#can my favorite characters stop crashing out and taking space crack?? please???

[clownbastard]

He promised himself that he would never be weak again, but most of the examples of bravery in his life were either thinly veiled cruelty or a complete lack of emotion... No wonder he turned out like this.

Sorry for the tiktok watermark, but for some reason, capcut didn't let me add music when I was editing this, so I had to improvise. Also had a different song in mind, but whatever.

[hinac0lada]

LET’S FALL IN LOVE FOR THE NIGHT

900 SPECIAL  — LET’S FALL IN LOVE FOR THE NIGHT

CHARACTER PAIRING: AKAASHI KEIJI X READER

WARNINGS: none

ALEX’S NOTE: hello lovely people! me and riss would like to thank you for helping us reach 900!! thank you all for appreciating our works and giving it some love. to compensate, i decided to post this song fic i made which was inspired by FINNEAS’ - Let’s Fall In Love For The Night  . if you can, please do listen to it while reading the fic, enjoy!

"he broke up with me, i should've seen this coming" i heard you say, a dry laugh coming from the other line, and then silence. i fiddled around with my fingers, worried about your state of mind. i knew this was coming, you were blinded with the love you had for that douche, but i could never blame you for loving someone. it was his fault, after all, for not seeing how amazing you are.

i sighed at the sound of your sobs that you struggled to suppress. we've been in situations like these before where you'd call me in the middle of the night after a heated argument, while i try to convince you to at least take a break from your relationship, but then i fail miserably because you adored that son of a gun too much. and in the end, you'd tell me you'll endure the pain until you couldn't.

i should get used to it by now, but no matter how repetitive this circumstance gets, i could still feel my blood boil every time i imagine the sight of you, sobbing on the floor of your shared apartment in a dimly lit room, all alone. all because of your loving boyfriend.

"k-keiji, i should've listened t-to you..i prepared for this moment, but why does it still hurt?" you managed to let out in between your whimpers. i could hear my heart crack, how could i let this happen to you? this was by far the worst you've ever been in— the lowest of the lows, and i don't want you to be like this anymore. and so, unlike most lonely nights, this time, i'll be by your side.

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"w-what do i do now, keiji? he wants me to move out . ."

"..you can stay with me for a while, and i'm not taking no for an answer, (y/n)."

"..alright alright, thank you so much keiji, i owe you one."

"no problem. now pack your bags, i'll pick you up at 25."

i know it was impulsive of me— maybe even thoughtless as i've forgotten i made plans with bokuto tonight, but i can't just let you swim in your own tears. i want to help you mend your heart, which i should've done long ago .

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exactly 25 minutes later, i arrive in front of the apartment complex you once shared with your— now ex— lover. your tear-stained face, accompanied with puffy red eyes that usually radiated joy was filled with deep melancholy, a complete contrast to your lively visual.

i hastily got out of the car, intending to help you with your luggage until i was greeted with a tight embrace, you clung onto me as though your life depended on it, with your face buried in my chest.

your tears poured like waterfalls, soaking my shirt. but i didn't mind, this was nothing but a piece of fabric compared to how much i value you. but how could he let you, a literal angel— a goddess if you will, disregard you just like that? how could he turn a blind eye to your selflessness just for his selfish desires?

i regained my composure, gently wrapping my arms around your quivering figure, shaking from your uncontrollable sobs. i caressed your hair and rubbed soothing circles on your back, whispering sweet nothings into your ear in an attempt to calm your frustrations.

i know you're trying your best not to burst right then and there, in the front passenger seat of my car. the drive was tranquil yet i could feel the slow, burning tension. i could sense the way you're choking back the lump in your throat from how loud your heart thumped in your eardrums while you tried distracting yourself by looking out at the city lights as they passed by in a blur.

i reached out for your hand while my other kept steady on the steering wheel, keeping my focus on the road. a smile made its way onto my lips, eyeing your flushed cheeks from the corner of my eyes. "let's forget about that jerk for now. why don't we have fun tonight?" i questioned, coming to a halt once the traffic light flashed red.

my gaze shifts from the road to your expression, feeling the heavy weight on my chest uplift, relieved to finally see you grinning. pools of (e/c) getting more vibrant every second, your grip on my hand tightening. a glimpse of green flared— a 'go' signal.

as if on queue, the radio played your favorite song, making me quietly sing along, hoping you would join in eventually. and when you did, the atmosphere shifted into a more gleeful one, the car ride filled to the brim with singing and laughter, your honey coated voice sounding like a beautiful song that i would never get tired of.

i still don't know how we went from eating to our heart's content, to end up doing karaoke. purple and pink neon lights set the mood of the room, your voice echoed throughout the small space, swaying your hips to the beat.

you're such a strong person, it's crazy. it's like the heartache you felt just hours ago, never was there in the first place. i've always admired how even if you went through the depths of hell and back, at the end of the day, you'd pick yourself back up and stay optimistic through your hardships.

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"keiji come on, sing with me!"

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you snapped me out of my thoughts and tugged me towards you, handing me a microphone. your sunny disposition has a way of rubbing off on those around you. i'm not one to let loose easily, but miraculously, it only takes you to let out this side of mine. it started off as just you, but then it transitioned to a duet. and now we're having a full blown mini concert.

the night was still young, we're unproblematic and carefree, not caring of what lies ahead for tomorrow. will we ever know?

"sometimes i wishhis mom just swallowed him.."

"y/n!"

"what? you'd wish the same too.."

"..yeah, you're not wrong about that"

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you cackled while i chuckled along with you. it's 1 am and we got back with a tub of ice cream which we impulsively bought after the karaoke session. we sat on the couch in our pajamas, putting on a random TV show even though we weren't planning on watching, instead, i opted to listen to you venting about your ex, making commentary here and there.

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"looking back, i don't really know what i saw in that jerk.."

"i guess you could say, love does make you go blind"

"does love make you blind, or is love blind?"

"i don't know, maybe both?"

time flew by fast and all our nonsense to intellectual conversations resulted in us trying to finish the gallon of ice cream while watching some TV series. i observed your eyes trying to blink away the feeling of tiredness, the activities of today starting to wear you down and make you lethargic. your constant yawning and droopy eyelids was a dead give away, you were like a child trying to stay awake.

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"you're too resilient, you need to get your rest soon."

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i chuckled quietly at your 23rd yawn, you rubbed your eyes sleepily. i turned the tv off before i led you to the guest bedroom, with your presence trailing behind me. upon entering, you settled down in the bed, arranging the pillows and sheets to your liking.

"well, i hope you have a good night's rest, y/n," i began to take my leave, heading for the door, however, i was stopped when you grabbed onto my wrist. i looked over my shoulder to meet your pleading eyes, those eyes that i could never resist. "keiji, i don't think i'd be able to sleep by myself tonight.."

"i-i mean..you don't have to stay the whole night if you don't want to, i just, really need someone's presence right now, at least until i fall asleep." you struggled maintaining eye contact with me, your cheeks vividly tinted with pink despite the dimly lit room. i was reluctant at first, not because i don't want to, but because it was quite unexpected.

"hm? ..sure, since you asked. i won't turn you down, ever." with that being said, i slowly but hesitantly got in the sheets, while you shifted, trying to get in a comfortable position. it was all foreign to me, feeling someone's warmth beside me in this cold bed, but i eventually got used to it. we laid there in silence, enjoying each other's company as we tried to doze off.

"i'm so stupid." i looked at you, a rueful smile displaying your beautiful features as you glanced up at the ceiling of my apartment room. i hummed in response, a sign for you to elaborate. in my eyes, you're definitely nowhere near stupid.

"so stupid for ever choosing someone i love rather than someone who loved me. an imbecile not to realize he's right beside me through everything. the highest form of stupidity, was when i kept denying my feelings for you all this time."

is this a dream? i must be dreaming, right? if it was, i never ever want to wake up.

"the look on your face definitely tells me you think this is a dream, am i right or am i right?"

you turned on your side to face me, the once bittersweet smile replaced by your signature cheeky grin. i felt my breath hitch, our faces just inches away from each other.

with your features up close, it was much more breathtaking than it already was from before. i want to say something, but why can't i?

"k-keiji, i know this is sudden, and maybe you've moved on and all, i can't blame you if you did. if it isn't too late, maybe we could fall in love for th-"

i crashed my lips with yours, cutting you off mid sentence whilst gently cupping your face in my hands. i feel your hands making its way to my hair, gently brushing through and tugging at it.

what am i doing? what has gotten into me? but whatever this is, i hope you and i never regret this night, or any nights we spent together. i know better than to ever call you mine, but maybe this time, this moment at least, i have the chance to. is it too selfish of me to think that?

we eventually pulled away, catching our breaths, in the process, my eyes never left yours. to tell you the truth, i'm the fool, the stupid one. stupid for running away from my feelings, stupid for not taking the risk and tell you how much i've loved you ever since. but it's better late than never,

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". . how about we fall in love for the rest of our lives?"

GENERAL TAGLIST: 

@pyblos​ @some-oxymoron​ @kxgeyamasmilk​ @kunimwuah​ @hakueishirei​ @rollingthundaa​

[justsomevoltronstuff]

FINALLY SOMEONE WITH OPEN REQUESTS THANK YOU 🥰🤗 This will suddenly take a dArK tUrN- can you do a Paladins (and Allura) x dying reader? Haha idk but I'm in it for the angst and crying 👌👏 You seem like a wonderful person so keep on being wonderful (*˘︶˘*).｡*♡

my cousin gave me the BIGGEST judgemental side eye when she asked what I was writing about and I told her character deaths, I’m tryna not to fite, y’all I ain’t gonna lie imma throw hands frfr

also, so sorry this took so long, I’m pretty sure I rewrote it like five times tryna get it to my damn satisfaction (which is such a nasty habit, don’t reread you’re own shit if you want an honest opinion on it y’all)

also also, I’m on mobile rn so I can’t cut it so just so all y’all know:

DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO DEATH/GRIEVING. THIS IS LITERALLY ALL ABOUT DEATH AND GRIEF AND IT IS MAJOR SAD BOI HOURS AND I WORRY ABOUT YALL AND DONT WANT YOU READING THIS IF YOU KNOW YOU WONT HANDLE IT WELL😤😤😤

this is a long one bois so if you wanna skip around they’ll all be colored as per usual and the order is: Shiro, Lance, Hunk, Keith, Pidge, Allura

please enjoy lovers🥺💜🌸

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The battle wasn’t an easy one by any means, it was touch and go for the whole team. You knew it wasn’t gonna end well, but that had never stopped you from putting forth your all. You swung your weapon, keeping your enemies at bay as much as you possibly could. Your team was all over the place, the enemy having succeeded in separating everyone in hopes of tipping the odds in their favor. It worked.

You couldn’t keep up alone. Fighting had always been instinct to you, you had never felt so overwhelmed as you had in that moment. They were closing in and you had nowhere left to go and no tricks left up your sleeve. You were stuck, and there weren't any quick enough plans to keep you out of harm's way this time.

You held your ground for as long as you could, refusing to give in easily. You fought until your limbs were too exhausted to move and your breathing was too shallow to continue. It was in a moment of hesitation from sluggish movements that they finally overtook you, and you felt pain spread through you, worse than any you had ever felt before.

You heard shouts of panic, you listened as the battle got thicker and the enemy retreated, you smiled at the sound of victory. Your team shouted in excitement, another battle well fought, another win for Voltron.

Attempting to sit up, you felt pain rush your body once again, causing you to groan. Your team's cheers quickly died down as they took in your situation. Before you knew it, your head was being cradled by the person you wanted to see the most at this moment. Their eyes were filled with concern and tears were brimming. You attempted a soft smile, in hopes of comforting them. Your breathing was shaky as the brushed your hair away from your eyes.

“You’re going to be okay.” They promised.

Your last thoughts were of your family, earth, the realization you’ll never feel rain on your face again, of your team, who you hated abandoning, and finally, of the one person you hated leaving the most. You knew you weren’t making it out of this one, you despised you were going to pass in their arms. You wished you could turn back time and fight a little harder, you wished things could be different, that you could live the life the two of you dreamed together.

“Don’t blame yourself.” You whispered in response.

They shook their head in defiance. “Don’t talk like that. We’re gonna get you to the castle and into a med pod and you’re going to be good as new in no time.”

You shakily lifted a hand and brushed a tear from their cheek. “I love you.”

Their face was filled with pain and you knew the only thing keeping them from losing it was this being your final moments. “I love you.” They responded, their voice cracking. They leaned down and gently pressed their lips to yours.

You felt everything around you becoming further and further away.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered out to your team as you took a final shaky breath, your senses being overwhelmed as you felt yourself fading.

Shiro

The tears kept flowing as he watched the light fade from your usually bright, curious eyes. He pulled you into him as he sobbed into your shoulder, wishing you’d wrap your arms around him and tell him everything was okay, that there was no reason to cry. But you didn’t, and you never would again. Your team surrounded the two of you, tears running down their cheeks as well as they watched their leader completely break in front of them, their friend tucked in his arms unmoving.

He tried to move on. He knew you wouldn’t want him blaming himself or wallowing in misery on your behalf. He mourned you, he still does, but he needs to keep leading the team, he doesn't have time to let the memories of you being by his side drag him into complete uselessness.

It was hard, it took a long time, but eventually he could remember you, his lover, his everything, without crumpling immediately.

When the team got back to earth, it was raining. He stood outside, face tilted to the sky, just letting the water drench him. The rain reminded him of you, you always told him it was what you missed most about earth.

It was as he stood outside, head facing the endless clouds, lighting striking in the far off distance, enduring the first rainstorm he’d felt since before the Kerberos Mission, that he smiled for the first time since the morning before your final battle.

Lance

Once you had taken your final breath and your gentle hand slipped off his, all composure he had left was out the window. He screamed and sobbed in the middle of that battlefield. His team knew he had a tendency to keep his emotions at bay, so watching him break over your body, knowing there was nothing they could do to help him, was heartbreaking. They all shared his grief, but none on a level even close to him.

You had been his rock, you helped him keep sane and reminded him he wasn’t a horrible person. He sobbed harder as he remembered how excited you were to meet his family once all of you went back to earth.

After a while he just, stopped. He had run out of tears, he had his moment of grief, he had to stand tall and move on now. Or at least that’s what everyone saw. Every single day of his life, he blamed himself. If only he hadn’t let himself get separated from you, if only he’d gotten to you a little sooner, if only, if only, if only. In the end, he knew there was no changing the outcome, but that didn’t stop him from imagining worlds in which you were still by his side.

He never thought he’d dread finally going home, but as the team landed, and a woman that looked eerily familiar came rushing from the building towards them, he felt himself snap. HE crashed to his knees as the woman came up to the group, looking around at each of them.

“Where are they?” she demanded. “Where is my child?” She had tears in her eyes as she noticed Lance on his knees, holding back tears and hugging himself.

“I’m so sorry ma’am,” Shiro started but she just shoved him away.

“You let them die?! My child died in outer space, surrounded by a bunch of strangers, and you didn’t even try to save them?!” She had tears rushing down her cheeks. “Who do you even think you are? Do you think you deserve to ball up because of them? You don’t even know them! No, nevermind, yes, you do deserve to be down there, not out of pity, but out of remorse. This is all your fault, all of you! My child never should’ve come to this stupid place.”

He flinched as he took in the woman's words.

“That is enough ma’am. Your child died honorably, saving people, and they were our family. We aren’t just some strangers, we’re the people your child died for. So, in all due respect, I suggest you back away from your child's mourning lover and stop slandering the life they died protecting.”

Everyone shut up in shock as Keith put your mother in her place, causing her to take a deep shaky breath, tears slipping from her eyes at last as she took in his words.

Hunk

Your hand slipped out of his as your eyes fluttered shut for the final time. He didn’t rage, he didn’t scream or burst, he just silently held you a little longer, his tears running down his cheeks until they ran dry. He didn’t have the energy to leave you yet, he never thought you’d be the one to go first.

The team didn’t know what to do, Hunk had always been the emotional one of the team, never being shy with showing his feelings. He wore his heart on his sleeve without regret, but now, he just looked emotionless.

He tried to distract himself. He threw himself into engineering projects and every mission the team ran he put everything he had into completing. He stopped cooking all together, every time he even so much as looked at the kitchen door, his heart would break slightly more. Memories of the two of you spending hours in that room, cooking with space goo and assorted ingredients you found. It hurt too much to attempt doing something you were both passionate about without you.

He was silent as they finally made it back to earth, his family welcomed him home, having adr him his favorite dessert and everything, but he just didn’t have the heart to enjoy it. The two of you had spent countless hours sharing stories and memories and things you wanted to eat when you finally made it back, and that banana cake had been the one thing you couldn’t wait to try.

He cried himself to sleep that night, wishing he could change the past. It was difficult for him to find something to fight for, a future without you having been something he hadn’t considered since the two of you met at the Garrison all that time ago. He came to the conclusion that his heart would never recover, but that wouldn’t stop him from fighting for the future you so easily described to him, a future where aliens and humans could live in peace, where the Galra weren’t an enemy, where the two of you could live out blissful lives together, having done your time in a war that wasn’t supposed to be yours.

Keith

His breath got shallow as yours ceased, his heart racing as your own stopped all together.

“This can’t be happening. Y/n please! Please open your eyes. Please,” his broken sobs echoed as the Paladins watched him plead with your lifeless body.

They didn’t know what to do. The normally stoic red paladin was shattering before their own eyes, more emotions flooding him than they expected to be possible. It was heartbreaking to say the least.

They had all lost one of their own that day, but none felt it more than the broken boy.

You were his family. You stuck by him on earth when no one else would, you left the Garrison with him just so he wouldn’t be alone, where there was him, there was you, and now you were gone, and he didn’t know how to cope without you.

He changed. He was already pretty closed off from the rest of the team, he never really smiled a lot, he wasn’t an extremely emotional person, but after his outburst that day, he completely shut off everything. Jokes that Lance would tell that would once make him smirk fell on deaf ears, even Hunks cooking and Shiros dadly advice didn’t pull him out of it.

The team learned to just work around his new behavior, wishing he’d go back to being a hothead or something. Anything.

He pushed his hardest on every mission, fighting as though he had absolutely nothing left to lose, because, in his mind, he didn’t. He felt alone in a universe out to get him, he knew he had friends, a team, even family now, but he didn’t have you, and nothing would be the same because of that. He would never be the same reckless, hotheaded, careless red paladin he once was, because he did all of that stuff knowing you’d either back him up or smack him upside the head.

Everyone told him time would ease the pain, but as he brought flowers to the memorial grave they created for you, on the anniversary of that day, he knew that no amount of time given to him would ease the pain he still felt. Because he was too painfully aware that all of that time given to him was time taken from you.

Pidge

Pidge was never exactly one to attach to people, not really, and definitely not so emotionally. Attachment to robots? Sure. But human beings were a whole lot more difficult. Which is why when the two of you admitted to being in a relationship, no one saw it coming or knew what to expect, it was completely uncharted territory.

And now, as Pidge was hovering over your body, swearing to find a way to help you, they once again didn’t know what to do.

Pidge sobbed and made halfhearted promises, telling you that you were going to be okay, but knowing you weren’t, and you never would again. It took the entire team to pry Pidge off your dead body, Pidge immediately begging them to let go, just needing to be near you.

After the shock of it all wore off, Pidge holed up in the garage/workspace, working on this project and that, trying desperately to keep distracted, but nothing worked. Every single thing held a memory, every memory brought you back to life, and every memory would ease and you would just vanish all over again.

Countless nights were spent wrapped up in your clothes, with your blanket, in your/on your side of the bed, weeping into the familiar smell of you. Pidge didn’t express emotions very well, but it was obvious this time. The distracted mindset, the distant gazes, the quiet sobs no one else was supposed to hear, all of it made it glaringly obvious that Pidge was not okay.

Pidge took to wearing your clothing more often than not, determined to keep any and every part of you alive so the memories of you would never fade.

Pidge was never one to attach to people, but Pidge also never imagined a life where you weren’t in it.

Allura

She watched you drop from the other side of the battlefield, a heartbreaking shriek escaping her throat as she watched you fall. In her mind you were supposed to be invincible, you were her wonderful significant other that gave her a reason to keep going, you were always telling her that everything was gonna turn out the way it’s supposed to, that the two of you were gonna make it through anything that could possibly be thrown your way.

She ruthlessly fought her way to you, no longer caring for leaving as little harm as possible. They hurt you, they didn’t deserve her sympathy. Once she finally got to you, the battle had ended and the other Paladins had joined her in surrounding you.

“Help me get them to the pods.” Allura pleaded, clutching your lifeless body. “They have to be okay. They can be healed, we just need to get them to the pods.” She was frantic, emotional, scared, and panicking.

Keith gently grabbed her shoulder. “They’re gone, Allura. They’re already gone.” The Red Paladin pulled her into his arms and let her release everything that day.

Everything following was a blur. The team moved forward with plans and missions, Allura never missing a beat. There were points when the team was concerned with how well she seemed to be doing, she lost her lover and was seemingly perfectly okay. But late at night, if they listened close enough, they could here the stifled, choked sobs of the princess as she got out all the pent up emotions in preparation for the next exhausting day of not letting her personal life interfere with the mission.

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I might be the only one that got emotional™️ during this one, but I hope you all enjoyed🌸

~Admin Rori💜

[talpup]

I just found read your crossroads fic over on Ao3, and damn sweetheart, I am in LOVE with this classy mob styled version of Overhaul you have going on. The smut in that last chapter was abso-fucking-lutely to die for! But I really need to know something about his character in this story. He was obviously a virgin, but r there any specific kinks he’s been thinking about or planning on trying with her?

*blush* THANK YOU!!!  You can blame my good friend and favorite Kai fanfic author @inorganicone2230 They’re the one that spurred me into having the idea for this fic and then (like they’ve done with all my bnha fics) encouraged me to write it and brainstormed with me.

Yes, Kai was a virgin. Though his skill level might test some folks suspension of disbelief (something I try not to do too much in my fics, even though I write mostly fantasy).

Kai’s kinks in this fic might be fairly tame by our standards.  But it is a 1920′s era au fic.  Don’t really know if they’re kinks; but Kai would love to spank Maya then bend her over his desk and…

...so I don’t know if you saw my post.  But I decided to do a short smutty scenario thanks/inspired by this ask.  So here you go.  Sorry it’s so short.  Between having my ‘poison juice’ (aka infusion) last Friday and unexpected visitors yesterday and the day before I’ve been kinda wiped.

FYI this little scene would take place after things settled a bit from the last and (eventual) upcoming chapter.

WARNINGS: spanking, non-con, creampie, cockwarming;  Please remember, this fic is rated explicit and has warnings of sex, violence, and other possible triggers.  For a full list of story tags please check the fics AO3 (link to that at the top of my tumblrs homepage).

Promised Pleasure

Removing his dust mask as Maya entered his office, Kai frowned at her attire. “That’s not what I told you to wear today.”

Maya’s shoulders tensed.  She foolishly hadn’t expected her choice of clothes to be an issue.  She should've known better.  Still, her pride wouldn’t let her apologize.  And she knew Kai would sniff out any lie.

Deciding a gently put truth was best, she stepped further in his office.  “I felt like wearing this.”

Kai’s golden eyes narrowed.  She was testing boundaries again.  And her testing was trying his temper.  “Close the door please, my Dear.”

Despite the politeness of the ask, a shiver ran up Maya’s spine.  Mouth suddenly dry, she turned and closed the door with a shaky hand.

“Lock it.”  Kai ordered, voice taking on a twinge of sharpness.  He had called her in here hoping for a nice diversion.  But with his beautiful girl acting so spiteful he would have to resign himself to giving her a lesson.

Maya’s hand paused on the door.  The hair on the back of her neck prickled.

“Maya. Lock the door, Darling.  You know how I dislike repeating myself.”

The slow scrape of the lock setting in place deafened Maya to everything but her ragged breathing and thundering heart.  She didn’t hear Kai’s next words.  So when she turned back around, it was to find him looking more annoyed then ever.

Smothering her nerves, Maya met Kai’s piercing gaze head on.  “I’m sorry. Did you say something?”

Unlacing his fingers, Kai sat back.  “I told you to come here.  This is the second time I’ve had to repeat myself.  I won’t do so again.”

Maya shuffled hesitantly toward Kai’s desk.

Kai pushed back and slightly turned the chair he was sitting in.  “This side.  Come around near me.”

She moved around the desk, stopping a couple paces from his spread legs. Skin prickling under the caress of his roving gaze, her breath caught glimpsing the bulge in his pants.

At least Kai always brought her pleasure.  Unlike the disgusting landlord who had used her and left without care or glance after.  Kai always made her feel special.  Beautiful.  Loved.  In those moments of heated bliss she lost herself and forgot she was doing this solely for justice for her brother.  Basking in Kai’s twisted affection and the delightful pleasure he gave she’d start to believe she truly cared for him in return.  That they could make something of this.  Possibly enter a real relationship that wouldn’t end when he did as he promised and saw those who killed her brother put down.

Maya stared at the tailored suit jacket hanging over the back of Kai’s chair.  Anything to avoid seeing the twitching cock in his pants.

“Why don’t you serve me some water and unbutton my vest for me, Sweetheart.”

It wasn’t a question, or even a suggestion.  Maya knew well enough it was an order.  But with Kai’s honeyed tone and adoring gaze it was easy to trick her mind into believing there would be no consequences for disobedience.

Turning over a heavy tumbler that sat on a silver tray at the end of his desk, she took up the crystal carafe and poured.  Setting the glass in front of him, her fidgeting hands fell to her side, smoothing her skirt.

Her delay in following his second commend had Kai rising to his feet. Maya stepped back even as she hurriedly reached for his vest, seeking to rectify the offense.  Kai grabbed her wrist before she touched him.

Maya grimaced at the too tight grip.  “I’m sorry.  I--”

Kai pulled her roughly against him.  Maya stumbled, heels catching on the plush area rug.  She fell against his chest.  His expensive cologne assaulted her nose.  She loved the smell but hated smelling it as she only got a whiff when Kai had her in his space.

Suddenly gentle, Kai’s strong arms steadied her.  “Careful, Sweetheart. We don’t want you hurting yourself.”  He caressed her cheek, brushing the hair out of her face with a tenderness that didn’t match the blazing fire in his amber eyes.

Maya held perfectly still, struggling not to flinch. The way Kai flipped from loving and sweet to caustic and hurtful on a penny dime was what frightened her most about him.

Smiling, Kai’s head dipped.  “You’re so beautiful, Darling.  So soft and beautiful.”

His tender lips graced hers in a chaste kiss.  Maya’s lashes fluttered closed accepting the kiss, thinking she had escaped his anger.  Her body jerked at a sudden tug.  The sound of something ripping rang out in the room.  A sudden cold strike of air hit her front torso pebbling her nipples.

Maya’s eyes shot open with a gasping cry.  Kai had rent her blouse and camisole open.

“If you refuse to wear what I tell you to.  Maybe you should be left with nothing to wear at all.”

“Kai… I’m--”

Kai cupped her cheek.  “I don’t want to hear it, Sweetheart.  You apologize and apologize but keep on going astray from the clear, defined rules I’ve set.  My love for you has seen me be more than patient.  But I’m afraid my patience has come to an end.”

Maya stumbled again, her world spinning as she was quickly turned and shoved down against the desk.  The glass of water she served slid off the surface and fell to the floor.  It’s crash accentuated Maya’s surprised cry.  Mind reeling, she didn’t feel the splash of water soak her hose.

“Ka—ah!” She broke off with a scream, senses assaulted by the sound of her tearing skirt.  The cold hard desk against her breast and torso and Kai’s painful grip on the back of her neck.  Her nose burned, eyes watering from the lingering smell cleaner that clung to the polished surface.

Hand still holding her down, Kai dropped her ruined skirt.  His freed hand slid over the silky slip she worn.  So soft, he mused.  But not anywhere as soft as the flesh beneath.  That covering was pulled down along with her panties.

“Kai! What are you--”  Maya broke off with another shouted cry.

The crack of his hand hitting her ass echoed about the room.  Maya’s back arched at the blooming fire but was roughly pushed back down against the desk.

“Stay, my Love.  You wouldn’t want to upset me further and earn yourself another lesson after this.”

Wiping tears from her eyes, Maya tried to look back at him.  For a moment she swore she saw a horrid bird-like beast in place of her handsome tormentor.  But the monstrous vision was gone quicker than she could blink.

“Le—le—lesson?” She stammered.

“For continually testing your bounds.”  Kai leaned forward, low rasp tickling her ear.  “I’m afraid this will hurt, my Dear.  But know, that it will hurt me to do it more than it’ll hurt you.”

Ass still stinging from the first spank Maya doubted that.  By the third strike she was certain Kai enjoyed it and was glad for the chance to discipline her supposed disobedience.  Confirmation of his delight came when he paused after the fourth hit and ran a hand over her blazing butt-cheeks.

Kai’s fingers traced the red marks, trailing over the rising welts.  He loved Maya’s perfect, soft skin.  But there was a possessive pride in seeing her flesh temporarily marred by the work of his hand.  It sparked something primal in him, turning his tender caress into a rough, digging grope.  She was beautiful, his beloved.  A perfect little darling that would fit so well beside him in the new wholesome world he was working to usher in.  Or at least she would be once she learned to listen and obey without hesitance or question.

No one but him could touch her.  Certainly no one else was allowed to see her in such a weakened and debauched state.  Kai growled at the thought, fingers digging into the meat of her ass.  He would gouge the persons eyes out.  Cut out their tongue, and break their knees and fingers.  Then grant them a slow, painful death for having seen his darling like this.  Because this…  His other hand loosened and trailed down her neck, slinking around her side to cup her breast, reveling in the weight as she lifted a bit thinking they were done.   ...this was for him, and him alone.   His throbbing dick ground against her raw ass.

Maya’s lips pressed together between clenched teeth, biting back a cry at the burning pain.  Halfway into righting herself her back bumped Kai’s chest.

Weight rested on his hand planted to her side on the desk, Kai’s chin hooked over her shoulder.  “Think you’ve learned your lesson, Beautiful?”

Breast heaving with a shuddering breath, Maya nodded.

“Doesn’t appear so.  You know how I prefer worded responses.”

“Yes!” Maya expelled.  “Yes.  I’ve learned my lesson.  Please, Kai. I’m sorry.  So very sorry.  It won’t ever happen again.”

Kai’s knuckles glided down her back.  Other hand gripping her hip he pulled her blistered ass against his leaking erection.  “Why don’t we test that?  Bend over, Sweetheart.”  Annoyed as he was by her hesitance, he smiled lightly.  “Either you haven’t learned your lesson.  Or liked it so much you want another.”

Before Maya could respond she was pushed and held down on the desk.  Her eyes shot wide at the resounding spank.  Fresh tears sprang from her eyes as they squeezed shut at the sharp boiling pain.  “Kai! Please!  I’m--”

Another hit landed.  Then another.

Kai stopped after the tenth.  Staring down at her trembling frame he had a moments regret.  He should have made her count.  Next time, he told himself.

He loosened his tie and unbuttoned his vest.  Amber eyes skimmed over his handy work.  Just when he thought she couldn’t be more beautiful…  Even her mix of drool and tears puddled on the desk were lovely.

Lost in the consuming tumble of dull thudding pain accentuated by sharp stinging bursts, Maya didn’t hear the jangle of Kai’s belt being undone.  She jolted at his hand slipping between her legs. Whimpering as his prodding fingers dragging through her folds.

Kai frowned at the minimal moisture.  Usually Maya got so wet for him. It wounded and upset him.  But before those emotions could take root his eyes drifted back to the pool of saliva on his desk.  His heart lightened.  Even with her punishment his darling had thought of him and his needs.  Proving she loved him as much as he loved her.

He leaned over her and kissed her tear-stained cheek.  “Thank you, my Dear.  You’re so sweet and good for me.”

Maya’s lashes fluttered.  She watched Kai’s hand trail through her drool, gathering it.

Bringing his wet hand to his freed length, Kai slathered her saliva over his shaft.  He grimaced, skin prickling with the beginnings of a inch. But soothed himself that was Maya.  She was clean.  Worthy.  His.

It’s like indirect oral, he thought with a steadying breath.  The prickling itch diminished then fully disappeared as he focused on Maya, pumping his fist to fully wet his cock.

Lining up his cock he leaned back over her and kissed her shoulder.  “You’ve had you’re punishment, Darling.  And you took it so well.  Now, let me remind you of my love and the pleasure I can give.”

Maya’s shining eyes flicked to Kai’s.  Her brow furrowed.  Was it the light?  Or was there a dim otherworldly glow in those honeyed depths? The image of the demon Dabi’s bright burning eyes flashed through her mind.  But it vanished in an instant from the breach of Kai’s fat cock head.  She would've cried out at the burning stretch if her breath hadn’t seized in her lungs.

Kai hissed at the pull of his sensitive skin.  Maya’s drool helped. But it didn’t provide the smooth silky glide her delicious arousal did.  Wanting the discomfort over with he snapped his hips flush against her, driving his length in her tight hole.

Fully sheathed, Kai slowly exhaled.  His eyes closed, head rolling back. Taking a moment to simply feel, he basked in her velvety embrace.  This would never get old. Slipping his aching cock into Maya’s perfect, tight pussy.  Feeling her walls stretch to make room for him then flutter as they adjusted to his penetrating presence was something that consumed his thoughts; just like everything else about her.

Maya mewled the most pitiful whine beneath him and Kai lost it.  His darling was just so sweet.  So beautiful.  So helpless.

His hips pulled back and slammed right back against her.

If asked, Maya wouldn’t have been able to say if her scream was from the hard thrust or Kai’s pelvis pounding into her blazing red backside.

Her back arched, lifting her off the desk.

One hand gripping her hip, Kai’s other hand grabbed the back of Maya’s neck and shoved her back down.  Never once did his ramming thrusts stop.

The once dulling pain of Maya’s welted ass sharpened again.  Fresh tears seeped from her eyes.  Kai had lied.  He had said she had her punishment.  The pain was suppose to be over.  But every thrust was just another spank.  Until…

Kai’s feet shifted.  Angling his hips he hit that spot in her that had her seeing stars.

Pleasure mixed with the pain.  The rough scrape of his trousers zipper didn’t hurt as badly.  Even the occasional jab of his belts buckle didn’t make her want to crawl up and die.

Kai almost reached around to finger her clit.  But an idea struck him. It was scandalous.  But so was fucking his darling over his desk.  He groaned, cock twitching at the thought.  His pace sped seeking his own release without a care for hers.

Maya rocked against the desk.  Her hips started to push back against him despite the blazing pain to her ass.  A different kind of heat pooled in her belly.  But just as the coil started to tighten another warmth filled her.

Kai thrust deep inside Maya, cock coming alive.  He grunted, pushing his hips firmly against her, driving her against the desk, seeking to get even deeper as hot ropes of cum spit from his pulsing cock.

Building orgasm lost, Maya deflated atop the desk.  Her nails clawed at the polished surface, hands balling into weak fists.  Though grateful it was over, she couldn’t help but be bit bitter about Kai’s second lie.  ‘...let me remind you of my love and the pleasure I can give.’ Yes, she had felt some pleasure.  But she hadn’t gotten her full pleasure.

She waited for Kai to pull out.  When he didn’t she looked back at him.

Kai greeted her with a smug smile.  “You didn’t cum.  Did you?”

Maya’s mouth fell open.

Before she could respond, her torso was pulled up off the desk.  Heated as his skin was through his button-up shirt, Maya shivered the instant her back touched his chest.

Kai’s arms wrapped around her.  He held her firmly against him, keeping his cock snugly inside her.   His lips brushed the shell of her ear. “Did you think I forgot about my promise, Sweetheart?  I said I was going to remind you of the pleasure I can give.”

Keeping her glued against him, Kai retook his seat.  Head a whirl of confusion, Maya barely grimaced at the discomfort of his softening cock shifting inside her.  The heated pain of her abused butt numbed by her racing mind trying to figure out what Kai was doing.

Soon enough she got her answer and wished she never had.

“I’m a man of man word, my Love.  What do you say you keep me warm while I do some work?  Then I can give you that promised pleasure.”

After this, Kai might develop a breeding kink to go with spanking, rough office sex, and cokwarming.

Comments and reblogs are always appreciated.

Thank you all for being so patient with me and the posting of this fic.  Special thanks to Anon for the ask and inspiring this one shot.  And as always, an extra special thank you to @inorganicone2230​ for being the best fellow writer friend (and friend in general) and encouraging and brainstorming with me.  I mean it when I say I would’ve given up posting long ago if it wasn’t for your support.

[toomuchtv95]

My Savior Part 4

Characters: Jay Halstead x Reader, Will Halstead

Word Count: 2.1k+

Chapter Warnings:, Fluff, angst, poorly written medical talk 

A/n: Okay I have no idea if the medical condition I gave Y/N, is real or not. It clearly for the propose of this story.

Enjoy! :)

A/N: Excuse any major grammar mistakes hopefully Grammarly caught most of them.

Series MasterList

Life for you was good. Things between you and Jay were even better. 6 months ago, your divorce was finally finalized, which finally gave you the freedom you needed from your past. You haven’t been this happy in a long time and it’s all because of Jay. The guest bedroom went back to being a guestroom and Jay’s bedroom also became yours. You had no idea what the future held for you and Jay, and if you were completely honest with yourself you did think about your future with Jay. You see yourself married and having kids with Jay, and it's crazy that you are even thinking about marrying someone when you just got divorce less than 6months ago. But after the news, you receive today you weren't sure about your future with Jay.

As you crossed the street into the parking lot after your shift, you saw Jay leaning against the hood of his truck. Your heart broke into a million piece and all you wanted to do was cry. “Hey.”

"Hey, beautiful." As you approached Jay, his smile faded when he saw sadness written all over your face. Jay pushed himself away from the truck and you automatically crashed into his chest. As Jay wrapped his arm tightly around you, he could sense that there was something wrong other than a bad day at work. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Just a bad day at work.” You hated lying to Jay, but you didn’t want to tell Jay the truth just yet, because of the fear of losing him again. “Can we just go home?”

“Yeah, okay.” Jay wanted to know what was bothering you, but Jay was going to give you the space you needed and let you come to him when you were ready.

The ride home was quiet which is what you needed to wrap your head around the news you had received this afternoon. Once the two of you were home, Jay went to order pizza while you decided to jump into the shower. As you turned on the water, you stripped out of your clothes and got in the shower and let the warm water hit your body.  Brick by brick, your walls started to come back down after you had just finished repairing them. You broke down. The sobs punched through, seeping through every crack. You pressed your forehead against the wall of the shower and closed your eyes. You don't know how long you were in this position before you pushed away and gathered yourself before finishing up in the shower.

“Hey, the pizza is here.” Jay appeared in the doorway behind you as you finished getting dressed and towel drying your hair.

“Okay.” Turning around, you placed a soft kiss on his lips before heading out the doorway.

“I’m trying here, but I hate to see your hurt. So, if there something I can do to help-”

“Jake is ruining my life again and he’s not even here. He killed my chances of ever having kids.” The moment those words left your mouth, you saw the shocked look on his Jay from your outburst.

“Woah, what are you talking about?” Jay grabbed your elbow to stop you from leaving without an explanation.

This was not how you want to tell Jay, but you had to get this out in the open before you two get more serious about this relationship. “I had a doctor’s appointment today; you know just a regular OBGYN check and she gave me the news that I never thought I would hear." A tear welled in your eyes as you looked at Jay and you felt your heart sink lower into your stomach. "She asked me if I suffered a miscarriage in the past and I said no and asked why. She told me that it looked like my uterus had scar tissue and it was most liking from a miscarriage.”

“Sweetheart-”

“Jake sometimes use to kick me in the stomach. One night he kicked me because he wasn’t pleased about something, I was in so much pain I thought he had broken a rib. Then the next day, I went to the bathroom and there was blood. At the time I thought it was just my period but now that I think about it-” you stopped mid-sentence as you thought back to that night. Jay placed both his hands on your upper arms and pulled you into his chest. Anger flooded through Jay's body as he held you tight. He wanted nothing more than to take away all the pain that you are suffering from. You pulled away and looked at Jay in the eyes. "There's more…”

"Hey, whatever it is, you can tell me. We will get through this together." Jay wiped away your tears with the pad of his thumb.

“She said that because of the scar tissue that the chances of having a child are low. So, if you want kids, your better off finding someone who can have them.” You didn’t mean for that to come out so harsh, but you were angry and upset. You wanted to be a mother one day, and now you might not get that chance. “I mean we haven’t even talked about kids and marriage and I know it soon to be even talking about it considering I just got divorce 6months ago. But I see a future with you. Do you even want kids? Do you see a future with me?”

“Y/N look at me.” Jay placed both of his hands on the side of your neck and stoked your cheek with the pad of his thumb. Jay looked at you in the eyes and he could see anger and hurt in your eyes. “Your right we haven’t talked about any of that, but yeah I a future with you. The whole package: kids, marriage, maybe even a pet. I love you and never in a million years would I leave you because of this. We will get through this together. I promise."

“And what if I can’t-” Jay cut you off with a passionate kiss. The moment Jay kissed you, the anger and hurt you were feeling had suddenly disappeared. You wrapped your arms around his neck and returned the kiss.

Jay pulled away and leaned his forehead against yours. “Then we will figure it out. Okay?” You nodded head as he pulled you back into a hug. The world around you melted away as you squeezed back, not wanting the moment to end.

“Hey, if this is what you want, I will support you.” Will patted his brother on the back as they stood at the coffee cart outside of the hospital.

“Y/N is the best thing that has happened to me and I know things between us are moving pretty fast, but I want her to know that I am not going anywhere. I love her more than anything in this world.” The man behind the shopping cart handed the brothers their coffees. “You know a couple of weeks ago she thought I was going to leave her.” The two of them walked over to the benches near the flower bed and sat down.

“Why would she think that?” Jay took a sip of his coffee while he debated on tell Will, but Will was his brother and he knew he could trust him. Taking a deep breath, Jay told Will everything that you told him.

“She afraid that she won’t get the chance to be a mother.” Anger boiled underneath his skin at the thought of everything Jake had done to you.

Will could sense his brothers’ anger. Will doesn’t know half of the stuff that Jake did to you, but he knew it wasn’t pretty. “I’ve had a handful of patients that have had similar situations and a lot of them come out with having both health pregnancy and babies.” Will crossed his leg over his knee and turned to face Jay. “I don’t think she thought you were going to leave. I think she was just upset. That kind of news isn’t settling. Especially to Y/N. She just got her life back and all she wants is to share it with you.”

"I know I get it. She just is scared of losing me again after all these years, which is why I want to do this. She’s the one.”

“Oh, I know. You two are meant to be.” Just then Will’s pager went off alerting him that they needed him in the ED. “I gotta get back. Good luck. Don’t screw it up.” Will hopped off the benched as Jay waved goodbye. Jay looked down at his watch seeing that he had the head off to the work.

Today, you had the day off which was nice because you had a bunch of stuff to get done. This morning you had gotten a text from Jay saying he wanted to talk you out to dinner tonight and of course you said yes. Throughout the day you slowly checked off the things on your to-do list, grocery shopping, laundry, and cleaning. When 5 o’clock rolled around, you have finished everything on your to-do list before you headed into the bathroom. After hopping out of the shower, you wrapped yourself in a towel and towel-dried your hair. Then just as you were about to wipe the fog off the mirror, you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist. You smiled as Jay kissed your cheek.

“What’s got you in a good mood?” You leaned forward and wiped away the fog on the mirror while Jay still held onto you.

“What I can’t be happy to see my beautiful girlfriend?” Jay whispered in your ear before he released his grip on you. You turned around and looked at him but before you could say anything Jay planted a kiss on you. "Now go get dress or we are going to late," Jay whispered against your lips before exited the room.

You walked out to the bedroom to see a bouquet of your favorite flowers sitting in a vase of water at your bedside. “Jay Halstead, you amaze me.” You whispered to yourself as you took a sniff of the flowers then went to get ready.

“I can’t believe that the diner was still there after all these years.” Jay decided to take you to the diner where you had your first date back in high school.

“Either could I.” After dinner, the two of you decided to go for a walk across the street at the park which was another place that you two spend a lot of time together back in high school. Both you and Jay walked down the path hand in hand when all of a sudden Jay came to a halt causing you to stop in the middle of the path.

"Jay, what's wrong?" You turned around and all of a sudden your felt like your heart was going to explode in your chest. "Jay…”

As you turned around you saw Jay down on one knee. “I love you more then words can express. I know things are moving fast between us, but I lost you once and I don’t want to lose you again. You mean more to me than anything else in this world. You are my best friend who I fell in love with and I want to build a life with you.” Jay pulled out a little red box and you couldn’t help but cover your mouth in shock. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Y/N Y/L will you marry me?”

Tear build up in your eyes and not from sadness but from joy. Jake never made you feel like this, hell he never even proposed. It was more of a let go to the courthouse and get married. You, of course, wanted a wedding where you could share with friends and family. Jake would have never given that to you. Up until about 8months ago, you never thought in a million years that this moment would be happening. “The answer is yes. Yes, I’ll marry you.” Without hesitation, Jay stood up and slipped the ring on your finger. He lowered his face to yours and our lips met, this was the moment you had imagined for so long. He placed his hand on your waist and drew you closer deepening the kiss. As the two of you parted, you saw the sparkle in his eyes and his lips curve up into a smile and you couldn’t help but smile back.

Tag List: @nervousmemzie @hehurst23 @anamile6878 @esauthor @stephmazz1990 @daenerys-targaryes @bellageorge03 @haileymatthewss @useyourmarners @get0verit @yienell-mariee @olihju @lovelydivs @stuffedcabbagepatch @chrisrandumness @shipatheart @jocelyn1718 @shadyfox242 @boo20-05 @beachfan412 @mheart27 @supyfish @aparkel @httphiddlestan @haleyjs86 @onechicago18 @ladyate @whatisanniedoin @citylightsla @thevelvetseries @wemma554 @samiam9525 @detectiveinchicago @tyzerman91 @foulstatesmandragonbear @spiridakos-wp @katie1996 @glittermakesmesmile @itsdesiree86 @chloebear26 @delcateswift @rosemusic18 @transparentwombathorsedreamer @detective29 @cjhorseback @sgtsophie @onechicagofan20 @katiehud @corie-the-writer @give-jack-a-lightsaber @yzas-stuff

[jasontoddiefor]

Title: Mouse Droids and How To Fix Them – A Quick And Easy Guide [Livestream] Summary: Luke has a Space Youtube Channel and Leia watches his videos to de-stress from a terrible day. Mouse droids are named and the Empire and its terrible quality are dragged through the sarlacc pit. AN: Anyway, did somebody said TIE-Fighter story prequel? No? Too bad.

Leia was a well-composed and well-behaved serene princess right up until the doors of her rooms closed behind her. The moment she was out of sight, she kicked off her shoes with such a force that they soared half across the room and crashed against her wardrobe with a loud crack. She took the pins keeping her braids in place out of her hair and threw them onto the dresser. Then as graceless as a regular fifteen-year-old girl, Leia dropped onto her bed and screamed into her pillow.

Today had been terrible.

Leia hated all the pointless festivities that only ever served to make everyone there feel important and powerful but did absolutely nothing for the people they were supposed to govern. She couldn’t understand how her parents managed it. They were good and selfless people, always calm and serene even when the newest governor was basically spitting one insult after the other at them. Leia always wanted to shout back, it was her first instinct. Idiots who couldn’t be bothered to contribute anything productive or kind, should shut up and stop hindering others from doing their job. Leia had kept her mouth shut of course. She had smiled pleasantly as her mother had taught her and acted as expected from her.

But that didn’t mean that she hadn’t wanted to strip the gloves off her hands and show him how much of a bloodthirsty royal she really was. She shouldn’t have desired it, but it annoyed her so much when others purposefully misunderstood her. It had been a year since she picked her coronation color. When would people finally stop commenting on it?

Yes! Princess Leia Organa had chosen white! She’d forgone five-hundred-years of tradition and picked the color of the snow on Alderaan’s mountains, of ice so cold it burned, of the sheets upon which they wrote the names of their dead.

Leia wore the color of war, mourning and remembrance and she wore it well.

How could she not when the Empire was murdering innocents, subjugating whole worlds and waging an unjust war? Picking green or blue would be an insult upon the suffering she had been forced to witness. She didn’t want to be remembered as another impassive royal, bowing to the whims of the Empire. Leia hadn’t been meant to live in a tyrannizing Empire in which she had to watch her every word and step. She wanted to speak her mind and missed the Republic she never got to experience.

Her parents, while displeased she out herself in such danger, had understood it. Most Alderaanians understood it and supported her, but not that stupid new governor. Instead, he went on and on about her image and character flaws – and worse! Talked about marriage.

Leia was already dead set on staying unmarried. Her parents had been lucky. Despite their marriage being arranged, they’d loved each other. Or maybe they had been in love first and the political advantage of the marriage was just a bonus. Leia didn’t entirely know, but she knew to one hundred percent that all her potential Alderaani suitors sucked. They were arrogant and petty or worse, both of that but way older than her as well. She could marry somebody from a different planet, but the Old Houses would frown upon that and then she’d have to deal with more in-fighting and risk losing control of Alderaan’s society and give the Empire even more access to her planet. It was bad enough as it was.

Groaning, Leia rolled onto her back and got up from her bed again. She’d hate herself in the morning if she didn’t dress out of the fine robes completely. She fetched herself her sleeping clothes and washed the make-up off her face. It felt like taking off uncomfortable armor and she was more than glad to get rid of it. Leia didn’t mind dressing up. As a child, she had loved trying on her parents’ much too large clothes and she still loved picking out dresses together with her mother, but sometimes she wished it all wouldn’t take so much energy.

Redressed, Leia returned to her bed, ready to pretend to fall asleep when she knew that she wouldn’t be able to close her eyes now. Her mind was too unfocused, her thoughts all jumbled up. She laid still and waited until another moment had passed before reaching for her bed stand and pulling out her secret private comm.

Leia had three of them. One for official business, one was the officially private secret comm – the one every important person in the galaxy was supposed to have and hide – and then there was her own, which she used to stay up-to-date with activities unbefitting on an Imperial princess.

She checked the holonet, skimming through articles that made her blood boil and delightfully bright art that called for resistance. She was pleased to notice that more and more Alderaani artists were choosing lighter colors in their barely legal paintings and downright joyful when she saw an account post images of white flags. Those posts would probably be taken down once the meaning behind them spread a little more, but Leia was proud nonetheless. She had caused this, this was her contribution to the Rebellion.

In a better mood already, Leia went through her notifications. She had a few replies to articles she had written and- oh.

 [Notification: Scrap Hunting has started a livestream – 1 Min ago]

Smiling widely, Leia clicked on the link connecting her to the video. The livestream had indeed only started recently, and not even properly. Leia had missed the last one sadly because she’d been in the Core, too far away for Scrap Hunting’s terrible holonet connection to reach. Alderaan was just close enough to Tatooine for Leia to watch them.

She couldn’t quite recall how she had stumbled upon the channel. She had just been clicking through some random videos one day and there it had been. Leia wasn’t all that knowledgeable about ships – her parents had kept a keen eye on her since the Speeder accident she’d had when she was ten – and didn’t really have much access to the hangers either. Droids, on the other hand, Leia knew plenty about. They were everywhere and nobody wanted to live without them, which made them the perfect spies with the right adjustments. Leia knew how to wipe a droid’s memory so clean, it was shinier than any crystal and how to hide protocols upon protocols in their storage. Her favorite droids were C-3PO and the R2D2 unite serving on the Tantive IV. Artoo especially had a lot of personality. Leia needed to sort out her Binary so she could catch all the colorful curses the astromech liked to inflict on people.

The two boys running Scrap Hunting – well, only really Luke actually – were sympathetic. They didn’t talk about droids like they were simple tools and they were proficient in fixing them up. Therefore Leia was very pleased to see that the title of the livestream was Mouse Droids and How To Fix Them – A Quick And Easy Guide. This would be fun, the right kind of distracting noise she needed after such a long day.

X

“Alright, we’re all set up now,” Luke said. “Hello everybody! I’m Luke and welcome to another episode of Scrap Hunting!”

He waved at the recorder and then picked up a small back droid from his table. “This is what today’s livestream will be about! An MSE-series droid! A lot of you guys said you’d like more livestreams and the weather’s been pretty good recently and I fixed the signals so I hope this works out just fine.”

Luke smiled and reached for the first tool lying in front of him. “I decided that fixing up this little guy here should be fine for a shorter video. I don’t have to think so much about what I’m doing and can talk at the same time.”

He began taking off the outer casing of the droid and carefully set it aside. “I know, I know, I’m always talking, but nobody complains about it.” Luke stopped spinning his wrench for a moment to think. “Okay, alright, maybe my uncle complains about it sometimes but that’s what he gets for making me check all the vaporators on my own. Anyway, I talk a lot and so does this chat. Lots of people joining in here! Hi!”

Luke looked through the chat, returned greetings and explained how he had gotten the droid as payment for helping out in a repair shop.

“And I know the owner thought he was just giving me so boring little plaything, but do you know how versatile these MSE droids are?”

X

Leia definitely knew how useful they could be. She grinned when Luke comically shook his head when people began sending in question marks and began belittling the tiny Mouse droids. They made excellent spies, infiltrators and guides. Underestimating them just because they were cute was fatal. Leia was happy when Luke reacted as outraged as she was and began elaborating on what the droids could be used for.

X

“And like, I get sending the droids back when they trigger your instincts, I wouldn’t keep around a droid that reminds me of a womp rat or a krayt dragon.” Luke paused, the half-open mouse droid lying on his lap, and apparently considered his suggestions.

“Okay, maybe I would actually want them. Could you imagine a droid krayt dragon? So cool.”

Luke reached for the nearest datapad and took a few notes, then put it next to him on the table and returned to working on the MSE.

“But yeah, point being: Why did the Aar’aa sell them to the Empire so cheaply? Add some extra software and boom, you can sell them for twice the price. Then you’d even make a bonus. Oh, well, I suppose the Empire at least made a good deal there.”

The MSE droid laid bare now and Luke could easily access its memory. He took his datapad once more and connected it to the droid. After a few seconds, he had access to its memory and immediately frowned.

“Or it did not. What is this programming? I researched what I could find before, downloaded some protocols-“ Luke looked away from his datapad to point down, “-links in the description as always. But just- honestly. Who wrote this protocol?”

He gently knocked his head against the droid’s frame. “I’m so sorry, don’t worry, I’ll speed up your processors.”

X

The next hour, Leia spent listening to Luke ramble on about what changes he made and why. Once or twice she even threw her own suggestions in the chat and watched contently as Luke picked up on them and began to work with them. She wished she didn’t have so many duties and could spend her days doing things she actually wanted, take a more active role in the rebellion. But she supposed that as long as she could escape annoying politicians for a while, she’d be fine.

Leia glanced at her chrono. While it appeared to be midday still on Tatooine, it was already early morning for her. She should head to sleep soon.

Thankfully, the livestream was also wrapping up. Luke had reassembled the droid and screwed the last bolt down.

 “And done!” Luke said and helped up the repaired Mouse droid. “A Quick And Easy Guide to Mouse Droids. Now, the only thing left is repainting and naming it. Same rules as always, highest donator gets to choose the color and the name.”

Leia watched as a lot of people began donating. Some just threw in five credits, just to support the channel. She’d done so before as well. It was only right to help somebody else and give him a thanks after cheering her up. Leia typed the first one, then stopped.

She was tired, had been for at least thirty minutes now, but her mind was finally calm as well. She was still and upset, but not so that she wouldn’t be able to sleep.

Leia shouldn’t waste her allowance on this, but Leia had also had a terrible horrible no-good day and wanted to name that Mouse Droid.

X

“And that was it!” Luke announced. “Many thanks for all your donations. I’ll keep you posted on what my next project will be. Hopefully something a little more interesting than this little buddy here. Now let’s see… The highest donation is one- one thousand credits from @rebelroyal!?”

Luke’s voice was awfully high-pitched, shock visible all over his face. “Is this real- oh gosh. Thank you so, so much! I’m not sure- Many thanks for supporting this channel! You may name any future Mouse Droids I come across, oh Force. Right. Uhm. What is your suggestion?”

Leia eyes her discarded white dress on the floor and chose.

X

History’s eyes on you @ rebelroyal

Paint it white and name it Emmy! Many thanks for all the lovely content you provide.

Little Emmy, it turned out, look much better in white than it did in the awful black so representative for the Empire.

X

[Notification: Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot has mentioned you in a new post]

Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot

I have adopted 4 more mouse droids to keep our ship clean!

Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot

[Foto: Five Mouse Droids standing in front of Luke, who was sitting on the ground, smiling cheerfully. The droid in the middle was Emmy. It was a little banged up and had a couple more scratches. On its right were an orange and a blue droid, freshly painted from the looks of it. On Emmy’s left were two black ones]

@ rebelroyal The orange and blue ones have been painted and named already, care to do the honors for the other two?

X

Leia smiled fondly at the picture and began to type.

History’s eyes on you @ rebelroyal

How about yellow and green? Benny and Penny so it rhymes?

Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot

Done :D

[Foto: The two previously black mouse droids have been painted as well and are furiously cleaning the floor of a ship]

[waywardnerd67]

Let Me Go

Summary: Dean has a huge revelation that may have come too late. Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader Pairing: Dean x Reader Warnings: Angst/Attempted Suicide/Suicide Note/Mention of Self-Harm/Depression/Fluff Word Count: 2405 Prompt: “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.” A/N #1: This is for @amanda-teaches​ 2K Writer + Reader Challenge A/N #2: As always this is unbeta so all mistakes are mine. Likes, comments and reblogs are splendid and I will love you doubly for them! Enjoy!

The vamp case went without a hitch. Dean was washing off his machete before placing it back at his side. Sam was placing the last body on the pyre, the heat warming his skin. Even if it was a pyre full of dead vamps the flames were mesmerizing to Dean.

“I wish (Y/N) was here?” he whispered.

Sam stepped next to him, “Have you noticed she’s been isolating herself from hunting?”

Dean nodded staring at the flames whipping higher into the air. The way the swayed shades of red and orange brighten the dark night. It reminded him of (Y/N). Her vibrant personality, her warmth towards those who were hurting and the fire that burned when she would hunt down evil.

“Dean?” Sam placed a hand on his shoulder bringing him out of his daze.

“Yeah Sammy, I just think after everything she’s lost this past year it’s understandable for her to distance herself. Maybe we all could use a break.” Dean began to walk towards Baby.

They had twelve hours before they were back at the Bunker. Twelve hours for Dean to shallow the ever growing feelings back down in the dark depths of his soul. He did not know exactly when these feelings started but one day he saw her in a whole different light. Her hair seemed to always flow behind her, her eyes shined bright like gems and her laugh was like music to his ears. He found himself always wanting to be next to her or listening to her talk about lore.

Exhaustion was hitting Dean hard as he pulled into the Bunker’s garage. He shook Sam awake before getting his bag from the trunk. When they walked into the hallway Sam went towards his room as Dean walked down to his. He paused for a moment before opening his door as his chest ached slightly. The familiar tug to walk down to (Y/N)’s room had him taking a step away from his door. His eyelids fell heavily changing his mind about checking in with (Y/N).

“I can talk with her in the morning. Even make her favorite pancakes.” he whispered before falling onto his bed drifting off into wonderful dreams where there were no monsters and he could be with the woman he loved.

There was a loud crash from outside his room that had Dean jumping out of bed. Rushing out his door he found plates broken just down the hall.

“DEAN! Help me!” Sam cried out kneeling down at the end of the hallway.

He rushed to Sam’s side when all the air in his lungs evaporated. Lying on the ground was (Y/N) in a pair of sweatpants and one of Dean’s flannels. One of the sleeves was bunched at her elbow revealing line after line of scars healing from recently being etched in her skin.

“Sam, is she…” his heart was pounding in his ears awaiting an answer, “Sam!”

“She has a pulse but it’s faint. We need to get her to a hospital now,” Sam gathered her up in his arms, “Check her room to see if there is a hex bag or anything to tell us what happened to her.”

Dean stood there for a moment watching Sam carry her towards the garage. He rushed towards her bedroom immediately looking in the most likely places a hex bag would be hidden. He noticed her sleep meds were out on her nightstand the bottle opened. His stomach sank as he picked up the bottle.

“No, no, no, no.” He mumbled looking into the empty bottle that was refilled two weeks ago.

The next thing he saw was a letter next to the bottle with his name on it. Picking it up, his hand began to shake seeing her handwriting and vile rose into his throat at the realization of what he was holding. Grabbing the bottle, he stuffed both of them into his pocket running out of her room towards the garage.

As soon as he was on the road he pulled out his phone, “Sammy, she took all of her sleeping meds. S-She tried to…”

“I know Dean. The doctors have taken her back now. How far out are you?” Sam cleared his throat then sniffled, breaking Dean’s heart.

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.” He pressed his foot down further on the gas pedal.

When Dean arrived at Jewell County Hospital, he found Sam sitting in the emergency waiting room with his head in his hands. He lifted his head revealing bloodshot eyes and tears running down his cheeks. Dean’s heart stopped as Sam walked over to him.

“She’s unconscious but they have her stabilized. They’re not sure what kind of damage has been done since we don’t know when she took…” Sam paused running his hand over the back of his neck.

“W-When can we see her?” Dean swallowed the large lump in his throat.

Sam waved his hand to follow him, “We can see her now.”

The brothers were outside her room when Sam paused, “I… I can’t go in there. It’s too much.”

He patted his brother’s shoulder before stepping inside the room. Dean grabbed a hold of the door handle to steady his weakened knees. (Y/N) was lying there with tubes and wires coming from all around her. Slowly, he made his way over to the chair next to her bed sitting before he fell to the ground. Her normal glowing porcelain skin was now the same color as the hospital bed sheets. (Y/N)’s full lips were pale and cracking. The only sound giving him hope was the strong beat of her heart on the monitor let him know she was fighting.

“(Y/N/N), why? Why would you try and take your own life?” he whispered feeling a jab from his pocket.

He pulled out the letter, his hands trembling once again before he opened it.

Dean,

I love you. You’re an amazing, strong, selfless man who would sacrifice himself without thought to save those in need. You saved me. You saved my life from the monsters of this world. I want you to know that what I’ve done has nothing to do with you or Sam. This was my decision. I’m not strong enough to fight off the demons within me. They’re overwhelming me and I could not live with myself if something happened to you or Sam because I was not strong enough.

You’re going to be angry. You’re going to be sad. You’re going to blame yourself and drown in whiskey. Please, for me, don’t do that. You couldn’t have done anything to save me this time. Don’t hold onto my memory. You are the only person on this earth that could keep me tethered to it. I love you so much. I know you will move on from this and find someone who is strong enough to be by your side.

Promise me, Dean… promise me that you will let me go. I can’t fight it anymore. You have to let me go.

Love, (Y/N)

Tears dropped onto the paper making the ink bleed. Clutching the letter to his chest he grabbed her hand resting beside her pressing it to his forehead. A painful sob escaped his lips as a wave of fresh tears flowed down his cheeks.

“(Y/N), I didn’t know. I-I didn’t know how much pain you were holding in. I should have seen it. I should have been there. (Y/N), I need you with me. Sammy needs you. We don’t want a life without you. I can’t… you need to wake up because I can’t do this without you. I love you, (Y/N) (Y/L/N). I’m in love with you and I need you by my side.”

His eyes snapped up when he felt her squeeze his hand. A soft groan escaped her lips as her eyes slowly opened. She tried to speak but only a hoarse breath came out.

“Hold on (Y/N), I’ll get a nurse.” He kissed her knuckles before rushing out into the hallway.

Six Weeks Later

Dean was leaning against Baby waiting for (Y/N) to come out the familiar beige door. The last six weeks had been difficult for them all. Sam was working cases with Jodi and Donna while Dean stayed behind at the Bunker. (Y/N) was admitted to the Behavioral Health Unit for seven days of intense therapy before being released into an out-patient program.

Everyday, Dean visited her in the hospital listening to her talk about her sessions and taking home the drawings she had. While at the Bunker, he cleaned up her room making sure it was ready for her return. Every drawing or poem she gave him was placed in a notebook for whenever she was ready to see them. During her first day home, they walked throughout the Bunker for every hiding place she had with a sharp object.

I want to make sure I’m not tempted to do anything stupid. She had said as they placed a lock on one of the cabinets in the kitchen.

Each day was easier than the next. Dean gave her space even though his body urged him to be next to her at all times. He knew she did not need a babysitter but each morning he woke up in a cold sweat rushing out to see she was still there. Every morning he found her safely in her bed sleeping peacefully. They would eat breakfast together and work on finding information for Sam. Thursday was deemed movie night and they would curl up on his bed to watch whatever movie she picked. They found a new normal for them.

Never once did he bring up her letter saying she loved him and she never said if she heard him in the hospital finally saying the words his heart always felt. When the time was right then the conversation would happen. No matter what he was thankful for her being alive and well.

He looked up when he heard the door opening to the behavioral health center signaling (Y/N)’s last group had ended. Dean’s lips curled into a wide grin as she hugged the few friends she had made before running over to him. She jumped into his opened arms hugging him tightly while he spun her around.

“How was it, pretty girl?” he asked opening the passenger door for her.

(Y/N)’s smile never failed to brighten his day, “It was great and a little sad.”

He quickly got in Baby bringing her to life, “Well you know it’s not goodbye, just see ya later. It’s important for you to have friends outside of hunters.”

She nodded, “Yeah, I know and I will still see Tabby for my weekly sessions. Just a new step to go up but I have a great support system.”

“Yes you do. Now, we go to celebrate with burgers and shakes.” Dean pulled out from the parking lot heading towards their favorite diner in town.

Once they put in their order, he felt the table shaking from (Y/N) bouncing her leg beneath it. Dean reached over placing his hand on top of hers, “Are you okay?”

(Y/N) chuckled, “Yeah. Sorry, there’s just something I want to talk to you about and I’m kind of nervous.”

He smiled softly at her masking the fear tightening around his chest, “Don’t be nervous. I’m here for you no matter what.”

She took a deep breath squeezing his hand, “One of the things I have been working on with Tabby is learning how to express my emotions. I have been burying some emotions for so long that I didn’t know how to tell anyone especially to the person I needed too.”

Dean’s felt his heart beating against his chest as each word flowed from her lips. Keep breathing. Keep calm. Be strong for her. Be here for her.

“See I have feelings for someone and I didn’t feel it was right to tell him until after my program was done.” (Y/N)’s cheeks were turning a beautiful shade of rose and she was biting her lower lip.

He took a deep breath, “S-So you told him your feelings today?”

“Not yet…” Her bright eyes connected with his, “Dean?”

“Yeah?” he squeezed her hand showing he was there for her even though the pain in his chest was agonizing.

“You know I love you.” There was a brief moment of silence between them.

“Yeah, I know.” Smiling for her as his mind screamed from his heart breaking.

(Y/N) shook her head, “No Dean, you read my letter and you know I love you. I understand that you don’t return the feelings since you’ve never brought it up and that’s okay. I want you to know it’s okay that you don’t love me back in that way. I’ve worked through it while in group and I don’t want you to think you have to be on eggshells around me.”

His eyes widened before his body was sliding out of his booth and sitting next to her. Both hands came around her face as his lips pressed against hers. (Y/N) sat still for a moment before she started to kiss him back. Her fingers clenching his jacket pulling him as close to her as possible.

Someone cleared their throat catching their attention as their waitress brought their meals. Dean felt his own cheeks turning the same color as (Y/N)’s as the waitress laughed softly walking away.

“Dean…” He placed a finger on her lips.

“I love you too, (Y/N). I’ve been in love with you for awhile now. I’ve never acted on it because…” now she placed her finger on his lips.

“It doesn’t matter. There is nothing we can do about the past. All we have power over is this moment right now. I say we enjoy our first pancake date and then go back to the Bunker to marathon All Saint’s Day.”

He leaned over kissing her again, “That sounds perfect to me.”

As they were walking towards Baby, hand in hand, he twirled her around wrapping his arms around her waist, “By the way, I’m never going to let you go.”

“I’m thankful for that.” she whispered as he pressed his lips to her temple.

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[wayward-mikaelson]

Centuries--Two

Word Count: 2207

Pairing: Dean X Reader

Characters: Dean, Sam, Cas (Mentioned), Jack (Mentioned), Reader, Michael (Mentioned), Hezekiah (Mentioned)

About: The Reader has some dirty memories from her dream sex with Michael.  The Reader and Dean share a passionate reunion after sharing feelings of being scared that this was dream. The Reader then learns how long she has been back for and gets a name from the time she can’t seem to remember. 

Warnings: Language, Fluff, Angst, Smut, Oral Female Receiving, Fingering, Rough Sex (Protected), Fantasizing, Nipple Play, Drinking, 

A/N: Requests are open until 7.11.2020 until 11.59pm USA Central time. Send your GIFS or pictures with what you want!!

A/N 2: Want to notified first on the next part and or on future fanfics? COMMENT BELOW YOUR FAVORITE DEAN GIF.

Forever Tag List: @hobby27​ @donnaintx​ @myinconnelly1​ @elansaidaris​ @magssteenkamp​ @pinktree84 

Dean/Jensen Tag List: @akshi8278​ @sandlee44​ 

*18+ CONTENT. YOUNGER THAN 18 MOVE ALONG

**DO NOT COPY AND PASTE MY WORK ANYWHERE WITHOUT ASKING ME FIRST AND WITHOUT GIVING ME CREDIT. I WORK WAY TOO HARD ON MY STORIES TO HAVE MY WORK STOLEN.

***ALL WORKS ARE POSTED ON IG, WATTPAD, AND AO3. ALL UNDER THE SAME USERNAME. GO SHOW THEM SOME LOVE

I shower until the water runs ice cold. Reluctantly, I turn the water off and grab hold of a and dry off. Before I wrap up in it, I stare at the mark that was left by Michael over a year ago. You would think that maybe, just maybe that it wouldn't show up when I came back. I hesitate to touch it and when I do, nothing happens. I'm not sure weather to be happy or sad as I think back to that dream. Well, it wasn't a dream according to Cas, It was the real deal.

I think about how Michael had me pushed up on the wall as his lips were pressed to mine. I think of how at the snap of his fingers, I was naked sitting on top of him. I think how he pushed me down on the couch and ripped his pants off and was inside of me in seconds. I close my eyes as I remember the rough thrusts of Michaels hips and the digging of my nails into his back. Almost identical to the way Dean had thrust into me but there had been inhuman force.

I snap out of day dream and wrap up in the towel and walk out of the bathroom. I make my way to my old room. A room that I barely remember. I enter the room to find that it's been left the same way I remember leaving it. I go to the wardrobe and pull out a tshirt and pants and throw them on. This isn't the time to day dream, I need to figure out how the hell I am even alive and how long I've been alive for.

Walking down the hallway, I pass Dean room. I see him sitting on his bed just staring into space. He looks like hell and I know he blames himself for it all. Saying yes to Michael lead to me killing myself. But we needed that win that day and it backfired in true Winchester form. Dean notices me and smiles. I walk in and sit on the bed next to him. I take his hand in mine and hold it tight.

"I haven't had decent sleep in the last few days and I am tired as hell," Dean lifts my hand up and kisses it. "But, I am scared as fuck to fall asleep and wake up and know that all of this could be a dream."

I smile at him knowing that I feel the very same way. "If this were a dream, Dean Winchester," I use my free hand to cup his face. "Nightmare or not, it's the best dream to have." I lean in and softly kiss him. Dean takes his free arm and wraps it around me and lays us down on the bed. I wiggle my way up. Dean gets a confused look on his face. "The door silly," I close the door and come back and straddle. "Don't need to go scarring your baby brother or Cas or Jack do we now?"

Dean is leaning back just staring at me. I slowly take my shirt off and watch as his eyes rake over what bare skin there is. He slowly lifts his hands to my skin and feels every inch of my stomach and back. He unclasps the bra and removes it and looks at my bare breasts. He takes his hands and squeezes them, making my head roll to the sound. I give a small hum and hang my head back when I feel him take one in his mouth. I smile as Dean sucks and licks my nipple making it hard under his grip.

Deans arms are around me the moment I sigh his name. He lays me down on the bed and I can see his dick pressed hard up on his jeans. I need it inside of me. I need to feel him thrusting inside of me again. It's been so fucking long since I've felt it. Instead of taking his pants off, Dean undoes my pants and slowly pulls them off along with my underwear. I am very aware of how wet I am with the air blowing around the room from the ceiling fan. Dean notices and gives a lustful smirk.

"I love to see that I still have this affect on you," He kneels down and kisses my leg from the knee to my thigh. When he gets to my thigh, I am aching so bad for him my legs shake. "Now let's test the waters, shall we?" Deans hand touches my folds and he begins to rub slow but firm. I grab my breasts and give them a squeeze. Then he slips in one finger making me sigh again.

"Oh so wet for me," Deans is soft and rough. He teases a second and third finger as he wiggles the one finger inside me around. It's making me squirm.

"Please," I whisper as my hands squeeze my breast again. "Dean, please."

"Please what?" His firm voice asks.

"Fuck me with your fingers." I gasps as his one finger starts toying around with my g-spot. "Make me cum all over your hand." Fuck, I missed this. I missed the feeling of being wanted. I missed the feel of being had by someone that loves me. I missed this part of being alive. As if reading my mind, Dean inserts two more fingers and begins to push and pull in and out. I sigh and let our a soft moan.

It doesn't take long before I am clawing at the sheets and arching my back. I whimper softly, pleading to cum but, Dean doesn't let me. Instead he teases me by getting me as close as I can and then stopping. I sigh dramatically each time only to hear him chuckle. "You're impossible," I tell him. Then I fell him go down on me and I squeak.

I reach down and hold his face in place as he fucks me with his tongue and sucks on my clit. My hips begin to rise up and down as I feel myself start tightening up. I wrap my legs around Deans neck to keep him place and to press him deeper into me. I grip his hair tight as my soft moans become louder.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I yelp loudly as he inserts two fingers. Now, I am being fucked by both his tongue and fingers. It can't get better than that. My breathing is started to become ragged and I'm practically yelling for Dean to not stop. To keep going. Then I cum.

"Oh my fucking God, Dean," I scream as he continues to thrust his fingers in me and lick up the results of my orgasm. I let my head fall back as I come off my high. I close my eyes when I feel Dean start to kiss up my body and reach my lips. I wrap my arms around his neck and smirk against his lips. "Your turn." I push him over and rip open his pants and pull both pants and under down. His dick springing up to life.

Dean rolls over and I hear him rummaging in a side drawer. He sits up and I see the condom package in his hands. I take it from him and rip it open and slowly roll it over his length. He groans as I do. Feeling myself get wet all over again, I stand up and sit over him and slowly lower myself on his length until he was balls deep inside of me.

I slowly start to move my hips up and down while making eye contact with him. He throws his head on the bed. "Fuck," he groans. His hands grabbing my hips and slamming me down on him. Making me yelp. I have no time to react to what happens next.

Dean pulls me down and wraps his arms around me. He rolls us over to where he's on tops of me. He sits up and pulls my hands from my chest and pins them above me. With a wicked grin and a sexy raised eyebrow, he slowly pulls out and teases the both of us with just the tip. Then he slams himself back in making me moan and scream at the same time.

Dean continues this until he raises my leg up onto his shoulder. Be both make eye contact at the sudden change in angle and position. He start to thrust deep, hard, and fast. Fucking me right into the mattress. We both are mess of moans, groans, screams, grunts, the whole bit. Then a few deep thrusts later, Dean yells out my name and I scream out his.

We lay there on the bed. Dean has his arms around me. "I'm convinced that this is my own personal heaven now," Dean says into my hair. His voice is soft and I know he's about to crash soon. I chuckle and roll over and give him a light kiss on the lips. His eyes are closed but I see him smile a bit before he starts to breath deeply.

I roll out of the bed and realize my legs feel like jello. Dean will be proud to know that he fucked me to the point that my legs were shaking afterwards. I look around the room for my clothes and get dressed. I smooth out my hair and make my way out of the room to the kitchen to make me some food.

"Wow," I hear Sams voice enter the kitchen after me. "I'm surprised you can still walk after all of that. Where's Dean?" I'm surprised too, I think. I am even sore down there too. But, it's a good sore. The one that makes getting fucked hard worth it.

"Sleeping," I say pulling out stuff to make a sandwich. "Do you know where Cas is? I need to look at my side again. I still have the mark Michael gave me for some reason."

Sam nods. "Cas and Jack dipped out when they started to hear you and Dean. Not sure if they will be back tonight. What did Dean say about it?"

"I don't think he saw it," I say putting the finishing touches on my sandwich. "If he saw it then he chose not to say anything." I take a bite and just marvel at the taste of the food. Almost better than the sex I just had. I reach back into the fridge and pull out two bottles of beer. I crack one open and I also marvel at the taste of it. It felt like forever since I had real food and a good beer.

"So," Sam says pulling out the phone I gave him. "I got a hit off the phone. The person you were talking to, their name doesn't exist so it's a total fake but, you kept calling them Hezekiah."

I sudden get this sharp pain in my head when he says that name. I grab my head and close my eyes. I start to see a figure with dreads and dark skin. As fast as the pain came it left. I realize I am sitting on the ground with my head in between my knees. Sam is by me.

"Are you okay?" He asks worried. "You just collapsed out of no where."

I rub my head a bit to make sure the pain is really gone. "I think so," Sam helps me up. "I know that name for some reason." I think back on that name. Its really familiar. Then I remember that moment I'm grabbed in the field trying to get Dean back from Michael. The angel that grabbed me was the same Hezekiah that Michael called out.

"Do you remember the name of that angel that Michael yelled at to get through the gate?" I ask Sam.

"No not really. Why?"

"It's the same damn fucking angel," I take a drink of my beer again. "Anything else?"

Sam slides the phone over to me. "Just that it's hard to track the number you had been texting or calling for the past year. So I hard reset it and made it even harder to track. Oh and new number too."

"What?" I ask staring at Sam and I pick up the phone. I want to make sure I heard him right before freaking out.

"I said it's harder to track now and you have a new number."  Sam says looking back at me before he tries to leave the kitchen.

"No," I say walking around the island. "What you said before that. For how long I'd been in contact with this bitch."

It finally clicks in Sam's head. "You've been back for a year."

That right there. I've been back that long. No memory but a name. A name when it was said, caused my head to hurt like I was being tortured. I hold the phone up and know that some of the answers that I needed were erased but maybe for a good reason. If this phone had been its original state who knew if I was already being tracked here. Cas needs to get back here so that he can try and dig deep into my brain.

[bethhxrmon]

do flowers exist at night? -chapter nine

Chapter Nine: Here Comes The Rain Again

Pairing: Steve Harrington x OC

Chapter Summary: Exactly one month after the events of the Upside Down, Annie is trying to pick up the pieces. Meanwhile, Steve is worried about what will happen after he eventually graduates high school.

Word Count: 3.8k

Warnings: Swearing, trauma recovery, fighting, a plot twist

A/N: Thanks for the encouraging words, hopefully I’ll be able to keep writing. Now all that’s in my way is my college classes taking up my time. Really hope you guys enjoyed this chapter because I’m really excited about it! You can find the other parts here.

~*~*~*~

One month. It had been almost exactly a month since everything had truly been swept out from underneath Annie and any perception she had of reality as she knew it. Something that she thought was accomplished by moving to New York and her parents then divorcing. Things couldn't have possibly gotten more messed up after that. How naive she had been.

Lunchtime was simultaneously the best and worst part of every day. On one end, it meant there was only half a day left and she could hang out with Steve for a while. However, she hated eating and she hated finding her way to the auditorium. It was always a matter of how quickly she could pick the lock and get in. Seeing that Steve was cornered by Billy just a few yards away made her pause.

She could go over and stop it. She should go over and stop it. Except, she couldn't go over and stop it. Not after last time. Wasn't a month ago enough to tell her she couldn't possibly do anything to help? Things would only be worse.

So instead of doing anything, she picked the lock to the auditorium and let herself in, closing and locking the door behind her. Once Steve knocked, she opened it, but she didn't want anyone following her in. That was the whole point of this place. It was the only safe place in the whole school.

It was even safer when she lit up the whole space. Staring into the shadows and seeing the things she thought she would only see in her nightmares became all too common. Shouldn't she have been over this by now?

"I got my last college letter," Steve said as he ate, "Well, community college to be exact."

Annie looked up from her book, "Oh, really?"

"Yeah, I don't know if I'll go there. I've got a few options."

"Oh, um, that's really good!"

Any positive tone just felt too forced for Annie's taste, but Steve never seemed to notice that. It wasn't that she wasn't happy for Steve. He was getting out, that was good. Except, what did that mean for her?

Deep down, Annie knew that was the most selfish thought she could have. Steve wanted to leave, it was so obvious. Everyone wanted to get out, but so few did and she really thought he had a chance. Getting away from everything that happened sounded like a dream come true.

The problem was that she still had another year. It was another year with Billy Hargrove and whoever he ended up befriending once Tommy graduated. Who was she supposed to talk to? Even after being at the school for over a month, she had yet to find any group of people she truly wanted to be around.

Sure, the kids would be freshmen next year, but did she really want to sit around them every day? She had to put on some kind of act for them so they didn't worry about her. Still, it seemed that Steve was better at doing that with them.

She didn't even fully realize what she was crying at as she got to the epilogue of War and Peace. The characters she cared about the most seemed to make it to the end. Yet she didn't even realize what she was doing until the large book was thrown across the stage.

Steve jumped, "Are you okay?"

"Um... yeah, Tolstoy's just a shit writer," she pursed her lips.

He shook his head, "What happened?"

"Sonya... she was my favorite, you know? And you know what happens to her?! Sh-she... she ends up all alone! Every engagement she had fell through an-and she's living with everyone, but everyone hates her! They say nothing's wrong with her but they just hate her so much and-" she choked out a sob and buried her face in her hands.

Steve's eyes widened and he quickly moved next to her and attempted to hug her, but she was quick to move away before he could, "Hey, maybe if you ate something-"

"I-I'm not hungry."

He huffed, "That's bullshit. I've barely seen you eat since I've known you."

"Just because you haven't seen me eat doesn't mean I'm starving myself," she snapped, looking up at him.

"You think I don't notice?" his brows furrowed, "Annie, you put on mascara in my car when I drive you to school. You wouldn't do that if you got up early enough, so I know you're not eating breakfast. I haven't seen you eat lunch in, like, a week and I don't know about dinner, but I'm sure when your mom's not home you try to get away with not eating anything. I'm not an idiot-"

"I never said that and you know it. It's not your job to fucking babysit me. I'm not one of the kids, and it's not like you're gonna be around in a few months anyways so don't even bother acting like you care," she said, getting up to pick up her book and then to leave.

Steve could only sit there as the door closed, and Annie preferred it that way. If she wanted him to follow her, she would have said something different. Maybe there was a part of her that wanted him to follow her. Hell, a part of her wanted him to hold her and tell her that he would visit even if it was a lie. Just something to keep her from feeling like everything was crashing down all over again.

Even in their one shared class, Annie didn't bother looking in his direction. Mainly because it was embarrassing to think that she cracked like that. Though, she was sure he had enough of her by that point. If he noticed all those issues with her, then he probably didn't want anything to do with her.

That idea in mind, she stayed in the girl's bathroom for what had to be another half hour. By then, she was sure that Steve would get the hint she wasn't coming and he would just go on his own way. Never mind the inch of snow on the ground or how she only had her black vans to help her walk through it all. She would get over it. Obviously this would be the norm once Steve left so she may as well try and get used to it.

However, she didn't expect that anyone would still be lingering that long after. Trying to sneak around Billy right in front of the school was impossible.

"Need a ride?" Billy asked, putting an arm around her.

The stench of cigarettes made her want to scream, but she couldn't say anything. It felt like she was just watching it all happen to her. She wanted to push or do something.

All she could think of was to run, so that was what she did. Annie ran so hard that her lungs burned. Except, she didn't get too far because of how slick the sidewalk was and she landed on the ground, smacking her side against the concrete.

Annie tugged her sweatshirt around herself even as she felt the ice cold snow digging through most of the fabric. The sound of a car pulling up was lost on her.

Steve was in front of her and she wasn't sure what part of that shocked her the most. That he stayed the whole time or that he was trying to help her up. At least nothing physical had been broken.

"Are you gonna say anything?" he asked as he drove.

Annie crossed her arms, "I can take care of myself, you know."

"Right, you did such a good job of that when you were eating shit on the ice," he said, "Look, Anne-"

"Don't fucking call me that!"

His grip on the steering wheel tensed, "Can you please not yell right now? I get it, you're really pissed off or whatever, but it's really icy out and I need to focus."

Annie simply stayed silent after that, not even commenting on how the radio was going haywire. When he pulled up to her house, she just got out and went inside without another word. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't bring herself to apologize when she knew she was right about having to get used to not having him around.

The only consolation of the day was that Erik curled up in her lap as she finished the last part of the book she had been working through for the last month. If only she could move on from everything that happened the same way she could close a book and put it back on a shelf.

It was the phone ringing that snapped her from those thoughts, and she rushed to pick it up. Her mom said that Scott was coming over for dinner since Thanksgiving had gone less than smoothly.

"Hi, who's this?"

"Anne, I'm looking for your mom," her dad said.

"She's not home right now. Not that I'd tell her you called."

"You know, if she isn't looking after you right, I can take care of-"

"Fat chance. Like I'd want you taking care of me," she said, clenching the phone in her hands.

He sighed, "I'm just saying, the custody battle isn't entirely over."

"Why would you wanna take care of me when you won't even pay child support?! What's the point in having you just torture me for the next ten months when I'd just be miserable the whole time!" 

A surge of pain went through her hand that made her drop the phone. The phone was completely fried and her hand was a little bit burned. She simply stared for a few moments before going to take care of it in the bathroom.

That was when she saw a bit of blood coming from her nose. It contrasted with her light brown skin and she was quick to wipe it with a piece of toilet paper. She then focused on bandaging up her skin. However, a question of what happened was still in the back of her mind.

Had she done that?

The kids always talked about how Eleven's nose bled when she used her powers. Annie didn't get nosebleeds often. Before right then, the last time she got a nosebleed had been after she woke up with all those things crawling on her.

It was a weird and unrealistic theory, though. Two nosebleeds didn't mean anything. Her paranoia was probably through the roof. The odds of her simply finding parallels that weren't there was more likely than anything else. Besides, why would she have powers now?

There wasn't anything super different about her. Sure, her birthday was just over a month ago and she was seeing the Upside Down, but that had more to deal with being near the lab. At least, that was the feeling she and Steve decided to go with. The lights would flicker on and off every time, though.

As much as she didn't buy it at first, none of that stopped Annie from spending a good amount of time on the lamp in her room. She brought a box of tissues and concentrated as much as she could on the light bulb.

"Okay, this is really stupid, I know it's stupid," she said, glancing over at Erik who simply continued his nap in the middle of her bed.

Still, she continued to stare at the light in front of her. Something had to happen. After all, it was clearly possible to some degree. She didn't know her biological parents, maybe they were like that or they were part of something. It was worth trying and the only one watching her fail was her sleeping cat. Steve wasn't going to sneak up on her. Not after she completely screwed that friendship up.

"Come on, you're making me look like a dumbass," she glared at the light.

It had been a month and she wasn't over anything that happened. The least that experience could have left her with was some form of powers. Maybe that could keep her safe from all those shadows at night. She deserved something after all that she lost. Everyone had someone else. And sure, she had Steve at the time but she knew she messed that up beyond repair. Maybe it was for the best. When had she ever had something go right with a guy?

The light sparked a bright, light blue and she almost screamed from how suddenly it lit up. Annie stared at it with such intensity. The light continued to beam brightly and stayed that same distinctive blue. It was beautiful. Was this really the only thing she could do, though? 

All that trauma and for what? All those nightmares and flashbacks out of nowhere and all she got was the ability to turn on some lights. There was also the chance to traumatically flip-flop dimensions. She couldn't forget blowing up the phone either.

With all of those thoughts swimming in her head, the light shattered. Glass clattered all over her desk.

"Shit."

At dinner that night, Annie sat with her mom and Scott over some soup that was quickly heated up at the last possible second. Still, it tasted just fine and Annie made sure that her mom knew that. Well, after she explained that the phone freaked out on her.

"So, Scott... I was watching Carrie the other night and I was wondering, like... could someone be able to have those types of powers but with electricity in real life?" she asked, some of her hair falling in her face.

Scott took a spoonful of soup as he thought, "Interesting... I believe you're asking about electrokinesis. Everyone has an electric current inside themselves, being able to control that would be a psionic ability that has yet to be proven by science. Though, we're making new discoveries all the time. It's always in the realm of possibility."

"Um... and what do you think they could do?"

"I suppose someone with that power could control everything with an electrical impulse. Lights, electronics... even other people. That would have to take a lot of power, though," he said before shrugging, "No one really knows, but there is always research to be done."

For a moment, Annie couldn't help thinking about Billy and all the other people at school who did something to make her life hell in the last month. If she tried hard enough, she could really do some damage.

Would that be enough, though? She needed to show someone and figure out what to do. The only person who could come to her mind was Steve. This was huge, surely a sudden onset of psionic abilities was enough to completely discard the things she said. If there was anyone she trusted with something so important, it was him.

After dinner, she thought through what she was going to say. Once she had something in mind, she grabbed her jacket and snuck out through her window. It was freezing outside, but she didn't notice as she hurried on her walk.

There was no reason to fear the shadows if she could just zap something away. Sure, she still turned at every slight noise. It was the first time she walked to Steve's this late at night. She didn't take too long to get to his house. The issue at play was figuring out how to get up to Steve's room.

It took a bit of walking around the house, but she did manage to scale the house, knowing where Steve's room was. The room was right above the pool that was covered and most likely drained. She could see the window light was on.

There was never a worry that Steve would be asleep. He was like her in that way, neither of them slept a whole lot. Probably for the exact same reasons, but she never asked.

The only problem with his window was that there wasn't any roofing below it. She mentally prepared herself to jump when she saw a breath in the dark air. With the way the wind blew, the smell of cigarette smoke hit her face and her heart dropped.

She could only cry out when she slipped on the slick roof and started to fall forward. A scream caught in her throat and wouldn't leave, but she felt something grab at her arm.

"Annie?!" Steve whisper-yelled, "What're you doing here?"

She stared up at him, "I- um... a little help?"

"Thought you could help yourself or whatever," he said as he dropped his cigarette out the window and helped her up into his room.

Getting inside Steve's room made it obvious that talking about electrokinesis to start things off wasn't going to cut it. She wasn't blind and could easily see the red rims around his brown eyes.

Annie chewed on her lip, "What's wrong?"

Steve couldn't bring himself to say anything and instead handed Annie a letter from his desk. She took it, reading over its contents. It seemed that Steve got waitlisted at the community college for one reason or another. 

"I don't get it... I mean, sure that sucks, but you just said that you got into a few places. What's wrong?" she asked, setting down the letter.

He laughed bitterly, "Don't you see? I lied about that. This was my last option, and I couldn't even get into fucking community college. Looks like I am gonna be around in a few months."

There was a long pause as Annie processed his words. Everything about her abilities completely went out of her mind. Of course she wanted Steve around for more than a few more months, but that didn't mean she wanted him to be stuck in Hawkins.

"Are you gonna say anything?" he asked, trying to look at her as though that could give him half a clue as to what she was about to say.

She looked up at him, "I'm sorry, like, really sorry. I shouldn't have said the things I did today and I know I shouldn't have freaked out on you. Um... I know what I said was really shitty, and- and I know that because I was trying to push you away."

"An-and I wish I could say that if I knew what was going on with all this college stuff that I wouldn't have said those things, but it really doesn't matter because I said them anyway and I'm so, so sorry. You don't need to go through all this alone," she said, doing everything she could to keep herself from crying.

Steve sighed, "You don't need to apologize, I already don't have a future. You probably want a friend who isn't a screw up and an idiot and-"

"Steve! Don't you dare talk about my best friend like that ever again," she said, her voice cracking as she hugged him, "You're so smart. I mean, come on, you see right through whatever act I've got going on."

He hugged her back, "Right, because tearing apart your brain is a good way to make money.... that's nice but I'm still a failure."

"No, absolutely not," she frowned, "Maybe things don't look great right now, but you know what?"

"Hm?"

"Everyone thought Cats was gonna suck, and it ended up so critically acclaimed and has more great songs than it had any right to have."

Steve blinked, "You're comparing me to Cats? Cats the musical?"

"Um... yep, I am," she gave a hesitant smile when she looked up at him.

He couldn't stop himself from laughing and he looked down at her with a look she could have sworn he never gave her before. One of his hands went to brush some of her hair out of her face. A finger traced her scar and for once, for the first time, she didn't flinch or pull away. Neither of them said anything, but she could have sworn Steve was leaning down and she knew that she was about to tip toe up to his height.

There was a knock at the door and suddenly they were both looking at each other with wide eyes. Steve nodded to his bed and Annie immediately got under the bed. She had been so used to his parents not being there that she forgot they would even be around.

Her heart was pumping through her ears and she shut her eyes tightly. Why couldn't she have had the power to turn invisible? It would make life so much easier. Why did it have to be a month? Why couldn't she be over it?

"Annie?" Steve whispered, looking under his bed and helping her up so she could sit on his bed next to him, "Hey, what's with your hand?"

She gave a small shrug, "The phone broke while I was talking to my dad."

"Oh..." he looked over the bandage, "Why'd you come tonight?"

"Guilt? I don't know, I um- I guess I needed to make sure you didn't hate me or anything."

He shook his head, "I don't hate you. Did you hurt me? Yeah, of course you did, but I couldn't hate you. I know it's been exactly a month, and you've gotta be really stressed."

"You knew?"

"Yeah, I didn't think you'd wanna talk about it," he ran a hand through his hair, "And I never really knew you before everything went to hell, so I don't know what's normal for you, but I don’t think this is it."

She stared down at her lap, hair falling in her face, "It's not normal, I don't think it is, anyway. I mean, like, I'm a girl and I've been stupid and I've done stupid stuff and been talked into doing stupid things with people, you know?"

"Right..." he nodded for her to continue.

Annie sighed, "I've felt like I wanted to sink into the floor before, but Billy and those demodogs and my parents all at once? I-I just wanna disappear or to control something or destroy or just- just something that lets me actually feel."

"Anne-"

She winced, "Stop. I know it's just a dumb nickname, but that's what my dad's always called me and- and he did nothing but make me feel like garbage in a ten page letter. That part’s not important, but I can't for the life of me distinguish the two things."

"Okay, okay, I won't call you that. I promise," he reached over to her hands, "But I can't stress how much I don't want you to disappear on me. So I need you to tell me you didn't mess up your hand on purpose."

She nodded, "I didn't, the phone went haywire. My mom's buying a new one tomorrow."

The pair stayed up talking about everything from a month ago. Including how Annie was going to go to Barb's funeral. No, she didn't know the girl, but Annie knew that could have been her. Maybe the fact that Steve didn't deserve to be at that funeral on his own was also why she planned on going.

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added!): @dungeons-and-demodogs​ @nxncywheeler​ @ilovebucketbarnes​

[diamondcamefromhell]

Timeless love

Jaskier x female!reader part 4

[PART 1]  [PART 2]   [PART 3]

Summary: This is an AU, where Y/N is a young woman, trying to make ends meet with her freelancing writing job. She lives in her small Nottingham studio apartment along with her cat Apollo. Things change when one evening as she is waiting for her taxi, she meets what she thinks is Joey Batey, but the man in front of her is convinced he’s Jaskier, a character from her current favorite show. Y/N now has to figure out what to do.

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 2,124

A/N: first of all, thank u for positive reviews and kind comments on this story so far, again, it is kind of a slow burner, everything is moving slowly but this is what the story really is, as its taking place in our world, where no dragons or strigas exist and the biggest monsters are, well.. humans? ya kno

but anyways, any and all feedback is appreciated <3

I have to cut our loses. We spend a good hour outside, wondering around my apartment building. But we find nothing, not even a smallest hint of what happened to make Jaskier end up here. The bard stays quiet for most of the search, as I can tell he is still very much worried about me.

He only speaks when he sees a car pass by, as it startles him so much he immediately jumps behind me. I explain to him what it is, or try to, and he relaxes a little. Still flinching whenever a car goes by, though.

We rush inside, before Dave decides to visit again, as I lock the door. Apollo comes to greet us, meowing, but I ignore my friend, as anxiety washes over me and I can barely contain it. I know my companion feels it, as he glues himself to me, following my every step as I rush to the kitchen.

I see Jaskier sit at the couch again, not saying anything. I want to break the silence, but know my voice would shake, and I didn’t want to worry him even more. I throw some toast in the toaster, I will offer him a meal as an apology. I put butter and cinnamon on toast, bringing it to him. I set the plate on the coffee table, sitting down.

“I’m sorry.” I apologize, as the man looks at me. I can’t put my finger on it, but his expression makes me feel weird.

“Don’t be, I over-stepped.” I shake my head, pressing my lips together. I am willing to swallow a bit of my pride for this man.

“No Jaskier. I just… I made a promise. To the stars.” I close my eyes, scared of him judging me. This way, at least I don’t have to see it. “That I would make it on my own. Whatever that it may be. I don’t like it when people help me or try to be nice to me. Makes me feel… weak.”

“But everyone needs help from time to time.” There is no judgement in his voice, so I open my eyes. He gives me a kind smile, as Apollo jumps in my lap, purring. “You are helping me, does it mean I am weak?”

“No.” I say, biting the inside of my mouth, trying to stop the water works from leaking.

“Then why are you weak, if I help you a little?” I can’t answer that, so I just look down, at my cat, who is now napping, soundly. He has a point. “You’re being unfair on yourself. Allow me to say this, Y/N, even my great friend Geralt needs help sometimes. And he’s the bloody Witcher. It does not make him any weaker, if anything, it shows strength.”

“I know.” My voice shakes a little, as I wipe my nose. My eyes may be dry, but nose was runny. “It’s just, I prefer to be alone.”

“I used to say that.” His mind drifts far away. I cant help but admire how beautiful he manages to look. “But I hated nothing more than being alone.”

“I have Apollo.” I argue. He sighs, looking at me.

“Y/N.” He speaks to me like I am a child. We lock eyes, and I see so much care in his gaze, I want to run away. But I stay. “You need people.”

“Either way.” I say, ignoring him. I am barely holding back the tears. “Eat your meal. I have something to show you.”

I spring to my feet. Showing him moving pictures may be a good enough distraction for now. Introducing him to some of the great Internet, so we can avoid the sensitive topics. I look down to see my hands still shaking, so I rush to the bathroom.

There I see Jaskier clothes in a pile on the floor. I sigh, folding them, as tears escape my eyes. I turn on the faucet, making sure the bard can’t hear my heavy breaths and sniffling. It takes me a couple of minutes of crying to clam down. I wash my face, avoiding looking in the mirror. I stop the faucet and flush the toilet, purely because I am scared to go out just yet.

When I do, however, he doesn’t look at me, and I feel relieved. I rush to the bed, grabbing my laptop, soon landing next to him. Our legs touch and I feel the build up static shock me, so I jump back. He giggles, but I ignore that, opening up the computer, entering my password in a quick move.

One glance at him, and I see how mesmerized he is, my heart feels like it will burst. I take a couple deep breaths, wondering what I could show him.

YouTube and Netflix both were dangerous, as they could have his show on the main page, I still bite the bullet, turning the screen from his eyes, going to youtube. As expected, my feed is filled with recommended videos from Joey Batey. I stare at Jaskier for a moment, wondering if somehow he could be Joey, just very confused and lost one. But then I remember the Instagram story, and know I’m grasping at straws.

I search for cat videos, not sure what else to show him. What would interest a man who thinks he is from a fantasy world?

“Look.” I say, pressing play. It seems like his eyes are about to fall out as he stares at the screen, I giggle landing my hand on his. “Relax.”

“What is this magic?” I pause the video, pulling my hand away. Our eyes meet.

“This, Jask, is video. Moving pictures, if you will.” He still seems confused. “We have these things called cameras, that can take not-moving images of a moment, so you can cherish it, or can take moving things, like this cat video. There is even more, people create characters and stories and film them.”

“Do you have a camera?” I nod, putting laptop on the table, as I rush to get my Canon. I come back, turning it on. I decide to use the view finder. I sit next to him. “Here.”

“How do I use it?” He asks, twisting it around, before he begins staring at the screen.

I explain. Then he takes some pictures, of my room, me, my laptop and Apollo. I take some of him, and we even try to take some together, as we both laugh, trying to fit in that small space.

Then I show him some films. I start with my personal favourite and a classic – Titanic. Stopping whenever he get’s to confused, explaining things. We move to more and more films, only taking a break when we both get hungry.

I take the chance and sacrifice my wallet and order us some pizza, which he seems to like. He tries his first fizzy drink, Sprite, and at first he hates it, but I see him sip it more and more as the day progresses.

It keeps up for a couple of weeks. We spend days watching movies as he slowly learns more about the way my world works. We spend some of my savings as I order different take out, but eventually he helps me cook some dinner for us. He slowly, but surely adapts.

Until it all crashes down.

I go to use the bathroom, leaving Jaskier at the laptop. When I come out, however, he is on his feet, anxiously walking around. I stop, my heart dropping to my feet. I see Joey’s face on the screen. No, not his.

I see Jaskier. A video of him, in the tavern, signing.  

He probably went to YouTube And found a video of himself. And a whole lot of questions.

My gaze goes from the screen, to the man, who has stopped pacing, and now is staring at me. His eyes burn, as I see betrayal written all over it. I don’t know what he even thinks is going on and I don’t know how I can explain it to him.

“Jaskier, please.” I point to the couch, but he just shakes his head. I put my hands behind my back, so he wouldn’t see them shake.

“What does that mean?” He asks, as his voice breaks. I feel my heart shatter.

“Please, sit down.” I try to plea, my voice slightly shaky.

“Just tell me what it means!” I flinch at his yell, fighting back the tears. No matter how much it hurts me, I know that he was hurting so much more.

“I don’t know.” I say, and that is the honest truth. His shoulders hang low. “Jaskier, I don’t know.”

“I’m a character.” His voice fills with disgust, as a sudden rush of bravery washes over me. I step to him, grabbing his shoulders.

“You’re so much more than that. You’re here.” I plead again, forcing him to look at me. “You’re you.”

“I’m not even real.” He hisses, escaping my grip. I wrap my hands around myself, as I continue staring at him, as he walks around. Looking for something, anything probably. Wanting things to make sense.

“Then am I crazy and just imagining you? Dave saw you too, Jaskier.” I raise my voice, which makes him stop pacing. Our eyes meet. “You are as real as me. This world just isn’t yours. How that happened, I don’t know, and we will get you home.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” There is so much hurt in his voice that I want to hide under my bed. Run away. Escape. But I choose to stay, for him.

“There is no easy way to say something like this. I don’t even know what this is!” My voice cracks, and that makes Jaskier’s expression soften a little. The storm is passing. “Yes, I recognized you as Joey because he plays you. But you are more than Jaskier we can see on tv. You’re more.”

“Y/N.” Tears escape and that completely washes any and all anger the bard might have had. He comes to me, pulling me towards himself, until we are in an embrace.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you.” I sheepishly say, as he rubs my back. “Hiding it wasn’t right. But explaining this… it’s just unexplainable.”

“I can’t expect you to have all the answers.” I shake my head, as he hugs me tighter. I hear him sigh. “I’m sorry. I scared you. You were trying to protect me.”

“You had a right to be mad.” I say, as tears finally seem to stop. I wipe my eyes and nose to my sleeve, but Jaskier doesn’t let me go just yet.

“You’ve been nothing, but kind to me. You gave me a home.” He lands a kiss on my forehead, as my heart melts. “I should be thanking you.”

He now lets me go. I wrap my hands around me, as I watch him go to the laptop, give it one final look, as he closes it. My heart breaks and I know he probably will look at it more. When I leave him alone, or at night. He will hurt himself more but he will never show me.

Because he knows it would hurt me too.

“When you said who you were, Jask, I didn’t believe it. I’ve seen the show. That’s how I knew about Geralt and Yen.” I confess, as he looks at me. His face expressionless. “That’s also why it was so easy to take you home. It felt like I knew you. Because if you were who you said you are… I’ve seen you. You were already part of my world.”

“You liked me?” He asks, crossing his arms. I can’t help but smile.

“I did. You were truly my favourite.” That makes him smirk, but his eyes remain sad. “Getting to know you, only furthers that.”

“I want to watch the show.” He says, and I knew he would. I bite inside of my mouth, as I think about it.

“I can’t stop you from watching your own story, Jask.” I say, hugging myself tighter. “I cant try and protect you anymore.”

“Watch it with me.” Our eyes lock as my heart skips a beat. He seems so sad and scared.

“Of course.” I say, swallowing back more tears.

So we watch it. We watch his story unfold. I avoid looking at him during these eight hours, scared of what he may look like. After the finale, I pause the show before another one starts. There is silence between us as I finally look at him.

He has tears in his eyes, and for a second time today, I feel my heart shatter.

[PART FIVE]

~~~~~~~~~~

TAG LIST [if you want to be added or removed from this list, let me know <3]

@ultracolorfulnerdcollection ; @viyamystic ; @sleepyblossom ; @killjoy-acid-crash ; @halszka-potter <33

[deadrcbins]

Oneshot Requests! (Bonus: Jeffmads headcanons!)

Yeah, I’m pretty imitable and unoriginal. Sorry, Aaron. Anyway, like a majority of the fandom, I’m making Hamilton one shots! I take requests, I’m great with any angst, no smut, and I’m great with fluff, as well! 

(The cover is John Laurens approved, even though he preferred birds to turtles, the background looked nice.)

SO, onto ships!

I do:

~Jeffmads, since that’s my OTP

~Lams, since it’s also OTP

~Mullette, because it’s OTP in the fandom and in my heart

And literally ANY other ship in the fandom. ANY. If I name them all, I can go on for days!

The exceptions are incest between the Schuylers, and Washette/Whamilton unless there’s no age gap. 

Anyway, thank you so much for reading!

PLEASE NOTE THAT I’LL DO HEADCANONS BEFORE I DO MY ONESHOTS! THANKS!

~

Jeffmads Headcanons:

Let’s start with Madison:

How do they react to a breakup?

James will usually cry a lot and shut himself inside the house for a bit until Thomas comes over and forces him into a Disney movie marathon, complete with ice cream, pillow forts, and a lot of blankets. Of course, this was before Thomas and James professed their undying love for each other. He also becomes very moody and becomes the ULTIMATE emo kid, often dressed in dark and everything. He’ll also contemplate what he did wrong in the relationship and wallow in his self-pity for a bit. This span stretches out for two weeks before he’s back to normal, and so far, he’s only had two breakup episodes.

What would they do if they caught their soulmate cheating?

James’ entire world would crash down. Everything falls out of orbit, and it’d be exactly his worst fear. Thomas is a real good-looking guy...why would he even want to be with James when there are so many other people much more impressive than James? He’d definitely fall into depression. It’d be horrifying for him. Life’s colorful palette would surely turn monotonous. 

Would they leave in the middle of an argument?

No, never. Thomas and James have an envious relationship with each other, and it never becomes that extreme. They’ll talk it out and compromise when it gets to this point. This is quite seldom, though, and over odd issues. 

“Tommy! You’ve burned my favorite pan! Now my omelette won’t taste as good!”

“Buy a new one, then, Jemmy! That YouTube video was so hard to follow!”

Would they make up after a huge argument?

Most definitely. They’re a power couple, a force to be reckoned with!

If James would break up with Thomas, for what reason would it be?

Thomas is too easily jealous of anyone even looking at James the wrong way. He’s a bit clingy, as well. Also, Thomas ends up in a lot of fights with Hamilton, and James gets worried for Thomas’ safety. Gremlin though he may be, he also went to summer military academy, so Hamilton is stronger than he lets on. Thomas has height and build, but can’t channel much of it.

Moving on their S/O?

Jemmy would be horribly depressed, but life has a way of moving on whether you wish to or not. He’ll most likely never find passionate love again, and Thomas remains etched into his memory for life.

Emotions while arguing?

Mostly irritation and annoyance, and afterward, regret and sadness.

How do they and their S/O deal with loss?

It was Thomas who experienced loss, between losing his father at fourteen, and Martha Wayles, his high school sweetheart. James comforted him both times. Madison lost his grandmother to cancer a few years back, and he immediately fell into a grievance for months. His grandmother was his only confidant after Thomas left for Paris, and it disheartened him greatly. He’d never felt so alone in the world, and on top of that, while Thomas was gone, James’ parents pressured him in the first place to go to that highly competitive boarding school for the gifted and talented. He developed his anxiety and anxious introvertedness (Is that a word?) that would plague him for quite a while after. He fears not being good enough, and he constantly feels incompetent and unimportant, despite Thomas’ protests. He kept a secret from Thomas. He tried to take his own life. He stopped hurting himself after Thomas and James got together. 

Biggest regret? 

James’ biggest regret was not being able to maintain the best relationship with his grandmother, who was the one pillar in his life, as he lived with her for two years while James’ parents sent him off to school two hours from there, in the same town Gramma lived. 

Thomas’ Headcanons:

How do they react to a breakup?

Thomas has only been in two relationships before James. Before he met Martha, there was this girl named Sally who dumped Thomas for someone named William Clark. He was depressed, quiet, reserved, and sad for a week with Sally gone, and he was horribly self conscious about his tics, he was fidgety, too. It was horribly out of character, and even Hamilton bought Jefferson a cupcake. He compared himself to everyone else for ages after that. Luckily James was great at comforting, and he was so kind to Thomas afterwards. James made Thomas Mac ‘N’ Cheese and they both pranked Hamilton secretly just for fun, He bottles his emotions until the last day of his phase, then cracks. The next day, he’s back to normal.

Would they ever leave in the middle of an argument?

Again, no, never. Thomas might get stressed out trying to compete with Hamilton at work and work itself, and/or might have had a bad day occasionally, so he’ll be extra moody those days. James knows that he’s anxious about something, so he tries to give Thomas space those days, often reading or watching TV or doing something quietly until he cools off.

Would they make up after an argument?

Most definitely. Thomas is a little puppy. He’ll always come back, loyal and a tad clingy. They enjoy talking out their issues and compromise. 

If Thomas were to break up with James, for what reason would it be?

Thomas loves James and you cannot convince anyone otherwise. Cons

Moving on from their S/O?

Thomas actually had to do this with Martha. In the beginning, it was difficult, and he fell down a vortex of emotions, feelings he wasn’t used to feeling, and like with Sally, Hamilton tried his hardest to console Thomas so that they could fight again. Thomas hates being alone, and losing James as well...it’s unimaginable.

Emotions while arguing:

First, it’s annoyance and irritation, then guilt and sadness. 

How do they and their S/O deal with loss?

It was Thomas who experienced loss, between losing his father at fourteen, and Martha Wayles, his high school sweetheart. James comforted him both times. He likes to keep it private, you won’t even know he cried. Mostly his way of accepting is helping and comforting other people, and shuts his emotions and mourns privately.

What is their biggest regret?

Not getting to say goodbye to his father and Martha, who both died in car crashes. Martha died, she was going with her friend Merida, who survived, on their way to A La Mode, and Peter, Randolph, and Thomas were involved in a car crash the year before, after coming back from a guys’ day out fishing trip. He feels he distracted the drivers both times and deaths were his fault, though it wasn’t. Thomas rode shotgun, giving him his cane, and Randolph had his spleen removed. Elizabeth, their sister who had autism and brain trouble, went crazy after hearing of the crash and refused to sit in a car. They give her Benadryl or sleep medicine. now for necessary trips. A secret Thomas kept from James was that he failed a suicide attempt, but doesn’t self-harm anymore after James and himself got together. Little did he know, while he was in France...James, ever depressed, tried the same thing.    

[gamerwoo]

Yixing: Side Job (Part 2)

Characters: Yixing x female reader (featuring Jongin, Sehun, and Junmyeon)

Genre/warnings: camboy au, barista au, crack, kinda fluffy, mentions of masturbation

Word count: 3,453

Summary: Your go-to to get off is your favorite camboy who goes by the name of Lay. Physically, he’s perfect, and everything he says leaves you breathless and wanting him to keep talking until you’re coming undone in front of your laptop. However, you notice that the new barista hired at the cafe down the street has a voice that sounds familiar…

Part 1 | Part 3

Coming home that day, you went straight to your room and flopped down on it face first. Your friend kept asking if you were feeling alright because you weren’t paying any attention at all the whole day. All you could think about was how Lay, your favorite camboy, was a barista just down the fucking street! And then that lead to the fact that he must’ve lived nearby, which was somehow even more terrifying.

There were three things you knew for sure: first, you weren’t sure you could ever watch another one of Lay’s streams; second, you were never stepping foot in that cafe ever again; third, Lay’s face was just as drop-dead gorgeous as his body.

No, not Lay. His name was Yixing. And you couldn’t get that out of your head for some reason. You knew Lay was probably some sort of alias, but you never expected you’d know his real name. It felt too...personal. You weren’t sure how you felt about it.

You spent the next few days trying to keep yourself as distracted as possible. You didn’t want to go watch any of his streams -- no matter how mentally and emotionally exhausted you felt -- and you didn’t want to build up the curiosity to go back to the cafe and see if he was there because some masochistic part of you wanted to go back and take in the fact that Lay was a real person that was right in front of you. But you wouldn’t let yourself do that.

It wasn’t until those few days had gone by that your promise to never return to the cafe was broken.

Jonginie: come keep me company :(

you: do you not realize what time it is???

Jonginie: but studying sucks and i need friends

you: sehun exists???

you: taemin exists????

you: jimin exists??????

Jonginie: sehun's getting laid, jimin’s at a concert, and the last time i invited taemin out late at night he got lost and i spent two hours trying to find him because he wouldn’t answer his phone

you: oh my god you big baby

you: where are you?

Jonginie: that little cafe down the street from your apartment :)

you: NO

you: NOPE

you: IM NOT GOING

Jonginie: ????

Jonginie: what the actual fuck is wrong with you

You couldn’t tell your best friend the reason you couldn’t go back to that cafe. You couldn’t admit that you watched a camboy and that camboy just happened to work there. You couldn’t tell him that the day before you ran into him, you donated $20 and called him Daddy as you begged for him to whip his dick out. You just couldn’t admit any of that.

So what excuse did you have to work with?

Jonginie: i’ll buy you your favorite!!! :)

None. You had no excuses at all.

you: i’ll be there in 10 ig

So you got dressed and put on your proverbial big girl pants before you grabbed your keys, slipped on your shoes, and left the house with your phone in your pocket just in case. Only Jongin would ask you to meet him at a coffee shop at 8pm so he could study and not be alone, so you, being a female, had to keep your phone with you at all times and have your keys in hand just in case -- and not just to unlock your door when you got home.

Thankfully, the walk to the cafe was uneventful, but you couldn’t get your brain to calm down the whole way there. You were just worrying about if Lay -- Yixing -- would be there. You didn’t even know what you were so worried about the longer you thought about it. It wasn’t like you had to talk to him. Just say hello, order, and then say thanks and have a good day. It was so simple but your stupid imagination was acting like he would somehow know you masturbated to him on a weekly basis. 

Taking a final deep breath, you opened the door to the cafe and walked in -- you also made note to check their hours and you were surprised to find the cafe had such late hours, but it was probably because there was a college campus nearby. You glanced at the counter, offering an awkward smile to the bored-looking girl working. She seemed to be the only one working, in fact, since the cafe was empty except for Jongin and some other poor college student that was typing away furiously on their laptop. 

“Hey!” Jongin grinned as you sat down across from him. The table was covered with papers, his textbook, and his notebook that he was scribbling in. “You should’ve told me when you were closer by so I could’ve ordered for you.”

“It’s fine, I can order for myself,” you shrugged.

“Alright, here’s my card,” he said as he pulled out his wallet and handed his card over to you. “I’m gonna use the bathroom really quick.”

As you both got up, you stopped at the counter while Jongin went passed it to where the restrooms were located. You greeted the poor barista before ordering what you wanted and paying for it. But as you waited for her to make your drink, you started to get curious. You figured you had nothing to lose if you were never coming back here -- starting tonight -- so you softly spoke up.

“Excuse me? Um...w-when does Yixing usually work?”

The girl looked up at the sound of your voice, “Yixing? Uh, usually mornings, I think.”

You nodded with a quiet “thanks”, happy she didn’t ask why you wanted to know. She finished making your drink and handed it to you with a “enjoy” that wasn’t nearly as chipper as the one Yixing gave you, but that was neither here nor there.

As you went back to your table, you smirked to yourself. Maybe you could find away around avoiding the cafe, especially since this seemed to be where Jongin liked to study now. If you just came here at night, you’d be safe. It made sense anyway -- nighttime was when Lay liked to stream. If you just didn’t come in the mornings, you were safe. You could easily get your coffee and not run into the boy that didn’t know you’d seen him naked way more times than you could count on one hand.

“What’re you smirking about?” Jongin scoffed as he walked back over to the table.

You cleared your throat, scrunching your face before letting it fall back to its neutral state, “Nothing. Do your homework.”

-

The cafe was back to being a safe space now that you knew Yixing’s -- Lay’s; you never knew what to call him, honestly -- schedule. You showed up quite a bit to keep Jongin company while he studied. Sometimes his other friends would join which was always...interesting to say the least -- especially with Taemin. Sometimes it was just you and Jongin with him complaining about how he hated homework and wondering why he went to college. 

After a couple weeks, you had calmed down enough to be able to go back to watching Lay’s streams. You figured there was no harm if you didn’t really know him and would never see him again, so...why not? Plus, you hadn’t gotten a really good orgasm ever since you stopped watching him and you really couldn’t take it anymore. You had to give in because you were weak.

A month had gone by and you were finally over your fear of seeing Lay at the cafe.

While you were packing your things up to go home from work, your phone vibrated. You took it out to check, seeing Jongin was texting you.

Jonginie: can i stay at your place tonight?

Jonginie: i miss you :(

you: okay whats the real reason

Jonginie: .......my roommate’s drunk and obnoxious and i probably won’t sleep tonight

Jonginie: BUT I SWEAR I ALSO MISS YOU

Jonginie: please?? :(((((

If you were going to host Jongin tonight, you’d need something to keep you awake after you got home. Typically you were able to crash then and there and it would only be about 6:30. So after agreeing to let Jongin stay over, you grabbed your things and left work, deciding your next destination was the cafe.

When you entered, nobody was at the counter. There were only a few customers inside, already having gotten their coffees. Some were on their phones as they sat at tables, and some were working on their laptops. You didn’t really pay much attention to them -- or anybody -- as you walked up to the counter to order a coffee, looking down at your phone instead.

“Hi! How can I help you?” that friendly voice chirped, shooting ice through your veins as you all but froze on the spot.

Slowly, you looked up, almost whimpering when your eyes moved over the nametag that read Yixing. Your eyes met his as he smiled at you, showing off his dimples as he waited for your reply.

Internally, you were panicking. He wasn’t supposed to work nights! Why was he working? Why was he here? Why now? Why, why, why?

But externally, you shyly gave him your order before you paid for it.

Yixing turned to make your order as you went to wait by the pick-up counter. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him even though you wanted so badly to look away and erase all of this from your mind. But your eyes followed him as he moved around, thinking about how good he looked even in his barista uniform. Maybe he’d do a barista theme for one of his cams...

‘Jesus, _____, stop it. That’s weird, don’t go there.’

You shook the thought from your mind, taking a deep breath to try to clear your thoughts. That was when Yixing walked over with your order, sliding it across the counter to you with his dumb beautiful smile that made your legs turn to jelly.

“Have a good day, _____,” he grinned, remembering your name from when you gave him the order.

And that’s when you said the worst thing you could’ve said to him other than admitting you watched his cams. Your stupid brain wasn’t thinking, and you blurted the only thing you could get away with in public, but would still probably not only send Yixing into a panic, but would make him think you were weird.

“Thanks, Lay.”

You were half-turned to leave when you realized, and you froze. Lay -- Yixing, Jesus; it’s Yixing -- froze as well, the smile dropping from his face as he just stared at you with an unreadable expression. His eyes were slightly widened, and his mouth was a little ajar, but you couldn’t tell what kind of emotion it was conveying. 

“Wh--” Yixing’s eyebrows furrowed the tiniest bit as he looked away at the counter before looking back at you again. “What did you just call me?”

You didn’t want to answer and drag this awkward conversation on even longer, but your legs also wouldn’t respond when you decided it was best to just walk away and not answer or look back. Your feet were practically glued to the floor, staring back at Yixing in silence as you looked like a deer in headlights.

“_____!” a familiar voice called.

Your head whipped around to see Jongin smiling at you as he waved, walking into the cafe. You almost wanted to cry from relief when you saw him.

“I was on my way to your place when I saw you were in here,” he chuckled, grabbing your arm. “C’mon, I told Sehunie he could come over to watch movies for a bit and he’s gonna beat us there. If he’s waiting for longer than 2 seconds, he’s going to complain all night and I don’t wanna hear it.”

Jongin dragged you away from the counter, forcing your legs and feet to finally move. However, your dumb, idiot self decided to look back over your shoulder to find Yixing still staring at you, watching as you disappeared out the door with Jongin -- who you now decided you’d owed your life to.

-

“You got here the same time as us, stop whining!” Jongin groaned as he pushed open the door to your apartment after he unlocked it.

Sehun followed in behind him, stating that the host should already be at the house before the guests get there, and that even arriving at the same time is impolite and “fucking dumb”. Jongin was quick to point out that it wasn’t a house, it was an apartment, so Sehun could take his whining and shove it up his ass. 

You walked in behind Sehun, still in a dazed state after what happened. Neither of them questioned your behavior since Jongin was chattering away the whole walk to the apartment, and then him and Sehun were bickering in the elevator. But in your head, all you were doing was replaying the incident with Yixing. How the hell did you actually call him Lay? How did you slip up like that? Just “thanks” would’ve been fine but no, you had to tack a name on the end of there.

Thankfully, the two boys were still oblivious to your spacey state even as the three of you sat down to watch a movie together. Sehun was on his phone for parts of it, but him and Jongin were still going back and forth throughout the movie. Both of them were critiquing the acting, the special effect -- basically anything that they could during the movie so you weren’t sure why they wanted to watch it. The only thing that interrupted them was Sehun’s phone dinging before he stood up and went to the door.

“A couple of friends wanted to stop by -- apparently it’s important so I said sure,” Sehun said over his shoulder as he went to go put his shoes on to go downstairs and let them in. “Hope you don’t mind, _____.”

You only half heard what he said, mumbling it was okay. But Jongin began lecturing the younger boy about how he shouldn’t have complained about manners and being polite when he just openly invited strangers to your apartment. But Sehun ignored him as he left, closing the door behind him.

You stayed spacing out on the couch, still replaying that awful embarrassing moment in your head. Sehun opening the door didn’t snap you out of it, and neither did his voice mingling with his friend’s. It wasn’t until you heard a third voice that your eyes went wide and your body went rigid. It was just a laugh, but it was one you recognized -- one that would probably haunt you in your dreams.

“Hey,” the way Sehun said the greeting made you and Jongin realize he wanted your attention, so you cautiously turned your head to see Sehun standing with a two shorter men -- one of which was already looking at you with those beautiful eyes that shot fear into your soul as of late, “this is Junmyeon-hyung, and this is Yixing-hyung.”

“I think I’ve met Junmyeon once before,” Jongin smiled. “Nice to see you again.”

“Hi,” you mumbled before you shot up from the couch and decided the kitchen seemed like a way better room to be in right now. “I’m gonna grab a drink.”

You scurried out of the room, hoping to go unnoticed. You hoped that even though Yixing was staring right at you that maybe somehow he didn’t recognize you as the person that called him by his camboy alias. You knew that was impossible, but you still hoped, anyway.

Entering the kitchen, you went to the fridge, hoping to just get a bottle of cold water to calm your nerves. But when you had the door halfway open, it was pushed shut. You stared at the ring-clad hand that was holding it shut, afraid to let your eyes follow the arm of it up to the owner, but you did so slowly anyway.

Yixing stood there with a raised eyebrow, but you couldn’t tell exactly what he was thinking or what he was feeling. He was showing virtually no emotion other than the quirked brow. He didn’t even say anything, and you were shrinking back away from his gaze, feeling like there was a weight pushing in on you.

When Yixing didn’t speak up, you said the only thing you could think of.

“W-why are you in my apartment...?”

To your surprise, he let out an amused chuckle, his eyes glancing away for a moment as he shook his head, “Sehun’s an acquaintance of mine. I thought that was pretty obvious when he introduced me. Of course, he did introduce me as Yixing and not Lay, so I could see why maybe it would be confusing to you.”

The smirk he gave you was teasing, and your cheeks immediately burned red as your gaze met the floor. You didn’t even know how to reply. Should you apologize? ...That was really the only option your brain could come up with.

“You watch me?” he asked, his voice soft but with a tinge of amusement.

You opened your mouth to reply, but nothing came out. Obviously you did watch him but you couldn’t bring yourself to verbally admit to it. How could you even admit to that? And right to his face in your kitchen while his and your friends were in the living room.

“You don’t have to panic,” he laughed softly, letting himself lean against your fridge door so his shoulder was resting against it with his arms crossed. “I mean, I’m the one who gets off on stream for everybody to see. I’m already aware that people watch me.”

“Still...” you mumbled, still unable to meet his eyes.

“You’re cute,” he giggled.

That made you look up, your eyes wide. Why did he say that? Literally what part of this made you seem cute to him? Or maybe he was just sadistic and found your embarrassment to be cute. Maybe he was into that. ...Then again, you recalled a stream where-- 

‘Not the time, _____.’

“You wanna know something?” he asked. “I came here on purpose.”

“What?” you blurted, looking absolutely horrified.

Now you were being bullied by a camboy. This was a new low in your life.

He let out a laugh that sounded so genuine, you didn’t think you’d ever heard it in any of his streams. He just looked so happy that you wanted to look at him laugh and hear him laugh forever.

“I swear it wasn’t just to torture you more,” he insisted before he explained, “but you called me Lay and I’d never had that happen before. I vaguely recognized your friend, and he said you were friends with Sehun -- when he was talking about the complaining, I realized it was the same Sehun. Him and my friend, Junmyeon are friends, so I texted Junmyeon and asked if he could do me a favor.”

“A...a favor...?”

“Alright, so maybe it was a little bit to tease you,” he giggled with a shrug. “I just-- You should’ve seen your face when the name slipped out! I don’t know, I guess I felt...intrigued. Why were you so scared anyway?”

“You wouldn’t be horrified if you had to admit to somebody you watched them get off on the internet?” you asked.

“Nah, seems like it would be more their problem than mine.”

“It’s still not at the top of my list of conversations I’d like to have.”

“What would be at the top?” he asked with a playful smirk.

“Not this...” you muttered.

“Yixing?” the other boy poked his head into the room before his face spread into a smile. He looked amused about something but you didn’t know what or why. “C’mon, let’s go.”

“Coming,” he nodded as the other boy left. He turned back to you, flashing a dimpled smile. “Come by the cafe tomorrow morning if you can. I’ll make you a drink -- my treat. Bye, _____.”

With a wave, he walked out of your kitchen. You didn’t realize you were holding your breath after his goodbye until you heard the door close and let out a sigh of relief.

Sehun and Jongin entered the kitchen, both looking around curiously.

“You and Yixing-hyung were in here for a while,” Sehun noted.

“Yeah,” Jongin looked at you with a crease between his eyebrows, giving you a questioning look, “did you two know each other?”

You shrugged, mumbling, “Kinda...”

[gwaciechang]

Love Run (4/10?)

“Welcome to my table, bring your hunger”

Yes, I know that line’s from The Horror and the Wild. Deal with it.

Once again, trigger warnings for Bobby Hayes’ life and everything involved in it. This chapter also involves a character with OCD whose rituals lead to an argument with the POV character, the discovery that an addict is keeping drugs in a recovering addict’s living space (a brief line that will be discussed later), and a heavy discussion of the POV character’s past drug abuse and recovery. Read at your own risk below the cut.

“Home sweet home,” you breathe a sigh of relief. Behind you, Bobby is tense and unhappy. That doesn’t change when he steps inside. You wince when you notice the mess. God, why didn’t you clean up before?

Well, missing the bus, making a friend, and killing a hitman might have had something to do with it. You shake yourself out of the memory before it can overwhelm you. You're literally too tired to have a panic attack, how sad is that?

You start scrubbing the dishes you left from breakfast that last morning into the sink. The handle falls off the mug, and you curse. That had been your favorite, too, because it’s the only one your ex didn’t give you when you two moved into this place. The only glue you have in the house is a children’s gluestick that couldn’t hold two pieces of paper together, assuming you could even find it. You resign yourself to a trip to the store. Bobby would probably insist on his own set of dishes anyway, and you do’'t blame him, you're the one who let this place become a sty, after all.

“D-do you mind if I help?” Bobby asks shyly.

“No, of course not. Just, um, just let me know where you put things later, and, uh, try to keep similar things in the same place. That’s dish soap in the handsoap dispenser next to the faucet, by the way. I have a gallon jug of dish soap under the sink next to the trashcan that I refill it with, it’s just easier.” When you realize you’re babbling, you shut your mouth with a click.

“That's smart,” Bobby’s smile is pained. “That’s normal person smart.”

“Normal?” you hold up your hands, which are still covered by his gloves.

Oddly enough, this actually makes him smile, and he gets to washing the dishes with his bare hands, even though it means having to touch four-day-old egg, or whatever that yellow crusty thing is. You go to your bedroom and try to organize your clothes, or at least get them off the floor. And that’s when you realize.

“Shit!”

“What is it?”

You poke your head out to say, “I don’t have a couch, and there’s only one bed.”

His face is grim and he fidgets when he says, “If you don’t mind, I could take a spare blanket and sleep on the floor.”

”I can’t let you sleep on the floor, Bobby, shit.” You take out your thickest blanket anyway, and go to the gaming room your ex set up to dump on the reclining chair. “I’ve fallen asleep here before,” you lie, you’d never used this room before. Bobby’s not paying attention, he’s too busy staring at your ex’s computer.

Right, he’s a fucking computer expert, and your ex, for all his uselessness, was very much into getting the latest technology for League of Warcraft or whatever it was he played.

“Yes, it is most likely whatever model of computer you’re thinking of. I don’t know exactly, since I’ve never used it,” you roll eyes and busy yourself with trying to figure out how to get the reclining chair to actually recline.

“I thought you said you’ve fallen asleep here before.”

Ah shit, you need to be more careful. “Um, yeah,” you hide your face carefully. “When my ex would fall asleep here, I’d usually come join him.” That actually isn’t a lie. “I hate sleeping by myself in that big bed.”

Bobby makes a sound, and for a second your heart beats fast with the hope he’s going to offer to sleep in the bed with you. But then he opens his mouth. “Have you considered getting a large stuffed animal?”

The idea is appealing. You hadn’t held a stuffed animal even close to your size since you were maybe five, but you’d be damned if you let Bobby knew that.

“I will throw this chair at you,” you threaten.

He honest-to-god smirks. “You can’t even lift it.”

You do your best and succeed at tipping the chair over right into the window. The headrest smashes into the blinds and starts to go through the glass as well, but Bobby catches it at the last second and very carefully tips it back.

“Well, fuck,” you say, examining the crack in the glass.

“I don’t usually sleep at night,” Bobby says suddenly. His fingers are tapping that nervous pattern against his elbows again. “We could take turns sleeping in the bed?”

“Actually, that might be a good idea,” you remember what Harry said. “One of us should be on alert, just in case somebody tries to break down my door, too.”

Bobby tenses at the reminder, and his eyes flick toward the door like somebody’s about to jump out right now. “I will,” he promises, rubbing the sores on his arms. “I won’t let anything happen to you. I can stay awake for a long time.”

“Well, so can I,” you think ruefully of being so high on meth you wouldn’t even realize a week passed by until the high ran out and you crashed, starving, hallucinating, for days.

“Don’t take anything, please. Don’t take anything that’ll keep you awake, and I promise I won’t take anything,” Bobby’s eyes are fierce.

“I won’t,” you promise. “I’d rather die. I’m not joking, I’d rather die.”

He gets closer to you, one inch at a time. “Well, don’t do that either,” he lays a reluctant hand on your shoulder.

“I think I’ve done a pretty good job of not doing that,” you try to force some levity into the situation. “Now come on, you barely have any clothes, and my groceries have probably gone bad.”

It turns out to be a mistake, because you forgot it was Friday and not Monday, and the shop is crowded.

“I don’t need anything,” Bobby says sullenly. He flinches every time someone brushes past him.

“Is it because the police took your money? That’s fine. I can afford it for a couple days,” you walk in front of him so you’ll deal with the crowd and he can avoid people in your wake. You also fail at trying not to think about work. You’re missing almost a week’s worth of income, and you don’t even know if Bobby has a job.

“No, I brought the box. I don’t like it here. It’s too loud.”

“Okay, let’s go home, and then you can make a list for me of things you need, and I’ll get it,” you start to turn him to the exit.

“No,” he takes your hand. “I’m not leaving you alone.” Does he realize he’s humming to his usual six beats?

That gives you an idea. “Here,” you take his gloves off and hold them under his face so he can see them.

“They’re yours,” he still doesn’t meet your eyes. “They keep you from scratching.”

“I’m not scratching, they worked. Now put them on.”

He does, and with his hands covered, he doesn’t stop tapping, but nor is he flinching when people pass by him. You’re not arrogant enough to believe it’s because you’re holding his hand now.

He closes all the blinds once you get home, then opens them to close them again.

You leave him to it, opening up the refrigerator door to toss the rotten carrots and a bag of things that could be kiwis or apples out. The cherries are a little soft, but they look edible, and so do the wrinkly oranges, so you put the green bananas in between them to help them ripen faster.

“I’ll do it,” Bobby yanks the groceries out of your hands and starts rearranging your food.

“Can you leave the fruit where it is? I want the bananas to ripen faster.”

“You could’ve just bought ripe bananas,” he says.

“Yes, but I don’t eat them that fast,” you try to keep your temper in check.

He takes the bag of cherries. “These are old.”

“They’re still good,” you argue, trying to keep him from throwing them out.

“They’re old,” he insists.

“You’re not the one who’s eating them!” your voice is getting higher now.

“I don’t want them in the refrigerator. They get old and they become breeding grounds for bacteria.”

“It’s my refrigerator!”

He throws the cherries at you before storming out of the room, and you just barely catch them. He’s tapping his fingers so hard against the wall that you’re afraid he'll break them.

“Bobby-”

“SHUT UP! STOP TALKING!” he screams. His eyes are clenched shut and he’s doubled over. You wonder if his injuries are still bothering him, and all your anger drains out.

You drop the cherries behind the bananas so they’re hidden from view. “I’ll leave the groceries to put away how you want,” you say as you walk off to your room. You close the door quietly to avoid disturbing his rituals, turn around, and find his box at the top of his dresser.

You know this is invasive, but you need to know. You of all people know how tentative the hold on sobriety is, and if someone has hard drugs that you know is triggering for you, you have to protect yourself. Still, knowing that doesn’t make you feel any less awful to start singing Bonnie Tyler again to hide the sounds of you opening the box.

Well, that’s a lot of cash and not a lot of heroin, maybe. You can’t smell it like this, but you know what it looks like.

You leave everything where it is and close the box in favor of something you can control: sorting the laundry. That’s how Bobby finds you, and he lets out a little sigh of relief when he sees his box hasn’t been disturbed.

“There was so much noise,” he says harshly, and then he winces.

“I understand,” you try to reassure him. “Your life just got turned upside down, you lost your apartment, you’re in a whole new living situation with another person, your life is in danger by people you don’t know, and shopping in big crowds can be stressful. You’re trying to get your control back.”

“So are you,” Bobby insists. “You’ve got a new roommate, that roommate’s reminding you of the worst time of your life, and you’ve still got nightmares of that man you killed for me. I should let you have your comfort food, it’s not my comfort food.”

“Which is why I put the cherries somewhere harder to see,” you say. “And if there’s anything else I can do, let me know, alright? We can compromise as long as we talk to each other.” You take tentative steps toward him. “Thank you for being honest with me. Thank you for not hiding or getting high to avoid having this conversation.”

“You shouldn’t be proud. I'm just doing something you’ve been doing for years.”

“Well, too bad, because it's my feelings and I get to feel whatever I want,” you say, standing up. “Now, I’m going to make myself some food. Coming?”

He does, like you hoped. Honestly, that boy needs some meat on his bones.

“What do you like?” you ask, getting your cooking utensils out and leaving the doors open so he can rearrange them the way he likes. He’s doing you a favor, really, you don’t have any organizational system for most of your kitchen.

“I want to know how to make your favorite.”

You can’t help yourself from clutching your chest. “Lu mian it is,” you say, taking out the yellow bean sprouts from the fridge so you could snap the roots off. “Could you take the shredded beef out of the freezer and put it in the microwave to thaw?”

He obeys immediately, the sweetheart.

“Great. Now get me the big metal bowl and a plate from the dishwasher. The bowl’s on the top shelf, the plates are on the bottom, and you can organize it however you like after that.”

“Okay, you see that big three-layered pot in the corner? Take the top two pots off, fill the bottom pot about halfway with water, and then put it on any of the stoves and turn the heat to medium.”

The water turns on, then off, and the pot clinks against the stovepot. Only once.

“What else?”

“Get a porcelain bowl from the dishwasher, top shelf. And then you see the sauces next to the stove? One of them says ‘light soy sauce.’ Pour about a tablespoon of it into a bowl. When you're done with that, there's garlic in the fridge in the same place you keep your butter in your refrigerator. Dice five or six. The cutting board is next to the sink. Then mix the garlic in with the sauce, and when the beef’s thawed, pour it into the bowl and mix it again.”

The microwave dings, and he pours the beef into the bowl. “Like this?” he asks.

“Exactly, perfect.”

Is that a blush?

“Alright, what’s next?” he asks when he finishes.

“Next? Next you listen to me thank you for following my directions perfectly.”

Bobby blushes. He’s so beautiful.

“Is the water boiling yet?” you ask as you wash the sprouts.

“Um, it’s getting close, it’s bubbling.”

“Okay, take two chunks of noodles out of the freezer and put them on the plate. 30 seconds in the microwave should thaw them out enough for you to separate them.” The microwave dings right as you pour the water out of the sprouts. You leave the sprouts next to the sink, separate the top two pots, and walk up to Bobby as he takes out the noodles. “Okay, do exactly as I do,” you say, taking one chunk of noodle from him to unravel into one of the pots. He, of course, follows your instructions perfectly and his pot is much neater than yours, the show-off.

“The water’s boiling," he says, looking at the stove.

“Perfect,” you put your pot over his and put them over the pot already on the stove. Then you grab a pot and pour about two tablespoons of vegetable oil into it, and crank it up to high. “Okay, pour the beef and garlic in here,” you point.

He’s already brushed the mixture into the pot by the time you realize you didn’t give him the spatula, so rinse it out quickly before stirring the mixture with it. Steam hisses, and you roll up your sleeves.

That was a mistake.

You cover the scars as soon as you can, but Bobby is already horrified.

“It’s not that bad,” you focus on making sure the garlic doesn’t stick to the pot. “They were uglier before they healed,” you try to joke.

Bobby rolls up his sleeves, too, so you can see his bruised injection sites. He makes eye contact the whole time, daring you to call yourself ugly again. You nod in acquiescence, and he takes over stirring for you. “How long do I do this for?” he asks.

“Until the meat turns brown,” you say, grabbing the bowl of sprouts. “Move over, I'm going pour this in.”

“Do I mix it in?” he asks. You’re so close to him that you can feel his warmth.

“Yes,” you squeak with a dry mouth. You don’t want to move. “A little more than that,” you say, peering at the pot. “A little more,” and technically this is good enough, but you don’t want to move. “A little more.”

The dry hiss of the noddle pot tells you that it needs more water, snapping you out of your stupor.

“Take the top two pots off,” you say, filling the metal bowl with water to pour into the bottom pot. Then you take the top pot off and put it on the bottom pot. “Now put yours on top of mine.” Man, you would love to say that in a different context.

When the noodles are done, you mix them into the meat and sprouts, and then you both sit down to enjoy your meal. Neither of you have rolled down your sleeves.

“I can’t remember when the noise really started getting to me,” Bobby says suddenly. “I remember the first time I lost my tooth, I kept counting my teeth. I don’t think anybody knew what I was doing yet. And then I had to do more and more. At some point, whenever I went out, I had to count all the trees, and if they weren’t in six, I couldn’t go to where I need unless I counted enough trees to fit six. So I stopped going out, things were just too scary. I broke my fingers one day, to try to keep myself from counting, and the doctor gave me Valium. It made me feel like I was floating, and when it wore off, I had to feel it again. When I’m on heroin, the world isn’t so scary anymore. But the noise always gets through again.”

You reach halfway across the table and lay your open hand down. “When I was thirteen, one of my friends had expired pills they let me take, because I was tired all the time and I didn’t know why. And I still don’t know. I just had to keep taking more and more of it to just stay awake, and then I started mixing other amphetamines. And then when I was fifteen, one of the people I used to buy from said he had something better than expired pills. He gave me crystal meth. He told me he’d inherited this mansion from his uncle, and it was full of the stuff. It was probably just an abandoned building, but it was always full of people using everything he sold.”

Bobby’s eyes are wet, but they’re looking right at yours, and he takes your hand. “How did you stop?”

You chuckle. “Honestly, my sister. My entire family stopped talking to me after they found out I was a tweaker. And one day, when I was too tired to care how much I took, I ended up having a heart attack. I still don’t know how she found me, but she did, and she called an ambulance and kept me alive until it got there. When I woke up, she was next to my hospital bed. She didn’t speak to me, but she locked me in her apartment while fluids poured out of me from both ends, and you have to really love somebody to do that while they’re screaming about how much they hate you.”

Bobby swallows. “Does your family talk to you now?”

“Yeah, eventually. It took a while to get my dad to come around. But having Chloe around to vouch for me really helped,” your eyes are blurring. You rub the tears away roughly, but they’re soon replaced by many more.

Bobby lifts his fingers and wipes them away.

“Thanks,” you say into your noodles.

“I’m sorry you were alone,” he says with way too much feeling.

“Well, once you get past the ‘Holy shit I almost died’ thing, you stop being so scared of things that aren't likely to kill you right this second,” you try to smile. It feels wrong on your face.

Your ex’s chair squeaks when Bobby stands up. You’re not sure what he's doing as he walks around the table, but his face is determined, so you don't say anything as he opens his arms and covers you in a hug.

[mariomandzho]

dejan lovren x reader friends to lovers drabble

description: you are just one of the boys to dejan lovren, until he develops feelings for you and spirals into madness /  feel free to request more here word count: 3,550  featuring: dejan lovren x reader, luka modrić, šime vrsaljko 

warnings: none. 

please like & reblog!

You were always one of the boys. 

You met Dejan at a party when you were in college and he was playing for Lyon. Your friend introduced him to you, and though you’d never admit it now, you harbored a little crush on him that night, until he drunkenly spilled his drink on your dress and you made a pact to remain friends. “You probably don’t want to go out with me now after that, do you?” He asked, and you shook your head. 

“And you don’t want to make out with a girl who smells like vodka, do you?” You asked, and he shook his head. For eight years after that, you were best friends – practically inseparable. This was the beginning of the end. 

He wasn’t afraid to make gross jokes around you, make passes at other women in front of you, curse, smoke, drink like a fish, and engage in locker room talk when you were around. You were just one of the guys, and when he asked you if you thought so-and-so had a nice ass, you’d answer. Yeah, but not my type. “She’s got great rack, doesn’t she?” Sure, if you’re into the ‘botched’ look, Dejan. He had other guy friends, but no one like you – he told you once, drunkenly, you were the only person on Earth who’d never lie to him. You told him he was the only person in the world you’d never want to lie to, but he didn’t remember the next morning and you never brought it up again. 

He had girlfriends throughout the years and even proposed to someone, although it amounted to nothing, but you remained single and if you did hook up with someone, you kept it private. Dejan would always joke about setting you up with someone, but you’d wave away the suggestion. You wanted to find ‘the one,’ you told him, someone who would change your life forever. Dejan never understood; he went through girlfriends like candy, and slept with whoever he wanted. 

“What do you even know about setting girls up with other guys?” You asked him. 

“All girls are the same. You want someone who brings the flowers and opens the car doors. It’s all smoke and mirrors.”

You felt your heart tighten; did true love mean nothing to him? 

You get asked all the time if you’re secretly dating or sleeping together. When his brother gets married and he asks you to be his plus-one, his family bombards you and pesters you with questions. Do you like him? Does he like you? Have you screwed yet? You both flagged down questions left and right, but you could feel your cheeks heating up as he drew you onto the dance floor and suavely pulled you into his arms. You never knew he could dance, and as he swept you along the edge of the ballroom you felt yourself swallowing a bitter pill of truth. You promised you’d never fall in love with him, but tonight... you almost could. 

“Are you mad at me? Did I fuck this up, too?” This is what he asks you, standing outside your door and soaking wet in the rain, after two weeks of you ignoring him. Purposefully dodging his calls. Deleting his texts. God, he’d even attempted to contact you via e-mail and on his Xbox account. In your eight years of friendship, you’d never gone longer than a week of not talking to him – of purposefully ignoring him – but after the wedding you found that you couldn’t look at him without intrusive, unwanted thoughts creeping into your brain. You loved him. It hurt not talking to him, but it hurt worse to see him. 

“You didn’t do anything. I’ve just been busy.” You spoke through the peephole. 

“Can I come in?” He hoisted up a brown bag of take-out, “I’ve got Chinese. Your favourite.”

“You hate Chinese,” you countered. 

“I know, it’s disgusting, but it’s your favorite and damn it, [Y/N], I’m balls deep in rainwater out here. Whatd’ya say, can I come in?”

You breathed in deeply and cracked open the door.

Things fall back into routine once Dejan starts dating again, giving you the space you need to sort your... dilemma... out. He invites you out one night for drinks to meet her. She’s blonde, perky, and a recent college-grad. Probably too young for him, but you try not to dwell on it. Dejan goes on and on about how you’re his eldest friend, and you smile tightly, drink your Club Soda, and pray that the ground opens up and swallows you whole as he recounts the time you two vacationed in Cancún and had to go to the hospital because sand fleas bit you on your ass.

It’s better this way, you tell yourself, because you should be happy for Dejan, and the more time he spends with her, the less time you spend gazing dazedly into his eyes. Slowly, but surely, the deeper in love he falls with her, the less in love you are with him. He sends you postcards from a holiday in Costa Rica, her smiling face tucked into the crook of his neck, and it doesn’t even sting. It doesn’t even hurt. (As long as you don’t think about the scent of his cologne). Finally. It isn’t long before you can tell him you’re happy for him and really mean it; it isn’t long before you can finally move on with your life. 

He calls you one night at two in the morning. The rain is pounding on your roof, the moon shines ominously through the curtains. Your lights flicker on as you answer the call, “h–hello? Dejan?” 

“Yeah, it’s me.” His voice is breathless and lost, aimless and empty. 

“What’s wrong? Where are you? It’s two thirty in the morning.”

“She–she fucking cheated, [Y/N].” 

“Who did?” 

“It doesn’t fucking matter. None of it matters. You’re the only one who wouldn’t lie to me. The only fucking one–God damn it!” Your heart caved in on itself. All this time, he remembered? You heard him smash something in the background, like a glass vase crashing against marble floors. He was practically screaming into the phone. “I was going to do it. Really do it this time. A nice ring, Zagreb, like we promised. It’s all over.”

You thought the bray of your heart beating could be heard over the phone. “Dejan. Where are you? I’m coming to get you. You shouldn’t be by yourself tonight.” 

Dejan’s heart is broken for the first time in his life, and it’s hard to watch him, but you help him shoulder the burden and within a few months you have your best friend back. Not your best friend searching listlessly for engagement rings, not your best friend nearly killing himself trying to make his girlfriend happier, trying to make his enemies proud, but Dejan: the boy you met at a party eight years ago. This version of Dejan still asks you about other girl’s asses, but he holds the door for you when you go to a restaurant, and brings you flowers on your birthday. You drag him to boutiques so you can get his ‘expert’ advice on dresses; you call him before dates to ask whether guys preferred the ‘natural or pushed up bra look’, and he doesn’t even flinch. You have dinner together, and watch disgustingly cute rom-coms, and throw popcorn at each other when the main characters kiss. 

If things could get any better, you didn’t know how. 

You, Dejan and Luka head out for beers in the city one night. Dejan is wearing a leather jacket and his hair is gelled back, and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was dressing to impress. Only, the reality is much worse: he’s effortlessly handsome. Luka slips away to the bathroom and you’re left to survey the bar; your eyes, smoked out with black liner, dart from guy to guy. Gay, married, ugly, old. No one seemed the least bit suitable.

“What the hell are you doing?” His voice was hoarse and raspy from the shot he’d just thrown back. “You look like a predator.” 

“Shut up.” You punched his shoulder. “Look, I don’t want to get into details, but you need to find me someone. My mother won’t stop pestering me about my eggs drying out and I need a plus one for her sixtieth birthday, and she knows we’re not together so it can’t be you.”

“So, your only other alternative is some guy you met in a crap bar?” You nodded, chewing your bottom lip, “alright, fine. What about that guy? I think he’d be a good lay.”

“No. I can barely see his upper lip under that squirrel mustache he’s sporting.”

“That would be Šime. What about that one, ten o’clock?” 

“Hmm... oh, God, no. Combovers are still a thing?”

“Okay, Miss Picky, what about that guy? Blonde dude to your left.”

Luka sidled up to the bar and pulled up a stool next to Dejan, ordering another round of shots for the table. “Where did [Y/N] go? She’s going to miss the best part.”

“She’s flirting with some guy,” Dejan cocked his head toward where you were, “wants to get laid apparently.”

“And you’re just going to let him talk to your girlfriend?” Luka chuckled, drowning in another pint of beer.

Dejan uttered the words he’d said a thousand times over, “she’s not my girlfr–.” But the look Luka sent him made him stop short and knit his brows together. “What?”

“Hey, you’re the one that stopped.” Luka held his hands up. When Dejan wouldn’t stop glaring at him, he continued, “Don’t give me that crap. I don’t expect you to lie, but you can’t look me in the eyes and tell me it doesn’t bother you the least bit that she’s going to go home with another guy tonight. When’s the last time that happened?” 

Dejan sent another glance in your direction and felt his fingertips tighten around his beer. “I can’t remember.”

The look the guy was giving you ticked him, got under his skin, and not for the first time in his life he wondered if things would be different if he went home with you that night at the party, instead of acting like a dick and screwing some meaningless girl.

Three weeks later, you are convinced that there must be an alien invading your best friend. This is the only explanation for why he’s suddenly stuttering, blushing, and pretending that he doesn’t know the directions to your apartment. This is the only reason why he could possibly feign offense when you ask him if he thinks another girl is hot, or if he’d actually bang Megan Fox. “I just don’t want to talk about things like that anymore,” he says, leaving you in stunted silence. 

“Jeez, what are you on your period?”

“Shut up, [Y/N].” 

He gets injured later that month. Something in his hamstrings. The doctor says it won’t take long to heal but that he should prop the leg up and remain on bedrest for at least a week. Because you know Dejan, and you know that he can’t stay motionless for more than half a second, you show up at his door with Chinese food, chick flicks, and beer. “Don’t worry about getting up to answer the door,” you call out to him through the walls, “I have a key.”

“What the fuck? [Y/N]!” He throws a pillow at the door that manages to bounce off you when you walk in. Burrowing into a blanket, all you can see is the tips of his hair. He doesn’t want you to see him – doesn’t want anyone to see him this way – but what you don’t know is that he doesn’t want you, specifically, to see him.

“Oh, so you did get my calls? I’ve come bearing gifts and to make sure you, mister, don’t move a muscle. What should we watch first, 27 Dresses or A Walk to Remember?” 

“Neither. I’d rather suffocate.” 

“27 Dresses it is.” You sit on the couch next to him and place a hand on his shoulder. He flinches, but doesn’t try to swat your touch away. “Dejan, I’m here for you. I’m not going to let you hurt yourself and jeopardize your career, it’s too important to you, and you’re important to me.”

He pulls down the blankets an inch.

“And I brought beer.”

“Finally, you’re useful for something.” 

He leans on you and you help guide him to his bedroom. He’s doing everything he can not to bear weight on his bad leg, and hobbles over to the bathroom before he climbs into bed. It’s so pitiful you nearly laugh, for which he turns around and shoots you the bird. Once he’s in bed, you pull the covers up and over his body, tuck it under his arms and legs (like his mother used to do), make sure the pillows are comfortable and that his leg isn’t being touched by anything. You leave a glass of water and ibuprofen tablets on his bedside table and kiss his forehead before turning out the lights. He grasps your wrist before you can leave. “Thank you for coming tonight,” he says sincerely. 

“Of course.”

The moonlight shines in his dark eyes as they gaze at you devotedly. “I’m sorry I was an ass.”

“Tonight or the past eight years?”

“Nine.”

“What?”

“Next month will be nine years.”

Your twenty-ninth birthday rolls around on a Saturday and your girl best friend, the one that introduced you to your guy best friend, plans you an elaborate birthday bash. There’s a barbecue in the backyard and a dance party in the living room, and you count all twenty-nine years as blessings, although you’ve secretly resolved yourself to start telling people you’re twenty-five. You’re swearing that a new wrinkle has sprouted on your face when Dejan arrives, and he sets down an armful of gifts to wrap you in his arms and spin you around. “Happy birthday, grandma,” he whispers in your ear.

“You’re older than me, grandpa,” you shoot back, squeezing him as hard as humanely possible. “Thank you for coming.”

“I wouldn’t miss it. I brought Luka, hope that’s alright.”

“Of course it is. The more the merrier.”

Luka ends up being a saving grace – a blessing in disguise – because, shortly after you kiss your boyfriend on the stroke of midnight, Dejan makes the decision to get hammered. He’s sloppy and intolerant, draping himself across furniture and falling on top of your family members, apparently blathering to your guests about how he’d think you’d be a good shag. Ironically, he ends up throwing up on you, and he says, “I didn’t think I could ever love a girl covered in throw-up.”

“Dejan, you’re drunk.” You look around. Everyone’s eyes are glued to you, and the mess on your white dress, but only Luka dares to meet your gaze. Help me, you mouth. “You should go home.”

“I don’t wanna. I’m–I’m tired of going home. You know?”

“No, I don’t. You’re talking nonsense.” You cross your arms over your chest, “why are you doing this?”

“Because you shouldn’t be with him.”

“C’mon, Dejan, let’s go.” Luka wraps an arm around his friend and attempts to haul the taller man away, “we’ll get you home before you say something you’ll really regret.”

“Stop.” He swats Luka away, “[Y/N], listen to me, because I’ve got ten minutes before I’m going to pass out, but it shouldn’t have been this way. We did it all wrong. You shouldn’t date some blonde, good-for-nothing, plastic Barbie doll–” (“Hey!”) “you, you should date..”

“Who should I date, Dejan?”

“For God’s sake, [Y/N], me. I love you.” 

You don’t talk to him. How could you possibly talk to him after he threw up on you, embarrassed you in front of everyone you knew, insulted the only guy you’ve cared about (other than him, of course) in years, and declared his love for you publicly? It didn’t matter that he sent cards, texted you constantly and left weekly voicemails. You couldn’t bring yourself to even contemplate forgiving him.  

You meet with Luka for lunch one afternoon, and he tells you exactly what you’re expecting him to say. Dejan is a mess. He’s sorry. He misses you. He’s an asshole. “I know,” you say, digging your fork into your food, and as if sensing your discomfort Luka expertly swerves the conversation Dejan Lovren. Finally. 

It finally feels like the end. 

You stand with your hands on your hips, looking out at the view of your new office. It is the first time in your life that you have your own office, instead of a cubicle, and you feel an itch bubbling underneath your skin. You want to tell him–so badly. Maybe he’d make a joke about it, but at the end of the day no one would be prouder of you than Dejan. He’d spin you around in his arms and promise to take you to an expensive restaurant. He’d toast to your promotion with champagne and a box of chocolates. He’d be so happy for you. It makes your heart hurt. Damn him for making what was supposed to be a joyous occasion hurt. 

You gather your things in a cardboard box and bound down the stairwell to the lobby. Greeting the receptionist as you breeze by her, the automatic doors pry open and the summer air greets you, enveloping your body in an uncomfortably humid hug. 

“Y/N.”

His voice hits you like to the slap to the face, and you can still feel the sting of your skin as you turn around to face him. He’s thinner, the circles around his eyes darker, but still effortlessly and classically handsome; his dark hair windswept, a white dress shirt hugging the muscular contours of his broad chest, black slacks clutching onto his thighs and calves. “Dejan, what are you doing here? How did you kno–.”

“Don’t talk. I know that’s hard for you – but please, until I finish, don’t talk. I need to get something off my chest if it’s the last time we ever speak.” You open your mouth to argue, but he holds up a finger, indicating for you to stay quiet. Your shoulders droop out of curiosity you decide to let him speak. “I am sorry. Hell, [Y/N], for the past nine years. I’m sorry for all of it and I’m sorry I didn’t understand anything about what I felt for you before now.”

“What you felt for me?”

“Feel. I still love you, and I probably have for a long time.”

“Dejan...”

“I want–need to know if you feel the same. Or if there’s any possibility you ever could. You put up with me for this long. You can hate me for the rest of your life; you can never forgive me because I don’t expect you to. But it breaks my heart, because you’ve changed me, and... I love you. I couldn’t say it before but I can say it right now. And I also want to say that I’m sorry about your party.”

You could scarcely fathom a response, but the words you’ve been itching to say tumbled out of your mouth. “I got promoted today. At work. I’m not someone’s assistant anymore. I can’t go back to being your groupie.” 

“You got promoted?” You nodded. “[Y/N,] that’s fantastic.”

“I missed you.” 

“You did?” 

“And you’re not completely to blame, you know. I knew I had feelings for you, too.”

“You did? Since when?”

You glanced upward, wishing the ground would swallow you whole, “since your brother’s wedding.”

“My brother’s wedding? Four years ago?” 

“M-maybe.” 

“And those feelings... have they changed?” 

You glanced at him, then, feeling like you were once again drowning in his dark eyes. Suddenly, you were twenty-five again, and he was sweeping you onto the dance-floor while Ella Fitzgerald crooned over the radio. It was just you and Dejan, and while you knew your heart was going to be broken then, things are different now. You are both older, maybe not wiser, but definitely more experienced. 

You clamped your eyes closed and shook your head. Within an instance, he crossed the distance between you two and took your shoulders in his hands. “You’re not going to get down on one knee, are you? Because nine years is a little too soon for me,” you groaned.

“Shut up. Let me kiss you, you brat.” 

You took the initiative and placed your hand on his jaw, feeling the bristles of stubble underneath your fingertips. Lifting onto your heels, you graced your mouth against his, and in one swift movement his broad shoulders lean down and your lips are met by the warmness of his own. He deftly pries apart your jaw and his tongue runs along the edge of your teeth, coaxing you into submission, as his hands pull you nearer to his chest. 

When you – at last – draw apart, you breathe in deeply, inhaling the musky undertones of his cologne. “Why did we never do that before?”

“I was a stupid, stupid man.”

“Promise me we won’t stop?” 

He sealed your new pact with another kiss. 

@vatreniworld @living-lovren @why-wonder-if-theres-amore @marilyn-mandzukic

[henraryyyyy]

BTS Reaction They get a boner when you sneeze

Warning/s: little smut

SEOKJIN

You had an extremely weird habit of bending your body down every time you sneeze. And that did a lot to Seokjin each time your body would bend down in front of him.

It was a saturday, Seokjin’s free day, and you both wanted to stay inside watching movies, cuddling, cooking together...

“Hey (Y/N)! Let’s cook something,” your boyfriend offer excitedly, grabbing your hand dragging you to the kitchen with you trailing behind him body spread on the floor while being pulled by him.

“Calm down big boy,” you chuckled standing up in front of him. “The kitchen is not going anywhere.” you assured him with a smile. “Unless you let Namjoon cook,” you laugh. “if that’d happen this kitchen probably will end on fire.”

He laughed along, giving you a light peak on the corner of your mouth before rounding your body towards the worktop, taking a big boll and placing it above the counter.

 You went besides him but stopped abruptly when you felt the small tickling sensation on your nose, slowly you started to lightly inhaling small amounts of air to make the sneeze fly out.

But while you were on your own bubble Seokjin noticed it. He knew you better than anyone else, and he obviously realize your weird habit was going to happen soon, with you in front of the hard marble table, the marble table that could hurt his lover’s head once your body bend down with the strong move of your sneeze. He speedily turned your body around, your back towards his chest.

  When the molest tickling faded away you realized what had just happen. Your upper body was bended in front and your ass crashed onto your boyfriend private parts making a sudden moan leave his lips. Slowly you tilted your head and looked at him over your shoulder, feeling the way his friend down there was growing by each second that passed.

When your eyes found his you knew you were screwed.

“I need you.”

Yes. You were really screwed.

NAMJOON

Namjoon is aware of the way a woman’s body works like, and yours better than any other. He knew —in fact— loved everything about you inside and out; he was very conscious about the way you acted when you had a problem, and he was so infatuated in love with the way you thought, the way your brain tied so perfectly with his, like if they were connected in any way. And same goes for you, you knew Namjoon as the palm of your hand; knew when he was stressed, when he needed his space and when he only needed you, your comforting presence. And now you’re here unexpectedly —even though you knew it was gonna happen anyways. Kim Namjoon, the man you loved and the man who has an intelectual coefficient of 184 forgot his clothes at home. He called you ten minutes ago telling you that he, your so Intelligence dorky boyfriend, forgot his training clothes for his training practice this morning. It doesn’t make sense, right? Well, it looks like he left with only his blue pijama of his favorite Kakao character —Ryan— and his set of sneakers. You were mad at him. Of course you were! It was your day off after months of nonstop working, and receiving a phone call at five in the morning was devastating. But you loved him too much, and that was what made you now stand in front of the building of your boyfriend’s company with the bag with his clothes in one hand and another with seven coffees on the other. “Babe i’m really sorry— Namjoon started apologizing but you stoped him with a light hit of your hip into his while you passed by with a giggle. “It’s fine,” you assured him placing both bags on the couch besides the mirror of the room. “I brought coffee guys!” You added cheerfully. There were lots of “oh my gods” and “thank yous” and even some “you’re the best” laughs by the others members, who happily drank the hot liquid. “You really are the best, you know that, right?” Namjoon came from behind you placing both hands on your hips making your body turn around. “Obvious— your loud exhale of air resonate round the four walls with the act of a sneeze, you jumped a bit, not expecting that sudden movement. You felt him tense. Looking up at him you saw where he had his gaze plastered on. “You’re not wearing bra?!” He whispered-shouted onto your ear, his grip tightening. “I just woke up,” you confessed, a bit embarrassed by the situation. “You know i always sleep without it.” “Fuck babe...” Namjoon groan, feeling himself getting hard. “I have a problem right now.” You watched his stressed face, chuckling with your hand in front of your mouth trying to hide it a bit. “Tath’s your punishment for making me come all the way here at this hours on my day off.” You said starting to walk towards the door before he stopped you once again. “I’ll make it up to you tonight,” Namjoon whispered. “For all  the inconveniences this morning.”

And surely he did make it up to you. Twice in a row.

YOONGI

This man —your man— was almost twenty-four hours during all seven days of the week inside his studio. You loved how much potential he put into each and every song he did, but you worried about him a lot too, about the fact that he didn’t even go out to eat or go to the toilet either. That was why the Bangtan members called you, to make this owl came out of his cave for once finally.

“Yah! Old man, do you even have any intention of getting out from here?” You questioned at your boyfriend, sitting down on the floor beside his chair that was  in front of one of his thousands of computers. “Because, it starts to smell like shit.” You commented pinching your nose with your thumb and index finger and moving the other in front of your covered nose like trying to move the hoggish air from you. “Yeah,” Suga says unemotionally. “That was my intention.” “Then if you’re not coming out for the good, you’ll do for the bad,” you adverted standing up. “Yeah?” He laughed at your tried of a threat. “What you gonna do?” Yoongi teasingly asked still chucking. “Haul me and my chair outside?” “That’s exacly what I’m going to do,” you affirmed grabbing the chair supporter and start moving it towards the door with him sitting on it. “Thanks god it has wheels.” You whispered to yourself. “Hey!” Your boyfriend cracked surprised by your sudden aggressive drag. “I was just kididng— babe! Stop, I don’t want to go out,” he whine grabbing your arm stopping you. “I was almost finished— You turned around, arms crossed on your chest, a pout on your mouth and a frown on your face. “You hear me Min Yoongi,” you started, surprising him by your mad tone. “You cannot do that to your members— you cannot worry them the way you’re doing-- neither to me,” you started, voice more softly this time. “You can’t do that to yourself, you can’t lock yourself in here without eating. No, no you cannot do that...” you whispered lowly, voice cracking a soft sob remembering the others time this happened. He worked so hard on himself that he even started to faint with more regularity than normal, you couldn’t let that happen again, it broke your heart see the man you love so desperately let himself die little by little. “(Y/N)...” Yoongi’s voice murmured your name, you sob harder, it’s been so long since you heard him call out your name like this. “Please, baby, don’t cry,” he reassured pulling your body into his, the warmth of his body made you calm a bit, him in general made your body unintentionally relax. “I’ll get out of here now, with you, I promise, so please don’t cry,” Yoongi say wiping your tears that you didn’t notice that it did fall, pushing gently your body towards the door. “It breaks my heart— Stop. His breath did stop in between his words, making his passionate phrase go to hell, as well as his self-control. You had the habit of covering your nose with your shirt when you sneeze, and so you did that in the exact moment you sneezed in front of your boyfriend, lifting your comfy shirt up until your face, revealing your black lace bra you brought a long time ago for Yoongi’s birthday present —he loved it, in fact, it was his favorite lingerie. “O-oh— Shit—“ your embarrassing boyfriend stuttered with a shy smile that he hided behind his hands. “I don’t think I can leave the studio now...” he whispered loud enough for you to hear. “You promised!” You argue. “Yeah, i did say i’ll go out of here with you,” he affirm. “But you are not gonna leave either.” “What? Why?” You questioned confused, but all clicked when he grabbed the strips of your pants and crashed his hips into yours possessively, and then you felt it —he had a boner just because a simple black bra, yet he loved it, loved how a simple undergarment looked so good on you, how sexy you looked with it —and more without it. Looking up at his face you could see need and want, yours probably were sending the same expression because with a fast move Yoongi came down planting his lips on yours with more fervor that he’d ever had. You gulped once the kiss ended and he was occupied with your neck... you sure weren’t coming out of his stupid studio any time soon... you were more than sure of that.

HOSEOK

BigHit gave BTS’s members a week free after all these euphoric passed month. The first day, he went to his hometown to visit his family. Hobi insisted for you to come along with him, saying how much his mother scolded him for taking you away from her all the time, and how much his father told him to bring you to their house on Gwangju all  week so he could teach you lots and lots of thing in there, like hike together how you always did with your boyfriend’s parents when you went to his downtown. You would have loved to go there, you missed Hoseok’s mother and father, as well as his sister, who you were a close friend of. But sadly you had work, and they needed you urgently these few days before weekend. So you stayed here in Seoul and unfortunately you caught a light cold by the weird changes of weather. Once your amazing boyfriend returned home —alongside with thousands of bags with his mom’s cookings —you loved it—, and some bags of that plant you were so in love with, in love with the scent it has, so pure and refreshing. You were sure that was from his father, he knew better than anyone how desperately you searched for it each time you hike together. “Mom gave me food for like a entire year— and more maybe.” Hoseok laughed closing the front door with his foot before approaching your burrito body that stretched comfortably on the couch. You chuckled, leaving lazily te couch to help him with the amount of bags he held strongly into his arms. “I love her food.” You confessed placing some heavy bags onto the kitchen counter. 

“I know that,” your boyfriend chuckled hugging you from behind. You tilted your head backwards onto his chest, feeling his heart beat with a peaceful rhythm. “You always let out loud moans while eating it,” he add laughing harder, but before you could confront him he continued. “Sometimes i think that my mom’s food can pleasure you better than i can.” “Yah! Hoseok, stop it!” You grunt faking your mad expression that was not long on your face, replaced with chuckled mingled with his loud laughs. “Sorry Hot Stuff— You hit him playfully on his chest with your hands grabbing tightly onto the blanket that still concealed your body. “You’re so mean! I told you to stop calling me that,” you acknowledging. “You know how embarrassing was for me when you called me that in front of the other members?” “I remember,” Hoseok laugh. “Namjoon almost pee on his pants from laughing with the expression you did.” He add still laughing uncontrollably. “It was pretty funny, you should have seen it.” “How can i se— The loud sound of your sneeze resonates throw the kitchen where the laughters of your boyfriend came into a instantly halt, transformed on an unwilling groan at the sight in front of him. The blanked that once was covering your naked body was now perfectly fallen into the cool floor. You tried to cover yourself with both arms —blinded by the embarrassed to not think straight and not take the blanket instead of trying to hide your nude body from your boyfriend. Hoseok started laughing anew at the weird posture you were doing with the intention of covering your body he knew so well, and was so genuinely in love with. “W-why are you laughing?” You ask trying to sound annoyed, but the sound of his laughters, the sound of his happiness was completely and utterly impossible of making you annoyed, moreover it was the other way around. “You’re trying so hard to cover yourself,” Hoseok started. “But I don’t understand why,” he add. “I’ve seen you like this lots of times already. And now you’ll have to help me with this little problem, will you, right hot stuff?” And once again his loud lively sounds of happiness sounded round your kitchen, at your blushing mess of a face appeared a smile that formed a chuckle, mixed with his. It was moments like this you enjoy the most, moments that someday will be nothing more than just memories of a past, keepsakes you’ll love to share with the family one day you’d love to have with this childish, loud and energetic man —nevertheless your man, your childish, loud and energetic man you lives for and loved so damn much.

JIMIN

You both loved wasting your insignificantly free time into each others arms, being a cuddling session or something more sensual, it didn’t matter if you were together. 

 Jimin loved to do lots of skin ship with you, for that reason when you both were in front of members he hated holding himself from just cracking your body into his; but he knew the members would tease the hell out of him if he did that, so he hold himself back in front and smushed you afterwards. Actually you both were sat down on the couch of your house; you lived alone, so he preferred coming to yours than going to his mess of a dorm where all the members were probably doing anything but stay quite. Jimin loved his members more than his live itself, but in moments like this —after an stressful day— he just needed you with him in a peaceful silenced space. And that’s what you both were doing right now. Your boyfriend’s hands were rubbing your hair softly, gently, trying to not pull any hair to hard to make you any kind of pain. Because Jimin hated when you were hurt, and more when it was him the cause of it. Relationships have fights, stupids or childish they’re fights after all. It was normal for you two to have differences in some things, and stress, plus bad days, did not help on being calm about it... so you both blow out your feelings into each others with shouts and yells that in the end are nothing more than whispers as apologizes on bed. Together you went through a lot, from his insecurities and jealousies, to your own vulnerability and low self-love; but you always found your way to stay strong together no matter what happened, because for him a day without you was like a day without a purpose, a black and dark unlivable day without its sun; and for you a day without your shy mochi was like if you were nothing more than a plant, a dying plant even. A plant who was alone and defenseless, without warm rays of sun who make it grow up and make love the live as it is, with its beauty and its crudeness. “Jagi,” Jimin’s angelic voice whispered down onto your head that comfortably lay on his lap planting a soft kiss on your temple, head looking onto his tummy, the tummy you loved so much. You loved how  imperfect he was, because that was what made him so real. “Are you sleeping?” He asked stroking your hair out of your face. “Hey! Jagi?” You hummed, shaking your head on his lap with your eyes closed. Letting out a content sigh you completely disconnected your tense body and let it relax on your lovers comfy lap. “Why don’t we go to bed?” Jimin asked you anew, but you shook your head again; you were overly accommodate, surely you did not want to move now, probably not later as well. “I don’t want to,” you grunt hugging his thighs with both arms tightly, refusing to let him go. Jimin loosen soft laughters at the adorable reaction and action of yours, he loves how cute you were without even noting it, how natural and right felt to have you shifting and wagging on his lap, the place he was now more confident of thank to you, thank to the love you give to it day by day. Each day that pass he feel more comfortable with his body —more confident even, and that’s thanks to you and your deep appreciation on his body. That may be something you do unrealized or it may be realized by you, but this it did meant a lot to him; and that actions of yours were what made him fall even deeper in love with you. “Babe— Baby,” Your boyfriend called between chuckles. “We can cuddle on bed,” he assured. “It’ll be more comfortable.” You shake your head again but stopped immediately when you felt the oh-so-familiar tingle on your nose. “Jagi?” Jimin asked confusedly by your sudden halt. “You okay?” Ignoring him you started moving your nose, like you always did before the loud exhale came. Finally when the sneeze left you, your face went forward, colliding with Jimin’s crotch. Separating your head from your lover’s lower part you heard a deep whine from him. With a weird look on your face you locked eyes with Jimin —who started laughing and moving his body shyly. “You’d got hard because of a sneeze?” You voice out snuggling your head on his lap muffling your amount of giggles. Jimin whine again. “Stop,” he demand, his hands on your hair tightening; not too hard to hurt you, but not too light to not feel it. “You’re in big trouble, lady.” After these words —that affected you a lot— left his plump lips that went captive by his teeth, with a fast move you were being elevated from the couch in  bride style, your impatient and hard boyfriend walking— more like, running to your bedroom, where a long ass ride of a night is waiting for both of you.

TAEHYUNG

It was your birthday and probably the worst you’ve ever had. You were absolutely tired of your long exhausting day at work, your family couldn’t make it to your house because of the weather and your boyfriend, the famous BTS member Kim Taehyung, could not make it as well; he had some urgent errands with the other members in America, and the storm made all airports cancel all flights. Taehyung wished you a happy birthday through message, but for now it was the worst. You were now lying on your bed —that felt horribly empty without your adorable clingy boyfriend, who loved cuddling you to death almost. The bed was spreading cold on your body, and the fever you caught wasn’t helping on warming it either. “I miss you...” you murmured groggily, the medicine you drank down your throat did have some weird effects on you, and left in your mouth the disgusting flavor of it. “I missed you too baby girl!” There was a loud chant, and seconds later a heavy weight above your weak body. You let out a painful groan, and hundreds of apologizes were heard afterwards. “Tae?” Your eyes widen when you catch the eyes of your lover. “What are you doing here? I thought yo— Your words were cut off by his lips crashing down on yours. With as much passion as him you kissed back, until you remembered you were sick, and he could catch it because of you. Slowly you pushed him away from your body, making Taehyung look down at you confused and with a pout plastered on his lips. “Why?” He questioned. “I’m sick,” you admit. “I don’t want you getting sick for my fault.” Your boyfriend let a curse out from his mouth with your name following behind. “I don’t care,” Taehyung continued. “If i wanna kiss my girlfriend, i’ll kiss my girlfriend.” He kissed you again, and again, and one more time; peaking your lips while playfully rubbing his nose with yours. “You’re such a dork,” you chuckled drawing soft circles on each of his cheeks with your both thumbs. Taehyung hummed peaking your lips a last time before resting besides you. “At least i’m your dork,” he chuckled along. “Why didn’t you tell me you were sick?” He asks. With a sigh you rested your head on his chest, limbs cuddling him from the side. “I didn’t want you worrying about me,” you snitch. “And why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” You asked back. “It was a surprise,” he laughed, limbs intertwined with yours in the most perfect messy position. “Happy birthday, baby girl.” He wished for the second time in that day. You shyly hide your head on his chest, the chest that was rumbling with non stoping laughters. You planted a light kiss there tilting your head back to look at his face. Before you knew it the sneeze who you didn’t feel coming, blow out suddenly, making one of your legs to brush on his loins making him gasp and push one of his twined legs around your waist, pushing you more into him. A low and deep “shit” spill out his mouth in a whisper. “Sorry,” you apologize rubbing your sleeve on your nose sniffing a bit. “Babe...” Taehyung groaned with his head thrown backwards, hitting the soft pillow. “Why am i like this?” He questioned to no one in general. “What?” You innocently asked. Your boyfriend looked down at you bitting at his lower lip before slipping his tongue to where his teeth were sinked on. “What happened?” “I just got hard...” he confess, his voice lowering by each word. “...because you sneezed.” With a blush on your face you averted your eyes down on his pants, where a bulge it really did form on. “Oh...” your mouth opened a bit, closing only when your lips sealed it together. “Could you... like— help me?” Taehyung plead. “But i’m sick— “I told you I don’t care— “I don’t want you catch— His lips shut you up once again, kissing you more passionately. His tongue immediately entering your wet mouth when you gasped by the sudden impact. You stoped complaining and grabbed with both hands his soft black hair gently, soft moans leaving your mouth as his hips started giving pressure down on your clothed core. “I can count as a birthday present,” Taehyung whispers on your ear bitting down on your lobe, licking it afterward. “Right?” “Sure you can,” you moaned, a giggle leaving both of your mouths. “You’re all i ever wished for.” Taehyung pulled his face up in front of yours, his lips an inch away from yours, teasingly rubbing both together with a smirk on his. “I’m gonna make you feel so good.” He note. Sure he did.

JUNGKOOK

It was intense —addictive, and more deeper than you thought it would turn out like. His pinky lips were more intense than the sexual tension you felt 'round you both all day long in front of his members all morning of that day. His taste was more addicting than the savor of chocolate on those days you feel lonely and want nothing more than just drown yourself into a good movie and drink some good hot melted chocolate to make you forget the day. And his lips, the lips you’d kissed thousands of times before, the lips that now were kissing yours with such lovely movements —yet with such a possessive pase. His tongue was deeply moving inside your mouth, wet muscles fighting for dominance —where he obviously won, he always won. Jungkook loved you more that any girl on the world —besides his mother and his girls fans, clearly. Well, he told you once that you were like a fan for him, you were a VIP fan. You scoffed at his random words he blow at you on a random call he did once while you were working. You thought it would be something important, that’s why he was calling you at that rare hours —but looks like it was not. It was just him being the random bunny you loved so much. As much as he loved you back. “Wait— A whimper stoped your words half-sentences. Jungkook’s were sucking down on your neck, where probably would tomorrow appear a dark hickey. He hummed on your neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses down your chest. You were sat on his lap with both arms around his shoulders and fingers interlocked with his locks of hair, while his arms where on your sides and his hands on your ass where from time to time gave a strong squeeze that made you jump a bit. “Wait— Jungkook!” You tight your hands on his hair as an attentive sign for him to pull away. So he did, a worried expression on his face; afraid of the simple possibility for him to had hurt you somehow, someway. “Are you okay? Did i do so— Your sneeze froze him. And the move you made it did froze him even more, but to his growing member it made grow more hard. More in need to some release. When you sneezed you had an habit to move your body in any way possible, so you moved your hip forwards with one fast   thrust. This made him more turned on that he was before, the make out with you turned him on a bit, but this completely drove  him crazy. Without saying anything Jungkook grabbed you tightly by the waist and run out to your bedroom. You let out a surprise scream, with a soon turned giggles. The Jungkook turned on and needed was so funny to watch on, and the scenery was even more funny when the sight of you being carried by your strong boyfriend to your bedroom speedy, your lazy limbs not even grabbing at him to support, they were hanging down your body before being spread on the bed where your boyfriend just threw you on. “You’re gonna regret laughing,” he grunted on your mouth, bitting down on your lower lip, almost drawing blood out. “You think so?” You teased, crashing his hips to yours with a hard pull of your legs that were wrapped around his back. “I know so,” Jungkook declare, locking his mouth with yours on a fast and desperate kiss, the kiss that affirmed you that tomorrow you’ll not be able to walk for a hole day— or even more.

A/N: If you want some reactions of bts, please just ask, requests are open.

[raisingsupergirl]

Apple or AT&T—Who's More Evil?

Let me start out by saying that I get it. I really do. Companies have to make money. Successful companies with great products deserve to make money. Apple and AT&T? They both make wonderful products and provide top-notch services. The problem is, for some dumb reason, they both like making as much money as possible. And the easiest way for them to do that is to keep us, the consumers, buying their new crap. Convincing us that we need it and that there's no other alternative. So when a company gets that big, when they can leverage their power against the little people, what stops us from finally getting fed up, throwing our phones in the toilet, and going back to smoke signals? Well, to answer that, I need to tell you what brought on my recent frustrations (as if any specific examples need to be given)…

Problem 1: The Man With the Data Plan

My wife and I went on a cruise a few weeks ago. And like most Americans with 1st-world problems, we had to decide whether we wanted to 1) go a week without cell phone or internet access while we cruised across international waters…yeah, right, 2) buy an international data plan from AT&T, or 3) purchase access to our ship's Wi-Fi access. In the end, it looked like the Wi-Fi package would be the cheapest, so that's what we went with. My wife was careful to turn off all wireless data to all apps and services on her phone (I just kept my phone turned off all week. I would have thrown it in the ocean and never looked back if she'd have let me) as directed on the various FAQs she found, and she logged onto the ship's Wi-Fi without complication. Smooth sailing… or at least we thought so until we received our AT&T bill. Yup, you guessed it—$100 worth of charges for iMessages and calls.

Problem 2: Disposable Phones

My wife and I bought new iPhone 7s two years ago. It was a great time in our lives. I remember the occasion fondly because it was the same day that our sweet Avery (two years old at the time) dressed up in her yellow "Beauty" princess dress and took in her first movie theater experience with Mommy and Daddy. Well, fast-forward two years, and we just paid off those phones. And lo and behold, my wife updated her phone earlier this week and within 30 minutes…it stopped working. Not completely, just the microphone, which, contrary to this smart phone generation's beliefs, is kind of important. And there was "nothing" that could be done to fix it. Which meant, just when we were free from the clutches of our AT&T contract and iPhone debt, we were sucked back in. Sure, the wife would get her fancy new phone, but at what cost?

So off we went to the AT&T store. We spoke with our customer representative (Ayla, which is easy for me to remember because it's the name of a cavewoman character in my favorite video game of all time, but I digress…), and she was great. She upgraded our antiquated data plan, made sure we understood the new plan, showed us where things could be improved to fit our needs, let us know who to contact about the $100 charge on our AT&T bill, and put up with our two insane daughters while my wife got her new phone set up. All in all, it was a great experience, but it was one that should never have happened in the first place. Why? Because Apple is intentionally breaking their older iPhones (if two years is considered "old") so their customers will buy the newest model. If you're not aware of this practice (YES, it's real, and it's confirmed by Apple's corporate reps), read on. If you know about it, feel free to skip the next three paragraphs.

First, imagine a perfect product. Let's use a fish aquarium heater as an example. Its job is simple—heat water to a specific temperature so your tropical fishies don't freeze to death. A company could easily create a heater that would last for decades, but why in the world would they do that? Even if they charged double the price of typical heaters, they would still lose money because in those two decades' time, its customers would by three or four of those "disposable" heaters that crack or short out from routine use. So it just doesn't make financial sense for them to make a durable product when they could make one that works just long enough to keep the consumer coming back for more.

Now, take that principle to the tech world, and we have to look at things a little differently. For those of you old enough, you remember those first Nokia brick cellphones well. Why? Because they were indestructible, their batteries lasted forever, and they had service EVERYWHERE. They were perfect phones. Except, the most exciting game on them was Snake, and within a few years, the Blackberry (and all of it's thumb-injuring successors) had overshadowed the poor, reliable Nokia despite its inferior construction. In this way, the tech world kept consumers buying new products every year because the amazing technology advanced so rapidly. I mean, you'd be insane to use those boring old bricks that could only make calls and use T9 to text when there were newer phones out there that could take pictures and check electronic mail!

Then something happened. The technology started to stagnate. It kept improving, but not nearly as fast. All phones had cameras, internet access, and most importantly, apps. At that point, if a phone didn't break, it could be used forever while the user just downloaded whatever new apps that came out. Sure, the new apps would take up more space and demand stronger processors and whatnot, but a frugal user could make due for years and years. And that kind of return just didn't work for the tech companies. If they were ever going to be able to swim in a vault filled with gold coins a la Scrooge McDuck, they needed to find a way to keep selling new products that consumers had no real reason to buy. And so, they invented the "update." Oh yes, you NEED this update! It'll keep your phone safe. It'll keep it running smoothly with all those new apps. It'll keep it… updated. But we should mention that those updates will eventually fry your phone's "old" processor, forcing you to fork out a grand every couple of years.

I'm not going to pretend to be tech savvy enough to outline every reason for this (and that's not what this blog's about, anyway), but we've all been victims of the sudden battery death, random crashing, and in my wife's case, microphone failure that happens immediately after one of these "updates." And as I said, this practice is documented and admitted. For the big companies, it's essential to keep them afloat. Heaven forbid that they keep giving us actual reasons to buy new products. No, they've already perfected the smartphone, so instead of creating something new, they've found ways to keep selling us the same thing. It's brilliant, in an evil mastermind sort of way.

Okay, back to the story. My wife got her new phone. She was safe for the next couple of years (though it's just a matter of time before MY phone dies of update sickness…), so now it was time to take the fight to AT&T's retentions department and see about that $100 charge on our bill.

Round 1: I called 6-1-1 and I spoke with the level 1 boss, though I didn't catch her name… She told it to me, but I didn't catch it. She was polite the entire time. She explained how there were, in fact, charges on my bill and how those charges were because we'd used data and call services in international waters. I explained (politely) that we hadn't authorized these usages because we turned off all cellular data, etc. and only used Wi-Fi while out of the country, and that I didn't plan to pay these extra charges. 30 minutes later and she let me know that she was going to "send this case up," and I should get an email within 24 hours. "No," I said, again politely, "I think I'll just talk to someone now." Brief (ten minute) pause, then [insert name here] said, "One moment please."

Round 2: Level 2 boss's name was John, and his accent fit his name. He, just like Level 1 Boss, took a good while searching through the charges and getting back to me, but he also remained completely polite the entire time. He explained that the Wi-Fi packages on most cruise ships only cover international water usage, and our AT&T charges had come while we were docked in port in Haiti. Why? Because my wife's phone started using the Haitian towers (instead of the cruise line's Wi-Fi) without our approval. It made perfect sense whether it was true or not, but John went on to tell me that, while he may not be able to get ALL of the charges removed, he would do what he could because we were, "…long-time valued customers." His words, not mine. Five minutes later, John took me off of hold and told me that he obtained approval to take $75 off of the bill, so we would only have to pay $25. Truth be told, I had no intention of paying ANY of that bill, but my interaction with John was so pleasant (I didn't have to ask him to reduce the bill. I didn't have to bring up the fact that we were valued customers, or that we could take our business across the street to Crickett Wireless. He knew all of these things, and he that knew I knew them. And he got the job done, or close to it) that he'd gained my respect. I wasn't going to fight John over the remaining $25, even if it did take over an hour to get that $75 knocked off. Game over. Roll credits.

So here's the thing—I'm a huge skeptic. With everyone I worked with throughout this debacle, I know that there's a possibility that they were all just working off of a script. That they did exactly as they'd been trained, performing damage control and getting every cent possible out of a tough customer like me. After everything, it's possible that AT&T and Apple still won. But at least they played the game. At least these REAL people listened to me and answered my questions, and in the end, the interactions were extremely pleasant. Yes, I get that I'm a number to the companies, but I was a person to their employees. And they treated me with respect. And I did the same with them.

My title poses the question of who's more evil between AT&T and Apple. Unfortunately, I don't have the answer to that question, but in THIS case, as much as it hurts me to say it, the bigger evildoer is definitely Apple. Why? Well, in AT&T's case, their charges were legitimate. My wife incurred roaming charges in Haiti because of the cruise line's failure to explain how their services worked. And even if John straight up lied to me about that, his company still only wound up stealing $25 (and one hour) from me. Apple on the other hand… they're openly breaking their own phones so their loyal customers have to buy new ones. And those new phones cost a whole lot more than $25. Yes, our experience in the AT&T store was pleasant while buying that new Apple iPhone (thanks to Ayla), but it should have never come to that.

In the end, we're victims of our circumstances. We're brainwashed by brilliant marketing. We're forced into competition with our neighbors. And there's only one thing I can say as I finish up typing this scathing report on my Apple MacBook Air—Joke's on you, Satan, er, Apple. Money's not real. No one really owns anything anymore. There's no privacy. No Freedom. The only things we have are our experiences, our interactions, and our attitudes. And as the days get longer and the grass gets greener, I can't help hoping Y2K is just running fashionably late (all you millennials should Google Y2K along with The Matrix and Surge soda. There's so much you've missed…). In the meantime, I'm going to go cut my grass with a lawnmower that's older than every piece of technology I own, and believe it or not, it's never had a single update. What a world.