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z0mbicide · 2 months ago

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assigning the menaces texts from last night bc i love that site so goddamn much

under the cut; cw for nsft subject matter

asterion: (218): Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?

atlas: (309): If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.

agri: (236): I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.

arven: (719): Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?

aeon: (870): God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.

andrew: (607): I pointed at him and said "there goes mr fuckwad"

ambrose: (325): He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.

xander: (612): At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.

azur: (612): The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.

alcor: (870): Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.

arsène: (563): You know we wouldn't even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.

rian: (303): please don't ironically join a cult

artemis: (801): I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.

attis: (715) I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.

alata: (519): I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDN'T DO ALL AT ONCE

avan: (617): There's no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.

gaius: (519): hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?

ardalion: (709): Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day.

adam: (870): Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch

sunny: (262): At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in?" just go with it.

aegnis: (530): can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe

axel: (239): He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I'd say that's a fair trade.

adrian: (727): You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???

amelio: (920): I need advice on how to politely say "fuck you on your way to hell".

austin: (620): I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.

owain: (785): She's the kind of asshole whose face I want put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.

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z0mbicide · 2 months ago

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guess who has an ✨️ear infection✨️. anyways here's some more menaces stuff. these are their official heights, since i realized i've never shared them

under the cut

5'3.5:

andrew

gaius

sunny

5'4:

atlas

aegnis

5'5:

azur

austin

5'5.5:

asterion

5'6:

aeon

attis

5'6.5:

amelio

5'7:

arsène

alata

avan

ardalion

axel

adrian

5'7.5:

xander

5'8:

arven

ambrose

artemis

adam

owain

5'9:

agri

rian

5'10:

alcor

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z0mbicide · 2 months ago

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so a bitch is sick (hopefully just allergies), but i still wanna share the official fe 13/14 s-support options of the menaces bc i'm never not thinking abt this game (aka i've been alternating which of them i'm playing when i'm not sleeping)

(for reference: this is with the game modded, does not include gen1/gen2 s-supports (but does include 14's mu/royals pairs), and only agri, arven, ambrose, xander, azur, rian, attis, and austin actually play the games)

under the cut, as always

asterion: gaius & cherche, laslow & orochi

atlas: frederick & say'ri, niles & selena

agri: lon'qu & tharja, niles & kagero

arven: libra & emmeryn, laslow & oboro

andrew: frederick & flavia, azama & camilla

aeon: kellam & cordelia, odin & reina

ambrose: priam & sumia, kaze & flora

xander: chrom & olivia, jakob & scarlet

azur: chrom & panne, shura & mozu

alcor: yen'fey & tharja, saizo & rinkah

arsène: stahl & sully, silas & sakura

rian: henry & tiki, jakob & peri

artemis: yen'fey & aversa, subaki & setsuna

attis: vaike & miriel, kaden & charlotte

alata: gregor & panne, izana & felicia

avan: virion & lissa, leo & hana

gaius: kellam & maribelle, benny & peri

ardalion: kellam & sumia, yukimura & azura

adam: libra & maribelle, niles & felicia

sunny: gregor & lissa, keaton & effie

aegnis: libra & olivia, arthur & anna

axel: stahl & lissa, azama & kagero

adrian: frederick & cordelia, saizo & charlotte

amelio: lon'qu & olivia, odin & felicia

austin: frederick & anna, kaze & selena

owain: henry & sully, laslow & peri

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z0mbicide · 2 months ago

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i've decided on buddy pokémon for the menaces for funsies (did y'all hear abt the pkmn leaks?)

under the cut, as usual

asterion: yamper

atlas: sylveon

agri: eevee

arven: ceruledge

aeon: rowlet

andrew: shedinja

ambrose: zoroark

xander: salamence

azur: togepi

alcor: dragonite

arsène: sandshrew

rian: swampert

artemis: alolan raichu

attis: wooloo

alata: sprigatito

avan: delibird (shiny)

gaius: deoxys

ardalion: primarina

adam: mimikyu

sunny: golisopod

aegnis: metagross

axel: toxtricity

adrian: gallade

amelio: galarian zigzagoon

austin: slakoth

owain: garchomp (shiny)

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z0mbicide · 3 months ago

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family stuff for the menaces: siblings edition (bc i'm doing character building stuff)

under the cut, per usual; tws for death, transphobia, grooming, and family issues

asterion has an older sister named hera who is 3 years older than him. before turning, he was close with her, as she gave him the space to still enjoy feminine things after he came out, and she never belittled him for it. she's under the impression he died in an accident

atlas has older twin siblings, a brother named preston and a sister named emily who are 4½ years older than him. he doesn't speak to preston bc he's transphobic, but he's very close with emily, who accepted him from the get-go

agri has 4 older siblings, two brothers named zephyr and cosmo and two sisters named nevaeh and fortuna. zephyr is 7 years older than him, nevaeh is 5 years older than him, fortuna is 3 years older than him, and cosmo is 2 years older than him. he isn't on speaking terms with any of them. they're generally very unpleasant to speak with/be around, especially after his powers kicked in during puberty. before that, he was close with fortuna and cosmo, and they both called him grigri (which was retired when they started being. unpleasant.)

arven has an older sister named christi who is 6 years older than him. they get along well, but have their fair share of spats (mostly about shit that really doesn't matter in hindsight). she's the only person allowed to call him arvie, but he pretends he hates it

aeon has an older sister named amber who is 5 years older than him. he was attached at the hip to her when he was little, but as they both got older he distanced himself more to give her breathing room. he's still close with her now, but she lives out of state working as a nurse

andrew has an older brother named wesley who is 5 years older than him. before turning, he was very close with him, as wes taught him a lot of "guy stuff" when he came out, and never once saw him as anything other than his little brother when andrew told him he was actually a boy. as aforementioned, wes is the only one who has ever had permission to call andrew drew/drewby. like asterion's sister hera, wesley is under the impression andrew died in an accident

ambrose has older twin sisters named alissa and mercedes who are 3 years older than him and an older brother named leo who is a year older than him. alissa and mercedes like to baby him, which he really dislikes, and leo tends to just treat him as a friend who just so happens to be his younger brother

xander has an older brother named michael who is 6 years older than him. they're very close, and mike was very protective of him (though not suffocatingly so) since he used to get picked on a lot growing up. he was especially protective after xander came out out of fear the bullying could get worse. he's the only one who ever calls xander al or lex. mike was also the older brother who had a "you can call me for a ride, no questions asked, once a month" policy, which was very handy to have in high school. mike lives in washington with their aunt lorraine as her caretaker, but the two of them come to california to visit every now and then

azur has an older sister named veridia who is 2 years older than him. azur isn't as close with her as he'd like to be, mostly because she can't stand his constant questioning of everything around him. she appreciates is desire to know things, but it can be exhausting for her at times. she's the one who came up with azur's nickname, azu

alcor doesn't have siblings in the traditional sense, but considers other demons of his specific race his older and younger siblings (demons of other races are friends/acquaintances depending on who they are)

arsène has an older sister named stacy who is 3 years older than him. they were close before arsène came out, but she grew distant because she felt like she "lost her best friend" when he started living his life as a guy. she still loves him, she just hasn't adjusted to the change as well as arsène had hoped she would. he doesn't speak to her because of The Horrors™ being enacted on him that have left him isolated for the last 3 or so years

rian has an older brother named chase who is 12 years older than him. they're a lot closer now that they don't live in the same house, as they had to share a room for a couple years when rian was finishing high school and chase had to come back home

artemis has a twin sister named polly who is 6 minutes younger than him. they're best friends who happen to be twins. they have a telepathic link to each other, which was actually how they both found out the other was trans, fun fact. they make fun of identical twins together for always being kinda.. weird? for lack of a better descriptor (like the ones who insist on marrying other twins n shit). she's the only person he doesn't mind calling him artie, since she isn't doing it to try to give him a "more masculine" name to use

attis has an older brother named juno who is 4 years older than him and an older sister named andromeda who is 2 years older than him. juno is the reason attis is really into wu-tang clan, and andromeda is the reason he learned to drive a motorcycle. attis has always admired both of his older siblings, even if they weren't always the greatest role models

alata has an older sister named rhea who is 10 years older than him. their larger age difference is the reason they aren't as close as they could be, but they still love and care for each other very much. rhea was the first person he came out to, and she was the only one in the family who referred to him correctly for a couple of years after he came out

avan has an older sister named delilah who is 4 years older than him. she hates him over her boyfriend taking advantage of him (a vulnerable, then 14 year old who was freshly out of the closet. her boyfriend was 18) when they were in high school

gaius has an older brother named kel who is 4 years older than him. he and kel were decently close, but there is a gap to bridge after kel actively stole money from him for over 3 months

ardalion has an older brother named hyde who is 8 years older than him and a younger sister named brooke who is 3 years younger than him. he's closer with brooke than he is hyde because of the age difference, but hyde is a good older brother to both of them

adam has an older sister named ramona who is 6 years older than him and an older brother named zhane who is 2 years older than him. ramona and zhane were very accepting of adam's powers after they kicked in during puberty, though the two of them were a little confused by the fact he even had powers to begin with. ramona is more playful, while zhane is more responsible. adam is the anxious middle

sunny has an older brother named dallas who is 2½ years older than him. they used to be close with each other, but dallas moved across the country for work, and sunny kinda sucks at keeping in touch with people, so they haven't spoken in about a year

aegnis doesn't have siblings in the traditional sense, but he considers the obsolete android models before him his older siblings

axel has an older sister named roxy who is 6 years older than him. roxy was the cool older sister who was into rock music and had too many piercings to count. axel modeled a lot of his fashion after her, though more masculinized, which made her very happy bc she appreciated not being the only "freak" in the family

adrian has an older sister named gina who is 6 years older than him. they're not very close since gina was a "problem child" and in and out of juvenile hall a lot. he used to be close with her when they were younger, though

amelio has an older sister named maria who is 4 years older than him and an older brother named adamo who is 2 years older than him. he doesn't get along very well with them because - like their parents - maria and adamo don't respect amelio's boundaries like they should

austin has 3 older sisters named rosa, haley, and tambry who are 9, 7, and 4 years older than him respectively. he's closer with tambry because they're both trans, so they share a lot of experiences (including negative ones with their father). they also have a joke that they traded genders, though austin came out a couple of years before tambry did. rosa is the peacemaker who tries to keep the family afloat/together, so austin doesn't get along with her a lot of the time since he sees it as her fence-sitting when it comes to the shit their dad does, while haley is the "problem child" who defends austin and tambry when their dad is being awful and fights with their parents (and sometimes rosa) on a regular basis

owain has 4 older sisters named indiana, paisley, linda, and dana who are 10, 8, 5, and 3 years older than him respectively. the four of them were thrilled to finally have a brother when owain came out. they already fussed over him for being the youngest, but it almost doubled when he told them he was actually their brother. they're kind of embarrassing older sisters, but very sweet. owain loves them, but they can be a little draining to hang out with for long periods of time bc of his social battery being on the weaker side. he's arguably the closest with dana since they're closer in age compared to indiana/paisley/linda. they're the only ones who call him tony (his parents call him anthony) and wain (everyone in his friend group and at his job calls him owain) interchangeably

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z0mbicide · 3 months ago

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okay, one random fact abt each of the menaces LET'S GO:

under the cut bc there are a lot of these fucks (affectionate)

asterion's favorite color is midnight blue

atlas lived in michigan from ages 12 to 15

agri has a visceral reaction to being called a freak bc in school he was always called "that freak zales" by a number of his classmates

arven is a stock boy at a sports shop

aeon did track during high school and college and is the fastest member of his friend group

andrew's brother had two nicknames for him: drew and drewby. he was the only person ever allowed to use them

ambrose hates surprises, and is the guy who finds his gifts early and opens them to see what they are (he always wraps them back up after)

xander dissociates when he drinks energy drinks

azur only likes coffee from his favorite family-owned coffee shop bc they're the only ones who make it the exact way he likes it

alcor really likes classic rock ("it scratches an itch in my brain."), and his favorite song is rock you like a hurricane by scorpions

arsène is a big prince fan bc of his mother, and his favorite song is lovesexy

rian loves trash tv, and his favorite reality shows are 90 day fiancé and catfish

artemis has a younger twin sister and they swapped middle names when they both came out as trans, but kept their birth first names by choice

attis exclusively wears tanktops (but will wear jackets if it's cold)

alata loves gorey horror movies

avan collects i-dogs, and his favorite is the i-dog soft speaker

gaius gets severe migraines if he doesn't use his future sight for long periods of time

ardalion got his first nickname(s) from agri

adam is a licensed healer, but since that doesn't really.. pay the bills, he works at alata's flower shop

sunny chose his name at random and isn't very attached to it; his parents guilted him into keeping his birthname, but he's still thinking about changing it anyways now that he lives on his own

aegnis has never listened to music bc he's always in the lab he was built in, and the technicians don't really play music while working

axel is an editor at a publishing office, but his real dream is to be a musician

adrian is a side sleeper bc he gets sleep paralysis when he sleeps on his back

amelio's favorite color is pink, but he doesn't wear it often

austin and ambrose met at a green day concert (at 17 & 18 respectively) and they dated for 2 years before breaking up when ambrose graduated from the university they went to

owain loves chocolate and his favorite kind is dark chocolate

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