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peppercookie · 7 years ago

Text

Sub-Zero's perfect woman.

/Had a bit of fun today creating this ‘fanfiction’ with Cassie and Sub-Zero. Hatters gonna hate./

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A test created by Raiden®. For the protectors and champions of Earthrealm.

Answers are given by Kuai Liang (Sub-Zero, the new Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei), threatened by Cassie Cage, his girlfriend.

Important Questions.

1. Are you single?

/Cassie holds a gun next to Sub-Zero's head/ □ – Yes. □ – Yes, and I like it that way. □ – I am still looking for the special one. ■ – Nope, sorry, I have a girlfriend.

2. Do you like women?

■ – Yes, I do. □ – I am bisexual. □ – I prefer men.

3. Do you find any of the women from the Mortal Kombat Tournaments attractive?

□ – Yes, all of them. □ – Some of them are pretty hot. ■ – I participated in the Tournaments to fight, not to look at boobs. /Sub-Zero: That's why Johnny was there../ /Cassie: Ha, he knows what humor is!/ □ – Haven't noticed anyone.

Her Looks.

4. What is your perfect woman's weight?

□ – Skinny. ■ – Normal weight/fit. □ – Curvy, with beautiful shapes. □ – Muscular.

5. How tall would you like her to be? /Sub-Zero: How tall are you Cassie?/ /Cassie: Aww, I'm 5'7. *wink*/

□ – Does it matter? □ – Above 5'9 (175 cm) ■ – 5'2/5'7 (160/170cm) □ – Under 5'2, maybe 5'0 (155/160cm)

6. What is her hair color?

■ – Dark. Like black, dark brown, etc. ■ – Light. Blond or golden brown. □ – Something crazy, like electric green or pink. □ – White. ■ – Red as the fire. /Cassie, triggered and ready to shoot Sub-Zero in the face: WHAT?!/ /Sub-Zero, gulping: What's wrong with liking more than one hair color?/ /Cassie, popping her bubble gum: Be careful, Grandmaster. The next thing I pop won't be my gum./

7. What is her hairstyle like?

■ – Short and punky. □ – Shoulder length. □ – Medium. □ – Very long and thick.

8. What color are her eyes? /up to two answers/

□ – Green. □ – White. ■ – Blue, like mine. □ – Chocolate brown. □ – Black. ■ – Irrelevant.

9. What is her skin color?

■ –White as the snow. □ – Dark like chocolate. □ – She is with an Outworld tan. ■ – I don't really care.

10. What kind of lips does she have?

□ – Full lips. □ – Small. ■ – Normal.

Her Character.

11. What are her hobbies? /up to four answers/

■ – Training and improving her fighting skills. □ – Reading. ■ – Doing some kind of a sport. □ – Playing musical instruments and/or singing. □ – Shopping, doing her make-up. □ – Cooking. □ – She doesn't have any hobbies. ■ – Partying. ■ – Stalking me. /Sub-Zero, sighing: More like threatening me./ /Cassie: Oh, I thought that turned you on, Kuai./ /Sub-Zero: You do realize that Kuai is my last name, don't you?/ /Cassie: Are you kidding with me?!/ /Sub-Zero, with a little devilish smile on his face: Maybe.../

12. What does she like doing in her free time? /up to four answers/

■ – Taking selfies. □ – Going for long and romantic walks. □ – Writing poetry. ■ – Bed exercises with me. /Cassie: He-he, you know me so well./ ■ – Protecting Earthrealm. ■ – Annoy me. /Cassie: Are you sure you want to give that answer?/ /Sub-Zero: Well, it says 'up to four answers', so I am simply following the rules. What would Johnny say in this situation 'Don't hate the player, hate the game'?/ /Cassie: Why do you keep bringing up my dad in all this?/ /Sub-Zero, stuttering: He will end my existence if he finds out about us./ □ – Studying. □ – Watching movies/tv shows.

13. What type of personality does she have? /up to three answers/

□ – Calm, distant and a bit cold. ■ – Witty, strong, brave. □ – Funny and romantic. □ – Carefree but a bit irresponsible. ■ – Reliable and really, really smart. □ – Got the brain of a chicken, but her beauty makes up for everything.

14. Is she older than or younger than you?

■ – Younger, maybe two-three years. /Sub-Zero: Somehow Raiden misspelled '20 years younger'./ □ – Doesn't matter. □ – She's one or two years older. □ – She's my age.

15. What is her occupation?

■ – She is a warrior and a protector of Earthrealm. □ – She's a doctor. □ – She is a housewife. □ – Still looking for a job. □ – She is a princess.

16. Does she have a motto? /choose one answer/

□ – I suppose. ■ – I hear her say 'You just got Caged' occasionally. □ – None that I'm aware of. □ – I'm sure she has one involving selfies and popping bubblegums.

17. From 1 to 10 how much does she love you?

□ – 0, she hates my guts. □ – 1 to 4, she's ok with me. □ – 4 to 7, in love with me. □ – 7 to 10, head over heels. ■ – 10 to 15, she's obsessed with me.

18. And how much do YOU love her?

□ – I don't have time for this thing called love. ■ – I'm crazy about her but won't admit it. /Cassie: Awww, is that right, Grandmaster?/ /Sub-Zero: Cassandra, you keep forgetting that there is a loaded gun resting on my right temple…/ /Cassie: Sucks to be you then./ /Sub-Zero: I will allow you to suck on something else when we finish with this test./ □ – She's alright I guess. □ – I am not sure.

Your relationship.

19. Where would you take her on your first date? /two answers/

■ – My chambers to show her my Ice Dagger. /Cassie: The modern way of saying it is 'Netflix and chill'./ /Sub Zero: I am chill alright, but what is this thing Netflix? Is it a special American dish?/ /Cassie: Haha, yeaaah, suure it is, Grandmaster. I'll show you what Netflix and chill is tonight./ □ – Theater or opera. □ – Romantic picnic. □ – Café or a restaurant. □ – In a park or a zoo. ■ – Somewhere beautiful, like China or Japan. □ – Nowhere…

20. She seems to be upset. What would you do if she runs away or starts crying? /two answers/

□ – I will hug her and tell her that everything will be alright. ■ – Destroy whoever or whatever made her upset. /Cassie: That's right! No one can mess with the girl of the Grandmaster... by the way, there is this guy that grabbed my ass while we were sparring./ /Sub-Zero, raising an eyebrow: Who is the imbecile you speak of? I will dispose of him immediately!/ ■ – Listen to her and comfort her. □ – I'd probably stand there like an idiot and do nothing. □ – I don't know.

21. The most beautiful woman in the world comes to you and says she loves you. Your reaction will be…

■ – 'No, you don't. You don't even know me that well.' □ – 'I love you too!' □ – I don't know what my reaction will be. □ – I will probably freeze her and walk away before she melts.

22. What is your favorite sex position?

/Sub-Zero: Why do I have the feeling that it was you who created the test, Cassandra?/ /Cass: Me?! More like the Netherrealm has completely corrupted Raiden's mind if he's interested in asking such questions./ /Sub-Zero: Hm, perhaps./ □ – Doggy, *woof woof*. □ – I've got 99 problems, but 69 ain't one of them. □ – Cassie as a cowgirl. □ – The classical missionary. ■ – All of the above?

23. You are going to be a father…

□ – Apparently, someone was not using protection. ■ – Say again? /Cass: Uh, Grandmaster... I have something to tell you. It's about the last time we did it./ /Sub-Zero, his eyes widening: Is it somehow related to this question or can it wait?/ /Cassie: The thing is... it's VERY related to this question. I'm pregnant./ ■ – *commits harakiri* /Cassie: Nooo, it was a joke, I'm joking! Sub-Zero! Wake up, Kuai or Liang or whatever your name is! Grandmaster, you have to finish the test!/ □ – I can't have children. □ – I'm too young/old to be a father.

The Test Ends Here.

According to your answers, the perfect woman for you is .. *drumrolls* .. Cassandra Cage!

This test was brought to you by your friendly Earthrealm protector Raiden, The Thunder God. Thank you for participating.

Is there anything you'd like to add?

Sub-Zero: To be honest, I'm curious to see what the answers of the rest would be.

Cassie, undressing: I can show you mine right now.

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