#can people please stop using the word “psychopath” when they just wanna describe an evil character.

[pinkpixelpolygon]

screaming at the void why did this happen again

[just-another-hhazbin]

Alright it is time to risk getting myself cancelled. Today we’re going to be talking about aspd, aka anti-social personality disorder.  I’m making this post because I haven’t seen one that discusses everything I wanna talk about so here we are.

What is anti-social personality disorder?  In the barest essentials, it is an emotional disorder where it is very difficult to empathize with other people and understand their emotions, have high levels of apathy, etc. Sometimes it also correlates with very low impulse control.

In other words, it’s what some of y’all like to call sociopathy and psychopathy.

Let’s get one thing clear first - sociopathy and psychopathy are not actual pscyhology-approved words. ASPD is. However, the media and culture (or at least American culture, which is what I have first-hand experience with) has villianized and exaggerated it into this common trend where every criminal or horror figure HAS to be a sociopath or psychopath. 

Yeah, as one does with mental illnesses. Thanks, Hollywood + Government.

So right off the bat - please I beg of you to stop using psychopath and sociopath to describe someone “crazy” or “evil.” Stop that. (I’m not saying never ever use the word. Some characters are gonna say slurs cause they be like that. But you, personally, should know better. And also stop putting it in your story summaries and character descriptions, goddamn.) 

You are perpetuating a false narrative. It is estimated that 1 in 100 people in America have ASPD. Someone you know probably has it, even if they haven’t been officially diagnosed or even know they have it. If they do know, they’re probably really damn sick of hearing that comparison. 

ASPD is also not an aesthetic, and you know exactly who you are. If you want the edgy serial killer aesthetic I am certainly not going to judge you, but for the love of everything leave aspd out of it.

Someone with ASPD is not emotionless.  That’s another false narrative we can chuck out the window. It is true that they might be quicker to temper or seem somewhat cold or analytical, but those are hardly traits limited to those with ASPD. Some people do have higher levels of apathy and/or narcissis than others, but none of us are robots so cut that generalizing shit out.

As with most things, ASPD is a spectrum with different levels of effect and functionality. Someone who is more affected by ASPD but has been to therapy may have a higher functionality than someone with a milder situation. 

Personal experiences shape individuals, shocking, I know.

Also, just because someone has ASPD does not mean that they cannot form relationships or friendships. It may be difficult to understand empathy but sympathy can often be managed, and it is possible to feel affection and friendship in some form for even the most severe cases. 

It also doesn’t mean that they can or will ever develop empathy. We are viewing the same world but with different lenses, and that is okay. 

We might not see friendships or relationships the same but that doesn’t mean we can’t form attachments or feel a sort of acknowledged possessiveness that is the equivalent for some of us.

That there is a lack of empathy doesn’t make someone a bad person. It is still possible for someone without empathy to look at a bad thing and know it exists and not do it because they have A) their own moral code that may not make sense to the normative lense or B) they have self-preservation and/or a basic understanding of social norms and fucking decency.

“But I know someone who did [x bad thing] and THEY were diagnosed with sociopathy/psychopathy!”

First off, I’d like to see who made that diagnossis, since again, those aren’t considered valid terminology by the majority of the modern psychology world. Secondly, I bet I can fiind at least a hundred to a thousand to a million people who did [x bad thing] and don’t have aspd. Correlation does not equal causation, people.

You don’t have to understand something to still choose to do it. We might not understand why someone would be affected by x action, but we can choose what impact we make. There is no little sociopath/psychopath demon running around in our head laughing maniacally and pressing “evil” buttons. (This is a thing that therapy can help with though, especially for some people. For others it’s more a matter of socialization and exposure and it’s a learning process for everyone, aspd or not.)

I would also like to take a moment here to say that if someone tries to excuse their abusive behavior with “I have aspd/[x mental illness here]” it is just that - an excuse. If they are in a situation where they really cannot control themselves, then it is time to go to therapy or call counseling services and in any case you yourself are in no way indebted to helping them or staying in a dangerous relationship.

Anyway, disclaimer over, moving on.

A lot of this has been discussed around, so here’s onto something I’ve been seeing a lot of recently, especially in fandom and certain LGBTQ+ spaces, and am getting really sick of.

ASEXUALITY, AROMANTICISM, AND ASPD DO NOT HAVE TO BE LINKED

The ace =/= aro argument has already been said a thousand times, but I’ll say it again. Both asexuality and aromanticism are spectrums and they do not go hand in hand. People who want sex might not want love and people who want love might not want sex and, once again, that is OKAY. 

Now, onto the aspd factor - lately I’ve been seeing a lot of people saying “oh, such and such character is ace/aro/acearo, they MUST have aspd [or other terms]” or “such and such is a psychopath/sociopath and SO, they’re aro.”

Stop that.

Seriously.

Someone may very well have aspd and be ace, or aro, or acearo. But once again, correlation does not equal causation. I do get that on some level it’s understandable to play someone with aspd as aromantic in particular, but the lense is far too narrow, especially when it turns into a “must” situation.

Maybe what you would consider “romantic love” isn’t the same as someone with aspd would consider “romantic love,” but that doesn’t mean that they don’t experience it. Individuals have their own individual identities and definitions. 

There aren’t unbreakable chains attaching aspd, asexuality, and aromanticism together. It is perfectly okay to be all of those things at once or have a character that is all of those things, but please remember that they are all independent traits and are spectrums that show themselves in a variety of ways.

Also, don’t call being aromantic or asexuality a mental illness. Seen that one making the rounds again too and it’s fucking stupid. Stop it and just admit to being ace/arophobic so I can block you and move on.

~Disclaimer that I am NOT a psychologist, just a tired bastard.~