again." you don't even look in his eyes to see if he's telling the truth. you used to be able to read him for filth, like he was your favourite book that you had read and re-read a million times, a book you had scribbled all your thoughts onto. now he just feels like a book you used to love when you were a child and as much as it helped shape you into the person you are now, you have new favourites now, that you read over and over and write inside, for someone else to read your thoughts and feelings.
you do though, see it hitting charles that you won't let him walk all over the top of you anymore. you see it register on his face and he makes a move to leave you be. maybe the you from a few weeks ago would've cried at the thought of this happening but whatever has happened to you in the past couple week has helped you grow mentally and helped you know your worth. charles walks away without so much as a goodbye, and you hope it kills him.
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princessbrunette ¡ 3 months ago
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⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … GOOD GRACES ♡
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track three of the short n’sweet series. pairing: toxicex!johnb x reader. based loosely off the song good graces by sabrina carpenter. enjoy! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა
it was a tactic to get john b’s attention and that was so clear to him. whatever you were doing was fucking working, and that irritated him.
john b would like to say he was a pretty calm and reasonable guy, but as he stands in the centre of some random girls pool party, watching you hanging off the arm of some douchebag kook— he can’t help but nearly squeeze all the alcohol out of his red solo cop. he settles on shakily bringing it to his lips instead, eyes not leaving your form as he sips the bitter liquor down. shit, that was strong. but not as strong as the burning jealousy in his chest.
he knew how it looked — the jealousy, the rage in his eyes. there were very few things that could get him this wired up and maybe the copious amounts of alcohol in his body wasn’t helping, but if you didn’t stop grinding your bikini bottom clad ass against that random guys shorts, barely offering the pogue boy a glance over your shoulder — there’d be hell to pay. like mentioned, he could be pretty calm and reasonable, but tonight he felt like breaking a kooks jaw.
he saw the opportunity to get to you arise when your new friend left your side for a moment to play a round of beer pong, which is when john b all but wrapped a hand round your arm and kidnapped you into a nearby hallway.
“jesus, what are you doing you psycho?” you accuse — loud, unabashed and clearly tipsy. the brunette squints, used to your theatrics.
“you serious? hm? him? you brought that guy?” he deadpans, tilting his head expectantly as if waiting for an answer.
“are you serious? i can bring who i want where i want. we’re broken up.” you huff, sticking your chin in the air stubbornly as you cross your arms over your chest. maybe his hormones were all out of whack, but he swears you’re doing it to press your tits together and get a rise out of him. he clenches his fist, pressing his lips together in self restraint.
“do you know how much that’s killing me? like — like can you imagine the scene you’d cause if i came here with a girl— no, not just a girl— a kook girl?” he whisper yells, looming over you and god do you wanna be pissed off. but in that backwards cap and baggy tshirt, your ex boyfriend looks more than delectable and it fuels you beyond belief to see that he still cares so much. perhaps you’d throw him a bone, addicted to putting him through the pain he put you through when you were together.
a salacious smile spreads across your glossed lips as you stare up at him, waiting for him to finish his little tantrum.
“you know, you should talk to me nicely john b. especially if you want to get in my good graces.” you drag it out slowly, like every word had a double meaning attached to it and now he’s falling back a little, face falling in realisation that you might be on the same page tonight. he blinks, staring you down for a few more moments just to make sure before shaking his head and ushering you borderline violently to the bathroom at the end of the hall. he’s sure your friend wouldn’t miss you too sorely.
as soon as that doors locked, john b is doing the one thing he’d been dying to do all night — and that was drop to his knees and force your legs open, locking eyes with you solemnly as he peels your bikini bottom to the side. it’s to no surprise, you’re soaking wet to the point where he couldn’t believe it wasn’t leaking out the sides for the world to see. for such a sweet and innocent girl, you sure did get off on toxic foreplay.
“i can’t believe you.” he huffs, hot breath making your folds flutter for him and you lean your warm body against the cold tiles, pulling his head to your cunt where it belonged.
“please.” you shudder, and now you’re the one begging — needing the hot mouth of your ex boyfriend to dull the ache. he feels some power regained, knowing that you had such arousal that could only be tamed by him.
“yeah? been waiting for this puppy?” he coos as he kisses around your pubic mound, thick finger wiggling its way to your sopping hot hole that awaited him.
“jus’ dont tease, c’mon.” you plead and he decides to stick to the words you told him. good graces, you said — and what better what to get into your good books than to make you cum so hard you couldn’t hold yourself up against the bathroom wall any longer?
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kislnd ¡ 3 months ago
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silent treatment - george clarke~
synopsis: george leaves y/n wondering what their relationship is, a brief encounter between them gives him the chance to clarify.
notes: noticing i clearly love a cheeky fwb plot 😭 i promise i have other plots stored in the drafts (also the fact this was not the george fic i was talking about in my previous post loool expect that one eventually)
requests are also open!
warnings: slightly mature & angsty, mentions of alcohol
word count: ~2.9k
masterlist
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y/n found herself mindlessly checking her notifications yet again. as expected, there was nothing new. stop it, pull yourself together, she mentally cursed herself - never in a million years did she think a man could have this effect on her. usually she was fairly good at moving on, independence had always been her thing, but this time it was definitely different and she didn't know why. quite frankly it was scary, although she did feel like this unexplored territory was equally exciting as it was terrifying. over the past week y/n had been unable to shake him from her mind, flashes of their time spent together plague her mind - the way his hands felt on her body, the look in his eyes before he kissed her, the way he tasted. memories like those couldn't simply go away, nor did she really want them to.
"you're just being pathetic now," she said aloud to herself, "and now you're talking to yourself like a crazy person." y/n knew she needed to get out and get her mind off him, which once again, she did think was a little pathetic - it's not like she was going through a break up or anything nearly as painful as she was making it out to be. she shook away her thoughts and pulled out her phone, this time ignoring all of her notifications, and any thoughts of george, and opened a group chat of her closest girlfriends.
is anyone down to come out for drinks tonight?
she hit send on the message and waited, realistically she knew her friends were always raring to come out so their replies wouldn't be anything she didn't already know. more often than not they were the ones to drag y/n out for some fresh air. sure enough after a few minutes most of them had replied with a series of excited agreements.
the evening came around quickly. luckily y/n had already raided her entire wardrobe earlier in the day in a bid to distract herself, so her outfit was ready along with the right shoes to match. she had even gone as far as scouring pinterest for a few makeup looks that would compliment the colours of her outfit.
//
living near the centre of london had both its pros and cons but right now, y/n was just thankful that her walk to the chosen bar was only very short. as she stood in front of the establishment nerves crept up inside her. what even was there to be nervous about? it was just another evening out with her friends, people she had known forever. moreover, she had been to this exact bar several times, hell she could probably even name the regulars at this point. "sorry, excuse me," a low voice came from behind her, causing her to jump to the side. "sorry," she mumbled, glancing at the man who appeared to be carrying far more cocktails than his hands could comfortably allow. the night was getting cooler now and she anticipated her friends were probably waiting for her inside and had been for some time, either that or they were watching the whole ordeal from the window and would laugh at her later. you'll feel better once you get inside, y/n told herself and with that, she turned and walked briskly to the entrance.
her friends were not hard to find, despite not even being drunk yet they managed to be some of the loudest people in the room. y/n smiled at the sounds of their chattering and squeezed through the hoards of people swarming the bar to reach their table and sat down with them. for the first time in a week, she finally felt at ease, like she could fully loosen up with no worries.
//
"can you get me another vodka coke please?" y/n's friend pleaded for the third time, drawing out the 'e'. "god you do whinge," y/n rolled her eyes playfully, "but i will, only if you promise to shut up." the group laughed, a little too hard - at that moment y/n could confirm she was the most sober there. however, it was out of self preservation. she knew in the morning everything would come flooding back to her and she didn't fancy wallowing in her own pity with a headache. the bar was quite empty, y/n thought, especially in comparison to how it had been earlier, but that was definitely because everyone else was too drunk to not be up dancing. she was honestly grateful there was a clear path towards a bartender who didn't appear to be serving anyone.
"hi, could i get a vodka coke please?" she asked the bartender, who she could now see was mopping up a puddle of what was probably various alcohols. "sure, just give me one sec." the bartender smiled and continued soaking the puddle up. "no problem," y/n shot him a warm smile and leant against the bar, watching intently. judging by the sheer volume of liquid she didn't anticipate 'one sec' would be anything remotely close to one second.
"excuse me mate," y/n was ripped from her thoughts by an uncomfortably familiar voice, one that she simultaneously craved hearing and never wanted to hear again. she snapped her head around to the opposite end of the bar, where she spotted him. george was stood, trying to get the attention of another bartender who was busy shelving some bottles. she wasn't sure if this was some kind of sick joke, the one person she was trying to get away from had somehow magically appeared in front of her. if there was a god, she was sure he was punishing her. naturally, her bartender was still busy with the puddle - a puddle that was barely even visible now. why he couldn't leave the droplets for a moment and serve her, y/n didn't understand. she couldn't wait to get away from the bar and he wouldn't be able to conjure the drink up in a split second. to be honest, she wasn't even sure she cared to return to her table with the drink.
y/n couldn't help but steal another glance at george. he was still just as attractive, if not more attractive than she remembered. the way his biceps flexed as he rested his arms on the edge of the bar, his perfect smile as he thanked the bartender for the drink... y/n knew she should tear her eyes away from him but she just couldn't do it. she was weak and not even sorry about it.
her eyes widened as she realised not only was george staring dead at her, he was also drawing closer to her. everything inside her was telling her to run away, run away from this man who didn't even have the decency to reply to her messages, run away from this man who gave her such mixed signals she didn't even know if he loved or hated her. yet her feet seemed unable to budge, the alarm bells ringing in her head were not enough to sway her heart.
"if your mouth opens any wider, you'll dislocate your jaw," george chuckles, placing his drink down at the bar. "that's hilarious," y/n says in the flattest, most sarcastic tone she could manage. "what?" george quirks an eyebrow at her in genuine confusion, standing up and moving closer to her. "i said-" y/n began but abruptly stopped as george placed his hands on her hips and guided her towards the door.
"what are you doing?" y/n swore her heart stopped, how could the same man that had been ghosting her be so comfortable with touching her like that? did he not feel any shame? in a matter of moments, a rush of cold air washed over y/n as george led her out of the threshold of the bar, and it wasn't unpleasant. "the music was too loud, i couldn't hear anything you were saying," he said, walking over to some seating and gesturing for her to join him. y/n followed him and took a seat opposite him but stayed silent, she wasn't sure she wanted to speak to him, nor did she even know what to say.
"what brings you to the bar?" george asks, trying to alleviate some of the awkwardness. he genuinely did want to talk to y/n but wasn't sure how or what to say to her, so settling on a generic question like that seemed to be his best bet. "avoiding you actually," y/n almost laughs at the situation, she was also very aware that inside the bar there would be a confused bartender likely with a vodka coke ready for absolutely no one to receive, "but it seems you just appear and disappear as you please." now it was george that stayed silent for a moment, "i deserved that."
"too right, now if you'll excuse me, i have a drink waiting for me inside," y/n stands up to leave, she was not in the mood for this conversation. if george could easily ignore her for days on end then her leaving one conversation for another day would be more than reasonable. "wait y/n-" george stands up quickly and grabs her arm, "can you please hear me out?" genuine hurt could be heard in his voice, for a second y/n thought about just jumping into his arms and telling him she forgave him. that thought was only fleeting though, she decided to retain her dignity and just listen to what he had to say instead. this is for me, not him, she affirmed in her mind before turning back towards him, "fine."
"this might sound really stupid," george starts, "but it's true and i can't believe i am even about to say it." y/n nods hesitantly, she wasn't sure how he could make himself seem any more stupid. "i guess i'm not used to feeling this way, like," he pauses, "properly in love." y/n was dumbfounded, she opened her mouth to speak but no words would dare come out. "i got scared and tried to hide. and in the process hurt you," george looks at her with sad eyes, pleading her to say something. "what you're saying is that you couldn't reply because you love me? like love love me?" y/n could no longer hide her shock, in fact she was beginning to question if this was even actually happening. "i guess so?" george scratches the back of his neck nervously, "look, i'm sorry. i didn't intend to ghost you, i just didn't want to scare you by coming off too strong." he moves closer and tucks a stray strand of her hair behind her ear, "you're the first person i have been fully serious about." silence hung over them, y/n really did think for a second that she was going to pass out.
"i don't know if you are believing me," george sighs, defeated. "please say something." y/n tried to find her words, too much had just happened and she needed a moment to process it. the truth is she did believe him, she knew deep down all along that he was a good guy. "prove it." y/n says with a grin, "prove that you're as serious as you say you are." george raises an eyebrow at her sudden change of tone, "are you sure you can handle it?" a cocky smile forming on his face. "absolutely," y/n giggles, "do your worst."
without wasting another moment, george presses his lips to hers harshly. the kiss was hungry and desperate, like he had waited entirely too long to taste her again and he needed it. his tongue slips into her mouth, savouring every inch of it. this kiss was different, before they had been lustful, open mouthed, sloppy kisses - the kind that happened in the heat of the moment - but this kiss was so slow and so sensual and y/n could feel george pouring so much love into it that she felt it would be impossible to break apart from him.
george pulls away first to catch his breath. "is that enough proof?" he smirks, looking at her with blown out pupils, slightly swollen lips and pink dusting his cheeks. "i'm not sure, i might need a second one to confirm," y/n smiles cheekily, george rolls his eyes but bends down to lightly peck her on the lips. "there is more where that came from by the way," he laughs, "this just isn't the ideal setting."
"hopefully we can do this again sometime," she wiggles her eyebrows at him and laughs, "but we should really get inside, it's freezing," y/n ushers him back towards the entrance, "and i was supposed be back at my table with my friend's drink probably like half an hour ago." george's eyes widened, "oh god. she'll think you died en route or something!" truthfully, y/n was hardly worried about that, she knew her friends could be dramatic when they were drunk but she strongly doubted they were about to file a missing persons report or anything of the sort. "i'll just act naturally don't worry." she grins, "i'm good at that."
"yeah sure, really natural of you to spend an excessive amount of time staring at me from across the bar and then freeze up the second i moved towards you." george returns the grin, "seriously, i could literally feel your eyes boring into my skull."
"so dramatic, i did not stare that hard!" y/n gave him a light slap on the arm, she was in fact completely aware that that was exactly what happened, but she definitely didn't realise she had been that obvious. "whatever you say sweetheart," george opens the door for her and they step inside. y/n glances at the bar, the bartender hadn't made her drink but she hadn't expected him to, after all she had disappeared for a while. "stay right here, i'm going to order the drink again and go back to my friends for a bit." george simply nodded and took a seat at the bar once more, y/n opted to ask the other bartender for the drink this time (the one george had been talking to) - she thought it might be too awkward to ask the original one again.
drink in hand, she made her way back to their table, much more easily than when she first arrived. most people had begun to go outside to cool off so it wasn't nearly as packed in the booths where they were situated. "there you go." y/n pushed the drink towards the girl who had asked for it. "did you get lost on the way?" her friend giggles, slightly slurring her words. i'm sure she had a steady flow of drinks coming her way even without the one i ordered, y/n sighs, how was she going to explain this? it would've been even harder to explain her absence had she spent extra time outside mulling over what excuse to tell them but the lack of forethought also left her in a sticky situation. "you don't need to answer!" another of her friends grins almost evilly, "we can tell exactly what happened." y/n could feel her cheeks heating up, "what do you mean?" she answered, admittedly in a shakier voice than she was hoping for. without another word, the girl thrust her phone up at y/n's face with the camera open. "see?" she folded her arms and sat back in satisfaction.
"oh." y/n found that was the only word she was capable of uttering in that moment. her kiss with george had managed to smear her lip gloss and some of her lipstick around her lips in such a drastic way that it was painfully obvious what they had been doing. "for god's sake!" y/n quickly returned the phone and started in the direction of the bar where george, she assumed, would still be waiting for her.
"you didn't think to tell me about this?!" she hissed, gesturing broadly to her lips. george could only laugh, it had been only dimly lit outside of the bar so he wouldn't have been able to tell and y/n had taken off so abruptly with the drink that he hadn't even had a chance to fit a word in. "at least everyone knows now." george shrugs and gently holding her face and pressing the pad of his thumb over her lips, gently wiping away excess lip gloss (not much could be done about the coloured streaks of lipstick, at least not without a makeup wipe). y/n rolls her eyes, it was impossible to stay mad at him. "so much for twenty four hour ultra long wear lipstick," she grumbles. "shhh, i can't clean it up if you keep talking," george chuckles, giving her lips one final wipe, "there. all done."
"thank you," she smiles brightly, "i won't be buying this lipstick again that's for sure."
"you know," george pauses, "it would really be a shame if someone were to mess it up again,"
"save that for later!" y/n grins, giving him a kiss on the cheek instead before turning to go back to her friends. she could hear george protesting as she walked away, smiling to herself. this time she knew she would absolutely be hearing from him later.
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darlingdekarios ¡ 10 months ago
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until the stars leave.
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RATING: m for canon themes — LENGTH: 4,782 — Rolan x Tav [reader]
CONTENT: hurt/comfort, set shortly after the final fight, fluff, somewhat unspoken admission of feelings, first kiss, cuddles because they both earned them, brief indecent thoughts
when the celebrations are through a harsh realization sets in - with your companions returning home or answering to their new purpose and the city in ruin, you are alone with no where to go. as you wander in the night, your mind recalls a certain sentiment that was extended.
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Your heart had decided what it wanted before your mind had the chance to catch up, and your feet had carried you to the location you were drawn to - really, to the one place you felt was an option for you at the moment. At least, it was the safest and most comfortable option for you at a time like this, and the one you felt confident wouldn't turn you away.
Entering the main doors was hardly difficult - you'd picked up enough lock picking skills along the way to make quick work of the lock, slipping inside into the darkness around what walls and books remained and releasing a sigh of relief. The stairs you had to climb were familiar - a comfort in some way, at least.
What would happen when you stumbled through the portal? In all likelihood at this hour you'd enter the Tower to remain alone for several hours yet, until its new inhabitants woke for the new day. It didn't matter - you'd happily sleep amongst the books propped against the wall knowing you'd get through the night without any surprises.
But that wasn't quite fate's plan.
"Tav?"
Could his voice be considered a surprise when he was the Master of the Tower you'd snuck into? Could it be considering sneaking when you technically had an invitation - albeit not one specifically for tonight?
"Oh, hells," fell from your lips in surprise nonetheless, scrambling backward and into a stack of books until you fell flat on your ass. Your face burned as your mind wrapped itself around the situation, huffing out a deep breath as you fought your way on pained bones and muscles to your feet again.
"What are you doing here?" he questioned, rising from where he sat atop a throne made of books to walk closer to you, meeting you where the ceiling allowed the moon to illuminate the two of you. "Is everything alright?"
"Everything's…fine," you breathed out again, reaching upward to remove your headwear and view him completely unobstructed. Your stomach fluttered at the sight of him - the bruises from Lorroakan had faded more since you'd seen him in-person last, something that brought a light smile to your face. It was easier to focus on the freckles that decorated his skin when you weren't distracted by hatred for his former "teacher." “Cal said I had a room here…anytime. And well, I don't quite think he meant at this hour but…”
“Of course you do, there's no question about that in the slightest," his expression was still perplexed, eyebrows furrowed together with one slightly raised as he continued to await any answer you were willing to provide.
Not that you'd intended it, but his careful - and clearly caring - scrutiny made your eyes start to water, one of your shaking hands quickly lifting to wipe away a tear just as it fell. Your voice was meek but you tried to maintain the level of sass and confidence he was used to hearing from you - as you spoke, you were certain it was hardly a convincing performance.
"Only if you don't mind, Master of Ramazith Tower."
He tried to smile his signature grin but his mind focused too hard on you using such a title for him, his cheeks burning several shades of red darker. He cleared his throat and averted his gaze quickly to re-center himself, though it was probably a laughable effort.
"Are you alright?" his voice was just as gentle as you'd needed it to be, your appreciation growing with each word. "You don't even look like you've been healed an-"
“I am…alone. My family is scattered to return to their lives and I'm…"
The words had slipped out before you could stop them, this level of vulnerability and amount of sharing with the Wizard Tiefling entirely new - territory much better explored with a clearer mind and healthier body. Inwardly you worried even that was too much emotion between the two of you for the type of relationship - if you could even call it that - the two of you had maintained up to now.
Another surprise for the night - his eyes were only incredibly understanding as he shakes his head in your direction, dispelling your feelings in the politest way possible.
“You're not alone. Obviously."
There was that agitation in his voice you knew had nothing to do with you. Rolan, complicated man as he was and growing more so by the day it seemed, was not one to share his feelings, few exceptions being made throughout his hardened life. But the truth was undeniable in that single word - four syllables that told you everything you needed to feel more at peace tonight in knowing you were wrong.
You have me.
It was silent - it was all you needed.
Your lip began to quiver again as another tear fell, but this time it was his hand raising to catch it on your cheek, his hands soft and warm and delicate in all the ways you'd dreamed they would be…far more times you were willing to admit. He hadn't thought about the movement before it was carried out, yet he couldn't bring himself to regret it, savoring the way your head seemed to lean toward his touch more.
When was the last time you'd been touched in comfort…in need? Had it been just as long as it had for him? He found it was hard to pull his hand away from the softness your cheek presented beneath his thumb.
“You’ve been through quite a lot recently,” he removed his hand as he spoke again and you immediately wished he'd return it, that you could continue to memorize the feeling. You focused your attention instead on his eyes, falling even harder as you gazed into his eyes. You found only honesty met you in those yellow flames. “You’ve always been here for us…for me. My home - and everything in it - is yours. For as long as you need it."
"I didn't help you to be owed a favor," you reminded, always the one to ensure everyone around you knew they owed you nothing. "Thank you."
"Only you could just save the world and feel you're not owed anything," there was a subtle laugh to his voice that you were happy to hear - that you were certain you'd never been gifted with before and eager to hear much more in the future. "When's the last time you ate?"
Just the word made your stomach growl - it'd been a while, that much was clear.
"We donated our leftover supplies," your answer was hardly a real answer and yet that told him exactly what he needed to know - whatever the truth was it was completely unsatisfactory. He sighed in response, shaking his head slightly as he reached upward to pinch the bridge of his nose briefly in frustration - it only meant he cared.
"Unsurprising," he breathed out, returning his gaze to yours again when he removed his hand from his face. His tone offered no chance of argument. "I'll show you to a bath, and I'll find something for you to eat and wear while you're in-"
His tone offered no chance of argument, yes - but that still wouldn't stop you from trying.
"I'd be okay not eating. You don't need to go out of your way."
His eyes narrowed and he shook his head again, though you could see the hints of amusement at your usual heroic antics flickering in his eyes. You'd starve if it meant you didn't inconvenience someone else. He was hardly going to let that happen, and he was more than willing to repeat himself to you after the interruption - but likely only just the once.
"I'll show you to a bath, and then I'll find something for you to wear and something for you to eat," his tone was more assertive now, dominant - you couldn't deny the way it made your mouth go slightly dry and your palms sweat. "Take your boots off at least, I can't have you tracking…whatever it is on them all over the Tower."
You nodded in agreement knowing he wouldn't agree to anything else now that his mind was made up, beginning to lower yourself down to the ground. Your weary bones were struggling from fatigue and you ended up falling into a heap on the floor instead. He was quick to follow you, dropping to his knees at a speed you knew would result in a bruise, one of his arms coming out to support you.
You thanked him by looking at him like he'd answered a prayer, an expression he'd refer back to frequently. For now, however, he was too focused on your condition to fully appreciate the sweet moment for as long as it deserved.
"Gods," he spat, clearly not in your direction whatsoever - as if he could ever truly feel that anger at you. "I suppose none of your friends could perform healing."
"It seemed selfish to ask at a time like-"
"Just…stop," he sighed out again, waving his free hand in the air to dismiss your piss poor explanation - unwilling to hear the excuse he knew was reasonable and yet didn't bring him comfort. "There is such a thing as being too heroic. I hope the next time you're faced with saving the world you remember that."
"I hope there isn't a next time."
The confession came fast and took him by surprise - he offered an understanding nod and the briefest rub to your lower back where he still held you. He began to remove your armor, gently pushing your hands away when you tried to help. Any amount of relaxation he could offer you now he would without being asked, if he knew it was acceptable.
"Why are you awake at this hour, anyway?"
Your voice was soft and much less upset as you just watched him care for you, trying to navigate the conversation away from yourself. His eyes flickered up into yours again as he worked the laces on your sides free, fingers brushing over the thin fabric covering your sides gently.
You were touch starved and it was hard to ignore - in the way that every cell in your brain was screaming with the desire to hold his hand. You were hopeful the conversation could distract you before you made your desires known.
"I have a lot on my mind," he confessed, placing what had covered your torso to the side. You could see the conflict in his eyes returning and growing, whatever his mind had trailed to as he came up with an answer disturbing the peace that had fallen over the two of you. "I'd like things to be normal for a long time, whatever normal looks like now, but…"
It was your turn to nod in understanding as he removed your gauntlets, fingers lightly brushing against your arm as the skin was exposed. Goosebumps raised where his fingers touched, a fact that he didn't miss. He wondered briefly if it was the reaction he'd get from any part of your body he touched.
"But? Something else worth sharing?"
He had to lie…
"I'm afraid not."
But unfortunately he wasn't very good at it.
"If it's from your mind, it's worth sharing."
Such a compliment took him off guard momentarily, his eyes widening with genuine surprise as he allowed them to soak in, hoping he'd remember how that sentence sounded from your lips forever. It was impossible to lie when faced with the weakness of his intellect being appreciated, especially when it was by you.
"I worried it would be a long time before I got to see you again."
With his confession of the truth both of your faces heated up - his face turning shades of red that only seemed to make him glow. It made both of you feel silly, this giddiness which neither of you were particularly good at hiding at the moment. He helped you to your feet again as you made a mental note of the subtle flick to the tip of his tail.
Being a little bashful wouldn't stop you from flirting with him altogether. It was far too tempting to tease him just a little more.
"So that's what keeps the Wizard of Ramazith's Tower awake at night," your tone was light and playful and he was thankful you were able to diffuse the tension with your personality. He wasn't certain if his efforts to flirt had ever been even remotely successful in the past with others, but he was becoming increasingly hopeful they might work with you.
"It's what was keeping me awake tonight. Who's to say what tomorrow will bring?"
Your eyes flashed with surprise that Rolan was capable of flirting in such a way and found you could only smile, his heart fluttering at the sight. Behind him his tail twitched again, and he quickly moved to ensure you weren't catching onto the quirk. An arm gently slipped around your waist as he began to lead you to the bathroom where the promise of a relaxing bath waited for you. On the way, you still wanted to fill the silence.
"Are you going to tell Cal and Lia?" you questioned, realizing quickly you needed to clarify. Forming a concise question proved to be difficult when you were becoming intoxicated by the smell of him that was flooding your senses at this proximity. "That I'm here."
"Of course I am, but in the morning. Tonight you need to rest."
You nodded in agreement and remained at his mercy as you made your way to the destination he'd chosen for you. The bathtub filled before your eyes with a simple wave of his hand, a smug expression forming on his face as you looked on in wonder despite all you had seen in the recent weeks. Reaching for a shelf he walked beside the tub to empty several vials of herbs, once again waving his hand so some of the candles decorating the room flickered to life.
When he turned to face you he realized all that was left was for you to remove the rest of your clothes…the thought alone returned the blush to his face. This time, however, it was joined by several beads of sweat breaking out across his brow, his hand raising to rub the back of his neck as he nervously cleared his throat.
"I'll find you some clothes," he announced, trying to maintain the composure in his voice. "And food."
And like that he was gone, disappearing in a flash to remove himself from any further opportunity of indecent thought.
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The bath alone did you wonders in returning your body to a somewhat lucid state, though you still stumbled when you raised yourself from the relaxing waters. A simple robe in a shade of blue he so regularly wore awaited you on the vanity, which you dressed into slowly to ensure you didn't have any accidents.
It felt odd to dress for the day and not cover yourself in as much powerful armor as possible - even odder not to grab a weapon. You were thankful for the oddity.
An illusionary duplicate of himself waited outside the bathroom door to direct you to your next location - you weren't surprised at all to find Rolan hadn't bothered with giving it much of a script beyond what was necessary. Still, you found your mind focused on all the power he was displaying - Rolan became more impressive by the day, more powerful and capable of caring for himself and his family.
How very lucky Cal and Lia were to have someone in their lives like him.
You found him in the kitchen, amused at the flustered expression on his face as he plated whatever he'd whipped together - for the two of you it seemed, judging by the matching plates in front of him. With a pop his mirror image disappeared and Rolan's head lifted to meet your gaze, both of you smiling just at being reunited again, though it'd hardly been long since you separated.
(In fact, this would become a trend for the two of you very soon - minutes would feel like hours, hours like days, days like eternity until soon you'd find being apart at all was unbearable. When that day came for the both of you, you would hardly be far from his side again.)
He'd made a simple meal for you - something he somewhat bashfully admitted he used to make for Cal and Lia when the three of them were growing up. As you ate together in comfortable silence you decided it was the best meal you'd ever been made, and one you would ask for again whenever you needed an excuse to see Rolan.
Not that you truly needed an excuse.
Thankfully, it was still dark when it was time to retire to bed for the night, something you were already hoping you could manage despite everything that was still on your mind. As he escorted you to the room you'd sleep in he offered a quick explanation knowing there was an argument to be had when he'd finished.
"You'll sleep in my room tonight, and I'll take the spare bed in Cal's room," his words were coming quick in the hopes that your exhausted mind would have trouble keeping up with them, intentions pure as he hoped you would just allow him to extend this kindness. "Tomorrow we'll be sure one of the other rooms is furnished to your liking."
"You don't need to go to all of this trouble for me."
The genuine offense that passed his features at your phrase was chased quickly by annoyance, his eyes narrowing again as he imparted his next words onto you.
"You've gone through far more for me. Please."
He opened the door and motioned you inside fluidly, following after you to light the fireplace with the wave of his hand, providing more light to the dark room. Even in the dim environment you could see his bed looked oh-so-inviting…despite the books that littered the top of it. Realizing the mess he rushed forward to begin moving them, shooting you a grateful look when you joined. A gentle brush of your hands together as you both reached for the last book caught both of you off-guard, his movements entirely freezing at the feeling of your skin against his again.
In the privacy of his bedroom, there was something about the touch that just felt more meaningful than anything that had come before it.
"Sorry about the mess," he quickly filled the silence with an apology before he got too lost in your hopeful eyes, before he thought too long on how exhausted you must be after everything. "You should be plenty comfortable here for the night."
You nodded in agreement and climbed into the bed, quietly moving to the opposite side and finding comfort in the first position you found yourself in. Taking in a deep breath you continued to gaze up at him, mind running through a million options as to what to do now and hoping he could see your desire written in your eyes.
Instead, he took a step back as if to leave.
"I'll see you later this afternoon, I hope, after you've gotten plenty of rest," his voice was quieter as he was conscious of you entering a relaxed state, truly hopeful it wouldn't be long before you were asleep. "Goodnight."
But as sweet as it was, it wasn't what you wanted.
"Wait," you called, reaching out to grab at his arm before he was too far away. He turned to look over his shoulder, a puzzled look on his features bringing a small smile to your own. A smile - a genuine smile. How very good it felt to do so without guilt again. "Stay…please? It's just…quiet. So quiet in my mind since the parasite is gone. I don't like feeling so…alone."
Thankfully, he'd never make you beg. He simply nodded and rubbed the back of his neck, breathing out deeply as he mentally talked himself into remaining calm - sleeping in a bed together was hardly something to get all worked up over.
"I suppose I will sleep much better knowing you are."
For as nervous as he now felt, he was thankful he was still managing to form coherent and articulate sentences. He was still living through the embarrassment of tripping over his words in front of you the first time you'd met.
"Then please.""
Eager to ensure you didn't have to repeat the plea again he only gave in to your desire, climbing into the bed next to you and trying not to feel overwhelmed by your scent flooding his senses. He stayed on his back for a moment deciding it was for the best as he decided exactly what he wanted to do - what the best way to continue the night was.
What didn't take much thought was the feeling that crackled in the air around the two of you, an undeniable mutual want drawing the two of you nearer. And yet, neither of you knew how to seize the moment that was presented to you, new worries taking root in your minds.
He was so thankful when you were the one to break the eilsnce.
"You said you worried it would be a long time since you saw me again."
"Yes, I did."
"Why did that worry you?"
"I suppose…"
His response trailed off as he elected to consider his words carefully, taking a moment to form them in his brain to ensure they were exactly what he wanted. No words - even magical ones - would ever be enough, and even if they were he was hardly the type of man willing to express them.
But for you? He'd do whatever h could manage.
"I suppose I am quite fond of you," he breathed out, admitting to himself inwardly that it did feel good to finally admit it aloud. "Though I find your heroics insufferable and wish desperately that you could practice a little more selfishnesses quite a bit more often, I…enjoy your company. I did not want to go long without it."
He was certain he'd chosen the right words when his eyes found your face again, greeted with the sight of complete and utter adoration. It had been a long time since someone had looked at him this way - it was instantly a sight he wanted to see forever.
"I was selfish…after the battle," you explained, biting at your lip nervously - a habit he found quite cute, no matter how many times he'd reprimand you in the future for it. "Everyone offered me a place beside them. I could be helping in so many places - I had so many choices."
He waited for you to continue your story, understanding that something like this may take extra time. If there was anyone that deserves it, it was you.
"I chose to stay in Baldur's Gate."
He could feel that you were burning beside him - your temperature had easily spiked. Were you embarrassed at such a confession? He hardly thought admitting to stay in the city warranted such a fuss, though he also wasn't going to be one to shut you down.
"No doubt you'll be detrimental to the city's rebuilding efforts."
"I intend to be, but that's not why I chose to stay," you offered a light smile and released a shaky breath before you continued with your confession to him, glad you could get it out now and that the suit hadn't died alongside you. "I chose to stay…for you, Rolan. To be near you. I wasn't ready to…to move on."
The realization washed over his face like a wave and he was very aware that he was burning now, unable to stop the smile that spread across his features - or the fact that he'd been moving closer throughout the lunch.
"It seems my worries were matched by your own."
He was mocking you playfully, in a way that only he was truly capable of. You adored when he was in a mood like this. If he was in the mood to flirt, you were more than happy to oblige.
"I'd love to not worry myself over you someday, Rolan."
"And I you," he agreed with a nod, his handsome smile still covering his features. It was lighthearted and peaceful yet serious and intense - you'd happily go mad trying to understand all the different sides to him. "Do you think that day will come?"
"Perhaps if we watch one another," you offered, knowing you had no intent of removing yourself from his side anytime soon if no one forced it. "Every day, to be safe."
Slow movement caught your vision from the corner of your eye as one of his hands reached up to cup your face in one hand, cutting what the conversation could've blossomed into short. Your joking expression melted away into serenity once again masked with bashfulness. You were nervous at what his next move was - you bit at your bottom lip to prove it. He adored seeing you behave so…smitten?…for him and couldn't resist the opportunity for more.
"I am so glad you are here," he breathed out deeply, unwilling to mask his thoughts from you anymore, feeling already that he'd wasted enough time. "That you chose this. That your decisions lead you here, to me. I wouldn't trade this moment for anything."
Your own hand joined his, laying atop his as your eyes fluttered shut. You held his hand against your face as you moved closer, propping yourself up on one elbow. When you were certain you'd be greeted with the exact sight you wanted you opened your eyes, taking in the sight of him gazing up at you patiently, waiting for whatever word you'd offer him next.
"You're quite a prize for saving the world.""
"And I haven't even thanked you properly," his thumb brushed across your bottom lip slowly, his hand then slipping to the back of your head to pull you downward, closer to him. Your faces were mere inches apart, the anticipation of a kiss waiting to be claimed growing by the second. "May I?"
It was a quick nod you offered that was barely finished before he was claiming your lips in his own. It was the sweetest, most delicate and heartfelt kiss you'd been given in your life thus far, all-consuming and addicting immediately. You pressed closer to him as you lost yourself in the kiss, singularly focused on how perfectly his lips moved with yours to the point his tail winding around one of your legs went fairly unnoticed.
The two of you only pulled away from air, both of you immediately breaking into a small fit of giggles, nuzzling your noses together in pure joy. As you laid your heads back down on the edges of your pillows so you could remain close you gazed upon one another with an adoration that could go unspoken for now - your shared devotion was perfectly clear. Your hands found each other between your bodies and he placed his atop yours in silence, enjoying the first true peaceful moment in so long for a moment, reminding himself it wasn't selfish to stop and appreciate you - particularly at this hour.
His tail released your leg to drape over your waist instead, pushing you closer to his form until you were burying your face in his neck. The warmth and his scent combined with how one of his arms also wrapped around you gently was lulling you to sleep before you'd even found the perfect position. Though really, any position with Rolan would be perfect in your mind.
"Goodnight, sweet hero."
You were already asleep, his hopeful sentence gone unheard by yours ears as the exhaustion finally overtook you and you succumbed to the comfort of resting beside him. Waving an arcane lock toward the door to ensure the two of you would go uninterrupted for as long as he could keep you in the bed.
The world and all its troubles could be forgotten awhile while the two of you found tranquility in your shared solitude - and neither of you would have it any other way.
masterlist. baldur's gate III masterlist.
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babyleostuff ¡ 1 year ago
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my favourite person | joshua hong
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prompt | i'm not a lot of people's favourite person
word count | 1.3k
genre | angst & (mostly) fluff
author's note | ugh i haven't written a longer fic like this in a while, i've missed this
Joshua was that type of person who never wanted to bother you with his own problems. He cherished you and your happiness way too much, so what would be the point in sharing his own worries with you?
He was a big boy, he could take care of himself, no matter how much he wanted to find peace and comfort in your arms.
You knew something was wrong, despite him insisting he was fine. You knew him like the back of your hand and something has been clearly bothering him.
His bright smile was gone and even if he did smile, it didn’t reach his eyes, like it usually did. He didn’t share any funny stories from the practice room, he went to bed without giving you your mandatory good night kiss and you woke up to his side of the bed cold and empty.
“Joshua, you really have to tell me if anything is bothering you,” you said and squeezed his arm. “I’m here for you.”
But the only response you got was a small smile and a “I’m fine darling. Don’t worry about me,” which didn’t make the case any better.
You decided to let it go and wait for him to come around. Especially, because he had a company dinner soon, which you hoped would cheer him up a bit.
Perhaps a talk with Jeonghan or Seungcheol wouldn’t hurt as well.
Leaving with a quiet goodbye and a kiss to your forehead (like he always did before leaving), made you hopeful you were slowly getting your Shua back.
Some of the boys posted a couple of pictures of them together, before the party even began and Joshua was in every single one of them.
He seemed fairly happy, but you knew very well he could have been pretending.
Nonetheless, you decided to put your phone away, there was no point in dwelling on whether he was fine or not.
He wouldn’t be coming back to your apartment tonight anyways, he never did after big parties. He was always afraid that he’d make too much noise and wake you up, so he always went back to his own place after a night of drinking.
Settling down for the night, you unawarely stroked the pillow on your boyfriend’s side, where his head would usually be. He had never told you this, but his heart always skips anytime you run your fingers through his hair, as a warm feeling settles in his tummy.
He was always convinced that love was an emotion that he’d never be able to describe, but the genuine care in your eyes and the happiness in your smile could make him talk about love for hours.
“Fuck.”
You tiredly rubbed your eyes with your (Joshua’s) sweatshirt, trying to pick up where the sounds were coming from, while still being half asleep.
You stumbled out of bed, not so gently running into your dresser, while trying not to freak out over a thief who's probably robbing your apartment right now.
Finally, reaching the kitchen, you exhaled in relief as you saw that it was only your boyfriend, trying to take off his shoes.
But then you realised something. Why was he here? And then you realised something else.
He was definitely not sober.
Seeing your boyfriend drunk was nothing new, but seeing him wasted was something you thought you’d never get to see.
“Honey, are you okay?” you asked, quickly grabbing his hand to get his attention. You couldn't help thinking that something bad had happened, as his eyes were wide and he seemed almost… scared?
Shaking his head, he clumsily grabbed your other hand, putting them on his cheeks.
For a second you thought about calling Jeonghan. You’ve never seen your boyfriend in such a miserable state before and it was scaring you. The light in his eyes was gone and his beautiful face showed nothing but pain.
Nothing about this was good, but the worst was that you still had no idea what had happened.
As you got lost in your own thoughts, you felt something wet hitting your fingertips and that was when you realised Joshua was crying.
“Oh baby,” you whispered, as he collapsed into your arms. His sobs echoed through your quiet apartment, while his shoulder shook with every breath he took.
He held tightly onto you, almost as you were his lifeline - the only thing keeping him alive. Your own heart was breaking with every cry that he let out, the sound shattering any ounce of hope that you had that he’d be all right.
You lowered both of you to the ground, so you could sit in the dark curridor, illuminated only by the moonlight coming through the window.
Taking a shaky inhale, he put his head on your lap, while you gently stroked his head and placed small kisses on his forehead, to let him know that you were there with him.
“I’m not a lot of people’s favourite person.”
The not so comforting silence of your apartment was finally broken by your boyfriend, who seemed to have calmed down, even though he still struggled to take a deep breath.
“What did you say honey?” you said quietly, brushing his hair away from his face.
“I think I’m not a lot of people’s favourite person,” he repeated, slowly pushing himself up to seating.
You looked at his tired expression, wanting nothing more to take all of his burdens away from him.
He was usually very good at avoiding the hate he got online, but from time to time, it could really get to him. It was unavoidable, you both knew that, but sometimes he wanted nothing more but to talk to his fans and have a good time with them.
But because a lot of people want to harm him, his reputation and his feelings, it wasn’t easy to manoeuvre between the good and the bad comments.
It seemed like this time he stumbled upon some really nasty shit.
“Why do you say that? Where did it come from?” you asked rhetorically, voice laced with concern.
He didn’t respond, only put his head on your shoulder, putting all of his weight onto you.
Not wanting to dig deeper, you put your arms tightly around his shoulders, and placed one of your hands on his tear stained cheek.
“You know,” you muttered so as not to startle him. “You might not be a lot of people’s favourite person, but you’re definitely my favourite person,” you kissed the side of his head, as you felt more tears rolling down his cheek.
“I have no idea how you’re feeling right now, nor will I ever get to experience what you’re experiencing, but I want you to know that despite all those horrible people that want to cause nothing more but pain, there are thousands of people who love you and cherish you.”
“Take a look around you. You have me, you have your brothers and you have your true fans that want you to be happy,” you whispered into his hair.
“I think that’s more than enough,” he said quietly, lifting his head to look at you.
His eyes were red, but to you they were the happiest they’ve been in a while. Even the corners of his lips were slightly turned upwards, to which you couldn’t help but smile.
“You cannot make everyone happy, Shua. There are going to be people that’ll want to hurt you, but remember that you’re always surrounded by people that love you,” you said.
He turned away to wipe his wet cheeks, feeling slightly embarrassed about his emotional outburst.
Usually, he’d go to his own apartment and cry himself to sleep, but tonight something made him come back home to you.
“Joshua,” you put your hand on his shoulder. “Next time, please talk to me before it gets that bad. I know that you don’t want to burden me with your worries, but I can't stand seeing you like this.”
“I love you so much, and I want us to go through the good and the bad together.”
He nodded and took your hand in his.
“Together.”
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steddieas-shegoes ¡ 6 months ago
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Congrats on 3K followers, which you so deserve! My request is because The Hold Steady's song "Stuck Between Stations" is stuck in my head and the lyric is, shockingly, "Tonight it's like he's stuck between stations". Have a wonderful writing weekend!
Thank you so much! I decided to take this super literally and do something a little silly. Hope you enjoy!
➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰
The train was late, but what else is new?
Eddie watched the board as the estimated arrival time kept going up. He’d have to text Elliot to let him know he’d be late for their appointment.
At least Elliot was a regular client of his and would understand.
Eventually, only 18 minutes late, the train arrived.
Eddie shoved through the crowd to get on, not even caring if he had to stand sandwiched between sweaty people as long as he got to his shop.
By some miracle, he managed to get the only empty seat left at the back of the car.
And it was next to possibly the hottest guy he’d ever seen.
He was wearing tight jeans and a polo, glasses, a nose ring, and his hair was perfectly mussed. Eddie was such a sucker for the preppy hipster look. It never turned out well for him, but dammit if he didn’t try anyway.
“Mind if I sit?” Eddie asked the guy.
“Nope,” he replied, not even looking up from his phone.
He was furiously typing something, and Eddie was doing his best to not read anything.
But it sure was difficult and Eddie had pretty good eyesight and also never learned manners.
It’s not even that she left me for someone else. She tried to say that my coming out as bi ruined our relationship. Our relationship was ruined way before that! And she knew saying that would make me feel like shit so-
“Am I entertaining you?” The guy said from next to him.
Eddie startled and looked up, right into the warmest brown eyes he’d ever looked into.
“Sorry. It kinda seemed like you were working on a novel. I’m an avid reader.”
The man snorted and put his phone face down on his leg. “I’m Steve. You should at least know my name if you’re gonna know my business.”
“Eddie. I am sorry. Even more sorry your ex was clearly a piece of shit,” Eddie nudged his shoulder with his own.
The train started moving and Eddie glanced up at crowd of people in the car.
“Yeah, well. It was bound to happen. I wanted to settle down, she wanted to travel and focus on her career. Would’ve never worked,” Steve sighed. “Onto the next!”
Eddie snorted. “How long were you together?”
“Three years.”
“Ouch.”
“It was coming for a while,” Steve shrugged. “I feel like I mourned the relationship while I was still in it. Plus, she moved in with her new boyfriend, so it’s only a matter of time before I move in with mine.”
Eddie felt a weird pain in his chest. “Oh, you’ve got a boyfriend?”
Steve smirked at him. “Not yet.”
The train slowed and then came to a stop. The usual announcement for the next station didn’t start. Instead, an announcement let them know they were experiencing a short delay.
Eddie groaned and let his head hit the window next to him.
“I’m sure my shoulder is more comfortable than the window.”
Eddie’s head shot up at Steve’s suggestion.
Steve was blushing, looking down at his phone like he hadn’t even spoken. Maybe he hadn’t. Maybe Eddie imagined it.
“If you want. The last short delay took 25 minutes,” Steve continued, finally looking over at Eddie with a small smile.
“I have to let my client know I’m gonna be even later,” Eddie pulled his phone from his pocket to send another text. It may not go through underground, but at least he could say he tried.
“Client? Are you a therapist?”
“Close. Tattoo artist,” Eddie finished up the text and put his phone back in his pocket.
“Oh, my friend Will is a tattoo artist! He keeps telling me to get something, but I’m not the biggest fan of needles.” Steve looked apologetic. “I’m worried I’d pass out.”
Eddie was already planning exactly what he’d tattoo on Steve’s body.
“You’d be surprised how many people I tattoo who don’t like needles. Is it a pain thing or just the needles in general?”
“Both? I guess?” Steve was slowly leaning closer to Eddie’s side.
“Well, the pain is easy. I have a numbing cream I recommend to first timers or people getting something done in an especially sensitive spot that works great.” Eddie let his arm rest across the back of the seat, skin brushing against Steve’s back. “The other part is a little harder, but usually I go the old school distractions method.”
“Like a toddler with a shot?” Steve laughed.
“Exactly! I play music they like or put on a show they wanna watch. Sometimes we just talk the whole time. Sometimes they prefer to just close their eyes and pretend they’re somewhere else. Everyone’s different.”
Eddie watched Steve soak in that information. He technically didn’t take walk-ins anymore except for special events, but he’d be willing to have Steve in his chair right after Elliot’s appointment. He’d stay late. He’d do it for free if it meant having his hands on Steve’s skin.
“Have you ever had someone leave before it’s done?”
“Twice,” Eddie nodded. “Once was a drunk guy who insisted he was sober enough to do the tattoo and halfway through, he threw up and then just walked out. Don’t know if he ever bothered to get it done. The other was a woman who had chosen her ribs as her first tattoo ever. Don’t ever do that, by the way. Not a great start. She quit on the second word of the lyrics she was getting.”
Steve snorted. “What were the lyrics?”
“I hate to say it, but I don’t remember. I’m sure she regrets even trying all the time.”
Steve laughed again and leaned his head on Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie let his arm wrap around Steve’s shoulder and squeeze.
“So? You gonna get one? Did I convince you?” Eddie said quietly. He didn’t want to ruin this moment between them, stuck between stations for the foreseeable future.
“Hm. I’ll consider it. Do you have room on your books for me?” Steve turned his face into Eddie’s shirt.
“I’m sure I can make room for you, sweetheart.”
“Sweetheart already? What a sweet talker you are,” Steve mumbled against his shoulder.
“I read people pretty well and you are a sweetheart. No doubt about it.”
Steve groaned. “Are you always like this?”
“Not at all.”
Something in Eddie’s voice must have sounded genuine. Steve looked up at him, his face close enough to Eddie’s to feel his breath.
“This is kind of crazy.”
“What is?”
“This. I feel safe here with you. I’m ready to let you give me a tattoo even though I hate needles.”
Eddie’s fingers traced patterns along his upper arm, mindlessly planning out a tattoo already.
“Could give you one right here,” Eddie tapped his bicep. “Something small, dainty linework, a sunflower maybe.”
“A sunflower? Isn’t that kinda feminine?” Steve’s fingers were tracing a pattern on Eddie’s thigh. “Not that I’m against it because of that, it just doesn’t seem to fit me.”
And maybe yeah, if Eddie thought about it, he could see how Steve’s body type was thicker, muscular, closer to jock than city hipster living off of coffee and cigarettes. Flowers might not be the first thing someone would think of when looking at Steve.
But when talking to him, when seeing how soft he got with an arm around him, how he turned into the affection, it was pretty obvious he should be covered in delicate work.
He deserves delicate things, Eddie could already tell.
He wanted to give him that.
He wanted to give him anything.
“Someone as radiant as you needs something that represents that. Anytime you’re ready,” Eddie couldn’t help the kiss he pressed to the top of Steve’s head.
The short delay turned into a long delay, but Steve and Eddie talked the entire time. When they finally got moving, Steve stayed on even though the next station was his stop.
“Think I’d like this tattoo artist to take my tattoo virginity,” Steve smirked at him as the train started moving again.
“As long as you’re okay sitting through my appointment first. Might get boring.”
“Doubt being near you could ever be boring.”
Getting stuck on the train with Steve turned into barely leaving his side for weeks, months, years.
Nothing felt as natural as being with his sunflower.
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shitsndgiggs ¡ 3 months ago
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kenan who ditches your date for his girl best friend (no cheating) and you wanted to tell him that you were pregnant. he comes to the place eventually and sees you left. he comes home, but you dump him. later, he sees you with a baby bump at the grocery store and idk just groveling kenan until you make up with him 💓 happy ending always 💓
REBUILDING US - KENAN YILDIZ
Kenan ditched your date
Kenan Yildiz x fem! reader
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I sat at our favorite restaurant, the one where Kenan and I had shared countless dinners, anniversaries, and even our first date.
Tonight was supposed to be special, a night to celebrate our love and to share the news that would change our lives forever.
I was pregnant, and I couldn't wait to see the look on Kenan's face when I told him.
But as the minutes turned into an hour, my excitement turned into worry, and then into disappointment.
I tried calling him, but his phone went straight to voicemail. My heart sank. I paid the bill and left, fighting back tears as I walked to my car.
____
Kenan rushed through the streets, his heart pounding with a mix of guilt and panic. He was late—so late that he feared Y/N might have already left.
He mentally kicked himself for getting caught up with Lara's issues, even though he genuinely wanted to help his friend.
But now, all he could think about was Y/N and how disappointed she must be.
As he finally arrived at the restaurant, he scanned the tables, searching for her familiar face. His heart sank when he didn't see her. He approached the hostess, his anxiety palpable.
"Excuse me," he said, his voice strained. "I was supposed to meet someone here, a woman named Y/N. Did she already leave?"
The hostess checked her reservation list, then looked up at him with sympathy. "Yes, she left about an hour ago. I'm sorry."
Kenan's shoulders slumped, and he muttered a thank you before turning to leave. He felt a heavy weight of regret pressing down on him. He knew he had messed up, and now he had to face the consequences.
When he got home, the silence was deafening. He called out for Y/N, but there was no response. He checked every room, his worry growing with each step.
Finally, he sat on the couch, burying his face in his hands. What had he done?
Days turned into weeks, and Kenan's attempts to reach out to Y/N were met with silence. He sent messages, left voicemails, and even sent flowers to her apartment, but she remained distant.
The pain of her absence was unbearable, and he couldn't shake the image of her disappointed face from his mind.
____
The grocery store felt like the last place I’d see Kenan. But as I turned a corner, there he was, standing right in front of me. My heart skipped a beat, and I froze, unsure of how to react.
"Y/N," he called out, his voice wavering as he approached me.
I turned to face him, my eyes widening in surprise. "Kenan," I said, my tone guarded. I instinctively rested my hand on my baby bump, feeling both protective and vulnerable.
He took a deep breath, his eyes locked on my belly. "I... I didn't know," he stammered, clearly shocked. "Why didn't you tell me?"
I felt a mix of sadness and anger. "I tried to, Kenan. That night at the restaurant, I was going to tell you. But you weren't there."
His face contorted with regret. "I'm so sorry," he said, his voice filled with remorse. "I was with Lara. She needed me, but I should have been with you. I made a huge mistake."
I looked down, my hand gently caressing my bump. "It's been hard," I admitted. "But I've managed. I'm doing what I need to for my baby."
Tears filled Kenan's eyes. "Please, let me be a part of this. I know I messed up, but I want to be there for you and our child. I'll do anything to make it right."
I hesitated, torn between the love I still felt for him and the pain he had caused me. "I need to know I can trust you," I said softly. "That you'll put us first."
"I promise," he said, his voice firm. "I love you, Y/N. I never stopped. And I want to prove to you that I'm committed to our family."
I looked into his eyes, searching for sincerity. "It's going to take time," I said finally, feeling my resolve waver. "But I don't know if I can trust you again. You hurt me, Kenan."
He looked devastated but nodded. "I understand. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust. Please, just give me a chance."
I took a deep breath, feeling the weight of the decision before me. "I need time," I said. "This isn't something that can be fixed overnight."
Kenan nodded again, his eyes filled with hope and determination. "I'll wait as long as it takes. I just want to be there for you and our baby."
As we walked out of the store together, I felt a mix of emotions. Part of me wanted to believe in his promises, to give him a chance to make things right.
But another part of me was still hurt, still wary of letting him back into my life.
Over the next few weeks, Kenan made good on his promise. He called and texted regularly, offering to help with anything I needed.
He attended doctor's appointments and helped set up the nursery. Slowly, my anger began to fade, replaced by a cautious optimism.
One evening, as we sat on the couch together, he reached for my hand. "I know I've put you through a lot," he said, his voice sincere. "But I want you to know that I love you, and I'm committed to being a good father and partner."
I looked into his eyes, feeling a warmth spread through me. "You've been trying," I acknowledged. "And it means a lot. But it's still hard for me to forget what happened."
"I understand," he said, squeezing my hand gently. "But I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. We can take it one day at a time."
A tear slipped down my cheek, and I nodded. "One day at a time," I repeated, feeling a glimmer of hope.
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duskrosecreatesstuff ¡ 4 months ago
Text
When Nature Calls
Astarion has learned that cold nights in the Elfsong are better with a warm Tiefling to curl up with. But when that warmth turns to heat, he's going to need Halsin's help to satisfy her desires.
Read on AO3
NSFW. Astarion/Halsin/Female Tiefling Reader. 3.8k words
CW: Heat cycles, Oral sex, Biting / Mating bites, Tiefling tail play, PiV Sex.
Astarion shifted against the warmth of his tieflings back.  He was no longer in his trance, but did not want to leave the warmth of their shared bed.  Some nights, the cold of his body didn't bother him.  Some nights, he wanted nothing more than to indulge in the heat being freely given.  And tonight, her body felt exceptionally warm, despite her only wearing a thin shirt and her underwear, and having wriggled out from the blankets.
He drifted a hand over her ribs and across her stomach, pulling her in close as he nuzzled his cold cheek against her shoulder, and her body responded, a slightly deeper breath, a shift of her hips against him.  Her tail drifted lazily over his thigh, wrapping over him with light pressure.  Astarion smiled against her skin.  He’d be content to stay like this until the new day woke her.
Moments passed, perhaps minutes, perhaps an hour? He wasn’t sure.  What he was sure of, was that her body was moving against him, a gentle movement of her hips against his.  He froze.  She had to be dreaming, surely?  This wasn’t in their current agreement.  He braced himself and tried to pull his hips away.  Her tail clenched and stiffened where it had wrapped around him.  Her body clearly had other ideas.  As he tried again to press himself away from her, he noticed her temperature had risen.  Where before she had been pleasantly warm to his touch, now she felt hot, almost feverish.  He frowned and put his hands on her hips, pushing hard.
Instead of moving away, her body writhed and rolled, changing position to face him, all without ever letting him go.  Her tail had a powerful grip on him, and he felt trapped.  As his panic started to rise, he hissed her name.  When that failed to wake her, he leaned over to bite at her ear.
*******
Your eyes opened to a sharp pain in your ear. As you roused yourself from your slumber, you noticed you had moved in your sleep, and were holding your vampire lover in a death grip, your thigh thrown over his, your tail wrapped tightly around his waist.  As you met his deep crimson gaze, a wave of lust washed over you, and you realised with dismay, that you had awoken to your heat cycle starting.  And starting hard.  
In a flash, you pulled away, scrambling backwards across the bed, tugging your shirt down over yourself, and dragging your tail off his body.
“Shit!” you gasped out. “Gods, Astarion, I’m sorry … I didn’t .. I’m sorry … shit!”
“What’s wrong?” he asked, puzzled.  He’d been on the brink of panic at how tightly you had been holding him, but now you were awake, he was more confused by your actions.
“I- “ you waved a hand vaguely, “this … I didn’t think …”
“Shhh, it’s alright.  Take your time.” He reached out to touch you reassuringly, but you flinched away.
“Don’t touch me!” You took a deep breath, then another, your shoulders shaking as you tried to hold back tears, your hands gripping your knees tightly to your chest.
“What is going on with you? Are you sick? You’re certainly feverish.  Should I get Halsin?”  he was babbling, partly with concern, partly to cover his fear at what could be happening to you.
“No! Nothing like that!  Hells …” you clenched your teeth.  “Actually … yes.  Please bring Halsin”
“Of course, you must need healing,” he muttered, sliding off the bed and walking quickly across the room.
You watched him go, waiting until the door closed to let the tears loose.  How could you have lost track of the timing so badly?  You had been sure you had more time before you were going to have make arrangements for this, that you had time to discuss this with Astarion, to warn him.  As you counted back the days, the only conclusion you could come to, was that you had to have been trapped on the nautiloid longer than you had originally thought.
You dropped your forehead to your knees, rocking gently, your tail switching against the blankets, clenching your thighs together as you waited for Astarion to return with Halsin.  It gave you the tiniest amount of relief, a bucket of water on the raging inferno of desire that was crawling over every inch of your skin.
You didn’t look up as you heard the soft click of the door opening, so you didn’t see the looks on the two men as your scent hit them.  But you did hear Halsin take a deep breath, followed by the soft rumble of his voice.
“Oak Father preserve us.”
“What is it?  Do you know what’s wrong with her?” There was a panicked urgency in the vampire’s usually smooth voice.  “Can you help her?”
“I do know.  She’s in her heat cycle, So technically, there’s nothing wrong with her, exactly.  Just … ” Halsin’s voice trailed off as he looked at you thoughtfully.
“Just what?” Astarion’s brows knitted as he tried and failed to recall anything about tieflings having heat cycles.  To be expected, he’d never spent much time with a living one before.
“Just that she’s going to be insatiable for the next few days.  As for helping her?  There’s no potion or healing spell for this.” Halsin huffed a gentle laugh.  “But I’d be delighted to help, if you’re both willing.”
You looked up at Astarion, your expression miserable, but your eyes dark with lust.  “I’m sorry.  I should have warned you.  The timing is terrible, given that you … we … aren’t … y’know…”  
“I know, love.  It’s alright.”  Astarion thought for a moment.  Now he knew what was going on, his worry subsided, and he felt calmer.  This was to do with sex, and in that, at least, he was in familiar territory.  He was back in control, his voice once again smooth and sensual.
“Do you want Halsin to help?”  He watched your response closely, your tail curling, a rush of your scent filling his nostrils, the little spike in your heartbeat that gave you away.
“Oh, you do, don’t you?  You’d like him to help scratch this itch of yours, wouldn’t you?”  Astarion purred, a wicked grin spreading across his face.   “And I could watch …”
“You’d want that?” you whimpered.
“To see my ferociously horny lover come undone on our druid friend?  My sweet, you have no idea how much I’d enjoy watching that.” 
“Really?” you panted softly, looking up at him.  You’d become adept at recognising when he was masking, and you saw no hint of that on his face.  Only certainty.  And desire.  He nodded.
“Really.” he said, softly.
“Close the door.” you gasped out.  Halsin moved across the room to secure the door, while Astarion climbed up onto the bed, manoeuvring himself to sit behind you.  He reached for your shirt, helping you to discard it, then pulled you back to lay against his bare chest, making sure he had a clear view down the length of your body, and once again savouring the warmth of your skin.  He was cautious of having his hips too close to your writhing tail.  He looked up as Halsin approached the bed.
“She’s all yours.”
Halsin smiled down at you, a somewhat predatory look in his eyes.  He could feel the scent of you waking all his most primal senses, could feel his bear stirring deep within him.  He took a deep breath to steady himself.
He reached for your soaked underwear, dragging the ruined fabric off your body and tossing it to the side.  As he knelt between your legs, he was aware of the tightness building in his own trousers.  Your lips parted as you watched him with lustful eyes, nodding to him when he met your gaze, spreading your thighs for him.
He took a brief moment to admire the mess your heat had already made of you, your dripping core shining in the dimly lit room. With a soft growl, he dipped down between your thighs, his tongue sliding easily between your swollen folds, lapping at you as if starved.  You sighed at the relief his touch was giving you, tilting your hips up to him, offering yourself to him, your tail drifting to stroke over his shoulders.  He took that as encouragement, plunging his tongue into you, as you moaned in pleasure.
“Oh, you’re enjoying that, aren’t you?” Astarion purred in your ear.  “Does our lovely druid have a skilled tongue?  Is he making you feel so, so good?” He stroked his hands down your arms, wrapping his arms around you, gently but firmly pinning your arms to your sides, as his hands moved to cup your breasts, pinching lightly at your already sensitised nipples, enjoying the soft sounds you were gasping out. He peered down over your shoulder, admiring the way your nipples stiffened between his fingers, watching as Halsin bobbed between your thighs, feeling your body quiver in response to their combined movements.  He knew your body well enough to recognise your signs.
“So close, already, my love?  Are you going to be a good girl, and come on his tongue?”
You whimpered, as Halsin took the hint in Astarion’s words, and slid a hand along your thigh, reaching to press tight circles over your clit with this thumb.  Your back arched as your body tensed, your walls clenching against his tongue, as he continued to lap your juices.  Astarion held you gently, as you trembled and panted against him.
Halsin looked up, wiping your slick from his chin with the back of his hand.  “That should take a little of the edge off.  Although she will no doubt want more.” he grinned.  “If you wish to indulge her too.”
Astarion smiled as he pressed a light kiss to the side of your neck, noticing a difference in the scent of your blood, a quick thought brushing through his mind as to how you might taste right now, but pushed that to the side as a stronger scent of you filled his nostrils at Halsin’s words.
“Would you like that, my love?  Do you want us both to touch you?” Astarion whispered into your ear. You nodded, humming in agreement, as he drifted a hand down over your quivering stomach.
“Good Gods.” he whispered as he reached between your thighs, and felt for himself just how dripping wet you were.  It was nothing to coat his fingers in your slick, and move the pads of his fingers to drift in lazy circles over your swollen clit.  You whimpered, pushing your hips up against him.
“Already wanting more? You greedy little thing.”  You tilted your face to glance back over your shoulder at him, grinning wickedly.  With your arms still held against your sides, you moved your tail to wrap around his wrist, pulling his hand harder against you.  His eyes went a little wide, he’d hadn’t considered the possibilities of your tail like this.  You used your tail to tug his hand lower, guiding his fingers to your dripping entrance.
Meanwhile, Halsin quickly removed his clothing and joined the two of you on the bed.  Astarion couldn’t resist taking a peek as the larger man disrobed, and it took all his remaining willpower to not make some comment about “Nature’s gifts”.
The bed dipped slightly as Halsin moved up alongside you, leaning over to kiss you hungrily, the taste of your own juices still on his tongue, as one of his large hands brushed over your nipple.  You whimpered into his mouth, your back arching as Astarion slipped a finger into you, pressing your breast hard into Halsin’s palm.  He pulled away from your lips, his head dipping to take your nipple between his lips, alternating sucking on it, and lapping at it with his tongue.  His hand stroked lightly over your thigh, joining Astarions between your thighs, and you moaned at the feel of them both working inside you - one thick and warm, the other cool and slender.
Astarion nipped lightly at your neck, as he slid his finger back out of you, gliding it up to your swollen clit with a featherlight touch.  It was quickly replaced by Halsin, who took the opportunity to drive a second finger into you, working you open.  You wailed as he curled them inside you, catching that spot that made you see stars.
“Shhh,” Astarion whispered in your ear. “You don’t want to wake everyone, do you?”  He slid his free hand up to cover your mouth, and you lewdly licked at his fingers.  He smirked.
“Oh, do I need to give you something to keep you quiet?”  He pressed two fingers into your mouth, and you sucked on them greedily, suggestively. Your hips bucked as the two men worked in tandem, and you rolled your neck, pressing your head back against Astarion’s shoulder, perfectly offering your neck to him.  He increased the friction on your clit, as he pressed his lips to the pulse in your neck, his teeth lightly grazing your skin. You gave a small nod, which was all the permission he needed, and you felt the sharpness of his fangs puncturing your skin, and the icy numbness that followed.  You felt his lips work against you, felt the rush of your blood as he sucked your life essence into his mouth.
The taste was intoxicating.  It was still very much the blood he adored, that revived him, that made him feel almost alive.  But there was something else, an added spice to it.  A few more quick circles of his fingers, and your body quivered once more, your keening muffled by the fingers in your mouth as you fell over the edge again, clenching hard around Halsin’s fingers, while Astarion tasted your ecstasy in your blood.
He pulled away, lapping gently at the puncture wounds, watching for the blood to stop flowing.  A tendril of green flowed from Halsin’s free hand, helping the marks to fade faster.
“You know, that might not have been a wise decision, Astarion.”  Halsin observed, with a smirk as he gently slid his fingers out from your swollen walls. 
“Hmm?”  Astarion licked his lips, swallowing the last drops.
“Her blood.  That might not have been wise.”   
Astarion leaned his head back, as he realised he felt warm, warmer than usual after drinking your blood.  And that heat was pooling between his thighs, in a way that was demanding his attention.  He groaned, angling his hips against where the base of your tail was moving, a light friction to relieve the building pressure in his trousers.
You felt him shift against you, and you swiftly realised what was going on.  Your blood, and all its pheromones, was now coursing through him.  He was feeling what you were feeling.  Your heat, your need, was now his, too.  You rolled off him, scrambling to your knees next to him.
“Astarion? Are you alright?” you gasped, frantically searching his face.  His eyes were shut, and he gave a soft moan, moving his hand to cover the stiffened ridge clearly evident through his soft camp trousers.  You couldn’t tell if that was a yes or a no.  You placed a hand on his chest.  
“I want to help, my love.”  You dragged your fingertips lower, placing your hand over his.  “May I?”  His eyes stayed closed as he nodded.  You pushed his hand out of your way, as you tugged at the laces of his trousers, pulling them open and freeing his cock from the restriction.  You reached for him with your hand, stroking the unusually warm skin, pre-cum already beading at the tip.
“Astarion?”
“Hmm?”
“Look at me, please.” He opened his eyes, meeting yours.  “I want to help.” you repeated, earnestly.  You bit your lip coyly, and smiled at him.  “I want to taste you. May I?”
He cupped your jaw in one hand, and you leaned in to his touch. 
“Yes.” He whispered.  “Please, yes.”  You smiled, lowering yourself onto all fours and crawling to position yourself with your head in his lap.  His fingers stroked into your hair as you leaned down to his lap, cautiously running the tip of your tongue along the rock hard length.
He gave a soft sigh at the gentle relief, and you let your tail drift over his leg, stroking along his thigh, as gentle and calming as you could.  You felt him relax, and you moved to press your lips to the smooth tip in a gentle kiss, wrapping the fingers of one hand around his shaft You parted your lips to swirl your tongue over the tip, catching and tasting the little droplets of pre-cum forming.
You felt the bed dip behind you, and Halsin’s warm hands pressed against your ass.  Your tail curled up at the touch, offering Halsin a full view of your dripping cunt.  You gave a muffled squeal as he brushed his thumbs against the underside of your tail, and you subconsciously moved your knees farther apart in invitation.
“Oh you filthy little thing!” Astarion gasped.  “Is this what you’ve dreamed of?  Having us both like this?”
Your lips quirked in a small smile.  If Astarion was talking dirty, you knew he was back in his comfort zone.  You moaned against him, as you felt Halsin’s thick cock sliding between your folds, becoming slick with your fluids
“My heart. I want more of you.  I want to give you more.”
You lifted your head to glance over your shoulder at him, and whispered a very needy “please”, arching your back to press your hips against him.  He gripped the base of your tail as you turned back to take Astarion deeply into your mouth, felt him line himself up with your slick entrance, felt him tugging on your tail as he pushed slowly into you, his shallow thrusting pushing deeper and deeper into you, and you moaned as you felt him stretch and fill you.
Astarion gave a series of gasps, as he felt the vibration of your throat tingling against him with every sound you were making.  It didn’t take long before it became too much for him, and with a low moan, he bucked his hips up, hot ropes of cum shooting into your mouth.  You worked your throat to swallow it all, drinking him down much like he drank you barely minutes ago.
You opened your mouth to let Astarion’s cock slide out with one last swipe of your tongue.  As you lifted your head up, Halsin took the moment to drive deeply into you, and you arched back against him.  As your body raised slightly, you felt his powerful arms grip you, lifting you into his lap as he knelt behind you, your knees spread wide over him. 
“That’s it, my love, let him fill you.  You can take him, can’t you? I saw what he has, you must be feeling so full, darling. Is he making you feel good?”
Your eyes fluttered shut as you nodded, whimpering a soft “yes” to each of his questions.  Astarion lifted a hand to gently cup your chin, tilting your face to his.
“No, no.  Eyes on me, darling.  Remember, I wanted to see you come undone.”
You opened your eyes again, meeting his gaze.  Halsin gave a low growl as he pulled your body close in against him, one arm wrapped around your waist, the other gripping your thigh.  He dipped to kiss the back of your shoulder, but the proximity to your scent gave his bear other ideas.  With a flash of gold in his eyes, you felt teeth against your shoulder, holding you in a mating bite.  You keened as he flexed his hips roughly against you, pounding deeply into you, over and over again. 
“Come on, my darling, let go for me.  For us.”
Astarion reached down, fingers expertly reaching for your clit again, and you squealed at the overstimulation, tears forming in your eyes.  He pushed his thumb into your open mouth, and you sucked noisily on it, your tongue moving against it in the same rhythm as your cunt clenched around Halsin, bringing him his own climax as he bucked his hips up, pumping you full. 
You collapsed onto your side with Halsin and lay there for a few moments, spent.  As your breathing returned to normal, you felt him soften and slip out of you.  He stood up and crossed the room, returning with your washbowl of water and a couple of cloths.  He dampened one, and used it to carefully clean the mess off your thighs.  Astarion took the other one, and wiped gently at your face, dabbing off the sweat, and the remnants of his spend that had dribbled on your chin.
“How do you feel, darling?”  he asked cautiously.
You gave a contented smile.  “Sated.  For now.” Your face changed to a look of concern as you asked him  “And you?  Are you alright?”
“I’m fine.  I think that was enough to make it pass for me.  And … thank you for helping.”
“It was the least I could do, I got you into that state, after all”
“Well, maybe if that neck of yours wasn’t so damned irresistible.”  He teased, with a wry smile.  “But, fair point.  Perhaps I would be wise to seek my meals elsewhere for the next few days.”
He touched a finger to the bruised bite mark blooming on your shoulder.  “And it looks like I wasn’t the only one who wanted to make a meal of you.”
Halsin laughed, a deep throaty rumble, and touched a healing tendril to the marks. “Indeed.  But at least I did not partake of her blood. I fear I would have lost control completely, and I don’t think this bed could handle the bear.”
Astarion looked at you, the blissed out look on your face as you lay there, unsure how to ask his next question.  “Love, should we leave?  Do you need to be alone?  In case it happens again?”
You yawned sleepily, and shook your head.  “No, I’ll be fine for a few hours.  You can stay.”  You glanced at Halsin. “You can both stay.  If you wish.”
You wrapped an arm over Astarion, as he shifted his body in against yours.  Halsin curled in behind you, and you smiled, feeling warm and safely held between your two lovers.
** A few nights later **
Astarion snuggled contentedly against your back.  He’d missed curling in against your warmth these past few nights.
“Darling?” he whispered in your ear.
“Mmhmm?”
“I’ve been thinking.  About that night, with Halsin.  About how you looked, how you tasted.”
You tensed, unsure what he was about to say.  You said nothing.
“I’d like … I want … to do that again sometime.  Only, next time, I want to enjoy you as much as he did.”
You relaxed again, smiling against the pillow.  You’d been hoping for this, you just hadn’t been certain that the time was right to ask him about it.  But you still weren’t quite prepared for his next words.
“I can’t wait to hear the sweet sounds you’re going to make with us both deep inside you.”
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