#cats are true angles to menace creatures! but they are so adorable🥹💛

[honey-lemon-goose]

'You barely had enough brain power to comprehend this all.' Wine drunk and trying to save a cat, a true hero indeed😌👏👏 "For fucks sake carrot I don't have time for this.” CARROT!? SKSJEIKSISJS OML THAT IS SUCH AN ADORABLE NAME FORNA ORANGE KITTY🥹😭💛 'Oh, to be a cat.' No but for real though, especially with a good ass owner!? Talk about set for life!!🫡 'He opened it after a moment, his hair a mess and his eyes all sleepy.' Ajsbsuwnjs awhh sleepy Jongho🥺💛 “What do you need?” “You.” AHHHHHH I would have passed away on the spot!! Literally would see my soul leave my body😱💀 “We can't all be hercules, man.” frfr Jongho not all of us can break apples in half like they are nothing!!!👀👀 'Muscle man laughed' idk why but Jongho being called muscle man killed me🤣💀 “Are you…the ramen?” Damn. Cheesy pick up line got me🫠 But like it's Jongho in my head saying it so I feel as though that is justified😗😌

...ramen before you go? choi Jongho (m)

🍜 pairing ⇢ neighbor!Jongho x (fem) reader

this story is based on true events I have actually experienced. (Cat stuck in sauce can, cat stuck behind appliances) but sadly, no Jongho to the rescue. #saucecat

🍜 synopsis ⇢ you thought things couldn’t get worse after finding a cat in the dumpster behind the liquor store, but now here you were, alone in your new apartment, staring at that damn cat that somehow got stuck behind the washing machine. You needed some strong hands….but the minute you met him, you didn’t want him to leave. Do you want some ramen before you go?

🍜 genre/au ⇢ next-door neighbors au, comedy, smut, fluff

🍜 warnings/tags ⇢ 18+ minors DNI, shower sex, completely unhinged and does not make any sense. this is all over the place and just for fun, so please have a good laugh, comedy to smut, oral sex (female receiving), hair pulling, cream-pie, profanity, jongho is the cat savior, and also a little sleepy and drunk off beer

🍜 word count ⇢ 2.8k words

🍜 taglist ⇢ @jjhmk @yesv01 @roe-sinning @meowmeowminnie @yeritheloml @yukine-smx @y00nzin0 @8tinytings @halesandy @shegotboreddsoo @kangyeosangelic @sanshineeeeee @kodzukein @hwaightme @likexaxdaydream @ssaboala @gtr-skyline-lover

ateez masterlist

Your life flashed before your eyes.

Well, your cat’s seventh life, that is.

“I swear to god, I’m gonna go fucking insane.” you hissed. “I literally just found you and you already lost seven out of nine lives.”

You stared at your little troublemaker, the cat you found in the alleyway behind your favorite liquor store in the dumpster. Surely enough, he still caused the same amount of trouble since the very first day you found him. 

The situation was even worse, especially because you were four glasses in on your red wine. You barely had enough brain power to comprehend this all.

He stared at you, bug-eyed, through the glass that surrounded his little head—an empty spaghetti sauce glass he had found in the trash can. You were in the middle of moving  into this apartment. Boxes were all around you, your furniture not even set up yet, but here your cat was, stuck in a sauce can and sitting there like he did nothing.

For fucks sake carrot I don't have time for this.” you groaned, looking around quickly for paper towels. When you realized you didn't even have utensils out, yet alone paper towels, you let out an aggravated noise and waltzed over to your cat. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

You grabbed onto the glass container, gritting your teeth while pulling it gently.

“Meow.”

“Dude, I'm trying to help you, dammit,” you growled, playing tug of war with Carrot. “Now sit still.”

Carrot, in fact, did not sit still. You let go after the first battle, letting out an irritated sigh before trying again.

After an ungodly amount of time, you were finally able to free the dumpster cat, only for him to look like he’s had war flashbacks. 

Covered in spaghetti sauce, Carrot looked like he was bathing in blood. You ran a hand through your hair as the little bitch stared at you like he was gonna screech. After a moment of uncertainty, Carrot licked his sauce-covered lips and waltzed away, still drenched in sauce.

“Come back here!” you yelled, but the more you followed him, the faster he went. You ran through your living room, covered with boxes, and down the hall to where your laundry room was. “I will literally break down right now if you get in that washer. Tears and everything. You better feel bad for me.”

Carrot turned around at those words, but then blissfully stared at the open washer. He had a habit of sleeping in it, and it did cross your invasive mind about how it would clean him up without the use of paper towels.

y/n, that would drown him. Shut the fuck up, brain.

“Carrot.” you swallowed your anger, knowing it was just your stress—and maybe the fact that in the last twenty-four hours, he ate your sandwich out of your hand, sat in the sink while the water was running, started hissing at his own reflection, drank out of your glass of alcohol, and got high of catnip and broke a picture frame. He was cute…too cute. You wished you could get away with his antics. “Don't. Touch. The. washer.” 

If a cat could smirk, you were certain that’s just what he did. With one swift movement, Carrot leaped into the washer, rolling around in it in sheer happiness. 

Oh, to be a cat.

“You know what? Fine! Roll around, do whatever.” you huffed, tossing your hands up in the air while turning around. As you tried to walk away from the devil himself, you heard a boom, a hiss, and a squeal. 

When you looked back at the washer, Carrot was no longer in it. He was nowhere in sight, actually.

“Carrot??” you said anxiously, only hearing a terrified meow, causing you to run over to the machine as quickly as you could.

“MEOW.”

You looked over the washing machine to see bright yellow orbs staring back at you as he moved frantically behind the block of metal. You desperately tried to pull the machine back, only to feel like a goddamn weak ass shrimp.

“I’m trying, I’m trying,” you breathed, groaning as you tried to move it. “Now's the time I am regretting quitting the gym.”

Several minutes pass—you were on the ground sweating like a lunatic. Carrot had gone quiet—he wasn't dead, just probably disappointed in your weak attempt to save his eighth life. He was most definitely shaming the hell out of you by now with his little judgy eyes.

As you thought about asking for help, you knew 911 couldn't save you now. Or ever. 

So you did what any sane single woman would do after finding out a man lived across the hall.

You zoomed out the door to knock on his door.

He opened it after a moment, his hair a mess and his eyes all sleepy.

Awe fuck, did you wake him up?

Whatever, it's too late now.

“Um, hello?” he yawned, and as he did, you looked down at your watch to check the time. It was eleven at night, how could you totally lose track of time? 

Carrot.

“Hey, listen, um,” you sighed, running a hand through your hair as you noticed how good looking he was. “I need help. Are you strong? You look strong.”

He blinked at you, brown eyes picking apart your expression. His lips were pretty, his eyes were pretty, his arms looked….strong. Mmhhhmm. Yummy.

“I guess so.” he nodded, tilting his head at you. “What do you need?”

“You.” you spewed out, and then laughed at yourself. “Dammit, I mean, yes I do need you, but not like in any other way than your strong arms. I mean that would be nice bit uh..fuck, You seem like a very nice man….”

As you trailed off, it was pure silence, other than the war cries of Carrot in the distance.

“I need you to free my cat from his imprisonment.”

“You need me to do what?”

—

“You couldn't move a washer?”

You and the strong gorgeous man stood in the middle of your laundry room, staring at the machine that held carrot captive. Strong man looked so sexy in his tight little t-shirt and sweats—god, you were so touch-deprived. Here you were creating scenarios in your head with a stranger that involved a washing machine…

“Oh, uh.” you gulped. “We can't all be hercules, man.”

He yawed, causing you to look over in his direction. He looked young, maybe younger than you, with blackish brown hair and glossy eyes. His body looked delish, if you could say so yourself. You would pounce on him right then and there if you could.

“All right, let me move it for you.” the minute he pushed up his sleeves, you swallowed your pride. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—

Within a second, he pulled the heavy machine with ease, letting out a sexy grunt that nearly made you moan. The wine was indeed hitting your slut system, for sure. The minute there was enough space for him to reach down to grab the garbage cat, he pulled him out, holding him far away from him after realizing how dirty he was.

“Carrot!! You’re alive!!”

“Yo, why is he covered in…sauce?” he made a face, turning to you with that gorgeous body of his. “And it’s name is carrot?”

“He was born in a dumpster. Old habits die hard.” You said as a matter of fact my. “And he’s orange. Self-explanatory.”

Muscle man laughed, setting the cat down. “I guess that explains it.”

A few moments of silence. You didn’t like the emptiness.

“….Do you think that’s why he loves the washer?” you wondered out loud. “Like, it looks like a mini dumpster. Probably feels like one too when he rolls around like an idiot.”

The cat savior laughed shyly, but his eyes said otherwise.

“You know,” you pondered as he looked at you as if he were going to tear you apart. “I don't know your name.”

“Jongho,” he mumbled, a smile finally reaching his eyes. He still looked so tired, but you were too selfish to let this opportunity go. “And you?”

“y/n.” you smiled, looking him up and down like a crazy person. “I just moved in.”

“I know.”

“You know?”

“Mhm. Watched you fall down the stairs and play it off earlier. I was gonna help, but you seemed like you would have been embarrassed so…” he started to laugh. “Sorry. I should've helped you.”

You smirked. “Well, you made up for it now.”

You stood close, unaware how close you actually were. He smiled down at you while you looked at his lips.

“I should go…” he hummed, eyes narrowed on you.

“Yeah,” you breathed.

He looked at you lustfully for a moment longer, and then broke away from the trance to walk away. You followed him to the door, but right before he could leave, you blurted out the only thing on your mind.

“Would you…like ramen, you know, before you go?”

He was facing away from you, and as you said those words, he stopped in the middle of the doorframe. 

“Depends…” he murmured, turning around to face you. His eyes were no longer sleepy, rather they looked murderous. “Are you…the ramen?”

You nodded. 

“Mhm.” 

He smirked. 

“I guess I can eat.”

You crossed the distance, tugging on his arm to pull him to you as you slammed the door behind him. You shoved yourself onto him, pressing his body up against the door, lips colliding at the same time. 

His hands ravaged your body, moving from your hair, to your face, to your waist, to your ass. He moaned into your mouth causing you to arch your body into him like a cat.

“Wanna move this into the shower? I need a shower.” you breathed against his lips as he kissed you. 

“Mhm.” he moaned against your lips, picking you up with that superhuman strength of his. “Where is it?”

“Last door in the hall.” you slurred, his arms holding onto your back and your legs. He held you like you were a feather, hot damn.

He walked blindly towards the bathroom, bumping into the walls and door knobs aggressively. You gripped the back of his head, kissing him like you knew him forever.

You didn't even know him for ten minutes. 

This is a new low, y/n. A new low.

Oh well, hot guy trumps embarrassment.

The minute he found the bathroom, you nearly tumbled into the room as he opened the door. He pressed you up against the wall, tugging at your lip with his teeth like an animal.

You slid off of him to turn on the water, sparing no time to undress him like a mannequin. He stood there, a boyish smile on his face as you pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his toned body. He was stunning, my god.

“It must be the beer I drank,” he spoke lustfully. “But damn, you’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Ditto, hercules.” you hummed against his lips as you unbuttoned his jeans, smiling into a kiss. “Now shut the fuck up.”

He undressed. You followed, although he seemed inclined to pull your clothes off himself. He had a goofy smile on his face as he tugged your bra off, making you smile with him.

“So pretty,” he whispered, tugging you back into him with a giggle. You stumbled into the shower, freezing cold water hitting your back and dripping down your head, drenching you from head to toe. You would have cared about the temperature any other time, but you were too focused on sucking this stranger's face. He didn't seem to mind, either. 

You tasted the coldness of the water on his lips, your hands running up his bare skin to reach his hair. He moaned into your mouth as he bucked his hips into you, breathing heavily.

“I want you to eat me out.” you moaned as his hands danced at your hips. “That was our deal.”

He smirked, burying his head into your shoulder as the water pounded against you. “You want what?” he pestered, tongue dancing in your mouth as you lost your train of thought. “I didn't hear you.”

You groaned, tossing your head back. “I said I want you to eat me out.”

“Eat what?”

“Me. Out.”

“Me out what?”

You shoved him against the cold tiles of the shower wall, glancing down at that sinister smile of his. “I want you to fuck me with your mouth.”

His hands smoothed your curves, his eyes everywhere on your body. “Alrighty then, no need to get harsh.” he laughed, gaining pleasure from having you repeat those words over and over again. “I heard you the first time.”

He knelt down in the shower, his lips meeting yours immediately. His hands were gripping your thighs, and you couldn't help but admit you liked seeing him, or any man, on their knees for you. His tongue slid through your core, igniting an eternal flame that only he could extinguish. He looked up at you through those long eyelashes of his, and you gripped his head, pulling his hair like your life depended on it.

“Fuck.” you hissed, slamming your head back against the wall. “Don't stop.”

He hummed against you, his hands moving to grab your ass tightly. Every time he moaned it felt like a wave of electricity was flowing through your body—an intoxicating feeling on top of the wine.

He pulled back, even after hearing your command. As he looked up at you from his lowly position, it made you feel like you could rule the world.

“I would like to fuck you, you know, with more than just my mouth.”

You shivered under the coldness of the water—and his touch. “Yes, please. Go right ahead.”

He smirked at your response, standing up and gripping your hips without a word. He then shoved you up against the tiles, positioning himself just right, only to shove himself in like he owned the place. You gasped at his sudden entrance, your walls tightening around his dick.

He pumped into you, holding onto your waist from behind and pressing his other hand against the wall. You moaned as he quickened the pace, and either you were too lost in his trance or the wine added to the feeling, but you were so far gone that you didn't even notice when he picked you up mid stroke, holding you to his body as your back pressed against the wall. He fucked you silly, like he did it a million times before. You couldn't get enough of him, even if you just met him today. He was all you needed. 

“Come inside me,” you groaned, your tone serious. His movements slowed at your words,  unsure of what to do.

“H-huh?” he continued to pound into you, but he was reaching his high way sooner than he wanted to. “Into you? Are you on the pill?”

“Pfft. yeah. Fuck children,” you shut your mouth, hating yourself for saying that while he was literally inside you. “That sounded bad, jeez. What I’m saying is you can come inside me. Please.”

He laughed at you, but was too focused on finishing that he ignored your craziness. His breaths began to quicken, his hips bucked in shallower movements as he reached his climax. You let out a cry as you felt the warmth of his come coat you from the inside, dripping down your thigh as his head fell onto your shoulder.

Your shaky breaths tangled together, the water slowly feeling colder and colder as you looked at each other.

And then you both laughed.

“I…wow.” Jongho laughed, setting you down slowly so he didn't hurt you. 

You quickly reached to turn off the water, not holding back the string of curse words attached to your tongue.

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck. “That was fun.”

He smiled at you, leaning in to kiss your lips, once again like he’s done it before. “It’s nice to um…meet you, y/n. I don't think I ever said that yet. It’s not like I met you twenty minutes ago or anything.”

“I’m hoping you’ll keep coming over to rescue my cat…” he mumbled, a knowing smirk on your face. “And to eat some ramen once in a while. A lot in a while, actually.”

“Mhm. Just knock on the door, I’ll be at your service.”

Still in each other’s arms, you were unsure about your future with the cat savior, but yet, this was just enough. It was strange, but enough.

For now, at least.

“So, is now the right time to tell you I’m ready for round two?”