#casual touch is the air in my lungs

[theindiscreetbookworm]

me: sits down to write a sexy sword fight fix-it fic

also me: at 7000 words, takes a break from the reconciliation angst and kisses to write found family crew cuteness

[starlightxsvt]

Sibilance. | j.ww (M)

synopsis ➳ ❝ he is always getting in trouble and it is your job to get him out each time. the problem is, the more time you spend with him, the bigger trouble it becomes for your heart. in the end, who will get you out? ❞

pairing ➳ lawyer fem!reader x rich badboy!wonwoo

genre ➳ smut, slight angst, good girl bad boy trope ig

word count ➳ 4.9k + 800(patreon bonus)

warnings ➳ mentions of fighting, injuries, bruises, reader wears glasses, dom!wonwoo, big dic!wonwoo, messy makeouts, degradation(he calls her a sl*t during seggs), unprotected intercourse, reader is lowkey down bad for him(aren't we all), male oral(reader's first time giving bj), slight nipple play, cream pie, rough sex, no aftercare, open ending ;D

A/N: yes this is a repost

You step out of the police station, the click of your heels echoing against the smooth, shiny floor leading down to some stairs. With your phone pressed to your ear by your shoulder, you shove the documents into your bag and try to zip it closed, all while listening to the Chairman, your richest client over the phone.

“Yes Chairman, I will get him home right away.”

The call disconnects as you manage to zip your bag, a sigh of relief falling from your lips. You allow yourself a moment to breathe, a moment to inhale a lungful of the cold night air. After how hectic the past hour has been, the only thing you need right now is a drink and a solid eight hours of sleep.

However, you will not be getting any of that.

You find Wonwoo standing a few feet ahead of you, his back facing you as he waits there with his hands in his pockets, kicking stones on the ground and looking around with boredom.

This man is the creator of the biggest chaos. He should come with a neon sign flashing on his forehead that reads “trouble.”

You close your eyes and take a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself to deal with him without losing your professionalism. “Mr. Jeon, let me drop you home.”

The tall man turns around as you approach him, and a wide, mischievous smirk graces his lips, “How many times have I told you not to call me that, Princess Lawful?”

Pushing your frames up your nose bridge, you narrow your eyes at him, not appreciating his hearty attitude.

“I don’t get paid enough for your bullshit, you know.” You comment under your breath, reaching into your pants pocket to search for your car keys.

“Oh please,” he rolls his eyes. “You are like what— twenty seven? And you have a five figure income monthly.”

“Whatever,” you grunt, fishing deeper into your seemingly endless pocket before finally finding your key. Wonwoo comes closer to you and casually snakes an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to his body, his firm chest bumping against your arm as you stiffen up from the contact.

“Don’t worry, I will ask my father to give you a raise,” he leans down to whisper in your ear, making your breath stutter. Despite the cold weather, you can feel your face heat up, the dangerous proximity messing with your brain. It is all too much— his touch, his smell, his voice, a lethal combination that makes your knees weak.

You look at the taller man, in the back of your mind wondering how you ended up here. After graduation, you were lucky enough to get a job at one of the most reputable law firms right away.

Maybe not entirely luck, but through your hard work. You had sacrificed your youth, eyesight and skin for the job as you came out the top in your class. The plan was to work nine to five and within a year or two, end up with a fat paycheck every month. Things were going according to your plan until earlier this year when you made a huge breakthrough in a very important case that even your seniors were struggling with. That got the attention of your company president, Mr. Pi who immediately had you put in the legal team of the Jeon family as a junior advisor. He said there was an empty position and you would be the perfect fit. He promised that the workload would not be too much as you would primarily assist the senior lawyers in their tasks and the pay would be good.

It was a mistake to believe Mr. Pi.

The first time you saw Wonwoo was in the early morning on a Monday, one week after joining the Jeon family’s legal team. As you were sneaking sips of coffee from your tumbler in a meeting room full of old men discussing boring things, Chairman Jeon, Wonwoo’s father barged in followed by the trouble stirrer himself.

Wonwoo stole your breath the moment your eyes met him for the first time.

There was something magnetic about him. Other than his drop dead gorgeous looks, broad shoulders and tall build, there was something in his aura, something in the way he walked and carried himself that charged a room with tension and stole everyone’s attention. Once his eyes locked with yours, he stood in front of the door for seconds that felt too long, the look in his fox shaped eyes changing. They flickered with mischief and some amusement as he tilted his head to carefully scan you, a subtle hint of smirk growing at his lips.

For a moment you had forgotten where you were, letting yourself get carried away in his hypnotizing gaze and attractive smile, the little nicks and cuts on his face increasing his appeal by a hundred times.

He was trouble. You knew it right away. You saw it in his eyes, the mischief, the defiance, the chaos he could not wait to cause. He was your polar opposite in every sense and you knew he picked up on it right away. And you also knew you would not be able to get him off your back.

That was indeed, true.

Wonwoo’s first ever case that you handled was assigned that fateful morning. His father gathered everyone to brief about the situation that went down. Wonwoo had gotten in a fight at a bar the previous night, breaking a guy's arm and it was your job to compensate and cover the issue as smoothly as possible.

It has been quite a while since then and for whatever reason, Chairman Jeon always ordered you to handle his son’s cases. Of course, you could not say no to him so for the last ten months you have been working like a dog, cleaning up Wonwoo’s mess everytime he got in trouble, which was often.

It was during one such time, about three months ago, after you had gotten him out of the police station, that the mistake happened.

You slipped and caused trouble for yourself, committing something that altered your course of life.

You slept with Jeon Wonwoo.

Things have been messy since then. Not for him but for you. He definitely has more control over you now, crossing your professional boundaries whenever he pleases.

You are left in ruins, emotionally.

Wonwoo is an attractive, complicated man and you can’t help that you are attracted to him. There is obvious palpable tension between the two of you but ignoring that, you know very well the type of guy he is.

He is not boyfriend material. He is not good for your heart.

Yet now, as your body is pressed against his in the cold winter night, you cannot prevent your heart from dangerously thudding in your chest, a heated feeling rising in your belly.

“Take me home, Princess Lawful,” Wonwoo says, squeezing your shoulder. “I had a long day, you know?” There is an innocent whine in his tone and you can’t help but wonder at his duality.

“Fighting people?” You throw an annoyed look at him, freeing yourself from his grip and marching towards your car.

“Among other things,” he chuckles, his tone is light and playful as he jogs to catch up to you.

Thirty minutes later when you turn off your ignition in front of his house, you look beside to see him asleep in the passenger seat. No wonder it was so quiet in the car. He sits with the seat reclined, arms crossed over his chest as he faces the window in his side, the black locks of hair falling over his eyes.

In the dim light coming from a nearby street lamp, you admire the man next to you, your hands instinctively reaching to touch his face. Once again, your heartbeats quicken, a lump forming in your throat when you try to analyze this strange feeling in your chest. The tip of your index finger brushes his cheek, right below a cut and his lips form a knowing smile.

Your blood runs cold as you snatch your hand back.

This bastard was awake.

His eyes open, the piercing gaze making your breath stutter in your throat. “What dirty ideas were you having, hmm?” He smirks, leaning closer.

You immediately duck your head low, fiddling with your seatbelt in the dark to yank it open.

“I knew you were admiring me.” He easily snaps off his belt and resting his arm on the armrest between the two seats, he tilts his head lower to meet your bashful eyes. “Were you going to kiss me, Princess Lawful?”

You inhale a sharp breath before your hand moves on its own accord, ready to slap him. Wonwoo, however, catches it, his bony fingers wrapping around your wrist in a gentle yet firm grip as you lock eyes with him.

As always, he is calm and poised, a lazy smirk on his face, looking like he has the entire universe and beyond in his palm.

Wonwoo has this effect on you, this weird thing where words get stuck in your throat and your brain fumbles. Right now is one of those as your eyes remain locked with Wonwoo’s hypnotic gaze, leaving you unable to look away no matter how much you want to. Slowly, he pulls your hand towards him, his lips to be exact, as you watch with horror how his lips come in contact with your knuckles.

Suddenly, it is sweltering inside the car even though it is below zero outside. You are brought under a spell as you watch with parted lips how softly, sensually Wonwoo’s lips trace kisses over your knuckles and the top of your hand. The sensation shoots tingles throughout your entire body and at this moment, Wonwoo could ask you to bring him the moon and you would do it.

“Come inside.” His voice is feather light but you know he demands it.

Fuck, no, you cannot let this go on.

You snatch your hand back, shifting in your seat to be as far from him as possible in this confined space.

“I have an early day tomorrow,” you object, not meeting his gaze.

“Oh come on,” He almost whines. “I am injured, you know.”

You turn your head to look at him with skepticism. He watches you with a pout on his lips, his eyes shining as if he is a child waiting for candy. It is a complete whiplash from his previous attitude.

“Don’t believe me?” He sits up straight, determined to prove something as he turns on the overhead light. Then pulling up his windbreaker and his turtleneck, he shows you his lower back where, on the left side there is a big, purple mark blooming.

You gasp, immediately pulling the material of his clothes higher to get a better look. “My god, how did this happen?”

“The guy pushed me real hard. Hit my back against this table.” He explains casually, fixing his clothes. “Come on now, help me treat it.” He announces, not sparing a glance at you as he gets out of the car, his movements relaxed and confident as if he is sure you will follow him.

You do so silently, matching his pace as he approaches his house, the faint crunch of gravel beneath your feet the only sound. He climbs the small steps leading to the front door, its polished surface gleaming in the soft glow of the single overhead porch light. The neighbourhood is very posh, with picture-perfect houses standing at equal distances, their elegant designs glowing softly under the street lamps. The chill in the air adds a crispness to the atmosphere, as the two of your footsteps break the silence where no one is stirring.

Wonwoo’s fingerprint unlocks the door with a beep and he immediately steps inside. The door remains open as you linger in the cold night air outside, hesitant.

“What’s wrong? Do you really enjoy standing out in the cold?” The man cranes his neck to look at you.

With a soft sigh, you step in.

The minute the door shuts closed behind you, Wonwoo’s mouth latches onto yours. He attacks you almost, passion overflowing from him as he presses you against the door in a frenzy.

You knew this would happen. Yet you came in.

There is no one at fault but you.

He shoves his tongue inside you, tasting your mouth like a starved man while his hands do a quick work to shake off your coat from your shoulders. The warmth from his body blankets you in an addictive sense of comfort, his hands moving to hold both of your wrists in a bruising hold against the door.

There is no escape.

Your body submits, relaxing against his as you let yourself feel every bit of the sensations. When Wonwoo pulls away, the space between the two of you charges with tension, the heat increasing with the way his dark eyes bore into yours.

“I have been wanting to do that for a while now.” He breathes, his voice gruff. He lets go of your hands and skims his fingers on your back, pulling down the zipper of your blouse.

Your lips are swollen, his bruising kiss lingering on your lips as you unconsciously lick them, trapped in the dark pools of his eyes.

You are so ruined.

Wonwoo takes a few steps back, his fingers working deftly to remove his windbreaker and his turtleneck. You see him wince due to the bruise when he moves his body and you stop him with a gentle hand on his arm.

“Maybe we should get a look at that first.”

Wonwoo scoffs and you know he will not listen to you. You are about to force him when he takes off his trousers that leaves him in his boxers only and all thoughts fly out of your mind when you see the bulge forming in them.

Wonwoo sports that cocky, insufferable look on his face. “Stop drooling, Princess Lawful.”

You frown, ready to refute when he utters the next words that stun you into silence.

“On your knees.” The playful expression is gone from his face as he looks at you dead in the eyes, palming himself through his underwear.

You are a frozen statue, waiting for him to repeat himself because there is no way he just said that.

“Don’t keep me waiting,” he grunts, yanking you closer to him by your arm. He looks down on you as you feel his breaths on your skin when he whispers. “Get on your knees. And take your top off. I want you to suck my cock. I want to see that nerdy face choking, messy with tears.”

Your throat is a dessert. Your eyes are wide with horror, your hands clenched into tight fists as you try to wrap your head around his dirty words. Wonwoo easily pushes you on your knees, your mind still trying to catch up with what is happening. He, in fact, removes your blouse for you, leaving you in your nude coloured bra as goosebumps break into your skin. His intimidating bulge stands in front of your face and you sense a rush of panic within you.

There is no way you can do this.

Fuck, this is your first time giving a blowjob to someone.

But you cannot let him know that. You would rather plunge yourself in the cold sea and get eaten by sharks. So, with the same determination that helped you finish law school with straight A’s, you set out to prove yourself. With trembling hands, you pull down his boxers and the image of his long, thick length is daunting, immediately making your throat hurt.

Wonwoo's hands snake around your neck, his fingers caressing the base of your low pony as he pushes your mouth closer to his dick.

Shy and unsure, you hold him using both hands, the hard, warm member a foreign sensation beneath your fingertips. Your tongue darts out, giving his tip a kittenish link.

“Stop playing,” Wonwoo warns. “You know how to suck cock, right? Or do I need to teach you that?”

Offended, you push your glasses up and wrap your lips around his tip, sucking on his precum. The breathy sigh that parts from Wonwoo’s lips indicates that you are on the right path. You continue sucking, covering more of his length, adding an inch bit by bit to get used to the feeling of him in your mouth.

Wonwoo, however, does not have the patience and he extends an arm to the wall to support himself while using the other to hold your neck as an anchor as he starts to thrust in and out your mouth in shallow movements.

“Fuck, you look so hot like this,” he pants, his eyes trained on your face, your swollen, spit coated lips wrapped around his length as you look up at him with doe eyes behind your steel frames. “This is my new favourite scene, Princess, you dressed for work and on your knees for me.” He grunts, increasing his pace, his thick length going deeper and making you choke.

The entire scene is so erotic, his filthy words paired with gurgling noises coming deep from your throat and tears that blur your vision. Between your legs, your pussy throbs with pain as an urge to touch yourself grows. You can not do that due to the layers of clothes still covering your lower half so you press your thighs together, focusing on getting him off.

You hollow your throat to the best of your capability and his length goes in deeper than before, prompting you to choke and pull back your mouth from him, bursts of cough coming from your lips.

In front of you, Wonwoo stands, panting harshly as he rubs his slick length, his dark eyes watching you wipe your tears and spit while trying to stop the coughs. “You look so hot right now.” He breathes, the dark depravity in his voice making you look at him.

“I want to come on your face so bad but more than that, I need to get my cock inside you. Fuck you so good you will feel me tomorrow morning when you are at your meeting.”

You can only blink as your pussy throbs at his promise. By now, you are sure that your underwear is a soaking mess.

“Stand up, Princess Lawful.” He orders with a smirk on his face. You immediately comply, standing on shaky legs. Wonwoo wastes no time to press your back flat against a nearby wall, his fingers rapidly working on taking off your belt. He unzips your dress pants and pulls them down halfway along with your underwear in record time. His eyes remain focused on your core and you shy away from his gaze, covering yourself with your hands. He immediately pushes them away and easily slips a finger inside your wet core.

“Oh god,” you moan, your eyes falling closed. Wonwoo scoffs, a cruel smile of lust kissing his lips as he whispers in your ear, “Fuck, look at you. You are dripping. Did sucking my cock turn on so much?”

You nod, an arm coming up to hold his shoulder, the firm muscles feeling so good under your touch.

“Say it,” he commands, using his free hand to grip your face in a firm hold, squishing your cheeks.

“Y-yes.” You whisper, chasing his fingers with your hips. You need him inside you so bad you are going insane.

“Good little slut.” He grins before lining himself up with your entrance and thrusting his entire length in one swift motion.

“Fuck!” The first thing you feel is pain, the entirety of his thick length shoving inside you so hard you swear you feel him in your belly.

Deep in the back of your mind, there is the sensible part of you who shakes her head at your desperation and carelessness. Even though you have an IUD, you still should have used a condom.

That is the issue, all common sense and logic fly out the window when you are near this man. That is why he is so bad for you, for your heart.

Wonwoo suddenly presses his lips to yours, breaking your train of thought. His tongue moves inside your mouth in tandem with his thrusts as your entire body jolts at the force. His fingers hold your ass and the back of your thighs in a bruising grip as he drives inside you mercilessly, each thrust harder than the last one.

You are going to come right away.

Wonwoo however decides to stop. His grip on you loosens as a harsh pant comes out of his mouth, his eyes scorching with animalistic lust.

Then, before you can question or protest, he roughly tugs on your arm, pulling you with him as you two cross the short distance to his bedroom. Standing in front of the bed, he unceremoniously pushes you on the soft mattress, murmuring. “Lie down.”

You do as told, shuffling back into the bed with confusion as Wonwoo fully takes off your trousers and your underwear.

“I can fuck you better like this, on the bed.” He grins as an explanation, making heat rush to your face. Not wasting time, he slides back inside you, a low groan of pleasure falling from his lips at your warmth. The sound makes your pussy clench around his length as a soft mewl falls from your lips when he hits that sensitive spot within you.

“Fuck, keep making sounds like that and I will come right now.”

You once again clench at the idea and a smirk graces Wonwoo’s lips. “You want that, no?” He increases his pace, his right hand tightly holding your waist while his left hand slips down a strap of bra from one of your shoulders, exposing your breast. He squeezes your breasts, pinching and tugging at your nipples which heightens your pleasure. You throw your head back, your fingers gripping onto his arms as you whine, “P-please, I want to come.”

“Such a good slut, begging so nicely.” He huffs, using both hands to grip your waist, his cock driving deeper inside you than ever before due to the angle. Your legs shake and your toes curl as you taste your orgasm coming. 

Wonwoo leans on top of you, covering your body with his as he licks his way from your collarbone and below, all the while moving in and out of you. His lips wrap around your nipple as he sucks and bites and finally the coil in your belly snaps.

Your body spasms, a loud cry of pleasure falling from your lips as you are thrown over the edge and taken away by your release. Wonwoo spurts inside you at the same time, his low groans of pleasure and strings of curses sounding like honey to your ears.

For some time, you find yourself lost in your head, your senses fading into the background. Time slips away as you enter a trance-like state, the aftershocks of pleasure radiating through your body and paired with the day’s exhaustion, you feel like you are floating away on a cloud of bliss and ecstasy.

After a long while, when you are fully back in your senses, you see Wonwoo lying beside you, his eyes closed. Judging from the way he is breathing, he seems asleep. 

The clock on the wall reads 10 pm.

A soft sigh escapes your lips as you sit up on the bed, your joints feeling sore.

You can not shake the overwhelming pity you feel for yourself.

This is what happens when you cross the lines with a guy like Wonwoo.

Alone and exhausted, an emotional mess as you drown in self pity while the guy that has ruined you physically and emotionally sleeps away peacefully. 

Even asleep, he radiates an exquisite beauty, bathed in the soft, golden glow of the lights that fill the room. As you gaze at him, you find yourself wondering what it might be like if this were love rather than lust—if you could stir his heart to race and flutter as yours does for him.

How silly. How pathetic.

With weary steps, you move through his house, first going to the bathroom to clean yourself before gathering your scattered clothes and putting them on. You are about to leave when you suddenly remember the bruise on his back.

With a sigh, you take an ice pack from the refrigerator and wrap it in a towel. Then you pull out the first aid kit from the bathroom cabinet, slightly annoyed to find it untouched and brand new, just like you left it a few months ago. He has yet to use it no matter how many times you requested him to. 

Shaking your head, you place the kit on the bedside table, taking out some compression bandage and a painkiller and placing them outside and within his view. Then, finding a sticky pad, you scribble some notes and stick them on the bottle of the pills, hoping he sees it and follows your instructions.

When you are done setting everything, the man is still fast asleep, his face squished against the mattress as he lies on his front. Gently, you tiptoe near him and peek at the bruise on his back.

He will be in pain later for sure.

Tentatively, you place the ice pack on his back before quickly stepping out of his bedroom. The towel will diffuse the chill so he will not wake up immediately, giving you enough time to leave. 

As you drive your car through the quiet neighbourhood, you make a promise to yourself.

This was the last time you crossed boundaries with him. 

You loathe this emptiness in your soul as you drive away from him late at night, feeling discarded after a quick fuck when all your heart desires is to lay in the warmth of his arms.

That is not your reality and you accepted it. 

From tomorrow, there will be no you and Wonwoo beyond the professional responsibilities that tie you together.

—

NEXT MORNING, 10 AM

As soon as the meeting is over you head for your office and sink down on your chair, sagging into the leather with a deep sigh of relief. The delicious aroma of the coffee heals you as you take a sip, a soft groan falling from your lips.

Today is going to be a long day. You definitely should have prepared better for such a day because being sleep deprived along with a throbbing ache between your legs is definitely not the way to go about it. 

You realize Wonwoo did keep his promise as you can still feel him between your legs, the memories and sensations of last night still too vivid. 

Shaking your head at the unwelcome thoughts, you begin pulling out all the necessary files from your bag and spreading them on your desk when there is a knock at the door.

You look up and before you can tell the person to come in, the door opens.

Wonwoo steps in, making your heart shudder as if the mere thought of him has summoned his physical presence.

He looks dashing as ever, sporting his signature cocky smile as he closes the door behind him. “Good morning, Princess Lawful.” He chirps.

Frowning, you push up your glasses, not finding his presence amusing. You remember the events of last night and the promise you made to yourself. Now is the perfect time to honour it. 

“What are you doing here?” You question, standing up from your seat.

He pouts, approaching you. “Am I so unwelcome? Had some business nearby. Thought I would drop by your office.”

“Do you have anything to consult with me?”

“Yes,” he hums, his gaze sultry. He comes closer to you and easily wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you against his body, his eyes fixed on your lips. Once again, you are overpowered by his touch, smell and everything he makes you feel.

This must stop.

Mustering all your strength, you push him away with a firm hand on his chest. The man stumbles back, looking at you with confusion. With a deep, calming breath, you take a step back and focus your gaze on him, your sharp eyes piercing through his.

“This is over.”

“What?”

“Whatever we were doing…messing around, it is over. I am done.”

“What?” His mouth is agape. He looks absolutely stunned as if your words make no sense to him.

“Mister Jeon Wonwoo, I do not owe you any explanation.” Your tone is sharp, matching your gaze. He frowns, his eyes going dark as he mirrors your gaze. “From now on, I will not be seeing you outside of work, is that clear?”

You see his jaw clench. He inhales a sharp breath, the soft sound cutting through the air fizzling with tension.

“Fine,” he spits with eyes filled with an accusatory intensity so heavy that you feel a physical weight. “Whatever you say. Let's not see each other again.”

You nod, stiff.

You know very well it is a lie. These words are a mere facade of an agreement, bound to be broken. You will see him again for you are two magnets with fierce, crackling attraction. 

Nothing can keep you apart. 

The air thickens with heavy tension, your sharp gazes locked with each other, cutting through the air and charging the atoms with an unending flare. If someone listened closely, they might even hear the hisses of sparks forming and spreading all over.

Sibilance, they call it.

want more of them? head over to my patreon and subscribe here to read their first meeting from wonwoo's pov!

A/N: before y'all think this is the end let me share my plan. so I will be turning this into a series which I will upload from time to time. they will be short episodes, kind of like a slice of life story which will mainly focus on the relationship of these two and their growth. so buckle up, because their journey is just beginning! as always, if you enjoyed reading this, please reblog and share your thoughts. i would love to hear what you guys have to say and what expectations you have from this couple!

on a side note, can we just talk about the overwhelming response of the teaser? like 1k notes in such a short time and also for just a teaser? y'all really love bad boy wonwoo huh. i was pleasantly surprised by the numbers it was doing, even better than a few of my full length fics. not complaining tho! ><

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[captain-hawks]

you want to blame it on the sheer amount of people packed into mattsun’s small, tenth floor apartment—the way it’s suddenly difficult to breathe.

at least that’s what you mutter to makki as you excuse yourself and head toward the balcony’s reprieve, your drink forgotten on the coffee table as you step out into the frigid winter air.

but fuck if the familiar, warm scent of iwaizumi’s cologne doesn’t invade your nostrils a moment later anyway, something you’re beyond embarrassed to recognize with your eyes closed.

you don’t turn around as the sliding door clicks shut, eyes trained on some unremarkable landmark in the distance that you can’t quite make out in the darkness. and as he comes to stand beside you, forearms leaning on the metal handrail inches away from your own, you’re not sure if the slight shiver that wracks its way down your spine is from the flakes of snow that have begun to settle on your bare arms or his maddening proximity.

you can’t fucking stand it—this unceremonious collapse of your lungs in his presence, the blistering heat that prickles down your neck and closes tightly around your throat.

something soft and warm settles around your shoulders, and your throat goes dry as the zipper of his jacket brushes against your neck.

“where’s your girlfriend?” you ask, hoping the question doesn’t sound as pathetic as you feel.

it’s funny how these things work—you spent years trying to get over your silly high school crush, only for all of it to come crashing back down in your lap gathered at the bar with friends celebrating his return to japan after uni.

it’s funny—the way you could hardly remember the name of the guy you were casually seeing in that moment as you watched iwaizumi walk in with a pretty girl clutching his elbow.

iwa laughs quietly, and it’s a little rough, a bit self-deprecating. “where’s your boyfriend?”

it’s funny—the odd curve of his tone on the last word.

“don’t have one,” you reply, casting him a sideways glance, his expression unreadable.

“she told me she wanted to move to japan with me,” he says carefully, exhaling a cloud of warm air as his gaze sweeps to the skyline.

your heart sinks.

“and?”

“and i told her i wanted to break up.”

you whip around to face him, convinced you heard him wrong. “you what?”

he reaches across the space between your bodies, hands grasping the bottom edges of the jacket and zipping it up to your chin (and it’s so goddamn reminiscent of the way he used to chide you for not dressing properly on the walk to school that you sway a little on your feet).

you can’t help the way you nudge his foot in return just like you always used to—it’s muscle memory, more than anything else.

and yet you’re not anticipating the way he still follows up in kind, hooking a foot around the back of your ankle, muttering about your shit choice of shoes in the dead of winter. while it’s hardly a tap, it’s enough to make you take a step forward in surprise as the lines between the past and present begin to blur, stumbling slightly.

two hands at your waist steady you, and despite the layers between his palms and your hips, your nerve endings ignite.

“coming home made me realize that even moving to the other side of the world wouldn’t stop me from wondering,” he says softly, snowflakes accumulating in his mussed brown hair.

“wondering what, iwaizumi?”

he doesn’t answer you for a moment, just stares at you with an intensity that makes you briefly question the physics of spontaneous combustion.

“what it’d be like to hear you call me by my name for once,” he murmurs. “what it’d be like to do this, if you’d let me.” carefully, he traces the curve of your bottom lip, his touch feather-light.

your legs wobble, just a little, and iwaizumi’s left hip and thigh press up against you. it’s a weather phenomenon, the way everything goes quiet during snow fall—but it’d all be drowned out either way right now against the erratic thrumming behind your ribcage.

“i missed you, hajime,” you whisper, the syllables heavy on your tongue—they’re at odds with this dizzy lightness in your chest.

his eyes fall shut for a beat, lips curving upward in a faint smile, his fingers twitching subtly at your waist.

you begin to lean forward, and there’s a quiet sigh of relief that falls from his lips before he cups your face in both of his hands, his mouth crashing into yours.

[theemporium]

[4.7k] the four times carlos encourages lando to confess his feelings to the youngest sainz sister and the one time where he's had enough and takes matters into his own hands.

.

New Years’ Eve, 2020 

It was a few minutes past eleven when Carlos found him hiding out on the balcony. 

There was something so overwhelming and intoxicating about New Years Eve, something that seemed to bring so many strangers together for the end of year celebration. That was the exact reason he had practically begged the Spaniard to fly out to London after the holidays, to spend the night drinking and laughing and celebrating with him to bring in the new year. 

The night had started out great. He had been surrounded by friends and friends-of-friends. He had been drinking some awful concoction Max had made that was far too sweet for his taste. He had been badly singing along to the songs blasting through the speakers and dancing—both badly and proudly—in the living room of someone's mutual friend’s house. 

But then things started to get suffocating. The buzz of the alcohol started to wash away, thoughts and reality started creeping in and, suddenly, Lando didn’t want to be stuck in the middle of a group of strangers who didn’t seem to understand he didn’t want to be touched and jousted around or hugged. 

He needed space. He needed fresh air. He just needed to be alone. 

His lungs were burning as he took deep breaths of cold, crisp air. He let it overwhelm him, let himself focus on the fact the cold was starting to seep into his bones. He let himself focus on the present moment, rather than the millions of racing thoughts in his head. He let the loneliness ground him. 

But just as quickly as that relief came, it ended.

“Why are you hiding out here for?” 

Lando’s eyes instantly snapped shut as he gripped the railing, wrapping his fingers around the cold metal before he lifted his head and turned to glance over his shoulder. The Spaniard stood by the door, the buttons of his shirts undone and his cheeks flushed from the drinks he had been downing all night. His eyes were a little glossy and dazed, but his smile remained as he made his way over to the Brit.

“I’m not hiding,” Lando answered, though the response was weak and Carlos could see right through him. 

“So standing on a balcony alone whilst everyone parties inside is a British New Years tradition I didn’t know?” Carlos mused as he leaned against the balcony, his body turned towards Lando. “Try again.”

“I just needed a breather,” Lando said with a casual shrug of his shoulders.

Carlos’ brows furrowed together. “From what?”

“Just…things,” he muttered, his eyes cast down as he spoke. “I’ll be back inside in a couple of minutes. You didn’t have to come out here.”

“Of course I did, you’re my friend,” Carlos scoffed, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “What’s wrong?”

Lando shook his head. “Nothing is wrong—”

“Lando,” the Spaniard said his name in a softer voice, and something about it made his eyes well up a little. It was stupid. It was so stupid—and maybe the alcohol was playing a part—but he felt oddly emotional, and he didn’t like it. “Friends don’t lie.”

“I guess I’m just not in the mood to start a new year, that’s all,” he grumbled, feeling a bit like a whining child but it was the truth. There wasn’t much in the upcoming year that he was genuinely excited for, at least nothing that was coming to mind tonight. 

“Just because we aren’t teammates anymore doesn’t mean I’ll abandon you,” Carlos said, resting a hand on his shoulder until the Brit finally looked at him again. “We are friends, Lando. Nothing can change that. Not even Charles.”

“We’ll hardly see each other,” he whispered in a soft voice.

“I’ll make time,” Carlos promised, but it still didn’t seem to be enough to put the boy’s racing mind at ease. “You know the best part of us not being teammates anymore?”

Lando froze, his brows furrowing together and he almost looked offended that Carlos could find a positive in the whole situation when his chest felt tight every single time he thought about the Spaniard in the Ferrari garage instead of the room right next to his.

“What?”

And before Lando could even question the glint in his eyes, he found his eyes following Carlos’ gaze as they both glanced back into the raging party inside—or, more specifically, where you stood in the middle of the crowd, laughing and smiling and having the time of your life.

“There is nothing stopping you now.” 

Lando’s head spun back around to look at Carlos, his brows furrowed together. “Huh?”

“Lando,” he said his name like it said everything. “I’m not stupid. I’ve seen the way you look at her.”

Lando let out a noise mixed between a scoff and a nervous laugh. “What? No! I—”

“Lando,” Carlos repeated, and the boy quickly pressed his lips together. “I know you didn’t want to do anything because you were scared you’d cause something but…we aren’t teammates anymore. There’s no conflict of interest. You can ask her out.”

“I don’t like your sister like that, mate,” Lando attempted to laugh off, shaking his head.

Carlos shot him a look. “Really?”

“Mhm.”

“So, you don’t care if she kisses someone else at midnight?”

And truthfully? He felt his stomach churn at the idea. He felt like he could keel over the balcony railing and empty his guts there and then at the idea of witnessing it. The boy had spent the last two years pathetically pining after you, he had time to get used to seeing you with someone else and yet, it still made him feel physically unwell. 

But as pathetic as he was, he was also a coward. Because even if it would kill a part of him to see you kiss someone else when he so desperately wished it was him, he would still rather throw himself off the balcony before he confessed his feelings for you. 

“I don’t care,” he gritted out through clenched teeth. “Plus, you’re her older brother. Shouldn’t you be stopping guys from coming near her?”

Carlos sighed, shaking his head. “You’re being a muppet.”

“Yeah well, it’s not the first time you’ve said that.” 

Lando had told everyone he had drank far too much that night, but the truth was that he couldn’t stomach anything after watching you kiss some pretty blond guy when the clock struck midnight. 

.

Summer Break, 2022

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“No, I’m not. You’ve done this on purpose.”

“It’s just a few prawns, Lando.”

“And they are making me gag!”

“They aren’t even on your plate!” 

Lando glared at the small shellfish on Carlos’ plate with his nose scrunched up in disgust, a clear look of disdain on his face. He should have known the Spaniard would torture him in some way, shape or form when he invited him out for lunch. Lando just honestly assumed it would be Carlos teasing him in front of you, he didn’t realise fish would be involved. 

“That is disgusting,” Lando muttered with a frown.

“You are just dramatic,” Carlos scoffed. 

“Hey, give him a break,” you lightly scolded your older brother, an easy smile on your face as you pushed your pasta around your plate. “In his defence, he did look a little green when they brought it out.”

“I did not,” Lando huffed, his cheeks flaming up in embarrassment. “This is bullying. You Sainz folk are bullies.” 

You snorted.

However, Carlos only rolled his eyes in response. “It is not our fault that you have the taste palate of a five year old.”

“I should have just taken Max on his offer to play FIFA over this,” Lando muttered, letting out an exaggerated squeak when he felt the Spaniard pinch his side. “Hey! Hands to yourself!”

“I thought you liked it when us Sainz folk touch you,” Carlos retorted, a glint in his eyes that made Lando’s cheeks go redder. 

“Don’t be silly, cabrón,” you spoke up, a look in your eyes that matched your mother’s. “He’s just like that for Mama. Little Lando Norris likes older women.”

“I think you’ve mistaken me for Verstappen,” Lando countered. 

You opened your mouth, a witty reply undoubtedly on the tip of your tongue and something in his chest buzzed in excitement to hear it. He liked it when you did this. He liked the snarky back and forth, like some weird twisted foreplay. He enjoyed the thrill it gave him, the fact your attention was purely on him and his words. 

But the universe seemed to be against him as the shrill of your phone ringing interrupted whatever you were about to say, leaving you to excuse yourself as you quickly headed outside to take the call. 

“For the love of everything holy, please just tell her.” 

Lando tore his eyes away from the large glass window at the front of the restaurant where he had watched you animatedly talk to whoever was on the other side of the phone—not that he was jealous or anything—and instead focused on the older Spaniard next to him.

“Huh?”

Carlos shot him a blank look. “Lando.”

“Not this again,” he grumbled under his breath.

“Yes, this again!” Carlos argued as he leaned over to pinch the Brit’s side again, narrowly avoiding his hand being swatted away. “It’s been years!”

“I don’t like her like that,” Lando argued, watching as Carlos went to open his mouth, but he quickly continued. “And even if I did, it’s been years. I wouldn’t like her like that anymore.”

He didn’t think it was possible for Carlos to look more exasperated. 

“You bought a camera,” Carlos stated like it was the most obvious and incriminating piece of evidence against him. 

“I wanted to take up a new hobby,” Lando said with a casual shrug of his shoulders. 

“So, you choose photography?” 

“Yes.” 

“And it has nothing to do with the fact my sister offered to give you lessons and tips?” Carlos questioned with a knowing look. 

“That was just a happy coincidence,” Lando argued. 

“Mate,” Carlos sighed, heavy and exhausted, as he gestured towards the camera sat beside his plate. “You’ve literally been carrying that thing around everywhere you go in hopes it will start a conversation with her. Just ask her out.” 

“Did it ever occur to you that maybe I just wanted a new hobby?” Lando retorted, feeling as though his face was on fire because he was right. Carlos was always fucking right. But that wasn’t something he would ever admit, especially right now. “I was thinking of starting an insta account for my photos.”

“Really?” Carlos deadpanned.

“Mhm,” he hummed, nodding his head. 

Carlos opened his mouth, arguments and exasperated pleas ready but was quickly cut off when he noticed you barrelling over to them with a massive grin on your face. 

“I did it!”

“What?” Carlos murmured, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“I got in! They accepted my portfolio! My work is going to be in the exhibition!” You all but squealed, your cheeks beginning to hurt from how wide you were smiling but you couldn’t stop. This was everything you had been working towards in the last few months and it was finally paying off. 

“Congratulations!” Lando said, a grin just as wide as yours spread over his face as he quickly stood up from his seat, ignoring the looks Carlos was sending him as he brought you into a hug. “I told you you would get it.” 

You pulled back, your smile softening a little as you looked up at the Brit. “You always do believe in me, Norris.”

“Always,” he replied, like it was instinctive. 

For the rest of the meal, Lando promptly ignored the messages Carlos kept sending him under the table and instead let himself bask in your happiness, in your smiles, in you. 

.

Silverstone, 2023

Lando Norris felt like he was standing at the top of the world. 

There was a buzz of adrenaline and excitement coursing through his veins, and he genuinely didn’t think his heart would ever return to a normal rate ever again. Blood was roaring in his ears as he crossed over the line, as he heard the murmurs of his race engineer in his ear confirming his position, as the screams and cheers of the crowd completely enveloped him as he pulled his car behind the P2 sign. 

His body was on autopilot as he pulled himself out of the car, running towards his team and throwing himself halfway over the barrier as they cheered and slapped him on the back. Their congratulations and praises washed over him as he tried to wrap his head around it, as he tried to process the fact he had managed a podium as his home race, like he always dreamed of. 

He couldn’t stop grinning as he went through all of the post-race routines, getting weighed and finding himself in the cool down room before he headed towards the podium. He basked in the cheers as he lifted the trophy over his head, as he slammed his bottle down, as he drowned himself in champagne.

Lando Norris felt like a fucking winner, if he was being completely honest. 

He had been grinning down at his trophy, gripping onto it like it was his most prized possession (and at that moment, it genuinely may have been) that he hadn’t even seen you barrelling towards him until your arms were wrapped around him and your body hit his with a soft impact, enough to make him let out a small oomph before the familiar smell of your perfume washed over him.

“I am so proud of you!” 

Something in his stomach fluttered widely at your words as he wound his arms around you, holding you tighter against him as he sunk into your embrace. His eyes fell shut, his face nuzzled into the crook of your neck and Lando believed that if he died right in that second, he would have died a happy and fulfilled man.

“Thank you,” he finally spoke when he remembered he hadn’t replied yet. “It doesn’t feel real.”

“You deserve it, especially after how this season started,” you said to the boy, your voice just loud enough for only him to hear as you held onto each other. 

He clung onto you, no plans of letting you go anytime soon as you both swayed on the spot but it seemed as though you were happy to stay there too. However, the unnerving sensation of feeling like he was being watched forced Lando to open his eyes, looking over your shoulder to find your older brother staring at him. 

‘Do something.’ Carlos mouthed to him. 

And when you eventually did pull back, teary eyed and looking at him like he hung the moon, Lando couldn’t help but let his eyes fall down to your lips. It would be so easy, so fucking easy. He could just lean down and press his lips against yours, feel the little squeak of surprise you would let out before you sunk into his kiss. He could imagine it so fucking clearly.

But the voice of reason in the back of his head managed to scream louder than the adrenaline pumping through his body and he simply threw his arm around your shoulders instead, guiding you towards where Carlos was standing. 

“Gonna celebrate with me?” 

“I’m gonna get you so many shots, you won’t even remember your own name, Norris.”

Lando ignored the disappointed look Carlos sent his way and instead focused on the positives. He wasn’t going to ruin your friendship when you had a good thing going, not when there was the risk he could lose everything. 

And Carlos was just going to have to mind his own business and deal with that.

.

Las Vegas, 2023

It happened so fast.

He didn’t even know what happened until his car finally stopped moving, when the rush of spinning and going hundreds of miles an hour came to a stop and the excruciating pain washed over his whole body.

It felt like someone was stepping on his lungs, making it really fucking difficult to breathe. His head felt fuzzy and heavy, his arms even fucking heavier. For a few moments, he couldn’t remember where he was. And then the sounds of the cars passing, the smell of rubber tires and fuel hit him and he couldn’t help but let his eyes shut as the disappointment of an unfinished race overwhelmed him. 

He could hear the team in his ear, begging for a response. It took him a few attempts before he was able to properly grip the wheel and hit the radio button. It took even longer to scramble out of the wrecked car, even with the help of the marshalls. Everything felt like it was moving too slow and, for someone like Lando who thrived on speed, it was disorienting.

It was like an out of body experience, like it wasn’t really him controlling his body. He just let himself be passed from person to person, someone always guiding him on where he should go. He didn’t argue with anyone as he was taken to the hospital, feeling far too tired to even try disagreeing. He just did what they told him. 

Test after test, observation after observation, talk after talk. Lando went through it all, feeling like a fucking pinball as he was tossed between different rooms and machines and doctors, but he didn’t say anything. He just wanted to lay down and sleep. He just wanted to pretend this whole weekend didn’t happen.

And when he was finally allowed to head back to the paddock to have a debrief with the team and pick up his belongings, the last thing he expected was for you to be waiting in his driver room.

“Gracias a Dios,” you breathed out in relief when your eyes settled on him, standing frozen in the doorway in a jumper that was far too large for him. But it was a passing thought as you rushed over to him, only to pause in fear of hurting him further. 

However, Lando just flashed you a weak smile and brought you into a hug, feeling your body sag against him.

“I was so scared,” you murmured into his chest, sniffling a little as you spoke. “They wouldn’t tell me anything. I threatened to cut Zak’s balls off if he didn’t at least tell me whether you were okay or not.”

Lando snorted softly. “He always was scared of you.”

“Good,” you grumbled before you pulled back, taking in his tired and weary expression. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore,” he answered, smiling a little when he saw your lips twitch upwards. “I’ll be fine. Just need to take it easy for a few days.” 

You nodded. “We can have an easy night in, just watch a movie or something.” 

And suddenly, it felt like someone was standing on his chest again.

“You don’t have to,” Lando said, shaking his head a little. “I know you’ll probably want to celebrate—”

“I don’t want to do anything except make sure you’re okay,” you interrupted, a note in your voice that he recognised as your unwavering stubbornness. “You can choose the movie. I promise I’ll only complain a little.”

Truthfully, how was he meant to say no to that? 

He tried to pretend like his heart wasn’t racing when you later made your way to his hotel room, sprawled over his bed as you flicked through possible movie options. He tried to pretend his stomach wasn’t fluttering with butterflies when you settled against the headboard, your shoulder brushing against his. He tried to pretend like he was so completely fucking normal when you grabbed one of his hoodies, pulling ot over your head before settling back into his bed. 

He was fine. So fucking fine.

Smooth Operator: this is your chance, muppet. tell her how you feel!!!

And despite Carlos’ message, Lando just enjoyed the night with you. After a crash that could have gone so much worse, he was just grateful to have your presence beside him, whether it was as a friend or something more. 

At least, that is what he kept telling himself.

.

Sainz Christmas Party, 2023

Despite the jokes made, Lando genuinely was an honorary member of the Sainz family. 

With some extra time spent in Monaco before he headed back to England to spend Christmas with his family, it was easy enough to stop over in Spain for a day or two to enjoy the annual Sainz Christmas Party before he headed home.

He had arrived the night before the party, presents in hand to give to the whole family despite their insistence that it wasn’t necessary. Something in his chest eased whenever he spent time with the Sainz family, that reassurance that even though he and Carlos are no longer teammates, they still cherish him the way he cherishes them. 

The party was as extravagant and lavish as it always was. The decorations were sleek and timeless, the wine was expensive and top of the range, and the food served to the many guests was some of the finest Lando had ever truly eaten. 

It felt like a home away from home as he stood beside Carlos Senior and Reyes, a glass of some fancy champagne in his flute as he laughed and chatted away to them. 

That same flute that was almost knocked out of his hand as Carlos came rushing towards him, muttering apologies to the other guests as he pushed past them and beelined towards the Brit. He placed a hand on Lando’s arm, giving his parents a strained smile as he did. 

“Lo siento,” he simply said before tugging Lando away from his parents and the rest of the crowd, leading him down some random hallways in the Sainz household. 

“Woah, Carlos, what’s wrong?” Lando questioned, abandoning the flute of champagne on some table they passed before he split it all. “Where are we going?”

“I need your help with something important and I need you to not ask too many questions,” Carlos stated simply, which only made Lando’s concern grow tenfold. 

“Carlos—” 

But the Brit barely got a chance to say anything before Carlos opened a random door and gave him a hearty shove as he stumbled into the small cupboard. The boy let out a noise of surprise, taking a few moments to realise he had stumbled into you before everything clicked. He whirled around, ready to give the Spaniard a piece of his mind, but the door was quickly slammed in his face and locked shut from the outside. 

“Carlos!” Lando yelled, banging on the door a few times with his fist, but it was useless. 

“No, I have waited five years! I’m sick of this! If you won’t do something about this, then I have to.”

Lando kept his gaze on the door as his cheeks burned in embarrassment. “I am going to kill you!”

“You can’t kill me if I never let you out.” 

His ears burned. “Carlos—” 

“You’ll thank me later. Feliz Navidad and don’t forget to look up!” 

The telling sound of footsteps rushing off made it clear that Carlos had quickly disappeared, leaving you and Lando trapped in the small cupboard for god-knows how long. The Brit let out a groan, leaning his forehead against the cold wooden door as he tried to settle his pounding heart.

“Ouch. I didn’t realise being trapped with me was that bad.” 

“No,” Lando quickly shook his head, guilt eating away at him but he still didn’t turn to look at you. “It’s not that, I just—” he paused for a few moments before he spoke again. “He’s only doing this because of me, I didn’t mean for you to get dragged into it.”

“Lando,” you murmured his name softly, a hand placed on his lower back and he could have sworn your touch had burned through the layers of his clothes.

“I’m really sorry—” 

“Lando,” you repeated again, your voice a little firmer and your hand remained where it was. “Look at me.”

He shook his head.

“Please,” you continued, and your voice tugged on his heartstrings too tightly to say no. 

Lando slowly turned around, a sheepish expression on his face as he took you in. You looked absolutely fucking breathtaking in the dark green dress you were wearing, the ends swaying and brushing against the floor when you moved. Your hair was curled to perfection, your makeup enhancing every feature to make you look prettier (if that was even fucking possible). But god, the best part of your whole ensemble was the smile you gave him. 

He would move mountains to see that fucking smile.

“Don’t apologise,” you said, shaking your head. 

“But—” He started. 

However, you just shook your head. “It’s Christmas.” 

He paused, frowning a little at your response. “Huh?”

“It’s Christmas,” you said with a knowing smile before your gaze shifted upwards, and he couldn’t help but follow your eyeline. Something in his stomach flipped when he saw the sprig of mistletoe hanging above you both. 

Lando swallowed harshly as he glanced back down at you, his eyes instantly landing on your lips. 

“It’s bad luck to break tradition,” you said, your voice barely a whisper as you spoke. And it took a few seconds. A few split seconds for Lando to truly wrap his head around everything. 

This time he didn’t let himself hesitate as he reached up, his hands completely engulfing your cheeks in his hold before he smashed his lips against yours. And just like he imagined—like he dreamt about—you let out a noise of surprise before you sunk into his embrace. 

Your hands fisted the lapels of his blazer, tugging him impossibly closer in the small cupboard until your body was pressed against his. You let out a desperate noise when his tongue darted against your bottom lip, happily letting the boy completely consume you and the air you breathed. His arms around your waist, keeping you close and tight like you were going to disappear. And god, neither of you wanted to pull away. 

“Shit,” he breathed out when he had to pull away, when his lungs were burning and screaming for air. He pressed his forehead against yours, your lipstick undoubtedly smudged against his lips but he didn’t care. No, he didn’t think he could ever care about anything other than kissing you ever again. “I have wanted to do that for so long.”

“I have been waiting for you to do that for so long,” you retorted, your hands smoothing the lapels of his blazer before they slid up to rest on his shoulders. “Five years, to be exact.”

Lando blinked. “What?”

And you smiled, wide and unbashful, and he thought the whole world stopped moving. 

“You weren’t subtle. But apparently you were too oblivious to notice the fact I liked you back,” you said as your fingers lightly traced along the collar of his shirt. 

“You knew?” His brain took a few seconds before he fully processed your words. “You liked me back?” 

“Like,” you corrected. “Otherwise I wouldn’t be locked in a cupboard with you hoping you kiss me again.” 

His hands squeezed your waist, a smile making its way onto his face before he could really stop himself. “I—” His cheeks turned pink, but he didn’t care. “Fuck, I think I’m dreaming.”

“You’re not dreaming, I promise,” you murmured as you tilted your head back to look up at him, eyes full of adoration that he had never really noticed until now. “But better late than never, right?”

“I’ll make it up to you,” he promised, and because he couldn’t help himself, he leaned down to peck your lips again. Though, it was a little hard when he couldn’t stop grinning. “I have five years of bad dates and secret makeout sessions to catch up on.” 

Your grin widened. “Promise?”

“Promise,” Lando murmured and, for the first time in five years, the tightness in his chest felt desired and wanted. The tightness was reassuring, it was the proof he had that this was all really happening.

“Merry Christmas, Lando.” 

“Merry Christmas, baby.” 

And maybe—just fucking maybe—he would thank Carlos for giving him that shove he needed to have the best thing in his life: you.

.

[appocalipse]

something good ⋆ bucky barnes

summary: bucky is about to go to war without confessing his feelings for you. you are about to watch him leave without confessing your feelings for him. that is, unless one of you gets up the courage to do something about it...

"I...need some fresh air. I'll be back."

Steve looks like he's going to argue with you as you push the chair out, but then you glance toward where Bucky disappeared in the crowd of people dancing, and Steve's face softens before he gives you a nod.

"We'll be right here," he says, pointing to your barely-touched drink. "Be careful."

The alley behind the bar is damp and quiet, cool from the rain earlier in the day but blissfully empty. You lean against the bricks and tip your head back, closing your eyes.

Steve was wrong — you should have stayed home.

He'd begged you to come out tonight; it wasn't just the two of them, he'd said, his eyes wide with hope. A few others had been invited, too, old friends who Bucky had wanted to see one last time before shipping out tomorrow.

And girls, of course. Girls with big smiles and bright eyes, who looked at Bucky as if they were hungry and he was a steak dinner.

To his credit, though, Bucky had asked you to dance first, and you'd said no. No, because it would have been impossible to act casually around him with your hands on his chest and his on your waist.

So, yes, you’d needed some fresh air after that. How could you not, when—

"Are you mad at me?"

You turn toward the voice that came from down the alley. Even though it's dark, you, of course, recognize him instantly, silhouetted against the weak light coming from inside the bar.

"Me? No, you—I'm not," you reply, your tongue feeling like it weighs three pounds. You attempt a smile. "What are you doing out here? You should be inside, enjoying your last night, no?"

Bucky shrugs and walks closer, but only far enough so you can see each other without straining.

"I was looking for you," he says, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Steve said you'd come out here."

"I'll go back inside soon, I promise. Don't worry."

He doesn't move except to kick a loose pebble away from his toe. "Why didn't you want to dance with me?"

Your stomach plummets at the question. He sounds almost hurt, and you wish you could explain yourself to him in a way that doesn't include blurting out your stupid feelings in the process.

"Uh...I don't know, I just...well, no reason," you stumble, wishing desperately that you weren't such an idiot. "I thought I'd keep Steve company while you...you know."

"Danced with the rest of them?"

You nod silently.

Bucky makes a scoffing sound before running a hand through his hair. "They're all the same."

"Okay..."

"It's not, uh, it's not what you think," he continues, taking a step forward, then back again as if he's unsure of how close to stand. "The girls — they're nice and pretty, sure, but...they're just not... I don't think they're my type, I guess."

"Uh-huh," you murmur, turning your gaze downward toward your shoes, suddenly finding it easier to look anywhere but at him. "Yeah, well, we better get back before—"

"Is there somebody else?"

The air in your lungs vanishes at his abrupt question, and you look up as your heart starts beating out of rhythm.

"Excuse me?" you whisper, surprised that you've even found your voice. "Somebody else?"

"Somebody that you...that you're seeing," Bucky says slowly, his words strained, as if every one causes him pain.

You stare at him for a second, hoping this is a joke, that maybe Steve put him up to asking these ridiculous questions — or maybe he's been drinking too much — because, surely, Bucky couldn't possibly be trying to ask you what you think he's trying to ask you.

"Bucky, let's just go back inside—"

"It's Steve, isn't it?" he cuts you off with the most absurd statement yet. His expression softens. "It's okay, really. If you are, I mean. He's a really good guy."

"Steve?!" You actually laugh at the absurdity of it all, shaking your head until the shock fades away into incredulity. "Jesus Christ, no! I mean, Steve is...he's like a brother to me, what...what the hell are we even talking about?"

"But...there's someone?" he asks again, sounding less upset than he had a few moments ago.

"No, not—no," you say, slouching against the wall and shrugging halfheartedly. "There's no one. Honestly, there hasn't been since..."

"Since when?"

Since I met you.

You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose and praying that a sinkhole will open up and swallow you whole. This has gone on long enough. "I don't know. It's...been a little while. I don't know what you want me to say, really."

"I just wondered."

"Okay, fine."

You start to walk back to the door leading inside, but Bucky moves so quickly that you run smack into his chest.

"Wait, just—"

He grabs your hand and holds it gently, thumb softly brushing along your knuckles.

Your breath hitches at the unexpected contact. You glance down at where he's holding onto you, then back up again, confused, curious, wondering if this is real and not some strange dream you'll wake up from any moment now.

You exhale with a shaky laugh when he lifts his other hand to your cheek and rubs his thumb across it, stopping at the corner of your mouth.

Slowly, so slowly, he leans in.

"Bucky," you breathe, his name soft on your tongue.

His forehead touches yours, and you reach up to rest a palm against his chest, feeling the steady thump of his heart beneath your fingertips.

"Do you not want me to...?"

He's never been this close to you, but everything about the moment feels familiar — the heat radiating from his body, the light scratch of his stubble on your cheek, the smell of him surrounding you.

You lift your chin slightly. "I do, but..."

"Just..." You feel the warmth of his breath on your lips; he's so close now that they brush against yours as he speaks. "I wish I'd...said something before it came to this."

"Before what came to this?"

"That I'd have...asked you. Proper, like. Dinner, movie. You know, the way it shoulda been. Before I...before I leave."

You stiffen at the word leave, pulling back so that you can look him in the eye.

"Bucky..."

"I wish I would've asked you to dinner. Would've loved to take you to dinner," he says, his eyes searching yours. "Wouldn't that have been nice, doll?"

A small smile lifts the corner of your mouth. "It would've."

"It could've been nice, you and me."

"I think it could have been."

"Yeah?" he chuckles quietly, lifting your hand and bringing it to his lips. He presses a kiss to the back of your fingers, then your palm. "I think it can still be. You see, I'm quite selfish. I'd like to go to war with something good to think of. Something — or someone — to come home to. That'd be worth coming home to."

"Like...Steve?"

It's a joke, of course, and Bucky, to his credit, does laugh, too. Then, he slips a finger under your chin and tips your face up toward his. You hold your breath as he dips his head to place a gentle, barely-there kiss on the corner of your mouth. "Not like Steve. No."

The music from inside the bar becomes louder, a woman's voice singing softly, sweetly. Stars fading, but I linger on, dear...

"I..." You clear your throat nervously, fiddling with the collar of his jacket. "You better come back to me in one piece."

"You gonna be waiting for me?"

You smirk. "I mean, I already waited this long, so I might as well—"

The rest of your words disappear into his kiss. You gasp at the sudden, almost desperate press of Bucky's lips on yours, but then he brings his hands to the sides of your face and kisses you more gently, more slowly, more purposefully, as if he has a lot to say to you in this moment but words fail him and the only thing left to do is this — to kiss you, over and over, again and again, to say, with his lips, with his hands, with every inch of himself...that he'll come back to you.

You whimper as Bucky's teeth catch your lower lip and tug before letting go. He pulls back far enough to look at you, to see your swollen lips parted. "So...that means yes, right?"

"Yes," you murmur. You slide your hands over his shoulders and into his hair, pulling his mouth back down to yours. "It means yes."

[acapelladitty]

Smoke Them All

Pairing: Cooper Howard/F!Reader

Fic Masterlist

Link to AO3

Summary: Not content with the litany of bruises and bite marks which he has littered across your skin, Cooper decides on something a little more permanent. (2.2k words)

(tw for: spanking, rough play, branding, fingering, orgasm, pain kink, dom/sub dynamics, subspace, allusions to cannibalism, cum eating, mild aftercare)

You hear the swish of his hand as it arcs through the air a split moment before the connecting smack rings out loudly and fresh fire flares in your unprotected ass.

"That's eight, little killer." Cooper muses as his open palm comes to settle against your skin, the flesh feeling raw and heated due to his vicious strikes, and his fingers trace the unseen outlines of his hand prints as they litter your ass. "You're almost warmed up for the main event."

Anxiety laced with a wicked arousal floods your groin, your cunt feeling slippery and neglected as you consider the small metal brand which sits in the nearby fire - the end balanced where the fire was at it hottest to ensure a clean imprint.

The brand had been his idea, a casual and sleazy comment given life by your own curiosity, but the spanking was just an added boon and Cooper was never one to deny himself the chance to dole out a little bit of good ol' fashioned discipline when the mood suited him.

So here you were, braced over his lap as the evening moon shone high in the sky. The surrounding area was dead of life, raiders and monsters having been long snuffed out, and any potential new onlookers had been provided their chance to scarper at the presence of the infamous ghoul. It was luck that the night air wasn't too chilled, not that it would have made a difference to either of you as you set about your combined goal.

The first few strikes had been pretty manageable as Cooper targeted different parts of your ass, quickly and efficiently trying to cover and redden up as much skin as possible while his other hand pinned your lower back to his knees. His tattered jacket flared out from behind him, the ratty ends touching the ground just beside your own fingers as you pressed them against the ground to keep balance.

Cooper, however, hadn't been as impressed with your easy management of his punishment.

C'mon now, little songbird, I want to hear that lovely voice.

And his efforts had quickly doubled as he brought his hand down with much more violence, the next two strikes coming in rapid succession as they glanced off the fullest part of your ass and stole the breath from your lungs. It was like being struck by metal. Hard. Unforgiving. And so fucking good.

He got the reaction he wanted as your playful groans dissolved into pathetic squeals when his fingers groped at the stinging flesh, your knees pulling together as you smeared the growing wetness that was developing between your thighs. The following hits were much the same, his accurate hand having targeted the same patch of skin until you could feel the heat buzzing free of the abused flesh as small whimpers stole from your throat freely.

"You're lucky I ain't using my belt, darling." Cooper growls as he disrupts your thoughts, tugging at your hair to force your head back enough to gaze up at him. "Cause the welts that leaves would paint you purple for a week and give you a harsh reminder of it every time that fine ass wanted to sit down anywhere."

"Yes, sir." Fumbling over the words, your fingers scratch against the dirt of the ground as your cunt feels swollen and painfully abandoned. You swear you could feel yourself dripping with mess but since he hadn't commented on it yet, maybe not.

"Might even use the buckle." Your scalp burns from his rough grasp and the extension of your neck makes breathing difficult as he continues. "Let it tear strips off you until you're a sobbing mess just crying out and begging for me to let up on you. You want that?"

Rubbing your thighs together at the open threat, you gasp and whine under his grip. From this position, you are barely able to make out his expression as your vision is also limited by the unshed tears which gather in your eyes, vision blurring due to the pain and frustration.

"N-no, sir."

"Good answer, darlin', cause i don't want to delay the next part any longer than we need to. You think you're ready for it?"

His hand releases your head and you nod frantically as fear lances your heart. A little masochism was fine by you, hot as fuck actually as it made the pleasure all the sweeter, but the brand would hurt like hell. Your heart beating a messy tune in your chest, your breath stutters as you feel him leaning over you to snatch up the brand from the fire.

"You gonna lie there like a good girl while I fix and mark you up? Hmm?" Cooper asked, his hand spreading your ass as textured fingers roll over the area he intends to mark on your right ass cheek. "I've got the rope ready to go if you can't hold still and let me make a clean print."

"Do it, Cooper." You gasp out, body shaking with anticipation as your eyes squeeze shut, preparing for the hurt to come as your hands visibly shake against the dusty ground. "Make me yours. Only yours. Make it so that everyone in the wastelands can see who the fuck they're messing with if they mess with me."

"Language." Tutting his disapproval with a playful hypocrisy, the rough excitement in his voice speaks of just how eager he was for you to have this mark. Well, that and the way that his cock remains pressing between you, the rock-hard length digging into your stomach with every slight movement as he speaks again.

"After this you're mine. Anyone else touches you then I take their throat. No mercy."

"No mercy." You repeat, almost a hypnotic babble as your breathing grows more and more erratic and anxious.

"I don't claim much in the wastelands, darlin', so you be good to me and I'll make sure that you never get the chance to forget what it means, you hear?"

"Goddamn, Cooper. Just do it! Mark me, brand me, give me something. Just- FUCK!"

It was nothing compared to the previous spanking.

The pain is indescribable as the metal presses harshly against your skin, searing his initials into the reddened flesh of your ass. You bury your scream in your forearm, tasting blood as your teeth clamp together roughly around your own flesh, and it's only his hand - hard as steel and twice as unforgiving - which prevents you from bucking in place to avoid the horrid pain.

Darkness dances in your vision for a moment as a genuine fear that you're going to pass out clenches your heart but it sweeps through rapidly, leaving you teetering on the edge of consciousness for only a few seconds.

You don't feel the brand pull free as the metal essentially kills off your nerve endings, the damage welcome as it dulls the initial shock. Rather, the initial sear is quick to settle into a vicious pain which is more like a deep, heated ache that sits beneath your skin.

"Cooper." You howl, fingers scrambling against his closet leg as you desperately seek something to cling onto as a wave of nausea rolls through your stomach. "Hurts."

Violently sobbing at the residual ache, you remain pinned in place as his free hand audibly drops the brand to the sandy floor before his fingers return to your ass. You can't feel him ghosting his digits along the wound but you're fairly certain that's what he's doing as a rumble of approval slips free of his chest.

"I know it hurts like a motherfucker." Cooper exhales, his roughened voice holding a giddiness as he watches you struggle to keep control of yourself. "But you did so well, girlie. Took it better than most would and I think that deserves a reward."

His fingers follow the curve of your ass to drop and press insistently at your hole - two digits sinking deep as they quickly provide a little relief to the aching neglect which your cunt was experiencing.

Audibly delighted with his markings, Cooper's tone is as predatory as ever as he slowly pumps his fingers into your cunt - following a pattern he knows drives you wild as he continues.

"Smells good too. Ain't gonna lie. Wish I'd taken a strip for myself before I burned it away."

Shivering at that, you moan out something that may have been an encouragement or a denial - your brain too fuzzy to make sense of it as his textured fingers rub along your walls.

"Coop-Cooper." You stutter out his name, sharp breaths feeling hot in your lungs as the adrenaline flushing through your veins - made all the worse by the dual sensations of dull pain and growing pleasure which wracked your lower half - causes a light-headedness which leaves you slack against his knees. "Touch me more. Make the pain go away."

"Can't make it go away, sweetheart. But I can make you forget about it for a minute or two."

With two fingers still curled within you, his thumb slides up your slickened folds until it grazes your clit. Body tensing, you sigh and groan as he teases the sensitive nub by gently circling his thumb across it. It didn't help that the leathered skin was so much rougher than a typical man's and the added sensation of it was enough to make you forget the burn of your ass as you focus on it.

His fingers are skilled and he is quick to target all those sweet, wicked little spots that make your mouth dry and your soaked cunt clench around his probing digits; that bastard thumb of his never letting up its teasing pressure on your clit as he strokes along the engorged nub with a lazy enjoyment. Adrenaline making every nerve feel heightened, your earlier neglect and enjoyment of his hand bring you close to the edge with an embarrassing speed.

"Such a tight little thing." Cooper grunts, his groin grinding against your stomach lightly as he plays you like a fiddle while taking care not to damage the fresh brand. "Can barely get my fingers out with you gripping at them like this. You'd have thought by now I'd have loosened you up at least a little."

Unable to speak, your reply is a mess of jerking nods and gasping pants. But he seemed to catch the jist of your agreement and it causes a low chuckle to rumble through his body.

Slipping a third finger in, the added stretch was all it took to have your toes curling against the air as the building tension in your body snapped into rolling waves of pleasure. Your cunt clenches around his fingers, pulling them deeper as they continue to rub against your sweet spot, drawing your orgasm out until your limbs felt tight and your throat started to burn from the constant whining and pleas that trickle free of it.

Shuddering and feeling faint, you lay limply against his knees, feet touching the ground as you actively fight the euphoric nausea which makes your body feel light and far off. It was too much and instead of facing the aches and pleasures, you allow the weariness to slip within your very bones.

A lurid suckling noise makes your head turn up to the side and you catch the sight of Cooper pulling his fingers free of his mouth, the digits slickened by both your mess and his spit as he messily cleans them off.

"Sweet as honey. Ain't nothing like it." He mutters, mostly to himself, before tilting his head down to meet your eye. "You alright down there? Not gonna pass out on me are you?"

Sighing out as darkness touches at the edge of your vision, you give him a soft smile - bottom lip only slightly trembling as you answer. "Sleepy."

He's surprisingly careful as he picks you up with his impressive strength, hands wrapping around your upper body to right you to your feet - shaking legs barely able to hold even your limited weight - before he deposits you in his lap. Angling your body atop his so that the pressure of your ass on his lap is far away from the fresh brand, your head presses against his clothed chest and you inhale the coppery scent that clings to him like it was a lifeline.

"Then sleep and I'll keep the beasts at bay."

Cooper speaks lowly, the words washing over you skin like a soothing blanket. "Here." His hands wrap the edges of his leather jacket around your sides, the material not enough to cover you completely - not even close - but you appreciate the gesture regardless.

In the warm night air, your thighs coated in the mess of your release and your ass throbbing will a dull ache that was going nowhere any time soon, you focus on the interesting sounds which roll through Cooper's chest as you press your ear against his frayed shirt and allow fatigue to finally claim you.

[bunny584]

For I Have Sinned ୨୧ Chapter II

“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.” Songs of Solomon 8:6-7.

As newly appointed Duchess-To-Be, you have much to learn. Etiquette, conduct and eventual motherhood are the pillars you are expected to live by. Because who cares about your choosing?

The Chapel, tended to by a mercurial Priest, is the perfect refuge.

…right?

Pairing: Geto x female reader

A/N: The is dedicated to the artist ( @captainsalsaa ) I mean look at our fallen Angel. His tears. His frustration. Dear GOD.

To the artist: I stared at your piece, then heard a specific song on my writing playlist then wrote the entire last scene in one sitting. To date, it’s my favorite scene in my author’s portfolio. I hope I did our fallen Angel justice. Thank you for creating this 🤍

Previous | Next

CHAPTER II: Hello, Father.

“Awake early, little dove.” 

Warm hands caress your shoulders. A welcome contrast to the chilly nautical dawn. The sun still has a ways to go, but songbirds have begun their wake up call. 

“As are you, Arella.” 

Your eyes float to your favorite maiden standing above you. No more than a handful of years older, but with a heart for you as if she raised you from birth. 

“It’s my duty to tend to you, is it not?” 

Soft laughter harmonizes with the nightingales. A quick kiss on your forehead before her warmth disappears off the balcony —  undoubtedly to go retrieve a treat of some kind. 

She’s not wrong. 

Technically it is her duty. 

But Arella is your blessing. 

Matting and kneading your surroundings to fit your needs. Eager to dampen the growing pains of settling in a new home. 

Constant hellos. 

Permanent smiles.

Not too wide, like a promiscuous woman. But not too tight, like a cold prude. 

Rooms to tour. Hands to shake. Garments to pin and tie and lace around your lungs as if your God-given ribcage was a frivolous extra not needed for life. Not needed to breathe. 

Breathe.

Your lids screw shut. Pulling in as much of the balmy, saltwater breeze gliding up the steep rock face along the overhang. 

Much like he did. 

The Chaplain. 

His hair cascading down his back in the same way poets monologue when inspired. His eyes a mural of what the Gods paint when they want to show off. 

The way earth acquiesces to his touch as if he is the Creator. The birds choose to perform for him every morning. And the ocean exists to bathe him. 

You cannot decide if the sorbet sunsets are created by the Chaplain. Or if the Gods fight over who gets the honor of painting him a new one each evening. 

“Sleep still escapes you, precious girl.” 

It does, but not for the reason she thinks. 

“You worry too much, Arella. I’ll adjust soon.” The tea she brought you is delicious.

The both of you cross back into your quarters. The stagnant, perfumed air suddenly suffocating.

“I would like to go to the chapel garden.” 

A quiet declaration that stills your handmaiden in her tracks. Then a small grin blossoms on her beautiful face. Fussing with your bedding. Wiping away evidence of your sleepless night. 

“For the flowers that bloom, little dove? Or for the God that tends to them?”

The blood in your veins runs subzero. 

“Arella! I am engaged to be marri—“

“Of course you are. But eyesight isn’t a sin.”

Another moment of feigned irritation before you burst into a fit of childish giggles. The both of you no better than school girls, covering your mouths, stifling your laughter. 

“I just wanted to see you smile.” Arella gestures to your extravagant dresser across the room. 

“In the second drawer you can find a casual garment. Come back with at least one hour to prepare for Mass.”

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

A hummingbird chaperones your walk to the church estate. Dulcet hums drown out the rattling heartbeat between your ears. 

This is harmless.

It is not a sin to take in Earth’s natural candy. To appreciate God’s gift to humanity.

In all of his majestic glory. 

Your eyes dart around as if your thoughts are a tangible scroll. Written in ink for the world to see.

Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no one around. 

Just you. Your fluttering companions (both heart and bird). The waking sun. God above and his plants swaying in the gentle gusts of wind. You’re safe in your mind. 

Until he decimates all logical and reasonable train of thought, that is. 

You should be angry. Infuriated. That no one adequately prepared you for seeing the demigod for the first time. Even now, you question whether he’s flesh and blood. 

Maybe an illusion? 

The Lord playing tricks from his throne? 

The mirage before you halts your paces. You can’t help but question your level consciousness. 

Because this must be a dream. 

“Oh, don’t be cruel.” 

Words slip out of your mouth, currently ajar. It’s not your place to chastise the One above, but come on. 

Your eyes taste the Chaplain for a second time and this course is even more decadent than the first. 

There he stands. 

A raven waterfall down his broad, muscular back. Half of it tied away from his face. Olive skin so rich the surrounding plants pale in comparison. Russet brown working pants hang loose around his tapered waist, but snug around his thighs. Various tools hooked in the belt loops. Heavy mahogany work boots match the worn leather gardening gloves fitted to his hands. 

His hands. 

Reaching for thorny vines plaguing his hydrangeas. Even at your distance you could detail each muscle fiber in his arm tense and release with every pull and toss.

Pull and toss.

Pull and toss. 

You would have gotten lost in his rhythmic trance, if it weren’t for the symbol branded in charcoal sprawling his back. The emblem peeks through his thick hair, every now and again. 

A spear? 

No.

A trident. With waves snaking up its stalk along his spine. 

His gravitational pull is overwhelming. Your feet move with more stealth than the King’s Guard.

“Working on the Day of Rest, Father?” Casual, measured. 

“Duchess,” Saliva pools in your mouth. His smile teases your ears before he graces you with it. 

“I have to start being more careful about my clothing.” A playful glint in his eyes. 

“Especially now that I’ve been blessed with a fellow greenskeeper.” 

He is a man of God.

And would never insinuate anything impure. 

But that doesn’t stop your cunt from clenching around his words steeped in a baritone potent enough to rumble the ground beneath you.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve sent word that I was coming.” 

“This palace belongs to you, Duchess. You are welcome here at any hour.” His hand captures a vine and tosses it into the pile without his eyes ever leaving yours. 

You are weak.

And greedy. 

The way your gaze drops to his arm. Desperately etching its contours into memory. Seconds, maybe minutes pass before you realize you were gawking. And the Chaplain just let you. 

Head cocked to the side. Soft smile ghosting his full lips. 

“Would you like to finish the tour of your new playground?” 

“Y-yes. Of course, please.” Stumbling over the uneven cobblestone in your voice, you turn away to begin the coordinated stroll. The Priest slides his arms into a linen button up. Lazily fastening two center buttons only. 

He informs you of the work that has already been done, what’s left. Where the soil is richest, where it is the most acidic. How the sun hits certain flowers at each hour of the day.

Brilliant. 

With complete command over God’s bouquet. The sun following him wherever he steps.

“Did you enjoy your swim today, Father?” Both you and the Priest come to a slow stop. One of his angular eyebrows raised.

“I’m dry, Duchess.” He responds with a low, hypnotic chuckle. 

Heat floods your cheeks. How could you be so presumptuous?

“What gave me away?” 

Your knees nearly betray you. The razor sharp grin on his face could cut glass. 

“You were born for the ocean. Or rather, the ocean was born for you.”

Your statement is greeted with blaring silence. 

Lava in his gaze. Singeing every part of your face it touches. His expression is like a foreign language. 

“I—I’ve overstepped, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend. Clearly I have much to learn about social graces.” A meek apology bubbles out of your lips. Desperate to fill the space between your bodies. 

The mercurial man shakes his head slightly. Thawed out from your statement, he reaches over and plucks a stray lilac petal resting on your crown.

“My father used to say the same.” He muses, looking away for the first time. 

“Your father! Is he—“

“He was called home some time ago.” This smile is soft. Reminiscent. Polite, but his mind clearly elsewhere. 

“Oh Father Geto, I’m so sorry.” 

A foot in your mouth is not enough punishment for your indecency. Why would you go prodding like this?

“Don’t be, I’ll see him again. Soon enough.”

“Not too soon, I hope.” The statement draws a stunned gaze from the Chaplain. Eyes dancing between yours. 

“Time to prepare for mass, little dove!” Arella’s melodic call tethers you back down from outer space. 

You flicker over to her with a ruby dusting over your nose and cheeks. Like a child caught with her hand in a cookie jar before supper. 

“Happy Sunday, Father!” Arella calls out, cheshire grin on her face deepening your crude blush. 

“Indeed, Arella.” He returns the greeting while keeping his eyes on you. 

“Send my regards to the Duke.” His voice lowers, for your ears only. With a nearly imperceptible edge to his tone. 

“Happy Sunday, Duchess. We have a counseling session scheduled late afternoon, yes?” 

A statement of pure black and white fact. And yet it travels down your spine and settles between your legs. Wet heat dampening your thin negligee.

“Yes, Father. Happy Sunday.”

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

Mass was miserable. 

Your corset laced tight enough to meld your two lungs and beating heart into one entity. To say the neckline strangled you is putting it mildly. Cold, uninviting pews dug into your skin at every turn. 

Wretched. 

But the worst of it wasn’t the thin, oxygen-deficient air. Or the shards of glass that slid down your throat with every swallow. Even the jaw pain from tensing your lips in a well-mannered smile for two hours straight was tolerable. 

The worst part of it was him. 

The Priest mesmerized an entire congregation to an ear-splitting hush. 

His first Sunday mass since appointment and nearly everyone in the country and every surrounding province stuffed into the chapel. 

So desperate for blessings from Father Geto. 

Could you blame them?

His voice danced in and out of the pews listlessly. 

Soothing fussy children. Adolescent girls and their mother’s alike — utterly smitten. Adolescent boys experienced their first “I want to be like him” with their fathers sitting right next to them. Husbands glanced feverishly at the women in their lives. 

He had to have noticed it. And yet, he floated above it all the entire service.

Above you. 

Refusing to gift you those eyes that put Vincent Van Gogh to shame. No matter how much you shifted in your seat and straightened your spine.

The Priest spoke to everyone in the room but you. 

Did you read him wrong? 

Did you misinterpret your budding friendship? 

Does it…should it even matter?

Your irritation is palpable. Innocent bystanders are caught in your friendly fire. Including Arella, who changed you out of that horrid costume. And sweet Noel, who ushered you into the seating area — just outside of the good Father’s office.

You make a mental note to send treats to the tender-hearted alter boy. And to apologize profusely to your handmaiden. 

“You are a million miles away, darling.” The sound of your betrothed tows you out of the storm clouds. 

You flicker over to the Duke. Emerald green eyes, high cheek bones — handsome in a way that is characteristic of everyone native to your new home.

“I’m right here, Ezra.” 

“Are you, sweetheart?” The back of his hand caresses your cheek. 

“Mmhm.” You offer your future husband a weak smile and kiss on his cheek. His eyes  faltering slightly, undoubtedly hopeful for lips instead. 

“Good afternoon, Duke and Duchess Ahriman.” 

Father Geto’s velvet greeting encases you both. If Ezra’s arm didn’t guide you to stand you would have been paralyzed in your seat. 

“Father Geto, a pleasure. Thank you for seeing us.” Ezra offers a genuine smile and handshake. Buying you a few extra seconds in your mind’s safe haven.

The Chaplain is tight lipped. Professional. He returns the handshake firmly. 

“Pleasure is mine.” 

Ezra shifts slightly on his feet. Straightening his spine and dropping his shoulders. Your eyes bounce between the Chaplain and your fiancé.

“I must say, Father. You are even more handsome up close. I speak for the men in this country, thank you for taking the vow of celibacy!” The words spill out of the Duke. Unknowingly thinning the air. 

The Priest chuckles quietly, dropping his eyes briefly before landing them on you. And it feels like you could double over.  Your core temperature skyrockets under his smoldering gaze. 

He, the archer. You, the bullseye. 

“Let’s get started, shall we?” 

Ezra laces his fingers in yours, taking the two seats directly in front of the oak desk. A leather bound notebook and pheasant feather pen are neatly arranged — with your names on the first page.

Blue flame rises from your toes to hairline. You might as well have been sitting naked. With how exposed, how vulnerable you feel already.

“What will we be covering first, Father? Something about how wives should obey their husbands, right?” Ezra is light-hearted. Meant to be said in jest.

But he finds himself being the only party in the room laughing. 

The Priest rolls the ink pen between his fingers. Allowing a deafening silence to coat the walls. His expression is neutral, but eyes ablaze. 

“If the man in question is worthy of submission.” He starts. A low, ominous rumble. 

“Uh, yes. Of course.” Ezra responds, shifting in his seat. 

But the Chaplain does not stop. Intent on making a point, he leans in. Pen whirling lightning fast between his long, deft fingers. Enough tailwind to launch across the room, if he desired.  

“If the man in question would give his life for his wife.” Volcanic eyes linger on you, then back to your fiancé. Ezra’s palm finds your thigh. You gnaw on your inner cheek to avoid flinching away. 

“If he would love her like Christ loves all of his creations unconditionally. Unselfishly. Irrationally.” 

“Yes, Father. I understand.” 

“Only then, should she submit.” His serrated tone could split chromium with ease. 

“Of course, of course.” Ezra wisely accepts defeat. 

He presses a short kiss on your cheek as an apology that you didn’t ask for, nor do you want. 

“Mmm.” A forced acknowledgment of the Duke’s affection through your pinched lips. Barely able to move under the Father’s microscopic gaze. 

“Now then,” Father Geto clears the boulders in his throat. 

“Tell me about your love.” 

The question stuns both you and the Duke. Looking to each other sheepishly because neither of you chose this.

War is young men dying and old men talking. And your life path is no different. Dictated by conversations between the powers that be. 

“We’ve only met a week ago, Father.” Your honesty drives both of his eyebrows upward. 

“A week ago?”

“But we are hoping you can teach us.” The Duke, overeager and excitable. 

“Teach you…?” Father Geto muses. You can’t quite interpret his tone, or minimal response. But your heart flutters all the same. 

He is thinking something. And what you would give to get a glance. To be let in. 

“Perhaps guide us?” Ezra gives an unintentionally painful squeeze on your thigh. You fail to muffle the tiny whimper. 

The Priest’s eyes laser down to where your fiancé’s hand lays. Chest rising and falling dangerously slow. 

“Right.”

Your eyes trail upwards as he stands. Closer to God than to you from this point of view.

“Duke, Duchess. You’ll have to accept my sincerest apologies.” 

His fingers dip the unused pen back into the ink cup. The edges of his leather bound notebook coming together. Seemingly without any notes, but an entire script from this session swirling in his mind. 

“My schedule is incorrect. I have another commitment. We will reschedule, yes?” Said with a finality that sends chills crawling down your spine. 

The two of you stand. Another handshake between the men. A restrained nod for you.

Just as quickly as you were let in, Father Geto shuts you out of his office and his mind. 

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

Suguru presses his forehead against the shower tile. Warm water raining down his loose mane. Soothing his sore, overworked limbs. 

Today was maddening. 

He nearly destroyed his vestment the minute that God-forsaken counseling session ended. Seeking refuge, he took to the coast. 

And the sea provided anything but peace. 

She was angry with him, tonight. 

Curt. With unpredictable currents. Rip tides at nearly every turn. She tested his adaptation without mercy.

Just like that night.

“I’m going to stay on board, brother!”

Suguru flickered over to the silver-haired deckhand. An unfamiliar reservation opacifying his nearly translucent, iridescent eyes. 

Brother in name, technically. 

Their bloodlines were oil and water. He was a high born. Suguru was born unworthy of a beggar’s pity. 

But, bloodlines were inconsequential when their souls were instep as one. Both handed to humanity on the same night. During a thunderstorm already inscribed in history books.

‘The Tide of Eternal Requiem.’ 

It brought complete devastation. Crops destroyed. Families torn apart by tragic accidents inland and at sea. 

Then fate struck. 

Within the same hour, a voltaic boy, with a halo that put the clouds to shame and diamond eyes that could draw truth from murderers was born into the loving embrace of his parents. 

And Suguru was born with a crown so dark that the raging midnight appeared bright. 

With eyes as ominous as the sky above. 

Gunmetal grey, accented by an eerie violet swarm. Dormant volcanoes, threatening eruption. His birth mother abandoned him in an alley. Driven by fear that he was a bad omen from the Gods. 

“Ahhh, Satoru come on. Since when do you shy away from a few waves?”

Suguru teased. Already well into the process of shedding his work gear. 

“Zeus is the one rumored to be my father.” His counterpart flashed a knowing smile. 

“Poseidon doesn’t watch over me like he does you, Suguru.”

A tsunami couldn’t keep Suguru from his home. Much less a little rain. 

They were 3 miles away from the shoreline. Using his God-given ability, Suguru regularly acted as their scout. Performing his own reconnaissance then alerting the incoming ship of safe or turbulent terrain. 

“Almost ready to go, son?” 

His chosen father came up behind him. Suguru knew there were tears lining his meek eyes before turning to face him. 

“Dad.” Suguru sighed, fully disrobed now. Just his muscular frame and a compression suit. 

He met his father’s concerned gaze. Always like this during sea storms. Quiet prayers written all over his gentle features. 

Despite the worry, he never once attempted to convince his oceanic boy to stay on board. It would have been too cruel.

“I’ll be fine, I’ve traversed angrier swells.”

“Suguru, take care of yourself when I’m gone.” 

Elder, worn hands landed on his shoulders. Nearly too high for his reach. Suguru cocked his head to the side. 

This goodbye was different. 

“Stay on this path. For me. Albeit straight and narrow, there is a wonderful view. This is all for you, son.” 

Both men glanced to the Persian gulf. She thrashed against their vessel. Swaying their catch left and right with the intention of taking her creatures back. 

“Where is this coming from?” A genuine question from his younger self. Unable to read between the lines. 

“Can’t a man just speak from the heart?”

The melancholy smile didn’t meet the wrinkles of time decorating his eyes, but they shared a laugh anyway.  Suguru turned away but was promptly drawn back. 

“My beautiful boy.” 

The fisherman cradled his son’s face. Swimming in the eyes that Suguru once hated. The eyes that convinced his birth mother to abandon him. 

“Make it to shore, son.” Suguru rested his head against his father’s neck. Taking a slow, sweet drag of his scent.

Oak. 

He always smelled like oak. It was one of Suguru’s favorite things about him.

“If Poseidon calls—“

“I’ll tell him to fuck off.” Mischievous grin plastered on Suguru’s face. His father planted a kiss on his cheek, pushing him towards the end of the boat. As he always did.

Then the Gulf wrapped him in her hostile embrace. 

She was irate. 

Vicious tidal waves. Rapidly shifting currents. Even her creatures knew to settle below their usual depth. Suguru cursed the fact that he was born with useless, human lungs. Unable to withstand the pressure of the Midnight Zone. 

Within minutes his long, lean frame was riding her whims without a shred of control. Tossed around like a rag doll. At her complete mercy — or lack thereof. 

This was the first time he struggled to tame his element. A muffled groan bubbled around him. Serrated edges of long coral stalks dug into his back. Stark white foam whirled around him. 

Aerated waters. 

Suguru could barely maneuver against the waves pummeling his core. Searing heat traveling up his spine. His lungs demanded oxygen. 

The boat. 

The boat would never make it to shore. 

Desperate, furious strokes of his arms meant nothing against her unrelenting grasp. Effectively pinning Suguru to his underwater cross. 

A piece of chewed plank wood whizzed by his face. 

Followed by another. 

Then another. 

And Suguru watched his nightmare materialize before his eyes. Mustering his last oxygen reserve, he bellowed against his closed lips.

As if she hadn’t already ignored the cries of his fellow fisherman. 

Even still, he screamed so loud his ribcage should have vaporized. But ushering him to a watery grave at that time would have been too merciful. 

Suguru blinks out of the harrowing memory. The steeping tea takes at least two layers of epithelium off his esophagus.

Fucking, hell. 

He can’t seem to escape pain today.

The swim was excruciating.

Mass was dreadful.

Watching that boy’s hand lay on your lap was grating. 

Suguru’s mind drifts back to you. Your thought washes over him like baptizing waters purifying that which is impure.

The gleam in your eyes when you asked about his morning plunge. Barely a week and your pulse on him is already this precise.

Do not covet, Suguru. 

He scoffs to himself. Shaking free of your tempting spiral. 

This ‘straight and narrow’ path is proving to be more challenging than he let on. 

“Would you be proud, Father?” 

A whisper of accusation at the end of his inquiry. Suguru would give his arms, his eyes…his life to hear his father’s voice on the other end of his questions, once again. 

“Did He tell you?” 

Roaring silence. Of course. He knows that. He expects it. 

But it angers him all the same. 

“Did He come to you in a dream??” Suguru echos louder. More frantic. Punched out in a way he can barely recognize. 

“Was the reaper at His left, my heart on the right?!” A weak sob slips through the crack in his baritone. 

Yet another pain. But this one is tart and blurring his vision. 

“Did you KNOW? D—did you know that day was your last?!” He hisses through a salty stream.  Storming out to the garden to escape the walls collapsing in on him. 

Suguru’s eyes laser to the remaining thorny vines along his bed of hydrangeas. Without a second thought he wraps them around his bare arms. Staining the plant and his freshly bathed skin with crystalline tears. Once its thorns sufficiently bury into his skin he rips it away from the soil with all his might. 

“Bastard. I’m your SON.”

Warm metallic drips down the hills and ridges of his arms. Collecting in the flower bed. 

Is he cursing his earthly father? 

His Heavenly One? 

Or the Deity that brought this grief on him in the first place?

It hurts. 

An unforgiving pain. 

Much like the thorns in those rapids. Much like the inconceivable burn from his lungs begging for expanse. The time limit, even for him, ran lethally low. 

Well exceeding his father’s time limit. 

Poseidon stole from him that day.  

A callous trade for Suguru’s continued existence. 

“Why didn’t you…I—I should’ve been there.” 

Guilt eviscerates Suguru’s remaining resolve. Tilting his head up, he lets the salty crystals rain down his cheeks freely. 

The full moon cradles his face with the same warmth, the same adoration his father’s hands used to. 

Suguru accepts its celestial kisses for a moment before burying his face into his bloodied palms. His damp locks curtain his flushed face. Protecting the world from his unruly sobs.

“I’m here.” Barely audible words escape through desperate grabs for air. 

“I made it to shore, Dad.”

E/N: Oh hello, don’t mind me just sobbing. Also, guest appearance by our glorious Blue Eyed Babygirl King™️ If you need me, I will be in witness protection before Gege finds this since it’s a crime to be a S*toru lover. 

taglist: @blkkizzat @rotteneyess

[skzdust]

Chan's Throne

Kinktober Day 31: Free space

This is smut. MINORS DNI.

So I've done Kinktober very sporadically... but this is my fic for the free space day! Chan on a throne... ugh this picture had me so inspired. Huge thank you to @palindrome969 for the "king Chan" comment too hehehe, and for beta reading. Enjoy!

Summary: King Chan fucks you on his throne.

Pairing: King! Bang Chan x afab reader

Includes: riding, oral (m recieving), Minho appearance, "baby", "good girl"

Word count: 800

Taglist (Comment on a post/send an ask if you'd like to be added): @weirdowithaphone, @caught-in-the-afterglow, @palindrome969, @skzstan12345, @katsukis1wife,

@hyunjinsjeans, @somethingkindazainy, @silverstarburst

Network:@mirohs-aurora-society

Reblogs, likes, comments all appreciated!!!

Masterlist

-----

“Mm, yeah.” Chan sighed. “That’s it, baby.”

You closed your eyes, focusing on his cock, heavy on your tongue as you leaned against the bottom of his throne. You sucked on the head a little, and he moaned. “God, baby, so good.”

“Your Highness?” You breathed, pulling back a little and opening your eyes.

His hand gently ran through your hair. “Yeah?”

You leaned into the touch. “I wanna ride you.”

“Ride me?” Chan lifted his eyebrows. “On my throne?”

You nodded. “Yes.”

“Fuck.” He mumbled, his hand tugging gently on your hair. “Say please?”

You whined. “Please.”

He smiled. “You always beg so pretty. Yes, you can ride me, hard.”

“Thank you, your highness.” You lifted up your skirt, which Chan had specifically requested you not wear anything underneath, and climbed onto his lap, facing him.

His hand found its way behind your neck, his fingers rubbing little circles into your scalp. You closed your eyes, and he pulled your mouth to his.

The kiss was deep, and Chan quickly made it fiery, biting at your bottom lip with rough teeth. You opened your mouth to moan, and his tongue quickly found its way in, pushing at yours, pushing you.

At the same time, he reached under your skirt, running his hands along your thighs as you shuddered and whined before he pushed two fingers inside of you. You sighed, the penetration felt good, but you needed more.

You needed him.

He interpreted that sigh correctly, and pulled back with a low laugh. “Does my baby want my cock in that wet little hole?”

You nodded, putting on big eyes and biting your lip just a little bit. You didn’t want to overdo it. “Yes, your highness.”

“Good,” He murmured. “Good.” He took his fingers out, wiping them on your thigh, before resting both of his hands casually on the arms of the throne. “I told you you could ride me, I want to see you get to work.”

You swallowed, your whole body on fire. “Yes, your highness.”

You lined yourself up with him, and after a few tries, his unfairly large cock slid into you. It felt like it might push into your lungs as you seated yourself properly on his lap. You braced your hands on his shoulders and began to bounce up and down, fucking yourself on him, pushing the air out of you with every thrust.

“Perfect.” He mumbled. That, the slight blush on his cheeks, and the way his eyes hungrily surveyed your body were the only signs he was affected by your actions.

And that just made it hotter. It felt so dirty to be fucking on the throne, Chan’s throne, the seat from which he ruled the kingdom. Hell, it was still within his work day, this had just been the most convenient place to sneak away to after his meeting.

There was a loud knock, and you looked over your shoulder, your breath catching in your throat as the large door to the throne room swung open.

Chan grabbed your chin and pulled it towards him, although his eyes were on the door. “Eyes on me, baby.” Louder, he said, “Minho! What brings you in?”

Minho, Chan’s top advisor on matters of foreign relations, probably wouldn’t interrupt if it wasn’t important. You stopped moving and tried to look back again, but Chan’s grip on your chin tightened. “I didn’t say to stop.”

You slowly began to rock back and forth on his cock again as Minho started to explain something about another nation and a trade pact they were proposing.

“One moment, Minho.” Chan interrupted him. He pulled your head close to his, growling in your ear. “I said hard.”

You whined involuntarily and obeyed his order, going faster.

“Apologies, please go on.”

Minho kept going, and you kept going, the whole time drawing closer and closer to orgasm. “Please, your highness, Chan, can I cum?”

“No.” He said dismissively. “Go on, Minho.”

“I can come back later.” Minho said awkwardly.

“No. I want you to watch her lose it.”

You could hear the smirk in Minho’s voice. “I’m not about to complain at that offer.”

Chan muttered in your ear, “Would you like that, baby? For Minho to watch you edge yourself on my cock?”

You nodded, the thought almost enough to send you over the edge.

Almost.

You stopped moving right as you reached the edge of your climax.

“Good girl.” Chan praised. “Minho, tell her she’s a good girl.”

You heard Minho take a step on the polished floor. “Can I—”

“Go ahead.”

Minho gently pulled your face to look at him. You were teary from the lost orgasm, your face red and slightly sweaty.

“Beautiful.” Minho said, then looked to Chan. “Yeah, she’s a good girl. Let her cum this time.”

Chan smiled. “We’ll see.” He looked back at you. “Again, I didn’t say you could stop.”

[toppersbitch]

sebastian sallowxF!reader with the prompt ❛ keep it. it looks better on you. ❜

Keep It, It's Yours // Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Characters are not aged up here, there is nothing 18+

Summary: Sebastian just loves the way green looks on you!

Word Count: 1k

Warnings: none this is just fluff

Prompt: “Keep it. it looks better on you.”

-----------------------------

You lay on the lawn just near the lake on the Hogwarts grounds, watching the clouds hurry by. Sebastian was dead asleep, his body resting just beside yours. It was a warm day, the last day before summer break began. You would go back home and so would Seb, far away from each other. It was heartbreaking; the two of you had been close since you started in year 5, and now it was the end of year 6. Your teachers despised the two of you, you got in double the trouble. No real feelings had ever been spoken between the two of you, little touches of the hand and knee, words were spoken during late nights and in hidden tunnels. 

“Seb,” you said lightly, pushing your shoulder up against his. He opened his eyes, turning his head to make eye contact, “I think we should jump in the lake,”

“But it is forbidden,” he was mocking one of your teachers, he rolled over onto his side, and you did the same. 

“Who told you that?” no teacher had ever said that and unless it was told to him before year 5, you’d never heard it.

“I don’t know,” he rubbed his eyes with his hand. You smiled, Sebastian always assumed everything at the school was off-limits, that's what it seemed like to him. 

You sat up, untying your boots and setting them to the side, evening was approaching. The sun has almost gone behind the outline of the castle. Seb sat up groggily, following your steps. You had already packed your robes into your trunk, your clothes being strictly casual since then. Why not jump in your clothes? It was shower day anyways. Seb stood up, waiting for you, his hand outstretched. His foot tapped impatiently, mocking you as you placed your hair up. 

Grabbing his hand you hoisted yourself up, holding tight and running towards the lake. You waded in quickly, pulling Seb behind you. The mud squished between your toes, moss, and lake vines snaking up your body.

“I sure hope the squid doesn’t get us,” Seb pinched at your legs, and you squealed, kicking at his hands. You splashed each other, the water feeling refreshing over your sunbaked skin. Laughing at little jokes and such. He lifted you throwing you deeper into the lake, swimming with ease out to you. You held onto each other, the sadness of this week's end events. 

“Seb,” you pulled his eyes from the ducks her was watching, “ I hate summer.”

“Why on earth would you hate summer?’ his eyes carried nothing but confusion.

“I hate not being with you,” you felt your heart grow heavy, “it's so boring.”

“Floo powder is a thing you know,” he had a sarcastic tone, his house fireplace wasn’t connected to the network and neither was yours. 

“Seb you know what I mean,” you rolled your eyes at him. 

“Yeah I know,” you both trailed off, looking around. Night had fallen fast and it had grown surprisingly cold. Your body shivered, teeth chattering involuntarily. However, you stayed, anytime with Sebastian was worth it's total in gold. The bell rang, meaning it was time for dinner, no matter if you two actually made it, Sebastian had an in with the house elves and they’d do just about anything he asked.

“Let’s go back,” you said, your voice quivering from the cold. You swam back, every motion sending chills. The outside air wasn’t much warmer, the air consuming your body. You shivered, tying your shoes and waiting.

“Here take my sweater,” Sebastian offered his knit sweater had been wearing all day. You pulled it over your head, the smell of Seb filling your lungs. 

“Why don’t you wear green more?” Sebastian was staring at you, his robes hanging over his shoulder like a used bath towel. 

You were a Slytherin of course, but you opted for the least amount of green in all your clothing, black fabrics being the majority in your closet. You shrugged, in response beginning the walk back to the castle. 

You both skipped dinner,  opting to take showers and sneak out again later for a snack, possibly in the restricted basement of the library, this was a favorite meeting spot for the two of you. You dressed, pulling over Sebastionas sweater again. It was possibly the coziest thing you’d ever put on, the Slytherin rooms were known for being cold, the walls being all stones. 

“I got us lamb chops and eclairs,” Sebastian sat roughly on the floor, a bag of food falling into your lap. You emptied out the contents, chowing down. The conversation flowed effortlessly, jokes and laughs, even snorts echoed off the cement walls. It was late, even the ghosts were quiet and you no longer had to occasionally hide from them. 

“I don’t wanna go home,” you said, your head resting on Sebastian’s shoulder, his on top of yours. You twirled your wand in your hand, watching little sparks fly with just your thoughts. 

“Either do I, but we have to,” his words were tired and slurred, he was half asleep and you knew it. You stood up, pushing your mess back into the bag, and helping Sebastian stand, you both stood facing each other, tears welling in your eyes. There was no promise you would be able to say goodbye tomorrow. You wiped your eyes on the sleeves, the green fabric soaking the up. 

“Oh here's your sweater,” you pulled it over your head, wadding it up and stuffing it into Sebastian’s hands, he grabbed it tightly, letting his hands graze yours. He pulled you into a tight hug, beginning to sniffle himself. 

The next morning was hard, shoving the rest of your belonging into your trunk, and finding places for the trinkets you collected this year. Moving onto your desk you saw a specific green sweater folded neatly, a note pinned to it. You hurried over grabbing the note eagerly. 

It read: “Keep it. It looks better on you anyways” signed Seb

His sloppy handwriting is barely legible. How on earth did he sneak this in here before leaving? He was such a mysterious being.

You folded the note, slipping it into your journal, holding the sweater to your chest. Seb had already gone home, and this was all you had of him for the summer, other than the letters of course.

-----------------------------

God this is so cute!!!!!! I hope this everyone enjoys <3333

Find my other stuff HERE

[darlingdaisyfarm]

soooo I saw this absolutely adorable art of Stan Pines kissing someone's hand and I loved it so much, I just had to write something about it! hope you’ll like it ♡

Stan’s hand clasps yours, rough and warm, and it makes your pulse quickens at his touch. His grip is firm but careful, like he knows exactly how much pressure to use. He’s not the type to hold back, but there’s something so gentle and delicate about the way he lifts your hand toward his lips. 

You hold your breath, eyes wide, watching in stunned silence. And then, without a word, he presses a soft kiss to your knuckles.

Stan Pines just kissed your hand. 

You blink, heart practically jumping out of your chest, and it takes all your willpower not to squeak out loud. Did Stan Pines, the gruffest, toughest, most no-nonsense man you’ve ever met, just kiss your hand like some old-timey gentleman? What even is happening right now?

“Stan. . .” you manage to breathe out quietly. Inside, though, you’re screaming. You’re torn between laughing nervously and collapsing into a puddle of blushes and giggles at the unexpectedly tender gesture. “What— uh, what’re you doing?”

His eyes flicker up to yours for a second, and you swear there’s a little smirk on his face. He knows, he knows what he’s doing to you. “What? a guy can’t be a little smooth every now and then?” Stan’s just standing there like it’s the most casual thing in the world, like he hasn’t just flipped your entire reality upside down.

You’re frozen, staring at him, your heart pounding in your chest like you’ve just run a marathon, when all you did was stand there while this damn man stole every ounce of composure you’ve ever had with a single kiss to your hand. But he’s still holding your hand, his lips pressed to your knuckles. What the hell are you supposed to do? You’re so lost in your own thoughts. 

Oh god, he kissed your hand. Stanley Pines just kissed your damn hand. You try to say something, anything, but all that comes out is a nervous, shaky laugh.

“What’s the matter, sugar? cat got your tongue?” Stan raises a brow, lips quirking in that smirk he always gets when he knows he’s got the upper hand. He’s still holding you, still brushing his thumb over your knuckles like it’s no big deal, like this isn’t the most intimate thing he’s ever done. And you’re melting. 

“You— you kissed my hand,” your voice trembling and you swear you see his smirk grow just a little wider.

“Yeah, so? It’s called bein’ a gentleman. You kids these days don’t know nothin’ ‘bout that,” he teases, acting all casual, like he didn’t just knock the air right out of your lungs. Actually he’s enjoying this, he’s definitely enjoying watching you lose your mind over something so simple.

“You’re unbelievable,” you murmur, still feeling the heat on your cheeks, your shocked gaze runs over his face.

Stan chuckles softly, finally letting your hand go but leaning in just a bit, his voice dropping to a lower, more serious tone. “Yeah, well, guess I’m just full of surprises, huh?” he pauses. “but between you and me, sweetie, you make it pretty easy to be a gentleman.”

Your breath catches, your stomach doing somersaults. Did he just—? 

Before you can respond, he straightens up, giving you one last wink. “Don’t let it go to your head. See ya around, sweetheart.”

[lokisgoodgirl]

A Long Shower [Loki x Fem.Reader]

A link to my Masterlist is HERE Summary: You become an unwitting voyeur to Loki's post-workout routine. (w/c 2.2k) Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI. Voyeurism. Awkwardness. Thirst. Smuttish. M*sturbation. Language.

Shit shit shit shit shit You hurriedly crouched behind the row of lockers, hunched and contorted to an inch of your life. If you were honest, you didn’t think you were going to fit. And right now, you sort of wished you hadn’t. The air you’d sucked in felt like granite, holding your breath as Loki Laufeyson padded obliviously over the heated tiles.

Why am I such an awkward arsehole, you thought; lungs starting to burn. Can’t just say hello, excuse me; like a normal person. Need to hide behind the feckin’ lockers, Jesus.

The unmistakeable sound of his sultry singing had wafted down the hall like a hymn. 'Der ligger hun i sjøen, min elsker, Jeg hører henne rope når månen er høy' He was so absent-mindedly perfect, in every way. Fuck. You’d only come in to grab forgotten headphones, there was nothing untoward. And yet, when you’d heard his hypnotic gravelled voice– you had panicked. And now, it was too late. 'Hun kjenner ikke ledningene hun holder... som binder hennes hjerte til mitt' Silence. You opened one eye reluctantly, half expecting to see his magnificent form looming with sceptical disdain. But, no. He was bent on one knee facing the opposite wall, untying his trainers. I didn’t think he’d tie his own shoes, you frowned. That ass, though. Loki was dressed in skin-tight black workout clothes that left just enough to the imagination. And boy, had you imagined. That gym gear of his clung to every carved inch of his body like a second skin. Alongside the way that he growled and grunted through inhuman workouts, it was a miracle you had survived this long in the team. Lord above, the filthy things he had done to you in your head in the dead of night as you touched yourself beneath sweaty sheets. It might even make him blush. You bit your lip, blowing air gently, silently, through your nose. You suddenly felt twenty pounds lighter. The thought had often crossed your mind about just who Loki was behind closed doors. He was charming and polite, a bit extra – kind of an asshole sometimes. And he was always on. There had been a sign hanging in the hallway of your old high school which had read, ‘who you truly are, is the person you become when you think nobody's watching’. You thought about that sign a lot. Your gaze tracked up from Loki’s ankles, over the curve of his bulging thighs tight beneath the shorts; a sheet of damp curls hanging down past his neck. And who are you, Loki Laufeyson? He unfurled, the muscles in his calves hardening as he pushed up. The shoes were kicked aside as he ran his hands casually through that gorgeous hair with a sigh. Oh god, you realised with rising horror. Is he going to… Still facing the wall, Loki began to strip.

The damp lycra top was the first soldier to fall. It peeled away beneath crossed hands which raised achingly slowly above his head. With every inch of skin revealed, you felt the blood drain from your face. I’m going to pass out, you thought, pushing yourself back against the tiled wall and hoping it would absorb you. His broad, triangular torso was inescapable. You should close your eyes. Avert your gaze. Protect his modesty. But oh, god - Loki tugged the training top from his head with a strained grunt, wild hair falling in waves between shifting shoulder-blades. He stretched to the side, freshly pumped forearms bulging with sickening definition. A thin sheen of sweat clung to his iridescent skin. Fuck, how you wanted to lick him. Taste the virgin sweat that was gathered in every dip and valley. In the soft lighting of the changing rooms, every dented curve of his arms were visible, each breathe making the landscape of his back flex as he rolled his head from side to side. He has fucking...back-dimples. You realised you had been holding your breath again. Long fingers began to toy with the waistband of his shorts. Jesus take the wheel, not the shorts. They caught on the curve of his ass, elastic grazing sluttishly down taut skin. You pressed your lips together painfully to stop the whimper building behind your teeth as the shorts fell in a heap around his ankles. I’m fucked, you thought. He’s naked. And I’m fucked. All he had to do was turn around. But he didn’t. Loki took a step to the side, positioning himself with ceremonial purpose in front of a small square mirror. Blessedly, it was too far to the side to reveal your hiding spot. You watched as his brow furrowed, looking deep into his own eyes. If there was one thing more hypnotic than Loki’s body, it was his face. As deep and inscrutable as the galaxies themselves.

He brought a hand across his chest to the opposite shoulder, massaging the dip as he appraised what he saw against some inscrutable criteria. Loki’s endless legs widened, ass clenching. Your stomach had a heartbeat, whirring with unspent adrenaline. Of all the ways you imagined you would first see Loki naked – this was not it. The digits slid to his jaw, thumb and forefinger tipping it to either side as he inspected himself. Is he checking for wrinkles? With mild horror, you realised you couldn’t feel your legs. Loki frowned again, ropes of hard shoulder muscle rolling as he sighed deeply. It was a tired sigh. It made you wonder if a god-level workout was the only thing wearing him out in the morning. He ran a hand through his hair, turning away. Your eyes flew to the wall before firing shut, a primitive freeze response. This was it. The rumble of a shower spurting to life broke the silence, strong pressure from the fancy waterfall head pattering to the tiles below. The showers were to the far right, outside your frame of view. You let out the breath you were holding in staggered, soundless relief. Maybe I can get out while he’s distracted. Crawl out. On my fucking hands and knees like a pervert. You waited a few seconds until the water’s rhythm broke, a contented growl from Loki’s throat that made your pussy hum signalling that his ritual had begun. Like the aforementioned pervert, you craned forwards, peeking around the corner of the lockers. God, how your legs ached. Your eyes widened. Goddammm, Laufeyson.

Loki stood long and lean, water cascading from where the stream hit the back of his neck, all the way down his legs. Even in the shower, his posture was impeccable. He tilted his head back, lips parted as he let the fresh droplets soak his front. The curls you adored from afar had turned to an inky slick, tendrils winding over alabaster skin like an intricate tattoo. There was a quiet beauty about him like this. This was one of his few private moments, an oasis of calm in his otherwise simmering façade. He’s so fucking…beautiful, you pined; realising that your eyeline was dropping unforgivably down his naked body. The rounds of his ass glistened in the soft light, lucky droplets rolling over the curves of muscle which dipped in at the middle of each cheek. He shifted on his feet, the slap of water making you jump as he swivelled his midriff to the side. The baritone hum began again, a hauntingly beautiful melody. From this new angle, every ridge and valley of his abdomen came into view. Fluffs of bubbles ran down his slick skin at a snails pace, each trail lapping over the deep crevices of his adonis belt. Your breath hitched, drawing back behind the lockers so only the tiniest sliver of him was in view. Fat drips of water slid down his legs from hip to calf, relishing each second they spent grasped to his ethereal skin. The undeniable slick in your panties was becoming untenable, becoming an itch that you didn't dare scratch. Heat seeped through the fabric of your leggings as you squashed further back against the wall. Loki raked a hand through the jet mass of hair, shaking a clump as he smoothed it to one side. His eyes were closed, a dark fan of lashes pressed innocently against the delicate skin beneath. I’m going to go into cardiac arrest, you mused, making your peace as he raised one arm to brace against the tiled wall. His profile was in full view now, and for the first time, you caught a glimpse of the legendary cock which haunted your dreams. It rose against his flat stomach, hard and thick and ready to be fucked. Oh god. You swallowed, mouth drier than sand. No. No. No, this is not happening. You shook your head, trying pathetically to wake. The dull ache in your thighs had grown to a roar, muscles screaming to be released from the stress position you’d be holding for what felt like three hours. You felt your parched lips part as the god placed his palm against his obscene manhood, wrapping each straight finger singularly around the shaft with formidable intent. He licked his lips, looking down at it like prey. Like a conquest. The arm locked against the wall, fully outstretched, sliding the foot nearest you backwards a few inches. It squeaked. His bicep tensed as he pressed against the tile, running water continuing its steady beat against his perfect skin. And then, he began to pump. In slow, torturous strokes. Oh god. Loki’s pinky finger hit the sudsy patch of public hair around the base with every journey, squeezing his foreskin out at the tip as it reached the summit. This was not a man in a rush. This was a man with relaxation on his mind. What the actual fuck am I doing here. Your eyes squeezed shut again, slinking back. To be fair, you had more than enough material in the wank-bank to last you the rest of your days. So the next five minutes, then; you thought bitterly, as low moans of pleasure began to sink from the god’s lips. I will not survive this.

The sound mingled with the heavy steam filling the air, a heady scent of bergamot wafting as his erotic sighs and breathy groans reluctantly transcended you to a higher plane. Loki’s moans vibrated, rising and falling. He was shameless. Anyone could walk in, you thought incredulously; before realising the irony.

The god’s hips rocked into each swipe of his hand; fucking rhythmically against his fist as water cascaded over his neck and down chiselled abs. Clumps of soaking hair hung around his cheekbones, layered down his neck, down his shoulders. You hadn’t even realised you were staring at him again, rocking on the balls of your feet as your sweaty fingertips pressed against the floor in a trance. He was intoxicating. The way his brow creased. The way he was sighing gently from glistening lips. Droplets clung to his cheekbones, pacing downward before fainting to the porcelain below. He was completely in the moment, completely lost in himself. Who are you thinking about, Loki? Your heart was thundering, the acid collecting in your burning calves, forgotten. Loki released a ragged groan, taut obliques clenching. The muscles in his femurs tensed, his palm sliding down the wall as his whole body juddered. Long fingers that you fantasised about slipping deep inside you curled against the tiles. Please cum, you hoped ravenously; breaths quickening. Please, for the love of god please cum. “I know you’re there, Agent.” Cold dread rose with each slowly enunciated word, eyes widening as panic expanded like barbed foam in your belly. “Honestly," Loki smarmed, his head falling back with a rasping moan as he released himself with a final squeeze. “How you ever manage to conceal yourself in any undercover operation with all that heavy breathing is beyond me.” With an ungraceful gasp you fell forward, splayed on the heated tiles. Your forehead was pressed to the floor, mind racing as you carded through every possible excuse. None of them were plausible. With difficulty, you turned your cheek to the side to face him. “I’m sorry…” you mumbled, reluctantly pressing up and dusting off your leggings as your cheeks burned hot. “I didn’t mean to-I was just...and then you-” “-Look at me.” he said sternly. Your eyes fluttered up, hoping that the way you were gazing at him was penitent and seductive in equal measure. But he was smiling. Sort of. One side of Loki’s mouth twitched, the pressure from the waterfall shower bouncing outward from between his shoulder-blades as he stared you down. He stood with his hands clasped behind his back. In that standard regally panty-wetting pose that you had admired many times while you raked every inch of his leather-clad body with covetous eyes. You opened your mouth to speak, and closed it again. “I plan on having a very long shower, Agent,” he purred knowingly, the inky curls pasted to his jawline making your stomach flip. He widened his legs, reminiscent of a battle stance. Your eyes fell to his perfect cock twitching neglected against his stomach and then back to his face. The clothes on your body felt heavier with every passing second. “Would you care to join me?” he said politely, as easily as offering you a cup of tea. He already knew the answer. He had known all along. Of course he knew, you mug. Your thighs squeezed together, biting your lip. Loki did the same, before stretching to a wide smile. Mischievous fire simmered in his dilated eyes. There was a click as the lock on the door slid shut of it’s own accord while you pulled your t-shirt over your head.

In the brief cover of darkness, you heard Loki moan again.

Loki's Song (aka nonsense I made up) There she lies in the lake, my lover I hear her call when the moon is high She does not know the cords she holds That bind her heart to mine

Tags (cont in comments) @meowmeow-motherfucker @muddyorbsblr @imalovernotahater @avengersalways @littledark11 @lokikissesmyforehead @simplyholl @fictive-sl0th @thedistractedagglomeration @loveroflokiforpoeticjustice @coldnique @holdmytesseract @jaidenhawke @imalovernotahater @morriggannlostinfandoms @marygoddessofmischief @sebstanwhore @xorpsbane @peacefulpianist @maple-seed @yelkmelk @wheredafandomat @mistress-ofmagic @acidcasualties @ozymdias @peaches1958 @your-taste-on-my-lips @lokidokieokie @kikster606 @peachyjinx @tbhiddlestan83 @trickster-maiden @skymoonandstardust @gruftiela @glitchquake

[thebutchersbitch]

Cooper Adams x Reader

18+ Dom!Cooper Adams x Sub!Fem!Reader • Daddy kink, DDLG, Blood, Rough Sex, Breath Play, Biting, Cooper has a dark side (ofc) he’s tender and sweet but also really fucking insane, Reader is an adult; Cooper is probably ten-twenty years older than reader.

Cooper lifts you off your knees, forcing you to stand. The feeling of your mouth around his cock was fine for awhile, but more than anything, he craves the feeling of your tight little cunt gripping him like his lungs crave air.

You protest with a little whine as he lifts you, worried you’ve done a bad job and displeased him. Cooper knows what you’re thinking-he’s always been able to read you like an open book-and he casually casts aside your worries with a brief “no no baby, y’didnt do anything wrong, promise-,” as he lays your back against the bed. “-Just need to feel your pretty little pussy around me, okay?”

Cooper hovers over you, his large frame shadowing yours, boxing you in like a protective shield. He grabs a pillow from beside you, one of the pink frilly ones that match the whole bedroom set you insisted on having (even though Cooper hated it, he still bought it for you). He tucks the pillow under your head just as you lay down to rest under him, his other hand warm against your thigh, his fingers fanning to caress upward across your hip.

He braces himself against his elbow, leaning close enough so his belly is touching yours, toned in just the right places and soft where he needs to be. His skin is smooth and unbelievably warm; every time Cooper embraces you, especially when you’re both naked, it feels like you’re being swallowed up in the warmest bear hug ever.

The pretty pink sheets are cool beneath you, a contrast to the heat of Cooper’s body covering yours. He guides his hand between you, pumping his cock a few times in his fist as he places its ruddy head at your entrance. “Okay baby,” he murmurs gently, his eyes back on yours. “There’s gonna be a big stretch for a second, but you can do it, okay sweetheart?” You nod, exhaling as Cooper sinks his hips forward slowly, carefully, letting you adjust to him. His eyes fall closed in pleasure, his self control faltering as his carnal instincts are telling him to absolutely brutalize your pussy, to fuck it so hard you’ll be ruined for any other man that puts his dick inside you...

Cooper forces himself to remain calm, to focus on making you feel as good as you’re making him feel right now. His hand rests against the side of your face, gently stroking your hair, his breath uneven as he tells you “so good, baby, you’re doing so good…” Cooper eases himself deeper inside you, a sharp whine leaving your lips and he checks your expression to confirm you’re alright. “Don’t stop,” you plead. “Please don’t stop…” Cooper licks his lips, a little grin turning them upward. “Never planned to,” he groans as he carefully bottoms out inside your pussy.

He isn’t even fucking you yet, not really, just resting inside your cunt, letting your body open up for him. He kisses you tenderly, soft, gentle kisses that grow deeper and stronger, his tongue wrestling yours. You feel his cock pulse inside you, throbbing between your walls, nestled tight in a perfect fit. “Okay baby,” Cooper says against your lips. “Go ahead and wrap your legs around me, yeah? Give my waist a real big hug, alright sweetheart?” You do as Cooper says, wrapping your legs around him, your ankles crossed against his back, pulling him impossibly deeper, somehow. You both let out a low groan at the space he’s filled inside you, space that no other man has ever had the knowledge or experience to find before Cooper. He’s taking his time with you, unlike all the other (younger) men you’ve been with.

“M’gonna fuck you now, okay sweetheart?” Cooper asks, his nose brushing yours. You suddenly feel overwhelmed, so many brand new feelings pounding through you, both physical and emotional, that you begin to cry. Cooper understands; he kisses away the tears that fall scattered down your cheek, and he calmly asks, “what do you need, baby? Tell Daddy what you need…”

You squeeze your legs tighter around Cooper, begging him to thrust, feeling as if you’ll go crazy if he doesn’t start fucking you. “Need you, Daddy,” you whimper, not even caring how pathetic and needy you sound.

Cooper knows you’ve gone to a special place now in your mind, a soft space that feels just a little like dying…a kind of surrender, of giving up all control and thought and logic and just existing for the purpose of being fucked. “It’s okay princess,” he coos softly, pressing gentle kisses to your lips. “You don’t have to think anymore. Just lay back and let Daddy take care of everything from here, alright…?”

Cooper curls his hips inward, the muscles in his stomach tensing against yours. He closes a hand around the back of your neck, cradling you into him, while his other hand grips the thick meat of your thigh, locking you in place while he fucks you.

It isn’t sweet, the way Cooper fucks you, but it isn’t cruel, either. It’s a delicious, delicate balance of tenderness and brutality, held together in harmony by the massive amount of control Cooper holds over both his body and yours. He could as easily crush you beneath him as he could kiss you, and that amount of power goes to Cooper’s head a little, gets him high. He doesn’t want to hurt you-not yet, anyway-but if he did, he knows he could crush you like a flower in his hand, your pretty petals forever warped into whatever shape he breaks them in…

Sweat dots Cooper’s forehead, his eyebrows drawn in as he invades the deepest space inside you. Your bottom lip begins to bleed as the delicate skin breaks under the bite of your teeth. Cooper’s senses perk, like a shark sensing prey, his eyes landing on the drop of blood blooming at your lip, forced to spill down your chin by the impact of his brutal thrusts. He dips his tongue to chase the thin trail of red along the curve of your neck. You shiver at the unexpected feeling of Cooper’s tongue licking up your skin. He purses his lips inside the curve of your shoulder, trapping the runaway blood and sucking, dragging the crimson liquid and your skin between his lips, bruising you.

Cooper is insatiable now that he’s gotten a taste of you; he doesn’t want your flavor to ever leave his tongue. He slides a hand over your throat, pressing just hard enough to feel you gurgle against his palm. “More,” he demands, but it sounds like he’s begging, his eyes filled with a need you haven’t seen from him before. “Do it again, baby,” he pleads, his voice breaking. “Do it for Daddy.”

You don’t understand exactly what Cooper’s asking of you, but regardless, you’ll do anything for him. So when he shows you, by taking your bottom lip between his teeth and nipping at the small wound there, you don’t object. Wincing slightly, you lay back and let Cooper suck at your pouty bottom lip. The pain is minimal, and he more than makes up for any discomfort he’s causing you by railing your guts like he’s trying to rearrange them. Cooper’s hitting that sweet space inside you, his veiny cock rubbing just right around the curve of your body, your pussy fluttering around him as your climax begins.

Cooper locks you inside his arms, his thighs closing around yours, his mind completely lost in the desire to own you; whether or not you come is for Cooper to decide now, every beat of your heart belongs to him, every drop of your blood is now his. So when he lets you come, he takes something for himself as well, a little slice of your breath, his palm gripping your throat with just enough intensity to hold you back against the bed. His sweat drips between your lips as he rocks into you, hard and fast, the salt stinging your bottom lip where the skin is broken.

Cooper releases your throat as he comes, his head falling forward into the crook of your shoulder, his hips stuttering against yours as his final thrusts pump thick streams inside you. His chest is heaving, his breath hot on your neck and between your lips as he finds them, his tongue swiping tenderly across the sore spot on your bottom lip. He’ll make sure to take extra good care of you later tonight, bringing you a cold compress and some ointment for your lip; but for now, he scoops you up in his big arms, his limp little rag doll with a big smile on her mascara-streaked face.

“I’m sorry Daddy’s kisses got a little rough, princess,” Cooper says, and you see the concern in his eyes. His chest is sweaty and his heartbeat so comforting, you nuzzle into him deeper. “It’s okay, Daddy,” you murmur, gliding your tongue over your bottom lip, savoring the sting. “I like it when your kisses hurt...” 💋🩸

[serendipitous-girl]

𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲

⊱✿⊰ summary: you weren't the same afterwards, they've all noticed

⊱✿⊰ warnings: trauma, angst, past kidnapping, past assault, cult sacrifice, ptsd, depression, panic attacks. My daydream/lore is more angsty than this and also might be some sal x reader undertones since that is my daydream

⊱✿⊰ notes: so i have this like plot idea thing for sally face that i use for daydreams. This is entirely self indulgent and half of you guys might not understand it. But to sum it up: reader was going to be a sacrifice to the cult however was saved. Yeah

⊱✿⊰ taglist: @fashionablysouly @kozumesphone @lotus-sunn

It's been two weeks since you got away. You returned to school like normal, acting like your heart wasn't trapped within a cage.

Your parents didn't mention what happened; they didn't even know. They assumed you stayed at Larry's for a few days and never bothered to check to make sure. You sighed as you brushed your hair, untangling the knots like you wished you could to your brain.

Finally, you walked out of your apartment silently. Your skin felt like it was safety pinned together, like it was a plastic bag barely holding onto the bones and organs inside. Was this a body you were in? Or was it just a sack of flesh, deteriorating until you were nothing but rotting and vile?

You spotted Sal almost immediately, the combination of his prosthetic mask and bright blue hair made him easy to identify. He waved at you and came closer, casual behavior for him.

Yet your mind was stuck back there, when he found you crumpled on the floor your white gown soaked in blood. You weren't sure how he could bear to look at you, look at you and not think about how monstrous you felt. (Was it cruel to believe yourself monstrous when surely Sal has it worse?)

A cold hand rested on your shoulder, jumpstarting your heart and make your blood rush. It was like when they touched you, grabbed your arms and shoved you in the car as though to say good riddance. But it was Sal, it was your angel, your hero. He wouldn't hurt you, he wouldn't hurt you, he wouldn't-

"Hey? [Name], you okay?" Sal asked, tilting his head slightly to show his confusion. You blinked a few times, remembering your surroundings. Your brain and soul was in that room with those men, but your body was here and safe. Then how come you felt nowhere near safe in your body?

"I'm fine," You replied slowly, pulling away from his touch. Your lungs were filled with smoke, collapsing in on itself like a building on fire. You just needed to get away, forget about school just get away and get some air. Out of Addison apartments, out into the woods away from the cult away from the school away from it all.

"Hey, hey, stay with me. Come on, let's get some fresh air." Sal suddenly said, appearing in front of you and leading you out of the building. Noticeably he didn't touch you, he made sure to not make your skin feel anymore fake than it already did.

He sat down on a fallen tree, patting it for you to sit beside him. It poked you uncomfortably, sticks and bugs and whatnot hurting your backside but it was a fine way to stay active. Feeling pain meant you were alive, you were alive and safe.

"Can I hold your hand?" Sal asked, giving you enough space in case you said no. Shakily you nodded, surprisingly feeling relieved when his cold palm brushes against your own.

He slowly brought your hand to his chest, letting you feel as he takes deep breaths. You tried copying his breathing, in and out, in and out. Eventually your brain stopped fizzing like an exploded soda and you felt semi human once again.

"Thanks, Sal." You mumbled, looking away with an ashamed face. He shouldn't have to deal with you and whatever the hell that was just now. He still hadn't let go of your hand which was surprisingly nice.

"Its okay to not be okay." Sal replied, making your eyes snap back to his. He was staring directly at you, blue eye boring into your brain (it made you wonder if he could read every thought racing through your mind.) "You went through something...nobody can possibly imagine. I would be more concerned if you were perfectly fine."

"I want to be okay, though. I don't want to be trapped back there." You replied softly, acting like this was a confession of sin. You never mention what happened with your friends; let alone explain what had happened before they saved you.

"I saved you once and I'll save you again." Sal said, squeezing your hand gently, "I promise you, [Name], I will stop at nothing to make you happy again."

You smiled even though it hurt, feeling the tiniest bit of hope form in your heart. If anyone could save you, you were grateful it was Sal to do it. Right now living felt like torture but you would go through torture to stay with Sal.

[missblissy]

Little Things! Astarion x Reader HCs

A/n: 😤😤 I’m just gonna say it, ya’ll don’t have enough casual domestic relationship headcanons in these tags. To much smut. Y’all need some water, come up for air or something good god I love y’all but drink some fucking water 😂 So have some HCs of Tav and Astarion in Act 1. GN! Tav with no class/race as always UwU Also thank you so much for all the likes and kind words on my last post! I plan on opening my requests soon so be sure to follow to stay updated on when that happens. 💖☺️ Enjoy!

Was it even possible for someone to be annoyed… and pleased at the same time? Could a contradiction even exist? Yes. It could. And it baffled Astarion. Sure you had a pretty face, a nice laugh, a way with words… A shimmer in your eyes… a crooked grin that barely broke a smirk… The faint and unmissable sound of your heart beat… A smell so signature he could pick it up in the subtle breeze.

Just with the shift of wind and now he was tossing and turning in his tent. Huffing and throwing his blanket over half his face. Thoughts racing with you now, all the way on the other side of camp and no where near him. Not even in his sight. And still you were in his mind.

How annoying. This was just a misguided, maybe even a malicious attempt at forging an alliance. So why did he feel so… bad? His red eyes couldn’t close so he just stared at the fabric wall of his tent. A blank but also bitter stare on his face.

Out of all the books he read, and he read a lot, none of them actually showed him what real was. What was real passion? Not the mask he wore. What was real conviction and adoration? All he knew was what he’s done for centuries. And this was nothing but uncharted and unfamiliar territory.

So why was it your delightful and diluted scent in the wind alone just enough to send him reeling? He couldn’t know, or didn’t dare to wonder.

These little things didn’t stop there. During the day you’d bounce up to him with a skip in your step… that equally would send a skip right into his ribs and tore up his lungs. With big bright eyes you’d show him something random, something you found, something you made… it didn’t matter.

Just the way you beamed with a radiant smile the sun could be jealous of, it was enough for a snide back handed comment that could be confused for a flirt, “Oh darling, for me? You shouldn’t have, you might just be one of my most devoted fans,” Normally a line like this worked. Either it would send the conversation towards the bedroom or someone left standing alone.

Neither happened. You just rolled your eyes, gave a little laugh and said, “A fan? In your dreams,” And go on chatting like before, unfazed by his little remarks. You were an enigma to him.

Especially during times after a battle. It was always such a gentle touch, when you’d place a hand on his shoulder and praise him for his good work and efforts in the battle.

If vampires had blood to blush he would. He didn’t understand why he wanted to hear more of it, “That was a good job you did out there today,” or maybe it was the way you said, “You did amazing,” He could listen to praises all day. He never knew how much he enjoyed them before.

Let’s not forget, he could hear your heartbeat. Not yours alone. Everyone had a different rhythm and rhyme. For instants Shadowheart, her heart was slow, sad, faint but still beating away with life. Astarion could hear it, just the same as Lae’zel who seemingly had no heart beat at all until the surprising thumb of it came every hour or so. He could hear yours too. Rattle away within your bones. And he paid close attention.

Normally these ‘skills’ of listening to hearts were used to hunt out a target for his master. But with no master and a band of fools, he still used these skills unbeknownst to himself.

He’d listen with eyes glued to a book. You’re heart pitter pattered like any other. But sometimes it’d start racing, picking up speed. Not to long ago a racing heart was the first step into picking a target, since the heart never lies and when a fool looked Astarion’s way if their heart sang that song he knew who would be his unfortunate soul.

But no, this time he just peered from over his book and watched you stare off into the distance, into the darkness of the woods. To his surprise there wasn’t a glance his way or even at anyone. Your heart only raced for fear it seemed. Even when you looked at him or shared a conversation, the same steady beat flowed.

It was something little like this, these little things only he knew as they festered in his mind. They ached within him. He hid it well but it wretched at his organs and plucked at his fibers every time. It was annoying. It was… wonderful…

It was terrifying. The way his breathe would catch when you’d ask him to join you. The way he actually felt anger, as petty as it was, when you asked him to stay back at camp.

Or maybe when he’d hear just the sound of your voice, distant on the other side of camp, muffled, not even loud enough to hear what you were saying but just enough to hear your voice. How strange that something so little as that was enough to ease him into sleep.

[teshadraws]

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Seekers of Soul

[Chapter 60]

<< First | < Previous | Next >

-

Tobias speaks with Dismas.

CW: Blood, violence, child death.

-

In the silence, Dismas gives them an uninterested onceover, starting at Nia and ending with Tobias. When the pangoro reaches Tobias’ face, his brow furrows, his chin lifting with a spark of interest.

Tobias can’t decide if he wants to glare back or look away. His throat is tight. He balls the hand not holding Nia’s into a fist, trying to keep himself from shaking like a newborn.

Suddenly, the pangoro’s brows rise, and a toothy grin lights up his face. He rears back as much as he can in his chains, roaring with laughter. He’d probably be slapping his knee if he could.

Tobias stares, stunned. When he’d imagined this in the past, thought about coming face-to-face with one of the outlaws, he’d never pictured laughter. He kind of feels like puking.

Dismas’ laughter dies down, but the jovial expression remains. “You’re the little brat from the mountains! How long’s it been? Five years? Six?”

He says it like a distant relative catching up. Like he’s asking how Tobias’ training has been going, instead of reuniting with the child he made an orphan.

“It’s been eight years,” Tobias hisses. He can’t decide if he wants to attack the pangoro or run away. Nia’s grip anchors him in place.

“Huh. Time flies. You’re still a squirt, but you were a tiny little thing then. No bigger than my paw.”

Dismas lifts a paw as far as he can with the chains restricting him, and wiggles his fingers. His claws flash in the low light. He could probably still crush Tobias without a second thought, but when Tobias was younger, when he was half his current size, it would’ve been effortless. Vivi was even tinier.

Tobias grits his teeth, anger slowly overpowering the terror. He can feel his control slipping, embers climbing into his throat.

“You a big-shot Seeker now?” Dismas asks, still so casual. He gestures to the scarf around Tobias’ throat.

Tobias’ free hand lifts, grabbing the worn material as if to keep it from him. This scarf was Vivi’s, and Tobias will die before he lets this monster touch it.

Dismas’ gaze moves to Nia. “This your little partner?”

Nia doesn’t answer, but Tobias can feel her squeeze his hand just a bit tighter. She’s standing tall out of the corner of his eye.

Dismas huffs. “You gonna say anything or are you two just here to waste my time?”

Tobias takes a step forward, fire boiling over. “Shut up! You aren’t the one asking questions here!”

Dismas’ brow rises. “Well, go on then. I don’t have all day.”

Tobias wants to lunge for the pangoro’s throat. Nia tugs him back a step, away from Dismas and back to her side. Tobias can’t tell if she’s shaking too, or if that’s just him.

Tobias swallows, gut churning.

“Why?” He rasps. “Why did you kill them?”

Dismas looks unimpressed by the question. “You were there, brat. Surely you remember.”

Tobias was there, but he doesn’t remember. He can’t. Every time he’s ever tried to remember the details, panic has risen like a tide, swamping his thoughts and choking him for air, sending him flailing until he stops.

Dismas, in response to Tobias’ silence, shrugs a shoulder. “Sulien ordered it.”

Tobias takes a breath, tears brimming in his eyes. He blinks them back. “Why did Sulien want to kill them? My dad was an instrument-maker. My mom was a mail-mon. My sister was six. They…there’s no way they were involved in something shady, and we…it’s not like we had a lot of money. So why?”

Tobias hates the way his voice breaks. He hates that this is how he has to get his answers. He hates being at the mercy of Dismas yet again.

The pangoro snorts. “It’s not like we went there planning it. There was a storm.”

Tobias knows there was a storm, but that doesn’t explain anything. Why would the storm be important? Tobias doesn’t know, he doesn’t remember, he—

…He does. He does remember.

———————————————————

It’s raining. Hard. Has been all day, and although storms usually pass quickly in the mountains, this one doesn’t look like it’s gonna let up anytime soon.

Since she can’t fly safely in this kind of weather, Mama’s home today—a rarity in the middle of the afternoon. She takes over for Papa’s lessons to let him work in peace, playing little games with Toby and Vivi to help them learn their letters and math.

Each time they finish a lesson, Mama lets them each hold onto one of her giant wings. She flaps them open to fling her children up with shrieks of laughter before gently catching them and lowering them back to the ground. Usually they can get three rounds out of her with cries of “Again! Again!” before she puts her foot down and they have to start the next lesson.

It’s a peaceful day. A bit boring, even, until late afternoon when a shadow—three shadows—block out the gray light from the mouth of the cave.

Toby recognizes the biggest Pokemon from one of his books. He remembers, ‘cause he’s a fire type like them. A growlithe, maybe? Wait, no, an arcanine.

His ear is shredded like an old piece of fabric, scars cutting through his fur and across one of his eyes. His fur is limp with rain, though, and he has a sheepish smile on his face, so he doesn’t seem scary.

There’s another Pokemon standing behind him with his arms folded and an unhappy scowl on his face. He’s tall, with black and white fur.

The third Pokemon, a crobat, came in dangling from the tall Pokemon’s arm, but quickly hopped off to huddle in the dirt instead. His wings are crossed over his body, looking too drenched to fly.

“Sorry for intruding,” the arcanine says, friendly and warm. “We were hoping we could get out of the rain for a while?”

———————————————————

Tobias blinks. He stares at Dismas. “You…you said you wanted to get out of the rain.”

“Yup.”

“But that…” Tobias’ heart is pounding faster. Why does he feel like he’s the one being interrogated here?

Tobias glances at the quagsire standing guard off to the side, as if she’ll somehow have the answers. The quagsire looks back at him, sharp gaze softened by something sad and sympathetic.

Tobias doesn’t have time for her pity. He avoids Nia’s gaze entirely, looking back at Dismas. “B-But that wasn’t true, right? You were just…lying. To get to us.”

Dismas snorts. “Why would we lie? The idiots wanted out of the rain.”

“But why our cave?!”

“We ran across your cave by chance, brat. Your family just had the bad luck of living in the first decent shelter we found going over the mountain range.”

Tobias stares at Dismas, disbelief making him feel numb.

By chance? Bad luck?

Tobias’ family was killed because of bad luck?

That—that can’t be right. Tobias lost his whole world that night. There has to be a better reason. There has to be some reason why his family had to go through that. Why he had to go through that.

“What do you mean?” Tobias asks, trying make the words a demand. They come out weak and lost. “If it was just by chance that you met us, then why did you attack us?!”

“You don’t remember.”

No, Tobias doesn’t remember, because he can’t ever let himself remember that night in full. Because when he tries, the panic comes back in full force and shuts him down before he even gets a chance.

Tobias snarls, a wordless and feral sound. A threat.

Dismas rolls his eyes. “Your mom figured us out.”

Tobias stops, breathing hard. Embers flutter in the edges of his vision.

Just like that, just like a twig holding together a dam, everything falls loose.

He remembers.

———————————————————

His parents are welcoming, at first. His mama jokes with the arcanine and crobat, Sulien and Asra, about the rain while his father adds kindling to the fire to give it extra warm.

Toby is a little shy, as he always is around strangers. Even more with big, strong strangers like these ones.

Vivi echoes all of his awe without the shyness, immediately bouncing around the strangers’ paws with question after question about their names and species and types and where they’re from. The tall one, a pangoro named Dismas, is clearly annoyed by her curiosity, but Asra and Sulien smile and answer patiently.

The storm rages on far longer than anyone expects, into the evening. Vivi has graduated from crawling around Sulien’s giant paws to to climbing over the arcanine’s fluffy back and mane. She’d scrambled her way up the fire type’s shoulders before their parents could stop her, and once there the arcanine had assured them she was fine. Toby had settled in at Sulien’s paws, listening to the adults talk.

The strangers tell them that they’re called Team Zenith, and they focus on rescue work.

“Is that how you got that scar on your face?” Vivi asks, sprawled stop Sulien’s fluffy head and peering down at him.

“Vivian!”  Mama scolds.

Sulien laughs. “It’s fine. No, this one was from a nasty fight.”

Vivi gasps. “A bad guy?!”

Sulien nods, solemn. “The worst.”

“Whoa.”

Toby echoes his sister, leaning back against the arcanine’s warm, fluffy chest. He loves his Mama and Papa, but there’s something really nice about a pelt so soft.

“Maybe I wanna be a Seeker when I grow up,” Toby muses.

“Oh! Me too! Me too!”

“You’ll both have to get a bit bigger first,” Mama teases, flicking her tail over to tickle Tobias’ side. He giggles and kicks her away.

Eventually, Mama excuses herself from the warmth of the fire to grab her mail for the following day. When the storm clears up, she’ll have a lot of deliveries to make. She brings them to the fire to organize by neighborhood, sorting them into piles.

Toby crawls into her lap, watching as she reads the name and location on each one before deciding which pile it belongs to. He tries to read them too and make it a race, but he’s a lot slower than her.

Conversation continues between the adults, interrupted only by Vivi’s occasional question or exclamation. Toby mostly listens, and reads, and sometimes puts a letter on the right pile when Mama points it out to him.

He perks up when they’re done with the regular mail and get to the guild notices. A lot of the papers are boring stuff that just go to the local guild outpost, but sometimes they have wanted posters that Mama has to pin up in town. Those are a little scary, but they’re kind of exciting, too.

Tobias skims the words he can see on the current paper, the sheet held a little too high over his head as Mama reads. Finally, she hands it over to him, pointing out where it needs to go. He lays it gently in place.

Mama picks up the next letter, and Toby feels it when she suddenly goes tense underneath him. Confused, he looks up at the paper she’s holding, seeing that it’s a wanted poster with pictures of outlaws on it.

Huh. Mama doesn’t usually get scared by wanted posters like Toby and Vivi sometimes do.

It’s taking way too long for her to hand it to him, so Toby tugs impatiently on his mom’s wrist. The paper is yanked down just enough for him to catch a glimpse of the pictures.

An arcanine with a scar. A crobat. A pangoro.

Mom yanks the letter away from him. He lets her, frowning up at her face in confusion.

“Mama, what—"

“Toby, go over to Papa.”

Toby hesitates, feeling like something is…wrong. Why was Team Zenith on the wanted poster? Toby thought those were only for bad Pokemon.

Mama doesn’t wait for him, sliding him off her lap and standing. She gathers the piles of letters with unusually sharp movements.

“Mama?”

“You’re fine, sweetie,” Mama says, neck dipping to brush her muzzle over his head. “I just don’t feel like working on those anymore tonight. I’ll get your help with them again later. Go over to your dad, okay?”

Her voice shakes.

Toby glances at Papa. He’s watching Mama now, smile gone.

Toby looks back at Mama. She’s watching Vivi, who is crawling all over Sulien and still chattering on about something.

Mama’s quiet. Like something’s wrong but she doesn’t want Toby and Vivi to know about it.

The arcanine smiles at Mama, apparently picking up on it, too. “Something wrong, ma’am?”

“No no. Just—Vivi, get off Mr. Sulien, all right?”

“Aww, why?” Vivi whines, little fingers tightening in his fur.

“Vivian!” Mama snaps.

Toby and Vivi both wince. Slowly, with a pout, Vivi slides down Sulien’s back and trudges over to Papa, leaning into his side. He wraps his tail around her.

“Toby, why don’t you come over here too?” Papa says, voice light. “It’s about time for bed.”

There’s something about his tone, though, that makes Tobias tense.

Toby doesn’t move. He doesn’t understand why that outlaw paper had Team Zenith on it, or why everyone suddenly got so quiet.

Mama is standing, not putting her papers away like she said she would. Like it’s important that Toby goes over to Papa before she does.

Papa is sitting up straighter than before, not letting Vivi move. He motions Toby closer.

It’s Asra who really makes Toby upset, though. The crobat suddenly looks sick to his stomach, gaze flicking between Sulien and Mama.

Sulien smiles. “You’re sure nothing is wrong?”

Thunder rumbles outside, long and low. Like the sky is growling.

Toby finally darts to his sister’s side, ducking under his papa’s tail and pressing close to his belly where it’s safe. He’s scared. He doesn’t know why he’s scared.

“You said you’re a mail mon, right?” Sulien asks politely.

His mama doesn’t answer.

“That includes notices to the guild, doesn’t it?”

Sulien stands up. He stretches, muscles rippling under striped fur.

“Show me that last notice you were sorting.”

Mama shakes her head. Toby doesn’t think he’s ever seen that look on her face. “We don’t want any trouble.”

“Shame,” Sulien says, casual. “Neither did I. But it seems trouble has found us regardless.”

Papa’s tail curls tighter around them, pressing them close.

“We don’t have much,” Mama says, low. Fervent. “But you can have it. Just go. Or let us go. We’ll go.”

“I’m afraid that’s really not the problem here,” Sulien says. “The problem is that we need to get out of this mountain range without anyone knowing where we’re heading next.”

“We won’t say anything,” Mama says, quick. Desperate. She’s usually the one picking fights, not trying to compromise.

Toby’s stomach feels cold.

“S-Sulien,” Asra says, hushed. “Come on, they said they won’t say anything. We can make them leave and—"

Sulien sighs, cutting the crobat off. “I’d really like to believe that. Unfortunately, you know I’d rather not take any chances.”

He flexes his paw, claws extending in the firelight.

Tobias flinches.

Vivi whimpers.

A growl pours from Papa’s throat.

His mama’s wings spread, making her bigger. She looks angry. She looks terrified.

———————————————————

“You really didn’t come there looking for us,” Tobias whispers, staring at Dismas. The pangoro stares back, expressionless.

It wasn’t some kind of shady business. Or even a robbery. It wasn’t anything against his parents at all.

They were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. They extended their kindness to the wrong Pokemon.

———————————————————

“I’m afraid I’d rather play it safe,” Sulien says. He flicks his shredded ear.

Dismas launches himself forward. Toby doesn’t even see the move that sends Mama flying back into the cave wall with a crack.

“Mama!” Toby shrieks.

He and Vivi try to push past Papa’s tail, but he drags them back.

“Aria!” His papa yells.

Mama pushes herself up, blowing a wave of fire out in front of her to ward the pangoro off. She glances at them, eyes wild. “Run, Silas!”

Papa hesitates for only a second. Then he scoops Tobias and Vivi up in his arms and bolts towards the mouth of the cave.

But it’s storming! Mama said they can never fly when it’s storming! It’s too dangerous. There’s rain and lightning and wind and—

And Sulien is there, standing large and proud against the darkness.

Papa stops. Toby can hear Mama fighting with the pangoro behind them.

“They’re just kids,” his papa says, voice tight. “Let them go.”

Sulien’s eyes move down to Toby and Vivi. “They are. But eventually they’ll be adults. And that one—” he nods at Vivi, who bares her teeth and growls, even with tears in her eyes. “Has the look of a hero. No, they’re old enough to realize what happened here.”

Toby feels his papa’s heart racing against his back, skin hot and clammy all at once. Slowly, he’s put down beside Vivi.

“Papa?” Toby asks, shaky. He’s trying to sniff back tears, but he can hear his mama snarling and the FWOOSH and heat of fire and Sulien is looking at them like a stranger, like a villain in a story and—

“Toby. Take your sister and run.”

Papa’s voice is low. Almost too low to hear.

Toby blinks. “W-What?”

They aren’t allowed out in storms, and definitely not on their own.

Papa spares him a glance. He swallows. “Run. Don’t stop running until you’re safe. And take care of your sister.”

“Papa?” Vivi says.

“We love you both,” Papa whispers. His voice is higher than usual. Rough. “So much.”

Before Tobias can answer, Papa is using his tail to sweep the two of them towards the mouth of the cave. Toby stumbles, Vivi crying out at his side.

Then Papa is arcing over them with a roar that shakes Toby to his bones. He watches with wide eyes as Papa and Sulien tumble together in a snarling blur of orange.

Everything is chaos. Growling and crashing and fire and—

Vivi slams into him, hugging him desperately. He wraps his arms around her on instinct, claws bunching into the oversized red scarf she always wears like a little cape.

“Tobias!” His mother roars. He looks over at her, panicked. She’s panting, one of her wings hanging in a sickening way at her side as the pangoro recovers from a heavy hit. “Run!”

“Asra!” Sulien barks. “Grab them!”

Tobias spins, locking eyes with the crobat. He’s flapping in midair, looking just as scared as Tobias feels.

“Sulien, they’re—they’re just kids. Surely we don’t need to hurt them, right?”

The word ‘hurt’ jolts Toby into movement. He grabs his sister by the hand and yanks her towards the entrance, tears blurring his vision.

A flash of purple flies by and blocks the entrance, making them stumble back. The crobat flaps in place, brow furrowed as he glances between them and Sulien.

Toby grabs Vivi tighter and darts to the side, hoping to skirt around the crobat. The crobat swoops at them, barely missing them. It feels threatening, like he’s going to pick them up and carry them away, but—

——————————————————

“He wasn’t really trying, was he?” Tobias rasps. “He…he was so much faster than that. He wanted us to escape. But…”

——————————————————

For an instant, Toby thinks they’re going to make it. They duck under the crobat’s wings and—

A heavy weight—a thousand times heavier than Mama and Papa when they play fight with them—slams into Toby, pinning him on his back. It knocks the air out of him. He tries to gasp for air as he looks up at his attacker.

Sulien doesn’t look scared like Asra. He doesn’t look like he’s feeling anything, except mild irritation. Toby feels the arcanine’s claws dig into his throat, bruising in their force and cutting off his air as something wet leaks down his skin.

Toby tries to kick, but he can’t reach the arcanine’s chest. Vivi screams and grabs the arcanine’s paw, trying to pull it off of him.

Sulien grabs her in his mouth like she’s nothing more than a toy, throwing her aside. She slams into the cave wall with a cracking sound and lands hard on her stomach.

Tobias tries to turn his head, his sister’s name on his tongue, but pain sears through his neck as claws tear at his soft throat.

Sulien’s mouth opens, and Toby sees nothing but fangs and fire lunging at him as he squeezes his eyes shut.

There’s a roar and a gust of hot air, and then the weight is gone from him entirely. Mama slams the arcanine into the wall with a sound that echoes and sends stone raining down from the ceiling.

Toby gasps and coughs as he scrambles up, reaching for his neck. His palm comes away red and slick with blood. It tickles as it streaks down his chest.

Toby ignores it, still coughing as he stumbles to Vivi’s side. She’s trying to push herself up, but one of her hands is pressed to the back of her head and the other shakes and trembles.

“Lemme see,” Toby rasps, kneeling at her side. He helps her sit up, then peels away the hand on her head. His heart stops when he sees slick red on her palm.

Vivi whines, slumping into Toby’s shoulder. He pulls her close, looking around frantically.

Mama is wrestling with Sulien now. Papa has turned on the pangoro, cornering him in the back of the cave. Asra is still stalled in place, staring at them with wide yellow eyes.

“Tobias! Run!” Mama yells again.

Toby jolts, then staggers to his feet. He feels lightheaded, spots in his vision, but he knows he needs to move. Vivi is clinging to him weakly, but she can’t seem to get her feet under her even when he tries to pull her up.

Toby feels renewed panic lap at him. Usually when they get hurt, when they scrape a knee or pull a claw, they go to their parents. And Vivi is clearly hurt, stumbling and tilting as if she’s dizzy.

He doesn’t know how to fix this.

Tobias decides on a different course of action. He swings Vivi around and pulls her onto his back, hopping to secure her higher. He nearly falls from the weight throwing him off balance, but staggers towards the mouth of the cave all the same.

“Asra, get those kids or you’re next!” Sulien snarls.

There’s no protest this time. A blur of purple flashes out of the corner of Toby’s eye, swooping for him again. He ducks and runs faster, out of the cave.

The storm slams into him like a wall. The cold rain stings against his skin, whipping into his face like needles. He squints against it. Between the rain and wind and darkness, he can hardly see two feet in front of him.

Another snarl comes from the cave. Toby startles and takes off, stumbling over rocks and slipping in mud. Each time he does, Vivi whimpers, her face tucked away in the crook of his bloodied neck.

Tobias runs and runs through the darkness, sliding down steep inclines and through scraggly groups of trees. It’s a miracle he doesn’t run himself right off the cliffside, guided only by hazy memory and luck.

He feels like he runs forever.

His lungs burn. He can’t feel his legs. Vivi sits like a boulder tied to his back, deadweight, but he doesn’t dare slow down. His fingers feel locked into place by the cold.

He doesn’t stop until a deep mud puddle sucks his foot down. He falls hard onto his front, then lays gasping in the mud. Its icy cold burns, and eventually he summons the strength to push himself up and crawl out of the puddle he’d landed in.

He gently deposits Vivi onto the ground behind him.

She slumps over.

“Vivi?” Toby asks, panting.

Vivi lies motionless on the grass. Too quiet. Too still. She’s never that quiet and still, even when she’s asleep.

“Vivi?” Toby asks again, shaking her gently. She feels cold, but everything feels cold right now.

He turns her over, to find her eyes closed and her little brow furrowed. He pats her cheek. “Vivi? Vivi, c’mon. W-Wake up! We…we gotta go. We gotta hide. O-Or get help, or…”

Vivi doesn’t answer. Fresh panic blooms in Tobias’ chest, and hot tears flood his eyes. He can’t tell what’s rain and what’s tears.

He shakes her a little harder. Her head lolls.

“Vivi!” He shouts.

She doesn’t wake up. Is it—is it because she hit her head?

He turns her over in his lap, breath hitching when he sees the place she smacked the back of her head against the cave wall when Sulien threw her. The rain has been washing out the wound, but it still glistens with fresh blood. Tobias knows head wounds bleed a lot, especially in the mountains, but the scariest part is how the spot looks almost…dented. Just a bit.

Toby looks around desperately. He can’t see anyone in the darkness and rain, and he knows there aren’t many other Pokemon who live near their home, but—

But he’s so scared. He’s never been so scared in his entire life.

“Help!” Toby yells, voice hoarse. Sulien and Asra and Dismas might hear him, but…but his sister is hurt.

“Help!” He yells again, a hot wave of tears filling his eyes to streak down chilled cheeks. “Please!”

He yells and yells, but nobody answers.

Tobias suddenly remembers what Papa told them, a long time ago. That they should pray to Entei if they ever feel scared or unsafe. He protects kids like them! He’ll help. He has to.

“E-Entei, please help us. Please, I’m really scared and Vivi needs help a-and I don’t know what else to do.”

Toby waits again. The storm continues overhead, loud and cold and endless. Entei doesn’t appear on fiery paws to whisk them away. There’s no big, strong presence to shield them from the rain.

They’re on their own.

Toby sniffs hard, looking down at Vivi. He doesn’t know what to do. Did she lose too much blood? Or is something inside her hurt? What did Mama say that one time about bad injuries?

You…you need to stop the bleeding if you get hurt real bad. You need to put something on the injury.

Tobias doesn’t have supplies, but his eyes land on Vivi’s scarf, its red hue looking dull and drab in the darkness and rain. Vivi’s going to be so mad at him for getting blood on her favorite scarf, but—but this is more important.

Toby unknots the scarf with shaking hands, then presses the soaking wet fabric against the wound. He expects Vivi to whine or cry out, since it has to hurt.

She doesn’t move. She still hasn’t moved.

Thunder rumbles again. The rain comes down in sheets, painful and freezing against his nearly-numb skin. Toby needs to find shelter soon. Sitting out in the rain for too long is dangerous for any fire type, but especially kids. Especially in the mountains.

Toby starts to drag Vivi onto his back again, when something catches his eye.

The tip of her short tail.

Dark.

Tobias drops her. He hates himself for it immediately, but he does. He hovers over her—her body—her, and shivers, and stares.

No. No no no.

B-But—but maybe she’s still okay? Maybe she’s just hurt, really bad, but if he gets her help, then…

Tobias presses the side of his head to Vivi’s chest.

He waits. And waits. Two rolls of thunder. Three. The rain doesn’t let up.

No breath. No heartbeat.

Toby whimpers. Then he gathers air into his lungs and wails. He thought that he knew what it was like, to be upset. To be scared. To be in pain. He remembers crying to Mama and Papa really hard that one time he pulled a claw.

This is something else. His voice rips out of him like it’s alive, like he has no control over it. He drapes himself over Vivi, crying, pleading for her to come back. He doesn’t know how long.

She doesn’t answer.

Tobias doesn’t remember getting up. He doesn’t remember leaving Vivi. He doesn’t remember wandering off with his sister’s scarf clenched tight in his fingers.

He does remember stepping just a bit too close to a cliffside that was loosened by the rain. Remembers how it gave out from underneath him. Remembers how he didn’t even yell, falling and falling and then—

Darkness.

Next time he woke up, he was bandaged and warm, tucked into a soft bed. The nice Pokemon who found him half-buried under rubble had taken him to the village doctor. Tobias had asked the doctor where his sister was, or his parents, and he knew right away what the old ‘mon’s tight smile and evasive answers meant.

His family was gone.

——————————————————

A painful squeeze of Tobias’ hand catches his attention. What is that? Did Sulien come back for him? No, he’s safe at the doctor’s house, he—

He stares at the riolu in front of him, uncomprehending. There’s not a riolu at the doctor’s, and certainly not in his cave.

Her ruby eyes are glassy with tears, and she’s holding his hand. Something about her makes him feel safe.

She’s saying something, but Tobias can’t hear her, his heartbeat loud in his ears. He can read her lips, though, as she repeats one word to him, over and over.

Breathe.

Tobias tries to listen, taking a shaky breath of air. Then another, and another. The riolu doesn’t look away, smiling encouragingly and breathing with him.

Slowly, Tobias feels his body settle into the room around him. It’s warmer here than in the rain, but colder than the doctor’s house. Darker, lit a muted green. His ears feel funny. His free hand is pulling at his—at Vivi’s scarf, and his neck burns as if the marks left there haven’t long since scarred over. There’s a quagsire and malamar watching him with sympathetic expressions, and—

Tobias freezes when he sees the pangoro. Dismas. Dismas is here, he’s going to hurt Mama and Papa and Vivi and the riolu and—

“Tobias!” The riolu places both paws on either side of his face, turning him away from the pangoro until all he can see is her. “Ignore him. Keep breathing with me, okay?”

Tobias doesn’t think he can, but he nods anyways and tries to follow the riolu’s exaggerated breaths. In. Out. Again.

Tobias doesn’t know when the riolu in front of him turns into someone he knows, but suddenly his brain remembers that she has a name.

Nia.

He latches onto her paws, taking stock of himself.

His eyes sting, as if he was crying. He’s still shaking, but his breathing is steadier. The grief and terror in his chest feels fresh, painful as the day he lost his family.

Tobias must make a pitiful sound, because Nia shushes him gently, murmuring, “Hey, stay here with me, okay? You back?”

Tobias nods, trying to stay in the present. He focuses on the cool metal underfoot. Nia’s soft paws on his cheeks. The sight of her eyes, red cooled to a deep brown in the green light. The quiet creak of the metal room around them.

He’s here. He’s in Kaleido Bay, with Nia. And he finally has the answer he has wanted all these years. He finally knows why his family was ripped away from him.

Chance.

Has Tobias wasted the last eight years of his life, looking for this? For a simple, nonsensical answer that changes nothing? An answer that was hidden away inside his own head?

If Sulien gets captured by other Seekers like Dismas had, then…what is Tobias’ goal? Without answers to find and the outlaws to track down, what does he have to strive towards?

What does he even have to live for?

“We really messed you up, huh?” Dismas says. The pangoro doesn’t sound remorseful. If anything, he says it like a joke, lighthearted and casual.

Nia snaps her teeth at him. “Shut up!”

Tobias looks at Dismas again. He tries to speak, then has to clear his throat to get the words to come. “You…don’t even care, do you? About what you did?”

Dismas snorts. “Your family wasn’t the first ‘mon we had to take out, kid. I can’t afford to get all weepy about it. I’m not Asra.”

“The crobat?” Nia murmurs. “Wasn’t he your partner?”

“A coward is what he was. Always trying to avoid getting his claws dirty. I bet that softhearted idiot didn’t even look for you brats after Sulien told him to. I was surprised Sulien let him run off at all, at least with his skull intact.”

Nia glances at Tobias before saying, “Asra’s, um…dead. He died in a rockslide.”

Dismas barks a laugh. “Ah, there it is! Looks like Sulien found him after all.”

Their faces must ask the question for them.

“Asra was spineless, but he was fast. He wouldn’t have gotten taken out by a rock slide. Not a natural one, at least.”

Nia looks vaguely sick. “You mean..?”

“Sulien always hated how much of a softie Asra was. Trying to run and start a new life with so much blood on his fangs? When he knew all of our history? Nah. He was a danger Sulien couldn’t risk keeping alive. It was only a matter of time for him.”

“And you?” Nia challenges. “Is Sulien the reason you got caught?”

Dismas laughs again. “No, we parted ways a while ago. I had enough of his brilliant ideas and decided to strike out on my own.”

“Lot of good that did you,” Nia mutters.

“You mean this place?” Dismas asks, making a vague gesture around the room with one restrained paw. “I needed somewhere to crash for a while. Time to figure out where I’m going next and all that. But now that you mention it, I am getting sick of the slop they serve here as food.”

Dismas looks past them, towards the malamar standing guard at the door. “Hey, beak face!”

The malamar straightens up, tentacles flaring. “Quiet down, D22.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be quick.” Dismas grins, toothy and goading. “Just thought you’d want to know that your little disable treatments haven’t been lasting as long as you wanted ‘em to.”

He lifts both paws as high as he can, curling them into fists. One paw bursts into flames, bright enough to be painful to Tobias’ eyes in the dim light. The other fist glints in the fire’s light, coated in ice.

Tobias feels a familiar sense of dread pool in his gut.

“Put your attacks away!” the malamar shouts, marching closer. The quagsire backs up a step, falling into a defensive stance.

“Aw, but I’ve been having a lot of fun in here with my little science experiments,” Dismas chuckles, opening his fists and dismissing the elemental energy. “You do know what happens when you heat and cool chains so frequently, right?”

The pangoro pulls his arms in, straining them against the metal chains. Tobias can hear them creak and groan for just a second before—

The chains snap like a cheap toy.

Tobias scrambles backwards, nearly tripping over his own feet. Nia moves with him.

Dismas isn’t the fastest ‘mon, but he’s still faster than the quagsire beside him. Before the water type can shoot off a move, the pangoro spins to punch her in the gut, the bright glint of metal following in his wake.

Bullet punch.

The quagsire resists steel type moves, but she still goes skidding back, slamming into the metal wall with a loud bang. Tobias flinches, seeing Vivi, hearing rain—

The malamar rushes past them, pushing Nia and Tobias back with one tentacle and attacking Dismas with the other. Dismas catches the move in a giant paw, grinning, shackles and broken chains dangling from his wrists.

The pangoro turns, swinging the malamar with him, and slams him into the floor, leaving a dent in the metal.

“Miro!” the quagsire calls, getting back to her feet. “Send out an alert!”

Right! The malamar’s a psychic-type. They must have some kind of telepathy system set up here to communicate.

Except the malamar doesn’t answer, rolling to dodge a heavy fist. He lunges into a peck that Dismas barely wards off with his legs and neck still shackled. The malamar looks almost frenzied, going after the pangoro with a vicious aggression. It’s strange, and so unsettling a strategy to see from a psychic type that Tobias realizes with a sinking heart what Dismas was doing earlier.

Taunt.

All the malamar can do is attack. And that is a terrible thing for a Pokemon who likely relies on stat changes and status moves to fight.

It’s clear from the easy way that Dismas handles the psychic type. With a single throat chop that leaves the malamar gasping, Tobias can see the end coming. Dismas sweeps his arm back, dark type energy leaving streaks like black lightning in its wake, then stabs a shadow claw through the malamar’s gut.

Nia makes a shrill sound, stumbling back with her paws clamped over her muzzle. Tobias just watches with a sick sense of deja vu.

Dismas lets the energy dissipate.

The malamar drops and lies still.

Tobias has to believe he’s alive, despite the odds. He can’t watch this monster kill another Pokemon right in front of him.

Dismas takes advantage of the moment of stunned silence. He lifts massive paws to grab either side of the shackle around his neck, snapping it open like a chestnut to drop at his paws. He sighs, satisfied, and rolls his neck with a crack that makes both Nia and Tobias wince.

The quagsire jumps into action, rushing at the pangoro. Her cheeks puff up with a water gun.

Dismas ducks under the first jet, fists flashing with fire before he punches right through the two chains holding his legs in place. Those, too, break with little resistance, likely weakened beforehand for this chance at escape.

The quagsire is slower than Dismas, but she fights strategically, keeping her distance when possible to shoot off a water pulse or mud shot. When she sees an opening, she moves in closer for an aqua tail or slam attack.

Tobias wants to help, afraid of what will happen if and when the quagsire goes down, but…Tobias knows what it’s like, trying to fight in close quarters with a partner you’re unused to. It can cause more problems than staying out of the fight entirely. They’d likely just get in the way.

Tobias glances at the crank to the door over his shoulder, wondering if they could open it themselves, but it’s nearly as tall as them. There’s no way they could get enough leverage.

Before Tobias can think of anything else, the quagsire is slammed down with enough force to dent the metal floor. She’s still fighting, landing a powerful drain punch on the pangoro that actually makes him grunt in pain, but Tobias gets the feeling that she isn’t going all-out. Whether that’s because she can’t use moves like surf or earthquake in this delicate prison cell without risking collateral damage or because she’s afraid of hurting Nia, Tobias, and the malamar, it’s clear to Tobias that she’s holding back.

She still puts up an impressive fight, but it only takes a few more powerful, unrestrained blows from Dismas before the quagsire thuds to the metal floor and stays there, out cold.

And with that, everything falls quiet. All Tobias can hear is the roar of his heartbeat in his ears. He stares at the pangoro, fear building in his gut.

Not again. He can’t do this again.

Nia steps in front of him, paws raised in a fighting stance. She looks confident, if you aren’t close enough to see the way she’s trembling.

Dismas turns to the two of them, huffing a laugh when he sees Nia’s stance. “What, you squirts wanna fight? You could just let me walk out, you know.”

Nia glances back at Tobias, as if asking what he wants to do. Tobias stares past her, unable to answer. He knows he’s shaking.

Tobias wanted this, not so long ago. He wanted the chance to take down the outlaws that killed his family. But now, trapped in here with Dismas, knowing he and Nia’s lives are on the line if they try to fight? Knowing what the pangoro can and will do, without a second thought?

Tobias is afraid. He wants to run. Hide. Let Dismas go without a fight.

But he can’t.

He can’t risk Dismas going free. He can’t risk the pangoro doing more harm to anyone else.

Tobias forces himself to breathe. Forces himself to step forward on stiff, shaky legs to stand beside Nia. He crouches into his own battle stance, trying to summon his fire.

Dismas laughs. “I’m impressed! Seeing as you just about wet yourself earlier, I thought you’d turn tail at the first sign of trouble.”

The pangoro strolls away from them, towards the far wall of the room. His broken chains drag on the metal floor with every step. He stops in front of the nearest of the tall, slim windows.

“If you wanna play hero…”

Dismas flings out a paw, slamming it into the window with a heart-stopping crack. It’s the way he’s holding his fingers, flat in a chopping motion, that tips Tobias off to what he just did.

The reflect and light screen cast over the glass, the only thing reinforcing it, stand no chance against a brick break attack. The barriers flicker, shimmering outward from the hit before dissipating entirely.

The unprotected glass cracks, splintering like a fault line. Right where Dismas’ fist hit, frothy water bursts in, spilling across the floor in an endless, powerful jet of water. In a room like this, sealed tight, it’s only a matter of time before it floods the space completely. It’d be a death trap for most Pokemon, but especially for Tobias.

Dismas grins as he turns back to them, toothy and ruthless. “Then let’s play.”

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Endurance 1

Warnings: this fic will include obsessive behaviour, possible non/ducbon, bullying, and other elements which may not be specifically triggered. Please be cautious in continuing on to the story.

Character: Walter Marshall

Summary: A fellow gym go makes your workouts even more taxing.

Please reblog and leave some feedback, preferably in a reblog but you can always drop by my asks. I always love working in y'alls ideas with these AUs so I am so excited to hear from you.

As always, take care of yourself <3 be kind and be patient. Love you.

No tag lists. Please review my pinned and bio for guidelines.

You come out of the changing room and peek at the wall mirror as you pass. You admire your new bubblegum pink leggings and polka dot top. It’s a bit out there but you’ve seen neons in this place that make your retinas burn. Besides, you’ve never been shy when it comes to fashion. It’s not just your passion, it’s your job. 

It’s late enough that the bodies there are far and few between. You prefer the nights when the gym feels like a ghost town. The air is quiet but not stagnant.  

Your water bottle swings on its handle from your hand as your bouncy steps keep in time with the boppy music thrumming in your earbuds. Your workout mix is a nice blend of retro and contemporary bass hits. You catch yourself humming and stamp it down. Sometimes, you forget other people can perceive you, not that there’s many around to so.  

You find an empty mat. They all are. You put your bottle down and start your stretches. Your late night sessions help clear your mind though it never really stops. In your mind, you’re seeing pleats, seams, and ruffles. 

Your body moves without thinking. It’s all muscle memory. You’re no gym rat, you don’t go that hard, just enough to loosen up your muscles. Your note overly swoll as the young ones call it. You’re fit enough for a light jog and the stairs don’t leave you winded like they used to. 

After your stretches, you slurp loudly from the straw of your water bottle, walking with it still between your lips as you head for an elliptical. You can just let the repetitive motion take over. You pop your lips off the tub and slip the bottle into the little plastic holder on the side of the machine. 

As you climb up, you see another figure across the floor. The man sits on the end of a weight bench. For a moment, it looks, even feels, like he’s watching you. From there, you can’t see very well. You don’t wear your glasses in the gym since you lost a pair to a hungry leg press. 

You can make out dark hair and his burly form. Hazy but wide enough to clock. Most people around here are stacked. You’re too casual for all that. And you like a piece of tiramisu with your Friday lattes. 

You pick your speed and start to climb. You cling to the machine and rock your head to the music. Once more, your throat vibrates and you have to remind yourself to stop. You can’t help it, you love Destiny’s child. Does that date you? For someone working in fashion, you can’t ever risk that. 

You zone out, vision blurring as you let your body do the work. The sweat speckles and slicks across your skin. Damn, you might just be bootylicious after this work out. 

Your fitbit rumbles and you look down. You’re in the zone. You keep going until you hit thirty minutes and slow down. You cool off for ten minutes and swipe up your bottle, sucking on it greedily as you head back to the mats. 

You swing out your arms and stretch your legs in slowly lunges. You bend forward, touching each toe with opposite hand, lingering with your ass up as you brace your hips. A sudden clang has you standing straight so fast you nearly topple onto your butt. 

You throw out your arms to catch your balance as you let out a pathetic, ‘woah-oh-oh'. You look over at the man as begins reps with the heavy dumbbells. You’ve never gotten above the tens. His blue eyes flash in your direction and you give a sheepish smile. 

You don’t want to seem weird so you return to your stretches. Arms up, lean to one side, then the other. You hear a strange rumble, like thunder, and look over at the man as he continues to work his traps, staring at you. You could even call it a glare. 

You tap your ear bud as you face him, “sorry?” 

“Do you have to make that noise?” He snarls. 

Your brows pop up. We’re you humming again? Oops. 

“Sorry, I didn’t realise I was,” you smile and before you can tap play, he scoffs.  

“Typical,” he grumbles as alternates to biceps. 

He’s built. He’s arms are bigger than your head. Probably. You don’t think he’d let you compare for scale. You drop your hand without tapping. 

You get down and extend your legs in front of you. His breaths underline your movement as you bend one leg over the other and push your straight arm against it as you twist. As you do the other side, facing him, his gaze flicks over again. 

“You put more time into choosing that outfit than you do working out,” he shakes his head. 

You blanch. Oh wow. You must have been really out of tune if he’s that grumpy. You give a tight-lipped smile and keep going. He’s not the first grouch you’ve dealt with. Your editor is a chronic miser. 

You straight arms and legs and bend to touch your toes. You then pull your arms back and plant your hands. You lift your pelvis and torso and lean your head back, raising yourself in a straight line as you hang your head back. 

“Form is off,” he mutters. 

You lower back down and look at him again. 

“Oh, uh, do you have any tips?” You ask curiously. He grimaces. You push your shoulders up and tilt your head, “well, if you think of any, I'd be happy to work on it. I’d hate to hurt myself.” 

You get to your knees and groan as you push yourself to your feet. He tuts as gets down to plank, still gripping the weights. He lifts the left and puts it back down, then the right. You watch him for a minute, impressed by his strength. Your wary of lifting too much, you don’t trust yourself. 

“You think your cute,” he sneers under his breath. 

“Um, sometimes,” you hover across from him, “I just thought you might know more than me--” 

“Of course I do,” he puffs between lifts. 

“Mm, okay, well, I’d love to learn--” 

“They got trainers for that,” he snips as he finishes his reps and puts his knees down. 

“Right, um, sorry to bother then. I was only... asking,” you turn and grab your bottle. 

You flip the top up again and slurp. You get to the bottom, sucking air loudly up before giving up. He huffs and stands with the weights, slamming them back on the rack. 

“Do you have to make so much goddamn noise?” He stands straight and turns to you, crossing his thick arms. You stop short and part your lips. 

“It’s empty, I didn’t--” 

“It’s not the only thing’s that empty,” he taps his skull, “go back to the mall, girl.” 

You scrunch your nose, “you don’t have to be rude, mister.” 

“Honesty is a gift,” he snorts. 

You pull your chin back. You didn’t mean to annoy him and you apologised already. You’re a nice person but you don’t appreciate his tone. 

“Well, if I’m being honest,” you put your hands on your hips, “you’re not very nice.” 

He chortles as a crease forms in his forehead, “and you’re not as cute as you think.” 

“What does it matter what I think I am?” You challenge, “I didn’t ask you.” 

“No, you just float around like some airhead and disturb everyone else,” he accuses. 

You peer around, “there’s no one here.” 

He drops his arms and lifts his chin. He steps forward and you waver, just a bit, put off by his size.  

“I’m here,” he says. 

You blink. What does that mean? 

He takes another step and you stare at him, necks and cheek burning. His words strike an epiphany. It’s just you and him. He’s a lot stronger than you. 

Another step and you put your hands up, “mister, you better not come any closer.” 

He scoffs again, “or what? Are you going to cry?” 

You pout and shake your head, “no, but I... I could scream. Or bite.” 

He shakes his head, “what do you think I’m gonna do, girl? That’s what you do, isn’t it? Make yourself the victim. You need the attention to make you feel special.” 

He’s getting closer. 

“I said stay away,” you project your voice as best you can, “I’m not afraid of you, mister.” 

He chuckles and tilts his head. He stops, just a step away from you, “aren’t you?’ 

Your eyes meet his and you stand trapped in the snare of his glower. His blue eyes are deep and fiery, his chiseled face is framed by dark curls and a thick beard, and his chin is cleft handsomely. He’s fearsome, a bear in man’s flesh. You’re no more than helpless hare. 

You back away and his mouth slants in triumph. He’s won. You turn and gulp, gripping tight your bottle as your sneaker squeaks loudly. You scurry away, buzzing with adrenaline. 

“That’s right, you run away, girl, run as fast as you can,” he calls after you, “not very, I’m sure.” 

You keep a brisk walk as you hurry towards the locker room and push inside. Your heart is hammering and your breathless as you reach your locker. You put the bottle on the bench and clutch the sides of your head. You’re dizzy as you try to get a rein on your frazzled nerves. 

You thought you left the bullies behind in high school, over a decade ago. In that second, you’re right back in your teenage years. Your eyes sting with tears and your stomach churns with humiliation. That glimmer of insecurity creeps back into you. 

No, no. You’re an adult. You’re a grown woman. You have a job and a life you love. You’re nothing they said you were. You proved them all wrong and you will prove that butthead wrong too.