#chuckle sandwich fanfic

[lettucing]

look of love, rush of blood | chapter one

words: ~4.3k | pairing: jschlatt x she/her reader

summary: What starts as a reluctant outing with friends takes a turn when you accidentally spill a stranger's drink at the bar.

notes: FIRST CHAPTER IS HERE WOOOO!!!! hope u guys enjoy this (not so) lil intro while i get into the good stuff... >:]

⭑

"Y/N! COME ON, THE UBER IS HERE!" 

“Shit. Where the hell is it?” You think, frantically digging through your makeup bag for your favorite lipstick. You’re racing against the clock, determined to finish your look before your roommate decides to leave without you. “Sorry! I’m coming!” you call out, your voice tinged with urgency.

You sigh a breath of relief as you finally spot the lipstick, buried deep in the bag like it’s playing hide-and-seek.  You apply it as quickly yet precisely as you can, topping it with the matching lip gloss. You step back and give yourself one more look over in the vanity mirror, mostly satisfied with your outfit, and give your hair one last tussle for good measure. 

Just as you grab your bag and phone the door swings open, revealing your roommate Joelle, her expression a mix of excitement and mild panic. “Y/N, did you hear me? We’re late! The others are already waiting!” You barely have time to process her words before rushing out the door behind her. “Agh! I lost track of time!” you exclaim, locking the door to your apartment with a sense of urgency. “It’s fine! We just need to hurry before the bar gets too crowded,” Joelle replies, her smile reassuring you as you dash down the stairs, not having time to spare to wait for the elevator. 

When you reach the bottom floor, you glance through the glass front doors of your apartment complex to see your Uber driver waiting at the curb. “Oh, thank god he waited,” you mutter, relief washing over you. You and Joelle hop in the back seat, your thoughts wandering while your roommate makes small talk with the driver.

Going out wasn’t really what you had in mind for tonight. After a grueling week at work, you envisioned a peaceful Friday evening at home, possibly even treating yourself to your favorite takeout. You had already changed into comfy sweatpants and settled in with your laptop when Joelle got home, practically bouncing with excitement. She eagerly proposed a night out for drinks with your mutual friends, Sage and Alana, at a bar and lounge you’d never been to before. The thought of braving a crowded bar was the last thing you wanted. But as she continued to plead her case, you found yourself wavering. With a resigned sigh, you finally agreed, knowing deep down that it wouldn’t be so bad. There was something therapeutic about getting pretty for a fun night out with your friends- the couch will always be there when you get back.

When the car finally pulled up to the bar, the vibrant energy spilled out onto the sidewalk. Music pulsed faintly through the air, and the sounds of the bustling city enveloped you as you stepped out. Taking a deep breath, you followed Joelle inside. As you stepped into the trendy lounge, the warm glow of hanging lights illuminated the room, buzzing with activity; people chatting at the high-top tables and booths, others leaned against the bar, drinks in hand. A disco ball hung from the ceiling above the small dance floor at the back of the room where a few brave souls were already swaying to the rhythm of the music spilling from the speaker system.

Joelle turned to you. “I’m gonna get us some drinks. Sage and Alana are right over there.” She points you to a cozy corner where your friends were already gathered, their laughter standing out to you amongst the buzz of the room. As you approached, the couple's familiar faces filled you with warmth, easing the lingering reluctant nerves from earlier.

“Finally!” Sage called out, grinning. “We were starting to wonder if you guys were actually gonna show up.” You grinned, settling into the booth on the opposite side of your friends. “It took me a minute to get ready! I was already in my sweats when Joelle nearly started dragging me out of the apartment by my ankles.”

“Worth it, though, right?” she teased, raising her drink in a mock toast.

You chuckled, glancing around the bustling bar. The warm glow of the lights, combined with the upbeat music, started to lift your spirits. “I guess it’s not so bad.” 

Just then, Joelle slid into the booth beside you, her smile wide and infectious. “A vodka-cran for the lady!” she declared in a mock-old-timey British accent, placing a glass in front of you. “Why, thank you, dear!” you replied in the same accent, laughing before shifting back to your normal tone.  “I’ll get you back later?” Joelle just grinned. “Nah, consider that my thank you gift for changing out of those ratty-ass sweatpants.” You gasped dramatically, placing a hand over your heart. “Excuse me? Those ‘ratty-ass sweatpants’ are my favorite comfy pants! A beloved staple of my wardrobe!” “Staple? More like a fashion crime,” Alana shot back, laughing. “But hey, the outfit you swapped them for is adorable!” You roll your eyes with a grin and take another sip of your drink. “You guys suck.”

The four of you sat and talked for a long while after that, sharing stories, teasing one another, and catching up on all the latest happenings in your lives. Sage had plenty of horrifying encounters to recall from her job as a daycare instructor, while Alana shared the latest drama on who was hooking up with who at her office staff parties. Joelle insisted on a second round of drinks, and before long, you felt that familiar warm buzz starting to settle in.

As you finished your second drink, Joelle leaned forward over the table, a playful grin on her face. “Okay, not to change the subject, but that dance floor is getting full and I think we need to go dance.”

You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Joelle's sudden enthusiasm. “Oh yeah?”

“Absolutely! Come on, dance with me!” Joelle said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. 

You took another sip of your drink, weighing the idea. The music pulsed through the bar, calling to you. “Alright, let’s do it!” you said, feeling a surge of spontaneity.

Joelle shot up from her seat, her confidence contagious to not just you but to Sage and Alana as well. The three of you followed Joelle’s lead, and as you made your way toward the dance floor, you felt a mix of nerves and exhilaration. 

With the music thumping around you, you stepped onto the dance floor, letting the rhythm guide your movements. Joelle began to sway, her energy infectious. You couldn’t help but smile as you joined in, letting the music wash over you. As you lost yourself in the rhythm, the energy of the dance floor enveloped you. Your friends’ shouts mixed with the beats, and you could feel the weight of the world slip away. The crowd moved in sync, bodies swaying and spinning. You jumped to the beat with your friends, singing carelessly. 

After god knows how many songs, you realized you needed two things: a moment to sit down and another drink. Your friends were still bouncing around, showing no signs of slowing down anytime soon. Leaning in toward the group, you raised your voice a bit over the music. “Hey, I’m heading to sit at the bar for a minute. Do you guys need anything?” Joelle flashed a wide smile, clearly a bit more buzzed than you. “We’re all good, babe!” With a playful wink, Joelle added, “There’s a really pretty guy I've got my eye on. Let us know if you need anything, okay?” You smiled back. “Of course, good luck! Love you!” you shouted as you turned toward the bar. “Love you more!” Sage called after you.

As you made your way across the lounge floor, you suddenly became aware of the slight sway in your step. You quickly settled onto the last empty barstool all the way at the very end of the bar, next to someone you didn’t pay much mind to.

As you sat for a moment waiting for the bartender, you turned in your stool to glance back at your friends. Sage and Alana were dancing together right in the middle of the dance floor, while Joelle had already moved off to the side, chatting with a tall brunette guy wearing glasses and a couple of chunky rings. They seemed to be hitting it off, and you couldn’t help but smile at your friend’s confidence. Damn, you thought. You’d be lying if you said your roommate had bad taste in men. 

As you turned around, your hand collided with the bartender’s just as she was setting a drink down next to you, causing her to drop the glass and spill its contents across the bar- and into the lap of the man sitting next to you.. “Oh shit, I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, quickly facing her. She waved her hand dismissively. “No worries at all.” She looked at the man sitting next to you. “I’ll grab you some paper towels and make you another one. Just give me a sec.”

You put your head in your hand, a wave of embarrassment washing over you as she handed the man a roll of paper towels. You sighed to yourself, figuring you should apologize to the stranger next to you for being an idiot. As you shifted on your stool to face him completely, your breath caught in your throat.

Shit.

He glanced back at you, thick eyebrows arching over warm brown eyes framed by long lashes. Messy brown curls peeked out from under a Yankees baseball cap, and he sported well-groomed mutton chops and a mustache. The intensity of his gaze combined with his broad shoulders gave off an intimidating presence that made you feel another wave of shame for spilling his drink- but damn, was he handsome.

“I’m so sorry about that. I was watching my friends, plus I’m a little buzzed— I just wasn’t thinking straight.” you stammer as he palms his thighs with the paper towels, feeling your nerves kick in. The man smiled slightly, placing the used paper towels down on the bar as he finished wiping off.  “Don’t sweat it, ’s just a drink. I’ve had worse nights in bars.”

You mentally thank whatever higher power is watching over you for letting you spill a drink on someone easygoing instead of a hotheaded jerk. “I still feel bad." You smile nervously. You pause, a silence hanging heavy over the two of you. You glance at him, and the two of you lock eyes.

You can't tell if it's the liquor, the eye contact, or both- but something in you pushes to make small talk.

Shifting your weight in your seat, you raise an eyebrow. "Well, okay, how much worse of a night are we talking here?” He chuckled reluctantly, as if he were unsure about sharing the story. “Well, there was this one time I saw a girl getting hit on by some creep, she looked really uncomfortable. After a few drinks, I guess I tend to get a little bold, so I decided to tell him to back off.” He paused, shifting his weight leaning on the bar. “Turns out, he was her boyfriend.” You winced. “Oof…” “Yeah.” He nodded, laughing a bit. “He almost kicked my ass. I finished my drink and got the fuck outta there.” You smiled, thinking about how he went out of his way to make sure a girl he didn’t even know wasn’t in danger. “At least you tried to help her,” you said. “That counts for something, right?” He shrugged, a hint of humility in his smile. “I guess so. But it’s funny how quickly things can turn, y’know? One minute you think you're doin’ the right thing, and the next, you're just trying to dodge a punch. Literally or metaphorically.” You nod with a smile. “Yeah, I get that completely.” He nodded back, and the conversation faded for a moment. 

You glanced at him. “I’m Y/N, by the way.” 

He returned your gaze, a slight smile appearing on his face again. “Schlatt.” 

As if on cue, the bartender brought over his replacement drink, and you reached into your pocket for some cash. “Here, let me pay for that.” you offered, and he waved a dismissive hand. “Nah, it’s okay. I already have quite the tab running with my buddies.” Before you can protest, he holds up a finger and grabs the glass, taking a sip of what was presumably whiskey. You watch his expression as he drinks, noting how his nose scrunched slightly as he downed the liquor. He places the glass back on the counter with a soft clink. “Agh, that’s some good shit.” he sighs, lifting his hat to run a hand through his curls before placing it back on. Your cheeks warm- you blame it on the alcohol.

 “Can I buy you a drink?” Schlatt asked after taking another sip, and you laugh, shaking the heated feeling from your face. “Do you always buy a drink for someone when they spill liquor in your lap?” He shrugged with a smile, a playful glint in his eyes. “Only the ones who make a memorable first impression. You shoulda' seen your face when it spilled, you looked like you had just shot me or somethin'. It was fuckin’ hilarious.” You rolled your eyes, laughing along. “Yeah, well, I wasn’t exactly aiming for comedy tonight. But I guess I’ll take it as a compliment.”

“Hey, every night out on the town needs a lil’ bit of chaos,” he said, leaning his forearms against the bar again. “Makes for better stories later.” You grinned. “Yeah, you got me there.”

Schlatt tilted his head, gesturing towards the bar. “So, what’ll it be?” You laughed. “You really wanna buy me that drink, huh?” He holds his hands up in mock surrender. “I mean if you’re passin’ up on a free drink, be my guest.” You smirked, weighing your options. “Alright, alright. When you put it like that...” You pick up the cocktail menu, and Schlatt scoffs. “Oh, you’re one of those.” You cocked an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?” “Nothing!” He grinned. “I just didn’t think you were the type to go for a thirty-dollar, ninety-percent-ice, hangover-waiting-to-happen kinda’ drink.” You narrow your eyes playfully. “Yeah, well,” You signal over the bartender. “Fine, asshole. We just met, there’s a lot you don’t know about me.” You feel Schlatt’s gaze linger on you as you order yourself an Old Fashioned, his look long and heavy. “I guess so.” He grins, and orders himself another whiskey.

⭑

“So, what do you do when you’re not out like this?” you ask, genuinely curious. He makes an indifferent face. “Honestly, not much. I work a lot, and when I’m not working, I don’t really go out unless I have a reason.” You nod. “What’s your reason tonight?” 

Before he could continue, a loud voice booms from behind the two of you.

“SCHLATT! THERE YOU ARE, YA BASTARD!” Schlatt gives you a look, as if to say “there’s my reason”. 

A tall man walks up and drapes an arm around Schlatt’s shoulders, clearly tipsy- then you recognize him.  The guy Joelle was talking to. 

Oh shit. Is he one of Schlatt’s friends?

“Get ‘offa me, dude.” Schlatt groans, his whole demeanor changing as he unravels the man’s arm from his shoulders. “What?” He questions. The other man laughs. “Nothin’ man. We were just wonderin’ where you were. We haven’t seen you in a while.” Schlatt rolls his eyes. “Yeah, ‘cause I don’t wanna be seen with you three making yourself look stupid on that dance floor.” The man chuckles, unfazed. “C’mon, you know you love it. We’ve got the moves!” He gestures dramatically, demonstrating some ridiculous dance move. “And, for the record, there’s a beautiful lady over there that’s been chattin’ me up for a while.”

“Yeah, okay. You’re drunk, Ted. ‘Ya sure that beautiful lady isn’t just Tucker?” Schlatt retorts, crossing his arms. 

You can’t help but laugh at their banter, knowing he was talking about Joelle. 

The tall guy, who you’ve come to learn is named Ted, turns to you, an amused expression on his face. “Oh, i see what’s goin’ on here.” Schlatt rolls his eyes again, somehow harder than the last time. “Dude, can you not?” Ted raises his hands in mock surrender (the same way Schlatt had earlier- the two seemed to share a handful of mannerisms), a grin spreading across his face. “Just making an observation! Looks like you’ve found yourself a partner in crime.”

“More like an accomplice to my embarrassment,” Schlatt mutters, shaking his head. You chuckle, still enjoying the playful back-and-forth. “I dunno, this is kinda funny.” “See? She gets it!” Ted interjects, grinning at you. “I’m Ted.” He extends his hand, and you shake it loosely. “Y/N,” you reply with a smile.

“Nice to meet you.” Ted continues as you break the handshake. “Anyways, Schlatt. C’mon man. You gotta come out there with us.” “Pass,” Schlatt says, shaking his head. “I’m good right here.”

“Suit yourself! You’ll regret it!” Ted shrugs, stepping back- he glances at you, then back at Schlatt.

“Regret? Not in this lifetime,” Schlatt takes a long sip of his whiskey. “Wrap it up. I wanna go to bed.” Ted rolls his eyes. “Alright Captain Buzzkill.” He claps Schlatt on the back. “Give us 10 minutes.” He turns to you “Nice to meet you, uh…” You smile. “Y/N.” “Right. Y/N. Sorry. Had a few drinks.” Ted returns your smile and heads back to join the crowd on the dancefloor, leaving you and Schlatt at the bar once again.

You shoot Schlatt a look, as if to say “Well that was something.”  

“Welcome to my life,” he sighs, rolling his eyes playfully. “Always a spectacle.”

 “Looks like you’ve got quite the crew,” you say, taking a sip of your drink.

“Tell me about it.” Schlatt shakes his head with a slight smile. “They’re here visiting. They’re a bit much sometimes, But they’re my guys.” The two of you turn and watch Ted blend back into the swaying mass of bodies, reconvening with Joelle and who you presumed to be another one of Schlatt's friends.

“Wanna know something funny?” you ask. Schlatt hums, intrigued. “That girl your friend has been talking to? She’s my roommate.” Schlatt laughs. “No fuckin’ shot.” You nod. “Yup. Her name’s Joelle. Sweetest girl on the planet.” He shakes his head. “What a coincidence, eh?” You stare into your drink. “Yeah, crazy.”

The two of you chat for a bit longer and you discover that Schlatt makes a living through YouTube and streaming, which you think is incredibly cool. He mentions that a bunch of other content creators are currently in New York for a Twitch event, hence the reason Ted and Charlie were staying at his apartment. After asking him a million-and-a-half questions about it, you share that you’re a journalist, writing articles for local NYC art magazines. He asks you questions too, and you can’t quite tell if he’s genuinely interested or just really good at faking it, but either way, you feel heard. The conversation flows effortlessly, jumping from topic to topic like you’d known each other for years. It was comforting, in a way.

Ted reappears as you’re laughing at something Schlatt said, this time with two others behind him- the rest of Schlatt’s friends. Ted places a ringed hand on Schlatt’s shoulder. “Not tryin’ to break this up, just letting you know- we’re ready to go when you are.” Schlatt nods and downs the last of his whiskey, that familiar slight scrunch of his nose making an appearance again. You might’ve called it adorable if you hadn’t just met him. 

He settles his tab and stands from his barstool with a sigh, looking at you. You smile. “It was nice meeting you. Thanks for the drink.” He returns your smile tiredly, as if the liquor had just hit him all at once. “Yeah, you too. No problem.” Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Ted’s eyes widen as he elbows one of his friends— maybe Tucker?— in the side.

“I’ll, uh… i'll see you around,” Schlatt says, nodding before heading off. You give him a slight wave, then wave at Ted as well.

 As they’re walking away, you hear Schlatt mutter- “Finally ready to part with your sweet Joelle?” Ted shot him a look of pure confusion. “What the fuck? how do you know her name?” You laugh, still amused by their ridiculous interactions. Before long, the four of them are out the door.

You sit at the bar for a moment longer, finishing your drink. You decide to get up to find Joelle, along with Sage and Alana. You spot them standing near the booth the four of you shared at the beginning of the night. As you approach them, Joelle’s eyes light up. “Hey pretty lady! Havin’ a good night?” You smile. “Yeah, starting to get tired though. You guys ready to go?” Sage nods. “Yeah, i’m ready to call it a night. Maybe we can grab some food before we go home?” Alana chimes in. “Yummmm, A late-night snack sounds perfect right now.” 

The four of you gather your things and split the tab from your drinks earlier. As you all head toward the exit, you can’t help but glance back at the bar, thinking about the guys you met earlier. You wondered if you might run into Schlatt and his friends again- the night still felt full of possibilities.

You and your friends discover a cozy little gelato shop a short walk down the road, where you all sit together and enjoy your treats. Eventually, it was time to call it a night, and you exchanged tipsy hugs and cheek kisses before you all ordered your Ubers, you and Joelle heading back to your apartment while Sage and Alana made their way to theirs. 

⭑

As you unlocked the door to your apartment, Joelle walked in and flopped onto the couch with a satisfied sigh- she was definitely a bit closer to drunk than you were. You smiled and sat down next to her legs. “Was tonight everything you wanted it to be?” She turned to face you, excitement sparkling in her eyes. “Hell yeah! I had such a blast! And did you see that guy I was talking to?! Oh my god.” You chuckled, recalling the conversation you had with Ted and Schlatt. “Oh, I definitely saw him.” Joelle giggled. “His name is Ted. He’s from Los Angeles, can you believe it? AND I got his number. Maybe if things work out I'll convince him to stay here.” You laughed, astonished at her already growing attachment to this stranger from the bar. “Maybe.” Joelle sat up, leaning her arm on your shoulder. “Hey, wait a second! Don’t act like you weren’t chatting someone up too! I saw you and Mr. tall-dark-and-broody at the bar.” 

You raised an eyebrow, trying to suppress a grin. “Mr. tall-dark-and-broody? That’s quite the title.” Joelle nudged you playfully. “Come on! You know you were vibing with him. What was his name?” 

You could feel Joelle’s gaze probing, urging you to say more about the guy you’d spent nearly two hours chatting with. Eventually, she cracked you, and a smile crept across your face. “Okay, fine. His name was Schlatt, and maybe he was really, really attractive. But I wasn’t talking to him, we were just… having a conversation, y’know?”

Joelle raised her eyebrows. “Schlatt? I think Ted said that was the name of his friend that he’s staying with.” You avoided eye contact, not sure what to say.

After a moment of silence, Joelle gasped. “Oh! Oh my god! He’s-, they’re-,” she grabs your shoulders. “Your guy is friends with my guy!” “He’s not my guy!” You interject, and Joelle waves her hand. “Yeah, okay, whatever. Anyway, ‘just having a conversation’, huh? You sure you weren’t flirting a little?” You roll your eyes. “No! I wasn’t! It all started in the first place because I wasn’t paying attention and knocked his whiskey into his lap.” 

“Oooh, a whiskey guy. That’s hot.” Joelle giggled. “Okay, you’re definitely drunk and totally missing the point.” you said, laughing as you slung your arm around her shoulders. “That doesn’t matter! I don’t need to be sober to tell you that you should text him back the moment he reaches out. I could feel the chemistry from the dance floor.”

Suddenly, a realization hit you.

 “Shit. He’s not going to text me. I didn’t give him my number.”

“WHAT?!”

⭑

After Joelle started to crash, you helped her change into pajamas and remove her makeup, and once she crawled into bed, you did the same for yourself. As you stared in the mirror at your bare face, your thoughts drifted back to Schlatt. You kicked yourself mentally for not offering him your number, but you told yourself it was fine. If fate wanted it to happen, it would. Sometimes, you meet a beautiful stranger and never see them again—that's just how life goes.

Then you remembered that your best friend and his best friend had really hit it off. Even though you didn’t give him your number tonight, it was bound to come up eventually if Joelle and Ted stuck it out. You started spiraling, envisioning yourself ten years down the line at Joelle and Ted’s wedding—locking eyes with Schlatt across the dance floor, remembering that one conversation the two of you shared ten years ago at some random bar before you left New York City and fell off the grid, and-

You stopped yourself. What the hell was that? You sigh and glance at yourself in the mirror again, thinking, “I’m still tipsy, and I really need to go to bed.” 

As you settle beneath your covers and close your eyes, you hear your phone buzz on the nightstand—an unusual vibration pattern that signals it’s Joelle. “I thought she was asleep?” you wonder. But as you read her message, your heart skips a beat.

jelly<3: texting ted jelly<3: he said he had a lot of fun tonight jelly<3: and schlatt did too ;) jelly<3: bet ur glad u came out with us!!!!!!!!!! i love u

Your heart flutters thinking about Schlatt again. Unable to think of a better response, you quickly type one out and toss your phone back on the nightstand, switching it to Do Not Disturb mode this time.

you: go to bed!!!!!

You drift off to sleep, trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach.

Shit.

[mister-sandwich]

GREAT TIMING ACTUALLY.

[sillybabybear]

𝔥𝔞𝔲𝔫𝔱𝔢𝔡

🍓 tw // eensie weensie slight death mention

💐 ChuckleTrio // tagged with 🥪༘ ChuckleWriting

🍧 reader details // gn minor reader, child of 🥪!Ted

You were the child of the once infamous Ted Nivison, and despite his violent reputation, you had no qualms with this. Your father and mother treated you well and gave you a good life. Your childhood was fairly normal and honestly idyllic. You knew of your father's past being a dark one which he didn't discuss, and that was fine by you. All you knew was that once he was bad, but now? He was a fantasic father. And you loved him all the same. As far back as your memory would allow, though, you'd never been alone. In dreams and in daily life, an unfamiliar face would show itself, seemingly accompanying you constantly. Your father, at your young age, wrote this off as an imaginary friend.

"Why, kids your age have imaginary friends all the time, kiddo! It's nothing to worry about! Does he have a name?" Your response, sounding more lighthearted now that you'd been assured of your normalcy, was "Charlie! He says his name is Charlie!!"

The familiar name sent a subtle shiver down Ted's spine, but he hid it from you. That night, he texted Schlatt, who was on a similar, reformed path.

"Hey Schlatt..?" he quickly typed, requesting to call, slightly frantic. He'd been keeping this down all day, yet he had a sneaking suspicion there was more to this. Schlatt disagreed, reassuring him, "Ted, it's nothin'. Yer just paranoid. Charlie's been gone for years now. 's a common name, yeah? Its not like he's hauntin' yer kid or somethin'!" Ted heard this comforting rationalization and agreed, and the two mostly never spoke of the ordeal beyond a passing mention as an in-joke.

Charlie, though? He had other plans. All of a sudden, the imaginary friend went from primary school, to elementary. Then, Middle. And...high school. You were also painfully aware of how unusual such a thing was. And so you never mentioned it to you parents, or friends, or...anybody.

"Y/N!" Charlie exclaimed, turning to face you. The light of your laptop was bright against his face. Your eyes shifted from the heavy textbook in front of you to look and see what had him calling for you, and you questioned if he had found anything useful. Hey, this may be odd, but he helped you with homework, so you're not complaining!

"Yeah, check it out." He said, highlighting a specific paragraph. You thanked him and took notes, marking the website for future reference. "No problem, kid! What can I say, im the best in the business."

"Sweetie, Dinner's ready!" Called a blissfully unaware Ted from the kitchen, prompting you to stand up.

"Sorry Charlie, I gotta go." you said, and he responded with a begrudging sigh. "Okay, okay...I'll see you in a bit, then."

"See you, Charles!" And with that, you were off to Dinner, leaving Charlie to think over his current dilemma which he always found his mind wandering to when he was left unattended.

Would he ever be able to pass on..?

Hey, if you read this far, thanks bunches! I dont really write on tumblr, this is my first time! I hope it turned out okay, and sorry for the length, i dunno how to do them fancy cut off things i see other folks doin!! If you have any (polite) tips on writing or formatting, please let me know!! have a nice day/night, ya'll! (also i may do a sequel if i feel the need/its requested)

[renranram]

Maid dress

nsfw!!

schlatt jerking off to reader while she's streaming, obvi inspired when j bought wenston some maid outfits and people were calling him his sugar daddy lols

a/n ; 886 words :)

reader flaunts herself at the camera, spinning whilst she tries on the maid outfit schlatt had bought her, " chat, do i look pretty? " she smiles as she assembles the outfit

meanwhile schlatt was on the call with her, eyes immensely focused on her live stream, " jesus fuck, you look worse " he mutters as reader glares at him through the camera

" well, you bought this for me, so maybe it's not me who's the problem " she rolls her eyes at him as schlatt chuckles, not taking his eyes off his screen once

the two had been close friends for over a year now, meeting through, shamefully, the dsmp, the duo are very different ccs on their own, reader being more into makeup and gaming whilst schlatt's varies

ever since they first met on the server the two just sparked a connection, coming off as frenemies for the public, a banter of theirs but exactly off camera, it was a whole different story

schlatt is reader's sugar daddy

at first reader would just joke about being broke, " oh my fucking godd it's so pretty but i dont wanna waste my money ", " that's so fucking expensive ", " okay im broke " until schlatt got tired and actually offered her to be her sugar daddy

at first reader thought it was a joke, a silly new banter for them but nope!, every week, new parcels would arrive on the streamer's doorstep with small notes, but chat doesn't know that, chat doesn't need to know that

" fine, ill get you a new one done " he mumbles, as he scrolls through amazon, " anime french maid apron lolita fancy dress cosplay costume furry cat ear gloves socks set " he reads out the title causing reader to chuckle as they wear the stockings for the uniform

" oh it comes in pink " he added as reader smiles, " i like pink " she replies as schlatt scoffs, " of course you do "

as the girl sits down on her bed to wear the stockings, schlatt's eyes linger down on her bare thighs, enjoying the view as he leans back on his chair

" do you need something else too? " he mutters as reader gasps, " oh my gosh! you should buy me that uhm... blaire doll thing " she smiles as schlatt shakes his head, " blaire doll thing? " he repeats her, " the fuck is that? "

reader tries to wear the collar to complete the look, " it's like a doll! " she states as she grabs her phone to show off the picture

" that's an ugly looking doll " he mutters, as he gulps, looking down at his now hard on, unironically finding reader in a whole cat maid dress... hot

" more uglier than you are " she retorts as he chuckles, " guess no more doll for you then " schlatt replies, shrugging as reader gasps, now pouting

" im kiddingggg pleaseee buy me one? " she pleads looking at the camera as her live chat speeds up, " .. fuck.. " he groans out, not loud enough for his mic to pick up, him slowly sliding in his hand inside his shorts

" please please please " she continues, as she reads off the chat, " please jschlatt senpai " she bursts out laughing, mentally cringing as schlatt chuckles, " ..fine "

" yay! chat! we fucking wonnn! " she celebrates as she jumps around the frame, clasping her hands together, " we're the best at this shit " she shrugs, smug, unaware that the man she's in a call with is already jerking off to her

" reader.., think im gonna mute for a sec, gotta do something " he mumbles as reader nods, understanding, " bet, im gonna talk with chat for a bit " she smiles, as schlatt immediately mutes himself

" fuck.. what a fucking whore.. i didn't actually think she'd do a stream " schlatt chuckles, amused as he palms himself, as reader did what she said, interacting with her audience

" what a pretty slut holy shit " he chuckles, clearly amused as he bites his lip, his rough hand playing with his dick

" chat i look so pretty right? " reader asks, fixing her hair as chat spams yes, " you damn sure are " he mumbles, as he grabs the base of his cock, using his saliva for lube

" ah fuck, fucking.. so fucking pretty " he breathes out, his body shuddering slightly as he jerks himself off, his eyes never leaving her

" fuck.. fuck.. " schlatt throws his head back as he leans back on his chair, fastening his pace, " stupid fucking whore.. "

he moans out, lifting his shirt up, as he continues to palm himself at the sight of her, he's never gonna buy her those stupid costumes again

or maybe he'll rain her with more gifts, then maybe a flight to texas so she can show everything off to him... maybe

his lashes flutter, fastening his already fast pace as he continues to moan, " stupid fucking slut, .. shit... pretty- pretty whore " he stammers

he can feel his precum leaking as reader talks with her chat, innocent yet suggestive, that stupid maid dress, if schlatt can immediately fly to london, he fucking would, he'd immediately bend her over, not caring if she was streaming or not and fuck her like some animal

" ah fuck! " he moans loudly, his semen, spurting on his keyboard making a fucking mess, " shit... " he groans out

maybe instead of ordering her a new costume, maybe he'll fly her out instead

[pequins]

IRL P0RN VISUALS 🔗

cont : slimecicle , ted nivison & jschlatt .

MDNI NSFW AHEAD

all vids are from twitter , you might have to log in to see them.

( more to be added when i find them )

SCHLATT

a/n : he looks so fucking good in this video im gonna chew on him

schlatt giving you a punishment for being a brat

( LC ) schlatt jerking vid

teasing / c^nt slapping

sub!schlatt org4sm denial

CHARLIE

c^nt slapping

against the desk

size difference

TED NIVISION

f!ngering

p^ssy eating

size difference

[schlattslonghairytoes]

can i come over?

when schlatt moves to texas an unexpected storm leaves him with no where to go, will you offer up a room to your friend?

streamer reader x streamer schlatt

you had lived in texas since you attended college at texas a and m

orginally you went to ithica college, but you transfered during your sophmore year

you now had your own apartment as you were out of college

you knew a couple of other content creators who lived in the area, but not many

your closest friend, ted nivison, lived in los angeles, but you went to visit him every now and again

your phone rang, "gangnum style" blasting in your ears and groaned, you reached for your phone, only to be met with a picture of you and theodore from college freshman year

"i need your help guppie." teds face filled the screen and his dopey smile made you laugh

"you woke me up mr grouper." your nicknames came from the first time you got high together and decided to watch bubble guppies

"wakey wakey! does this fit look ok?" he set the camera down and walked away from the camera, he did a little spin before grabbing his phone again

"yes you look very fashionable theo. can i go back to sleep now?" ne nodded but very quickly realized he had something else to tell you

"wait really quick, remember schlatt? you met him during the lunch club era" you scanned your sleepy memory trying to remember this guy you probably met once.

"um, tall right? good looking?" ted nodded and laughed, sitting down at his desk

"glad to hear thats what you remember. anyways, im pretty sure hes moving out to Austin in the coming months, so you guys should talk cause he only knows a handfull of people out there." ted said

"cool. can i please sleep now." your tired brain did not care for this random man barely remember.

"yes, reach out to him ok?" he smiled at the camera

"yes theodore kennedy nivison junior. love you. byeeeee" and with that you ended the call.

you didnt really think about teds call all that much, untill around 3 months later you recieved a text from an unknown number

even though schlatt then tried ghosting you, ted finally convinced him to man up and keep talking to one of the few people living where he was soon moving

over the span of a month you two had been constantly talking, to the point where you were starting to consider him as one of your closest friends

you would facetime atleast once a day, text everyday, and you even streamed twice together on your account

you were getting very excited to have a new friend so close by

then came the storm.

you lived alone with your dog, and you knew your house would not be ready for this shit.

you stalked up on food, blankets, flashlights

basically anything you could get your hands on

and you bunkered down at your house with your dog, getting ready to thug the next few days out

you were scrolling on your phone, on the first night of the storm, power already out, house fucking freezing, and you see schlatt had posted on his snap story

you open it to find a video of him yelling outside of a completely dark marriot

screaming about how thats where he is supposed to be staying

and you were getting very worried, like your new friend who youve never met in person, might deadass freeze to death.

so you did what any caring soul like yourself would do

you swipe up on his story with your address and a follow up message saying "pull up to mi casa papi 🍆 "

and hope he would hurry so you could go to bed

around twenty minutes later you layed cuddled with your dog bundled in over ten blankets

when felt your house fucking shake with how hard schlatt was banging on your door

you walked downstairs, and opened the door, to a giant, shivering, and covered in snow schlatt, who you immediatly wrapped in a hug and dragged upstairs

"c'mon lets get you nice and warm." you brought him to your room where you turned your bed into a nice warm spot for him "i have some clothes for you, they were my brothers so they should fit" you smiled up at him

he hadnt said much yet and you could see the stress seeping through his face, he dropped his stuff and kinda just hugged you.

"you ok?" you laugh as he pulls away from the hug. he smiles sadly before sitting down on your bed

"ive been better ill be honest" he laughed quietly.

"some first day here huh?" you pat him on the back, trying to comfort him.

"you could say that. holy shit i thought that was a stuffed animal" he says looking at your dog

"go change dumbass, bathrooms on the right" you watch as schlatt takes the clothes and walks to your bathroom, you think you even hearhim flick on the light switch.

"do you want a flashlight?" you yell out to him, to which you get a small "please" back in return, you laugh and leave a flashlight infront of the door

you get comfy in the small sofa in your room, as schlatt was not going to fit on it, and your other bedroom was turned into your office. but you didnt mind him taking the bed

he came out of the bathroom minutes later and quietly shut the door behind him when he turned around he was looking at you kinda funny

you began to ask what was wrong before he cut you off "absolutely not, im not kicking you off your bed, get up" he towered over you on the sofa

"schlatt shut the fuck up, your not fitting on this thing, i barely do."

"you have a king size bed, were sharing, me you and that oddly stuffed animal looking dog c'mon get a move on" he got into the bed and waited for you and your dof to follow him

you laughed and made your way over, your dog following closely behind. you flop down onto the bed and look at the man laying next to you

"crazy this is the first time we're meeting" he says getting comfy

you lay another blanket on the both of you as your dog jumps up on the bed and lays between the two of you "im glad ted introduced us" you take a moment to inspect him

you two had called on discord many times and FaceTimed, but nothing lived up to the real thing.

"im really happy he introduced us too."

guys i kinda hate how this turned out

sorry 😣 😥 😦 😧 😨 😪 😢 😞 😰 😿 🫤 ❤️‍🩹 ☹️ 😐

[manticore-fangs]

Blablablaaa schlatt fucking his kids babysitter

im sorry i havent gotten around to this.. but since i just got back into writing im loving this.

cw: breeding kink, stomach bulging? praise, f!reader, lmk if i missed any more! (i did not proofread or betaread)

schlatt shushing you and positioning you into full nelson, putting your hand over your mouth; trying to cancel the sounds that come from you.

"cmon toots, gotta be fuckin' quiet or we're gonna wake the kids." he says while thrusting up into you, hitting the perfect spot. you whimper out. "i can' schlatt, its a lot- holyyyy fuck..."

he thrust practically rough up into you even though he's trying to keep you quiet, almost like he doesn't care if you make the filthiest sounds.

you rest your head against his shoulder and began kissing his jaw, trying to muffle some of the noises at least. he starts dirty talking you, you swear he's trying to knock you up with his thrusts and his words.

"fuck toots. should've had kids with you instead of her. pussy's clenching on me so fuckin' tight- jesus- she wants my cum doesn't she? i know she does cause every time i mention the thought of breeding you she clenches up on me."

you whine and nod your head. "fuck- of course i am, love the thought of you getting me pregnant jay- love it s'fuckin' much." you look at him as he smirks, than he forces you to look down at where the two of you connect.

the schlucking noise coming from your pussy fuels you, you swear you can see an white ring forming around the base of his cock. schlatt starts dirty talking you, after the groaning and whines that come from his lips.

“shit doll- your so swollen. look at your little tummy toots, look at how its full with my loads. gonna be stuffed with babies and cock. gripping on my cock so good- jesus toots really gonna fuckin' milk me huh?" drool starts flowing down you lip and schlatt licks it up, then spitting right back into your mouth.

"you can take it doll, take my loads- shit your stomachs gettin' pudgy with every single load i knock up into ya'. i knew you were a good fuckin' girl, thought of this every time i fucked up into my fist."

the thought of him fucking his fist and wasting loads of cum makes you whine, you really wished he fucked his semen up into you, maybe you'd already be pregnant by than with his kid.

"y-you fucked your fist thinking of me? fuck thats hot.." your mind goes blank and all you can think about is schlatt just fucking a fleshlight and dumping loads into it, even though he didnt mention it- the thought still riles you up.

"oh fuck yeah- shouldnt have wasted those loads onto my hand, could've been fuckin' you so good like this." schlatt hisses through his teeth when he cums again but pushes through overstimulation, wanting to make your pussy take him.

"your womb is gonna be filled with kids, so many kids toots- fuck yeah- gonna make you a mommy, shit- your already a mother to my kids anyways, your gonna give them a sibling right? yeah- i know you will." he sees tears roll down your cheeks, watching as you sob from his talking and wanting to be pregnant with his kids.

"yeah- i wanna give them a sibling, please jay- lemme give them a sibling- fill me with your cum, ill do anything. really! ill do anything for your come." you put your hands together like your praying to god, begging for schlatts cum.

"jesus- i feel you clenching up, your gonna come on me huh? yeah- i know toots i know." he nuzzles your head than kisses the top of your head multiple times as you finally cum after three times while schlatt loses his rhythm and comes one more time in you before halting.

"did so good doll, holy fuck- not gonna pull out wanna make sure my cum takes." you both laid there in the same position for awhile. schlatts hand resting over your slightly pudgy stomach; slightly pushing it which makes you whine.

a week later, you look down at the test with two lines.

[writingduhh]

Chuckle Sammy || Falling Asleep In His Lap (HC)

(In this HC you fall asleep on their lap at a party / get together)

Leave me some detailed or vague fic requests or HC ideas plz I’m all out and I need some inspiration 😭😭😭

❥ Jschlatt:

▷ The second he notices you’re asleep he goes protection mode.

▷ He won't allow anyone within a 5-foot radius of you, fearing that their presence might wake you.

▷ He knows how hard you’ve been working lately and insists that you catch up on sleep, even if it’s at a party.

▷  Whenever someone close to you makes an obnoxiously loud noise, he'll respond with a stern glare and a finger to his lips.

▷ He tenderly traces soothing shapes on your back or arms with his fingertips.

▷ Definitely takes this opportunity to take some silly pictures. Using Snapchat filters or just terrible angles and lighting

▷ He will take some wholesome pictures too, of course. Spamming his snapchat story with your face.

▷ As the night progresses, and people get louder he makes the call to head home.

▷ He doesn't bother waking you up; instead, he simply scoops you up in his arms, carefully carrying you out to the car.

▷ On the drive home, he ensures the car stays at the perfect temperature, keeps the music volume low, and skillfully navigates around any potholes.

▷ Once home he takes it upon himself to get you ready and into bed.

Once home, he takes it upon himself to get you ready for bed. Carrying you inside from the car, he softly lays you down on your shared bed, while he rummages around the closet to find one of his hoodies for you to wear. Gently he’ll change you out of your party outfit and into his oversized hoodie, possibly waking you up in the process.

“Hm? Where are we?” You mumble very confused by the chnage in surroundings.

“Shh we’re home now toots, let’s finish getting you ready for bed.”

You easily complied as he instructed you to lift your arms, then he pulled his hoodie over you.

"There we go," he says, his voice now deeper as he too was growing tired.

Together you both cuddled up together in your bed, falling asleep nearly instantly.

❥ Ted:

▷ Once he realizes you’re asleep he goes full mom mode.

▷ He'll take care to delicately adjust you, making sure you’re comfortable and preventing you from waking up sore.

▷ Looks around for a blanket. If he can’t find one he’ll use the jacket/button up off his own back to keep you warm.

▷ I can see him being the type to still mingling around at the party as you sleep on the couch but he’s never more than a few feet away from you, constantly looking over and checking in

▷ If he's not up and mingling with other partygoers, he's right by your side, talking casually to those closest to him, running his hands through your hair, and tracing your face as you lay on his legs.

▷ As the night winds down and people start to leave, he'll softly wake you, ensuring you're okay and offering a refreshing glass of water.

"Y/n, come on, it's time to go," Ted softly spoke, gently rubbing your shoulder.

"Hmm?" you grumbled, slowly sitting up from where you lay on the couch.

"It's getting late, hun. We should probably get going," he explained, offering you his extended hand.

Slowly, you grabbed his hand and rose to your feet, resting your body against his.

He let out a soft laugh before saying, "Would my tired baby like a piggyback ride?”

You nodded, rubbing your eyes. Swiftly, he bent down, allowing you to climb up onto him before securing your legs with his arms. Sleepily, you laid your head against his shoulder, the subtle movement of his walking occasionally swaying your tired head.

▷ Once to the car he softly places you in the passenger seat, buckling your seatbelt before placing a soft kiss on your forehead.



[babygat0r]

gifted.

happy womb escape to my favorite discomfort streamer <3

reader asks her best friend, schlatt, what he wants for a birthday gift. no use of y/n. nsfw under the cut.

we’d been friends for so, so long now — and we were so, so close, too.

the last few years, i’d asked him what he’d wanted for his birthday. he’d always told me that he just appreciates that i’m thinking about him, but that he really didn’t want anything. he was already grateful for my presence. even during streams or recordings, i’d referenced this many times. he knows i worry about gifts and if they’ll be absolutely perfect for a friend and/or family member.

but this year, i couldn’t resist…he’d bought me cute little knick-knacks for my birthdays, why can’t i return the favor?

────୨ৎ────

so when i arrived at his place, i went and knocked at the door with a pink party hat on and a box full of homemade cupcakes in my hands.

and much like some cheap sitcom, he swung the door open and dragged me in dramatically, pulling me into a tight, warm hug. i have to put the box behind him as i wrap my arms around his waist. that’s when the giggles start!

“i can’t breathe, jay,”

he lets me go with a wide grin on his face, but keeps his hand on my shoulder.

“i told ya, i didn’t want anything…”

“please, it’s only fair!”

────୨ৎ────

after a few cupcakes, conversations, and jokes, i decided to ask him for a final time just for this birthday.

“please jay, are you sure you don’t want anything?”

he looks up, drawing his attention towards me again instead of the polka-dotted cupcake wrapper he was folding smaller and smaller.

“head,”

he joked. i think. so i snicker.

we were so far into our friendship, but sometimes, it’s impossible to tell when he’s serious or not.

but before i can even speak again, he starts before me.

“i’m being honest, toots,”

suddenly, the laughter that once filled the room was gone and all that i did was tilt my head.

“what?”

he paused for a moment, too, it seemed.

“i said, i’m bein’ honest.”

he said firmly.

i would be lying if i said that i hadn’t been pushing aside my feelings for him.

“you — you’re sure?”

he nods.

okay then, birthday boy, if that’s what you want.

i pushed the coffee table further away as i got down on both my knees before him. he’d always sat with his legs spread wide, no shame, and it was so attractive. because of this, the only thing i had to do now was to palm him through his sweatpants.

he let out a sigh of relief, head tilting back to lean onto the couch’s pillows. i wet my lower lip, leaning forward slightly as i pulled the waistband down to allow his cock to spring out. he shudders at the suddenness, and i can’t stop looking at its size. i spat into my palm, then began to stroke my hand up and down, and he groaned. he can’t take his eyes off of me, and i know it. i slap it across my face and he loves it.

“look so fuckin’ gorgeous f’me right now.”

i lick a stripe up the base. i start to bob my head slowly up and down his tip, and my jaw goes slack to fit its width in my mouth. his eyes roll back. all that could be heard now were the filthy noises of the plunging in spit and gagging, and i feel him grasp a fistful of my hair in his large left hand. this meant i didn’t have to do the work anymore, and he could just use me any way he wanted.

we did this for a while. my lips were coated in spit and the gross sounds of squelching echoed off of the simple decoration and white walls.

“god toots, jus’ let me cum in your mouth, yeah?”

my nose presses against his abdomen every time i rock back and forth, and i try my best to nod ‘yes’ as tears fill my eyes. this only keeps him going.

“f-fuck, doll,”

his pace became uneven, he grunted and he held onto my head with more force. i could tell he was getting closer.

“‘m cumming — o-oh, ff-“ he cut himself off with a loud final moan. his grip on me loosened and my throat felt sticky and warm. i could taste him, and i swallow. he tries to catch his breath. i wipe the messy mascara off of my cheeks.

“thank you.” he mutters.

“happy birthday,” we smile.

[squinch-depraved]

schlatt waking you up and using you however he wants (ib an irl experience kinda?? also first fic i've shared let's gooo sorry it's so short and possibly bad i wanted to get my first real post out on his birthday 😔) (shaking crying scared throwing up pls be nice to me)

you weren't sure when exactly you woke up. maybe it was when the door first creaked open and shut, quickly and quietly. maybe somewhere in the next few stagnant silent seconds in which he seemed to contemplate what he was doing, his broad frame pausing in front of the exit just long enough to think, fuck it, before his footsteps led him to the side of your bed. maybe it was when you felt his cock on your face and heard, "smile, toots," just to open your eyes to a bright flash. he was sitting on you now, pinning you down and smacking his throbbing shaft all over your face. a small whimper forces its way past your lips and he laughs.

"j, 'm so tired," you whine.

"you're the one who said i could use you whenever." he grips your chin in one hand when you try to turn away.

"didn't say you could take pictures," you retort, grabbing a pillow and hiding under it.

"needed something for when we're apart. now stop fuckin' talking, or i'm gonna ruin you even worse than i already plan to." the pillow is thrown off the bed before he's even done speaking. "and don't hide this pretty little face when i'm lookin' at it." he pauses for a moment, and then spits on your face. it's humiliating. it's pathetic. but it makes you so, so wet. and he can tell.

he throws your blanket somewhere, and you sigh because you know once he's done with you you'll have to get out of bed to go get it again. unimportant and worth it compared to what's about to happen. a grin lights up his face when he notices you aren't wearing anything but one of his sweaters.

"fuck, doll," he breathes. "were you expecting this or somethin'?" dipping his finger into your slick and bringing it to his mouth, he groans. "never mind, i don't fucking care, just- ugh, just keep lookin' pretty while i use you like the stupid toy you are."

you squeal as he slides himself between your legs and wastes no time slamming himself into you.

"god, toots, slid in so easily, huh? you that wet for me?"

he snickers when you can't say anything back, too sleepy and delirious from his dick to manage a reply. one hand comes up to wrap around your throat while the other holds himself steady as he pounds into you at a relentless pace. what was, before this, a quiet bedroom, is now a dark, echoey chamber of moans and grunts, skin on skin sounds bouncing off the wooden furniture and slate grey walls. pleasure dances through your limbs, settling as an ever-building burning deep in your core. you try to speak with his hand still around your neck.

"j, 'm gonna-"

"i don't care, y/n, either come on my cock or don't but shut up," he pants.

and so you do. you come undone, digging your nails into his back through his sweater. a few moments later, he speeds up a bit and grunts, burying his face into your neck and spilling a rather large load into you. you both stay there for a few minutes, content and unsure of what to say. finally, he looks up at you and smiles slightly.

"sorry. i, uh. i just needed. that," he mumbles. you pet his hair and kiss his forehead.

"get the fuck off me so i can clean up and sleep."

[marsandwich]

little short smut fic!

warnings: Blow Job, cumming in mouth, use of “Toots” and “Doll” “sweet heart” very sweet schlatt,recording.

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

Schlatt groans into his fist as he covers his mouth to secure his noises.

the sound of gagging and slurping heard in the streaming room as schlatt holds up his phone recording you going down on him.

“Fuck toots almost there..” he says in a whisper to not mess up the video and you look up at him with big eyes. He could’ve sworn he could cum right then and there just by looking at you.

You giggle on his cock, the vibrations hitting him and he jolts forward accidentally making you gag.

“Sorry doll-! fuck! so close come on!” he gasp for air and grabs your head and shoves you down more. Your face gets red and tears stream down. Schlatt couldn’t handle it anymore and with a high pitched moan he came in your mouth making you pull off and swallow all of it.

“I’m sorry sweetheart.. you did really good though” He ends the recording and throws his phone to the side and grabs you so you get on his lap and holds you there.

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

That’s all!!!!

[exactlymaximumgarden]

jschlatt masterlist ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🍒 ⋅ ˚✮

smut

his voice lunch club!schlatt - staying quiet, hcs, soft dom hotel room park your car on my face in the mirror

fluff / sfw

streaming with him alone on the balcony slow dancing brother's best friend dad!schlatt - hcs, barbies with his daughter broadway!s/o - hcs, running lines with him his playlist for you edits of you buff!s/o interrupt can't buy me love sleepy afternoons

angst

cry baby you're not the only one i know drown

other

what i did for love - chapter 1, chapter 2

[doubledizzy1258]

this may be the most stressful day of my entire life!! I'm praying for the election because if trump wins, i will literally have rights taken away from me, CHUCKLE SANDWICH IS FUCKING ENDING?? and by the end of the day I may not have a partner anymore! so uhm what the fuck is going on im literally so stressed right now.

[alia-schlatt]

Moustache || Ted Nivison || Pt1

In which a streamer gets embarrassed after fan girling over Ted with a mustache.

a/n: my first time writing a Ted fic because, quite honestly, moustache Ted has been on my mind the entire morning. Also, I'm using both spellings because I can't figure out which one I like better.

As always story under cut!!

ChiliAloe: If you could date any YouTuber, who would it be?

I see the message in chat and read it aloud. My sister and I were doing a get to know us stream as we did every second month for our YouTube channel.

"That's a good question." My sister ponders for a second. "Personally, if I could choose anyone, it would probably be markiplier. But I've met his girlfriend, Amy, and she's the sweetest person on earth, so I'd never actually go for him." My sister says before asking me the question.

I think for a second, "while I'll be honest, I actually went down a bit of a rabbit hole recently after watching a Youtubers almost two hour long video on the Barbie movies." I laugh. "So because of that, I'd have to say Ted Nivison, under one condition"

My sister rolls her eyes, knowing exactly what I'm going to say. "His mustache?"

"His Moustache! That man is good-looking as is, but lord- him with a mustache?" I put my hand over my face, trying to hide my blush. "A man with a Moustache has always been a weakness of mine. And hey, what can I say? He pulls it off extremely well" I shrug.

My sister shakes her head. "Don't let her fool you. Last week, she literally cried over the fact that he keeps shaving and doesn't let the Mustache grow"

"In my defense, I was ovulating," I joke, and she starts laughing at me.

I look at the chat for a second before my entire life flashes before my eyes.

TedNivison: Starting to think I should regrow the mustache.

I start hitting my sister's arm, trying to grab her attention. "Okay, okay, geez, what are you-" her jaw drops, seeing the message before laughing. At the same time, everyone in chat started spamming

HI TED!

I cover my face in my hands, embarrassed. "Ted, I am so sorry, I never would have thought you'd be watching us. I-I don't regret what I said. You are good looking just- gah." I give up rambling just continuing to hide my face. "I'm sorry," I say, looking at myself on the monitor red as a tomato.

"Let's just move on before you make even more of a fool of yourself," my sister says, and I nod "please"

Half an hour later, we end stream, and my sister offers to make hot chocolate for us. I say thanks as she walks out of our home office. I pick up my phone scrolling through my notifications. One catches my eye.

tednivison has followed you back

Followed by another one;

tednivison and 135 others have requested to message you.

My heart skips a beat, and I internally cringe into myself.

I open his message and am greeted by a goofy photo of him staring right at the screen. A small strand of hair fallen across his face.

I heard you have a thing for guys with mustaches?

a/n: Like I said, first time writing a Ted fic, and I'm quite happy with it!

Have a lovely day further everyone💗

[renranram]

Baby making ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

nsfw + fluff

it's literally the title lmfao 😭

let's all be honest here and be straight to the point, schlatt wants to impregnate you ever since he saw you interacting with kids in unpaid intern

ludwig knew by putting both of you two in his show would make great content but he didn't expect he'll actually be an uncle soon

“ baby “ schlatt leans in as you work on editing a new video of yours, “ hm? yeah? “ you look up at him as you lower down your headphones

“ can't you edit later? wanna kiss you “ he states, whiney as he starts pecking your neck, you gasping, feeling his teeth sink in, “ jay… i dont think that's kissing “ you pat his back, hoping to crack a joke

“ y/n… be honest with me okay? “ he pause, pulling away as he faces you, cupping your cheeks as he continues, “ what do you think about children? “ he asks out

as you burst out chuckling, finding him adorable by saying that in a straight face, oblivious of his intentions

“ what? don't laugh im being serious “ he couldn't help but chuckle as he fixes your hair, “ no… it's just… i thought it was gonna be a serious question then you asked me about babies “ you smile

“ it is serious “ he defends himself, smiling at you as you take a deep breath, calming down as you nod, “ uhm… well… i like children..? “

schlatt looks at you weirdly, teasing you, “ ay! i dont mean it that way! “ you playfully hit your fiancé

“ i meant… i wanna take care of children, im happy to take care of children “ you explain thoroughly, as schlatt continues to tease you, as he cocks up one of his eyebrow

“ oh shut up schlatt, you know what i mean “ you chuckle as schlatt sighs, pecking your cheek, “ … okay okay i get it… but you know.. uh.. what about our own children? “

“ our children? “ you repeat, blinking in surprise, “ h-huh…? “ you ask as schlatt caresses your hair

“ toots… i… wanna have children with you “ schlatt confesses, “ our marriage is in 3 weeks… “

“ come on… please… ever since lud’s show… i wanna just… fucking bend you over and fill you up with babies toots.. “ he leans his face on your neck, as your body shivered, feeling his hot breath on your neck

“ jay..! “ you exclaim, surprised, “ what? if you've only seen yourself taking care of those kids, you dont realize how much im excited to wife you up and make you carry my children so badly “ he caresses you hair

“ y/n… babe… please “ he starts pecking your neck, “ toots… please… let me fill you up, let me see you carry our children “

“ … jay “ that's the word that you can mutter out, “ can we do it? “ he gently asks as you take a deep breather, before slowly nodding, “ … okay “

“ fuck… im gonna make love to you all night holy shit “ he chuckles in success as he easily carries you up from your desk as you squeal, surprised

the two of you lock lips, kissing eachother as schlatt holds your back for support before gently setting you down on your guy's bed, hungrily devouring your lips but being so gentle as he slips his hand in your shirt

fondling with your breast, that's why he preferred whenever you don't wear any bras, for easy access if yk what i mean

he gently removes your shirt, liking how your nipples perk up, as he breaks the kiss a string of saliva connects your lips, as he kisses your breast, his lips sucking on your nipples as he looks up at you with those endearing eyes of his

“ angh… jay “ you moan out as he trace kisses all over your body until it reaches your hips, his hand gently guiding you as he removes your pants and panties

“ does it feel good? “ he asks, as he threw your last piece of clothing on your bedroom's floor, as you nod in response, “ i want you to feel so good okay? “ schlatt smiles

as he gently divides your legs, making you spread out for him, “ fuck… how do you get this wet so easily? “ schlatt states before gently entering a finger in, causing you to gasp

“ because… you make me so wet “ you chuckle softly as schlatt chuckes too, slowly thrusting his finger in and out as he leans in to peck your clit

he savors your pussy as he digs himself in, tasting you as he moans out while you arch your back in pleasure, holding onto his hair as you moan his name out, “ jay… fuck “

he swirls his tongue in, fucking your hole with his tongue, he can feel your flaps flutter as he continues on

he licks your clit, swirling his tongue around it even sucking it, “ feels so good toots? feels so good hm? “ he repeats, mumbling as he eats you out

“ yes… yes… ah… schlatt “ you gently pulls on his hair as he continues to thrust his finger in while tongue fucking you, adding another finger causing you to gasp again as you rolls your eyes back

you wrap your legs around his head, locking him in as he notices your breath fastening, you're close, he continues to lick you out as your moans are getting louder and louder every second

“ b-babe… ugh… im cumming “ you breathe out but immediately regretted it as schlatt pulls away, as you whine, “ what the fuck “ you groan out, now pouting

“ dont look at me like that “ schlatt chuckles, “ im not letting my wife get an orgasm because i ate her out “ he replies as he unties his jogs, lowering it revealing his hard dick, not wearing any underwear since it's only you two home

“ remember, our focus here is getting you pregnant with our healthy babies, not tongue fucking you until you're pleasured “ he smiles, teasing you as he pats your cheek, pecking you

he slowly pushes his tip in, teasing you as he rubs it on your clit, “ then get me pregnant already… you're just teasing me at this point “ you pout as he slaps the side of your hips

“ so impatient, are you this eager to be a mother already? “ schlatt pushes his whole size in, gasping, feeling his dick fill you up, you can feel it throbbing inside you

“ fuck! “ you gasp out, as schlatt holds your hips, slamming his dick inside of you, as you gasp again, moaning, enjoying how you easily bounce off just from a thrust

“ you look more prettier like this, “ he teases you, leaning in as he folds your body in half just to able to lock lips with you again, “ i should fuck you everyday so we can be sure you get pregnant “ he added

his rolls his hips, his hands trailing all over your body, touching every part of you, his hands trace your curves, admiring your shape and body

kissing your forehead, cheek, neck, everywhere, this man makes you feel loved everytime, “ you're gonna look so pretty with my kids, yeah? “ schlatt fucks you up

“ you're gonna be my little pretty wife okay, gonna see you carry our kids, gonna make you be a pretty little housewife “

after saying those you can feel his pace fasten, god, it really does feel different without the rubber, you thought, as your room fills with moans, skin slapping, thrusts, groans and squelches

“ ah ngh jay- jay- please… “ you moan out, pulling on his hair as you can feel him throb, his thrusts getting aggressive every second as your body limps in pleasure

“ im cumming.. im cumming.. baby, toots.. ugh.. im gonna fill you up, im gonna fill you up with my babies, you're gonna… fuck… look so pretty pregnant, you're gonna be the most prettiest.. fucking housewife ever “ schlatt starts to peck your face before catching your lips

the two of you kiss, your tongues tangled with eachother as he finally cums inside of you, while you squirt your juices, unison with his orgasm, schlatt pulls out, chuckling in amusement as he sees his semen leaks out of you

“ fuck… you're gonna be a the mother of our children soon “ he smiles, pushing his finger in to keep his semen from leaking

-

a full year had passed, your child was finally brought on the world, you sigh out as you publish a new video, as you look behind, seeing schlatt was holding your daughter, carrying her as he smiles at you

“ is she asleep? “ you stand up, approaching them, “ surprisingly yeah, she's been behaving for me “ schlatt gently caresses your daughter face

admiring as the 3 month old scrunches her face in her sleep, “ she's a big mama’s girl huh? “ you ask, as schlatt nods, “ i think she loves you more than me “

“ but in her defense, if you're my mom id prefer you “ schlatt jokes as you chuckle, leaning your head onto his shoulder

[pequins]

WHICH ONE OF YOU FREAKS TOLD SCHLATT HE LOOKED HOT IN THE FIGHT ME VIDEO …