#charlie has some splaining to do!
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I Can Explain: Chaggie
Vaggie: Ugh.... I need a nap.... just ten minutes of silence. Is that so much to ask for? *opens the door to her bedroom*
Charlie: *blushes and jumps as she stares nervously at the door, cradling a pillow that is tucked underneath her shirt*
Vaggie: ............
Charlie: ............
Vaggie: ..........
Charlie: ..........I can explain.
Vaggie: ......I have time.
Charlie: *didn't expect to be called out* .......I can no longer explain.......
Vaggie: .......Okay........ Do you want to talk about this?
Charlie: ........Can I keep the pillow in?
Vaggie: ........Yes.
#chaggie#charlie#vaggie#fake pregnant#pretend#charlie has some splaining to do!#not part of any child au#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel incorrect quotes
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AMBITION Season 2 ♫ “We’ll Be the Stars” [ 2.11 ]
CREATED BY Esther (rapunzles) & Maggie (quincywillows) || S2 Tag || Official Page
A NIGHT TO REMEMBER – Tensions are set aside in honor of a promenade, and some students opt for a change of pace. A clever ruse forces Eric and Jack to team up. Unfortunate circumstances make for odd couples, but stars always know where they’re supposed to go in the end.
66 Minutes (18K words) || No content warnings apply.
[ ← Rarely Pure and Never Simple ] [ S2 Synopsis ] [ Final Run → ]
( Follow along with the music on Spotify here! )
INT. AAA - DAY
A series of shots guide us into the episode, displaying the school in the midst of preparing for promenade. Banners are hung, student council members work the ticket booth. The halls are decorated according to the theme, “We’ll Be the Stars,” small stars seemingly glittering on every visible surface. A promposal wraps up in the hall outside the auditorium, senior students applauding and cheering as the girl says yes and the other girl wraps her in a tight hug.
Yes, it’s prom time at Adams Academy for the Arts. Let the insanity commence!
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
FARKLE MINKUS opens his locker. We’re looking at him from the inside, giving us a look at it as he rearranges some things. Its decor has been updated after a long detour of being trapped in sophomore year -- there are fewer photos, but they are newer and more representative of the way things actually are now. A couple photos of him and Maya are the focal point, but there’s a few scattered notable mentions. A photograph of the full Junior A Class; a picture of his whole family; a rare capture of him and Isadora.
From outside the confines of the locker, we hear RILEY MATTHEWS speak.
Riley: And you’re sure you can handle it? I’m sure if you wanted, we could work out something else --
Perspective shifts back to its usual framing, showing the two of them hanging by his locker. Farkle stems her worrying from the start, holding up a hand.
Farkle: I’m going to stop you right there, Riley. Do you know what you’re doing to me right now?
Riley: … demonstrating concern as a good friend?
Farkle: You’re neuro-splaining me. [ off Riley’s expression ] I get it, you’re concerned about my health. Mentally, above all else.
Riley makes a face, obviously not sold on the concept of “neuro-splaining.” As if she hasn’t had her own mental health experiences… but she figures it’s not worth the argument.
Farkle: But trust me, as much as I appreciate it, I will be fine. [ a beat ] I don’t want to miss out on anything else essential to my junior year experience, and prom is one of those things. Not to mention, I certainly won’t be able to graciously receive my prom king crown if I’m not there to accept it.
It’s clear he’s joking, although with his dry delivery… either way, he’s made up his mind. Farkle will be in attendance at the upcoming event, come hell or high water.
Farkle: Besides, it’s bold of you to assume I could avoid it anyway.
Riley: How come?
Farkle: Prom isn’t just an event around here. [ pointedly ] It’s a contagion.
As he closes his locker --
INT. AAA - CLASSROOM - DAY
For how alight with excitement the halls seem to be, classes are still in session and there’s still work to be done. The energy is tamped down in Cory’s classroom, where everyone is completing silent reading for the last few minutes of class.
Still, Farkle was right, and the junior class has been bitten by the prom bug. Everyone is jittery as they sit at their desks, unable to keep still. Under the desk, ZAY BABINEAUX taps his foot to an unheard rhythm. MAYA HART flips her pencil in her fingers, adding to the rhythm against her desk.
CHARLIE GARDNER glances up at the clock, impatiently watching the seconds go by. Tick, tick, tick… as the percussions slowly evolve into an actual beat...
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “You Should Be Dancing” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by AAA Juniors
The bell rings about 7 seconds in, releasing the class from their academic torture. CORY MATTHEWS cringes as the energy in the room skyrockets, papers flying as the energetic juniors are free to succumb back into the groove.
Zay kicks off the vocals, the number staying in the classroom for the first verse as he volleys lyrics back and forth with Maya. As they escape into the halls…
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
Charlie takes over, leading the charge into the rest of the school. The three of them are the front of the pack, but they pick up other junior students as they go. The whole atmosphere of the halls has changed, feeling groovier in the midst of the twinkling stars and amped up music.
Around a minute and a half in, they pass by Riley and Farkle and pull them into the dance. The movements become less chaotic and more choreographed at that point, truly a spectacle only AAA could pull off.
As they pass by the techies hanging out on the stairs outside the auditorium, it seems even they aren’t immune to the allure of prom fever. They jump up and join in the parade, JEFF MONROE in particular worth spotlighting due to his breakdancing ability.
And away they go again…
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
By the time they make it into the auditorium and onto the stage, the vibe of their collective imagination has completely succumbed to fantasy. The stage is basically a disco floor as they dance their way up there, the only thing still remaining commonplace their outfits.
And by this point, they’ve paired off. Farkle and Zay stay front and center -- a fun little duo to witness tolerating each other again, if nothing else -- with Maya and ISADORA DE LA CRUZ to their left and Charlie and YINDRA AMINO to their right. In the back, ASHER GARCIA and DYLAN ORLANDO are grooving together, while Riley Matthews gets LUCAS JAMES FRIAR to at least do something.
As they finish out the jam, Farkle and Zay theatrically toss their heads back and raise a hand to the sky. Declarative, with a flourish, what a dynamite finish. One thing is essentially guaranteed on this prom week, that’s for sure.
There will be no shortage of drama.
Cue title sequence.
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
Zay is at his locker, swapping out his dance duffle for his classwork. When Maya practically jumps him and surprises him at his locker, he’s not fazed -- he might be the only student at AAA who she doesn’t strike instant fear into in one capacity or another.
Zay: What do you want, mini Britney?
Maya touches her hand to her chest, faux flattered.
Maya: You’re so sweet. I was just thinking that you and I have a real opportunity on our hands this week.
Zay: Must everything be about an “opportunity?”
Maya: Ugh, would you stop being such a damp toilette? Your mood has been totally subbasement the last couple of weeks and it’s really harshing the vibes.
Well, Maya, he did just break up with his boyfriend. But people not knowing about them was kind of sort of the whole problem, so he says nothing as he allows Maya the floor again.
Maya: Chin up, Zayby. It’s promenade. And you and I are going to come out of it as royalty.
Maya makes her grand pitch: they should go to prom together. Not out of any romantic interest -- although, as she admits, Zay is by far the most eligible male in the walls of AAA -- but because the two of them would be a shoo-in for junior prom king and queen if they team up.
And like everything else at Adams, there is an opportunity attached. Every year, the duos crowned as prom king and queen in both grades get to perform at graduation. It’s a time honored tradition, one that Maya believes they should not pass up.
Zay: I don’t really see what the big deal is.
Maya: Oh, Zay. Isaiah! Wake up! Snap out of whatever quarter-life crisis funk you’ve succumbed yourself into and smell the potential right in front of you! [ matter-of-factly ] You know that there are always college representatives at Triple A graduation. Of course, it’s to honor the students they’ll be bringing into their ranks, and to hopefully snag some quality time with a celebrity family member or two -- I mean, think how many people are going to be swarming our graduation next year when Valerie comes to support Isadora --
Zay, flatly: Yeah, I’m sure she’s so excited about that.
Maya: But it’s also to scout the next crop of graduates. That’s us. It’s almost cosmic that every junior prom king and queen end up going to amazing schools for the arts -- there was even that junior prom queen in ‘96 who got a straight up recording contract.
Zay: How the hell do you know this stuff?
Maya: Because I do my research, Zay. And I know you do, too. Which is why once you’ve shaken off the ennui and have your head back on straight -- or, bi, whatever -- you’ll realize we have prime real estate in front of us. And it’s ours to take… if we step up to the plate. [ backing away ] You know where to find me.
Well, that’s certainly a proposition. Maya floats away as Zay contemplates it, slinging his bag over his shoulder. It’s a good point, he can’t argue with that, and yet…
He glances to the photo of him and Charlie, still taped up in his locker innocuously amongst the rest. In some ways, it seems, it’s just hard to let go of the way you hoped things would be.
Zay closes his locker, heading on his way to rehearsal.
Dylan, pre-lap: We’ll boycott.
INT. AAA - TECHNICIAN’S BOOTH - DAY
Dylan and Asher are following Lucas into the booth, obviously in a heated discussion. Dylan continues to make bold declarations.
Dylan: We’ll stage a full-on protest. You know, when I was in middle school, I was renowned for my poster-making skills in environmental club. They usually lasted like, nine days longer than usual before people tore them down. And Cory is always saying how loud and annoying I am -- that has to be helpful for a protest, yeah?
Asher: He said that to you?
Lucas: Guys --
Dylan: Or even better --
Asher: I swear, I’m going to report him. Like, sorry Riley --
Dylan: Let’s stage a riot. That’ll really show ‘em! They think they can bar Lucas James Friar from prom? Not when we’re there to literally blow the roof off this place. I bet we can get Isadora to sing “Bad Reputation” -- I think we’d need music to be taken seriously here, so --
Lucas: Hey. Hello. Earth to Asher and Dylan. [ clapping ] Let’s cool it, alright?
Lucas waves off their concerns about his ban from prom. He doesn’t want them wasting energy on him when it hardly matters. All things considered, being barred from stuff like this for the rest of the year seems like the best he could’ve asked for given all the bullshit he’s done this year. He slouches into his rolling chair, shrugging.
Lucas: I mean, it’s not like I was really psyched to go anyway. I think I’m more lucky I didn’t get expelled.
Dylan, under his breath: Would’ve boycotted that too.
Lucas: You guys have been looking forward to this for the last three years. It would be stupid for you to blow it just for me. Especially when we consider everything else you’ve already sacrificed for me. Like your sanity. And your clean legal record.
Dylan: I wasn’t mad.
Lucas, bluntly: You should have been. Asher was, but then, he’s always been the smartest out of the three of us.
A beat of quiet as that truth lingers between them. Lucas reiterates the point -- that he doesn’t want them to give up something they care about just because of him. They do enough of that already. Asher and Dylan exchange a look.
Dylan, softer: … well, we love you, man.
Lucas: I know. [ looking at them, then slowly ] And I love you guys, too.
Well, there’s a breakthrough! Dylan beams, looking to Asher in excitement. Asher is smiling too, although a bit more bashful. Lucas elects to move past the vulnerability quickly -- he can give it, but only so much at a time.
Lucas: Which is why I’m not letting you do this. You’re going to prom, and you’ll have a great time without me. Besides, someone has to give whatever posh performers are gunning for prom court a run for their money.
True enough. In fact...
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
That’s exactly what the rest of the techies are discussing as they start doing end of year inventory. It’s a long process, so they have to start early. Rather, they’re complaining as Jeff and DAVE WILLIAMS pick their way through the furniture and wood supplies under the prop loft. NATE MARTINEZ is supposed to be taking notes, but he’s not doing a great job.
JADE BEAMON is seated on a stack of wood pieces, nodding along as she feverishly works on the finishing touches to a wardrobe piece. It doesn’t look like a costume for any sort of production, however…
Nate: It’s rigged, anyway. Every year the most popular performers win so it’s not like the institution means anything.
Jeff: Does prom court mean anything… anywhere? Ever?
Dave: My parents were prom queen and king when they were seniors. They got a free dinner at Waffle House.
Jade: [ tearing a thread with her teeth ] Sounds like a better prize than performing at graduation.
Inspired by their complaints, Nate lights up with an idea. He claims that they should start a new tradition to go with their holiday party, and should throw a techie pre-prom bash. That way they can celebrate their year together and have real fun before they have to go deal with the performers all night.
Jade: You know, I think that’s the first idea of yours I’ve liked in months.
Nate bows, then enthusiastically gives Dave a high-five.
Their tomfoolery is interrupted by Isadora entering, all of them growing uncertainly quiet. She hesitates but then marches onward anyway, greeting them with the best attitude she can muster. She just came by to drop off some paperwork for them -- she already went ahead and inventoried the wood and set building supplies. This is good, because Nate definitely wasn’t doing it.
Jeff accepts her record, looking it over.
Dave: When did you do that?
Isadora: Oh, I just skipped Matthews’ class. [ offhandedly ] I could ace that class with my eyes closed, so. And probably brain damage.
It’s a nice gesture, and they’re not going to refuse it. Jeff awkwardly thanks her, silence settling over them once again. Isadora clears her throat, clasping her hands together. She expresses that she knows she messed up with them, and she is going to put in the effort to get back in their good graces.
She spins and escorts herself out without waiting for a response, leaving the four of them to contemplate her promise. Interesting development…
Dave: So… we don’t have to count the wood?
INT. AAA - CAFETERIA - DAY
Charlie is having lunch with HALEY FISHER and CLARISSA CRUZ, although he doesn’t seem nearly as enthused about prom as they are. On the other side of the cafeteria, applause erupts again as another promposal between seniors gains public attention. So happy, so romantic!
Clarissa: I swear, nowhere in this school is safe right now.
Haley nudges Clarissa, claiming that she should be less cynical. It takes a lot of bravery to ask someone to prom in front of everyone else.
Clarissa: Yes, well, then they could just have a conversation about it. Or make a big deal about it, but like, between the two of you.
Haley: I think it’s romantic.
Clarissa: You think everything is romantic. You’re the most hopeless romantic I’ve ever met.
Haley: Charlie is too -- you agree with me, don’t you, Charlie?
In all honesty, Charlie was not listening. He blinks himself out of his daze, blankly agreeing with whatever Haley said. Clarissa rolls her eyes.
Haley goes to explain how much courage it takes to do such a public proposal. It demonstrates what you’re willing to go through for the other person, how much you like them. Charlie admits that it’s not exactly an act of bravery to ask someone who you know will say yes -- especially when there’s no stakes involved for either of you.
Haley: Well, there’s always stakes. You know, even if you think you know someone, they could always say no. And there’s a lot at stake with a rejection… you know, especially if it’s… [ looking at Charlie intently ] between good friends…
Whatever hint Haley is trying to lay down, it’s going right over Charlie’s head. He shrugs, claiming he might not even go to prom. He’s just... not feeling it this year. Haley is mortified, Clarissa looking between the two of them apprehensively. This seems like a recipe for disaster.
Meanwhile, the techies are enjoying lunch at their usual indoor table when NIGEL CHEY approaches. He greets them before turning his focus to Jade.
Nigel: … hey, Jade.
Jade, shy: … um, hi.
Nigel: I, uh… I just had a quick question. I was wondering if, uh --
All of the techie eyes are on him, making this whole situation a lot more intense. Dylan is watching with wide eyes, wondering if what he thinks is going to happen is about to happen. Jade might be holding her breath. Nigel pushes up his sleeves nervously, clearing his throat.
Jade: … yes?
Nigel: I was just… [ quickly ] I had a question about the costume you made for that number last week. It’s actually… it’s nothing, I’ll just ask you about it in class. Sorry, ha ha. Didn’t mean to interrupt.
Jade: … oh. Okay.
Clearly not what he actually intended to ask. Nigel backs off awkwardly, making a quick escape. Jade tries to hide her disappointment. Asher and Dylan exchange a look across the table, shaking their heads. Pathetic!
All of the missed prom-portunities are forgotten, however, as soon as Maya and Zay arrive to kick off their pronouncement of going together. Evidently Zay agreed, because here they go…
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Greedy” as performed by Ariana Grande || Performed by Maya Hart & Zay Babineaux
It’s been a while since we’ve endured a good old disruption in the cafeteria during lunch hour, and this time Lucas is less likely to pull the fire alarm than ever. So Maya and Zay take full advantage of it, bringing up the energy with their talent and an undeniable bop.
They make a point of pulling other people into it at their tables, and of course, Maya is going to climb up onto the tables in her heeled boots. It’s not quite the same full-blown jam session as “Looking At Me” from earlier in the season, but people seem to be into it and in the general prom mood. Spirits are high!
Well, mostly. There is one pointed shot of Charlie forcing a smile as everyone else grooves along, likely wishing he could be anywhere else.
It’s not so much a promposal as it is… a spectacle, but boy, do they know how to put on a show… once they wrap, Maya makes the official statement that they’re campaigning for prom royalty, and if people have any taste, they sure know who to vote for come prom night.
Given how naturally glamorous the two of them are, up high on the table top and looking fresh as ever, it’s hard to argue with that!
INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - MASTER BEDROOM - NIGHT
Riley is hanging up her dress for prom, a classic and simple lavender floor-length number. She’s fretting over it as she vents to Maya, expressing that she’s still debating the whole upstate move thing Topanga has saddled her with.
Maya: Well, do you want to move?
Riley: I… it’s not that simple.
Maya: It should be. Either you want to go, or you don’t.
Riley: Yes, but… I mean… there’s lots to think about.
Maya: She said it was your choice.
Riley: Yeah, well, my mom says a lot of things she doesn’t mean, so…
Maya: Have you talked to Cory about it? He might have some insight. Or like, Eric?
Riley chews her lip, avoiding the question. Maya straightens up, asking if anybody knows about this potential move other than the two of them. Riley has plenty of excuses ready as to why she hasn’t mentioned it to anyone else, but Maya isn’t interested in hearing them. She claims she at least, at least, needs to tell Cory. He deserves to know, lest another life-changing thing get sprung on him with no warning.
Maya: Believe me, as the girl with no parents because of sudden life-altering moves, you owe him that decency.
Youch. Well, that’s tough to debate. Riley absorbs it, focusing back on her dress and smoothing it out nervously.
INT. GARDNER HOME - ROSIE’S ROOM - NIGHT
ROSIE GARDNER is chilling on her bed with her laptop, listening to pop music and humming to herself. Charlie comes and knocks on her door, pointedly until she takes out her earbuds.
Rosie: Ugh, yes? Can I help you?
Charlie: You’re so nice. How about, hey, Charlie? How was your day?
Rosie: I’m fourteen, I have the right to be obnoxious.
Charlie: I wouldn’t say it’s a right so much as an active choice.
Rosie groans, asking him what he even came in here for in the first place. He asks if she has anything going on this weekend -- perhaps they could go do something together. It’s been a minute since they did some brother-sister bonding.
Rosie: I dunno. I guess we could go see that new Chris Evans movie. I think it’s coming out next weekend, and I’m probably free Saturday --
Charlie: … well, I was thinking more this weekend. Specifically. Like not next weekend. This weekend.
Rosie: I know what this weekend means, weirdo. [ looking up movies ] Why are you so set on that? Isn’t it prom this weekend?
Charlie: … well, you know, it’s not a big deal. I was thinking I probably wouldn’t even go anyway, so.
Rosie, offended: Charlie! Ew, no, you can’t not go to prom. Don’t be lame, you’re embarrassing me.
Charlie, scoffing: This has nothing to do with you! You don’t even know anybody I go to school with.
Rosie: Yes, but by Gardner law, I’m associated. Just go with your friends! It does not have to be that deep.
Okay… fair point. Charlie questions if her blatant disgust means they’re not going to the movies, and she claims next week… after he doesn’t embarrass their family name by going to prom like everyone else. So much for finding a clever way out.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Speaking of clever escapes, JACK HUNTER is still struggling to find a way out of the Bradford debacle. So much to the point that he’s now elected to share the issue with Lucas, sitting opposite him with ERIC MATTHEWS as they get him up to speed.
It’s obviously not the kind of thing you want to hear. Lucas is hiding his head in his hands, cursing to himself before turning back to Jack.
Lucas: How long have you known about this?
Jack: … a couple months --
Lucas: Months?
Eric tries to keep stress levels at a manageable level, taking over for Jack in explaining exactly what the suit entails and what the Bradfords are hoping to gain from it. Essentially, they’re hoping that publicly printing Jack’s “questionable” enrollment processes will force his hand. Either he’ll cave and let her enroll regardless, or public dissent will push him to oust Lucas, making room for her in his vacant spot.
Jack, reassuringly: Which will not happen.
But for it to gain any traction, it needs to smell somewhat of a scandal (even if it isn’t) -- which is why they’ve targeted Lucas as their student to blame. They’ve obviously done their research. And between Lucas’s unique situation for enrollment, his lack of participation in the more showcased elements of the school, and his behavioral record…
Lucas, exasperated: I’m guessing stealing a car didn’t help!
Jack frowns. It’s clear he didn’t want to get Lucas involved if he could help it, and seeing this stressed reaction from him is exactly why. But Eric placates them both, reminding them that the fight isn’t over until it’s over. They will be able to brainstorm a way to fix this -- it’s just going to take a concerted effort.
Eric: We will be able to make this work. But it’s going to take a team effort, and total cooperation. You have to trust us, Lucas, and you have to be willing to cooperate. Can you do that? Can you work with us?
What a question, and posed to the notorious school troublemaker at that. But Lucas doesn’t want to leave AAA -- let alone be forced out. He sighs, tilting his head back and swallowing his pride before nodding.
Lucas: Okay. Yeah. [ serious ] Just tell me what to do.
He looks to Jack, meeting his eyes. Ready to do whatever it takes.
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
Charlie is at his locker, relaying the rejection by his own sister to Riley. She’s leaned back against the lockers, listening sympathetically as he points out another crappy addition to what has been a crappy last couple of weeks.
Along those lines, Riley questions if Charlie still thinks he might transfer to a different school. He hasn’t heard back from Haverford yet, but is he still seriously considering the notion?
Charlie, diplomatically: Given that Zay and I were able to lay everything out there and at least confront the reality of our situation, I don’t think it’s really a necessary maneuver anymore. I mean, the situation is far from ideal, but that I can deal with. I’ve been living in far from ideal my whole life.
Riley: Sad, but sort of inspiring, I guess.
Charlie: I will admit though… it was kind of nice, going through that whole process. Just going out there, you know, proving that I could do things. That I was capable. [ smiling to himself ] If anything, at least I came away with that.
Riley mirrors his smile. Then they’re back on the subject of prom, Charlie lamenting that he doesn’t see what the point is of going if he can’t be there with the person he would actually want to spend it with.
Riley: Considering my ideal date has literally been banned from all school activities and therefore can go nowhere near it, I think I can say I relate.
Charlie: Tragic.
Charlie mentions what his sister said about not making it that deep and just going with friends, and this seems to strike something in Riley. A smile drifts onto her face.
Charlie: Oh no. I know that look. What are you thinking?
Riley: Just that dear Rosamund might have a point. If we are going to be miserable and repressed all night long, then we should at least be miserable in good company.
Charlie: … I don’t know if I like where this is going…
Riley turns to face him, a mischievous smile on her face. She leans in conspiratorially -- her delivery would be more convincing though if she wasn’t so inherently cute.
Riley: Charlie Gardner! [ in a whisper ] Will you go to prom with me?
Charlie stares at her, expression betraying nothing. She matches his gaze, wiggling her eyebrows. Then he can’t help but crack a smile.
Charlie: Well when you look at me like that, how could I say no…
Riley grins, bouncing on her feet and lightly punching him on the shoulder.
INT. AAA - BLACK BOX THEATER - DAY
The first step to putting Lucas in less jeopardy -- actually participating in class. He’s meeting with HARPER BURGESS to discuss how to make his optics better in that regard. Unfortunately, there’s really only one thing he can do…
Harper: If you do even one performance, then at least you’d have something to point to if the case attempts to jump down your throat.
True. Although he looks like he’d rather die, Lucas reluctantly accepts that point. So it’s official -- he’ll be performing a number this week!
Harper: It’s for the best, actually. Everyone else is so consumed with prom fever, they won’t even remember it happened.
Zay: Are you kidding? It’s Lucas James Friar. No one is ever going to forget this.
Lucas: Yeah, um, [ pointing to Zay ] what is he doing here again?
Harper gestures Zay forward to join them. She explains that considering Lucas is literally starting from scratch, he’s going to need help when it comes to choreography. And singing. And well… basically all of it. She figured Zay is one of their best performers and far more willing to lend a hand than, say, Maya. If Lucas wants a chance of pulling off a decent performance, having his help would be his best bet.
Harper: That is, of course, if you’re up for it, Zay.
Zay: Honestly, I would welcome the distraction. It’s been… an interesting few weeks.
So that’s that. We’ve got the team, we’ve got the plan -- time to make shit happen! Even if it kills Lucas in the process. As the backbeat floats in…
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “I Think He Knows” as performed by Taylor Swift || Performed by Dylan Orlando (feat. Asher Garcia)
Two AMBITION firsts in one, as Dylan kicks off his first mostly solo performance by bringing Taylor Swift into the song catalogue. He starts off at his locker, giving us a glimpse into the interior which despite the mess is basically as bursting with love as he is -- full of photos of his friends, his family, and Asher.
Of course, there’s Asher.
And that’s what he’s focused on as he slides into the pre-chorus (“He’s got that boyish look that I like in a man, I am an architect I’m drawing up the plans”). When he sings “It’s like I’m seventeen nobody understands,” he sure means it, because he is seventeen, and nobody does understand. Whew, Taylor really just knows how to write ‘em!
Then he launches into dance, strutting his way down the halls with a definite spring in his step. It’s nowhere near as elaborate as performer choreography would be, but it’s charming and just sharp enough that it’s clear Dylan’s got some real talent.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Dylan takes the number into the auditorium, making his way over to the prop loft where he’s guaranteed to find Asher. There’s a brief sequence he basically serenades Asher from down below, scaling the fence around the set pieces until he convinces him to come down. The whole thing is dynamic and fun and a little bit theatrical, humoring their classmates as they watch from the stage before class.
On the bridge, Asher takes over the vocals, taking Dylan’s hand and leading him through the backstage areas. Dylan follows along happily, waiting until they’ve reached the other side of the stage to pull him back towards him. Asher presses their foreheads together (“Where we gonna go… I whisper in the dark… where we gonna go…”), then drifts away as Dylan belts out the note that throws us back into the chorus.
The final swell of the song takes place center stage, surrounded by classmates and with nothing but good energy. The techies are laughing along, cheering, and even the performers are enjoying the rendition. Dylan and Asher sway together in a circle with the beat, doing a final spin under Dylan’s arm before falling back together and breaking into laughter to take it home. The A class breaks into applause, Asher pulling Dylan down into a quick kiss.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you prom-pose!
In the high energy after the performance, Nigel casts another glance towards Jade across the stage. It seems like he really might do something, and she definitely acknowledged his eye contact… but then nothing.
Isadora also notices the exchange, curiosity piqued. She raises her eyebrows, Sherlock brain turning before Maya pulls her into a conversation about how the twink performance was clearly not better than hers and Zay’s… right? Right?
INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - MASTER BEDROOM - NIGHT
Isadora brings up the notion while hanging out with Maya and Riley, the three of them spending an evening together to map out prom logistics. She questions if either of them noticed it too, or whether Nigel has ever even shown interest in their classmates before. Maya claims he’s never dated anyone in their class, and Riley states that maybe he’s just shy.
Maya scoffs, focused on painting her toenails a shiny silver.
Maya: Look, Nigel is lean meat. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s talented, but the boy has no moxy. He has let Farkle walk all over him for three years, when if he just put like, a crumb of effort in he may have already had a lead by this point.
Riley: You know, it could be that he just… doesn’t care that much.
Maya: Well that was his first mistake.
The point is, if Nigel does have interest in Jade -- which Maya doesn’t get, because she forgets who Jade is half the time -- then it’s more than likely he will do absolutely nothing about it.
Isadora: That’s too bad.
Maya: I mean… I guess.
Riley: Maybe they just want to go with their friends. Prom doesn’t have to be inherently romantic, you know. [ off Isadora’s nod ] I mean, I’m going with Charlie, and --
Maya: Wait. [ sitting up ] You and Charlie are going together?
Riley: Yeah. But, like, just as friends.
Maya: Oh… oh. That’s… interesting.
There’s a plot twist. If Riley’s unnerved by Maya’s tone, she has the right to be. It’s an odd moment, and it’s only subdued by Cory calling for the girls from the living room. There’s a surprise here for them!
INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - NIGHT
And what a surprise it is. Maya practically screams when she finds KATY HART in the living area, having just arrived with VALERIE DE LA CRUZ. She runs over and launches into her arms, the two of them hugging tightly.
Maya: Oh my God, what are you doing here?
Katy: Val helped me. Paid my way, so that I could be here for prom.
Isadora: No way?
Valerie: Oh, it was nothing. Hardly a penny out of my pocket. I know how much it meant to me to be here for this weekend -- figured the least I could do would be to allow a good friend the same opportunity.
Certainly no arguments here. Maya and Katy hug again, elated. Cory and Riley exchange smiles, Cory pulling her to his side and into a hug.
Valerie pulls Isadora aside, greeting her and stating that she wants to do something special after prom. Like a girls night, deglam and rejuvenate and catch up. Deglam being key, because Valerie knows Isadora is going to look stunning. She can’t wait!
Isadora is totally open to the idea. She nods, matching her enthusiasm.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Jack is at his desk, going through the Bradford paperwork. He’s flagging and highlighting every potential point he might have to refute in an argument, emails open on his desktop of pitches he’s going to send to school board members for support if the complaint breaks.
Eric pokes his head in and knocks on the door pointedly.
Eric: Knock knock.
Jack: Who’s there?
Eric: Stop obsessing.
Jack: Okay, we’re done with the bit --
Eric smiles, leaning against the doorframe. He knows Jack is concerned, but he’s already thought so extensively about this problem. He needs to take a mental break from it, before he burns himself out. Besides, there’s always the chance that it won’t even ever go public.
Yes, a chance… but a chance isn’t a guarantee. Jack claims he just wants to be prepared for the worst, which Eric can’t exactly argue against.
What he can do is change the subject. He states he wanted to double check that they’re both still on for chaperoning the dance on Saturday. Jack confirms, wondering why plans would have changed.
Eric: Well… you know, given your own personal circumstances, I just figured you might not want to --
Jack: Eric, I’m fine. [ with a shrug ] After all, what better distraction is there from the shambles of your personal life than watching out for a bunch of rowdy, dramatic teenagers all night long? Can’t think of anything better.
Eric: At least your humor is still intact.
Jack makes a face, accenting the point.
Zay, pre-lap: Okay, literally, what the hell is the matter with you?
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Zay is attempting to teach Lucas choreography, but it’s clearly far from easy. Not that that’s surprising, but it’s evident that Lucas was not meant to be a dancer. It’s a challenge unlike anything Zay has ever confronted before, regardless of how hard Lucas is trying.
Zay: I don’t -- like, is your brain connected to your limbs? How is this not clicking?
Riley enters, brightening when she finds them both. She asks how everything is going, and the look that both of them give her basically answers her question for them.
Riley: I hope I’m not interrupting.
Zay: No, you know what? It’s good. I need a break. Rome wasn’t built in a God damn free period. [ pointing to Lucas ] Don’t go anywhere with your two left feet, Fry Pan.
Lucas holds out his arms. What do you want from me? As Zay marches off, Riley tries to hold back her smile as she joins Lucas at center stage.
Riley: So seems like it’s going good, then.
Lucas: Oh, haha. [ making a face ] You know -- and this may shock you -- I’m not a dancer.
Riley, gasping: No. You’re kidding?
Lucas: I know, I know. Brand new information.
Riley smiles, asking to take a look at Zay’s choreography sheets. Lucas hands them over, Riley hopping onto the stacked acting blocks and reading them over for herself. He watches her as she reads, only shifting his gaze to his feet when she glances up to look at him.
She says that all things considered, the choreography isn’t so bad. He just has to keep working at it, and the whole thing is pretty low stakes anyway.
Riley: What even made you decide to do a performance? I have to admit, I never thought I would see the day.
Lucas: … well, with everything I did this year, figure it’s the least I can do. Just putting the karmic cycle back in balance.
Riley: You believe in karma?
Lucas: Could be. Either way, mine is shit. Objectively speaking.
Riley gives him a look. She glances back down at the papers and then states she’s sure he’ll be fine, and she for one is looking forward to the show. He rolls his eyes.
Lucas: You know, they have words for people who demonstrate ridiculous belief in unreliable things. It’s called blind faith. Usually it’s reserved for important things though. Gods, governments. Conventional belief systems.
Riley: Well, I’m nothing if not unconventional.
Lucas, quietly: Yeah.
The tension between them is palpable, even with the fair amount of space between them. They hold each other’s gaze, another one of those moments where they can’t seem to look away from one another. If it were possible, they might just stand there and look at each other forever.
Fortunately -- or maybe unfortunately, depending on your perspective -- Zay keeps that from happening. He reenters and tells Lucas to get ready to run it again, totally oblivious to their lingering moment. Riley hops off the acting blocks as Lucas clears his throat, directing his attention back to Zay.
Riley: I’ll get out of your way. Good luck. [ smiling ] Both of you.
Zay waves her off, sending her on her way. Once she’s gone, he turns back to Lucas and lets out a grand sigh.
Lucas: Now you’re just being a bitch.
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
Jade is in the costume department, ignoring the task of organizing the leftover fabrics from this year and painstakingly attempting to fix the project she’s been working on all week. When someone enters she jumps and tries to hide the garment, straightening up and nervously looking towards the doors.
It’s not who she was expecting. Isadora enters, pushing a costume rack.
Isadora: Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you.
Jade: No, it’s okay. I’m just um… it’s fine.
Isadora nods, bringing the rack all the way in. She explains that she got a head start on the inventorying of the costumes, and all the ones on the rack here are finished. She intends to put them back after theatre lab, if that’s alright.
Jade, surprised: Um… sure. Yeah, that would be helpful.
Isadora: Great. [ a beat ] I really am sorry, Jade. It wasn’t intentional, but I know I dropped the ball when it comes to pulling my weight on our team. [ hesitant ] And our friendship.
Well, Jade isn’t going to tell her otherwise. She shrugs lightly, acknowledging the apology but not necessarily accepting it quite yet. It’ll take time, and Isadora gets that. But she’s said her piece, and now all she can do is keep working to make reparations.
As she’s heading out, though, she decides there’s one more thing she wants to say.
Isadora: About Nigel.
Jade: Huh?
Isadora: Nigel. If you want to go to prom with him… then you should just ask him yourself. Don’t wait around for some boy to do the job right when you’re perfectly capable of doing it -- and probably better. He’s chicken, but the way he’s been looking at you… I’m pretty sure he would say yes.
Something to think about, at least. Jade considers it as Isadora exits, leaving her alone with the costumes.
INT. AAA - CAFETERIA - DAY
Riley has joined Charlie, Clarissa, and Haley for lunch. As they chat the notion of Charlie and Riley going to prom together comes back up, Haley visibly taken aback by the reveal. She starts to question how that came to be, obviously struggling to accept it, when their conversation is totally derailed by Maya paying a visit to their table.
Although she’s all bright smiles, the tone is mildly threatening as Maya confronts Riley and Charlie. She also is questioning their union for promenade, wondering if their admittedly perfect cookie-cutter image is intent on also campaigning for prom court. Because it would sure be a shame for them to have to go head to head…
Maya might be built like a pixie, but the threat behind her words resonates loud and clear. Charlie shakes his head, stammering to correct her thinking.
Charlie: Oh, we’re not --
Riley: We weren’t planning to --
Yeah, no. It’s a no. This seems to appease Maya, who relaxes and turns back on the charm. Still, her friendly laughter still feels ominous as she wishes them the best, and reminds them not to forget to vote for her and Zay for prom king and queen come Saturday evening.
Clarissa shakes her head, reiterating her former stance.
Clarissa: Nowhere and nothing is safe.
INT. AAA - ERIC’S OFFICE - DAY
Eric is putting on his most encouraging counselor smile, sitting across from Isadora and Farkle. He’s just wrapping up a pitch, stating that considering they’ve become such good friends in the last few months, he thought maybe it would be a good idea for them to go to prom as a duo. Just as friends. Pals, looking out for one another! Good, old, promenade buddies.
Farkle seems entertained by the mere suggestion. Isadora looks unamused.
Isadora: So you want me to babysit him.
Eric: That’s -- that’s not what I said.
Farkle: That’s basically what you said.
Eric tries to save face, but he forgot he’s dealing with the two most intuitive (and judgmental) students in the junior class. They see right through his facade, recognizing this tactic for exactly what it is.
Isadora: Also, what makes you assume I don’t already have a date?
Eric: … well do you?
[ Farkle looks to Isadora, raising his eyebrows. When she huffs, he cracks a smirk. ]
Isadora: No, but that’s not the point.
Eric relents, talking to them straight. Yes, they want Farkle to have company at the dance due to his history over the last few months. Ideally, this would be a small ask, considering they are friends and would likely be hanging out at the event anyway.
Eric: You are friends, yes?
Isadora: Request pending.
Farkle: I think of it more as intellectual sparring partners.
There’s really no good way to respond to that. Eric requests that they consider the option, as it would be a favor to him if nothing else. Give him a little peace of mind.
That’s just the selling point he needed to flex. Isadora glances between them, then sighs, claiming Farkle will pick her up when she decides he will.
Eric is thrilled, and Farkle doesn’t look all that opposed either. This, he claims, is a good thing. They’re thwarting problems before they even arise. No problems for junior prom this year!
INT. AAA - HALLWAY - DAY
Clarissa runs into Charlie, concerned. She takes his arm.
Clarissa: Problem. Big problem.
When Charlie asks her what the heck is going on, she states that Haley has finally broken down. She’s up in the costume loft and is refusing to talk, and she’s effectively decided she is not going to prom. Whatever crazy plague is running through their class, it’s finally hit her.
Charlie sighs, nodding and telling Clarissa he’ll handle it. He takes off at a jog towards the auditorium.
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
Haley is sitting amongst the costumes, wiping tears from her cheeks. When Charlie pulls himself into the loft it almost makes it worse, Haley shaking her head and telling him to go away.
Haley: As if this could not get any more humiliating.
Charlie: Hey, don’t worry, I have had… my fair share of breakdowns up here.
He settles down next to her, in the exact spot he was crying just an episode ago. He waits patiently for her to acknowledge him again, asking her why she’s so upset. Clarissa told him she wasn’t going to prom -- what’s that all about?
Haley shrugs, huffing and avoiding eye contact with him. She shakily admits that some part of her always thought… maybe it was stupid, but he really doesn’t get it. They can be friends for years, spend all this time together, and he still has no idea. And she just… she feels like such an idiot. All of this is just so stupid.
Charlie pauses, searching for how to tread cautiously.
Charlie: If we’re being honest with each other… I know.
Haley: You -- you know. You know that I --
Charlie: Yeah. I have for a while.
Haley: Oh God. [ hiding her head in her knees ] That’s even worse.
Charlie: It’s not, Hales. You can’t help who you like. [ a beat ] Although, still being honest… I don’t really think you do.
Haley lifts her head, frowning at him. She asks what he means, and Charlie tries to figure out the best way to articulate what he’s thinking.
Charlie: Believe me, I speak from experience here, but I think it’s… really easy to become in love with the idea of something. Things that seem easy, and perfect, if they could just work out a certain way. So we fall in love with those ideals, rather than the way things actually are.
Haley: So, what? You think I’m just making everything up?
Charlie: No, I believe some of it is real. I believe you love me -- and that makes sense, because I love you, too. We’ve been friends for years, like you said, and I can’t imagine what my time at Triple A would be like without you. I don’t want to.
[ Haley wipes her eyes. ]
Charlie: But I think, realistically, that’s all we’re ever going to be. And I think you know that, too -- it’s just safer to keep things the way they are now. Where you never get what you think you want, but then you never get hurt, either.
Haley: … okay, you’re kind of freaking me out here. Get out of my head.
Charlie, laughing: Like I said, talking from experience.
A quiet moment passes between them. Charlie goes on to state that Haley shouldn’t give up her junior prom, especially not over him. They’ll both be there, and they’ll still get to spend the evening together with Clarissa and Riley and the rest of their friends. It’ll be fun, even if it’s not the fantasy they imagine in their heads.
Charlie: And as for the rest of it… I guess you and I will both just have to see what the future holds. Rather than hiding behind expectations we know we’re never gonna meet.
A tough pill to swallow, but important. Haley exhales and then nods, giving up. Trading out the fantasy, but perhaps for the better. She gives him a smile.
Haley: I do love you, Charlie Gardner. That much is true.
Charlie returns the beam, accepting the hug she gives him.
INT. AAA - BLACK BOX THEATER - DAY
Jade is standing outside the black box, watching Nigel chat with Yindra and NICK YOGI. Dylan and Asher stand behind her, hyping her up as she gears up to do the impossible.
Asher: Just be yourself. Be straight-forward.
Dylan: Go in there and get what you came for.
Jade: Right. Sure. [ a beat ] What if he says no?
Dylan: Sock him.
Asher glares at him, Dylan shrugging before smiling to himself. Asher takes the more serious approach, bracing Jade’s shoulders from behind.
Asher: If he says no, then it’s his loss. You’re Jade Beamon --
Dylan: Jade motherfucking Beamon!
Asher: And he would be lucky to get even an evening of your time. [ patting her shoulders ] Go get him, queen.
Dylan lightly nudges her forward, Jade taking a deep breath. Then she marches into the classroom, approaching Nigel and tapping him on the shoulder.
When he turns around and meets her eyes, for a second it seems like she’s going to run. But she squares her shoulders, clears her throat, and speaks as confidently as she can.
Jade: Nigel.
Nigel, surprised: Jade?
Jade: We should go to prom together. If you want to. I mean -- you should want to go with me. But only if you do. The point is -- will you go to prom with me? Maybe?
The back and forth between assertive and timid is jarring, but also quite charming. Nigel takes a moment to fully absorb what’s happening, but the smile that blooms across his face is near instantaneous.
Nigel: Yes. Yeah, I’d -- I’d like that a lot.
Jade: Great! I mean, um, great. Good. I’ll text you with details.
Nigel: Okay. Great.
Jade: Great. Okay… great.
Jade spins on her heel and marches back out, Yindra and Yogi exchanging wild looks. But Nigel is fully endeared, obviously not at all opposed to this turn of events.
As Jade escapes back into the hall, Dylan and Asher mob her with congratulatory hugs and pats on the back! She did it! Jade Beamon is going to prom with Nigel Chey, baby!
In tone with the celebratory mood, the bold brass opening floats in…
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “I’ve Gotta Be Me” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by Lucas James Friar (feat. Zay Babineaux)
Another AMBITION first for the bucket list, Lucas gives his first almost solo performance, with a Broadway number, and that isn’t fueled by pure rage. Zay is on stage with him to help with the choreography, but in some ways that’s a nice way to help take the pressure off. It’s sort of like a dress rehearsal rather than an actual performance.
And look… it’s not great. Lucas is not a performer, and he was never pretending to be. But it’s passable, and honestly the vocals aren’t half bad. There are even a couple of rare, fleeting moments where it seems like he might actually be having fun.
The real fun is for the audience though. His classmates are near entranced by the spectacle, having watched Lucas do nothing but grump and roll his eyes for three years straight -- and especially the majority of this year. Farkle is watching with his jaw dropped open, blankly stunned. Riley is hiding her fond grin behind her hands, shaking her head. Isadora is openly laughing, but with him rather than at him. Even Jack and Eric came to watch, thoroughly amused, and maybe a little bit proud.
The techies are cheering along the entire time, and when Lucas gets through that last note and hits those last steps with Zay, they leap to their feet and give him a standing ovation. Given the year he’s had, the uproarious applause sort of feel well-deserved.
He survived, God damn it, he survived!
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
Jade is leading Asher into the floor level of the costume department by both hands, the latter having been instructed to keep his eyes closed. He’s playing along, but nervously, reminding Jade that he hates surprises and also hates not being able to see.
Asher: You know going blind is one of my anxieties.
Jade: Everything is one of your anxieties. But hold on, we’re almost there.
She gets him right in front of where she’s hung up her latest project, pulling back and instructing him to open his eyes. He does, seeing the surprise and expression growing shocked.
It’s a pair of suit jackets, custom-made for junior prom. They align with the theme in terms of the subtle allusions to stars and shimmering elements factored into the design, but they’re inverse in terms of colors -- one mainly creme-colored with darker accents, and the other dark with lighter accents. Matching, but unique. And clear labors of love, from a seamstress who knows her craft.
Jade explains how she got the idea to make them, how she wanted to make sure they were clearly a matching set like Asher and Dylan, but also distinct from one another.
Jade: We just used to talk all the time about how fun it would be to have custom stuff for prom, when we got there one day. And you used to always talk about what you and Dylan could wear, but then would get all embarrassed, as if that was silly. Like it would never happen, that you couldn’t last that long. [ a beat ] Well, we got here, and I just figured after the hell year we’ve had…
Asher is staring at them, speechless. He’s tearing up, at a loss for what to do. Jade takes the impending waterworks as a bad sign, searching for a way to recover.
Jade: I mean, if there’s something you’d like better, you can just tell me. Or if you already picked out tuxes, that’s totally fine too, you don’t have to wear them --
Asher interrupts her nervous rambles, barreling her with a hug. The embrace is tight, and although there are tears the tone in his voice conveys that they’re happy.
Asher: I love you so much.
Jade beams, getting choked up too. She hugs him back.
Jade, teary but laughing: I love you, too.
INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - NIGHT
Prom night is upon us! There’s a flurry of activity at the Matthews apartment, making it more lively than its been in months.
AUGGIE MATTHEWS is there to help Riley get ready and spend the weekend with Cory. Riley is obviously happy that he’s there, grinning when she emerges from the hall in her gorgeous lavender gown and he jumps up in excitement. She questions where their dad is and Auggie nods towards the fire escape, Cory visible through the window.
EXT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - FIRE ESCAPE - NIGHT
Riley delicately climbs her way out onto the balcony, Cory going to help her through when he notices she’s trying. Once they’ve got her upright, he gets a good look at her and goes soft with fatherly pride.
Cory, softly: You look lovely.
Riley smiles, both of them adjusting further out onto the fire escape. They take a moment to look at the scenery of their street, throwing a couple of jokes back and forth about how she’s going to prom with Charlie and whether or not Cory should be worried (he should not at all).
After a moment of quiet, Riley pecks up the courage to speak on what she really needs to say.
Riley: When mom called a couple weeks back, it wasn’t just to check in. She, um… [ off his wary expression ] She wants me to come upstate, too. For senior year.
Cory: … oh. [ swallowing hard ] Oh.
Riley: I’m not telling you because I’ve made any sort of decision, yet, or anything like that. I’m going to take the time to really… really think about it, and make sure I make the right choice for me. [ a beat ] But I just… wanted you to know what was going on. And also that no matter what happens, I’m still with you. I’m not going to leave you alone.
Cory nods, trying his best to accept it. Riley hesitates, deciding if she wants to continue.
Riley: Regardless of what I choose though… I need to be clear that I can’t be in the middle anymore. I love you both, but I am tearing myself apart trying to keep up with the constant back and forth. Trying to keep things civil in this family when I don’t think that’s supposed to be my job.
Cory: It’s not… Riley, I never meant for --
Riley: I know. And part of it is me -- feels like I’m always looking for other things to focus on and fix rather than myself. [ with a deep breath ] But I can’t keep living like that. I need to start focusing on myself… and that comes with setting boundaries. I love you, dad, but I can’t carry your baggage with mom anymore. It’s your fight, not mine.
Cory hesitates, obviously feeling guilty. Then he nods, assuring her that he’ll try his best to remember that. He doesn’t want to make this any harder for her than it already is. And if she’s trying to get him to hear her, then he’s listening. He really is going to try.
Riley smiles lightly, leaning forward to pull him into a hug. He returns the embrace, stating that he’s grateful he gets to be here with her on this important night. They pull apart, Cory fixing a piece of her hair.
Cory: Absolutely beautiful.
She smiles again.
INT. MATTHEWS APARTMENT - MASTER BEDROOM - NIGHT
Katy and Maya are sharing a similar bonding moment. Katy has taken over eyeliner duties, adjusting Maya’s makeup with her expert hand. She claims Maya has a tendency for overdoing it, which makes her laugh.
Maya: Tell me something I don’t know.
When she’s all finished, Katy looks at her daughter lovingly. She looks stunning, in a beautiful silver and white dress and blonde hair glossy as ever.
Katy: Like bona fide royalty. [ touching her chin ] No matter what the votes say.
Maya grins. She pulls her into an embrace.
INT. MINKUS HOME - NIGHT
JENNIFER MINKUS is nitpicking at Farkle, brushing off the shoulders of his navy suit jacket. He tells her to stop fussing, but she requests just one more second. She reaches up on instinct to fix his hair then remembers there’s not as much there as there used to be. Then she smiles, bracing his shoulders.
Jennifer: Beautiful boy. Perfect.
The housekeeper claims that the driver is downstairs, so Farkle should start heading out. STUART MINKUS shares an exchange with him as he’s in the entryway, offering him a Minkus good luck charm. It’s a silver lapel pin, a little crest shape related to their family coat of arms.
Stuart carefully pins it to Farkle’s lapel.
Stuart: You know, I wore this when I went on my first date with your mother -- and look where we are now.
Farkle, scoffing: It’s not -- this isn’t that kind of…
He doesn’t finish the sentence, letting it trail off. Stuart’s expression is amused, claiming he doesn’t quite buy it, but relenting for now.
When he finishes and smooths the lapel to crisp perfection, he takes a moment to really take in his son. Still with him, still standing in spite of everything that’s unfolded. It’s clear that there’s something he wants to say to him, heavy with the same weight that him sleeping at his hospital bedside all through his recovery held.
Yet, the words still don’t exist. Emotional expression has never been paramount in the Minkus household, and old habits die hard.
Instead, he pats his shoulder bracingly and wishes him luck. Jennifer comes to join Stuart as Farkle steps out, both of them wishing him a good time. Have some fun! This is your night of freedom, soak it up for all it’s worth!
Isadora, pre-lap: I don’t see how much fun it could be when we’re being watched by faculty all night long.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - ISADORA’S ROOM - NIGHT
Isadora is seated at the vanity in Eric’s guest room, the space she’s taken over while staying with him. It seems that per their last conversation, Eric is keeping to his word with Valerie and is giving Isadora an actual legitimate place to stay in the mean time rather than Blue’s couch.
She’s sitting impatiently as Lucas stands behind her, braiding pieces of her hair to complete her prom look. A hidden talent, perhaps? It looks pretty, to say the least. He plainly states that she’ll be having more fun than him no matter what, there’s little doubt about that.
As he wraps up the last braid, Isadora pulls on her Converse and carefully gets to her feet.
Lucas: What, no heels?
Isadora: Are you kidding me? I think I’d break my ankles.
Lucas: Very “I’m not like other girls” of you.
Isadora: This is not about faux-originality, this is about my comfort and safety. As well as the safety of others.
The shoes hardly put a dent in the overall ensemble anyway. She’s in a gorgeous dark blue number, accented with a sheer layer of star patterns and custom designed by one of Valerie’s designer friends. It’s certainly not her typical ensemble, but she makes it work. Beautiful, but still a force to be reckoned with.
Lucas smiles, lightly punching her shoulder. He tells her she looks good, and she nudges him back before saying thanks.
Lucas, more serious: Sorry I can’t be there. To be there for you.
Isadora: It’s whatever. Be sad for your own sake, not mine.
Eric calls for Isadora from the hall, the two of them heading towards the door.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Eric is adjusting his suit and tie in the hall mirror when there’s a curt knock at the door. He goes to open it, delighted to greet Farkle on the other side. He gestures him inside, Farkle awkwardly making his way in and stuffing his hands in his pockets.
Both of them soften when Isadora emerges from the hall, obviously exceeding expectations. Eric tells her that she looks great -- Farkle says nothing, because he has no words. How are you supposed to react when your intellectual sparring partner shows up looking like that?
For a moment, all of them just hang awkwardly in the living area. Lucas clears his throat, scratching at his neck. That’s as good a cue as any, and Eric claims they should get going if they’re going to get there early to help set up. The price they pay, carpooling with a chaperone.
Eric ushers them out, giving Lucas a pat on the shoulder and telling him he’ll drop him off at his destination for the first half of the evening. And away they go! As their door closes…
INT. GARDNER HOME - NIGHT
Another opens, Riley standing bright and smiling on the doorstep of the Gardner home. AMBROSE GARDNER takes care to greet her cheerfully and help her inside, asking if there’s anything he can get her.
She should be grateful that the sanest member of the family met her first. ELEANOR GARDNER excitedly comes in from the kitchen moments later, greeting her enthusiastically and wanting to know a million things about her. Of course, they’ve heard so much about her already -- feels like Charlie is always talking about her!
From the living room, Rosie and DAISY GARDNER watch curiously.
Daisy: She’s pretty.
Rosie: Yeah.
Daisy: How did Charlie manage to get that?
Rosie: Shh.
As if summoned, Charlie rushes down the stairs. He looks charming in his relatively simple tuxedo, the touches of purple in his tie and pocket square perfectly accenting Riley’s dress. She gives him a hug as he reaches the bottom of the stairs, all of the Gardners eyeing them as they interact in front of them for the first time.
And to be fair, they look lovely. They seem near classic, the picture of prom perfection… but it’s so… boring. Whatever spark of flirtation Eleanor thinks she’s seeing between them, it’s absolutely nothing.
Still, she insists on getting some photos before they go. Charlie is embarrassed, but he allows it. As they’re assembling against the wall by the door, he leans over to whisper to her.
Charlie: Sorry about this. You look great, by the way.
Riley: Thanks. You too. And it’s fine. These’ll be great pictures to show my kids someday.
The choice of “my” rather than “our” is very pointed. Charlie gives her a look, elbowing her and earning a giggle out of her. Eleanor captures the moment, claiming that’s the perfect one.
Then Charlie tries to plot their escape, claiming they really should get going. Ambrose thanks Riley for driving -- Eleanor jokingly warns them not to stay out too late! A-wink!
Charlie looks like he’d rather be dead. Riley holds back her laughter as they escape into the night, the whole family sending them off cheerfully.
Once they’re gone, Ambrose and Eleanor exchange thoughtful looks.
Ambrose: She seems nice.
Eleanor, “knowingly:” Mhm… pretty…
Yeah, she really thinks this is something else. As she saunters back towards the kitchen…
INT. ORLANDO HOME - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “That’s What I Like” as performed by Bruno Mars || Instrumental
The techie pre-prom gathering is in full swing, the techie jams playlist on shuffle as they get ready together and mingle. Some of their parents are also in attendance (and likely to have a party of their own once they get them the hell out of there), namely LEVI GARCIA, EMILY GARCIA, and of course RANDALL ORLANDO.
Randall subtly interrupts a conversation between Lucas and Jade, where she’s just finished commenting on how nice it is for this gathering to be snapback free. It’s true that Lucas does stick out like a sore thumb, in his plain old blue flannel and jeans rather than dressed up like the rest of them.
The two of them exchange a bit of small talk before Randall gets to the point, asking Lucas about how things are going. Considering the last he heard about everything was literally picking up Dylan from the police precinct because of the joy ride, it stands to reason that he would be interested in knowing since he’s let Lucas back in his home since then.
To his credit, Randall has also been more of a dad to Lucas than his own, in spite of how avoidant Lucas can be. So he tells him the truth, stating that it’s been better but it’s also definitely been worse. He apologizes for what happened with the joy ride, and assures him that he’s banking on that sort of thing never happening again. Randall gives him a nod and a pat on the shoulder, approving.
The moment is interrupted as Nate gets their attention, using a cooking spoon as a faux microphone as he plays MC. He thanks them all for coming (which Dave and Jeff jeer at) before claiming he has the distinct pleasure of introducing their host and his paramour for the evening, showing off their custom-made, never before seen Jade Beamon originals.
Nate: First up -- you know may know him as Dyl Pickle, vlogger extraordinaire, the deviant who once stuck a whopping thirty-two sticky notes to Shawn Hunter’s back in one class period. He’s as gay as they come, in every sense of the word. Host of the evening and renowned “kissing expert” --
Asher, from upstairs: NATE!
Nate: What? He told me to say it! Anyway, let’s give it up for the one-of-a-kind Dylan Blake Orlando.
All of them cheer theatrically as Dylan comes downstairs, sliding down the banister and hopping onto the bottom step. He shows off the suit jacket Jade made, looking even fresher and fun actually on him than just hanging in the costume loft. He spins and hams it up for a moment, then backs off so Nate can continue.
Nate: Equally as effervescent, our other star of the evening is not to be discounted. He’s smart, he’s sharp, he’s the scariest person you will ever meet if you piss him off or forget to organize the paints in alphabetical order. King of production design, prop mix master, puts the Ash in Ash Cash Money --
Dylan, taking the spoon: The love of my life --
Nate, taking it back: Hey, this is my gig! I didn’t ask for ad-libs.
Jeff: Drunk on power…
Nate: Anyway, let’s give it up ladies and gentlemen for the only one of us with any class, Asher L. Garcia!
Asher jogs down the stairs, looking equally as iconic in his custom suit jacket. He does a small spin as well to give the item it’s due moment, Dylan cheering the loudest of all of them.
Randall: Very nice, very good. Now, could I get a moment with my “gay vlogger sticky note” son?
The techies all cheer and laugh at his take, Dylan sliding across the hardwood to meet him. Jade and Asher link up, the former taking his hands and practically bouncing as she proclaims how good the suits turned out. They look amazing!
Lucas looks around at all of his friends, glammed up and excited. Distinctly left out of the excitement, only this time not by his own choice. Somehow, that’s worse.
He’s pulled out of it as Nate declares they still have one order of business, the seven of them regrouping. Dylan slips back into the circle between Asher and Lucas.
Nate: Now, as with any good tradition, we have some firsts to establish. And this shit is important -- it may be the most important thing we do in our lives at Triple A.
Jade: Speak for yourself.
Nate: As we know, the prom court institution at Adams is royally corrupt. It’s the same shit every single year.
Dave: Nothing new.
Jeff: Same old shit.
Nate: And to that, the techie tots say no more. We will be crowning our own reigning royalty this year, and that honor happens tonight. Without further ado --
For what it’s worth, the only two that don’t seem to know what’s happening are Asher and Dylan. They watch in confusion as Dave retrieves two pin cases from his interior pocket, handing them to Jade and Lucas respectively. Then they turn to face them, grinning wide at the stunned expressions on Dylan and Asher’s faces.
Nate: Congratulations, Pickle and Bird Bones. You’re fucking royalty.
Jade and Lucas move forward, pinning the brand new charms to Asher and Dylan’s lapels, respectively. The pins are small medals, the band being monochrome like techie uniforms and the metal piece a small crown.
The true kings have been crowned. Whatever happens next hardly matters.
Jade: Okay, we have to get out of here before Asher cries again.
Randall and the parents swoop in, insisting on one group photo before they all head out to wreak havoc. At first Lucas steps out of the photo, allowing them their classy group photo, but then all of them shout for him to get in the picture as well.
EXT. ORLANDO HOME - NIGHT
Dave leads the charge down the steps to the “party van,” i.e. their techie van they use for Home Depot runs. On the steps, Dylan and Asher hang back and check in with Lucas one last time.
Asher: You sure you don’t want to come?
Dylan, sing-song: We could sneak you in...
Lucas knows they damn well mean it. But he waves them off, assuring them that he’ll be fine. They need to go have fun and not worry about him for a night.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Good Love (Feel Like This)” as performed by Sir, Please || Performed by Nigel Chey (feat. Dave Williams, Nick Yogi, and AAA Juniors)
And so it is. Asher gives him a pat on the arm and then they’re off, leaving Lucas on the steps alone. He watches his friends head out without him, bittersweet smile on his face.
As the groovy rock hit floats in…
INT. PROM VENUE - NIGHT
Prom roll up! The event is hopping, the large ballroom space beautifully decorated towards the stars theme and everyone’s appropriately matched outfits shimmering under the low lighting. The brightest lights are geared towards the DJ stage, which alternates between a sound system and live performances.
At present, Nigel is giving a riveting vocal performance while the junior and senior class parties on the dance floor. Dave is backing on guitar, Yogi on the keyboard, and other B Class students filling out the rest of the band.
Jade, Dylan, and Asher are right by the stage, Jade watching him perform with a mix of shyness and excitement. Every once in a while, he’ll look over at her and crack a smile.
Dylan and Asher are distracted when Isadora wanders over to join them, all of them immediately complimenting one another on their one-of-a-kind outfits. Dylan gives her a hug. Asher asks how it is being accompanied by Farkle Minkus, which Isadora claims isn’t terrible -- but it’s not particularly enchanting either.
Meanwhile, Farkle has just met up with Riley and Maya. They ask him how his evening is going so far -- is he having fun? It’s not too overwhelming, is it?
Farkle: Oh, yeah. Sweaty room, loud music, constant surveillance, date who didn’t even want to go with me. Time of my life, girls. Undoubtedly.
On the opposite side of the room, Charlie has just made his way over to the refreshments. He reaches for the ladle for the punch just at the same time as Zay, their hands brushing before they look up and lock eyes.
For a moment, neither of them say anything. They just take one another in -- well-groomed, nice tuxedos, the most they’ve even really seen of each other since the break-up -- before Zay manages to say something.
Zay: You look… classic.
Innocent enough. Charlie laughs nervously, nodding.
Charlie: And you look…
He can’t finish the sentence. What’s he going to say? No word is good enough. And where they are right now doesn’t allow for him to say what he’s actually thinking.
Thankfully, Maya swoops in and unwittingly throws him a life preserver. She interrupts their conversation, claiming that she needs for Zay to come dance with her lest people get the impression she can’t hold her own on the dance floor. She pays Charlie the same compliment in that he looks nice, before reminding him to vote Zay and Maya for prom king and queen!
Charlie: Okay, if you keep saying that, someone is going to murder you by the end of the night.
Maya: Attempted assassinations are just part of the job description.
Farkle regroups with Isadora, finding her amidst the crowd. The two of them stand in silence for a moment, absorbing the chaotic scene around them. Farkle eyes Jack and Eric across the room, talking to one another and not paying any attention to them, then leans down to whisper in Isadora’s ear.
Farkle: You wanna get out of here?
Isadora looks around at her classmates and teachers before her gaze lands on Farkle. She smiles, somewhere between a smirk and genuinely sweet.
EXT. COURTHOUSE - NIGHT
Valerie emerges from the courthouse, seemingly in much better spirits than the last time she was there. She inhales a deep breath of fresh air, blithe smile on her face.
INT. HOTEL SUITE - NIGHT
Katy opens the door to her hotel room, surprised to find Val standing on the other side. She’s carrying a bottle of champagne and doesn’t wait for an invitation to march inside. She tells Katy to grab a couple of glasses, they are celebrating!
Katy, uncertainly: Good news, I’m guessing?
Valerie: You know, in this industry, they tell you the most important thing is to hang on. Hang on by the skin of your teeth, dig your fingernails in, and never let go. Who would’ve known that applied to the rest of this crazy, mixed up world too?
Valerie pops the champagne and pours a glass for her and Katy, raising her glass.
Valerie: I persevered, and only good things have come from it. [ sublime ] Isadora is going to be mine. We’re going to be a real family.
Katy happily cheers to that, both of them taking a drink from their glasses. They settle down on the couch in the suite, Valerie absolutely giddy with the news. She can’t wait to tell Isadora. Katy can imagine -- she knows how important it is, having time with her baby girl.
An idea seems to strike Valerie in that moment, eyes widening. She reaches out and touches Katy’s arm, excited.
Valerie: You’ll come stay with us.
Katy: Wh -- what?
Valerie: Yes, yes, you’ll come back to New York and you’ll stay with us! You, me, Maya, and Isadora. The four of us will live together, four rough and tough, talented women surviving the concrete jungle as a team.
Katy: Oh, I don’t… I couldn’t --
Valerie: Katy, you belong here. In this city, with your daughter and your dreams. If I have proven anything in this endeavor, it’s that it’s never too late to change course and achieve something you never thought possible. [ a beat ] You belong in Manhattan, with Maya. Talent like yours shouldn’t be wasted in the farmland of Vermont.
Katy processes that, taking another sip of her champagne. If a Hollywood starlet is telling her she’s meant to be here, then who is she to refuse it?
Katy: Alright. Alright, then!
Valerie claps excitedly, already abuzz with so many new ideas.
Valerie: Oh, this is so exciting. This is amazing! Isadora and Maya are going to be over the moon. This is a bigger deal than when my good friend and mentee Lizzo basically single-handedly saved the R&B industry.
She raises her glass again for another toast. Katy grants it, their glasses clinking together.
INT. PROM VENUE - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Dance Again” as performed by Selena Gomez || Instrumental
The lighting is more aesthetic and dimmer as the prom goes on, the junior class out grooving on the dance floor. We get shots of different combinations of them dancing -- Charlie is with Haley and Clarissa, Jade and Nigel are giggly as they get comfortable with one another, Dylan and Asher are upholding their reigning title as cutest couple.
In the midst of the festivities, Eric grows concerned as he realizes he can’t find Isadora. Farkle is nowhere to be found either -- and that’s because they’re not there. They’re long gone, someone having disappeared right under his nose.
Eric grabs Riley from the edge of the dance floor, asking if she’s seen either of them. She claims not since they first got here… is everything okay? Eric doesn’t respond, pushing through the crowd to try and get a better look.
He’s surrounded by teenagers, and yet none are the two he’s specifically supposed to be keeping an eye on. Just as he’s on the verge of panic, Jack comes to his side and asks what’s going on. What’s with the look on his face?
Eric, breathless: Isadora -- and Farkle -- they’re not -- I can’t find --
Jack: Okay, relax, alright?
Eric: Relax? I lost two children!
Jack: Okay, we’ll find them. Alright?
Jack drags Eric out of the center of the room, passing by HARPER BURGESS as they go. He tells her she’s in charge, guiding Eric out of the venue.
INT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - LIVING AREA - NIGHT
Lucas emerges from his room with a box, sleeves rolled up to his elbows and clearly down to business. He and GRACE FRIAR are operating with relative ease, indicating that their third household member isn’t home at present.
He places the box on the table in front of her, claiming that he’s gone through it and he needs her to go through it too so they can decide whether or not to donate it. Grace seems intrigued, but not opposed to the idea.
Grace: Spring cleaning?
Lucas: Something in my life might as well be in order.
She chuckles a bit at that, although the joke is admittedly somewhat dark. She starts going through the contents, hesitating before telling Lucas she’s sorry that he didn’t get to go to prom. He shrugs it off, but his aloof facade has worn thin over the week.
Grace gives him a warm smile, stating that he’ll be able to go next year.
Lucas: Yeah, let’s see if I make it through this year first.
Valid point. Lucas leaves her to keep going through the stuff, agreeing they should get rid of it either way before Kenneth gets back.
INT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - LUCAS’S ROOM - NIGHT
Lucas steps back into his closet of a bedroom, sighing at all the junk there still is to go through. He frowns when his phone vibrates in his pocket, growing even more confused when he sees who is calling. He answers.
Lucas: Hello?
Jack is on the other end of the line, already on the road with Eric.
Jack: What are you doing right now?
Lucas, flatly: Crystal meth.
Jack: Okay, you jest, but you’re really not in the position to be making those kind of jokes right now.
Lucas asks what’s going on, and Jack explains the situation. He asks if Lucas has seen or heard from Isadora, and he says no. When Jack requests that he go search that side of town, just drive around and take a look, Lucas seems skeptical.
Lucas: Aren’t you forgetting? My license is suspended.
Jack, unimpressed: Am I really supposed to believe that makes a difference?
Lucas: … fair enough. I’ll do whatever.
Jack assures him if he gets into any trouble, he’ll help him out of it. They just need to get a trace on them so Eric can breathe again. Lucas grabs his denim jacket, heading out.
INT. DINER - NIGHT
Isadora and Farkle, thankfully, are not engaged in anything remotely nefarious. They’re just making an evening out of it all their own, having escaped prom to seek refuge at a non-descript diner across town.
Farkle is way more enthused by the prospect than Isadora. He’s practically jittery, tapping his fingers on the table and unable to stop grinning. He claims this is the most fun, the most freedom, he’s had in months.
Isadora: Okay, calm down, edgelord. It’s not that deep.
Oh, but perhaps it is, Isadora. Farkle leans further into the theatricality, dramatically stating that he doesn’t think there’s ever been a night quite like this. Full of this… energy, and mystery, and potential. Can’t she feel it? In homage to the number that’s just about to come into play, Farkle sits up so that he’s sitting on the booth seat, rather than in it.
Isadora: Okay, what are you doing? Sit down.
Farkle: Can’t you just feel it? And how… how we start thinking --
Isadora: Start thinking what?
Farkle: How wonderful it all is.
Isadora: How wonderful what all is?
Farkle: Everything.
Isadora: Now you’re just talking nonsense. Did you take too much medication this morning? What are you on?
He, Isadora, is on life. The freedom of tonight, how good it feels to just be out and adventuring and… alive. In fact, he thinks, it might need some expressing…
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “A Lovely Night” as performed by Cinderella Original Television Cast Recording || Performed by Farkle Minkus (feat. Isadora De La Cruz) [ starting at 4:20 ]
Farkle pushes his way out of the booth and starts sauntering through the diner, Isadora leaning out after him and whispering for him to come back. But he’s already on his way as the instrumental comes in, meaning there’s no hope. This singing train has left the station!
So he kicks off the first verse, singing the fantastical lyrics about how absolutely perfect the evening is. Somehow, it actually works, brightening up the drab, everyday diner and adding a splash of something special and unique.
It helps that Farkle is crazy and completely unapologetic as he takes over the space, the other patrons hesitant at first but then endeared by the performance. Farkle sings the first line about a “charming prince” to a gaggle of middle school girls, who all collectively lose their shit when he turns away from them. To them, for all intents and purposes, all suave in his prom suit and singing so elegantly, he is a prince charming.
Isadora might be starting to figure that out too, as she watches in disbelief while Farkle pulls other diners and workers into brief stints of choreography. By the time he makes it back over to her table in the second verse, he leans forward on the table and sings the lines “darling, I love you” while looking right into her eyes.
Part of the whole act? It’s impossible to tell.
Then he pulls her up from the booth, into dancing with him through the diner as the dance break commences. Although she’s hesitant at first, Isadora is more surprised by how not averse to the experience she is. Farkle is a good dancer, at least this kind of dancing, and it’s not long before she finds herself grinning and laughing along.
They spin their way towards the front, right out the doors…
EXT. DINER - NIGHT
And out into the city, the world aglow with nightlife and even more emphasized by the unreal quality of the dance. It feels very La La Land. They continue the pas de deux through to the end, Farkle picking up the lyrics again for the final rendition of the chorus.
They end it spinning in a circle in the parking lot, Isadora laughing and Farkle truly free as they round out the performance. If there’s going to be any true spectacle this prom season, then Icarus and the fallen Techie Queen dancing together in what may as well be a fantasy sure takes the cake.
INT. JACK’S CAR - MOVING - NIGHT
Eric is not feeling the fantasy, a nervous wreck as they drive through the streets looking for signs of Isadora and Farkle. He relays that she has not responded to any of his texts, and Jack states that’s it. He pulls over, allowing him to give his focus to Eric as he parks on the side of the road.
Jack takes Eric’s phone, out of his grasp.
Jack: Enough. You’re driving yourself crazy.
Eric: Yeah, you’re one to talk. [ trying to snatch it back ] Mister obsessive civil suit --
Jack: Oh, I’m not saying I’m innocent. But you have got to give yourself a break. It was their choice to sneak out and go wild, not yours. You can only do so much. If they choose to be idiotic, that’s on them. Regardless of how much we care.
Eric knows that Jack is speaking from experience. He sighs, slouching back in the passenger seat. Jack tries to comfort him, reminding him that Isadora and Farkle are two of the smartest students at AAA. They’re not going to get into trouble. Besides, if they are, then at least they have their best troublemaker on the case.
Jack: He’s like a heat-seeking missile. If there’s mischief afoot, trust me, I believe he’ll find it.
EXT. NEW YORK STREETS - NIGHT
Maybe so, Jack. Maybe so. Somehow, Lucas manages to catch up to Isadora and Farkle as they’re walking along the streets, slowing down in Grace’s car and coming up next to them. He honks, startling them both.
Lucas: Hey! Lunatics!
Isadora: Lucas? What the hell are you doing here?
Lucas: I could ask you the same question.
Farkle: Isn’t your license suspended?
Lucas holds up a finger to silence Farkle, not acknowledging his question. He keeps his focus on Isadora, who is similarly confused.
Isadora: Isn’t your license suspended?
Lucas: You tell me. You tell me what the hell you’re doing walking around like freaks and sending Eric so postal Jack had to send me out here risking future legal penalty to come find you.
Farkle: Hey, I mean, we snuck out of prom. [ holding his arms out ] Don’t I get a little credit for that, Lucas James Friar?
Lucas glares at him, unimpressed.
Lucas, sharply: Don’t talk to me like you know me.
Farkle raises his hands in surrender, turning away. Lucas turns his focus back to Isadora.
Lucas: Tell Eric where the hell you are and that you’re not dead. At least pay him that decency.
Isadora: Alright! Alright, I will. Sorry you got dragged into it.
Lucas: You’re so lucky I have no life.
Lucky, indeed… Lucas drives off, leaving the two of them alone again. Isadora shifts awkwardly, Farkle hesitating before giving her an unbothered smirk. Woo, reckless freedom!
INT. JACK’S CAR - NIGHT
Jack gets the text from Isadora on Eric’s phone. He smiles and then passes it back to him, telling him that now he can breathe again.
And so he can. Eric lets out a huge sigh of relief, falling back against the seat and rubbing his face. These kids, are they ever gonna let them live? Once he’s pulled himself off the ledge, Eric drops his hands and asks what they’re supposed to do now.
Now that they’re already out? Well… Jack shrugs.
Jack: You like bowling?
INT. PROM VENUE - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Magic” as performed by Gabrielle Aplin || Performed by Yindra Amino
Things slow down back at the prom, allowing the students to shift into a slow dance. Before Riley and Charlie can make any decisions, Zay swoops over to them to cut in. For a second it seems as though he might ask Charlie, in front of everyone… but he simply requests a dance with his favorite girl at AAA. Charlie relents without an argument, allowing him to steal Riley.
Riley: Sweet of you to say all that. And…
Zay: And I will give anything not to slow dance with Maya, yes.
Charlie shifts his sights to Haley, offering a hand to her. With their former conversation having cleared the air, the two of them are able to simply enjoy a dance together rather than twisting themselves up over what it might mean.
Yindra’s vocals truly help set the mood. The types of slow dancers are all across the spectrum. The soft familiarity of Dylan and Asher, whispering in each other’s ears and smiling and tilting their heads against one another; the timid beginnings of Nigel and Jade, more distance between them but equally as happy to be sharing the dance. Then there’s Maya, not bothering to slow dance at all and continuing her campaign amongst the other single prom-goers.
While Zay and Riley dance, they softly discuss how the evening is going. Riley subtly makes it clear that she is no way moving in on Charlie -- they should both be well aware how unlikely that would be. Zay holds no such suspicions. After all…
Zay: Think you and I are both here while our hearts are somewhere else.
Couldn’t have said it better, Isaiah. Tellingly, while Haley and Charlie are having a swell enough time dancing together, he cannot seem to keep his gaze from drifting towards Zay over her shoulder…
Yindra brings the number home, delivering yet another dazzling performance.
INT. BOWLING ALLEY - NIGHT
Pow! A bowling ball knocks over a volley of pins, shattering the dreamy melancholy of prom.
Jack and Eric have already played one game, crashed in one of the tables by the lanes and sharing some cheap bowling alley snacks. They’re also drinking and… okay, they might be a tad tipsy. They’re laughing as they chat about the evening, more relaxed than we’ve ever seen them. They could almost be teenagers themselves, just wasting away prom night at a bowling alley and blowing off expectations.
Eric complains about Isadora and Farkle’s actions, still not over the sleight. Like he gets it, they’re teenagers, but really? Jack chuckles, shrugging and claiming it’s just that kind of night. He can remember how he used to be -- Lucas really isn’t that far off from how he was at that age, although the kid is way more ballsy than he was.
Besides… there’s something about prom night, man. It makes people do crazy things.
Jack: I was never super into it, but… ha. I remember senior year, me and the guy I was going with --
Eric nearly chokes on his drink. Jack raises his eyebrows, handing him a napkin in concern.
Jack: You okay?
Eric: Yeah. Yeah, I just -- [ clearing his throat ] Guy? You went with a guy?
Jack: Oh, yeah. Administrators weren’t thrilled about it at the time though. [ off his stunned expression ] Oh, come on. You know I’m bisexual. We’ve totally discussed this.
Eric: Um. No. No we have not.
Jack: We definitely have.
Eric: Jack, I would not have forgotten that. Believe me.
Jack shrugs, smiling to himself and taking another drink. Eric just stares at him, trying to reconcile this new understanding he has of his friend and co-worker in his head. He starts to say something, then thinks better of it. Lost for words.
The music on the sound system of the bowling alley saves him from having to speak. As soon as the song starts playing, both of them react with joyful acknowledgement.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Bye Bye Bye” as performed by *NSYNC || Performed by Jack Hunter & Eric Matthews
At first the two of them just reminiscence, talking about how classic this song is. Speaking of hits of their youth, this was it in the college days. But as they casually start singing along in their seats, just like their students (and maybe thanks to the alcohol), the groove overtakes them.
Eric jumps to his feet first, crouching on his seat and launching into the second verse. Jack cracks up and claps, encouraging the dramatic performance. Eric manages to pull him into it as well, the two of them delivering the rendition with the same gusto as their overdramatic students.
INT. BYE BYE BYE DREAMSCAPE - NIGHT
In their folly, it would only be fair to give them the same imaginative scape as their students. Part of the performance is a fantasy tribute to the “Bye Bye Bye” music video, Jack and Eric dressed as if they’re back in the early 2000s and dancing around a tilting room.
INT. BOWLING ALLEY - NIGHT
We cut back and forth between that and them wreaking mild havoc in the bowling alley, and gosh dang is it a fun performance.
That’s one way to cut loose for a night. Let’s go principal and counselor!
EXT. HOTEL - NIGHT
Farkle walks Isadora to the front stoop of the fancy hotel Valerie is staying at, although she tells him that he didn’t have to. He claims as her date it was his duty -- even if their arrangement wasn’t exactly by choice.
Isadora: Well, impressively, I did actually have fun.
Farkle: Oh?
Isadora: Yes. I don’t expect the enchantment to last past midnight, but it was fun while it lasted. [ a beat ] I suppose I’m glad that I had to babysit tonight.
Farkle rolls his eyes. Isadora looks at him for a long moment, and then stands on her tip-toes to give him a quick kiss on the cheek.
He blinks, obviously not expecting it. After a moment he kind of smiles, caught between a confused frown and a pleasantly surprised smile. He looks at her, narrowing his eyes.
She gives him no explanation. She just tilts her head in a nod and marches through the revolving door, leaving him on the sidewalk. He glances up at the building, smile widening as he spins on his heel and saunters down the street.
INT. PROM VENUE - NIGHT
Clarissa and Haley are just wrapping up a performance, dismounting the stage as Harper heads up to the microphone. She warms up the crowd by asking how everyone is enjoying prom, which is met with resounding cheers. The time has come, she announces, for the crowning of their junior and senior prom court!
Amidst the cheers, Charlie shifts his focus to Riley next to him. She’s zoned out, glancing over her shoulder and not paying any attention. Looking for someone who isn’t going to be there, no matter how many times she looks.
After a moment, he elbows her lightly.
Charlie: You should go.
Riley: What? What do you mean?
Charlie: I appreciate what you did for me tonight. But we both know… you don’t want to be here. Not really. [ nodding towards the door ] So you should go. Don’t waste the rest of your night on me.
Riley examines him, thoughtful. Then she smiles, taking his arm and leaning forward to give him a kiss on the cheek. She squeezes his arm.
Riley: Never a waste.
Then she’s gone, weaving her way through the crowd and on a mission. Charlie watches her go, and when he turns back to the crowd and the excitement of the senior prom court being announced he suddenly feels very detached. Like he’s a fish out of water, as if he shouldn’t even be there at all.
It’s claustrophobic. Charlie starts to push his way through the crowd as well, searching for an exit. Needing to get out of there.
From where he’s waiting with Maya, Zay notices Charlie’s frantic escape. He frowns, hesitating for only a moment before darting out after him. Only Maya notices him go, looking after him in confusion.
Maya, in a whisper: Zay. Zay!
He’s already gone. And her attention is stolen anyway, as Harper gets a drum roll going for the announcement of junior prom queen and king. It goes, unsurprisingly… to Maya and Zay!
Only Zay is nowhere to be found. Lucky for him, Maya is an expert showman and covers as if it’s nothing. She hops up onto stage and happily accepts, claiming her king had to dip out for a moment and she’ll be accepting both on his behalf.
Once she’s found a way to balance both crowns on her little blonde head, she takes to the microphone and gives a small speech about what an honor it is to be selected. And in return, tonight, she’ll give them a prom slow dance really worth remembering. As the track cues up --
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “At Last” as performed by Beyoncé || Performed by Maya Hart
As obnoxious as she is, there is no doubt about the fact that Maya Hart can sing. Her vocals are damn good on the romantic classic, truly creating a perfect final slow dance for the evening. And she’s milking every second of it, glamorous as ever in her elegant gown and dual crown glory.
EXT. PARKING LOT - NIGHT
Charlie has made his way to a mostly vacant section of the parking lot, inhaling as much fresh air as he can. He holds his breath, then lets it out, fighting off whatever strange panic was prickling at him.
It doesn’t truly fade until Zay joins him, approaching casually and claiming that he’s missing Maya’s big performance. Isn’t that what he came all the way out to prom for anyway? Charlie can’t help but laugh, even though the vibe between them is still uncertain.
Charlie: Oh, naturally. Everything’s about Maya Hart, after all.
Zay: Absolutely everything, yeah.
Charlie: [ just looking at him ] … shouldn’t you be in there too, then? Far as I recall, you were her running mate.
Zay, with a shrug: I didn’t really care much about it.
Zay is stepping closer with every word that passes between them.
Charlie: … no?
Zay: Nah. I mean, can’t blame Maya though. She knows how to pick a winning candidate.
Charlie: Well, no arguments here. Sure you don’t want to get your crown, though? Think that would be a nice prize regardless.
They’re standing right in front of each other. Zay swallows, meeting his eyes.
Zay: I can think of something better.
Charlie lets that sink in, not sure how to respond. Knowing that they’re the way they are for a reason… but then there he is, right there in front of him…
Zay doesn’t ask for much. He gently takes Charlie’s hands, pulling him towards him and into a slow dance. There in the parking lot, alone, where nobody else is going to bother them.
Charlie is stiff at first, then slowly he relaxes into it. The familiarity, the ease, the way they seem to just naturally fit together... especially when it comes to dancing.
Still, something in his expression is conflicted. It’s obvious he loves it -- being so close to Zay, sharing anything with him regardless of what their status is -- but then that’s the problem, isn’t it? As long as Charlie is around him, he’s never going to be able to let it go. They’re going to keep drifting back to each other like this, and Zay is never going to be able to move forward.
Charlie realizes all of that… and yet.
For now, he chooses to live in the moment. He tilts his head against Zay’s shoulder and chooses to soak it up for all it’s worth, the dance and the closeness and the way he continues to choose him, even when he pushes him away.
Everything else, he can deal with another day.
INT. VALERIE’S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
Isadora has changed back into more comfortable clothes, Valerie hanging her dress up so that it stays nice and unruffled. After all the hard work Stella McCartney put into it, she would hate for it to only survive one use!
Then Valerie settles on the bed with Isadora, telling her the good news. The paperwork went through -- they’re on their way. She just has some things she needs to go wrap up last minute in Los Angeles, and then they’re going to do it. They’re going to be a proper mother and daughter, she’ll move to the city, and everything is going to change. For the better, she’s sure.
Isadora is stunned just to hear it said -- she can’t begin to wrap her head around it in reality. But she manages action, leaning forward to initiate a hug with Valerie.
She hugs her back, tight, so excited about the next steps they’ll be taking together.
INT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - LUCAS’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Well, for only a night’s work, Lucas has made substantial progress on organizing his hell bedroom. You can actually see the floor now in most places, which is a step up. Maybe one solution to not having horrible mental health is to not feel like you’re living in an abandoned storage closet. Music is playing from his phone, shuffling the playlist Riley made him last year.
He finishes clearing the floor by the actual closet door, finding Riley’s gala shawl. He holds it in his hands, delicately, trying to decide what to do with it. It’s survived this long, in spite of all the times he’s thought about destroying it -- to get rid of it now would almost be a disservice.
He’s distracted from the decision for now, his phone buzzing. He settles onto his bed, putting the shawl to the side towards his pillow and opening the message.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Ebony Eyes” as performed by Jamie Scott || Instrumental
It’s from Dylan, a group picture of the techie crew in the midst of the glitz of prom. The caption underneath it is simple and to the point -- “We miss you!!!!!!!”
Lucas can’t help but smile, but after a moment it shifts to something more muted. The disappointment is clear on his face now, fully realizing how much he might be missing out on. How much he’s missed out on for the entire year, while he was busy fighting to survive his own personal hurricane. And there’s no way to get that back -- there’s no way to know if it’ll ever stop hurricaning, given how up in the air everything feels.
He’s distracted once again from his own internal musing, this time by creaking from outside his window. At first he glances towards his door, worried it might be someone coming home, but an additional creaking confirms it’s coming from outside. It’s coming from the fire escape.
Cautiously, Lucas gets to his feet, edging towards his window. He nearly jumps out of his skin when Riley appears from the ladder below, scrappily climbing her way up to his level.
EXT. LUCAS’S APARTMENT - LUCAS’S FIRE ESCAPE - NIGHT
Lucas scrambles out the window to meet her, eyes wide in disbelief. She smiles at him as he emerges and she manages to pull herself fully onto the fire escape. There’s barely room for them both to stand, Lucas taking her arm and pulling her as far from the window -- and his apartment -- as possible.
Lucas: What the hell are you doing here?
Riley blinks at him, trying to catch up with her own choice of actions. She’s changed out of her fancy gown, hair and makeup still done up but having opted for a pair of high-waisted jeans and a thrifted tee. Better attire for building scaling, at least.
She explains that she couldn’t stop thinking about him and how he was missing out, so she decided to bring some of the fun to him. She shrugs off her backpack, unzipping it and showing off some of the snacks and movies and junk she threw in there along with her laptop. She didn’t have a lot of specific ideas, or anything, she just thought… who knows. She just knew she wanted to be here.
Lucas is in shock. He can’t believe any person would ditch prom without some other grand plan, and definitely not for him.
Lucas: That’s… that’s nice, but you shouldn’t have to do this. You should be at prom, having fun. Least of all worrying about me.
Riley, shaking her head: Wasn’t the same without you.
Oh. Well then. Riley glances towards his room, recognizing the music playing and smiling to herself. She comments that at least he has good tunes to get him through the night, and the slower, rustic song playing now is better than about half of the songs they played at the dance.
In fact… she did say she was going to bring the evening to him…
Dropping her backpack by the window, Riley cautiously takes Lucas’s hands. When he doesn’t complain, she gently guides him into a dance of their own -- a promenade on six square feet of metal with a shitty outdated iPhone speaker acting as the DJ.
Even still, it might be the most authentically romantic duet of the night. The music quality shifts and improves to be more encompassing as they settle into the dance, once again supplemented by that fantastical quality of the evening. Secluded enough for Lucas to ease into it, more intimate than a room full of their peers would allow.
After a minute or so, Riley adjusts their posture and presses their foreheads together. For how soft the moment is, the energy between them may as well be electric. They’re inches apart, one or two breaths and a bold choice away from another kiss. And maybe they could…
But not tonight. Not yet.
Riley shifts and rests her head against his shoulder, Lucas closing his eyes and tilting his head against hers.
For now, what they have in this moment together is enough.
INT. AAA - ATRIUM - DAY
Crazy how in the aftermath of such a whimsical weekend, life is expected to proceed as normal. Jack is in good spirits as he jogs his way into the school building later than usual, pushing through the doors at the same time as Lucas. Lucas comments on his late showing.
Jack: You know, for all the times you’ve shown up to class tardy with no good excuse, I think you can zip it on this one.
Touché. Jack does remember to thank Lucas for his help with Farkle and Isadora though, expressing that it was a big help. He asks how he spent the rest of his evening -- aside from the crystal meth.
Lucas, nonchalantly: Nothing much. And you?
Jack: Got kicked out of a bowling alley.
Lucas: … fun. Respect.
Jack grins, nodding him on his way. He makes his way back into the office…
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Where the real world is waiting for him. Jack is surprised by the gift-wrapped item on his desk -- until reality slams into him like a freight train. He drops his briefcase and jogs towards it, lifting the ribbon-bound local newspaper into his hands.
There it is. The Bradford case, front page Monday morning news. Likely paid a fortune to make it front page news, if he knows his adversaries.
It’s officially gone public. The fantasy is over. Another day has arrived, and now it’s time to deal with all of the challenges ahead.
Now, it’s time to take action. For better or for worse.
END OF EPISODE.
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Why I Hate Tim Burton’s Sweeney Todd
Hate is a strong word but, yes, I really don’t like the 2007 Sweeney Todd. I didn’t like it when it came out (and I was already a big Burton fan girl AND my family is made up of theater people. Don’t you dare try to Burton-splain or Theater-splain me). The musical fan in me dislikes it for overshadowing the story which I think is much better on stage, while the Burton fan in me hates it for being the “best thing Burton’s made since the 90s” according to some. More on that later.
Let me dissect the two things that irk me most about this adaptation:
1) Johnny Depp’s Sweeney Todd
Let’s get something straight about stage shows: every actor is gonna play a role a little differently. Every (good) actor brings a new dimension to a character or portrays them in a way that brings something new to the audience, be it people who’ve seen the show hundreds of times or those watching the musical for the first time. This is even more complicated when you have a movie adaptation of the play. The movie is likely gonna be seen more than the stage musical, so you have to get used to that version being the only one people know and thus being an interpretation of character people will like the best. You CAN’T expect Johnny Depp to play Sweeney like Len Cariou or George Hearn. Johnny is not only NOT those actors, his portrayal of the character follows a very different characterization and mannerisms than them.
Personally - I like my Sweeney being this angry person ready to burst with rage at the drop of the hat, someone who seethes hate everywhere he goes but doesn’t seem to turn heads, yet he still has a sense of humor about a situation, possibly as a way to adjust to his new philosophy. That doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be sad or solemn though. He’s clearly in pain on the inside, and like a real psychopath is trying his best to feel something again while trying not to return to the pain of loosing his wife and child. I also like Sweeney trying - possibly failing - to put on this air or everything being okay like he’s still just a humble barber and not a nihilistic serial killer. Basically, I like my Sweeney being highly emotional. I like my baritone-bass, Cariou/Hearn type Sweeneys.
Depp and/or Burton is going for a “lost all emotion and joy, never smiles, empty shell, cold and clearly brooding”-type Sweeney. Whatevs. The problem isn’t that you CAN’T play Sweeney that way. Sweeney’s only requirement as a character is that he be a psychotic, revenge-driven, deeply heartbroken man that’s so bent on revenge he ends up destroying the very thing he set out to avenge. You can play up his emotions or lack there of as much as you want.
My problem is that I don’t think Depp plays that well.
I don’t know whether it was his choice, Burton’s choice, or both to have Sweeney sneer more than a 1st grader at a teacher who told him he has to spend recess doing homework- but seriously THAT’S ALL I SEE. Depp looks like he’s trying too hard to look angry and super serious. He’s so edgy looking and his dryness doesn’t come off as engaging to me. His emotionless performance feels lazy. It doesn’t help that he can’t sing either. Like, seriously, Johnny Depp can’t sing. Helena Bonham Carter can sing better than him. I suppose Sweeney Todd isn’t the kind of musical where characters are supposed to sound ‘pretty’, but they could at least sound like they’re hitting a note.
Speaking of Helena-Bonham-Lovett, while I don’t like her performance, I think it’s way more solid than Depp’s. That’s because - again - while this Lovett is very different from the much preferred Landsbury-type, it’s still a version of Mrs. Lovett and gets the most of what her character should be down: desperate, sick and twisted, in-Love with Sweeney and dubious in nature, leaving your to wonder how much worse she is compared to him. Landsbury Lovett is a nasty hag pretending to be a warm grandma; Carter’s Lovett is a worn-out prostitute; whichever way you go you have a desperate, delusional monster cook. It’s not my Mrs. Lovett, but it is a Mrs. Lovett.
Depp’s Todd is sooooooooooo broody you guyz that he doesn’t even feel like Sweeney anymore. He just feels like a generic heartless killer DONUT STEELE GUYS! The character is lost beneath the over-under-acted performance and star power.
2) Tim Burton’s super emo-phase directing
Prepare for the Burton-hipster in me to come out.
I hated Tim Burton’s visual storytelling and mood as a director in the 2000s. For starters, everything has a super dark, shadowy (ugly) filter. It ruined Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, it ruined Alice and Wonderland and it ruined this to some extant. IT’S A TIM BURTON FILM. We don’t need a grey, hazy, deluded color scheme to show that it’s gothic. Actually I think Burton benefited a lot in his earlier movies by having lots of scenes shot in sunny environments with good color schemes to better compliment when things got melancholic, gross, weird, or messed up. Beetlejuice and Edward Scissorhands are the shining examples of this trope. Not every scene looks super deep or grim, so they stand out from the rest of the scenes in the film and establish tone.
Of course, if there’s one story that could benefit from a washed out, dry color scheme I think it IS this film, and I do like the contrast for how bright the blood is. I just wish the lighting wasn’t so overbearing in EVERY scene, no matter what the intended mood. Also it looks kinda bluish. Like it’s an Evanescence music video, probably not helped by the overabundance of CGi. Also, Victorian London is muggy and gross. Burton’s film makes even London at it’s dirtiest feel kinda polished through his lighting and set design. Les Mis did a better job at showing you the grungy side of it’s environment.
More important than visuals is the way in which Burton directed his actors and wrote characters at this time. No matter what the film he was making at the time, every character and every actor looks like they just got punched in the gut and act super dry. The only film that benefited from this ‘charisma’ was Corpse Bride: the story is bleak, melancholic, and at times cynical, it’s characters should emanate that for the sake of the story.
Much like Depp’s Sweeney, everyone whose not Helena Bonham Carter looks emo, angry, emotionless or sad, which by the way doesn’t help Sweeney stand out. Everyone looks like or feels like they’re serial killers. This is a cast of mostly deplorable characters but very few true-blue killers like Sweeney and Lovett. And if they’re supposed to be characters pushed to becoming Sweeney 2.0, like Joanna or Toby, the movie doesn’t do a good job at portraying that. Anthony gets it the worst since he’s the starry-eyed idealist who is too good for this or any world, but instead comes off as a creepo with weird hair. His plans for Joanna are supposed to be alarming, but you’re never supposed to feel like he’d do something bad to her. Movie!Anthony is so much of a crazed stalker that you really don’t want to spend ANYTIME with him or Joanna.
--
I find this adaptation overrated.
In the world of theater, you have to put up with the fact that not everyone can afford to see Broadway shows or take leap of faith and jump at a college or community theater production hoping it’s somewhat decent. Some people are gonna stick to the movie versions and that’s fine (Grease and Chicago are way better movies than they are stage-shows, in my opinion). So if someone prefers the Depp film to the show there’s not much you can do. That’s their opinion and that’s what they were introduced to first.
But then you get these movie critics and film buffs who say things like “this is the best Tim Burton film since (insert pre-1995 Burton film here)” and “it’s so well written, why doesn’t he make stuff like this anymore?”...I kinda wanna scream.
TIM BURTON DIDN’T WRITE SWEENEY TODD. The story is good cause he’s adapting an already existing story to the screen. Frankly, I think his flavor of gothic hinders the story. And the whole “this is the only good new Burton movie”-thing is also really annoying. Big Eyes is great. Heck, if you’re big on Tim Burton’s tropes being used to better affect, Frankenweenie is a better example than this film.
The thing about Tim Burton is, I think he’s better at working with small-scale stories, conflicts and themes than he is at tackling “deep” stuff, which Sweeney Todd is. Burton’s movies are simple in their complexity. That’s why when he tries to write war-based movies or “chosen one” stories like Alice in Wonderland or Planet of the Apes, it falls on it’s face. A Burton movie is more entertaining when he’s obviously just having fun with the stuff he likes and isn’t trying to present himself or his film as some auteur-masterpiece. In fact, if there’s any gothic musical more fit in Tim Burton’s hands than Sweeney Todd, I would say it’s Phantom of the Opera. That musical is ALL melodrama. It feels more at home with Burton than the moral- character driven bloodbath horror of Sweeney Todd. But hey, I guess that’s indicative of people thinking ‘well it’s goffik, so it’s perfect for so-and-so regardless of what their style is and what story we’re trying to tell’.
-
Rant done. Been waiting to get that off my chest since forever.
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Doctor Blake Mysteries - S2E3. Otherwise known as Kylie’s inane and rather insane review... part seven...
My apologies to anyone who is reading this. Busy week. Here’s more rambling drivel of 2x3...
*Doctor Blake Mysteries 2x3*
Yep, as predicted, Mr Benetti sure does have some ‘splain to do, in an interview room at the Ballarat Police Station. Lucien is (not for the first time in the series), permitted to be one of the people who conduct the interview. It’s always struck me as a trifle odd that he is allowed to do this, I would have thought this was the job of the actual police officers, and not part of the police surgeon’s role… except for perhaps in exceptional circumstances – yet here he is, seemingly a good 75% of the time, (or more), in the interview room…
Anyhoo, our Doctor Yummy is looking rather puzzled and deep in thought here as Matthew questions him, and in typical no-holds barred kinda way, “What the bloody hell do you think you were doing?”
Mr Benetti may not have completely understood what he was saying, but the tone was unmistakeable. It was MAD. How dare he throw poison laced with cyanide on one of his officers?
After suspect numero uno has apologised for this mighty faux pas, Lawson then asks him if he is staying at the Porter’s Rooming House, to which the response is affirmative “si.”
The superintendent then shows Benetti a photo of John Doe… Smith… err, whoever the hell he is. “Do you know this man?”
“Si.”
“You know his name?”
“Arsehole!” Hmm… it’s always the curse/bad/naughty words that are picked up first…
Quite like Lucien’s reaction here… like he’s trying not to laugh. He lifts his head up and a cheeky little smile escapes. It kinda reminds me of his alter ego… just a tad…
Matthew almost tops it though with a rather polite, “Thank you Mr Benetti.”
The conversation then turns to the alleged fight two nights earlier, which our suspect confirms indeed happened. Apparently, the victim was very strong and very rude. Lucien finally speaks… it has to be one of the longest amounts of time he’s been in a scene before he actually gets to open his mouth. He asks Mr Benetti, “Why fight?”
“Libro.”
They fought over a book. Well, goodness me.
According to Mr Benetti, he’s trying to teach himself English and he picked up the dead man’s book, and John Doe/Smith got very angry and they argue and fight.
Lawson then enquires as to his whereabouts on Sunday afternoon.
It doesn’t look good for Mr Benetti…
“Giardini…”
Lucien translates this as the Botanic Gardens.
Uh oh…
So it is the Botanic Gardens. I did think this initially as I’ve actually been fortunate enough to visit the gardens a few years ago… but I thought given the geographical location of the gardens it may have just been some park closer to the CBD of Ballarat…
Matthew then lets the questions rip to try and ascertain whether or not he killed this man, and of course he is going to deny it.
I don’t think they believe you though.
Nope, they don’t. Didn’t think so.
Lucien and Matthew are walking back into the bullpen and are discussing what they’ve learned.
“He kills the man over a book of poetry.”
Seems a little extreme, but if the shoe fits…
Matthew then does the checklist as to whether or not he has the means, motive and opportunity…
• prior confrontation – tick • access to cyanide – tick • was in the gardens on Sunday – tick
The conversation then swings back to poetry. Lucien informs Matthew about the torn page of poetry in our mystery man’s suitcase, proceeds to find it from said suitcase and starts to read it…
The Return of Persephone. “Gliding through the still air He made no sound Wing-shod and deft, Dropped almost at her feet…”
Matthew clears his throat in a *very* subtle hint… he’s probably thinking something along the lines of “bloody poetry. It’s a load of codswallop and why the f*** would someone poison someone over it??? You can stop now Blake, we have more important things to do than read bloody poetry.”
Think you were lucky to get four lines read Lucien… and it did not escape my notice that he read it rather fast, almost like he knew his friend did not have a particular liking for poetry, or guessed this.
Suitably chastised, Lucien then goes back to the matter at hand. “Benetti must have force-fed him the damned pesticide.” And wants to know how on earth that was possible. So do I Lucien.
Matthew gets a thoughtful look on his face, sighs, and suggests that, “Well, he is an aggressive bugger.”
Lucien: “Lawson imagine…”
Here we go folks, we’re going to be indulged with one of the many, and infamous Lucien going into “setting up the scene and playing it out in his head while discussing it with someone” moments. Oh, Kylie, couldn’t you have come up with a better term for it than that??? Ugh…
“Imagine if I tried to force this poison down your throat…”
Lawson: “I wouldn’t.” Bahaha, love it Superintendent!
Lucien: “Well you would…” And he goes to grab Matthew by the neck and shove the piece of paper down his throat. As you would to the Chief Superintendent! Of course. Good one Lucien…
Naturally, Lawson immediately puts a stop to him, which brings Lucien to his point about how this could happen in broad daylight in such a public place without anyone seeing Benetti do it. Hmm… excellent point Lucien. It is odd that no one would see anything untoward in the middle of the day in a public place.
He then goes to grab Matthew again…
Oh my god Lucien, do you want to be thrown in the cells???
Charlie has walked into the bullpen, with a woman tagging along behind him. He apologies for interrupting and introduces the woman as a Mrs Lundqvist. Thank goodness for subtitles there! I’m a good speller, (spelling and grammar are two of my faves… I’m sad I know), but I would have been unsure about that one!
She shows them the paper she has in her hands with the photo of our mystery man. And the man is in fact her husband. Hallelujah, we have a name at long last!
TBC..
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SPN 10x11: “There’s No Place Like Home”
Oh goodness. A rather violent attack is happening.
“I know. I'm gonna torture you anyway. 'Cause who doesn't love a little torture?” Hoo boy.
Don’t just dump the plate, Dean.
“You made egg-white omelettes?”
“Yeah. Breakfast of Champions -- you know, if you're a dork like you.”
Dean living like Sam.
Sam likes it...Dean does not.
“Soon as we get rid of this demonic tramp stamp, I am back on the booze, burgers, and . . . more booze.” Please don’t. At least chill on the booze.
“What the hell?”
“Cain or Crowley?”
“Charlie.”
“Is she back from Oz? She didn't call?”
Aww.
“Our Charlie? Yea high, wouldn't hurt a Hobbit, practically sparkles?” Good, cute description.
“Well, you know, Charlie wouldn't go off on someone without a reason.”
“Yeah, I wouldn't think so either, but look at the video.”
“Oh, I'm looking at it. But you know what we do, taken out of context, it doesn't look that much different. She could be hunting.”
Dean immediately on Charlie’s side.
He can’t even hold a regular blade without trembling.
“Now, did you notice anything odd before the attack -- any, uh, strange smells, weird noises?”
“No, no, nothing. I was just at home here, getting ready for bed, and that crazy bitch jumped me.”
Watch your words.
That’s a great picture of Charlie.
“Here's the thing. We talked to the other victim on the way here -- the stenographer. Now, she said the attacker didn't let her go until she gave up a name -- your name.”
“Okay. But w-what does that have to do with m-me being attacked in my own home, here?”
You gave up a name, genius.
Sam is on edge watching Dean.
Barbara Cordry.
Celeste Middleton. Charlie’s real name.
Same house from “Freaks and Geeks”.
“We have some questions about a drunk-driving case from a while back involving the Middleton family.”
“I have no idea what you're talking about.”
You’re gonna start off with a lie?
“Guilty much?” I know, right?
“What the hell is kale?” lmao
“There's got to be an explanation for this, man. There's just got to be.” There is.
“Let her go.”
“Who?”
The only person you’re holding hostage, dummy.
Let me just say it now: I don’t like Dark!Charile. She tests my patience.
They’re gonna have to teach me how to do that thigh maneuver tho, ‘cause it’s awesome as hell.
Damn it, she punctured Baby’s tires.
Hello, sunshine.
“What's up, bitches? Right. Um we should probably catch up.”
You got some ‘splaining to do.
“There are two of you -- one good, one . . . bad?”
“Yeah, what, dick you is some sort of a ninja?”
“She is a badass, yeah.”
Also a jerkface.
“The war for Emerald City. It was awesome. Until not so much. We were gonna lose, so I made a deal with the wizard . . . of Oz. Wears a hood and a creepy mask, kind of a jerk -- good times. He said for us to win, I had to unleash my true darkness, which he meant literally. He used the inner key of Oz. It opens a door to your soul and lets the darkness out.”
I wonder what Dark!Me would be like.
“Normally in a place like this, I'd be pounding Harvey Wallbangers and checking out the bartender's ass. Now all I want to do is sip club soda and send her to college.” Aww.
“Dark Charlie won the war single-handedly.” Holy hot damn.
Good!Charlie is so good, she can’t even be mean towards the person who killed her parents.
Dark!Charlie allows Charlie to hack computers.
Russell Wellington. The man who killed Charlie’s parents. He went to quite the lengths to protect himself.
“I just can't believe I have to . . . protect this piece of crap.”
“No, you got to protect them both. I mean, if dark Charlie gets hurt, then...”
“So do I, so . . . be careful.”
There’s the explicit warning about hurting Dark!Charlie.
“’The key to quieting your mind, is minding your quiet’.” Pfft.
Clive Dillon. “He is the Man of Letters that first discovered the key to Oz. So, according to this incident report, Clive went to Oz, but he left the key on earth, and then L. Frank Baum found the key and went to rescue Clive in Oz.”
“Mr. Presley? Mr. Presley?” All the “Twist and Shout” feels.
“Let me describe my dream home.” Aww no, I wanted to hear that.
Sam and Good!Charlie found Clive.
“Judging from your cheap shoes and your faded jeans, I'm guessing the only house you're in the market for comes with wheels. Now, look, I'm a busy man. My time is extremely valuable. I prefer not to have it wasted by some hayseed.“ Fuck you, too.
She’s here.
Cool ass blade maneuver.
“Blah, blah, blah, repressed feelings. Blah, blah, blah, passive aggression.”
“I don't want to hurt him. I just want to talk.” Highly doubt that.
Russell knew who she was right away.
Damn it.
RIP Russell Wellington. Killed by Dark!Charlie.
“She got to Russell. She killed him.”
“Oh my god.”
“Charlie, if you can hear me, I'm so sorry.”
“It's not your fault. It's mine.”
“No, no, no. don't -- don't say that. This is not on you.”
No, I think she holds some responsibility over this.
Ov vey, here she comes.
Hello, Clive.
“Enjoy.”
“Delicious.”
Alright, calm yourself.
“If you're not gonna ask her to dance, then I will.” Okay, b y e.
Dark!Charlie took Baby, hell she even rev’ed the engine just to taunt Dean.
“It's in my report.”
“Your report just said you were kidnapped. By whom?”
“Bad people.”
“I know that look. You're lying. And lying is --”
“--bad. Yes, I know. What happened to you, my dear, happened to me.”
They’ve been talking to the Good!Clive Dillon.
Evil!Clive is the Wizard of Oz!
“What he has done is my fault. After all, he is me, and I am him, so . . . Maybe it's time that both of us answered for our sins. It's the good thing to do, right? Right?” What a sweetheart.
“What the hell do you want?”
“I just want to talk to her.”
Could a fight been avoided if Dean had let her go in?
The Wizard of Oz!
The Wizard’s already being a jackass.
“That's it, big boy. Let it all out.” You know, for wanting to be back in Good!Charlie’s graces, she had no problem getting into a physical fight, where she KNEW she’d be hurting Good!Charlie.
STOP JUST STOP.
“I’m sorry.”
“I forgive you. We both do*.”
:( *Clive’s last words.
RIP Clive Dillon/Wizard of Oz. Killed by Good!Charlie.
That’s enough, Dean.
“You did it, didn't you? You killed the wizard. I knew it. The magic was in you all the time.” Reminds me of what Ruby said to Sam after he opened Lucifer’s cage.
This just breaks my heart.
Sam checking in with Cas.
“So...are you...”
“Good? Bad? I think I'll just settle for balanced.”
Good answer.
“I found this book. It's a lore book -- ‘The Book of the Damned.’" It has been introduced.
“Look, there's no going back to Oz. And with the wizard gone, Dorothy will be fine.” :( Goodbye forever, Dorothy.
“You're a Winchester.” Don’t roll your eyes, Dean.
“I forgive you, Dean.”
“Yeah, well, I don't.”
“I know. Kind of your move. How's that working out for you, huh?”
She’s right, you gotta forgive yourself, Dean.
“Arrivederci, bitches.” Bye, hon.
“She's right, Dean. You can do this. We can do this.” I believe in y’all.
“Then let’s get to work.” That’s the spirit.
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SLOANE SQUARED - My Review of MOLLY’S GAME (3 Stars)
Have you ever had that experience of seeing a film you really enjoyed, but had a nagging feeling about nonetheless? Where you wondered why it was made in the first place? How its central premise ultimately made no sense? Such is my ultimate summation of Aaron Sorkin’s directorial debut with MOLLY’S GAME, based on the autobiography by his title character, Molly Bloom.
Jessica Chastain plays Molly, an Olympic skiing hopeful whose accident during the qualifying rounds would send her life in a completely different direction. Moving from Colorado to Los Angeles, she slept on couches and worked as a server until happenstance would being her together with Dean Keith (Jeremy Strong, who REALLY knows how to play the hell out of your garden variety Hollywood douchebag). Hired as his assistant, she made $450 week fetching him bagels and performing any menial tasks required. Soon, he roped her into acting as the hostess for his underground, high stakes, celebrity-filled poker games. In real life, Molly collected $10,000 buy-ins from the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio and Ben Affleck, here personified by Michael Cera and known in the film as Player X. When Molly and Dean reach an impasse, she poaches his contacts to migrate to her own poker events. All of this, as the movie takes great pains to clarify, is legal, since Molly’s payments are in the form of tips and she reports her income to the IRS. So far, so good. There would be no movie, however, unless she crossed a line, scraping money from the earnings and acting as a lending bank for the gamblers in hoc. Now we’re off to the races!
Sorkin tells the story well, with a mixup of timelines which take us from Molly’s youth, her rise, and her struggles throughout her battle in court. He employs a ceaseless voiceover throughout, but the writing of it is so good and so compellingly performed by Chastain, that I didn’t mind. Besides, this movie has some ‘splaining to do.
Raised by a strict father (Costner, who brings shines as her tough love but caring parent), Molly appears hardened at a young age. She’s self-possessed, direct, and fraught with a nihilistic streak. Her introduction on the ski slope in the opening scene as her voiceover explains in exhaustive detail how things went so wrong on her fateful slalom, sticks the landing with her perfectly placed “Fuck you” even when her body literally doesn’t. It’s a great introduction to her character, but she’s not presented as the most layered person on the planet. If anything, she seems to be a icier, chillier V 2.0 of Chastain’s performance in last year’s MISS SLOANE. While Chastain captures the real Molly’s precise intelligence well, her sexuality goes missing. Molly Bloom made herself over to appeal to the rich poker players, who clearly prefer women in breast enhancing sausage skirts and Louboutins. She has a funny, flirty side that Chastain and the script seem to ignore. Chastain’s Molly is all business all the time.
Once Molly starts committing crimes, she seeks the help of an Attorney, Charlie Jaffey (Idris Elba), who’s reluctant to take her case since she was busted by the Feds, stripped of her money, and, oh yeah, broke the law. Nevertheless, Jaffey takes the case because…well, I’m not really sure. Because it’s high profile? Because Molly has integrity because she refuses to name names? God, I wish I knew, because it’s a huge stumbling block that the movie, for me, never really addresses properly. My guess is that Sorkin, working with a female protagonist for the first time, saw his story as a treatise on how tough it is for single women to survive in this world. Molly played the game, dressed the part, and appealed to men in order to keep a roof over her head. When she started feeling comfortable, she lowered her standards and made the choice to break the law…and now we’re celebrating her as some sort of working class heroine in a major motion picture? Can’t we just stick with Norma Rae? She had fun spunk. Molly has spunk too, but it’s pretty humorless.
Now don’t get me wrong. There’s a lot of greatness in this film. Idris Elba, compelling and winning as always, has a standout scene in which he keeps switching seats back and forth with a spectator in a courtroom so that he can keep talking to Molly. Chastain knows how to keep you watching her, even when the script doesn’t allow her as many levels as we would hope to see. It’s still a magnetic, memorable performance. Michael Cera, who really knew how to play the monster version of himself in THIS IS THE END, excels as a celebrity sociopath who loves to watch others lose. I was shocked to discover that Bloom based him on Tobey Maguire, who she claimed bullied her. I guess you can’t be Spider-Man 24/7. Chris O’Dowd, Brian d’Arcy James and Bill Camp offer up terrific supporting turns as some of Molly’s poker players. The script has Sorkin’s patented onslaught of sharp dialogue, forcing the viewer to sit up and take notice for its entire running time. As a director, he has clearly learned a lot from the David Finchers and Danny Boyles of the world by keeping things moving along crisply, despite a lack of his well-known walk and talks and a running time of 2 hours and 20 minutes. He still has a ways to go as a visual stylist, but it’s impressive work nonetheless.
Evidently, Sorkin was reluctant to take on this project. I’m guessing he was troubled by the same things I’ve mentioned, but somewhere along the way, he found his way in to his character. His attempt is on the screen, finding a key moment in her life where she found inner strength and persisted, but I don’t think he’s completely succeeded.
There have been many films about innocent people drawn into a life of crime, THE GODFATHER, GOODFELLAS, and THE DEPARTED among them. MOLLY’S GAME can fairly be named the distaff version of these works, complete with a heroine who steadfastly refuses to curry favor from the audience. She made her choices, however, and those involved going too far. Should that be celebrated? I really don’t know.
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