#chill out and enjoy some bread with my boy Tad

[noodles-and-tea]

What are people even saying fiddleford did?? 😭 like what did he ever do wrong I can’t think of a single thing. maybe it’s bc I didn’t read the book yet

I think what is primarily being discussed in his case is a) he left his wife and b) he started a cult to erase people’s memories, generally nonconsentually.

Now we don’t actually know all that much about fiddlefords relationship with his wife, there are things that suggest he maybe wasn’t prioritising his family when he was with Ford (I.e. the Christmas presents) but I think it’s unfair to write off someone’s headcanon or theory as “wrong” when there’s no definite answer.

The cult is probably definitely a bad.

BUT! What’s so revolutionary about Gravity Falls is that it has well written characters that are complex and with flaws. I think just about every main character does something bad or selfish at one point or another but it’s also always perfectly justifiable to the character too. There is always personal reason for their actions so nothing is technically black and white “bad”.

I’m not pointing fingers but I reckon some people who maybe aren’t so familiar with fandom spaces or consuming media in a more critical way seem to have a sort of mindset which means that in order for you to like a character they have to be entirely good (or bad - but if they’re bad you have to admit they’re bad and that’s why you like them). And of course people could also take the personal justification and turn it into actual justification.

A lot of the conflict in the show is morally ambiguous and the characters motives are generally easy to understand and even empathise with. Most people that genuinely enjoy the characters - or at least, speaking for myself - don’t excuse their flaws but enjoy the complexities of them!

All that to say, Fiddleford is literally me you guys <3

[worminstuff]

i introduce: tbott shorts! first edition,

same old, same old.

sleepy bois x reader au or as some of you may know, tbott.

set a tad into the future, a short blurb of what’s to come for this series. :) not all of these will be in the future. some may be past memories or even close around when tbott itself was set. i will clarify in all of the future parts of the series aswell:)

no warnings:)

word count: 900

enjoy!! and drink water.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

“Oi! None of that! You’re supposed to be eating, not plotting. Gremlins.” Phil pointed a spatula to the two boys sitting at the dining table behind him.

Tubbo and Tommy were now about the age of 11 and 10, and they’re the same as ever. Just more dangerous as they’ve got much more knowledge behind their backs.

Much like y/n, Tubbo quickly became a regular around the sleepy house as the pair got older. Tubbo was to Tommy as y/n is to Techno, platonically. Techno and y/n grew out of the treehouse a tad, so the gremlins inherited it quickly.

The treehouse had turned from a lovely comfy book nook area, full of lovely memories, to a sky lair full of chaotic plans.

“When are they not plotting, though?” y/n piped up from beside the two of them. Tommy stuck his tongue out at her and Tubbo followed suit.

Techno passed by Tommy’s chair to get to y/ns but as he passed Tommy he hit him softly on the cheek, “How are the braces feeling, metal mouth?”

“Don’t call me that you cunt!” Tommy blurted, clutching his cheek.

“Tommy!” Phil and y/n both yelled at the same time as Techno stood staring at him, all of them shell shocked.

Tommy’s eyes widened. He looked to the floor, “sorry…”

Phil sighed but nodded.

Techno chuckled softly and continued to y/ns chair standing behind it. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“Do you two need anything for the house? Bread, eggs, milk? Anything?” Phil asked.

“Dryer sheets?” Techno said after a short pause.

Phil looked at him with a quirked brow before nodded. “Take what you need.”

Techno nodded and headed off down the hall to the laundry room.

“Y/n?” Tommy turned to his nonblood sister.

“Hm?”

“Can we come to see bonk today? We’ve got nothing to do and it’s all rainy out.”

“Tommy that’s an awesome plan!” Phil answered just as y/n was about to protest. She shot him a glance. “I’ve got to help Sam with something so I won’t be home and I don’t feel like leaving them alone on a rainy day. Take them back with you when you and techno head back why don’t you?” Phil gave a sweet smile and she caved.

“Right, what else should we do other than see bonk?” she asked both Tommy and tubbo.

They shared a glance and then leaned over whispering to each other. y/ns eyes narrowed, she already didn’t like how this was panning out.

“What are you two doing?” techno asked as he reentered finally, “what are they doing?” he asked his girlfriend.

“Plotting our demise.” she huffed.

Techno stared blankly at his little brother before giving him a soft smack on the head “quit it.”

“Oh sure, that’ll do it.” y/n said sarcastically.

“Dad! The married couple is a fight-” before Tommy could finish his sentence the back of his head met techno hand again, “oi! Quit it!” Tommy mocked.

Phil slipped on his shoes and then placed a kiss on y/ns head, and patted all the boy’s heads. “I’m leaving,” he said with a soft laugh as he quickly grabbed his coat.

“Heh?!” Techno quickly looked to y/n in panic.

“Oh yeah, we’re stuck with the rug rats today.” she smiled.

Techno paused, then sighed. He had planned on getting to relax and chill out with y/n for the day. He was excited about it too.

Tubbo and Tommy cheered at his disappointment.

Both boys scoffed down their pancakes as Techno cleaned up the kitchen for his dad, and once everyone was done they gathered their things to head to techno and y/ns house.

“Aye! No lighters in my house please and thank you.” y/n pointed at Tommy as she passed his doorway. Tommy had a lighter in his hand he was about to place in his backpack. Tommy slowly set it back on his desk.

The morning was about as tame as it could’ve been with Tommy and Tubbo, bonk got many cuddles and even played around with them for a tad.

The three of them managed to tire themselves out and actually passed out on y/n and Techno’s bed. It reminded y/n of a fond memory of hers.

After Techno saw the two boys out like a light, he quickly grabbed y/n so they could sit together and chill for as long as they would be able to. He hadn’t seen her much that day, and he wasn’t fond of it.

Techno managed to wrangle her away from whatever cleaning she was trying to do and dragged her to the living room. No to the couch, but to the floor in front of it.

“Sit.” he pointed to the rug.

y/n made a face at him. He huffed a laugh.

“As you would in the treehouse,” he said.

y/n quickly realized what he meant and happily sat on the rug cris cross. Techno followed suit but laid sort of next to her with his head in her lap. y/n pulled the small hair tie that was holding the top half of his hair up so she could run her hand through his hair.

Many things have changed over the years, but some things just won’t ever change for the sleepy bunch.

[masjestickingdom]

Friends

Pairing: NCT x reader

Genre: one shot, fluff

Summary: You’ve been a close friend of NCT for a long time. They love you and they can get very protective of you, so when you start seeing a guy, they start bombarding him with questions.

Note: Just a light scenario to refer back to when I post a serious(ly long) one shot with some angst--not a lot of angst, but it’s there and more prevalent than all of my posts combined so far, so get ready! In the meantime, enjoy this light fluff!  _______________________________________________________________________

  It was one minute and twenty-seven seconds since you sat down in the living room with your boyfriend, who was right by your side, and all you wanted to do was dig a hole and stay in there.

  There they were, gathered around you two, with their hands under their chins, staring blatantly at your boyfriend. You mentally deadpanned. Just what on Earth were they doing? To you, there was one simple answer to that: they wanted to embarrass you and scare off the first boyfriend you’ve had in months.

  As an only child, you never experienced what it was like to have a protective sibling watching out for you, but there was no need for one when you had the boys. You love them and understand that they’re looking out for you, but there were times when they could have toned down their protective mode (by a lot), like when you brought your boyfriend over to their shared apartment.

  “So how long have you been seeing our sister?”

  You glanced many times at your boyfriend (you couldn’t afford to take your eyes off of your crazy friends in fear they might do something regrettable) as you assured him, “You know they’re not actually-”

  Haechan waved you off. “We’ve been friends with her since elementary school, some of us since pre-school, so we’re basically family.”

  Jaemin joined with a menacing gaze. “You’re both on a vacation with one of your best friends.”

  “Nana, what-”

  Chenle was the second to cut you off. “And both of them are drowning.”

  Jisung leaned forward with anticipating eyes. “Who do you save?”

  “Hey, that’s ridiculous,” you exclaimed. “We’ve only been going out for two weeks.”

  “Let the guy speak for himself,” Jeno said for the first time, directing his comment to you.

  Renjun nodded in agreement. “He hasn’t spoken since he introduced himself,”

  Those two little angels practically pushed your boyfriend to his deathbed because they knew that there was no right answer: whatever answer your boyfriend chose, they would be dissatisfied and would press for more information, demanding for an explanation. All eyes were on your boyfriend, including yours. You watched your poor partner gulp as the intensity of the moment reached its pinnacle. He averted his gaze to you in a very shaky manner, and you knew that the youngsters had gotten to him. There was going to be no end to this torment.

  ...

 The torment the younger boys gave you and your boyfriend was brutal, but it was nothing compared to the scheme the others plotted. If the younger ones were a pre-screening trial, the others were the real test.

  “So what do you do for a living?”

  “What do you plan on doing once you graduate from college?”

  “Where did you go to high school?”

  “Where did you take our beloved sister out on the first date?”

  “Do you know GCM? Because we all like GCM. Our beloved sister loves GCM.”

  “What flavor of ice cream do you like?”

  “Do you take the first bite of a fish-shaped bread from its tail or head?”

  “Have any of your ex-girlfriends broken up with you because of a personality issue of yours?”

  “Are you sane?”

  That last question was thrown by your peculiar friend Mister Kim Jungwoo. For him, that was a sane question.

  It was one question after another and it was if your boyfriend was participating in some kind of an interrogation by the police, except all of the questions were absolutely ridiculous.

  “Do you like cheese?”

  That was another question asked by, again, Mister Kim Jungwoo, making you scream internally.

  It truly was a tortuous evening, and your friends would not take one second to rest. To your comfort, your boyfriend was perfectly able and answered all of them, though he did so sometimes stuttering not because he was nervous but because the questions were so absurd that he was taken aback.

  It was supposed to be a normal dinner. There was supposed to be eating and pleasant conversations. Instead, there was a bunch of stabbing the chicken in the chicken salad and sipping the glass of wine like tea. Not one bit of that evening was pleasant for you.

  The only person who didn’t say anything was Mark, and you were pleased that there was at least one decent person in the room who respected your space and your boyfriend’s privacy. At least, that was until you walked your boyfriend out the door, profusely apologizing on behalf of your protective pack of wolves. Being the most considerate and understanding person you knew, he shook his head and laughed it off. You loved the way he laughed and the way he was so chill about everything. You were so fortunate to have found someone incredible like him.

  Under the orange light that the entryway provided, his smile was too radiant for you to handle. It was like a magnet. You pulled yourself closer to his body and let your hands travel to his sides.

  “Really? You don’t think that they were a tad too much?” you said, making sure your head was pulled back a little so that he could get a good view of your smile.

  With his hands supporting your back, he answered, “Maybe, but I understand.”

  He seriously was an amazing guy. The electrifying moment, his eyes gazing into yours and your bodies touching with such warmth, had the opportunity to be an amazing one. Of course, someone had to sabotage the moment. You were kind of expecting it. The thing is, it never occurred to you that the one person who was silent the entire time could be the one who stooped the lowest.

  “It’s okay that they love you,” left your boyfriend’s lips before you leaned in.

  “You got that right,” a voice said, popping out of nowhere.

  Behind the two of you was Mark Lee, who was standing there so naturally with a jumbo-sized bag of chips in his hands. His eyes twinkled with no mischief, but his grin was like Cheshire Cat.

  “No kissing on the first meeting with your in-laws,” he said quite loudly, reaching for another chip.

  And that did it.

  “Kissing?!” you heard multiple voices shout.

  You and your boyfriend automatically exchanged looks that mirrored each other’s fright.

  Mark, still grinning, added, “We’ll always be watching you.”

  Before you could usher your boyfriend away, he sent you a quick smile before (quickly) scrambling out the door. At the time, it was safe to say that you wouldn’t be hearing from him for a week (but you didn’t know that he would be willing to meet the chaotic boys again because he was that amazing).

  All you could do was look at your wicked friends standing in front of you at the entryway.

  You shook your head and sighed in defeat. “I’m gonna stay single forever.”

  They simply replied, “Then we’ve done our job.”

[zangyo]

@swordrisen​​ said (inbox):

❛❛ Nope ! No peeking ! ❜❜ Finger tips settled again eyes , warmth weaving within her own. ❛❛ A little further , Kento - kun. ❜❜ Guiding him along with her voice , she leads him to the engawa ; warm sunlight seeping through clouds , running across the engawa & casting away any chill. Slowly palms shift away , revealing to him a party ; a small gathering , just herself , her fathers & his parents. A commonplace event by now ( thrown every year since she has declared them friends. ) ❛❛ Happy birthday , Kento - kun. Grow older even more. ❜❜ Finger tips slip forth , grasping his own & bringing him towards the small picnic setting ( breads , concealed for freshness & various other foods. ) ❛❛ Let us bestow the Birthday King his crown ! ❜❜ 

Paper crown swiftly stolen from a rather offended looking Narajiro , Koto messily splats it 'pon his head & instantly bows her head , striking her hand forth. ❛❛ All the cheers for the Birthday King ! Except. ❜❜ There's a sort of evil that weaves 'pon her features , glancing 'pon her fathers who hurry forth ( yet , she is the fastest ! ) Limbs slip tight around his frame , features buried again his heart to hear it's beating ( alive , ever alive , he has made it one more year. ) She quickly looks back at her fathers , both seemingly pouting. ❛❛ Haha ! Beat you to the first hug , shi - poop holes ! ❜❜ She has never cursed in front of Kento's parents , she's not doing it now ! Narajiro stomps over with his present pout , yanking his daughter off carefully & pulling Kento into a hug. 

❛❛ You get to hug him all the time ! He's like my son , you know , I never get to hug him ! He's gotten too tall. I remember when he was just a squirt , my tiny sonny boy. ❜❜ Fake tears quickly fill Narajiro's eyes ; Shakuhachi reaches forth to grasp both of them by the collars & pull them away from Kento before he approaches , gently ruffling his hair with a warm smile. 

❛❛ Happy birthday , kiddo. I tried to tell you when you were 16 to get away from this family but now you're stuck with us & we wouldn't have it any other way. Thank you for being born , Kento. ❜❜ Narajiro & Koto , who were pulling at each other's cheeks , stops only to look over at them both affectionately. 

❛❛ Thank you for being by my side , Kento - kun. ❜❜ Koto speaks out , tenderly as ever. ❛❛ Thanks for coming into our lives , Ken - kun. We love you. ❜❜ Narajiro adds his own bit , his tonality soft & without teasing. 

❛❛ Happy birthday. Now let's eat before the bread gets hard ! ❜❜

     NANAMI NEVER KNEW WHAT Koto was up to sometimes. He could be going about his normal daily routine, and then the next, was being tugged off for some new ‘adventure’ that came to mind. It was of little wonder that she and Gojo got along as well as they did when both often were spontaneous in what they did throughout the week or even a given moment. Thus, when hands came to settle over his eyes, as confused as he was, Nanami had little issue with allowing her to guide him along to who knows where. ❝This is a bit suspicious, Koto-san,❞ he mumbled, lips turned downwards into a slight frown. Was this going to be something bothersome? Then again, despite her and Gojo both sharing in that playful demeanor, he doubted Koto would purposely waste his time (he hoped). His entire plan for this afternoon was to lie back on his couch with his book in hand and allow soft music to play in the background while he sipped a nice cup of tea.

     Of course, that was what he did all the time when he was back at his apartment, but that was not the point. It was still his favored means of relaxing despite the simplicity of it. As they walked, he could feel the warmth of the sun upon his skin, soft and gentle rather than oppressive as it could be during the summer. It was a nice little trek even if he was at a loss as to what was going on. Eventually, he came to a stop as Koto did, her hands slowly moving away so he could see what was around him. ❝A-Ah? What’s this?❞ What were Koto’s parents doing here? Or his own for that matter? Was there some event going on that he was unaware of? There were a plethora of different foods present, the very scene one that reminded him of a potential celebration, although for the life of him, he couldn’t think of anything big that would warrant all of this.

     ‘Let us bestow the Birthday King his crown!’ Birthday…birthday – oh! It was his birthday today! Nanami never really paid attention to this day, and so, it was easy to forget about it most of the time until the next day when he realized, ‘oh yeah, I’m a year older.’ Paper crown placed upon his head, he stood there, dumbfounded with mouth partially agape and eyes, no doubt, wide behind those colored lenses of his sunglasses. ❝T-This…❞ T-This was unnecessary. There didn’t need to be a large scale celebration for his sake. Just a text that said, ‘Happy Birthday!’ or something small like buying him a cup of coffee would have more than sufficed. Nanami would have been grateful regardless just for the fact that someone thought the day of his birth was so important that they would take time out of their day to remind him of such.

     He hardly had a chance to say anything else before a grunt sounded in his throat, Koto clinging tightly to him as she grinned triumphantly at her fathers for beating them in being the first to give Nanami a hug. His own parents were in the background, expression filled with amusement as they watched the entire scene unfold. This was probably the first time in a good long while that he was spending such a day with them. All his previous birthdays were spent alone and in his apartment. It took time for the confusion upon his features to melt away, his expression softening as a small smile touched his lips soon after. Everyone was here for him, huh? For a long time, he had wrongfully looked at the world as if he was alone when that was hardly ever the case. Not once had he ever been, and this was a reminder of how incorrect that thinking had been.

     Koto yanked away by Narajiro, he was given his present and pulled into a tight, warm hug. The ‘dramatics’ between the man and his daughter entertained him a great deal, the small smile he wore growing just a tad bit larger. ❝Sonny boy is such an embarrassing name…❞ That nickname was never going to go away, was it? He was forever going to be ‘sonny boy’ all the way until he was some older man finally retired and living his life going on adventures around the world. Both Koto and Narajiro were moved away soon after, however, Sakuhachi ‘saving’ him from their doting just enough so that he could ruffle Nanami’s carefully put together appearance with a brush of his hand through blond locks. The words that came touched him, overwhelmed him, even. It was hard to believe that he had left this much of an impact on the lives of others. This was the kind of reminder he had needed back then, or maybe, it was just something he had forgotten along the way as he had sat in his office chair, eyes staring blankly at figures and documents that would forever endlessly had taken his time.

     Feeling embarrassed, he glanced away, clearing his throat and attempting to keep some form of composure in place even if there was hardly any need (it had long since shattered into pieces). ❝Thank you all for being here, and for all of this.❞ He held his present close, eyes trailing along the scene again and committing it to memory. ❝I will always be grateful for all of you.❞ And he meant that. Every word. With a polite bow of his head soon after, he made his way towards the food laid out with intent to enjoy himself. This was a wonderful day that he would never forget -- another memory to hold close and recall on another day.

[elm-lawrence]

MUTANT: THE BEGINNING // Chapter One: The News

Stephanie stifled a yawn as a customer walked to her register. This was her first customer in hours which, she mused, was the side-effect of working at a twenty-four-hour corner shop. As she rung up the sale and exchanged pleasantries with the middle-aged women, she glanced at the clock and groaned inwardly when it only read 2:23am. Only an hour and a half left  

she thought to herself in an effort to lift her own spirits, but only succeeded in driving them lower than they were before.  

She handed the lady her change, bid her a good night and then watched her wander slowly out the door. A blast of chilled wind snuck its way into the shop, for the brief moment the door was open. Stephanie shivered, and tried not the think about her walk home. Having had enough of standing still, and seeing no more customers, she decided to go for a stroll around the isles. As she walked, she made mental notes of what needed restocking, all while very conscious of the fact she would never remember them all.

She heard movement behind her and turned. Jed, the only other staff member working this late on a Thursday, was struggling with a heavy box at the door to the stock room. She ran to help him.

“I’ve told you before, J, it’s bad for your back to lift these on your own!” Jed was a 40-something year old man with tanned skin, dark hair and the bushiest eye-brows Stephanie had ever seen. He had been off with a bad back no less than 6 months ago and had come back with strict instructions from his doctor to take it easy but seemed to take this more as a suggestion than an order.

“I’m fine, Steph! It’s not even that heavy!” He said, huffing slightly, once they’d set it down.

“Really? So, the hyperventilating is just, what, your normal reaction to movement?” She said, fixing him with her best withering stare. She got a playful glare in response.

“You ought to learn to respect your elders, young lady. You’re, what, 20? 21?”

“23.”

“23! That’s still a baby, if you ask me. Far too young to have such an attitude.”

“And you’re far too old to be lifting heavy boxes by yourself, clearly.” She teased back, enjoying the only source of entertainment she had.

“Why, you cheeky-” He cut himself off when the bell over the door rang out, signalling someone entering the shop.  

“Go on, run along now.” He gestured at her dismissively as he pulled out his box cutter and began stocking cans onto the shelves beside him. She sighed and hurried back to her post, smiling as she passed the customer but got no acknowledgement in response. Stephanie frowned as she moved to her counter and continued to keep an eye on the man. He was around 25-ish, dressed in black jeans, a dark blue sweater and a grey beanie. He seemed dazed and unfocused as he searched the shelves. As she inspected him, she could see sweat on his skin despite the cool March night temperatures and the shops general lack of insulation. Stephanie almost classed him as suspicious but having worked the night shift so many times over her year and a half of employment, it took a lot more than knitted headwear and unseasonal sweat to peak her interested. Afterall, most who did their shopping at corner shops at 3am where not what one would consider ‘average.’

He approached the counter with a few bags of crisps, a fizzy drink and some painkillers. She rung him up, keeping an eye on his. For his part, his own eyes were rapidly darting back and forth, seemingly unable to focus on any one thing for more than a few seconds.  

“That’ll be £5.40, please.” She said, watching him warily now. The neighbourhood the shop was based in had a bad reputation which, in her opinion, was not completely true, but the occasionally unsavoury character found their way through. The man did not seem to hear her, his eyes fixated now on something just over her left shoulder. She fought the urge to turn and remained her composure.

“Sir?” His eyes focused on her now, seeming to realise for the first time that she was there, waiting for his response.  

“Huh?” He asked, and even from this she could tell he would slur his words if he was able for form any sort of coherent sentence.

“That will be £5.40, please.” She repeated, gesturing to the items on the counter.

“Oh! Yeah, yeah.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled £10 note and dropped it on the counter. “Keep the change.” He said and gathered his things in his arms before unsteadily stumbled out into the street, the bell chiming his exit. Stephanie put the money in the till and glanced up as Jed walked over.

“He was a strange one.”

“Looked like he was high on something. And he got sweat on my counter.” She grimaced at the droplets and fished around under the desk for the disinfectant and cloth she kept there. She was no stranger to strange people, and she did not particularly mind most of them so long as they kept their strange off her counter.

“What time you here till?” Jed asked her as she swept the cloth over the counter.

“Four am, almost home time. You?” Jed scowled at the glass window looking out onto the dark empty streets, as if blaming his work life on the night-time sky.

“Six. Josh said he couldn’t start any earlier so Bossman's got me pulling his weight.” Stephanie shook her head.

“Typical.” She sighed.

#

The clock struck 4:00 as she clocked out, yelling her goodbye and good luck to Jed, she shrugged her coat on and shivered when she stepped into the cool night air. Stephanie lived relatively close to her work which, when her boss seemed to have sealed her fate to work until stupid hours of the morning until her death, was a blessing.  

Pulling the coat tighter around her and shoving her hands in her pockets, she walked quickly through the streets, which already had the beginnings of a frost settling upon them. She turned the corner, sped up the streets and reached her apartment building in no more than ten minutes. She took her keys from her pocket, freezing night air immediately seizing her skin in its icy grip, unlocked the door, shut it heavily behind her and climbed the stairs to the fourth floor. She stopped outside apartment 130 and unlocked the door before hurrying inside.

Once safely inside her home, she shed her coat and jumper, cranked up the heating a tad, and sat heavily on her sofa with a sigh of relief.

“God this sofa has never felt so good,” she murmured, flicking the TV onto the late-night news channel. After allowing the news to sufficiently scare her about the current state of the world, Stephanie decided food would make her feel better again and muted the TV as she moved to her kitchen. Unfortunately, she discovered, for someone who worked somewhere people buy food from, she was horrendously understocked.  

“What a terrible excuse for an adult I am.” She scolded herself, slipping some partially stale bread in the toaster and plunging it down as she rooted the butter out of the fridge. She quickly got changed, slipping her pyjama shorts on just as the toaster popped. She sat back down, having completed her gourmet meal, and glanced back at the TV. The presenter was the same as before; a middle-age white man with greying hair, slicked back to give the illusion of volume. This time, however, he looked worried. His eyes held uncertainty as they moved across the page, and his mouth was moving quickly. Stephanie frowned, then unmuted the TV while she ate and his words flooded the room, like a tidal wave of bad news.

“-urging people to stay in their homes. The illness seems to spread via contact with body fluids, however nothing is confirmed. As of yet, the illness seems to be confined to Russia, with their borders being shut down and any and all British personnel of importance transported via private airways back to the safety of the United Kingdom. These officials are being closely monitored and quarantined for clinical signs. Any updates will be broadcast as soon as we have them.” With that, the broadcast cut off abruptly and adverts began rolling across her screen.

Stephanie muted the TV again and sat back, crunching into her last slice of toast. Just then, a clattering from her bedroom, and movement towards her sofa.

“Bout time you woke up!” She called light-heartedly, as her Siamese cat hopped up onto the back of her sofa, mewing and purring. She moved the plate on her lap to the coffee table and picked him up, cuddling him into her body.  

“Good morning handsome boy, I take it you enjoyed your time alone? No parties while I was gone?” Her purred in response, rubbing up against her. Technically speaking, Sye was not her cat per say, rather one that seemed to invade her home every few days for a nap while she was at work. Stephanie assumed he lived somewhere in the building, probably a loud apartment with annoying kids, and her bed was more his nap pad than anything else. When she first saw him in the halls, he’d followed her back to her flat and even since then Sye would show up, completely randomly and out-of-the-blue like the terrible house guest he was.

“You hungry?” She asked him, and he meowed loudly at her, jumping onto the arm of the chair and flicking his tail.

“An enthusiastic yes, then!” She pushed herself up, shoved some cat food onto a plate and put it on the kitchen floor. While Sye inhaled his food, she went to her bedroom and flicked the lights on, sighing at the phone charger that was now on the floor.  

“I invite you into my home, feed you, keep you warm, let you nap… and this is how you repay me?” She muttered, picking it up and placing it back on her nightstand. “Typical.”

She grabbed her laptop, plopped down on her bed and opened it up. She noted dully that it was nearly 5am.  

As she settled into her nightly routine of aimless scrolling, she heard a loud meow followed by the faint sounds of claws on her rug.

“Hey!” She yelled as she cast her laptop aside and ran to her front door. “We will have none of that in this home, sir.” She scolded Sye, as he sat down in front of her doors, eyes wide and expecting.

“I do hope you behave better for your real family. Go on, shoo.” She opened her door and he meowed once before strolling slowing down the hallway towards the stairs. Shaking her head, she flicked the sound back up on the TV.  

“A press release from Government officials has been released.” Stated the white-haired news caster. “Much like earlier, people are being urged to stay in their homes, however those in the centre of heavily populated areas are being urged to find refuge in less densely populated areas if it is safe to do so. Public transport may be affected. It has been released that this new pandemic can turn people violent. There have been reports of random attacks on strangers, wives attacking husbands, even children attacking parents. I will reiterate at this point to stay inside. The virus is spread through contact with those already infected. Research into this new virus is being conducted, but due to the large number of people reporting symptoms the work is moving slowly. Please, if anyone near you is presenting symptoms, restrain them for their own safety, until medical officials can reach you. Do not take them to the hospitals yourself, for your own safety. Be safe.”

And with that, the broadcaster disappeared off screen and was replaced not by the usual music, by but a black screen. Stephanie stood still, staring at the dark TV screen, giving herself a few more moments to properly absorb the story.

Suddenly, from outside there came the sound of squealing tires and metal scraping.

She ran to the window, broken from her fear by the thundering noise, peering outside into the streets. This early in the morning, the run-down area was relatively quiet, with the occasional noise of traffic from the nearby main roads. With the sun rising over the city, casting it in an eerie early morning shadow, Stephanie saw a car on the pavement, a lamppost bent over the dented bonnet. She watched for any movement, reaching blindly for her phone to dial for an ambulance, when someone stepped out from the wreckage.  

As she called for an ambulance, someone emerged from the building opposite hers, rushing towards the accident. The driver was leaning against their car, head slumped with a hand over their chest. The concerned stranger reached them, reached out a hand, before the driver’s head snapped up. Stephanie could not see the expression on either face from her vantage point, however she got a bad feeling about the exchange by the way the stranger froze a few feet from the driver. She fought the irrational urge to go outside and see if he was okay.

The phone was still ringing. She had been so wrapped up in watching the scene unfold she’d forgotten she was calling the ambulance. Why was it still ringing? She’d dialled minutes ago, how long did the emergency services take to answer the phone?  

Then the ringing stopped, and she took her eyes off the scene before her to frown at her phone, checking if she still had power. She did. The call had dropped, her signal had dropped. She heard a scream and looked back to see the driver running after the stranger, arms outstretched and movements wild like a starved predator. Even from her room, she heard his growling, like a rabid animal. Eyes wide, heart racing, she drew the curtains.

[smitten-miqitten]

Loss

Ao3 link

The Warrior of Light was drunk, Cid observed. The way Thancred told it, she was well and truly sauced, positively plastered. While she hadn’t had all that many drinks, the booze at the Forgotten Knight was strong stuff, and the intent behind Thancred’s invitation had been aimed at forgetting her ever mounting worries and pain, if only for a little while. 

“I hadn’t expected her to actually agree”, Thancred had said as he enlisted Cid’s aid in finding his uncommon drinking companion, who had slipped away whilst Thancred had gone to the loo. “She always turned drinks down before. It would appear she handles them far more poorly than I anticipated”. Thancred himself looked a pitiful mixture of tipsy and sheepish. While he would normally be the one to ask if someone needed locating, he didn’t fully trust himself in his current state.

When they did find her, she was sat on a secluded bench in the Pillars, one strangely far from the main thoroughfare and positioned with a wall to its back, looking out on the near endless clouded vista that surrounded the city. She was shivering, woefully under dressed for Ishgardian nights in the snow, having left her coat at the inn. Wretched and pitiful, she looked now on the outside the way Cid had imagined she felt on the inside when he had asked after her earlier that day.

…..

Era had been spending quite a lot of time at the Skysteel Manufactury, helping Cid, Biggs, and Wedge with whatever she could, observing the things they made, or simply enjoying their company while reading some book or another. This in of itself had not seemed all that unusual to Cid, as she visited often anyway, until it occurred to him that she was now there every day, without exception.

He saw that she spent as little time as possible around Alphinaud, Aymeric, and the entirety of the Fortemps household. She couldn’t face them, she explained after he pulled her aside to ask if she was alright. Haurchefant was dead because of her, and she couldn’t face them.

Alphinaud saw her as some indomitable pillar of strength, and grew visibly uncomfortable to see her upset. She had to hide her pain from him.

Aymeric and Haurchefant had been friends. Surely Aymeric, though he’d never admit to as much, blamed her in his heart of hearts.

And gods, to sleep under the same roof he grew up under, to break bread with the very family that was now mourning because of her inattention, her weakness, her failure.… She had no right to the space they occupied, the air they breathed.

…..

She had been crying the day she and Cid met, back at Camp Drybone, the aftermath of the Scions’ butchering too much to process, but those tears were far different from the ones on her face now. The tears then were slight and accompanied a look of utter confusion at their presence, for she had never in her admittedly short memory cried before that day. The tears she shed now wracked her with bitter sobs, her face blotchy and eyes a puffy, anguished red.

She sat with her knees pulled to her chest, arms drawn tight around them in a weak attempt to keep warm. Or perhaps it was simply to provide herself a modicum of comfort, for she refused the coat Thancred proffered.

“Alcohol didn’t help, Thancred”, she said in a quiet, oddly slow, uneven way, as if she were trying to keep herself coherent, full knowing the drink had turned her tongue to lead and her thoughts to haze. “I still feel it. My chest…the pain won’t go away. Consumes my every thought. Thought drinking would numb it… didn’t, hoped the cold might….”

Her words drifted off, gaze tracking a hawk flying in the distance, distracted. Her mouth set in a firm line, downturned into a pained frown. Eyes turning toward Cid, Era refocused.

“I’m terrible”, she bemoaned, eyes welling with fresh tears, joining those freezing to her cheeks. “Been using you. You and Biggs and Wedge…I don’t think about it when I’m with you lot. It’s so easy to be around you all…you didn’t know him. Not well enough to… to…”. Her words devolved to guilty sobs. Cid sat beside her, wrapping her in the coat Thancred brought, ignoring her protests, and enveloped her in a one armed hug, simultaneously trying to warm her up and retain some respect for her space.

“To blame you?” Thancred offered in a hushed, knowing tone, sitting on her free side, though he refrained from contact. “That’s what you think, right, that they all blame you for it. They don’t, of course, and you know so, but it’s rather hard to continue to blame yourself without their ire to back it up, no?”

Her wince told him he was right on the money. And of course he was; who better than he knew the feeling of misplaced responsibility for the loss of a loved one, the feel of imagined blood on one’s hands? His eyes, or rather visible eye, grew distant and wistful, looking through her rather than at. “And you need to blame someone, because you can’t bring yourself to blame Haurchefant. Despite the fact it was his fault, his choice…” He paused, a tad startled as Era lunged clumsily for him, teeth bared and eyes wild. How dare he?!

Cid held her back gently, but gave Thancred a look that plainly stated he didn’t at all like where this conversation was going. He cleared his throat, taking over for his irreverent companion, “I think what our friend here means to say is that you had no sway over Ser Haurchefant’s decision. He did what he chose to do, no more and no less. He deemed your safety paramount, and whether you feel you are worthy of his sacrifice or not, he plainly thought you were worth protecting. You can’t blame yourself. He never would have wanted that”.

Whether Cid and Thancred’s words had offered her any comfort could not be discerned, anguish not leaving her eyes. Era ceased speaking entirely, however, and pulled the jacket more tightly around herself. A smile better suits a hero, he had said, but what kind of hero was she? 

Cid, who had now taken to running his hands up and down her arms, trying and failing to warm her enough to stop her shivering, decided they had lingered in the cold for quite long enough. “I’m sure Alphinaud and the rest are worried sick about you. Might we take you back to the manor, before you catch a cold?”

The question was merely a formality, however, as Cid had no intention of letting her do ought else but get somewhere warm, and saw it as a matter of urgency. Thancred too looked apprehensive at the state of her, seeing that she was undoubtedly already ill.

Not waiting for a response, and not receiving one beyond a small almost imperceptible nod, the pair attempted to help her to her feet. She stumbled badly, legs less than responsive in their state of inebriation and chill. Opting for haste, Cid picked Era up, carrying her princess fashion and covering her in her coat like a blanket.

This received a raised eyebrow from Thancred, who cursedly never seemed to miss a thing, prompting annoyed shake of the head from Cid. It wasn’t what Thancred drunkenly assumed, wasn't like that; he merely wanted to get her home as quickly as possible.

Well…

Maybe it was a little bit like that. Everything involving her nowadays was, just a little bit, but his motives were in no way ulterior. Not now, not ever. On that level, he felt he understood the knight she mourned so strongly; an odd sort of kinship borne of similar affections. He just wanted, first and foremost, to see her safe and happy. And at the moment, she was neither.

The trio made hastily toward the Fortemps Manor, Thancred and Cid listening to Era mutter weak, drunken apologies and responding with assurances that it was fine, she was no trouble. When the door guard, recognizing the Warrior of Light, asked about her besotten state, they simply said she’d had a tad too much to drink of unexpectedly strong ale. No mention was made of what it was that drove her to drink, for that was her own affair and no one else’s.

Artoriel and Emmanelain wore ill concealed, frantic looks at the state of her as she was carried to her room to be tucked into bed by a positively befuddled and worried Alphinaud. Her fireplace was stoked to blazing by Honoroit, the sweet boy ever level headed and practical. Thancred, too tipsy to be of much use doing ought else, went to make  her tea. Tataru fussed with her blankets, adding layer after layer before cuddling up next to Era, her presence neither welcomed nor rejected by the now unresponsive Miqo'te.

Eventually, a chirugeon was thankfully deemed unnecessary, due in large part to Cid’s earlier precautions. At least two days bedrest was mandated by Count Edmont, however, ensuring she would be well despite herself. Though not a word on the subject had been uttered, twas plain on the Count's  the face that he knew the reason for her ill advised actions, his own heart breaking alongside hers.

Before leaving her in the ample hands of the Scions and Fortemps family, Cid tried again to speak with Era, seeking still to console her. His attempts were largely fruitless, her only response being a quiet, heartfelt “thank you” issued from a face buried deep into its pillow. Her hand reached for his, and squeezed.

Time mends all wounds, and in time she would be better. But for moment she missed her friend, and drifted in and out of dreams where he yet lived.

[xsunqueensx]

TWO FOR TRYING

Jooheon took me into a section of the the castle that was hidden to most guests, the servant’s quarter. The smell of fresh bread reached my nose and it instantly made me hungry.

A few older women were hard at work peeling potatoes while others were chopping some carrots and onions. The smell was delicious, it reminded me of home. “Hungry? We didn’t really get to eat.” I nodded and he led me into the next section of the kitchen. We turned the corner and the smell intensified; at this point I was practically drooling. “Well, well, well; are they not feeding you enough up there?” A heavy-set middle aged woman said, approaching the both of us. “Aunt May, it’s been awhile.” Joohenon headed straight to the woman and hugged her tightly. “My gracious, what on earth happened here?” Her expression went from sheer joy, to confusion, concern and or disappointment; I wasn’t sure, it was too soon to tell. “Now you know your mother raised you better than this” she said checking him over once more. “Com’on, You know I was raised by wolves.” Jooheon said bouncing his eyebrows. “Hush that now...even if it’s true.” The woman joked with bright eyes. The two shared a genuine laugh. “Aunt May, I want you to meet someone. This is our queen, well as of tomorrow... “Ms. May, wiped her hands across her apron and then curtseyed with a lop sided smile. “Highness, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” The poor woman, I could only imagine what the two of us looked like soaked to the bone like this. “Please, please we don’t have to stand on pleasantries; it’s nice to meet you Ms. May. Please excuse my attire, our dear Jooheon has an appetite for bringing out the mischief in the best of us.” At this Ms. May let out a boisterous laugh. “No truer words have ever been spoken; he’s had me question myself a many a time!” The woman started to dig into a bin hidden behind some cabinets. She handed Jooheon and I a couple of towels. “Here, let me fix you something warm to eat.” Joohenon be a gentleman and make her comfortable, won’t you.” I smiled at how freely she talked to him, it reminded me of a mother and son. Jooheon patted the cushion of the bay window, he held my hand as I tried to hop up modestly. His cheeks turned red as I tried to keep my dress together but, I was failing miserably; the dress seemed to have a mind of it’s own. “Here, this should warm you a tad; Jooheon has your mother seen you two?” I grabbed the bowl, it had to be as old as me. “Sure did, you know how she has a sixth sense for spoiling any kind of fun.” I sampled the soup and it sent a chill through me. “Delicious!” Joohenon and Ms. May both lit up, “Thank you child, have as much as you wish.” I enjoyed their banter for a while, it reminded me of papa. “So child, how are you enjoin’ Kydith? Was the tide welcoming?” I nodded, “Quite.” “The grounds are marvelous, not to mention the food! I’ve met some interesting people thus far, the townsfolk were so welcoming. I honestly couldn’t ask for much more, well… maybe some dry clothes…” The three of us continued to converse. I learned that Baekhyun was indeed the castle fuck boy. “Charlene almost burnt down the entire damn kitchen, I found the two of them in the flour cupboard.” I choked on my beverage, “I’m telling you, that man is nothing but trouble.” Jooheon spoke next, “That man is a prodigy. He’s as dangerous with a sword as he is with his coc- um, bed habits…” Ms. May eyed him, “What have I told you about that filthy talk?!” A deep sigh left my fiancé, “I’m sorry May, old habits die hard.” I nudged him with my elbow. “Well, this kitchen isn’t going to run itself; Majesty, it’s such a treat to meet you in person. If you need anything, you know where to find me; especially if Jooheon is giving you grief.” Her eyes were warm and piercing into me, “Yes ma’am.”

“She was pleasant, how long have you known her?” I asked locking my fingers in his as we headed up a narrow passage into the castle. “Since birth, she’s been like a second mother to me.” There was something so gentle in the way he spoke of her, “I can tell she cares deeply for you.” The smile he gave me next was beaming, “I hope the two of you can become good friends.” Before I knew it, Jooheon led us to a paneled wall and pushed it open. We were right back inside the castle, “Well, that’s neat.” My fingers ran over the perfectly sealed edge of the hidden door. “Mhmm, we have several of these throughout the castle; I can’t count the amount of beatings I got as a child for playing in these with my cousin.” We waited as servants made their way past us carrying a pillar over their shoulder, no doubt it was for tomorrow’s events. Butterflies tickled me at the thought, I remembered the clock was just ticking away, every single second bringing us closer to our eternity. “Are you referring to Prince Kihyun?” Jooheon nodded, “Tell me about him?” We turned a corner and the castle started to look familiar, I believe we were headed back towards the main entrance way. “Well, at first glance he can come off a bit calloused but; once you get to know him, his kindness might blind you.” I thought briefly of my sister, “ I think marriage will do home well, he needs a womanly touch as he’s a little rough around the edges. Growing up without a mother’s nurturing touch will take it’s toll on anyone.” I sighed, “I can relate, I never got to meet my mother, I often wonder how I can miss someone I never even met but, Mothers are special in that way.” Jooheon squeezed my hand. “His mother, she was executed, right?” His face turned somber, “Yeah, my uncle is one cruel man. I’m still not sure if he’s truly moved past it yet. The relationship between him and his father is beyond strained. After she passed Kihyun built a wall and very few people have been able to climb it.” I frowned, “How sad.”

“Ah speak of the devil, I presume he’s been nothing short of a gentleman?” I sucked my teeth as Na’eva and Kihyun starred bugged eyed. “Never mind us, what the hell happened here?” The prince asked. I went to speak but Jooheon beat me to the punch, “We went for a swim, duh.” Na’eva and I both dropped our heads into the palm of our hands. Kihyun took my sister’s hand and gave it a light kiss, “Please excuse me; I have some business I must tend to, I’ve put it off for as long as I can.”The perplexed look on Na’eva’s face didn’t slip my notice. “Shall I see you for dinner?” Kihyun asked, still holding her hand. “Of course highness, I’ve enjoyed chatting with you; thank you for the tour.” I watched as she took her hand back a little too hastily. “Jooheon, I think I’ll retreat to my chamber for a rest; will you be alright with out me?” Jooheon grabbed his chest and played as though he was about to faint on the spot, “How will I ever man-age-oh no, I’m not going to make it.” I laughed at his non-sense once more, “I’m serious, are my services required else where?” His brow flicked up and I could feel my face getting warm. Those damn dimples. “Ahem.” We both came out of our silent conversation. Na’eva stood there looking at her shoes. “No, you’re free to do as you wish; let someone know if you need anything.” I curtseyed and he bowed before leaving us there. “You have some serious explaining to do missy. Come on, lets get you out of what ever this is…” Na’eva said holding up a completely limp feather.

“A sword fight, huh?” My sister asked. “Yeah it was actually a lot of fun, he’s pretty quick on his feet.” She laughed, “I can’t wait to tell father.” I gasped, “What, you wouldn’t?” I splashed water at her, the bath felt wonderfully warm and inviting. “So tell me about your afternoon, you and Kihyun looked rather, what’s the word? Oh, awkward.” Na’eva rolled her eyes and completely submerged into the water.

“WHAT!?? She choked you?” Jooheon stood there in disbelief, “She misinterpreted something I said and just reacted. I still can’t believe that was her first response.” Kihyun said honestly confused. “Nathan, can you bring some wine?” Jooheon asked, knowing good and well they we’re both going to need it.”

“He’s not romantic- at all! He is devilishly handsome though so, I guess that helps with his assholey tendencies? Hell, I don’t know. He wants me to come and visit Peth, much sooner rather than later. If the circumstances didn’t seem so dire,I wouldn’t even go.” I ran my fingers through my thick curls, “Dire?” Ameerah asked. “Yes, apparently Pethians are plagued with such a low morale; he invited me to come and let the citizens lay eyes on their future queen; to remind them that a new era is soon to come.” I loosely braided my hair, “Not to mention, they haven’t seen you since you were a child-I’m sure that would be refreshing.” Na’Eva was still lost in thought, “What aren’t you telling me?” For a brief moment, she weighed if should…but she didn’t. “Nothing, I’m just still a little shaken from my meeting with Kihyun. C’mon, let’s hurry- I have make sure you’re ready for supper. Lord know’s we’ll have to redeem you after today’s afternoon dip.” She did this all the time, brushing things right off- it infuriates me to no end. If I didn’t want to know I wouldn’t have asked in the first place. Truth be told, she looked like she needed to share more than I needed to ask. “Yeah, yeah- BUT NO FEATHERS!”

“Now, you see why I need your assistance?” Kihyun said with his arms crossed. “Man, for starters, let’s not piss off your fiancé to a point of physical violence.” Kihyun dropped his hands to his side, “ I told you that wasn’t my fault!” Jooheon spoke over him, “Secondly, you’re acting as though you’ve never romanced anyone befo..re…oh….yeah, well you’ve come to the right person. So, what did you two do today? Tour the gardens? Eat lunch? Explore the castle?” Jooheon said with vigor. “I found her in a hallway and took her back to my room, we spoke for a bit and then she choked me.” Jooheon downed his glass, “Fuck…Ki, this is going to be harder than I thought. Well, baby-steps I suppose. Tonight, you’re going to have dinner together- just the two of you. I’ve already planned a dinner with Ameerah. Granted, it’s a little non traditional to not eat with the house before the wedding so, we’ll break away for dessert. “Ki, I’m leaving you in charge of your table; decorate it as you see fit. Nothing bland! Remember she’s a princess….YOUR princess, try to woo her. You got this.” Jooheon said placing a hand on his cousins shoulder. Kihyun nodded, “Piece of cake.” Jooheon flashed his megawatt smile, “That’s the spirit, now chop chop!”

Jooheon was having a ball, he adored the idea of spoiling his fiancé. “Hmm, lets go with the pink.” He said to a servant in the kitchen, “She looked rather pretty in it this afternoon.” The servant agreed and began decorating the strawberries. “What sort of flowers do you suppose would match?” Jooheon asked, jutting his hip to the side.

“Orchids my lord,I hear she’s loved them as a child.” Jooheon looked at the servant stunned, “Wow, how’d you know that?” The servant’s cheeks turned a bright pink, “You’re mother highness, she’s quite thorough.” Jooheon rolled his eyes, “Indeed she is. Alright, Orchids it is; I’m in your hands.” He added with a smile.

This was an absolute disaster, Kihyun was realizing that he didn’t know much about his queen. He sat with a pen in hand making a list of things he assumed most any woman would enjoy. However, he only had two items; himself and her. An exasperated sigh left him, “Damnit. Damn it all to hell!” He knew he needed help but, from who? Not Jooheon, he was busy with his own endeavor to capture Queen Ameerah’s heart. He didn’t dare ask Ameerah, he was sure her mind was on much more important things at hand. Kihyun stood up from his desk and decided that a walk would do his mind good. As Kihyun made his way through the castle, he noticed many of the wedding decorations were starting to come together nicely. He couldn’t help but smile, his beloved, goofy cousin was finally getting married. A lopsided grin came over him, along with some heartwarming memories. “How many times do I have to tell you, I want more silk on these chairs.” Kihyun was quickly kicked out of his own thoughts as the queen mother walked past him with a gentleman. He looked vaguely familiar, Kihyun thought for a brief moment before it hit him. Jamison, that was his name. He hadn’t seen him since they we’re kids. “Pardon me Queen mother but, I must beg of some assistance from your current company.” Katherine eyes bulged a bit at his request, she looked at Jamison and nodded. “That’s perfectly fine, I must review the menu for this evening. Jamison, I appreciate you keeping this old queen company. If my nephew gives you any trouble, come find me. She said picking up her hefty skirt and quickly floating across the marble floor. Jamison smiled and bowed. “My king, how may I be of service?” Jamison tried to control his heartbeat as a wave of jealousy swelled in him. “How have you enjoyed your time in Thear?” Kihyun asked. “My lord, Thear has treated mother and I well. We’ve been very busy keeping our promise to you lord, teaching your queen the ways of our kingdom.”Jamison could feel the bile rising in his throat, he hated this small talk and calling Na’eva anyone’s except his. “You’re both to be commended, I’ve heard great things. I hear you’ve become quite the opponent with a sword?” Jamison laughed, “Well, that depends on who you ask. Remember, my duty is to teach and protect; I’m only doing what’s asked of me highness.” Kihyun grinned at his candor. “Very well then, I have another task for you.” Jamison raised a brow, “I’m always up for a challenge majesty.”

“Na’eva, which earrings? Crystals or the diamonds?” The two took turns holding the current options over her silk and pearl gown. The diamonds looked very brilliant as the lights bounced off of them, yet the crystals had a very soft glow that swallowed any color it was against. The girls squinted and replied at the same time, “Diamonds.” That happened quite often, finishing each other’s sentences or thoughts. “So back to your afternoon dip, how handsome was he wet?” Ameerah cut her eyes at her sister and laughed, “I can’t even put it into words- his body looked incredible underneath his shirt.” A blush hit her cheeks again, “His smile could talk me into just about anything….I’m terrified at how easily he tempts me.” Na’eva perked up at that last line, “Tempts you? What ever do you mean? You did save a little fun for tomorrow evening, did you not?” A giant smile creeped across her lips, “RUDE! You’ve lost all story privileges!” The two shared a laugh and continued to get dressed. Na’eva traced the brim of her eyes with dark coal, “Have you given much thought to tomorrow evening?” Ameerah blotted her lips with mint leaves and rouge. “Of course I have, I’m every bit anticipating and dreading parts of that ceremony.” Na’eva nodded, a royal wedding will take it’s toll on anyone; especially, the happy couple. Na’eva nodded, her sister would be taking the final step into womanhood. “Well, hopefully your reign will boil down to more than intimacy, childbirth and being obedient. Jooheon seems to have a great reputation amongst his people though, the air about him seems, different?” Ameerah sighed, “Tell me about it! He’s a great listener and has just a keen interest in everything it seems, I don’t know I could be partial? I certainly hope not, I hate how long it takes getting to know someone but, it seems like he’s excited to try to. I honestly can’t complain- that’s more than most queens get in a lifetime.” The two shared a comfortable silence and started on their hair. “So, do you think the sex will be good?” Ameerah twisted a curl into her palm. “Sister!” The two giggled. “I’m serious, if all else fails, may the gods’ grant you the perfect cock!” Na’eva said with a complete straight face. “Well, since we’re speaking on his member, I got to size him up first hand….I mean it wasn’t my intent but, things led to one another. You know, that’s besides the point, he’s a damn tease!” Na’eva sat there with a goofy grin, “Um, what the fuck sis?! TELL ME EVERYTHING.” The girls slipped into their respective gowns, “So you sat on his damn lap?” Ameerah turned sideways checking her reflection, “Yeah, that was the only way to win!” She said very matter of factly. “Poor mother Katherine, what kind of daughter is she inheriting?” Na’eva said flattening a crease in her dress. “She should be worried about her son, I believe he would have consumed me right then and there; servants be damned.” Na’eva smirked at that, “I still don’t see the problem?” She hated to admit it but, it sounded like a current problem of hers.

The evening came quickly. The boys chatted about the events to come, “All set, right?” jooheon asked. Kihyun adjusted his jacket; “Of course. I asked for a little help but, it was mostly me. My neck should survive our next encounter.” Jooheon shook his head, “Well, deep down I want to say that is the saddest thing that I’ve ever heard BUT, I’m mostly proud. Look at you, doing man stuff.” Kihyun scoffed, he knew he needed to mend any possible damage from earlier that day. He dared not speak that he was actually nervous; his ears always gave him away. “Let’s go, we don’t want to keep them waiting.” Kihyun took another deep breath and followed his cousin up the marble staircase.

Ameerah rubbed her newest cub’s round little belly, Nova was purring contentedly on her lap. She was such a precious little spirit, her paws were too damn soft. “Laila, has the castle been treating you well?” The big cat unfurled with a yawn onto its side, a lazy chirp left her. “Should I take that as an yes, my lovely lazy bones?” A knock sounded interrupting her, “Yes?” She spoke. “Princess, I’ve come to escort you to dinner.” Ameerah’s mouth went dry, was he really coming to fetch her for dinner? Her servants generally would do that. “Of course, you may enter.” Ameerah placed Nova onto the chaise’s cushion when, the door opened. “Wow, what a lovely sight you are.”

Jooheon said still holding onto the door knob. Ameerah brushed her gown to eliminate any possible creases. “My lord, you spoil me with your words; many thanks. Might I add, you look more handsome as the day passes.” She said stepping towards him. His cheeky grin was back, I t was the combination of her words and gown. She was rather bold in all aspects it would seem, a trait Jooheon was becoming more attracted to by the minute. “I think we compliment each other well princess, thank you.” Jooheon took in her silhouette, the silk outlined her in a mouth watering way. “See something you like, Sire?” She said with the same tone that became her on the boat. “Indeed, I’m curious about these; may I?” Ameerah breathed in his scent, it was different from earlier; it was soft but dark? When did he get this close, she thought? “Sure,” she answered before she realized what he was even talking about. His fingertips grazed over her hip, “I’ve never seen a piercing here before.” Ameerah silenced a shiver that was fighting to run rampant, “Ah, yes. I actually have two.” She grabbed his other hand and placed it on her hip, “See? You feel this one too?” Joohenon just nodded and enjoyed the quietness that sat between them, he unconsciously rubbed his thumbs into both of her dermal piercings. His cock was was turning him into a barbarian, all he could think of was slipping his hands underneath her dress’s slit. “Interesting, what made you choose these?” Ameerah smiled sheepishly, “My mother, she had the same piercings too.” Jooheon smiled, “Well someone is a softie.” The two laughed but didn’t move, the comfort that came from him holding her was addicting already. “Well, I believe if we don’t head down now, mother will send a search party after us.” Jooheon removed his hands but extended his elbow. Ameerah happily took it, she was excited for their first evening together.

“Highness, it’s lord Kihyun.” Na’eva sighed, what could he possibly want now? She almost didn’t respond but, she knew the servants would have something to gossip about if not. “A moment please!” Na’eva quickly adjusted her curls and straightened her back. “Enter.”

A servant opened the door with their head bowed. Kihyun stepped through looking even more delicious than before. I blinked trying to take in his appearance. His hair was swept back and his jawline looked as if it could cut. His dark eyes held mine as he walked in. “Good evening princess, I’ve come to walk you to dinner.” Na’eva wanted to roll her eyes, she could do that her damn self. Her resolve weakened as he spoke next with a smile, “I’m well aware that you don’t need me for that but, I’d like to redeem myself. I’m not the greatest with words but, hopefully my actions will speak much louder.” Kihyun looked almost shy, his ears were bright red. “I would like that very much.” Na’eva extended her hand and he took it.

The dinner table was grand, it really reminded the girls of back home. The table was filled with lots of familiar dishes, there was quite literally something for everyone. The giant navy velvet cushions were welcoming, along with the current guests seated. The chandeliers casted the room in comfortable glow. Ameerah and Jooheon entered the dining hall and the room fell silent. The attendees stood and bowed as the couple found their seats at the head of the table. Jooheon pulled the chair out for his queen. “Thank you,” Ameerah said adjusting her gown one final time before sitting. “You look stunning,” Katherine stated from across the table. Jooheon gave his mother a kiss on the cheek, “Doesn’t she mother?” Ameerah giggled, “Well, you’re certainly too kind. I hope all the wedding plans haven’t stressed you too much?” Ameerah spoke to Katherine. “Not in the slightest, I’ve been planning for this since many years ago. If anything, I believe I’m more excited than you two. It’s a mother’s pride and joy watching a child grow and marry.” Ameerha went to speak when the chair next to her moved. Kihyun was pulling the chair back for her sister to sit. “Nice of you to show up,” Jooheon said behind the brim of his glass. Once Kihyun was seated the conversation flowed effortlessly, the warmth amongst the household was very evident. Ameerah felt as though she could get used to this- not to mention the spread was delicious. “I’ll be sure to tell Ms. May how delicious this is,” Ameerah said preparing for another bite.

Dinner was promptly coming to a close when a servant nodded to both Jooheon and Kihyun. “Well mother, thank you for supper. The dining hall looks amazing, I can only imagine how everything will look tomorrow.” Jooheon guided Ameerah from her chair. “Pardon us, we’ll be having our dessert out here. The giant French doors were already open with sheer drapes fluttering in the evening’s wind. Jooheon escorted his fiancé onto the balcony and an gasp left her lips. “You did all of this? For me?” Na’eva and Kihyun smiled at the happy couple unconsciously. “I suppose that’s my queue, would you care for dessert outside as well? I’ve had a table prepared, that’s of course if you feel comfortable, princess.” Na’eva thought it over, the sourness of the day leaving her minute by minute. A part of her warred, would she be foolish and put herself in another volatile situation deliberately? Or, would she give this handsome man a second chance? Oddly enough his demeanor looked rather nervous….she hated to admit it but, his puppy eyes were working. “I would like that.” The smile Kihyun gave was radiant and it caused Na’eva to return it tenfold.

“This is gorgeous, you really outdid yourself Jooheon.” Ameerah took in all of the candlelight and delicious sweet options before her.

The sun had set not too long ago, casting the sky in a pretty shade. It was indeed wondrous how the sky was blanketing the two just right. “Who would have thought, you’re quite the romantic?” Jooheon smirked while rubbing his chin. “Let’s not tell the rest of the castle, I have a rep for being a bad boy.” The two shared a laugh. “Well, I’m certain the servants are well aware of this hidden weapon of yours.” He tilted his head, “Weapon?” Ameerah smirked, mhmmm; I see how the female servants ogle you.” Jooheon paused at her revaluation, “Is that jealously I hear, Queen?” His eyes starred into hers playfully, “Somehow, I think you would like that.” She said turning towards the scenery just beyond the balcony railing. “Pardon my bluntness but, I haven’t the slightest doubt that I’ve captured your eyes, you could’ve burnt a hole in my dress if you simply willed it so. Besides, I’ll soon hold your name and acquire your heart.” Ameerah walked to Jooheon and traced the ‘V’ of his blouse, “Just think, you have yet to even hold all of me. You can rest assured, wandering eyes are no threat to me.” Her hand cupped his chin gently. A lady may play well with others but, a woman knows how to keep her toys from becoming dull, Understood?” She said placing a soft kiss to his lips. “Yes.” Was all that he could muster, his focus was now on the growing tension within his pants. Jooheon kissed the back of her hand, “So the saying is true? That man is really that simple?” She joked. Jooheon dropped his head, all he wanted to do was take her to bed, “I fear you may be correct.” The two finally sat and began pouring wine, sweet hints of pear surrounded them. “It smells amazing, is this home gown?” Jooheon nodded as he poured his own glass. “Oh yeah, this is actually one of my creations. Believe it or not, wine making is rather relaxing; it’s one of my favorite pass-times.” Jooheon looked on excitedly as Ameerah took her first sip. “Wow, this is delicious….any other hidden talents I should know about.” Jooheon took a gingerly swig, “You’ll see first hand tomorrow evening.” Ameerah choked on the crisp liquid. “Highness!”

Nae’va followed behind Kihyun as he led them to their next destination. She was finally able to take in all of him, his shoulders sat rather tall complimented by a delectable span of neck. He was quite handsome in the day but, the way the moon was casting a shadow over his sharp side profile; Na’eva found herself starring even harder, he looked like perfection. “See something you like?” Kihyun said flashing a toothy grin. “What? N, No absolutely not. I was looking at the beading on your collar, it looks rather intricate.” She finished a little too quickly. “Ah, thank you. My mother had it made for my father when they were courting. Heh, kind of fitting for the evening, no?” He said glancing back; his eye were much different from earlier today- they seemed warm. “So, we’re courting now? Na’eva asked quickening her pace to match his. “If her highness finds it to her liking?” Na’eva smirked, “I believe it’s too soon to tell dear prince; besides, I still have no clue where you’re taking me. Atleast you’re allowing me to walk on my own…and the views are exquitie.” She said peeking over the never ending balcony. “What is that? The scent is lovely.” Na’eva asked closing her eyes and trying to place it. Kihyun stopped and looked at her, “Our table.” He said beaming from ear to ear. This was the first time he had ever done something like this….romantic. His palms were already starting to sweat.

Red and pink petals met Na’eva’s eyes as she looked down. “Roses…they’re lovely.” She said tiptoeing over the silky petals. They rounded the corner to a quaint stone gazeb; roses were cascading from the top and up it’s legs. The fact that this was tucked away in this little corner of the castle was beyond romantic. past Islet lace ran from one end of the table to the other, dessert was bountiful and the smell of fresh chocolate carried in the wind.

Shadows danced upon them both as candles surrounded the small table. “You did all of this for me?” Na’eva asked lifting a rose from the stem to her nose. Kihyun stepped closer, “Yes, it’s the least I could do. I know I’m not the greatest with words but, how I handled today was appalling. I’ll never treat you like that again, I’m sorry.” Na’eva reached for his hand, “Ki, I understand you’re under a lot of stress. I can’t imagine everything you’ve been going through; all alone at that. Listen, I’ve given your proposal some thought.. I’d be delighted to visit Peth with you.” Kihyun’s eyes widened and the first true genuine smile crossed his lips. “Under a few conditions, you’re to wine and dine me this evening.” Kihyun perked up at her request, “Oh? What else, my queen?” Na’eva plucked a a petal and rubbed it between her fingers. “You’re to fill me in on your plans with your father, if I’m to help; you’re to hear my suggestions.” Kihyun took a step closer to her, “Not even married and you’re already making demands?” Na’eva smirked, “You learn quick, maybe there’s hope for you yet, dear prince?”

[chaoscontrolstheworld]

Six Shooter - Chapter 6: The Best Remedy and My Worst Enemy

A/N: Second chapter for today. I’ll post this and go back linking everything up. 

Chapters: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16

Pairings: Analogical and Royality (not yet implemented)

Word count: 5500+

Thomas tossed his head back, fingers scraping through his hair as he raised his eyebrows. He needed to look his best for today if he were going to win over Logan. The man had been incredibly hard to find and increasingly hard to get a hold of. He’d not seen Logan around the town or in his house for a long time. His father, the elder Lilac, had assured him that today Logan would be his for the day and his alone. Checking his hair once more in the mirror he flashed his most dashing smile and grabbed his hat, putting it on as he exited the house. His eyes wandered over his untamed garden before an idea appeared in his mind. He raced inside and grabbed one of his books, surely one the scholarly hunter had not read and raced back out grabbing an arrangement of flowers and holding both gifts close to his chest. His gate squeaked loudly as he exited his property, sighing a little as he pushed it shut with his foot. Thomas pushed the Lilac gate open with his hand, tossing a smile at the window as a shadow passed across the front window. The man swallowed and took a few more steps towards the door as the wooden object opened, creaking and showing its use.

“Thomas, my boy. How are you?”, the elder Lilac asked and Thomas nodded, stepping forwards and taking the old man’s outstretched hand.

“Well, and you sir?”, Thomas asked giving the man a small smile as he shook the man’s hand.

“Please, please, none of this sir business. Just call me David, or father, whichever you prefer”, David said and Thomas smiled at the old man’s casual demeanour.

“You must call me Thomas then or son, I insist”, Thomas said and David grinned widely.

“Okay then, son. Now, about my own son…Logan”, David called and Thomas brought out the flowers and book he had brought over, showing them to David and earning him a smile.

“I thought Logan would appreciate these. Flowers, grown by my hand and one of my various books. I do not know if he already carries this particular book, but I assume he would enjoy it just the same”, Thomas said and David smiled, looking over the title of the book before nodding.

“As far as I know he hasn’t read this one yet, so you’re on your way to earning his affections my boy”, David said before turning and looking behind him. “You must excuse my boy, he can take a while to get ready. Please, do come in and make yourself at home.”

“Thank you for your kindness and hospitality”, Thomas said, following David inside and taking off his hat with a small flourish. David seemed one for theatrics and drama so Thomas would play to his strengths given the situation before him. He followed David down the hallway and into the living room, taking a moment to look around at the vast array of items and paintings in the room. He noticed that each carried the same signature in black paint, written in the bottom right corner of each piece only followed by a tiny lilac flower. No doubt the former wife of David had painted these magnificent works, he made a mental note to not bring over art, lest he insult or remind David of such tragic events.

He took his place in a grand looking, red-covered chair. The chair was soft and cushioned with embroidered pillows. Red fabric stretched evenly over a wooden frame with a plump upholstered back and soft seat. It looked almost royal in comparison to the elder Lilac’s favoured chair. A green, high-backed armchair with a golden sheen to the green fabric. Soft looking, yes, but not nearly as clean or new looking as the red chair Thomas had taken. The Lilac’s chair looked worn and old, but it was his and Thomas knew not to insult his choice of chair.

“Father, Thomas”, a voice greeted them and Thomas rose from his red-lined chair, bowing slightly as Logan watched on, a small smile marring his face as he looked from David to Thomas.

“Logan. Sit down, will you”, David said, a small forced smile sitting on his lips as he tented his hands and tilted his head to the white couch. Thomas sat back down, swallowing as he eyed the other male. The usual leather hat and coat had been replaced with a high-end looking grey waistcoat, a small pocket watch peeking out of one of the pockets. His glasses looked more expensive too, black rims gone and replaced with shiny, golden wire. His pants were clean and grey pressed to perfection and showing off a pair of clean, shiny black shoes. Thomas was stuck staring at the other man, who just shuffled a little, uncomfortable with the level of staring he was receiving. David coughed and gave his son a polite smile, happy the boy had put some effort into choosing more appropriate clothing. “It’s nice to see you in something other than your hunter gear”, David said looking at his son’s shoes and waistcoat with an approving gaze.

“Verily. Shall we?”, Logan said, standing and moving to the door, glancing back at the stupefied man he had left in the red chair. Thomas hummed before snapping out of his daze and standing, walking quickly over to Logan and holding the gifts out with a blush.

“I thought you would approve of these trinkets. May the book serve you as well as it has served me”, Thomas said, seeing David nod softly out of his peripheral vision. At least he had someone on his side when it came to courting Logan. Logan looked at the flowers and book, gently taking them and giving Thomas a small, shy smile.

“Thank you. It is a pleasure to receive such gifts”, Logan said, moving away and into the kitchen, returning a few moments later with a crystal vase and the flowers sitting in water. “Would you be so kind as to make room for this, father?”, Logan asked and David nodded, taking some pictures off the table beside him so his son could place the ornate, crystal vase on the small, wooden structure. He laid the book down next to it and walked back to Thomas, eyeing the man before disappearing back into the kitchen, returning with a basket of fresh fruit, bread, cheese and a blanket. “Shall we?”, Logan asked and Thomas nodded before holding out his hand. Logan allowed his smile to widen a little as he took Thomas’ outstretched hand gently and the two walked to the door.

“Be back by sundown”, David yelled out cheerfully and Logan rolled his eyes behind his wire-rimmed glasses, making Thomas chuckle a little.

“I can assure you, we will”, Logan called back as the door shut behind the couple and Anthony’s face appeared at the window. Thomas looked back at the boy and felt a chill crawl up his spine at the cold, icy look the boy was giving him. The traveller made a mental note never to hold Logan’s hand again until after they were off the property and Anthony could no longer see them.

The pair walked down the hill, hands clasped together gently. They reached the town centre and picked up the pace. People cooed and awed as they passed, hand in hand and blushing at the attention they were receiving. Thomas squeezed Logan’s hand a little and the scholarly man relaxed a tad, giving Thomas’ hand a small squeeze back in reassurance. As they walked small clouds of dust clung to Logan’s shoes and pants, covering the grey in a layer of ochre powder. Logan didn’t seem to notice, too shy and timid in the face of their onlookers, but Thomas did. He pulled Logan a little closer to him, shoulder bumping Logan’s a little as the man let out a small huff of air. Thomas merely smiled as they ventured towards the small patch of greenery the town held.

The Green, as many called it, was made up of five trees, a small river, green grass and mossy rocks. The clump was usually left to couples or spouses on picnics as it was ideal for such occasions. The river was crystal clear, save for when the children splashed about in it, bringing mud and dirt to the surface of the water, polluting the pristine crystal with muddy brown. The trees and grass stretched out, leaves creating a small canopy that shaded those who sat under it. Flowers sometimes bloomed close to the river, brightening the surrounding growth with purple, yellow, white and blue. The river reflected these colours tenfold, creating a shimmering masterpiece whose beauty was left to those in courting and those doing the courting. In this case, it was Thomas and Logan who took in the beauty of the green oasis.

Thomas took the blanket and let go of Logan’s hand, flattening the blanket out on the ground and ensuring that nothing unsavoury lay underneath that would cause discomfort to the other man. Once seated he extended his hand and smiled up at his partner taking pleasure in the small, shy smile the hunter offered him. Logan took Thomas’ hand and sat down next to him, admiring the surrounding foliage that kept them safe from prying eyes. The basket was set down and opened softly, food removed in silence as the trickle of the river and the calling of birds called to mind the songs of nature that lulled babes to sleep. Thomas gently uncorked a bottle of what he presumed must be red wine, pouring it gently into the two glasses packed for them. He picked his own from Logan’s hand and gave the man a small smirk.

“To our friendship and possible relationship”, he said softly, clinking the two glasses together and taking a small sip of the red concoction. He tried not to grimace at the taste, but couldn’t help it as Logan also grimaced. “I see, you don’t like red wine either.”

“It’s not one of my…favourite alcoholic beverages”, Logan said softly and Thomas chuckled a little at the man’s words. The traveller set the glass down and rubbed his hands together with a grin.

“Let’s get onto something else, shall we?”, Thomas asked and Logan nodded, grateful that he didn’t have to drink the wretched fermented liquid.

“Let’s”, Logan agreed, taking out some of the food that had been packed that morning. His family’s storehouses were large in comparison to the general grocer in town, their property held many luxurious foodstuffs. Blue cheese wrapped in muslin cloth, a jar of homemade jam, fresh fruit from the orchard, the finest of their honey packed with a piece of the comb, a small slab of fresh bread, and of course the wine they had recently drunk some of. Luxurious and high-end indeed. Thomas' eyes seemed to widen at the small array of food available and Logan pulled out the cutlery and crockery he had insisted on taking. Silver and china glistened in the sun as Logan set about cutting an apple, the skin freshly washed and the fruit grown by the creek. It was a marvellous creation, one that the elder Lilac had been happy to send along with his eldest son.

“Would you like me to cut the skin off?”, Logan asked, voice holding hesitance as he blushed from the intense stare Thomas was giving him.

“No, I’d rather not have you do too much work on my part”, Thomas said softly, reaching out and grasping Logan’s hand gently, pushing his face forward and taking a bite from the piece of apple the hunter held. The sweet juice filled his mouth and he couldn’t help but lick his lips as the clear, sugary sweetness dripped from them. “Delicious”, he said quietly and Logan smiled at the compliment.

“Thank you. Here”, Logan said, offering the rest of the apple to Thomas who took it and gave the hunter a nod of approval.

“I’d rather have you feed it to me, it tastes so much better when held by the hands that grew it. But I will eat what I have been given. Thank you for such a delicious meal”, Thomas said and Logan looked down, red clouding his cheeks at the words, but a hint of a smile was spreading across his face. “I apologise. I thought that my little joke would be amusing to you. I’m sorry if I’ve offended you.”

“No, no. I…that was somewhat sweet of you. Thank you for the compliment”, Logan said, voice a little shaky as he exhaled, cheeks tinted red like Thomas’ sun-kissed roses. Thomas allowed his eyebrows to drop. It was time to get to work.

“Well…if you don’t mind. Would you…feed them to me?”, Thomas asked, voice sounding soft and shy as he looked down at the apple slices in front of him.

“I…only if you want me to”, Logan murmured lowly and Thomas turned to him, holding the plate in both hands and offering a slice to Logan, who took it and held it between two of his fingers. The juice dripped down the slim, pale digits, glinting in the sun intensely. A piece of apple poked his lips and he opened his mouth, savouring the sweet sensation and the crisp texture. He munched on the bite as Logan pulled the piece away, face a little red still but dying down in the light of the moment.

“Logan”, Thomas said, standing and brushing off his pants, turning to look at his soon to be fiancé. Logan looked up at him, eyes bright behind the glass of his spectacles. The light that streamed through the canopy captured his eyes causing them to sparkle, brown light and bright as the sun enveloped him. The rims of his glasses were like sunlight, melting and dripping around two perfect circles of ice to act as windows to the hunter’s eyes, to his soul. It was a stupid notion, but the words and look of pure innocence made Thomas’ heartache at what he would have to do. He steeled himself and gave the man a small smile, showing off his perfectly aligned, marble white teeth. “Wait here. I need to grab something.”

Logan nodded, face a picture of confusion as Thomas walked to the river, took off his shoes and socks, rolled up his sleeves and pants and waded into the river.

“What are you doing?”, Logan asked, standing up and watching as Thomas laughed, wading out a little further and bending over. His hands disappeared under the rushing waters, white foams forming a little around his arms as he felt about in the water.

“Come here”, Thomas called out over his shoulder, stumbling a little as he righted himself. Logan sighed, but stood and walked over, taking off his own shoes and socks, rolling up his pants and shirt, finally discarding the waistcoat before wading in beside Thomas. Thomas, seeing the opportunity seized it and pushed a rock out with his foot, effectively causing Logan to stumble and lose his balance. Thomas caught his falling body and Logan looked up sheepishly.

“You really should stop falling for me”, Thomas chuckled and Logan blushed at the awful joke. He righted himself and stood, promptly smiling as Thomas chuckled, the water rushing around their calves in a cool motion, successfully cooling the duo down in the hot desert heat.

“What did you want?”, Logan asked, a smile blooming on his face and making his lips tweak upwards. Thomas smirked a little and pulled out two rocks from his pockets. The rocks were a pale cream in colour and a little larger than Logan’s thumbnail. Smooth and flat, but rough around the edges like most rocks are.

“I thought…if you’re okay with it we could keep these, in memory of our first afternoon alone together”, Thomas said, passing the rock to Logan. The hunter studied it before smiling and pressing the rock to his chest.

“I’ll treasure it”, he said softly and Thomas smile at him, pocketing the other rock with a smirk. What an idiot this hunter was. Falling for something like this. Something so simple and yet…yet…Thomas’ smirk faded, cold dread and realisation filling his stomach. How could he go through with his plan now? This man was too innocent, too unsettlingly pure. It wouldn’t be right. It wouldn’t feel right, but he wanted that land. He needed that land.

Logan retrieved his shoes from the bank of the river, turning back and giving Thomas a small smile as the light glimmered behind him, the shadow of the tree’s leaves dancing across his face in delicate patterns. It was as if a painter had stepped forward and created a masterpiece right in front of Thomas. Thomas resigned himself and gave the man a smile. Logan smiled a little wider and turned heading back to the picnic basket and set up. The traveller swallowed softly as his throat constricted, closing over as fear and dread welled up, cold bubbling feelings that chilled him to the bone. He moved his legs, stepping onto the bank and watching as Logan busied himself with taking something from the basket, light dancing across the rims of his glasses as the golden rays filtered into his brown locks. Thomas almost groaned. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t hurt this man.

“Thomas, would you like some cheese, or perhaps some bread and jam”, Logan offered and Thomas bit his lip as his mind began to play tug-of-war with his emotions and heart. He sat down on the blanket and uttered a small thank you to Logan as the man handed him some bread, jam smeared on lightly. The hot fluffy bread contrasted with the sweet jam as the smell of flour and raspberries filled his mind with thoughts of early mornings.

“This is really good”, Thomas murmured softly, taking another bite while Logan simply smiled at him.

“Thank you. The bread was made by Anthony, but I refused to allow him to endanger himself with the process of making the jam”, Logan murmured back, taking a bite of his own bread and slipping the lid of the jar tightly onto the glass container. Thomas almost sighed as he looked at Logan, brown eyes meeting glass covered ones as the two shared a silent conversation, eyes alight with small fires of passion. With a rather loud sigh, Thomas flopped down onto the ground, head hitting the blanket before he turned onto his side and cradled his head with one hand. Logan pushed his legs out and didn’t stop the traveller from moving closer until the soft brown hair and hand landed on Logan’s lap. The hunter didn’t protest these actions as Thomas turned over and closed his eyes, closed eyes facing the sky above as the light filtered through the leaves above them.

The world dimmed as the sun rolled behind the clouds, golden shadow lighting the fluffy objects before it became one with the hills, fading but continuing to cast its glow over the sleepy town. Logan was lost in thought, eyes on the river not five feet away, bubbling and murmuring as it flowed crystal clear, tinted gold from the setting sun. Thomas opened his eyes and looked up at the leaves.

“We’d better get going”, Thomas murmured, sitting up from his position where his head had been cradled in Logan’s lap and the man had thumbed his hair absentmindedly. Logan seemed to fade back into reality, slowly realising how late it had gotten and how much his father would love that he’d spent the day with Thomas…alone. Oh, David would love this.

“Thank you, for such a wonderful afternoon”, Logan murmured as he packed up the food, Thomas folded the blanket silently and looked at the hunter with a smile on his face.

“It was nothing. I…I just like spending time with you”, Thomas said with a small smile, making the hunter blush a little and smile at the traveller’s words.

“Well…thank you…for that…for spending time with me”, Logan said softly, giving Thomas a shy smile as the traveller handed him the blanket and the two stood. They walked back to the town in silence, save for the birds calling and the sound of rocks colliding under their feet. The town was relatively empty apart from a few drunk people and the occasional couple en route home. They were halfway up the hill when the sun completely set, leaving only the glow over the tops of the hills to illuminate the town below. The golden light leaked in a steady path over the hills, capturing the town and the tops of the houses in all their glory. Halfway up the hill, Thomas captured Logan’s hand in his own soft embrace, causing the hunter to give him a small, shy smile. When they reached the point where the road met their respective homes they turned to each other, looked into the soft brown of the man before them and let their hands drop. “Thank you…for staying with me”, Logan murmured, running a hand through his hair a little before the hand was taken from him and into Thomas’ hands. The traveller clasped his hands over Logan’s before leaning down and placing the lightest of kisses on the flesh of the other man.

“It was my honour and pleasure to spent the day with such a wonderful companion”, Thomas said with a smile, letting Logan’s hand go and winking before turning and opening his gate. The gate creaked a little, rust flaking off as white, chipped paint blew into the wind under the traveller’s hand. Thomas straightened and turned to Logan once more. “I hope to see you again soon. Perhaps…my house, tomorrow for lunch?”, Thomas offered and Logan chuckled a little.

“I’ll think about it”, the hunter said with a smile before opening his own gate and closing it behind him, the door opening as his brother raced out and into the elder Lilac’s waiting arms. Anthony glared at Thomas over his older brother’s shoulder. Thomas gave the boy a tight looking smile before turning and entering his house, the door shutting softly behind him as he tossed his coat and hat onto the chest of drawers, the small figurine moving a little as the fan rattled at the drawer’s movement. Thomas almost swore when the small figurine toppled over and rolled onto its side. He ran to it and looked the porcelain over as his mind conjured up swear after swear, berating himself for being so careless. Gentle fingers picked the figure up and wide brown eyes looked it over. Pale digits ran the length of the unchipped white surface, dancing across the painted hair and glasses with practised ease. Thomas let out a sigh as he closed his eyes, opening them once more to look at the figure. It looked like Logan, yet the figure itself was of someone else entirely.

Thomas set the figure back in its place and walked into the living room with heavy feet. He practically fell into his favourite chair, looking sideways at the large window that showed him the rest of the world. A figure moved in the Lilac house and Thomas narrowed his eyes as the figure came into better focus. Logan moved swiftly, taking a book from beside a vase of flowers. The book Thomas had given him. He opened the book, smiling a little at the forewords before taking a seat in the red chair Thomas had taken only this morning. He relaxed back into the red, seemingly enraptured with the book. The scene made Thomas smile, but as his eyes wandered from the hunter to the figurine he made up his mind. The hunter had to go.

Roman growled softly as Patton pushed another glass of water his way. The bartender was refusing to serve him anything alcoholic at present and it was becoming very annoying, considering that he was probably the only patron not completely drunk. His mind wandered back to that afternoon where he’d found Logan and Thomas together in The Green. If he could find something wrong with the man he’d have been happy, but Thomas had been a perfect gentleman going so far as to act like a man out of one of Logan’s many books. It annoyed Roman to no end that the traveller could be so darn perfect all the time, but Logan liked him so there was nothing the hunter could do.

“You look down, Ro. How can I help kiddo?”, Patton asked, eyeing the hunter as he stepped up to the bar, glass and cleaning rag in hand. His eyes wandered over the hunter’s sagging form and his heart jumped as their eyes met. Sad eyes looked into shocked and worried ones before the sadness disappeared and Roman looked at the bar, swirling a finger around the rim of his glass.

“It’d be helpful if you could find a flaw in Thomas”, Roman muttered and Patton nodded softly, licking his lips as he tried to think up anything that could help the hunter at present. He couldn’t tell the man about Virgil or Thomas’ real motive for courting Logan. He’d practically promised not to say anything and now…now here he was stuck at a crossroads unable to go the way he wanted.

“I’m sure you’ll find something”, Patton said with a soft sigh as Roman’s shoulders sagged further and he let out a pitiful grunt at the words. It took all Patton had not to say something to the man. “I’ll be right back”, Patton said softly and Roman made a noise of acknowledgement. Patton moved swiftly into the back of the bar, closing the oak door softly behind him before running his hands through his hair. How could he tell Roman and Logan that Thomas was an outlaw boss without blowing Virgil’s cover and crushing Logan’s heart? The man seemed entirely enamoured with the traveller from the way Roman had been talking about the date the two had shared in The Green. It’d break Patton’s heart to break Logan’s and that just wouldn’t do. “Stupid, stupid, stupid Patton”, the bartender murmured softly, repeating the words to himself as he gently banged his head into the wood of the door. He groaned softly as he pictured Logan’s face, stormier than the wet season with tear stained cheeks, face red from crying over the outlaw boss. He’d never be able to do it unless…unless he could convince Virgil to out Thomas. If Virgil outed Thomas then Patton wouldn’t be breaking Logan’s heart and the outlaw didn’t seem to have any real feelings for the hunters or the town so it shouldn’t bother him too much.

Patton stood, face filled with determination and heart stony as he made up his mind. He’d close the bar, for the very first time since he’d opened it, and ride out to one of the other bars. If Logan had been to one with outlaws all he had to do was ride to that one and find Virgil’s location, easy as pie. Patton whipped around with a smile on his face and left the back room of his bar, the door closing firmly behind him. Roman looked up, tilting his head in confusion.

“What’s got you so happy?”, he asked and Patton shrugged before bending down, elbows meeting the wood of the bar.

“Do you happen to have a spare coat, perchance?”

Patton shuffled a little as the heavy coat pulled him down. How could his two friends bear to wear this. It was heavy and stuffy. It smelt foul too. Like something had died in it and then the coat had been hung out in the sun for hours on end. Sweat was beginning to bead down his face, but he was more worried about his water supplies. Roman had always told him that if he ever travelled he shouldn’t drink too much, water from other towns could be contaminated or spiked with all manner of things. Logan had lent him a horse…okay, he’d borrowed it without the Lilac’s permission but if Logan found out what he was doing he’d be in so much trouble. Logan wouldn’t believe him if he told him about Thomas’ true intentions, so he needed Virgil and that should be proof enough for Logan to see reason.

The dust swirled around him as his horse carried him ever further into the wastelands of the desert. Scorching sands and water boiling heat as far as the eye could see. He’d sagged a map off Logan a day or two ago, promising to take it back one it had been studied. Logan couldn’t say no to him, so he allowed Patton the courtesy of keeping the map which was now Patton’s only guide on the harsh sun-kissed road. The map said there was supposed to be a bar only a few more miles away, but Patton couldn’t see the structure. He wouldn’t give up hope though. If Logan was willing to risk everything for the town, he’d be ready to risk it all for Logan in return.

The sun had begun to set by the time Patton saw the hill. Shaped like a raven’s head it loomed over the track, carving fear into all who laid eyes on it. In the dark and the setting sun, it looked only more imposing as the sun cast shadows under the eye ridges, black settling into crevices and making the legendary feathers appear. The horse below him jolted a little as it stumbled on a loose rock, the movement causing Patton to seize up. The raven’s head seemed to stare straight through him as he passed by it, consulting the map in the ever-darkening world around him. His horse kept moving, slower but still moving towards their goal. The pair stopped under a rock as Patton struggled to read the map; should he go left…or right? Which was the correct way to go? Patton sighed and kicked the horse into gear, coming out from under the rock and gasping at the sight above him. Starlight pierced through the heavens as the sky erupted in glittering, iridescent dots of pure white light. They shone off his glasses, pinpricks of light dancing over the glass slowly as the horse and rider passed underneath their beautiful display.

Patton smiled a little as the last hill came into view; a dog head shaped hill with pointy spikes growing up like raised ears. The bar came into sight shortly after, a warm orange glow surging out into the desert. Patton shivered and silently thanked Roman for lending him the thick coat. It was no wonder they wore them when the desert got so cold of a night.

The bartender drew his horse up to the bar, wrapping the reins around the railing and smiling as he looked at the establishment. Windows above leaked the glow of candles through closed curtains while the door held no light back, fully illuminating roughly five feet from the oak frame. Patton rubbed his nose and stepped up onto the creaky splintering stairs, narrowly avoiding a passed-out patron that had been on his way out to get his horse. The man swallowed softly and moved closer to the door frame looking inside, eyes searching for the only outlaw he really knew. Upon finding nothing among the sleeping, drunk or vulgar figures Patton took a seat at the bar and stripped off his coat, folding it messily and dropping it onto the barstool beside him.

“What can I get you, stranger?”, a voice asked and Patton looked up to see the bartender.

“Uh, waters fine. What’s your name?”, Patton asked, feeling a little uncomfortable about not being the one behind the bar.

“Talyn. And you?”, the bartender asked with a polite smile, grabbing a glass and filling it with water, handing it off to the tired man.

“Patton. Nice to meet you Talyn”, he said with a smile and Talyn smiled back.

“What’re you doing this far out? You’re not a...hunter, are you?”, Talyn asked, moving their face close to Patton’s and whispering the words. Patton choked on his water, setting the glass down and coughing into his hand.

“Good heavens, no. I…I could never be a hunter”, Patton said with a small sigh, the soft sound ringing out through the bar as a snore became more present.

“Well, what are you doing here? Looking for someone?”, Talyn asked and Patton nodded at the other bartender.

“I’m looking for a friend of mine. He goes by the name Virgil”, Patton said and Talyn nodded, a sly smile slipping onto their face.

“You’re one of his friends, are you. Well, any friend of Virge’s is a friend of mine”, Talyn said, sitting down opposite Patton and holding out their own glass, the two crystalline containers clinking together softly.

“I…I’ve only known Virgil for a few weeks now and he hasn’t been back to town for a while now. I’m honestly a little worried and…and I need his help with something”, Patton said softly. Talyn nodded in understanding their glass hitting the bar softly.

“Well, you should try Joan’s bar. Not too far away. I can take you there in the morning if you’d like”, Talyn said and Patton smiled at them gratefully.

“That’d be appreciated, thank you”, Patton said before downing the rest of his water.

“Stay upstairs tonight, patrons can get rowdy at night. You might want to lock your door”, Talyn suggested and Patton nodded.

“Yeah, I know what that’s like. I’m a bartender too…in Akers town. Come by and visit when you can”, Patton said happily as he made his way up the rickety stairs and to the door.

“Will do”, Talyn called after him as he shut the door and made his way to the first single room. He collapsed in the room, asleep before his head hit the mattress.

Acknowledgements/Thank you to: @xxtearfulchildxx (@lowkeysalient ) and @sea-blue-child

Asks, notes and messages: all are accepted if you wish to ask to be added to the tag list. 

[magicalthoughtsendinterriblefics]

Regression - Request

Requested by anon: Sherlock x reader. Readers ex boyfriend used to shout at her before he used to beat her. Sherlock never shouts when she's around as he knows it scars her. One day Sherlock and Mycroft are having an argument Sherlock is staying calm but Mycroft starts shouting. Causing reader to drop a heavy glass dish before running out the door and into the rain & anon: Sherlock x reader. The reader was in an abusive in the past. Now happy with Sherlock but doesn't like shouting. Mycroft comes in asking Sherlock to come to dinner with mummy. Mycroft and Sherlock start arguing. Sherlock is staying calm but Mycroft is shouting causing reader to shake in fear.

Pairing: Sherlock x reader

Word count: 1,750

Warnings: Abusive-ex, post-traumatic stress disorder’s regression, triggering.

A/N: Another abusive-ex related fic... I’ll say it again, if any of you is in a similar situation please, please, please, get help. Leave, break that sh*t up, do whatever it takes to go back to a normal life (unless it risks your life, then look for alternatives like calling the cops). I’ve experienced violence first-handedly and I can tell you that there is ALWAYS a way. Don’t let yourself down. You are worthy enough to get a real relationship without violence, abuse, humilliation, etc. YOU ARE WORTH IT.

Enjoy!

Road trips weren’t Sherlock’s favourite kinds of journeys, especially when the destiny was his parents’ house. Yet, he remained calm, finding all sorts of excuse to encourage the on-going conversation between him and (Y/N) to continue until their arrival.

It had been Mycroft’s idea to spend the Christmas Break at their parent’s house. Obviously, Sherlock was a bit reluctant about it, but (Y/N) convinced him to spend time with his family. He agreed as long as she went there with him – which was perfectly accepted by the rest of the Holmes – and so there were.

They arrived a tad bit late, when the moon had just risen over the green hills that framed the petite picture of the small British house Mr. and Mrs. Holmes lived at. In spite of the time, they were received by the cheerful couple and Mycroft, who was just as serious as usual.

After a long dinner, they went to bed. As far as they could tell, that that Christmas would be pacific between the two brothers. Sherlock hadn’t been shot then, and Mycroft was free from his work, so Mrs. Holmes and (Y/N) hoped that they weren’t stressed enough to start an argument over nothing.

The first two days were fine. Mycroft and Sherlock would bombard each other with snazzy comments, but that was it. Mrs. Holmes was more than happy to have her two boys at home without arguing.

“I think he is behaving because of you.” She confessed once to (Y/N), while they baked together.

“I’m sure it’s only because he has matured.” (Y/N) replied, unable to take the credit from something Sherlock had worked so hard for.

“So humble…” Mrs. Holmes awed, “Whatever you say, dear, but I’m sure he does it for you. Sherlock has never been able to feel completely related to someone like he does with you; I’m sure he wants to impress you.”

(Y/N) didn’t reply, she only blushed and continued her job.

The boys were out, smoking in secret and discussing somethings about a case Mycroft needed Sherlock to work in. For some reason other than Sherlock’s need to piss Mycroft off, the detective wasn’t accepting and that got Mycroft to his nerves.

Ten minutes after Mrs. Holmes and (Y/N) finished baking, the argument rose. It was impossible to run away from it, apparently. They could hear the heated discussion at the other side of the door. Sherlock was chill, not raising his voice more than necessary and Mycroft was trying his best to do the same.

Mrs. Holmes figured the ginger bread cookies they had baked would do to distract them and so they took them out, placed them in big crystal containers and walked to the living room where Sherlock and Mycroft were.

Mycroft was standing in front of Sherlock, who was comfortably sitting at one of the sofas. The look on the detective’s face was more than enough to tell the reason why Mycroft was so upset. It was cocky, showing how satisfied Sherlock was with himself, and even sassy.

“This is life or death, Sherlock.” Mycroft insisted, “I’m sure there’s nothing more important than that.”

“There is… Many things, in fact.” Sherlock snapped, “Trust me, I died for two years.” A cynical wink and then Sherlock turned to meet (Y/N)’s eyes. “Ah, my lovely (Y/N).”

She smiled shyly and placed the cookies at the coffee table by his side. “Your mother thinks these will calm you two.”

“I’m sure it makes sense in that funny little brains of her.” Sherlock and Mycroft spoke in unison. (Y/N) giggled and took the other plate from Mrs. Holmes hands.

The argument continued for a bit more. Sherlock and Mrs. Holmes devoured the cookies while Mycroft exposed the many reasons as to why Sherlock should join him in that particular case, getting more and more frustrated with each negative Sherlock gave him.

“What could be more important than this?!” Mycroft exclaimed, and (Y/N) tensed instantly. Sherlock gave her a calming nod and before answering.

“Many things, some of which I’m afraid I can’t tell you right now.” Sherlock explained. (Y/N) sensed the danger ahead and stood up, taking one of the empty crystal plates in order to take it back to the kitchen.

“YOU.” Mycroft roared, “YOU ARE SUCH A CHILD! CAN’T YOU SEE THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THATN ANY OTHER CLUMSY THING YOU HAVE IN MIND?!”

“Mycroft.” Sherlock begged, getting up from his seat to try and calm his brother down before (Y/N) got triggered.

But it was too late.

The loud shouting, the impact of his calloused hands against her soft skin, the pain, the humiliation, the fear… It was all coming back to her like a wave of forgotten memories, willing to drown her in her past. She was scared again, afraid that he might come back after all. She feared that she hadn’t fully escaped him, that he would be just around the corner or behind the door. The things she had decided to forget were rising up again.

The crystal plate fell from her hands, and the sound of it dragged (Y/N) back to reality. However, her instincts were still trapped in the past and so she did what she had learned: Run.

It was raining outside, just like the night she escaped him for once and for all. She remembered leaving all of her stuff there, except for her wallet which contained a few pounds and a credit card, nothing else. But being poor and homeless was a lot better than living with him for another day.

-

“What just happened?” Mycroft asked with full concern.

“You triggered her, that’s what happened.” Sherlock hissed, jumping over the crystals to go after her.

“Trigger her?” Mrs. Holmes inquired.

“Yes!” Sherlock fumed, “In this case, Mycroft got her back to an awful time in the past with her abusive ex.”

And with that, Sherlock left the house. She had run too fast, and too far away, and because of the rain it was hard to see, but Sherlock needed to find her and calm her down. He knew what loud shouting caused, he knew all about the awful man that had destroyed her.

-

She felt like she was there once more, running away, praying that he didn’t chase after her. Her shoes got stuck in the mud, and eventually she had gotten rid of them. Her hair was falling in wet strands over her eyes, but that didn’t stop her. She needed to find the street, or another house to find people that could help her…

A pair of big arms held her out of a sudden. A loud scream left her lips, but Sherlock didn’t flinch. He held her tightly, trying to get her to look into his eyes, past the tears. He needed to help her calm down.

“It’s me.” He cried, “It’s me, I won’t hurt you.”

“Sherlock!” She whined. Sherlock’s hands were cupping her cheeks, and so she placed her own cold hands over his, trying to get back to reality through his warmth.

“I’m here, you’re safe.” He said, “Please, calm down.”

“I… I was there, Sherlock.” She muttered.

“No, it was just a regression. People with post-traumatic stress disorder tend to suffer from them.” He explained, “But I’m here. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

The tears streamed down her face. She knew she was safe, yet the fear of suddenly going back was still palpable and it was taking the best of her not to faint. Her heart was beating too fast, and she was dizzy. She was sweating, and she was trembling. The anxiety she was feeling couldn’t be easily calmed by Sherlock’s warm embrace, yet he was trying his best.

He let go off her cheeks and instantly wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulling her closer to his chest. His hands travelled to her hair, and he stroked it softly as he whispered sweet nothings into her ear as an attempt to calm her down.

“We can go home if you want.” He spoke, “John is out with Mary’s family, and Mrs. Hudson went to visit her sister. It will be just you and me, alone and safe.”

“I forgot we are at your parents’ house.” She mumbled.

“Technically, we are at their front yard…” Sherlock corrected.

“They will hate me for this, won’t they?” She asked sadly.

“I highly doubt it.” Sherlock replied as he saw his parents and brother walking their way to them with umbrellas and rain boots. Mrs. Holmes had an extra umbrella for them and towels.

(Y/N) was still shivering in Sherlock’s arms, and he wasn’t moving. His grip was tight, and his breath was steady. He would not let her go until she was better, no matter how uncomfortable it could be to stay under the rain for a bit longer.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, not knowing the rest of the Holmes family members were there.

“You’re not the one who should be sorry.”  Sherlock replied, giving his older brother a stern glare.

“I’m very sorry, (Y/N).” Mycroft spoke and (Y/N) tensed, which made Sherlock hold her tighter. “I had no idea about… That.”

“She forgives you.” Sherlock answered for her, “Now could you please leave us alone?”

(Y/N) shook her head and pulled slightly away, drying her tears before turning around. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess.” She apologized to her family-in-law.

Mrs. Holmes gave her a warm smile and hugged her instantly. “Now I know why Sherlock is so calm… You naughty girl, lying to me and saying it wasn’t because of you.” She said and (Y/N) giggled.

“You’re safe here, (Y/N).” Mr. Holmes promised, “None of us will let anything happen to you.”

“Thank you.” She said.

“I won’t ever raise my voice in front of you, which is a promise.” Mycroft spoke chivalrously, “I am a man of my word.”

“Good.” Sherlock rushed. He hated when (Y/N) didn’t pay attention to him. “Can we go back and have dinner? I’m sure (Y/N) would love some tea.”

“Of course, son.” Mr. Holmes said, chuckling at his youngest’ behaviour.

The whole family went back inside. Sherlock and (Y/N) had to change before sitting to drink tea by the fire place. The Holmes turned out to be really comprehensive people, and so none of them judged her for reacting the way she did. Mrs. Holmes even forgot about the broken crystal plate, saying that material stuff comes and goes, but the family stays forever.

Masterlist.

Sherlock Tags: @resurrection-huntress @oaisara @charlottemalfoy @zena-dukmak @just-a-blog00 @wefracturedmotivation @beccamullz @newts-fan-case @sugarshai @vancepter @roseyhxnt @thisisjessicatalking @foureyedsiopao @nicole-pierce @captain-sherlockomg @kissed-by-white-wolf @samanthasmileys @love-charmer-sketch @givemeamemoryicanuse @diesintheshower @demonminnion3 @thatmoodindigo @sexyporntime

[shirohibiki]

well, folks, here it is. a month late and ~18600 words, my new record for longest fic to date. i’m sorry it’s so crazily long and crappy like everything else and i’m REALLY sorry it took so long, but… i hope y’all like it anyway, lmao i spent an UNGODLY fucking amount of time slaving over this. note: there are some explanations that are repeated because this is technically a standalone fic so it’s there for those who don’t read the others, but i’m actually putting some things in a loose timeline of sorts now. not all fics are in it or may not be listed, just the major stuff i guess idk

written for my spongebob human AU, timeline: [1] | [2] | [3]

spongebob is hosting one of his famous christmas parties, and sandy hatches an evil scheme: get spongebob drunk and encourage him to go kiss squidward under some mistletoe, in an effort to perhaps jump-start some progress in their relationship. she persuades him easily, and one totally smashed spongebob goes to give squidward the wildest smooch of his life. this causes all sorts of Feelings within squidward, but before he has the chance to confront spongebob about it, it’s apparent the next morning that spongebob has entirely forgotten the affair. squidward definitely isn’t going to remind him, and nobody else does either, so he must suffer in silence and try to deal with all of these foreign emotions.

merry belated christmas, everyone. i love all of you so much. <3 this is my gift to the beautiful squidbob community; thank you for being such a bright spot in my life!

Once Spongebob learned how to properly host parties, a Spongebob party was the best party in town.

This Christmas party was no different – and it was only the first one of the month! For every weekend in December, up to and including Christmas itself, he threw a festive shindig.

He’d gone all-out, as per usual fashion – the entire pineapple was decorated inside and out, chock full of jolly holiday cheer. Wreaths, garland, ribbons, lights, mistletoe, stockings, ornaments, candy canes, snowglobes – you name it, he had it. On the front of his snow-covered pineapple hung an inviting banner that read, ‘Mele Kalikimaka!’ A herd of glowing reindeer lounged about in the front yard, accompanied by a snowman family. His Christmas tree was stunning – he’d picked out the biggest coral tree he could find and made sure it was perfect in every way, with every ornament hung with care and every strand of lights threaded with precision. His fireplace roared welcomingly, providing an incredibly cozy heat for people to snuggle by. Glistening multicolored lights and garland were run along the walls of every room with red bows accentuating them. Countless other decorations adorned his household which inspired great holiday spirit for all. The banquet provided was nothing to sneeze at, either. His grandmother and Squidward’s mother both baked their famous cookies, and combined with the other various desserts, those sweets were a force to be reckoned with. Spongebob home-cooked a lot of the meals; the ham, the turkey, the kielbasa, the bean salad, the roasted vegetables, the mashed potatoes, the baked ziti, and so much more… The pepperoni bread was from a nearby Italian joint, but it was a must-have. His parents often came to help him, along with Sandy – Patrick was banned from the kitchen. As in he wasn’t even allowed to be in the same house while they cooked. If nothing else, Spongebob was a perfectionist. That meant every spread, like the rest of his house, looked like it was straight out of a Christmas magazine with how neat and ornate it was… Until people started eating, of course!

Spongebob loved Christmas. Ever since Sandy told him all about it that fateful day… And the day he met the real Santa Claus… It had easily become his favorite holiday. He adored everything about it! The shopping, the decorating, the snow aplenty! The gifts, the love in the air, the chestnuts roasting! The mistletoe~… Oh, Christmas… It was the most wonderful time of the year indeed.

By 5 PM, almost everyone had arrived and the party got underway. Joyful holiday music and the sound of chatter filled the well-lit rooms while the host flitted about, checking on everyone just to make sure they were having the Best Party Ever™. The very picture of adorability, Spongebob wore a beautifully gaudy reindeer themed ugly sweater that hung off the shoulder, a headband with reindeer antlers, and tight black slacks. Along with his rosy freckled cheeks, captivating cerulean eyes, fluffy flaxen hair and gap-toothed smile, he dazzled all of the partygoers. Since things had now settled down, he was finally able to go relax for a moment. He trotted over to a table and sighed in relief as he seated himself. “Oh boy…” Being host sure could be tiring! He loved it, though. Everyone looked so great in their sweaters and button-downs and dresses, and they were all enjoying themselves.

Blue eyes roved around the crowded room – where was… Ah. There he was. Squidward was sitting on a couch across the room, appearing to be quite a bit less grumpy than he usually did, sporting a charming ugly sweater like always. It was snowman themed this time! He was actually talking to someone, too! It was so nice to see him having a good time… Spongebob sighed again, more wistfully this time, propping his arm up on the table and resting his cheek in his palm. Gee… What he wouldn’t give to be sitting in his lap with one of Squidward’s arms around his waist. That’d be swell. If it were possible, he managed to become even more romantically charged than he already was around holidays like Christmas or Valentine’s. It was just – it looked so nice for couples, with the hugging and the kissing and the scarf-sharing and the cuddling by the fire and the…

Gosh… It’d be real swell.

“Howdy, Spongebob!” A familiar voice pulled him from his melancholy-tinged thoughts. One Sandra Cheeks had approached him – he smiled up at her.

“Hiya, Sandy.”

“Takin’ a break? Neptune knows you deserve one!” She said, clapping him on the back as she pulled up a chair next to him.

“Hehe. Naw, I’m okay. I don’t mind the work!” She looked gorgeous tonight too, which came as no surprise. Makeup wasn’t something she wore too often, but tonight, she’d used some glittery gold eyeshadow with a deep plum lipstick and it was absolutely incredible on her. He could also see that she was wearing a wonderful ugly turtleneck sweater under her aquatic suit – such a shame she couldn’t take that dang old thing off. It was always so in the way. Curse their differences in oxygen intake. She had her thick brown curls pulled into pigtails like usual and a pretty burgundy bow on her tail that even lit up! And boy, that fur was fluffy today! “Ooh, I see you took extra care to fluff up your tail today!” He complimented, reaching over to pet through the soft pelt, marveling at it. Sandy chuckled.

“Yup! I brushed it for ten whole minutes! Gettin’ the bow perfect was kind of a challenge, but I managed it!”

“You sure did!” They shared a laugh before Sandy silently observed him for a moment or two. His expression had fallen – he seemed a tad distant, and, looking down, she spotted him continually squeezing some of the fabric of the hem of his sweater. Occasionally, his grip flexed so hard his knuckles went white.

“So, Sponge… Feelin’ kinda lonely, are ya? You’ve been quiet tonight.”

“Wh—“ He whipped around to gape at her. Jeez, she was way too astute! “I… No, I’m fine! I’m just really happy that everyone’s here, and that they’re all loving my party.” She tapped her fingers against her helmet thoughtfully, glancing to Squidward. Soon, a grin spread across her face.

“Maaaaybe y’all should go talk to ‘im.”

“I will in a bit, when he’s not busy.” Spongebob shifted uncomfortably, averting his gaze. The cloth he’d been toying with was now clutched in a firm, unforgiving hold.

“You suuuuuure put up a lotta mistletoe.” Sandy was ruthless in her attempts. She could tell Spongebob was sort of upset – not to mention anxious – and wanted to urge him to at least go and be near Squidward to put him more at ease. To her amusement, he flushed.

“Wh—it’s just decoration! I mean, I definitely encourage kissing for anyone who wants to, though.” Spongebob was a lover of romance, through and through. At that moment, an idea wormed its way into Sandy’s head. That grin of hers turned a shade more devilish, but to her best friend’s surprise, she relented, rising from her seat.

“I’m gonna get you a drink, okay? Wait right here, don’t you dare go on gettin’ up. There are others people can go to if they need somethin’.” She wagged a finger at him scoldingly. He pouted, but didn’t bother to argue because he knew he wouldn’t win that one.

Passing by numerous talkative revelers, Sandy skipped gleefully over to the beverage table in the kitchen. It was time to liven up this party. Larry, who was chilling out nearby, greeted her. He wore an ugly sweater too – but his was sleeveless. Had to show off those guns somehow!

“Hey, Sandy! How’s it hangin’?”

“Great! Just gettin’ our hard-workin’ lil’ Sponge a drink, heh.” Larry had been taking a sip of his water, but paused with the cup to his lips upon hearing her tone. His eyes narrowed suspiciously. He saw her reach for the cranberry juice from behind the fountain of punch.

“… Yeah? What’re you getting him?” The pineapple juice was next. Oh no, he knew what she was up to… She was so obvious about it too! She didn’t even bother to hide her smile!

“A Sponge’s lil’ helper~.” Sandy’s expression went downright sinister then. The vodka was next to be added to her beautiful cocktail. Hopefully there were cherries or limes around! Frowning, Larry stepped forward.

“Whoa, hey there, now wait a sec. What are you planning? We all know he loves baybreezes, but somehow, I don’t think he was the one who asked for it.” He had a very strong suspicion. It was confirmed by her cackling maniacally.

“HA! I think he needs to loosen up a bit! He gets wound up tighter than a snake ‘round a rodent it found for dinner when he hosts parties.” Larry placed his hands on his hips as she mixed it into a beautiful sunset – Spongebob’s favorite part of the drink. She was admittedly quite good at it blending the colors together.

“Loosen up, yeah. But you’re trying to get him all over Squidward. Are you sure this is a good idea? What if he does or says something he regrets?” His personal hangups with Squidward aside, he was mostly worried about Spongebob getting hurt in some way.

“P’SHAAAAWWW! He can just blame it on bein’ drunk, ain’t no thing!” Sandy’s evil laughter only continued. Her brew was now COMPLETED! The lifeguard pinched his brow.

“… Dude, it’s only 6. We can’t get him drunk this early.” She opened her mouth to speak, but went no further. Her brow creased. It would be a problem if the host passed out too early.

“… Hm. Well… Dinner’ll be served soon, right? Then he won’t need to supervise as much.” Be that as it may, he would try to regardless, knowing Spongebob. “So I mean, I don’t see why not, once all the food’s ready to go.”

“Oh boy,” Larry groaned, dragging a hand down his face. “I have a bad feeling about this.”

Sandy returned to Spongebob but instead of giving him what she’d made, told him he should probably help serve dinner first just to get it out of the way. It wasn’t like much had to be done – they just had to uncover the platters and make sure everything was warm and ready, mostly. He hadn’t even seen what she’d made him, but agreed nonetheless – his guests were of the utmost priority, they came first! Unsurprisingly, he went out of his way to make sure every single partygoer had everything they needed and that Patrick was not permitted to inhale all of the food. Frank, who was sitting at the table in the dining room, noticed him still buzzing about even after everyone had been served. “Spongebob, go eat already! We’re all fine, take a breather!” Others around him nodded in agreement. Spongebob turned, having been fussing over one of the M&M bowls.

“Wha? Uh, are you su—“ Sandy interrupted by walking right up to him and holding out his drink, beaming. It was a bit diluted now because she’d had to put in more ice to keep it cool, but she could certainly make more.

“Here. You need to sit yer butt down and spend time with us rather’n the candy dishes.”

“Yeah! We wanna talk to you, Spongebob!” Abigail agreed. “You always do this! You get so worried, but we’re all able to help ourselves, and there are other people we can go to if we need something. Just sit and hang out, okay?” Spongebob fretted a bit, feeling bad – he’d not realized he was that obsessive. He just wanted to throw a good party, so he spent a lot of time worrying and fixing things – at least in the beginning of the night. No matter what, as the party went on and fewer people needed him, he allowed himself to participate more. This time, though, they wanted him the whole party, not half of it. It wasn’t fair to him if he couldn’t have fun too.

“Gee… I’m sorry, I…” Finally regarding his beverage, he paused. His pupils dilated. A baybreeze… “It’s SO PRETTY,” he gasped, marveling at the way Sandy layered the liquids and how the glass glimmered with the reflection of the Christmas lights around them. Out of their close group of friends, she was the best at making mixed drinks. “AND A LOOPY STRAW?! WITH AN UMBRELLA AND CHERRIES?! OH, SANDY!” He pulled her into a tight hug, thrilled. Patting his back, she laughed.

“Yer welcome~! Drink up!”

“Oooh, already breaking out the alcohol, huh?” Evelyn asked, which gave Spongebob pause. Wait… Should he be drinking this early? The clock read 6:30. The party hadn’t been going on for very long… What if he drank too much and blacked out? He didn’t have a very strong constitution, and people needed him! He appeared as if he was going to protest, but he knew Sandy wouldn’t allow him to.

“… Okay, but just one!” He sat himself down at the table next to Larry, who wondered if Spongebob noticed that incredibly ominous grin on Sandy’s face.

“Drink! Drink! Drink!” Frank chanted. “You sure know how to make them, Sandy. Think you could teach me sometime? It always comes out muddled when I do it.”

“Hmm… Maybe I could host a workshop sometime, sure! It’s not too hard. Actually, Sponge, I can make another that’s real pretty like that, but has peach n’ orange juice in it! If you like yer baybreezes, you’d like this one.” He already seemed intrigued – hook, line, and sinker. He was sipping his current drink through his straw, thoroughly enjoying the mix of cranberry and pineapple. Alcohol itself wasn’t his favorite taste in the world, but he liked it with fruity things. Orange juice did sound good…

“What else is in it?”

“Like I said, pretty similar. Vodka, cranberry juice, peach schnapps, and orange juice. Or, at least, that’s one version of it. It’s all orange and red like these, but the orange is brighter.”

“Ooooh…” His eyes shone with wonder. He was such a sucker for the pretty colors, he couldn’t help it! He might have to have one now, it was so tempting… It would be fine, that was only two drinks! He didn’t even have to drink the whole thing! “What’s it called?”

Smirking, Sandy leaned forward a bit. “Sex on the Beach~.” There was a chance he wouldn’t get flustered, but… The way his countenance lit up rivaled the cranberry juice! Success! Larry tried to choke back a laugh and the others could be heard giggling. Spongebob quietly sucked his baybreeze through the straw, staring down at it, cheeks red. Unfortunately for him, whatever was swirling around in his mind eventually flustered him so much that he drained the entire glass in one go and then shouted, even redder than before,

“I WANT A SEX ON THE BEACH!” He pounded his empty glass down on the table. He wasn’t even that intoxicated – it had been fueled moreso by embarrassment. Those around him hushed for a moment before many burst into laughter. Larry couldn’t help it – oh, that was priceless! The delivery was perfect! Merely huffing, Spongebob crossed his arms. “There’s nothing funny about it! It’s just the name of a drink! Don’t be so lewd!” Sandy was chortling away as she got up to go make it for him. She’d have abs on top of her abs by the end of the night at this rate!

“Hoo doggie! Comin’ right up, Spongebob! One Sex on the Beach!” And back to the kitchen their squirrely friend ran.

“What happened to ‘just one?’” Evelyn teased, poking at his arm – this earned her another huff.

“It IS just one! It’s just one of – of a different kind! And it’s the only other one I’m having,” the blond insisted. Mr. Krabs noticed the commotion as he walked by with a plate of food in hand. Their host had already broken out the liquor? Hmm… He leaned over to whisper to Plankton, who was beside him.

“Think I should charge people fer the impendin’ Drunken Spongebob Shenanigans?”

“This is his house, Eugene,” Plankton replied flatly whilst picking a crumb off of his ugly sweater that matched Mr. Krabs’s.

“… Right, but… It’s like dinner and a show! People pay fer that!”

“In his own house, yes. If anyone could even attempt to use it for monetary gain, it would be him. Honestly, Eugene. You’re shameless.”

“Don’t you roll yer eye at me, Sheldon! Fine! I’ll just enjoy what we get to see, then.”

“Oh, Neptune. I think I’m going to need a drink…”

Sandy soon came back with another one of her beautiful concoctions. Deep orange and red, complete with a cherry, an umbrella, and a loopy straw. Everyone currently around them ‘ooh’ed and ‘ahh’ed. Spongebob squealed – it was so BEAUTIFUL! He held out his hands to take it from her, admiring at its sunset-esque gradient. Upon him taking his first sip, applause sounded.

“How’s it taste?! I might need one, Sandy!”

“Wow!! I love it!! The orange juice is so good with cranberry!” He honestly couldn’t tell if he liked pineapple and cranberry or orange and cranberry better… Both? Both. Both is good.

“That’s some good Sex on the Beach, eh, Sponge?” Sandy was out for blood tonight! Good lord! Sadly, she didn’t get the reaction she wanted – Spongebob merely nodded, contentedly drinking away.

“Mmhmm!” She knew he’d start getting tipsy quite swiftly – she’d added a biiiit more vodka than the recipe called for since the orange juice helped in masking it. She also wondered if she could get him to try another…

“I’ll make a round of drinks for y’all, sure! I know you aren’t done with that one yet, Spongebob, but how do ya feel about tryin’ somethin’ blue?” Oh, how easy it was to entice him. His wide eyes moved to her, the straw still between his lips.

“Blue..?” Ohh… Ohhhhhh… He loved blue… Anything blue Sandy made would definitely be good!

“As blue as yer pretty eyes.” She poked his nose. He mulled it over, but Frank made his decision for him instead.

“Yeah, we wanna see that one! If he doesn’t drink it, I will!”

“No no I’ll drink it I’ll drink it!” Spongebob said hurriedly, ditching his ‘just one’ policy in favor of pretty colors. Sandy couldn’t have been happier. He’d be smashed soon enough… And then… He might need a little push… And the pieces would fall into place. Larry shot the scientist a glare, but she ignored it and went skipping back to the kitchen.

“Hey, Sponge, maybe you should slow down a li—“ Larry stopped dead in the middle of his sentence and his eyes bulged upon seeing that HE’D ALREADY FINISHED IT. “Whoa—have you even eaten anything?! You should really take it easy, buddy!” Hearing Spongebob’s giggle made his stomach drop. Oh no. It had begun. If he’d not eaten anything to absorb it, with how fast he was downing those he’d be a goner in no time.

“Hee… Umm, I dunno. Maybe? Hey, Pat, did I eat anything?” Spongebob asked, leaning forward to see his friend who was three seats down from him, devouring the mountain of food he possessed. Hearing his name, he looked up, mouth stuffed with chicken.

“Uhhhh… Ahh…” Patrick had to swallow before he could speak. “I think I saw you eating some veggies and dip earlier?”

“Ohh, okay! Thanks, Pat!”

“Anytime, pal!” And right back to eating Patrick went. He wasn’t messing around – he’d already finished two plates. Spongebob’s smile returned to one unamused Larry Buffington.

“… Yeeeah. I mean, it’s something, but you should really have some turkey or mashed potatoes. Want me to get it for you?”

“Well…” The blond pouted down at his empty glass. “I wann’another… It’s all gone.” Larry was exasperated already. Sure, it was funny at first, but… He just – he wanted to protect Spongebob from doing something he’d really regret! Being drunk at a party was one thing. It happened. It wasn’t a big deal… But when you threw Squidward into the mix, things got risky, and Sandy pushing them together was a recipe for disaster. You could only blame so much on being drunk. What if he confessed his feelings in a sloppy and careless manner? Oh Neptune, the lack of a filter would lead to some really awkward professions. Just the thought sent a shiver down his spine – they might never see Squidward again after something like that. To his vexation, before he could speak further, Sandy brought a dream of a cocktail that indeed matched the cerulean of Spongebob’s irises as well as the water around them. It shimmered in the light enticingly. Drooling, Spongebob reached for it.

“Heeeeere y’are!” She chirped, but before she could hand it over, Larry snatched it from her.

“Sandy. C’mon, man. Let him take a break – you don’t want him getting sick, do you?” He held it up high so Spongebob couldn’t reach it, though that didn’t stop him from trying.

“Nngh—gimme—“

“Larry, why are you being such a party pooper?” Abigail whined. “What’s the problem? He’s cute when he’s drunk! Let him have fun! It’s a Christmas party!” The lifeguard soon found that the others were also chiming in to agree. Was he the only sensible one around here?! Squidward was the problem here, not Spongebob just being tanked! But… He reasoned that it wasn’t like Spongebob had never been intoxicated at a party Squidward was also at. It had gone alright then (even if Spongebob became clingier or flirtier), so why would it be any different now? Sandy, that was why. She had a specific goal in mind and it wasn’t just to let Spongebob flirt with Squidward on his own. No, she wanted more than that. She knew how tricky this situation was, why was she doing this?! Trying to force a change could go really badly… There was a possibility of success, but Larry wasn’t sure he wanted to bet on that.

“I hope you know what could happen,” Larry muttered to Sandy through a clenched jaw. This was serious stuff… She knew that. He understood that she wanted some progress – they all did, for Spongebob’s sake. But was this the way to go about it? Sandy’s demeanor shifted to that of uneasiness for a split second before she hid it.

“I’ve got it under control,” she said. Larry merely arched a doubtful brow and gave Spongebob his drink.

“Hm. Alright then, bro. Here you go. But take it slow this time, and eat something with it.”

“YAY!” Spongebob grabbed it right up and took a drink to see how it tasted. He wrinkled his nose a tad at first – this one had a stronger taste of alcohol. He was already buzzed, though, so it wouldn’t bother him too much. The cocktail kept him quiet while he savored it. Sandy served drinks to a few other people who wanted them, and things were relatively calm until Spongebob finished his third – probably quicker than he should’ve, but not as fast as the ones prior. “Ahhhh… Wowie, that was great! Thanks, Saaaandy~.” Looking down, he noticed a plate of some food Larry had gotten for him at some point. He scrutinized it, squinting – his vision was kinda… Blurry. What was even on this plate? Where had it come from? “Izzis… Bread?” He picked up what was indeed a piece of bread, sniffed at it, then took a nibble. Yes, this was probably bread. Maybe. Larry slid him some water as he snacked.

“Remember to always be hydrating, bud. It’ll help later when you wake up from this.”

“Thaaaaank yoooou~,” Spongebob sang, doing as he was told. Always be hydrating!! Yes!! He could do that! He’d make Larry proud! He downed his water, afterwards calling out for Sandy. “SANDY! LARRY SAID ALWAYS BE HYDRATING! CAN YOU MAKE ME ANOTHER?”

“I sure can, Spongebob! Whaddaya want?” Spongebob giggled giddily into his hands, swaying a bit. Larry didn’t bother to say anything, instead slapping a hand to his face. It was out of his control now.

“Sex~…” He didn’t finish saying the name of the drink for whatever reason.

“Oh, I’ll bet!” Evelyn laughed, and Abigail swatted at her.

“Oh my gosh, stoppp! Don’t be weird!” One more and he’d be utterly and completely wasted, even if Sandy skimped on the alcohol… Which she wouldn’t. Oh, she did hope he would forgive her in the morning… The brunette fetched him his desired Sex on the Beach, then watched him chug it aaaand…

“WOOOO! NOW THAT IS A DRINK! SEXIN’ ON THE BEACH IS RIGHT!” He stood suddenly then, slamming his hands onto the table, “PATRICK—Whoa…” Standing so fast disoriented him for a moment, but he recovered just as quickly. “PATRICK! LET’S TAKE IT FROM THE TOP, BUDDY! ARE YOU READY?!” Patrick’s head jerked up.

“Wha?”

“CHRISTMAS!”

“Oh—YEAH! Let’s do it!” Patrick eagerly jumped up as well and jogged over to his best friend. They took one another’s hand, both taking a step back in preparation.

“Here we goooo!” Frank grinned, leaning back to appreciate the show. The pair burst out into theatrical song and dance.

“IT’S SHAPING UP TO BE A WONDERFUL HOLIDAY! NOT YOUR NORMAL, AVERAGE EVERYDAY!” Squidward wasn’t in the room to sing his part (not that he would anyway), so someone else did it for him, as was tradition for every Christmas party. Poor Squidward.

“Sounds like someone felled my old coral tree! Spongebob, Patrick, why’d ya do this to me?!”

“THE WORLD FEELS LIKE IT’S IIIIIN LOVERLY~!”

“Go away before I harm you bodily!”

“THIS CHRISTMAS FEELS LIKE THE VERY FIRST CHRISTMAS TO MEEEEEEEE~!” Spongebob was a bit off-key – he was unsurprisingly having trouble controlling his cadence. He and Patrick pranced around, a spectacle for all to see that was only enhanced by Patrick’s snazzy light-up sweater. The crowd was going wild! “THERE’LL BE SHOPPING, DECORATING, AND PLENTY OF SNOW! HEY, PATRICK, WHO’S THAT UNDER THE—“ Spongebob stopped abruptly, leaving Patrick to tumble and narrowly miss colliding with a nearby end table. “… Mistle… toe?” It was as if something connected in his mind at that moment – he stared at a nearby doorway in which mistletoe hung. No one was there, but it seemed like something was processing – perhaps a revelation of sorts. Plankton and Krabs had even stood in preparation to sing their parts, but everyone was left hanging, watching Spongebob.

Bingo.

“HEY, WAITASECOND!” Spongebob began to search the room, distraught. “WHERE’S SQUIDDY?!” It was as if he’d just noticed, even though Squidward hadn’t stepped foot in the room once. The others looked around too. Not everyone was in the dining room – there were many guests littered about the house, all having their own fun, so Squidward could’ve been anywhere. The only real restrictions were the bedrooms upstairs; every other room in the house was open.

While nobody else seemed to know, Sandy did. She’d gone to find Squidward – he’d actually been hanging out upstairs with a book to get away from the noise for a short while. He’d not been there for too long when she’d investigated, so he was likely still there. “I saw him earlier, Sponge,” she said, to which Spongebob rushed to her and grabbed her shoulders.

“Where?! We need ‘im here! How can—how can he do his part?!” He shook her as if it were the direst situation in the universe. It wasn’t like he would do his part anyway, so others did it instead, but that didn’t seem to matter.

“I know! He needs ta stand under the mistletoe, right?” Larry watched as this unfolded before him – she’d planted the seed. It was all over now – they could only guess what might happen. Spongebob stared at her owlishly for a few moments, a little more color filling his cheeks to add to what was already there. Mistletoe… Yeah… His gaze moved behind her to a doorway where he’d hung the festive plant. He missed Squidward… He wanted to cuddle up to him… Why wasn’t he here? Maybe he was busy… But surely he’d spare a little time for his bestest friend in the whole world, right? Mistletoe…

“I wanna…” Spongebob took a very deep inhale. “… Wanna go get ‘im. He needs to join in on the fun! It’s not a party without Squidward! Patrick, buddy, can you cover for me? Make—make sure my snail doesn’t get eaten by the pineapple, okay?”

“Oh—you bet, Sponge! I’ll take real good care of him!” Patrick hadn’t had a single sip of alcohol, but hey. At least he understood it.

They all watched Spongebob run off ungracefully, stumbling and tripping on his journey upstairs. After he’d left, the people at the table began to discuss amongst themselves. “Fifty bucks they kiss,” Fred wagered.

“Ehhh, I dunno. He hasn’t tried it before, has he?” Frank asked.

“Well, who knows, but there’s mistletoe involved here!”

“What if he confesses?”

“That would be a mess. I think he is close to doing it, though, one of these days.”

“Okay, guys, rev up those bets! Let’s see if our boy finally gets some tonight!” Cheers were heard all around. Of course, everyone knew by now – if you saw the two of them interact with any regularity, his crush was plain as day. It had been like this for years; everyone was just waiting for something to happen.

So far, Spongebob had found nobody on the third floor, because it wasn’t a place guests usually went. The first and second floors were the main hangouts, but he wanted to be thorough. Geez… He felt kinda dizzy. His eyes weren’t entirely focused… “Squiiiddyyyy? Are you up heeere?” He called, checking each room. Where could he be? Spongebob needed him, for a lot of reasons! … Should he take his shoes off as a defensive maneuver in case of emergency? OH, but what if Squidward wanted to polish them? He’d better keep them on then, just in case. You never knew if your friend was going to want to polish your shoes. “I—whoa! Pardon me, miss, ah—“ He’d run into a lamp, not a person. Just as he was reaching one of the last rooms in the hallway, none other than Squidward was leaving it. “Oh—!” Spongebob skidded to a halt, and Squidward greeted him upon noticing him.

“Oh, hey, Spongebob. How’s the party going? I must admit, your library only gets more impressive as it grows.” Squidward stopped in the doorway, hooking a thumb in his pocket while shifting his weight to the opposite hip. He slouched just slightly, holding little tension in his shoulders. There was a certain warmth in his normally weary carmine eyes and the corner of his mouth twitched upwards in a half-smirk as he regarded Spongebob. Draped over his lanky frame was a sweater that was a little too large, contrasted by snug jeans. The other stared at him, gaping – he seemed so relaxed! And he was so… Handsome… That sweater looked marvelous on him… Spongebob swore he was blinded by the sheer beauty of it all. And… Wait a second… He was standing under mistletoe! Unless that was a set of keys hanging from the doorframe. But that wouldn’t make any sense. Or would it? But it was totally mistletoe, and… Sandy said… And… Mistletoe…

“Oooh, wow, Squiddy, you sure are lookin’ good tonight,” Spongebob slurred, taking a wobbly step closer. “I just looooove that sweater… I’ve been lookin’ all over for you…”

“Oh? Why-- … Wait a minute.” Squidward squinted down at him – he was sort of acting like… “Are you drunk?” Oh boy. Great. “Already? It’s only 8 o’clock, Spongebob.”

“Nnnoooooo~… I’m not drunk, heehee…” He was nearly salivating – Neptune, Squidward was so—mmph. Squidward simply shook his head.

“You’re hopeless. Anyway, you’ve found me, so we can go back downstairs now.” He’d had enough time to recharge from the social interaction. He wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to deal with an inebriated Spongebob, but eh, he would see. Maybe he’d stick around. It was entertaining to watch Spongebob while he was drunk sometimes. When Spongebob didn’t move aside, Squidward blinked. “Well? What are you waiting for?” Why was Spongebob looking at him like that..?

In Spongebob’s hazy mind, the fact that Squidward hadn’t moved out of the doorway and away from the mistletoe told him that he was definitely interested in making out. It entirely ignored the fact that he was standing in Squidward’s way and that he’d either have to retreat back into the room or push past him to get out from under the decoration. “Ooh, Squiddy,” he purred, “I’d love to… I’m so glad you want it too…” He never said anything of the sort, Spongebob.

At first, Squidward had been about to question why his neighbor was getting breathy over… Going downstairs. Soon, however, he found himself in absolutely no position to ask that question – or any other, for that matter. Before he could speak, the blond had advanced, stepping right up to him and leaning up on his tippy toes to press their bodies together. He ran a hand down Squidward’s chest, blatantly feeling him up, his free arm hooking around his neck to tug him down a little. Squidward was paralyzed with shock – what—? What was happening? Whoa, those bedroom eyes – holy SHRIMP, what was going on—?! Before he knew it, Spongebob had pivoted them a little and backed him up against the doorframe. “I’ll make it good, I promise…” A deep and sultry tone was not something Squidward heard from him often. Before any of this could register, he was met with an entirely new and even more startling sensation.

Spongebob had roughly fisted some of his hair, the other hand clutching his sweater, and yanked him down into a crushingly needy kiss. Squidward’s mind went completely blank, any and all thoughts evaporating instantly. His entire body went rigid and the wind was knocked from his lungs. He didn’t return the kiss – the world around him had disintegrated and he was lost in a sea of nothingness. Time ceased to exist. Was he dreaming? Had he himself gotten drunk and passed out? Where even was he? What was he doing? Who was with him? Who was… What was…

Unrelenting, the blond tugged again at teal locks to tilt Squidward’s head a little more for better access. With the sheer force of the kiss, Squidward had no choice but to kiss back but was entirely unaware of his doing so.

“Mmmm… Mmh… Mm…”

It was only when Spongebob’s muffled noises reached his ears that all at once, reality came crashing down onto him at warp speed. Time went into hyperdrive instead of standing still. Squidward’s heart gave a sharp lurch and his eyes flew open in astonishment for a brief second before they screwed shut once more. Opening his mouth to gasp had been an involuntary mistake – he was then electrified with the feeling of tongue. Not much, though – just a gentle and questioning lick that went no further.

What…

… In the NAME OF DAVEY JONES’S LOCKER WAS GOING ON?!?!

There was… This was… It… Spongebob…

Spongebob…

SPONGEBOB!!!

Spongebob was kissing him! Not just on the cheek, nose, forehead, head, shoulder, or wherever else… But… The LIPS!!! Was this a nightmare? Was he in hell? Had he gone mad? It—

IT STILL WASN’T OVER!

Squidward’s frantic thoughts were now interrupted by the exceedingly prominent physical sensations. He could hear himself panting – his body was boiling up. His face was on fire. He was sweating and his knees were weak. He felt so lightheaded – a feeble noise escaped him while Spongebob’s desperate whimpers filled his ears. He was just now noticing how nice Spongebob smelled – his shampoo and cologne surrounded him with something he didn’t often give much consideration to. The strongest thing he could taste was the alcohol – eugh. There was an underlying fruitiness, however, and beneath that… An indescribable taste that was none other than Spongebob’s own. Spongebob had gotten a little braver with that tongue of his, and oh… The hair-pulling, gah—the hand running down his side—

Why did it feel…

Good?

It was sloppy, it was forceful, it was wet, and it was mindblowing. It was driven by such brazen passion that it was enough to make anyone’s head spin. He just couldn’t refrain from making sounds, which was humiliating, but he didn’t really have time to worry about that when Spongebob was grazing his lower lip with his teeth. He didn’t bite – at least, not yet. Squidward clawed at either side of the wall connected to the doorframe behind him, having needed something to grip onto, although it wasn’t much.

“Squidmmmph…” Spongebob moaned between fervent kisses, relishing in the sweet and heavenly taste of the person he so dearly adored. This was a dream come true! He was so lucky! He never, ever thought he’d get a real chance to kiss Squidward! (And technically, he hadn’t.) This was everything he’d ever wanted… Apparently, all Squidward needed was a little bit of mistletoe to be interested in doing this! Maybe he should carry some around in his pocket!

Why was each enthusiastic and energetic kiss leaving Squidward positively breathless? Why did he kind of sort of maybe not want to stop? Why was this happening in the FIRST PLACE? Why was… Why…

WHY WAS SPONGEBOB A GOOD KISSER?!?!

Who had he been able to PRACTICE with!? It certainly wasn’t Sandy, for obvious reasons! So why wasn’t this more awkward?! Why wasn’t this a pathetic, laughable attempt?! Why was this one of the best kisses he’d ever—NO, DAMNIT! THIS WASN’T—THERE WAS NO WAY IT COULD BE ONE OF THE BEST, NO SIR! It was just heat of the moment! The moment that was NOT GOOD, it was – it was a pitiful display really – he was… He was so amazing with his tongue and lips and teeth and—

Squidward was about ready to collapse. Or scream. Or cry. Or vomit. Or die. Or all five. He’d legitimately just thought of Spongebob Squarepants as being a good kisser. Unironically. Maybe because Spongebob Squarepants was still making out with him. His gut seared with shame and something else he really didn’t want to acknowledge. Every last shred of his sanity had shattered, hadn’t it? Was he hallucinating? He was surely tripping the fuck out, right?

… No.

No, this was the real king of geeky, aggravating losers in the flesh, demonstrating his apparent prowess in the art of French kissing that he’d picked up from literally who knew where. The real Spongebob Squarepants turning Squidward’s mind into a puddle of mush. He was livid for so many reasons, but he was also…

Oh, Neptune, he wasn’t ready for this to end.

To his delight displeasure, Spongebob delivered on that, continuing to treat him to a wild, heart-stopping ride of passion. He loved hated the way Spongebob was tugging at his hair and squeezing his hip. The warm weight of his tiny body pressed against his own proved to be really comfortable detestable. He wasn’t at all attracted by his refreshing unremarkable scent. The sounds he was making were enticingly adorable extraordinarily inappropriate and not something Squidward ever wanted to hear in his entire LIFE.

The day Squidward Tentacles enjoyed a hot makeout session with Spongebob Squarepants was the day he declared himself officially insane beyond all repair. He was a lost cause and he was so disappointed in himself. How could he stoop so low? His mother would be ashamed. It—it was just the pheromones! That was all! He wasn’t really reveling in it – that was DISGUSTING!

… Why did he get the sense he’d recently been through a similar experience of questioning his soundness of mind due to Spongebob? Hadn’t he thought some of these exact same things not too long ago for some other reason?

After what seemed to be eons, Spongebob finally withdrew with a groan. A trail of saliva followed him that he broke by licking his lips. Squidward literally heard himself whine at the loss, and was ready to die of shame in that very instant. They were both gasping for breath, exhausted from their tryst. Squidward could feel Spongebob’s small frame shaking too. “Oh, Squiddy,” the blond breathed, feeling even more intoxicated from the divine taste of his friend’s mouth. Lidded eyes met wide ones. “Thank you for the Churrsmurs… Chr… Mmf…” His voice cracked as he spoke. Squidward noticed how messy the other’s hair had gotten and how it was sticking in his face… How scarlet his cheeks were and the way it lit up his freckles… How his eyes held such endearment and were glazed with desire… “Churrsmurs press’nt… Polishin’ my shoes…” Spongebob tried again, very obviously having great difficulty regaining his composure. “I hope y’liked it… Was good fer ya…” A loopy titter left him. Gee, the room had been spinning for quite a while now! “Mmmph… We can go stairs, uh… Down… Nnuh. Kay?” He had no idea where the stairs were and if he did he’d likely have to crawl down them, but he’d cross that bridge when he got to it. He gingerly took a dumbfounded Squidward’s cheeks into his hands and gave him one last tiny, affectionate peck on the lips before pulling away.

Of course, he stumbled a little, squeaking as he hit the other side of the doorframe – whoa. “Oof…” Gotta be careful with those dresser drawers, their teeth could be sharp sometimes… He recovered, though, and managed to sloooowly stagger down the hallway, until he eventually found the stairs – there they were! Ooh, where did they lead to? Boy, he was so dizzy. He was not going to make it safely down those stairs if he tried to walk. Instead, he merely laid himself on his stomach and dragged himself down, having absolutely zero problems with doing so. He was surfing down the stairs! Shoot, he forgot his boogie board… It was perhaps a sad sight to see, but what else would you expect from someone who was absolutely drunk off their ass and high on pheromones? He was the happiest guy in the whole entire universe. Nothing could bother him. Sandy happened to find him halfway down the second flight of stairs and yelped in alarm.

“Spongebob! Are y’all okay?!” She asked, racing to him and picking the poor sot up in her arms.

“Uh huh~…” Spongebob closed his eyes and curled into her, drooling on her suit. “Squiddy wuz real nice’n polished my shoes fer me… Dinn’t even hafta take ‘em off…” Brows raised as Sandy stared down at him. Polished his shoes… SHE KNEW IT! She KNEW they’d been smooching harder than two rabbits in a den in the beginning of April! SUCCESS! SHE’D DONE IT! SHE HAD FINALLY GOTTEN SQUIDWARD AND SPONGEBOB TO KISS! (Assuming that didn’t mean something else entirely, but that was unlikely.)

… Now to hope Squidward didn’t move out or something crazy like that. But she had a feeling… She could sense it, and she had been able to for a while now. She didn’t think Squidward would be going anywhere. Huff and puff as he might, she could see some inkling of emotion there – it was just buried deep, deep down. Even if she was wrong, hey, at least they tried, and she sincerely doubted Squidward would do anything drastic either way. Hopefully, though, this would give his thoughts on it a little jump start. She also hoped nothing else had happened, like an… Accidental confession. Oh, she prayed. Larry would kill her if that happened. And so would Spongebob, actually. Aaaand probably Squidward. So. She hoped it was just a kiss and nothing more. “Did y’all shine ‘em good?” She tucked Spongebob close and carried him downstairs into the living room, where she then sat herself on the couch and kept him curled up in her lap.

“Mmmhmmm… Reeeal good… This Churrsmurs feels like th’very firs’ Churrsmurs t’meeeeeee~…” Sandy gestured to nearby onlookers to be quiet. Spongebob promptly fell asleep, his mewling snores beginning almost immediately. He was completely conked out. A shame since they didn’t get to see too much of Party Sponge, but they could always give him more drinks later! Hearing Spongebob was back, Larry ran into the room, silently questioning what had happened. Sandy gave him a wink and a thumbs-up. He seemed surprised… And uneasy. But instead of making a fuss, he went to go get a blanket and some water for Spongebob. Hopefully he wouldn’t have too much of a hangover when he awoke. The other partygoers began to either celebrate or lament their loss – money had been on that kiss, and that kiss had happened!

Meanwhile…

Squidward had slid down the doorframe slowly the minute Spongebob left, gawking, staring blankly ahead, a hand over his mouth. He just sat there, flabbergasted and white as a sheet, unable to swallow any of this. There was literally nothing in his head. He was in a state of pure shock.

After a solid two minutes of static, a brief flash of a memory hit him and that was enough to flush his cheeks with a bright crimson and get him onto his feet. Having risen too fast, he reeled, but was able to orient himself and surveyed the area frantically.

He needed to leave. He needed to go home right now. He was going to just leave through the back door – better yet, he could jump out the window and hope for a concussion. However he did it, he just needed to go, before anyone saw him or talked to him or even thought of him. He thanked Neptune that he lived right next door – he didn’t have far to go. Squidward made a break for it, running as fast as he possibly could for the exit. His path was luckily clear until the last hallway, but he ignored whoever was standing there and hurtled the hell out of the cozy pineapple of a house, bubbles forming in his wake.

Upon arriving home, Squidward locked every single door and window in the Moai head, and, quivering slightly, just sat on his bed, head bowed, that same shell-shocked expression on his face.

He was having a great deal of trouble thinking. Five minutes passed and he hadn’t moved, nor processed any sort of thought. It was all just white noise. After a few more minutes, he lay down on his side, wriggling under his plush periwinkle blankets so he was at least… Sort of comfortable. It was then he spotted his teddy bear on the pillow across from him – Spongebob had won that for him when Krabs had bought a crane game to keep at the Krusty Krab.

Spongebob…

Tremoring fingers lifted to trace over his lips and the color ultimately surged back into his cheeks.

Spongebob… Kissed him…

The words now echoed in his head.

Wait; was he positive that had been real? It could’ve been a dream! Hold on, WHY WOULD HE DREAM ABOUT THAT?! EW! NO WAY! But—hold on. If he hadn’t dreamt it… That meant it really happened, right? He knew he wasn’t drunk… So… That could only mean one thing.

He’d actually made out with his neighbor, coworker, enemy, rival, definitely-not-friend. They had exchanged… Saliva. Touched tongues. Speaking of TOUCHING, Spongebob had totally groped his chest! Squidward had felt that! HOW HORRIFYINGLY IMPROPER! And then he’d felt up his side and hip. Squeezed, even! And how roughly he pulled on his hair! How dare he?! How dare he… How dare… How…

Squidward continued to ghost the tips of his fingers over his lips in remembrance.

… Why?

Was it just because he’d been drunk? There was no mistake he’d known who he was kissing, but… What had spurred it aside from the drunkenness? He’d never done that before and he’d been plastered at plenty of parties. Not to excess, but just in general. He was a pretty fun drunk, all things considered – though he did get… Flirty.

Wait.

That was right… Usually he became (even more) clingy and bolder in his flirting. But Squidward wasn’t the only one he attempted to woo! He went for Patrick, Sandy, sometimes Larry… On rare occasions, lamps… But usually, he went for… None other than Squidward. But it didn’t mean anything, right? He was just… That was just how he was, wasn’t it? The fact that he sought out Squidward for the kiss was merely a coincidence. He probably tried to kiss the entire party downstairs! It didn’t mean a single thing!

… That gleam in his eyes… That husky and seductive tone… Squidward shivered. He didn’t think Spongebob had it in him, but apparently… Not that he found it attractive or anything outrageously vile like that! He was simply stupefied by it, seeing as how much of a dork the guy was.

Spongebob had said it was his Christmas present, oddly enough. What did that mean? Why was a kiss from Squidward his Christmas present? Did that imply a kiss with everyone else was, too? Perhaps he meant kissing in general…

“Oh, puh-leeze, Squiddy, you know what he meant,” he growled at himself. Of course he’d meant Squidward specifically. There was no mistake about that. ‘Why’ was the only question to be answered. Maybe there was no reason, though – maybe it was just the booze talking, especially taking into account that he’d followed it by saying ‘thanks for polishing my shoes.’

…

As much as Squidward really didn’t want to contemplate it, he realized there was a very simple explanation to all of this. He wasn’t stupid. He knew it was different with him – even if Spongebob DID kiss everyone at the party, it would be different with Squidward. It would be different because his neighbor so very obviously had a crush. Anyone with half a brain could see it – and it wasn’t new, not by any means. Spongebob had been dropping hints left and right for… Squidward didn’t even know how long. A long while. He didn’t pay too much attention to it because it wasn’t his business. Spongebob had never straight up said anything about it so he had no reason to address it. He didn’t know how deep it ran, nor did he particularly care. It was just there, and he chose to ignore it. But… Because of the crush, that kiss… Meant something.

That passion had been a product of Spongebob’s feelings for him and he knew it. Squidward’s stomach churned. Oh, that was revolting. He would NEVER let it happen again. EVER. Who cared about Spongebob’s feelings anyway?! Eugh, how GROSS! So what if there was meaning behind it? It wasn’t like it mattered!

… How long had Spongebob wanted to do that for?

Squidward recalled their very first Christmas. The song they now held as tradition, much to Squidward’s irritation, originated there. Even back then, Spongebob had been oddly interested in Squidward being under the mistletoe. Jeez, that was years ago… Many years. Had he wanted that all this time? Had he held onto his little crush that long? Unless the infatuation was more recent and that incident had just been him being his weird self…

“… WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT THIS?!” Squidward shouted, clawing at his face. There was literally no reason to mull this over because it wasn’t important! Who cared if Spongebob liked him in a ‘more-than-friends’ manner?! Aside from that notion making him ill, it wasn’t of his concern! It wasn’t like he reciprocated those feelings in ANY way! It was what it was – it wasn’t being addressed and therefore it didn’t matter. It was really, really, really, really insignificant. It probably wasn’t even that big of a crush! WHATEVER! Even if it spurred the action, that wasn’t the important part. The important part was that he had just been kissed by—

Another wave of realization smacked him in the face.

He, Squidward Tentacles, had not only been just making out with his dreaded foe Spongebob Squarepants – he, Squidward Tentacles, had been making shamefully needy noises as he (unintentionally) returned the kiss. He, Squidward Tentacles, had squirmed under Spongebob’s touch as they kissed, and had maybe sort of enjoyed it a little.

He’d. Kissed. Spongebob.

Squidward began to scream at last. It had taken him long enough! So, to the shower it was! Time to wash away the impurity and the sin!

Nearly falling out of bed, he scrambled to the bathroom and dry heaved into the toilet until the nausea passed. He then proceeded to scrub his teeth SO HARD his gums bled. He didn’t care about the pain, SO LONG AS HE CLEANSED HIS MOUTH OF THIS FOULNESS! Afterwards, he paused to take a breath, accidentally thought about the situation, and then resumed his screeching. Those screeches soon devolved into sobs as Squidward hurried for the shower, stripped, and immediately began to scour his body with the soap. “NO! NO! NO! H-HE IS NOT A GOOD KISSER! HE IS NOT A GOOD KISSER! H-HOW DARE HE?! DISGUSTING, DISGUSTING, DISGUSTING!!!” Everything was a blur now. He’d lost his self-respect, his sanity, and his lunch from this debacle. A whole slew of emotions raged within him, some of which he had to desperately try to disregard.

Two hours later, one enervated Squidward hauled himself back to bed sluggishly after his purging was complete. He was going to have ONE HELL OF A TALK with a CERTAIN SOMEONE tomorrow. But wait – how could he even face him? How could he look Spongebob in the eye after such an exchange? How could he acknowledge what they’d done? He couldn’t! He couldn’t, it was too humiliating and – NO. He needed to. He needed to be firm and tell him that… That it should never happen again. And that he absolutely hadn’t liked any of it. And that would be that. Nothing more, nothing less. Or, okay, maybe just a little more yelling and telling him how awful it had been. Yes. That would work. He could do it. He was mortified, but he had to press on. He could only pray that no one else had heard about it… After their talk, he’d pretend this NEVER EVER happened and move on with his life. All he had to do was not think about it. How hard could that be?

The next morning, Squidward was a nervous wreck – one glimpse of his ghastly pallor would tell you that. For reasons beyond his comprehension, his hair would not cooperate today – no matter how much he brushed it, it refused to stay put, as if it wanted to spite him by adding to his disheveled look. Reddened eyes and deep facial lines of fatigue implied quite a few things. His anxiety announced itself emphatically by way of making him run his tense, shaky hands up and down his arms then around his sides and back repeatedly in frenzied motions. Getting to work had been an extremely taxing process – he’d struggled the entire way, and it wasn’t just due to the wintry weather. What if people knew? What if Spongebob said something? What if he wanted more? What if he thought Squidward enjoyed it? WELL HE’D RECTIFY THAT ONE! Because he DIDN’T! And he could look Spongebob straight in the eye and TELL HIM THAT WITH UTMOST SINCERITY! (Hopefully.) It was fine. He’d be fine. It would all be fine. Nobody else knew. It had just been a mistake and would never happen again – he’d make sure of it. Spongebob probably hadn’t even noticed the noises Squidward had made, so there was nothing to be ashamed of! IT WAS FINE.

The worn-down mess of a cashier crept to his station cautiously after forcing himself to enter the double doors, wringing his hands while his eyes darted to and fro. The Krusty Krab was quiet and still. No customers were around yet… Mr. Krabs was in his office… Where was Spongebob?

His question was soon answered by a yawn that caused him to jump.

“Ohh boy…” Speak of the devil – Spongebob toddled along on his way to the kitchen, rubbing at his eyes. He didn’t look as terrible as Squidward did, but he certainly wasn’t at his best. He seemed tired, but otherwise okay. All… Cutely bundled up like that in his snow gear. With his gloves and his hat and his scarf and his coat and his booties… “Morning, Squiddy,” he said, offering him a sleepy smile as he passed. The other was thrown off-guard when Spongebob walked right past him. Without a single mention of the party. What the HELL?! Newly enraged, Squidward called after him.

“SPONGEBOB!” He snapped. The blond pivoted on his heel a few steps away from the kitchen door, blinking.

“Wha huh?” Whoa, Squidward was mad already? What had he done?! Squidward faltered under Spongebob’s inquisitive stare that penetrated his very soul. He took a harsh inhale to steel himself.

“LAST NIGHT…”

“Ohhh! Yeah, some party, huh?” Spongebob nodded with a soft chuckle. That was probably why Squidward looked so rough – he must’ve had a LOT of fun! He was so glad. “I’m just tired ‘cause I kinda drank too much and stayed up a lil’ too late… But it was a good time, right? Were you there when we played Christmas Mad Libs? And then Christmas charades? And then ‘dress a person up as a Christmas tree?’ And then Christmas carol-oke? That was lots of fun, hehe.”

“WHA—No, I—!” Why was he being so casual?! Did he just not care about what had happened?! How could he even think to act this way?! “No, I meant earlier—“

“Ohh, earlier? Umm…” Spongebob’s brow furrowed contemplatively. “Like… Earlier as in… When we marathoned Christmas movies? Oh man, I wanna watch more tonight! I need to see Elf again!”

“NO! Earlier than that, you dunderhead!” Jeez, how long had they partied for?! “Right after dinner or—or whatever!” Squidward noticed Spongebob’s expression turn into that of bewilderment and his blood ran cold.

“… Right after dinner? Ummm…” The Krusty Krab’s star frycook scratched at his head, thinking as hard as he could. “Gee, Squidward, I… I think I remember Sandy gave me a drink during dinner… And then… Uh, I dunno. I think I got tired and took a nap and when I woke up a little later, the real party began! Let me tell you, she makes some killer baybreezes. And the best part is I don’t even have a hangover because Larry helped me keep myself hydrated!” How much Spongebob had imbibed was anyone’s guess – though it likely wasn’t much after he woke up from his nap. He only really drank at parties every now and again, so it was pretty easy to bring out the Party Sponge and put the Anxious Host Sponge to rest.

Squidward gawked in stunned silence. He’d… No way. No way. He’d… Forgotten? Spongebob had entirely forgotten about their encounter?! How… HOW DARE HE?! THIS ASSHOLE HAD THE GALL TO WALTZ IN, KISS HIM SO HARD HE QUESTIONED REALITY, LEAVE, FALL ASLEEP SOMEWHERE, AND FORGET WHAT HAD EVEN HAPPENED?! “Y-yuh… You… You…” Concern crossed Spongebob’s face as Squidward began to twitch.

“… Uh… Squiddy? Why are you twitching like that?”

“Yuh—you—y-y—I—gghh— AAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!” Squidward voiced his frustrations once again, yanking at his unruly hair. Spongebob flinched and, with a squeak, instinctively raised his arms to shield himself. Before he could inquire any further, the other stormed off with long strides, seething. Right out of the Krusty Krab and into the mounds of snow that blanketed Bikini Bottom.

“I CANNOT BELIEVE HIM!” Squidward shouted at a nearby snowman, who did not reply. “WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS?! HE—WE—I— DIDN’T IT MEAN SOMETHING TO HIM?!” Cheeks blazing, he covered his mouth with a gloved hand.

Had he really just said that? He just got done insisting it didn’t MATTER what it meant to Spongebob! And it… AND IT DIDN’T! It was just that..! It was downright INSULTING! So Spongebob kisses the guy he likes and FORGETS?! Who would forget about something like that?! Even if the guy he likes hates him, the guy he likes is still super beautiful and fabulous and NOBODY should be able to forget the sizzling experience he’d gift to them! It was a PRESENT, all right! (Oh, don’t be full of yourself, Squidward.) All of that – all of that moaning and biting and licking and grabbing – ALL FOR WHAT?! FOR NOTHING?! HE’D HAD TO ENDURE THAT HELL FOR – FOR NOTHING?! HE HAD TO BE TORTURED BY IT AND SPONGEBOB COULD JUST GO ALONG WITHOUT A CARE IN THE WORLD?!

It was true that Spongebob had forgotten – that part of the night was completely blanked out for him. He was under the impression he drank too much and passed out… Which was precisely the case give or take a few details, and it probably wasn’t the greatest idea to drink more after that, but hey. While he was clueless, their other friends weren’t. Oh no, they most certainly knew. They didn’t tell Spongebob for a specific reason – they really did not want him having a meltdown because they knew what he’d done hadn’t caused any lasting damage, and… It was fun to watch Squidward squirm. Especially in situations like this. So, if asked, they’d all pretend they had no idea either and just enjoy the show. It was a shame, though. Spongebob had his first kiss with the man he loved… And had no recollection of it.

Squidward spent a few minutes kicking at snow while yelling incoherently and snorting like an angry seahorse. Powdery crystals of ice sprayed in every direction during his rampage. The snowman sat there, a motionless observer. It was FINE! He didn’t care! Why would he care?! GOOD! This was GREAT, actually! He didn’t want Spongebob to remember! Because that meant he could just throw the memory away without issue! Without being reminded of it or pestered about it! He could pretend it never happened just like he wanted! He didn’t have to suffer – he could just ignore it, no problem! “Stupid Spongebob! Moron! IDIOT! BARNACLEHEAD!” He was only angry because he’d been subjected to torment and it had all been for naught! It was so RUDE! That guy was a real piece of work! “’I’ve been lookin’ all over for you, Squiddy!’” He mimicked bitterly, still stomping around. The darkened water overhead easily paralleled his mood. “YEAH, WELL, YOU’D BETTER NOT ‘LOOK FOR ME’ AGAIN! EVER! I WON’T ALLOW IT!” He never, EVER wanted more! He never wanted to feel the rushing warmth created by affectionate touches, or breathy sighs against his lips, or hair tickling at his jaw, or arms wound tightly around him, or…

He finally stopped and released a distressed wail, burying his face into his hands. HE WAS SO LONELY! He’d been single for such a long time! Far too long, really, and – wait a second…

It suddenly dawned on him that the only reason he sort of maybe (DIDN’T) enjoy that kiss was because… He was just so deprived of physical contact. Squidward didn’t want it to be Spongebob, he wanted it to be someone else… But Neptune hated him too much to grant him that. He’d almost forgotten what it was like to kiss someone… The reminder was painful. Maybe he should try finding a date again? That way, he wouldn’t have to feel so weird about this kiss with Spongebob, because he knew he was just lonesome and unused to such interactions! Yes… That was it! While it was horrifying to think he’d sunk so low and become so desperate he would even slightly savor any sort of contact with his neighbor, it made some sense given his current relationship status. He sank to his knees, reassured, a hand over his pounding heart.

“Oh, thank Neptune…” Squidward sniffled while rubbing at his face, some tension lifting from his stiff shoulders. “M-maybe I’m not so crazy after all… Just—just pathetically desperate. I… B-but I never want to experience that with him again! I’ll try to – to find someone. And then the joke will be on HIM! HA! He’ll still be a single loser and I won’t be!”

Desperate indeed, Squidward. That’s precisely why you’d been haunted by sexual fantasies of Spongebob masturbating when you found his collection of adult items some months ago. Desperation. That had been repressed, though, as this too might be. At the time, he’d been unyielding in his assertion that there was no way he was needy enough to daydream about Spongebob and the fact that he had was only due to his discovery forcing the repulsive imagery upon him. Now, he was relieved by the fact that he had ‘only liked it because he was lonely and needy.’ An interesting development, to be sure.

He’d run out of steam – it was time to go back inside. Eased by his realization, he would put all of this behind him and forget about it just like Spongebob did. The snowman, having grown tired of Squidward’s antics, turned and slid away, leaving him. A scoff sounded. “Puh. Some help he was. Snowmen are always so flaky.” He paused, and was then unable to prevent himself from snickering at his fortuitous pun. “Heh. Flaky. Snowmen, hahah. Oh, Squiddy, you are a true genius. You may be a deplorable pile of garbage, but you’re a damn genius.”

Spongebob watched his friend return through the kitchen window, his head resting in his arms which were propped up on the sill. To his astonishment, Squidward seemed to be in a much better mood now – his shoulders were no longer up to his ears and there was a swagger in his step. “Maybe he just needed to vent,” the blond mused, having seen his tantrum outside. What about last night could have possibly invoked such wrath? It was hard to tell just why he was upset sometimes, because what he said wasn’t always the truth. Even if there was obviously more to the story, it didn’t mean Spongebob would be able to figure it all out. It was distressing because all he wanted was Squidward’s happiness… He just had to keep trying his best to provide him with love and care.

“Spongebob.” He was wrenched back into reality by Squidward marching right over, placing his hands either side of Spongebob’s elbows, and leaning down just slightly with a triumphant smirk on his face. The other jerked back a little.

“Ah—?”

“You know that I hate you, right?” Squidward asked in a voice as sweet as honey – a tone that didn’t match his words in the least.

“Uh… Oh, uhm… Yeah?” Spongebob managed, feeling just slightly intimidated by such a direct approach paired with – well, you know. Hearing ‘I hate you’ wasn’t always that pleasant.

“And you know I’m not interested in ever doing anything of any sort with you, right?” Squidward had to be careful with what he said – he didn’t want to mistakenly lead Spongebob to believe something happened last night that he’d forgotten about.

“Uh huh?” Spongebob squirmed in discomfort. Satisfied, Squidward turned around to man his post.

“Good. I just wanted to remind you.” Ahhh, there! All better! Now that was cleared up! All he had left to do was destroy the memory. Spongebob sighed and padded back to his station as well. Squidward had been in such a good mood last night, too… He wondered if something happened. He had tried to make that party perfect, but perhaps he’d screwed up somehow. He sure hoped not. Either way, Squidward seemed okay now..? So it was likely best to leave it be.

The rest of the day went by without incident. Patrick swung by the Krusty Krab to invite Spongebob to go sledding with him to which he happily agreed – at the end of their shift, he donned his stupidly cute winter outfit and waved to Squidward before leaving. Ignoring him, Squidward headed home to relax and revitalize. That would henceforth be the motto: ignore Spongebob. Over the next couple of days, his attempt to do so was actually going decently well – he kept himself distracted, paying no attention to Spongebob and trying not to think about the thing until one afternoon when Sadie Asbury and Jennifer Millie walked into the Krusty Krab…

The pair entered holding hands, and they initially didn’t quite approach the counter – they stood back, studying the menu. “What did you want, sweetie?” Sadie asked. Squidward’s gaze flickered upwards from his magazine – they were huddled awfully close… It was cold, but…

“I don’t know, babe… I kind of wanted to try something different today…” Squidward’s brows rose steadily. Since when were they dating? That was news. He was a total sucker for gossip, so he paid attention to these things just in case something juicy was going on. Still, it wasn’t all that fascinating until a few moments later when Jennifer took Sadie’s face in her hands, giggling.

“Heehee! Do you know how red your cheeks are? It’s so cute!”

“Wha—hey, it was cold out! I’m trying to decide, c’mon!” Despite her protests, Sadie laughed in kind. Squidward couldn’t help but watch as Jennifer leaned in and kissed both of Sadie’s red cheeks, her nose, and then her lips. It was a brief gesture of endearment, but it caused Squidward to twitch and blush all the same. A sigh from behind him took him by surprise.

“Awww…” Spongebob, who had come to deliver an order, was looking on from the window with a dreamy expression, his cheek smushed into his palm. “How cute… So she did end up asking her out! Gosh, I’m so happy for them…”

“GAH!” Squidward’s cry attracted attention from not only Spongebob, but the women in question. “Spongebob what—“ He whipped around and, after taking one glance at his coworker, made a strange choking noise that stopped his sentence in its tracks. He had been avoiding looking at Spongebob for more than very brief periods for days now. In failing that, and making eye-contact to boot, he was instantly reminded of the thing.

For some reason, the sight of him just – something about – was his tie looser than normal? His hair seemed shinier too… And was that shirt tighter and more form-fitting than the others he owned? Was he hallucinating or—? Holy shrimp, was that cologne? Or was that his soap? Or maybe it was his natural aroma?! Why did it smell so AMBROSIAL now?! It wasn’t like Squidward never actually noticed the way he smelled; it had just become so oddly prominent since the thing! And WHOA, WHOA, WAIT A SECOND. HOLD ON A MINUTE. Glasses?! Since when did… Glasses—! DORKY, GEEKY, thick, black square frames that illuminated the stunning blue of his irises. That was—they were—he knew they existed, but Spongebob rarely wore them to work! He used his contacts more often than not! But wow, they looked really… Maybe he should wear them more often… The guy wasn’t doing anything but standing there, and yet—!

What Squidward is seeing: “Oh, I’m sorry, Squidward, I was just so distracted~… Did you need something~..?” Sparkles float about the kitchen while sexy jazz music plays in the background. Spongebob has cutely knocked his glasses askew with the hand that was pressed to his cheek. His spatula dangles daintily from the hand brought to his chest. He bats his long eyelashes as he speaks in an airy and teasing manner. His smile is demure, but there is a veiled playfulness that flickers within his cerulean depths. Half of his shirt is unbuttoned his tie is undone for no explicable reason.

What is actually happening: “Um, Squidward? Is everything alright?” Spongebob asks, concerned and terribly perplexed. He stands up straight, tilting his head just slightly as he waits for an answer. His shirt is of normal tightness and his tie is correctly drawn to his neck. Nothing is out of the ordinary. He is not about to start dropping patties ‘accidentally’ in order to flaunt his rear whilst picking them up or anything of the sort. He is simply standing there.

Poseidon help him, Spongebob’s lips looked so soft… The worst part was that Squidward now knew they actually were. Try as he might to bleach his brain, the knowledge remained. So pink and full… Slightly parted… Given a slight sheen from the lights… Just begging for a ki—

And at that point he’d had about enough. Squidward clasped his hands over his mouth with a look of sheer mortification. He’d gone a nice rich shade of crimson. With no hesitation, he leapt over the side of the cashier’s boat and ran for the bathroom. By some miracle, it was empty. He stumbled over to the sink and used it for support, wheezing, a tremble surging through his body. “C-c-calm down Squiddy, calm— calm— pull yourself together—“ He splashed cold water on his face to combat the scorching heat. “What am I THINKING?!” What method of sorcery was this?! What spell had Spongebob cast upon him?! Perhaps it was how utterly bewitching his gaze could be? Or maybe… “NO. Stop – enough.” He took the deepest possible breath he could to cease the downward spiral of his tumultuous thoughts. It was alright. All that happened was that he saw a couple kissing and there was NO need to freak out. The incident was still fresh so naturally, he’d be reminded of it. Everything was cool. He wasn’t thinking weird things about Spongebob and if he were, he didn’t mean it – his brain was just… Mixed up! He’d be okay. Easy. Deep breaths.

He felt weak… Oh, and FISHPASTE, he’d made a huge scene! He could hardly believe how badly this whole thing was fucking him up. He really had lost it and he could only wonder how he’d managed to sink lower than he ever imagined possible. Inevitably, Spongebob had been overcome by worry for his best friend, and his dramatic entrance of calling out the other’s name created another kerfluffle and poor Squidward ended up on the floor. “SQUIDWARD?! OH MY STARS AND GARTERS, ARE YOU SICK OR SOMETHING?! WHAT’S WRONG!?” Spongebob knelt down beside him and gripped his shoulders, panic-stricken. Rather than answering, Squidward merely dropped his head and panted, struggling to regulate his system. “Squid—guh—I’m—what…” Spongebob stuttered a few times, but in seeing he was getting no responses, instead forced himself to do the same to reduce the sky-high tension in the room.

The pair soon quieted themselves, and after a few moments of silent recalibrating, Squidward smacked Spongebob’s hands away and stood up, blinking away the unbidden tears in his eyes. “Don’t touch me,” he growled. “I’m fine. It’s none of your business. Leave me ALONE. I just have… A bit of a fever or something, and it’s making me feel weird. It’ll pass, and I DON’T need you mollycoddling me over a silly little flu. And if you dare say one word, Spongebob, so help me. Do. Not.” Gods above, HE needed a drink. A lot of them, actually. Or maybe he didn’t, since he was already fucking horrendously delusional. He half-wondered if he really did have the flu or if someone was secretly spiking his food or something. Gee, this all felt REALLY familiar for some reason… Though he wasn’t looking at Spongebob, he could hear tiny sniffles, but he was too furious and baffled by it all to care. Of course he was crying. What a shock. … Oh well. At least humiliating himself in front of customers was nothing new… And at least Spongebob was listening for once.

Squidward turned to leave, hoping the customers would shrug off what they’d just witnessed, but to his ever-present luck, he was met with their boss.

“Hold it RIGHT there, Mister Squidward! WHAT is goin’ on with you boys?! Yer leavin’ the customers by themselves out there! What’s all this fuss? Why’s Spongebob cryin’ on the floor? Why’d yeh go scarin’ me customers, Squidward? What is the problem here?!” The burly blue-clad man stood with arms crossed and foot a-tappin’. Eugene was none too happy – their antics were interfering with the flow of money! If only it weren’t so expensive to hire extra employees for when his first mates went AWOL…

“There is no PROBLEM, Mr. Krabs.” Squidward forcefully pushed past him, hands balled into fists at his sides. He refused to look at anyone, instead choosing a nice spot on the floor to stare at, wishing his cheeks would stop burning. “I think I’ve come down with the flu. That’s all. I was feeling a bit faint. I’m fine now.”

“The flu?! OH no, no employee of mine is gonna be contaminatin’ the food, the money, or the customers! Get yer hindquarters OUTTA HERE, Mister Squidward!” Eugene instructed, pointing to the front doors. He didn’t have to tell Squidward twice, that was for sure. In all honesty, he knew that it wasn’t a flu that had his employee all ruffled… But he’d begrudgingly allow it to run its course rather than say anything about it. If it was stirring things this much, maybe it would lead the two closer to an answer for their relationship. Maybe they’d finally get together and stop wasting so much damn time on this song and dance – then they’d make him more money since they wouldn’t have to keep disrupting things with it!

Squidward was slightly surprised by his boss’s allowance, but wasted no time in taking flight. Any and all stares and whispers were disregarded as he trudged right out of the restaurant to his boat while trying not to cry, his boots crunching loudly in the snow. It was fine. He hadn’t just made a complete imbecile of himself. No, no, NO. Time to go home. Time to take the week off and sleep the entire time.

Still sitting on the bathroom floor, Spongebob shuddered in distress – why wasn’t he allowed to help? Was Squidward really sick or was it something else? This was scary! He sniveled. Eugene helped him up and offered him a handkerchief. “Don’t worry about it, lad. It isn’t really that serious. He’ll be alright; he just needs some time to ‘imself. Try lettin’ him come to yeh when he’s ready, okay? It ain’t personal – he just ain’t feelin’ well and you know how that goes.” Krabs rolled his eyes. How crabby Squidward could become was astounding at times. His opinion was that the guy needed a good smack or five to set him straight, but he doubted it would work.

“Bu—bu—is he… D-do you know what’s going on..?” Spongebob wiped at his face with the handkerchief, still giving quiet hiccups and shaky sighs. Squidward ignoring him wasn’t all that shocking, but today’s reaction was so strange, and combined with the day after the party… He just couldn’t figure it out. He wanted to know!

“Well, I haven’t heard of any flus goin’ around, but with this blasted weather, I don’t doubt it,” Eugene said, glancing over at Spongebob. There was a pause when green met blue.

“… Are you sure?” Spongebob asked in a muffled voice from behind the handkerchief that he’d pressed over his nose and mouth, his watery eyes trained intently on the other. Eugene opened his mouth to respond, but at first, nothing came. He could tell… Spongebob knew. The boy was fully aware that it wasn’t a flu that was plaguing Squidward. He wasn’t stupid – okay, well, at times he could be, but he could also be very insightful and incisive. In that moment, Eugene wanted to tell him – he felt bad for him, and just… Oh, what a fine mess this was. Telling the truth would only worsen things; while it would explain Squidward’s moodiness, Spongebob would just be so utterly destroyed knowing he’d done that and even more wounded by the reaction it got and it just… It wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t worth breaking the poor thing with anxiety because it really wasn’t that big of a deal. If Squidward told him, that would be handled accordingly, but the chances of that were slim to none. Squidward could take care of himself. His hissy fit would fizzle out soon. And maybe, just maybe, he’d learn a damn thing or two from it. This whole ‘not-so-secretly in love with Squidward’ situation would eventually hit a turning point… It was certainly ramping up. He hoped that it would wind up being beneficial for Spongebob. If only he could persuade him to chase anyone other than Squidward! Ah, but attempts at that had failed so far, and would continue to fail so long as Spongebob held out hope that there was a prospect of being with him.

Exhaling, Eugene reached out and gave Spongebob’s shoulder a solid squeeze, compassion gracing his features. “… No. I’m not sure, Spongebob. It could be anything. But, whatever it is, just let it be. It’ll pass.” Clearly, Spongebob wasn’t happy with this answer. He clutched the kerchief as he lowered it, his lip wibbling again.

“But—“

“No.” Eugene pressed a finger to his lips to shush him straightaway. “No, Spongebob.” A whine. “No. I know yer worried, but you need to stop. Go read a book or watch TV or whatever it is that you kids do. Just go clear yer head and stop tryin’ to fix something that doesn’t need to be fixed! Let him do it on his own.” Spongebob tried to protest no further. He only wilted – that wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but… Maybe Mr. Krabs was right. Maybe it was just something he had to let go of. It was hard because he was afraid he’d done something wrong, but… Squidward probably wasn’t going to tell him, so there was nothing he could do no matter what.

“… Aye aye, sir…”

“Good boy! Now off with yeh, go make me some money! And it’s Christmastime y’know – go look at lights or go ornament shoppin’ after work! Do something fun, treat yerself! Forget about that old stick-in-the-mud!” Eugene guffawed then, thumping his employee on the back so hard it knocked him off-balance.

“Wah! Uh—I…” With the force of the gesture, his glasses were knocked slightly down the bridge of his nose – after adjusting them, he chewed on his lip thoughtfully. Well… That did sound pretty fun… He did love going around the city to see all the lights! As long as he bundled up, he could window shop and maybe buy some presents for people! “I… Yeah. Okay, yeah, you’re right! I will!” A resolute nod. He just had to put his mind to something else – he could go see the FAKE SANTA! Those were like the real Santa, except they were just his helpers and they were all over the world! They looked similar to him but you knew it was a helper if he was working at someplace like a mall. The real Santa only had time to visit peoples’ houses on Christmas Eve, after all! He gasped. “MR. KRABS! Did the helper Santa set his workshop up at the mall yet?!” Eugene watched in relief as life and enthusiasm returned to Spongebob.

“Err, I dunno. I think so! You should go check later! Just finish rakin’ in the dough for today first. And if yeh see Pearlie when yer there… Please tell ‘er to stop spendin’ all me money!” He groaned at the mere thought of it. She had her own job and she was STILL using his money! Little bloodsucker… Took after her father, she did. He was proud, but his wallet sure wasn’t. Spongebob gave a little laugh.

“Will do, sir! I’M READY! ORDER UUUUUUUP!” He cheered, jogging back to his post to turn those customers’ frowns UPSIDE-DOWN! The thought of talking to Santa (or in this case, Santa’s assistant) was totally revving him up! He couldn’t WAIT! He was grateful to have Mr. Krabs to lean on for advice. He was feeling better already!

“I can’t believe this. I can’t. What was I doing earlier? Why was—was his shirt really unbutto—OF COURSE IT WASN’T, YOU ABSOLUTE KELP-FOR-BRAINS! What is the MATTER with me?! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?! I’VE DONE NOTHING WRONG! I don’t deserve this! This agony, this woe – it’s ENTIRELY unjustified! I have been nothing but a compassionate and kind person, and THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?! Thoughts of—of SPONGEBOB OF ALL PEOPLE?! And not only that, but having to endure a KISS from him!? I’VE GOT A REAL BONE TO PICK WITH YOU, KING NEPTUNE! His—he—it’s HIS fault for wearing those GLASSES and for being so IMPROPER as to UNDO HIS SHIRT AND TIE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WORKDAY! POLISH HIS SHOES, WHY I NEVER! AND THEN HE FORGETS! WHAT AN ASSHOLE! I HATE HIM SO DAMN MUCH! I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM! HE DOES NOTHING BUT CAUSE ME ANGUISH! HE’S SO FUCKING INFURIATING AND RUDE AND IGNORANT AND IMBECILIC AND DISMISSIVE OF FEELINGS AND DISRESPECTFUL OF BOUNDARIES AND CLINGY AND PUSHY AND ATTENTION-HUNGRY AND SELFISH AND EGOTISTICAL AND PRESUMPTUOUS AND FUCK!! FUCK HIM! I DESPISE EVERY FIBER OF HIS BEING! SOMEONE LIKE HIM DOESN’T DESERVE ME! I’M TOO GOOD FOR HIM! I SHOULD HAVE ONLY THE BEST! HE’S NOTHING BUT A BOTTOMFEEDER AND HE ISN’T EVEN WORTHY OF BREATHING THE SAME WATER AS I DO! HOW DARE HE MAKE ME FEEL THIS WAY?! HOW DARE HE RESORT TO UNDERHANDED TRICKERY TO MAKE ME—TO MAKE ME FEEL—AND SORT OF THINK HE’S—AGH! NO! Don’t fall for it, Squiddy! He’s not—it’s FINE! IT’S SO FUCKING FINE THAT I’M GOING TO FUCKING, JUST, FORGET ABOUT IT! IT HONESTLY NEVER EVEN HAPPENED AND I CAN JUST GO ON HATING HIM LIKE USUAL! I WON’T NEED TO DISGRACE MYSELF IN FRONT OF OTHERS BECAUSE I WON’T HAVE ANY WEIRD ASS THOUGHTS! LOOK, I’LL EVEN PROVE IT RIGHT NOW—“

Squidward was ranting and raving at the top of his lungs, doing anything to try to expel this unspeakable sickness that poisoned his body and mind. He was storming about his house, throwing anything unbreakable he could find. Upon making his eighteenth lap around his home, he circled back to his television whilst evading fallen objects, plopped his ass right down on the couch, and in some crazy, desperate attempt to prove that this wasn’t at all affecting him, turned on a romance movie. In order to calm his blistering blood, he panted harshly, bubbles forming each time his chest heaved. His teal tresses were completely ruffled and wild from him running about and pulling at them. He was so unkempt and out-of-sorts and it was so damn hot he was this close to running outside and faceplanting in the snow. … In all honesty, that was actually a good idea.

The beginning of the movie was mild enough that Squidward was able to ease his ragged breaths and fall into a stoic stillness. The main characters met one another and blah blah blah falling in love blah wacky antics blah blah. It was when they started getting closer that he became nervous. It was okay. Just two characters realizing their feelings for each other and going out on a date. Nothing wild or crazy here. “T… Take it easy, Squiddy old boy… Perhaps doing this today wasn’t the best idea…” He was still jittery from earlier. Soon, the time for the first kiss came, and he held his breath – here it was. The moment of truth. Carmine eyes were glued to the television as the pair embraced, running their hands over one another’s bodies, crooning affectionately in each other’s ears… The main character first kissed up their partner’s neck, then along their jawline to their chin… Their lips met, and Squidward swallowed thickly. It was a sensual, romantic kiss. It didn’t last for too long, and when they pulled back, they smiled, laughed, and held each other tight. This one was definitely more intimate than what he’d seen at the Krusty Krab.

His gaze gradually lowered after the scene ended. Trying his best to prevent himself from blushing, he stared down at his lap, hands clenched into fists. He breathed a puff of water. Unfortunately, his efforts to stop the heat were wasted – he reddened significantly as he processed the scene. Breathe… Calm… Breathe…

…

His kiss with Spongebob had been more of the needy, frenzied and passionate kind rather than the slow and sensual… What would it be like if..?

Naturally, Squidward began to shriek at the notion. This was becoming such a frequent occurrence that it was a wonder Neptune didn’t hear him all the way from Atlantis.

WHAT WAS THAT THOUGHT JUST NOW?! He’d FAILED! He’d utterly and wholly FAILED! Such a simple test – FAILED! WHY WAS IT SO DIFFICULT TO STOP THINKING ABOUT THE DAMN KISS?! WHY HAD HE JUST IMAGINED ANOTHER?! He had TOTALLY just envisioned what it would be like to have that sort of serene and languid kiss with Spongebob! Oh, NEPTUNE! He’d legitimately imagined HIMSELF… Holding Spongebob tight… Running his hand down his back to rest just above his tailbone… While Spongebob’s hands roam aimlessly around his torso in turn… And Spongebob smiles and giggles softly against his lips between kisses… Then Spongebob moves to kiss lazily at his jaw and neck, and then nuzzles his collarbone…

This ended in him flopping onto his side in defeat and merely bawling into his hands. This was too much. It was EXCRUCIATING. He hated this – hated every second of it – hated the person causing it, hated that he couldn’t stop these invasive thoughts, hated that he was so weak, hated that he’d stooped so low, hated that his mind had apparently deteriorated altogether, hated the sick part of himself that seemed to like it, hated the fact that he was single and craved affection, hated the fact that he couldn’t fucking control himself in any capacity and repeatedly made an utter buffoon of himself in public, hated the nightmarish visions his mind conjured up, hated the fact that Spongebob had dared kiss him in the first place… He needed to call his therapist. Pronto. She’d know what to do. Maybe she could hypnotize him into forgetting? She likely didn’t have any specialization in that, but it was worth a shot to ask…

Squidward’s overdramatic and excessively volatile reactions to the subject of Spongebob would seem outlandish to anyone. They were unnecessary and unreasonable. They were undeserved and unfair to Spongebob. They were unhealthy for the both of them. Yes, Spongebob could be incredibly annoying, and disliking him was one thing – savage hostility and resentment that was expressed so consistently, even sans provocation, was another. While there was no excuse for his behavior, there was a reason.

An obvious reason would be how persistent Spongebob was – not only could his personality be entirely grating, but he also didn’t always know when to quit. He could be sort of oblivious and had trouble distinguishing boundaries. If someone was already cross with him and he kept on pestering them, it would only cause more issues. He had improved over the years, but he still had work to do in that area.

There was a deeper reason than that, however.

Ironically, Spongebob reminded Squidward of himself; everything he’d been taught to hate within himself. While perhaps difficult to believe, it was the truth – he had once been similar to Spongebob. He had once been unashamed in feeling and expressing enthusiasm and exuberance. While he did still hold passion for things, he forced himself to taper a lot of his excitement.

His mentor had been Squilliam Fancyson III. They’d dated back in college, and Squilliam refused to be seen with Squidward if he acted in what was considered an ‘embarrassing and uncool’ manner. No longer was he allowed to jump for joy – instead, he had to construct a pretentious and ‘adultlike’ persona. He could not enjoy things that were deemed as childish or lowbrow. He was not allowed to do ‘cringeworthy and immature’ things such as talk loudly with excitement over something, hop about in delight, or act in any way that wasn’t cool, collected and sophisticated. If he did anything of the sort, he’d be reprimanded. He had to be an adult, and adults didn’t show such emotions.

Spongebob proudly flaunted everything Squidward had been forced to conceal. Spongebob was permitted to be juvenile and carefree and jubilant and passionate and energetic and…

Squidward resented it. It roused a lot of negative feelings within him that were extremely hard to deal with, and thusly presented as anger, reinforced by the ingrained adult façade. At the same time, however, he secretly found it refreshing and endearing and… He longed to feel that way again. To break down these harmful ideals and to stop hiding his emotions. To stop hurting people. To be happy again. To live again. Maybe being a kid, a goofball, a wingnut, and a Knucklehead McSpazatron wasn’t all that bad.

Spongebob Squarepants was a good person. He was sweet, kind and caring. He always did his best to help others and prioritized them over himself. He strove to make people smile and brighten up their days. He was talented, entertaining and driven. While naïve and exasperating, he was still lovable – he had flaws, just like anyone else. Underneath it all, Squidward knew that he cared for his neighbor a great deal and was truly grateful for his generosity and devotion… And he really was so sorry for being such a despicable asshole to him. A friend who wasn’t a friend. A loser who didn’t deserve anything he was given. He kept repeating the same mistakes and he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to make up for it. He hated Spongebob, but he loved him too.

That being said, that was all… Mostly… On a platonic level. Going any further than that reactivated his defenses and suppressed those feelings – though to be fair, they were usually suppressed regardless. Romantic was a step too close and it would turn his entire world and everything he knew upside down. Liking him in a platonic way was hard enough to accept – how could he even ATTEMPT to think about anything else? Squidward had denial on top of his denial and it was bundled up in rage and depression. Spongebob was annoyingly immature and he hated him, and those were the facts. He’d never been interested in him and never would be, and those were the facts. He’d always just see him as a moronic coworker and neighbor that he perhaps inwardly appreciated, and those were the facts. It had been this way for many years and it wouldn’t change, especially not from some stupid kiss.

There was no possible way he could feel something like that for someone he despised so much! It made absolutely zero sense. Imagining a relationship with him was nauseating – why would he ever want to spend time with him or touch him or share a bed with him or go on dates with him or ANY of that garbage? If others wanted to, whatever. While he questioned their tastes, it was neither here nor there. As for HIMSELF? Oh no, absolutely NOT. Spongebob’s desires be damned – it wasn’t going to happen. Ever. Not in this lifetime, not in the next lifetime, not in the one after that. Never. He would surely get over his little crush and move on when someone else came along – it wasn’t worth it to make himself queasy by contemplating the notion.

Squidward cried for a good hour, overwhelmed, confused and consumed by the ravenous maw of self-pity. He couldn’t handle this; he wasn’t ready. There were too many things to face… Not only did he have to work through and decipher his feelings with Spongebob, but also his feelings with himself and his past. It was all tangled up in a forebodingly gargantuan, gnarled knot that he had to try to dismantle. There was no sense in getting into it… Spongebob had forgotten about this kiss and he sure as HELL would not be reminding him, ever, at all. It was best to just bury this and never address anything. That way, so long as Spongebob never brought anything up, they could all continue on their merry ways and everything would stay the same and he’d never be required to face that knot.  

The television, left unattended, pulsed with a soft glow, giving off restful background noise. The unintelligible chatter drowned out his heavy-hearted sniffles and sobs – only the blowing of his nose rose above it. By the time he’d exhausted himself, used tissues littered the area and the blanket he’d gotten drooped off of the couch and pooled on the floor near his feet. Everything hurt. The box of chocolate was now empty. He pushed himself up and staggered over to the front door. White flurries greeted him when he opened it, clinging to his shirt as they pleased. He could barely see due to how swollen his eyes had become, but he figured the snow looked deep enough…

He promptly allowed himself to fall facefirst into the pristine drifts.

While Squidward locked himself up at home to brood, Spongebob preoccupied himself by going shopping and seeing Santa after work. This continued for the next couple of days. Staying inside didn’t seem to hold a lot of relief for Squidward – while at least he didn’t have to suffer through going to the Krusty Krab and seeing Spongebob, it was just… Nothing helped. He was miserable for so many reasons. Not even his fuzzy bathrobe, chocolates and foreign dramas were working! Numerous things were tried, but not a single one assuaged him. He eventually decided that he should go outside and get the flow of some fresh currents, even if it was just for a short while…

It was flurrying. Flakes fell gingerly from above, enveloping the vast expanse of the seafloor in a soft silence. Such a silence was almost resounding. The currents rustled some leaves of kelp every so often and animals hid away in their homes. There was a satisfying heaviness in the water. The scenery was truly picturesque and it was… Soothing. Things were still and tranquil… He got a little lost in staring at all of the glowing lights strung on nearby houses. Since he had first made sure Spongebob wasn’t home before he ventured outside, he knew he was safe. He wanted to… Go into town though, maybe. Go shopping. A shopping trip would do him some good, yeah? He could look at art supplies and new clarinets… Yes. Shopping it was. He’d treat himself. Lord knew he needed it. He spent a little while cleaning off his boat and taking in his surroundings. As Squidward slid into the driver’s seat, he prayed he wouldn’t encounter too many lovey-dovey couples lest his fragile mind shatter more than it already had.

The city was hustling and bustling as per usual. Everyone was bundled up, head to toe, to shield themselves from the cold weather. Many folks were struggling under the weight of gifts, hailing taxies for their endless bags of presents. Others seemed to prefer window shopping, and were significantly less burdened. The streets and sidewalks were slushy and wet from snow, and salt crunched beneath many a passerby’s shoe. Christmas decorations were everywhere – lights and garland were hung on numerous buildings and trees, café signs had little gingerbread men and snowflakes drawn on them, and holiday music floated out between the opening and closing of store doors. Squidward headed straight for the music store – perusing the instruments would cheer him right up! It always did! The little bell on the door chimed as he walked in, and the shopkeeper greeted him from behind the counter. “Heyyyy! Zere he is! Squidward, où étais-tu passé, mon ami? It has been three weeks, I was getting worried!” A tired and crooked smile was Squidward’s response.

“Sorry. I’ve been terribly busy – you know how it is,” he said in a low voice, ambling over to one of the display cases, hands in his coat pockets. He’d known Julien for a long time now – he frequented the art and music stores in the area and had familiarized himself with the workers there. He enjoyed their company whenever he went, as they all had good taste and provided interesting conversation.

“Oh, oui, je sais. Ze holidays are always so hectic – it is difficult to get anything done! I am telling you, it is—AH! Squidward – you look terrible! Oh la vache de mer, have you been doing alright?!”

Squidward blinked – did he really look that rough? Yikes, how embarrassing… He’d better cover up some more. He pulled his scarf up to his nose, but not before daring a peek at his reflection in the glass of the case. “… Oh,” he unwittingly said aloud. Yes, yep. Uh huh. Mmhmm. He had absolutely left the house without taking much a look at himself and without making himself even remotely presentable enough for being in public. Why, again? Luckily, his hat covered his wild hair, but his face was an entirely different story. His cheeks seemed more sunken than usual. His nose was red from not only the cold, but very plainly from blowing it so much with how the blotchy color formed around his nostrils. His eyes were the true offender; they were bloodshot as could be and puffy to HELL and back with the skin around the corners being quite irritated. He honestly looked as if he’d been punched more than once. There was a pause as he inwardly panicked, searching for an excuse for his woebegone countenance, before he found an easy one: “… I’m, ah, sick.” Smooth. Nice. It was the easiest and yet the most believable coverup in the book, and it lined up with what he’d told Mr. Krabs! … Not that Julien would know that, but still.

“Zhen why are you out of bed?!” Julien chided, placing his hands on his hips. “You should not be wandering about, exposing yourself to Neptune knows what else! You need rest, not clarinet reeds!”

“I-it looks worse than it actually is, I promise!” Squidward held up his hands defensively. “Listen, I’m fine. I took some medicine and I’ve been in bed for days.” Both statements were actually true. “I’m finally feeling a little better and wanted to go out for a bit.” A lie; more like he wasn’t feeling better and was trying to by going out. Julien scrutinized him skeptically.

“… Hmph. So stubborn, you are. Just remember to look after yourself. Dans ce cas-là, while you are here, were you looking for something in particular?” Whew. Safe. Squidward cleared his scratchy throat.

“Not really… I might buy another instrument soon, though…” Maybe he should try something new. He’d never give up his clarinet, of course, but he wanted to try some other instruments too.

“Oh, oui? Do you know what kind you would like to try?”

“It might be time to get myself something in the piano family. I won’t buy it today – I’ll come back later in the week.” An early Christmas present? Yeah, his mood was improving already! He’d learn how to properly play the piano, and it would be FANTASTIC.

“OH~! MAGNIFIQUE~! Ici, ici! I will show you what I have!” Chirping in delight, Julien pranced over to his customer and tugged him along to eagerly show him the displays.

Meanwhile…

“… And Mr. Krabs wants another pony with saddlebags full of money. I know he got that last year, but he says he wants another. Okay, next, Sandy wants a HP Proliant ML350 G9 server – the uhh, one with Intel Xeon E5-2640 v3 Octa-core 2.60 GHz 16GB DDR4 SDRAM. Whew. That was a mouthful. Okay. Ah, Pearl wants front-row tickets to a Boys Who Cry concert with backstage passes. Larry wants a new—“

“Kid, could ya hurry it up a little? I hate to rush you, but there’s a line.”

Upon being interrupted, Spongebob looked up from his list to a slightly exasperated Santa. “Huh?” He turned his head a little to scan the amount of people waiting to see good ol’ Kris Kringle. “Oh, oops! I’m sorry! I’ll go for today! I made sure everyone already sent their letters to Santa, but I like telling you too, just in case. You got all that, right?”

“Yes, son,” Santa sighed, “I got all of it.”

“Great!! Thank you so much!” Spongebob hopped out of Santa’s lap, pleased with what he’d gotten done. Going through the entire list took a little while, so he’d been visiting the mall every day to see him! He still had gifts to buy too, oh… He really had to get on that! He hustled out of the mall, deciding he wanted to go check out the pet store first and window shop along the way. It was still snowing, but it had slowed down a bit. Something about the twinkling lights made his chest ache longingly.

He began his journey, strolling leisurely with his hands stuffed into his pockets and his eyes trained on every storefront he passed. “Maybe I should drop by one of the music stores in a while to see what I can get Squiddy this year…” Speaking of, he sure hoped he was okay… If not, he’d just have to cheer him up with the Best Christmas Present Ever™! “Ooh~!” Some attractive sweaters in a store window gave him pause, and he halted his trip to admire them. Once done, he resumed his walk, only to repeat the process as he made his way down.

Squidward, on the other hand, had left the music shop to go elsewhere. While pleased with his newfound knowledge of pianos, he now found himself surrounded with the thing he most wanted to avoid…

Love.

The streets were crawling with couples. Advertisements oozed romance and love of all kinds – after all, the holidays emphasized spending time with loved ones. He could visit his mother all he wanted – it was the ads with the kissing and the cuddling and the proposing that bothered him. Not to mention the mistletoe hanging all around – oh Neptune, he was getting flashbacks! He was beginning to grow flustered – his mood worsened with each display of affection he passed. Damnit, there went his progress. He’d anticipated this, but it still felt shitty… He just had to make it to the arts and crafts store. It wasn’t too far away now. He could do this – focus, Squidward! Eyes straight ahead! Think of the doilies! THINK OF YOUR DOILY COLLECTION, SQUIDWARD!

It would soon be apparent that this was the wrong time for a romp in the city.

Up ahead, he spotted someone positively glued to a store window, which at first, he didn’t think much of. They were bouncing on their heels with their hands and face pressed against the glass, making noises of delight and—wait a minute… That outfit sure did look familiar… The colorful teal, yellow and white wool hat, complete with pompom and earflaps… The matching striped scarf that had fringes at the end… The black peacoat that flared out a bit at the waist and went down to midthigh… The maroon leggings and the black snow boots with the straps on the sides… Squidward stopped dead in his tracks, which caused the person behind him to run into him.

“’Ey, buddy! Watch where yer goin’, will ya?” The stranger sneered as he shoved past him. Squidward didn’t have time to retort – he was too busy staring at the figure in front of the toy store. He couldn’t quite see their face as it was smushed against the window. It couldn’t be… Surely not—no, there were certainly others who owned an outfit as such! Still, though – and – oh no. Were those… Blond wisps of hair poking out from under his hat? Without realizing it, he had walked closer, and when the person pulled back enough that he could see their profile, the beating of his heart ceased.

As if that blue couldn’t get any brighter – his eyes were sparkling with wonder and amazement over the humongous tree cleverly adorned with toys in the store’s display. That smile was going to split his damn face in two one of these days. His cheeks were warm with joy, and his long nose nearly touched the glass that was fogged by his visible puffs of breath… To his credit, he had every right to be in awe – that tree was stunning.

Almost as stunning as the person standing before it.

When Spongebob began to pull away from the store, Squidward realized it was more than time to make himself scarce. He frantically ducked into a nearby alleyway, managing to get out of line of sight moments before the other waltzed on past. He watched him leave, probably looking like a total fucking creep as he was peering around the corner of the alleyway to do so, and all he could think about was… Just… Spongebob. Why was it always Spongebob?!

Shopping spree = bad idea. Very bad idea. Back to the house it was.

By the time he got there, Squidward had gone numb. His brain had utterly shut down in exhaustion from the multitude of intense emotions. The lights were left off when he entered his home. He grabbed his Teddy from the couch and brought him upstairs – curiously enough, he’d been clinging to that thing more often as of late… One could only wonder why – it certainly had nothing to do with the fact that it was a gift from Spongebob. It was just a stuffed animal, and stuffed animals were comforting. Right?

After undressing, Squidward lay in bed with Teddy close to his chest, staring at the ceiling vacantly. He could feel no emotion – that could potentially be considered a perk of full mental shutdown.

Spongebob was… Something else. He really was.

He didn’t know what to make of this. He didn’t understand his feelings, he didn’t know what sort of potion he’d drank to cause this, he didn’t know why Spongebob had a crush on him, he didn’t know why everything was throwing him for such a loop, he didn’t know… Anything, really.

Time for sleep. Before long, he’d recover from this, and hopefully forget about it. Spongebob would no longer have to worry about him, and things would go back to normal. With luck, Squidward would bury and forget about this incident. He’d forget he ever felt weird things for Spongebob fucking Squarepants and continue on hating him. Never again would they find themselves under mistletoe while Spongebob was drunk. Squidward would not have to face his inner demons.

… He was going to skip next week’s Very First Christmas™ party. Just to be safe.

[shimmerfall]

Chapter 2: The Early Easy

"...so don't get rid of those heavy coats yet, folks, because even though we've dipped our toes into spring, this cool weather is here to stay for another few weeks..."

While the early morning newscast had been standard enough to treat as background noise, the volume at which the overly peppy weather person delivered their report was somewhat grating on the ears, and no doubt the opposite effect than what was intended by the bubbly demeanor.

Combined with the fact that all of this invasive noise was coming from the downstairs living room television, and had made its way through a purposefully closed door, the bedroom's sole occupant decided this was fate's subtle nudge for him to get his day properly started.

"Typha, come on down, breakfast is almost ready!"

And this, Typha surmised, was his uncle's far less subtle but admittedly more convincing attempt at motivation.

The young man sat up in his bed, blinking his eyes open and letting himself get used to the waking world. Though it was dark, he could still make out a few bits of his room from the scant pieces of light that made their way through his drawn curtains. A few posters lined his walls, and a bass guitar rested against his dresser. His laptop lay near his bed on an office chair next to his bed, and a large vanity mirror hung on the back of his door.

After mentally psyching up for the morning, he rolled out of bed and performed his morning routine of freshening up, then went about getting his backpack ready for school. Once that was finished, he threw on a pair of black pants with a white and blue shirt, and stood in front of the mirror for 'final checks'.

In the mirror, Typha saw a young man of average height. He had voluminous black hair with numerous curls, dark skin, and dark brown eyes. He had a somewhat youthful face, which he had, at one point, attempted to offset by growing out his facial hair. However, he wasn't able to grow either a full beard or a mustache, and ultimately decided that looking young was better than a series of desperate patches on his face.

Satisfied with his appearance, Typha slung his backpack over his shoulder and made his way downstairs. He could see his uncle preparing bacon and eggs in separate skillets over the stove while taking momentary looks back at the television. Typha took a moment to mute the TV, and the lack of volume finally alerted Markus to his nephew's presence.

"Zinniah had to leave early this morning, so you're rolling to school." Markus asked as he quickly placed four pieces of bread in the toaster before returning to his skillets.

'In the damn winter,' he thought, more than a little annoyed that he would have to be in the cold. However, he knew his aunt's job came before his discomfort. "No worries, I planned to anyway," Typha eventually said, leaning against the island countertop and waiting for Markus to finish preparing breakfast.

He wasn't terribly hungry this morning, but he knew the future version of him would appreciate the energy, and the current him would appreciate not hearing another ten minute lecture on the importance of a filling meal to start the day. He was tempted to ask his uncle to drop him off instead, but he'd already said he planned to go on his own. Plus, Typha knew the school was in the opposite direction from the gym where Markus worked, and he could hardly ask the man to inconvenience himself for his sake.

The toaster dinged, and Markus placed them on paper towels before retrieving two slices of cheese from the refrigerator. "Got a couple of loaded grilled cheese cooking, by the way."

"Huh?" Typha responded, as he was currently excavating a large thermal coat from the closet "Oh, uh, sure. Thanks, sounds good."

"Don't you think that's a little much, Ty?"

"Uncle Markus, it's like in the 50's or 60's today. I'm gonna feel the chill in my bones without it."

"Sure you don't want a hot cocoa to help fight off the cold?" Markus teased.

"Seriously? Cuz like, yeah, that actually sounds pretty good."

Markus looked up from washing dishes to give Typha a look. "Boy, shut up before I eat your sandwich."

"No hot chocolate and no breakfast? It's like I'm a common criminal over here." Typha walked to the front door, grabbing a now completed grilled cheese off the counter. "I'll accept this as an offering of forgiveness." Typha strapped on a pair of roller skates and waved goodbye to his uncle before heading out the door, breakfast in hand.

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There's something of an otherworldly quiet to a city early in the morning, long after the nightcrawlers find their way back home, but just before most of the rest of the populace rises to bring life back to the town. Chirping birds heralded the coming of a newborn sun, which bathed the city in an orange glow and offered a thin but effective blanket of warmth against the chill of dawn.

At this hour, the only souls awake to disrupt the peace of the morning do so only out of obligation, such as bakers preparing their goods for the day, radio DJ's constructing set lists for their time block, and delivery boys pelting their neighbors' front doors with the latest local news.

Along with high school students that insist on traveling to school using the halfway point between walking and cycling.

Typha considered this one of the few, almost nonexistent, times anyone could expect relative quiet outside in Brillarville. The only noticeable sound to him was his skates on the pavement as he lazily glided down the street, and the crunching of his grilled cheese as he enjoyed his breakfast.

He appreciated the lack of pedestrians and cars that usually crowded the city, removing the need for him to restrict himself to the designated bike lane, or attempt to weave through throngs of people on the sidewalk. The frigid air was a definite negative, but even borderline frigophobic that he was, even he wasn't as bothered by the temperature as he thought he'd be. Maybe his solo trips to school could restart in earnest sooner than he thought.

The route Typha took this morning gave him a clear view of Mount Seer, the tallest point in the city. The mountain's height was impressive enough, but a different feature made it the infamous local landmark of Brillarville. Two massive, glasslike shards protruded from the top of the landform, each about thirty meters high, with no one knowing how deeply embedded they were into the ground.

A common wager among younger children was to journey up the mountain and write their name on one the shards. Though there was never any proof of this actually happening, or even any indication that anyone ever tried, the rumors of it happening had scared enough parents into convincing the police to cordon off the entrance and put up a sign threatening heavy fines for anyone caught trespassing. Typha himself was never frightened of the place, but he had to admit, looking at the mountain from a distance did give it a kind of ominous aura.

Typha's trek to school took him away from his home on the west side and through a decent portion of downtown. The shift in architecture was gradual but noticeable, as smaller businesses with their names on the front of the store slowly gave way to franchises and massive buildings with no clear indication as to what went on inside them.

Downtown Brillarville wasn't all large buildings of vague purpose. Typha passed several independently owned stores that looked like they belonged back on the west side, but were popular or essential enough to survive the harsher financial demands of downtown.

Coming up on a corner, he stuck his hand out to grab a light post and turn down a new street, where the sight of one of the aforementioned stores, a normally humble looking convenience store came into view.

The owner, Jorge Wellon, sunk a decent amount of money into a high end coffee maker that he stuck at the front of his store, and allowed time combined with man's dependence on caffeine to make him back his investment and then some.

Typha was aware of all of this, and normally wouldn't have looked twice at Wellon's Express. However, while the store was usually fit with the rest of the buildings around it, it stood out harshly that morning. One reason could have been that the inside was still dark so close to its hours of operation, which was a tad bit strange to anyone who paid attention, as Mr. Wellon was very serious about his opening schedule.

Another could have been the obnoxious, brightly colored yellow lizard with a crown sitting atop large, equally bright yellow letters that spelled out "REX" on one of the pale gray building's outer walls.

Typha couldn't suppress a disgusted groan at seeing the artwork. Not for any sort of altruistic stance against graffiti, nor an aching sympathy for Mr. Wellon, despite liking him enough to wish another building had been tagged instead. No, Typha had the distinct honor, accompanied by the distinct headache, of being familiar with this specific piece of modern artwork.

More importantly, with the artist.

Quite suddenly, Typha's casual trip to school became far more energized, and filled with sharp purpose. Sharp, annoyed purpose.

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Students were already filtering into the building by the time Typha skidded to a stop on the sidewalk leading to the school. However, he knew his target well enough to know there was little chance they had already made it inside. He took a seat on a bench near the front doors, and switched his skates with a pair of shoes from his backpack.

Typha expected he'd have to wait until the attendance bell rang before handling his current situation, but that time table was cut thankfully short as he saw a shaggy looking student wearing a red beanie and a large gray hoodie ride a skateboard towards the school. Typha rose to meet the young man, who did not seem to be slowing down as he approached.

"Yo, Ty, brake me bro!" the young man shouted as he barreled towards Typha.

Who promptly sidestepped the incoming teenager, allowing him to ram into a metal handrail. The skateboarder impacted with a ringing thud, laying crumpled over the rail for a few seconds as he recovered from having the wind knocked out of him.

"Morning, Rex," Typha said as the skater removed himself from the rail.

After a few coughs, Rex responded. "What the hell, bro? Didn't you hear me ask you to stop me?"

"All I heard was the sound of someone who needs to remember how to skate safely. And don't call me Ty."

"Come on, yo, don't be lame—"

Typha held his hand up to interrupt Rex. "I saw what you did outside of Wellon's place."

"Yo, you came to school on skates today? Why didn't you hit me up, we could've come together." Rex was interrupted again, this time by Typha pulling his beanie down over his face, followed by slapping Rex's forehead.

"What the hell's the problem, dude?!" Rex asked, pulling his beanie up.

Typha pinched the bridge of his nose before answering. "You tagged the store with your signature."

The skater looked puzzled, not yet understanding what he'd done to earn a head slap. "Yeah, it looks sick, so what?

"Dumbass, your signature is your real name."

Rex at least had the awareness to look sheepish at this point, rubbing the back of his head. "Okay, so I was in a hurry right? Like I had to go quick cuz I'd been at Tiffany's, and the folks were gonna freak if I came back too late again. And I was, like, havin' a block, ya know, I wasn't feelin' anything special. So I just went with what I know the best. And yo, you gotta admit it was pretty clean, right?"

"Yeah, that's another thing," Typha said. "Why Wellon's place at all? There's tons of space down by the levees, and more than enough buildings not owned by people who know who you are."

"But Wellon's is freakin' prime real estate, dawg." They both began making their way into the school as Rex continued explaining. "People always go by that place, no better way to let the streets know who they belong to."

Typha let out an exasperated sigh. "This is a busy city, Rex. No one pays any real attention to stuff like a bit of graffiti on the side of a shop. And the only people who will notice are people who want it gone."

"...Alright, his old lady got all pissy cuz I rode my board inside the place a couple days ago, but that's like, only half the reason."

"I'm gonna say this once, because I didn't think it ever needed to be said," Typha began, placing a hand on Rex's shoulder. "If you wanna mark up a bunch of buildings, go crazy. Turn the city into your canvas, I don't care. But don't do it alone, and I know you did it alone, because Rico wouldn't have let you sign it with your name. And especially don't do it using the same tag you use in videos you put on the internet."

"Oh shit, that reminds me, we still good for this Thursday?" Rex asked, "Rico said there's this sick spot on the north side, perfect for a shoot."

"You..." Typha stared at Rex's face, who was clearly waiting for an answer and seemingly completely oblivious to his warning. "...Yeah. Yeah, I'm good for it."

"Nice. Hey, I'll catch you later man, I gotta head to class. Stay chill, dude." Rex took off down the hall to his first period, leaving Typha alone to reflect on where things went wrong during that conversation.

Eventually deciding he did everything correctly, Typha headed to his own first class of the day.

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The bell for the second half of the day's classes sounded down the halls as Typha entered the library. His first period for the afternoon was an independent study hall, which was the school's way of offering its senior students time in the day to consult with career counselors, work on final semester projects, or continue progress on any other school related endeavors.

In practice, most students used it as a mental break from the rest of the school day, wandering the halls or spending time on the grounds outside. The only caveat to this setup was the unspoken but heavily implied warning by the administration of "don't make us regret letting you do this", which most seniors had the sense to heed.

Typha would often take this time to find a quiet corner of the library to catch up on sleep and risk missing his last class of the day, having eventually come to an understanding with the school librarian that her jurisdiction should be a place to enjoy both literature and relaxation. Today, however, he wasn't feeling particularly tired, so he decided to partake in the fulfilling and worthwhile pastime of mindlessly browsing the internet until the bell rang.

Easily finding an open computer, Typha logged on and let the muse of the internet take him, which simply meant he didn't have a clear objective and would just look at whatever was popular. The school blocked social media websites for the most part, but they didn't restrict access to VidMeo, a popular video sharing website. Something about ease of access for teachers, but whatever the reason, it was a good time waster. Once on the site, he scrolled through some of the trending videos, but they were either ones he'd already seen, or seemed completely uninteresting.

As he was scrolling, his eyes caught a video of an interesting news report titled 'Multi-Million Dollar Company Faces Scrutiny in Wake of Attack'. The video's name was indeed one that piqued curiosity, but the fact that a video from a local news station in Michigan was able to reach the trending page the same day it was posted was unique in and of itself. With nothing better to do, Typha clicked on the video to see what about it was so special.

Pressing play, Typha saw a group of men in blue uniforms, the sight tickling something in the back of his mind that he couldn't quite place. Eventually, the men came upon another guy in a white lab coat, who pulled something out of his pocket, then tossed it at the men in uniforms, who spasmed and fell over.

"Authorites and eye witness reports say," the news anchor voice over said as the scene changed to a close up of the lab coat man's hand, "that the suspect used this strange device to incapacitate the Jury members you see here. When questioned about the device's origin..."

Typha paused the video, staring intently at the disc shaped device in the attacker's hand. Almost unblinkingly, he looked it over, taking in every detail he could before he allowed his mind to go anywhere that would lead him to disappointment.

'Same basic design,' Typha thought, 'and from what I can tell, same shape. But there's nothing engraved on it. Plus, he's holding it bare handed. It's definitely based on the real thing, but it's gotta be fake.' He zoomed out of the video and allowed it to play again. He noticed a bit more information elaborating on the event, particularly about Greensly himself.

"Huh," Typha said quietly to himself, reading out Greensly's former place of work from the scrolling news banner. "Verbradyne..."

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Absolutely forgot to put the link for this shillfest in the last one, but better now than never. If you read any of this, thank you for your time. Much, much, much more to come.

https://www.wattpad.com/user/GranShine