#chat is it normal for the microwave to do this

[todayisafridaynight]

Government mandated masato posting time

[hyperobsessedd]

Joost Klein x Reader hcs

Joost x gn!reader

Summary: just a lot of very fluffy and general hcs about dating joost

This is my first real post on the account so I’m lowkey scared but here we go

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

You and joost first met at a coffee shop

It was late at night when he walked in, you were alone working on something and he had came to edit a music video

You were in a cozy little corner that had a couple pillows and he sat next to you and started talking to you

You guys talked for hours before realizing that it was ten minutes before closing

He offered to walk you home and continued to chat with you

Before getting to your building you gave him your name and number

It’s been about 9 months since then and he asked you out on month 3

Even though you two have conflicting schedules he always try’s to make time for you

He’s very loving but sometimes that can turn to clingines

He loves to cuddle and just like to touch/be around you

It’s always a struggle trying to get out of bed in the morning because no matter the weather that man will always be hugging you in his sleep

Sometimes in the middle of the night he’ll turn around and bring you with him

Both of you love listening to music even if the genres each of you like are very different

If you guys have time before bed you’ll show each other different songs and artists each of you like

Even if it isn’t your cup of tea you’ll always try to listen and try to find things you like about the song

He isn’t the best cook but he trys

A couple of weeks ago he tried to be romantic and have a date night

He attempted (keyword attemped) to make your favourite pasta but the noodles ended up overdone, the sauce was starting to separate, and the side salad he made had way too much dressing

You got home to the sight of him sweating, covered in sauce, and his glasses halfway down his nose

You tried to be supportive by trying the pasta by itself and the salad (the pasta tasted burnt and wet at the same time and the salad wreaked of Italian dressing)

It’s safe to say he hasn’t even gone near the stove since the incident, instead he eats microwave meals and uses the air fryer if he feeling fancy

He still loves doing things for you whether that be reaching for a plate on the top shelf or buying you everything you touch and glance at

His tall stature comes at both an advantage and a disadvantage

Whenever he wants your attention he’ll take whatever you're doing and either hide with it or raise it above your head until you start paying attention

But if he has to use your car or something adjusting the seat will take forever and be very uncomfortable

One of his favorite activities is bothering you in many ways like poking at you, asking you dumb questions, repeating your name multiple times and saying never mind when you answer him, the list goes on

The only way to get him to stop is just ignoring him, it may take long but the outcome is so worth

“Honey, sweetie, pretty, baby, hello can you hear me?” “Why are you ignoring me? You’re so mean” he says with the cutest pout on his face

He looks at you like a kicked puppy when you start to laugh at his reaction

“This isn’t funny I don’t why you’re laughing”

You shake your head and continue to work

His fashion sense is amazing tbh

Sometimes each of you will dress each other for different events or even just pick random outfits when y’all are bored

Having little fashion shows is always very fun because he’ll do his best strut and model face

Having him walk in some heels you found at a random thrift store I’d always super funny

He tries to do his normal confident walk but the heels make him look like he’s about to break his ankles

Self care nights/day are a normal part of your routine that he occasionally like to join in on

Using sheet masks, lip masks, eye masks, and clay masks and Joost is always very funny

“What are you doing and why does it feel so cold?”

“It’s just a sheet mask don’t worry” you smooth out the little dents in the mask before opening a lip mask, putting it on his pink lips

“Now what’s that” he mumbles

“It’s a lip mask now shut up and let me take care of you”

He also loves taking showers with you

Not even in a sexual manner, just being next to you under the warm water is super comforting

He loves scrubbing your back with whatever your favorite body wash is and vice versa

If you like to bake he will always gobble up whatever you make

If you have a signature dessert trust he will be asking you to make it every so often, especially after he finishes a tour

Same thing goes for cooking but making food for him is much more dangerous

He will eat whatever you put in front of him immediately and gladly ask for seconds

He absolutely loves everything you make and he isn’t picky about anything when it comes to you

After eating he’ll help you with cleaning and drying the dishes

After everything around the house is done you get to bed and joost immediately stops whatever he’s doing

You start to worry about whatever he’s thinking “what, do I have something on my face?”

“No, you just look beautiful is all” he looks at you in awe

Before you pass out he whispers his “I love you”s before continuing to caress the top of your head and your stomach

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

Hope you liked it! I’m always open to feedback and suggestions

pic isn’t mine I got it from pinterest

Reblogs and notes are greatly appreciated

[lowkeyrobin]

Headcanons for mcyt x reader doing a cooking/baking stream together??

I love your writing!!!

<3

ooooo okay okay!!! yes of course bro ; also thank you!! I appreciate it sm 🫶🫶🫶🫶

MCYT ; cooking/baking stream

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, quackity, & foolish gamers

warnings ; language, grease fires

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

you guys were making lasanga

Garfield jokes every five minutes

there's pasta sauce and cheese everywhere

he's constantly screaming to the viewers because you keep slapping him with the lasagna sheets, cooked or dry

"y/n! help! I'm being assaulted with lasagna sheets!"

he stained his shirt with pasta sauce 💀💀

almost set the house on fire bc he somehow left shit in the oven before preheating it

you turn on music halfway through and it turns into a karaoke stream

"CALIFORNIA GIRLS WERE UNFORGETTABLE-"

RANBOO

you were making soup because you found a good recipe you wanted to try

you accidently spilled the broth and covered your legs in it

he cut himself chopping up the celery (very minor cut dw)

"cooking stream? more like we injure ourselves for two hours stream"

"cooking stream? I hardly know her"

very chaotic but very good soup

during the intervals where you guys were just waiting for things to cook, you started a hashtag on Twitter to ask you guys stuff

and you answered them while keeping an eye on the food

afterwards you guys watch TV and eat your food while still streaming

"normalize eating on stream 2024!"

FREDDIE BADLINU

you were making breakfast for dinner on stream

you had to go use the bathroom while the bacon was cooking and left Freddie to tend to everything for less than a minute

and he started a grease fire.

after he got it extinguished he kinda just stood there waiting for you

meanwhile chat was exploding with panic and laughter

"Hey, y/n, I don't think we're having bacon tonight!"

"What the fuck happened???"

luckily no damage to anything other than the meat

the rest of it was really good though, and the stream had enough action for tonight 💀💀

NIKI NIHACHU

you guys were making cupcakes

you dropped like two eggs 💀💀💀 so while she was getting new ones you were cleaning up all the eggshell fragments and the insides

you got the camera to show stream your fucking mess and someone sent a dono saying "butterfingers ass"

the cackling after that 💀

you're able to get them into the oven though

and while you're waiting for them to cook, you watch dance moms and discuss everything wrong with it

commentary youtubers? I hardly know them

she begins making the icing while you pull the cupcakes out to let them cool

10/10 cupcakes they're amazing

you guys had a pride flag theme so lmao

ALEX QUACKITY

you were supposed to be making pancakes as a little challenge

his are literally raw and he put chocolate chips from the freezer straight in them

"that banana isn't gonna help anything"

"how do you know that??"

flour is everywhere. it looks like a war started

you put to much non-stick spray on the skillet and started a little fire

but Alex to the rescue dw

he couldn't even figure out how to use it and almost sprayed himself in the face!

goes on Twitter later to update that your kitchen was completely fine but the underneath of your microwave is a tiny bit melted

you blame him every time after that 💀💀

"my microwave melted a bit because you don't know how to use a fire extinguisher!"

"youre the one who used too much spray!"

chat always sides with you, too 😭😭

FOOLISH GAMERS

you thought making fried rice was a good idea? wrong

he literally has no idea what's happening

"can you make the scrambled eggs for me while I tend to the vegetables?"

"how many?"

"they're literally on the cabinet"

chat clipping every single funny moment too

"is the rice cooker even on? holy shit you left it on warm"

"I thought that meant it was on!"

"dude you've used this thing before, how long did it take for you to cook it?"

"like, forever"

"oh my god"

fried rice 10/10

he's complaining about the vegetables like he didn't have like two hours to say something about different veggies

[phosphorus-12]

Grougal: Wakey Wakey Eggs and Bakey! Qilby: But I'm a vegan. Grougal: Wakey Wakey Vegetables and Sadness.

Qilby: You’re overthinking this. Yugo: You don’t know the appropriate level of thinking, Qilby. What if I’m underthinking?

Qilby: Let’s write Efrim a friendly note, shall we? Dear… Incompetent… Dumbass…

Yugo: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container. Grougal: The cow?? Chibi: What? Adamai: Grougal, W H Y?

Qilby: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Mina >:O language Yugo: Yeah watch your fucking language Chibi: Okay, who taught Yugo the fuck word?! Adamai: 'The fuck word'. Mina: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time Glip: Oh my god they censored it Qilby: Say fuck, Mina. Efrim: Do it, Mina. Say fuck.

Efrim: The saying “it is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission��� no longer applies to Yugo.

Adamai: We should normalize not loving family members. Yugo: You can just say: “I hate my dumb fuck brother, Qilby” or whatever. Talk like a normal person!

Chibi: We might have gotten into a bar room brawl back in the city. Mina: Well, that was entirely predictable. Chibi: One of them punched a gang member. Mina: Qilby? Chibi: Yugo, actually. Mina: Oh, that was going to be my second guess.

Baby Grougal after being born: I woke up and chose VIOLENCE. I WILL COMMIT ARSON AND BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND!!! I AM ANGRY- Yugo: Awwww, you’re so adorable! Give me a hug~ Grougal: Wh-What? nO, yOURE SUPPOSED TO BE SCARED OF ME! TREMBLE BEFORE MY WRATH- Adamai, recording: This is so cute.

Qilby: Why is it so hard for you to believe me?! Glip: … Qilby: Oh, right. The lying.

Balthazar: I hate you sometimes. Qilby: Well according to this picture Mina drew of us holding hands that's not true. Balthazar: Qilby, you drew that. Qilby: It doesn't matter.

Grougal: This should be illegal! Chibi: It is.

Phaeris is casually searching around the room Adamai: Hey Phaeris, what’re you looking for? Phaeris: My will to live. Mina walks into the room Phaeris: Oh, there it is.

Nora: No more making fun of me when I misuse dated cultural references, alright? Are we cowabunga on this? Yugo, sighing: Fine. We're cowabunga.

Nora: Made you all playlists! Nora: Efrim, yours has only heavy metal, and is dark like your soul. Nora: Chibi, yours has sad songs and blues to pair with your crippling depression. Nora: And Shinonome has the ABBA Gold album.

Nora: CHARACTER. FLAWS. ARE. FUCKING. IMPORTANT. Yugo: Me when someone tells me to stop eating mayo packets like they’re gogurt tubes.

Kidnapper: I have your father. Yugo: What? I don't have a father… Kidnapper: Then who just called me a lowlife bitch and spit in my face? Yugo: Oh my god, you have my brother Qilby.

Shinonome: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?? Balthazar: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔 Chibi: Why were you microwaving a lemon??? Balthazar: I read boiling lemons helps cover up up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges) but I didn't own any pots. Adamai: Did you burn an orange too? How??? Balthazar: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔

Yugo: You don't think I can fight because of my height! Chibi: I don't think you can fight because you're in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Qilby can fight in that dress either. Qilby: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.

Chibi: I'm trying to juggle family life and work life but I can't seem to find a balance. What do you suggest I do to keep everyone happy? Yugo, deadpan: Quit your job, kill your family.

Efrim: Five little monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and… Grougal: Was diagnosed with mesothelioma. Efrim: Mamma called the doctor and the doctor said… Qilby: You might be entitled to financial compensation if he or a loved one dies.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Who in the Gotei 13 abuses emojis and how

The Groupchat Crimes of the Gotei-13:

Yamamoto: responds everything with an inscrutable "😎 👍". Announcing your engagement? 😎 👍 Telling him there is a scheduling conflict? 😎 👍 The seireitei is being invaded? 😎 👍 Tonkatasu Tuesday at 6:30 tonight? 😎 👍

Sasakibe: Endlessly persnickety about grammar. Despite having the fact that grammar is fluid and changes with context and what many of the new conventions mean explained to him, a total lack of punctuation to create an informal tone will make him literally foam at the mouth like a rabid boar.

Soi Fon: refuses to relegate fun facts about hornets to the #bugs channel, including unspoilered images of what assorted stings will do to human flesh.

Yoruichi: nudes in the SFW channels

Rose: 🌹❤️🌹 brackets his messages with emoji chains like quotation marks 🌹❤️🌹

Kira: vent posting/generally being a miserable little shit in the general channel

Retsu: consistently forgets to spoiler medical gore, keeps sharing medical "Fun" facts that give people nightmares.

Isane: "Hey guys, I need some advice on how to deal with *insane situation literally nobody that ever experienced before*"

Hanataro: unironically posting scorpions and venomous snakes to the cute animals channel

Shinji: ti xif ton lliw/tonnac dna segassem sih lla desrever wohemoS

Momo: crying for real about how cute the animals in the cute animals chat are

Hiyori: destroying things in rage about how cute the animals in the cute animals chat are.

Byakuya: Signs all his messages, as this is is official Gotei-13 correspondence. -from the desk of Captain Kuchiki Byakuya

Renji: no caps no punctuation no worries

Komamura: spent three *months* pretending to be friends with a pair of rural veterinarians and getting people emotionally involved in the saga of them trying to cure a mystery chicken affliction before finally ending his shaggy dog story with an ATROCIOUS pun.

Iba: unappealing thirst traps.

Shunsui: keeps falling for and linking obviously false clickbait articles.

Nanao: digging up literally decades-old drama

Tousen: setting his text color to match the background color to fuck with people.

Shuuhei: normal messages sent from bizarre locations "-sent from the secret downstairs microwave" "-sent from the captain general's iPhone" "-sent from Massachusetts"

Matsumoto: 💕 Putting ❤️ emoji 💋 between ❤️ every ��� word ❤️ for 💋 the ❤️ aesthetic 💕

Hitsugaya: 2AM post @ing everyone of a single inscrutable emoji such as "🦆". Claims to have no memory of making this

Kenpachi: ALL CAPS LOCK ALL THE TIME NO PUNCTUATION ALSO FIGURED OUT HOW TO MAKE THE YELLING BUTTON LOUDER

Ikkaku: figured out how to use image-editing software specifically to make bespoke image macros at astonishing speed so he always has a meme on hand, including the infamous Zaraki Caused Another Bisexual Awakening Counter aka "GOT ANOTHER ONE LADS!!" meme.

Yumichika: ✨ 🦚 ✨ Worst 💙 possible 🪩 combination 💙 of 🪩 Rose 💙 and 🪩 Matsumoto 💙 quirks ✨🦚✨

Yachiru: Pink Text

Mayuri: immediately silenced all notifications from the Groupchat, forgot it exists

Nemu: Tracks Groupchat statistics and presentation them quarterly like a thesis defense and/or stockholders meeting.

Urahara: keeps finding obviously false clickbait articles to send to Shunsui

Ukitake: you can directly track how much Percocet he's on by how colorful, emoji 🤣 filled and ✨ WhImSiClE 🐟 🐟 hIs 💻 TeXtInG 💻 sTyLe 🐟 🐟 GeTS ✨

Rukia: signs her texts like Byakuya, but "-sent from Lieutenant Rukia 🐰 Kuchiki "

Harmless, until somehow her medical records appear under "Rukia Usagi Kuchiki" like she has a middle name.

[imraespace]

LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE ─

─ WITH RIN ITOSHI !!

The only energy you have to leave your bed is when your food has arrived and of course the safety of your roommates!.. Mostly the food to be honest.

Finally, you left your room for the first time that evening and greeted your friends at the front door.

Seishiro was the first to enter, his own bag followed with a plastic bag. Reo was the second to enter, but only with his bag.

"I don't wanna sound greedy but.. is that all the food?" You asked, taking it out of his hand.

The duo walked passed, with Reo starting up a conversation.

"That's food from Chigiri to you. We're gonna bathe and then buy the sushi. Oh right.." He ended his sentence on a cliffhanger, causing you to turn in his direction and saw that he turned around and began to loom over you.

"Oh-"

"IF you want sushi as well, you have to come as well." He stated.

Of course, a frown was formed on your face.

"But.. I don't wanna leave.." You grumbled. He knows you don't want to but he's using your OWN request to his advantage.

"Oh well no sushi." He simply said then began to walk away into his bedroom.

"REOOO." You whined. He didn't listen to you, shutting his door to show you that he won't change his mind.

You stared at at his door for a bit then at the food Hyoma made for you.

"I wanna eat this.. But I also want sushi.." Thoughts began to flood your mind and then..

While the boys were bathing, you calculated how much sleep you obtain if they didn't get distracted. You also narrowed out the pros and cons. Pros are, you get food and you can prove to Reo that you do in fact leave the house! Cons are you're leaving the house. In the end, you sucked it up, got ready, placed your already made food in the microwave, and sat on the sofa, waiting for your roommates to finish their bath.

Reo came out first, and followed behind him was Seishiro. A smirk made its way on Reo's face as his eyes landed on your figure.

"So? What are you gonna do?" He spoke up.

You rolled your eyes. Standing up and chose to ignore his targeting words while making your way out of the house.

"Wow she's actually joining us," Sei added. The boys looked at each other and then chose to join you.

"She only did it for the food that's all." Reo ended the conversation at that point.

It was around 8 something when you three decided to take a small stroll to the nearby sushi takeout. The scenery, for one, was your only favorite part of leaving your home.

Maybe even the small breeze that hits your face once in a while adds into it. The street lights, and the soft sound of cars passing by while a few other teenagers walk by create a comforting feeling that brings a small smile to your face.

"Maybe I'll leave the house once in a while." You mumbled. Reo shared a shocked look with Sei as they both stopped walking.

You realized that you were currently walking alone so as a normal habit, you too, stopped walking and turned around to face them.

"What's wrong?" You questioned their odd behavior.

Reo, per usual, was the first to speak up.

"Nothing.. You just said something out of character.." He pointed out. Sei nodded, agreeing to his words.

You rolled your eyes at their teasing remarks and returned to your journey to the sushi place, ignoring them, mostly Reo, as they ran to catch up behind you chatting up a storm and creating their own make-believe of you "finally doing something".

It was short, but sweet, and thankfully, you three made it to the place. Reo stepped up to stand and neither of you complained nor batted an eye. Both you and Sei sat and waited for Reo to return with the food.

Seishiro made himself at home and pulled out his phone, playing whatever game that's on his screen, completely forgetting that you were next to him.

You sighed and decided to look around the restaurant, admiring the decoration and the people already seated, either eating or meeting up as they got ready to leave after obtaining their meal.

You heard the door reopened and heard footsteps passing by.

Out of curiosity, you craned your neck a bit to find out who had entered the building.

The mysterious person had his height for sure, not to mention such a cold look on his face. A small pout formed on your face as you realized he had a way prettier set of eyelashes than yourself. "Show off.." You instantly thought.

But when his eyes connected with yours all thoughts had immediately left your head. The small rush of blood to your face was simply out of embarrassment.. and the sped-up beats in your chest were a part of that. Of course it is, so that's why the moment you both locked eye contact for a few seconds, you looked away.

But the eyelashes.., the cold stare.., that oddly pink hair, it won't leave your mind alone.

Is this how the characters in that book you're reading feel? That excitement they always describe, how everything feels right in the moment.. Is this what you're feeling right now..?

Seishiro took notice to your weird behavior and looked up from his phone and saw him.

A small pout was formed almost in an instant on his face, it made your pink moment pop immediately.

The person who you were fawning over just a minute ago noticed your friend and a small hum was let out. Behind him was another boy, slightly tanned than the one infront. They stopped at the table for a bit, almost wanting to say something but the tanned one simply said:

"Good luck at the game, you all need it." with a devilish smile.

Seishiro just shrugged his shoulders at the small taunt.. which is a Seishiro thing to do but he threw shade at YOUR friend..

So.. never mind about that moment. Your heart eyes turned into nonexistent. Butterflies in your tummy? Nah that was just the gas. There was no love at all in your eyes. That book is just messing you up.

If someone could be mean to Sei, you don't want it. Now you're gagging at the thought of thinking about him.

"Reo needs to hurry with that sushi.." You mumbled.

SAE ITOSHI (18) :

For reasons, you dislike him. But would you dislike him forever?

RYUSEI SHIDOU (18) :

For reasons, you dislike him. But would you dislike him forever?

1 // 3

TAGLIST!!: @deezy12299 @kuroronana (OPEN)

-`♥︎´- for this story, i'm trying a something new, which includes words/phrases, foods and hometowns from japan and germany. if there's any errors please point it out !

-`♥︎´- word count : 885

[yourimagines]

Hi can you do one for andrew garfield where he is friends with one of his ex girlfriend. And yn is super uncomfortable with that

I hope this is good enough for you

Uncomfortable

* English is not my first language I apologise

* Triggers: Angst, Angst, Angst and some fluff

Y/N POV

“Love, the guys asked if I wanted to go out with them, can I go?” Andrew walked in, wearing a black shirt and some dark blue pants. Looking like a god. “Yeah sure.” He smiles and kissed my cheek. “Thank you, I made some dinner for you, it’s in the fridge.” He opened his closet and grabbed his dark blue jacket. “I’ll go then, call me if you need something.” He walks over, planting a kiss on my head. “I will, have fun.” “Thank you love, have a lovely evening yourself.” I smiled at him as he walks back downstairs. I heard him grabbing his keys and left. ‘Let’s watch that Christmas movie.’ I hopped of the bed and grabbed a cosy blanket and dragged it downstairs. I throw the blanket on the sofa and warmed my dinner in the microwave. ‘He always thinks about me.’

I was enjoying my alone time when my best friend texted me. ‘What does she needs now?’ I groaned and opened our chat.

Bestie❤️💋: hey, I’m sorry but you need to see this

Bestie❤️💋: sent a video

I clicked on the video *the gif where he is hugging Emma* My heart scattered as I saw them hugging each other. ‘Why does he hangs out so much with his ex.’

Bestie❤️💋: It’s all over the internet, I thought you should know, I’m sorry

Me: is this from today?

Bestie❤️💋: yes a fan saw him today…

Me: thanks for telling me

Bestie❤️💋: always, call me if you want to talk okay?

Me: yeah I will.

I lay my phone down and rubbed my face. ‘I don’t like this…’ I sighed and stopped the movie that was still playing in the background on the tv. ‘Maybe I’m overreacting, Emma moved on and so is Andrew they are just friends. It’s totally normal…right?’

I was in our pool, swimming my thoughts away when Andrew came home but he wasn’t alone… Emma was with him. “Love?” I heard him calling me as I saw him through the window walking in our house with Emma. “Love are you home?” I ducked away, hiding myself in the pool while watching them. “Maybe she’s out?” “No… she would have called me.” She smiles. “Maybe she’s to the store quickly..” he shook his head. “No she still would have texted me if I needed something from the store.” Andrew rubbed his face. “I’m going to check upstairs, I’ll be right back.” She nods and he walks away. She looks around our kitchen, smiling at some pictures. ‘I understand why he spends time with her, I mean look at her.’ “She not upstairs…” Andrew looked a bit stressed. “Maybe she’s at the indoor pool.” ‘Shit.’ I silently crawled out of the pool and run into our sauna. “Love? Are you here?” I heard him pushing the door further open, entering the pool area. “Love?” I peeked out of the sauna, a fake smile on my face. “Hi, you’re back.” He smiles and walks over. “I was worried about you my love, I couldn’t find you.” “Sorry I guess.” He kissed the top of my head. “No it’s okay my love.” He turns around and smiles brightly at Emma. “I found her.” She smiles and waves at me, I returned a friendly wave back. “Emma needs a place to stay for tonight, she had a fight with her boyfriend. I hope you don’t mind she can stay here in our guest bedroom.” ‘Yes I do mind! She’s your ex Andrew!’ “No of course she can stay.” He smiles and quickly kissed me. “Thank you darling.” I smiled but felt a bit uncomfortable with it. “I’m going to prepare the guest bedroom for her.” He said and walked over to her. “Let me show you your room for the night, miss Stone.” She giggles and nods. “Show me the way mr Garfield.” They both walked upstairs as my face fell. ‘His ex is in our house…’

I went to bed as they stayed downstairs. ‘Can’t believe this, he would be angry if my ex was here.’ I scoffed and got in bed, wrapping the blanket up high to my chin. ‘They are perfect for each other, maybe they finally realised they are meant to be.’ I heard them laughing together and I covered my ears, trying to cancel out the noises. ‘I don’t wanna hear it…’ as tears slowly fell down my cheeks.

Andrew POV

“Okay that’s enough for me tonight, if you don’t mind I’m going to join my girlfriend.” “Of course Andrew.” She smiles at me as I stood up. “If you need something just knock on the door.” “I will, thank you and Y/N for letting me stay tonight.” “No problem, we have the space.” “I’m still thankful for it. She so lovely, I understand why you adore her so much.” I shyly smiled “you do?” She nods as she stood up as well. “Yes of course, I adore her to be honest, she’s always so kind to me.” I smiled at her. “She is kind.” She nods and smiles at me. “But I’m also heading to bed, it was a dreadful day today for me.” “Yes of course, it was a rough day for you.” I locked all the doors and together we walked upstairs. “Well good night Emma.” “Good night Andrew.” I entered my bedroom and closed the door softly behind me. I saw her laying completely under the covers, hiding herself. I smiled and pulled off my shirt and pants. I carefully slipped next to her in bed and moved under the covers. Something wasn’t right as she lay so still with her back turned to me. “Love?” I whispered as I wrapped my arms around her waist, as I did that I moved closer to her, seeing her wet cheeks. “My love, what happened.” I immediately wiped away her tears as she ducks into my chest, breaking down. “Darling…” I kissed her head and rubbed her back as she sobbed into my chest. “I’m here, darling it’s okay.” Her fingers pressed into my bare skin as she held me close, afraid I would leave her. “It’s okay.” I kissed multiple times the crown of her head as she wet my chest.

She calmed down a bit but tears where still falling now and then down her cheeks, I immediately wiped them away if I saw them running down her face. “Love… what made you so sad.” “Do you love me?” Her voice sounded hoarse and broken as she asked me an question that hurt me. ‘Do you love me…’ “of course I love you my love.” ‘ I neglected her, she doesn’t feel loved, she probably doesn’t want me anymore…’ she sniffs and nuzzled her head to my collarbone. “Y-You don’t feel loved? You feel like I don’t love you?” I went with my fingers through her hair, scraping her scalp. She carefully looks up, she’s cried a lot as her beautiful eyes where bloodshot and swollen, Her cheeks were glossy and the tip of her noise was red. “I don’t know.” My heart broke in million pieces. I carefully cupped one side of her face, wiping the new tears away. “My love, I’m so sorry you feel like I don’t love you enough…but believe me I’m deeply in love with you.” She looks away and a single tear fell down my cheek. “Please tell me, why you feel like this…it pains me to see you like this…darling.” My voice cracked as my eyes became watery. Her lip trembles and started to fidget with my other hand. “I-I… I think you’re still in love with Emma.” “Emma?” She nods and hides her face in my neck, feeling ashamed of herself. “Darling, don’t hide yourself please, don’t be ashamed.” I slowly pulled her away from my neck. “Look at me..” my lip trembled as tears run down her cheeks again. “I’m in love with you, I want you. You’re the one I want… I’m sorry if I made you feel like this..” tears were falling down on my face. “I’m only trying to be a good friend and I didn’t realise that I hurt you… I’m sorry” she wraps her arms around me, hugging me and I cried into her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

She went with her hand through my hair, trying to calm me down. “Please don’t leave me, I’m sorry.” “I’m not leaving you.” Her voice was muffled as she kissed my head. I pulled her closer to me, holding her a bit firmer. “I’m sorry love.” I looked up at her, her beautiful eyes looked at me and smiled sadly at me. “I’m sorry as well, I just… I just felt so uncomfortable with you being so close with her and she’s so perfect for you and…” I kissed her softly, shutting her up. Her hands moved to my shoulders, softly squeezing them as I deepened the kiss. “Baby your perfect, I promise I only want you.” She shyly smiles. “Really?” I nodded and wiped some hair out of her face. “Really, you’re so beautiful, even when you are covered in tears.” She cracked a smile. “I’m sorry I didn’t think about it, that it could make you uncomfortable.” “I’m sorry as well for making you sad.” I shook my head. “No don’t apologise for this, never apologise for sharing you feelings with me.” She grabbed my hand that lay on her cheek. “I love you Andrew.” As she softly squeezed in my hand. I smiled at her and placed a kiss on the tip of her nose. “I love you darling.” She wrapped her legs and arms around me, cuddling me. “I make sure you’re more happy, I’ll hang out a bit lesser with her, even tho she totally adores you.” Her head peeked up. “She does.” “Yeah she’s bugging me for awhile now when I’m going to ask you to be my wife.” I said with a awkward chuckle. “She needs to bug you more then, I’m waiting for awhile now.” I laughed and hugged her close. “You have to wait a little bit longer my love but I promise I will ask you but not now, you deserve way more better than this, here laying in this bed after we cried.” She giggles against my chest. “I can’t wait then mr Garfield.” “Me neither soon to be mrs Garfield.”

[harrywavycurly]

Sarah I love killers love!! I love how he just drops everything to answer the phone when we call🥰🥰 I was wondering if it would be ever so possible to get some more of that? Like the conversation kinda things you do!😍😍

Hiii babes!! Awe I’m so glad you like the series!! Of course I can give you some little convos where Eddie answers the phone while he’s “busy” with something/someone as well as when he just drops anything to talk to you in general 😂 I hope you enjoy!💖

CW: Eddie is a serial killer

-find all things A Killer’s Love here✨

“Hey baby what’s wrong?” “Why does something have to be wrong? Why can’t I just be calling my husband because I miss him?” “Sweetheart it’s…eight thirty at night on a Tuesday so normally by now you’d be tucked into bed with a book…so what’s wrong?” “I want some tea and…I can’t find my favorite mug…” “give me one minute baby I’m gonna mute you okay? I gotta talk to Rick really quick.” “Okay honey tell him I said hello and sorry for interrupting poker night.” “You don’t need to apologize sweetheart but I’ll tell him you said hi…….listen up my wife is on this phone and if you so much as breathe a little too loud and she hears you I’ll make this the most painful night of your like you got that? And I really don’t want to tape your mouth shut because it’s such a waste of tape but I will…now….just let me tell her where her mug is and then we can get back to our little chat okay? Nod your head if you understand…Good……sorry about that baby.” “It’s okay so…do you happen to know where-” “top shelf in the cabinet left of the microwave…that’s where your pink mug with the smiley faces on it is.” “Oh god you’re the best..I love you.” “I love you too Princess I’ll be home in….an hour or so depending on how much money Rick is willing to lose tonight…” “be gentle with him honey.” “I’ll try my best.”

“Why won’t you just be still? It doesn’t hurt as much when you’re not wiggling around like a worm on a hook….wait one moment my wife is calling…sorry I hate gagging people but I can’t risk you yelling or anything so…here we go….hey baby.” “Hey honey! So I’m standing in the kitchen and I have no idea what to make for dinner tonight and I also can’t find the remote to the tv.” “Okay well the remote is next to the coffee pot that’s where you left it this morning when you turned the news on while getting ready for work…now for dinner what are the options?” “You really do just keep track of everything…uhm let’s see the options are…spaghetti with meatballs…I can make meatloaf with mashed potatoes and green beans or….uhm well that’s all I’m in the mood to make so those are the options.” “Spaghetti sounds great sweetheart….one moment baby I gotta help someone with their head gear.” “Oh yeah go help them honey! Safety first!” “Yeah safety first……you were doing so good and now…now I have to use the tape and I fucking hate using the tape………don’t look at me like that I told you to just be still this is all your own fault now I’ll be right back….hey baby…so does spaghetti sound good to you?” “Yeah that sounds great I’ll make it enough so you can have leftovers for your lunch tomorrow.” “Perfect…I gotta go but I love you and I’ll be home soon.” “I love you too.”

“Hey sweetheart.” “Hi honey I’m not bothering you am I?” “Not at all I’m just uh..digging some…holes…for Henderson’s mom’s new bushes for her backyard.” “Oh that’s so nice of you to do that….” “What’s wrong? You sound upset.” “Well uhm…don’t freak out okay but I’m…lost?” “Lost?…baby how are you lost in Hawkins it’s not even that big of a city…” “I think I turned left somewhere I was meant to turn right…and now I’m on a street called sir Timothy? I haven’t ever been in this neighborhood before and it’s getting dark and my phone can’t even locate me to tell me how to get home and-” “hey hey it’s okay baby I’ll come and get you and you can just follow me home okay?” “You…you know where I’m at?” “Yes you’re in that new development over by lover’s lake…really nice houses over there…big plots of land too it’s nice.” “When have you been over here?” “On my way home once or twice…I just drove around seeing if it was maybe a place we’d wanna move to eventually.” “Oh…I mean it is…nice over here but I love our house.” “I love our house too…now just sit tight and I’ll be there in a few minutes.” “Okay…I love you…thanks for coming to rescue me.” “I love you too and you know I’ll always come and rescue you…it’s part of the job of being a husband.”

“Honey? Why are you all out of breath? Are you okay?” “Yeah baby I’m fine I just had my phone in my locker at work and had to run when I heard it going off.” “Oh I’m not bothering you during your break am I? I know how much you love your sixty minutes of silence in your truck.” “No sweetheart you’re not bothering me…are you home already?” “I am! That’s actually why I was calling…I was seeing if tonight could be our date night for the week? Since I’m off early and you don’t work tonight?” “Sure we can have date night tonight….I should be home around five.” “Oh perfect that gives me two hours to be a couch potato before I have to start getting ready….” “Baby…” “yes?” “Is that really the only reason you called?” “I might’ve just also wanted to hear your voice…it gets all rough in the middle of the day from you yelling at people to do their jobs correctly….” “Oh and you enjoy that do you?” “You yelling? No but…I do enjoy what it does to your voice…but I’ll let you get back to work.” “Oh you’ve gotten your fill then huh? I’m free to go now?” “Yes you’re free to go.” “Okay well I’ll see you when I get home…if you miss me too much feel free to call me…” “you just want an excuse to get out of working.” “No I just like hearing your voice…I love you baby I’ll see you soon.” “I love you too honey…see you when you get home.”

[xodarling]

Alright hear me out: one whole day of nothing but breeding Silver Wolf. No stopping until it's all but assured she is impregnated.

ARRRRRGGGGHHH gnawing at the bars of my enclosure rn 👹👹

starting in the morning with morning wood, waking up next to a sleeping wolfie with ur pants strained like mad so ofc u do what every sane person and fuck her while she sleeps 🙄🤷‍♀️ u rub her clit a lil bit and start to prep her to take u whole n being extra cautious cuz of the size difference. and once shes wet enough and still so sleepy HEHEEH u take her pants off and press ur tip into her and the stretch waking her up 😭 her sleepily whining and kicking her legs bcuz shes just SAUR CUTE AUUGGHH😭😭 being nice to her cuz she just woke up so u fuck her softly (at first) rubbing her clit while thrustingggg and making each other cum by soft morning sex 😭😭 SILVER WOLFFFUH

but 😨 when u two recover and the day actually starts ur hard on gets worse?? especially having to see wolfie walk around with her hips swaying seeing the way she bends over the counter while she waits for like microwave to finish or sumthin idk not being able to help urself and fucking her over the counter right there 😨😨 her complaining about how horny u r while moaning shamelessly at the pace. one round ends up turning into two then three and then u end up fucking her on every surface in ur house watching her scream, shake, and make a mess everywhere

ending the day with wolfies face pressed against one of the couch pillows with her ass up, a normal position after the many u forced her into to test her flexibility, breeding her one last time and slapping her ass laughing at the braindead moan she lets out😔 she’d look so cute all fucked stupid with an unnecessary amount of cum dripping out her used pussy i cant chat im gonna combust 💔💔

[shesalewa]

Sometimes I stop to look at Dead plate and go. What if everyone. I mean. EVERYONE. Was Normal.

Cause we have a Swap plate and even Manon is insane there, Vincent is still obsessed with Rody and his venture to find a way to taste food again, we have Rody who's still neglecting himself and also still obsessed with the "I need someone to love me to prove I can be loved", Manon... Idk, but stalking another boy while being in a relationship is really weird if you ask me.

Then we have the canon Dead plate and just. just. What if they were all normal cause like— it would be so nice.

By normal I mean:

Rody takes in balance with his girlfriend, and himself, while still being over the moon with Manon.

Manon, getting a breather, and chatting with Vincent and hanging with him cause she can rant to him knowing he is gay.

Vincent, still trying to find a way to get his taste buds to work again but he isn't gonna bite someone's ear off or eat anyone.

Normal! Vincent: OH MY GOD STOP TALKING. ABOUT YOUR GIRLFRIEND. SHE THIS, SHE THAT, HER THIS, HER THAT. GET BACK TO WORK

Normal!Rody: ... Then she walked in on me while I burnt the popcorn in the microwave.

N!Vincent: WHO THE F/CK BURNS POPCORN. NO, HOW DOES ONE BURN POPCORN?!

Later

Normal! Manon: and then he burnt the popcorn and tried so hard not to set the fire alarm off because smoke was everywhere and it's so funny to me.

N! Vincent: why are you telling me this? What's your secret motive?

N! Manon: ... Do you think i should be the one to pop the ring question?

N! Vincent: how the f/CK would I know I've never dated anyone before tf—

Even later

N!Rody: chef!!! Vincent!!! I didn't expect to see you in the mall wanna join me and Manon on a shopping spree?

N! Vincent: No I'm actually here to buy lemon—

N!Rody: well you're coming with us anyways!

N! Vincent: You b/tc—

...

Even laterer

...

N! Vincent: (being fed lemon flavored ice cream by both Rody and Manon) this doesn't feel like 3rd wheeling anymore.

[tangyangie]

karma x chaotic s/o headcanons

— oh god.

— you guys are the definition of destruction. nothing is safe from the grasps of you both. you've probably accidentally broken ten desks before. this definitely earned you a scolding from korosensei.

— you guys skip class together. you do whatever you want to in the moment -- from getting coffee and having a chat, to digging a hole in the ground and trying to escape it by running around in circles until you eventually reach the top.

— he teaches you subjects you struggle with. or, more specifically, tries to teach you. it ends up with seeing who can make the most paper cranes before you realize you accidentally used the homework paper.

— you guys stand up on tables. that's just your regular thing. korosensei yells at you both for doing it. the scolding is ineffective.

— you find animals on the street. they end up attacking you both, but that doesn't stop you from the search for pets. after all, dodging them is easy enough.

— karma tries to find ways to catch you off guard. he will place whipped cream on your head if it means you'll be surprised. he probably does that thing where you're about to sit down and he pulls the chair from under you. little shit

— you guys sit upside down on couches. your head is where your knees would be and your feet are sticking up above the couch. it's just too much fun sitting like that and seeing the people on the tv upside down, so it just became a thing.

— he likes to get messy. if you're ever painting, he dips his hands in the paint and gently puts his hand on your face. baking something? you know damn well he's taking the frosting and smearing it on your mouth. (with love ofc)

— you both recreate random movie scenes. with a little fun, of course. but, let's pretend that during your take of the titanic scene, you didn't accidentally fall into the water ten times.

— you've probably exploded microwaves before. not your fault you didn't know the bowl was metal. and that microwaves don't like metal.

— you guys blackmail everyone else. everyone in the class has a special note in your phones with evidence of everything they've done, including teraseka singing in the shower at full volume. but, your rule is no blackmail on each other.

— you guys go to parks a lot. you definitely end up jumping off of the swings and going on top of the monkey bars. some of the parents might give you looks.

— karma picks you up a lot. over his shoulder, bridal style, normally, any way of picking you up, he does. let's not mention the time he held you upside down by your ankles.

notes: i love this idea!! i probably would've added more but i'm working on something rn and i'm stressing about it

anyways i hope you liked it!!

[thewritersaddictions]

If The Walls Could Talk Chapter 1: We Are All Adults Here

Pairing: DBF!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Pov: Reader

Summary: When your parents leave for their annual summer vacation, they ask your long-time neighbor to come by and check on you.

Warnings: Smut, Age Gap (20/50), a little bit of corrosion, sexual tension, Bj's, PinV, Unprotected sex, Smut with no plot, shower/tub smut.

A/n- @ Firefly-graphics for dividers.

WC- 3.2

If The Walls Could Talk Series // The Last Of Us Master List

With another semester of college under my belt, it’s time to come home for the summer. The group chat with my parents tells me that even years later, they still leave the house for a few weeks during the summer for a vacation. They’re going on a cruise this year and will be gone for nearly a month. 

I’ve lived next to a man and his daughter for years—a sweet kid a little younger than me. Hours were spent playing with her when we were both young, and when I started high school, I began babysitting her, and nothing changed. I was always in his house, and the fact that we were constantly bumping into each other had my crush flying through the sky.  

I had a crush that suddenly disappeared when I was up and moved away to college, but every summer, my crush came back with a vengeance—a spiteful vengeance. The older I got, the more I looked at Sarah’s dad in a new and different light. 

Now I’m driving back home to an empty house and a house right next door with my much older crush. Let’s also add that Joel is also my dad’s best friend. He has been his best friend since Joel moved in with his baby daughter almost twenty years ago. The lights on the house are off, and my garage door opens with one button press. 

The first day back from college was always just about laundry and eating a typical meal for the first time since I had been home for the brief spring break before exams. I can see that Joel is home; his truck is in the driveway, and the kitchen light is on. I text my parents while I wait for my food to reheat in the microwave. 

Made it home, eating leftovers. 

Aww I’m glad you are home sweetie. Don’t forget that if you need anything Joel is right across the street. 

And his daughter is at camp this summer so he’ll be there anytime you need him. 

You can’t just volunteer Joel like that. 

I’ll make sure to remember that Mom.  

I swipe out of the chat a little faster than normal. My attention drifts over to the lit-up kitchen window and I think about whatever Joel might be doing… since Sarah is away at summer camp. The beeping of the microwave pulls my attention away, and the room smells of leftovers. That night I watched a random movie marathon in a bed I’ve had since middle school, and fell asleep with a half eaten plate of food on my nightstand. 

A week later theres a knock on the fence to my backyard. My eyes are closed behind my sunglasses. It’s only when the hot rays of sun fade and turn cold do I open my eyes and shift my eyes down the brim of my nose. It’s Joel. Standing there in all his glory. A hawaiian shirt covers his tan skin, and shorts give very little to the imagination.

With another semester of college under my belt, it’s time to come home for the summer. The group chat with my parents tells me that even years later, they still leave the house for a few weeks during the summer for a vacation. They’re going on a cruise this year and will be gone for nearly a month. 

I’ve lived next to a man and his daughter for years—a sweet kid a little younger than me. Hours were spent playing with her when we were both young, and when I started high school, I began babysitting her, and nothing changed. I was always in his house, and the fact that we were constantly bumping into each other had my crush flying through the sky.  

I had a crush that suddenly disappeared when I was up and moved away to college, but every summer, my crush came back with a spiteful vengeance. The older I got, the more I looked at Sarah’s dad in a new and different light. 

Now I’m driving home to an empty house and a house right next door with my much older crush. Let’s also add that Joel is also my dad’s best friend. He has been his best friend since Joel moved in with his baby daughter almost twenty years ago. The lights on the house are off, and my garage door opens with one button press. 

The first day back from college was always just about laundry and eating a typical meal for the first time since I had been home for the brief spring break before exams. I can see that Joel is home; his truck is in the driveway, and the kitchen light is on. I text my parents while I wait for my food to reheat in the microwave. 

I made it home, eating leftovers. 

Aww, I’m glad you’re home, sweetie. Don’t forget that Joel is right across the street if you need anything. 

His daughter is at camp this summer, so he’ll be there anytime you need him. 

You can’t just volunteer Joel like that. 

I’ll make sure to remember that, Mom.  

I swipe out of the chat a little faster than normal. My attention drifts over to the lit-up kitchen window, and I think about whatever Joel might be doing… since Sarah is away at summer camp. The beeping of the microwave pulls my attention away, and the room smells of leftovers. That night, I watched a random movie marathon in a bed I’ve had since middle school and fell asleep with a half-eaten plate of food on my nightstand. 

A week later, a knock was on the fence in my backyard. My eyes are closed behind my sunglasses. It’s only when the hot rays of the sun fade and turn cold that I open my eyes and shift my eyes down the brim of my nose. It’s Joel. Standing there in all his glory. A Hawaiian shirt covers his tan skin, and his shorts give little to the imagination.

“Your dad told me you were home.” He says plainly. I nod and keep my eyes on him. “You haven’t left the house in over a week, so I came to check on you,” Joel says as he shifts from in front to the side of me, sitting on another pool chair. “I haven’t needed to. You know mom always makes way too much food during the summer.” This is the second summer I’ve come back home, and my parents have been out on a cruise or flying to some destination they picked out the minute they got back the previous summer. “I know she’s always trying to pawn it off to the other neighbors,” Joel says, looking at you and then the water. 

There’s a long pause between us; the tension grows, and before it can well into something, I cut Joel right off at the knees. “Well, I’m sure you’ve got other things to do today.” I say, then add, “instead of checking up on me.” There’s a shift in Joel’s face, but he quickly hides it behind a bright smile. “I do have some yard work I’ve gotta get done.” He says, getting up from the pool chair and pushing with the palms of his hands. 

I watch him walk away. Open and close the fence gate. I stare for a long while. Wondering where the hell these random, hot flashes of feeling came from. The bottom of my stomach burns with a passion that I don’t even feel when I go out with guys from my college. I lick my lips, bring my sunglasses back up the ridge of my nose, and close my eyes. By the time I get back inside, the summer day’s heat has disappeared, and my skin is tanned.

Joel seems to know every time I’m outside. He knocks on the gate and lets himself in. This time I’m swimming in the pool. The heat has suffocated me in a way I’m not used to, “Do you go anywhere else?” Joel asks. I lift my head from the pool surface and look at him. This time, he’s wearing just a pair of shorts. Swim trunks, “It’s not like I have many places to go.” I say plainly before dropping my head onto the pool water’s surface. I feel the ripples of the water as Joel moves in. 

He starts at the steps and makes his way over to me. Long swimming strides, and in a matter of seconds, he’s by my side. Once again, I was standing in the sunlight. I peep my eyes open again. “Do I have something on my face?” I ask him. His brown eyes bore holes into me in a way that made me feel like the only other person on earth but also uncomfortable. “I just hadn’t realized how much you’d grown up.” That is all Joel says before he too, lays on his back. I’m stuck wondering what that means. I had always seen Joel for precisely what he was.

“What does that mean?” I finally ask after a little silence. Joel seems to be forming his words, “It just means that are have become a beautiful woman in the passing years.” My courage starts to grow. “Does that mean you’ve been watching me?” I say, looking over at him. I can see him visibly swallow has if I’ve caught him in a tongue twister. “I… You…” He rolls his lips together, I move in the water. I want to see his face. “I’m what Joel?” My bathsuit hugs me tightly due to the water. “You’re just…” “I’m just what Joel?” I ask brushing my hand up from his belly to his chest. His skin lights up with goosebumps in the hot weather. 

“I’m far to old for you.” He says as if he’s trying to stop himself from making a horrible choice. As if saying he’s older then me is going to stop the way my nails are dragging down the center of his body. Inching closer to the tie of his swim trunks. 

The way my name falls from his lips, like he’s barely holding back his wants and needs. “Y/n, please I’m just as old as your father.” I roll my eyes. “Can you not bring him up when all I wanna do is make you feel good.” I mutter softly. Joel lets go of my hands and groans when I grab at his erection from the swim trunks. It’s just a wet piece of fabric between my hand and his cock. 

“Fuck,” Joel mutters out in a low groan. But before the moment goes any further I move my hand and float towards the pool stairs. Joel is up and moving towards me before I even manager to get the towel around my body. “What in the hell was that?” He tries not to shout. “That’s called payback for the past fifteen years of my life, now if you don’t mind I’m gonna go take a bath,” I say before slipping into my flip-flops and walking into the cool air of the house. I leave the sliding glass door open. 

An open invitation to follow me. 

An open invitation to which he follows like a lost puppy dog following its owner. I don’t hear Joel get out of the water immediately as if he’s waiting for my father (his best friend) to come rounding the corner; all I know is that by the time I’ve settled into the hot water of the bathtub with bubbles on the rim of the tub. Joel is marching up the stairs and not even knocking on the bathroom door. 

He just lets himself in. He is standing with a towel wrapped around his waist and water pooling around his feet. “You’re making a mess, ya know,” I say, not even bothering to look up at him. I had set up most of what I would use before my dip in the pool, my eyes gazing over the words in my romance novel. 

“You’re a fuckin’ tease, you know that.” He says with a grunt. I say anything, flipping the page of my book over. The book goes from my hand to the sink, forcing me to look up at him. “You are a wrong choice waiting to happen,” Joel says with my chin in his hand. Holding me to look up at him, “But I’m not inclined to make the right choices right now.” He says before finally leaning down to press his lips into mine. 

The kiss sweeps me off my feet metaphorically. His lips are rough and dry from the summer heat and sun, but the way he uses his mouth is heaven-sent. Passing over my lips with his tongue, his hand still holds my chin securely, giving Joel all the power he needs in this situation. His other drifts down your chest, and into the water. The bubbles surround his hand as his fingers graze over the tops of my breasts. Gentle has they grope and tease my nipple. The kiss is breathtaking, leaving me gasping for air when Joel finally does pull away. 

When he pulls away there’s no giving away the rather large tent that has made it’s way through the soaked swim trunks and is now protruding through the pool towel. He follows my gaze, and looks down, “You want something?” He asks looking down at me, I nod. “Then undress me sweetheart.” The nickname makes my heart skip a beat, and my hands are reaching out for the towel, ripping it off and through it to the floor. His swim trunks go next and in one easy slip down his toned legs he’s free and completely naked in front of me. For being half my age older the man is built, muscles and tan lines that show the amount of work he’s put into his life already. 

“You gonna keep staring at it with your mouth open? Or are you gonna use that pretty little mouth of yours up to some good use?” He says standing there in all his glory. I slip over the edge of the tub, half my body still sits in the water. My knees hitting the edge of the inner tub, nipples taught at the coolness of the surrounding air as I grab a hold of Joel cock. I had dreams about this, dreams of sucking him off, dreams of holding him in my hands, dreams of the way he’d taste, of the way he’d sound. Nothing is better then the real thing though. The weight of his cock on my hand is different then I’ve ever felt. A strong hand combs through my wet pool hair. “Come on darlin’ don’t keep me waiting.” He says gently. 

I nod because there aren’t words to describe the feelings that are currently wrapping their way around my lungs. I lean forward and press my lips to the head of his cock. I look up at Joel through my lashes before sucking just the head of his cock into my mouth. A slight groan falls from his lips, and it eggs me on further. I take each inch of him with a slow pace, giving myself time to let him fill my throat. I’m not even must more librality because before i know it, th hand that was gently combing through my hair is pushing me further down his cock. My nose buried in his nicely trimed pubic hair. I gag around the tight feeling of his cock in the back of my throat, holding his thighs tightly in both my hands. 

Joel hands holds my hair tightly. The once gentle hand is curled around my hair and using a force I’ve only ever seen him use when he’s lifting things from his truck. Using my throat in order to get exactly what he desires. His grunts and groans are the only things I hear, music to my ears. It’s the little tiny whimper of my name that has me knowing that Joel is close. His cock twitches in the back of my throat and my eyes water at the fullness he has me feeling. 

— 

The water sloshes in the tub, as Joel moves us both into the tub. His back pressed against the cold porcelain. The law tub large enough to hold the both us. He doesn’t have me facing him at first. My back pressed against his chest, with his already stiff cock pressed between my wet thighs. Wet due to water, and due to the fucking my throat as just recieved. Joel plams my breasts. Teasing the stiff nipples between his fore fingers and thumbs. Rolling then and pinching at the same, it has me rockingand sqeuzzing his cock between the plusness of my thighs. 

His lips connect to the side of my neck pressing soft and rough kisses into the skin. Leaving some patches with hickies. “Such a pretty women sitting on my lap.” He mutters against my skin, I let my head fall back over his shoulder and his lips find my chin. “Letting me do whatever i want to her, in her parents house.” His reminder that we are in fact in my parents house has me wetter then I’d like him to know, but my thighs sadly betray me. “Oh she’s a kinky little one isn’t she?” He says, “Spread your legs sweetheart.” He commands and follow with ease, watching as water flows over the edge a little. Suds hitting the floor, with my legs wide open one hands drops my breast and falls down the center of my stoamch and then to the center of my pussy. “Oh she loves the idea of my fuckin’ her right here in this bathtub, she loves the idea of my fuckin’ her in her parents house, what they don’t know don’t hurt ‘em.” He says as he slips two fingers in. Moans bounce of the tiled walls of the bathroom, his one finger are larger then my two fingers put together, so I can only image the way he’ll push my walls open to make room for his cock. He drops his other hands decidind it’s better to play with my pussy then my breast. With one hand pumping in and out of my pussy the other one starts with slow circles around my clit. 

“You’re so wet Y/n, hmm how long have you been thinkin’ about me fuckin’ you?” He asks, his breath steady in comparison to mine, I can barely keep up, i roll my lips together before opening my mouth but all that falls out is moans of satisfation. “Answer me darlin’ or I won’t let you cum.” His words get my attention, and for a second I have to think. “Since I was in highschool.” I manage to get out. “Hmm such a dirty fuckin’ slut thinking about her dads best friend fuckin’ her.” his words have me squeezing his fingers in my pussy. “It’s okay baby, I’ve been thinkin’ about doing this since two summers ago.” His confession sends me over the edge. Into a white hot ecstasy.  Joels fingers slide out with ease, and his other rest gives my sensitive clit a rest. Kissing my shoudler and back gentle as I come down from my high. 

When I regain a portion of my brain I don’t give him much time to ask me many questions. I grab his cock and postion myself. Letting the head of his cock notch at my entrance. “Oh fuck sweetheart” Joel groans out his grip on my hips grows tight. “Wait.” He says, but I don’t listen, I’m absolutely consumed by the feeling of his cock around my pussy. I feel full and content with his cock complelty in my pussy. “Damn it Y/n, I said wait.” He shouts, “What? You don’t wanna be deep inside me anymore?” I tease. I can hear Joel gridding his molars together. “No I just wanted to make ure that you were on birth control you brat.” oh I bite my lip and nod my head. “Words darlin’ words.” “Yes, so you can cum as deep as you want Joel.” Theres an undeinable smile on his face, as he sets an unforgiving pace.

Water pools around the clawfoot tub as Joel pushes me forward. My hands gripping the tub as the sound of skin slapping bounces off the walls around us. The blinds opne but the summer streets empty. “Joel anybody would see us!” I moan as he wraps a large around the back of my neck forcing my to look towards the window. “Oh darlin’ I’m kinda hoping gets to see the sort of show you put on. Your ass so high up in the air, tits boucing and making mess around my cock. I bet I can make you cum again just like this.” His pace somehow gets faster and harder. 

“Yeah, I can feel you squeezin’ my cock.” Joel mutters, “Wait I wanna…” My words die in my thaort as his other hand comes down between my legs and plays with my clit. A few circles and a few pinches “Wiat Joel please…” “Hmm what do you want now princess?” He asks through his own grunts of passion. “I wanna cum with you, please Joel cum inside me with me??!” I beg him, “Alright… alright princess, you can cum with me but you better be ready when I am.” He says, “I will be I will be Joel just pelase make me cum daddy.” Something in Joel must break, or maybe it was already broken because the pace he sets now is body breaking. My knuckles are white, and my mouth is just hanging open. “Come on princess squeeze my cock like a good little girl, and then I’ll give it you. Pump you full with my seed.” His words push me over the edge and with that my second orgasm rolls over my shoudlers. Joel pumps a few more times deep inside before he slips out and falls gracefully to the tubs floor. 

We sit in silence for a moment. Joels words are the first thing that hit the sex smelling air. “This by the way sweertheart. Is NOT a one time deal.” he says grabbing my hips and pulling back down into his hold. We sit until the water goes cold, and or skin is wrinkly. “I’ll clean up after we get you somethin’ to eat missy.” He says wrapping the towels around my tired frame. I only nod unwilling to disturbe the peace of the moment.

Completed on: 04/10/24

Posted on: 04/13/24

Joel Miller-

[heartfulselkie]

WIP Game

Thanks @coffeebanana and @rosie-b for the tag, and thank you @kasienda for coming up with this new game!

List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)

An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing

Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!

Then tag 10 writer friends!

WIP TITLES

So I'm kind of cheating a bit with my choices here I guess since I have a lot of ideas but not so many actual active WiPs. So some of these aren't actually stuff that has been posted (or not posted in fic form) but they're all what my rodent brain is rotating right now.

Bell the Cat - Ladyblanc Knight AU. Enemies to Reluctant Allies to Lovers. Plenty of angst and trauma to be had in this one!

2. Sad Machine - Not currently available. I'm attempting aiming to have the fic more or less completed before I start posting. Futurist/Cyberpunk-type AU. No Miraculous but there's a dash of vigilantism and mysterious happenings to solve. And some questionable ethics (thanks Gabe).

3. Porceline Girl - Emonette and Badrien (post Paris Special) Oneshot that I'm hoping to finish soon. They're just angsty teens trying to figure out what is love how to be around each other.

4. Kaleidoscope - (not currently a posted fic so link leads to my tumblr tag) Kwami Swap AU with a dose of amnesia! Love Square is a mess in this with a Reunioned Ghostbug trying to solve all the problems. Adrien needs a coffee and a nap. Tikki needs a drink.

5. Citrus and Lavender - Enemies to Lovers AU with Chat Noir being deceived into being on Hawk Moth's side from the very beginning. The kids need therapy and Gabriel needs jail.

UPCOMING

There's is so much I'm looking forward to with Bell the Cat, but with the upcoming chapters I'm excited about introducing some more characters into this world! And of course all the Ladyblanc banter to be had!

2. This is my little pet project at the moment that I am slow roasting in the microwave. There are so many things that I am foaming at the mouth for that I want to just spit the fic out onto ao3 already but I'm trying to go slow with this one.

3. I'm just excited to feed myself more Toxigriffe, even if its in Adrinette form. I have so many ideas for these two but this oneshot is the closest to being finished. I'm excited to have it done (soon! hopefully!)!

4. Another one that's been slow roasting for a bit. I'll admit I'm still undecided with how I want to post this - do I go full fanfic on ao3 with it? Or a webcomic-style on tumblr? Perhaps a hybrid of both? I normally go with writing for longer stories, but this AU really got its interest and following through my random comics of it. It's exciting to think about my options as I could really challenge myself with it (even if opting for a more webcomic style is terrifying in its own way).

5. We're finally reaching the point in the story where Ladynoir are trying to transition from stalwart enemies to shy and unsure partners. All sides of the love square are standing on bambi legs right now as things are very new and scary - but at least they'll slowly learn they have each other to lean on!

I think most of my usual victims have been tagged already - so consider this an open invitation to anyone who wants to do it! I'm tagging you! Yes, you!

[thewritingmagician2022]

Chronically Ill MC - Dateables

As someone with multiple chronic illnesses (including one or two  that’s tried to take me out), fantasy is one of the few things that gets me through my bad days. With that in mind, I was inspired to talk about how the brothers/dateables not only handle dating someone with chronic illness but also what one little thing they do to help.

Lucifer

Lucifer may not seem the like the most empathetic partner to someone with a chronic illness. Lucifer does a lot every day and he expects the same from the people in his life. He keeps high standards and there aren’t many things that will considered a valid explanation for not meeting them, even sickness. However, he’s not totally unreasonable and once he learns how truly sick you are, he dedicates himself to readjusting those standards/goals and makes sure that you aren’t pushing yourself past your limits.  The main thing that Lucifer does to support you as your partner is going to appointments with you. When you’re chronically ill, it’s almost impossible to not have regular appointments, usually with multiple doctors. The other uncomfortable truth about those visits is that the doctors typically aren’t too great. It’s all too easy to get brushed off, talked over, and not taken seriously, especially if you happen to be a female or person of color. Lucifer being there not only calms your anxiety but also makes sure that you are better seen and heard in the appointments. He is not letting that doctor leave without doing their job properly. 

Mammon

Mammon keeps up his typically uncaring personality in front of people where he can tend to tease you or downplay your sickness; however, he is also fiercely overprotective. He doesn’t let anyone else near you and is constant checking in to see if you’ve eaten, slept enough, have everything you need, etc. If anyone bothers you about your illness(es), he’s 100% going after them. You may be a sick, pathetic human but you’re his and he’s not going to let you be slandered by anyone!  As his nice thing that Mammon does for you and your chronic illness(es), is buying you all sort of things that might help. He definitely didn’t google what sort of things to buy your chronically ill partner or anything and then buy everything off those lists, whether or not it applied to your illness(es). Those damn Buzzfeed lists will be the death of Goldie at this point. He makes sure you want for nothing. Most of the time he won’t even give the items to you like a normal person, he’ll just leave them in your room or in your bag or address the box to you as if you’ve ordered it yourself. He doesn’t want you to know how badly he wants to take care of you. 

Levi

Levi is a nervous Nelly, only because he cares. He definitely does some research like Satan, though he’s much more invested in the message boards than doctors studies. He definitely joins a support group for caregivers to get a better idea of what to expect and what he can do for you. He’s happy to always stay home with you when you’re not feeling well; in fact, it really works for his life style if you want to stay comfy and cozy in his bedroom most of the time while he keeps you company/entertains you.  Speaking of which, Levi’s one thing he does for you is keeping a basket full of stuff in his bedroom for you. As a gamer who can hole up in his room for hours (or even days) at a time, he prepares for this. He’s got his little fridge and microwave for you and a large basket of everything you usually need: heated blankets, heating pads, water bottles, medication, arts and crafts, sleep masks and headphones, etc. He’s even got a little gaming station set up for you in there in case you want to play some cozy games when you’re not up to chatting with him but still want something to do “together”. 

Satan

Satan is the king of research. The moment that you open up about your illness(es), he’s taking notes and getting ready. He’s going to spend a lot of time figuring out what’s going on with you, what it means for your human body, and what your treatment options look like. He’s going to be collecting firsthand information from you as well so he knows exactly what your symptoms and daily life are like. He’s that person who will keep a planner with your appointments, manage your medication, and stay completely up to date on any new research that comes out about your illness(es). He’s sort of like your own mini nurse at this point.  For his main supportive trait (as if he doesn’t so enough), Satan is always making sure that you’re utilizing the best coping skills possible. This includes enjoying fresh air and, when possible, getting movement. He sees how much research supports those things, including sunlight and the company of animals. He’ll have a sun light from Akuzon on you while he hangs out with you in the gardens or takes you out on the town for a little walk. If you’re not allergic, he also brings cats to hang out and purr on your lap so you can de-stress while petting them. 

Asmo

Asmo struggles with having a chronically ill partner. It’s not because he doesn’t care but he can be thoughtless about your conditions and he’s someone who always wants to be going out and doing things. Sometimes you have to remind him of your limitations and then he’s going to tone it down and pamper you at home like it’s reason for living. He’s gonna make sure you’re doing all the self-care and whatever you can’t do, he’ll do for you.  For his one special habit, he’s going to take you to the best spas and salons where you can get all of the relaxation that you deserve. You’ve had a long day with him and you’re probably tired and sore so best believe that Asmo has signed you both up for massages and facials and getting your nails done. You’ll be relaxed and ready for a good night’s sleep once they’re finished with you. Asmo seems like he would set up weekly or biweekly visit to these places under the guise of trying out new places/new treatments but really he just wants to make sure you’re being pampered like you deserve and those massages will hopefully help with the body aches.  And if you can’t manage to go out for those things, he’s going to do them all for you at home where you can be as comfortable as possible. 

Beel

Beel can be a little overprotective of his chronically ill partner. He hates the idea of you being sick and suffering; it’s a constant reminder of how delicate and vulnerable you are as a human. It triggers his Lilith PTSD just a little because he’s more afraid of losing you, especially to something that he can’t fight or protect you from. He tends to wait on you hand and foot, and he’s always making sure you’re fed the best foods and drinks the Devildom has to offer so that you keep up your strength. The thing that Beel does for you to support you is provide you with massages and/or pets. As an athlete, Beel knows how important it is to keep the body stretched, soothed, and strong. This means that he’s actually very proficient at giving massages. Beel will lead you through a series of stretching whenever you’re up for it (who would have guessed that he’s so skilled at yoga and not just all muscle?) so that you’re able to get in some kind of daily movement. Then he’ll rub down any sore muscles and work out any kinks that you may have. If there’s a time when you’re so sore you can’t stand any strong touch or movement, Beel is more than happy to rub your back or pet your hair to help soothe you to sleep and keep you calm. 

Belphie

Belphie struggles a bit with a chronically ill partner simply because he is a very sleepy boy which makes him lazy and not totally capable of being a caretaker. He relies on his older brothers for a lot. But the good news is that he does transfer that skill over to you. You both get spoiled quite a bit by the other brothers who have accepted you as someone to be loved and protected the same way they do for Belphie. Additionally, Belphie never makes you feel bad for spending your down time resting. You guys have fun in mellow ways and you don’t have to worry about being fun or entertaining, you can just be yourself.  The best thing about having Belphie as a chronically ill person is that he is the best napping and bed rotting companion out there. You will never have a partner more excited to make sure you’re well rested. Belphie will spend all day with you in bed without a second thought. He’s got movies or music for entertainment, he’s got the comfiest bed and pillows and blankets, he’s got fans and heating pads, he’s got bottles of water on his bedside and snacks too so he doesn’t have to get out of bed for them, he’s got lavender oil to spray to help you get better sleep. You would never be more comfortable anywhere else and he’s going to snuggle you the whole time, assuming you’re up for that. 

Diavolo

Diavolo is a very courteous boyfriend to a chronically ill partner. He’s incredibly busy and he feels terrible that he’s not able to spend more time with you but he’s always happy to have your company while you rest. He lets you sit in on meetings or while he does paperwork. You’re quiet and diligent and he’s so impressed by how much you manage to not only do but do well while you struggle with your illness(es). You get your RAD work done and wrangle the brothers and always make sure to have time for Diavolo even when he’s whiny and cranky. He loves and respects that about you and so he does his best to always show you that same kindness and support.   Diavolo has the habit of sending you gift baskets when he’s not able to be around. They’re full of both treats and necessary supplies so that there’s nothing you could want for. He also lends Barbatos to you. It can’t be all the time unfortunately, since Barbatos has quite a lot of his own work to do, but if there’s any long gaps in your ability to see Diavolo, he makes sure you have Barbatos to keep you company and wait on you hand and foot for at least a few hours. Barbatos is one of the few people Diavolo trusts totally, especially with something as important as you, so you feel special to have him assigned to you. 

Barbatos

Barbatos is such an attentive boyfriend to a chronically ill partner. He’s used to serving Diavolo and essentially being a mixture of servant, nurse, valet, therapist, etc. so stepping into the role of caregiver is natural and easy for him. He relishes the idea of taking care of you. If you’re someone who truly hates the idea, he’ll back off and just play the role of doting boyfriend but, unless you’re actively fighting against it, he’s going to dedicate himself to making sure you’re taken care of. He’ll help with doctors, scheduling, accommodations in the Devildom, and making sure you have ample emotional support, including making sure the brothers aren’t causing you any undue stress.  The one thing Barbatos does for you that he enjoys most and excels at is keeping you well nourished. As we know, Barbatos has an affinity for tea and he has hundreds of kinds from the Devildom, celestial realm, and human realm alike. He will brew you a type for every symptom or illness, and some that may just help your anxiety or help you sleep. He keeps notes of what you enjoy most and stocks up so you have some at the HoL as well. If you hate tea, he will find other beverages or broths that are equally helpful and good for your body. He’s also a fantastic cook and can modify the recipes to anything your body needs. Allergies, intolerances, taste preferences - he takes all of it into account and therefore creates the perfect meals and snacks for you. He regularly sends you home with food and will make sure there’s always something for you at RAD or the palace. It’s the most basic way to care for someone and it makes him feel great to know you’re taken care of.  

Solomon

Solomon is a good partner for someone chronically ill because it’s impossible to phase him. He’s seen it all, all types of illnesses and injuries and accidents. There’s nothing that grosses him out or is too stressful to deal with. He may get a little introspective sometimes because it makes him think about your mortality in comparison to his and he knows that, once upon a time, he may have been just like you. He does his best to make your life as easy as possible, even offering magic items or potions to help. It doesn’t matter if it’s just offering you temporary relief from your symptoms or making a specific task easier for you, as long as he can help, he’s happy. Plus he’s been studying the human body and health for a long time so he’s the most knowledgeable and has a wide variety of options and ideas for you.  Speaking of studying the human body for a long time, Solomon has been conducting his own research and experiments for almost as long. He’s been around for multiple plagues and diseases across the globe and throughout time and, even though they can’t affect him, he’s kept up with the science behind it all. He’s been helping develop cures and vaccines for a long time; regularly passing off his findings to people who can actually put them into action. That means once he knows what’s ailing you, he’s going to turn his focus towards it to see if he can speed up the discovery of a cure. He doesn’t want you to have to suffer for a minute longer than necessary and he’s got every possible resource at his fingertips to help change that for you (and others like you) so he’s going to more seriously dedicate his time and energy towards that goal. 

Simeon

Simeon is the kind of partner who helps you keep your wits about you and keep your spirits up when you’re dealing with chronic illness(es). It’s so easy to get swept up in a chronic illness: the symptoms, the appointments, the doctors, financial responsibilities, socializing, school or work, the future. Sometimes it can feel like you’re drowning and it’s impossible to pull yourself out of the negativity and the hopeless feeling. Simeon is always there to hold out his hand and pull you out of the water with his calm, soothing tone and support and encouragement. He holds your hand every step of the way and brings positivity to your life. He highly encourages you to utilize meditation and gratitude, without pushing so far as to go into toxic positivity. Sometimes he’s the only thing that keeps you holding on.  One of the best ways that Simeon supports you is by helping you with basic tasks that you may be too embarrassed to ask for help with normally, including bathing. Simeon is always happy to run you a hot bath and will put in epsom salts or essential oils or vitamin drops as needed. Hell, even if it’s just for fun, he’s happy to make it a lovely bubbly mess for you to splash around in and relax. He’s the kind of partner who will happily either climb in with you or, if there’s no room, he’ll sit behind you or to the side and help wash your hair, being so careful to keep soap out of your eyes and ears. He’ll wash your back and feet and face, with such smooth and gentle hands as he talks to you so sweetly. If you can’t take a bath, he’ll make sure you have a shower bench/chair or at least him to hold onto while you shower. It’s always the highlight of your day when he does this for you and you feel so close to him. 

[sighs-deeply-and-dreadfully]

,,, so, I’m being self indulgent,,,,,,,,,, haha!!

This isn’t a request! Just me being silly! :]

Love Languages

Wally Darling Love Language Headcanons, no assigned reader!

Headcanons format, not super specified romantic or platonic, so envision it as you please!

Honestly, I truly dearly envision Wally to have quality time, gift giving, and physical touch as love languages. Like, so dearly truly so, haha!!

I feel he’s the type to simply just.. hand a gift to someone. Randomly.

“What’s this?” “A gift!” “Is.. is this a bent paperclip?-“ “No, it’s a gift!”

I feel he tries to get personalized gifts, but— ah, he’s a bit silly, haha!! I feel sometimes it’d backfire, and his train of thought as to why this was the absolute most perfectest gift tends to twirl too much in his little apple shaped brain— to where it kind of just.. doesn’t make sense.

But a gift is a gift!!!! It’s the thought that counts!

As for physical touch, I believe he’s still learning it, haha! If I recall correctly, Clown mentioned he just goes limp upon being hugged— but I could be remembering wrong!

Either way, he can be instructed! He will figure it out! Even if sometimes it backfires, like his constant blowing of kisses (also mentioned by Clown!) !!

He strikes me as the type to just.. want to use someone as a pillow.

They’re just, sitting, minding their business, and suddenly he’s just.. at their side. Pillow……..

I think he’d like to hold hands. I think he’d just like hands in general. Maybe this is a smidge of self projection, but I’m an artist that loves hands. dearly so. I find their structure really interesting!! I feel he’s similar.

I think he’d just like to hold someone’s hand and look at it and how it moves. That’s real intimacy right there, folks!!! /lhj

If someone were to try and interlock their fingers with his, whether platonically or romantically, I think he’d just stare. Processing… until he gets it!

Don’t expect to be getting that hand back anytime soon, friend! That isn’t your hand, anymore! It’s our hand.

Overall, I feel he wouldn’t express physical affection in any normal way. I feel cuddling and the hand stuff is the closest exception, but other than that?

I think he’d just lay on someone. Like, you have yours legs sprawled out? Ahh, what a lovely hammock!

Are you laying on your stomach? Ahh, what a lovely pillow!

He just kind of.. compresses on impact. Pillow.

Gift that man a weighted blanket and I think he’d know peace. True peace.

I think just laying on him would content him, too, HAHA

He strikes me as the ‘likes physical pressure as affection’ kind

Also plays into quality time!!!

But, for the most part, quality time can just be spent in many ways.

Hanging out and chatting, doing your own individual activities in the same room, sleeping around each other,,, squeeshy

He just takes being in the presence of someone for a while as quality time, and he feels very grateful for his friends when he does <33

Just a silly little guy:)

Might be projection again, but I feel he struggles to express his affection in an easily digestible way— so just? Understanding his love languages and what counts as affection on his end? Is so delightful and appreciated

ESPECIALLY if it’s reciprocated

I feel how he feels loved, in return, are the same ones!!! Along with words of affirmation!! Squenshy

Bon appetite (???) HAHAH

I’m somewhat half awake, this has just been rotating in my brain like a microwave plate, so don’t mind any grammatical errors! I’ll fix them laterrrrrrrr

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 3 thoughts

here we go! this episode is titled "blood" which did not bode well for me, the girl who hates blood. but i am dedicated and pushed through in the name of our mission.

we open at a post office. sometimes, i think it would be fun to work in a post office.

but alas! our postman has received a paper cut. he licks it up which... can't be hygienic.

and then he immediately gets fired :( this is sooooo unfair

when he returns to his post his machine reads "KILL"!!! my first thought was that this was gonna be a little shop of horrors style thing where an inanimate object tastes blood and Likes it (Which is sort of what happened? but mostly not really)

((side note: need to see mulder and scully take on audrey two))

so it seems that the people are either being told by machines to do some killing or all the members of the town are experiencing collective hallucination...

mulder arrives. i was distracted by his fluffy hair. from the notes: "his hair is fluffy. he isn't saying much at this crime scene but his hair is fluffy"

! MULDER LORE REVEAL ! he played right field! (this was brought up when the policeman mentioned the suspect was on the softball team)

back to our post office friend, who is near a child with a random nosebleed whilst getting some money, and now the ATM is telling him to kill people

mulder points out that these are spree killings and not serial ones <-okay human embodiment of the nerd emoji.

it's a totally normal report on the crimes, no spooky stuff involved, and scully is reading it... until he mentions UFOs and she says to herself "i was wondering when you'd get to that" LMAOOOOO she knows him too well

we see a woman being lured into a dark garage by a mechanic and i thought i knew where this was going but i DIDN'T because SHE gets paranoid and the machine tells her the guy is gonna get her and she freaks out and STABS HIM

mulder arrives to the crime scene with a really funny looking camera. can anyone provide me more information about this camera? i'm curious

anyway, he shows up at the house of the woman who killed the mechanic, and we see another example of his bountiful social skills when he asks to come in and she says "i'm late for work" and he just barges in and says "you can blame me". i love this man so bad it's actually a problem. he WILL get inside of ur house.

but her microwave is telling her to kill him and she pulls out a knife and STABS him and i was yelling NOOOOOOOO! and then the cop he was with shoots her and VERY QUICKLY we get a cutscene to....

SCULLY AUTOPSY TIME!!!!!!

she thinks there's some sort of chemical that is making the people do this

we also see poor wet meow meow mulder's bandaged arm :(

back to the ex-postman, who is seeking new gainful employment at a supermarket in which there are guns for sale in the back, another reminder that this show is set in america. he starts to see evil things in the TV but resists (and it might be related to the blood drive at the store but? it's a little unclear tbh)

mulder running scene! getting his cardio in! the man is dripping in sweat! he sees a guy toss some stuff in a yard and it's... dead bugs?

so who does he take the bugs to? well, the weirdos who previously were consulted for another case: the conspirators at the lone gunman! famous for the one guy hitting on scully and ripping up her twenty dollar bill

so we're back to these freaks and he says he didn't see their latest issue because "it arrived the same day as my subscription to Celebrity Skin"

now, i had an educated guess here based on name alone, but needed to confirm what this "celebrity skin" truly was. a search brings you to an album by the band Hole, and i was like omg!!! we're gonna get an insight into his canon music taste!!!! there is nothing more i LOVE than learning a character's favorite artists <3

but, this cannot be... for the show takes place before 1998, when the album was released... so i dig further

chat, as expected, it is a porn mag. seems to have involved some unethical stuff. mulder: ur a sick man.

the even sicker man who previously hit on scully was like "where's your little friend?" and he counters with "she wouldn't come. she was too afraid of her love for you" and the weirdo responds with "she's tasty"

now i want you to buckle your seat belts for what mulder says next. buckled? secured? sat? everyone is in a safe position? okay. he says:

"you know, it's men like you that give perversion a bad name"

HELLO? hey. hi! quick question <3 what does that mean. mulder a freak confirmed????

(i mean i guess we DID already know he fucked phoebe on arthur conan doyle's grave, which is going to stick in my head forever, but. don't make it worse. sometimes he's such a Man)

anyway the weirdos at the lone gunman think it's related to pesticides. and then mulder asks to borrow their night vision goggles and the weirdest of weirdos is like "only if you give me scully's number!"

cutscene to him using the night goggles

(mulder, if you gave that creep her number, i will NEVER forgive you. so keep that in mind)

he's sitting in a field and it looks so natural, like he really belongs there. bring back sitting in fields. but then he breaks into the orchard and gets sprayed by some pesticides and thoroughly knocked on his ass

mulder's yelling at some guy to take responsibility for the pesticides that he thinks are killing people... a moral crusader serving on the front lines...

scully's here now, btw. she took his blood. which had to be a strange experience. and then she mentions that she FLEW 300 MILES in the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT to come take his blood?

holy shit, mulder. she did that for you and you've been so broody and angsty lately and maybe even gave some dick her phone number. holy shit mulder, do not blow this. you cannot afford to blow this. she is soooo good to you.

anyway, he's seeing the same evil messages in technology the killers were now so that's a bummer

mulder proposes that this is some sort of subliminal messaging thing that is being activated by the fear-inducing pesticides and the cop gets pissed and leaves, to which he says "he's probably one of those people that thinks Elvis is dead"

so that's the SECOND line in this show about him being an elvis truther and i'm starting to think it's not a joke

back to the ex-postman. people are coming to his door to take blood and test for the chemicals in the pesticides and he's going bonkers. he's seeing "KILL" in his calculator, which is how you know things are rough. his watch even beeps and says "KILL" which i think would make a very very very very funny gif if anyone has that.

well, all of a sudden he's missing so the agents go to his house and knock. until.

scully realizes the door is open and just. lets herself in. i was laughing SO hard here. these bitches WILL get into your house. they will NOT wait for an invitation. truly a sign of soulmatism.

ex-postman was running running and they're like omg where is heeeeee he's gonna hurt people!!! scully is once again proving her genius status by saying that if it's a paranoia case, then all these guys in police uniforms need to get out of view.

(there's also this shot where mulder is like. smoldering. and she's behind him and man. height difference content i really really do love you and your work <3)

our crazed ex-postman climbs a tower at a college and is gonna start shooting but he's also hallucinating and laughing maniacally which i described in my notes as "entering his joker era"

mulder runs up and prevents a shootout using some handy jujitsu. neeeeed to see if this man is a black belt. for character driven purposes.

but he says that he knows the guy can't stop and overall it's an eerie situation because you can tell the pesticides are still in his brain as well. and his arm is bleeding again and this makes the other guy go into overdrive.

um. okay.

crisis averted...?

well, you sure would like to think that, wouldn't you? but the episode ends with mulder calling scully, and then HE sees more evil stuff in his phone! and it fades to blackness as her voice is heard through the speaker...

(i love that she knew it was him immediately. despite the silence. and that her train of thought went from "it's scully" to "mulder is it you?" to "mulder, what's wrong?" talk about a connection!)

hope he doesn't do anything too impulsive...

in conclusion: my very surface level interpretation of this episode was that it was warning us to not be controlled by technology, which i'm sure felt more relevant back in the day. but now that i have to click "don't sell my data" when i browse flavors of soup for sale online, i think we might just no longer be the target audience. or maybe it's even more relevant! an argument could be made both ways.

down with pesticides, though! i can get behind that! when's the last time you saw a bee? bring them back!