#carlos knew tk was his soulmate knew meeting tk had helped him stop feeling broken

[theghostofashton]

one of the moments that always gets me in 2x12 is carlos pausing, as tk's urging him to jump out the window and promising he'll be behind. he says later he didn't think they'd make it out. so he pauses and turns back and tries to think, amidst his panic, of what to say. i love you? you've changed my life in ways i didn't think were possible? you're my soulmate? thank you, for everything. and in that moment he can't, because those words don't happen like this. one moment he's kissing down tk's neck and the next his house is on fire and he's going to lose everything, including this one person who changed everything for him. who gave him something he didn't even know he was missing until he had it. this was definitely not their first 'i love you' and he knows those words are for the quiet moments, when they're laying in bed together, or shouted across the room as one of them leaves for work, or murmured into each other's skin as they're cooking or cuddling or grocery shopping. not when the house is on fire and they may not make it out. and carlos is so stunned and panicked and he can't bring himself to get the words out but he also can't say nothing, can't let their last moments together (if these are that) be like this.