#chrissy/robin

[419jhat]

Princess AU for my favorite Stranger Things femslash ship

[roomwithanopenfire]

magnetic magical everything

exhange fic for @stevesjockstrap!!!!

Word Count: 5,217

Rating: Mature

Ship: Robin/Chrissy

Tags: College AU, Friends to Lovers, Roommates to lovers, Parties, First Kiss, Getting Together

Summary: Robin and Chrissy are roommates and best friends. While Robin might want more, she knows that's never going to happen. Right?

Read on AO3 written for the Sapphic Stranger Things Holiday Exchange hosted by @sapphicstevents

[achilleanenjolras]

Stranger Things Kinktober Day 29: Feather

Hey, remember when I literally completely forgot to promote my kinktober story even though I've been working on it for 29 days? Me too.

Today's pairing: Robin/Chrissy

Prompt: Feather

[angelynmoon]

Steddie au corpse bride(guess who rewatched this movie)

Eddie, new money, was set to wed Chrissy Cunningham to bring her family back to high standing.

Steve, when he was a young boy, fell in love with a boy who promised him that he'd take him away from his family and expectations and give him a life of adventure, but that they'd need a way to fund it. (Billy)

Billy kills Steve and buries him in an unmarked grave, where many years later Eddie is practicing his vows and ends up married to dead Steve.

As Eddie gets to know his corpse husband he learns a few things about himself, some of it confusing, is he a necrophiliac if he falls in love with his dead husband?

Anyway he goes back to talk to Chrissy and to explain because they were secret friends, the only reason they are alright with marrying one another is because Eddie is gay and Chrissy is a lesbian, they knew their marriage would be platonic.

Steve, obviously get a little jealous and takes Eddie back to deadland before Chrissy can ask if they can really be married because ''till death doth part us' and Steve is already dead.

So Chrissy goes to the priest(jason) of the villiage to ask and gets double damned because gay and dead so Chrissy's parents think it's best to get her married immediatly to the nearest 'noble' who coincidently is Billy.

Things progress to Eddie and Steve getting married in the land of the living but Steve sees Chrissy and tries to be a good person and let Eddie go to be with Chrissy who he thinks Eddie loves.

Billy reveals Chrissy is his wife and Steve reveals that Billy killed him and Eddie has a sword fight with him, and Steve steps infront of Eddie, and Billy has his little villian speech, drinks the poison and the deadcrew takes him to deadland for the revenge for Steve.

Steve turns to Eddie to tell Eddie he can be with Chrissy, only to discover that the sword went right through Steve and through Eddie too.

So Eddie dies and he and Steve live a happy dead life together.

And Steve tells Chrissy where he buried his family jewels and money, because as in love with Billy as he was, he wasn't stupid enough to bring his money with him before the got as married as they could.

So Chrissy goes on the adventures and gets away from her family, with Wayne going with as a chaperone/guardian, along the way they meet a girl named Robin who becomes her lady in waiting but is actually her lover, and Chrissy's excuse for never marrying is that the love of her life died protecting her from a murderer, and only she, Wayne and eventually Robin know that Eddie is happy living his best undead life with the man he fell in love with, the one he died to be with.

[chronicpainstevetruther]

AU where Chrissy is constantly visiting family video and slowly makes friends with Stobin. She breaks up with Jason over winter break and goes to tell them, only Robin is off work for a family event. She seems super nervous and Steve thinks she might be into him and decides to let her down easy. He would never date his best friend's crush and he thinks of Chrissy as a friend anyways. But Chrissy is like, "No I'm not into you, Steve.... I do like someone though." And he clues in immediately to her crush on Robin and she comes out as bisexual to him. Cue shenanigans as Steve tries to get them together without outing either of them and Chrissy tries to make new friends with the band and theatre nerds at school after being ostracized by the jocks.

[zerokrox-blog]

[Puts head on the other’s shoulder]

“What are you doing up? Come to bed.”

“I just feel calmer. When I’m with you.”

You choose the ships!

I decided to put two of the prompts together with one ship and the third one with a different ship.

Prompt 1 +2

“What are you doing up?  Come to bed.” + Puts head on the other’s shoulder Chrissy/Robin

Chrissy was having a good day. There was a thick layer of snow on the ground. She was bundled up in a warm coat and wearing a cozy hand-knitted scarf her girlfriend Robin had made for her on their anniversary. She smiled as she buried her face deeper into its soft fluffy warmth. She hummed as she walked through the snow. She was heading home after a long shift at the restaurant she worked at while she was in school. Chrissy was carrying home takeout as Robin hadn’t been feeling so good this morning, she had woken up earlier in the day with an intense stomach ache and headache. So Chrissy brought her home some hot veggie-soup with warm freshly baked bread from the local bakery. 

She continued humming as she walked up the narrow road towards the home they shared. She walked up the path and entered their cozy home. She saw Robin on their couch in the other room which made her pause because Robin had told her she was going to sleep on their bed upstairs. 

Robin shifted and let out a small sound as she sat up. Chrissy moved in closer to her after taking off her shoes, coat and sweater. Robin rubbed her eyes and looked at her quietly. There was a look of confusion on her face.   

“I’m home baby.” she kept her voice low, “what are you doing up, darling? I thought you’d be in our bed? Did something wake you up?”

Robin nodded, still sleepy. “I missed you. And I can’t sleep without you next to me.” 

Chrissy turned red, her heart warmed. She settled beside her girlfriend, her Robin and pulled her close.

She sucked in a deep breath and Robin rested her head on Chrissy’s shoulder, eyes slowly falling shut. Chrissy pressed a small kiss to her head, “sleep baby. I brought home soup and bread for when you’re ready. I’ll warm them up for you ok?” 

Robin nodded, eyes falling completely shut. She would rest for now and at some point later she would wake up hungry, ready to eat. But for now she was warm and tired. Chrissy was holding her close so she slept on.

Prompt 3

“I just feel calmer. When I’m with you.” Chrissy/Eddie/Steve

It had been a rough few nights. Eddie was in Chicago with the band. They had some gigs there. Chrissy was in Boston visiting family, and Steve was home, alone. He worked long days so he’d be exhausted enough to crash without overthinking and actually sleep. But he couldn’t. The three of them had conference calls nightly to catch up, But right now Steve wanted to scream. He was overtired but his nightmares mixed with the silence was not a fun combination. 

On Friday night a full week without his partners, Steve was at his wits end. He kept shifting in their big empty bed. The pillows that Chrissy and Eddie used didn’t really smell like their shampoo anymore. And the blankets felt too hot but also not quite hot enough and he was too cold if he took it off, so after tossing and turning for several long hours he gave up. 

He got up, slipped on a shirt from Eddie and a pair of shorts from Chrissy and stumbled into the main room where he flicked on the TV. He went into the kitchen to make himself a hot cocoa. Once that was done he went to the couch and settled down curling up using a soft blue blanket. He slipped it slowly watching the cheesy comedy sketch playing on TV, keeping it on low hoping he’d sleep. 

So he dozed, the Tv actually covered up the sound of the front door opening, but it didn’t cover up the voices coming from the front hall. Immediately he felt his body relax. 

Chrissy and Eddie stepped into the main room, spying Steve blearily looking at them. 

“Hi baby love.” Chrissy kept her tone low. 

“Hi.” he breathed. “you’re home?” 

Eddie nodded and moved closer. “Why are you here honey boy. Is there a problem with our bed?” 

Steve shook his head and mumbled out, “not safe without. But now you’re both home. I already feel sleepier. Are you going to sleep?” 

Both of them nodded. Steve held out his arms and Chrissy laughed warmly. Eddie pulled Steve into his arms. “Sleep love, we have you and we are home, sweetheart.”

Steve nodded and tucked his face into Eddie’s neck but not before both of them heard him say, “I just feel calmer. When I’m with you. Keep me safe. I will keep you safe and both of you are home.”

Eddie and Chrissy caught each other’s eyes. Their boy was precious to them both and the fact he felt safe enough to tell them how he was feeling. Well…it just meant they’d have to keep it going. He deserved the best and they were more than happy to help him feel safer and calmer.

ask me things!

[mispatchedgreens]

portrait of a robin on fire. or sth

(the digital art thing is going well)

[stevesjockstrap]

👀👀 okayokay might be a bit of a challenge bUT chrissy/robin + 1?

Chrissy/Robin + things you said at 1am

By one o’clock in the morning most of their classmates had passed out at the lock-in. Robin didn’t sleep well most nights anyways but she especially couldn’t wind down sleeping in their school’s gymnasium with a bunch of other people.

Heading towards the bathroom, she heard urgent whispers.

“No, Jason. C’mon, we’re supposed to be in the gym.”

Robin rounded the corner in time to see him block Chrissy from walking down the hall and push her against the wall.

“Hey, she said no,” Robin called, thankfully sounding more brave than she felt. The pair stared at her. “Uh, hey, can you show me where the girl’s bathroom down here is?”

Chrissy immediately nodded at her, and thankfully Jason allowed her to sidestep him. “Oh! Yes! It’s hard to find since the sign got knocked off. It’s this way.”

In the bathroom, they both eyed each other, unsure if either of them would mention what Robin had interrupted. She wasn’t sure if she would try to cover for him.

“Having a good night?” She chewed on her thumbnail nervously.

Chrissy shrugged, ducking her head. “My friends bailed. I wouldn’t have come if I knew they weren’t going to be here. He- um, Jason, he’ll usually knock it off sooner if I’m with someone.”

“He seems like a lot,” she said.

Chrissy laughed, making the bathroom seem brighter. “He is so much.”

“You can, uh, I mean, if you want, we can hang out. Keep him at bay for a bit.”

“Really?” Robin had to do a double take to make sure Chrissy was looking at her, speaking to her with that amount of enthusiasm.

“Y-yeah, it’s fine.”

“Thanks. It’s Robin, right? I’m Chrissy,” she beamed at her. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a crap night after all.

[home-and-having-tea]

GOOD NEWS. Buckingham chapter 4 is almost done!

BAD NEWS. Its like 10K on its own.

[strangersatellites]

give me eddie who calls everyone pet names so casually that the reason steve gets tipped off about eddie’s Thing For Him is because he just calls him steve.

i’m talking calling robin sugar, and chrissy princess, and any of the kids big guy or my man.

but eddie is so hyperaware of His Feelings and the fact that he already let one ‘big boy’ slip that he overcorrects and only ever addresses steve by his government name.

steve is jealous at first but the way eddie’s eyes always go a little crazy and he’s constantly clearing his throat before he addresses steve kind of show his hand.

steve’s not too worried after that.

[cheer-nympho]

Imagine Eddie and Chrissy accidentally running into each other while spying on scoops,

Eddie sat on a bench behind a shrubbery looking through but he spots Chrissy doing the same across the court- they stare at each other for what feels like the longest few seconds of all time, shocked and baffled, before Eddie ducks and stealth runs to her bench,

Just sitting next to her and loudly whispering “What are you doing?!”

“What am I doing? What are you doing!”

“Well, I was just..-“ They hear a giggle from scoops and both duck under the plant and look through the gaps again. Immediately they turn back on each other with their fingers raised “You’re spying!” They both whisper at the same time before looking around to check no one heard,

Eddie puts his arm around her to duck her down away from the stores view and from anyone looking over- because their duo is bound to turn heads even without the whole hiding in foliage thing.

“Okay okay, we’re both spying on scoops. Now I’m sure neither of us are here for the overpriced sundaes, so what are you looking at PomPom?”

“PomPom?”

“Codename, keep up.”

“I’ll tell you if you tell me.”

“Well I’ll tell you if you tell me…”

“Well I’ll…Eddie this is silly!”

“Okay fine! So we’re both spying on scoops. Neither of us are here with our friends…we’re being secretive instead of just going in…we’re both 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 why we’re here. Chrissy, U think we’re here for similar reasons, I think there’s a reason we don’t wanna tell each other.”

“But what if- What if it not the same reason? What if you…freak out or get spooked?”

“How about this, if I promise not to be annoyed by what you say- you promise the same back?” She looks around the food court a few times before looking back at him determined and nodding.

“Okay, 3, 2, 1”

Then at the same time…

“I was spying on Robin!” / “I was checking out Steve!”

Followed by

“The hair Harrington?!” / “From band?!”

Chrissy levels him with an unimpressed look, to which Eddie sheepishly removes his arm from hers. “Okay fair, mine is weirder.”

Cut to Eddie having a clever (read: incredibly dumb) plan of going in together so they can talk to Robin and Steve without ‘arousing suspicion’ Chrissy finds herself full of new confidence so doesn’t feel like pointing out that it was more subtle if they just went in alone.

[narelyy]

The "fuck the athletes" bf

The "please do" bf

[undreaming-fanfiction]

What if Steve is a famous model and Eddie is a rockstar, both still pretty down to earth that they move around without bodyguards...

They bump into each other at a corner, and literally bump into each other - Steve somehow lost his contact lenses and he's half-blind without them, his agent Robin is traveling, he'd rather lose both of his eyes than to call his parents, and so he's trying to get to a pharmacy/optometrist/somewhere else just based on memory and touch.

Eddie is walking, not paying much attention and listening to music, when he's knocked back by a very apologetic squinting guy who might as well be very pretty, if he looked straight at Eddie - which is very much not possible, as Steve later explains, Eddie is a very blurry blob to him, although a very kind blob. Also a really nice sounding blob.

When Eddie collects his things and his heart off the streetwalk, he offers to walk Steve to the pharmacy. After asking if it's okay, he offers Steve his arm and leads him carefully to his destination. Steve is still mostly staring at the ground, trying to fight blurry nausea, so Eddie doesn't really know what he looks like, except that his hair is magnificent.

They reach the pharmacy, Steve is so thankful that he wants to invite Eddie for coffee, but before he can do that, Eddie receives an urgent call from his agent and needs to leave.

They both - not without a tinge sadness - think they won't see each other again.

Except the next day there's a wave of tabloid headlines: "CORRODED COFFIN'S EDDIE MUNSON FINALLY SETTLES DOWN?! THE ROCKSTAR SEEN WITH REDKEN'S MODEL STEVE HARRINGTON!" and there are pictures of Steve and Eddie, side by side, and it really looks like a romantic walk rather than what it was.

When Eddie's agent Chrissy calls, half-amused, half-concerned, Eddie stops her with a single sentence: "Can you get me his number?!"

Chrissy snorts in the phone. "Give me an hour."

It takes her 33 minutes in total, and she secures a date with Robin for herself as a bonus.

And as for Eddie? He opens his message with "Hey Steve, how come you never told me it was a date? I would have brought flowers!" and gets an immediate response of "You would have, huh? Then bring some today at seven, the pizzeria next to the pharmacy. I like sunflowers. See you there, Eddie. And this time, I mean really see you."

The "see you" jokes stay with them for the rest of their lives.

[achilleanenjolras]

Looking for weird-sad surreal Buckingham? Look no further! I'm EXTREMELY proud of this one.

[inklessletter]

Of bows and ducks 🐤

Patreon | Bluesky | Instagram

(Ficlet 👇🏻👇🏻 👇🏻)

[W: 1.6k - Rated M: Chrissy's POV, angst, eating disorder, abusive household]

Chrissy Cunningham wears bright eyeshadows because it distracts people’s attention from her crooked teeth.

Chrissy Cunningham wakes up half an hour before to curl her ponytail to create the impression that she has more hair than she actually has.

Chrissy Cunningham wears oversized clothes because it creates the illusion that she’s smaller.

Chrissy Cunningham has been shaving her legs since she was eight years old.

All of Chrissy Cunningham’s underwear is cotton white, and her mother cuts all the decorative little bows off.

Chrissy Cunningham hasn’t slept more than five hours at night in years, because perfection takes time.

Chrissy Cunningham hasn’t finished any meal since she was eleven, because it makes her look exemplary to her parents’ friends when she says she’s full before finishing, even if she's still hungry.

Chrissy Cunningham’s mother taught her all of this.

So, it’s safe to say that every morning, when she wakes up from yet another short sleep, Chrissy Cunningham doesn’t know who Chrissy Cunningham is. She feels like her own skin isn’t hers, it’s just some character that her mother has carefully created, and it’s a role she can’t break free from. 

Chrissy Cunningham doesn’t exist, not really.

Her friends don’t talk about this. They occasionally whine about the food or their body size, but they always take a few minutes to look at themselves in the mirror of the school restroom to style out their hair, or to put some make up on that they have to hide from their parents. 

Chrissy hates mirrors, because she always has the supernatural feeling that her reflection is someone else’s, but it was starting to get suspicious that she didn’t even put lip gloss, so she bought one last summer at Starcourt mall. 

She liked the mall. It was one of the few places she was allowed to go with her friends without her mother’s scrutinizing eye on her at all times. She used to side eye that one lingerie shop, wondering if she would ever wear one of the lacey black panties.

Well, not actually those, but something that is not white. Hell, if she was honest to herself, she would settle for just keeping the little bows. She’d settle for her mother not manipulating her intimate clothes.

She thought of stealing a pair of hot pink panties, but she’s too much of a coward. 

There’s something Chrissy’s friend used to do every time after shopping, though, and it would later keep her awake at night out of pure guilt. They would go to the ice cream parlor. She couldn’t buy an ice cream, actually, because her mother always counted the money and made her give it all back, then asked for the receipts, and she couldn’t just see one of an ice cream because that’d mean that she won’t have dinner for the following week (unfinished meals every night are better than no meal at all).

But she would go there, anyway, and let her friends engage with the Harrington boy so they could get a discount from him, and she’d glance more than once at the display of several flavors behind the glass, fantasizing how many scoops she’d have, or which ones she would choose, and then, with no fail, the other cashier, Robin Buckley, from school band, would come to ask which one she wants to try. It makes Chrissy feel naughty, she always picks a different one, but buys nothing. 

That happens several times. She tries not to think how sad it is that this little thing is actually thrilling. Something so small that makes her feel like she still exists.

Robin’s in uniform but she manages to own it. Her shoes are scribbled all over, she wears a lot of trinkets, little chains, silver (her mother doesn’t let her wear silver, just gold), her hair is cut unevenly, and looks like she tried to make highlights at home with cleaning bleach, and her smudge eyeshadow seems to be done with her finger.

Chrissy likes that so very much. Robin shows through the uniform. She slips through the cracks, like yelling at the world that Robin exists, that Robin is.

It’s not nice to compare, but she looks at her group of friends and thinks that they all… they all kind of look the same. And they worry about the same silly stuff that seems ordinary but is out of Chrissy’s reach, like parents not going for a weekend so they can sneak their boyfriends in.

They all share that they won't see Chrissy, either. Not really.

Not ever.

Because they are all the same person.

That’s an unkind thought.

Maybe Chrissy is unkind.

Then the Starcourt mall burns down and it feels like a divine intervention for how secretly petty she is when she’s there.

It happens in July, and since Chrissy’s mother won’t let her go to any parties, she starts training near the school for when the cheerleading season begins again, and that’s when she meets Jason Carver. 

He’s on the basketball court and she’s running laps. They steal glances and that’s exciting, because the boy is beautiful. His smile looks like  the prologue of a tragedy and she falls in love with that feeling. They exchange more than glances and smiles and she wants things she never wanted before. It all fades into the blur of a far away memory right when school begins and they trade hot kisses and love bites for holding hands in the hallway. 

She feels nothing for him when Chrissy realizes Jason loves the curated version that her mother has made out of her, not actually her. He loves that she’s girly, and perfectionist with her looks, that she’s fit and petite, that unnatural lovely hair swirl, that she wears cute colors on her eyelids and that she always leaves fries for him whenever they go to a diner. 

Nothing.

And what’s about her to love, anyway? Who is Chrissy Cunningham? She’s just—

She is just gone.

Maybe she was never there to begin with, inside this tight suit of skin and heavy bones she wears everywhere.

She keeps avoiding the stranger in the mirror when she realizes she only can see what her mother sees wrong in her, or she can only hear the comments of Jason about her bony hips that one time they were at the backseat of his car. Chrissy knows how to do her makeup without using the cursed mirror, she knows how to style her hair without it, and it’s weird, that’s why she always helps the coach to store all the stuff they used, coming into the dressing room after her team, and fakes to take more time in the shower after practice, to be the last one to leave. To dress herself with the profaned underwear without looking at it, to reconstruct the image she hates so much and not having to put a smile upon her face while she fades away one day more.

That time she’s not alone when she comes in, all sweaty in her uniform.

There’s the ice cream girl, Robin. They had band practice and she was the only one who actually took it seriously about practicing with the stiff jacket of the uniform for an upcoming rally. She heard the rehearsal from the gym.

Robin hasn’t seen her yet, and Chrissy just can’t move. Robin is listening to something that she’s humming to in her walkman, that she stops with a loud click and puts away, unbuttoning her shirt.

Something is happening inside Chrissy when she sees Robin’s ducky bra.

A ducky bra.

Sky blue background and a god damned yellow ducky pattern.

Chrissy has never in her life seen something like that. That looks… Okay, that doesn’t even look the right size. Maybe it’s from past years and she still uses it. It looks comfortable, though, even if a little old.

It has the little, bright orange bow between her breasts.

She gasps audibly, and Robin spots her.

They lock gazes and Robin actually looks like a deer caught in headlights. Pink cheeks, big, blue eyes focused on her.

She’s so gorgeous without even trying. She always has been.

Chrissy is in a strange chokehold. It has to be nice to be someone, she thinks to herself, and not being afraid to exist.

They talk, but Chrissy’s not even paying attention to what she is saying. She’s only looking at Robin, and Chrissy must have said something funny because Robin laughs. She can’t look away, notice Robin’s cheeks growing darker, her hand accommodating her hair behind her own ears, the low conversation taking place in an empty space.

She does remember asking Robin if she could kiss her, though.

She does remember standing there in silence before their mouths meet halfway, experimental and new, soft and wet.

Chrissy hears herself whine in Robin’s lips, and dares to ask for more. Begs Robin to touch her and she’s feeling Robin’s cold fingers around her waist, lips locking, mouth opening, tongue curling around hers.

Robin is chatty, but Chrissy doesn’t mind. She spares a few words here and there in between kisses, and then Robin whispers to her ear, over, and over again, “I saw you. At the mall, I saw you. Every time.”

Chrissy gasps and kisses her again, grabs her hair, puts her body against her, skin touching skin, they fall to the floor and keep kissing until her lips are sore and someone opens the door of the locker room and they both hid from that uninvited person to keep kissing in silence, which was rather hard, but ultimately thrilling and funny. 

It’s hours later, under the safe covers of her bed when she realizes that for a little while she actually felt her skin as her own. And that’s new, that’s fresh. 

Thrilling. Something so small that makes her feel like she actually exists.

Maybe Chrissy wasn’t gone after all.

Maybe Chrissy Cunningham actually exists.

[scoops-aboy86]

Here’s an out of the ordinary career option for Steve: teppanyaki chef. You know, the guys at Japanese hibachi restaurants that do the whole show of cooking your food right there at a big grill on the table and tossing food into people’s mouths and flipping their cooking implements like it’s no big. 

Inspired largely by the fact that I had teppanyaki earlier this week and the chef, in addition to flipping eggs into his hat and then onto his spatula to break them, was making shrimp fried rice and spelled “I” with the shrimp, “❤️” with the rice, and “U” either the veg and egg. 

Just picture Steve, in the goofy tall hat that does even fewer favors for his hair than the Scoops hat, doing that with the same goofy grin on his face as during the lightsaber handshake bit.

Maybe rockstar Eddie comes in with the band and an entourage one night. He notices Steve making silly faces back and forth with Robin (one of the bartenders or a seating host or something) across the room, and thinks it’s cute. He joins in making silly faces at Steve, who is *delighted* and 100% starts doing it back because usually the customers are too wrapped up in their own lives to notice. 

Robin is a little annoyed that her work buddy has been co-opted for the night, but once she gets a better look at Eddie she just rolls her eyes and laughs under her breath because he is definitely Steve’s type. Then her eyes move a fraction to the left and she notices Corroded Coffin’s manager, Chrissy Cunningham, and immediately goes 😍 for the rest of their stay.

Steve is supposed to spread his attention equally around the table, and he sort of does, but Eddie definitely gets more food tossed in his mouth than anyone else. Maybe he brought a date (possibly a groupie, possibly just someone willing to put out for a celebrity, he’d just sort of shrugged like “okay, sure” when they attached themself to him) for the evening that he’s totally ignoring, because as far as he’s concerned no one else is as interesting as the pretty chef. The date gets visibly more grumpy, which the rest of the band definitely notices, but they all just sort of roll their eyes and sigh because Steve is definitely Eddie’s type, sorry friend, don’t know what to tell ya. Eventually the date gets up saying they’re going to the bathroom, but they take their coat. It takes Eddie, like, half an hour to notice. 

And Steve keeps doing those little flippy things, like with his ice cream scoop and the nail bat, all. The. Time. It’s not even a gimicky restaurant thing, he’s just Like That. He says he can do it with anything and Gareth immediately produces drumsticks (I have never met a drummer who did not have drumsticks on them at all times, often even when another pair has been confiscated), and Steve takes about three seconds to figure out how to twirl them like a pro. Eddie is already removing a ring to propose. Chrissy makes some sort of comment about being in the color guard for marching band (in addition to cheerleading) and speculating whether Steve could spin a saber or rifle and he’s so confident he could do it that Eddie is like, “When is your next break, that could be our honeymoon baby” because he is going to eat this man alive. 

Suffice it to say, Steve ends the night with his dick sucked and within a week he’s gotten Chrissy’s number for Robin, who he’s been talking up incessantly. A month later, he puts Gareth in touch with Will about some sort of artistic commission that Gareth wants, which eventually leads to Will finally ending his pining over Mike streak. 

Steve has to formally apologize to Jeff and Doug for not having any more single friends to introduce them to, but he promises to keep an eye out. In the meantime, have they ever tried Purple Palm Tree Delight? Because he knows a guy…