#can it stop trying to game end me for 5 minutes?
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ough I've been wanting to work on fics again but my body is being particularly shitty this year since I had covid and I just don't have the energy
#personal shit#on the plus side the lower adderall dose doesn't seem to have given my psychosis so far#buuuuut they also stopped making the bc I was on to manage my pcos and endometriosis...#and anything else I've been trying has been making me horrendously sick in every conceivable way#i am... ludicrously sensitive to medication man. its unreal actually how even a slight change can fuck me up.#maybe they'll finally just yeet my uterus into the trash where it belongs and solve the problem permanently#though the prospect of surgery does not thrill me honestly. I have already had my insides finagled with before#and i would prefer to avoid doing it again. but if its the only solution then... so be it.#cant really leave this shit unchecked thats kind of a huge cancer liability if i do that and I do not want cancer.#why is my body like this#can it stop trying to game end me for 5 minutes?
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help I just wanna play splatoon but I have to revise :(
#I started playing it again this week and it’s so much more fun than I remember#I’m having a great time#I got up early today!! but I was then falling asleep trying to watch my lecture#and I have another to do (last one!!) but I. stopped working at 12 to ‘have lunch’#actually seeing it’s the last one is a very good motivator and I only have like 40 minutes of it left#i can do 40 minutes easy and then start writing it up that’s not bad at all#if I say I’ll go until 6 for now just to have an end point so I’m not trapped in The Endless I’ll be fine#but goddamn people keep texting me (if you can read this it’s not about you ily) and I. would like to not deal with them specifically rn#aaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA okay fuck that will deal with that later it will have consequences but it’s fine#I have to wash up too >:(#it’s just a plate but still#okay fine. I will. go wash up. and then lecture. by which time probably around 5:20#and I can spend ~40 minutes writing out the basics of the two lectures I watched today that’s manageable I can do that#and it would put me a significant step forward which I need rn#and if I can do that okay for just 1.5 hours. I can have some time before i eat to play the silly squid game <3#luke.txt
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Error 404: (Self-Aware!AU, Sylus Edition) – Pt. 8
Summary: A LADS self-aware!AU featuring Sylus and a player. That’s it, that’s the plot. Tags: player!reader x sylus, fem!reader x sylus, reader x lads, self-aware!au, strong language, suggestive themes, again with the slight smut phew, angst on top of more angst, no comfort... yet (or ever? hmm much to ponder about) A/N: Imagine if I leave it here lmao Also, I've been listening to White Ferrari on repeat while editing this chapter. I'm not saying that you should too while you're reading, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Oh, and Angel by Massive Attack. Trust me, it's gonna come up. (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵)
Pt. 1 - Pt. 2 - Pt. 3 - Pt. 4 - Pt. 5 - Pt. 6 - Pt. 7 - Pt. 8 - Pt. 9 - Pt. 10
The cold tiles of the bathroom floor wreak a shiver through your body.
You’re curled up in front of the toilet, barely upright after another round of puking what little bile is left in your stomach. Cold beads of sweat dot your forehead and every breath feels thin, ragged, like you’re trying to gulp air through a pinhole. The chill seeps under your skin, leaving you shuddering involuntarily between dry heaves.
You make the rookie mistake of tilting your head ever-so-slightly to rest against the cool porcelain, and the miniscule action threatens to send the room careening into another violent spin. A wave of nausea hits you and you desperately gnaw on your bottom lip to prevent yourself from gagging.
You feel like absolute shit.
There’s something lodged inside, sinking deep into the pit of your stomach. A poison, a corruption—heavier than the excess of alcohol still clawing its way through your system. It isn’t the simple penance for overindulging, no; it’s darker, rawer, less perfunctory than the remnants of last night’s events.
It churns inside you, leaving an acrid, metallic taste on your tongue and a dull ache behind your eyes.
The buzzing of your phone reverberates beside you, a relentless vibration against your thigh. It hasn’t stopped since the moment you clawed your way out of bed and staggered toward your porcelain waste bucket. You weren’t supposed to bring it along with you—it should’ve been left abandoned outside of this room, far from this bleak sanctuary. This… this disgusting aftermath of your revelry.
Unfortunately, it’s practically an extension of you now. A limb, almost. Or worse, a crutch—something you lean on so habitually, that the mere thought of its absence feels like an amputation.
“S-sorry,” you release a shaky breath, tears pricking your vision, unbidden. Unwelcome. “Sorry.”
Another vibration. You can picture it clearly in your head: the worry marring his face, the exasperation in his eyes.
You retch.
––––
The red takeout box from Panda Express sits in front of you, its contents lukewarm and forgotten for the better part of the hour. You barely remember ordering it—actually, now that you think about it… Did you even order it yourself? Your memory’s a little hazy, just like everything else today. And last night.
Sylus’ voice crackles through your phone, propped precariously against a half-empty mug of tea on the low table.
His presence, as always, manages to fill the room, though this time there’s a palpable tension in the air since you opened the game. His initial greeting had all the warmth of a parent catching their kid sneaking in past curfew. The moment his image blinked into view, you could see the battle in his eyes.
On one end, he simmered with ire, almost ready to boil over. On the other, he looked like he’d gladly claw his way out the screen just to tuck you into bed and personally force-feed you the food you’ve been ignoring for the past forty minutes.
“Eat it,” he grouses, a hint of steel sharpening his deceptively calm tone. The worry beneath it feels like it could strangle you.
(And if it could, it probably would—if he has any say in it.)
You whine, burrowing deeper under the blanket, folding yourself into a sad, uncooperative ball on the couch. “I will. Eventually.”
“Eventually?” he echoes, the incredulity clear in his voice. “Do you plan on eating it soon as it becomes inedible, or is this a test of endurance?”
With a sigh that feels like it’s pulled from the depths of your soul, you poke halfheartedly at the lid. The smell of grease and fried food wafts out, making your stomach churn. Whether it’s from nausea or hunger pangs, you can’t tell.
“It smells like regret,” you mutter, swallowing the lump rising from your esophagus.
Sylus snorts, and you can tell it slipped out before he could stop it. “Considering the state you’re in? Can’t say I’m surprised. But you still need to eat, kitten. You can’t run on stubbornness alone.”
“I’m doing fine so far,” you argue weakly, knowing you’re not convincing anyone. Your body feels like it’s been put through the wringer—limbs heavy, muscles crying in protest, a pounding headache that refuses to let up.
“Fine,” he repeats, dry as ash. “You can barely hold yourself up, but sure, let’s call that fine.”
You finally flip the box open, revealing a mess of something fried and vaguely brown. The smell hits you harder this time, and you salivate something odd. “I don’t think—”
“Eat,” he cuts you off, voice firm, brooking no argument. “You’ve done well with the tea, but now you need something to fill you up.”
“I can think of something else I’d like to fill me up,” you mumble, the words slipping out before you can stop yourself.
A beat of silence, and then Sylus’ tone shifts—a touch amused now, but it’s edged with a deliberate weight that makes your skin prickle. Uh-oh.
“Sweetie,” he says slowly, almost indulgent, “if you’ve got the energy to make jokes like that, you’ve got the energy to eat. Be good, and I’ll make sure you’re properly rewarded once you’re feeling better.”
You laugh, breathless, trying to mask your nervousness from the subtle innuendo. Obediently, you pick up the plastic spork beside the carton. “You’re really selling this hard, huh.”
“I’m not here to sell it,” he sighs, voice losing its edge, but there’s still a firmness to it. “I’m here to make sure you don’t pass out. One bite. Start there.”
You spear a piece of shrimp hesitantly. It looks harmless enough, but you lift it like it might bite back.
You take the tiniest nibble.
It’s greasy, salty, and absolutely meh—but it doesn’t immediately trigger your gag reflex, which in itself feels like a small victory.
“There,” he says, his satisfaction palpable. “See? You survived.”
“Barely,” you shoot back half-heartedly, though the corner of your mouth twitches.
“I’ll make sure to congratulate you later for your heroic recovery,” he says wryly. “Now another bite, sweetheart.”
You make a reluctant noise but comply, munching slowly. He hums in approval. When you glance at the screen, his expression has mellowed—the severity giving way to something almost tender.
You look away quickly, swallowing hard; though you're not sure if it’s because of the tiny morsel of food or from the heavier something that's lodged in your throat.
The sound of your chewing is slightly amplified by the silence that comes after. You’re afraid to break it first.
So Sylus does it for you. Once he’s decided you’ve had your fill of the fried rice.
“Would you like to talk about last night?”
You bite the inside of your cheek. “What about last night?”
A long pause.
“We don’t have to,” he says quietly. “I’m just saying that if you want to, you’ve nothing to worry about.”
The sincerity in his voice makes your chest tighten. You press your lips together, unsure of how to answer. There’s discomfort; the unease brought by your own self-consciousness.
“I—uh—” You start, fumbling for the right words. “I didn’t mean to… make things weird or anything. I don't usually get that wasted,” You sigh, blowing a stray hair out of your face. “I’m sorry you had to see me like that.”
“The only thing you did wrong last night was ignore my messages,” Sylus murmurs, his tone a little admonishing. “Making me worry about your well-being.”
You glance up, catching the affection in his eyes. He gives you a slight smile, relieved to finally have your attention fully on him.
You scrunch the blanket in your fist, fiddling with a loose string. You want to say something. Anything. But you can’t seem to summon the courage.
Finally—
“You don’t think…” you hesitate, voice small. “You don’t think it’s– that I’m… too much trouble?”
He tuts softly, the sound playful, with hints of something fond. Comforting, almost. So you hold his gaze, even if it’s a little harder than you’d like it to be.
Sylus looks at you with something so… endearing that it’s almost painful. “You’re perfect. My little troublemaker,” his eyes burn a little brighter. “Mine.”
The words hit you like a wave—soothing, gratifying. Staggering.
Oh, you want to believe him. You want to lose yourself in his words, to give in to the feeling of being cherished, of being seen. You don’t think you’ve wanted anything as much as this.
But turmoil wages a war inside you, and you’re stuck between the pull to let yourself believe and the sharp reality of your situation.
The futility of it all.
It makes you hurt, deep inside, in a way you don’t know how to fix.
––––
The package you got from the lobby is nondescript. Unassuming. The kind of box that could contain anything from kitchenware to – you don’t know, maybe a desk lamp? You turn it over in your hands, squinting at the lack of clues of its content and its sender.
Did you order something and forgot?
Payroll was over a week ago, and you’re aware of your irresponsible tendency to pile everything that catches your eye onto an online shopping cart just to tempt yourself into buying shit you don’t need, but you’re pretty sure you’d remember spending money on… whatever this is.
It’s not until you’re back in the privacy of your apartment, scissors in hand, that the mystery begins—and promptly ends.
The contents spill out, leaving you to blink owlishly at the mess of shredded wrapping paper and its pièce de résistance: a nine-inch monstrosity of a dildo, hot red in color.
The… thing is practically a weapon, its twisting ridges and intimidating girth looking more like something you’d need a user manual for. Or a fucking exorcist, you distantly think in rising panic.
“Uhh…” The sound tumbles out, an embarrassing mix of confused and gobsmacked. “I don’t remember—?”
Ping!
Your phone chimes before you can finish, and you slowly turn your gaze towards the screen, a sinking feeling beginning to form in your gut.
The message is short. And oh-so-smug.
Ah. Just in time.
The realization dawns on you, and your cheeks burn hot enough to fry an egg. “Sylus!”
What? Even in text, his tone carries that infuriating slyness you can practically hear from a mile away. You’ve earned it.
Your mouth works uselessly for a moment before words could spill out, clumsy and agitated. “Earned what?!”
A little treat for being such an obedient little thing while you were recovering, remember?
“Holy shit,” you wheeze. A half-hysterical giggle bubbles up your throat as you hold the draconic cock far from you as if it’s gonna attack at any second. Fuck, it might. “This is almost as big as my forearm! The hell am I supposed to do with this?”
What do I expect you to do with it? Sylus’s reply comes almost instantly, the weight of his insinuation almost coming across as mocking. I thought that was obvious.
You didn’t think your face could go any redder, and you’re sure you resemble a fucking tomato right at that moment. “Sy-Sy, this is—” You gulp, glancing at the toy with wide eyes. “fucking massive. It–it has… it’s got scales!”
Ah, so you’ve noticed the craftsmanship. Quite exquisite, isn’t it?
“E-Exquisite?” you sputter, voice soaring at a higher octave. “This looks like it came out of Alien or something! I’m pretty sure it’s gonna start moving on its own…”
Only if you press a button.
Your brain short-circuits, and you frantically examine the thing for telltale signs of any hidden mechanization.
There’s a short lull, laden with barely restrained amusement. Then: Relax, sweetheart. It’s not going to bite.
You let out another – nervous – laugh, gingerly setting the large toy down as if it might explode from its sheer audacity. “I hate you.”
No, you don’t, Sylus counters without missing a beat. But I do appreciate how flustered you’re getting. Go on, sweet thing—tell me how it’s too much for you. I could listen to that all night.
You let out a strangled noise, burying your face in your hands. “You’d love that, wouldn’t you.”
Mmh, you know me so well.
You sigh, the gravity of what’s inevitable setting in. It was like fighting a losing battle.
Something the both of you knew right from the start.
-
-
-
(You are my angel)
“I-It hurts to put in,” you whimper, body trembling as sweat clings to your flushed skin. Every muscle feels taut, coiled tight with both anticipation and a flicker of fear. “p-please…”
“We have the rest of the night, little dove. We’ll take it slow,” Sylus whispers, his voice a velvet caress in your ear, warm and grounding. “I’m right here.”
His words melt into you like cloying liquid, wrapping around your resolve like a sensual embrace.
(Come from way above)
“Again.”
“I-I can’t,” you sniffle, the words breaking into short, shaky gasps as your chest heaves. The remnants of your last orgasm still ripple through you, the one he’s ripped from you mercilessly.
“You can, poppet,” he coos, the endearment sliding over you like cool mercury. “Give me one more, yeah? Want to see those pretty eyes rolling for me.”
The thought alone has you shivering, his tone dripping with enough heat to stir something molten from within you.
(To bring me love)
The air hangs unbearably hot, almost suffocating. Every nerve sings, alive with the memory of his ministrations—though he’s never truly touched you, has he?
It doesn’t matter. The line between what’s real and what’s not blurs further with every passing moment.
Your body burns, and yet you crave more, more—the pulsing ache of your stretched walls only feeding the gnawing hunger that builds inside, like an unrestrained beast.
You blink sluggishly; your vision swimming as pleasure courses through you in heavy, dizzying surges.
Has he bewitched you? You’ve become insatiable, ravenous—monstrous in your desire. For him. For the addicting high only he could give, and teasingly dangle just out of reach.
It’s too much. It’s not enough.
How…? He’s nothing but a voice, incorporeal, yet he commands you completely. Your hands, your movements, your very breath feels as if it belongs to him. They follow his instructions without hesitation, carving paths of fire and electricity across the bare expanse of your skin.
“More?” Sylus rasps, and the edge in his voice sends a thrill down your spine. There’s something feral in his tone, and it brings you an almost animalistic sense of glee to know that he isn’t unaffected by all of this any less than you are.
“More,” you beg, raw and needy. He groans in response.
“Good, so good for me,” he hisses a litany of praise that sounds so much like a curse. “My good girl. Mine to break, mine to ruin.”
Your back arches as you cry out; muscles locking, mouth falling open in a soundless scream as both agony and ecstasy crash over you like a tidal wave.
(Love you, love you, love you, love you Love you, lo–ve you, love you, love you … Love you, love you—love you, love you…)
––––
"My cousin's getting married tomorrow."
You say it with an air of nonchalance, your voice light, as if you’re just commenting on the weather.
Sylus doesn’t respond right away. His usual quick wit is conspicuously absent, replaced by a silence that stretches long, settling into the room like a beam of sunlight from your window. The continuous whirr of the electric fan and the droning of the news anchor on TV fill the space instead, in place of conversation.
You don’t force it. Instead, you wait patiently until it bends under its own weight and breaks.
After what feels like minutes, his voice cuts through the quiet; neutral and impassive. "Where's it happening?"
"A little chapel in Downtown Orlando, near Lake Lucerne. Nothing fancy. They’re keeping it small."
He nods, his gaze distant. Somewhere you can’t follow. "Just close family?"
"Yeah," you murmur, your fingers absently tugging at the fraying hem of your cardigan. "And a few friends. My mom’s going, along with her new husband. They sent me photos of the setup earlier—it’s pretty."
Sylus hums. “Would you have gone, if it weren’t so far away?”
“Yeah,” you answer automatically. “Yeah, ‘course. But I’m here, and they’re there. So I could only send my regards.”
Maru pads into the room, brushing against your leg before bumping his head insistently against your shin. You scoop him up, ignoring his soft meows of protest, and cradle him in your lap.
“She’s been planning it for months,” you continue, scratching behind soft cat ears. “Way before she got engaged. She’s one of those people who just… knows. Knows what she wants, knows how to get there. All mapped out, down to the finer details.”
In the corner of your eye, you see a faint smile ghosting his lips. It doesn’t reach his eyes. "What a luxury,” he remarks, almost wistfully. "To pave your life so easily, just like that."
There’s something unspoken behind his words, something heavier than a passing comment.
"Do you think about it?" His question startles you—not just its suddenness but the way his gaze locks onto yours, intent and searching, like he’s trying to read the answer in your face before you could even utter a word.
You blink. "... About what?"
"Marriage."
You hesitate. The question feels delicate, like a soap bubble floating in the air, fragile enough to burst at the slightest touch. "Sometimes," you admit. "But not like she does. It's always been more of an abstract idea, I guess."
He doesn’t speak.
"I don’t know," you say softly, “if it’s something I could ever want. Or if it’s even meant for me."
Your voice falters, and the rest is left unsaid, though it lingers between the spaces untouched.
I don’t think about it, no. Not if… if it’s not with—
You stop yourself before the thought takes flight, tampering it back down.
Sylus leans back, his gaze flickering away. "It’s a commitment," he says eventually. "One that requires a lot of thought. I understand."
He doesn’t elaborate, and for a moment, you almost consider leaving it there. But something in you—persistent, prying—urges you to press just a little further.
"What about you? Have you thought about it?"
There’s an imperceptible shift in his expression; the faintest furrow between his brows, a shadow of uncertainty crossing his features.
"Perhaps not in the way you're thinking," he says quietly, almost to himself. "Sometimes I wonder what it means. For someone like me." He hesitates, glancing at you, an uncharacteristic vulnerability in those deep pools of red. “For…”
His words hang unfinished; you feel its hollowness pushing down on you, as though they bore meaning neither of you can bring yourself to name.
You feel it settle in your chest, vacant and aching, like an absence of something. Gone before it even began.
––––
It dawns on you on a regular Saturday evening, as you're (clumsily) peeling potatoes for dinner, and Sylus is dutifully recounting the events of his day to you like your very own talk show host on late night cable.
It creeps up at you—not in an explosive burst of clarity, no. No fanfare, no earth-shattering epiphany. It’s quieter than that, like the tides under the moon, rising unnoticed until you’re already ankle-deep.
Maybe it’s always been there, tucked into the corners of your mind, hidden in the spaces between the teasing banter and the way he watches you when he thinks you’re unaware. A whisper that you refused to acknowledge, too afraid of what it would bring.
You must have known, even then. Right from the start.
From the way it feels when he says your name—softly, reverently, like it’s a privilege to utter it so freely.
From the way you ache when he waits for you to finish a thought, as though every word you speak is something worth treasuring.
And it’s in the way he knows you better than you understand yourself, filling your silences with meaning so you don’t have to.
You love him.
You know how this ends.
––––
Coming down from a mind-numbing high is always an experience, a short state of nirvana; this time no different from the rest.
For a fleeting moment, everything feels infinite—a small eternity suspended in pleasure. Petite mort.
But then reality hits you once again, and the pleasure vanishes like smoke.
It leaves you feeling utterly spent. Empty. The silence crashes back in like a tsunami, heavier than before. The stillness wraps around you like a suffocating shroud.
The sound of your shallow breathing, the oppressive white noise, the distant hum of the city from outside your window… These are your only source of life. There’s no warm touch to ground you. No arms to pull you close. No sweet nothings to piece you back together. Just this. Just you.
You had known. You always knew.
This was it—the price of wanting something you were never meant to have. For surrendering yourself to something that exists only in fragments and pixels, bound by lines of code and a screen you can’t cross. You delude yourself into thinking it’s worth it, that these fleeting moments of bliss outweigh the quiet wake of devastation it leaves behind, every time.
And yet—
A choked sob breaks past your lips, shattering the silence. It tears out of you like something primal, something you can’t control.
Your body folds in on itself, naked and trembling, your arms banding across your stomach like you’re trying to hold something broken together. The sheets beneath you feel clammy, disgusting, but you pull them tighter anyway, desperate for something to hold on to.
It hurts all the same.
“Talk to me,” Sylus whispers urgently. There’s something jagged and desperate about it. “Please. Tell me how to make it better.”
How could you?
What words could bridge this chasm between you? How do you explain a hurt so uniquely yours, so tied to the fragile intricacies of a body he doesn’t have, of feelings that leads to nowhere?
How do you describe the way it breaks you, knowing that he’s oh-so close, yet still—yet always—out of reach?
How do you describe the weight of being too human in moments like this?
You press your forehead to your knees, heart in your throat. You don’t know how to make him understand.
“I can’t,” you whisper into your knees, voice cracking under the weight of what’s left unsaid.
-
-
-
The next morning arrives with the muted glow of daylight filtering through the blinds, but it does nothing to lift the oppressive tension in the room. You don’t mention last night. You don’t even glance at the lit phone screen.
Sylus doesn’t bring it up either—not directly. But you feel him. The weight of his attention clings to the edges of the silence you’ve imposed, like static crackling just beneath the surface.
You keep moving. It doesn’t matter how; you make yourself busy. Work has never been more engrossing as it does at that very moment, and you hurl yourself into the thrilling world of emails, spreadsheets, and Teams meetings like you’re vying for the spot as best employee of the month.
His impatience is impossible to ignore. It presses against you, insistent, like a gasp of breath waiting to be released. But you don’t give him the chance.
At some point, his voice drifts from the speakers, low and clipped, but careful; as if he’s reigning in his emotions, afraid to scare you further away.
“Are you going to talk to me?”
Your fingers hover the keyboard. For a moment, the mouse cursor taunts you, as if it's also impatiently waiting for an answer.
Sylus thinks the silence you leave him suspended in is deliberate, even cruel.
He doesn’t push, not immediately. You hear the faint noise of the game’s background music, the tinkling piano keys, a reminder of his presence.
When he speaks again, his tone is softer, laced with something almost… pleading. The change in his tone doesn’t ease the tension; it makes it worse.
“I can’t help if you shut me out, my heart.”
Still, you offer nothing.
The air feels brittle, stretched too thin, like glass just before it shatters. You can almost hear the first cracks forming, spidering between the two of you.
He doesn’t speak again.
The day drags on in an uneasy rhythm. You move through the hours like a ghost, and Sylus remains silent. But the quietness pulses with disconcertment; a build up without release. The quiet isn’t peaceful. It’s the kind that crackles like a frayed wire. It collides with your refusal to confront it.
And so it goes: you avoid, he waits, and the distance between you grows.
––––
You’re at a crosswalk on the 4-A highway intersection, surrounded by a sea of pedestrians, the incessant hum of the metropolis vibrating beneath your feet as if the very ground you walk on is alive.
The moment your gaze lands on a couple just ahead of you, everything seems to quiet down, like a fuzzy FM radio station on mute. You see them, caught in their own little world, oblivious to the noise and rush of the city.
The woman’s laughter is light—happy. Her hand in his, secure and relaxed. The way she looks at him… it’s familiar, almost. Something you recognize.
The man beside her moves with a subtle grace. His presence is undeniable, but it’s the way he watches her, something soft and devout in his gaze, that draws you in. He’s tall, his sharp features and posture elegant—and somehow, it fits perfectly beside the smaller figure pulling him effortlessly against the throng of people.
Without warning, the unnamed man’s features shift into something more distinct, and the woman turns into the reflection you see every day in the mirror.
It’s not the couple before you that you see anymore—it’s you, against Sylus’ chest, his silvery-white hair stark against the dark fabric of his clothes. You imagine his red eyes, those sharp features, the quiet strength of his presence wrapping around you, like it’s where you belong.
You're lost in the fantasy—the way it could be, if the two of you existed in the same world, side by side. His hand around your waist, the shared intimacy, the profound joy. Just the two of you against all odds.
A smile starts to tug at the corners of your lips, but before it can fully settle, the harsh blare of a car horn shatters the illusion.
The world rushes back around you. A teen bumps into your shoulder, pushing you forward. The vision of them—of him—dissolves, leaving you in the busy street, once again just another face in the crowd.
––––
Everything falls apart one afternoon.
You confront Sylus, words spilling out before you can stop them. You don’t know what drives you—bravery, desperation, or maybe the crushing weight of hopelessness that has finally stripped you of your fear.
“How’s she?”
His brows furrow. “Who?” He looks genuinely thrown, and for a second, you wish you could take the words back.
When you finally say her name, his expression shifts. It’s quick—a flicker of something you couldn’t catch before he schools his features again.
“Why do you ask?” There’s an undercurrent to his voice now, his tone wary, eyes searching yours. “I try to avoid any interactions with her if it’s not needed.”
He pauses; then his gaze softens, though there’s still a guardedness to it. “Are you… worried?”
You shake your head, frustrated with yourself, with him, with all of it. “It’s not—It’s not that.” You don’t know how to put it into words.
How can you explain the knot in your chest? The envy—not for reasons he thinks… or maybe for exactly those reasons. Maybe he knows. Maybe that’s why he’s looking at you like that, imploring and cautious at the same time.
“You have her,” you finally say, and the words fall flat, bitter on your tongue.
Sylus’ eyes flash, sharp and unyielding. “And you and I both know who I’d rather have.”
Now, isn’t that the crux of it all?
Your throat closes up, a hard lump that you can’t swallow down. “I don’t know how you could,” you manage, though it rings hollow in the dead air.
“Don’t.” His voice is harsh now, rougher than you’re used to. Frustration bleeds through his usual composure. “Don’t act like you don’t feel it.”
You bite your lip, your gaze darting away. He calls your name, and there’s something raw in the way he says it, like it costs him something just to say aloud.
You choke out a laugh that sounds more of a sob than anything. “I don’t know where to go from here. It was fun at first, but now… It’s just sad.”
He frowns, and for a moment, there’s a boyishness to the expression, an innocence to his vulnerability. It stirs something deep in your chest.
He opens his mouth, no doubt ready to ask why—why now, why this? Why are you unraveling in front of him, like this?
But you don’t give him the chance.
“I love you, Sylus.” You admit, barely above a whisper. The words fall heavy between you, a confession and a wound all at once.
Sylus stills.
The silence fills the room, but his eyes—those soft crimson—speak volumes. His jaw tightens, hands clench into fists, but there’s no real surprise in his face. He’s always known.
“I know,” he tells you.
There’s something ancient in the timbre of his voice, like it’s been torn from the deepest part of him. And for a moment, neither of you moves.
_
He feels it—the way you’re slipping through his fingers. Every word you say feels like a step away, less of a standstill, more a surrender, and he… he’s never felt more powerless than he does in this moment.
(And isn’t that just grand? You’ve always had this uncanny ability to make him feel things he’s never felt before. He just wishes it wasn’t like this—wishes it wasn’t slipping into something he can’t hold onto.)
He doesn’t know what to say or do, doesn’t know what could possibly alter the trajectory you’re both hurtling towards. But the thought of losing this, of losing you, is unimaginable.
“I love you,” he says, rough and uneven, like the admission physically hurts. “In ways that terrify me. Do you understand?”
Your eyes widen, and he sees it—the flicker of hope. Fragile and fleeting, but there. Your gazes lock, and the world stops.
For a moment, there’s no sound, no movement—just the two of you standing on the edge of something vast and terrifying.
“I want—” His voice cracks, infinitesimally, but it echoes in the void between you. “I want to hold you. To wake up next to you. To touch you in all the ways that matter, not just in words and binary. I want to be what you need.”
You know what’s coming.
“But—”
The word lingers.
“But you can’t,” you whisper, finishing what he couldn’t.
Sylus looks at you, his red eyes burning with an intensity that feels heartbreakingly human.
You’ve reached another impasse, and it feels like the final one. The air between you is thick with words unspoken, promises that can’t be made. It’s not anger that lingers, nor is it blame. It’s something quieter. More agonizing.
A resignation.
And yet, even in this fragile moment, a piece of you—of both of you—refuses to let go. To what could be, to what never will.
––––
Your mom’s voice rings bright through Facetime, a faint blur of words as she gives you the rundown of the events from your cousin’s wedding. The dress (An elegant Oscar de la Renta boat neck), the cake (A three-tier red velvet, a little on the sweeter side), and the vows (“Oh, you would’ve cried, honey!”).
You try to listen, but your attention keeps drifting away. She notices, of course.
“You seem more preoccupied lately, dear. Boy troubles?”
It’s a simple question, but it lands differently. Her voice is too light, too casual, like she’s asking if you’re still eating your vegetables.
She doesn’t seem to acknowledge how far the distance has grown between you, how many years have passed where you stopped expecting her to understand. You’ve wanted her to notice, to see the parts of you she never asked about. The changes in you, whether small or monumental. But she never did. And you stopped waiting.
You chuckle tiredly.
“Yeah, mom. Boy troubles.”
Tagging: @xxfaithlynxx @beewilko @browneyedgirl22 @yournextdoorhousewitch @sunsethw4 @stxrrielle @mangooes @hrts4hanniehae @buggs-1 @michiluvddr @ssetsuka @imm0rtalbutterfly @the-golden-jhope @beomluvrr @milkandstarlight @bookfreakk @ally-the-artistic-turtle @sapphic-daze @sarahthemage @cchiiwinkle @madam8 @slownoise @raendarkfaerie @sylusdarling @luminaaaz @greeenbeean @vvhira @issamomma @shroomiethefrogwhisperer @blueberrysquire @lovely-hani @fiyori @peachystea @slyfoxtsu @tinyweebsstuff @i2sannie @aeanya @sylus-crow @queen-serena88 @xthefuckerysquaredx @rayvensblog @poptrim
#love and deepspace#lads#lnds#love and deepspace sylus#lads sylus#lnds sylus#sylus x reader#sylus x you#lads x you#lads x reader#love and deepspace fic#self aware au#sylus qin
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LOVE ANTHEM, 或 𓈒𓈒 cuddling with them.
( 𝒷 ) INTRODUC𝓲NG 𖥔 엔하이픈 ୨୧ f .. r 7OO fluff established relationship cautions ˚ non-idol au kissing skinship
jiah says : it has been a while since i last wrote headcanons huehue ㅠㅠ hope you enjoy 🪽
( ˊᗜˋreblogs&feedbacks · C𝑙𝑖CK )
HEESEUNG
would smoothly slide his hand in yours when you passe by— eyes still focused on the game he is playing. would then tug closer to him, gently and slowly, before resting his hand on your waist and making sit on his lap.
would wrap his arms around your form, stroking your thigh gently, fingertips brushing on your skin as his free hand’s fingers dance on the keyboard. and when he wins; would hug you tight while relaxing on his chair with a proud smile, even turning around with his chair.
him : “i deserve some reward for my hard work, right?” you : “of course, baby”
JONGSEONG
after landing a playful slap on your butt—to which you would yelp—whereupon he sees you laying on your stomach, would come lay on top of you instead of the mattress. ignoring your pleading for air, would rest his whole weight on you.
would at some point start landing wet kisses on your cheeks, sliding next to you so he can have a better angle and can free you from your agony. would then pull you in his embrace, still kissing your cheeks repeatedly.
him : “i want to eat your cheeks” you : “please don’t, i kinda need that”
JAEYUN
would already be following you around the house for a while. with his starry eyes and kicked puppy expression staring right at your back while you do the most random things ever. telepathically asking you for some cuddles.
his face would enlighten when you finally give him some attention. would open his arms for you to hide in and would sinm his nose in the crook of your neck— smelling your comforting scent. an embrace that will eventually end into long cuddles.
you : “jake, i need to pee” him : “just 5 more minutes, please”
SUNGHOON
would look for comfort in your arms after a long day away from you. it would be heard in the way he sighs in relief as soon as he steps foot in your house, his hurried steps approaching to the bedroom you would be laying in.
would love to be on top of you, his head resting on your chest while your fingers wrap around his hair strands. his hand would often take yours and put your hand palm on his cheek, then would turn his head to kiss it— all over.
him : “i missed you so much” you : “you are such a big baby”
SUNOO
would be really good at making you feel like you are the one who wants to cuddle— when you are, in theory, not. would know that if he stays next to you long enough, shoulder brushing yours but not really, you would soon ache for his touch and end up pressed against him.
would have such a cute smile on his face whenever you cuddle with him. would hold you on top of him as if you were an immense plushie with his arms squeezing your waist tightly while your face is in his neck.
you : “you could just ask instead of putting up a whole act” him : “where is the fun in that?”
JUNGWON
would have no shame or restraint in literally jumping on you the second he sees you lying somewhere without him. his laugh would resonate in the whole room when you let out a loud ‘oof’ and try to push him off of you. putting up a fight for anything with him would become a habit.
would love to tease you whenever you are locked in each other’s embrace: tickling you or pinching your sides when he feels like it— you would not even react at some point. but, would also calm down when you rub his back gently, purring like a cat.
you : “jungwon, i will kick you if you don’t stop” him : “you love me too much to do that”
RIKI
would prefer to cuddle during bedtime, when you are both on the verge of drifting to the dream world and your eyes are too heavy to stay open— when he doesn’t have to verbally ask. his shyness would wear off as soon as the tiredness would show it’s nose.
gently pulling the cover over both of your bodies, would scoot closer and put a single arm around you. then, would pull you close to him, to his chest, to his heart. like a real koala, would cling into you like that during the whole night— even if you end up in the weirdest positions, he would be holding you.
him : “wh’ d’you hate me?” you : “i just need some water”
💌 taglist ─── open, mwah ♡
#⠀𝑓 ⟡⠀命运’𝑠 ⠀#k flixnet#k films#enhypen#enhypen x reader#enhypen fluff#enhypen drabbles#enhypen imagines#enhypen scenarios#enhypen reactions#enhypen soft hours#enhypen soft thoughts#enha x reader#enha fluff#enha drabble#enha imagines#enha scenarios#enha reactions#enha soft hours#enha soft thoughts#heeseung x reader#jay x reader#jongseong x reader#jake x reader#jaeyun x reader#sunghoon x reader#sunoo x reader#jungwon x reader#niki x reader#riki x reader
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REVENGE
thanos x fem!reader (smut)
warnings: kind of noncon so read at your own risk
you were minding your own business, sitting at your bunk, eating the shitty meal you were given when you heard some yelling.
you turned your head to where the noises were coming from only to see your brother myung gi, who you didn’t even know was here until now, getting beaten up. instinctively, you storm over to stop them.
"not thinking of interfering, are you?"
the purple haired man asked as he tilted his head, his eyes widened sadistically.
you threw a punch in his face without even considering for a second, landing right on his nose, making him loose his balance and stumble back.
in an instant, he lunged at you. he gritted his teeth as blood ran down his nose, his eyes filled with a deadly rage. grabbing you by the collar and pinning you to the wall. "you think you can just hit me like that? huh!? you've got a lot of guts for someone so small." he spat, eyes narrowed as he glared at you.
some other players had turned their attention to the sight of the commotion, some had ceased their betting and others watched with intrigue and anticipation as they witnessed what would unfold.
player 001 stepped in, putting a swift end to the conflict before thanos could hurt you. he took it upon himself to discipline thanos and his friend by delivering a thorough beating, leaving both of them bruised and battered.
thanos stayed put on the ground, coughing and panting from exhaustion, his nose still stinging from your punch and the beating he just received.
“you’re gonna pay for this, you bitch!” he yelled after you between coughs when you and your brother headed to the bathroom to clean up.
he still had enough spunk left in him to send a threat your way even after his beating.
he was determined to get revenge.
after cleaning the blood of your brothers face and a small skirmish between the two of you for joining this game you heard that lights were out in 5 minutes so you head back to the dorm.
you could feel thanos’ eyes on you as you got ready for bed.
as the minutes ticked by, the lights slowly dimmed, signaling that it could only mean one thing - it was time to sleep. the dorm fell quiet, dimly lit by the faint glow of the piggy bank.
players were trying to find some level of rest, laying down on their beds with blankets or just simply sitting on their beds.
thanos' eyes stayed on you, watching you as you got into bed, his resentment still burning bright. he was waiting for a moment to catch you off guard and get his revenge.
after laying down with your eyes open, which felt like hours, you decided to go to the bathroom. to wash your face or just to get out of the dorm full of people to get your mind together. you didn’t really know.
you looked over to your brother to see him sound asleep before heading to the door. after convincing the guard you headed to the bathroom, not realizing thanos who left the dorm right after you.
you only took notice of him when the door to the ladies bathroom was kicked open. you, startled, look back to see who it is.
fuck.
“i told you you’d pay for what you did. now…how should i make you pay?” he talked like he was talking to himself.
“i could kill you. easily. but…it would be a shame if something happened to such a beautiful girl like you.”
your words were caught at your throat, not daring to come out.
“maybe i should teach you a lesson, huh?”
that’s how you ended up with your legs wrapped around his waist, his hands gripping tightly at the flesh of your ass as he made you move on his dick, like a little sex toy. his own little fleshlight.
you didn’t know if you hated him for fucking you or yourself for liking it.
he held you up on the air as he thrusted himself into you like you were light as a feather. hands repeatedly landing on your ass, leaving big red hand marks on the surface, making you moan and yelp at the same time.
“fuck! you like this don’t you? you filthy little slut.”
you held onto his shoulders as his pace got faster and he fucked you harder. a knot growing in you, making you disgusted at yourself for liking this but too cock drunk out to care. your eyes closed, too lost in pleasure.
his hand moved from your ass to your stretched out pussy. you didn’t notice it until he pinched your clit, hard, making your eyes shot open with a little scream.
“you look at me when i fuck you.” he ordered. you could only nod.
“tell me who makes you feel this good, bitch. tell me!”
“you! you a-are thanos! fuck-fucking me so good!” you could barely form a sentence at your state.
“yeah i am! come on my cock, baby. make a big fucking mess.” that’s all it took. you fell apart. your walls spasming around him, brain foggy, nails digging at his back, head thrown back, yells and moans spilling from your lips as you came undone.
just when you were about to come down from your high thanos hit your sensitive and twitching clit repeatedly. the pain and pleasure of the act, and how sensitive your body was right after cumming you couldn’t stop yourself from gushing around his dick. your juices covered his lower stomach, his thighs, your thighs as well, and his dick.
that’s when he lost it. he came, hard, when he felt the warm wetness on himself. he held your face, harshly, making you look at him.
“if you even try to do anything to me ever again…you pussy won’t be the only thing i ruin.”
then he kissed you so sweetly. almost sweet enough to make you forget that he threatened to kill you and then fucked you dumb.
#squid game fanfiction#thanos x reader#thanos#kang dae ho x reader#dae ho x reader#choi seunghyun x reader#thanos smut#thanos fanfic#squid game smut#squid game thanos
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photograph- c.leclerc
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or, 5 moments in y/n and charles's life that made the internet go crazy :)
charles leclerc x norris! reader
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AC incident
You walked into Charles’s room, a drink in hand. God, you forgot how hot Monaco was, even this late in the year. When you’d packed to come visit your boyfriend, you’d thought about the cold and miserable weather back home, not the hot, sweaty, humid, and sunny weather of Monaco. That’s how you ended up in a pair of Charles’s shorts, and just your bra.
“Baby?” He called you.
“Hm?” You nodded, not looking up from your phone as you lay on his bed. You knew he liked gaming, especially when it wasn’t much about racing, and you didn’t want to disturb him. But his room was the only one with working AC, and you were about to die in the kitchen’s heat.
When you didn’t get an answer you looked up to see his eyes firmly glued to you, rather than the fifa game he’d just lost. You could hear all his friends shouting at him for missing a goal and costing their team the win.
“What?” You chuckled, getting up and walking over to him.
“You look so beautiful, my love,” he pressed a kiss to your cheek when you bent down beside him, laughing at the comments in his ears about him being down-bad. “So pretty.”
“Thanks baby,” you smiled, casting your eyes to the chat, which was all about you and Charles, either complimenting how good you looked, or how cute you were together.
Landosnandos21: y/n is looking good. DAMN.
y/n’sversion: Monaco weather is a blessing if we get to see mother like this.
Charlesleclerc’stoes: alexa play ‘that should be me’ by justin bieber. (I’m taking about charles his woman is FINE.)
y/n’shairfolical: marriage when? children with perfect genetics when?
Pastryboy81: if he’s not this obsessed with me, i don’t want it.
You laughed at the chat as Charles let his hands wander down your back to your ass, then further to your thighs.
“Hey!” You heard Lando’s voice through his headphones. “Get your hands off my sister! Stop being weird on stream!”
You laughed as Charles dropped his hands from you like you were on fire. “Lando, shut up,” you held your middle finger up to the camera, hoping he’d see it as Charles laughed with you.
“I’m just going to turn the AC on, ok?” You turned to Charles, who stared for a second, then nodded like a puppy. “Thanks,” you smiled, pressing a kiss to his lips, then going back over to the bed and turning the AC on.
His gaming continued for another 20 minutes before he shut off the game and came over to you. “Hello baby,” he smiled, pressing a kiss to your neck as he lay beside you. You kissed back as his hands wrapped around you, pulling you closer. Though his body was warm, you didn’t really mind. “Can we-?” he smiled bashfully and you chuckled.
“Is the stream off?” You asked, knowing his challenges with technology.
“Maybe? I do not know,” he chuckled. “I don’t really care.”
You chuckled, but got up anyway, actually turning off the stream. “Bye guys!” Only a bit embarrassed.
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Bahrain
Charles had been training and preparing since the moment he’d gotten up that morning, aka, he hadn’t seen you. There he sat, in his freezing ice bath, when he caught a glimpse of what he thought to be you, cycling with Carlos. He gave a sneaky look to the camera that was on him, then; one second he was there, his trainer looked away, and the next second, he was gone. Shot off like a rocket in your direction. You and Carlos had to jump off your bikes and almost fall over to get out of his way, and even then he chased you all around the paddock, trying to get a hug.
“Charles! You’re soaking wet!” You laughed as you felt the eyes of the entire team on you two.
“Come on mi amor! I have not seen you all day! I never race my best without seeing you!” He pleaded, still chasing after you.
Your laughing stopped when Carlos grabbed you by the shoulders to stop you from running away, helping Charles’s plan. He held you to his chest as Charles celebrated and thanked him, and as the team videoed.
Finally, Charles made his way over to you and smirked. “A hug, my love?”
And you had no choice. You were passed from Carlos’s arms to Charles’s and hit with the freezing water that coated his swim shorts and his body. “Fuck Charles!” You squealed. “You’re freezing!”
He just laughed and pressed your head further into his neck, pressing kisses to the top of your head as the paddock became a chorus of ‘awws’ and ‘oooos’.
“I’m getting you back for this,” you gritted, low enough so only he could hear it.
He smiled wider. “I know you will.”
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Streaming goes wrong
Charles was doing another stream with the f1 boys, you knew that. Charles liked to get very focused on what he was doing, you knew that. But Charles had also promised to come pick you up from the airport, and after 30 minutes of waiting for Arthur to find his baggage (birthday surprise for Charles), then 40 minutes of waiting for Charles, nothing. Not even a phone call or a text. You were exhausted, Vancouver to Monaco was an 11 hour flight, and you hadn’t slept a wink thanks to the guy in front of you, who’s snores could’ve started an avalanche if they were given the chance.
You opened twitch and pressed on Charles’s stream, to find him busy racing with the other boys. You sighed and decided to just get a cab instead, not wanting to bother him. He could be very forgetful, and you knew that.
After a 32 minute drive, walking up the stairs with your suitcase since the elevator was out of order, and coming inside, you dropped your suitcase by the door, and went straight to your neighbours apartment to get Charles’s other birthday present even if you weren’t going to try and talk to Charles right now, not when you were that angry.
Charless16900: wasn’t y/n coming home today? Did you pick her up?
Charles glanced at the chat to see the message and his face fell. He was meant to pick you up- he looked at his watch- more than an hour ago. He checked his phone to find the messages you’d left and he sighed.
“I am in big trouble,” he told the group, a sorrowful look in his eyes.
George chuckled. “What? Why? What did you do?”
“I forgot to pick up Y/n from the airport!” He groaned. “She got a taxi instead.”
“Oh, so that was the noise from earlier, your door opening,” Alex added.
“What?!” Charles squeaked. “She is home already?”
“I think so mate,” Max laughed. “Good luck.”
Charles got up from his chair for a few minutes to go and talk to you. “Baby?” He called out to the apartment. “I’m sorry?”
And then a pillow was flung at his face. “You dick!” Arthur shouted. “You forgot us at the airport!”
Charles stared at his little brother, completely confused. “What are you doing here?” He chuckled, throwing the pillow back.
“I am here for your birthday surprise!” Arthur explained, throwing the pillow back at him. “You know, the one Y/n set up?”
Charles shook his head, even more confused.
“Thanks Arthur, congratulations, you ruined the surprise,” you walked in with a small dachshund in your arms. “Well, here's the other part of the surprise.”
Charles stared at you. “You got me a dog?” He smiled, taking the dachshund from your arms.
“I got us a dog,” you corrected him. “Happy birthday-eve,” you smiled. “Also fuck you for not picking me up from the airport.”
“Yeah, exactly!” Arthur cheered, annoying Charles. “You could’ve seen me way faster- ew! Stop it!”
Arthur started complaining because Charles had started kissing you. You chuckled into the kiss as one of his arms wrapped around your waist and the other held your new dog. Your arms wrapped around his neck as Arthur threw a pillow at the both of you, causing Charles to pull away and start chasing him around the apartment.
You chuckled to yourself and picked up the pillow, fixing up your bed. Maybe you could forgive Charles for his mistake. Then you looked at his gaming set-up and saw that everything was still on and that he was still streaming.
“Charles!” you scolded, going over and ending the stream with a wave. “Turn off the stream before you run off!”
“Sorry, my love!” He called back.
“And Arthur!” you shouted. “Stop chasing your brother around my house, you’re going to break something!”
“Sorry!” He called back.
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Qualifier
You watched with bated breath as the qualifier for the Monaco GP dragged on. It was the last lap, Oscar right on his tail, and…
He did it. He crossed the finish line first. Ahead of Max, ahead of Oscar, ahead of everyone.
The entire paddock was alive with cheering. Every person pulled someone closer in with hugs and cheers, and it was all thanks to Charles. Arthur and you were jumping up and down, ecstatic that he’d won. As soon as you two could, you ran to the lineup and watched as he jumped out of the car, running straight towards you. He pulled off his helmet, handing it off to someone, then he scooped you up in his arms, a bright smile on his face as he kissed you. The small camera crew and the number of fans around clapped and cheered as cameras flashed and pictures were taken.
“I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” you smiled. “My winner.”
“Your winner, always. And soon, your husband."
Thank god neither of you were wearing microphones.
-----------------
Interview goes south
“Does being Charles Leclerc make you fuck more?”
Charles tried to stifle the shit-eating grin on his face when he looked up and found you with your head in your hands, shaking your head and laughing as the second-hand embarrassment hit you like a freight train.
He chuckled. “I am very lucky, I am very in love and my beautiful girlfriend loves me too,” he smirked. “But the answer is definitely yes,” he laughed as the other interviews burst into uncontrollable laughter. Obviously he was making a joke (no he wasn’t, you two went at it like bunny rabbits), but it was awfully embarrassing for you both. Charles beckoned you over and you obliged, only to set the record straight.
“He’s joking about that,” you clarified. “And don’t be so sure on how much your girlfriend loves you after that answer,” You scolded. Charles laughed, holding you closer and pressing ‘apology’ kisses to any piece of you he could reach. The video ended with Charles chasing you around the paddock as you ducked past people to evaded his capture.
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navigation for my blog :)
#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#formula 1 x you#formula one imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au
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HEYY, I LOVE UR WRITINGG
i have an idea where thanos flirts with reader and immediately reject him, giving him a dirty look or just being rude to him. se-mi is around there so when reader sees her their entire expression changes, giving her a smile or something like that idk 😭
it doesn't have to be exact to that, just take the idea of u like it and use it however u want!!
✦ content: short fluff, how you met your girlfriend at the game while rejecting her friend!
✦ authors note: thank you so much! i was just rewatching and i kept thinking about this idea so i wrote a short fluff, i hope you like it! thank you for your request♥️
⋆。°✩ ever since the games started, you've been along player 120 and player 095. until the third game, where you lost them out of sight. as you heard "group of 5", you kept thinking that maybe this was your last round.
⋆。°✩ i mean there was nothing else to do.. right?
⋆。°✩ until a girl pulled your hand, and somehow you ended up in a room with a purple hair guy, his weird best friend, this girl and a guy who seemed to be her friend.
⋆。°✩ she leaned against the wall, catching her breath, crossing her arms on her chest while staring at you. she has nice piercings.
⋆。°✩ "well, well, well... look at what the wind brought us. a new friend" the purple haired guy spoke, looking at me. "i'm thanos, and who brought this pretty thing?"
you rolled my eyes, trying to copy the brunnete's position.
turning your head to look at her, her piercing gaze stays on you.
"thanks..."
"se-mi" she introduced herself.
"i thought i was about to die out there, thanks se-mi" i said to the girl.
she nodded, thano's best friend chuckled.
"we've been trying to get her name for days, but a pretty girl shows up and that's the first thing she tells her"
i snort as she rolls her eyes and scoffs, mumbling something that sounded like "idiot".
⋆。°✩ of course you couldn't stop talking to her after the third game ended.
⋆。°✩ eating with her, chatting and even laughing. it was easy to forget about everything when you were with her.
⋆。°✩ but sadly, you could never find her alone. if she didn't had min-su following her around, thanos and nam-gyu were teasing her. so that meant you always had to chat with them too, as you tried (really hard) to get her alone.
⋆。°✩ "doll face, came to hear your boy throwing a few lines?" thanos said getting closer to where me and se-mi were sitting down.
"oh my god" i covered my face as i hear her laughing. "i like talking to you so much, but i dont know if it's worth... this" i pointed at thanos.
she smiled, her arm sneaked to rest on my shoulders.
"it's worth every penny. althought you may wanna tell him that you're not really going for boys" she whispered in my ear. i softly laughed as i stare at her. she's so pretty. and her friends so annoying.
"prettiest girls in the planet, listen out, this one's for you-" thanos started.
"listen" i cut him mid-sentence. "you're such a fun, amazing guy" i said, standing up and placing my hands on his shoulder. "and i bet any girl would be so lucky dating you"
he nodded, proud of himself, as se-mi stared smirking.
"but i think there's something that would make you even a better person" i said looking at him, straight in the eyes. "leave to a corner and please let me have ten minutes alone so i can flirt with se-mi"
⋆。°✩ his expression quickly fell as se-mi and nam-gyu snorted.
"so im not about to be your boy-"
"you're not. i'm not into guys, thanos. but you're...so...nice"
⋆。°✩ he quickly understood. apparently. at least he went away along with his best friend. it was more than enough.
⋆。°✩ "so.. can we go back to the flirting part?" se-mi said, her smile never fading as she played with her lip piercing.
"yeah, i think we finally can" i said, dragging her to sit with me in one of the beds.
⋆。°✩ no need to clarify anything else. the guys understood when the next time they saw you, se-mi was hugging you from behind, resting her chin on your shoulder.
⋆。°✩ se-mi couldn't stop teasing thanos for falling for two times for two lesbians girls, which always ended up with him telling her how he'd release a rap called 'revenge is sweeter than girls' against her once they were out of here.
⋆。°✩ you believe him. you'll hear more about it once you're out of here, holding your girlfriend's hand.
#se mi x reader#se-mi x reader#player 380 x reader#player 380#se-mi#se mi#squid games#squid games 2#squid games x reader#lesbian#wlw#fluff
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Thank you... for playing with me.
Pt.1
Bake No Hana (Nightcord at 25:00 ft. Kaito)
"It's finally come around, my punishment for having been born. In order to put an end to it, I stop breathing— Ah, I'm fed up with this."
I approached the girl who chose me last round, Penelope. I called her Penny though, and thought the name was cute.
It suits her.
Last round I wasn’t sure exactly what I was going to do, but she pulled me into her group, and even against the male group, we won!
It didn’t help that crunch that echoed across the room each time a team lost though, Astro has been colder than ever and the old guy got separated from me before I could follow him. I think it was fate that we all ended up on the same team.
I’m trying to sound positive because, at this moment in time, I have gone too far to give up now, whether that be hope or, the sick truth, for the money.
My mind is always racing and is looking for the truth that I’m hiding from myself.
I’ve killed people intentionally or not, just to keep going for a cash prize that I’m not even sure I’ll win.
This isn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
I’ve said that line so many times.
When I was 5 and my mother ran away, that wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
When I kept getting neglected and abused in the manor, that wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
When I got kicked out at the mere age of 18, That wasn’t the situation I wanted to be in.
Getting into debt and sinking deeper into the amount needed to pay back, I bet you can think of the line I said next.
And now with all the corpses I’ve been near, the money dropping into the pig, the masked soldiers that looked upon you with their weapons, was this really how I was going to be free from debt? Was this the situation I wanted to be in?
“Hey!” Penny turned to look at me.
“Want to pair up?” I tilted my head at her.
“Why should I?”
“I don’t picture you going around here and begging these jerks.” I looked around at our options.
“Wouldn’t that bother you?” I raised an eyebrow to her.
“Bothering me or not isn’t the concern, winning or losing is.” Despite that, she didn’t make any plans to move away from me.
I cheered fondly at her.
“Then play with me, I’ll make sure you’ll win.”
“What will you do?”
“Whatever it takes.”
“... What do you see in me?”
“Well, I wanted to ask you that.”
“You were someone who looked like they would come with me.”
“I feel the same way.” I raised my hand offering a handshake.
She took my hand, so warm compared to how she acted, and I tightened the grip before releasing her hand.
I’m glad we got the teams out of the way before the timer ended.
—
Third POV
“Alright, there's a five-minute break before the games start, my good sirs. Do whatever you’d like before coming back to meet up and enjoy the show, they’ll be playing marble games.” The frontman announced before everyone dispersed.
“What was that imbecile thinking, joining a game like this? She even had the option to leave and she chose to come back?!” Damian scoffed, rolling his eyes out of agitation.
“They did…” Duke murmured.
“No, they didn’t.” Damian looked at Duke as if he were mad.
“Yes, they did, a while back? You were there and berated them for acting like their mother…” Duke rebutted.
“That must’ve felt so humiliating…”
Dick rubbed his arm.
“... she was probably terrified to face you again, especially with how you treated her…”
Damian piped down after that.
“You’re not any better than us, Duke. You also shunned them away,” Tim said, defending himself and the others.
“I’m not saying I’m better than anyone and this doesn’t excuse what I did but all of you guys made it known through the whole manor that she was just like her mother, so greedy for money that even when she had too much she wanted more, is that what we’re seeing in front of us though?! A girl who's so loaded but still wants more?!” That left Tim speechless and guilty.
“I know what it’s like to be financially unstable, obviously after losing my parents and trying to find them it wasn’t easy, and it didn’t make it any easier with not even a penny in my pocket, so these people “killing themselves for a little money” even though it’s a life or death situation, that’s no different then being “free” out there, especially not in Gotham. So when Bruce rescued me and treated me with kindness and support, I thought that all his kids got this treatment, but now you guys want to berate her and call her an idiot but she was forced into this position…”
He turned to Bruce but was only met with the man looking away.
“Maybe when she left this game, she realized her life wasn’t meant enough and came back to this dehumanizing environment, she didn’t come for us to help her because of the memories of last time, she probably was so nervous always walking on eggshells around us that the moment we rejected her she knew that this was her only option.”
Jason knew it wasn’t targeted specifically at him, but at one point, he knew he had a bond with [name], that innocent kid with those cute bug eyes and that gummy smile. They had something special. Then he died and came back with the news. At that moment, he couldn’t help but feel betrayed by [name]’s mom. With everything that had happened to him,, he had changed his character, so with no one to blame…
Well, you are your mother’s daughter.
Doesn’t the saying go ‘like mother, like daughter?’
Also, the situation didn’t help with him constantly not talking to her, you’d have understood the feeling he got when she came to the manor after being kicked out just to beg for money?
He seriously could not blame the situation on you, did he, or did he forget that he contributed to it too?
The ignoring, the sneering, the insults, how one looks from the person she trusted the most could shatter her heart.
And of course that would be the first conversation she had with you... You didn’t talk to her.
“Well, did you guys hear what she said to that other girl, seems she has no plans-”
A knock interrupted the chat.
“I’m sorry sirs, but the games are starting. May I have your bets?”
“240”
“Wow, all of you, just in case she ever loses, would you guys like to buy her body? I assume you’re family and had an interest in that girl?”
“You!-” Damian was stopped by Bruce, who also had his hands clenched in anger.
“Thank you, that would be appreciated.” Smiled Bruce.
“Of course, and I didn’t mean you lose the bet, it’s just that the odds are against some players and good for others.” The Frontman nodded before heading off.
“Don’t worry, guys. Just hang on. I’m finding the location as fast as I can,” Oracle said through the earpiece before they left for the lounge.
Their nice, comfortable lounge.
—
If I am ready to die, why not know a little bit more about the person I’m spending my last moments with?
“You know~ since the last Joker attack nothing has been this tragic…”
“What game are we playing?” No small talk then… but that’s okay.
“Dang, you’re cold as ice.”
“What game are we playing, girl?”
“You tell me. These games are probably only known to these oldies, tell you what let’s make our own game, ten marbles we could do anything with that.
“So let’s… end this game in a single round.” I looked down at my lap.
“All or nothing. A simple bet.” I looked back at her again with my stupid smile that showed my gums and tilted my head.
It was something I was used to doing a lot as a kid.
I don’t know why I’m acting like this, maybe it’s because my misery will finally end.
That took a dark turn. Let’s get back on track.
“Don’t tell me you’d… rather do what they’re doing?”
We looked at the old guys behind Penny, throwing their marbles that hit against each other. What was the purpose of the game?
Get the other players' marbles out before they do.
“Okay. Playing what then?”
I huffed in amusement.
“What’s with the hurry?”
“You’re just dying to kill me, huh?” I teased
That was a rhetorical question, we both knew it…
At least I knew it was.
“We’ve got a lot of time on our hands, and we’re playing one round. What’s the rush?”
“What are we gonna do before then?”
“Talk” It had been a while since I’d done that with somebody in this hellhole.
“About what?”
“Things we never told anybody about I guess.”
“One of us is gonna die, so… it doesn't matter what we tell each other. No one can really embarrass themselves anymore. Okay?”
—
“How long have you been in Gotham? It isn’t a place where one would particularly reside.” We were both sitting at the stairsteps at this point.
I started with a question.
“Just been here since I was born, my mom found the “love of her life” here. She said we’d enjoy it”
“Did you?”
“...” She didn’t reply but rather stayed silent.
“Your family, are they still here with you?”
“My brother.”
“Any parents?”
“My father died getting shot in some back alleyway, at the wrong place, at the wrong time.”
“And your mom?”
“She got high off of drugs when she lost my dad, she overdosed not too long ago and her family took her away from us blaming us for the reason she suffers. I don’t know if she’s still alive and recovering or dead.”
“Where’s your brother now then?”
“In a shelter,” she hesitated. I was asking more than giving, but she still replied, and that was enough for both of us.
“If you win this and get the money, what will you spend it on?”
“Buy a house for me and my brother, then take us somewhere else, Gotham is no place for us, even if the top schools are here, there’s a price to pay for everything.” She was right about that.
I scoffed a little bored of that answer.
“Hey~ with this amount of money you could buy that and so much more- is there anywhere you’d like to travel?”
“Houma.”
“Houma?”
She nodded her head.
“It looked peaceful and had lower crime rates than most places. It didn’t look like Gotham at all.”
I couldn’t help but huff at that.
“Hey. Don’t you think you should dream bigger, huh? Do Keystone City. Hold on– Go to Metropolis instead. They even have lower crime rates than most.
Penny finally turned her head around and looked at me for once out of this entire conversation.
“Metropolis?”
“Yeah, the Superfam lives there. You know the Kryptonite versions of the Batfam in Gotham?”
It seems she didn’t care much about superheroes which made me giggle.
“Really?”
She shook her head.
“Oh no, then we have you fix that, we’ll have a girl’s night out every week in Metropolis and get to meet the Superfam in the flesh, okay?”
She looked away at that.
“Oh, guess we can’t both leave here?”
…
“Back when my father was alive he was the perfect guy, he was too generous for his good, I was too naive as a kid rushed into the room where he laid to rest before he was covered and saw his gorey body,” Penny told me.
“The first body I saw was this poor kid on the side of the street abandoned just like me, he died inhaling too much of Scarecrow’s gas.”
“Abandoned?”
“Oh! I haven’t told you my backstory, it’s not as tragic as yours, no. My mother married a billionaire and took cash before running away without me when I was five. Everybody blamed her actions on me, making me feel too shameless to ever ask for cash, then I got kicked out at eighteen and took too much debt for regular supplies and school debt then landed here.”
“I wonder if I had money, what would I do… Go to Houma with you?”
A silence ensued between us making me look away.
“Sorry, I forgot again.”
As the timer started running out the sun kept going down even lower. Penny stood up.
“Let’s do this.” I smiled at that.
—
Third POV
By now, some VIPs were disappointed not because they had lost money but because they had lost the guessing game of lives.
Others were happy with the result.
But for our main characters well, can you guess how they’re feeling?
Unnerved, whatever [name] was planning. Are they going to win this game, or will they lose? Would the Wayne family see their dear family die with a bullet to the head?
Bruce never meant to treat you like that, but you’d have to understand your mother betrayed him, and you were there… and you didn’t do anything.
Oh, what could you have done?
Alert the whole house of her leaving? Then what?
It was never your fault, you did everything you could to appease them, they just never forgive your mother.
—
We stood up passing a dead body and went to an “empty” land.
“Whoever can roll it farther than the other person wins, okay?”
I let Penny get the head start.
I held my marble in my hand.
Pondering.
I didn’t have much to live for, did I?
I had no friends, no family, and nothing to my name other than the daughter of a gold digger or the bastard child.
What’s the point?
I I guess this game was pointless after all.
I let the marble slide off my hands landing a few inches from my foot.
Straightening my posture I feel Penelope approach me.
“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?” She grabbed me by the collar of the tracksuit.
“You win, I lose.”
“Stop. Why the hell would you try to do that?” She still kept a firm hold on me.
“Butter fingers, what can I say?” I chuckled, scrunching my eyebrows at her.
“Making sure I won. Is that what this is?”
She slammed me into the wall again.
“Did you think I would be grateful? Throw it again.” She demanded.
“And I still wouldn’t be able to win.” I kept my smile on.
“Ugh, don’t be dramatic and let me die in style, hm?”
This was the reality, and if one of us had something memorable to do once we had gotten out of there, it would be her. Wouldn’t it?
“[name], that’s bullshit! Stop acting cool and just do a real throw!”
I sighed no longer keeping my damn smile on my face.
“I have nothing.”
“What?” Penelope didn’t let go, though. It seemed like she would allow me to talk a bit more.
“You have a reason to get out of this place… I don’t.”
Penelope kept breathing shakily.
“I thought hard about what I would do, over and over, nothing. It’s like a dead end.” I felt myself tearing up.
I didn’t want to burst out in tears, I hadn’t done that in a while.
I’ve always hated getting emotional, but it feels like a relief to get it off my chest.
“If anybody has a reason to go back out still there, it’d be you.” I laughed despite tasting the salty tears that leaked from my eyes.
Penelope didn’t seem the type to get emotional either, though that didn’t stop her from letting a couple of tears flow.
“Don’t die here, go out there… and find a place where you and your brother can reside. Far from any crime preferably to Houma.” I chuckled.
…
As Penelope walked away, I didn’t want that to be how our interaction ended, no, not like this pathetic goodbye.
“Penny!” I wasn’t sure she’d respond to that nickname but to my surprise, she stopped.
It made me widen my eyes briefly before going into a somber expression.
I held in my tears at that moment, stabilizing my voice.
“Thank you… for playing with me.” I was glad the guard let me have my closure, you don’t think they’d have the heart with their roles.
BANG
Player 240, eliminated.
—
The blood sprayed out before her body collapsed onto the ground with a sickening thud.
This wasn’t the situation anybody wanted to be in.
—
That’s it for now. In the next part of this option, the Batfamily will suffer and have flashbacks, as one does. If anyone has any advice on how to write some scenes, that would be spectacular.
I’ll be working on a request and then my So Much More series before getting to Astro! And then maybe the next part of this, so don’t expect it anytime soon. That’s all from me!
Taglist time! ❤
Also, I love the idea and from fic from both @jellyfishmoon97 and @not-weirdoshrek and a new addition that I'm super happy I bumped into @alilobsessive.
@holysoulsweets @sh4rk-k1d @sillysealsies @loomspuddle @cantfindmelol @alwaysholymilkshake @leitor-sonolento @randomlyappearingartist @beyondblissxoxo @sirairi @yhin-gg @frankie-moon3 @welpthisisboring @yokesmam @bat1212 @enchantingarcadecreation @twismare @delias-stuff @ladylupuscrow @ferchu0406 @c4xcocoa @cruzerforce4256 @anonymoushehehehe @godoreo22 @blerp-22 @facelessisnthere @sirenetheblogger @themightybee4067 @boredselkie @tiffyisme3760 @random4137 @midnightgrimoire @mybones537 @chaoticmoontimetravel @jsprien213
I think that's everyone who wanted to be tagged, I hope I didn't spell any wrong and tag the wrong person.
#platonic batfam#platonic yandere batfam#yandere batfam#yandere batfamily#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfamily x reader#batfam x neglected reader#squid game au#batfam x batsis#batfam
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Out of the Pages
➳ Paige Bueckers x reader
➳ Navigation Post - here!
➳ introvert x extrovert - worlds meet
➳ Pure fluff, not proof read, idk guys, it's been a while. ➳ reader really is just me...
➳ Word count: 3.1k
The soft afternoon sun filters through the curtains of the small apartment you share with your girlfriend in downtown Storrs, casting a warm, golden light over the neat rows of books on your beloved bookshelf. Through the open window, you can hear the people talking on the street as they embrace the last warm days before it eventually gets colder.
October is halfway over, and it won’t be long until the basketball season starts back up again, leaving Paige and her teammates in a constant state of excitement as they are making the last preparations. But in this apartment, curled up in your favorite armchair, you are at peace, absorbed in the pages of your book as you try to solve the case alongside the main character—a stark contrast to the lively chaos your girlfriend thrives in. It’s that very difference that makes your relationship work so well, despite what other people say.
In one of the restaurants close by a glass is dropped, pulling your focus from the book. A quick glance at the clock tells you that it shouldn’t be too much longer until Paige comes home. Practice ended 20 minutes ago, but most days she stayed a bit later, getting some more shots in, trying to perfect them to the best of her abilities, before she finally walked the 5-minute way back to your joint home.
With a sigh you close your book, realizing that you should probably get a start on dinner. You had always been the kind of person who found joy in the quieter moments in life. Reading a good mystery book and savoring the stillness that came with an afternoon without classes. Paige thrived in the energy of the crowd and the adrenaline of the game, while you cherished the simple things. A nice, hot, cup of tea. The feeling of a brand new book in your hands. Rain hitting your window in the fall. Knowing that she will walk through your front door in a couple of minutes, happy to fall into your comforting arms and tell you everything that happened.
But even with you being a more private person, Paige loved you loudly. Nearly every second day she posts a pic of you on her Story. Sometimes she posts little videos of how you’re dancing around in the kitchen with her or how her teammates are interacting with you. In interviews, it’s hard to get her to stop talking about you, because no matter what the topic is, she is guaranteed to talk about you. And her fans love every second of it, and they love every bit of you. While she chases perfection on the court, you find perfection in the little things—in the way her eyes light up when she talks about her day, in the quiet moments when you simply exist together, side by side. And everyone loves watching you two be in love.
“Hi, Lovie!” Not once in your life has Paige walked through your front door quietly. So just like most days, the door flings open, as your girlfriend grins at you. “Oh, you look good, Baby!” And just like most days, she pulls the ‘o’s’ in good as long as she can. “Love, I’m wearing a sweater and shorts.” You deadpan at her while you drain the pasta and pour it into a pan. “I know Baby. But it’s my sweater and those shorts… Yeah, I don’t think I need to say it.” Warm arms wrap themselves around you as your girlfriend clings to you, looking over your shoulder and watching you finish the sauce. “There is no protein in there, Baby.” With a scoff you shrug her off, pushing her towards the bathroom. “Wash your hands, dinner is ready.”
A soft kiss was pressed against your cheek as Paige joined you at the table. “Thank you for cooking Ma.” With a soft hum you lean into her touch, a small smile playing at your lips as you reply, "Anything for you, Love." The blonde lets out a satisfied moan as she takes the first bite, “This is incredible.” As quickly as you can you pull a face, “There is no protein in there, baby”, mocking what she said earlier to you, in your best ‘Paige voice’. One of her eyebrows shoots up, daring you to test her again.
As the playful banter continues between the two of you, Paige's eyes gleam with a mischievous spark. "You know," she says, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms, "You can't stay cooped up in this apartment forever. How about coming out with me this weekend?"
You give her a knowing smile, already sensing where this conversation is headed. "Oh, Paige, you know I’d rather spend my time at home." She pouts dramatically, “But baby, it’s not just some loud party. It’s gonna be fun! Just a little get-together with the team and some friends. Nothing too crazy, I promise. Azzi told me about it.”
You roll your eyes affectionately, “I’ve heard that before. And I also remember how we ended up staying until 2 a.m. last time because you couldn't stop dancing.” Paige laughs, a sound like music filling the room, one of your favorite sounds there is. "Okay, fair point, but this time, I swear, it’s different. It's going to be relaxed—chill vibes, a few drinks, good music. Just a chance to hang out together."
You look at her skeptically, already shaking your head. “I don’t know, Paige… I’m really not the party type.” Your girlfriend leans in closer, her grin widening. "I know that, babe. And that’s exactly why I think you should come, just this once. It could be good for you to step out of your comfort zone. Who knows? You might even enjoy it." You laugh softly, but the idea still feels foreign to you. “I think my comfort zone is a pretty nice place, actually.”
“Come on,” Paige nudges you gently. “Just think about it, okay?”
You nod, more to humor her than out of any real intention of agreeing. "I’ll think about it," you say, and Paige gives you a triumphant little cheer, knowing that everything but a ‘no’ is a victory.
Over the next few days, Paige doesn't let it go. She brings it up casually while you’re both cooking dinner, or when you're curled up on the couch together. “You know, they’ll have those little sliders you love at the party,” she mentions offhandedly one evening. Another day, she adds, “It could be like a mini-date night… just us two, but, like, with other people.”
You can’t help but smile at her persistence, though you keep gently declining each time. “I’m really not sure, Paige,” you respond, even as she keeps layering on reasons and reassurances, each argument filled with her enthusiasm.
Finally, one evening, as you’re sitting together watching a show, Paige takes a more serious tone. “Listen, love,” she says, turning towards you and taking your hand. “I know you’re not into these kinds of things, and I respect that. I love that you’re different. But I think it could be fun for us to do something a little out of the ordinary… together. Just this once.”
You tilt your head, considering her words, but still unsure. “And if I don’t have a good time?”
Paige smiles, her eyes soft. “Then we leave. No questions asked. I’ll stay by your side the entire time, I promise. I just… I just want to see you in my world, even if it’s just for one night. We can leave whenever you want. I promise you won’t be alone in it. I’ll be by your side the whole time, and Nika is gonna be there, and Azzi and KK, the whole team really. You love them! Deal?”
Her sincerity touches you, and you feel a small tug at your heart. You know how much this means to her, how much she wants to share every aspect of her life with you, just as she proudly shares you with the world.
With a sigh, you finally relent. “Alright, fine. I’ll go. But I’m holding you to that promise. One step out of line, and we’re out.” Paige’s face lights up with a brilliant smile, and she throws her arms around you in a tight hug. “Deal, baby. And trust me, it’ll be fun. You’ll see.” You smile back, feeling the warmth of her excitement radiating off her.
“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” she litters small kisses all over your face, as the blonde just can’t help herself, hiding her face in the crook of your neck. “If you hadn’t said yes today, I wasn’t gonna go either.” The jerk of your head was exactly what she had expected after telling you her little secret. At your whines, she could only laugh, “Nuh-uh. you said yes. Now We’re goin'!”
The night of the party arrives faster than you expected, and you find yourself standing in front of the mirror, adjusting your clothes nervously. Paige, ever the enthusiast, had picked out a comfortable yet stylish outfit for you, something that she assured would help you “blend in but still look cute." You catch her reflection in the mirror as she comes up behind you, wrapping her arms around your chest, her smile warm and encouraging. “You look perfect,” she says, and you know she means it.
Your nerves build with every meter on the way to the party. The streets are busier than usual for a usual Saturday night, and you can already hear the faint thrum of music coming from a few blocks away. Paige’s right hand found its usual place, your thigh, as she rubbed comforting circles. “Remember,” she murmurs softly, loud enough that you can hear her over the open windows that let in the cooling evening air, “we can leave whenever you want. This is just for fun, okay?”
You nod, trying to take a deep breath and push down the flutter of anxiety in your chest. The music grows louder as you approach the house, the bass thumping through the walls as the blonde parks the car. Laughter and chatter spill out into the street, a warm glow radiating from the windows. Paige squeezes your hand one last time before opening her car door, jogging around, and helping you out of your seat.
Inside, the atmosphere is exactly as you imagined—people are scattered around, chatting in groups, dancing, or playing games. You immediately feel a wave of discomfort wash over you. It’s not just the noise, but the sheer number of people crammed into the small space. Paige senses your hesitation and keeps you close, her arm slipping around your waist protectively.
“Hey, it’s okay,” she whispers, her lips close to your ear. “Just breathe. We’ll find a quieter corner.” She guides you gently through the crowd, smiling and waving at friends as you pass by. You catch snippets of conversations and see faces turning your way, but Paige’s presence keeps you grounded. She introduces you to a few people, all of them friendly enough, but the whirlwind of names and faces makes your head spin.
How does this girl know everyone?
Finally, you reach a quieter spot near the kitchen, where the noise is a bit more subdued. Paige grabs two drinks, handing one to you. “Here, something light,” she says with a wink. “No pressure to drink if you don’t want to, but it might help you relax.”
You take a tentative sip, and Paige’s smile widens. “See? Not so bad, right?” You give her a small smile in return, still feeling a bit overwhelmed but comforted by her presence. For a few minutes, things seem to settle. Paige chats animatedly with a few friends who come by to say hello, and you listen quietly, feeling a little more at ease just being by her side.
But then, KK and Ice, two of Paige’s closest friends and teammates, approach with wide grins. “Paige!” KK exclaims, throwing an arm around her shoulder. “We’re about to start a game of beer pong. You in?”
Paige glances at you, “Nah, I’m good right where I am,” she says firmly, smiling at her friends. “I’m here to spend time with my girl tonight.”
KK raises an eyebrow, her grin widening. “Your girl can play too, you know,” she teases, glancing over at you with a playful challenge in her eyes. “Come on, it’s just a game. We promise not to make it too competitive… unless you want us to.” Ice laughs and nods, chiming in, “Yeah, it’ll be fun! You’ve got Paige on your team, so you’re already halfway to winning!”
Paige looks at you, her eyes searching yours for a moment. She can see the hesitation written all over your face, the way your fingers lightly grip her arm, not wanting to let go. You give her a small, almost imperceptible shake of your head, and she instantly understands.
She turns back to KK and Ice, flashing a charming smile. “You know what? I think I’m gonna sit this one out tonight,” she says smoothly. “We’re just here to chill and have a quiet night. Maybe next time?”
KK chuckles, catching the subtle glance between you and Paige. “Alright, alright, we get it. No pressure,” she teases with a grin. “You two are inseparable, huh?” Paige just shrugs, her grin widening as she pulls you closer to her side. “Can you blame me?” she quips back, her tone light but sincere.
KK and Ice exchange a knowing look, teasing her with playful jabs. “Oh, come on, Paige, you’re whipped,” KK laughs, but there’s no malice in it—just teasing their friend.
“Damn right, I am,” Paige grins, pulling you closer. “And proud of it.”
They laugh and shake their heads. "Alright, alright," Ice says, “we’ll catch you later then.” They wander off, leaving you and Paige in your little corner.
As they wander off to join the others, Paige turns to you, her smile softening. “I’ve got you, always,” she murmurs, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You feel the tension in your shoulders ease a bit, and you nod. “Thank you,” you whisper, and Paige leans in to press a gentle kiss to your temple. “No big deal Ma.,” she replies softly.
“Tell me about your book, baby. What happened in the last chapter? Did Pip figure it out?”
You can’t help but smile at her genuine interest. Paige has heard you ramble on about countless books, and every time she listens as if it’s the most important thing in the world. "Well," you start, your voice a little shaky but gaining confidence as you go on, "Pip thinks she has it all figured out, but there’s this new twist... the suspect has an alibi that throws her entire theory out the window."
Paige’s eyes widen dramatically. “No way!” she exclaims, leaning in closer as if this story was the most gripping thing she'd ever heard. “I was sure she had it this time. What’s she going to do now?”
You laugh softly at her enthusiasm, feeling more at ease. "She’s back to square one, basically. But she’s determined to find a new lead, and I think she’s getting closer to the truth."
Paige nods, fully absorbed in your words, her blue eyes fixed on you with a look of admiration that makes your heart flutter. For a moment, the noise and energy of the party fade away, and it’s just the two of you, sharing this quiet little world together. It’s these moments that remind you why you took the chance to come here tonight—for her, for this.
Just then, from across the room, Azzi catches sight of Paige and nudges Nika, who follows her gaze. They both burst into giggles, catching the attention of KK and Ice, who turns to see what’s so amusing.
“Look at her,” Azzi whispers to the group, a grin spreading across her face. “She’s got the puppy dog eyes again.”
KK snickers, “She’s totally whipped. She looks like she’s watching a sunrise or something.”
Nika laughs quietly, nodding. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look at anyone like that,” she adds, her voice filled with a touch of wonder. “It’s actually really cute.”
Ice chuckles, shaking her head. “That’s love, right there,” she says with a smile. “The girl’s completely gone for her.”
Meanwhile, Paige remains blissfully unaware of her friends’ teasing, still fully focused on you, hanging on to every word as you continue to tell her about the next chapter. Her hand finds yours, squeezing it gently, her thumb tracing light circles over your skin.
After a few moments, you catch sight of her friends watching from across the room, and you feel a blush creep up your cheeks. “Paige,” you whisper, nudging her slightly. “Your friends are staring.”
Paige glances over and catches their teasing expressions. She rolls her eyes with a grin, then turns back to you, unabashed. “Let them stare,” she says softly, her voice filled with warmth. “I’ve got everything I want right here.”
You feel your heart swell with affection as Paige leans in and presses a soft kiss to your forehead. The party continues around you, but it feels like the noise has dimmed just a little, leaving a bubble of peace around the two of you.
Eventually, the evening winds down, and as the crowd begins to thin, you realize that Paige is right. It wasn’t so bad—actually, it was more than that. You had fun in your own way, simply by being there with her, sharing in her world.
As you make your way back to the car, hand in hand, Paige looks at you with a triumphant smile. “See?” she says, her eyes sparkling with mischief and joy. “Told you it would be fun.” You roll your eyes, but you’re smiling, too. “Okay, okay,” you admit. “Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.”
As you reach the car, she stops and turns to face you, her expression turning sincere. “Thank you,” she whispers. “For tonight, and for always being my safe place.” You lean in and kiss her softly, your heart full. “I love you, Paige,” you murmur against her lips. “Anywhere with you is where I want to be.”
And with that, you both get into the car and drive back home together, knowing that whether in a crowded party or a quiet apartment, you have everything you need as long as you have each other.
#Paige Bueckers x Reader#Paige Bueckers imagine#Paige Bueckers fanfic#Paige Bueckers x you#UConn Women’s Basketball#womens basketball#uconn wbb#uconn x reader#wnba#paige bueckers
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Choi Subong “Thanos” - No regrets.
Warning : canon typical violence, death, blood, drug use.
Genre : angst
Synopsis : Thanos, your friend of a few years, finds you after the green light red light and asks you to team up with him. Nothing bad can happen, right ?
Reader : male (you/yours)
A/N : bold is in English // 500 million won = 342 000$ // "No winner" was an exception so idk what this one is…
You have known Thanos for a few years now and you quickly became vital for each other, like attached to the hip and somehow along the way, feelings began to bloom, though neither of you ever acted on them.
Not that he’s shy, far from it, he even would’ve asked you out the second he realized his love for you. But then he remembered how badly the Korean people could react to a public figure coming out as queer, making it harder for him to reach his goal to become a popular rapper in Korea, no, the whole world.
So he waited, and waited, hoping to move on. But you were constantly with him, maybe he should’ve stopped inviting you at the rap contest he was participating in or his few concerts, cheering for him with his fans.
Moving on was hard, if not impossible.
Then, during the finals of the show he was participating in, he forgot the lyrics to his rap and lost. And it kept going downhill, to the point of losing everything on crypto money and being indebted of 500 million won more to the already big debt he had. Not seeing an end to it, the relentlessness of life with his feelings, dreams, and means, Thanos walked to a bridge, considering jumping before a man approached him to play a game of ddakji.
And so he found himself in a strange place with hundreds of people and armed guards with masks.
He thought he’d just have to play the games and win and waltz out of here debts free, but the stakes were higher than what he had thought after seeing the pretty player 196 die from a headshot after moving during the green light red light game.
Starting to panic, he popped a colored pill from his cross and swallowed it, waiting for its quick effects. He didn’t have to wait much and within a minute he was running dancing with a big smile on his face, even pushing to death three people before him.
It’s after the 5 minute timer that he saw you, catching your breath with wide eyes as you looked around in shock. What the fuck just happened ? You had some blood on your face and clothes, yet, Thanos still found you good looking, the blood not disturbing him.
He approached you, pushing anyone on his way and without waiting for you to notice him, he began to talk.
“What are you doing here ? You have debts ?” He said, tapping your shoulder.
Your eyes widened again at the sound of his voice as you looked at him, blinking surprised.
“Huh ? T ?” You said as he posed at the sound of his nickname. You had seen him on the screen earlier, but you didn’t expect to actually find him here.
“Das me, yea.” He posed one last time before continuing speaking. “How much ?”
“Huh ?”
“Your debts.”
“Why would I tell you ? You didn’t tell me how you lost all your shit.”
“Crypto money.” He replied without missing a beat.
You blinked at him, surprised, and pointed at him.
“You… too ?”
“MG Coin got you too ?” He looked at you with an equally surprised face.
“What ? No. Who ? I’m just shit at understanding how it works.” You robbed your forehead, remembering with irritation all your actions that led you here.
“Yeah and you’re fucking stubborn, I can see you trying and trying even after losing multiple times.”
“I don’t want any comments from you, didn’t you do the same ?”
“Nope ! Went all-in. In one go !” He said, moving his hands around as if to look cool.
You sighed before letting out a small laugh.
“This isn’t a contest but I feel like you’re winning and not in a good way.”
He smirked clearly not caring about your last words, he had won, that’s what mattered.
“Wanna play together, my bro ? I already have a small group, I can squeeze you in.” He asked, crossing his arms before raising one hand in the air, ready to dap you.
“Sure, what’s the worst that could happen ?” You replied, dapping him.
Since then, you stayed with Thanos and the group he made himself. A fan, a new friend that he kept butchering the name of, a shy guy and a cool girl.
The games weren’t easy even if it made you remember your childhood, but even with death flying around all of you, Thanos and soon Namgyu made things less intense.
The third game was over and you had survived once more. Then as planned the vote of the day came but ended in a tie to which the square guard told everyone another vote was coming but to take a break before it would start.
A lot of people from both sides went to the bathroom while you stayed on one of the beds of your now reduced group. The cool girl and shy guy had voted X, no longer wanting to play the games, and the fan, Gyeongsu, was dead, so only you, Thanos and Namgyu remained. But after 5 long minutes you started to wonder what was taking them so long to just take a shit. So you stood up and asked to be let out to go to the bathroom, a guard accompanying you.
As you finally approached the door, Minsu rushed out, running past you. Then you heard commotion and as you opened the door…
Chaos.
Everyone was at each other’s throat, punching, kicking and hitting one another.
You saw Thanos on player 333 as they strangled each other while he cursed in both Korean and English. Quickly you went to grab him, wanting to get out of here as fast as possible, but Thanos swiftly pushed you away, making you land on your ass.
As you moved and tried to stay out of the way of everyone you noticed player 333 pulling a silver thing out of his pocket and planting it in Thanos’ throat. You yelled, trying to get closer but before you could grab him, player 333 had stabbed him a second time before pushing him away and hiding inside the toilet stall, locking it.
“Fuck !”
You grabbed Thanos, cursing to yourself, and hid in the second toilet. His hand was shaking against his throat, holding the fork, blood spilling between his fingers. You moved his hand, placing yours instead, trying to stop the wounds from bleeding.
You had tears in your eyes as you began to panic, his were wide as he tried to breathe and cough out the blood, choking on it.
“Fuck dude !” You cried out, you could feel his heartbeat on the palm of your hand. “Why did you do this when I’m not here !”
You pulled him closer, shaking, his head resting on your chest as he continued to choke, his heartbeat slowing down dangerously.
“You fucking dumbass.” You didn’t know what to do, your favorite person was dying and you couldn’t do anything to help him.
He looked at you with horror as he realized what was going to inevitably happen, one hand grabbing your arm while the other went to your cheek, trembling, weakly caressing it, smudging blood on your skin.
“I” He managed to get out, coughing up blood on himself and your clothes, struggling, looking at you, scared. It was now or never, he thought. “I lo- …yo-” He tried to articulate, though panic, blood and pain were making it difficult.
You let out a frustrated yell before planting a kiss on his forehead.
“Fuck you, Subong ! Tell me when you survive this ! You can survive this, right, it’s just a fork ! Don’t fucking die, man !” As you cried, your tears fell on his face as slowly his eyes lost their light.
His heart had stopped beating, his hands falling to his sides. Thanos was no longer shaking and struggling against you but blood was still pooling by your hand and clothes.
You closed your eyes, his dead ones looking right at you. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Your body kept shaking as you held him tightly against you, too scared to get out, waiting for the fight to stop, for everything to end.
When it finally died out, you heard a knock, making you jump.
“Who’s that ?” You asked, your voice hoarse, quiet, it was evident you were still crying.
“Me. Namgyu. Is he… ?”
You unlocked the door, wiping your tears quickly, putting Thanos’ blood on your face inadvertently.
“Shit !” Namgyu kneeled, hands moving against Thanos’ shoulders. “That fucking MG Coin…”
And then, he pulled the fork out of his throat, from between your fingers, more blood gushing out. It almost made you puke in your mouth.
“For revenge.” He said with a weak smile, carefully hidding the bloody fork in his clothes. “Do you think… I can take this too ?” He pointed to the big cross Thanos had around his neck. “It’s just- You know…”
He gave you another small smile before unlocking the necklace and taking it before you could say anything. You didn’t have a good reason to stop him anyway.
“Once it’s empty, give it to me, okay ?” You finally said and he nodded slowly.
Then the bathroom door creaked open, the guards were there. Big guns and human sized black boxes to take in the casualties.
“Come on, let’s go.” Namgyu said quietly, pulling you by your elbow.
You didn’t want to leave, not ready to abandon Thanos’ body. But you had to, so you closed his eyes before slowly getting up as you laid him on the stained ground. Namgyu held you close, helping you walk away, the others followed you quietly, escorted by the armed guards.
When you entered the lobby, defeated and mentally annihilated, Namgyu immediately alerted the others of what had happened while you slowly realized you were drenched in Thanos’ blood, with no possibility to shower or change clothes. You felt sick, and while people approached as the two groups began to argue once more, you sat on Thanos’ bed, eyes empty.
Now, you really wanted out.
#male reader#m!reader#squid game#squid game x m!reader#squid game x male reader#thanos squid game#choi su bong x m!reader#choi su bong x male reader#choi su bong#choi subong x m!reader#choi subong x male reader#squid game 2
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Teach Me: The Art of Confessing (vii) - PB
Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Reader
Previous Part & Next Part
Summary: You and Paige have been best friends for the last 6 years. You trust her completely. And it is because of that trust that you ask her a rather forward question. AKA - You ask Paige to teach you.
Warnings: tiny pains, growth, this part is pretty clean
Word Count: 4.1k
Sweetbans Masterlist & Teach Me Masterlist
AN: The end is near.
It has been two weeks. Two weeks without you at home. Two weeks of Paige only seeing you at practice and even that time was limited as you were doing one-on-ones with the entire team. Two weeks of sleeping alone - if Paige can even call it sleeping, she would consider it more of tossing and turning with the occasional closing of her eyes. Two weeks of misery.
It wasn't a secret that Paige was struggling. Anyone and everyone can see something is going on. Her eyes had bags living around her eyes. She wasn't playing games in true Paige fashion, although she was still doing enough. Her conversations would be minimal and she would always deny joining in on any lives or new Tiktok videos. She was just trying to make it through the day and even that sometimes was too much.
Paige has been trying to give you space, it is killing her, but she is trying. Every night when she gets back home, she feels like your scent gets softer and softer in your absence. She enters the apartment, slings her bag in the same chair, and drags her feet to her shower.
She stands under the running water, letting the ice-cold water hit her skin like needles. She hates it but she needs to feel something. Her eyes remain closed as her mind is seared by the thought of you.
It was Paige's 18th birthday - you had it all planned out. The morning would be spent at her favorite court, followed by going to her favorite lunch spot. The night would end at your house where you would make her dinner and the two of you would have a movie night. Everything was set up perfectly.
Paige is woken up by you jumping on her bed. She didn't need to open her eyes to know it was too early to be this excited. She groans and mumbles at you to stop.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY B!" You yell and continue your childish antics.
"My birthday can start later, wanna sleep," she says as she rolls over.
"Come on, B. I have the whole day planned out and it starts by getting you out of bed." You say still standing above her. You move your feet to straddle her hips and look down at her. She turns to look up at your smiling face and can't help but feel her heart swell at the sight. You had just awoken and already had so much energy. You were looking down at her, hair still a mess and PJs scrunched and crumpled.
In one swift movement, she moves her leg to kick yours out from under you causing you to fall right on top of her. You go down with an 'oomph' and Paige lets out a groan.
"B! Are you okay?" You ask, moving off of her immediately so she can breathe.
"No," she says as she tries to refill her lungs with air. But she isn't saying no to your question, she says no to your movements.
Paige's arms wrap around you and brings you back into her. She nestles her head into the crook of your neck. Her legs come up to entangle in yours as her arms continue to squeeze you. It was all too intimate for two best friends but Paige didn't care. It was her birthday and this is what she wanted - and she knew you would give her anything she wanted.
Your hand comes to rub her back.
"Fine, you get 5 minutes but then we are getting up and getting ready, okay?" You say with the sternest voice you can conjure up.
"But it's my birthday and this is what I want," she says, her breath dancing with the hairs on your neck. Her hands play with the hem of your shirt, fingers ever-so-lightly grazing the skin above your waistband. You inhale sharply.
"But B, I have the whole day planned out," you say - trying not to sound too whiney.
She won the battle in the morning - the two of you stayed in bed for the next few hours, putting you out the door about the time you were expecting to get lunch.
The rest of the day somehow turns out exactly like you planned, even though it started hours late. You were making her dinner as your dad and Paige were talking basketball and watching some old replays of different NBA championship games.
The three of you eat dinner, the conversation never leaving basketball. After dinner, you fight Paige when doing the dishes, not wanting her to help on her birthday. It results in your dad sending both of you away before you break something.
You head into your room and put on a movie before lying next to her and passing her some candy. The two of you watched the movie, occasionally making small talk. Over the course of the movie, the two of you made it from opposite ends of the bed to lying side by side in the middle.
During the second movie, you begin nodding off. Paige moves the snacks to the side and wraps her arm around you. You don't your best friend rather curl up next to her, placing your head on her chest. You fall asleep almost immediately.
Once Paige feels your breathing steady, she brings her hand up to move some of the hair from your face and tucks it behind your ear.
"Thank you for the best birthday ever," she whispers, knowing you won't hear her. She leans over and kisses the top of your head. "You are the best and only gift I ever need."
Paige finally steps out of the shower and gets ready for bed. She lies in her bed and scrolls through her phone. She is just about to head to bed when she hears the front door open. Paige shoots to a sitting position as her heart race picks up.
You make your way into your apartment. You see the kitchen light on and know Paige is there. Your heart skips a beat. An action you used to do for her, she has been doing for you.
You make your way to your room and sigh. You are just there to get clothes and then head back to Azzi's apartment but there is something in you that has you there. The girls will be going up against Tennessee tomorrow and you know Paige hasn't been sleeping well.
Looking around, you grab what you need and throw it in your bag. As much as you don't want to be there, your miss being home.
You walk out of your room and look around the apartment. You expect it to be a mess - and some parts are, but Paige has kept it pretty clean.
You set your bag down and stand in the living room, looking at your girl's door. The internal battle in your dwindles at the thought of Paige's tired eyes in practice - they have just been growing more and more dull.
Making your way to her door, you stop. You stand there contemplating what you are about to do.
Paige is still sitting on her bed, holding her breath as she waits to see what you will do. She stands and slowly makes her way to the door. Now both of you are standing on opposite sides of the door.
Paige desperately wants to open the door and see you but she knows that it cant be her. After what feels like an eternity, the door moves.
You slowly push her door open and are surprised to see her standing right behind it. She is looking at you but quickly adverts her eyes away from you.
The first thing you notice is the smell of her shampoo, a scent you are all too familiar with.
You both stand there. You take the time to look over the girl in front of you. Her posture is hunched, eyes on the ground, and arms by her side. She looks like a little girl who just got scolded by her parents. She looks helpless and your heart breaks at the sight.
Yes, you were hurt by her actions but this was the first time in your friendship you didn't even give her the time of day to explain. You have thought over the events of that morning every day since you walked out. The more you thought about it, the more you felt like you had treated Paige unfairly. Ya, she broke the apartment rule but the hurt you felt mostly stemmed from her being with someone, and at no point had you two discussed not hooking up.
You take a step forward. Your hand comes up to grab hers. She finally looks up but you are looking past her. You guide her to her bed and lay down, moving over to your side. She doesn't question your actions and immediately lays down beside you.
You open your arms and let her cuddle into you. She is conservative with her movements. While your hand comes to rub her back, hers stays by her side. You use your free hand and bring it to wrap around you.
Neither of you says a word, just listen to the sounds of each other breathing. Before you know it you are both asleep.
Paige wakes up alone. She turns to look at the time and sees she has slept for 12 hours. Laying her head back down - she realizes that for the first time in the last two weeks, she has actually felt well rested.
You walk out of the office space and make your way to the court for game time. The girls are already warming up and ready for the game. You set your book down as you look over at the team. They look really good and you know they are ready for the game.
Your eyes make their way over to Paige, who looks better than she has all week. You smile to yourself.
"I know it's not the time, but whatever is going on between the two of you - you gotta figure it you," Geno says as he stands next to you, arms crossed.
You sigh.
"It is not doing either of you any good," he says before walking away.
Your eyes are locked on Paige, watching her every move. He was right but you don't know where to even begin.
Paige feels eyes burn into her. It is not unfamiliar to have people watching her but this felt different. She looks over at the bench and sees you looking at her.
You give her a little smile which she returns. The team comes in for the last pre-game huddle and you see Paige's mood lift.
The team takes the court and they are off. The first half is a back-and-forth. With each play we made, the other team had an even better counter.
Going in at half-time, the team is tired and on the fence. Geno comes in and does what he does best - fire everyone up. Once he is done, Paige speaks up and encourages everyone to keep working together. They are all hyped and begin making their way out to the court. The coaches follow, with you behind them all. As you are about to make your way out of the tunnel, someone grabs your arm and pulls you aside.
When you find your balance, you look up to see Paige standing right in front of you. Before you can say anything she is pulling you into her, wrapping her arms around you. You wrap your arms around her waist and just let her hug you. After a few moments, she pulls away and places a hand on your cheek.
Paige desperately wants to lean down and kiss you. She has been craving your lips on hers so deeply but doesn't move any closer. Her thumb comes up to swipe your bottom lip as her tongue swipes across her own.
Your eyes flutter close, awaiting her next move. It never comes. When you open your eyes she is gone, jogging down the tunnel to the court. Your mind is spinning and you take a second before following her. You were tired of the distance, tired of the ignoring and the fighting. As you take the floor, you decide tonight would be the night that things change.
The team fought tooth and nail until the end becoming victorious over Tennessee. The celebration is grand and you stand there taking it all in. You are beyond proud of the team.
You grab your playbook and begin to head back to the offices when some of the girls come up from behind you and begin lifting you up. It wasn't your favorite thing but you know how excited they are - it is also a testament to how much they believe you have helped them.
"Azzi, please make them put me down," you shout with a laugh as the two girls holding you go parading around.
"Just let us celebrate you this once!" She yells with a smile. To anyone watching it looked like you had just won the championship, not some mid-season game.
You laugh and soak it all in until you feel yourself lose balance and begin to lean back.
Fear pumps through your body as you brace for impact but it never comes. Instead, you are caught by Paige. Azzi takes hold of your legs and slowly places them on the ground.
"You okay, ma?" Paige says, concern evident in her voice.
You nod, not really sure what just happened but thankful you have two feet on the ground.
"Thank you," you say, fixing your shirt.
"Always," she practically whispers.
"Soooo, the team is going out, are you two in?" Olivia asks as she comes over and puts her arms around Paige and Nika.
"I think I am going to sit this one out," you say. "I have an exam I need to study for tomorrow and the last thing I need is to be hungover."
The girls try to contest but Azzi defends you. You give her a thankful look as she passes your playbook to you.
"I...I am also going to sit this one out," Paige says and your head whips around to look at her. "I need the rest."
Never over the duration of your friendship have you heard Paige decline going out after a win.
Every girl there goes to try and convince her but Azzi shuts them down real quick.
"Let Paige go, she deserves a good rest after putting up 30+ point game," Azzi says.
"That is exactly why she should go out to celebrate!" Aaliyah says.
"Guys, we can go out and have fun without Paige, trust," Azzi says as she begins to pull the group away from you and Paige.
You begin to follow when you feel your arm being tugged at once again. You stop but don't turn around. She lets go of your arm hoping you won't run.
"Please come home," she says. She doesn't say it too loud but loud enough for you to hear. Still facing the opposite direction as her, you nod and continue on your way.
After everything is put away and you have packed up for the night, you begin to make your way outside of the gym. Paige is sitting outside on the steps waiting for you. When she hears the doors open she turns around to see you and immediately stands up.
You don't say anything to her but nudge your head in the direction of your car.
Nothing is said between the two of you on your drive back. Music is playing softly in the background as you drive and she looks out the window. As tense as it has all been, sitting in the car with her is peaceful.
When the two of you get home, you jump in the shower. It had been weeks since you had showered in your own bathroom and you forgot how much you missed it. Once you are out, you put on an oversized sweatshirt and look in the mirror. You look around your room and begin moving stuff around. You hate that the first thing that comes to mind is Paige naked in your bed with some other girl. You move your bed to face a different direction and begin moving your dresser and desk to replace where your bed was. Once you are satisfied you head to the living room.
Paige is already sitting on the couch. She is fidgeting her fingers. When she hears your door open she looks at you. Her eyes are trained on you when you head to the kitchen and pour yourself a glass of water. You then make your way to the couch and sit on the opposite end.
Paige wants to move closer to you but decides against it. The two of you sit there in silence for a few minutes.
"I'm sorry," Paige finally says. You look up at her but her eyes stay trained on her hands. "I messed up and I hurt you and I am so so sorry."
She finally looks up at you and your heart breaks at the sight of her bloodshot eyes. You scoot closer to her - your knees are now touching. You can see Paige physically relax.
"I know, B. I am sorry too," you say and you can see the confusion in her eyes. You continue. "I'm sorry I asked you to teach me things that crossed a boundary. I'm sorry I expected you to know everything I was thinking and feeling when I didn't say a thing. It sucked that you brought someone home and it sucked when I came home and saw that you fucked her in my bed but what sucked the most is that I couldn't get the picture of you with someone else out of my head." You say - eyes closed, tears rolling down your face.
"Every time I close my eyes I have the image of that girl wearing my shirt, you behind her in my bed naked burned into my mind. I hear her calling you 'babe' and 'baby'. All things that I want all for myself but have been too scared to say because..."
"Because what?" Paige whispers. You open your eyes, looking into her eyes with your bloodshot own.
"Because you are Paige Bueckers. UConn basketball superstar. Walks in a room and gets all the heads to turn - girls and guys, begging for their chance to be with you. You are my best friend and I...I..."
"You what?" Paige whispers again.
"Paige, I love you."
Paige wants to tackle you right into the couch and hold you forever but you continue.
"I love you but, I don't think I can do this," you say. Looking at the girl in front of you, you see her eyebrows scrunch together. "I can't be the person that just stands by watching you go out with other girls and be okay with that anymore. I want so much more with you that just being your friend isn't enough. The thought of you with someone else sickens me, B. I shouldn't have asked you to step into any sorry of intimacy because now that I've had a taste of you - I don't think I will ever want anything else. I should have never asked in the first place - I ruined our whole friendship with a silly little ask."
It is your turn to look down at your fidgeting fingers.
"And I can't sit on the sideline anymore and watch you love someone else," your words come out unsteady as you try not to break out into a pile of sobs. Every part of your body is telling you to run before Paige can prove you right but you stay.
Your eyes are closed doing everything in your power to stay in control but it gets harder by the second. 'This is it' you tell yourself, 'this is where she gets up and leaves' - they always leave.
Paige on the other hand is trying to process everything you have just told her. There was so much in such little time, her brain and her heart were fighting for what to start with. She wants to get caught up on the fact that you said you should have never asked but easily moves past that and onto the point where you said that you love her.
Her mind is going a mile a minute - she wants to speak to every part of what you just said but can't seem to form the thoughts or words to do so. Time has passed and she knows she needs to say something - anything but she wants it to mean something. Paige knows she knows you better than yourself sometimes and it freaks her out. She loves it, but it freaks her out because she knows all the best ways to love you but with that, holds all the ways to break you apart. And that is the exact opposite of what she wants to do - ever.
Paige has known she has loved you for years. She has been in love with you. It wasn't necessarily a secret. The people who knew the two of you could see it. Azzi was the first at UConn. Paige's little brother - who Paige would need to bribe to keep his mouth shut which only turned into her parents knowing. Geno somehow found out but kept it to himself. But your dad - your dad was the first one to see Paige's love for you. He saw it freshman year of high school when the two of you were too busy hating one another. He saw how Paige, despite everything she said to you would always try and do more to get you to talk to her. He saw the mixed emotions in her eyes every time the two of you would engage. He knew the two of you would be so much more than enemies.
"You are my everything and you don't even see it," Paige says with a little laugh. If she was honest - she doesn't know if she was saying that to you or to herself.
"I've been in love with you for YEARS and could never say anything because I wouldn't survive losing you. So I shut it in and told myself being your best friend was enough. I would try and distract myself with girls but they all resembled you. Saying that out loud now sounds stupid but it was the only thing I could think of that would suppress the thoughts and feelings." Paige says shaking her head.
"Then you had that damn ask." A huff releases and Paige begins to rub her head.
"You asked me for the one thing that I so desperately wanted and I couldn't say no. And when we started, from the first kiss, I knew I was fucked. That's when I needed more distractions because I had a taste of you and it wasn't enough. I wanted more. I knew I was always going to be wanted more." Paige says. She grabs your hands and you look her in the eyes.
"I can say I'm sorry a million times but it means nothing if you don't believe that you are the only one I will ever want on this earth. You are the only one I have ever loved and will ever love."
You sit there in shock. Your mind now the one racing a mile a minute as you try to piece everything together. How did you not see this? Was it even obvious in the first place? Did other people know? Were you just oblivious to it? Regardless, you had one though.
"We are so dumb," you say.
"What?" Paige asks. "What do you mean?"
"We are so dumb." You say again. "You are so dumb."
"Wooo - hold on now," Paige is about to defend herself when you brush her off and continue.
"This all could have been avoided if you would have just spoken up and told me you loved me," you say with a smile.
"I...I - You," Paige wants to fight your statement but doesn't know where to start.
"Paige," you say in all seriousness. "Just shut up and kiss me."
If there is one thing Paige knows how to do, it is that.
"Yes, ma'am," she says and leans in.
AN: This is not the end. Let me know what you think. And as always, thank you for your love and support 💙
#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers masterlist#paige x reader#paige bueckers imagine#paige bueckers#teach me series
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like she used to (III)
alexia putellas x sister
chapter I, II
edited this in 25 minutes and now I am going to bed... but alexia debut in here today :)
~~~~~~
I sat in the back of the car as Ingrid drove Mapi and me to Johan the next morning. The car was silent, my eyes focussed out the window, hyperaware of the glances that both defenders threw back at me every so often.
Mapi is worried about me. That much I can tell, but I don't know why Ingrid, who I've barely spoken to, seems to think the world is coming to an end. She was in the room this morning when Mapi told me that Mami had called to say that she would see me there. I don't think the tension in the room was hard for the Norwegian to identify. Or it could have been Mapi's wide eyes staring at me that made her think something was wrong.
Alba is also coming to watch this game even though I told her I wouldn't be playing.
"you are part of the first team for the first time ever, hermanita! It is exciting just to watch you warm up."
I had rolled my eyes as she pulled me into a hug that day, but I appreciated it either way.
Ingrid led me to the changing rooms as Mapi made her way into the stands with some of the other injured players. My locker is beside Aitana's and she beams up at me when she spots me. I thank Ingrid quickly and make my over to Aitana and into her open arms.
"You ready?"
I nod, a smile on my face. For the first time in a long time, I do not think about my sister or what she would say, what her opinion would be. It is hard to grasp the idea that my dreams are maybe becoming a reality.
E. Putellas 29
It is a dream that I have had for a long time, to have my name on a blaugrana shirt, to be in this very position. It is something I have wanted since I could kick a ball, since I watched my sister do the same thing all those years ago.
They had asked me what name I wanted on the back of my jersey. Because Alexia just had her first name, I could take the last name without the E but Mami said to keep the E. I think she wanted me to just use my first name as well but that is for Alexia. I am only new to this, I thought.
I will not play today, Jonatan told me, but he said he wants me to be a sub in a game with lower pressure after I've spent a few games on the bench and trained with the team for more than a week.
Despite this, Mami and Alba are sat in the audience, between a bunch of relatives and family friends.
A red flush creeps onto my cheeks as I hear them all cheering when I run out of the tunnel to start the warm up. Aitana's arm is around my shoulders and she gives me an extra tight squeeze before winking at me and releasing me from her hold.
I know I will be sitting on the bench for the whole game but just warming up with the team is exciting. The cheering from the audience during the warm up is ten times louder than any crowd I've played in front of, even in the most stressful part of a match.
I try to shrug off the goosebumps that creep over my arms as I take in my surroundings. It is surreal and I think I am in a state of disbelief when Patri approaches me.
"You ok, pequena?"
"I'm good." I look at her as she places a hand on my shoulder. "This is just big."
"I get it. You are very young. You should be very proud of yourself, Elena. You a right, this is a big thing. A huge thing. We are all very proud, remember that."
She squeezes my shoulder before letting go.
"Now get to warming up, stop drifting off with the fairies!"
~~~~~~
It only took Barcelona 5 minutes to establish their dominance through an early Salma goal and by half time they were already up by 4 to 0.
The second half started and by the end of the match we were up by 8 with a decent scoreline of 9-1. Patri pulled me off the bench to go on the rounds to all the opposition and the fans. I have seen this happen so many times that it still feels surreal to be experiencing it.
"Where is your sister?"
Patri's whisper is meant to be harmless but her words are like ice water down my back and my stomach flips inside out. She continues when I shrug my shoulders.
"I saw her earlier with Olga, she's probably sat with the other injured girls."
At the mention of the girlfriend I have not met, I resist the urge to throw up, saying goodbye to Patri and heading over to where my family was in the stands.
My whole family tells me how proud they are and I think Mami takes about a thousand pictures of me and Alba and gets Alba to take some of me and her as well. I am grateful that she ignores Alexia's absence but that does not mean any of us are happy about it.
Mami is frustrated, angry maybe and that is evident in the way she scans the stadium every few minutes and shakes her head or releases disappointed sighs every once in a while.
Alba is sad and it is obvious because she makes no effort to hide the tears that brim in her eyes behind her smile. She tells me it is proud but I know when she looks longingly over to where Alexia should be standing beside me that she is just as upset as I am.
I am offended but I do my best to hide my emotions. I try to be as happy as I can because I am somewhat exhilarated from the experience despite sitting on the bench for the full 90 minutes.
Keira and Ona were being rested for the whole match and it turns out that Keira is hilarious and Ona can provide the best commentary on any match. They are a good pairing and I enjoyed making fun of Keira as she struggled to keep up with our (very slow) Spanish.
I am definitely looking forward to playing at some point. The thought makes me so incredibly nervous but I don't think there will be a better feeling than finally stepping out onto that field with my name on my back and representing my childhood club.
Mami holds me in her arms after she's satisfied with the pictures and I feel a tear drop onto my head.
"I am so proud of you, nina, you have made me proud from the day you were born and you will continue forever. This is just the start of everything. Papi is looking down on us right now with pride too, he's telling all his friends that you are his baby bear and that he taught you everything you know."
I sniffle in her arms.
"Thank you for everything you have done for me Mami, I would be nothing if not for you."
"Oh, hija, I love you."
"I love you too."
Alba throws herself into the hug and proclaims it is now a group hug. Mami chuckles and extends one of her arms around her.
"Mi hermanita is all grown up!" Alba cheers quietly so only me and Mami can hear. "15 years old and in the first team, a record?"
"Only a record when I leave the bench, Alba." I whack the back of her head with my hand and she recoils from the hug in mock annoyance.
"I should go, Mami, I'll meet you out the front?"
She nods and I kiss her cheek before wandering back to the changing rooms.
I am surprised when they are empty but the sound of the showers tells me that I will not be alone for long.
It is supposed to be a happy feeling, but I can not help but feel alone in this room, full of the belongings of people who are older than me, more experienced, skilled. People who know my sister better than I do.
People who will always look up to La Reina. Who will always hang off her every word.
I wish that was me still because if it was, I would not be alone in this locker room right now, I would be celebrating with my sister.
But she is nowhere to be found.
She didn't even say hello to me, she didn't say congratulations, she didn't even acknowledge my existence. It hurts me more than I care to admit, but maybe that is what she meant when she said I was weak.
I wipe the tears out of my eyes before they spill and it is good timing because a whole group of girls walk into the locker room at the same time that Ingrid and Frido return from their showers.
"Our pequena!" Marta cheers when she sees me in my cubby and paces over to pick me up. "You are one of us now, welcome to Barca!"
Everyone cheers and a big smile takes over my face as I am thrown amongst the group of people, being hugged and patted on the back, loud yells in Spanish bouncing round the room.
Aitana holds me for longer than everyone else and whispers her congratulations in my ear.
"You need a lift home today?"
I shake my head and smile.
"Mami and Alba are taking me out to dinner."
Aitana nods and begins talking about how exciting it is that I have finally been introduced to the first team and how I have grown up and I zone out and scan the room.
The loud chatter is a far cry from the near silence that engulfed the room five minutes ago.
I spot Mapi in the corner of the room speaking animatedly to Ingrid.
Frido is also there, laughing with Caro and Marta
Jana is beside Bruna, a giddy smile on her face as they chat to Esmee.
That can only mean one thing, Alexia is somewhere in here but I do not want to speak to her. I do not want to see her and I do not want her to see me. I excuse myself from Aitana to quickly grab my change of clothes and I go over to the showers, spending the longest possible time rinsing myself and washing my hair and an even longer time drying myself and getting changed.
I spend a humiliating amount of time in the stall but I do not hear anyone else come into the bathroom so I don't really think anyone had noticed.
If I had known what was been waiting for me when I opened the door of my stall I probably wouldn't have opened it.
Because the bleached blonde hair was the first thing I clocked, but her confidence oozed out of her as she leant against the wall, her arms crossed, her head resting against the blue paint like she was bored.
I don't say anything when I see her, trying my luck by just walking straight past her but her hand reaches out and stops me from leaving.
"No, Elena, don't run away from me."
"What do you want from me, Alexia?"
She let out an exhale and her features softened slightly. I look down at her feet, willing myself to not make eye contact.
"Why did I find out you had joined my team through a post on Instagram?"
I roll my eyes and shrug my shoulders, making an unintelligible sound that tells her that I do not know and I do not care. I try to leave again but she just stops me again.
"Why do I not know anything about you anymore? Why did Mapi find you in the middle of the park near her house last night when you should have been in bed like Mami thought?"
At least Mapi didn't say anything. I was worried, she is terrible at keeping secrets.
I just scoff because I don't know how else to react to the irony.
"Where is your girlfriend?"
She sighs.
"Olga is in the changing room with the others. You can meet her if you would like."
"I do not want to meet her."
"Then why did you ask?"
"I just wanted to confirm it wasn't just another one of Alba's rumours. You never told me."
I am proud that my voice doesn't falter, that it doesn't break. It is calm, level, despite the emotions that are raging inside of me.
"And whose fault is that?"
I roll my eyes but I avoid saying anything. She hesitated before continuing.
"We were best friends Elena, what even happened? Why did you stop talking to me, why did you start skipping our thursday night dinners?"
I scoff as she tries to make eye contact.
"I am not having this conversation now, Alexia. This is supposed to be a happy day but you are ruining it. You don't remember, that is the problem."
"I should be part of this day with you. I am your captain now."
I hold back a laugh.
"yes, captain, anything you say captain." I salute her weakly and turn around to leave, pushing past her outstretched arm.
Mapi looks at me cautiously as I walk back into the changing rooms but she is chatting with Olga and I do not want to have any interaction with her. I wave goodbye to her and Ingrid and say goodbye to a few of the others.
"What did she say?" Aitana had walked out with me and had apparently seen Alexia enter the showers earlier as well.
"That she is my captain now." I don't think I will ever forget her coldness.
"She is also your sister, Lena, she must be proud?"
If she is she has not shown it.
"She is my captain before she is my sister." My voice is monotone and I stare straight ahead of me. "Football always comes before family. It always has for Alexia."
Aitana shakes her head.
"It should not, it is not healthy."
I can't help but agree with the midfielder beside me.
~~~~~~
Dinner with Mami and Alba is nice, although I shouldn't have expected the topic of my oldest sister to be completely neglected the whole evening. Thankfully, she waits until we are all in the car driving home to bring it up.
"Your sister should have been there today, Elena." She makes eye contact with me through the rear view mirror and I look away.
"There are many things she should have done but didn't." I mumble quietly so Mami can't hear me, but Alba does and she looks back at me weirdly.
"Alexia said she was going to talk to you, she told us how proud she was and I said that you would want to hear her say it to you."
"She's... proud of me?" My voice is soft and I can see my mother's eyebrows furrow in the mirror.
"Of course she is, you are her baby sister and you have just joined her team. She was upset that you didn't tell her and I don't think she really understood why but, Lena, she was practically crying. She is a very proud big sister. I told her to come with us tonight and she seemed keen, said she would meet you in the changerooms and come out with you."
"Why does she tell you all this but when she talks to me she is so cold?" My voice is barely a whisper yet both Mami and Alba hear me loud and clear.
"She went to meet you in the dressing room, she was excited for you to meet Olga and Olga was excited as well. What did she say to you?" Mami frowns, her eyes flickering over to Alba who also had creases in her forehead.
I shrug.
"She asked me why I didn't tell her that I had joined, why she doesn't know anything about my life anymore. She said she was my captain, she should be part of my life. I think she meant my football life, not my actual one."
"What makes you say that?" Alba is the one who speaks because Mami looks devastated.
I look around dramatically. "If she wanted to be part of my actual life she would be here right now, no?"
Alba runs her hands over her face in frustration but I don't think she is frustrated at me. Just the situation. I think it has upset Alba more than anyone else and I feel guilty.
"Sorry."
"No, hermanita, this is not your fault, I just don't understand what is going through Alexia's head."
"It's ok, Alba, Mami. I don't mind. Really, I don't."
Mami just shakes her head. She is not happy and she clearly does mind.
"No, you and your sister need to sort this out, pequena, I simply cannot stand it any more. You will be home for dinner this Thursday and you will talk about it."
"But I have train-" I am interrupted.
"No you do not, you are not playing with the B team at the moment, don't be ridiculous. You will be there and we will discuss it then. We also need to discuss what we are going to do about your school."
I groan, although the change in topic is appreciated.
"Mami! I don't want to have to go back to school because I'd rather do this." She sighs and I roll my eyes.
"La Masia has made an arrangement that will allow you to continue your classes there but your days will be rearranged. You will go to training with the first team until 2, then you will go over to La Masia and do your school classes with your peers there. They will get you a tutor to study with you in the evenings when training usually is to make up for the school you missed in the morning."
Unfortunately, Mami has always been adamant that we get a good education despite mine and Alexia's obsessions with football.
I was quick to get out of the car when we arrived home, having dropped Alba off at her apartment on the way back. I went up to my room quickly, changing into my pajamas and heading to bed quite quickly.
Mami called out to tell me that she was going to see Alexia before bed, so I sat on my phone for a while, the doors locked and my lights switched off.
But my phone was plugged in and my eyes were closed when a soft fist hit my door twice. Thinking it was just mami, I called for her to enter.
But when I registered that bleach blonde hair for the second time that day, all I felt was regret.
"I am tired, Alexia. Please, just let me sleep."
"Elena, please." I hadn't noticed the tears that dripped down her face, the slump in her usual perfect posture. Her voice cracked when she said my name. "I miss you."
"Alexia. It has been a long day, I am tired, I want to sleep. Please, Alexia. Let me sleep." I am acting immature but I am tired, and I don't want to have this conversation now.
She let out a soft exhale, stepping towards me and placing a kiss on the side of my head that is exposed to the air.
I try to ignore the warm shivers it sends down my spine, it has been so long since she did that; since she did something she used to do every night.
She walks slowly back to the door, stopping as she reaches it and resting her hand on the door handle.
"Mami says you don't think I am proud of you. It is not true. I am so proud of you and I love you, pequena. But I don't think you need me anymore, I think you're fine without me. I am sorry, Elena. I am sorry for not being there for you when I should have been, but I will take a step back. I am so proud of you."
She pushed down the door handle and was gone just as quickly as she came and I resisted the urge to call out and tell her she had got it all wrong. I want her to take a step forward, she has already taken a step back. She has already taken 50 steps back.
I need her. More than anything.
But I can't rely on her. I can not be weak in front of her.
I am a Putellas. I can not be weak.
She has to be right. I am fine without her.
~~~~~~
She is still home when I walk downstairs in the morning, her eyes puffy and hair a mess as she sits on the kitchen table with a coffee. My sigh alerts her to my presence but I turn my back on her as soon as I enter the kitchen.
"Elena, please." I don't know how I changed my sister from a leader to a beggar, but today is not the day to ask when that happened.
I pour myself a bowl of cereal silently and head straight back upstairs, locking my bedroom door and eating my breakfast before sitting down on the piano stall, my fingers immediately jumping onto the keys, improvising and experimenting with new notes, chords and rhythms.
I don't know what Mami said to Alexia when she visited last night, but to be quite honest I don't want to know. I just need to keep being ok without my older sister, no matter how much I miss her. She said I should be fine without her, so I will be.
For some reason, I neglect to consider the other words she said.
"I miss you."
"I am so proud of you."
"I love you."
I think I ignore those statements because I can't seem to grasp their validity. If she missed me, she would have seen me; she would have come to my games. If she was proud of me I would already know, she would have told me like Mami had, like Alba had. Like everyone else who is proud of me has.
If she loved me... If she loved me she would be my older sister again.
I miss her, I am proud of her and I love her. It is true and I have never once doubted those emotions.
But it feels like she is just saying what she wants me to hear. What Mami said that she should say to me. I don't think she actually means it.
How could someone who loves me tell me that I am weak?
How could someone who is proud of me tell me that she doesn't want me to achieve my dreams, that she never wants to share a shirt because I am haven't had to work for it?
I don't understand how it could be true, both things at the same time.
I curse at the tear that spills out of my eye, rubbing it away aggressively and shaking my head at myself. No. I can not be weak. Not today, not ever.
My sisters words from today, from yesterday, from three years ago spin in my mind and my fingers become more and more aggressive on the keys of my piano, my song increasing in intensity; reflecting my emotions in the only way I know how. The keys are my home, the notes are my head and the song is my heart.
Though sometimes the song sounds broken, like right now when there is so much going on. So many chords, rhythms. Increasing speed, increasing volume. My fingers moving at a million miles an hour, barely hitting one key before moving to the next.
There is so much going on that it is overwhelming, so much going on that it could just explode. Into a million pieces. So many pieces that it would be futile to even try and put them back together.
It does that sometimes, and I have to fall back down to the softness and calmness of the easy rhythms, easily sailing away from the broken song like it never even existed.
But it always existed, and it's remains will always be there at the bottom of the sea, haunting me, threatening to re-emerge.
I realise I have been grieving my sister like she has died. I grieve the death of our relationship and how it has changed so quickly and so aggressively. I miss her more than anything, but the thought of what it used to be is overwhelming, it fills me with dread, with complete sadness.
Those notes that exploded so long ago, still lying dormant somewhere, never gone, never forgotten. There are so many of them, I just wish she would help me pick them up.
My song has already exploded, so I resort to playing soft chords, tears now spilling from my eyes in a continuous stream. There are too many to wipe away and I know that my eyes will be red and my cheeks puffy when I eventually do. I have lost my sister in a way that is almost impossible to comprehend.
Because Alexia isn't dead, and somehow that makes her distance so much harder to understand, so much more hurtful.
She isn't dead, she has just decided she does not want to be a part of my life any more.
The song comes to a conclusion, and my fingers rest on the keys, my eyes staring ahead at the empty stand in front of me, trying their very best to not slip upwards towards the picture that I know hangs directly above it.
The picture of me and my family the day I was born, held in Alexia's arms as Alba tried her best to share me, both of them sitting beside Mami in bed as Papi watched on with a proud smile.
I would go back to that day in an instant if I was given the opportunity.
~~~~~~
I don't go back downstairs until I hear the front door close and Alexia's car drive away. I give it a few minutes before I actually leave the safe haven that my bedroom has become, ignoring Mami's watchful eyes as I slump onto the sofa, using the remote to switch on the tv.
I only watch it for five minutes before my mother switches it off, standing by the door and looking directly at me.
"She is confused, Elena. She doesn't know why this has all happened but she is angry with herself for not being there for you more."
I roll my eyes. Of course she doesn't remember.
"Maybe she should use her brain. Maybe she should just think."
Mami shakes her head at me, it could be in frustration, maybe disappointment. I still do not look at her.
"Maybe you could just talk to her! She doesn't know how to love you when you won't let her. She wanted you to meet Olga yesterday, but you left. She wanted to speak to you last night or this morning but you ignored her."
"But Mami, it is not my fault! It should not be up to me to fix what she has broken."
"She is trying, Elena, and at the moment that is what matters. This just can not go on, you are in the same family, the same football team! Mapi spoke to me yesterday, you know. She was practically crying, Elena, it's effecting even her."
"I never should have opened my mouth to her. Now she has involved herself in something that is not her business." My voice is poisonous and my words aggressive. I know Mapi would be heartbroken if she could hear this, she always has tried so hard to do what is best. Especially when it was about me.
I love Mapi, I always have. She never thought I did because I never gravitated towards her at training when I was little, but that was just because I thought she was another sister - she was like Alexia, always around.
When I was 11, maybe, I didn't realise how upset she got about me 'not liking her', and I had made a joke about never hanging around with Mapi. It was when she left the room that Alexia pulled me to the side harshly.
"Even if you don't like her, Elena, you have to pretend! She is my best friend and she loves you so much."
I remember looking at her with my mouth agape - I love Mapi, I always did. I was confused, it was a meaningless joke - a version of a joke I made all the time to Alexia.
Alexia didn't need to tell me to go talk to her, but I didn't know what to say when I walked out the door and found her sitting down with her back to the wall, tears pouring down her face. I explained everything and she apologised for being dramatic.
Since then, we have gotten along well and I have tried to spend time with her when I can.
It has been harder in the last couple years when I have fallen out with Alexia. They are best friends, I don't want to get in the way of that.
Mami's anger brings me right back to reality.
"That is enough, Elena! Maria only wants to help, but she can't, nobody can do anything except you and Alexia."
I resist rolling my eyes, instead releasing a huff of air.
"I'll think about it."
My arms are folded and I turn back towards the blank screen, ignoring the way Mami sighs and walks away.
It is only when I hear her door close that I let my angry facade crumble, my body shaking as I resist the tears.
I need to stop crying.
Alexia thinks I am strong enough to do everything by myself.
I need to prove to her that I can.
Maybe then she will tell me she is proud of me.
~~~~~~
this is pretty much all the prewritten stuff i have, will write more soon once my exams are done
let me know if there's anything you want to see in the next parts
part IV
#woso fanfics#woso#woso imagine#alexia putellas#alexia putellas x reader#putellas reader#fcb femení#barca femeni
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control alt + love
36. ANVK's princess wc: 1656
you sat playing with the hem of your skirt, eyes never leaving the screen. you did not want to admit but watching heeseung play was making you nervous. he knew your moves, of course he did, he taught you everything you know. you almost mimicked his moves in your gameplay and you were scared that would be your downfall. you watched as the game came to an end, as gxxn destroyed the other team's base.
you feel hands on your shoulders, and glancing above you see seungmin nodding for you to come meet the team. he waits for you to walk around the table following after you as you both make your way to the team huddle.
“well, team we finally made it, to the competition we've been training in this season. zb1 is a newer developing team but don’t discredit them, they are here for a reason. we studied their movement and then we studied their dynamics. then did it once more for fun. if we keep to the game plan we have, we can win.” chan goes on pulling out a board of the map and going over the game plan.
you didn’t realize you were zoning out, till seungmin started rubbing your back, trying to get you to calm down. he gives you a small smile, you let out a breath going back to listening to chan.
“anything you wish to say, captain.”
“i trust you guys. don’t let me down,” he says, clapping a hand on jeongin’s shoulder and then walking towards the door. “let's go, they are waiting for us.”
“some speech,” jeongin says, following suit. you follow after them nerves getting the best of you. rushing up to catch up to seungmin, pulling on his arm.
“i have to use the bathroom. do i have time?” you hear laughing reach around you as the guys continue ahead.
seugnmin reaches out patting your head, “yeah but hurry you remember where to go right.”
“yep. i'll be back quick.” you reach up planting a quick kiss on his lips rushing off to the nearest bathroom.
seungmin was starting to worry about how long you were taking. glancing back at the tunnel waiting for you to walk through it.
“do you think she’s okay?”
“seungmin dude, it's only been 5 minutes. you should know by now how long girls take to use the bathroom.” changbin says, stretching his arms.
“i guess you are right; it's just that there are a bunch of men here, and she's only a li—” seungmin is interrupted by the sound of your rushed footsteps echoing. when you reach them, your hands fall to your knees, and you try to catch your breath.
“where have you been, young lady? we have been worried sick. and by ‘we’, i mean seungmin.” changbin rolls his eyes as he watches seungmin kneel, looking up at you to ensure you are okay.
“uh, yeah i'm okay. long line.” you rush out before seungmin can question why there would be a line as you were the only girl player here.
“let’s give it up for anvk!” the announcer calls out, changbin leads the line followed by, minho, jisung, jeongin, seungmin then you. the bright lights blinded you as you walked out from under the tunnel. your ears ring with the loud cheers of the fans. you continue to walk down the path, seeing signs with your name. you make eye contact with a group of girls, who squeal when you give them a wave.
you take your spot in the middle, to your left is seungmin, and to your right is jisung. you and jisung share a look only for him to reach out and shove your head away. you giggle placing the headset on. hearing the guys on the other side.
“who would have thought anvk’s princess would have so many fans?” minho said looking out above the console and reading the signs ahead.
“right? changbin you must be so proud.” you spoke into the mic, as you watched the home screen light to life, on the takken game.
“i knew you guys thought i was the princess. thank you.” he says batting his eyelashes at you guys on his right.
before you guys could continue your conversation, the announcer stops you guys, “hello and welcome to the second game of the 2024 takken arena championships, i’m kim jongin and this is my co-host byun baekhyun. we will be with you today for the remaining games. mr. byun would you like to say something.” jongin looks over at baekhyun.
“i’m excited for this match-up! zb1 is a newer group and to be able to make it to the championships is remarkable in itself. and as for anvk, we already know that their midsolo is a girl. that's all anyone can talk about.”
“yes but that girl is extremely talented, she's quite impressive, watching her play always leaves me wanting more.” jongin says laughing into the mic.
“careful, that girl is dating the kim seungmin, leader of anvk and the top player of takken. so you better pay nice, mr. kim.
as the announcers continued to laugh giving the latest updates and stats about both sides, both teams were picking players and the match was off.
“it's coming down to the last tower before anvk completely takes over zb1s tower. this was fairly a quick game. it seems anvk is taking a very aggressive approach.” baekhyun says going over some points.
“what i think is fascinating is that usually the midsolo or top lane holds the position of power but this time they put all their power in the bottom lane almost like they are trying to subdue zb1s hanbin. and if i am being frank it's a smart move.”
“oh shit, i mean crap i can't curse but anvk has reached zb1s tower and is on their way to taking the game! this was an amazing gameplay that anvk has portrayed and it makes me wonder what other tricks they have up their sleeves.” jongin looks down to watch as anvk gets up to shake hands with zb1 and go to the front and wave out to the crowd.
“well this will take us to miss cho miyeon with exclusive interviews with team anvk. this has been kim jongin and..”
“byun baekhyun.”
“and we will see you for the next game of atzz vs epex!”
jeongin rushed out of the line stating he had to shit, and during the whole game, he had to shit. it was one of the reasons y’all had to push so aggressively because he was gonna shit his pants. you laugh as he rushes out ahead of you as seungmin makes his way to the interview center.
“im taking over for the kid, ill be in the room after and we can watch the svt game down in the player section okay?” he tells you as you nod your head. “grab something to snack on as well, we won't be able to eat till after we play bnd.” he plants a kiss on your temple then goes down to capture your lips in his.
you both separate as you make your way to your dressing room. when you open the door, you notice there are way more people in there than your team. all heads turn to you as you see your friends from back home. “great job kicking butt baby.” julie says rushing up to give her a hug followed by yunjin and yuna. you all laugh and chat over each other mostly about how cool you looked playing and then going down to when they got in.
“wait where’s hyunjin?” you say looking around to see he wasn’t in there.
“he said he was going to the bathroom,” yuna says shrugging her shoulders.
“he has been out for a while, did he fall in?” julie says. “ill go look for him.”
“oh me too,” you say following her out, grabbing onto her hand and leaning into her. “i missed you guys. this way if i remember correctly” you lead her toward the bathroom just as dk walks out.
“yo y/n hey! woah who is that?” he says rushing up to you both taking in julie. he extends a hand “im dk.”
“and im not interested.”
you watch as dk rolls his eyes turning his head back to you “are you gonna watch us?” he gives you his best puppy eyes. you laugh nodding your head.
“yeah, we are after this, was there anyone else in there?”
“nope just me, which is surprising.”
“was jeongin not in there either?” you ask starting to get worried that he has been gone for a while now.
“nope like i said nobody was in there.” you give him a smile murmuring thanks, before separating.
“lets try the second floor, the stairs are this way.” you pull julie to the stairs, and as you push open, you see two guys in the corner of the stairwell, when they hear the door open they pull apart turning to face you both.
“hyunjin?” julie says mouth agape.
“jeongin? were you guys kissing?” you shout out your face pulling the same expression as julies. you didn’t even wait for an answer as you turned around heading back to the room. you could hear the sound of julie laughing and the embarrassed tone of hyunjin. you also ignored the calls of your name continuing not bothering to respond.
seungmin was walking to the door at the same time as he saw you followed by a worried-looking jeongin. you quickly wrapped your arms around him hiding your face in the crook of his neck, as seungmin watches jeongin look like he has a tail between his legs. and before he could ask what was wrong he saw a red-looking hyunjin followed by julie who was making kissing noises at him. he put the pieces together.
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authors note: i fear yall do NAWT want to know how many chapters are left...
tags: @onlyhyunjin @chenlesfavorite @hippopotamusdreamer @vegetablesarefuntables @soondoongdoriii @jeonginplsholdmyhand @nappynapnaps @sincerely-sun @staytinyluv @kimseungminpabo @seungzsmin @sweetasmarie @hinanitiram @tricky-ritz @ayyonoona @hanniemylovelyquokka @toplinehyunjin @missystay @binniesbabe @tirena1 @jihoons-kitten @skz-ot8-stay @darlingz99 @khandzilla @icouldntcareless22 @rihaee @thatshroomiegirl @sillyhal @livixcore @dazzlingjade @h0rnyp0t @drewsandsebastianswife @jabmastersupriseee @flaminghotyourmom @velvetmoonlght @mihoonz @jazziwritesthings @thisrandombitch @vixensss @galbiirocher @skzstannie @babrieeee @ladybeautiful18 @hyeon-yi @lknosemole @night-storm7 @spearbinnie0327 @goldenmellow @jisungs-iced-americano @charlieg1rl @skysole @seungminsteddybear @sskzlover @abbiestearsricochet @isaenme @dreamerwasfound @ihrtlix
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CHOSOIST KINKTOBER GAMING PLAYLIST — WEEK 1
( DEMON TIME) 🎮 INCUBUS!SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY X READER
— game synopsis: your boyfriend has been quite neglectful when it comes to your needs. not particularly being the best book boyfriend similar to the books you've read. but the one demon that visits you in your dreams seem to give you everything you need.
( cw ) ⸻ fem reader, female anatomy described, mentions of reader having a boyfriend, doggystyle, unprotected sex, dirty talk (simon calls reader a slut), mentions of wet dreams, pillow humping, infidelity, kinda monsterfucking, mentions of simon having horns, gaslighting, i changed the ending like 5 times omg
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ kinktober masterlist / previous playthrough
You planned the whole night out for you and your boyfriend—a Halloween tradition that you two always did every year. Binge-watch some Halloween movies, give out candy to children who knocked on your shared apartment door, and have wonderful sex as Jason Vorhees kills his next victim playing in the background. But tonight, you sat alone on the cream-colored sofa with a half bowl of candy (because trick-and-treaters didn’t stop coming despite your boyfriend did). You felt embarrassed, the running thought that you should have let this relationship go sooner flashing through your mind similar to a light bulb flickering on when someone has a wonderful idea.
You were grasping onto a dead relationship and yearning for a happy ever after that wasn’t even there. You turned the television off and decided to clean up for the evening. Putting away the snacks you laid out and the pizza that grew cold as minutes went by. Pure disappointment sat at the pit of your stomach while cleaning up and eventually finding yourself in bed a little earlier than usual. You quickly did your evening routine of skincare and brushing your teeth before letting your feet guide you to your bed. The sound of late-night partygoers was heard outside and you can only tune out the squeals of excitement as you drift off into a deep slumber.
But as your body finally fell into the comfort of getting some rest, you soon felt your body jerk up suddenly at the sound of your wooden floors creaking. You wanted to be excited that your boyfriend actually came home and maybe you could do the activities you had planned. Expecting to see him tugging off his button-down shirt and complaining about his supervisor being up his ass during the eight-hour work shift—but instead, you were met with a large figure staring at you. His burly arms crossed over his chest causing the tight black t-shirt to clench upon his upper body. You blinked a couple of times assuming you were dreaming. You even reached to your wrist to pop at the beaded bracelet your boyfriend got you at this carnival you guys went to. The beads sting your wrist after you do that action and you still don’t jolt up in a completely cold sweat.
“You’re not dreaming, love.” His deep voice erupted your thoughts that were racing with questions. “Actually, kinda in the middle. Not dreaming, but actually dreaming. Hard to explain,” He points out before tilting his head at you.
Now you wanted to scream. A large man with a black mask that had a skull imprinted on it was standing just inches away from your bed and your body shook with fear as you inched away from him but was met with your cream-colored headboard.
“It’s no need to panic, you summoned me here. Well, kinda.” He explains. “Fuck.” He utters before clearing his throat and trying again.
“Every Halloween, some lonely single person's guilt and hurt is so strong that it summons me or one of my peers. A mere incubus that they can have for just one night,” The masked man explained, and when he saw you look at him as if he’s grown an extra pair of arms (which he could do if he put his mind to it, he was fuckin’ demon after all). “You’re actually the first person I’ve been assigned to in a while.”
“I’m so fucking confused right now.” You swing your feet over the ledge of your bed, sliding into your slippers, and walking over to the mysterious man. When you got closer, you immediately poked at his arm and were met with hardness.
He was real. He wasn’t like some ghost and maybe you had gone crazy.
“But I’m not single…” you pointed out as you circled around his large frame to get a good look at him. If he wasn’t a ghost, he still was here, and if anything went to shit to the point that you had to call the cops—at least you had a visual of his stature.
You couldn’t tell if his face scrunched up in a confused manner, but his eyes told the rather confused feeling he possessed. You stood in front of him crossing your arms over your chest. “I’m actually taken…” Your voice trails off and for some reason saying that left a bad taste in your mouth.
It didn’t feel like you were taken. Especially when you went to sleep alone tonight.
“Hm, that’s interesting. It doesn’t seem like that. So if you’re not taken…you’re hurt. Did the little boyfriend and yourself have an argument?” The stranger waltzed over to the small loveseat in your room and sat down. It was as if he was a therapist questioning you about life.
“No.” You quickly admit. “We didn’t…he just didn’t show up tonight when I planned something for us. He hasn’t answered his phone, nothing. So, I’m just confused about what I should do because this has happened before.”
“I see.” His voice trails off and he rubs at his clothed chin before standing up. “Let’s go have some fun, love.” The mysterious man whose eyes you were hypnotized with extended his large hand for you to take.
“What? I’m still in my pajamas.” You pointed it out. “I need to go change, maybe fix my hair.” You motion to the silk scarf that was tied upon your head.
“Eh, don’t worry about that. I’m a fuckin’ demon. I have it all figured out.” He says.
You met his gaze and you saw this twinkle in his light-colored eyes. It was a similar twinkle and glint that your boyfriend had when you two were in your cupcake phase during the relationship. “What’s your name? I can’t just go out with a stranger that claims he’s a demon.”
You heard him kiss his teeth, “You’ll figure it out soon.” And with that, he grabs your hand and in a blink of a moment, you’re both in a crowded bar.
You knew exactly what bar you were at because it was one that your boyfriend frequented a lot with his friends and co-workers. You had to pick him up countless times when his alcohol intake had hit its limit. But as you stood in the middle of the bar, you noticed that no one didn’t notice you. A person walked by you and you were expecting to feel their shoulder roughly bump into you—but instead, their body went through yours as if you merely were a ghost. No one in this bar knew you two were here, which sucked considering your attire.
Your hands roamed your body as you wore a blood-red leather corset and a black leather mini-skirt that hugged your lower half perfectly. On your head was a headband that was decorated with two sparkly red devil horns. Of course, he would ensure you were dressed up as a demon. Your eyes searched in the crowd for him and you saw him behind the bar looking at the massive choice of alcohol. You walked towards the bar and watched him closely, “Why are we here?” You asked.
“To have a good time.” The man’s fingers tapped at his masked face before grabbing a random bottle and some shot glasses. “So, drink this and let loose.”
You took the shot off the bar and drank it quickly just in time to hear a loud cheer from the back of the bar. Your head turns to follow the commotion of people dressed up for Halloween while playing what seems to be an intense game of pool. When you saw the familiar figure with a football jersey on, your heart sank immediately. There your boyfriend was playing pool with a huge grin on his face while his friends cheered him on. The shot you took, immediately helped your stomach form the most horrendous knots and you wanted to go home.
“No.” The demon behind the bar said before filling your shot glass up again.
“You don’t even know what I’m going to say.” Your eyes stared at the liquor in your glass and you then watched him lift the mask just a bit so he could down his own shot. “You brought me here on purpose.” Your eyes narrow at him.
“I did. To see that you’re all sad for that.” His fingers motion to your boyfriend. “He has seen your text messages by the way and five missed calls.” He adds and you didn’t even want to question him he knew that you had blown up your boyfriend’s phone.
“It’s really no point to be here. I’ll just talk to him when I get home.” You adjusted the headband on your head. “So, can you please teleport me back home Mr. Demon?”
“No.” He adds before walking around the bar so that he is sitting on the barstool next to you. His large callous hands grab the end of the stool you were comfortably sitting in and bring it closer to him. “We’re going to make your lovely boyfriend so paranoid that he’ll be groveling at your feet.”
“And how the hell are we going to do that if he can’t see us?” Your eyes met with the mysterious demon and you felt hot under his gaze. Maybe it was because you couldn’t see his face and since it was Halloween, no one was going to question why he wore a mask.
“Who said he can’t see us?” His head tilts just a bit before he snaps his finger and suddenly when he snaps his finger and moves your stool just a bit—your boyfriend glances in your direction quickly. So quickly he did a double take at how close you were with the demon who popped up in your life this evening.
Your boyfriend’s eyes enlarged at the sight of you and what you were wearing and soon the demon snaps his fingers again. You watched as your boyfriend still glanced in your direction, but it was as if he simply was imagining things. He shook his head and went back to sipping his alcohol.
“He’s going to lose his mind by the end of the night.” The demon adds with confidence oozing from his tone.
“I guess, this will work. But, I must ask. Why’d the mask? Also, where are your horns? Don’t demons have horns?” You took it upon yourself to take the cocktail that the bartender just put on the bar since no one could see you two.
“I do have horns, just think the horns give everyone a good spook.” He points out. “Last time, a lady threw a glass at me. So, I settled with the mask and no horns.” He takes a sip from the beer bottle that the bartender sat in front of a talking customer next to him.
“Hm,” was the only thing you said. “Are you ugly? A lot of horror stories perceive demons as ugly.”
“Quite the opposite.” He backfires. “Can’t really haunt people's dreams to have sex with them and solve their problems if we’re ugly.” He jokes.
“Then can I see your face?” You asked, your fingers twirling the straw in your cocktail and you gave him a grin.
“After you stop being so uptight and help me…help you.” He finishes his beer and he stands up motioning for you to follow.
With a quickness, you’re downing your cocktail and following the man in the crowd. The music was so loud that you had to practically yell out anything you wanted him to hear. “What about your name? Do you have a name?”
“Simon, or Ghost. Whichever you prefer.” He walks over to the pool table, and leans against the pool table adjacent to the one your boyfriend and his friends were at.
You watched as some random woman dressed as a cheerleader placed her arms around your boyfriend's waist as he was trying to hit the pool ball. You felt jealousy, anger, and betrayal seeing this. He ditched your plans to be out with her. That douche.
“Don’t have such a down face.” Simon nudges your side before grabbing the pool table. “Like I said, we are going to make him lose his mind by the end of the night.” He grabs a hold of your waist after grabbing a pool stick. “Just go with the flow, love.” He whispered in your ear and you felt your skin decorated with goosebumps.
Simon helped guide your hand towards breaking the balls in the middle of the table. Despite the bar being fairly cool, you felt hot with how close he was to you. His crotch pressing against the fatness of your butt in the skin-tight mini skirt. His breath itching at the shell of your ear. Just as you are about to hit the ball, he snaps his fingers again making you two noticeable in the crowd of people. The sound of wolf whistles could be heard seeing your figure bent over—if Simon wasn’t here, strangers would have been to see what your momma gave you. There as Simon helps you break the group of balls perfectly, you squeal in excitement gaining the attention of your boyfriend’s friend and soon your boyfriend again. His face goes red at the sight of Simon’s hands all on you and you watch as he scrambles to remove the pretty woman off him. He made his way to the pool table, but Simon snapped his fingers again causing your boyfriend to be confused once again. Your eyes scan over his face while he shakes his head and mumbles something under his breath.
“And now he’s going to call you. But you’re going to ignore his call because that’s exactly what he’s been doing to you.” Simon leans against the pool table and the two of you watch as your boyfriend pulls out his phone to call you.
You were astonished at what you were viewing, he was panicking. The mere thought of you being with another man had him about to explode. You watch as your boyfriend runs his fingers through his hair, a thing he does when he’s overthinking his ass off. You knew for a fact that he was overthinking the fact that you were probably out having just as much fun as him.
“So, Simon. Do you have sex with all the women whose lives and dreams you hop into?”
“Not all of them. Some just want someone to talk to.” He shrugs. “You on the other hand just need someone to teach your nitwit of a boyfriend to appreciate what he has.” He adds.
“So, you wouldn’t have sex with me? Just put my boyfriend in check.” You playfully nudged his side and you were met with hardness.
“Do you want to have sex with me?” His eyes met yours and you were forced to swallow the large lump in your throat. “Because I may have known your boyfriend is an idiot, but I also know he hasn’t touched you in weeks…a month and a half to be exact.” He adds as he turns to face you. This time, he’s caging you from leaving since you were still resting on the pool table.
“I could have gone the sex route, but that wouldn’t solve your shitty boyfriend situation which would mean I would be stuck with you until you’re no longer miserable.” He says. “But, you and I know that you’re a good girl.” His hand adjusts the red devil horn headband on your head. “You wouldn’t cheat on him, even though..he’s probably going to cheat on you with her.” He motions to the brunette cheerleader who is still by your boyfriend's side even as he is attempting to call your phone.
“You don’t know me, Simon.” You pointed it out. “Only what you observe about my life.”
“Then do you want to prove me wrong, love?” His hand rests on your waist tugging you closer to him.
“I’m sure that’s what you’ll want.”
“It is, I’m not going to deny it. But, I’m not going to force it out of you. You’re a grown woman, use your words and make your own decision.” He drops his hands from your waist and walks away from you, disappearing in the crowd and towards the bathroom.
Like the touch-deprived woman you were, you followed before him. But just as you were walking to follow him in the bathroom, you bumped into your boyfriend. You expected your body to go right through his since Simon did snap his fingers, but you collided with your boyfriend’s shoulder gaining his attention. When he saw you, that look of shock appeared again and his lips parted to speak, but just as his hands reached out for you—your boyfriend's confused expression returned and his hand that went to grab at you, went right through you. You started to feel bad, but as you walked further away—seeing the woman clutch on your boyfriend made all the guilt that was bubbling inside of you burst.
You walked into the bathroom and it was filled with many girls fixing their makeup and drunkenly complimenting each other. Bit by bit they scattered out the bathroom when they heard some generic pop song come on. Simon was leaning against the pink-colored tile walls waiting.
“So, you’ve made your decision?” He asked with his arms crossed over his shoulders.
“I wouldn’t be in here if I didn’t.”
Simon chuckles at your words before he brings his hands to the fabric of the black mask. You were preparing yourself for what you were about to see. You knew he was attractive behind the mask, his whole demeanor screamed it. The way he carried himself. His confidence. You can go on and still be naming many other attributes.
He pulls the mask out and you have to catch yourself from letting your jaw drop. Despite his face being decorated with scars, you had questions about—he still looked like he could have the face of an angel. His dirty blonde colored strands were ruffled due to the mask and his eyes—you’d stared upon them all night but finally putting a face to them made your knees go weak.
You walked closer towards him, “Will they see us?” You asked as you glanced back at the door.
“Only if you want.” He closes the gap between you two.
You mentally were weighing out the pros and cons of this. Frankly, the pros benefit you much more than the cons. So you took that leap and kissed Simon immediately. The sound of the bathroom door swung open, and someone walked in to grab a paper towel. Because of Simon and his silly demon powers, they didn’t even know you two were there. The drunken stranger walked right through you and Simon as you were making out. His hands roamed your body as if you were a precious gem he had just found. Your body attempted to guide him into one of the stalls, but he didn’t budge. You weren’t sure if it was because he had other plans in mind or if it was because of his huge stature.
“It’s not like anyone could see us.” Simon's words mumble against your skin as he places kisses on your neck. His body guides you towards the bathroom sink before he twirls you around.
You were forced to stare at yourself in the mirror at your reflection. The clear lip gloss that formerly stained your lips was smudged across your face. Your eyes were glossy of anticipation and need for a demon you had just met. The feeling of his bulge pressing against your butt causes you to close your eyes and inhale sharply.
“That’s true, but—one mere snap could make them see us.” You spoke out.
“They’ll be too intoxicated to notice.” His eyes met yours in the mirror before he rolled the skirt that left practically nothing for imagination up around your waist. The coolness of the bathroom causes your skin to be garnished with little goosebumps and your hair to stand up on your limbs, you clutch upon the porcelain sink.
You only hum at Simon’s words while he pulls your panties to the side and begins to line himself to insert you after removing his cock from his bottoms. The tip of his cock rubs against your wet folds collecting the essence that stains the inside of your thighs. Each push forward into your pussy, the grip on your waist grew tighter. The sound of his cries of pleasure was like music to your ears. Completely distracting you from the fact that his cock was stretching you out bit by bit.
“Just give me the go and I’ll keep going, love.” He professes. His eyes once more meeting yours and seeing the way your lips part apart to let out a broken moan, gave him the answer he ached to hear. His hips push forward being met with the cushion of your ass and he just wondered with not being touched in so long, how do you like to be fucked.
“How’d you want, Y/N?” Simon questions, his hips rolling in a slow and sensational way causing you to moan some more. “Slow.” He adds before pulling himself fully out of your cunt. “Or.” His voice trails off as he’s lining himself back up to slam inside your addicting pussy again. “Hard.”
Your brain couldn’t comprehend his question quickly enough because he soon gave you a mixture of both. Slow strokes to have you crying out his name as if the people entering and exiting the bathroom could hear you. Fast and hard strokes to have your breath hitch in your throat and for you to hold onto the surface tighter.
The vulgar sound of skin slapping against each other begins to ring in your ears like a sweet jazz tune. Your hand reaches back behind you to slow down Simon’s movement, but he swats your hand away as if it were a mere inconvenience to him. Simon lifts the shirt he wore to bring it up to his mouth. Despite the two of your bodies already crossing a boundary, he needed you to be closer. His teeth held up the ends of his shirt as he thrust forward inside you. Simon has pleasured many people in the world, but nothing was like this. No one has ever clutched around his hardened cock like this. Sweat beads form on his forehead and he felt completely pussy drunk for you.
Your knees were growing weak but, Simon assured you that you don’t fall. With each stroke and thrust, he held you closer to make sure his motion didn’t get interrupted. Tears decorate your lashline causing your mascara to smudge.
“Fuck.” You moaned out. “I’m so clos-” Your words were interrupted by the bathroom door swinging open and your boyfriend walked in making out with the brunette who seemed to be attached by his hip all evening.
“Don’t pay attention to him, only me.” His fingers coil into your hair tugging you up so that your back is pressed against his chest. His eyes never broke eye contact with you in the mirror. “It’s just me and you in here, right?” He questions as he thrusts inside of you.
Your eyes averted to your boyfriend as he was making out with the girl, but he broke the kiss quickly. “I just need to call her, ensure she’s okay. She hasn’t answered my calls and that’s not like her.”
“Hmm, wonder what she’s doing.” Simon teasingly whispers in your ear. “Is she home watching her silly little Halloween movies or is she getting fucked like a slut in a bathroom?” With each word, he thrusts inside you.
“She’s probably just sleeping.” The brunette pecks your boyfriend’s lips. “Or getting fucked.” She jokes and your boyfriend pushes her away.
“That’s not funny.” He says before he tries to leave the bathroom and through the sound of your heated flesh slapping against Simon’s toned thighs, his finger snaps just in time for your boyfriend to see a glimpse of his pretty girlfriend (who he assumed was home) getting fucked a stranger he didn’t know.
Your boyfriend’s eyes enlarged at the sight but before he could fully react, Simon snapped his fingers once more causing the two of you to be merely an illusion once more. Your boyfriend ran his hand over his face finally coming to terms that he had to get out of here. He had to ensure that you were home right where he assumed you were. As Simon continued to fuck you until you were seeing stars, your paranoid boyfriend rushed out of the bathroom calling your phone that was still home. Each second, your phone went to voice mail causing your boyfriend to spiral even more at the thought that a handsome stranger had you bent over in the bar he frequently goes to.
“And my work here is done, love. Sweets dreams.” Simon kisses the side of your temple just in time for you to finally orgasm all over his cock—but eventually, jolt up in your bedroom in a cold sweat and your panties soaked.
Instantly, your hands run over your body where Simon formerly touched. Your fingertips dance upon your lips that he once kissed trying to process everything that just happened. He did say you were dreaming, but it felt so real. The demon costume hugging your body like a latex glove felt real. Simon’s cock being inside you felt real.
But your suspicions were deemed true as your boyfriend burst through the room in a panic. Sweat droplets embellish his forehead as if he ran all the way home to you.
“Y/N, did you go out tonight?” Your boyfriend asked.
With false confusion plastered on your face, you blinked a couple of times.
“No, is everything okay? Maybe you’re being just a bit paranoid, babe.”
And in his own realm which was the home of incubus demons around the world, Simon viewed the conversation unfold with a smirk.
“That’s my girl.”
⸻ TAGS // @syndrlla97 @leoyayzies @salaciousdoll @xintothewoodswegox @bxrbie1 @lilvampirina @wiinterz @dvafoxxystrashcan
#simon riley x reader#simon riley smut#cod x reader#cod smut#call of duty smut#ghost smut#ghost x reader#female reader#call of duty x reader#video game x reader#angelshubnetwork#chosoistkinktober23#⊹˳⁺ ♡ 𝒻𝒶𝓃𝒻𝒾𝒸𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝒸𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈
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The modder argument is a fallacy.
We've all heard the argument, "a modder did it in a day, why does Mojang take a year?"
Hi, in case you don't know me, I'm a Minecraft modder. I'm the lead developer for the Sweet Berry Collective, a small modding team focused on quality mods.
I've been working on a mod, Wandering Wizardry, for about a year now, and I only have the amount of new content equivalent to 1/3 of an update.
Quality content takes time.
Anyone who does anything creative will agree with me. You need to make the code, the art, the models, all of which takes time.
One of the biggest bottlenecks in anything creative is the flow of ideas. If you have a lot of conflicting ideas you throw together super quickly, they'll all clash with each other, and nothing will feel coherent.
If you instead try to come up with ideas that fit with other parts of the content, you'll quickly run out and get stuck on what to add.
Modders don't need to follow Mojang's standards.
Mojang has a lot of standards on the type of content that's allowed to be in the game. Modders don't need to follow these.
A modder can implement a small feature in 5 minutes disregarding the rest of the game and how it fits in with that.
Mojang has to make sure it works on both Java and Bedrock, make sure it fits with other similar features, make sure it doesn't break progression, and listen to the whole community on that feature.
Mojang can't just buy out mods.
Almost every mod depends on external code that Mojang doesn't have the right to use. Forge, Fabric API, and Quilt Standard Libraries, all are unusable in base Minecraft, as well as the dozens of community maintained libraries for mods.
If Mojang were to buy a mod to implement it in the game, they'd need to partially or fully reimplement it to be compatible with the rest of the codebase.
Mojang does have tendencies of *hiring* modders, but that's different than outright buying mods.
Conclusion
Stop weaponizing us against Mojang. I can speak for almost the whole modding community when I say we don't like it.
Please reblog so more people can see this, and to put an end to the modder argument.
#minecraft#minecraft modding#minecraft mods#moddedminecraft#modded minecraft#mob vote#minecraft mob vote#minecraft live#minecraft live 2023#content creation#programming#java#c++#minecraft bedrock#minecraft community#minecraft modding community#forge#fabric#quilt#curseforge#modrinth
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Louie isn’t evil.
Or: what Pikmin 4 tells us about his character.
BIG WARNING FOR PIKMIN 4 SPOILERS! (and the rest of the series)
———
I want to preface this by saying that I am in no way trying to be the end-all, be-all of character interpretations, but Pikmin 4 to me, at least, confirms the suspicions I’ve had since playing Pikmin 2 and 3 all those years ago that Louie ISN’T secretly evil, or possessed, or whatever else. He’s just… Louie. And I think that’s interesting in and of itself.
1. Olimar himself vouches for him, and clearly doesn’t think he’s a bad person.
Say what you will, but I’m inclined to think Olimar is a decent judge of character. Clearly he’s worked with Louie for enough time to see that while he’s not very good at his job, he’s not intentionally so— at least not in a malevolent way (will get more into this later). He also wants you to forgive him for Olimar’s sake, which can be read as self-sacrificing (as Olimar is known to be) but I also think hints at the soft spot he has for Louie.
It's also worth noting that he states during a end-of-day conversation that he told Louie that, since he's a new employee, he should do everything Olimar does... including throw castaways into the onion. Interesting that Louie took this so literally, but it does provide an explanation for why he kidnapped the Koppaites beyond "he's evil and crazy".
2. He really, REALLY loves his grandma.
Like, wow. He talks about her SO MUCH both in his Piklopedia entries and also elsewhere in the game. It's interesting. Worth noting is that he never mentions any other family members- unlike Olimar, who talks about his wife and each of his children independently. I've said this before, but the content of a lot of these entries implies to me that Louie was mainly raised by his grandma, likely since birth. And given some of her emails in Pikmin 2, assuming they're also canon to Pikmin 4's timeline... Well, Louie certainly had an interesting upbringing. But he clearly loves her all the same.
3. He has a mischievous streak and tends to do things on impulse.
This was already fairly obvious from the previous games, but I think it's worth noting that this game confirms that he's... would immature be the right word? In any regard, he doesn't seem to see himself as a "grown-up"- when in all likelihood he is. Personally, as a 22-year-old, I find that pretty relatable as I often think of myself as younger when in reality I am by all definitions an adult. This, along with his grandma still being around, makes it pretty much certain that Louie is a lot younger than Olimar and the president, likely in his early to mid twenties. Being a bit of a goofball isn't really out of the ordinary, all things considered.
THAT BEING SAID, he's clearly capable of practicing self-restraint when he wants to. What he says here about the red Pikmin is pretty significant, since we know he's willing to eat just about anything- but clearly he has some reservations about creatures that are friendly and helpful. Which leads to...
4. He loves dogs and fluffy things.
Same. But he doesn't even consider eating Moss, Oatchi or the Ancient Sirehound, showing that his creature-eating habits stop at things he recognizes as useful. He clearly also holds affection for things that are soft and fuzzy, and says as much.
5. He is so autism.
He plays with fidget toys. He loves certain textures and sounds. This guy is stimming all over PNF-404!!! I think this also lends some explanation for why his behavior is what it is- things like taking Olimar's suggestion to do as he does super literally even after crashing on an alien planet, his hyperfixation on cooking and tendency not to communicate and incorrectly interpret situations (thinking the Koppaites are kidnappers in 3, running away from you in 4). He could even be low or no empathy as well, explaining why it takes a hot minute to get him to understand why people are upset with him about something.
Interestingly this game also makes it clear that Louie wants to live on the planet, or at least thought he did while you were chasing him down, which makes a lot of sense when you consider that he doesn't really seem to fit in back on Hocotate. I, too, wish to run away to an alien world with all of the things that I like and no other people, so I get you, Louie.
6. He hates his boss and his job, and the golden pikpik carrot incident was likely premeditated.
This probably looks bad, but honestly? As a fellow work-hating anti-capitalist schmuck I get it. The president is for all intents and purposes a huge asshole, from sending Olimar straight back to the planet after selling his ship to not caring that Louie got left behind, just wanting to find the rest of the treasures. I doubt he is very kind to his employees, and doesn't seem very good at running the business. Definitely a funny character, but if he were my boss I would absolutely want to punt him into the sun.
From some other entries he clearly wants to sell certain things to accrue money, but it's for things like getting better kitchen tools and following his dream to have his own cooking show. Clearly being a freight driver isn't what Louie actually wants to do with his life, and he could not give less of a shit about what happens to the company. Very short-sighted on his part, but also again, yeah I get you Louie.
7. He... doesn't like the color red for some reason.
Honestly, I'm not even really sure what to make of this. Is it because it reminds him of the Hocotate ship? Or does he just not like the color? Would be very interesting considering that it's Olimar's signature color. Perhaps that's at least part of why he attacks you in Pikmin 2- though that's speculation for another day.
Also funny to me is his comments on the black-colored treasures. We know blue is his favorite color, but I guess he's also a bit of a goth at heart. Lol.
In conclusion.
I think Louie isn't written or intended to be evil, and Pikmin 4's portrayal of him was intentionally written to confirm this. He's just, as some have said, an agent of chaos, but that doesn't make him a bad person. Just an autistic 20-something working a shitty job he doesn't care about, who loves his grandma and has a mischievous streak and a hyperfixation on food. At least from what I can interpret, ymmv!
#polly speaks#pikmin#pikmin 4 spoilers#pikmin spoilers#pikmin 4#pikmin 2#pikmin 3#louie pikmin#olimar pikmin#character analysis#I guess#I dunno I mostly just wanted to put all this shit together in my brain but I guess other people can see it too haha#This is a non exhaustive list btw I just had a limit to how many images I wanted to wrangle but maybe I'll add on to this in the future#for now uh. Enjoy my weird rambling about the pikmin gremlin
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