#cioccolata/reader

[bebegi]

OOPS! ೃ⁀➷ VENTO AUREO

𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶! 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘩 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭! 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦!

genre: accidental confession | modern au | reader x doppio, tiziano + squalo, fugo & cioccolata.

warnings: cioccolata is in these, i'm sorry.

PART I– PART II – PART III – PART IV – PART V – PART VI – PART VII – PART VIII – PART IX

notes: to the person who requested cioccolata... you okay babe? mmmmkay, no worries there!!! totally normal!!

notes²: but do not fear! my favourite married couple is here!! brrrRrr

© bebegi 2024. do not crop the tag or claim it as yours in any way please, do not repost in other sites without asking for permission + credit, thanks !! reblogs are highly appreciated ♡

[thus-wrote-mrs-zeppeli]

Jjba Golden Wind antagonists x reader

Prompt: You knew it was an awful idea, but you couldn’t help but wish for your family to at least meet the man you were with. It had felt like something you had to do at the time, and now you were regretting it-of COURSE bringing a man from the mafia home wasn’t smart-

Reader is NOT a part of Passione, but is aware they are.

Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, characters are jerks, reader does not want to be in a relationship with Melone in his part, discussion of marriage and pressure to get married, canon typical aggressive and murderous behavior (mainly Cioccolata and Diavolo), death

Characters: all of La Squadra (no Sorbet and Gelato), Cioccolata (I’m sorry he’s just so funny) Diavolo (yeah it goes about as well as you’d expect lol)

“Come back to me a while

Change your taste in men”

Formaggio: Meet your parents? Welllll…okay, he’ll do it without too much complaint if it gets you to stop nagging him. He’s not that interested in such things, hell he probably doesn’t think your relationship is even that serious yet. But if you really want to drag him to your parents’ place for some formality’s sake? Fine, but don’t expect a ring or something just because he met your folks.

Honestly…….he’s not the WORST man you could’ve brought home. On the surface, at least.

You begged him not to mention the whole “assassin of a large Italian mafia” thing. He gave you a thumbs up and a smug smirk that made you think he was going to mention it just because you told him not to.

But he has his own type of charisma, immediately friendly with your parents. He’s much too casual given the circumstances, but he’s been like that for as long as you’ve known him. And he DOES end up mentioning the “assassin of a large Italian mafia” thing when they asked what he did for a living, and he even had the audacity to wink at you after your parents laughed it off, assuming it was just a joke. UGH. He LOVED messing with you. He says he’s actually a vet tech. You have to hold yourself back from laughing out loud, remembering a few occasions where you had to liberate his poor cat from a jar or a cupboard or any other weird tiny place he found he could put it.

Well, at least your parents are convinced you got yourself a decent guy. He performed a little TOO well though. Now they’re constantly asking you about how you and Formaggio are doing, when you guys are gonna visit again, stuff like that. And at first he’s super smug about it; your parents liking him is GREAT for him because he can get stuff out of them, especially when he turns on the charm.

But that backfires on him. It doesn’t take too long before they’re asking him when he’s gonna pop the question, and he knows if he answers truthfully (he doesn’t plan on proposing. Ever.), suddenly his standing with you and your parents isn’t gonna look so good.

You wonder what’s got him in such a bad mood when he shows up at your apartment. He tells you he doesn’t want to talk to your parents as often anymore, and his unusually irritable tone makes you hesitate to ask what the hell happened with your parents.

“And quit telling them stuff about how we’re gonna get hitched, it’s NOT happening, sweetheart.”

Um…

He doesn’t usually talk THAT harshly towards you, and you don’t even know what he’s referring to.

You haven’t said anything to them about that. You let it go though. He just needs to cool off.

Illuso: Your arrogant jerk of a boyfriend loves to hear you suggest he meets your parents. It’s a huge ego boost for him. You want him to put a ring on it that badly, eh? You like him that much?Alright, alright, he can make some time for that~he’s not opposed to the idea, though you shouldn’t actually expect much immediate change in your relationship even if meeting your folks goes well.

Your parents aren’t sure what to think of your man…they want to take his smug narcissistic mannerisms as a joke but he actually seems serious.

And just something about how he pulls you to his side like he owns you rubs them the wrong way. He doesn’t seem to take you that seriously either, often dismissing what you say. He clearly wants to be in charge of your relationship, and it’s making him come off as a bully. And you seem used to it.

You know him. He’s just trying to show off. And yeah he’s never been the Best boyfriend to you, but he acts especially jerky when you’re around other people in an attempt to seem more confident and secure in his relationship.

He would be much better off being honest with himself instead of putting on these acts that just result in him looking like a crappy boyfriend. He lives up to his name, you suppose.

You say he completely embarrassed himself and you in front of your parents.

He pretends to dismiss it.

But it starts Really bothering him. And he’s got too much pride to ask you what you mean so…he’ll just let it keep him up at night.

Prosciutto: Internally he actually would like the approval of your father before he married you. But he acts disinterested and defiant towards the idea. Though if you really insist then PERHAPS he could find some space in his busy schedule to visit your dad with you.

“Try to be nice,” you requested of him as you buttoned up the rest of his shirt for him so he’d be presentable.

“I AM nice,” he grumbles back, and you can’t resist laughing out loud. Ok, sure. But seriously, be nice.

It’s bizarre to see him trying to be his version of polite, because his version of polite is to just be quiet. It’s a bit funny, he really doesn’t have anything nice to say so he’ll just not say anything at all. You have to make an active effort to not laugh at him this evening.

It goes alright since he only responds when specifically spoken to, so at worst your dad just thinks your boyfriend is boring. If you like him, whatever, your dad is fine with it. But don’t come crying to him when your lame ass boyfriend is driving you insane.

Prosciutto seems mildly pleased with himself when the two of you leave, since he got your father’s seal of approval. And you don’t know what to say when he asks you if your dad liked him (while pretending not to care in typical Prosciutto fashion).

You tell him he did just fine. As long as he remains careful about how he speaks to you around his dad, there probably won’t be any issues.

Pesci: Yeah Pesci has the common sense to think meeting your parents is not the greatest idea. What part about assassin in the mafia sounds like something they’d like?? You’re like it’s fine, just lie!

Well. Okay but. How well is that gonna work in the long run…?

You say don’t worry about it, you’ll figure it out together if it ever becomes a problem. And when you take his hands and plead with him he can’t bring himself to deny you, even though he thinks it’s a bad idea.

You know Pesci’s disposition won’t betray your deception; you know the last thing they’d think was that Pesci was actually bad news. Maybe a bit of a pushover, but definitely not dangerous.

Your parents are very convinced that he’s just some fisherman you happened upon and formed a bond with. And he seems sweet enough. A little shy, but nice.

Oh you’re so happy, your parents finally approve of a boyfriend you’ve brought home, and ironically they don’t know he’s probably THE baddest boy you’ve ever brought to them.

You kiss his shoulder on the way out the door, and he wants to know why you’re laughing so much.

You say nothing, just thinking the whole thing is funny.

Melone: It’s Melone’s suggestion that he meets your parents. You’re not so sure, worried he was going to humiliate both of you in front of your parents, and worried he was planning on proposing to you.

Yeah you liked him a lot but…honestly you felt like this relationship just wasn’t working out. He was too…eccentric. Too unpredictable. You wanted something at least somewhat stable and Melone was absolutely not going to give that to you with his disposition and line of work. And yet, you’re clinging on to him anyways, since he’s the boyfriend you’ve had for the longest, and you’re admittedly curious to see what would happen if you brought him to meet your parents.

He won’t provide for you. You know your parents are going to think the same thing….among…other things…about your eccentric boyfriend.

And sure enough…

Your parents are dragging you into the kitchen wondering where you found such a sick pervert. You didn’t really think a guy like that was gonna make you happy, did you? And he didn’t even make good money? Sheesh. Please do better. Find literally anyone else. Please. You don’t want to deal with it, but they have a point that you should stop leading him on and just break up with him.

Melone thought it went great because he tends to hear what he wants to hear. And now he’s wrapping his arm a little too low down your body, confidently telling you you’ll love the ring he picked out for you~

Good freaking grief, what a mess-

Ghiaccio: He knows he Should just go along with it and finally meet your parents, but he Really doesn’t want to. Doing that means you might expect him to marry you, or spend time with your family; two things he does Not want to do, at least right now.

But ok. He’ll remind you that you’re one of the few people who know him well, so if you think it’ll be alright…then fine. He’ll trust you.

Honestly, no matter how well you thought you knew him, you could never tell what exactly was going to set him off. But you were sure your parents could easily say something that could drive him insane…and you knew it’d look really, Really bad if you told your parents to mind what they said around your boyfriend because he had severe anger issues…

Yeah, he does come off as a bad boyfriend, with the way he holds your hand or wrist way too tight and guides you around, or always seems on the verge of screaming at you, and tapping his foot in irritation when he’s otherwise holding still.

He refrains from actually losing it, but you know he found the whole thing annoying from the way he sped home, practically breaking the steering wheel from his tight grip.

He does NOT wanna talk about it, he doesn’t wanna hear what your parents thought because he Knows it wasn’t good and you better not think this’ll change anything in your relationship drastically. You don’t want to open up that conversation with him, so you stay quiet. Stressing him out further is literally the last thing you want to do.

Risotto Nero: He can’t believe you’re actually serious about him meeting your mother. He’s not exactly a gentle man, both in appearances and personality. But if you really want him to, then it’s not a big deal to him, but he wants to make sure you know it’s not gonna go so well.

He’s calm and capable of holding a conversation, but still. LOOK at him. He’s not the traditional definition of boyfriend-

Your mother is initially very frightened by his appearance, understandably so, but he just tries to have a conversation like a normal person and Yeah he’s pretty stoic but…he seems ok. He certainly took the time to get to know you. He understands you well. He’s surprisingly aware of your mood, able to tell when something’s bothering you or making you uncomfortable even when you’re not being obvious about it. He’s not particularly affectionate or sweet, very blunt when he asks you: “what is it?” when you seem unhappy, but his intentions aren’t to sound mean or impatient. It’s just how he talks.

Once your mom realizes that, she thinks he’s a sweet enough man.

Risotto honestly hasn’t ever had to think about visiting a partner’s parent, so he just doesn’t mention it after that. Though he’s not entirely opposed to seeing her again, he would like to remind you that he Is the leader of an assassination squadron, and your sweet mother would probably not be happy to find out about that.

Just keep it in mind, please: he’s no longer suited for such social activities, no matter how much he pretends for your sake.

Cioccolata: SHEESH. You canNOT be serious. He looks at you like ?????? Really???? He’s not exactly. Welcome in society anymore. And there’s no way you’re not aware of that, right???? Well you don’t Really care but for tradition’s sake you wanted to do this. Didn’t matter what your family thought, but you felt the need to get it over with. And well…he’s surprisingly not opposed to marrying you if that’s what you really want. You already live together, beyond Secco you’re literally the only person who can stomach being near him for more than five minutes, and he’s wealthy enough to easily afford a ring for you. If you don’t make it a big deal then what the hell, sure; he’ll marry you.

You knew bringing him to meet your family was gonna go super well because that morning started with an argument after you told him to not bring Secco along.

And when you do eventually get Cioccolata to your parents’ home…yeah. When you said he was a“surgeon” they were expecting something. Different. Very convenient you left out the “former” part of that description.

He makes them incredibly uncomfortable, and it’s not long before he’s being asked to leave and never interact with you again.

You’ve gotten used to Cioccolata’s insanely sadistic personality, but even you felt a shiver of disgust when he passed you a chilling smile that was asking for your permission for him to hurt your family. You knew he’d do it anyways if you don’t intervene, so after an extraordinarily uncomfortable half hour you’re dragging your terrifying boyfriend out the door, already accepting you’d probably not be talking to your family again anytime soon.

Yeah they’re definitely gonna think you’re dead. And that was the Tame version of Cioccolata they saw-you haven’t been able to mellow his personality out at all, but you pride yourself on your ability to get him to behave himself…to a degree.

But now that that’s over with, you really wanted that ring. You really must’ve become desensitized to him at this point, with the way you clung to his arm as the two of you left, whining and nagging him to finally marry you because you’ve been dating for so long and he still hasn’t proposed-

Same guy who killed people literally just for his own pleasure-

He brushes you off like you were just begging him for money again, assuring you he’d get you a ring when he found the time for it. Keep nagging him and you might actually get your wish this time.

Diavolo: Such a sweet, naive thing…he’s really hit the jackpot with you. You really wanted him to meet your family? Have you not been paying attention? He doesn’t want to be known by anyone…but you thought that maybe your family would be an exception…And with how passive and even eager he seemed to meet your family, you honestly thought you were right.

You’re not surprised when Doppio ends up being the one meeting your family instead. But it works out well. Doppio is a hit with your family, he seems sweet and reasonable, and his clumsiness was endearing in a way.

You’re glad it all went well, not thinking anything of the evening.

But you had given Diavolo your parents’ address, and through that, access to their names, and the names of anyone else in your family if he did just a bit of research…

Your anonymity is just as important to him as his own if you’re to be in a relationship. You can’t have a family, you’ll only need him on the path you two are taking.

Act out all you want if you’re upset when your entire family disappears in a matter of days, if you decide you want to back out on him now he’ll just send you to join them. Even if you were an enjoyable companion, if you put his identity at risk he’s not gonna let you walk away.

-

Title is from the song “Taste in Men” by Placebo

Hmmmmm need to actually do a full fic sometime…I still have something in the works for Diavolo but I need to put it all together lol. Finally doing that thing where you just write what you have ideas for, and then work on the other parts later and honestly it’s been working great, would recommend.

Super inconsistent lengths again lol someday I will figure out consistency-

[shineonyoucrazyyandere]

Who in the jojoverse would gladly accept getting slapped or hit, etc by the reader? (Aka a masochist)

Im betting that there is anasui on the list. ☝️

Oh Anasui is up there alright, slap him as much as you like he still loves you. A few others I can think off the top of my head :

*characters are aged up to 18 or older if they aren’t already*

Melone (got slapped in canon), he reacts like it’s nothing, you might’ve made things worse actually as he licks his lips

Terunosuke Miyamoto - observes people for their idiosyncrasies involving fear so I see him handling slaps more than most other Yandere characters. Likely into it honestly.

Vanilla Ice - big time masochist when it comes to his darling. He takes it as a sign to correct something, but also a form of affection that you need him. Hitting him doesn’t really get him to back off either.

Cioccolata - he’s both a sadist and a masochist, most of the people he’s tortured never really had a chance to fight back. So it brings an interesting prospect to subdue you from doing that again. You might even get a reward later for it.

Esidisi - he’s kind of a curveball with his reactions, almost to mess with you. He find it interesting you’d go for a slap rather than a punch, that would certainly do more damage would it not? He does personally like it, though even with his obsessiveness, Esidisi messing with you, it’s hard to actually tell what he really likes. (That makes it even better).

Akira Otoishi- It’s in a, you can slap me anytime but I could easily kill you with my stand kind of way. But he does indulge in your slap, even teases you for it, no matter how hard you do it or if it leaves a mark.

[nicherayyy]

hii so I’m a little shy with requests but could you do a team bucciarati or la unita (your pick) x child!reader who basically has a super powerful stand but they are completely oblivious to it? Like I could imagine them trying to inform reader and readers just like “I like flowers and ice cream : )”

Okay but this is such a great idea-

La Unita x Oblivious Child Reader

Okay, how did this happen??

The main reason, they took you in because of your stand

It's not every day you meet someone with THAT MUCH potential

Plus your powers were supposed to help the boss himself

So yeah, you were supposed to be quite useful

The problem is, you don't really care about any of this "ohmygod you have such a powerful stand" stuff

Nuh uh, not even a little

Understandable, you are a child after all

In your defence, whatever you like doing, it is much more interesting than all these serious meetings and trainings

Uh uh, yeah, what were you saying? I am a powerful individual and- OH MY GOD IS THAT A PUPPY??

Squalo and Tiziano are pretty chill about it

I mean, you're a child

Surely you'll be more interested in butterflies or cartoons more than that grown-up stuff

Do you even know what the mafia is?

Generally, they just want you to enjoy your childhood

Very supportive about your interests

You want to go out for icecream? Sure, we'll get the car stared

Oh, you want to play with legos? No more words needed. We'll get you a full cart of those

It's like they have a child of their own

Carne is not worried either

Also likes to spend time with you

Mostly he just listens to your bubbling about a cool bird you saw or what a good breakfast you had

Sometimes you reming him his younger self

Powers or not, not one dares to take away your childhood just because you got a stand you didn't even ask for

So.. Cioccolata and Secco..

They don't even interact with you

Cio is just busy doing his own stuff and Secco blindly follows him around

Maybe it's for the best

Ciocolatta is interested in that stand of yours tho

But for now, when you're not even fully aware what stand is, he's just keeping his distance

He doesn't need a child who follows him and Secco around just to talk about childlike stuff

But as I said, maybe it's for the best

The one who WANTS you to develop your powers is Diavolo, of course

If Doppio is still somehow bearable, Diavolo is obsessed with the idea that you'll be a great addition to La Unita

"That is why you need to improve your stand, to be the greatest-"

"I saw a cute kitten today"

It's driving him insane at some point

How can you not want to be the best??

You don't want to beat all your enemies??

But it's not like you even have enemies

You try to keep distance with him

Good for you honestly

Overall, it is chaotic sometimes

But if you just gonna hang out with Squalo or Tiz.. or Carne it's gonna be fine

They're really good parental figures for you too

Such a nice bonus

[princelylove]

Greetings your highness!This is my first time sending an ask here and english is not my forte so sorry for not being as eloquent as others Ive read. I just wanted to (humbly) ask for your opinion on the La Unita members, whatever main antics you want to highlight and what they seek in a partner.

Don't fret about your english. Never respect english as a language. That's how they win.

Do you mean the special unit? They're freaks. All of them. Lets talk about what they usually go for in a relationship, and what they're most likely actually going to become obsessed with.

Tiziano has a lot of confidence, although it mainly comes from how well thought out most of his actions are. He dislikes people that are unpredictable or just hard to read, they stress him out and honestly he's paying too much for his skincare to have a person be the reason for anything premature...

Tiz likes to keep most of his options open. He doesn't like to feel trapped, but craves stability. He wants the comfort of a relationship without feeling like a gun's against his head. He wants someone casual, someone that's honest about their feelings and intentions. Someone that won't stress him out constantly. Will he actually fall for someone like this? Maybe, if he lucks out. He's more likely to fall for someone that causes him actual distress, someone that he can potentially "fix."

Squalo is the type of guy to want a total bombshell. He wants someone that looks like they'd be on the cover of playboy magazine.

Can he actually afford one? Well, only kinda. Does he want one anyway? Hell yeah.

He's a scammer, but he'd never get his bitch his darling a fake bag. He'll make it work. He's actually paid pretty well, he just usually blows it on something stupid and has to survive off of leftovers until his next job. If he has a darling, that's something way better to blow all his money on! He gets kind of pissed if he can't be selfish with his money because of monthly 'maintenances' but it's so worth it that he'll smile through the pain. Let him pick the color of your nails next time, yeah?

The probability of Squalo actually landing somebody like this... well, he doesn't have bad odds. He ain't bad looking, and he can act pretty normal before he lets it slip that he's a little possessive. Why bag a bad bitch and then act like they're a new person for being one? Funny guy. You know, he can fight, so wear whatever you want, but he's still gonna tug on your shorts every once in a while.

We don't really know much about Carne, but he was a man prepared to die for another. Another man that, really, he barely knew. People that don't have a lot to live for will cling to absolutely anything that gives them the tiniest bit of hope- even if it's fleeting.

Carne understands that one day he is going to die prematurely for the boss. That is his purpose, that is the trade he willingly signed up for. Perhaps he wants someone bright to cling to. Someone that he knows he's going to drag down, but it's only for a little bit, so it can't be that bad for them long term.

A bright person.... probably a caring, outgoing person. The type of person that helps another on the street, knowing that there's plenty of human traffickers out there that catch prey the same way. Carne just wants to look at them for a little bit, hold them, admire them like you'd admire a piece of jewelry. This isn't forever. Just bear it. He knows he's disgusting, but you can be patient. He'll just be a memory one day.

Cioccolata wants some novelty. He gets bored very easily, and struggles to keep interest in things long-term. The only thing that genuinely interests him- besides from physiology and anatomy, of course- is pain. Ideally, he'd find a masochist that wants to play with him, but isn't it so much better if they don't?

It can be exciting to deal with an equally interested masochist, but that's going to bore him long-term. Really, both of the options presented to him will bore him eventually, he just doesn't know that yet. You can only fight him off so many ways, can only try so many things. What if he happens to catch a sadist, who will never break?

The idea makes him so unbelievably happy. Playtime, forever! A sadist won't just not give in- they're going to fight back, in a way that could potentially kill him. How thrilling! It's different, you know. A masochist knows what hurts, so when they fight back, they might swing for something that's going to just make it stop. A sadist, however... the fun doesn't stop once Cioccolata is down.

Secco is an enigma to most of the people that know him. For someone as eager for connection as him, he's not very open. Secco likes to pretend to be whatever his person of interest likes, for Cioccolata, it's a puppy that wants to play. For you... who knows. He'd rather not have a total switch up, he's not prepared to let you see the actual him- the him that stands like a normal human being and can use a phone just fine.

Puppy wants someone that's going to give him attention. There's nothing he wants more, there's nothing he won't do for it. This leads him to fawn over Cioccolata's victims that tend to people please as a stress response. Yessss, he's doing sooo baaadddd, pet him, talk to him, pity him, help him ouuttt...

He isn't above guilting them. Doesn't it make you uncomfortable to see an injured dog? Secco would actually break a bone if it meant he got a second glance, of course he's fine with lying about the relationship he has with Cioccolata.

[kimbap-r0ll]

May I request some headcanons on Unità Speciale from JoJo’s about how they would act around their crush? (I think Squalo and Tiziano would go together since I’m pretty sure they’re a couple-)

Hi! Omg another JoJo ask! I really love these asks so plz send them over! As for Squalo and Tiziano, I think honestly they are a couple as well (in my canon they are) so I’ll be grouping them ^^. I’ll probably group Secco and Cioccolata together too since they work as a duo (and could be seen as a couple but I’ll let readers decide)

How Unita Speciale acts around a crush

Squalo + Tiziano

Honestly I think Tiziano would be hard to read, but Squalo would be pretty easy. Like he would have a little bit of a stutter when he talks to his crush or like he’ll be blushing when they get close or smile in his direction. Tiziano might give them a pleasant smile or be softer around them. Even if the crush doesn’t see Squalo’s crush, Tiziano will catch on and so will Squalo to Tiziano.

The two of them will likely have a bit of a talk, just on whether or not they should also have the crush part of the duo and let the relationship become a trio. Likely chance is that they’ll be fine with it, and from then on they’ll likely be flirty towards the crush.

Tiziano is a bit more suave with the flirtation. He’s definitely not afraid to be a bit touchy with it, but he’ll just like watching them become a flustered mess. That doesn’t mean Squalo’s not flirtatious, he’s probably just as good. He’s a bit of a tease like Tiziano is, but it might be a bit more on the rough end (ie playfully pushing the crush around or like jump-scaring them with a surprise hug from behind). Either way expect the crush to get some physical affection along with very suave words.

The confession will come from them both, probably asking the crush to meet with them in a more private setting. It might be a side of a bar or a quiet area of town. The two of them will just explain it to the crush with simple words, nothing too long and nothing too short. If the crush agrees to date, expect a more in-your-face reaction from Squalo while Tiziano is a bit more calm (still has that amazing smile ofc)

Overall I think it would be a coordinated act. Before then the crush will just notice the two hanging around them more often or going on jobs/missions more with them. The two will also be a lot nicer to the crush than when they first met (I feel like they wouldn’t be as friendly tbh to other members of Passione unless they were close).

Cioccolata + Secco

Oh man. First of all to whoever became their crush I’m sorry. But on the other hand, hey it might be a cool experience? Or maybe the person like them, either way the crush will not know they had a crush until they say it, mostly because they’ll just be around them and the crush might think “oh no am I just on their good side or am I going to become a lab rat”

I think Secco would be easier to read. He will be, well, himself and might smother the crush a bit (I imagine he would be sort of like how cat’s brush up against people’s legs) but the crush might just think Secco’s interested in them like in a friendly way. Secco might talk to them more too, like actual interactions. Similar with Cioccolata he might talk to the crush more often but he’s good at hiding the attraction. If the crush compliments him, he’ll just thank them, but the crush might notice him being a bit more giddy than usual

I also feel like Cioccolata and Secco don’t do pick up lines or flirty words. For example, they probably have a weird sense of affection that isn’t really understood by common people, so depending on the crush the words will make them blush or drain the happiness out of their day haha. They’ll be more like gift-giving because it’s a bit simpler for the two parties.

The two might talk about it but Cioccolata might make the ultimate decision. The next step is on whether or not the crush ends up like Secco or if the crush goes through with the relationship without becoming a potential lab rat. The crush might feel like they need to agree, but the two might be a bit flexible if it comes to a rejection. They’ll just be more distant

Overall I think if the crush has good chemistry with this medical duo they’ll be fine. Hell they might be a force in Unita Speciale if their stand and their teamwork is super good with Cioccolata and Secco. The relationship might be more or less normal but it could also just be more destruction (it’s for you to decide)

Carne

He’s quiet, not very talkative and rarely shows emotions outside of his stand. However, when he has a crush it might be easier to read him because he gets flustered more

For example, if the crush worked with him for a while they might notice he’s a bit more shy than usual or that he’s a bit flustered when they compliment him. He’s less 😶 than usual like more 😳. He’s more of a gift-giver too since he doesn’t feel that good with words

I think it would take a long time for him to confess to his crush, like practice in front of a mirror or write it out. He’s probably dated once or twice, but he doesn’t really remember much about how they started so it feels like he has to start from scratch. He will NOT let anyone know about his crush though, in case their life gets threatened (if they are a civilian) or it gets awkward as a team (if they are part of the team).

His confession might be a bit awkward, it’s in a secluded place and his voice is fairly quiet. It’s kinda cute though coming from someone who works with one of Italy’s strongest mafias. If the crush agrees he’ll be delighted, honestly might just ask if they wanted to hang out for a bit longer. If the crush says no, then he’ll try to be a bit nonchalant about it but he’ll likely cut ties with them because it makes him think about his confession more.

Either way, he’s sort of like what I imagine Pesci would be like except he doesn’t have a “fratello” to help him or hype him up haha. He’ll be nice as a boyfriend, but he’ll be busy once Bruno’s gang decides to go against Diavolo

Doppio

Honestly he might be in denial for a bit that he has a crush on someone. He thinks it’s silly, maybe he’s seen too many tv shows or didn’t keep himself busy that he had time to dream. However, he’ll come around and just agree to himself that yeah maybe he has a crush

Diavolo might get in the way of Doppio trying to pick the crush up or like hanging out with them because Diavolo had a relationship before and he wants to keep anonymity, but Diavolo might stop if Doppio convinces him. The two don’t really have the exact same goals in terms of getting to know people

Doppio is always a more cheerful guy, he’s definitely going to be sweet to his crush. He’s friendly, takes them out to places, and genuinely spends time getting to know them. I feel like though he does blush from time to time, the crush might never see him flustered. He seems like the type to know how to hide emotions when he needs to, and this might be one of the cases. However, the crush will know Doppio’s at least enjoying their company

When it comes to the confession, he might be a bit more of a stuttering mess. He’s a bit shy with his words, likely does it outside in a less crowded area (like a seashore or a park) and just thinks of his words on the spot. He hopes the Boss won’t call him during this important moment as he waits for his crush to give him an answer. If that answer is yes, then he’ll be super happy and might give them a hug immediately after haha. If not, he’ll give an awkward laugh and say it’s no worry, the two could still be friends. Depending on if the crush is a civilian or not, they may see Doppio less

Overall I think he would be more of a daydreamer, sort of imagining what his life could be like with this crush and the things that romance brings in life. He might’ve talked to Diavolo about his crush too, but Diavolo likely shut him up and told him to focus on his work before rambling about the crush. Doppio’s a sweet guy ^^

[waterb0ttleguy]

Draw Secco

Heres ur dog

[wumpslut]

Guys did I mention how much I hate x fem readers for secco and cioccolata

THEY LIKE MEN

[soupbabe]

Sorry for the worlds most niche ask but … poly Carne x Ciocolatta x male La Unita reader?

(I wanna throw Secco into the polycule pile as well but I’m worried that’s asking too much work for such a niche ask 😭 feel free to leave him out if you want)

Reader would obviously have to be someone with a) the ruthlessness to make it to La Unita and b) the unhinged-ness to be partly dating ciocolatta 😭😭 but tbf have you seen La Unita? No one on that roster is normal and well adjusted (not even Squalo and Tiz, they’re freaks too /affectionate)

Poly! Carne/Cioccolata/Secco x Male! La Unità Speciale! Reader

Dude you're so more than welcome to request niche stuff !! Carne n Cioccolata is like in the top 3 of the only JoJo ships I care about. Next to Esikars and Tomoko x Shinobu from part 4 😭

Warning: these are kinda all over the place??, tried to give each character a chance to shine but there might be some uneven coverage of characters, Cioccolata is his own brand of concern

- One word to describe the relationship: intense

- Everyone loves aggressively and frequently

- Hard to say if there's some kind of "balance" between the four of you. Even Carne, though silent, is just as clingy and touchy as Cioccolata and Secco

- Oh yeah btw you're never going to be left alone

- Even on missions, even if Doppio insists you go alone, they don't care. I really think these three men take Doppio or Diavolo's words as just a suggestion.

- Secco is the worst offender. His clinginess is overwhelming. He'll always insist that he holds your hand, your waist, any bit of skin he can get his hands on

- And he's just as determined that you give him the same attention. He'll always want you to pet him, to sing the same praises as Cioccolata, give him some special treatment w extra sugar cubes or kisses. Your attention is very addicting

- Cioccolata and Carne on the other hand? They're around you just to get a rise out of you

- Like I know Carne stepped closer to Mista just because he thought it was funny that it annoyed him

- They both love to scare and prod at you. Cioccolata does all the talking and teasing for the both of them, wheress Carne just likes to stare and hold you

- The unwavering eye contact could make anyone squirm and a low rumble erupts from his chest when Carne knows he's getting to you

- While it's fairly easy to fluster Secco and (kind of) Carne back, it's become a game between you and Cioccolata to see how you could make the surgeon blush

- He rolls his eyes when you act sweet, he laughs and plays along when you try to get intimate and tease him, you could show up at his door covered in blood and his face doesn't grow warm

- The secret? Join in on one of his tapes, he wants to see you revel in the adrenaline rush of murder.

- It's the action that gets blood rushing to his cheeks, it's the fact that he's sharing the experience with you and Secco. No secret that the doctor has a twisted sense of joy and romance, he loves taping the "dates" he has with you because of this

- It's like a lil scrapbook, y'know? Fond memories with you and Secco <3

- Sometimes Carne joins in on the fun, but he's rather camera shy, so he's the director. While you three are making out sloppy style, his hand is in the corner frame giving a small thumbs up.

- You four are only considered "cute" by Tiziano and Squalo, but you all really are happier than what any outsider can assume

[i-am-a-fraud]

Obsessed

Cioccolata x reader x secco

Back at it again with being the worst writer known to man

Nsfw 🔞 kinda not really it's Cioccolata. We are talking about

Not really edited much. DADDY WILL DEAL WITH THAT LATER (ha!)

..................................................................................

These two are going to ruin your life

Secco will record you in your own home and process the film into hard drives and give them out to your family, friends, and Coworkers

Cioccolata will collect things you leave behind. (Hair clips, strands of hair, spit, gasses you drank from, silverware you used, anything)

After awhile they will get bored of ruining your life and want you in there lives

What where they to do there love wouldn't notice them or there love was just too stupid to notice them

Either way they are going to dumb you down.

Cioccolata watches you sleep your eyes drive him crazy especially when your scared, but he doesn't care it only turns him on more.

Cioccolata let's secco be with you but you are his and his only he only let's secco mess around with you for his own pleasure.

And if you are obsessive over them and just as crazy they only love you even more and may let you partake in "experiments"

I am going to go into reader being obsessed with them

You heard about a what they had done in the newspapers

In a way you idolized the duo.

You exspress to your freinds your fantasies with the two men yet they don't understand

Not long after that you kept those thoughts to youself.

It is sad really why don't they understand that you where made for them and they where made for you

You could live happily! Every night you dream of the life you could have with them when your alarm clock rings your practically in denial

And so with that said you set out to find the two men you had fallen for.

It will be difficult but if you happen to find them and take pictures with your Polaroid it will be heaven.

It is shameful hiding from your lovers but worth the wait when they catch onto you.

Before you know it you will be tied to an operating table.

If you some how manage to convince them your not with the press you will have the opportunity to become there little pet

Not quite what you would exspect but it's something good enough for you.

If you show to be as ruthless and as brutal as them they might just fall for you

[the-illiterate-pirate]

what characters do you think would enjoy slapping and/or choking their partner? <33

— For a character I can see enjoying both I have to choose Formaggio. He knows how to use his hands, and low-key enjoys giving you a little pain during sex. As long as you're okay with it, Formaggio knows just how to choke you out to bring out the most pleasure from it. But above all he loves to slap your ass, any time anywhere, it can get annoying

— Prosciutto also pegs me as a guy into both, but in moderation. He doesn't necessarily chokes you out during sex but rather just likes to keep his hand on your neck, giving it a light squeeze now and then, and he loves to spank you

— Ciocolata loves both, and he's more extreme about it. Enjoys slapping you more than choking, and does it anywhere on your body, after scenes it's common to come out bright red, feint hand prints everywhere, but he makes sure to fix them up!

— Finally, Valentine. Enjoys a little roleplay behind it, and prefers spanking you but doesn't really put his hands anywhere else. Similar to Pros he likes to keep a hand on your neck, but doesn't really choke you.

I'll have to end this here because if I had to list every character who's just into slap ass, we'd be here all day

[lotty--spider]

Sooooo, this is my incert from JJBA but Golden Wing lol.

I like Cioccolata and is my husband (?) Idk

My incert is called Lottie and she has a strange relationship with Cioccolata. I hope to upload more things about both of them or her, for now Bald Cioccolata is enough

Mi incert se llama Lottie y tiene una relación extraña con Cioccolata. Ojalá subir más cosas de ambos o de ella, por ahora Cioccolata calvo es suficiente

[nicherayyy]

So wow, I don't really understand how requests work, sorry! But since we've seen the Bucci gang and La Squadra with the kid from South Park, what about La Unita? I am sure that Chocolata will like this child very much

A/N: I'M ALIVEEEEE

TW: just the South Park thing

Chapters from this AU:

Bucci Gang x South Park! Child Reader

La Squadra x South Park! Child Reader

La Unita x South Park! Child Reader

That is literally the weirdest situation you could imagine yourself in

Okay, maybe not the weirdest

Especially when you used to live in South Park

So yeah.. you saw a thing or two

I'm not even sure why La Unita decided to take you in

Most likely it was Squalo and Tiziano's idea

Like how can you even leave a 4th grader on the streets??

Especially when there's bunch of criminals running around

The two of them are actually one of your main caretakers

But sometimes Squalo is concerned about your.. mental state

Cause there's just no way those stories back from South Park are real

And for Tiziano's the only concern is your cussing habit

Like child ur nine stop with the f word pls

Overall they're like parents to you

Just don't dig too deep into the details about your previous life

Cioccolata has some mixed feelings about you

I mean, he hates children

But you're fun to talk with so I guess you're not as bad as he thought

(No cussing rule doesn't work with him)

It's so weird that you're not scared of him

The first time you talked with him you could see a sincere shock on his face

Secco likes you

Well, as long as you keep some sugar cubes in your pocket, he likes you

If you forgot, well, he won't even look at you

But if it's a good day, he'll listen your crazy stories from SP

He likes your boldness

(And yeah he doesn't care about no cussing rule too)

Carne is really nice to you

He's not really talkative, so most of the time he just listens

Carne's not sure if most of the stories are true, but he still listens

Like kid there's no way you're friend came back from the dead

And your friend didn't eat chili made out of his enemy's parents

Right??

You sure didn't impress Diavolo

But don't take it personal

It's impossible to impress him anyway

Not gonna lie, he's really distant

Like you saw him one time and that's it

But Doppio always makes sure to spend some time with you

It's a rare occasion, of course

Just please, don't cuss around him

And try not to use dark humour

[c34l3ss-w4tch3r]

lmao, me? Guzh about a crazed zurgon eith green hair and a human pet named Secco?

Absolutely.

BRO THEY ARE LIKE, ZO FUCKING CUTE. Like, i know people would honeztly be pretty weirded out at the fact I find them attractive, but c'mon!! Have you zeen them??

I would juzt love to be their lil lover.

I know for a fact Cioccolata probably would be a decent partner becauze, do you zee the way he treatz Secco? Like, yez zir!! Pleaze love me!!

But alzo knowing them,if I even tried to ztart a relationzhip with them, I'd end up on that operating table and zoon be dead, but IDC, i love thoze two freakz with all my heart.

[admrlthundrbolt]

Voices In My Head (Secco x Chubby Reader)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Secco is distracted, Cioccolata investigates.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi guy, I'm back at it.

I just want someone to stick up for Secco and put Cioccolata in his place. So I made this, hope you enjoy.

---------------------------------------------------------

Cioccolata was annoyed. Something had all but captured Secco's attention. He wasn’t the best to keep on task in the first place, at least without a pocketful of sugar cubes. Lately though, it seemed like that couldn't even reign him in.

No, something was different and Cioccolata was going to find the source of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You had received an assignment from Pericolo. Gather some details on an enemy stand user that was getting in the boss's way. Happy that it appeared to be a simple task, you left with a skip in your step.

“(Y/N)!“

The familiar raspy voice made your mood skyrocket. “Secco!” You braced yourself for what was coming. He collided into you, but your footing held.

He nuzzled into your plush form, head planted firmly between your ample breast. “Missed you.” Then he started grabbing at your bag.

“Hold on buddy. You can’t go through my stuff like that.” You said in a reprimanding tone.

He shrunk back and whined. “But you always have treats.”

You shook your head with a grin. “Of course I have something for my favorite guy, but you have to ask nicely.”

He nodded quickly. “Can I please have a treat.” Going out of his way to make a puppy face.

“How can I say no to a face like that.“ You then handed him a box of assorted candies.

Cioccolata stayed back to observe the interaction and was disgusted. This must be the distraction that had Secco off task so often. It was undoing all his hard training. Although, now that he got a look at you, you would be quite the specimen. All soft curves and cheery disposition, you could be entertaining to break.

But what in the world were you doing at headquarters. You must be some new underling. All the easier to pick you off.

“Secco, why don’t you introduce me to your little friend.“

“Yeah yeah. This is (Y/N), she has the best treats.”

“Hi, you must be Cioccolata. It's nice to finally put a face to the name.“ She puts out her hand for a shake.

He grabs it and is surprised when she meets his force equally. Her face shows no sign of pain. After a couple of stilted shakes he releases her hand. This was interesting, she knew of him. So not as new as he had assumed. Perhaps she was some in a similar line of work as himself.

“I’m surprised i’ve never heard of you. Especially with how enamored Secco seems.”

“Yeah, he’s such a sweet guy.”

He didn't enjoy how you skirted his probing. But they had to see someone about a job. So he excused themselves and had to practically drag Secco away from you. You waved and cheerily walked off.

He was going to keep an eye on you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next time you met was once again at the assignment manor. Where you had a confectionery for Secco and paid Cioccolata little to no mind. Until he interjected himself into the situation. At which point you would greet him then take your leave.

This pattern continues for a few more meetings. Cioccolata could feel his mind coming unhinged. With every passing interaction, he could see Secco's training ebb more and more.

So that led to this moment. Him waiting, by himself, for you to return to your aparment.

It has been fairly easy to trail you. Find out a few of your routines and of course where you resided.

Your home was cozy. A simple color scheme, with personal flair scattered about. A predictable kind of living space. Maybe you weren't as interesting as he had given you credit for.

He didn't have to wait long for your return. The deadbolt turned, he felt sweat unexpectedly bead on the back of his neck. You swung the door open a sharp twinge traveled up his spine. As you stepped in and shut the door behind you, his sudden urge to hide was inhuman. It swallowed him in an unbearable pit.

As she walked away from the door and turned to smile at him. “I was wondering when you would show up.”

Through gritted teeth he said. “I should be the one saying that.” It seemed to take all his will power to say. She came closer, he could hear his pulse in his ears. “You’re probably curious about what's happening right now.“ Your smile widened. “Aren’t you Doctor.”

When she touched his hand, he flinched away. It was as if a shock traveled throughout his entire nervous system. “Hhhow?” He said amid chattering teeth.

“Oh, it's a bit of hormone control. My stand Falling In Reverse has a way with hormonal levels.“ You walked near him and grasped his shoulders. “Now, I want you to remember this feeling.“ You gripped tighter, hearing a pop, your smile grew sadistic. “This sensation. I’m the bosses top espionage agent for a reason. Another doctor wouldn't be as hard to come by.”

“You bitch.“ He said in a snarl.

With a cackle, you sat yourself in his lap. He was elated, you had lowered yourself. Yet nothing happened. Green Day couldn't be activated. Was it the carnal fear within him?

Then as suddenly as it has come, the sensation left him. He gulped for air, not realizing how his lungs were burning, until that moment.

She tilted his chin up and inched closer. “Let this be a lesson for you, Doctor.”

With that she threw him from her home. He fled back to his hideaway, an ever present fear gnawing at his nerves.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You shut the door, after receiving a new assignment, with your shoulders slumped. It was outside of the country, so you’d have to travel by plane. It was going to be a nuisance, but the other bits seemed easy enough. Feel out a potential business partner before the boss made a deal with them.

Still the thought of going on a plane annoyed you. Hormone control was a pain with the air system in planes.

Rounding a corner, you saw something that perked up your mood. Secco and Cioccolata were at the front desk, talking to an nervous front clerk. You smiled as you thought to give them a special greeting.

Cioccolata was berating the paper pushing idiot for not having their paperwork ready. It should be a simple pick up, but nothing was ready. He had called ahead. Hoping he would strategically miss you.

He felt his pulse suddenly raise. It was because he was having to deal with this moron. Then an arm wrapped around his, it made him want to jump out of his skin.

“My two favorite boys.”

His head became lighter. He realised that you had your arms entwined with both of them. Though Secco's elation was much different than his dread.

“(Y/N)! Where have you been?”

“ Around, but I should be asking you that. I feel like you’ve been avoiding me. “ Cioccolata want to wipe that pout off your face, but knew that his anxiety wouldn't give him the chance.

“We would never. Cioccolata has a lot of important work lately.”

“ I guess I can let it slide then. I have some time before my flight. Why don’t we spend some time together. “You said it as a statement. Looking between the two, you received no negative answer. “Come on, I know a great gelato place close by.”

[dark-side-blog3]

I’m literally being waterboarded with my own pleghm cuz I can’t cough hard enough to clear anything without popping my stitches @~@

I gotta figure out a fic to put this in because this is a fucking miserable experience, and Cioccolatas darling will have to endure this. Similar to how my surgeons didn’t wanna wait for my cold to pass, neither will Cio. Death by common cold, so says me.

Cios darling will die from surgery complications.