#candace minutes are complicated because we all know that she can take over at any moment

[secondary-analog-interface]

One thing that needs to change after olympic break is Ruthy minutes. She was the best player when Candace, Allie and Stef were out and for her to only get 4 minutes is just horrible. I think minute management as a whole needs to improve. Ruthy and Allie need to play more, Sloot, Allie and Stef need to play more together, players need to be sat when they're not playing well and players need to play 25+ minutes when they're playing well

yeah, like, I know it's hard to get her too many minutes when stef is having a good night offensively, but ruthy seems to be the last choice big now and it seems like a mistake. idk, it's not like charles is a good match up for her but she could definitely go toe to toe with plaisance or gustafson! there's not a very good reason that astou should be getting more minutes than her unless astou is able to come in and exploit a specific matchup (which she sometimes can, just not tonight). and to be honest, z hasn't been great this year. she misses so many layups that we all know ruthy would...not. if she was playing like she did last season before her injury then i would understand it cutting into ruthy's time. but she's been pretty rough!

with the way she played when stef and candace were out, I thought ruthy earned more minutes than she's been getting.

part of the reason the minutes aren't working imo is because unless there's foul trouble he often takes too long to make subs. they started that third quarter TERRIBLY and he still didn't make a sub until like 6 minutes in! and it was allie and then he played her pretty much the entire rest of the game without much of a break. she was excellent today and yet the only reason she made it above 25 minutes (i think she had 28?) was because she played all of ot. and she was gassed at the end because of the way he works those minutes

i know it's not as simple as saying to just sub at the 3 or 4 minute mark, but when you have no flow to start, it's better to start subbing early so starters can get rest when they're not producing anyway, and then you can see if anyone off the bench can get something going. it's not anything crazy, that's just like normal basketball stuff? and it gives you the chance to put your starters back in down the stretch without them being exhausted OR you have the chance to give those productive bench players a couple minutes rest before putting them back in to close out if you want. keeping the starters in so long means that they overcommit and have fewer options later in the game, or everyone is too tired!

it's like sometimes they're only using the bench players as placeholders until the starters can get their breath back, not using them as actual players who bring their own skills and be productive. tonight was one of the first times I actually felt like they played allie appropriately and not as a placeholder for diamond/kah. and they still stopped running plays for her down the stretch.

also only vaguely related, but i thought of it when you said we need more stef-sloot-Q combo minutes. the sloot and stef pick and roll worked SO well tonight and they need to use both that and the stef and allie pick and roll way more. surefire plays to get the offense rolling. especially when stef and allie are both hot at the same time like today

[themadlostgirl]

Not Dead Yet (Part 65)

*ha ha ha...i hate myself...*

Pairing: Reader x Peter Pan

Warnings: language

There were many ways to start a day. Mine started wrapped in the arms of my Peter. I was still kinda miffed about last night but it had dimmed. Peter keeps secrets. Always have. Always will. I need to accept that. Watching him try to make it up to me was nice though. I wouldn’t call Peter Pan a person who looks for cuddles but he wouldn’t let me go that morning. I even pretended that it meant something more than him trying to keep himself in my good graces.

I was able to get him to get up and we walked back to camp. That is where the day went from pleasantly serene to a hot mess in less than five minutes. No one had been keeping an eye on Wendy last night so she attempted an escape via one of the row boats we stole from the pirates. She got caught by said pirates when they noticed her clumsily making her way across the waves and had just sent word they were holding her ransom.

“It is too early for this shit.” I muttered. “I’ll get her.”

I whistled and Candace flew to my shoulder. I didn’t give any of the boys the chance to react before I was marching towards the beach with my club at my side and murder in my eyes. I spotted the Jolly Roger out in the distance and told Candace to take me to it. She grabbed my shoulders in her talons and flew out across the sea. It hurt but it was the quickest way to get across the ocean without having to rely on Peter’s magic.

With my shoulders bleeding and anger set I landed on the pirate ship. Immediately the crew drew their weapons and aimed them at me. I was not having it. They had my Wendy-bird. If they wanted blood there would be blood.

“Watch where you point those.” I strolled pass them unbothered, “Where’s Captain Rum Keg?”

“If it isn’t the she-demon of Neverland.” Hook came up from below the ship, “I believe you’re here for the lass.”

“Yes. Where is she?”

“In my quarters resting.”

“How noble. Is that standard procedure when you find a girl running away from the island?” I snatched the flask of rum off him and took a nip. “Remember what happened last time?”

“Aye. The same mistake was not repeated.”

I tried to move past him towards his quarters but was blocked. “Captain, stand aside before you make my bad mood worse.”

“If you want the lass back then free us of this realm.”

“Or alternately I could bash that scruffy head of yours in and let my phoenix set your ship ablaze and watch as the mermaids devour your charred remains. What’s it gonna be?”

He studied me for a moment and stood aside. “Wise decision.”

“Captain!” one of the crew shouted, “You’re just gonna let her have her way? She’s one person! Without her demon how can she be any threat?”

I stopped and turned back around. Hook looked like he was ready to throw the man overboard himself. “You’re new to this crew, aren’t you?” I dragged my club across the wooden planks as I crossed to him. “The fact that I exist is a threat to you. I will kill every last rum soaked scabby pirate on this ship without any remorse or difficulty. If you did manage to overpower me and kill me then you would incite the ravenous bloodlust of the boy that controls this realm and my brothers that he leads. I would not be so irritated if it wasn’t for the fact that I was having a nice morning up until now.”

With one swift swing of my club the pirate crumpled to the ground, his neck bent at an unnatural angle and blood trickling from his lifeless face. “You took my friend. Threatened her harm. That’s not something I take lightly. Anyone else want to try me or can I collect my bird and be off?”

No one spoke. I huffed pass them and threw open the door to the captain’s quarters. Wendy was sitting on the bed. Her hands and feet bound together with rope. “Hello Darling,” I went over to her and started to saw through the rope, “Are you alright?”

“Y/N, I’m so happy to see you!” she hugged me once I got her free.

“And I’m glad to see you still in one piece.” I hugged her back, “What were you thinking trying to escape like that? You could have been attacked by mermaids or caught up in a storm or starved to death because I doubt you thought to bring rations with you on your escape attempt.”

“I was just thinking of home. Peter wouldn’t let me leave.”

“Come here,” I grabbed her hand and led her back onto the deck, “We need to have a talk.”

I instructed Hook to sail us to shore. Begrudgingly he did as commanded and began the trip back towards the island. Once I was sure that Wendy was alright, save for some bruises and chafe marks from the rope, I relaxed. I sat on the railing of the ship and explained to Wendy something I knew she wasn’t going to like hearing.

“You won’t help me leave?!” she screeched so loudly I nearly fell off the ship.

I shot a dirty look to the pirates to mind their own business before focusing back on Wendy. It took everything in me not to give in. I knew Wendy would want to go home but I couldn’t help her. The last time I tried to help someone leave the island it tore Peter and I apart. She could hate me if she wanted but I wasn’t crossing Peter again. I couldn’t bear it.

“I am truly sorry, Wendy.” I laid a hand on her shoulder, “I know you don’t want to be here but you had your chance to leave before. You got a choice and then you went ahead and came back anyways.”

“I needed to save Baelfire! I wouldn’t have come back if it wasn’t for you people insisting on taking one of my brothers!” she smacked my hand away and crossed to the other side of the ship.

I understood her anger but it still hurt to hear her talking to me like this. “I didn’t know that Peter would take one of your brothers. When I found out it was too late.”

“You could have gotten him sent back though! I know you could have!”

“Wendy, there is a lot you don’t know about what happened while you were gone. There is a lot of history between Peter and Baelfire and it made things complicated. If it was one of your actual brothers it may have been different but with Baelfire…”

“History? How did Peter know Bae?”

“It’s not my place to say.” Especially when about a dozen pirates were eavesdropping, “But you should know I did try to help him leave. I told him how to get off the island. He almost made it but someone overheard me helping him and ratted us out to Peter. Things went downhill after that.”

“And...you left…” she calmed down slightly. She almost seemed guilty.

“Yeah…”

“What happened here? Why did you leave? I tried to weasel it out of Peter but he wouldn’t say anything.”

I motioned for her to come closer. I turned her around and started to braid her hair back from her face as I explained. “We fought, stopped talking to each other, I couldn’t take it anymore so I left. That’s all there is to say.”

She was quiet for a moment before she spoke again, barely above a whisper, “Did he...has he said anything to you? Anything new?”

“No. Why? Do you know something?” My heart picked up for some reason.

“Not a thing.” she sighed.

“You’re a terrible liar, Darling.”

“Not all of us have as much practice as you.”

“But I’ve never lied to you.” I whispered in her ear as I tied off the braid. “I need you to know that I am sorry about all of this. About you being stuck here and about Bae. I am sorry for everything but there’s nothing I can do about it now.”

She turned towards me with her head hung low. I tilted her head back up. I needed her to know I was being sincere. “Neverland can be a great home if you let it. The boys and I. There’s Tigerlily and a new ex-fairy named Tinkerbell who seems nice so we aren’t the only girls on the island. It can be fun here. You can have a family here...if you want.”

“I--I--” she had gone pure red.

“Sorry.” I retreated up into the rigging, “You’ve been through a lot. Take your time and sort through all this at your own pace.”

We got to the beach and Peter was waiting with a group of boys. They didn’t look to happy. Wendy reached for my hand squeezing it tight. “Don’t worry about them. I won’t let them lock you up again.” I tugged her along behind me.

“That was reckless, pet.” Peter chastised.

“I had it under control.” I assured him, “Did you doubt me?”

“Never.” he kissed my cheek, “I adore it when you get that murderous gleam in your eye.”

“I know you do.” I smirked back at him. “Disappointed you didn’t get to witness the result of my anger?”

“Kill someone, did we?”

“One blow to the head.” I tossed him my bloodied club.

“Gods I’ve missed you,” he kissed me again. A laugh bubbled up in my throat as he did.

“Ahem,” Wendy cleared her throat.

“Sorry Darling,” I broke the kiss with an embarrassed smile, “He’s insatiable.”

“Right,” Peter peered behind me narrowing his eyes at Wendy, “What are we going to do with you?”

“Don’t,” I pushed him away from her, “We talked. She’s okay.”

“Are you sure about that? She’s already proven to be an issue. Her promises don’t mean anything.”

“You have my word, she isn’t going to cause any more problems. If she does then you can lock her up.”

“Y/N!” Wendy whined.

“Don’t look at me like that, you’re the one that tried to leave after promising not to cause more trouble.” I rolled my eyes and glanced down at her bare feet. “Let’s go get you some shoes.”

We went back to camp and I tossed her some shoes and change of clothes. I even gave her my tent to stay in for the foreseeable future. Outside of the time Peter and I weren’t talking to each other I usually stayed in his tent at night. Mine was just collecting dust.

She was quiet and when I tried to talk her into going to training she ignored me and stayed in the tent. This is not going to be as easy as the first time around. “Keep near her,” I told Candace as I set off for training with the rest of the boys.

I paired off with Peter during training. We had an agreement that he wouldn’t use magic while we fought. It evened the battlefield and kept his skills sharp in case he ever didn’t have magic to help him in fights. Even with magic though I would have been able to beat him. Wendy probably would have been able to pin him today!

“Come now, chief,” I pinned him again, “Don’t tell me you’re going easy on me.”

“I’d never insult you so, pet,” he sighed. “I guess I don’t have the energy today.”

“Maybe if you didn’t stay up all night you wouldn’t be so tired.”

“Maybe if you weren’t giving me a reason to stay up all night I would actually get some sleep.”

“That can be arranged.”

“No.” he grabbed me and rolled on top of me, “Sleep is for the weak anyway.” He traced the lines of my face. That same soft look in his eyes from yesterday that I couldn’t quite place.

“Do you want us to leave?” Nick said drawing our attention back to the training ground where all the Lost Boys were watching us with differing levels of discomfort.

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Peter!”

“What?”

“I swear…” I broke out of his hold and recollected my club from the ground. “If you’re so tired go take a nap. I’m gonna keep training.”

“I’m not tired.”

“Tell that to the five times I beat you to the ground in the past half hour.” I grabbed Nick and dragged his smirking ass towards the archery targets. “Nick, if you don’t stop with that smug look you are going to be what I’m shooting at.”

~~~

This is unfair. He’s already dying. Why does he have to throw up blood too?

Peter spit out the taste of blood and bile still souring his tongue.

“I didn’t even do anything this time. Can I no longer flirt with my Lost Girl now?” Another wave of nausea washed over him and he steadied himself against a tree as he heaved. “Dammit.”

“Peter?”

Fuck.

He turned around and saw Wendy watching him her face etched with concern.

“Afternoon,” he waved his hand and the bloody vomit disappeared down into the earth. “Heading to training?”

“No. I was going to go visit Tigerlily and the new fairy. Are you alright?”

“Fine. Go on with your visit.” he tried to walk away before the pain in his abdomen made him double over again. He pressed a hand to his stomach to quell the damage that was being done to his insides.

“You are not fine,” Wendy knelt next to him. She pressed a hand to his forehead. “You’re burning up.”

“Shove off,” he swatted her hand away. “I can handle this.”

“Are you sure about that? You’re as white as a sheet.” she handed him a canteen of water, “Drink.”

“I told you--” he felt a small rush of puke rise in his throat. He swallowed it back.

“I’m getting Y/N.”

“No!” he grabbed her wrist, “You can’t tell Y/N.”

“Why not?”

Peter stayed silent.

Wendy pushed the canteen into his hands once again. He took a sip knowing it wouldn’t help but it would be nice to get this terrible taste out of his mouth.

“How long has this been going on?”

“Since yesterday.”

“When Y/N returned?”

He got quiet again.

“How does her returning tie into you being sick?”

“Reasons you cannot begin to understand.”

“Magic reasons.”

“Yes.”

“Why aren’t you telling Y/N? If it has to do with her then I think she ought to know. She’ll find out eventually no matter what. Why keep her in the dark like this?”

Peter debated how much he should confide in the girl that tried to escape and knew more about his feelings for Y/N than even he did. He didn’t have much to lose either way.

“I just got her back.” he murmured, “I’m not going to worry her over something as trivial as an upset stomach.”

“You’d rather keep secrets about something that is physically hurting you and risk Y/N getting upset and maybe even angry about it? For someone who is doing this because you just got her back this seems a great way to drive her away again. Don’t you think?”

“I hate you,”

“Maybe.” she nodded unbothered, “But I know that you’re sick. You can’t get rid of me because Y/N won’t allow it. There is nothing stopping me from going and telling her all of this.”

“What do you want?”

“That you tell her the truth.”

“I’m not telling her about some magically induced curse vomit.”

“That’s not what I was referring to.” She stood to her feet. “You don’t want her to leave again? You want to give her a reason to forgive you when she finds out you’re keeping this from her? Then tell her the truth. This isn’t an ultimatum, Pan. It’s advice. I suggest you take it.”

Peter watched her walk away. The truth...how can he tell her the truth when it’ll literally kill him to do so?

(First) (Previous) (Next)

[tanyaodebra]

You 2.6: “Farewell, My Bunny” – Who’s Zoomin’ Who?

Sorry, it’s been a minute. Life. Let’s dive right back in. Well, folks, Henderson is still dead. Apparently any rando can show up at his funeral, but also Kathy Griffin is delivering the eulogy. They really should have upped that background budget so we could feel the fantasy. Or they could have dressed some of those extras as security. Help us out here. Inexplicably, the whole gang is in attendance – well, it’s inexplicable until they explain theme of this episode: the seven totems to true Angeleno status. Once a person sees these seven things that are supposedly unique to Los Angeles, they can never leave. One by one, Joe sees them all. This does not bode well for Lonely Boy; I’m starting to wonder if he’ll make it out of this season alive. Joe and Love continue to wolf the shit out of each other, so we’ll eventually see who the top dog really is.

Looks like Joe’s not the only one hiding a secret stash. Love opens a locker at Anavrin to reveal her collection of mementos from her deceased husband – or are they trophies? A series of flashbacks clues the audience in on Love’s married life. Her husband, James (Daniel Durrant), wants her to take his last name (Kennedy), but does not seem interested in having kids as per her wishes. Side note: James is deaf and there’s no plot reason to have a deaf character – he just happens to be deaf. Kudos to the writers for making this choice. Two sets of flashbacks about James are triggered by her situation with Joe – the first one deals with their distaste for her money, the second ties together the ways they both hid important information from her. It turns out that James’s reluctance to procreate is due to his terminal illness – a reality he’d been hiding for eight weeks. In classic Love fashion, she’s able to turn the lie into the important part of the conversation. She’s been wronged, and that trumps his imminent death. He must console her instead of what should be happening, which is that she should be consoling him. Love finds a way to center her own pain in every situation. If Love is responsible for James’s death, as I believe she is, the fact that she binds James and Joe together puts Joe in a very precarious spot.

Joe is none the wiser, though. He’s too busy tracking Candace’s scent trail. He brings up Raymond Chandler AGAIN – they’re really hammering this LA detective story. But the tables are turned when Joe realizes he’s not actually the detective, because there’s an undercover cop seemingly everywhere he goes. Doesn’t feel great, does it, Joey? The Chandler motif continues when Ellie points out the book Joe’s reading – Farewell, My Lovely. I’d love to make some connections here, but the plot summary on Wikipedia is too complicated. There is a woman who’s lying about her identity, though. Joe tricks Forty into handing over enough info to track down Candace’s address. When Joe turns up at her place, the undercover cop is there. Joe bolts, but is somehow still hours late to a doughnut date with Love – this is the second time they’ve tanked their plans to leave town. The undercover cop is now at Anavrin, but according to Love, she hired him to follow “Amy.” Time will tell if she’s telling the whole truth. Love’s mask slips a bit when she defends her decision to use her vast resources to protect her family. Talking about her wealth is definitely a flex, but she walks it back and promises she’ll can the PI. But when the detective has news about “Amy’s” connection to “Will,” Love’s two-faced nature surfaces as she smiles at Joe during her deceitful phone call. Love’s mask slips again near the end of the episode. She claimed in an earlier episode that baking is her love language, but apparently it’s also her revenge language. She feeds Joe a sabotaged sticky bun after the truth about him has been uncovered. I have a feeling baking will play a role in whatever she ultimately does to Joe.

So many detectives! Let’s not lose sight of Candace, who came here on a mission. Taking a page from Joe’s playbook, Candace obtains Joe’s address from Forty’s production paperwork. Girlfriend is skilled, because she convinces Delilah to rummage through Joe’s apartment solely by her superior room-reading skills – she trashes Hendy after Delilah brings up his funeral. As Delilah hunts for a fictional pair of earrings, Candace unlocks a window for later. Joke’s on Candace, though. Joe’s not home later. Love’s sitting at the kitchen table when Candace breaks in, and she knows it’s Candace, not Amy. Candace loses the ruse and tells all about Joe’s true identity, as well as his penchant for murdering his girlfriends. The audience knows she’s telling the truth when she says she’s trying to protect Love, but does Love believe her?

No detective story is complete without a red herring, which is what Joe’s break-in at Candace’s Airbnb turns out to be. Just when it looks like Joe is going to do exactly what we expect him to do and murder Candace, he gets whacked upside the head and knocked out cold. Getting clunked on the head is classic detective story fare, btw. The viewer assumes it will be Candace finally and rightfully extinguishing her burning bed, but alas it’s the Airbnb host (Madeline Zima). Did you stare at this actress forever, unable to place her but weirdly able to conjure up what she looked like as a small child? Me too! She’s the kid from The Hand That Rocks the Cradle! Well, she’s all grown up now and she trusts no bitch, which is evident from her stack of books about martial arts and rope bondage. You go, girl! Anyway, it all adds up to a big fat zero, since Rachel sets him free.

The penultimate scene is a reckoning between Joe and Love. She knows everything, but Joe convinces her that some of Candace’s story is true, but not the murders. Of course, not the murders. But where is Candace? Candace could have been waiting for Joe alongside Love in a show of solidarity, but she’s notably absent. Love says she paid Candace to stay away. I say Love killed her. It’s weird that Love would bribe her instead of going to the authorities. I guess Love is blind after all, because by getting rid of Candace she’s implicitly buying Joe’s side of the story before she even hears it. If Love is obsessed with Joe, Candace is a very inconvenient element and killing her is the only way to ensure that she stays gone. Love is playing a very advanced game here, so she uses the time-tested tactic of breaking up in order to exert control. Gosh, it just tramples her heart to have to do this, but she absolutely must end things with Joe. In the end, it’s Forty who patches things up on Joe’s behalf. Certainly, Joe will feel that he must earn his second chance. The leash is bound to be very short now. But lest we forget, Joe is a narcissist. Joe does what feels good in the moment, regardless of how his choices may affect others, so he literally thanks Forty for getting him a second chance with Love one minute, then fucks Delilah the next. He’s like a toddler with no object permanence – if the object of his affection is not in front of his eyes that very moment, it does not exist. And, of course, this creep shoots his shot by consoling Delilah about her rape! Ugh, I will really enjoy his murder if/when it happens. Delilah is in definite danger now, though. When Love gets wind of this, and she will, Delilah is toast. Get ready for the “we were on a break” defense from Joe. You hate to see it. Until next time!

[themadlostgirl]

Not Dead Yet (Part 64)

*Meant to have this out for Halloween*

Pairing: Reader x Peter Pan

Warnings: language

“Y/N,” Devin beckoned me over. He had my bag and Candace on his shoulder. Upon seeing me my phoenix flew to me and nuzzled my cheek with her beak.

“Hey girl, sorry about leaving you back in the forest.” I scratched the top of her head. Devin handed me my bag. All the clothes I had bought were still in it along with all my money. What I was truly glad to see though was my club. It felt good to have my primary weapon back in my grasp.

“About time you got back.” I told Devin, “I didn’t think it would take you so long to find Candace and my club.”

“Oh no, I found them rather quickly. I also met someone, a friend of yours named Phillip.”

“Ah,” I nodded, “Nice kid. He help you at all?”

“Yes he did. He had collected your things from your room after you were taken.” Devin was practically burning with rage, “He said that you had been taken prisoner by the Dark One.”

My blood froze solid in my veins. “Devin--”

“The Dark One!” he spat under his breath, “That is who had you! You know you’re lucky to be alive.”

“Shut it!” I clamped my hands over his mouth. I peered around to make sure no one had heard before pulling him away from the camp. Once we were far enough away I let go. “Have you told anyone?”

“No.” Devin started pacing. “If it was any other enemy I would have gone straight to Pan. But the Dark One is not another mere enemy. That is the only reason I haven’t said anything.”

“And I am begging you not to. Please, Devin, please do not tell Peter or anyone else that you know who took me.”

“Why not? Pan can take him. I know he isn’t as powerful off the island but I know he has power to rival that of anyone.”

“No he doesn’t. Not anymore at least. There’s a lot of factors at play that you don’t know about.”

“You mean like that curse the Black fairy mentioned when she possessed your body? The one Pan is apparently under.”

“Shut it!” I snapped. “Yes, the curse is a part of it.”

“What is this curse? What’s wrong with him? Why is it only you knew about it?”

“I can’t tell you. You know I can’t.”

“Of course you can’t. If it has to do with Pan then you can’t say anything. He’s our leader. Don’t we deserve to know what is happening?”

“That’s something to ask him, not me. I just made up with him and I am not going to put that in jeopardy because you want answers I am not free to give.”

“If it wasn’t for the fact I know how you two are I might be jealous of how much you trust one another. As it stands though, I am nothing but another Lost Boy as far as Pan is concerned. I am no Felix and I am certainly no Y/N so I am entitled to nothing.”

“Devin--”

“I won’t say anything because I have faith that you will keep the cocky bastard safe. There’s reasons and history behind why you aren’t telling him and letting us get revenge. As long as you promise you are going to tell the others one day, I’ll let it go.”

“Thank you,” I hugged him, “In time we will get our revenge but there is too much going on right now.”

“I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“Me too.”

We started to walk back to camp in uncomfortable silence. As the lights of the bonfire were visible Devin whispered. “Why did he take you in the first place? What happened to you?”

I took a deep breath as I found the courage to think back on my days of torture. “He found out I was from Neverland. He kept me tethered in his dungeon and tortured me so I would give him information about Peter. I didn't say anything. I refused. I didn't know what he would do with the information but I knew it was nothing good. I had to protect Neverland...protect Peter…protect everyone.”

“You could have died.”

“Better one lost life than the annihilation of an entire realm.” I tried to sound sure but my voice wavered.

Devin stopped, gathering me in his arms. My body trembled as I fought back the urge to break down into tears. “You can cry,” he whispered, “it’s okay. You’ve been strong long enough.”

I was ready and willing to die for Peter and my brothers but when I was looking death in the face I flinched. For as ready as I thought I was, and as sure in my decision as I was rooted, a voice cried out to me to stay alive. Do anything to stay alive. I have looked death in the face so many times but approaching it slowly, knowing it was definitely the end… “I was scared. I was so fucking scared.”

“It’s okay. It’ll be okay.” he whispered soothingly. “Pan’s coming. If you wanna avoid questions you better dry those tears.”

I wiped at my eyes. “What tears?”

“Strong and stoic once again.” Devin gave me a sympathetic smile before walking off.

“Finally,” Peter wrapped his arms around my middle and pulled me back to his chest, “I can have you all to myself once more.”

I rolled my eyes but said nothing else. The attention was too good to spoil. “Does that mean you’re finally going to tell me what it is you mentioned this morning?”

He got quiet again. “Yes. But first, it has been months since we’ve been together properly. I’ll be sure to tell you after.”

“Promises promises,”

“And I always keep them.”

He took my hand and tugged me along through the camp.

“Is there a reason why you’re not just poofing us to privacy?” I asked. If he was really so impatient to get me in bed then we would not be taking a leisurely stroll.

“Yes.” he flashed me that devious smirk of his as we passed the boys gathered around the bonfire. He spun me around in a dance. My feet were clumsy from not dancing in so long and it took a minute for me to get back into the swing of it.

Faster and faster we twirled around the fire. The flames seemed to reach towards us, spinning around and growing hotter the more we danced. The memory of what happened to me in the Enchanted Forest became more distant as I lost myself in the dance.

Sparks flew out of the fire and surrounded us like fireflies. It wasn’t scary though. Not for one moment was I worried that I would get burned. I was with Peter and the floating sparks made his deep green eyes glitter. I’m home. I’m safe.

I pulled him closer and kissed him. Stupid complicated feelings bubbling under my skin. “Peter…”

“I know.” he kissed me again and the lights flickered out around us. There was an assortment of whistles and groans from the boys. “Cavern?”

“Cavern.” I agreed.

He teleported us down to the cavern under his Thinking Tree. It went by rather quickly. After months of not even touching a lot had built up. Peter tried to play it off like a compliment. I was just that arousing. No amount of compliments was going to stop me from heckling him about tapping out at three pumps. Not that the night ended there of course. Fifteen minutes later and we were back to business and Peter made up over and over for the rough start.

After who knows how long we laid back fully sated on the furs. Peter curled behind me, his hands stretched out to mine and playing mindlessly with my fingers. It was a nice quiet moment that I didn’t want to spoil but my curiosity had reached its peak.

“Peter?”

“Y/N?”

“What was it you wanted to tell me this morning?”

“Oh right…” he nestled his chin in the crook between my neck and shoulder, “It’s complicated. I’m not sure how to start.”

“Take it one word at a time.”

“Okay,” he rolled me over so I was looking him in the face. He studied me for a moment, the smallest of smiles lighting his features as he stroked my cheek. “Y/N. Pet. My Lost Girl.”

“Peter. Chief. My leader.”

“Stop.” he bumped his nose against mine, “Do you think mocking me is cute?”

“Yes.” I smirked.

He rolled his eyes and continued on. “Y/N, I…”

He stopped again. He tensed in my arms and the color drained from his face. “Peter? Are you alright?”

“Y-yeah.” he pulled back from me, “You know what, it’s not important. Forget I said anything.”

“What? You certainly made it sound important.”

“I make a lot of things sound important.” he planted a kiss on my cheek. “Doesn’t necessarily mean that it is.”

My heart dropped into my stomach. “Are you really going to keep me in the dark again? I thought you trusted me.”

“I do. But now isn’t the time for it.”

“What are you talking about? What is wrong now?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” He didn’t sound sure but was still trying to get me back in his arms. “I’m just glad to have you home.”

There was something he wasn’t telling me. There’s always something he’s hiding from me. I would have hoped we were past that.

“I’m glad to be home.” I kissed him before rolling out of his arms and collecting my clothes from the ground.

“Pet,” he sat up, “Come back to bed.”

“I will. But I’m really thirsty. I’ll be back in minute.” I pulled the ladder down and climbed out. I hated leaving him alone down there but I needed a minute to myself to cool down. I got some ridiculous notion in my head that maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t the only one of us struggling with complicated and powerful feelings. A part of me wanted to believe that he felt something for me. Something that I know I feel for him. That’s asking too much of the codfish though. We were friends and lovers and that’s all it was ever going to be. To ask anything more was a fantasy not even Neverland could make real.

~~~

Peter watched as Y/N huffed her way up the ladder and out of the cavern. Once she was gone he leaned off the bed and puked up everything but his memories. The nausea passed and he cleared the bloody vomit with a quick wave of his hand. He didn’t know how he had been able to hold out for as long as he did.

He started feeling sick this morning and it slowly got worse as the day wore on. It wasn’t until he was looking Y/N in the face that it hit him like a tsunami. The curse was worsening or at least it was trying to. He’d have to check on the hourglass later.

The last time the curse worsened Tigerlily told him that it was because he was too happy. Peter was already narrowly dodging his death with the help from the broken bit of wand. He couldn’t risk aggravating it. He needed to stay alive. The entire island and everyone on it depended on him staying alive and getting the heart of the Truest Believer. He couldn’t let that happen. He had to keep Neverland intact and more importantly, she needed to be safe.

It pained him. Having to lie to his Lost Girl. Having to let her march off in anger because he was keeping secrets from her. He couldn’t gamble on something that could make his condition worse. He could deal with her anger and the sickness just fine. He couldn’t risk endangering Y/N though.

She did return eventually and crawled back into the bed. He could tell she was still upset at him but at least she was here. She was home and she was safe. “I’ll fix this, pet. I’ll fix this for the both of us.” he whispered to her sleeping face, “My word is my bond.”

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[themadlostgirl]

Not Dead Yet (Part 58)

*These two need to get their sh*t together*

Pairing: Reader x Peter Pan

Warnings: language

“Oh fuck me,” I muttered under my breath. “This is bad. This is so bad.”

“Y/N?”

“Stay the hell away from me!” I snapped at Baelfire. “This is all your fault!”

“My fault? You’re the one that told Pan I was trying to escape.”

“No I didn’t. One of the others heard us back at camp and told him. You’re the idiot that tried escaping in broad daylight! You do this kind of stuff under the cover of darkness!” I wanted to grab him and throw him into the walls of dreamshade but stopped myself. I am on shaky ground with Peter now and throwing Baelfire to his death would not be a wise way to get back into his good graces.

I pulled out my dagger and started cutting my way through the dreamshade. I doubt Peter would come back for us right away and I was not staying here all night. Slowly but surely I was able to clear a path through big enough that there was little to no harm of cutting myself. Baelfire followed me out. Once we were free I kept my poison soaked dagger poised at his back. “Move, try to escape and I will make sure you will never leave this island.”

“Against me now? Upset your boyfriend so now your morals are gone?”

“Boyfriend?”

“Yes, isn’t that what he is?”

“He is a boy, loosely speaking, and was my friend until this little incident.”

“No, it means paramour.”

“Why not just say paramour?”

“Why are you arguing this of all things?”

“Because I’m pissed and if I’m being honest...worried.”

“Why?”

“You didn’t see him. I’ve ticked him off, pushed him way past his limits, tried to kill him, but this,” I swallowed the lump in my throat, “He’s lost trust in me and now I’m scared I won’t be able to win it back. The first thing I can do to correct this latest blunder is by bringing you back to camp. Now move.”

We eventually made it back to a part of the island that wasn’t dead and I tore a vine from one of the trees and bound Baelfire. I was worried that Peter may have moved camp to vex me further but mercifully it was still in place. I shoved Baelfire back into one of the cages and made sure my dagger was still in its sheath before walking back into the middle of the camp.

No one was treating me any differently so that was a good sign. Peter hadn’t announced to the camp what I had done yet. Speaking of, I could see him chatting idly with Felix and some of the other boys. I need to face him sometime. It’s been a couple hours so hopefully he’s cooled down. Perhaps my mind had been making a bigger deal out of this. I have done far worse things and received almost no punishment.

I took a deep breath and approached him. “Hello,” I joined the group, “What are we talking about?”

“Things,” Felix shrugged, “Where have you been?”

“Out,” I mimicked his shrug.

Peter wasn’t saying anything.

“Can I take a minute alone with the chief here?” I asked the boys. They nodded and walked off.

Now alone with him I felt the same ball of anxiety crawling up my throat. “Peter?”

“Hm?” he kept staring straight ahead.

“I don’t suppose apologizing would make this all go away?”

“And you would be right.”

“But maybe there is something else I could do to make it up to you?” I looped an arm around him.

“Don’t betray me again and do as you’re told. There’s a start,” he shoved me away and stalked off.

A couple days passed and Peter would barely talk to me. He refused to even look at me. It didn’t go unnoticed by the camp either. Little things that used to be commonplace no longer happened. No dancing around the fire, no leaning against one another while we sat or small pecks throughout the day. Certainly no sex. No falling asleep next to him, the sound of his breathing and heartbeat lulling me to sleep. I haven’t had a proper rest since he cut me out of his life.

I tried all I could think of to make things better. I was the perfect Lost Girl and if I felt like I was pushing things with him in my efforts I backed off. No matter what I did though, no matter how hard I tried, I was still merely Y/N to him. Not pet or his Lost Girl. Just Y/N. I can’t believe I actually missed that condescending nickname. His precious pet.

After a week of the barest scrap of attention from him I was starting to lose hope. He can’t stay mad at me forever...right?

Was this revenge for the month long silent treatment? Was he going to make me squirm just as long as I made him? I tried to apologize for it. Did he want me to beg? I am willing to do a lot of things but going to that imp on my knees and pleading for forgiveness is not one of them. I had to retain some pride.

I stopped trying to get his attention and ignored him too after the first month of nothing. I can play this dumb game of his too. I played with Devin, Nick and Ben most days, spent a lot of time chatting with Tigerlily too. They didn’t think much of Peter and I’s fight thinking that it would resolve itself in due time but after a month of Peter not so much as glancing in my general direction they became...concerned. I told them to stop fretting over something so stupid. This was just another one of our fights. It may just take longer to forgive and forget.

During the first month Baelfire was acting more like a Lost Boy. He still got taken to training and beaten the hell out of him but he was getting tougher. Holding out longer. Learning how to fight back properly. He was still being kept in the cages at night for the time being. He wasn’t broken yet and we weren’t letting him out of his own accord until he was.

Any twinge of guilt I may have had for him was gone. Wendy’s brother or not his idiocy is what caused this rift between Peter and I. I wouldn’t let the others kill him but I was done playing the knight.

After the second month I had grown used to the distance. I still missed our time together back before but it was background noise now. Tried seeing things from his point of view. I know that i screwed up by giving Baelfire a tip to escape but I didn’t think Peter would react so harshly. I guess I did purposely betray him. We usually killed boys for that. Being ignored wasn’t too bad in comparison.

The third month I started to worry. Three months. Ninety so days of Peter not saying a single word to me that wasn’t absolutely necessary. Ninety days since the last time he kissed me. It wasn’t even the thought that he may never speak to me again that made me uneasy. It was the fear that I would wake up one morning and know he had spent the night off the island. Spent it with someone else. Ninety days all the complicated feelings from before taunted me in my sleep. Three short months, ninety something days, I finally allowed myself enough pity for one good cry.

It didn’t help.

Four months passed and Baelfire had escaped the camp. The entire camp went on a man hunt for him. Peter had found him instantly but let him be. It was a new game. There was no more bean grove for him to run to. So started the timer on how long it would take him to make it off the island, if he even could. I ran into him on odd days. Never said a word. Just gave him a passing scowl and moved on. I was done being mad at him. I was done feeling sorry for myself.

Five months. I started referring to Peter as Pan again. He gave no reaction to this. I don’t care anymore.

One hundred and sixty three days since the incident with Baelfire and Peter cut me from his life I had had enough. I wasn��t having fun anymore. It was the same thing day in and day out. Without Peter there making me laugh and playing our games it was just so boring on Neverland. I spent a long time going back and forth with myself before deciding to leave.

I grabbed my emergency magic bean I had hidden in a tree and packed up some provisions as well as some gold and silver pieces. Growing up had to be better than this motony.

I didn’t tell anyone. They would have talked me out of it. They couldn’t understand. This was my home and they were my family but it held no joy anymore. One last time I had gone to the underground cavern underneath Peter’s Thinking Tree and found a blank piece of parchment. I doubted that he would care but I penned a letter to Peter letting him know that I was leaving and that I was sorry for betraying his trust. I had tried apologizing. I did what he wanted and he still let this continue on after so long. I didn’t know what else I could do to make this better. I dropped it in his tent later that night.

Grabbing Candace, my bean, my bag of essentials and my weapons I went to the beach for one last look at the ocean. My stomach clenched at the thought of never seeing this realm again but I had decided. I had no more purpose here.

I took a deep breath and tossed the bean to the ground.

~~~

If Peter could have counted on any of his recruits not to betray him he would have thought it’d be Y/N. He knew she had a history of letting boys that wanted to leave the island actually leave despite his rule that no one go without his permission. But she also knew the history behind his feud with the Dark One. To go ahead and mock him like she did was infuriating.

The first month he had ignored her as best he could. He was pissed. She knew he was and it wasn’t going to be swept away by her silver tongue or offers of apology sex. A taste of her own medicine from when she gave him the silent treatment.

Peter wanted her to come to him and admit that she was wrong. He wanted to see her swallow her damn pride and plead for forgiveness. She was the one to blame this time so he was not going to be the one to make the first move. If she wanted things to be better between them then she needed to make the effort. He didn’t care how long it took.

Months passed of them saying barely anything to each other. It was a hard act to keep up for so long. To not reach out and touch her like he wanted to. Making sure her attention was elsewhere when he watched her from across the camp. He kept staring at her lips wanting to sprint across the camp and claim them again. To take her away and strip away those bothersome clothes of hers and show her there were no hard feelings.

All of what they had could be theirs again if she just came up to him and said she was wrong for betraying him again. Stubborn as she was she had to have a breaking point. His had been one month. Hers apparently took much longer to reach.

At some point she started calling him Pan instead of Peter. It was the only time he truly worried that she didn’t care about reclaiming what they had. She couldn’t have moved on so quickly...could she?

He decided that if it got to be a year and she was still keeping her distance from him then he would end this feud between them. The thought of having to go back to her after she was the one that disobeyed him wasn’t appealing. Never getting to fall asleep with his Lost Girl in his arms was worse.

Almost six months into their waiting game one of the boys made a pass at Y/N. She broke his arm. Peter made a mental not to make sure an army of fire ants invaded his tent when he fell asleep.

The night was in full swing with all the boys jumping around the bonfire and dancing like wild monkeys. Peter’s eyes scanned the camp for Y/N but didn’t spot her. She was probably off with Tigerlily again. She had come to spend a lot of time with the former fairy during their separation.

He was thinking of heading to his Thinking Tree when he felt a soul leave the island. That was impossible though. He had killed off the magic bean grove and the remaining beans were on his person at all times so not even the greatest pickpocket could reach.

Baelfire. The little shit had finally found some way off the island.

No...Baelfire was still on the island. He could sense his presence not too far from camp. Then who had left? He was used to the feeling of the mermaids coming and going from the realm. This was different. It was a presence he knew.

Something wasn’t right.

Peter tried to shrug it off but it wouldn’t leave him be. He turned in early in hopes of clearing his head. He flopped down on his cot and heard a crunch. Confused he sat up again and noticed the piece of parchment he had flattened with his butt. What was this about?

~~~

When the portal closed I was no longer on Neverland but standing ankle deep in freezing snow. Why did it have to be winter in the other realm when I decided to leave? Just my luck I suppose. I stuck Candace in my coat to shield her from the snow. She let out a little chirp and started to warm. I was worried she was combusting again before I realized she was using her fiery phoenix ability to keep me warm.

“Thanks girl,” I nuzzled her closer. I drew my scarf up around my nose and mouth so my lungs wouldn’t be as affected by the cold. Gonna need to get used to dealing with my breathing problems in the cold again if I’m not living in an eternal summer anymore.

I trudged closer to the nearby town and stepped into the inn shivering. I must have been quite the sight with my club over my shoulder and phoenix tucked inside my coat. The innkeeper gave me a weary look but gave me a room anyways when I flashed my heavy coin purse. “Make sure your pet doesn’t tear up the room.”

“No worries,” I assured him and walked up the steps.

I let Candace out and watched her make her home in the fireplace setting it ablaze and sitting comfortably in the flames. “You are a strange little bird, you know that? Any other secret talents you wanna tell me about?”

She cocked her head to the side as if she was giving it a thought. I shrugged off my coat and sat down on the bed to tug off my boots and wet socks. My toes were like ice after being out in the cold for so long.

I slipped under the blankets of the warm bed and closed my eyes. A lot had happened tonight but I was too tired to care. Right now all I wanted was some rest.

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