#cause like what if there just so happens to be a super dirt cheap flight...then what

[junkdyke]

as another stupid dumb dyke who makes bad life choices, I am 100% on team "fly to Denver"

dawg i flew across the entire country to meet a girl and get rejected to my whole face, i have learned my lesson askdjads i am not against making these bad choices but i have GOT to be more sure about it before i do it, i can't keep doing this to myself 💀

[vanta000]

they get investigated by the government bcz of this but luffy has a surprisingly large wealth of knowledge on the legal system and is able (with the help of the friends he’s made along the way) to game the system and keep robin hidden. either way this place has made headlines and has expanded into more of a resort. shanks is reading this shit on the papers in nyc and laughing his ass off (while simultaneously doing something mega-illegal[the reason he took the trip])

and i should mention that magical shit still happens here so chopper is still a deer. i imagine they found him because luffy wanted to take his boat out one day and forced everyone else (including vivi, an ambassador from another country that got involved with a gang and jumped them once when they went out fishing) to go with him, and in the hawaiian islands they found a winter one and just grabbed the talking deer and took it with them. brook washed up on shore one day in a coffin and they housed him in the motel while they caught a flight to the mainland to beat up californian dracula (gecko moria) so yeah. jinbei just showed up on the shore one day because the politics in atlantis were getting too heated and he needed a piña colada and back massage

all this to say that the customer experience is kinda wild. some example reviews:

“Lovely service, the beach is beautiful and the rooms are spotless. The staff are prompt but a little strange. I’m pretty sure I saw the manager talking to a raccoon….”

from a hollywood star that visited the place talking on her podcast: “The food is incredible but the service was slow and waiter was outright cruel to my date.” she leans into the camera and whispers- “I’m no conspiracy theorist, but I swear to god I caught a glimpse of a skeleton peeking in through my window when I was changing. And I was on the second floor!”

I could go on with these reviews but I’ll just add one more from like a 4chan post:

>Be me

>Visiting the motel that’s been on the news out of sheer curiosity

>Don’t believe any of the rumors but go anyway

>Arrive, am greeted by a drop-dead gorgeous girl who guides me to my room

>I notice my wallet is missing all my cash

> I think she robbed me? What the hell

>I stick around anyway

>The room, drinks, food, and service is great, 10/10 experience and for dirt cheap (minus the robbed cash)

>Day 3 out of 4, wandering around

>There’s a sign

> “Private nude beach: do not enter”

>

>Ofc I try to enter it

>Grab a bag, towel, water and my shorts and charge right in

You’re not gonna believe me here, but I swear to god this happened. I couldn’t believe it either.

>I walk down this long ass path through the woods

>On the verge of giving up kinda long

>Finally make it to the beach

>I see a bunch of girls

>I think im super lucky

>Take one more step forward

(you will not believe me)

>I see they have FISH TAILS

>I’m not kidding. Every single one of them has an honest to god FISH TAIL from the waist down

>I JUST ENCOUNTERED FUCKING MERMAIDS

>AND THERE’S JUST A DUDE STANDING THERE TALKING TO THEM

>This kid is standing there (on two legs!) happily chattering with mermaids

>He notices me

>I bolt. Call me a pussy, but I did

>Spend my last day there in shock

>The owner comes to greet me when I check put for some reason

>ITS THE SAME DUDE.

>He shakes my hand and stares at me cause he KNOWS

>I bolt even faster than before. In the car, on the plane, I’m outta there.

I’m a total conspiracy theorist now. I can’t get it out of my head. But I sweat to god it’s true.

…..I might go back?

Idk why i chose to write an entire greentext but I did anyway. Maybe that would have been better if I wrote it as a reddit story but eh what’s done is done. You get the jist.

one piece motel au where shanks owns a shitty motel near the beach in a tropical town called the straw hat, but then he leaves on like a vacation to like new york for a year and during that time entrusts the thing to a random ass neighborhood kid he befriended (luffy) who's not even his and now luffy is recruiting a bunch of random ass people into his business.

[frop]

do all of them you mother fucker

not Once but Twice u have done this to m 

Star Platinum – Your thoughts on the stars? i always did like then when i was younger but now they just make me think of jojo so now i especially like them 

Magician’s Red – Do you know any magic tricks? no but im gonna say what u said and i can bend my fingers waay way farther than most people

Hermit Purple – Show a photo of yourself! I HAVENT taken a selfie in forever i’ll do one later 

Silver Chariot (Requiem) – How much sleep do you need on average? i would love a good 10+ but i only get that much on saturday now boo but on average its like 6-7 

The Fool – Tell us a joke! Is your refrigerator running? Because i’m gonna suck your dick

The World -  A place you want to visit? canada like you would not believe 

Crazy Diamond – What do you treasure the most? hmmmmmmm my friendships with my friends 

The Hand – Do you like your hands? nnnot particularly bc i spent a good portion of my life and still do sometimes where i bit my nails til they bleed so they dont look as nice as i’d like them to be when they grow out 

Echoes – Your favourite sound? The world’s time stop sound, but not jotaro’s version, dio’s specifically

Heaven’s Door – Share a secret! my parents’ divorce has made me scared for the future of my own relationships to the point where i can see myself not ever wanting to be in a relationship ever again bc it would be easier than my partner getting tired of me or hating me. on top of the fact that i’m almost exactly like my father and my mom’s ex fiance in every single emotional department which is what caused their divorce/breakup respectively in the first place and that leads me to believe that in the long run i am Romantically  Unlovable 

Killer Queen – How would you like to die? preferably quick and painless 

Bad Company – What kind of character trades do you dislike? any character that is like ‘waahh wah no one understands me bc i enjoy [’highly advanced’ niche series/book/etc] and they all read [popular series/book/etc] like whatever the fuck his name was in aku no hana, it got so obnoxious i had to drop it lmao 

Red Hot Chili Pepper – Can you handle spicy food? cat’s out of the bag guys im actually a Fake Mexican bc i only like mild stuff and hot chips 

The Lock – Anything you feel guilty about right now? ya but thats for another day 

Love Deluxe – Are you secretly in love with someone right now? its absolutely no secret that i am in love with jonathan joestar 

Pearl Jam – Your signature dish? i can make some mean ass rice apparently 

Achtung Baby – Do you want kids? nnnope no thanks never ever i have my cat and thats enough for me 

Harvest – Do you pick up coins in from the street? no bc u dont know where thats been and money is super dirty already 

Cinderella – Which part of your body do you like the most? dang, i guess my thighs? but lately i’ve been a lot easier on myself abt my stomach and how soft it is 

Atom Heart Father – How is your relationship with your father? pretty good bc we’re really alike in temperament too but sometimes it gets pretty awkward bc he can never see me as anything but his little baby daughter who Never Grows Up

Enigma – What is puzzling you currently? when is davidpro gonna drop the part 5 teaser 

Earth Wind and Fire – What’s the best classical element? i personally have always liked fire 

Stray Cat – Cats or dogs? i love both but man im more suited for cats 

Gold Experience – A precious experience you have not shared with your followers? oh man over this summer my dad his gf and me and my sis when on a trip to her dad’s place in this really small town that was like 3 hours away from our city and it was so nice and quiet and peaceful and i felt so clean and happy there, we were only there for a couple days but ever since i’ve really been wanting to go back

Sticky Fingers – Zippers or buttons? zippers are so much faster but they get caught sometimes so Really, pros and cons of each 

Moody Blues – A song that makes you sad? OOO man i was gonna say epitaph bc Of Course but as i was writing this down melancholy man by moody blues came up on this playlist and now im thinkin abt abba and crying 

Sex Pistols – Have you ever shot a gun or riffle? no im tiny and a weenie and i would probably die from the recoil

Aerosmith – Are you afraid of flights? ive never been on one but i am scared of heights so i cant imagine thats any better 

Purple Haze – What makes you really angry? it used to be not being listened to but now i just let it happen bc Why bother but now its more whenever my mom makes a big deal out of simple mistakes of waiters/waitresses or when shes being obviously racist 

Spice Girl – Your favourite spice? idk what its called but theres this one i like to put on fruit before i eat it to make it Spicy 

King Crimson – Is it possible to predict the future? man idk my mom says yea but who knows 

Black Sabbath – How easily do you trust people? like stupidly easy 

Man in the Mirror – Do you like looking into the mirror? nope lol im ugl. ALSO bc i have a bigger than average fear of reflective stuff in general bc what if i see somethign behind me u kno,,,, 

Beach Boy – Have you ever been fishing? nope! the one time my dad went that i knew abt i was in mexico 

The Grateful Dead – What do you want to be remembered for? honestly, anything else that being the ‘way too nice one’ or the doormat 

White Album – Your favourite CD? aaaaa i dont have one i dont really listen to albums 

Talking Head – Are you a good liar? i guess ? i can keep a pretty straight face but its harder to lie to someone i actually know really well bc they can probably tell what my tics are 

Baby Face – Your thought on babies? theyre cute but i would greatly prefer to never have any 

Metallica – Do you like listening to metal? yea

Green Day – Ideal way to spend a day off? sleep, Sleep, stream with friends and lay in bed

Oasis – Best place for a holiday? hhhhh anyplace that relaxes u tbh 

Stone Free – Are you a indoor or outdoor person? i n d o o r i dont like bugs 

Kiss – Who would you like to kiss or get a kiss from? jonathan joest

Burning Down the House – Ever destroyed something and then regretted it? nah, once again im a weenie and im too worried abt consequences to ever do smth like that

Foo Fighters – Your favourite drink? god damn i fucking love raspberry iced tea 

Diverdown – Your thoughts on diving? the ocean fills me with the fear of god. no thanks 

C-Moon – What would you do for your friend’s sake? put myself in bodly harm 

MadeinHeaven – What do you believe happens after you died? nothing tbh you just end up in a grave or urn or wherever u wanted to be put 

Weather Report – Your favourite weather? man i looove love stormy weather 

Whitesnake – Your thoughts on snakes/reptiles? i love them theyre all gorgeous and beautiful

Tusk – Tea or coffee? coffee

Ball Breaker – Your favourite ball game? to play? its basket ball but to watch baseball 

Oh! Lonesome Me – Do you feel lonely right now? no not right now but im sure it’ll happen soon 

Scary Monsters – Your favourite dinosaur? i love velociraptors and also triceratops !!

Cream Starter – Do you usually wear make up? nope and if i do its only ever lipstick

Catch the Rainbow – Your favourite colour in the rainbow? blue and green!! 

Ticket to Ride – What was the last ticket you bought for? i didnt buy it but the last one i had was for the rogue one like. 2 weeks ago

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap – Do you believe in the multiverse? i dont think abt it too often but sure

In a Silent Way – Do you enjoy complete silence? yes!! besides some music, i cant concentrate otherwise 

Soft & Wet – Shower or bath? shower bc its easier but i havent taken a bath in forever 

Paisley Park – How good are you with reading maps/directions? Terrible God Awful

Nut King Call – How good are you at assembling/constructing things like Ikea furniture? hmm it depends if i have the manual for it and if i have time to really think on it and im not in a rush or anything

Paper Moon King – Can you do any origami? nope 

King Nothing – Your favourite smell? i really like the smell of cinnamon 

BornThisWay – A strange habit you have? i crack my fingers all the damn time and i like to take off the little plastic circle off of soda bottles and chew on it 

Les Feulies – Your favourite plant? oh damn hmm i like lavenders 

Fun Fun Fun – Something you really enjoy doing? man. i could watch jojo a million times over and i’d never get bored of it 

California King Bed – What size is your bed? currently i sleep in a queen size bc my mom and sis and i share a bed bc we only had one room in our old apartment but now that we moved im sure i’ll be kicked off into a twin soon enough 

JESUS christ ok its almost midnight i hope ur happy you mother fuckre