#caption is a line from write me letters by hot freaks

[arovalentines]

write me letters ink on paper

[bittysvalentines]

from @parrishsrubberplant to @rhysiana Happy belated Valentine's Day!

The man’s plain white t-shirt does wonderful things for his chest. And arms. And abs.

“Wow,” Brittany whispers to Jen.

Brittany says ‘wow’ about a customer eleven times a day. Jen is a good friend who looks every time.

“Wow,” Jen dutifully agrees. She can’t argue with Brittany about men. She’s a lesbian so Brittany automatically disregards her opinion. But her vision is fine, and this dude is jacked. He’s at least six feet tall, with a swoop of perfectly styled brown hair and sky-blue eyes.

She expects him to walk on by, to menswear or shoes or whatever. Then Jen will listen to twenty minutes of Brittany sighing over him.

Instead, Tall and Handsome stops. He hesitates and then heads over to the makeup counter.

Brittany blushes under her makeup and shoots Jen a look that is equal parts panic and glee. Jen rolls her eyes.

“Hi,” Jen says. “Can we help you?”

“Uh, yeah,” he says. “I’m looking for eyeliner?”

He doesn’t look like the type of guy who would wear guyliner. Eyeliner, Jen corrects herself. If he wanted guyliner, he would have asked for guyliner. Don’t make assumptions about people.

“Any particular brand?” Jen can hear Brittany having a heart attack behind her.

“Um.” He reaches into the back pocket of his tight jeans, and hands her a tube. “Something like this?”

The black tube has worn silver lettering. Jen turns the tube in her hands, looking at the faded hieroglyphs that might have once been a ‘W’ and an ‘S’.

“It’s discontinued,” he says. “I was hoping you might have some left.”

Brittany finally recovers. “Um, that’s the WorldStar Mega Vanta, right?” She doesn’t wait for an answer. She’s never wrong about brands. It’s like her secret super power.

“I can check in the back, but I don’t think we have any.” Brittany looks at Jen. “Or, Jen can.” She smiles at him.

Tall and Handsome tips his head down, and angles his chin, his blue eyes disappointed. He angles his body towards her, cutting Brittany out of the conversation. If she were straight, she’d swoon.

“Do you know of anything like it?” He says.

Brittany folds her arms and leaves to check the back, her shoulders held in a stiff line.

Jen frowns. “I really don’t. That was the brand that was like, a liquid marker but it applied like a pencil, right? It sucks they stopped making it.”

He nods. “I’ve got one more tube left. I’m hoping maybe I can try some stuff and find something like it.”

“Excuse me?”

Jen freezes. Goth Girl steps out from behind Tall and Handsome.

Where is Brittany when Jen needs her?

Goth Girl is adorable, and she comes to the makeup counter every week. Jen’s tiny gay heart cannot handle the glory that is Goth Girl. She’s short, with curly black hair and perfect makeup. The wings of her eyeliner end in points sharp enough to stab. Today, she’s wearing a lacy black shirt and combat boots. Jen cannot.

Tall and Handsome--Jen almost thinks she recognizes him--shifts to include Goth Girl in their conversation.

“You were talking about WorldStar Mega, right?” she asks.

“Yeah,” he says.

“I have a friend who makes stuff,” Goth Girl says. “They have an Etsy store. If you wanted, I could give you their store name. It isn’t a perfect match, but their black eyeliner is a lot like the Vanta if you just make a thick enough line.”

He already has his phone out. “Could you? That would be amazing.”

Goth Girl tells him the name, and Jen writes it down for herself on the back of a discarded receipt. She likes the WorldStar eyeliners too. Tall and Handsome has good taste.

“Thank you,” he says, and holds his hand out to Goth Girl. “I’m Gabriel.”

Goth Girl takes his hand. “Julissa.”

She looks like she has a firm handshake.

He turns, smiling, to Jen. “Gabriel.”

She gestures to her nametag and waves awkwardly. “I’m Jen.”  Lovesick Jen, trying desperately not to stare at Julissa.

Julissa walks away to look at the display of lotions on sale.

Gabriel smiles at Jen. He’s missing a front tooth. “Do you work on commision?” he says. “I’d feel bad if I don’t at least buy something from you.”

“That’s...really sweet of you,” Jen says. She’s never had a customer ask that before. “We don’t.”

“Well, you’ve been really nice and helpful,” he says. “I should buy something.”

“Well, do you have a girlfriend?” Jen asks. She thinks of Brittany, who hasn’t come back yet. She may have just decided to take her break early. Or she’s still dying of embarrassment. Jen knows Goth Girl’s name now; she can do Brittany a solid.

He shakes his head. “My tea--my friends’ partners are really into these travel eyeshadow pallets?”

She takes him to a display of dull gold-colored eyeshadow cases. “These?”

He checks the name. “Yeah.” He peers at the descriptions. “Martine has...light brown skin, so this one would probably look best with her. And Yudita is very pale, so I think this one, and…”

He picks out eye shadow for at least six different women. Jen tries not to let her eyes bug out. This brand of eyeshadow is not cheap. She carries the pile to the register.

“Your buddies aren’t going to care that you bought their partners stuff?”

He shakes his head. “Not really. And--hey, I just thought of this. Can you ring them up separate? That way I can include the receipts so they can return them if they want to.”

What, Jen thinks. I’ve fallen through a portal to another dimension and not realized it. Or another planet. Who is this man?

She rings him up six times. Tall and Handsome smiles one last time at her and leaves. Jen wishes she did work on commission. She would have just made a killing.

And now Julissa is standing at the register.

“Hey,” Jen says. Her voice creaks.

Julissa smiles. She looks down at the counter, then back up at Jen. She looks shy. Her eyes dart to the back door where Brittany disappeared, over to a display of lip glosses, and back to Jen.

“Just this,” Julissa says. It’s a tube of berry purple lipstick, made by one of the brands that lasts forever and stays on through any kind of mischief.

After Julissa signs her receipt she hesitates. “Can I give you my number?”

Jen goes red. “Yeah.”

The corner of Julissa’s mouth curls up in a wicked grin. She pushes the receipt back towards Jen. Below her signature is ten digits. Jen catches herself smiling back.

*           *           *

Ari does not understand.

They fell asleep yesterday after spending hours packing orders, receipts, business cards, and sparkly star stickers into envelopes. They were really looking forward to taking day off. Maybe going for a walk in the park, feeling the sunlight on their skin. Something like that.

Instead, their inbox appears to have exploded.

They stare at the computer screen in disbelief. They have forty-five new orders.

“I need coffee,” Ari tells their cat. Marmot blinks slowly. Ari blinks slowly back.

They fill the electric kettle, spoon coffee grounds into the French press, and stare blankly at their phone. They have a lot of text messages.

Ari sends a quick text to Julissa. I think I might not be able to meet up today. Sorry. They pour the hot water into the French press and set the timer for three minutes. Then they turn to their messages.

They open the thread from Julissa and scroll back. I’m so sorry, Julissa wrote. I think this is my fault. I told someone about your eyeliner and… There’s a link to an instagram page. Ari opens the link.

It’s the Insta of someone named Gabriel “Snowy” Snöröken, who is dark-haired and Nordic and beautiful--and an NHL goalie for the Providence Falconers.

Okay, Ari thinks, but what does this have to do with me?

Ari finds the answer as he scrolls through ‘Snowy’s’ posts. One post is a selfie. Snowy focuses on the upper part of his face, head tipped forward. His eyes appear closed. He sports thick lines of black eyeliner.

Goalie superstitions! The caption reads. I freaked out when WorldStar stopped making Mega Vanta. But I think I found something better. Shutout last night. Thanks, @AriSparkles!

He includes a link to Ari’s Etsy store.

Oh.

Ari barely hears the timer going off. They pour coffee, add creamer, take sip. It’s just on the right side of too bitter. Marmot brushes against their ankles, making them jump. Ari bends down and scratches Marmot behind the ear. The cat purrs.

“What am I going to do?” Ari asks Marmot. They don’t expect the cat to answer.

What Ari wants to do is yell at Snowy to take the post down. Ari does not need this stress in their life. Not when they’re navigating  suppliers, making sure all the ingredients are certified cruelty-free, and packaging and mailing everything themselves.

Marmot is absolutely wonderful, the best cat in the word, but Marmot doesn’t have opposable thumbs.

Ari drinks more coffee and checks their inbox again. They’ve gotten three more orders.

Without thinking much about it, they post a quick update on Insta. Thanks ‘Snowy’ for the shout-out! Glad you like our eyeliner. Friends, it’s just me here and with the recent spate of orders things may be a little slower than normal. Thanks for your patience and your business!

Ari’s hands are shaking as they put down the phone. They text Julissa: Help.

Even with Julissa pinch-hitting, it takes Ari almost all day to make it through the recent orders. And that’s just printing labels, sorting products, and counting out the sparkly stickers.

“Hey,” Julissa says.

It takes Ari too long to look up.

“Yeah?”

“Have you thought of just asking Snowy to take down the link?”

Ari grabs Marmot and pulls the cat onto their lap. “No.”

“Why not?” Julissa grabs the two empty mugs and heads for the kitchen. She comes back with a mug full of cold water for Ari.

“I couldn’t,” Ari says. “He’d think I’m an ungrateful brat.”

“Well, then,” Julissa says, and pulls out her phone.

“What are you doing--no, don’t!” Ari lunges. Julissa leans back, pulling the phone out of their reach. “C’mon, Juli, please--” Ari gets their hands on Julissa’s phone and pulls it away from her.

Ari looks at the phone and laughs. “Oooh, Mall Girl. You’ve been texting Mall Girl?”

Julissa hits them. “Why are you like this?”

“You love me,” Ari says. “But seriously, Mall Girl? If you have her number, don’t you know her name?”

“Jen,” Julissa mutters. Ari’s distracted by laughing again, and Julissa takes advantage of their distraction to pull the phone out of their hands. “I’m doing it,” she says.

 “No,” Ari whines.

 “Bro,” Julissa says. “ It has been one day. You are super stressed, and you are only going to get more stressed, and then the semester is going to start. I would rather you feel temporarily embarrassed than be in trouble a month out.”

Ari covers their face with their hands.

“I’ll send it from my Insta,” Julissa says. “Since I actually met him.”

Ari groans incoherently.

“Done,” Julissa says a minute later.

“It went through?”

“No, it sent as a request.”

“Bro,” Ari groans. “He probably gets like, hundreds of requests a day. I have looked at his Insta. He’s a professional athlete with the body of a god.”

“So we’ll make scrambled eggs, and watch terrible TV, and wait,” Julissa says.

“And you’ll tell me what’s going on with Jen,” Ari says. “I mean, Mall Girl.”

Julissa smacks them.

*           *           *

Julissa left an hour ago. Ari checks their phone one last time before bed.

They have a DM from Snowy. Hello! Julissa says I stressed you out. Sorry!

Ari resists the urge to roll over and scream into their cat. No worries, Ari writes back. No worries, ha, Ari is literally full of worries.

Can I make it up to you? Are you a hockey fan?

Ari looks around for Marmot. The cat perches on the arm of the sofa, front paws tucked under her. “What do you think?” Ari asks their cat. Marmot blinks.

Yes, Ari writes back.

I really like your store, Snowy says. How did you start doing that?

It’s kind of a long story. Ari thinks about suggesting it’s a story better told in person, but they aren’t a puck bunny.

Ari puts the phone down and scritches the top of Marmot’s head. When they pick the phone back up there’s one more message: I’d love to hear it, if you’re free some time.

[theinternetcultureproject]

A thesis on memes by reddit user cosmic daddy_ (WARNING: Long Post is Long)

...

Remember Longcat? I remember Longcat. Screw whatever we're supposed to be talking about, I want to talk about Longcat. Memes were simpler back then, in 2006. They stood for something. And that something was nothing. Memes just were. “Longcat is long.” An undeniably true, self-reflexive statement. Water is wet, fire is hot, Longcat is long. Memes were floating signifiers without signifieds, meaningful in their meaninglessness. Nobody made memes, they just arose through spontaneous generation; Athena being birthed, fully formed, from her own skull.

You could talk about them around the proverbial water cooler, taking comfort in their absurdity: “Hey, Johnston, have you seen the picture of that cat? They call it Longcat because it’s long!”

“Ha ha, sounds like good fun, Stevenson! That reminds me, I need to show you this webpage I found the other day; it contains numerous animated dancing hamsters. It’s called — you’ll never believe this — hamsterdance!” And then Johnston and Stevenson went on to have a wonderful friendship based on the comfortable banality of self-evident digitized animals.

But then 2007 came, and along with it came I Can Has, and everything was forever ruined. It was hubris, people. We did it to ourselves. The minute we added written language beyond the reflexive, it all went to hell. Suddenly memes had an excess of information to be parsed. It wasn’t just a picture of a cat, perhaps with a simple description appended to it; now the cat spoke to us via a written caption on the picture itself. It referred to an item of food that existed in our world but not in the world of the meme, rupturing the boundary between the two. The cat wanted something. Which forced us to recognize that what it wanted was us, was our attention. WE are the cheezburger, and we always were. But by the time we realized this, it was too late. We were slaves to the very memes that we had created. We toiled to earn the privilege of being distracted by them. They fiddled while Rome burned, and we threw ourselves into the fire so that we might listen to the music. The memes had us. Or, rather, they could has us.

And it just got worse from there. Soon the cats had invisible bicycles and played keyboards. They gained complex identities, and so we hollowed out our own identities to accommodate them. We prayed to return to the simple days when we would admire a cat for its exceptional length alone, the days when the cat itself was the meme and not merely a vehicle for the complex memetic text. And the fact that this text was so sparse, informal, and broken ironically made it even more demanding. The intentional grammatical and syntactical flaws drew attention to themselves, making the meme even more about the captioning words and less about the pictures. Words, words, words. Wurds werds wordz. Stumbling through a crooked, dead-end hallway of a mangled clause describing a simple feline sentiment was a torture that we inflicted on ourselves daily. Let’s not forget where the word “caption” itself comes from: capio, Latin for both “I understand” and “I capture.” We thought that by captioning the memes, we were understanding them. Instead, our captions allowed them to capture us. The memes that had once been a cure for our cultural ills were now the illness itself.

It goes right back to the Phaedrus, really. Think about it. Back in the innocent days of 2006, we naïvely thought that the grapheme had subjugated the phoneme, that the belief in the primacy of the spoken word was an ancient and backwards folly on par with burning witches or practicing phrenology or thinking that Smash Mouth was good. Freakin' Smash Mouth. But we were wrong. About the phoneme, I mean. Theuth came to us again, this time in the guise of a grinning grey cat. The cat hungered, and so did Theuth. He offered us an updated choice, and we greedily took it, oblivious to the consequences. To borrow the parlance of an ex-contemporary meme, he baked us a pharmakon, and we eated it.

Pharmakon, φάρμακον, the Greek word that means both “poison” and “cure,” but, because of the limitations of the English language, can only be translated one way or the other depending on the context and the translator’s whims. No possible translation can capture the full implications of a Greek text including this word. In the Phaedrus, writing is the pharmakon that the trickster god Theuth offers, the toxin and remedy in one. With writing, man will no longer forget; but he will also no longer think. A double-edged (s)word, if you will. But the new iteration of the pharmakon is the meme. Specifically, the post-I-Can-Has memescape of 2007 onward. And it was the language that did it, you see. The addition of written language twisted the remedy into a poison, flipped the pharmakon on its invisible axis.

In retrospect, it was in front of our eyes all along. Meme. The noxious word was given to us by who else but those wily ancient Greeks themselves. μίμημα, or mīmēma. Defined as an imitation, a copy. The exact thing Plato warned us against in the Republic. Remember? The simulacrum that is two steps removed from the perfection of the original by the process of — note the root of the word — mimesis. The Platonic ideal of an object is the source: the father, the sun, the ghostly whole. The corporeal manifestation of the object is one step removed from perfection. The image of the object (be it in letters or in pigments) is two steps removed. The author is inferior to the craftsman is inferior to God.

But we’ll go farther than Plato. Longcat, a photograph, is a textbook example of a second-degree mimesis. (We might promote it to the third degree since the image on the internet is a digital copy of the original photograph of the physical cat which is itself a copy of Platonic ideal of a cat - a Godcat, if you will - but this line of thought doesn’t change anything in the argument.) The text-supplemented meme, on the other hand, the captioned cat, is at an infinite remove from the Godcat, the ultimate mimesis, copying the copy of itself eternally, the written language and the image echoing off each other, until it finally loops back around to the truth by virtue of being so far from it. It becomes its own truth, the fidelity of the eternal copy. It becomes a God.

Writing itself is the archetypical pharmakon and the archetypical copy, if you’ll come back with me to the Phaedrus (if we ever really left it). Speech is the real deal, Socrates says, with a smug little wink to his (written) dialogic buddy. Speech is alive, it can defend itself, it can adapt and change. Writing is its bastard son, the mimic, the dead, rigid simulacrum. Writing is a copy, a mīmēma, of truth in speech. To return to our analogous issue: the image of the cheezburger cat, the copy of the picture-copy-copy, is so much closer to the original Platonic ideal than the written language that accompanies it. (“Pharmakon” can also mean “paint.” Think about it, man. Just think about it.) The image is still fake, but it’s the caption on the cat that is the downfall of the republic, the real fakeness, which is both realer and faker than whatever original it is that it represents.

Men and gods abhor the lie, Plato says in sections 382 a and b of the Republic:

“οὐκ οἶσθα, ἦν δ᾽ ἐγώ, ὅτι τό γε ὡς ἀληθῶς ψεῦδος, εἰ οἷόν τε τοῦτο εἰπεῖν, πάντες θεοί τε καὶ ἄνθρωποι μισοῦσιν; πῶς, ἔ��η, λέγεις; οὕτως, ἦν δ᾽ ἐγώ, ὅτι τῷ κυριωτάτῳ που ἑαυτῶν ψεύδεσθαι καὶ περὶ τὰ κυριώτατα οὐδεὶς ἑκὼν ἐθέλει, ἀλλὰ πάντων μάλιστα φοβεῖται ἐκεῖ αὐτὸ κεκτῆσθαι.

[‘Don’t you know,’ said I, ‘that the veritable lie, if the expression is permissible, is a thing that all gods and men abhor?’

‘What do you mean?’ he said. ‘This,’ said I, ‘that falsehood in the most vital part of themselves, and about their most vital concerns, is something that no one willingly accepts, but it is there above all that everyone fears it.’]”

Man’s worst fear is that he will hold existential falsehood within himself. And the verbal lies that he tells are a copy of this feared dishonesty in the soul. Plato goes on to elaborate: “the falsehood in words is a copy of the affection in the soul, an after-rising image of it and not an altogether unmixed falsehood.” A copy of man’s false internal copy of truth. And what word does Plato use for “copy” in this sentence? That’s effing right, μίμημα. Mīmēma. Mimesis. Meme. The new meme is a lie, manifested in (written) words, that reflects the lack of truth, the emptiness, within the very soul of a human. The meme is now not only an inferior copy, it is a deceptive copy.

But just wait, it gets better. Plato continues in the very next section of the Republic, 382 c. Sometimes, he says, the lie, the meme, is appropriate, even moral. It is not abhorrent to lie to your enemy, or to your friend in order to keep him from harm. “Does it [the lie] not then become useful to avert the evil—as a medicine?” You get one freaking guess for what Greek word is being translated as “medicine” in this passage. Ding ding goddang ding, you got it, φάρμακον, pharmakon. The μίμημα is a φάρμακον, the lie is a medicine/poison, the meme is a pharmakon.

But I’m sure that by now you’ve realized the (intentional) mistake in my argument that brought us to this point. I said earlier that the addition of written language to the meme flipped the pharmakon on its axis. But the pharmakon didn’t flip, it doesn’t have an axis. It was always both remedy and poison. The fact that this isn’t obvious to us from the very beginning of the discussion is the fault of, you guessed it, language. The initial lie (writing) clouds our vision and keeps us from realizing how false the second-order lie (the meme) is.

The very structure of the lying meme mirrors the structure of the written word that defines and corrupts it. Once you try to identify an “outside” in order to reveal the lie, the whole framework turns itself inside-out so that you can never escape it. The cat wants the cheezburger that exists outside the meme, but only through the meme do we become aware of the presumed existence of the cheezburger — we can’t point out the absurdity of the world of the meme without also indicting our own world. We can’t talk about language without language, we can’t meme without mimesis. Memes didn’t change between ‘06 and ‘07, it was us who changed. Or rather, our understanding of what we had always been changed. The lie became truth, the remedy became the poison, the outside became the inside. Which is to say that the truth became lie, the pharmakon was always the remedy and the poison, and the inside retreated further inside. It all came full circle. Because here’s the secret. Language ruined the meme, yes. But language itself had already been ruined. By that initial poisonous, lying copy. Writing.

The First Meme.

Language didn’t attack the meme in 2007 out of spite. It attacked it to get revenge.

Longcat is long. Language is language. Pharmakon is pharmakon. The phoneme topples the grapheme, witches ride through the night, our skulls hide secret messages on their surfaces, Smash Mouth is good after all. Hey now, you’re an all-star. Get your game on.

Go play.

[swearronchanel]

I rewatched 5.09 aka The 2016 Christmas Special

I officially have done nothing productive all day. I did finish rewatching The Nanny though if that counts 😂😂 I forgot how much it made me laugh. Anyway I’m randomly in the mood to watch the 2016 Christmas special so why not post? Btw this will be long af  this IS incredibly long but I just had so many thoughts ya’ know?

Ah I’m excited again, this was such a great special don’t @ me

The Turners! ANGELA’S LITTLE NURSE UNIFORM 😭💕 SO PRECIOUS

SHELAGH LOOKING LIKE A BABE😍

TRIXIE looking a babe 😍 she assisted in the cesarean.. later she’ll do it herself ahh

I want to have Christmas dinner at Nonnatus aww

“To absent friends"💔 my freaking heart breaks, sister MJ’s face! ugh she misses sister Evangelina. But don’t we all?

More cute Angela not talking as usual (still waiting for a word)

I want Trixie’s Christmas outfit, I want all her clothes though 😍

WE OUT TO SOUTH AFRICA

# LETS GET IT 1962

rip to sister felicity tho

More Shelagh being flawless, like yes Laura Main is so gorgeous don’t sleep on it

”God moves in a mysterious manner" lol shelagh I just love u don’t ever change

“Our own son had polio once” yes use guilt to make your point & get ur way

take notes people

“What you did I did, where you go I go..” excuse me while my heart fucking melts 😭😭

I remember watching this Christmas Day & my mom and I did the same sigh and “aww” expression at that line

She loves the show and is going to be shook when she watches series 6 lol

Also like Shelagh’s dress is so cute I’m here for it

Lmaoo I was wondering for so long beforehand why tf they brought Fred?? They Need those engineering skills apparently  

CMON BABY DO THE LOCOMOTION 💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

Yess the music is lit

Trixie’s turquoise dress 👌🏻👌🏻 I want it

Tims leg braces! I actually noticed them and was lowkey proud because I rarely notice shit in the background

More Shelagh being adorable, as always

Get those vaccinations💉💉 f*ck shots though lmao I hate them

What is Patrick whispering to Shelagh? 👀👀

That’s almost right up there with what in the actual fuck did he write in those letters to get her to ditch the habit and wimple 😉😏😉 NO BUT FOR REAL WHAT DID HE SAY? We’ll never know *sigh*

I’m here for everything Trixie wears lets be real

LOL SISTER JULIENNE BASICALLY TELLING BABS SHE CANT BE FOOLING AROUND WITH HER MAN OVERSEAS

don’t even argue that she’s making a big deal with any of that “he’s a vicar, she’s a vicar’s daughter, they don’t believe in premarital sex” either cause they were making out in public before and he was grabbing her ass in a CONVENT Lmaooo (good for him he’s not letting god stop him😂) jk I’m going to hell for all the jokes I’ve made through out this show anyway

I feel though, so im letting them live

But still the married couple barely touch each other 😂 so I’m a little salty *pretend there’s a salt shaker emoji* Fu*k it though

Also Patsy and Delia have been together for a while and haven’t kissed either as far as I remember

BEATRIX FRANKLIN SLAYING AS ALWAYS 😍😍 love her coat and glasses and everything she is

And yikes that swimsuit babs lol

There’s Patsy! With the horrible horrible wig :/

Sister MJ with the Christmas cake 😭😭 aye bendito she just wants to share it

How rich with alcohol is it sister? Pass it over

By guys🙋🏼 we out this Bitch ✈️🚢

The music makes me so happy 😭❣️

“Look at you Barbara! brussel sprout green” Lmaoo ew I hate Brussel sprouts and also throwing up in general😂 sorry babs you’re gross rn

Legit I have not thrown up since I was like 8, I refuse to let myself 😭😂and 3 semesters in to university and lots of parties and drinks I’ve never actually thrown up (been pretty close though haha) *knocks on wood so I don’t jinx it*

I love Phyllis. Have I said that yet??

“..do you have anything to stop my mascara from running” lol I am Trixie

but was there no waterproof mascara yet?

uh oh here comes the asshole sergeant (I think it’s the same guy as later on?), and Tom is so reasonable lol

 Shelagh’s hat with the flowers lol, but yes her cute summer dress love it, glad she only took one cardigan 😂

Lol when the sergeant tells Trixie don’t smile 😂😂

yes Dr Myra pulled up, I thought she was kinda bitchy at first and still kinda do but she’s tough and badass so I’m here for it

“I can see the caption now, English Roses dash African Skies exclamation mark!” .. “this is a new camera” LOL AGAIN PHYLLIS IS A GEM I LOVE HER SHE’S SO FUNNY

And again Trixie’s dress, it’s so pretty I want it😭😭

And again I’m Trixie, talking about needing a face mask 😂

lol Babs you smell like grajo 😂

Phyllis sniffing her 😂 “you’ve had enough barley sugar and sympathy”

The spider 😂 I don’t like spiders so I relate lol & Barbara killing it and coming at Phyllis with the clapback “there’s venom on it and some backbone”

Why do I find the linen habits funny?

Aw Shelagh “it’s at times like this I wonder what would Sister Evangelina do” I’m so glad she brought her up

Rip sister E 😰

I feel like Patrick would still feel hot in that linen suit, like it’s still a suit lol? same with the nuns but like they have no other choice

Alright I’ll give Dr Myra that though asking about radium treatment was naive of Patrick

Fred is so funny though 😂 leaving his mark by shaving lol

Throwback to Shelagh’s og bri nylon nightgown’s first appearance 😉  

“What’s all this” LOL about to be the cause of this miraculous conception that’s what 😂

“It’s made of a new material called bri nylon..” Shelagh is so cute and genuinely wanting to explain 💕

Lol like cmon u know Patrick probably doesn’t give a fuck and is gonna take it off

Of course Trixie would be mad she didn’t get to set her hair

“That hat covers a multitude of sins” that’s legit one of my fav Barbara lines 😂😂

Shelagh is the only one who brought the belt to her uniform because she’s Shelagh & has to look calm, cool, collected and professional lol

Phyllis’s kink: rolodex systems 📇

lol I really do like Dr Myra, making Patrick feel dumb and I don’t care

“..and they live in a society that is gradually stripping them of any dignity or freedoms they ever had..” again I like Dr Myra a lot. I didn’t really think she had a white savior complex as some people thought because she wasn’t trying to change anything just to help. She even says later on she does it for their need not her beliefs

Proud of Babs for learning xhosa phrases 

Just watching this man run makes me tired & he has like tb right? yup

LOL PHYLLIS IS LIKE DO I LOOK SCARED? kicking Fred out the drivers side 😂

“I’m all for persistence in the face of adversity” I loved this scene between Trixie and Roza 😭💕 too bad I didn’t know I was gonna end up sobbing later

Did the nurses and everyone know how bad Apartheid was?

“We have to bloom where we are planted” VANESSA REDGRAVE SAID A VARIATION OF THIS IN THE SERIES 2 CHRISTMAS SPECIAL WHEN MY BBY SHELAGH WAS GETTING READY BEFORE THE WEDDING I REMEMBER  

Damn tho Dr Myra didn’t have to yell at the lady :/

THE SCENERY THOUGH, I WANT TO GO TO SOUTH AFRICA

Phyllis learned some xhosa too and im not surprised, she does it all

“Do you have the means to protect this mother and myself” no, “Then I don’t wish to hear anymore about it” PHYLLIS IS HARDCORE SHE DOES NOT GIVE ANY SHITS I LOVE IT

Aw Tom watching babs with the baby

lol I’m not ready for them to have a kid so I hope they wait a series at least

“NURSE BUCKLE” im cryin laughing 😂 I need more of the Phyllis and Fred dynamic

She just had a baby IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE, YES THE MOTHERS ARE HEROINES

“Hells teeth” lol Patrick tried to make hells bells a thing but we know it can’t compare

Trixie serving another look, but whats new? But yes girl you watch those c-sections you’re up to the plate soon!

Haha she’s gonna teach Babs how to smoke

“They aren’t good for you, and the pair of you should know that” YES PHYLLIS WHY DOESNT TRIXIE KNOW OR CARE?

LOL SISTER WINIFRED we know you’re a red head

Idc, sister W used to smoke. I know it 😂 she was living it up before joining the order and lowkey while she’s been a nun, I just want to know her real name?

Of course Shelagh is worried about the lack of records but aye there’s the dress from 6.03 that magically fit even though her uniform didn’t 🙃?

“Typhoo, we brought it with us” YES I HAVE IT & I KNOW WHAT IT IS NOW & CAN RELATE

This scene with Roza & Constance & the nurses + sister W was so sweet I loved it 💕

“Why you should never be sorry, just be glad” 😭😭 there must be something in my eye that’s why it’s watery

Lol aw Trixie saying sister Winifred don’t go yet

Sister Winifred dancing 😂 go to compline

I lowkey have the sister Bernadette unhappy with being a nun vibes from sister Winifred except she’s never really unhappy? You get me? Like she’s annoyingly enthusiastic (in a cute way) most of the time but you can tell she wants to do thing nuns can’t do

“I just want to get it started so I can run him over”  DO IT FRED ILL GIVE U $5

“I’m here on a missionary basis, I’m trying not to think uncharitable thoughts” LOL DONT WORRY TOM, SHELAGH’s GOT YOU COVERED

“I’m perfectly happy to think them for you” and she pushes her glasses up 😂 I LOVE The sas. I love her. & then Patrick is like “that’s my girl” & it’s cute af

Dr Myra you’re in pain, I see you

LMAO SHE MAD THAT SISTER FELICITY DIED LIKE SHE MADE THE CHOICE?

“I don’t believe in any of that” how do you tell a nun you don’t believe in God lol?

CHURCH LIT 💃🏼👏🏼

SHELAGH & SISTER WINIFRED TRYING TO COPY THEIR DANCE IS THE CUTEST THING 😭

All of them in the back of the truck is  the second cutest thing 😭✨

I cherish the two seconds Shelagh and Trixie sat next to each other 😭 I just want them to be friends!! give me a cute scene between them pls, I won’t stop asking till I get one

yikes @ the water, STILL RELEVANT IN 2017! even in the US in flint

THE ELEPHANTS! ah love it. I want to go on an African safari 😭 guess I have to settle for the fake on in Disney’s Animal Kingdom.. it’s lit though I won’t lie

Mathias and Able 💔💔 and Patrick explaining “man to man”

“All medicine is good, usually” UGH THE THALIDOMIDE

No Dr Myra!!

It’s not liver cancer!! Ah now to wait till they realize

“There’s never no hope at all Patrick, it’s 1962” YES SHELAGH, THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE. ESPECIALLY CAUSE YOU’RE HAVING A FREAKING BABY, #LETSGETIT1962

Don’t worry Tom, leave it to the pros. Sister Julienne is gonna handle Mr Stark(e)?

SHELAGH WITH THE GOATS IM DEAD, why is she scared of goats but delivered fucking piglets in series 1? I’d be more scared of pigs?

Shelagh talking to sister MJ on the phone 😭💕 THEYRE BOTH PRECIOUS

fuck it’s Roza, brb im gonna cry now

😰😰💔💔 phantom pregnancy

Trixie hurting me more

beach time 🌞🌞

SHELAGH TURNER AKA SISTER BERNADETTE SERVING LOOKS ON THE BEACH. I’ve seen this 3 times and I’m still shook like The hat, the swimsuit, the sunglasses, I am d e a d once again😍😍 when will your fav ever??  She’s sunburnt and still killing it

LOL spicy sausage.. 

Phyllis in trousers >>

Also Phyllis had her camera where are the photos when they get back?

BEATRIX FRANKLIN SLAYING IN the black two piece and clubmasters AGAIN, when will your fav ever?

HOW DO I GET TO LOOK LIKE THAT? 😭😭😍😍

How am I so attached to Trixie and Shelagh’s characters like wtf?? Everything they do and say and wear, I’m just shook all the time. It’s not normal

Like Laura Main and Helen George could literally punch me in the face and I’d thank them

Why did Barbara get so mad on the beach with Tom? I feel the stress was real but damn

lol shoutout to everyone on Tumblr for pointing out that Shelagh and Patrick were being cute in the corner watching the sunset or whatever

I loved this scene between Tom and Trixie💕

MY BBY HAS COME SO FAR, SHE’S GROWN AND SHE IS THRIVING. LIKE SHE’S ABOUT TO PERFORM A DAMN C-SECTION 😭

also she looks so beautiful, I want to look like that ah😍

Shelagh with the picture of Tim and Angela 😭💔💔

THEN SHE TOOK IS TO THE HOSPITAL UGH, so glad that is over it was too much

“I knew that yearning once, I was lucky because it left me when we adopted our daughter..” UGH CRYIN AND NOW SHE’S HAVING A BABY ANYWAY

BUT I LOVED THIS SCENE AS WELL

Shelagh is understanding & not judgmental of Dr Myra and I just love seeing her nursing & well I love everything she does but I’m so glad she had such great screen time

FRED DOING THE HAND MOTIONS FOR WHAT TOM WAS SAYING LMAO

“Medicine isn’t about doing what’s easy, it’s about doing what’s essential” yes Patrick, we have come full circle

there’s always a moment when I watch ctm and I’m like “I should’ve tried to become a nurse” then I’m like LOL NAH. The nursing program is so intense at my university I wouldn’t pass it anyway 😂

my mother’s a nurse though, I’ll leave it to her. After watching this episode it reminded her of how she always wanted to do a mission trip or like nurses without boarders and was trying to tell my dad she still wants to go 😂

too bad I’ve ruined her plans because my university’s tuition is ungodly & I didn’t get one damn scholarship

“No anesthesia” DR MYRA IS NO JOKE, kick ass woman.

Patrick, Shelagh and Sister J aka the dream team

How did they fake this? So crazy

“When people have no love to live for, it’s so very easy to fill that void with hate” 💔💔 something is in my eye again😭

“ Look where we ended up” “WE HAVEN’T ENDED UP ANYWHERE..and I’m not going to say anything else because I’m afraid I may speak sharply and no matter how high the stakes you don’t deserve that” HELL YEA SHELAGH, I’m so proud.

Sister W casually trying to not look at the handsome but sweaty Tom

Oh shit Dr Myra’s down

CORRA SHELAGH

Shelagh holding the umbrella and laying in the back with Dr Myra >>

Now Constance’s going into labor

Mr Stark I know you think you have a reason to be an asshole but wtf she’s a nun? Like you don’t even feel slightly disrespectful?

“I know what is it to have nothing but a photograph or two..” UGH THAT EPISODE WITH SISTED J’S OLD BOYFRIEND KILLED ME

I love Sister Julienne, I hope we can see hear more of her past.

Lol pbs cut that scene of Babs singing but why?

“Then we have no choice. We have to operate ourselves.” YOU CAN DO IT TRIXIE

the first time watching this my anxiety was on 1000

Phyllis tying up Trixie’s gown up like they’re suiting up for battle

I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS AND IM STILL NERVOUS

THE BABY IS STUCK LIKE I WOULDVE FREAKED TF OUT

this is also why I won’t be a nurse or doctor lol, I’m always panicking

BABS PUSH THE BABY BACK UP

AYE GRACIAS DIOS, ALL IS WELL

“Well done Trixie, I couldn’t be more proud of you” 😭💕 me either

Yea I say you earned a cigarette

Better late than never to make amends I guess, but get that clean water going asap no rocky

The Turners are back 👏🏼

THE CAKE TIN 😭😭

& Able and Mathias 😭😭

Aw Tom proposing ☺️ I don’t really feel anything for them as a couple but this was a cute moment 😭

SHELAGH AND PATRICK GIVING TIM’S LEG BRACES TO MATHIAS AH MY HEART

And they got the water 😭

I LIED BEFORE EVERYONE JUMPING UNDER THE WATER PUMP IS THE CUTEST THING😭💕👏🏼✨

“Not all gifts come tied in ribbons, or at a special time of year. Some blessings surprise us arriving unlabeled and we embrace them in a blaze of joy” DAMN IT VANNESSA IM CRYIN THANKS (also now it seems like foreshadow for baby Turner)

Roza as secretary!! My heart again

I bet Trixie took over like a badass while Dr Myra was recovering

THE GOATS HAHA

PHYLLIS TAKING ALL THOSE PHOTO’S AT THE END IS THE GREATEST PART 😭💖 IM SO HAPPY AND MY HEART GROWS LIKE THE GRINCH EVERY TIME I WATCH THIS SHOW

LOL THE NUNS GOT PHOTOBOMBED BY A CHICKEN

AND CUE REDGRAVE

“But though they’d given their labor and their love, they also took and they learned and they went home wiser, enriched in ways they could not count”

The End 😭😭💕💕😰😰

Ugh I don’t care, that special was spectacular and I loved every minute.

[arovalentines]

watch it all go by